#point is I think I have enough material to do a full historical reconstruction of star wars.

[thevegetablewhichnoonedaresname]

catch me out here consuming every piece of media that references another piece of media that is foundational to the genre as it currently stands and never touching the foundational one

[elliethesuperfruitlover]

I’m So Baked (says the pie)

A/N: So I’ve been paying more attention to Topazi (mentally) and I realize that I need more shenanigans between her and Klaus..so here we are.

Warnings: some suggestive material

Tag List:  @joz-stankovich, @misskittysmagicportal, @badsext, @super-unpredictable98, @the-freckled-luba, @magic-multicolored-miracle, @ghouls-buddy, @maerenee930, @frogs–are–bitches, @neuroticpuppy, @forenschik, @bisexualnathanyoung, @robert-sheehan, @firstpersonnarrator, @salvador-daley, @lokis-rock-n-roll-chick

“Klaus, what happened to your hand?!” Topazi asked, as her partner walked in, his hand held far away from his body, almost as if it had offended him greatly.

“I was trying to get inside of the house and the patio door shut on my hand. We need to get that fixed at some point.” he said, putting a generous amount of dish soap on his “Hello” hand before putting it under the tap.

“I’ll put it on my list to get to. Do you know when Allison and Claire are supposed to be coming over. I need to make sure I have time to get the flowers done beforehand. And I need to make sure there’s no extra snails in them, like I’ve let slide recently.” she added, getting her tools gathered on the floor of the living room.

“Uh, I think she said around regular dinnertime, 6-7ish.” Klaus replied, and Topazi let out a sigh of relief. That’s plenty of time to construct and reconstruct her design.

  It was a simple bouquet, really. Allison hadn’t asked for a specific type of flowers, but she wanted to get a specific message across. Maternal love and affection. Claire had been through quite a lot, and she wanted to be sure that her kid knew that she loved her very much. Material objects only do so much as well, so Allison planned to write a letter, and just generally try to spend more time with her kid, and be there for her more.

“That’s valid.” T remembered saying, as she picked a few cinquefoils, as well as a few carnations from her collection, looking back at her sketch.

  It reminded her in pieces of a sunflower, actually, how it looked. There wasn’t a darkness in the center, but she chose yellow cinquefoils, and yellow carnations, with regular greenery on the outside, so she’d need to change something up a little. She worked away for some time, and made multiples of the same bouquet, trying different combinations of the flowers.

  In the kitchen, Klaus was looking at a recipe book. He wanted to make Allison one of her favorite desserts, a key-lime pie. He was sure that there were limes somewhere in the house (or if the neighbors have some). There had been multiple occasions where he wished to make a specific dish and lacked a few ingredients. Topazi had mentioned, in passing, of her wishes of having a fruit orchard. That would help with the fruit issue, lest Klaus decide to become a full-time baker. It may not be a huge one, but she wanted to provide for herself. Plus, who doesn’t want to take care of plants?

“Now where is the microblade?” he asked himself as he rumbled through the cabinets, trying to make sure he didn’t let anything drop too loudly.

“I don’t even know if we have one.” Topazi replied, eyes focused on trying to properly tie a ribbon on one of her bouquets.

“Ah, here it is!” Klaus exclaimed, extracting the microblade from between the cheese grater and a plate.

   He finally went into the fridge after a few more minutes of glancing over the ingredient page, and withdrew a few limes from the bottom drawers. Soon enough, Klaus began working on the crust, and took some of his anger out (mostly at the sliding door) pounding the graham crackers to crumbs. A small part of him wanted to taste said crumbs, but then he remembered that it was for his sister, not him. (although her giving him a slice isn’t completely out of the question) He pressed the crumbs into the side of the pie plate, making sure to press from the bottom, going up. He put it in the oven, took note of the time, and got started on the filling.

“T, why do you like flowers so much?” Klaus asked, zesting a lime. He knew the obvious answer, “They’re pretty, and a lot of people like them.” However, he wanted to hear his partner talk, as the sound of the cicadas outside were beginning to annoy him.

“I like them because what’s not to like about them? In a sense. They’re pretty, and were historically used as a means to communicate, when people thought it rude and insensitive to discuss such things in public. Everything about them is made so carefully, down to how they look microscopically. Even though plants themselves aren’t sentient, they still live, and have their own systems to maintain, and how they work. If one was to extract a piece of DNA from a sunflower, specifically one that gives it its color, our perception would be completely different of it.” she stops for a moment to collect her thoughts.

“It’s also how people work, too. I like flowers because they’re easy to maintain, if you know what you’re doing, and don’t forget they exist, or run out of energy. And they’re so nice to look at. You’ve seen me stop in parks to just admire how flowers are placed in the mulch, or soil. They planters may have had the littlest idea of how I would view them, even down to what order they put them in, but they’re there. I find it so worth it to just pause for a moment, and to think, and indulge in the true meaning of something, even if it wasn’t meant to be. That’s why I like flowers. It’s completely fine to just see the surface when someone gets you flowers “Ah, they got me something pretty, and thought of me to give me this. It’s a meaningful gift.” But I want to pick apart every part of it. Because there’s so much more to so many things than what you see.” she responds, and jumps when she looks up to see Klaus leaning over the kitchen island, his face in his hands.

  His hands have small bits of pulp on them, and the “Kiss the Cook” apron that he wears has abstract juice drippage on it.

“I fuckin’ love you T.” Klaus whispers, and bends over to capture her lips in a gentle kiss, and he feels her smile into it. Her hands carefully come to wrap around his neck, making sure not to get any of the stem juice in his hair.

“Love you too.” she whispers back, pulling away “Your crust smells just a smidge burnt (pronounced buent), by the way.” she says, picking up her phone to refresh her memory of other flower requests. A small look of panic passes across his face before he pushes himself off of the counter, practically ripping the oven door off to check on his crust.

  It, fortunately enough, wasn’t too terribly damaged. It wasn’t too crisp, or burnt. He set it on the stove to rest for a moment, and he grabbed the yogurt from the fridge, and sweetened condensed milk from the pantry. He poured the juice, zest, yogurt, and sweetened condensed milk into a bowl, and whisked to combine.

“I never thought I would be so turned on by a man cooking, and the pie isn’t even for me.” T admitted, looking at the way Klaus’ arms flexed while he continued to mix the ingredients together.

“Oh, is that right. I’ll be cooking a lot more then, if your response is openly admitting your horniness to my non-conformity to gender roles.” he said casually, blowing a stray hair out of his face.

 Topazi looked up, and stared Klaus straight in the face, and put a finger up, opening her mouth, only to close it, and put her finger down.

“I’m not sharing my thoughts with a malewife like you.” she uttered, shaking her head in mock disgust.

“And this malewife puts it down every evening for you, willingly that is, and this is how I’m treated, ugh, the gumption.” he mutters, putting a hand to his chest, feigning disgust.

  Topazi and Klaus look at each other once more before breaking out in laughter, urging Minnie, who was sitting on the floor, to wake up from her nap. Klaus snorted, hand gripping the counter. Topazi had to put her head down to prevent any excess spittle from getting on her flowers. Once they caught their collective breaths, Klaus poured the filling into the crust, and put it into the oven to bake. He washed the dishes that he had, and dried the bowl, due to needing it for the topping.

“Okay, good, I just need to write these cards, then I’ll be done with this.” T said, grabbing them, and grabbed a permanent marker.

“These look really good T!” Klaus exclaimed, his eyes shining with glee.

“Thank you love.” she said, dragging a hand across her face. She stood up to stretch, and her back cracked loudly, mildly surprising her. She walked over to Klaus and wrapped her hands around his waist, her head resting on his back.

“Every time you put your arms around my waist like that, I swear I gain 10 more years of life.” he said, wiping his hands on his apron. She felt the vibrations of his speech on her face, and she took a deep breath before responding.

“I wonder what happens when I hug you then.” T said, walking away to put the flowers in their designated “T’s flowers, do not touch nor smell.” place in the fridge.

“I’m so smart, I know.” he retorted, pouring the heavy cream into a bowl, along with a few tablespoons of confectioners’ sugar. T jumped at the sound, and shook it off. 

  She had mentally took note of the time Klaus put the pie in, and took an oven mitt off of the hook, (patterned with tiny cookies on it) The top looked set enough, and she set it to rest on the counter. She turned the oven off, and watched as Klaus finished whipping the topping, holding it upside down to check if it was ready. It didn’t fall on his head, so he put plastic wrap over it, and looked outside for a short moment, looking up the tree in the front yard. 

  He took a breath, and thought for a second. Maybe a bit too long. His mind fluttered back to what it took for him to be where he was. How much it physically took out of him, his siblings, hell, even the timeline for him to be able to have a peaceful life (for the most part) and a loving partner. A tear slipped down his face, and he thought of how silent the ghost had been recently. He still had his powers, but the ghosts seemed to respect his current want for peace. And he loved that. He would float around the house if his feet were tired, and sometimes even do a side gig of being a medium if he felt inclined to. However, something about knowing that he couldn’t physically see Ben anymore, (his Ben, he thought, now with his newest collection of siblings, with a limited edition Sparrow Ben). He still even missed the cult, even with its downsides. He never got the right type of parental love, or familial love. At times, he doubted his siblings’ love for him, even though they’d made it pretty obvious that they’d be there for him, lest he need it.

  “Hey, Klaus, the- are you alright?” Topazi asks. She had been calling a few clients back from her home office, telling them that their bouquets had been completed. She got a random craving for cookies, and planned to go to the kitchen to make them, but she found Klaus in tears, hand covering his mouth. He hadn’t even noticed her there.

“Yeah, yeah I’m fine. I was just thinking too much.” he explained, letting her wipe the tears from his face.

