#plus sometimes a fanfic needs a several year hiatus

[kaitoukye]

Frustration with the current selfish state of fandom and also my original projects aside, my fanfic output is definitely slowing to a trickle, maybe even a halt, cause how can I think of silly guys in interesting situations when inflation and money worries are kicking my ass. The 1987 AU and any other story you may be waiting for is on hold/very very slow updates until the world unfucks its shit which will probably never happen. Also its *just fanfiction* Its kinda pointless to make it a priority when society is literally crumbling.

[lokisasylum]

Tag for Fanfic Writers

(this was supposed to be an Ask Game, but I don’t have the patience to sit and wait for someone to interact/write me one of 50 questions to my inbox. So I’ll just answer them myself LOL)

1. What fandoms do you write for?

Currently only for BTS

2. What pairings do you write for?

Jikook, Yoonmin, VMin & VMINKOOK.

3. What is your most popular fanfic?

“Lunatic High” for some reason... its a fantasy au. Has to do with a war that broke out following the assassination of the Emperor, where humans began hunting werewolves after accusing them of conspiring against the monarchy. So you have Taehyung, Namjoon, Hoseok and Jeongguk as survivors of this war and living as bounty hunters, but one day when Taehyung falls gravely ill and no remedy can cure his disease. The four of them have to journey south where a surviving pack of werewolves live and may be the only ones who can save him. But it is Taehyung himself who holds the biggest secret of them all.

I haven’t updated it in two years and it only needs the final chapter TT

4. Do you write original stories as well?

I used to have this one original story that I spent MANY years plotting and finally began writing in 2009, but after I reached the 32th chapter I left it on permanent Hiatus.

5. What fanfic of yours should everyone have read?

I would like to recommend “All or Nothing”, “Yoongi’s Confession” and “Forever You Said”.

6. What is a fandom you will never write for?

NEVER AGAIN for Death Note that fandom was hella toxic back in the day. I also wouldn’t write for Dragon Ball z (and all the versions of it) I just can’t envision the ships correctly XD

7. What is a ship you will never write for?

Tae//kook sorry no offense to the members themselves... but their crazy, toxic, obsessed fans made me hate the ship. Also the fics I’ve read of this ship are just as toxic and Jimin is always somehow hurt in them. So NOPE. The only way I would come close to writing anything with them is if it involves VMINKOOK as end game.

8. Archive of Our Own, FanFiction.net, Wattpad, Tumblr, etc. which platform do you prefer?

Archive of Our Own all the way. I used to have a FF.net account many years ago but never really uploaded anything to it. Never did liked wattpad’s format and Tumblr isn’t exactly a practical place to read fics plus you have to manually link chapters.

9. What are your favorite fanfics?

Oh wow I’ve read so many good ones... “Surreptitious” (by Bangtanbananas), “bitchin’ witchin’“ (by spookysuga), “forever was never till now” (by SpringonMars) and “The Devil’s Cut”

10. How do you stay motivated to finish what you’ve started?

I cry on the floor, go through several breakdowns and then stare blankly at my word doc forcing my brain to work.

11. What’s your longest fanfic?

“Lunatic High” with 16-17 chapters.

12. Do you want to break your readers‘ heart or make them laugh?

13. What is your planning process?

I try to write little snippets whenever they come to mind no matter what I’m doing. So I always try to keep my phone close by and my Notes ready for any plot bunny that may run by.

14. What have others criticized about your fanfic?

I’ve honestly never gotten “criticized” per say or negative comments. Though I do get that sometimes my readers can be a bit impatient 🤭 but I get that since I can be impatient too.

15. OCs or no OCs?

No OCs as main characters, only supporting if I run out of people.

16. Do you use sentence starters, writing prompts and/or fandom headcanons for your fanfics?

I try a bit of everything if it helps the ideas flow.

17. Do you use/follow advice from writing blogs/posts?

I try to, but don’t let it influence my writing too much.

18. What is your favorite writing prompt?

Strangers to Lovers, most Alternative Universes

19. Dead or overused tropes?

omg, the freaking “school sweet heart who falls in love with the asshole”, the whole “first time/loosing their virginity” trope (how many times is the same character gonna loose their V-Card in 500 universes?!), also any mafia trope. 

20. Can we get a list of all of your current available fanfics?

I have like 19 of them. So I’ll just provide the link to them HERE.

21. What’s your shortest fanfic?

“You’re My Tear/You’re My Fear” (944 words) which is a song-fic with the song “TEAR” by BTS.

22. Do you listen to music during your writing process? What music do you listen to while you’re writing?

Hmm I have like 49 or 50 playlists/mixtapes. All from different genres but when I’m writing a particular story I listen to my Release Radar or New Releases and like the songs I think would fit to that story. So many of my fics have their own mixtape ^^

23.Long chapters or short chapters?

I always start a new fic thinking “this will only be a oneshot” and then chapter 2 and 3 happens...

24. How many WIPs (work-in-progress) do you’ve got?

......like 10...

25. How many WIPs will you finish?

3-4 because I finally have a solid plot for them.

26. First-person-narrative or third-person-narrative?

Both, both are good.

27. Do you take requests?

I used to when I had nothing to write about but some requests.... can be a little intimidating.

28. I will name you three things (object — scenario — fandom/ship): write a paragraph or two!

29. What’s more difficult? Fanfics or original work?

Original works.

30. What writing software do you use?

Nothing fancy, just Word Doc. & Notes.

31. Do you use beta/sensitivity readers?

No.

32. Past or present tense?

Both

33. Do friends and family know that you write fanfics?

Friends... and said friends don’t know me IRL lol

34. How did you find the magical world of fanfics?

I was 9yr and into the anime YuYu Hakusho, so I was browsing the internet for images about Kurama and Hiei cause they were my fave characters and stumbled into this blog that someone had and she had this story “Wild Winds”, I read it thinking it was some spoiler to the series and I remember that the story was kind of sad because Kurama had killed his human body and was going back to his Yohko Kurama self and Hiei held him in his arms through the process. At the end Kurama and Hiei kiss but it was out of defiance because they knew they didnt have much time left because they were found out. I legit thought this would or had happened in the series, but the author explained to me that it was made up by her and I found that so fascinating.

35. What is your favorite review?

This one is still a personal fave that I keep close to my heart:

36. Did you ever delete a work of yours?

From my current fanfics? No, but I did deleted old ones from my deviantart page because years later as I grew more mature I realized how childish a lot of my writing was back then.

37. Did your work ever get plagiarized?

Ahh... that’s an old wound that’s tough to re-open. Because it didn’t happen with my fanfics but it DID happened with that original story I mentioned. And the one who plagiarized it was a long time follower of mine on DA, I even considered her a friend. She used MY story for a contest she made up at a Death Note fan club she had and never told me. I found out because another follower was a member in that club so she asked me about it. What hurt the most is that when I called her out in private and asked her to delete my story from her contest she made this post ON THE CLUB saying I was accusing her of being a disgusting thief and wanted to ruin the contest, so this ended up with her 300+ club members harassing me and sending me death threats. I think that’s one of the reasons I quit writing that story half way.

38.Do you partake in any fanfic/writing events? (Big bangs, zines, NaNoWriMo, etc?)

I’ve thought about it? But most of these contest take place on Twitter which I don’t have an account to and most of Army twitter is well... hella toxic. Especially now with fanfic writers getting harassed/bullied into deleting their accounts and called “fetishizers” by fake woke kpoppies who enjoy listening to fake moan videos and reading Y/N/self-insert fics about being r*ped by their 7 mafia husbands. 😒 (I said what I said)

39. Collaborations or working solo?

I enjoy working solo for now. I like working at my own pace.

