#pls tell me in the comments or smth I really need to know this

[artoodeetootired]

lowkey

📖 an f1 driver and a singer are both known for being beasts in their respective fields, but everyone knows they are ironically the shyest in reality- especially when it comes to attraction. they were hidden out of respect for their privacy, until they realised loving shouldn't be a secret.

💭 op!81 x fem!singer (smau)

🎧 lowkey - niki

🃏masterlist🃏

🫧“us in a king size, keep it a secret. say i’m ur queen, but i don’t wanna leave this lowkey.” 🫧

p.s (let's pretend the qatar and las vegas gp's are rounds 10 + 12 of 24 respectively hehe)

ynuser

Tagged: bsfuser

ynuser so... been kind of busy lately...

Liked by sabrinacarpenter, bsfuser, landonorris, and 715,069 others

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forynln U DISAPPEAR FOR 5 MONTHS AFTER UR LAST ALBUM AND POST OUTTA NOWHERE... girl u cannot keep doing this to us...

-> user1 lol watch her

-> user2 Bruh stfu she literally gave us a god sent album made of unicorn shit she doesn't owe u anything

bsfuser i hate you for telling me what's boutta go down but not let me say shit to anyone 😞

-> user3 it's ok bestie u can tell me, i won't tell anyone :)

ynluv How she is so different irl compared to her stage self still baffles me to this day.

-> user4 FR like wdym u gonna be busting out moves that get u viral then act like the sweetest creature on earth when u out here?? 😭

-> user5 duality go prr. she's probably the shyest celebrity i've ever seen.

-> user6 I can't believe she's an '03 baby.

gracieabrams omg ur orange cat

-> user6 car*

-> user7 car*

-> user8 luv u gracie

user9 orange suits yn so well

user0 lando is such a fanboy 😂

-> user| him and half the grid have been so consistent with promoting her LMAO

oscarpiastri posted a story 5m

Liked by logansargeant, landonorris, ynuser, and others

Replies

landonorris: would've been right next to u if stroll hadn't crashed again

mclaren: 👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼

user_: being very calm compared to ur reaction after lance's fiasco today LOL

logansargeant: LET'S GOOO

user@: wow our pastry posts after a century

alexalbon: oi why didnt you take lily's and my advice to post with yn's music if u asked us in the first place...

Twitter

Instagram

f1

f1 Our special guest performer and new partner for the 16th round on our calendar, Las Vegas, has been confirmed; a little fun before the racing begins! We bet you guys will like this one... 🤭

Until then, round 11 in Netherlands next weekend 🇳🇱 Stay tuned!

Liked by rihanna, katyperry, ynuser, and 795,392

View all 6,204 comments

user! omg i have been waiting for this

f1forlife istg if they bring out the same performers as before...

fanacc the amount of singers liking this post is really fucking with us LOL

alexalbon hi f1 pls tell me u listened to us and booked the grid's voted fav 😸

-> charlesleclerc agreed.

-> maxverstappen1 agreed.

-> landonorris @oscarpiastri and i will boycott.

-> oscarpiastri mate i didn't even vote.

-> landonorris okay fine but u do like yn/ln right? ...right? 🔪

-> oscarpiastri ...

-> landonorris dw everyone osc's just shy no need to cancel him

-> danielricciardo 💃🏽

-> lance_stroll wait there was a vote?

Twitter

Instagram

ynuser

ynuser switch up

Liked by racerbia, selenagomez, bsfuser, and 865,744 others

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forynln she's killing us and she knows it damn well

user pls just one hint 😭

user how do u feel about oscar piastri not liking u LMAO

arianagreenblatt gorg bestie 😩

user the aesthetic change is very sus

user ladies and gentlemen, the queen of singing, dancing, and gatekeeping

-> user the way we still pine after her and her whereabouts even though she is the most nonchalant pop girl out there

-> bsfuser she's cooking smth 🧐

-> frd2 yk smth dont u 🥸

2 weeks later...

Instagram

georgerussell63 posted a story 20sec

Liked by ynuser, f1, lewishamilton, and others

Replies

lewishamilton: why did i not see toto doing this????

ynuser: it was a pleasure meeting u too 🤠

f1: You boys are very welcome

totowolff: George...

-> georgerussell: please don't fire me

landonorris: ok but did u see the way she looked at me??

-> georgerussell lando, u know full well she was looking at someone else

-> landonorris shut up :(

-> georgerussell i will not allow u to ruin her with ur playboy antics

-> landonorris EXCUSE ME

landonorris and f1 🔁

Tagged: f1, ynuser, charles_leclerc, carlossainz55, georgerussell63, fernandoalo_official, maxverstappen1, and oscarpiastri

landonorris best. weekend. ever.

mini photo dump of the boys at the concert 'cause @ynuser actually performed for us 🤯🤯 we're such huge fans- it was epic meeting you!

Liked by racerbia, selenagomez, bsfuser, and 2,993,840 others

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landonorris p.s. oscar loves her, he's just shy

-> oscarpiastri lando u idiot

-> logansargeant i can confirm ahem

mclaren we advocated for this very hard, just so yk...

-> user0 the gods (you) have bestowed us simpletons (seriously) with such a blessing (yn and mclaren interactions)

-> userl for the whole grid? the fans? ...or a particular someone? 🤭

ynuser epic meeting me??? bro i almost fainted meeting u guys and drivers i've been a fan of since i was 10 😭😭😭

-> bsfuser how was it omg

-> ynuser LOL definitely an interesting experience...

-> landonorris omg she replied 😭

-> georgerussell bro she called u bro

user_ im convinced theyre music drunk and not substance drunk here 😮‍💨

ynuser

Tagged: f1

ynuser you all already know. this thread is as aesthetically chaotic as my mind rn.

thank you to my team for handling such a mess of me when since i got this invitation !! could not be here, or look this decent without any of u.

thank you to @f1 from the bottom of my heart. i've been such a fan since i was in nappies, nd you guys just made a dream of mine come true. from the races, new friends, to performing for such a crowd in vegas, it has been one of the most surreal weekends of my life. you all just know im gonna be clutching on to this partnership for as long as i breathe. nd congrats to @maxverstappen1, @oscarpiastri, nd @charlesleclerc on the podium ! until next time 🏎💋✨

(last slide is real footage of me meeting toto wolff)

Liked by racerbia, selenagomez, bsfuser, and 2,408,274 others

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redbullracing thank you for stopping by our pit!

-> mclaren ok but she went to ours first

-> scuderiaferrari yeah... she liked us most though. should've seen her face when she walked in.

-> mercedesamgf1 you guys know she was a long-time mercedes fan before this right??

-> landonorris what is going on? (she definitely liked hanging out with us more)

-> logansargeant lol you're so delulu (laughed way harder with my group)

oscarpiastri thank you too! we should hang out again sometime soon

-> landonorris 'hang out' pfft sure

-> user omg oscar commenting on a non-f1 person's post??? a FEMALE nonetheless????

-> oscarpiastri everyone has to chill fr

bsfuser that’s MY BESTIE

-> user she is GLOWING

-> ynimagine mommy??? sorry. mommy??? sorry.

-> user she is SNATCHED WTF

oscarpiastri

Tagged: danielricciardo, ynuser

oscarpiastri 2nd in vegas! amazing job to the team for this accomplishment, daniel for his dedication, nd yn, who we're all still star-struck by. cheers! 🍾

(credit to @pierregasly's story for second slide)

Liked by ynuser, f1, danielricciardo, and 1,329,866 others

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user guys istg i was in the paddock the whole time AND i know what i saw. so when i say they hit it off really well...

user omg oscar even picked up on her 'nd' habit 😭

ynuser 🧡🧡🧡

-> user u are actually an angel sent from the depths of hell in the best possible way. the setlist??? the body and face??? the personality???

landonorris oscar you... 😨 when did u even go to the front of the stage for that last pic????

lewishamilton cute, flirty, teenage stuff and all but are we not gonna talk about danny ric

-> danielricciardo i think we should just go back to gushing about oscar's crush

-> carlossainz55 his crush??? what am i missing????

-> charlesleclerc the baby has grown up

bsfuser 🤨

f1

Tagged: ynuser

f1 yn appreciation post 🤍🤍🤍

Could not have asked for a better performer and partner to grace us with her presence this weekend 👏🏼

Liked by ynuser, mclaren, oscarpiastri, and 3,071,008 others

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user my timeline is EXPLODING

user converting f1 fans into yn fans too

landonorris slay

-> danielricciardo slay

-> pierregasly slay

-> alexalbon slay

-> lewishamilton what is 'slay'?

-> charlesleclerc slay

-> maxverstappen1 slay

ynuser thank u thank uuu

-> user9 queen what were u on tonight??

