#plus my ex got their binder from them so i have that experience? and they never said anything bad?

[dreamcast-official]

hmmm fuck

[zebraslovescupcakestoo]

Reporting for justice!

What a night...

I thought to myself after I left the bathroom to clean myself. It was my turn to do night shifts for the next couple of weeks in favor of some who asked to do day time for a bit. Normally, I would have asked to pick someone else but we're only a few who I can trust, especially the new ones, I had to make some sacrifices for now.

Which was something that wasn't new to me.

I'm very thankful that life DID had send me some important people to help me. Even if it's someone you'd never expect to become best friends after high school and used to be in gangs.

I walked down the apartment's resident to see my friend just took out some supper. No, I don't mean Sheba this time. She'd burn water.

It was someone who had red pointy hair, a red beard to match, a navy blue tailor coat and that Scottish accent. That friend is Woody McPecker, an ex-Irish gangster now a reformed journalist.

I settled down on his dinner table that was big enough for two maybe three if you can squeeze small enough.

I can't believed even years from that day, I never expected I'd be friends with someone who used to be in an Irish gang.

If I told you that we actually first crossed eyes in my high school years, you'd say this sounds cheesy like you're eating a grill cheese sandwich that was stuffed with a whole, cylinder, block roll of cheddar cheese. You don't need to taste it if it is actually THE cheese. Maybe too cheesy.

Actually, that's way too overboard with the cheese thing. But the main point was that we crossed path in high school and then we officially met couple of years back when I was in the police academy training.

“There, this should be warm enough to eat. My grandma used to make these back when she was in the homeland.” He then set a plate of Shepard pie for me as he'd probably went to get something to drink.

For a guy who's current job as a novice journalist, I'm surprise he can cook despite that most of his time was the 'eating on the go' type of guy. Although some areas of his apartment might need a bit more cleaning overdue or he's taking a page on my nephew's habits.

But then again, at least his cooking skill can make it to the second course compared to Sheba. No offence, but Sam did asked for her cookies one time and then told me secretly he can use them as treats for his 'friends that didn't like him and us.'

“So tell me, why were you at Bendy's mansion alone? Cat's got too curious?” I looked up to the direction of his voice to see him using a bottle opener for a single bottle of Apple cider. “I thought that you'd agree in front of all of us NOT to go after that dancing demon solo. Your feet would almost be part of a construction material of a bridge if I'd haven't intervened.”

“I know. First of all, I DIDN'T go off alone chasing after Bendy. They were the ones who got me behind my back when I was paroling. Second, how did you know where I was when that happened?” I know he doesn't own a car unless he borrowed one and even if he did, surely they would noticed anyone tailing them to the DeMon's mansion.

He then settled down after he did his bottle and then started to explain. “Let's say according to someone telling me about your shifts, you were doing night duties for the moment and I was just looking out for ya since my job is more time convenient rather than a 9-5 pace thing. Luckily for you, I have gang experiences long before you studied one in the academy. They're may be Italians, but their work of operations were hardly any different than ours if with few exceptions. Like how we used to do mostly dealing 'goods' while they mostly use violence in the underworld scene of Chicago.”

Like I've said, he's an EX-gangster of an Irish mob.

“I'm not here to bust you, black knight. Besides, I thought that we've bonded over some near death experiences we've had previous to this.” He jokingly asked.

“I don't think that you can count almost being shot out of a circus' canon one time from Bendy and Boris as one when they tried to kidnap a white tiger for his skin. Thankfully you and Sam managed to get me out before I blasted off.” I sighed as I took a bite to eat. I haven't felt that scared since I almost fell off of a high pier one time.

“Anyways... how about you tell me what stories were you supposed to uncover this time? I'm sure that it's not about me tonight.” Time convenient or not, Woody knows that he can't put things off anytime he wants.

“You could at least say thank you that I managed to get us out of there safely before Bendy notice we were gone and found his minions knocked out.” He smug a grin.

I can't deny Woody's speed abilities and knife fighting skills. He's like the only person that can mimic Bendy's skills even when his eyes goes red that makes him almost invincible. His stabbing/slicing techniques makes up from his throwing knife skill sets so that one difference. The other was that at least he's now a good person.

This might sound exaggerated, but one time a thug throw a wooden staff at us like a lance and Woody 'stabbed' so fast that all that was left was saw dust. When I say his 'spirit animal' is a woodpecker, I am not joking.

“I never said I wasn't thankful. I am grateful that you saved me. But what I'm worried is that you've haven't published anything lately asides your several pen names for trivial topics. Interviews or life stories are one thing, but big news like what is happening to the world or serious issues is what the journals and people are mostly interested.”

“Bah!” He waved it off. “You worry too much! We should at least be thankful that things are quiet for now so that we can take a breather. You know? You sometimes focus way too much on others that you forgot to think about yourself once in a while. Heck! You might have been in coma for two weeks, then woke up and you'd ask if everyone we're OK when you YOURSELF aren't. Single parent or not, you'd need to learn to take care of yourself a bit once in a while too, ya know?”

I know that I get that for some people who think that I think way too about others than myself, but I have a commitment as a detective police plus two kids to take care of and they both are trouble makers like my sister was at that age. “That would be the same day that the twins would behave and that's not gonna be anytime soon.”

Woody chuckled after he finished his dish. “Felix, those kids haven't reached the double digits yet. It's common for boys at that age to be a bit rowdy. They mostly want to have fun and enjoy themselves. I know cause I was just like that and look how I turned out!” I just stared blank with a 'really?' look.

“Ok! Ok! Maybe I had been on the wrong side of the law before, but I certainly do not harm any innocents and I learn the errors of my ways! I am now a changed good fella!” Woody swore with one hand on his heart and the other in the air. I exhaled and decided to let it go. Yes, I know that he didn't started out as a good kid image, but I do believed that anyone can change if they are willing to try.

“So let's get back to the journalist topic, what stories are you going to do? Is there anything that you might want to ask me for?” I could at least return the favor.

“Now that you mentioned it, I do have some cases that I might need your detective help to solve. Since Bendy boy is going to California for a 'restful retreat' and your cousin not in the states at the moment. We all can investigate together. I know some folks who can look after your kids!”

I stopped him for a second. “Wait! Wait! Wait! Hold up! What do you mean by we ALL investigate together?”

“Oh that? I meant us two with Sammy and Matty. Us four will go investigate on these small but unusual cases.” He clarified, but I had to say this: “Look, I get that things aren't that busy for now, but don't you think that the other two would be busy? Matteo, I would understand if he's not busy on most days, but Sam's...” I didn't have much to say about him for now cause I haven't heard him from the court house lately.

“Oh, he didn't told you yet? He's taken' a little break after winning that big case today. So he's free on most days since he's not gonna work much unless it involves you-know-who.”

“Oh... I forgot about it. It's the big case with that soda fraud. I must have been busy earlier to hear the news.” I was so busy with the kids before my shift that it slipped my mind. Sure, there was a mild case that there were counterfeit sodas during these past few weeks. It's not a major news but the effects is that people were giving money to crooks who gave the cheaper priced sodas from the local markets. The drinks quality weren't as good, they tasted awful and some didn't had that fizz. Some people tried to get a refund, but the 'sellers' weren't there anymore.

“We're glad that you were the one who took the photos of those people as one of the most effective evidence. A good majority of them were caught and brought into questioning.” We did had other evidences that was convincing, but Woody was the one who really saved the day. “Nah! I'm just taking their 'good' angle for when the photos will be printed in the papers tomorrow.” He smirked. “Anyways, back to some cases in question, there are some that us 4 need to go together.”