40. Do you have any rituals before uploading a fic?

Yes! I freak out, obsessively go over each word and sentence to make sure no typos are in sight, drink two cups of black coffee, have a mental break down, get distracted by tumblr or animal videos on youtube, dissociate for half an hour and finally upload the fic at 6:00AM ^^ then have another meltdown the next day after I find ONE typo I missed 😂😂😂😂😂

41. What is something you don’t like about your writing?

That it doesn’t come out when I want/need it to or the way I have it figured out inside my head.

42. Rudest review?

lol okay so this wasn’t really a “rude” review, but there was this one girl who left very strange comments on every chapter of “Forever You Said” while talking in 3rd person. Its like she was running her own self-insert fic while reading mine. Thankfully she deleted her account.

43. Guilty pleasure tropes and scenarios?

Guilty pleasure tropes... hmm.. I’m a sucker for vampire x werewolf relationships since its considered a “forbidden love” and how they eventually work it out. Also the “Enemies to Lovers” tropes is an all time fave especially when the love happens in a way you never expected it. 

44. Does fanart of your fanfic exist?

I.. as far as I’m concerned I’m the only ones who makes fanart/companion art of my fics 😅😌 I have yet to see a single fanart of any of them....

45. Do fanfics of your fanfic exist?

I don’t think so? But if there are I would like to read them! Just as long as the person didn’t do it out of spite because they didn’t like the pairing/ship I wrote about.

46. Few long essay reviews or many short reviews?

I enjoy both! But the long ones are more fun to read because you get an in depth pov of what your readers liked/disliked about the story.

47. What fanfic of yours is truly underrated?

I feel like maybe “Sin For You” underrated. Its my first vmin fic and second fic I wrote/published.

48. What is your favorite sentence that you’ve used in a fanfic?

Ah there’s SO MANY... but the ones closest to my heart are:

#01. "Someone once said that when you finally learn to love… really learn to love, you won’t need to give up on anything; Not your friends, your family or your hopes and dreams. Because Love is supposed to add up, no take away.” He drew in a shaky breath. “But if that’s true, then why are we so afraid of what we might lose?–” [Jimin to JK, “All or Nothing”]

#02. “Most fairy-tales make you believe that there is such a thing as “Forever”, but in reality kingdoms fall, buildings turn to ruble, words fade, bodies decay and turn to dust. Nothing ever lasts.Not even love.“ [Jimin, “Forever You Said”]

49. Where do you draw inspiration from?

Music mainly, especially from composers like Peter Gundry, Zack Hemsey & Adrien von Ziegler.  Secondly since I am a History & Art major I enjoy doing research about topics of my liking to incorporate in the stories (for example: I had to do A LOT of research for “Forever You Said” regarding Joseon Dynasty, how the world kept changing up until World War I & II era. )

50. Can we get a teaser for an upcoming chapter?

Sure! This is from a Yoonmin oneshot I’ve been working on:

“He hated remembering those things—those days where he could only be happy not as himself.  Not as Min Yoongi, but as Agust-D.

Agust-D who lived on the edge; where the days and nights passed between cigarette butts, cheap drinks, fast cars, running from the cops, tattered curtains in a motel room somewhere, long roads and even longer nights. Anyone brave or dumb enough to mingle in his world would either come out a stronger man or die a coward trying to run from it without realizing that it was already too late to back out. Which is why only a literal handful of individuals made it till the bitter end of the journey and lived to tell about it.  Though not without a heavy price to pay. “

[stories-forthe-void]

Summer Nights and Pool Fights~ Lee Minho

This is the town that I based the landscape off. It’s kind of important to the descriptions. Also, I, ’m sorry for writing so many stories about the beach but it’s where I’ve grown up so my mind kind of goes there when I need a quick setting. Anyways enjoy the fic ^^. Also I promise to make this all look nicer when I get back from hiatus. Only 9 days this time!

My fingers felt like they were going to fall off and my brain was being fried within my skull from the hours I had spent trying to sight read a 17/8 time signature. Join the state orchestra, they said. It'll be fun. Fun my foot. I'd spent all day sitting in one of my college’s music rooms practising for a massive concert next month and I still couldn't get the last few bars of the flute solo down.

 It’s not that hard Y/N.

I know OK just go away I need to concentrate.

She’ll kick you out if you don’t get it down by next week Y/N.

I get it Ok! I’m trying just-

 “Y/N?” Then the door rattled. Dammit, Minho. You always pick the perfect time to make an entrance. I tried to ignore the banging on the door. “Y/N, I know you’re in there. Open the door.” He rattled the door again. “Please, your mom gave me some of her lasagnas to bring you!” I was at the door in seconds and unlocking it before he could say anything more.

 You lost to pasta again Y/N.

 “Y/N-”

 “Shh, no speaking, now where’s the pasta?” I held out my hand.

 “I knew that would work. Here,” he handed me a Tupperware full of my mom’s famous lasagna. I swear they should make like a black market where children can sell their mother’s cooking. I could make millions!

 “Now would you like to explain why you haven’t come out of this room the whole weekend? Seriously you know there are better places to practice than on campus, right? Like why would you willingly come back here?” He gave me a typical Minho face that said: really Y/N? You could be spending your weekends with your amazing best friend, but no you prioritize your metal tube over me. Oh, the horror!

 “I have my reasons!” I exclaimed, hitting him on the shoulder.

 “Name three decent ones.”

 “Alright, reason one: they have aircon in here and my fan messes with the sound waves.” He shot me another typical Minho look. ”I'm serious! It's a legitimate problem in the flautist community!”

 “Alright, alright, kind of I believe you. Now, two more reasons. Come on.”

 “I, um, yeah, um, ok! Stop looking at me like that. The concert is next month Minho! Did expect me to just sit and do nothing?” I exclaimed

 “No, I don't, but I do expect you to instil some basic self-care! You can't just lock yourself in a music room all long weekend from dusk till dawn and then every afternoon after class. You need a break. Believe me, I need one too. We have a competition next week but I don’t lock myself in the practice room! So, please let me take you out of this horribly decorated room and do something fun with your best friend.” It's not that I didn't want to it was just that I couldn't. I was new in the orchestra. I still wasn't technically an official member, which meant Mrs Walsh could kick me out whenever she wished.

 “Minho I can’t -”

 “Y/N I get it. You're scared. I mean I would be too with a conductor like Mrs Walsh, but you are one of the best flautists I know.”

 “I'm the only flautist you know” I deadpanned.

 “That's beside the point. You need a break.”

 “Okay let's say I agree to this madness. What are we going to do? It's not like we can just take a drive to some magical island in the middle of nowhere.”

 “Oh Y/N, you severely underestimate my connections.” There it was. That was the Minho smile. The very reason I walked up to him on the first day of high school, right after the English teacher found at least 15 paper aeroplanes stuck to the ceiling with increasingly cringy quotes from fanfic.

 “Don’t look at me like that. It makes me nervous!”

“Minho where are we going?!” He had dragged me back to my dorm, made me pack a bag and on top of that insist I leave my flute behind. “Ok no. I’m being serious where are we going. My room mate will kill me if I just run off to some random mountain reserve with a boy.”

 “Calm your farm Y/N. I talked to Yasmin and she said it was fine. We’re going on an adolescent adventure. You’ll look back on this weekend and think ‘wow how did I manage a whole weekend without hooking up with my drop-dead gorgeous best friend’” I punched him in the shoulder.