“You sure?” she asked, and he nodded before taking a deep breath, and releasing it. “I was just coming in here to A. make some cookies, and B. tell you that the pie is good and cooled, and it’s time for it to be topped.” she said, rubbing his back gently.

“Okay. Thank you T.” he responded, gathering the willpower to put the whipped cream on the pie, and adding small lime slices and spare zest on top. He smiled at the completed job, and put it in the fridge to finish chilling.

“Go take a nap darling. You’ve been on your feet for a while, and you look tired. I’ll let you know when Allison is here. Or at least 5 minutes before.” she whispered, kissing Klaus’ cheek. She looked at him for a moment more, and cupped his cheek with her hand. The light scruff that covered the bottom of his chin tickled her hand, and she had the urge to scratch her palm. She however, resisted said urge, and took her hand away. Klaus smiled at her once more, and trotted up the stairs, with Minnie in tow behind him. Topazi went back to the kitchen and gathered her ingredients. She spun some vinyl as background music, and got to work on her cookies.

  A couple hours pass, and Topazi is drying the last cookie sheet she used for her cookies, putting it back in its rightful spot. She stretched again, and checked her phone, seeing that Allison had texted her a few seconds go, saying that she was on the way, which gave her about 30 minutes to get Klaus awake. She headed up the stairs, and ended their bedroom, where Klaus was sprawled across the sheets Minnie resting on his pillow. T gently shook him awake with one hand, and giving chin scratches to Minnie with the other.

“Come on, it’s time to get up Klausie.” she mutters, watching as her partner came to slowly, more of his hair having escaped from its confinements.

“Hmmm, I’ll be more up in a bit. You smell good, hon.” he whispered, rubbing his eyes.

 The sun was shining in his face, and although it may have been mildly uncomfortable to wake up to, he looked absolutely stunning in it. His hair seemed to glow, and his skin, albeit a little pale, seemed to reflect every bit of sun that hit it. His eyes though, seemed to be pools of emerald and gold. Topazi admired him from afar, and she ignored the strong urge to climb into bed with him and bask in the sunlight together.

“You’re staring love.” Klaus says, leaning on his arm in bed, petting Minnie, who was beginning to wake up as well. She meowed gently, and purred at his touch.

“Oh, hush. Like you haven’t stared at me in the sun before.”

“.....You got me there.”

“Yeah, mhm.” Topazi said, jokingly side-eyeing Klaus.

“Come here mama.” Klaus teases, pulling T’s arm towards him. She falls into Klaus’ arms, her head resting right below his. He bends down and kisses her lips, breaking away, before Topazi reciprocates the gesture, taking a small handful of Klaus’ hair in her fingers. Klaus smiles, and chuckles, letting his mouth fall to her neck. He nuzzles into it, and they sit there for several minutes, before coming to a realization.

“Oh shit, I forgot that Allison and Claire are coming over.” T said. “I’ve got to get the cookies in the jar...and I need to fix the bed too.”

“Ah, calm down. It’s fine. She’s not going to come up here and see where we engage in sinful activities, is she? No. However, I would love to join you in the cookie jarring.” Klaus mutters, smiling at her.

“Fine, you can help. But so help me god if I find even a crumb on the freshly swept floor.” Topazi said, closing the bedroom door behind her.

  T worked quickly to get the cookies together, and Klaus took a very short shower, as he knew that it would help wake him up, and he could go back to bed without having to worry about showering again. The doorbell sounded, and Topazi almost slipped trying to get to the door. She checked herself in the mirror once more before letting her niece and sister in law into the house.

“Hey Allison! And little miss Claire.” Topazi said, giving the respective people their own hugs.

“How’ve you been T?” Allison asked as she was welcomed in, shoes taken off at the door. She was also carrying a dish of some sort, covered in Aluminum Foil.

“I’ve been good. The business has been going well, and I’m thinking of making an orchard.” T replies, leading them both to the living room. “Let me get that for you.”

“That’s good. Claire’s been begging me to let her go visit the shop, but it’s always been at a bad time. Oh, thank you! I brought dinner as a bit of a treat.”

“It’s much appreciated. I like seeing you both, and having you two visit would never be a hassle.” she replies, petting JJ, the other cat, who just so happened to be waiting for attention.

“IS THAT MY SISTER AND MY FAVORITE NIECE?” Klaus yelled from the top of the stairs, quickly running down them to give his sibling a hug.

“Uncle Klaus!” Claire exclaimed, giving said uncle a very big hug around his middle, only to be picked up.

“How’ve you been, Allison, smaller Allison?” he asked, setting his niece back on the couch before taking the place next to his partner.

“We’ve been good.” Allison says. “We’ve been doing really good.” 

  The four of them sit and converse for a while, and eventually dinnertime comes around, signaled by Klaus’ stomach growling loudly. Allison had brought a very large amount of lasagna, and Topazi immediately dug in, which shocked Klaus, but he’d bring the cause up at a later time. Claire did, however, get a pre-dinner cookie (Topazi’s request because “That’s how you teach kids that good things come to people who deserve them.”)

“So, I do so happen to have a bit of a surprise for the both of you.” Klaus says, standing up and opening the fridge.

“Ooh, what is it?” Allison asks excitedly, and Claire matches her mother’s expression.

  Klaus pulls out the pie, and T moves to gently give Claire her bouquet, asking her to hold it a specific way as to not jostle the flowers, or change the position of the ribbon.

“That’s so pretty, T! Oh my gosh, I need to ask you to make more things for me, I swear I’ll pay you in whatever you want.” Allison exclaims, looking at the bouquet, leaning forward to smell some of the flowers.

“Thank you! The meanings of the flowers, and ribbon placement are on the card. Also your brother made a whole pie...by himself......we need to eat it before he does.” she teases, sticking a pointed thumb back at her partner, who already had a knife out to cut said pie.

“Klaus, it’s my favorite! Thank you so much.” Allison says, taking another bite of the pie.

“This is really good Uncle Klaus.” Claire states, looking across the island at him.

“Why danke. It was made with love. Both the pie and the bouquet, actually.” he said, kissing T on the cheek. She smiled against him, and took a piece of the pie for herself, trying to resist eating the rest of the pie it all of its entirety.

  The night came to an end, and Allison and Claire said their respective goodbyes, and drove off. T and Klaus lay in bed that night, with a book and knitting needles in hand, respectively. Klaus feels a weight against his shoulder, and Topazi had fallen asleep, small breaths escaping her lips. He put a marker in her book, and took note of note of where he stopped in his stitches. It took him some more time to get to sleep that night, probably due to his earlier nap, but he got to sleep, so peacefully. Something he’d wished for many a day, and now it seemed that he was finally getting it answered.

Masterlist

Key Lime Pie

[tanadrin]

now i want to hear your distinct rants on all those religions, but especially taoism, vudun, and norse paganism

Norse paganism is Super Problematic: human sacrifice! nothing wrong with pillaging from Constantinople to Ireland and back! slavery entirely condoned! Plus a mythology so depressing that the whole religion was abandoned en masse almost as soon as missionaries showed up and promised the existence of a loving god and a world that wasn’t going to abruptly end one day because all the gods were going to get eaten by a wolf.

Side rant: deeply spiritual reconstructions of pagan religion usually miss the fact that historically rites and rituals in polytheistic traditions (including Norse, Roman, Celtic, and Greek traditions) were all about a purely transactional relationship between gods and men; you sacrificed to Odin not because he was a Jungian archetype of the human spirit, but because if you did your raiding expedition would be successful. If your “paganism” 1) doesn’t literally believe in the existence of the gods, and 2) doesn’t treat them as a supernatural vending machine (Insert Entrails, Receive Blessing and/or Curse), I’m pretty sure what you’ve got is a cosplay situation that takes itself too seriously.

(unless you’re up front about the fact that recovering the exact mindset and traditions of the past is impossible, and any attempt to do so will always have to confront the fact that you cannot entirely forsake the material and social conditions that inevitably color how you view the metaphysical, in which case, respect)

Taoism is a political philosophy that got eaten by supernatural speculation; but even the core political philosophy was... not very good. It was, essentially, a kind of primitivist authoritarianism, that saw the best way to ensure prosperity and prevent war was to fragment society into tiny states that barely needed any kind of leadership, to keep people tied to the land and ignorant of their surroundings, and to eschew learning and scholarship. While it can be seen as a reasonable reaction for the time against the turmoil of the period in which it was written, at least the Mohists were capable of direct action (many became siege engineers, on the principle that helping cities defend themselves discouraged wars of conquest!). And the existence of the Mohists, like the existence of the Carvaka school of Indian philosophy, kiiiinda disproves that “well, they did the best they could for the time in which they lived.” Empiricism and rationalism did well enough in the last millennium BCE that we still know the names of major philosophical schools and philosophers that led them; they just weren’t expedient to authority, and so other schools, like Legalism and Confucianism, were preferred.

So Taoism sucks on its own merits, and on purely instrumental ones. Plus, in the form it persisted--with extremely hit-or-miss-or-downright-dangerous medical and alchemical speculation bolted on to it, full of supernaturalism--I think it’s fair to say that it has probably caused more harm than good in the millennia since. The best you can say about alternative medicine out of the Taoist school is that the placebo effect is a thing, I guess; but considering there is an entire Wikipedia page devoted to how Chinese alchemists have poisoned themselves to death, and that Taoist alchemists had to come up with a variety of excuses to explain how their immortality elixirs were supposed to work when the alchemist in question was lying dead on the floor, I am gonna say tentatively that the harms outweigh the benefits here.

Vodoun and its new world relatives does not seem especially worse than your bog-standard traditional oracular mysticism-cum-supernaturalism, but it also doesn’t seem any better.