“So there's a detective, a journalist, a lawyer and a coroner in one group. That sounded like a start of a bad bar joke.” And none of them aren't even funny for a drunk man.

“Stay with me on this. There are some claims that involves supernatural cases.” He took out some case files that were in thin binders, but I set the line there. I had reasons NOT to go in these kind of cases.

“I'm out! Look, I said this a couple of times already, but let me be clear. Just because I have this 'ability' doesn't mean I'm into supernatural cases. I can't afford to do some of this stuff on the side when we're in a middle of the operation 'take down.' There's no way that the chief will approve any ghosts, 'spiritual' mediums or fictional monsters. There's needs to be more than just someone in a costume that's not on Halloween day.”

“That I agree, cause some of these cases had their 'victims' being scammed or harassed. Kinda like that soda counterfeit case where it's not exactly the type of soda, it's brand or the market that sells them. This would require some investigation and prevent more people falling into their traps or stop those people from attacking others in a costume.” He tries to convince me.

On the first phase, I do agree that some people would try and take money from innocent buyers out of products or false readings. The second... I do get that idea of being attacked by an unknown person. That doesn't need any 'scary' costume to frighten anybody in the night.

So I eventually decided to help. “Alright. I'll help if these cases are as serious as you said it is. But I'll need to report any cases that 'we' uncovered and solved.”

Woody shakes my hand. “I knew you'd be there for me, cool cat! Now, here's the first one we're gonna go...”

Another scary night Another spooky fright And you just might be in danger.

Thus began our formation of the 'freelancing' investigation team. A group of people with separate talents that barely had any connections to one another.

The first one was about a group of teenage girls from a prestigious, all girl school reserved for rich or gifted well... girls. The case was that there's a club that specializes fortune telling and connecting the 'other side' jazz that charges not only their classmates a pretty dollar, but some grieving folks that wanted to talk to their deceased loved ones.

Getting a reading wasn't easy considering the 'no boys allowed' in most of the school's properties unless it's a visiting male relative. Woody managed to get one of the members to set us up for a 'seance' session at night when there's fewer teachers on guard in exchange of paid in cash and some photos... of Sam, Matteo and me for some odd reasons...

Look! I'm not saying that we're not all ugly! Just... why?! I mean, Sam's actually a good looking man in his 30's and Matteo had that mysterious Italian vibe going for him. Not to mention they've probably had better pay than I do that might play a hand in it. But why me?! I'm not that- Oh! Never mind! I do not need to know! ANYWAYS! Ohh the ghost is here and it's always a fake The ghost is here and there's no reason to shake The ghost is here, oh give us a break It's fake.

When we've arrived at the scene, we played out as a group of guys who wanted to contact my 'deceased' relative. We picked that story cause we wanted to be as convincingly true. During the middle of a chant-like seance, that the lyrics sounded like something that I've read in a children nursery rhyme, there's a faint image of a ghost that floated in the middle of the circle. The ghost wasn't exactly 'frightening' but Woody got spooked and he forgot to let go of my hand when he ran away in a panic. Dragging me along, we hit a wall that was actually a rotary door that lead to a hidden room with another member that handled a projector. Thus, this ended the investigation. All members of the club were then exposed as a fraud, we reported it to the dean about it and then later, their parents had to send them away to a different school after some either got expelled or suspended for a few days.

We DID however almost got boiled in hot water when we ourselves actually had broken the 'no boys allowed' rule. Thankfully Sam had pointed out the evidence about the money, the people, their projector that was actually the school's property that they 'borrowed' it that we actually need to stop them. The dean then decided to let us off the hook, but we were warned and told to ask her permission if ever we encountered a similar case like this. Another ghoul attack She's breathing down our back So we're making tracks for the exit.

The second case was about a creature called 'Night beast,' original, that haunts a cemetery the past few months. Rumors from chased out eye witness say that during night time they hear someone digging whenever they walked across the area. The ones that did went to 'investigate,' they met with this some sort of a horrid, man-sized bat-like creature and was chased out.

At first, I thought that it was just some sort of a vampire prank, but when I heard some reports of getting slashed, not to mentioned that Matteo felt something of a 'disturbance' among the 'resting' and that he felt like he needs to do something. Oh the ghost is here and it's a crook in a suit The ghost is here and he's protecting some loot The ghost is here, oh give him the boot He's fake.

So we devised a plan. Me and Matteo will be playing as the night visitors for a 'relative' of Matteo to lure them out while Sam and Woody will be hiding to catch out bat of the night with a well set trap.

On that full moon night, me and Matteo walked into one of the tombs to see if our 'guardian' of the cemetery will be in tonight. It doesn't take much steps inside when he broke free from the newer caskets. I took out a hand mirror, upon Woody's request to see if this 'guy' doesn't have a reflection.

Yup, it's some big guy in a costume. Now we run!

It doesn't matter where we go, we know A ghost is gonna show and so We look for the bogus We look for the scam And every time the ghost is a sham.

We make sure that during the day time, we'd memorized the tombstone's placements so that we knew exactly which direction we need to take for us and him to follow. Once we've passed the trees that the others were hiding, Matteo rang a little bell and then they pulled the cord. Thankfully, it worked and now our target is eating dirt and before he realized it, he was tied up very quickly thanks to Woody.

He took off the mask only to reveal he's a small time thief that was wanted from a neighboring state. Not only that he was wanted for stealing jewelry from wealthy homes, but he was also wanted for stealing jewelry from the cemeteries too!

Well, that would explain a good part...

Thankfully, he was then transferred to the neighboring state he was wanted and we manage to find his stash from the newer caskets that he hid and a good majority was returned.

Matteo noticed that we might have knocked over a couple of makeshift flower offerings during the chase. I offered to help him place them with him and we got along fine...

We see an eerie light And if the mood is right Then you just might sight a monster.

We had several others before we came to the last rumor with a 'vengeful,' mutant, fish-man that's frightening most of the seafood sellers from the street markets during evenings. This was personal to me.

Not only does this masked fish-man was scaring off the workers, but there were reports of that 'mutant' stealing their goods!!

At this point in the game, I'm getting convinced that even if this isn't as big as the Alfonzo Mafia case, but taking an important food aliments from small business owners, only to get them in a much more expensive price point from another competitive fish market? This takes the fish cakes!

No one takes a basic human and cat food rights just for a few dollar more! Not on my cat eye's watch!

Oh the ghost is here, it's our frightening task To face our fears and the creep in the mask So the ghost is here, there's no reason to ask He's fake.

We followed the clues, witnesses and a theory that this might be a dirty strategy for the competitors to scare their rivals, take their goods and sell it for a higher profit. Upon sneaking in one of their warehouses where they shipped and stored their goods, we checked for any markings.

We've set up a plan to track down their goods by marking them so that we can find and then prove the guilty people to be held responsible for this mess. This time, I was with Sam in the main storehouse while the others went to find the light switches in the power/control center. We were using flashlights and looked for the recently 'new arrivals' to check if they had the matching numbers that the victims marked.

It's a match. However, that not the only discovery we've made... Our fish mutant is also the security guard!

We both bolted through the isles as it chases us. Sam told me to go corner it in the canned seafood section as he used his hook shot techniques to go up. I get that I'm supposed to lure him there but for what and what is he doing?!