“Excuse me young one! That is the second time in the past two hours! Ugh, the disrespect for elders in today’s society. Honestly its horrendous” He said it in the most ridiculous British grandmother voice and I honestly would’ve loved to have laughed, but he didn’t need that sort of ego boost right now.

 “You are two months older than me! Come on let’s get going I don’t want to get to wherever we’re going at like midnight.” I picked up my backpack and a duffel bag full of clothes for the weekend and pushed him through the door.

 “Alright, alright, I’m going.” And then we were through the door and in his car. He started the engine and so began the two-hour road trip filled with musical classics such as Gee, Ring Ding Dong and of course Wolf.

“Minho, oh my god this place is amazing! What millionaire cousin are you hiding from me?” I walked through the front door right into the lounge which opened up onto a massive deck with the most beautiful infinity pool I had ever seen. The deck looked out onto the main beach down below. It was decorated in that classic beach house décor that was probably way older than both of us, but it was still gorgeous. The kitchen was small but had a coffee machine. Perfect, I can drag Minho out to watch the sunrise tomorrow morning and he won’t complain.

 The garden and downstairs were pretty spacious but upstairs was much smaller. The house was probably designed with an “all day at the beach then entertain all night and only use the bedrooms for sleep” kind of vibe. The first bedroom was obviously for kids, bunk bed, no aircon, barely any shelving space and was basically being used as a surfboard storeroom. Not. An. Option.

 Please let there be two more bedrooms, please.

 It’s not like I haven’t slept in friends beds before, but Minho was a different story. That smile wasn’t the only thing that drew me towards him on that fateful first day of high school. Can you judge me though? He was an attractive new guy who had just transferred from a school in South Korea. He was an amazing dancer and he could sing. He was any band nerd’s dream. So I may or may not have a massive crush on my best friend...

 I pushed back the thought and continued through the house. I had no idea where Mino was but he could manage ten minutes without burning a house down… hopefully.

 The next room was just a bathroom and the next a storeroom. Who needs that many beach balls? Then at the end of the hall was the main bedroom. Dammit looks like I’m sleeping on the floor.

“Y/N where are you?” Minho shouted from what sounded like the bottom of the stairs.

 “I’m up here,” and a few seconds later he was by your side throwing you a smirk. “Oh, fluff of. I bet Yasmin didn’t agree with this part of the trip.”

 “No, no she didn’t. I didn’t think it was important. Besides, I’ll just sleep on the floor it's fine.” He went to go pull a mattress off one of the bunk bed, but I caught the back of his shirt.

 “Nope, no way. There is no way I am letting you sleep on the floor.” He began to object “Uh uh, no buts, this one’s not negotiable.” And that was that. He knew by now that there was no arguing with me, not unless he wanted to be left to walk to class alone for a week. So he agreed but sulked about it the whole time we were unpacking the car.

 “So, what are going to do for food tonight?” I asked as we sat down on the grass next to the pool.

 “I don’t know. We could go down to the restaurant by the beach. The service is terrible but the food and the view make up for it. Unless you want to go down to the store to buy food and actually make dinner?” The house was on top of a hill that overlooked the beach below. The view was amazing. The lagoon mouth was open and although it was getting late there were still children playing in the granny pool beside it.

 “You know Minho, I’ve been coming here my whole life and I’ve never noticed this house before. We usually stay right down there near the main beach. The house has been in my family for ages.” The question at hand had drifted from my mind as I sat in awe of the small town’s beauty in the fading sunlight.

 “Well, this is actually my elder cousin’s house. He said I could use it whenever I want when I got to college, so last year I got a spare set of keys made and I come here with Jisung and Felix sometimes. But I did ask you about food.” He let out a soft chuckle. I pulled myself out of my trance and looked at him.

 “Oh, right. Sorry I completely forgot. It’s just so beautiful here.” We both started out at the ocean again.

 “Ok stop distracting me from the question! Are you trying to starve me Y/N?”

 “Ok yes. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. Um, I don’t really feel like cooking if that’s OK with you? Plus I haven’t seen this place in a while and the beach is calling me.” It really was and I couldn’t wait until tomorrow to get there.

 “Ok, that’s fine. We can go now then!’’

We got to the restaurant and ate a casual dinner, nothing too fancy, and then we got some drinks and headed to the rocks on the side of the lagoon mouth. It was pretty cold at night during this time of year so we sat close to keep warm. It wasn’t unusual for us, but the dark and the beach and everything just made it feel weird.

We sat like that, in the dark, arms touching, looking out at the inky water and the reflection of the moon in it, for a while. We didn’t say anything and yet thousands of words were spoken in silence; without as much as a glance at each other.

It was weird to pull ourselves out of that silence, but we did it and were now walking down the, or rather up the hill to get back to the house.

You know Y/N you really are that idiot. The one thing we promised ourselves we wouldn’t do was to fall in love with the best friend. Now, look. You are completely and utterly whipped. No going back now. So what’s the plan? Are you going to confess in some stuttering mess of a sentence in some dark, ding music room or are you going to keep this from him for forever and die an old crazy cat lady with sixteen cats named Gerrald, Richard Parker, Isabelle-

 “So Y/N what’s the plan for tomorrow?” He nudged my shoulder lightly and pulled me from my thoughts.

 “Um, I don’t know. What do you feel like doing? I mean there’s not much else to do than go to the beach is there?” We got to the top of the hill and stopped to catch our breath.

 “Well there’s a waterpark like half an hour away or an amazing waffle place in the next town, but beach sounds good for the first day. The waterpark will be packed anyways.” We started walking again as it started to get colder.

 “Yeah, that sounds great.” I thought about it for a second and then added in my best Disney villain voice: “On one condition.” He almost looked nervous for a second but then slapped on a cocky grin before I could even remember what his face had looked like before.

 “Name anything; this weekend is for you.” Two could play at that game.

 “Ok then, I’m waking you up at six thirty tomorrow to go watch the sunrise.” Now he looked nervous again.

 “I mean um well. Come on Y/N we’ve been best friends for years is this really a necessity?”

 “Yes, Minho it very much is and I will drag you down this hill tomorrow morning if I have to. Thank you for a nice evening but I will now shower and then retire to the floor.” I let out a laugh and then started walking up the stairs.

 “You know you’ll have to deal with me the minute you get out the shower right.” He laughed with me as he started following me up the stairs.

 “Yes Minho, I do in fact realise that, but the fact that I have to see you does not mean I have to listen to you complain about a six thirty wake up call. Honestly, it’s not that bad you lazy ass.” I closed the bathroom door and locked it behind me. I wasn’t trying to be mean; I was just trying to have fun, but I’m bad at working out the difference so…

It was midnight and the floor was cold.

Why he thought that coming to the beach in the middle of autumn was a good idea, I might never know.

At least we haven’t said anything stupid in at least an hour Y/N.

I’ve been asleep!

Yes but we can say stupid things in our sleep Y/N.

Ok no, not listening to you anymore. Goodnight.

It was now half past one. The floor was still cold.

Unless we plan on getting a cold Y/N, we have one option.

What can a cold do to me, come on?

It can turn into a chest infection and then a lung infection and then wow look Y/N can’t play the flute anymore and oh look again we’ve been kicked out the orchestra.

Shut up.

One option Y/N, one option…

 I went to go shake Minho awake. Giving in to the voice in my head was something I was trying to get better at but it still didn’t work that well… most of the time.

 “Come on Minho please wake up!” He was usually a light sleeper, but he was probably doing this just to spit me. “Lee Minho I know you’re awake.” I waited a minute and then gave in to his plan that I knew was most definitely churning in that stupid, amazing brain of his. “Fine, ok, the floor is cold. Please, can I sleep with you?” He smirked but kept his eyes closed. “Not like that you pervert!”