Also AFAICT (I welcome correct on this point) every religion in this ask and in the other one fails the basic test of “is slavery OK” and “is homosexuality OK”, except for maybe Taoism and homosexuality. Though some obviously fail these tests harder than others. Special mention to Norse Paganism, which--as much as I love the ancient Norse--is just terrible.

[southeastasianists]

If you’re a medieval historian, you normally work a lot with manuscripts. A manuscript is just a text written by hand, although manuscripts are distinguished from inscriptions by the material on which they are written: a manuscript is normally written on perishable materials — like calfskin in much of Europe, birch bark in Russia and Central Asia, bamboo and paper in East Asia, and palm leaves in India and Southeast Asia — while an inscription is cut into a stone or metal surface. Manuscripts are usually a lot more informative than inscriptions and also a lot more diverse in content and authorship. In Europe and Northeast Asia there are a lot of medieval manuscripts.

An image from Royal Armouries manuscript I.33, the oldest armed martial arts treatise in the world. It was written in southern Germany in the early fourteenth century, and is thus older than almost any extant Indo-Malaysian manuscript on any topic. This says a lot about the range of sources historians working in each region can expect to use. Full manuscript can be found here (Wiktenauer).

Manuscripts are often illustrated, giving valuable information about life and times not explicitly recorded in writing. Their pages can be dated chemically, giving reasonably precise dates even to texts without written chronograms — although this isn’t necessary with many texts, as close dates can often be established on the basis of the script. If the script looks like a fourteenth-century script, you’re probably looking at a fourteenth-century text (although there’s more to it than that). There are enough texts to allow for this kind of detailed palaeographic analysis in much of Europe and temperate Asia.

The language and script (littera hybrida) of this manuscript tell us that it was written in around the middle of the fifteenth century in the Low Countries. There are tons of manuscripts in littera hybrida; it was practically the national script of the Netherlands in the fifteenth century.

All of this should be reasonably obvious and well-known. Here, though, I want to point out that medieval Afro-Eurasia — let’s leave the Americas aside for the purposes of this article — wasn’t a single temperate environment in which both state and private archives hoarded and preserved large numbers of texts written on organic materials. These kinds of sources just aren’t available for much of the world, whether because writing never developed there or because organic materials don’t last long in certain environments. Naturally, these problems are particularly acute in humid tropical climates.

In much of the tropics, insects, heat, and humidity meant that even if texts were written on palm leaves and animal skins, they had to be deliberately preserved or copied perhaps once in a generation in order to make their way down to us today. This wasn’t the case in England or China; a locked wooden box in a parish church or town hall would be sufficient to keep a piece of parchment safe and few special measures needed to be taken. The medieval historical record is thus inherently biased in favour of societies in temperate climes.

The number of genuinely medieval manuscripts from Southeast Asia can be counted on one hand, even though we know from inscriptions that writing has a long history in the region (dating back to the fourth century and possibly earlier). The oldest extant Malay manuscript has been radiocarbon dated to the fourteenth century, even though the oldest Malay inscriptions date to the seventh century and are thus slightly older than the oldest texts in English. We are consequently reliant on inscriptions for the reconstruction of much of medieval Indo-Malaysian history and society, and on much later (definitively post-medieval) manuscripts for the study of Southeast Asian literature. This gives a particular spin to historical events and restricts what can be studied through traditional philological methods.

“Raja Barus”, ‘the King of Barus’ in a Malay manuscript of 1797, one of the oldest copies of the Hikayat Raja Pasai. The story probably dates to the fourteenth century. Yes: it was written in the late eighteenth century. Yes: it’s a good source for the fourteenth century. That’s how a lot of history in the tropics works. Deal with it.

This presents scholars of the medieval Old World tropics with a bit of a problem. Historians of medieval Europe can freely parade manuscript illustrations in books and, nowadays, on social networks without any qualms because the illustrations they’re showing off are bona fide medieval images. But you can’t do that if the manuscripts didn’t survive, and there are a lot of issues involved in using later manuscripts to demonstrate earlier art and history. How can a complete picture of the Hemispheric Middle Ages be created and shown to the world when Indonesian and tropical African manuscripts are so late and so poorly represented?

Should scholars of the medieval tropics focus on ‘legitimately’ medieval things — bronzes, inscriptions, reliefs — or should they include later images of supposedly earlier phenomena and risk collapsing the entire history of e.g. Indonesia into one undivided whole?

In museums you tend to find the latter approach. In the Tropenmuseum in Amsterdam, the oldest keris in the world (made, or at least inscribed, in 1342 CE) is in the same case as a piece of nineteenth-century Muslim headgear. Colonial-era dress and artworks rub shoulders with tenth-century bronzes and thirteenth-century statues. I find that problematic; you wouldn’t put a medieval English sword and a Regency-era lady’s bonnet in the same display, I shouldn’t think. Europe and Indonesia are thus treated differently: Europe’s history is divided into sections that are studied more or less independently while Asian history, and especially tropical Asian history, is treated as one inseparable whole, divided more by region than by period. This is one reason among many why Southeast Asia may never be integrated into the academic study of the medieval world (let alone the popular imagination about the Middle Ages).

And what about eastern Indonesia and New Guinea? Neither part produced any written literature, as far as we know, before the fifteenth century, and the oldest manuscripts from eastern Indonesia date to the early sixteenth century. New Guinea was part of the medieval world; it was certainly known to people in fourteenth- and fifteenth-century Java and other parts of Indonesia. But what can we show the world to represent this medieval Papuan history? There aren’t any manuscripts. There aren’t even any sculptures or very many bronze objects (although some of the latter are occasionally found). That doesn’t mean New Guinea just vanished from the world in the Middle Ages or that the people there preserved some primordial ‘Stone Age’ lifeways, though, as the popular imagination seems to have it.

Art in New Guinea, whether on the coasts or in the highlands, is dominated by wooden sculpture. While plenty of carved wooden objects survive from temperate medieval Eurasia, no examples of the wooden sculpture of medieval New Guinea have come down to us. Can we assume that modern sculpture is representative of earlier tradition?

That seems like a big leap to me. New Guinea isn’t a primeval place unchanged since the dawn of time but rather a place full of creative human beings, a place where fashion and religion operate like they do anywhere else. Showing a Papuan carving made in the twentieth century by a specific artist from a particular ethnic group as if it were representative of a prehistoric or medieval tradition would ultimately be as peculiar as using David Hockney’s oeuvre to showcase medieval English painting. Style always changes. Where truly medieval eastern Indonesian art has survived, as with a few of the lovely textiles preserved as heirlooms in Timor, the motifs are strikingly different from modern ones.

If we want to raise awareness of the tropical world, then, how do we go about it? How can scholars working on Europe get to know island Southeast Asia and the Swahili coast without introducing an orientalist bias that treats the Middle Ages as identical to modern times, or to some arbitrary ‘traditional’ point in the past? It’s a real conundrum. I suspect, though, that the solution is to help expand the traditional medievalist’s view of what constitutes valid evidence about the medieval world — and perhaps to highlight the ways in which the temperate world diverges from the tropics.

Does the absence of a written or artistic or sculptural record exclude a place from consideration as part of the ‘Global Middle Ages’? Yes — if you restrict yourself to the methods and ideas of traditional medieval scholarship. But if the objective is to account for and better understand the world before the Columbian Exchange, methods simply have to be broadened: the triangulation of archaeology, comparative ethnography, historical linguistics, oral history, and ethnohistory has to be brought in to complement traditional philological scholarship. If that isn’t done then our image of the medieval world will always be restricted to what was written down and preserved, and that naturally introduces a bias towards the temperate — and perhaps also to the European, the white, and the colonial.

This article first appeared as a post on the Medieval Indonesia blog, and a version of its argument has appeared in print in Bryan C. Keene (ed.), 2019,Toward a Global Middle Ages, Los Angeles: The J. Paul Getty Museum.

[oscopelabs]

3D, Part 2: How 3D Peaked At Its Valley by Vadim Rizov

I didn’t expect to spend Thanksgiving Weekend 2018 watching ten 3D movies: marathon viewing is not my favorite experience in general, and I haven’t spent years longing to see, say, Friday the 13th Part III, in 35mm. But a friend was visiting, from Toronto, to take advantage of this opportunity, an impressive level of dedication that seemed like something to emulate, and it’s not like I had anything better to do, so I tagged along. Said friend, Blake Williams, is an experimental filmmaker and 3D expert, a subject to which he’s devoted years of graduate research and the bulk of his movies (see Prototype if it comes to a city near you!); if I was going to choose the arbitrary age of 32 to finally take 3D seriously, I couldn’t have a better Virgil to explain what I was seeing on a technical level. My thanks to him (for getting me out there) and to the Quad Cinema for being my holiday weekend host; it was probably the best possible use of my time.

The 10-movie slate was an abridged encore presentation of this 19-film program, which I now feel like a dink for missing. What’s interesting in both is the curatorial emphasis on films from 3D’s second, theoretically most disreputable wave—‘80s movies with little to zero critical respect or profile. Noel Murray considered a good chunk of these on this site a few years ago, watching the films flat at home, noting that when viewed this way, “the plane-breaking seems all the more superfluous. (It’s also easy to spot when these moments are about to happen, because the overall image gets murkier and blurrier.)” This presumes that if you can perceive the moments where a 3D film expands its depth of field for a comin’-at-ya moment and mentally reconstruct what that would look like, that’s basically the same experience as actually seeing these effects.