I was then cornered and I was close to that fish mutant within feet from each other. Not that I'm not a skillful fighter, but I've had some troubles with opponents that are almost body builder types like Boris. Not to mentioned that the claws were an addition to a heck-naw! Flair.

Suddenly the lights went on to brighten up the whole warehouse,  it blinded the fish mutant but it's the same for me. All I did was trying to adjust my eyes to the lights and then I heard someone being tackled into the wall of canned sardines. I had to take a few seconds more to see that Sam had taken my handcuffs on this unconscious security guard.

It didn't took a second long before we heard the police siren and soon some officers, which are the ones that I'm familiar with and another high ranking officer to see us. Woody was ready for a picture as we all see that underneath the fish mutant was one of the rival employees that was harassing the local fish marketeers and taking their goods.  

It's been almost a week since that last case we did as a team. Sure, it's not a major news like taking down that notorious Alfonso mafia, but it did brought us quite a praising reputation. We we're referenced as the 'freelance investigation team' according to the public. Woody did a pretty good job as a journalist rather than an officer of the law. I think it was for the best when he decided to do so a few months ago.

We decided to celebrate as to throw a big party at a fun family dinner including the guys, Sheba, Kitty, the twins with a couple of their friends. Just to keep them company asides from adults. It was an enjoyable moment with just us as friends and family get together. I felt like it was like that old times when it was with my father, sister and the twins when they were younger.

Unfortunately, it got interrupted by someone. It was in the middle of a pinball machine contest, where I was holding Inky while Woody was holding Winky so they can be high enough to use the controllers. I felt something smacked at the back of my head as if someone tried to get my attention. I looked to see that my cousin was standing behind me. “I was feeling quite distress that I wasn't invited, my dear cousin. I thought that we we're close... well, I'm the better one but still, we we're so close.”

“What are you doing here, Alex? You weren't invited.” Woody noticed what was going on.

“Aww! Did I ruffled your little feathers, you annoying parrot? Well too bad. I'm obviously not letting 'him' have a goodnight this time. You've been getting too lucky lately, cousin. Have you forgotten that this will not last forever? That there might be someone who, oh, I don't know... MIGHT be in danger while you're 'resting?'” He teased me as to make me feel guilty of taking a night off for this. I grew wary of his attitude ever since he reappeared for more than 2 years. I can take whatever he's throwing at me as long as it doesn't involves those who were close to me, but as much as I want to stop him from smacking my head, I can't break off from Inky at the moment and neither Woody can.

He suddenly stopped when a shadowy appearance entered our situation. “Why hello, dear old 'friend.' I've seen you've recovered from our last... encounter. Did you find another decent job or just a 'temporary' part-time?” Matteo might have spooken one of our nine lives if he's gonna continue like a grim reaper facade. I remembered how Matteo once told me how he and Alex met and almost killed in Egypt, but I've yet to know how Alex got wary of Matteo since. I mean, Matteo had to wear a mask for his eyes thanks to him, but why is he afraid of him now? Have he and Matteo had a second encounter before coming here?

He took a step back but maintained his composure. He knows that he can manage Matteo well cause his melee fighting skills weren't his forte. Awakened or not, he's still not a match for Alex.

Unless someone else who just happens to return from the gentleman’s restroom. Alex only took one step back to hit him and looked up with eyes wide opened. He might have a toe to toe advantage for us three, but Sam's a different story. It didn't take much for Sam to knock him out with a fist on the head. He might not be a boxer, but he can do knock out punches.“Please let me take out this thrash. The waitresses are busy enough with something else tonight.” Sam picks him up from the jacket as they both left... Thank Ra that the girls are in the ladies room at the moment and that it's not crowded tonight. Even the kids didn't noticed but I think it's the fact that they're busy with the game to notice their surroundings. For this time, I'll take it and talk to him next time.

“Cheer up, cool cat. This ain't the time to be pessimistic. In fact, I've got a nice juicy reward for all of us excluding cue tip there.” Woody said before the pinball games were done.

“What surprise?” The twins heard that. Aw, Tuna Fish! Once they heard that, it's almost impossible to change the subject. But that didn't stop Woody to try. “Oh, I'm afraid it's for the adults and there won't be any kids you age there, kittens. But don't ch'a worry! If you both behave really good, you can spend a whole night with Coach Tony and his son!” They both got that sparkle in their little emerald green eyes like they just heard a message from God.

Not only coach Tony is like another father figure to them, but he's one of the kind heart adult that would make every kid included, even if they're not the best. The kids love him and his son too. I think that they almost looked like they're triplets. My kids would probably only be on their best behavior around him more than I can think of.

They soon started begging me to go to the 'adults only' event, so after thinking about it quickly, I said to then only if they behave and to stick to the rules, they can. They hugged me and then they ran over to Kitty and Sheba as soon as they came.

“What's with them?” Sheba asked. “Oh, Felix will tell about it later. He just needed to be informed about what's gonna happened in a couple of weeks. I'm sure we'll be there.” Matteo smiled and Sheba was a bit charmed.

“Ohhhhh! You're so mystique when you say that! Felix! You better give us all the details later!” Sheba told me as they head to the table to get their things as they passed by Sam once he's returned. She and Matteo got along well since... well, our introductions a couple of moths before.

“Alright! Now that they're distracted and that us guys are all here, guess what's gonna be happenin' big this time around here!” Woody reached over my shoulders and Matteo's as to make us closer while Sam just bended down a bit. Judging from their faces, I'm guessing that they've have planned on something. “So! Just to finish our celebration of our teamwork during the random cases, which involves money scams, robberies and harassment, we've been invited to the Chicago's summer ball this year.” Woody announced with a big grin.

What? The annual Chicago's summer ball? That's like one of the big events in the city annually. Normally, only the first class, important business owners, politicians and sometimes big guest stars gather for an evening night club jazz and a garden stroll that's decorated just for the event before reopened for the whole public. Anyone like ourselves would only dream to attend at the event.

“The old mayor gave all of us exclusive VIP tickets for our works and a couple of extras for the girls. We were chosen for each of our talents separately and since this would also be part of my journalist career, it would mean quite a lot to me if we can all go together!” Woody flashed the tickets. As much as this was a very good news, I had to...

“But... I'm not exactly social elite type. Not to mentioned that Bendy and Boris will be there too since they're required to attend AND they never turn down free alcohols and five star meals.” Not to mentioned mingling with top class women who wanted to climb the latter or gold digging their ways... Another reason why I don't like about him is that he uses his money to get whatever he wants. What ever happened to being loyal to one partner for life?

“Bah! I wouldn't worry about that brat and his wolf rug on that night, Félix.” Sam waved a bit. “Animator or mafia boss, even he can't get away with anything on that particular night. There will be guards, photographers and even people that aren't in his favors at the event. Some of it will be in papers and television wide after all and well... there will be too many eye witnesses everywhere.” He's got a good point. Bendy can be maliciously calculating but he knows better than plotting something within these events.

Well, 'inside' the events. If you can count his lower crew members to do his dirty work outside in the city else where.

“This would be my first time attending to such event, si? It would be interesting if it's any different from where I came from and it would ease me if you can come.” Matteo charmed in as if he wanted me to attend too.

“Come on, ya old bugger! Think of it as a free date in a fancy dinner restaurant with special guest stars! Ya girl will love it!” Woody is really urging me to go.

You know what? What the heck! What can possibly go wrong?