-> {user} not even her debut was this hype 💀

ynworld STEP ON ME

f1__grid bruh this is so unecessary... she clearly just wants attention

-> user# stay pressed ur favs like her more than u <3

Twitter

3 weeks later...

oscarpiastri posted a story 10sec

Liked by ynuser, mclaren, maxverstappen1, and others

Replies

user: soooo wonder who took this photo 🧐

user: u guys got smth to tell us? ;)

alexalbon: why do u look depressed today

landonorris: where are u bro

user: what's ur fav yn song?

ynuser: im sorry i can't make it today osc :(

-> oscarpiastri: it's okay, best to let everyone cool down anyways. i'll see u next week?

-> ynuser: i promise :)

1 week later...

ynuser posted a story 30sec

Liked by bsfuser, f1, oscarpiastri, and others

Replies

lewishamilton: ayeee my fav coming over to the pit today?

-> ynuser: i wouldn't miss it for the world 😸 plus fans are dying to know how u pick ur fashion sense out

-> lewishamilton: oh lord

f1: 🤍

landonorris: pls be kind with the question this time :(

-> ynuser: aweeee

-> ynuser: no.

oscarpiastri: wya??

3 more weeks later...

oscarpiastri posted a story 16sec

Liked by nicolepiastri, mclaren, danielricciardo and others

Replies have been disabled

ynuser posted a story 37sec

Liked by bsfuser, f1, nicolepiastri, and others

Replies have been disabled

1 month, 3 races, and 2 performances later...

~3 months later...

oscarpiastri

Tagged: ynuser

oscarpiastri i can't take it anymore. since u guys have wanted to know, anyway.

you've been on my mind since the day i met you (nd yes, admittedly since lando showed me your music videos), nd then when i met you with the biggest crush, i quickly decided that you are one of the most talented, beautiful, kindest people ever. fuck all if i just got my first win, it wouldn't have meant anything without u. i can't have asked for a better partner in crime to wear my number at the races.

although we've been pretty great at keeping it low key these past few months to just family and friends, i wanna show you off, my love x

Liked by ynuser, landonorris, mclaren, and 5,329,866 others

View all 35,853 comments

oscarpiastri also, ty to the grid for keeping it private, nd yes, i will be treating u all for dinner.

-> danielricciardo LFGGGGG

user oh my god.

jennaortega the question is if she beat him at karting

-> oscarpiastri she did...

carlossainz55 i never thought this day would come

landonorris cant put both my happiness and bewilderment that you actually hard launched into words

-> georgerussell character. development.

user ONE OF MY FAV SINGERS BECAME MY FAV WAG TOO AHHHHHHHH

arianagrande y'all cute asf 😭😭😭

user I CALLED IT

-> user nah dont u lie we all thought we were lying to ourselves LMAO

bsfuser one wrong move and i’ll send stroll to do more than just hit u on track 😺

-> oscarpiastri ;-;

-> maxverstappen1 u could send any one on the grid to do it, and they'd be happy to

user they're so in love im bawling

landonorris just so u guys know, his three sisters steal her away from him every week to hang out LOL

-> oscarpiastri that was totally unecessary

-> nicolepiastri give the ppl what they want ossie

Comments on this post have been limited.

ynuser

Tagged: oscarpiastri

ynuser sike.

'orange suits yn so well'... damn right for him 🧡

this man has inspired me in too many ways, that aside from teaching me how to love and be loved. it's been pretty hard having all these memories, but not being able to live them freely because of the pressure. but i wouldn't do it with anyone else. so im gonna be 'showing you off' in my latest single, agora hills, coming out tomorrow night for my love's first win x

(to clarify, f1 has allowed me to take ONE side ONCE, so im not jobless :) ... yet)

Liked by oscarpiastri, dojacat, bsfuser and 6,001,685 others

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frd1 about fucking time

oliviarodrigo this is so cute omg

alexalbon ahem i think i should get some credit for being the ultimate matchmaker here

-> f1 actually, i think it all goes to us.

-> user 💀

logansargeant THE LAST PHOTO PLS SEND IT TO ME LMAO

gracieabrams omg him with her cat 😭😭

-> user gracie, luv, it's car*

-> user car*

-> sabrinacarpenter dw babes i don't get this shit either

user oscar first win AND yn new music AND hard launches from the softest ppl ever??? has the universe finally decided to bless me???

user they were literally meant to be

user what happened to the shy versions of themselves oml

tatemcrae the hottest, most sincere, and talented celebrity couple rn

bsfuser and i was there to witness it all 😌

-> charlesleclerc so was i

-> bsfuser i was first tho

-> charlesleclerc fair enough

-> landonorris i was there the most

-> bsfuser i was their couple counsellor

-> landonorris i was their matchmaker

-> alexalbon NO YOU WERENT

-> bsfuser i was first to find out

-> landonorris no you werent

-> landonorris right? @oscarpiastri @ynuser

-> landonorris RIGHT????

Comments on this post have been limited.

ynuser

Tagged: oscarpiastri

ynuser for u, ur first win, and to many more.

as an extra for u all, 'lowkey' is also out to show my progression from wanting to keep it a secret to having him make me scream his name <3 hope u love us as much as i do.

Liked by oscarpiastri, dojacat, bsfuser and 6,581,921 others

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user the caption???????????????????

user holy shit mother is mothering and father is fathering because never have i ever heard her make a track with sm detail about her partner in it...

-> user FR like where did the two of them go?? almost 8 months but they come back like they've aged a decade

-> user NO CAUSE WTF is 'suck a little dick in the bathroom, who that man with the big strong hands'???? miss yn??? are the both of u feeling okay????

-> user you'd think introvert + introvert = coma, but ig double negatives still apply here

dojacat bitch these tracks SLAP

user okay but osc's guns 👀

sza god, when will this shi happen to me?

mclaren All ur songs on repeat in the paddock.

-> mercedesamgf1 It's true, all the teams agreed

-> redbullracing (the only time we all agree)

user how tf did we get bashful yn and blushing osc to... this??

-> ynuser life's full of mysteries.

landonorris i miss the person i was before hearing these two songs...

-> georgerussell it's true, as big of a fan i am of the two of u, some things are meant to stay between ppl...

-> charlesleclerc i am not saying anything, which means i can get invited to the wedding, yeah?

-> ynuser yes.

-> oscarpiastri yes.

Comments on this post have been limited.

a/n: as u can probably see, i lowkey gave up half way cause i never realised how much work this takes :,)

[juneberrie]

DATING APPLEJACK !

request || equestria girls!apple jack x fem!reader

author's note: everyone say thank you to mars for encouraging my delusions & to the person who requested this. also ive been picturing her the way @/cloiiiiii on tiktok draws her so like yeah

ⓘ word count : 0.8k || applejack masterlist

probably didn't realize she liked you until someone (rarity) told her

"what? no way, i don't like-" and then the "HOLY SHIT I DO LIKE HER!"

she was the last to know

rainbow and rarity have to give her advice on asking you out (rarity's is serious and helpful, dash's is just "ask her out dumbass")

probably asked you out with flowers.

"so uh– i was wondering' if you'd, uh, y'know, wanna go out with me sometime? it's fine if not– y'know what, nevermind its stupi–"

she's so nervous!!!

anyways onto the actual dating hcs

she was the one to say i love you first

you guys were probably taking a walk or something and you were talking and she'll like smile at you really lovingly and go "i love you, y'know"

calls you really cheesy nicknames — sugar, sugar cube, pretty girl, my girl, princess, angel, darlin', missy, sweetheart, sweet pea, honey, etc etc

would take you on the cutest dates!!!

sunsets, picnics, apple picking (duh), late night drives

if u like shopping then she's def the kind of girl who'll hold all your bags

she'll also walk you to all your classes / walk you home

also!!! kind of gf who won't leave u alone in public. like if you guys go out she WILL stay with you at all times cause yk 😕

she's such a sweetheart

will open doors for you and get offended if you try to do ANYTHING yourself

SHE WAS RAISED RIGHT 🗣

can and will give you her clothes to wear. PLEAAASE wear her flannels/shirts around her she will lose her mind

"well, darlin', don't you look nice?" whenever u get dressed up

she either gets flustered really easily or she doesnt

pls imagine her in like. a white tank and jeans and cowboy boots

1 million dead 4923 injured

her voice in the morning >>>>>

it has a little rasp and her accent is like ten times thicker and just ugh

she's jacked btw. apple jacked.