 He stirred, opened his eyes and then sat up and said: “Ya sure. I knew you’d give in eventually. No one can resist this face.” He smirked at me again and batted his eyelashes.

 “Oh, would you shut up and move over.” I wanted it to come out a bit sterner, but I ended up laughing as he pouted at me and scooted so he wasn’t hogging the entire bed to himself. I turned to look at him and, in the most loving tone I could muster for one am, said: “Goodnight idiot.”

 “Goodnight my bestest most loving friend forever.” We both burst out laughing (even though it was a pretty terrible joke) and fell asleep just like that, heads nearly touching but not. Toes tangled by instinct to keep warm. My heart wouldn’t calm down. I thought I might have a heart attack in my sleep. To anyone else (including me) it would have looked romantic. I secretly hoped Minho thought so too.

 My internal clock woke me up at six. I had gotten used to waking up to practice and then going straight to lectures and then going straight back to practice.

 I was about to sit up when I noticed it. Minho’s arm slung over my waist and his head ever so slightly snuggled into my side. I got such a shock when I saw it that I jolted. He started to wake up and I started to panic.

 Oh we’ve really done it now haven’t we Y/N.

You’re not helping!

Hwta are we going to do about this Y/N.

I don’t know! You’re meant to be the logical one.

I’m just a voice in your head. How am I meant to be logical Y/N?

You’re the one always shouting at me!

No, we’re always the ones shouting at us.

What the hell is that supposed to mean!

To late Y/N

“Mm Y/N?” Oh god.

We spent the day at the beach, eating chips and drinking whatever was cheapest. We messed around in the water and read on the sand, but something was always a bit off.

 “I’m sorry about this morning Y/N. I don’t know what happened.” We were walking down to a different beach to go watch the sunset. I had compromised with Minho after this morning’s antics.

 “It’s fine Minho, it was cold. Body heat you know?” I let out a nervous laugh and looked over at him. It was fairly light out, as the sun was just starting to disappear under the horizon. I didn’t know if it was a trick of the early morning sun or if that was actually a blush I saw dusted on his cheeks. “Minho seriously, we’re friends it doesn’t matter. Come on stop looking so embarrassed. If anything it should be me blushing I mean I was the one-”

 “I am not blushing!” He whipped his head towards me and glared.

 “Ok sure mister ladies man.” It was like a whole different person. Minho was never like this. He was always the loud cocky one at the college parties, flirting with all the girls and then passing out on my couch after one to many jager bombs.

 Today he was like a teenage boy going through puberty who had a crush on his older sister’s best friend.

 He likes us back Y/N

Not with you in my head he doesn’t.

Stop denying that you wouldn’t be a functioning human without me Y/N.

Fuck off I’m trying to enjoy the sunset!

Don’t screw it up Y/N.

 We both froze the minute we got out the dune forest and onto the sand.

 “Omg Y/N! It’s beautiful.” He was right. The sun was halfway under the horizon and had turned the few clouds in the sky the most breathtaking shade of pink.

 “Ok who are you and what have you done with my best friend.” It was both weird and strangely endearing to see Minho so excited about a sunrise.

 “What’s so wrong with a guy liking the sky.” I chuckled.

 You’re whipped Y/N.

Since when did you use stan language?

Since when did we start using stan language Y/N?

Oh, shut up!

 “There’s nothing wrong with a guy liking the sky. I just never pinned you for a sky guy.”

 “Y/N I am shocked, I am such a sky guy.”

 “Ok, no more sky guying. Come on let’s sit down” We both laughed together and as we sat laughing on the sand I realised that this had been the most constantly happy I had been all year.

 Don’t screw it up Y/N

 “Oh, would you shut up!” I immediately clasped my hand over my mouth. Minho looked at me with a look that was somewhere between completely shocked and hurt. “Minho I’m so sorry I didn’t mean to say it out loud. Oh, wait no that’s not what I meant. Um… I’m sorry I was just. I um, I-”

 I told you not to screw it up Y/N

 I could feel tears starting to form in the corners of my eyes. Minho was still looking at me with that face. I couldn’t speak.

 Why now! It was going well! You ruin everything.

Not me, us. It’s not my voice Y/N

 I broke down. I was so sick of this stupid voice in my head and now look what it had done. Why couldn’t I just turn it off? Why did it have to-

 I felt arms wrapping around me and pulling me into someone’s chest.

 “Shh, it’s ok Y/N. You’re ok.” I didn’t understand why he was always so selfless. Behind that stupid ego of his, he was just my best friend.

 I don’t know how long we sat on the beach like that. The sun ha set and it was dark outside by the time I lifted my head from his chest and tried to speak but he stopped me.

 “Before you make some bullshit excuse and say you’re fine, you’re not and you are going to tell me what’s going on in that brain of yours because I am tired of seeing the person I love suffer.”

 See look it’s-

 “Please just be quiet,” I whispered into Minho’s chest once again.

 “Y/N please tell me what’s going on. You’re really starting to scare me.” I looked back up at him and the worry in his eyes had my heart crumbling into dust.

 “I just- I don’t know Minho. I just can’t get it to be quiet and it ruins everything.” He looked scared. I hated it, but I didn’t know how to explain it.

 “What won’t be quite Y/N?” I pointed to my head. Realization washed over his face, then understanding and lastly sadness.

 “What does it say” It was barely a whisper. I shook my head. I didn’t want to say it aloud. It made it seem too real. It already at too much power over me, it didn’t need this.

 “Please, can we just go home Minho? I’m fine. I dealt with this since like Grade 8 and I’ll deal with it some more. Just please can we go home.” I hated sounding this needy, but I didn’t want to talk about this now or ever. It was something I dealt with by myself or not at all. Minho did not need to be dragged into this.

 “Y/N I can’t just-”

 “Yes you can Minho and you will. We’re not talking about this. Not in the dark on a beach. Maybe somewhere else and in the far future but please, please can we just go home.” He slumped and gave in. He stood up and bent is legs and gestured with his head as if to say hurry up and get on. I’d didn’t I just looked at him, confused.

 “What? Come on I have to be a good friend in some way tonight. Get on.” And so I did. It was weird but not in a bad way. I felt like a kid. It was…nice?

He somehow carried me all the way home, even up that godforsaken hill. We got inside the house, after fumbling with the keys and giggling for a good five minutes, but he didn’t stop there. He ran through the lounge, me still on his back, and opened the sliding door. He headed towards the pool.

 “Minho what are you doing!” He liked back at me and smirked. He put me down and I made to run but he caught the belt loops on my shorts. “Minho seriously what are you- ah!” He had picked me up in his arms and was carrying me towards the pool. “Lee Minho I swear on my flute’s well being if you dare!” He dangled me over the pool.

 “Are you going to talk yet?” I didn’t say anything. I just glared at him and in return, he loosened his grip on me.

 “Minho stop!” I clung on to him.

 “Talk or swim Y/N, the choice is yours.” He shook me as if he was trying to emphasise his point.

 “Minho, you can’t be serious!” He didn’t look at me only at the pool which was dangerously close to my legs. I realised how he was holding me and a blush crawled up my cheeks.

 Just admit it to him already Y/N.

Not now!

He knows about me now; no point in hiding it Y/N.

Oh, shut up.

 “I am being dead serious Y/N. Talk or swim!” I tried to splutter out anything to try to change my mind but all that came out was an incoherent babble.

 “You chose…wrong!” And with that, he threw me in the pool. The perfectly heated water enveloped me as I felt all my clothes get wet. Thank God for beach holidays where the taking off your costume isn’t an option. I took off my wet top and pants and threw them on the side of the pool.