Blake’s argument, which I wrestled with all weekend, is that these movies do indeed often look terrible in 2D, but 3D literally makes them better. As it turns out, this is true surprisingly often. Granted, all concerned have to know what they’re doing, otherwise the results will still be indifferent: it turns out that Friday the 13th Part III sucks no matter how you watch it, and 3D’s not a complete cure-all. This was also demonstrated by my first movie, 1995’s barely released Run For Cover, the kind of grade-Z library filler you’d expect to see sometime around 2 am on a syndicated channel. This is, ostensibly, a thriller, in which a TV news cameraman foils a terrorist plot against NYC. It features a lot of talking, scenes of Bondian villains eating Chinese takeout while plotting and/or torturing our ostensible hero, some running (non-Tom Cruise speed levels), and one The Room-caliber sex scene. Anyone who’s spent too much time mindlessly staring at the least promising option on TV has seen many movies like these. The 3D helps a little: an underdressed TV station set takes on heightened diorama qualities, making it interesting to contemplate as an inadvertent installation—the archetypal TV command room, with the bare minimum necessary signifiers in place and zero detail otherwise—rather than simply a bare-bones set. But often the camera is placed nowhere in particular, and the resulting images are negligible; in the absence of dramatic conviction or technical skill, what’s left is never close enough to camp to come back out the other side as inadvertently worthwhile. I’m glad I saw it for the sheer novelty of cameos from Ed Koch, Al Sharpton and Guardian Angels founder Curtis Sliwa—all doing their usual talking points, but in 3D! But it’s the kind of film that’s more fun to tell people about than actually watch.

But infamous punchlines Jaws 3-D and Amityville 3-D have their virtues when viewed in 3D. The former, especially, seems to be the default punching bag whenever someone wants to make the case that 3D has, and always will be, nothing but a limited gimmick upselling worthless movies. It was poorly reviewed when it came out, but the public dug it enough to make it, domestically, the 15th highest-grossing film of 1983 (between Never Say Never Again and Scarface) and justify Jaws: The Revenge. Of course I was skeptical; why wouldn’t I be? But I was sucked in by the opening credits, in which the familiar handheld-underwater-cam-as-shark POV gave way to a severed arm floating before a green “ocean.” Maybe flat it looks simply ludicrous, but the image has a compellingly Lynchian quality, as if the limb were detached from one of Twin Peaks: The Return’s more disgusting corpses, its artifice heightened and literally foregrounded, the equally artificial background setting it into greater relief.

The film’s prominent SeaWorld product placement is, theoretically, ill-advised, especially in the post-Blackfish era; in practice, it’s extremely productive. The opening stretches have a lot of water-skiing; in deep 3D, the water-skiers serve as lines tracing depth towards and away from the camera over a body of water whose horizon line stretches back infinitely, producing a greater awareness of space. It reminded me of the early days of the short-lived super-widescreen format Cinerama, as described by John Belton in his academic history book Widescreen Cinema (recommended). The very first film in the format, This is Cinerama, was a travelogue whose stops included Cypress Gardens, Florida’s first commercial tourist theme park (the site is now a Legoland), which has very similar images of waterskiiers. Cinerama was, per the publicist copy Belton quotes from the period, about an experience, not a story: “Plot is replaced by audience envelopment […] the medium forces you to concentrate on something bigger than people, for it has a range of vision and sound that no other medium offers.” Cinerama promised to immerse viewers, as literalized in this delightful publicity image; Belton argues that “unlike 3-D and CinemaScope, which stressed the dramatic content of their story material and the radical new means of technology employed in production, Cinerama used a saturation advertising campaign in the newspapers and on radio to promote the ‘excitement aspects’ of the new medium.” There’s a connection here with the earliest days of silent cinema, short snippets (“actualities”) of reality, before it was decided that medium’s primary purpose was to tell a story. It didn’t have to be like that; in those opening stretches, Jaws 3-D’s lackadaisical narrative, which might play inertly on TV, recalls the 1890s, when shots of bodies of water were popular subjects. This is something I learned from a recent presentation by silent film scholar Bryony Dixon, and her reasoning makes sense. The way water moves is inherently hypnotic, and for early audiences assimilating their very first moving images, water imagery was a favorite subject. It’s only with a few years under its belt that film started making its drift towards narrative as default; inadvertently or not, Jaws 3-D is very pure in its initial presentation of water as a spectacular, non-narrative event.

If this seems like a lot of cultural and historical weight to bring to bear upon Jaws 3-D, note that it wasn’t even my favorite of the more-scorned offerings I saw that weekend, merely one that makes it easiest for me to articulate what I found compelling about the 3D immersion experience. I haven’t described the plot of Jaws 3-D at all, which is indeed perfunctory (though it was nice to learn where Deep Blue Sea cribbed a bunch of its production design from). I won’t try to rehabilitate Amityville 3-D at similar length: set aside the moronic ending and Tony Roberts’ leading turn as one of cinema’s most annoyingly waspish, unearnedly whiny divorcees, and what’s left is a surprisingly melancholy movie about the frustrations, and constant necessary repairs, of home ownership. There’s very little music and a surprising amount of silence. The most effective moment is simply Roberts going upstairs to the bathroom, where steam is hissing out for no apparent reason and he has to fix the plumbing. The camera’s planted in the hallway, not moving for any kind of emphasis as the back wall moves closer to Roberts; it doesn’t kill him and nothing comes of it, it’s just another problem to deal with (the walls, as it were, are settling), made more effective by awareness of how a space whose rules and boundaries seemed fixed is being altered, pushing air at you.

Watching a bunch of these in sequence, some clear lessons emerge: if you want to generate compelling depth by default, find an alleyway and block off the other half of the frame with a wall to present two different depths, or force protagonists to crawl through ducts or tubes. This is a good chunk of Silent Madness, a reasonably effective slasher film that, within the confines of its cheap sets and functional plotting, keeps the eye moving. It’s an unlikely candidate for a deep-dive New York Times Magazine article from the time period, which is well worth reading in full. It’s mostly about B-movies and the actresses trying to make their way up through them, though it does have this money quote from director Simon Nuchtern about why, for Bs, it’s not worth paying more for a good lead actress: “If I had 10,000 extra dollars, I’d put it into lights. Not one person is going to say, ‘Go see that movie because Lynn Redgrave is in it.’ But if we don’t have enough lights and that 3-D doesn’t pop right out at you, people are going to say, ‘Don’t see that movie because the 3-D stinks.’” Meanwhile, nobody appears to have been thinking that hard while making Friday the 13th: Part III, which contains precisely one striking image: a pan, street morning, as future teen lambs-to-the-slaughter exit their van and walk over to a friend’s house. A lens flare hits frame left, making what’s behind it briefly impossible to see: this portion of the frame is now sealed off under impermeable 2D, in contrast to the rest of the frame’s now far-more-tangible depth. The remainder of the movie makes it easy to imagine watching it on TV and clocking every obvious, poorly framed and blocked 3D effect, from spears being thrown at the camera to the inevitable yo-yo descending at the lens. (This is my least favorite 3D effect because it’s just too obvious and counterproductively makes me think of the Smothers Brothers.)

Friday the 13th was the biggest slog of the 3D weekend, and the one most clearly emulating 1981’s Comin’ at Ya! I am not going to argue for that movie, either, which is generally credited with kicking off the second 3D craze; it’s a sludgy spaghetti western that delivers exactly as its title promises, using a limited number of effects repeatedly before showing them all again in a cut-together montage at the end, lest you missed one in its first iteration. It’s exhausting and oddly joyless, but was successful enough to generate a follow-up from the same creative team. Star Tony Anthony and director Ferdinando Baldi (both veterans of second-tier spaghetti westerns) re-teamed for 1983’s Treasure of the Four Crowns, the movie which (two screenings in) rewired my brain a little and convinced me I should hang around all weekend. This is not a well-respected film, then or now: judging by IMDb user comments, most people who remember seeing it recall it playing endlessly on HBO in the ‘80s, where it did not impress them unless they were very young (and even then, perhaps not). Janet Maslin admitted to walking out on it in her review; then again, she did the same with Dawn of the Dead, and everyone loves that.

An unabashed Indiana Jones copy, Treasure begins strong with a lengthy opening sequence of tomb raider J.T. Striker (Anthony) dropping into a cave, where he’s promptly confronted not only with a bunch of traps but, for a long stretch, a small menagerie’s worth of owls, dogs, and other wildlife. There are a lot of animals, and why not? They’re fun to look at, and having them trotted out, one after another, is another link back to silent cinema; besides water, babies and animals were also popular subjects. The whole sequence ends with Striker running away from the castle above the cave, artifact retrieved, in slow-motion as Ennio Morricone’s score blares. There is, inevitably and nonsensically, a fireball that consumes the set; it unfolds luxuriously in detailed depth, the camera placed on a grassy knoll that gives us a nice angle to contemplate it looking upwards, a nearly abstract testament to the pleasures of gasoline-fueled imagery. Shortly thereafter, Striker is in some European city to sell his wares, and in every shot the camera is placed for maximum depth: in front of a small city park’s mini-waterfall, views of streets boxed in by sidewalks that narrow towards each other, each position calibrated to create a spectacular travelogue out of what’s a fairly mundane location. There’s an expository sequence where Striker and friends drop into a diner to ask about the whereabouts of another member of the crew they need to round up. Here, with the camera on one side of a bar encircling a center counter, there are something like six layers of cleanly articulated space, starting with a plant’s leaves right in front of the lens on the side, proceeding to the counter, center area, back counter, back tables and walls of the establishment. Again, the location is mundane; seeing it filleted in space so neatly is what makes it special.