she grew up up a farm like what'd u expect

anyways imagine needing to get smth off a shelf or something and she just comes up behind you and reaches to grab the thing and her arms ohmygod

love languages are definitely acts of service & quality time

CONSTANTLY doing little things for you

holding open the door, getting you flowers every week, randomly cleaning your room when she's at your house, filling up ur drink, ordering for you, etc

such a "my girl" kind of gf

"attagirl" "my girl" "pretty girl" "sweet girl"

randomly gives u compliments

also!! i don't see her as the kind of gf who comments under ur insta posts but she's def the kind who'll post them on her story

she's not a very social media person in general, but any post she does make is probably of you

would def write you a sappy letter on your anniversary/valentines/christmas/new years/your birthday

basically any chance she gets she'll write u a long, sappy letter telling you how much she appreciates you and loves you and yap yap yap

i don't see her as a person who wears much jewelry, but i can definitely see her having a locket with your picture in it, or some kind of matching bracelet

randomly starts yapping about you to the girls

"she's so sweet and i love her an–" "SHUT UP WE GET IT." "dang okay"

they're your biggest fans!!!

pinkie probably made a fan account on insta thats just her posting cute pictures of you guys

rarity helps applejack plan dates and shit

dash playfully flirts with you any chance she gets because she finds it hilarious when aj glares at her

speaking of that, i can't see her being someone who gets jealous super super easily?

like, i can definitely see her sidling up beside you, putting an arm around your waist, and glaring at the person who's flirting with you

"who's this, darlin'?"

she has an rbf so if you're really sunshine-y you guys look ridiculous tg

scary guard dog gf!!!!

such an early riser but if you ask her to stay in bed with you she'll be so dramatic about it (she'll sigh and be like "alright, alright, but just this once" <- its happened multiple times)

apple bloom adores you!!! she'll randomly barge into aj's room to talk to you (aj thinks its cute how much she likes you but she does NOT appreciate her sister's interruption)

100% your biggest supporter

if you do theatre or choir or orchestra, she'll show up to EVERY. SINGLE. PERFORMANCE. you will ever have

if you do sports, trust she'll be at all your games yelling her head off and holding a big ass sign

she's really good at cooking so she'll learn how to make your favorite dishes!!! this also means you guys have cute little dinners at home a lot <3

© juneberrie 2024 – reblogs are appreciated!!!

[spampai]

Posting this so I can ramble-

Sorry if I sound down at the moment; just a negative outlook, overthinking and brain inducing pain:

I shoudln’t think like this, because my content is for people to enjoy, love and be a community on, but it’s been in my head since day 1 from 4 years ago: How do people get so famous? (As in being loved by the community at a larger margin)

I feel like I’m not getting as much as before, probably because it’s either I’m still a small artist or I don’t put more quality into my arts, or idk maybe I’m not constantly posting or smth?? I have a habit of checking Tumblr after 30 mins to see the algorithm and expecting people to like it or enjoy my content but it seemed dead these days. I usually never really cared, but as for my manga I did, ‘cause I know I put lots of effort into it, but in comparison to my other posts, it’s not that enticing. Is there a reason why? Am I promoting it too much because of my own excitement, or did people skim through because they thought it was the previous post? Idk, I can’t figure it out, I just can’t.

I did thought to myself that a few numbers on the screen means a lot of people irl, and that I’m just overthinking. Yes, I KNOW I’m not as large as any artists these days, and I know they didn’t start off famous as well. So if I want to be my own celebrity in here, I gotta keep pushing. Pls tell me in the comments or reblogs on what u think. How do you feel in this situation; how do u push through it, ‘cause I need the advices at the moment.

Have the link to the manga to anyone who even cares before the next one drops, idk I’m not feelin’ it rn:

[jessejamestheoutlaw]

JJ Maybanks fic prompts.ideas

some of these may be silly or stupid (kinda lots of ooc), but pls don't judge, dm me or leave the link in the comments if you use any of these pls!

JJ sometimes visits his dad in a form of self-destruction/self-harm, so now that his dad is gone, he doesn't know how to deal with or process his emotions - this could be used in many ways, but my main idea is that JJ is depressed after they get the gold (after pogue-landia or being "alone"), so he kinda shuts down or smth

During 1x05 when John B. and Kiara start slapping the mosquitos, The pogues involve all of each other In the activity, but it triggers JJ or he gets worried about the pogue's continual fighting

Barry or one of Luke's dealers has a problem with Luke and can't find him or smth and takes it out on JJ, maybe by beating him or badgering him for money - this could be REALLY dark, or simply hurt/comfort

JJ insults one of his friends on accident and has anxiety and regret over it - that's it, but I feel like you can do a lot with it, create different reactions, and display the inner workings of the pogue's relationships

A parallel to the Sarah and Kiara scene where they tricked them onto the boat to solve their fighting, what if Big John did the same thing when JJ and John B were having a huge fight as kids. I think that Big John is irresponsible enough to do it and the boys would be petty enough as kids to need it. Ik it was pope's idea, but I think it would be so cute to see the little pogues.

Barry going to attack JJ to get his revenge but ends up seeing him getting beat by a kook or smth and relating to him bc of when Ward beat him or smth in his past (even just the relation of kooks vs pogues). I think that the development and atmosphere of the fic would be interesting.

I would DIE for a fic abt when jj was little and his parents both were in love with each other (like only had eyes for eachother and had the rest of their life planned out together) and they were eating dinner or some other normal family things and his parents were talking about their dreams of moving to Yucatan, and that is one of jj's favorite moments with his family and he remembers that as his parents perfect dream (before drugs took over their life and they abandoned/abused him), sooo I think that that alone would be beautiful, or you could add how he always want to go to Yucatan to solve their problems, because he thought that Yucatan would solve his mom and dad's struggles. Ik this was confusing, but if you understand, this would be beautiful 🤩

This may be confusing, but in the seen where he fights back against his dad and has the wrench held up and says "well I ain't scared of you no more" what if his dad usednto threaten him with tools or if he really did, so jj is taking the high road or is just like having flashbacks or smth - this one is kinda stupid and a real stretch, but I feel like Luke could have hit jj with one of his tools bc jj interrupted his work or something. Idkkk y'all

This is more of a headcanon, but I love the idea of jj being named Jesse James after his mom (Jessica - her name isn't mentioned in the show) if you wanna make it a fic, it could be abt him being bullied for having a girls name and his mom comforting him or abt his dad telling him that he will never live up to her name - I read a fic (I don't remember the name, but it COULD have been 'mental Polaroids', but idk) and Luke was yelling abt jj having the same "fucking weepy-ass eyes' as his mom

This is again just another headcannon, but jj has younger brother energy sometimes, and I think he was born in June or August for some reason - probably the youngest of the pogues, maybe celebrating his birthday ro smth

I think we can all agree that John b. is sometimes an ass-hat, so maybe a fic abt him getting reeaaaalllly drunk and upset over his dad in season 1 and trying to fight jj bc jj was insensitive or for another reason

[multifandomworldsposts]

Hey I was wondering if you could do a Austin Butler x virgin reader like she's a young French student in LA and she runs into 31 year old Austin late at night so he asks her what she's doing so late alone in the street and he walks her home then she asks if he wants to drink smth they talk a bit and then it gets hot...

(I love your writing btw)

fais moi l’amour

A/N: first off, thank you 🫶🏻 & hope everyone enjoys this story!

Pairing: Austin Butler x fem!reader

Warning: making out, him being a hot ass, oral sex, protected sex (PLS be safe), a lot of french.

Y/N’s POV

I got accepted to UCLA for my photography majors, so I have to go to Los Angeles to finish up my degree. I leave my friends from France and I’m obviously going to miss them because I don’t know anyone from America. I bought an apartment and I’m so excited to see it in real life, I did a digital tour of the apartment.

I fly out to LAX and everything looks beautiful! I get to my apartment and it looks amazing with a cool view of Downtown Los Angeles. I get unpacking and I take a little nap so I can go walk around and get groceries for myself.

I go to Whole Foods Market to get some things I need to make something for myself for a while. The staff were really nice, some people could understand my french accent and they understood on what I was coming from.

I get back home and organized my food and my alcohol, I’m 22 okay and I can handle my liquor. I put my alcohol at the bar I have in my apartment. My apartment looks good so far! I get ready to go out to see what LA is really about.

8:09 PM

I walk around to find a bar somewhere and I find Catch One, it looks interesting so I get in the line and immediately I hear whistling when I walking to the back of the line. God, american men, they’re fucking gross!

I finally get in and try to find the bar, I find it. I got sit down and a bartender comes up to me.

“What do you want princess?”

“Vodka please.”

“Alright.” He makes my drink.

I look around to see what’s going on until I hear my drink behind me, I turn around and I thanked the guy.

“That accent, you’re not from here.” The bartender asks.

“Yeah I transferred here from Paris.”

“You sound beautiful.”

“Je vous remercie.”