----Author's Notes-----

You have NO idea of how long it took me, even in quarantine times, that I wanted to finish this but I was too numb to do so... Like I wanted to do it but I'm lacking of motivation to do so?

So anyways, I decided to redo my second OC of Woody McPecker as an ex-Irish gangster now journalist. I did watched previous years on the war between the Irish and the Italians gang members who wanted a piece of territories in the new world. Long story short, they were at war with each other. So I thought that this would be an interesting concept for someone who's a former gangster, knows the strings of operations in between the gangs and knows their methods of how they work.

So I thought that it would be interesting if there's like a redeeming character like that and hopefully Woody would be a much better OC for this that he was in my Golden Eyes series. I thought that he would be done as an extra but after some thoughts, he would be just fine as a journalist and knows stuff like Sheba's level and my first personal favorite OC, Sam Toucan.

That was inspired by an old Scooby Doo VHS movie back in the 90's and this song inspires it.

I bet it would be neat if this would work out like that Scooby Doo vibes with a larger character casts like that on the official BBTIM AU!

I hope that everyone is doing fine and that hopefully we will see the light at the end of that tunnel, stay safe!

BBTIM Characters belongs to @marini4 and some Ocs belongs to me.

[spale-vosver]

A Year In Review: 2018 Edition

I don’t normally make my own posts here, nor are they ever personal (I say as though I make posts at all), but since the year is very close to being over—in fact, as I’m writing this it’s 11:02 PM on December 31st—I wanted to look back at where I’ve been and where I still have to go; review the year, basically.

2018 was one hell of a bumpy year for me, though bumpy isn’t inherently bad. I met some amazing friends (you’ll all be mentioned later on) and at the same time lost and almost lost some amazing ones, whether it was to them moving away or my own mistakes. I got involved in so many new things I’d never done before: I got fully involved in theatre, I got kind of maybe in shape, I started caring about my health, I met so many new people both irl and online, I asked my (now ex but still best friend) girlfriend out for the first time it was honestly so new to me and coming out of my shell was an experience I needed.

As the year progressed and school wrapped up, though, I started to wane a bit. Anyone who knows me knows that summer wasn’t great mental health, especially since I was cooped up inside all day doing absolutely nothing but watching YouTube and playing way too much Crusader Kings, and everyone I interacted with felt the effects. I wasn’t nearly as accountable for my own health as I should have been, and I ended up hurting the same amazing people I’d met that year. Truth be told, I’ve still not fully recovered from those mistakes, and though I know no one holds it against me, they’re still some of my biggest regrets. Even now I’m still making them, but each time I make one, it’s less severe than the last time, and each time progressively less and less bad, so I’m improving, though not as fast as I want to, and unfortunately that speed won’t be achieved until I finally start CBT.

Speaking of that, this year wasn’t totally awful on the mental health front, though, considering I both went to a gender therapist to speak about advancements in my transition and was properly diagnosed with anxiety and depression and probably autism, and I can finally start treatment for them. When I do, my own efforts won’t be in vain, and I’ll hopefully have a leg up on whatever treatment I start. I just hope it comes soon, though, because seasonal depression can actually kiss my ass and no, Pennsylvania, 11 days is NOT a suitable amount of time for a break.

Anyways, now on to the real gushy stuff where I @ my friends and acquaintances and tell them how much I lurvvvv them. So, starting off with who I met first:

@thefunrepository/Camille/pash: When you let me join your discord server, I met some of the best people and best friends I’ve ever had, and for that, I’m eternally grateful. Even though you’ve now left that server, when you were there, you tolerated so much of my incessant rambling and @ing and my overall teenage boy-i-ness, but you never made me feel excluded, and I loved every second of it. Thank you so much for even tolerating me, because when I joined and was even just talking to you, that was what I needed most. (P.S.: here’s a New Years resolution for you: FINISH A WIP thanks bye I love you)

@xinnic: my fellow Irish Catholic fam, you’ve been nothing but supportive of me and my work from day one, and I can’t count how many nights over the pretty-shitty summer I spent cooling down by rambling to you about my gay trash kids and my gay trash WIP. Likewise, I’ve never gotten tired of your ramblings about your gay trash kids and your gay trash WIP, and your rambles have singlehandedly made me weak for Roísín in 1000 different ways. You’ve always been there when I needed to talk or reference something, and when you bring your meme game, it’s top tier. I remember almost crying when you started the binder squad, and though it’s no longer around, I still appreciate it. Thank you so much for caring and just being you.

@lilquill: man, oh man do we have a weird relationship. I honestly kind of thought you were annoying at first and no that’s not unique to you but I also warmed up to you really quickly. Your energy levels are unmatched and no matter how tired I am, your ability to somehow shout over text fixes that. You’ve spearheaded so many weird and memorable moments for the hell server, including the readings that led us to our voice reveals, to the ACOTRASH find and replace kerfuffle, and so many other things. Besides that, you’ve been a great friend, always pushing me to do better and be better and calling me out when necessary; I may not show it the best, but I appreciate all of it, and I probably wouldn’t be who I am right now without you. You’re also one of the bravest and most outspoken people I know, with the whole whiteblr deal only proving how willing you are to speak out against bullshit and bigotry. Thank you so much for your undying support of me and of everyone else, and I only hope to be as badass as you someday.

@gingerly-writing: ok please don’t be upset that yours is slightly shorter than everyone else’s but I wasn’t around you as much SO. You’re an insanely talented writer and memeing at you as well as sharing my writing has been so fun. I annoy you so much but you still manage to tolerate me and honestly that’s insanely commendable. I want to see you succeed in all of your projects this year and the next and the next and so on, as well as continue giving amazing advice; when you told me I was really good at characterisation, it was the first time I’d ever gotten proper writing advice, and I’ll cherish it always. Thank you for being a pal and dealing with mine (and someone else’s who we’ll mention later) shenanigans.

@olympusrox123: Sian, you fucking Aussie meme, I love you so much and you won’t get this until later because you’re on a goddamn plane but oh well. You’re insanely funny and smart, and you’ve made me laugh so many times I can’t keep count. When you took part in the name change shenanigans on discord, that was when I knew you were A Top Tier Meme and someone I could send only my freshest. Apart from that, you’re so sweet and have always been interested in what I have to say; plus, I love screaming at you about whatever and whenever and that time we read the Sherlock fic? Godly. Anyways, I just want to say that I heckin love you and that I hope you stay just as you are. Thank you for being you.

@ardentlythieving: oh man oh man oh man my ultimate meme buddy. My compadre. Second member of the three Memesketeers. The shit we’ve gotten up to together is amazing and I’ve loved every second of it. From the day we met we’ve been basically inseparable members, despite your penchant for backstabbing and betraying my meme plans due to your chaotic neutral nature, and every memey thing we’ve done together and every in joke we’ve made has been one of the most memorable meme moments of my life. You’ve always been there when I wanted or needed to just let loose my chaotic energy, and the fact that you just sort of adopted me into both your meme house and your internet family in general has made me so happy. I’ve loved playing SWTOR with you and talking about Thrawn with you and sending you the worst shit I can find, and I wouldn’t trade a second of it. Thank you for being your memey-ass self, and if I don’t get even better memes this year I’m flying to your hell-sheep-rock-land to fight you.