 I came up to take a breath and saw Minho take off his shirt and bolt towards the pool. He canon-balled into the pool; nearly landing on me in the process.  He disappeared in the inky dark of the water, none of the pool lights were on, I mean we didn’t exactly plan on using the pool other than to wash off the sand.

 “Minho, where did you go?” I couldn’t tell if my laugh was out of nervousness or joy. It was so weird. Maybe half an hour ago I was sobbing into his chest trying to keep this stupid thing out my head and now here we were, just stupid kids again. The same Minho who would contemplate the art teachers seeming immortality is the same Minho who had gathered me in his arms and just been there. The same Minho who convinced me to flirt with the lunch lady was the same Minho-

 “Ahhh!” He had come up underneath me, grabbed my legs and launched me in the air. “What the hell was that for!?” I tried to stare him down but he just laughed.

 “Because I think you needed to smile.” He grinned at me, so I splashed him. He splashed back. And so began a five-minute wrestling match. I won, but I think he would have disagreed.

 “Ok, ok,” He puffed out, he looked out of breath, “Now tell me what was going on with you back at the beach.” He had swum right up close to me.

 “Minho do we have to talk about this right now? Can’t we just be two friends in a pool on a spur of the moment holiday?” His face contorted.

 Ughhhhhh, what have I said this time.

 “Is that all I am to you Y/N, a friend?” I had no idea what he was asking. Was he implying something? Or was he just being Minho?

 “I don’t know what you mean Minho.”

 “I mean what I said. Is that all I am to you and am I really that bad at trying to show you that I might want more?” Ok, so he was impling something. Oh my god, he was implying something.

 “WH-what?” I spluttered out.

 “I like you OK Y/N? And I hate seeing you like this; beating yourself down when you’re the most talented, most amazing, most beautiful human I know!”

 “Minho, I, um, I- I just don’t know what. Oh screw it!” It was now or never. I knew I’d never get a chanc like that again so I just, kissed him. And it felt freaking amazing.

  Let’s just say Mrs Walsh was very surprised at how well I played at the concert.

[airbender-dacyon]

So… if you’re new to my blog, this is a pretty common occurrence, unfortunately.  I tend to be regularly active for a short stretch of time and then go radio silent for weeks or months on end.  It’s never intentional and I always say something like this when I get back from a hiatus – I apologize for being away and not taking care of things like I needed to.  It can be as simple as answering an ask or messaging a friend – and all of you have the patience of saints, especially @kristallioness – or taking care of things for Kataang Week.  Things that should rightly take only a few minutes – or maybe twenty-thirty minutes of my day or even of my week – if I could focus long enough to take care of them. 

I guess this is just going to be a flow of consciousness sort of thing.  We’ll see if it makes any sense at the end. 

I started grad school a few months ago and combined with everything else this year (work/family stresses, losing two close relatives, etc.), my life has felt like hell.  There’s been the good parts – grad school is going alright, I’m learning, I’m furthering my experience and knowledge within my field, I’ve made plenty of friends and gotten to grow a bit as a person.  But there’s been plenty of the bad, too – I lose at least 10 hours a week just to my commutes, bills are stacking up, I feel wholly unprepared/unqualified for working in my field, stress/depression is snowballing (this is probably the biggest cause of everything), etc.  Typical things in life that I must learn to handle better.

The tumblr/fandom stress hasn’t helped.  I see blogs, people I used to talk to become totally inactive or disappear completely.  Some blogs I’ve seen get deleted without warning, thanks to tumblr itself. Fanfics and fan art have been disappearing for some time now and it all just breaks my heart.  Not just losing the conversations I’ve had with these amazing people, but all the memories and all the contributions to the fandoms.  I believe we put a part of ourselves in everything we create, so when anything we make is lost, it can cut us – and the people we have touched through our art – deeper than we might expect it to. 

Plus, for the last few months, with everything in my real life going on, fandom has felt a lot like a chore.  I can’t remember if I’ve said this before or not, but that’s what it felt like.  I hate that that’s what it felt like, but it’s the truth.  And unfortunately, it gets relegated to the bottom of the chore pile – least importance.  And when something feels like a chore, you don’t want to do it. 

I’m used to stress as a student.  Grad school just intensified that a lot.  However, I’m not used to the stress of being an instructor. The catch to my getting into grad school was that I had to do it through an assistant-ship.  So, its not just concern for my grades and my well-being, but for all the students I teach as well.  Because if I as a student miss a class, all I have to worry about is making up the work later on.  If I as a teacher miss a class, the students fall behind in their work and I am in trouble (if I couldn’t find a substitute in time).  To me, it’s been more stressful than a standard job – I have to force myself to make it to school for the sake of the students.  (Somehow I’ve not missed a day yet.)  Don’t get me wrong, I want to be there, too, but it just feels as though all the stress from this year (past several years, probably, if I’m being honest) just continues to grow and grow and I’m afraid it’s going to burst at the worst possible moment. 

And my advisor and other students keep encouraging me, praising me, telling me how great I’m doing.  (Especially in comparison to the person who preceded me, who apparently set the bar very, very low.)  And this makes me feel as if I’m just going to fail even more.  I feel as if they’re all building me up into something I’m not and when I crumble, they’re going to realize they picked the wrong guy for the job. 

At the same time, that stress makes me more motivated to succeed.  I need to work through it, to understand it, in order to do better.  I’m sure many of you know what this is like personally. It sucks.  But its necessary to move forward in life.  Because it will always be a part of us and we need to learn how to deal with it. 

So, I’m done with making excuses and apologies. I think you are all more understanding of my situation than I am.  Life happens and its unavoidable.  From what some of you have told me, you have lives far more stressful than mine and yet you manage to not only remain involved in fandom, you thrive in it.  I wish I could as well. 

I’m not promising I’ll be on here more consistently.  But I’m going to make a hell of a lot stronger effort to try.  I’m planning to at least check in once a week – something I’m sure I’ve promised before.

I don’t really know if any of this is making sense.  It’s ~1:30 AM here in little rural Ohio and my brain is fried from teaching, studying, and Season 3 of The Dragon Prince.  So I’m also running on the absolute hype that came from TDP.  I guess I’m just trying to channel all my energy into semi-coherent thoughts to explain things about life that seem somewhat revelatory to my sleep deprived mind but are really things we all know already. 

Speaking of Dragon Prince, I’ll probably be posting major spoilery stuff from Season 3 for like the next several weeks to forever.  Because reasons.  It was amazing.

The more I put things off, the more it stresses me out.  It’s that simple.  All the things weighing over my head just continue to grow because I keep putting them off.  And the only way I’m going to change it is if I can face the problems head on.  I have to relearn the mindset I lost 7-8 years ago when I could always remain on top of my work and my hobbies. 

So, I think I’m going to go work on a message for some people in the Dragon Prince fandom and then maybe use the energy I have left to get working on a story I’ve had for some time.  And then we’ll see where that takes me. 

Since I’ll inevitably crash within the next hour or so, my plan for when I wake up is to get my grading done (bleh) and then focus on finally taking care of the submissions from Kataang Week when it ended like 3 months ago.  And answer asks/messages sometime this weekend.  Preferably tomorrow, er, later today.  I don’t want to take on too much at once, but at the same time, I need to take care of things or the weight of it all will just continue to grow. 

Thank you, if you’ve taken the time to read this. I hope to talk to you all soon. You are all wonderful friends and followers that I am eternally grateful to have in my life and I love you all for putting up with my shenanigans.