10:30 PM

I leave the club. I had a fun time, met wonderful people, I already have friends from Los Angeles and they are so nice!

I decided to walk, I drank one vodka, it doesn’t affect me. I look around on how beautiful LA is until I feel someone’s hand on my shoulder. I turn around and see the most beautiful man I’ve ever seen.

“Hi, I’m Austin and I just wanted to say how beautiful you are.” He smiles. The most sweetest smile I’ve seen a long time.

“Thank you Austin.” I blush.

“I know this will sound creepy but, why are you walking all alone at this time at night?” He itches his head.

“Well, Austin, my apartment is close on where we’re at right now.” I look at him.

“Do you want me to walk with you if something happens?”

I trust him. “Yeah sure.”

We began to walk and we started to talk about ourselves.

“Y/N, that accent? Where are you from?”

“You like the 9th person who asked me that.” I look at him while walking.

“I’m sorry.”

“It’s okay, I’m from France.”

“France really! I visited there a couple times, it’s so beautiful.”

“I mean I feel like a lot of french girls would love you.” I said smiling.

I can tell he loved the comment.

MY APARTMENT

“Do you want to come inside?” I said to him.

“Yeah sure, if that’s okay with you?”

“It’s okay with me.”

I unlock my door and allow Austin to go inside first.

“You just moved here?” He looks at me.

“Yeah, I got groceries, some decorations and some alcohol.” I look at him while getting my jacket off and put my keys on the counter.

“What type of alcohol do you have?” He leans on the island.

“Vodka, Champagne, Whiskey and Wine.” I walked up to him.

“I like the whisky Y/N.” He smirks.

“Go to the couch and I’ll get our drinks.” Austin walks to the couch and I start making the drinks.

I walk up to him with his whisky, he grabs it gently out of my hand. I sit next to him.

“So, why did you travel here?” Austin says. He drinks his whisky and puts it down on my coffee table.

“Well, I’m majoring in Photography and I’m trying to finish my degree and UCLA accepted me. So that’s why I moved here.”

“Are you good at photography?” He looks at me.

“I believe so. Would you like me to take a picture of you?” I drink my vodka at bit.

“I would love you to Y/N.” He leans closer to me.

“Alright.” I go get my camera and come back to see Austin shirtless. I think I can’t handle this.

“Take a picture, it’ll last longer.” He smirks again.

I smirk, I take a few pictures. He looks so photogenic.

When I was done taking pictures of him, I showed him the pictures.

“You’re really good at this.” He says.

“Thank you Austin.” I look at him then to my camera.

“Speak a little french to me Y/N.” He whispers in my ear.

“Je suis amoureuse d’un homme qui s’appelle Austin Butler.” I said in french.

“What did you say?” He questions.

“I said ‘I’m in love with a man name Austin Butler.’”

“You’re in love with me?” He makes me look at him by putting his right hand on my chin to make me look at him.

“I am, when I saw you the first time, I couldn’t take my eyes off of you.”

The way he looks at me, he’s in love with me as well. He leans in and kisses me. I kiss him back. I put my camera on my coffee table and get on top of him. I take my shirt off. He puts his hands on my waist. I look down to see his belt and unbuckle his belt and unzips his pants. I can tell he’s ready for me. He flips me down on the couch so he could be on top of me. He unzips my pants as well.

I lean up to his ear and said, “Je veux que tu me baises comme les hommes américains baisent les femmes américaines.”

“What do you say honey?” He questions.

I look at him and say, “I want you to fuck me like you american men fuck american women.”

“Do you have a condom?” He asks.

“In my room, it’s the last door in the hallway next me.”

He gets off of me and goes to my room. He comes back really quick with a condom in his hand.

“You found them quick.” I sit comfortably on the couch.

“They were easy to find babe, just on your nightstand.”

I forgot to put them away somewhere safe.

“By the way, are you a virgin?” He looks at me.

“Yes I am.” I confess.

“Then we have to take this slow Y/N.”

I nod.

“If I were you, give this french girl a kiss and give her the time of her life by fucking her.”

Austin looks at me and straddles my waist, gets his underwear off, he’s huge. He gets the condom on. I try to get my panties off, he helps me out of them. He leans down to kiss me.

The way he goes in and out of me, it’s feels so good. I felt a lot of pain but it went away. He pick me up to take me to my bedroom but he makes us stop on the wall a few feet away from my room. He lifts me up, I wrap my legs around his waist. He kisses my neck, I can feel him bitting me. I moan but screamed.

“What did you just do Aus?” I make him look at me.

“I gave you a hickey.”

I try to give him a hickey as well. The way he moaned.

“I feel like you just gave me a hickey Y/N.”

I giggle.

“Je voulais juste que tu te senates bien Austin.” I whisper in he’s ear.

“What baby?”

“I said, I just wanted to make you feel good Austin.”

“God your french is turning me on.” We did nose to nose.

I giggle again.

“If that’s what turns you on, guess what turns me on Austin.” I touch his hair.

He pretends to think. “Me giving you hickeys.”

“No.”

“Hmm, me touching you.”

“No.” I chuckle.

“Then what Y/N?”

“Your deep voice in my ear while we were on my couch, having sex.” I whisper in his ear.

“It’s puberty baby.” He holds me close.

“Fais moi l’amour.”

He looks at me confused.

“Make love to me Austin.”

He takes me to my bedroom. He lays me down on my bed. I sit up. He crawls up to me, lays me down on my bed. He began to fuck me harder then when we were on couch. I scream.

“You like that huh?” He continues to fuck me.

“Yes! Ah fuck!” I said scratching his back.

Serveral minutes later I flip us over so I can be on top of him. I still have him inside me. I readjust myself so I can feel him in a different position.

“I thought you were a virgin?” He looks at me.

“I am but, you know that porn exists right?”

“You french girls really do know what to do.” He looks at me.

He leans up to get closer to me, we make out, I start to french kiss him. He french kisses me. He sets me on the bed again to give me love bits on my body.

1:30 AM

We’re in my bed, heavy breathing, sweating.

“Y/N.” He looks at me.

“Yeah.” I look at him.

“How did that felt by being your first time?”

“Étonnante.”

He looks confused again.

“Amazing.”

“Let’s be more than just a hookup Y/N/N.” He heavy breathed.

“Please Aus.”

“I’ll show you what I’m really about. You saw a different part of me tonight.” He cuddles up to me.

“Same here Austin and I’ll teach you some french so you can understand on what I’m saying.” I wrap my arms around him.

“When’s your first day at UCLA?”

“Next Wednesday.”

“I’ll show you around LA and maybe drop and pick you up at school.”

“I would love that Austin.”

“Um, Y/N?” He questions.

“How old are you?”

“22, you?”

“31.”

“I feel like I just, baisé un papa de sucre.”

“Did you say something bad?”

“I said, fucked a sugar daddy.”

“Because of me being older than you?”

“Austin I still love you.”

“Do you care that I’m a few years older than you?”

“I don’t care baby. I just know that you treated me so special.”

“I’m glad you think that way.”

“No one made me feel this way in Paris, you’re the only man in America that makes feel that way.”

[kaycode1999]

Hii this is like my first time commenting anything on tumblr so pls be nice, I tried. 😢 I think I’d like a mha and/or jjk pairing. (Mha if twos too much, sorry!!)

My personality, Im really indecisive. Like one second I’ll be super happy and then the next I’m bawling my eyes out. Ouhh I’m very judgemental, though I don’t always voice my opinions. I’m extremely quiet with people I don’t know or don’t talk to usually, on the other hand I’m literally the biggest extrovert with people I love. Oh I’m also an ISTJ-T. People call me really smart but I don’t think I’m all that, a lot of people have high expectations for me and it lowk stresses me tf out. I love music with my life oh mygod, I have like 4 different playlists with all different types of genres and I listen to them daily, at school, at home, in the shower, when im with friends, literally whenever I can. Oh can you tell I love to talk a lot lmao

I’m a female, she/her, idk abt sexuality but i slightly prefer guys more. For physical appearance, im 5’0 (153cm). I dyed my hair like a wine red but it’s fading out so my hair is like in between that and black. My hairs like medium length, it reaches the middle of my back yk. I have really dark brown eyes, and tan skin. I’m also more on the slim side

Im like a mix of styles honestly, it depends what I’m feeling like that day and where I’m going. I have a lot of clothes but they mainly consist of trousers and like rlly tight tops. (I like showing off my waist) (A few hoodies too cuz yk british weather)

I spend most of my time on my phone. Mainly to study or read something, maybe watch TikTok or anime, I also draw sometimes (rarely). I would go out on like walks or smth if my parents weren’t so strict..