@thornheartcat: we’re waaaaay too fucking similar for our own good. To our taste in video games and anime (max weebage) to our experiences with ASD, I’ve found so many ways to relate to you, which has made talking to you so fun. And that’s another thing: you’re older than me by a lot, but you’ve never treated me any differently, which has meant so much to me. You’ve always put me on equal ground with you and the rest of your friends, and have tolerated my fuckery since day 1, even if you do have some questionable choices in media you enjoy. The long and short of it is, you’re hella rad and hella nerdy, and I love nerding out with you. Thank you for seeing past my age and treating me just like anyone else.

@catcatamelia: chaotic Aussie lesbian says what??? Amelia you’re fucking great and so talented and so creative, and you’re so much fun to be around. I love playing shitty and good video games with you, as well as just talking and memeing back and forth and watching you draw; you’re so amazingly multitalented and interesting that I never get bored around you. I wish that we could hang out via the interwebs more, but bullshit scheduling is bullshit scheduling and whatcha gonna do. You’ve also always been there to comfort me because, like so many of my amazing friends, we share so many issues and commonalities that you always know just what to say. Thank you for never being afraid to open up and just be your wild self. Please never change.

@sea-reader: I left you for last because I have the most to say to you. Our relationship has been up and down in the almost one year we’ve known each other, and it’s mostly due to me. Since we started talking on discord, I’ve always loved listening to you talk about whatever; you always bring your own energy and passion to it, and even if it’s about stuff I don’t know a whole ton about, I’m never bored listening to you talk about it. You’re funny, and smart, and talented, and I’m so glad to have met you in the first place. You were a major factor in helping me out of my shell; there wasn’t a day that went by in the first half of this year where I didn’t mention you in some capacity to someone I knew because you’d said something hilarious or really smart or had brought some new idea I’d never thought of to the table or just done something. Was it the most healthy thing in the world? No, and looking back on it we started getting unhealthy even before The Thing That I’m Not Going To Mention In Public, but we’re continuing to grow and improve even to this day, and for that I’m forever thankful. You could have easily shut me out after that incident, but you didn’t; you gave me a second chance that I’ve rarely ever gotten, and I’m so, so glad. I know we likely won’t ever be as close as we once were, nor will we be able to talk like we once did, but that’s okay, because it doesn’t have to be perfect. It just has to be us, and it has to be healthy, and that’s enough for me. I love you more than I can say, just like everyone else, and I can only hope 2019 brings the best for the both of us. Thank you for being a friend, Lori, because our relationship, the good and the bad, was part of what I needed and got from all of the people I interacted with and met this year. Happy New Year, you dork.

If I missed anyone, please forgive me; it’s now 7 minutes to 2019, and I’m rushing. Tl;dr; Happy New Years, everyone. Be a little better, because you can be, even if you don’t think so.

-Geoff.

[marksburyscripts]

Season 1, Episode 6-- Step By Step

Google Doc

[Walton’s office. The scene begins with a recording from several years ago, taking place in Victor’s bedroom. Victor’s voice is noticeably higher pitched]

VICTOR

...How’re we feeling about this?

HENRY

You look fantastic.

VICTOR

I don’t know, maybe-- Maybe I should just stick with the dress.

HENRY

Do you want to wear the dress?

VICTOR

Well, no, but--

HENRY

Then don’t worry about it. You’ve spent all these years pretending to be something you’re not, this is your chance to take that first step into the public eye. And if anyone says anything? Fuck ‘em. Did any of them get into Ingleside?

VICTOR

Well, they might have, I don’t exactly talk to--

HENRY

No, they didn’t. So when graduation rolls around and we finally get to get out of that shithole, you’re never gonna have to worry about what any of them think of you ever again. 

VICTOR

...Elliot’s still got next year, though, people might--

HENRY

Name one time Elliot has ever given a shit about other people’s opinions. Look, maybe you don’t notice it, but… I see the way he looks at you. It’s the same way you look at him. You two are made for each other, everyone knows that. And I don’t think that the school knowing you’re a dude is going to change that. Plus, you spent $400 on this suit, you dumb rich bastard, I can’t in good faith let you waste that kind of money.

VICTOR [He laughs] 

Good point.

HENRY

So, you feel good? Binder’s not too tight, you can breathe fine?

VICTOR

Yeah. Yeah, I’m good. [Beat.] Henry, you know you can come with us.

HENRY

Nah, I’ll meet up with you there.

VICTOR

Seriously, though… you can’t tell me that no one asked you.

HENRY

Well sure, people asked me. I just don’t care enough about prom to go with someone I don’t actually like just so I can say I have a date.

VICTOR

Okay, yeah, that makes sense. But… you didn’t ask anyone, either? There’s no one you were interested in going with?

HENRY

No one available. [Beat.] All right, it’s that time. I’ll see you guys there. You, go get your boyfriend.

[The recording ends, and we focus on the present day. Victor’s voice is back to normal]

VICTOR

I know it’s cliche to say that night was one of the best of my life, but… it was. I still wasn’t out to my family, but that was the first time I started really accepting myself. It felt… genuine. Just Elliot, Henry, and… me. The real version of me, the one I’d hidden for most of my life. This is… the closest to that I’ve felt in a long time. I’m not going to say that I’m okay, that’s obviously not true. But… I can’t remember the last time I’ve felt this close. Good things just… don’t happen to me anymore. I’ve spent almost a year waking up and having to force myself to look at the phone, half expecting to see a message telling me that he was gone. But he’s not. He’s back, and… and he doesn’t hate me.

WALTON

You still haven’t told me why you think he would hate you. It was a break-in, it wasn’t your fault.

VICTOR

I know, I just.… I need more time for that part. Right now, I’m just focused on the fact that he’s okay. 

WALTON

How’s his recovery going?

VICTOR

The doctors are surprised. He’s just about ready to move into a wheelchair, they figured he’d be bedridden for significantly longer. Honestly, I’m as shocked as they are. If I didn’t know any better, I’d say it was nothing short of a miracle. But then… maybe it’s just one of my….

WALTON

Experiences?

VICTOR

Sure, if that’s what you want to call it. You don’t have to pretend to believe any of that, by the way. I know you don’t. Still though, it’s safe to say that even with the strides he’s making, there are still going to be some… lasting difficulties. I mean, I’m sure I don’t have to tell you that that sort of thing has all sorts of physical consequences, not to mention the head trauma--

[He cuts himself off. There is a beat of silence]

WALTON

Are you okay?

VICTOR

...What if I ruined his life? Henry, he-- he’s a genius, he really is. And a hockey star in high school and undergrad. Best power forward in Marksbury State history, some people’ve said. I can’t confirm that, I don’t know enough about sports to tell a good player from a bad one. Or what a power forward is. But what if all of that isn’t possible anymore? And he’s already delayed on getting his Ph.D now that he’s missed all this time, what if--

WALTON

We can’t always worry about the “What if”s, Victor. In situations where we can’t change the outcome, dwelling on potential negative circumstances can lead to unnecessary stress. And you and I both know you don’t need any more of that.

VICTOR [He laughs a bit]

Yeah, that’s true. 

WALTON

Plus, disabilities aren’t the end of the world.

VICTOR

Yeah, good point. Still, though… he’s a good person, he deserves to have life be easy for him. And it hasn’t been, he’s had to fight every step of the way. I’ve tried to help him, but, [Laughs] Clerval is one stubborn son of a gun. It took five years before he’d let me buy him a soda. He’s always gotta be the helper. I’m sure someone could psychoanalyze that, but it’s neither my specialty nor my business. So I choose not to. ...I guess I’m just worried about him. That when he does need help doing things he used to be able to do on his own-- And he will, I know that-- That he’s going to be… upset, I guess? Self-conscious is a better word, maybe. Henry was there for me during some of the worst times of my life, I just wanna do the same for him. I just don’t know how.