- Dan

[kinetic-elaboration]

Blog Summary Tag Game

Find your fandom kru and help them find you. Answer the following and include the tag #the100blog in your answer. Tag some blogs you follow.

@johnmurphysreddit came up with this idea and @thelittlefanpire tagged me! I think this is a great idea!

1. What are your primary topics?

Within The 100: Bellarke, the delinquents generally, and the Sky People even more generally; I mostly focus on the first three seasons. Bellarke is my main ship but I like other relationships and characters too, including Jonty, Briller, Mackson, Bartender Mechanic, Princess Mechanic, Braven, Octaven, Jaya, Murven--just off the top of my head. I'm a huge fan of rare pairs!

I also blog about non-T100 stuff, including other fandoms/media, art, photography, travel, etc.

2. What tag should a visitor check?

I'm a consistent and fairly thorough tagger, and I have a (slightly outdated) tags page linked on the right sidebar. I tag all TV shows and movies by name and for The 100, I also tag characters and pairings. Pairings other than Bellarke are tagged using first name x first name, not by ship name.

All original content is tagged #mine. Most of that is fanfic, which is also tagged #my writing. Occasionally, I make moodboards, tagged #my moodboards.

I have a (fairly new) #fic reblog tag for fic I've read and a #fic rec tag for particular favorites.

I'm not negative on main very often, but I do have a tag (#the 100 negativity) for blacklisting purposes. I use the tag for both original posts and reblogs. But to give an idea of how frequently this comes up, the last post tagged as negative is from 4 months ago, and the last original negative post from 7 months ago. I also use the tags #spoilers and #[show] spoilers for several days after any sort of new content airs.

3. What do you love about the 100?

The number and variety of interesting and intriguing characters and the fascinating settings and early-seasons concepts. I can't say I've always gotten on board with some of the plots of recent seasons, but I stay in the fandom in large part because the universe is so inspirational from a transformative works standpoint. In other words, I like being part of a fandom because I like writing and reading fanfic and enjoying other creative works based on the original media, and T100 is a great fandom from that perspective. I don't just love one or two characters, I love a dozen, and I don't just have one pairing I care about, I could read and write and play around with... I don't even know how many different combinations of characters. That the friendships and family relationships are just as compelling as the romantic and potentially romantic ones is a definite plus.

Did I mention I love rare pairs?? I do.

I also feel like watching this show and being involved in this fandom has given me a greater appreciation for nature and the Earth. I guess that sounds sappy and/or weird but it's definitely true.

Also, I really feel like The 100's set and costume departments are criminally underrated. Have they won all the awards yet? The sets in particular are so consistently amazing and detailed, I am in awe.

4. What do you hate/frustrates you most about the 100?

*cracks knuckles* Time to make some enemies lol.

No, honestly, I have plenty of things I like to rant about, but I do it offline; you won't find most of it here. That said... I actually stopped watching the show itself when I found out that Jasper had died. I really can't explain or over-emphasize how much that death messed me up, or how upset I was or still am about it. Not even to go into how abjectly irresponsible and disgusting it was.

Even then, though, I thought I'd take a break, catch up over the hiatus, and come back for S5. Then I found out that the season had ended with some characters going into space and a 6 year time jump and I... just kind of didn't care anymore, to be honest. Nothing from then on has been of interest to me: the aged-up characters, their "kids," the reshuffled relationships, the new characters, the increasingly bizarre Lore, and especially the destruction of Earth and the move to the new planet. Just not for me, sorry.

I have a lot of other comparatively nitpicky complaints but for the most part, cutting ties with the canon has actually been very freeing for me. I have no reason to focus on or even give the time of day to any aspect of the show, old or new, that I don't like. So I don't. (An extensive blacklist, following only people with a good tagging system, and some degree of personal self-control also help.)

5. Is this an exclusively the 100 blog?

It is not. This is my main blog so really it's just a large, curated collection of Stuff I Like.

I run a small queue (3 posts/day), which I fill with a lot of photography, art, cats, books, tea, and the occasional fandom post. When I'm actually online, and especially when I'm writing and need some inspiration, I reblog The 100-related things, or other fandom/media stuff. I'm sort of multi-fandom, but not really.

6. What else should people know?

I'm as shy and awkward online as I am in real life, but still consider myself a friendly person! I love talking about writing--it's my main hobby and I spend so much time thinking about it, it's probably Too Much. I also (I think I've said this lol) love talking about/reading/writing rare pairs.

I like being tagged in things, including fics and other creations--I should warn that I'm a slow reader but I will get around to reading and commenting on all the fic in my bookmarks, I swear.

Most of the blogs I follow currently are pretty Bellarke-centric, which is fine, but I'm always low-key looking for blogs that focus on a greater variety of characters/ships, especially the delinquents.

I'm usually taking requests for short pieces of writing and sometimes for longer works, too.

Indiscriminately tagging the blogs I follow; I'm sure a lot of you have already been tagged, but I'm just going with this list:

@grumpybell @hostagetakerandhisgirlfriend @sneakyclarke @griffndors @selflessbellamy @skaifayax @beautiful-rebellious-sunflower @bellamybb @hedajohnmurphy @jasperjoordan @marvelscaptainss @octannibal-blake @linctavias @ms-mojo-risin71 @chants-de-lune @bellofthesky @onlyhereforbellarke @raven-reyes-of-sunshine

Eta: some additional people I follow because I guess I can’t read:

@pawprinterfanfic @hopewolves @clarkgriffon @the-most-beautiful-broom @eyessharpweaponshot @musicnote902

[todokori-kun]

(Random but I think your reply was a little later than normal? Was it the internet again? Anyway it’s nice to be talking with you again queen :D

Also just in case you didn’t get the other messages I sent (I sent them a few days ago so I guess tumblr ate them again), I was basically trying to say that the CP aesthetics are gorgeous and that I found the real Hamilton’s last letter to Eliza and was wondering if you’d like to see it too if you haven’t already. I think I was also trying to ask if you got the new pics I sent you)

EXCUSE me how is it even possible to not be impressed with Hamilton (ok, ok, so I guess you’d be pretty unimpressed with Alex after Say No To This…but ELIZA. ANGELICA. AND PEGGY. WASHINGMACHINE. And of course the entire hecking cast is awesome). At least they acknowledged the Frenchfryette…

(jk, jk, we all have different tastes so I guess even Hamilton might not be the right thing for some people ^^)

HE AIMS HIS PISTOL AT THE SKY-

“WAIT!”

(Burr. You should know by now that the whole ‘talk less, smile more’ and ‘wait for it’ theme doesn’t really work out for you most of the time. It’s certainly not gonna stop a bullet you already fired ;-;)

According to my parents I was a really bubbly, well-mannered kid who never whined or threw tantrums…but, BUT, I was as much of an airhead then as I am now, and I ended up causing a lot of trouble XD Other than the bathroom flooding incident, once when I was tiny my mom left me playing in the hall while she was making dinner. When she came to check on me I’d turned one of the walls into a piece of modern art (like Carnage Kabuto did to Genos, only better/worse). With permanent markers.

And once when I was even younger, mom woke up to a strange sound coming from outside the bedroom, and she realized I wasn’t in bed with her. She found me in the living room, plucking the rocks out of a plant pot and rolling them across the floor like marbles.

I also remember that I had a habit of doodling all over my arms and legs and cutting up my pajamas to make them look 'cool’. Literally any time I rolled up my pants you’d see giant, brightly colored marker lines/dots/swirls all over my legs, and all of my pajama shirts and pants were starting to fall apart because I kept snipping at them (I remember grabbing my craft scissors and hiding behind the sofa to redesign my clothes in peace without my parents seeing and being all “Evans, those are for cutting PAPER, not your clothes” lol).