*Based on the context clues I got you seem young, so I want to pair you with people presumably around your age. However, If I am wrong I can do it over*

Jujutsu Kaisen

I match you with

Yuji Itadori

My Hero Academia

I match you with

Eijiro Kirishima

Both of these sweethearts adore you so much and won’t judge you for your mood swings

They both thought it was cute how you were all quiet and shy when they first met you, but they loved it even more when you opened up to them

You can think you’re not all that all you want, these two sweethearts will never stop telling you how much they care about you and how awesome you are

They are there for you if you’re stressed, if you need to get your favorite candy/ice cream they’re treat! If you need to stay in your room covered in blankets just to get away from everything for a while they’ll make sure you’re comfortable and even bring you something to drink or a snack

They both like just hanging out and listening to music with you

[kyojurismo]

hi could i sumbit an emergency rq?

i've been struggling w/ my home situation on and off for a few years, and now it's been going on again for a few months and feel like i can't do shit right lol (nothing too bad luckily!! but its draining ... ig)

could u please write smth abt the reader meeting douma and them going away w him?

whisk me awaay douma!! lmao

pls give other emergency requests priority if u so wish! i'm alrdy happy w looking forward to smth heh 💞

# douma (upper tank two)

tags : gn!reader, douma not eating a human 🫢, he’s sweet alright, lemme know if i missed something, not proofread as always.

a/n : hello anon! i genuinely like this req hehe ^_^ i know it’s short ( and it prob doesn’t make any sense and it’s pure shit ) but i hope you’ll enjoy it anyway <3

it was rare for douma to wander around too much

but he got bored so there he was

you were running into the woods that night, before bumping into something

“oh dear, are you alright?” the moment you met his face you noticed the way he was grinning at you, his fangs on full display. his eyes looked strange, but you like how colourful they were. of course you didn’t know about demons hehe

“do you know how to speak?” douma tilted his head to the side, looking at you with pity. “yes, sir…”

the tone of your voice was soothing

“tell me, where are you going all alone in the night?”

you explained why you were running and all, douma seemed to genuinely care about your situation and proposed to come with him at the paradise cult

lowkey would have done so anyway, lol

like not kidnapping but probably gaslighting you into believing it was best for you and what you really wanted

anyway .

douma told you everything about him and his cult, but didn’t mention him being a demon

[ manga readers — me — be shaking rn ]

he promised to protect you

to provide for your every need

basically to take care of you

OH! he spoiled you, of course

you were his darling

he spent 24/7 with you

literally dragged about how he saved you from your past life to his disciples

he was very proud of it ngl

he would fall in love with you at some point but never realise it lol

but i believe he would genuinely care for you and would never think about harming you or anything

you eventually found out he’s a demon, but he never confessed what was on his diet [ women ], he just said “i don’t eat the same food as you,” smirk smirk

we don’t care alright, it was his business so we’re gonna ignore everything about it

reblogs & comments are super appreciated! thank you for taking your time reading it, i hope you enjoyed it. have a good day / night <3

[kithtaehyung]

oh gosh, i just saw the dash and felt the need to say some things:

first and foremost, i love and appreciate all of you here. seriously, this has not changed since the very very beginning.

there was some talk about people leaving because of lack of engagement/interaction, and i did mention smth in the tags about how silence may not be enough. in regards to this, y’all don’t have to worry about me specifically! i know we have a ton of fun here and will welcome anyone that decides to join in on the chaos. that was more of a blanket statement bc of the reasons i saw people stating in their goodbye posts. it was really hard to see as a creator, bc these things do take time and energy. if you saw that and it hurt to read, i apologize. the intent was only to put out a truth that people in all fandoms have gone through—and not just writers. gfx/gif creators, too.

that being said, i also know engagement takes time and energy, as well. a lot. i’ve written both small and large comments and understand that it can be just as draining, especially if you got a lot to say to multiple writers! this is exactly why i cherish any engagement whatsoever bc you?? took time out of your day to say that to me? holy shit. hell yeah i’m gonna reply with the same amount of energy when i get the chance. but if you can’t do so, for whatever reason, i’m still grateful. no pressure, no obligation! this is a safe space and you can come sit and vibe without saying a damn thing whenever.

main point: i’m here to share what makes me happy and have fun with y’all, and having you here is enough. reading and moving on with your day, liking, commenting, anything—it will never be taken for granted. again, if anything you saw from me specifically hurt in any way, i apologize and will know moving forward. pls tell me if it does happen, too! if anything i do makes you uncomfortable, let me know and i’ll listen and make it right.

[earlysunshines]

⚠️ WARNING - long ask ahead, don't tell I didn't warn, sorry in advance guys 🤟

IM ERWITING THIS AS I GO ON THE FIC, which means omw to work, which means ill be all day thinking of this dani BC THE "the woman has a few moles on the right side of her face" GOT ME GOOOD yeees I love mo dani little moles sooo much.

(this all may be out of place? is just comments bc I'll probably explode if I dont write it down already so,,,

A CHET BAKER CD?? OUCH you have a good taste (played jazz for a while after it cause I was already wanting to hear since hanni recent live listening to the lp she brought, that was such a great live)

loved the way you played with the shelter 'care' word bc of the kang going first AND it was so funny haerin going like "your girl is just that way if you want to know" she is a little menace

ok so beach jazz scene, just got chills from them looking at each other and singing the same line cause I put to play the song too yk immersion, AND ARRURGH THE slip up and calling dani beautiful oh pls n dani still staring like i can imagine her goofy little teasing smile at yn bc of It oh oh they're so in love,, im just getting started aren't I?

yn just noticing dani has been talking about her when minji mentioned likejjhh giiirl I knew since haerin mentioned the same line dani had said about yn eyes. n ooooh you didn't continue the twinflame book c'mon (loved the bit of it)!!! it was getting interesting

also really important part; the way you always highlight the action of dani tilting her head squeezes my chest everytime i. swear . im weak for it

THEY KSSED 😭😭😭oh dani's tatto they're- WELL THEY KISSED !!! UARGH cuties

okaywait was so engaged reading that I forget this here, so the bathroom scene remind ME about the time thing, tbh I think you did this all fluffy scenes on purpose making us forget abt the plot, funny how wait this about to be big, like since when I read the summary I got surprised with this concept of death time tattoo, usually is 'time until you meet your soulmate' kinda of thing SO never read this plot before AND since the start I was like, afraid? of finishing this one like idk it it all comes to a end yk? idk shit you made me thoughtful, going back to read

OOP CLOSE THE DOOR??🫣? IM SEATED oh to hold danielle waist and and...😔 "maybe im your twin flame"YOURE😭MO DANI 😭 YOU ARE arhg youre giving me anxiety my dear writer

NOO YN don't isolate yourself oh if you're giving us another heartbroken dani im about to cry

LAST THEN 48 HOURS??? WAIITWAIT I want my fluffy where is fufflism

just thinking abt hyein ms lee and haerin starring at yn like 'is she dead??' gave me such a good laugh ngl

oh you... you made they death day on 722? ah....I swear I thought they were going to die without knowing abt they're soulmates like urgagrhggggsgghh lemme finish this up

before I cry with this little happy alternative universe I wanna say that I LOVED the way everything evolves around the beach, like since her parents till yn on th way of dyin,g it felt so right, the 'day off' where they spent all day gave me a thought like 'oh ms.lee surely planned it bc she knew dani walked on the morning' for me it was planned☝️🤓 (beabadoobee - beaches) <3

...to be honest I dont even know what to say to this one bc this all was just comments so yeah..im...this was good, good. literally spend all my shift thinking about finishing this one, the concept really got me good,, I.. maybe smth personal but i've been so...overloaded for a while so this one hitted soo close and made me want to,, live.. I think I just need a mo dani marsh in my life too

anyways😮‍💨 #really great, #changed my life, #made me cry, they're so many thoughts going on as a write this.. you're truly amazing. wish you a amazing day/week/weekend you deserve the best only!! 🫶

-with many admiration, 🤟

for this long wonderful lovely feedback i will provide. alonnnggg. reply and details plus insights HOORAAY im so glad to hear from u i absolutely love your responses u make me smile always

NO YWAAHAH HER MOLES I LOVE THEEMEMM they’re my fav feature other than her long eye lashes and smile and wait i love every feature muahahhaha

i loooove chet baker i have a like 8 hour playlist that has a lot of his music on there along with others ima. fiend for jazz i live for jazz festivals omfg and i need to find clips of hanni listening to music what!! i didn’t know this happened on her live…

no bc my fav thing ab these fics is that it’s lit up to me i thought i was the funniest person adding “kangs kare” im so #wordplay put me in coach