The climax finally convinced me I was watching forgotten greatness. This is an elaborate heist sequence in which, of course, the floor cannot be touched, necessitating that the team perform all kinds of rappelling foolishness. At this point I thought, “the only way I could respect this movie more is if it spent 10 minutes watching them get from one side of the room to another in real time.” First, the team has to gear up, which basically means untangling a bunch of ropes—clearly not the most exciting activity. The camera is looking up, placed below a team member as they uncoil and then drop a rope towards the lens. This is a better-framed variant of the comin’-at-ya principle, but what made it exciting to me was the leisurely way it was done: no more whizzing spears, but a moment of procedural mundanity as exciting as any ostensible danger. Basic narrative film grammar is being upended here: if a rope being dropped is just as exciting as a big, fake rip-off boulder chasing our hero down the cave, then all the rules about what constitutes narrative are off—narrative and non-narrative elements have the exact same weight, and even the most mundane, A-to-B connective shot is a spectacular event.

This isn’t how narrative cinema is supposed to work, and certainly not what James Cameron’s conception of good 3D proposed. The movie keeps going, building to a bizarrely grim climax involving a lot of face-melting, scored by Morricone’s oddly beatific score, which seems serenely indifferent to the grotesqueness of the images it’s accompanying. (This is a recurring trait in the composer’s ‘80s work; the score for White Dog often seems to bear no relation to the footage it’s accompanying.) That would make the movie oneiric and weirdly compelling even on a flat TV, but everything preceding convinced me: 3D can be great because it’s 3D, not because it serves a story. I’ve spent the last decade getting more angry about the format than anything, but that was a misunderstanding. Treasure of the Four Crowns is, yes, probably very unexceptional seen flat; seen in all three dimensions, it’s a demonstration of how 3D can turn banal connective tissue and routine coverage into an event. The spectacle of 3D might never have been its potential to make elaborate CG landscapes more immersive, something I still haven’t personally been convinced of; as those 19 non-CG shots in Avatar showed (undermining Cameron’s own argument!), 3D’s renderings of the real, material world and objects have yet to be fully explored. 3D’s ability to link film back to its earliest days is refreshing, in the way that any rediscovery of forgotten parts of film language can be, while also encouraging thought about all the things narrative visual language hasn’t yet explored, as if 3D could take us forwards and backwards simultaneously. In any case, I’m now won over—ten years after Avatar, but better late than never.

[enddaysengine]

Non-Fiction Resources for Chronicles of Darkness by Gameline

June 6th Update: It seems that Tumblr has a limit to how many links you can put in one post. As a result, I’ve moved the resources for Dark Eras, as well as the links organized by topic, to a separate post that you can find at this link. 

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Much like I did for Eberron, I’m putting together some links to non-fiction materials you could use for Chronicles of Darkness. Since CofD is set in a dark mirror of our world, there are a lot of materials that could go in this post, but I will try to be selective. While I am keeping Chronicles in mind while I do this, you could use these links for any other RPG that is set on historical Earth (I’m looking at you, Call of Cthulhu!) Some links may show up more than once if they fit in multiple categories.

This post is very much a work in progress and probably will never be complete because of the broad availability of applicable materials. If you know of a resource that you don’t see on my list, please feel free to reblog/reply/DM me to say what the resource is and why it should be included on the list. I’ll do my best to add it in.

General Websites

Crash Course: It’s free, it’s on Youtube, and it’s in a ten-minute episodic format. 

Coursera: Coursera is a website where university level classes are available for free. You can also get certifications from Coursera for a fee so you can build your resume while planning your next chronicle. 

Dan Carlin’s Hardcore History: Dan loves historical “What if?” moments, and with good reason. If you want to hear the most badass historical stories, examine how drugs, alcohol, and human stupidity impacted history, or get a sense of what it was like to live through the most brutal historical eras, this is the place for you.

edX: Another excellent site with free courses that you can upgrade for a certificate. A good place to look for courses in the humanities and religion. 

Great Course/Great Courses Plus: GC and GC+ are not free services, but they have such an extraordinarily high production value that you can understand why. History, science, culinary theory, economics, anything you can think of is covered in the Great Courses catalogue. Great Courses Plus is their streaming service, which at $15/month for an annual subscription is a killer deal.

Google Books/Google Scholar: My first goto for research of any kind, and the first place I advise my students to begin their research. Seriously, I’ve written papers, then had them published just using these two. Use them. 

JSTOR: If you have operated in any kind of academic circle for the last two and a half decades, you know JSTOR. Full access is tough to come by unless you are currently enrolled in a university, but you can still sign up for free to get access to journals on topics you just can’t find anywhere else (like the Mutapa Empire). Sign up with multiple users if you have to. It works. Trust me. 

Open Yale Courses: University classes, taped lectures, and course materials, all from one of the best educational institution in the world. Take advantage of them. 

The Vault: Declassified FBI documents. A lot more of them involve the paranormal than you may expect. An excellent source of inspiration both for things that actually happened or that people think happened. 

Writing with Colour: The best place to go to check yourself for unintentionally problematic depictions of POC in your games. Also a great read if you are looking for details and cultural beats for NPCs you don’t share a background with. They are awesome and you’d be surprised how many chronicle ideas you can get just by binging their archive. 

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Mortal Chronicles

Foundations of Eastern Civilization

Maya to Aztec - Ancient Mesoamerica Revealed: Awesome resource if you are planning to run a Skinchangers game using the Aztec Dark Era. 

Medical School for Everyone - Pediatric Grand Rounds: A good place to look for ideas for Innocents 

Understanding Japan - A Cultural History

Beast the Primordial

General

Ancient Marine Reptiles: Yeah, I know, Beast is supposed to be about dragons and monsters, but I guarantee you that plenty of ancient reptiles are also stalking the Primordial Dream. Plus, aquatic reptiles are awesome and don’t get enough face time with the public, so you might want to think about your next Beast being one. 

Dino 101: The ultimate course about Dinosaurs. Very beastly. 

Early Vertebrate Evolution: What’s so scary about ancient fish, you ask? Only razor jaws and bone for skin. 

Secrets to Sleep Science

Theropod Dinosaurs and the Origins of Birds: At five lessons long, this course is pretty short, and the content matter is fascinating (says the biology teacher).

Dark Eras

African-American History: From Emancipation to the Present

The Civil War and Reconstruction Eras

History of the United States 2nd Edition

Signature Settings

Foundations of Eastern Civilization

History of the United States 2nd Edition

Mountains 101: If you are going to visit Kathmandu, you better be thinking about how mountains will impact your Chronicle!

Understanding Japan - A Cultural History

Changeling the Lost

General

Secrets to Sleep Science

Successful Negotiation - Essential Strategies and Skills: A very, very Changeling course. 

Dark Eras

Atlas Historique de Paris: I can’t read French, but I am assured by people who do that this is an excellent resource. 

Foundations of Eastern Civilization

Underground Atlas of Paris

Signature Settings

Foundations of Eastern Civilization

History of the United States 2nd Edition

Understanding Japan - A Cultural History

Demon the Descent 

General

Bitcoin and Cryptocurrency Technologies

Crash Course Computer Science 

Crash Course Games

Digital Signal Processing

Internet History, Technology, and Security

Inventions That Changed the World

Robotics - Ariel Robotics

Successful Negotiation - Essential Strategies and Skills: Also a very, very Demon course. 

Dark Eras

Living in the French Revolution and the Age of Napoleon

Maya to Aztec - Ancient Mesoamerica Revealed

Ottoman Empire

Signature Settings

Cultural Competence - Aboriginal Sydney

A History of Hitler’s Empire

History of the United States 2nd Edition

Hollywood: History, Industry, Art

Ottoman Empire

World War II - A Military and Social History

Geist the Sin-Eater

General

Death: Seriously, that’s all the course is called. It’s Yale, its good, the name is just to the point. 

Soul Beliefs 1 - Historical Foundations

Soul Beliefs 2 - Belief Systems

Soul Beliefs 3 - How Does It All End?

Dark Eras

Foundations of Eastern Civilization

The Great War

History of the United States 2nd Edition

Indigenous Canada

Signature Settings

The Early Middle Ages (284-1000)

History of the United States 2nd Edition

World War II - A Military and Social History

Hunter the Vigil

General

Introduction to Forensics

Aegis Kai Doru

Archaeology - An Introduction to the World’s Greatest Sites

Introduction to Ancient Greek History

Ahl al-Jabal (Source)

Ismaili Gnosis: Okay, breaking alphabetical order here, but this one is special. If you have a passing familiarity with Islam, you may have had the initial thought that the write-up of Ahl al-Jabal doesn’t look like anything you’ve seen before. That’s because Ahl al-Jabal are Nizari Ismaili Shiites and trust me when I say it is extremely accurate (minus the vampire hunting). Ismaili Gnosis is an excellent source for current events, history, and particularly metaphysics as it applies to Ismailis. 

Assassin Legends: The Assassin State of the Crusades is legendary, but what most people know about them is just that: legend. If you are using the Ahl al-Jabal, either in historical or modern chronicles, let Farhad Daftary bust the myths about the Nizari State for you. This link only gives you a preview on Google Books, so some pages will be missing, but it is still worth a read. 

Ama-San (Source) 

Oceanography- Exploring Earth’s Final Wilderness

Understanding Japan - A Cultural History 

Ascending Ones

History of Ancient Egypt

Ashwood Abbey

Wine Tasting - Sensory Techniques for Wine Analysis: Are you really part of the Abbey if you aren’t a wine connoisseur? 

Ave Minerva (Source)

The History of Rome Podcast 

Azusa Miko (Source)

Understanding Japan - A Cultural History 

Barrett Commission (Source)

Crash Course US Government & Politics 

The Bear Lodge (Source) 

Mountains 101

Bijin (Source)

Understanding Japan - A Cultural History 

The Cainite Heresy (Source)

Gnosticism - From Nag Hammadi to the Gospel of Judas

Lost Christianities 

Cheiron Group

Critical Business Skills for Success

Economic History of the World Since 1400

Division Six (Source)

Crash Course US Government & Politics: Division Six may not actually be a part of the US Government, but they sure think they are, so understanding how they think they fit in isn’t a bad idea. 