I was a weird kid.

You’re right- at the place where they finally got the thing out, I think the doctor just had me lie down and got it out with pincers(?). No pain, no blood, it was over pretty quickly. I do think I remember being told that the heel of the shoe had gotten buried in the inside of my nose, though, and that was why it was so difficult to get out…

As for the nosebleed, idek. I remember some people holding this blue, rubbery pump-thing to my nose and trying to get the shoe out with that??? And then blood just suddenly started pouring from my nose? LOL it didn’t hurt, though, and there’s always the chance that it had nothing to do with the shoe. I got a lot of random nosebleeds as a kid, I’d literally just get up in the middle of the night, decide I needed to go wipe my nose because it felt runny, then turn on the light to see blood plastered all over my nose and around my mouth…I probably looked like something out of a horror movie XD

I RELATE TO THAT. There are still a few toys I’m super attached to even if I don’t play with them anymore, and I get sorta…upset?…when people touch them the wrong way (also my dad keeps talking about how we need to throw some of the old dolls away soon and I haaate it ;-;).

Yeah, that particular kid (let’s call her Friend A) is a bit of a brat lol. She smacks her own mother when she’s upset and screams her head off whenever she doesn’t get her way. It’s pretty uncomfortable to watch because her mom never really does anything about it…

(also, some context for the kicking: the boy she kicked (let’s call him Friend B) has been friends with my little sister for a few years now so they’re closer with each other than they are with Friend A. But Friend A got upset about that and came to the grown ups to tell on them; everyone tried to calm her down and suggested that maybe she should try asking them nicely, but she ended up throwing a tantrum. So Friend B’s grandma jokingly said that if Friend B kept being rude to her she could just fight back, give him a punch (she was laughing while saying it, so even to a kid it should have been pretty obvious she was joking).

After we found out what Friend A had done and tried to talk to her about it, she was like 'his grandma told me I could so I did it.’ and refused to apologize.)

OH NO. IS THIS ANOTHER ONE OF THE DREADFUL FANDOMS WHERE YOUR OTP NEVER, eVEr, HAPPENS?! That settles it, I’m never watching or reading Fairy Tail 0.0

Well, sure, most mangas have at least one hiatus at some point…but HxH is on a whole different level. The hiatuses are LEGENDARY.

just imagine what would happen if a manga artist tried to keep up with Ishida’s TG schedule (one chapter every single week except on holidays). An artist who apparently has no assistants. An older artist who has health problems. Tbh you can’t really be upset with HxH for the hiatuses…but it’s still a really, REALLY long wait whenever it happens, and sometimes it goes right back on hiatus barely a few months after the last hiatus ended ;-; I’m lucky I joined the fandom so late (and right after the hiatus ended, too! :D) but I can’t be sure when it’s going to happen again..

Ok, ok, so in case you haven’t searched what Feitan looks like he is LITERALLY Levi. The narrow eyes. The murderous stare of disinterest. The hair.

Then there’s absolute loyalty to a leader. Levi ->Erwin, Feitan-> Chrollo (Chrollo=manipulative spider thief who actually managed to troll HISOKA, of all people). Feitan is also one of the stronger characters as far as I know, and he’s just as blunt and rude and Levi. And he’s a thief; Levi used to be a thug.

Also, also- Levi=160cm. Feitan= 155cm.

Feitan is Evil Levi. Actually, maybe Thug Levi could have turned out like Feitan if he never met Erwin…that’s a scary thought 0.0

(as for Hisoka and Saitama, well. Hisoka realizes that even his Nen (his special power), Bungee Gum, has absolutely no affect on Saitama. He proceeds to Schwing. Very hard.)

(I doubt I’ll ever be over Old Man Fu because Iiked him a lot ;-;)

Saitama is my fav tbh, though Genos comes close..and from what I know about Metal Bat, he’s also a really cool dude. (Also I love Amai Mask/Sweet mask. I love to hate on him.) I like Sonic, but I can’t take him seriously most of the time because he feels like a parody of Sasuke from Naruto (also I keep thinking of Sonic the Hedgehog lol)…his smile is adorable though :3

I’m neutral towards Tatsumaki because her powers are super cool and I like her design but her attitude is a bit annoying to me. Still, I think I read that she’s gotten more development and backstory in the manga/webcomic, so I’ll wait until I can catch up with canon :)

OH NO. Apparently Bert’s death can still hurt me even after all that’s happened since then (also AoT’s new chapter hit me straight in the Annie/Bertl feels. I guess it’s basically one-sided canon now).

YES. I’m seriously so hyped for Ragnarok. I’m just as hyped for the fanfic as I am for the actual movie. And the FANDOM. Can’t wait to see what tumblr’s gonna be like when the Loki fans realize their king has returned XD

I can’t drop TG because there are too many things I want to see/know (like the whole deal with Kimi and Kanou, what’s going to happen with the whole Human vs. Ghoul thing in the end, what’s going to happen to the Touken kid, if Kaneki will live, if Shuu will ever actually get angry at Kaneki, the OEK’s true identity, Eto’s return…). And SPOILERS FOR NEW CHAPTER

after this chapter I definitely can’t stop until we see how Urie gets out of this situation (plus I sense character development/backstory/reveal time, which is always cool). Maybe I should be scared for Urie but I’m still not that worried. Death cliffhangers in TG almost never come true, and like I said, Urie just CAN’T die now when his character arc is nowhere near finished.

But I totally get your frustration, queen.

I’m probably gonna play it tomorrow :D I’ll let you know when I do!

Yep, I know what happens in his bad end. I don’t want play it XD

I did play Fritz’s bad end a few days ago, though. WHY DID YOU HAVE TO SAY GOODBYE VARG

I ship Queen Luna with too many people and I don’t even care

(DON’T YOU DARE WRITE MORE FRITZ HCs THOUGH, PLEASE. HAVE MERCY. IT’S TOO FLUFFY FOR ME TO HANDLE)

Also: I have a game to recommend! :D If you haven’t played it already, The Blind Griffin by Asphodel Quartet is awesome. I downloaded it from Itch.io :) it’s set in America, in the 1920s. The MC is looking for a job and happens to stumble into a speakeasy run by magicians.

Review so far:

pros:

-great MC! She has a fun personality- not the flat heroine most Otome games have, but not a super cold Ice Queen type either. I really liked her.

-Diverse cast! From the main cast there’s the MC, who’s Chinese-American, Vivienne, who’s African-American, Alexei, who’s Russian, Giovanni, who’s Italian, and Emilio, who’s Spanish. Then Marie, who’s transgender, and her gender identity is handled very well! Also a lot of different body types and facial features.

-Lovable characters. I didn’t expect to like everyone so much but there is literally nobody in the main cast that I dislike. I thought I wouldn’t enjoy Giovanni’s route after I played Alex’s and decided he was my fav, but turns out I was wrong. Gio was great too.

-everything is quite realistic and fits well with the setting. There’s even a glossary for slang.

-Art and music are gorgeous

-several different endings! I’ve only played the romance routes so far but I think there’s a friendship ending as well as a sad ending for each character. The romances were really sweet so I can’t wait to see what happens with the other routes!

Cons:

-it was made for NaNoReNo, so the story does feel a little rushed because of the time limit and the game is really short ;-; it feels like there should have been more but they just didn’t have time to finish the story.

-not a lot of choices.