WALTON

I think you’ve already got the right idea. There’s not much that you can do for him right now. But you can be there. You've had a rough few years, but now you have physical proof that things can and will get better. Henry is back, and you have that new friend of yours, Christine--

VICTOR

I wouldn't call her a friend. She's… an acquaintance, if anything. I'm still not even sure I trust her.

WALTON

And why is that? 

VICTOR

I don’t know. I guess…. Look at the way things have been going for me lately. My brother and my boyfriend were murdered, and my best friend nearly was. You can see why that might make me a little hesitant to let someone new get close. No need to try and work that one out, it’s obvious. Plus, she…. [He pauses to find the words] She has an… ex… that I… don't get along with.

WALTON

Okay, so that's a lie.

VICTOR

It's not. It's just… complicated. I'm not…. I-- I'd rather leave it at that for now.

WALTON

Can you at least tell me this ex’s name?

VICTOR

...Erik. It-- [Beat.] His name is Erik.

WALTON

We’ll leave it there for today, we can talk about Christine and Erik when you’re ready. Did you do that worksheet I gave you?

VICTOR

Yes, and I complained the whole time.

WALTON

Even so, I’m glad it got done. So then, let’s see what you wrote down.

VICTOR

Right. [He clears his throat, sarcasm thick] “Positive traits about myself”. One: Genius. Obviously. Two: Able to drink three energy drinks and two cups of coffee within eight hours without throwing up. 

[Walton sighs]

VICTOR (Cont.)

Number three… Put on real pants on a day where I didn’t have to for work.

WALTON

That’s very good, actually.

VICTOR

Yeah, okay.

WALTON

I mean it. Victor, it’s not always going to be huge strides every day. Progress comes in stages. The little victories are just as important as the monumental ones.

VICTOR

...Right.

WALTON

What else have you got?

VICTOR

...That’s it. I know you said to put five, but I just couldn’t think of anything.

WALTON

That’s all right. Like I said, little victories. Why don’t we keep working on it for next week?

VICTOR

...Fine. 

WALTON

I do think you should try to keep in contact with Christine, too. The past is the past, and if she’s making an effort to connect with you, then there’s no harm in considering the possibility.

VICTOR

But what if she’s--

WALTON

Out to get you? You’re a smart man, Victor. How likely is it that this is all some ploy to get you, rather than her just wanting a friend? She’s new in town, and she’s probably just happy to see a familiar face. Who knows? Once Henry is out of the hospital, maybe all three of you could start spending time together. [Victor is silent] You don’t like the idea?

VICTOR

...No, I-- I just…. I mean, is that… right?

WALTON

What do you mean?

VICTOR

For… for pretty much our whole lives, it was…. It was just the three of us. Me, Henry, and-- And Elliot. Now Elliot is gone, and….

WALTON

You feel like letting Christine in would be replacing him. That’s understandable. But I can promise you, that’s not the case. You’re not replacing him, you’re moving on. You’re healing. And besides. Do you think he’d want you to be alone? Or would he rather you be happy, with people who care about you?

VICTOR

...Can I stop recording now, Dr Walton?

WALTON

Of course. Do whatever you need to do.

NEXT EPISODE➝

[nothingnoteworthy]

Chapter 8: Liminal Sandwich Shops

Overload loved a good rave. The louder the music and the bigger the crowd equaled the better the time.  Plus, no one really noticed if you were physically sparking on the dance floor. You could lose control, generate too much energy, teleport to an entirely different rave in an entirely different country and no one in either rave really cared. Well. No one cared if you ended up at the right type of rave. Not every party with bad lighting and glowsticks counted.

It wasn’t surprising that it was the buzz she was sensing. A large party in the middle of an otherwise empty, quiet commercial area would be putting off noticeable electricity. Apparently it wasn’t her sole opinion. Some sort of insect with too many legs and too much body slammed itself onto the roof. The crowd panicked and they were in the right. She would too if she hadn’t given herself the responsibility of protecting people from superpowered threats. Ash was a lot more prepared to take it on. Probably a mixture of bravery and excessive experience in killing bugs. Overload wasn’t going to do it, Caroline thought her fear was hilarious, and Lyric tried to pied piper them out of the fucking apartment. Like the nonviolent effort was appreciated but please set it on fire.

Overload snagged Ash before she could start the fight. There was something at the edge of her awareness, one powerful and familiar enough to make Overload retreat into the shadows. Sure enough Scream Queen showed up in a burst of that signature PDU light. The creature was done for in the most humane way possible. Which, given that its legs were being chopped off, probably wasn’t much better than being lit on fire.

She kept backing up, deeper into the alley. This was not a good time to have a run in with Scream Queen. Overload had the presence of mind to not wear spandex but if your ex catches you lurking in an alleyway wearing head to do black and metal plating with a cheap mask and a girl that breathes fire she’s gonna know what you’re up to. She didn’t want to get caught working as a vigilante, especially not by this ex. It was weird.

Her anxiety spiked. Scream Queen lingered after the battle. Just. looking around. Casual. Calm. Collected. Fucking creepy with her god damned spiny teeth just sorta stapled onto the burlap. She seemed to lose interest and leave but. She might come back. Overload wouldn’t put it past her to mess with someone like that. Jumpscares and all.  Even if she didn’t, a UN clean up crew would and that meant it was high time to move on. This was getting them nowhere anyway. It was time to seek outside help. On the lucky hand, she had another ex in the area who was much more comfortable with masks and usually had good information. On the unlucky hand, she had another ex in the area. Tonight sucked.

Overload tried to keep thinking of him as her contact. But that just made it seem like they were friends on superhero facebook or something. Which she actually would be, although she would probably hide him from her feed. The thought would be mutual. Probably. He hung out in a sketchy looking sandwich franchise that she was pretty sure he actively worked to make sketchy. Single story, had to have been at least a 20 year old building, hidden at the end of the road with two four story office buildings on either side of it.Weirdly large parking lot for a tiny shop that literally no one was at, ever. There wasn’t a single car in that parking lot and the open sign was so heavily aged you probably couldn’t tell when it was on. The inside was extremely sterile in contrast with the outside dinge. You could smell the antiseptic. The floor was so shiny you could do your make up with it. It was weird. She didn’t like it. One day she’d bring Caroline here to get confirmation that he somehow set up his life in a pocket dimension.

Overload pushed open the employees only door, weaving through the shimmeringly clean racks straight for a box freezer. She shoved it to the side, revealing a narrow staircase that revitalized the rust chic the outside had. It was less rickety than it looked. Ash went first, a small fireball in her hand lighting just a few feet in front of them. Enough to see where they were going but not enough to be able to tell exactly how much of the stairs were iron and how much were thin flaky rust.

They ended in a bare cement room, empty except for a flickering lightbulb. Her ex/contact was nothing if not cautious. Understandable, given his particular situation. Overload walked up to one of the walls and began to bang on it with her fist.