The Faithful of Shulpae (Source)

The Ancient Near East - History, Society, and Economy

Habibti Ma  (Source)

The United States and the Middle East - 1914 to 9/11

Hototogisu (Source)

Understanding Japan - A Cultural History 

The Hunt Club (Source)

Forensic History

Illuminated Brotherhood (Source)

Addiction and the Brain

The Addictive Brain

Drugs and the Brain

Keepers of the Source (Source)

Understanding the Mysteries of Human Behaviour

Keepers of the Weave (Source)

Indigenous Canada 

Knights of Saint Adrian (Source)

Why Evil Exists

Knights of Saint George (Source)

The History of Christianity

Les Mysteres (Source)

Crash Course Mythology 

Cultural Literacy for Religion

Great Mythologies of the World

Les Voyageurs (Source)

Indigenous Canada 

The Long Night

The Apocolypse - Controversies and Meanings in Western History

The History of Christianity

Lost Christianities 

The Loyalists of Thule

A History of Hitler’s Empire

World War II - A Military and Social History

The Lucifuge

Why Evil Exists

Maiden’s Blood Sisterhood (Source)

How to Become a Superstar Student

The Modern Political Tradition

Malleus Maleficarum

The History of Christianity

Lost Christianities 

Why Evil Exists

The Merrick Institute (Source)

Medical School for Everyone - Pediatric Grand Rounds 

Secrets to Sleep Science

Network Zero

Internet History, Technology, and Security

Night Watch (Source)

Why Evil Exists

Null Mysteriis

Animal Behaviour

Introduction to Forensics

Mountains 101 

Otodo (Source)

Understanding Japan - A Cultural History 

Why Evil Exists

The Promethean Brotherhood  (Source)

Decoding the Secrets of Egyptian Hieroglyphs

Greek 101

Latin 101

Miracles of Human Language - An Introduction to Linguistics 

The Story of Human Language

Protectors of the Light (Source)

Indigenous Canada 

The Reckoning (Source)

Heroes and Legends - The Most Influential Characters in Literature

The Scarlet Watch (Source)

History of the United States 2nd Edition

Task Force VALKYRIE

Crash Course US Government & Politics 

History of the United States 2nd Edition

World War II - A Military and Social History

Talbot Group (Source)

Psychological First Aid

The Union

Cities Are Back in Town - Urban Sociology

Utopia Now (Source)

Great Works of Utopian and Dystopian Literature

Vanguard Serial Crimes Unit (Source) 

Introduction to Forensics

The Vault: The FBI’s online archive of popular declassified documents. Lots of weird stuff, and the perfect source of inspiration for VSCU.

Yuri’s Group (Source)

De-Mystifying Mindfullness

Healing with the Arts

How Music Can Change Your Life

Dark Eras

Foundations of Eastern Civilization

History of Ancient Egypt

History of the United States 2nd Edition

Indigenous Canada

Understanding Japan - A Cultural History

Signature Settings

History of the United States 2nd Edition

Mage the Awakening

General

Addiction and the Brain: Mage 2e’s theme is “Addicted to Mysteries.” Understanding that addiction is a good place to start. 

The Addictive Brain

Ancient Philosophy - Aristotle & His Successors

Ancient Philosophy - Plato & His Predecessors: If there is one course on philosophy you take for Mage, it should probably be this one. At four lessons, this is a pretty quick one to complete. 

Gnosticism - From Nag Hammadi to the Gospel of Judas

Magic in the Middle Ages

Dark Eras

Great Zimbabwe in Historical Archaeology

History of Ancient Egypt

Introduction to Ancient Greek History

Politics and Long-Distance Trade in the Mwene Mutapa Empire

World War II - A Military and Social History

Signature Settings

Foundations of Eastern Civilization

History of the United States 2nd Edition

Hollywood: History, Industry, Art

Understanding Japan - A Cultural History

Mummy the Curse

General

Archaeology - An Introduction to the World’s Greatest Sites: Let’s go find some Relics!

History of Ancient Egypt

Introduction Ancient Egypt and Its Civilisation

Soul Beliefs 1 - Historical Foundations

Soul Beliefs 2 - Belief Systems

Soul Beliefs 3 - How Does It All End?

Dark Eras

The Early Middle Ages (284-1000)

Foundations of Eastern Civilization

The Great War

Great Zimbabwe in Historical Archaeology

Ottoman Empire

Politics and Long-Distance Trade in the Mwene Mutapa Empire

Signature Settings

The American Revolution

History of the United States 2nd Edition

Promethean the Created

General

Introduction to the Biology of Cancer

Understanding Cancer Metastasis

Dark Eras

African-American History: From Emancipation to the Present

Epidemics in Western Society since 1600

Signature Settings

Antarctica: From Geology to Human History

Foundations of Eastern Civilization

History of the United States 2nd Edition

National Geographic Polar Explorations: Follow the steps of Doctor Frankenstein. 

World War II - A Military and Social History

Understanding Japan - A Cultural History

Werewolf the Forsaken

General

Animal Behaviour

Dark Eras

African-American History: From Emancipation to the Present

The Ancient Near East - History, Society, and Economy

Cybele: The Great Mother of the Augustan Order

The Great War

Hardcore History - Punic Nightmares

The Early Middle Ages (284-1000)

History of the United States 2nd Edition

Signature Settings

The Civil War and Reconstruction Eras

Foundations of Eastern Civilization

History of the United States 2nd Edition

Mountains 101: An awesome course in general, but especially useful for Werewolf’s signature setting, the Colorado Rockies. 

Understanding Japan - A Cultural History

War for the Greater Middle East

Vampire the Requiem

General

Clans

Animal Behaviour

History of Ancient Egypt

Introduction Ancient Egypt and Its Civilisation

Carthian Movement

Circle of the Crone

Magic in the Middle Ages

Invictus

Lancea et Sanctum

Magic in the Middle Ages

Ordo Dracul

Ottoman Empire

Dark Eras

African-American History: From Emancipation to the Present

The Civil War and Reconstruction Eras

The Early Middle Ages (284-1000)

Epidemics in Western Society since 1600

The Great War

Living in the French Revolution and the Age of Napoleon

Ottoman Empire

Digital Tour of Tutor London

Signature Settings

Foundations of Eastern Civilization

History of the United States 2nd Edition

Introduction to Ancient Greek History

Understanding Japan - A Cultural History

[annaoposa]

We (re)built this city (Part 1 of 3: Athens)

I have been wanting to go to Greece because, well, we don’t really need reasons to go to Greece, do we? It’s known for its historical landmarks, cuisine, coasts, blue and white structures, Greek men gods… 

I didn’t have a grand let’s-see-all-of-Greece plan. I usually spend time booking tours and researching restaurants for a shape of a plan, but I didn’t do any of that because all my energy has been dedicated to work and fieldwork [1]. On one March evening, I made an impulse decision to book accommodations in three different islands via AirBnB and left that as my starting point for my annual soulbatical [2]. 

After the 10th anniversary of the Future for Nature Awards in Arnhem, I flew from Schipol to Athens via Aegean Airlines (€186.98 with 23 kg. baggage), and took the metro from the airport to the stop near the apartment (€10). My AirBnB host, Nick, met me at the stop, and together we walked to his place, where I would be staying for two nights. Since I arrived late afternoon, all the museums were closed, so I just walked to the restaurant that Nick recommended called Black Sheep and stuffed my face with this life-changing cheese dish and slow-cooked lamb. I generally don’t eat lamb, but ah, when in Greece. 

I scheduled only one full day in Athens because a couple of friends told me it was “overrated.” To maximize my day, I did my go-to tipid tip / traveling “hack” for any new destination: a free walking tour [3]. 

The walking tour started at the National Library, which used to hold the first copies of any book ever printed in Greece, as well as any publication that was related to Greece (ang lawak ng criteria!). Since it can no longer accommodate the increasing number of materials, they are now being moved to a new, 22,000-sqm building. We then walked to the Parliament, where our guide, Michael, discussed the current economic crisis. Greece’s unemployment rates are at an all-time high, and Transparency International named it the most corrupt country in the European Union in 2012 and 2013.   

The National Library

Next stops were Pláka, the pretty, touristy shopping district; Hadrian’s Library; Tower of Winds, and the ancient Agora. Michael informed us that most ruins can be viewed from the gates, and unless you pored over Greek literature and history and would appreciate every single Doric column (or what remains of it), it’s best to spend on any or all of the following: Agora, which closes at 3PM, the Acropolis, and/or Acropolis Museum, which both close at 5PM. We stopped by a viewpoint of the Acropolis, where Michael posed a question: is it better to reconstruct these ancient sites or leave them as they are? 

For him, they are better off as is to let people’s imagination work. I haven’t made up my mind yet, but I suppose an average tourist would appreciate a reconstructed structure more, instead of just slabs of marble on the ground, and perhaps appreciate history more?   

Or not :)) Up for discussion. 

The tour wrapped up by the Acropolis Museum at 2PM. I was starving, so I walked back to Pláka to eat a kebab and have a beer.   

While finding my way back to Acropolis, I stopped by a store to look for postcards. This is one of my absolute favorite things to do on a trip. 

According to the staff member on duty, the word on lower left means “yes!”, the lower right has no direct English translation, but it roughly means “friends for life” or “good friendship.” I hope she’s right, because I’m sending it to one of my best friends. Baka SOUVLAKI pala yung totoong meaning. Shet. 

I found the Acropolis and entered at around 4:15PM, forty-five minutes before closing time (€20). The word acropolis comes from akron, “highest point,” and polis, “city.” The Acropolis holds the Temple of Athena Nike and the Parthenon. The branding of Nike is so strong that I forget the brand was named after the Greek goddess for victory.