OMFG JAZZ Scene has some more behind it actually no it doesn’t i lied but basically i was like trying to just write and listen and the jazz playlist was lit on and CHET BAKER played and it was it’s always you and omfg i just ugh i started daydreaming and stopped writing for a moment LLOOL idk jazz makes me really lovey and dovey and emotional i think it’s beautiful it’s like a warm embrace or your lover tracing their fingers over your skin

aahahhshdh i think dani si the type of person to not shut up ab someone she likes and like she won’t even know she likes them yet but everyone around her knows LOL and mmmm detail the first thing dani said was “you have pretty eyes” and i tried to make that the first thing she said in the ending bc they’re twin flames and shit and aahhh repetition and similarity in universes … i’m rambling

ALSO this is so embarassing i had to literally search the difference between soulmates and twin flames and read a small article about twin flames and EVEN WORSE i had to make it sound professional and whatnot bc i had to quote on quote make a book in my fic ?-?:?: if yk what im saying but yeah that was a pain… cannot go on any longer i started making shit up FORREAAALLL all of that was pulled out of my ass i swear

NO BC PPL TILTINT THEIR HESDA IS SO IMPORTANT TO ME AND JUST PERKING YHRIR HEADS LIKE ANY MOVEMENT OF PPLS HEADA is so special to me it shows attention to details and emotion and desire to KNOW and be present in the moment and it’s just… so reassuring despite it being such a small gesture and i have realized over the years that i do it subconsciously with people i love and strangers that i click withINLVOE TJAT DETAIL i will use it in every fic ever idc if it’s repetitive i don’t care. i often tilt my head and whatnot bc im actually very nonverbal in real life usually (im just tired all the time) so i usually hum or give short responses and use my head to gesture the rest of what i need to convey liek this is so important to me guys…

I LOOOOVE writing kissing scenes but also no bc they get repetitive and yeah and also that tattoo hehehehsjwhhd i had to soft launch dani having the same tattoo LOL

i tried to make the whole death thing a little less repetitive and kind of brush over it until it got worse and worse and more serious and the whole concept was cheaply influenced by a movie where the two love interests know that they’re dying bc of their sickness but then i added a set, concrete date for dani and yn to die LOL idk lowk my creative juices were being juiced with this one… i was THINKING … and yeah i tried to fit in as many details and things that you’d have to remember form the beginning or middle idk i just rly like how i structured this one (the pacing is stilll iffy to me but wtv( bc i tried to have things tie together well and whatnot

makeout scene had me giggling and blushing while reading it was inspired by the anon who sent a makeout ask like smth ab “imagine making out w dani for the first time” and originally it wasn’t going to be there but i think it added to their bond and tension and lalalala yeah

no i couldn’t make them.die without knowing they’re meant to be but i had to try to figure out how to make the reveal angsty and i was like might as well have them figure out before they die and SOEAKJNG OF WHICH it took me a good amount of time while at work and making drinks to think of a way for them to die idk this story was so spontaneous and changed a lotLOL

and yes the whole beach thing was lowk inspired by summer strike bc i like the small town environment and how cute the beach is i haven’t even finished the drama im on ep like eight and haven’t watched since a few months ago LOL but i think the beach is just so calming and small towns r just sooo relaxing and nice compared tot he city (that being said i will always be a city girl…) idk beach city energy is just so wonderful and fits dani bc she grew up in newcastle and her whole vlog kinda gave me ideas for the world building and whatnot

i’m glad u love it!! and also just to mention ab the whole personal thing and living

i project a lot into my work and what i put down on the doc. idk if u can tell but i see a lot of beauty in things because i feel like its not worth dying if youre missing out on the intimacy of being loved and loving back plus just general interactions and platonic bonds built (ex: hyein and mrs lee) so like ywaaahh im glad you want to live!! there’s so much out there to experience and trust i understand exactly how u feel i looooowk have a lot of my own problems but writing helps me point out my dreams and things i find wonderful which makes me happy and then ppl enjoy the things that i romanticize and it makes me so so so so happy LOL

did u actually cry like many ppl r saying they cried or shed a tear and idk if i beleive it bc is it REALLT. that sad and emotional (maybe i just critics my writing tm) but yeah IM SO HAPPY THAT U ENJOYED!!!

u have a great week too you’re so sweet and i always love seeing your asks and feedback seriously, thank u!!!!

[novolocus]

• Master Post •

Hello, I’m Stray/ Queen/ Ross

I’m an artist of many kinds from 2d to 3d and more (my 2d things specifically for mass effect are on @straypurplebread )

I’m an agender person and pansexual with a little bit of curiosity for my more masculine no genders (hehe). So please respect me.

I post whenever I want to and however I want to. This place isn’t really open for minors for sure if they’re under the age of 16.

• Do I take commissions? •

Yes, please check the status of my commissions here

• Where else can you find me? •

I’m on every possible social media, Novolocus is a branch of my main account named StrayPurpleBread.

Instagram: Novolocus

Twitter: Novolocus

Discord: StrayPurpleBread

Discord server: in maintenance

YouTube: Novolocus (in maintenance)

For info for SPB go to @straypurplebread

• My tags •

#Novolocus

#Novolocuscomm

#Novolocustxt

#Novolocuswip

#Straypurplebread

#SPBcommission

#SPBwip

#SPBtxt

• Important to know to ensure we r on the same page•

> Wanna be friends? Great! I’d love to, if you like Mass Effect, BG3, Helldivers2, Fortnite and other shenanigans and also love to extend the existing lore, hit me up! A space lover that knows what they’re talking about? Hit me upppp.

> I’m 20 and I don’t have and interests being friends with minors so please refrain from messaging me in any other way than professional if it’s for a commission

> I’m strictly and heavily demisexual to the asexual side, if you commission nsfw from me pls don’t be flirty or weird about it. I’m just here to draw what you tell me to not be your prostitute

> If you ever hear my voice avoid commenting about it in any negative way.

> Being pals is great and all but be patient with me and don’t force a reply out of me or I’ll simply just reply when you need smth business related with me, I have issues and those issues cause my social battery to be pretty low and easy to drain so if I see that you struggle to accept my boundaries I will not continue our friendship

[f14fun]

pixelated love (!simmer x mv1) - chapter 7

synopsis: in which the famous three time world champion max verstappen wants to learn how to play the sims 4. except, he doesn't really know how to. so what does he do, search up a youtube tutorial. low-and-behold, y/n's video is the first he watches.

smau ✮ ⋆ ˚｡𖦹 ⋆｡°✩ profile | masterlist ⋆.˚✮🎧✮˚.⋆ prev | next | series index ˚୨୧⋆｡

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yourusername posted on her story

yourusername: GUESS WHO'S SEEING HER SUGAR DADDY 😈🌹❤️😏✈️

story replies:

maxverstappen1: Not funny. 😡

yourusername: your sugar baby awaits u 🤤🤤

yourusername: get ready to have a clean apartment 🤑

maxverstappen1: I could use the extra cooking and cleaning help... as well as help with the cats...

yourusername: gotcha babyboy 💦💦💸😇

maxverstappen1: Currently booking you a flight back HOME ticket...

landonorris: Ayeeee get that bag sis 🤑💸🍑😉

yourusername: LMFAO LANDO GTFO

landonorris: Make sure you get that bag and ur kitty purrs too 😈

yourusername: BYE WHO TF STOLE UR PHONE 😭😭

landonorris: If he can make you laugh and giggle, he can make that ass shake and jigg-

yourusername: lando i'm going to BLAWK u 😭

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yourusername

liked by maxverstappen1, landonorris and 239,761 others

yourusername: i hope pookie wookie bear has been enjoying time with me as i flex on the haters in my super duper uber-cool outfits (pls like it up, i think i spent like hours on pinterest and in my wardrobe coordinating possible outfits 😭😭💸)

view comments:

user1: ZOOWEEMAMA

user2: ALRIGHTTTT an aesthetic kween 🌟🌟

maxverstappen1: I think that your outfits look very super cool! 👍🏻👍🏻

maxverstappen1: I really like your outfits...

maxverstappen1: You look very pretty, schatze ❤️

yourusername: 🥰❤️

user2: GOODNIGHT LMFAO the boyfriend style commenting has me in tears 😭😭😭

user2: alright walk him like a dog sis walk him like a dog 🐶🐶🐶

user3: y'all forget that y/n actually has a bachelors and masters in data science and video game design... she is actually a woman in STEM who is RICHHHH but acts broke when she plays her silly little video games

user4: WAIT FRRR??? mother has BANK?

user5: yeah wait, literally people need to know more but she basically streams on the SIDE.... like she actually works for EA and SIMS 4 FOR REAL

user5: playing the game, testing shit, that is literally part of her job description

user5: y'all have been subject to this SCHEME i've known ab for years, actually!!

user6: BYE HOW LONG HAS SHE FOOLED US LIKE THIS???