“Heeey buddy, open up, I need some info and there’s a 75% chance you have it. Come on, don’t be annoying it’s alright like 12 at night I know you’re up and I know neither of us want to be up. Or, well, okay, you probably want to be up because you don’t sleep because you seem to think you have infinite health and will never get sleep deprivation ever but you’ve gotten it before like right before my damn eyes so I know it happens and then you get the sleep headaches and you get all grumpy and frankly that’s uncalled for. I mean you might be sleeping right now but I don’t think -”

The wall slowly slid to the left, revealing a large grey bipedal wolf. With hands. Now how he would describe himself (he liked getting out a large red plastic binder with printed wikipedia entries of various werewolfs, wolfmen, and humanoid dog creatures and showing you the highlighted portions) but it was how Overload did it. Wolf on two legs with hands. There we go. At least he was wearing a pair of loose black workout pants. So that was a bit of description embellishment. Something fancy to get going on. Pants. His ears slid back slightly and he tapped one of his feet against the ground. “What’s the other 25%?”

“Fleas. 75% information. 25% fleas.”

“You’re hilarious. Come in, tell me what you’re looking for.” He paused, glancing at Ash. “I don’t have fleas don’t listen to her. That was one time and it was her that had the fleas first.”

“It’s true, I did. It was finals week, I spent a few hours at the dogpark with a giant bucket of dried chicken livers buying the love of the city’s dog population.” Overload explained. Ash sighed heavily and walked into the spacious room. Half of it was laid out like an apartment, a little kitchen, a tiny table, a beat up couch and a coffee table. There was a large bed, piled with pillows and blankets, that looked like it had never been made. There rest of it was covered in computers. Desks and tables were arranged in a large U shape, with a cluster of servers and other components in the center of the room. Several large screens hung from the wall, each displaying several windows full of numbers, pictures and documents. It was a lot. Gave Overload one hell of a headache.

“I’m Kevin by the way. A lot of people call me K9, my project code back at Biotech was really unfortunate. Or really well planned.” He held out a large furry, clawed hand to Ash. She hesitated for just a moment, cautiously giving his hand a small shake.

"Ash."

"Nice to meet you Ash. What were you looking for Overload? I've got my own project right now but I might have gotten something on the side." He quickly moved to the other side of the room taking a seat into a large plush rolling chair.

“You’ve probably heard of the digital attacks on some companies in the area? We tried to see what was going on but their server room was fried. You could go in any room in the building and see every scream freaking out. It was pretty bad. Plus there was this weird person in red? Teleporting?” Overload dropped onto his couch. Kevin wrinkled his brow and stared at her before shaking his head.

“The teleporting person, I’m not sure. There’s a lot of possibilities but it quickly becomes too many possibilities. If they’re good, cameras will never catch them. If the cameras never catch them, neither do I. All I get is some word of mouth and that takes forever to form into a profile. The attacks, yeah. Everyone’s heard about that. It’s another Old Series Biotech soldier, I don’t remember her project code but her project name was Antivirus.”

“Ironic.”

“Yeah. Let me see what I have on her, I’m glad you’re on her trail. She’s low key but dangerous. If she stays on the streets she’s going to start fights with other ex-Biotechs, both old and new series.” Kevin turned his focus back to his computers, sorting through files. He went quiet for a bit, massive body hunched over his keyboard, staring into the rows of screens. At least Kevin and Overload got along still. It would be kind of unfortunate if an information hound like him was  out to get her. It would also be unfortunate if he ever heard her make that pun. Someone needed to get a new sense of humor, or at least learn to respect the beautiful time honored art of wordplay. It was the one sore spot in their otherwise decent relationship. If only.

“What are you working on?” She asked, watching Ash unsuccessfully try to wipe a few stray hairs off her pants. They would be there forever.

“Something a lot more interesting than some computer problems. The city’s grown itself another cult. A lot of them are just smoke, mirrors, and sedatives but some of them have Astral influence. This one’s got something big.” Kevin got excited, his ears perking up. “I think they’re trying to resurrect or even create some kind of deity. So Cool. I mean. It’s not, not really cool people will die and I gotta put a stop to it but they had to pick up a lot of ancient forgotten stuff, thousands of years old.”

“Is it a bad god?” Ash didn’t seem comfortable with the couch or the conversation. Overload smiled sympathetically.

“I wouldn’t say that it’s a good one. I’ve already found a ritual spot covered in blood. Whatever they’re creating it’s not friendly. I’m not done decoding all of the information I’ve found, but I’ve found enough references to a ‘sea of blood’ and ‘cities full of emptiness’ to come to the conclusion that maybe this shouldn’t happen. And there we go. Here, the flash drive is secure but try not to put it on an internet connected device.” Kevin swung around, pulling one of the dangling drives off his tower, tower. “I’m gonna call you if I need a hand. I work well with lightning powers.”

Hm. Oh yes. The, other thing that stained their relationship. One of his exes. Fun. Fun reminder. Still. Sounded bad. Probably a lot worse what they were working on. But also a bit weird that the PDU wasn’t involved. Kevin would’ve never gotten into it if they were. “I’ll bring the whole crew. Who knows what powers their evil-cult-god will have.”

“I’m hoping I can put a stop to it before they actually manage to wake it up. I should be able to pull a few strings and get them cut off. Fingers crossed.” He grinned, managing to not look like he was trying to eat them. Overload laughed and took the drive, motioning for Ash to get up.

“Fingers crossed. Thanks for the help.”

“Anytime Duracell.”

“See ya later Rover.”

“Bite me.”

[filmfreak1994]

Top 5 books

In no particular order other than the first one;

1. The Great Gatsby

I think it was mostly my American Lit teacher who made me love this book so much (he was lit, bum bum ching). He didn’t just stick to reading the book and asking dumb questions or playing an audiotape and expecting us to shut up while we listened to it, he made us take notes on shit (I still have the old binder from that class, fucking six years ago hot damn) he explained certain things that have lost their meaning in the eighty-plus years the book’s been out, went deeper into the book’s characters and the timeline so I walked out of class after reading the last page with a deeper appreciation of it than I probably would otherwise. On top of that it’s just a damn good book. Choosing to have a sort of side character be the focal point gets you immersed in the mystery surrounding Gatsby, the deconstruction of the Roarin’ 20s and the callous behavior of the elite is still applicable to this day, there’s a lot to dissect and to love about it. I make it a point to try and reread it every year (don’t always succeed but I try).

2. The Graveyard Book

I have nothing but bare bones knowledge on the original ‘Jungle Book’ (enough to know the differences between it and the Disney version are numerous enough to fill another book) but that didn’t stop me from loving the shit out of this book-sized tribute to it. Just the idea of a kid being raised by ghosts in a graveyard is interesting enough, Neil Gaiman went the extra mile by including all sorts of other shit like ghouls as the bandaar log, a werewolf as Baloo, a vampire as Bagheera, an ancient spirit-thingy as Kaa, a serial killer as Shere Khan it’s great. He puts his own twist on the general idea of ‘Jungle Book’ (and also more or less adapting the core strength of the original stories while leaving out the iffy colonialism parts of Kipling’s work) and on typical, gothic tropes involving these creatures and you get to see this kid gradually age with each new chapter which is a trope I can’t seem to get enough of. Not for nothing but my mom actually asked if she could read a snippet of it which made her read it which made my sisters read it so all four us (sans our dad but he ain’t the reading sort usually) got into it. The power of a freaking excellent book for ya.