The Parthenon is being rebuilt with marble from the same site of the original structure. 

I was out 10 minutes before it closed, and walked up a couple of more viewpoints: one that overlooked Agora,

and another named Socrates’ Prison, which offered another view of the Acropolis.

Here, I wrote on the postcards and reflected on democracy and the concept of citizenship, two contributions of Athens to the world [4]. I read in A Little History of the World that people would vote for the most popular person... to be kicked out of Athens, i.e., “any politician who showed signs of becoming too popular, lest he seize power for himself and rule as a tyrant." 

Makes sense, huh?

The word "democracy” comes from dêmos, “people,” and krátos, "force" or “power” -- essentially, “rule of the people,” or as we know it, “people power.” People power is integral to our narrative as Filipinos. Democracy is the only form of government I grew up with, and it is messy. Our current situation is becoming increasingly frustrating: we’ve elected really, REALLY questionable politicians and fake news and alternative facts have become part of daily life. It’s democracy at work. But democracy at work also means the right and privilege to vote, which generations of women before me fought for. Democracy allows me to write letters to leaders and be openly critical of these leaders. It lets us stage protests. I’d take democracy over tyranny or communism, any day.

After my muni-muni moment in the middle of couples making out and men playing the guitar and singing Greek songs, I made my way back down layers of flowers and trees to the main roads. Since I have no sense of direction, I followed groups of friends walking their dogs (in the least creepy way possible, I swear). 

On my way back to the apartment (at this point my FitBit said I had already over 25,000 steps and my legs ached to prove it), I walked past the Panathenaic Stadium, the venue of first modern Olympic Games in 1896. Just right there, by the main road. It was a racecourse in c. 330 BC, rebuilt in 144 AD, excavated bit by bit from 1836 to 1869, and refurbished in 1896. It was also used in the 2004 Olympics. Isn’t that incredible? Full circle. Think of all the wins, losses, heartbreaks, and cheers (and nude male bodies, as the first track events were done without clothing) this stadium has seen and heard. 

Given the chance, I’d like to go back to Athens and spend two or three days. Turns out Athens isn’t overrated for someone like me who’s a nerd for history, art, and politics. One day wasn’t enough. Athens has been destroyed and rebuilt, war after war, and there are layers of stories beneath the Starbucks, H&M, and Sephora that line Ermou Street, and under the remains of Propylaia and Erechtheion. Someday.

Next stop: Naxos!

[1] I owe Fiesta Tours & Travel a big thank you for fixing my UK and Schengen visa appointments and requirements while I was traveling for work. I was only in Manila for about two weeks, collectively, from January-March and I was so worried I wouldn’t get my visas in time, but Ms. Eve, Ms. Anna Marie, and Ms. Jean of Fiesta Tours figured it out so I wouldn’t have to. Thank you. 

[2] “Soulbatical” is a term my best friend Claudine coined when I visited her in California in October 2015, after my MSc. “I’m soul-searching. Kind of like a sabbatical,” I told her. “A soulbatical!” she declared. So now I have an annual commitment to go on a soulbatical where I do as little work as possible and travel on my own. 

[3] Free walking tours don’t have a fixed price, but run on tips.

[4] This is what happens when you travel alone - ang daming time for rumination and contemplation.

[noisykate]

Cordoba and Granada

27 January 2017

They say ‘never start with an apology’, but this week of sightseeing has been so overwhelming to the senses, that any effort to summarise it is doomed to failure.  Not helped by finding the camera battery flat on day one, and no charger packed. D’oh. Ellen took loads of pictures, and these will follow, but in the meantime I include some links.

How to start? There is no point just rewriting the guide book, so I will just give a hint at what we got up to, and what it was like.

18 Jan    Ellen arrives Alicante.

Drive back to Cartagena through a blizzard. Ellen staying in hotel near the Naval museum.  Locals all very excited by worst weather conditions (ie first snow) since 1983.

19 Jan    Day set aside for sightseeing around Cartagena. Very, very cold, raining, snow on ground on hills. Marble walkways through town treacherously slippery. Sightseeing largely abandoned. Ellen still staying in hotel near Naval museum.

20 Jan    C&E set off for Cordoba. Five hour trip, stunning drive through the Sierra Nevada, snow on verges and covering the hills.  Slightly worrying conditions, but it was all fine.

Arrive Cordoba, hotel a 3m walkway away from the famous Mosque/Cathedral, in pedestrianised ‘no cars except authorised’ zone, which we drive through to park under the hotel. Armed police obviously not on traffic duty and not bothered.

Lovely hotel, the ‘Maimonides’.

21 Jan    Cordoba Mosque/Cathedral visit. Wow. Search for ‘Cordoba Cathedral images’ for better pictures than mine. (Ahem)

Mosque and cathedral both stunning, architecturally and historically of huge significance within Spain and on the wider political/religious stage. The rhythm of the repeating arch design of the mosque is disrupted by the imposition of the cathedral through the middle of the building, in an act which is generally regarded now as the most astonishing cultural vandalism.  Wikipedia says:

The insertion (of the cathedral into the mosque) was constructed by permission of Charles V, king of Castile and Aragon. However, when Charles V visited the completed cathedral he was displeased by the result and famously commented, "they have taken something unique in all the world and destroyed it to build something you can find in any city."

The church is itself is beautiful, introducing a shock of light and vertical space to the intimate gloom of the mosque, and contains amazing architectural detailing, most notably a vast and exquisitely carved choir stall construction.

The transition between Christian and Moorish control, which happened several times over the centuries, is presented within the building as an entirely orderly, peaceful and voluntary transaction. Seems unlikely….

The ‘Spanish Inquisition museum’ nearby boasts ‘six rooms of torture equipment as used by…’. Deeply nasty – the tone of it was horrible; titillating, prurient, pornographic. We skipped it in favour of some of the more uplifting offerings.

22 Jan    Cordoba Azahara palace https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Medina_Azahara  – ruins of a moorish palace outside Cordoba. Apparently this is one of the most extravagantly constructed and decorated palaces ever, almost entirely looted out over the centuries, leaving only enigmatic ruins. The visitor centre at the bottom of the hill is the only source of any information on the site.  The signage and visitor information at the site itself is quite astonishingly poor, the ruins capped and ‘reconstructed’ in places in modern times, leaving the visitor mostly just baffled.

 Nearby, there was a small mountainside settlement called ‘Las Ermitas’, a cluster of monastic cells around a beautiful little chapel, exuberantly decorated in the baroque style, in stark contrast to the asceticism of the monks’ cells. The last monks left in the late 50’s. A wonderfully peaceful and holy place.  http://www.cordoba24.info/english/html/ermitas.html The tranquil mood was broken slightly by the drive down, which saw Ellen, unused to being a passenger, struggling with the drive down the winding, narrow road. Hilarious.

Over the two-and-a-half days in Cordoba, we also visited:

·         Jewish quarter, http://www.andalucia.com/cities/cordoba/juderia.htm including a tiny synagogue. The jews were hounded out of Spain during the Spanish Inquisition, and almost all traces of them removed. This is allegedly one of only three old Synagogues on the Iberian peninsular.

·         Roman bridge,  http://www.andalucia.com/cities/cordoba/romanbridge.htm  awarded a prize by architects following highly controversial reworking in recent years, permanently removing roman paving and parapets to facilitate a new lighting scheme.

·         Huge riverbed; mostly now swamp and scrub with some large willow trees, navigable to here from the sea in ancient times. There is a modern pontoon on very long dolphin, so presumably there is some local traffic, and times when the river levels rise substantially.

·         Little townhouse; built, decorated and furnished in the Arabic style – fascinating to see how the bare bones of the architecture come alive when dressed for living, with bright tapestries and cushions, cooling plants and small fountains and pools full of cut flowers. http://www.lacasaandalusi.com  

The drive to Granada was again lovely, about two hours, mostly through olive and orange groves, the trees making wonderful patterns in the rolling hills.

23 Jan    Granada.

We stayed for three nights in the Hotel ‘Washington Irving’, named after the New York writer who stayed hereabouts while visiting the area to write his ‘Tales of the Alhambra’.

The hotel is quite posh, and very newly refurbished, with our guide book (originally published about 10 years ago) referring to the place as ‘derelict’. Unrecognisable as an ‘old’ building, it has been architected into an anonymous modern international hotel, with no trace of the quirky 19th century ambience the guidebook said we might glimpse through the barred broken glass doorway.  Our room was lovely, very glamorous and comfortable, the room itself reasonably priced, although their priorities require some tweaks – there was a wonderfully ridiculous ‘pillow menu’, from which you can choose (and I quote) “…to enjoy your dreams in a different way…” reclining on an “Audrey Hepburn” or “James Dean”, or perhaps “for our younger guests” – a “Mickey Mouse” – but nowhere to hang a dressing gown while you shower.

The hotel is currently let down by a comical food offering; Ellen’s main course arrived looking more like a tapas, with two very tiny cutlets of pork perched in the middle of a huge plate decorated with a drizzle of some pretty goo. We waited for the dish of vegetables to arrive, but no, that was it – beautiful and tasty, but hugely overpriced, and just not enough to eat.

On checking out, we intended to let them know what we thought of their food, but they forgot to charge us for parking the car (18Euro per day) so we said nothing and legged it.

24 Jan    Alhambra.

To say anything about the Alhambra is to select, leave out, and struggle for descriptive superlatives. There are endless websites.