user5: welp she's like 25 now... and she graduated with her masters at like age 21... so it's been six years since her job with ea LMFAO

user5: get PUNKED 🫵🏻

user7: bye so she wasn't lying when she said that she has a collection of dior bags... miss ma'am doesn't even NEED max's bag... she has her OWN

yourusername: LOUD. INCORRECT. BUZZER.

yourusername: i actually still do need max's bag as part of my MASTER PLAN for WORLD DOMINATION HAHAHAHA 😈😈😈

maxverstappen1: So I'm basically just a stepping stool.

yourusername: glad that you see your true worth babe 😘😘😘

georgerussell63: Get wrecked 🤣🤣🤣

maxverstappen1: STFU

user8: speaking as someone who literally SAW them roaming the streets of monaco irl... i'm telling you they actually might be a couple fr fr

user8: like he was always holding her bags, her clothes, just basically all of her shit 🤡🤡🤡

user8: and like i literally saw them at a hella expensive private club i know for a FACT that it's hella hard to get into last minute... especially on a week's notice oml 💸😇🌟

user8: bro and yesterday i literally saw them at DIOR and this man wanted to buy her BAGS ON BAGSSSS fr. ofc our rich mother refused but i SWEAR this man secretly bought her one or smth cuz he was eyeing them with sm intent 🤑🤑

user8: AND I DIDN'T INTENTIONALLY STALK THEM, MONACO IS JUST HELLA SMALL APARENTLY CUZ I KEPT SEEING THEM EVERYWHERE 😭😭😭

user9: are we nawt gonna talk ab how last slide miss ma'am is literally parading around with the ACTUAL FUCKING RING ON HER FINGER 💍💍💍

user9: zoom in y'all, i beg pls i swear i'm not hallucinating man

user10: WOAH WHAT THE FUCK???

user9: RIGHT???

user11: wait she is fr wearing that bigass ring around everywhere damn...

user9: ON HER RING FINGER NONTHELESS????

user12: i literally have no fucking idea what is satire and what's real life

user12: this is quite literally the LONGEST someone has still managed to keep me in the dark yet very much still providing me with sm information

user12: i feel bloody PUNKED 🤡😡

user13: wait ur so real LMFAO 😖😖

user13: maybe like the whole wedding bit is fake... but those emerging feels coming from BOTH of them seem VERY MUCH REAL

user14: ^^ such a good point 😉

user15: guys i don't mean to hyperfixiate (that is the last time i'll say that LMAO) but isn't the last slide a bit too close for "just friends" who happened to meet online first and irl just a few days ago?

user15: BYE ik we can't see it but we KNOW SHE IS DEFFO ON TOP OF HIMMMM 🤣🤣

yourusername: i have that top-dominant-alpha energy no matter where i am 😈👹👺🐺🐺🐺

user16: oh!-

maxverstappen1: Spending time with you felt very Spring Breakers Core!!!

user17: BROOOO Y/N HOW HAVE YOU GIRLIPOP-IFIED THIS MAN SO FAR???? 😭😭😭

yourusername: ughhh so true max...

yourusername: just wish we paraded around monaco in a big big pink truck

maxverstappen1: Well... there's always a next time for everything 🤭🤭🤭

user18: WHAT DO Y'ALL KNOW THAT I DON'T

user18: i hate hate HATE being left in the dark y'all 😭

user18: what in the fomo am i experiencing....

user18: this feels like gatekeeping 🧍🏽‍♀️

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taglist: @hiireadstuff @sinofwriting @mehrmonga @the-untamed-soul @glai1023-blog @loloekie @avada-kedavra-bitch-187 @sheastri @llando4norris @gwginnyweasley @carmenita122 @ririyulife @pausmoon @ur-fav-ave @eveninggstar @maddie-naps @erin-odonnell04 @rexit-mo @ems-alexandra @si1ver06 @iamred-iamyellow @bibissparkles @percypie @formula1blog @lanadelray1989 @rylieverstappen-sargent @luvsforme @eiaaasamantha @kaysmiles42 @mvaldez7821 @stinkyjax @sweate-r-weathe-r @laneyspaulding19 @mingyusbigrighttoe

some of these didn't get tagged, and i'm having trouble (?) it's being very weird, idk, so please let me know if your name is here and it didn't tag you ❣️

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author's note: ty guys for reading this fic! 😍🫶🏾

god the last twts made me chuckle a bit... n e ways, lemme know what form of media y'all want to see more of (i.e. twts, insta posts, insta stories, txt messages... i just want to gauge the audience opinion, yk?!)

also since we r getting into the nitty gritty detail of the romance aspect, i was wondering if y'all would want to see some prose/writing... rather than just a smau, b/c it's really hard to illustrate romance without all the creepy-ass paparazzi shots 😭😭

i'm also finally back from vaca! i'm still deciding if i want next chap or chap 9 to be the final chapter, stay tuned!

i'm also still a little behind on the taglist (like a few chapters), so if you didn't get tagged, PLEASE please please write your @ below, i'm so sorry y'all😭

comment if you want to be added to the taglist! ⋆.˚✮🎧✮˚.⋆

[sehodreamsthoughts]

OMG i’m so sorry i am so desensitized at this point.. um yes it’s totally an ed thing i just didn’t think about that omg um.. yeah i’m really sorry just focus on the feeder part 😳😳😳

that’s crazy cuz yes hanbin too🤭🤭 like.. i’m going crazy but i don’t want to be too insane.. soo

matthew makes me so feral in general and yes i agree with u he would love a taller gf (especially a chubby one<333) i see him as either being dom most of the time but with a subby side or kinda subby loser :( definitely a good boy, would spoil u and worship you because he’s obsessed with you but also loves making you flustered (it’s “confirmed” this man has like an oppa or daddy kink…) wants to be in control but also gets turned on if u take that away from him sometimes<333 if ur into it too… lots of thoughts of matthew x jiwoong x reader poly all 3 ways cuz matthew would so sub for jiwoong like help and so would i!!!!!

but um yeah. jiwoong, hanbin, matthew love big girls<333 feeder thoughts with all of them, just want u to be their chubby gf who relies on them for everything<3 i think they’d just be obsessed with how docile n obedient you’d be for them :((( um..

i’m literally so insane but like.. i saw smth too im gonna type this and cross it out because i’m humiliated but….. vina pls tell me u see the vision agree with me i will cry but if u don’t it’s fine tooo i will shut up about it… but…. i’m screaming i really can’t even type it out. basically just.. being too big to touch urself on ur own so he has to help you and you can’t get off by urself anymore bye putting myself in jail. i’m sick 🤧 pls if this is too gross i will leave u alone and never bother u with my nasty thoughts again

- 🥟 anon

Honey, when I say that there are little to almost no things that I find hard to like I'm being real 😭

In my head, that sounds hot too 😭😭😭 (I dated a chubby girl too so I KNOW)

I imagine Hanbin a lot for that scenario 😭👌 (dubcon 🚨)

Coworker!Hanbin eyeing you for a long time because you, his chubby teammate, are always smiling around even when everyone is having a fucking hard time keeping up with the workload.

He respects you a lot because you're smart, kind and are always helping around when nobody else wants, reason why he can't understand why some people don't treat you nice simply because of how you look.

You, realizing it, stop wearing your pretty outfits at work, choosing a more "modest" wardrobe so you don't hear those comments again, shocking him because he never realized how much he liked to see your plump ass and thick legs with them.

Without being able to contain himself, he jerks off to the memory of you wearing a particular skirt that he really likes to see you on. It's simple, black, and you wear them with black stockings too. He's seen that outfit a thousand times, yet he can't stop thinking it's the hottest thing ever just because YOU were the one wearing it.

He starts to get impatient because he NEEDS to see you wearing that skirt again. Looking at your ass when you bend to lift things is not enough, he misses the way your stockings became transparent in the highest part of your thighs, and you look great with those pants, but there's nothing like your skirts.

Hanbin does his best to catch a glimpse of something new that excites him the same way, but don't get fooled, he gets hard with the mere sight of you, it's just that nothing makes him cum like your chubby legs and how they look enormous in skirts.

Not much later, thank God because he's having a harder time containing himself with each day that goes by, the office decides to make a two day one night trip to appease the people that have been complaining at work. He only decides to go after you've said that you'd too, praying deep inside that you go wearing a skirt again. You do, and, thanking the universe, he spends the whole day stuck to your side, helping you with kitchen duty and even acting bold enough to walk with a hand in the small of your back when you two get lost from the group.