3. Watchmen

Is it cheating to include this? It was Time’s best 100 novels or whatever so I’ma say no. And why wouldn’t you? It’s a perfect deconstruction on superheroes and American politics and the American Dream in general, all packaged with some beautiful artwork and excellent dialogue and prose from good ol’ Rasputin himself. The symmetry of the book at times, how certain panels reflect each other either on the same page or multiple pages or spreads, also made this one of the best looking comics I’ve ever read and I don’t normally read comics, to be fair, but after reading this and seeing how far you can take the medium, maybe I’m just spoiled with how most other comics don’t go that extra mile. This is pretty much required reading in my book (haha), whether you’re a comic or superhero person or not. There’s a lot more it has to offer than just your average comic book/superhero flair.

4. Good Omens

There’s too many great books in Discworld to think of just one (and I’ve only read ten of them but even then there’s good pickings there (’Moving Pictures’ and ‘Wyrd Sisters’ might be two of my favorites so far)) so I’m going with the other Terry Pratchett book I’ve read co-written by Gaiman. I read this at pretty much the right time I think, I was still pretty obsessed with ‘The Omen’ and into those apocalypse themed stories dealing with the Antichrist and the Four Horseman and all that, plus it was some time after reading ‘The Graveyard Book’ while I was still in my Gaiman kick, so it pretty much was prime pickings for a book like this (and it eventually led to me reading Discworld, so double bonus). It’s amazing how well these two authors’ styles mesh together cuz I had to find out later who wrote which parts and who thought up what. The characters are all memorable and great takes on angels, demons, and the Four Horsemen (it was also my first taste of Discworld’s Death who is always excellent) and it’s just a funny book from cover to cover. I haven’t read it in a while but I should pick it up again (and get around to that BBC Radio adaptation they did finally).

5. Why We Broke Up

Never have I related more to a story I have no personal experience in than this one. A long, venty, break up letter from one teenage girl to her dickish ex-boyfriend and a long character study on them both and why the relationship failed. The main character feels more like me than any other character I’ve seen or read (movie buff, aspiring director for most of her life, generally awkward with a strange sense of humor) and even if you know the relationship ain’t gonna last you still sucked up in it and you wind up caring for both of them, almost borrowing the main character’s rose-tinted goggles through her ex’s shitty behavior and mannerisms. Nothing about the book, entirely written in first person, ever gave away that this was being written by a full grown man in his forties, it felt natural, it felt like what a teenage girl would write as she processes all this grief and anger and regret and that’s inspiring, it makes you want to write something like this that can speak to so many people regardless of their own dating experience or age or whatever. 

[ramialkarmi]

This former Apple prodigy just got $9.5 million from Steve Wozniak to makes robots that yank staples from documents

Alex Fielding has already had a heck of a career.

In 1996, at the age of 18, he joined Apple, where he worked on the first iMac under the just-returned cofounder Steve Jobs.

In 2001, he and Apple cofounder Steve "Woz" Wozniak started up Wheels of Zeus (abbreviated as "WoZ," get it?), a company that made GPS tags so companies could track inventory. Over the years, Fielding would go on to cofound or work at other startups with other ex-Apple execs, too.

Now, that Apple pedigree has come back into play as Fielding's newest venture, Ripcord, is officially launching with a $9.5 million dollar investment from Kleiner Perkins, Lenovo's cousin investment firm Legend Star, Lux Capital — and Steve Wozniak, the Woz himself. If that's not enough nerd cred, Ripcord is actually a NASA spinoff, too.

And what Ripcord does is run a growing factory floor populated by robots, designed to scan, store, and index tremendous piles of paper for later retrieval, ten times faster than a human could do it. Check it out:

In the short term, Fielding tells Business Insider, Ripcord is already helping publicly traded companies and law firms like Wilson Sonsini with the hassle of managing the hundreds or thousands of pages worth of information they need to keep handy for the purposes of regulatory compliance. He's planning on staffing the 30-strong company up with 100 more factory workers over the next year as demand ramps up.

In the longer term, Fielding sees Ripcord, along with the artificial intelligence powering it under the hood, as bringing about an end to paper itself.

"To me, that's a very beautiful thing," says Fielding.

No robot uprising

Fielding and his early team have no experience with what the industry calls "records management." Instead, the company was actually the result of a bet between Fielding and a friend.

Sometime in 2015, a friend of Fielding's worked in operations at a tech company that was preparing to go public, and had to retrieve the mountains of financial paperwork that needed to be filed alongside the S-1 form. That meant calling up his document services provider, and getting the last year's worth of paperwork from their specialized storage facility.

But, Fielding says, the document provider had lost the majority of his friend's required boxes, slowing down the entire process drastically until they could find replacements and backups and were able to reconstruct what was lost. Fielding was shocked that a modern company, especially a tech company, would rely so heavily on old-fashioned paper.

  "I did what any great friend would do. I teased and chided my friend," says Fielding. "'You clearly didn't get the memo; the world is going paperless.'" 

His friend "made all these excuses," says Fielding, citing the thousand dollars-plus per box that document storage companies can charge to digitize that paper. Even once the paper is digitized, Fielding says, fees can pile up. Sometimes, he says, they even charge you per keystroke to change file names or folders in their systems.

Fielding couldn't believe it, and wagered his friend a lunch that he could find some company, somewhere, that could save his friend from this ever happening again. He couldn't. And so the seed was planted for Ripcord.

The stapler problem

It sounds silly at first, but a really big part of the reason why this has never been done before are staples. Existing scanner systems require humans to pull staples, separate three-ring binders, unclip paper clips, and occasionally even unstrip duct tape before they can go through the system — otherwise they jam up the works.

"If you can use it to stick paper together, somebody has," Fielding says.

Humans can do that work, but it's tedious, and Fielding says that humans actually get worse at it over time — if you grow accustomed to removing staples from the top-left corner for eight hours a day, you're more likely to miss the one staple in the top-right. If you miss it, the system gets gunked up, and you've lost hours of work.

At the time of that fateful wager, Fielding was working at NASA as a technologist. When he explained to the NASA higher ups what he was working on, they gave him office space, access to experts, and other resources to get started. 

The reason for their excitement has everything to do with those staples. The same artificial intelligence that Ripcord's robots use to detect whether something is a paper fastener or not could be broadly applicable to its own scientific search. While self-driving cars and the like have nailed this problem at large scales, Fielding's robots are one of the few projects to try it with things as small as paperclips.

"This is an example of artificial intelligence that's not Skynet," says Fielding. "A Ripcord robot isn't going to kill you with a staple remover."

The product

So what Ripcord actually sells is pretty rare, Fielding says. You pay for the storage of your files in their cloud system, per month. That fee includes the labor of digitizing it, including a partnership with FedEx to actually bring the files to the Ripcord facility in Hayward, a short drive from San Francisco. 

It doesn't replace humans, says Fielding, since customers still set the desired organization of the digitized files themselves. It just automates the repetitive tasks of removing the staples, scanning them, making sure they were the right files, giving them a timestamp, and so on and so forth. Once it's in the cloud, customers can search through them, too.

The idea, Fielding says, is to remove any and all opposition to digitizing a company's files, rather than stashing them away with an expensive document management company that doesn't even make it easy to sift for the stuff you need. Once the documents are scanned, Ripcord recycles the paper records themselves. 

For now, it's a corporate thing. But he sees the technology being pioneered here as a way to remove our reliance on paper, removing the need to keep killing trees by photocopying the same files over and over again. He sees it as the first step towards a broader "legacy" for Ripcord.

"Nobody was really bringing the market out of the stone ages," says Fielding. 

SEE ALSO: Meet 'Professor X,' the AI genius who left his lab at Princeton to beat Uber, Google, and Intel at their own game

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