It is a complex of buildings within a high protective and defensive curtainwall on top of a hill; constructed and reconstructed, destroyed and restored over the centuries of its existence, for a wide range of motives. The brilliantly readable guidebook by Robert Irwin advised that almost everything we think we know about the place is wrong, with the truth of its original design now lost, the function and flow of the rooms further obscured by fantasy/myth/legend and poor historical archaeology, compounded by well-intentioned ‘restoration’ over time, and the need to pass many thousands of tourists through the place as fast as possible.

It is impossible to be ‘objective’ about the place; the scale of it, and its very foreign-ness, demands that we try and make sense of it, and we can only do that within the framework of our own life and experiences. Poverty and excess, power and subjugation, religious conviction and political duplicity – it is all here, confusing and enigmatic.

The Rasmid Palace is utterly beautiful, tiled with complex tessellated patterns and decorative plasterwork, the proportions of the buildings and their adornment all according to Pythagorean mathematical rules including ‘the golden ratio’. Paradoxically, much of the Alhambra has survived because it was made using ‘poor’ materials (wood, plaster, ceramic tiles), with virtually no intrinsic value and hence not worth looting.

The Palace of Carlos V, built in the centre of the complex, probably on the foundations of earlier Moorish buildings, is a striking square building in massive stone, with a circular courtyard, completely out of keeping with the rest of the compound. It now houses a museum, and art galleries.

The Generalife is a separate, much smaller, more domestic-scaled complex slightly further up the hill, with a wonderful garden.

The entire Alhambra complex is irrigated by an sophisticated arrangement of aqueducts and underground pipework, feeding fountains and pools as well as kitchen and ornamental gardens.

Ellen retired for a siesta, while I took in the Generalife, and later the steep footpath down between the Alhambra compound and the Generalife, to the Albaicin.

The setting of the Alhambra is stunning, with views down over the Albaicin area, a maze of tiny lanes around white-painted red-tiled buildings in the Moorish style, mostly built around little courtyards. The lower lanes are chaotic and colourful with market traders selling Moorish lanterns, textiles and leather goods.

In the other direction, the Sierra Nevada towers over the valley, the high snowfields catching the low winter sun.

The only significant irritation was the jostle of (mostly but not exclusively Japanese) tourists with bloody selfie-sticks, their backs to the sublime scenery and architecture, gurning and pouting at their cameras. During the busy season later in the year this must be a real joy. Do they ever actually look at the pictures they take? And when they do, what do they see?

25th Jan We spent the day in recovery, drifting into the town mid-morning, wandering around slightly aimlessly, drifting into a random art exhibition of photographs -of all things- the 9/11 attacks in New York, a very personal event for Ellen, who lost some close friends that day. We sat for an hour watching a sort of slide show of stunning and horrifying pictures, talking about it.

Lunch was a coffee and a shared pizza at a café in a square. A small group of young men at a nearby table were very striking, simply because their faces were so like those we had seen in the 15th century paintings in the Carlos V museum. Their modern clothes seemed like costumes, their ‘real’ clothes somewhere piled just out of sight, perhaps with their pikestaffs and standards leaning against a nearby wall. A very odd experience.  Ellen says that this rarely happens in the States, where the many mixed immigrant populations have homogenised over the generations.

The Albaicin deserved another visit, and we spent a couple of hours wandering up and down the little lanes, peering through gateway railings, framing the view of the Alhambra with another alignment of lanes, the Sierra Nevada above.

The Royal Chapel of Isabella and Ferdinand (aka Mr and Mrs Spanish Inquisition) nearby boasts two of the most enormous sideboards I have ever seen, each about 8m long, and the most gaudy and stupendous baroque altarpiece, depicting the martyrdom of several saints in gloriously grotesque and fully detailed technicolour.  For me, the very common Spanish-flavoured focus on suffering as a religious journey here ceased to be a meditation on the human condition, and stepped over the bounds of decency to become voyeuristic sadism, perhaps because of the close association of the place with Ferdinand and Isabella. They do not come across as nice people.

26th Jan Drive back to Cartagena, through the wonderful Sierra Nevada.Tapas in our usual bar.

27th Jan Ellen home, driven to the airport for 10am. Collapse in heap, write this, shopping, tv, bed.

Ellen promises to share her wonderful photos when she gets back, so I will post a selection when I get them.

It has been a wonderful few days; the places themselves, and stimulating company, talking a lot about everything.

Even with so many riveting distractions, it was difficult not to keep returning to the Trump question – sorry Ellen, I really don’t hold you personally responsible, but he is just SO bizarre. But also, in the context of so much historical excess and madness, he fits right in.

[healthysnacks12-blog1]

Trump's opportunity to do the business of his life

For years you have told us that you are a teacher to negotiate. Well, it was time to do the business of your life. The time has come to negotiate your resignation.

We know that you will negotiate firmly, but people are exhausted, and there is a good chance that you can reach a good agreement to end this stage. The number of Americans who support his removal is increasing rapidly. Many would probably welcome their departure. Isn't this the best time to negotiate?

Almost three years after your election, most Americans have not been convinced of its greatness, beyond the frequency with which you mention it. However, perhaps he could still negotiate immunity for all the crimes he may or may not have committed as president, in exchange for his return to private life.

The former president of the Trump organization, Barbara Res, says she thinks you could resign rather than face possible removal from office. Who would want to end the presidency with forced removal? That would be a total shame; One of your favorite words.

Instead, you could go out on your own terms and return to your first love: real estate.

You could declare that Americans simply don't deserve it, that it was your country's fault. You can blame the so-called State within the State, if you want. Say you don't want to waste your precious time in a process of divisive political judgment; then blame the Democrats. If you are a really good negotiator, you could sign an immunity agreement that guarantees that you will not be prosecuted. Then he will not recognize anything and will say that he resigned selflessly, to save the country. In that case, history may have a greater predisposition to consider its vision of history.

You have told us that being president costs you a fortune, as much as $ 5,000 million. Experts say their figure is absurd, but what do they know? Have you not lost enough money, time, dignity?

Imagine all that you would earn by leaving office today: and we are not talking only about all the money you say you are losing. Most importantly, think about what would be avoided. Also, read this https://www.houstonchronicle.com/life/article/What-Nixon-said-to-Trump-that-night-in-Houston-14838943.php#photo-18617817.

The next few weeks of the political trial investigation will be appalling for you and the nation.

Now it is said that a second informant about his actions towards Ukraine is coming to light. And while you insist that there was no quid pro quo, your own envoys to Ukraine have revealed condemnatory messages that rightly suggest that: Bill Taylor, the senior US diplomat in Ukraine, wrote to the US ambassador to the European Union Gordon Sunland: “ I think it's crazy to retain security assistance to get help with a political campaign. ”

And the investigation is just beginning.

Democrats will do everything possible to display the most condemnatory material they can find and the media will be relentless in their the t to get the information you have tried to keep hidden.

Imagine: if that call with the president of Ukraine (the one you now say was "perfect") was enough to trigger an investigation of political judgment, what will happen when less "perfect" details of his the residency is made public? No doubt he will take many of his secrets to the grave, but you can be sure that many others will come to light.

So far you seem to have been immune to humiliation and shame so far, but that could change.

Gradually, the people who have worked for you have started talking. Perhaps most of his loyal supporters will remain silent, but there are early signs of cracks. Former Republican senator Jeff Flake said that if the vote were private, at least 35 Republican senators would support the political trial process against you.

But even if Republican officials remain submissive, you have not yet been spared. Imagine how many government employees and private friends of yours know about their misdeeds. Most of the people employed by The government do not wear MAGA hats, “let's do the US great once again.”

They have kept their heads down and remained focused on their jobs, even when many were horrified by their thousands of lives, there insults against US allies, their policy of separating families from undocumented immigrants and their defense of neo-Nazis. They know it could take a generation or more to restore the good name of the United States in the world.

Most people alone are not heroes, but courage is contagious. How many US officials, who have remained silent so far, will finally decide that it has been enough? How many will decide that they don't want to enable a president who has launched a campaign, like yours in Ukraine, to undermine the US intelligence community. And invite a foreign country to interfere in American democracy?

There is a reason why the informant learned from the US officials worried that you had pressured the president of Ukraine to help weaken Joe Biden's presidential campaign.

What will happen if a more complete transcript of that call to Ukraine is published? After all, the reconstruction of the White House of the 30-minute phone call could reflect only part of the conversation, as Senator Angus King and others have pointed out. And we know that White House officials who locked up the full transcript of Ukraine's call have locked up other conversations. What could Americans find out about their talks with Russian President Vladimir Putin and Saudi Crown Prince Mohammed bin Salman?

This will follow. And he will catch some of his top confidants. People are already talking about whether the Secretary of State, Mike Pompano, the Secretary of Justice, William Barr, and his personal lawyer, Rudy Giuliani, have committed crimes related to efforts to find the dirty traps of their political opponents (potential offenses that they deny). What would happen if they reached an agreement with Congress before you, for the exchange of information against you in exchange for clemency?

The sooner you leave, the better your chances of displaying your mastery of the art of trading. It will give you the chance to build your narrative, to think a really good story about why you left.

To be honest, many of us, let's say, have failed to impress us with their negotiation skills since he took office as president. It would seem that North Korea is taking away its business (and the US); there is no agreement with Iran, nor with China and no immigration agreement with Congress.

Maybe I can prove that we were wrong; maybe you are a great negotiator.

You could announce that you have decided to resign for the good of the country. He could pretend that he does not want to see the country divided by a long process of political trial, and he could stop warning about the consequences similar to the civil war if he is removed from office, or call his critic's traitors.

This is your chance. It could be the business of your life. If you play the cards well, the first paragraph of your obituary would describe you as the man who negotiated a historic resignation agreement to save the nation, rather than as the president who was subjected to political trial and perhaps sentenced and removed from his position and - it cannot be ruled out - that he then faced punishment.