And random note: do you know, I actually wanted to make an Otome Game myself a while back. I had some plot, choices, routes and characters all planned out and even downloaded a program to try and teach myself how to make a game…but then I realized I suck at it and it was just too much for me to handle on my own XD I’ve been working on the ideas I had for that game though- mostly the characters, I’ve thought of a lot of Love Interests ;) maybe someday I could actually make this work as a collab with someone else when I’m older…for now I think I might try writing down the script and drawing some more concept art for the characters because I have too many ideas and I need to let them out LOL

I’M ALIVE. The internet was absolute shit, yay. Sorry about the long wait OTL

Aaah, right, I got those, I just noticed them after posting ^^;;; They were buried in the asks from my other blogs ^^:::: Thanks a lot about the aesthetic compliments! I’m glad you liked them! I definitely enjoyed making them ^^ And wow, the feels ;-; Best of Wives and Best of Women.

The drawings you sent me are gorgeous!! Dead Fish Eyes Family tho XD

The thing is, from the start, even before we reached My Shot, they were like ‘meh’. But I still forced them to listen anyway muhahahahaha HOW COULD THEY NOT LIKE THE SCHUYLER SISTERS? THE ABSOLUTE QUEENS??? I am disappointed in them T^T

I STRIKE HIM RIGHT BETWEEN HIS RIBS I WALK TOWARDS HIM, BUT I AM USHERED AWAY THEY ROW HIM BACK ACROSS THE HUDSON I GET A DRINK

((I’m writing those lyrics while listening to one of the most happy songs I know XD))

I’m guessing Burr needed a real life lesson about bullets and their negative effects on humans, especially if they’re fired at someone else. Welp, hopefully he knows now.

We were opposite as kids XD My parents once decided to make a small experiment. They told me to sit down and stay like that for as long as I could. Then, they started measuring how long it took me to start fidgeting, then how long until I stood up and ran somewhere. Barely a minute before fidgeting, a bit more than 3 until I stood up and ran away. I wasn’t joking when I said everyone thought I had ADHD.

Thankfully, I knew the consequences of drawing on walls well enough from my sister’s example (I still remember how mad my mom was when she found out she’d been writing an walls) to do anything, but for some reason, I always broke everything I touched. I was not to be trusted with the dishes and if anyone got me a snow globe (which was surprisingly often), it wouldn’t last a month unless it was placed on the highest shelf, out of my reach. Even then, I would still manage to break it sooner or later.

((Random, but my playlist is on shuffle and just played 98% of my Christmas songs, one after other. I am slightly worried XD (even tho I sang along)))

I didn’t do it to my clothes, but I had a knack for redesigning barbie clothes/hairstyles/makeup. And my sister would usually help, despite being 6 years older XD She was always so artistic, she even sewed some clothes for them! They were actually pretty good, despite her being 10-12 yo.

To be honest, I’m fascinated. I am genuinely fascinated. Partly at the fact that the shoe managed to get buried in the inside of your nose, partly at how much fuss you went through to get it out XD  I think I would’ve cried regardless of pain or not, had I gotten a nosebleed as a kid. I just couldn’t stand blood (still can’t tbh)

I’m slowly running out of space on my shelves, because I keep adding new books there, and yet I never move any of the trinkets or toys that are there. My mom keeps insisting we at least move some stuff to the basement, not throw it out, but I never give in XD I mean, I’m very happy with how the whole thing looks right now, and it would be empty without the stuff. For some reason, I have no problems with dolls now, but plush toys and small figurines are what get to me… For example, horses have always been among my favourite animals, so I have a shitton of horse toys, and they honestly take up a lot of space, and yet I feel like I’d be betraying my hobby (horse riding) by throwing them away ;-; Until I have no more space for books, I’m not moving anything XD (unfortunately, that’s gonna be very soon, even now I always have to move stuff around a lot to fit them in)

Wow. Well, I’m gonna be a stiff and say ‘Kids these days…’ Im only halfway joking. I went to visit my old elementary school last year and, boy, did the first years (7yo) annoy me. Now, I was a brat, but I wasn’t a brat with a smartphone who didn’t socialise with others at all. And my old teacher told me stories of their parents… I’m slowly changing my mind about wanting to be a chemistry professor in the future XD I think imma just be a researcher. Thing is, parents aren’t strict enough. True, my mom was a bit too strict, but one of the girls I went to elementary school has parents who always let her do anything she wanted, and even when they grounded her, they’d ‘un-ground’ her half an hour later. And guess how she turned out! Today, she smokes (cigarets and weed), goes out at least 4 times a week and gets wasted every time, I don’t even want to start on her grades and, most of all, she’s an ungrateful brat who’s used to getting everything she wants. Life’s gonna be fun for her. 

YES, YES IT IS. I mean, in the last chapter, almost all of them were heavily implied, one of them even had an actual love confession a few chapters back, but nothing was said in the last chap, except for this:

WHAT’S THAT SUPPOSED TO MEAN??? THIS IS MY 2nd ULTIMATE OTP IN THE SHOW; WHAT THE FUUUUU

AND THEN THERE WAS ANOTHER ONE, WHERE BOTH OF THEM DIED IN THE MANGA, BUT THEY WERE THERE IN THE LAST CHAP, APPARENTLY AS REINCARNATIONS??

BUT MY OTP. THE SHIP I CARED ABOUT SINCE DAY 1. THE ONE I SHIPPED FOR AS LONG AS I’VE BEEN READING THE MANGA (which is, admittedly, quite long, I’d say more than a year and a half) IT WAS THE MOST ??? ONE.  OKay, here’s the story: He’s originally a bad guy, but he was manipulated, so he repented of his sins, did some good shit and was still locked in a prison. Then, there was  a huge war arc and he was freaking helpful and did a lot of good stuff, so now, in the end, he was pardoned. AND THE LAST CHAP; HERE’S WHAT WE FIND OUT: HE WAS PARDONED; AND EVER SINCE,  SHE’D BEEN DOING HER HAIR EVERY DAY (implying she’s happy or seeing him, I guess???) AAAAA I’m lowkey debating posting the entire last chap here for you to read, even without context, just so you can see how much it’s only implication and nothing real (;_;)

Ouch… Well, I’ll have to think about it then ^^

Tbh I can’t imagine Levi with Feitan’s hair. It’s too messy XD

Ahahahahahah Idk if I’ll ever get over Schwing, despite not watching/reading the manga…  Schwing.

I think most of Metal Bat’s personality comes through in the manga, because he has a few omake in the manga, where he goes to strenuous lengths to protect/keep his sister pure. It’s adorable, really. His sis is a bit of a brat tho. Amai mask. I can not stand that guy. 

Oh yes, the beautiful, murderous smile. You can practically hear the panties dropping.

I still have 15ish chaps till I’m caught up w the manga, but both she and her sis have very… interesting personalities XD Im pretty sure she’s like that on purpose, though, to bring more humour into the manga (as if it needed that XD)

AoT Will keep hurting me as long as it can. Basically, until I either drop it or until it ends. 

Oh, you don’t think they’ve realised yet? From the amount of gifs I’ve seen, I’d say the fangirls are very well informed XD 

Oh joy… Please keep me updated XD And come screaming if Urie does die, cause I gotta read that for myself XDDD

OYAOYAOYA SO HAVE YOU PERHAPS STARTED WALTZ??

Ahah, I warned you… I still wanna cry when I think of Varg. #stillnotoverit

huehuehueheuhueheuheuheuehueheuheuheuehuehueheue ill spare you for now. no telling what comes in the future tho~

Alrighty, i’ll check it out ^^ it seems interesting enough!

Oh, yeah, I forgot to add, but I’m trying to start a love live dance cover group here in Zagreb! It’s harder than you think =3= It seems like I’m the only one who likes the show. Hopefully, I manage to find people ^^