At night, when everyone is drunk as fuck and most of them already on their rooms sleeping, you two stay in the open talking about work and drinking. You don't really notice how many shots he's pouring you, or how your drink has more alcohol than what a usual cocktail has. You keep drinking, laughing at the stories Hanbin tells you, and answering his questions. It's all innocent, until there's a particular moment in which you're too fucking drunk to stop yourself from blabbering, and you don't know how the topic changed to it, but you reveal that you haven't been able to cum in a long time because your tummy and your pussy lips are too much of an obstacle for your hand, which can never do much after arriving exhausted to your house because of the busy usual schedule at work.

The words that come out of your mouth make him the hardest he's ever been in weeks, thinking how he'd gladly give you a hand. Without noticing, one of his hands is already caressing your knee, murmuring a "poor girl" with those rosy cheeks and his usual smile nowhere to be found. You, not understanding much of what's happening, or the place you're at, only nod. "I know!", you cry, and open your legs when his hand trails up until it arrives to the border of your skirt.

"I could help you, you know" he offers. "Uhm?" It's the only thing that comes from your mouth, and he doesn't wait for an answer before his wrist is against the pouch of your tummy and his palm against your clothed pussy. "i'll help you" he groans, pressing his hand harder, stealing a surprised whimper from you because of how good it felt.

It doesn't take long until he has you over the table, plastic cups on the grass and some spilled drinks making a mess under you, but that's the least of the things that he could care for when he has your fat pussy in front of him. Your skirt is all up, your stockings are ripped and your panties to the side. With one hand he pushes the amplitude of your tummy, using his thumb and index to maintain your heavy lips open so they don't interrupt his job while his other hand is doing it's best fucking your gummy walls and then circling your puffy clit, taking turns with his attention, making you cry of how good he's touching you.

"Bin- fuck, please, please" you cry. You're delirious, only thinking about the pressure of your abdomen and his slender fingers being perfect for you.

"i'll make you cum baby, don't worry, leave it to me" he says, feeling your juices dripping to his wrist with how messy you are. You had no idea you could get that wet, never having been dripping to that point on your own. Your poor pussy has been so unattended it's practically begging for his cock, and he's dying to give it to you but the way you're breaking from only his fingers is making him dizzy, and with all the alcohol over his head, he doesn't stop until you're coming in front of his eyes, leaking down a heavy stream of your orgasm.

That alone is enough to make him shudder and spurt inside his underwear. He groans, feeling his cum smear against his skin, and kisses you, tasting the alcohol in your system and the salty rest of your tears. He only talks when you've regained some of your consciousness, "wear skirts at work again, and I'll help you every day."

[seiwas]

omg ari.... i have no words....

ari 😭 you wrote me a damn essay i am crying 😭😭😭

my jaw dropped when i saw this in my notifs omg i'm sorry i'm getting to this so late too!!

you are always so thoughtful and kind with giving reviews i am sniffling sawbing what the hek!!! 😭😭 am gonna try to answer to each thing as much as i can!!

pls don't apologise at all for taking long omg i'm thankful that you even considered reading it in the first place 😭 you are so cute!! dshbfsj needing the time to absorb it omg 😭 i completely get you tho, i'm like that too!!

to say my writing makes you emotional bc it's so painfully soft that it hurts omg 😭 that is such a nice thing to say i am so emosdfhbsdf and to say rdg my fics feel like surgery omg PLS 😭 i am so touched that this lil work of mine made you cry 😭 (am sending you a box of tissues for reparations 🤧)

ive always found my writing style to be relatively plain and simple so am so happy to hear that you like it 🥺 esp since i find yours so distinct and rich!! it means so much coming from you 🥺 being able to make people feel things is such a compliment for me bc what is art!! if not to make others feel smth right!!!! 🥺

i am so glad!! you saw through my intro line and am happy that you think it set the tone for the fic 🥺 i feel like i always try to start fics that way now—with one line that introduces an element of the fic, whether it's tone, or mood, or motif, theme, etc. in this case, it was the theme (and unintentionally, the tone too!) it's exactly that too!!!! a contrast to his greedy nature jhbfs you get it!!

i am always so touched when people comment on my characterisations bc i do feel like i spend the most time on it 😭 writing this piece was honestly torture lmao 😭😭 getting into gojo's headspace was tough and i was having such a hard time that churning this out literally felt like i was writing in the dark 😭 so to hear you say this!! that i wrote him thoughtully and that he feels real and human 🥺 it makes everything feel so worth it.

as my first long gojo fic, writing gojo shy and boyish was such a joy for me too 🥺 bringing out a side of him that i didn't think a lot of people wrote at the time. i think a bit of my own personal affections came through too 🥺 (that ice cream scene was one i went over time and time again, but i'm happy with how it turned out in the end!!)

and omg him being desperate and afraid—i'm so flattered you found in chilling. i thought about the concept of gojo being openly afraid for a while because i didn't know if it was ooc for him to be that way. but ultimately, i did realise that that's exactly why it's so heartbreaking—because he isn't like that normally. yet, with this, he's brought down to his knees, in pain, almost pleading. it hurts to think about and it hurt writing it. and i think the journey there is complicated and tiring and frustrating, esp on the end of whoever's dealing with gojo (col reader), because, he really is so hard to read!!! it is so satisfying for me that you picked up on all of these things (ofc you did, it's you ari 😭).

that office scene was especially hard to write because i felt the tension crushing my heart shdbsajhd having him kneel was a conscious choice bec i wanted it to be a moment of surrender, and like you mentioned, helpless!!

and here you are!! flattering me again!! omg 😭 telling me that i'm good at bringing out a character's humanity??? omg 😭 i could cry!!! the little details about them?? omg 😭 i don't want to get all sappy here but ultimately i think it's because i think that's how love is!! knowing someone so intimately, good and bad and still accepting them for it. the little quirks & habits that make them them, the ugly parts they don't want others to see 🥺 yeah... i have lots of feelings abt this 😭

and omg the divinity theme yes!!! our brain cells connecting IS SO TRUE PLS

AND OMG. the tethered to satoru in pursuit of gojo—i feel like you might be one of the first to point out that line!! you got it 100% omg 😭 it's really losing himself in pursuit of something else, 'greater', and in the process losing col reader too 🥺

hsdjgdjf i'm so happy that you also noticed that he does love reader and fears for how he affects her too 🥺 i think it's so easy to get lost in the idea that gojo doesn't care as much as reader does, and is entirely too focused on himself to worry about how reader feels... but i do think!!! that given their history and what their relationship has gone through, there's just no way he could disregard her feelings like that. there has to be a reason why he's distancing himself, and it's in consideration of her too.

i've read this fic so many times, going over it, editing, rereading to see if i still like it as much months later, that all those lines you mentioned stay burned in my mind omg 😭 they're all lines i hold near and dear to me too.

to hear that you resonated with col!gojo a lot omg especially w that line 😭 that line actually inspired the whole concept of the fic!! dbsdfb

you are also (once again, im not surprised) right!!!! the frustration of not knowing how to do this one thing when he can do anything else right. i liked playing with that idea bc of the contrast it provides to his character!! how this one thing that should come so naturally, doesn't to him.

and col reader omg.... when i tell you ari.... the way col reader has grown on me too. some people might think this is a self-shippy thing, that i write col reader patterned after me, but that isn't the case at all 😭 i wouldn't put up with half the stuff col reader's put with 😭 like she's a trooper fr!!! such a sweetheart!!! an ideal partner i envision for someone like col gojo 😭

i am so happy you see her resilience, you don't even know. a lot of the readers that i've read with gojo have been either feisty ones that match him, or ones absolutely lovestruck with him. i kind of wanted to see what it would be like with a reader who's gentler, a bit quieter, letting him speak when he's ready, and patient most of all. because of that, i was really scared that col reader would feel a bit passive, even though i really intended for her to have this steady resilience to her. someone can be strong and kind, yes!! that's what i wanted her to embody 🥺 and that observation of yours!! gojo being the physically stronger one but depending on reader for the emotional side of things!! that's so true 🥺 i didn't really think of it that way initially, but now completely see it too!!!

the col couple is so very dear to me because they really are so gentle with each other 🥺 i'm so happy you love them too 🥺 (i also giggled at 'this gutted me like a sad fish. ur ability to turn my heart into sashimi w only a couple of finely chosen words kills me every time' that is so vivid but ofc i can trust u to come up with smth like that 😭😭😭)

seeing you go through the feels for col reader is SO lovely 😭 she truly deserves everything for all the shit she put up with 😭 how she gives him an out always because she understands that it's scary and it's hard and she loves him that's why she's so considerate of him 😭 the love in her heart too!! AAAH there's a line in... i think 2 fics from this one, 'look my way, you're what i crave', that kind of affirms the kind of reader col reader is and i 🥺🥺🥺 all the time

(and omg!! i have that fic in my tbr rn 😌 i am SO excited to read it, i LOVE concepts like that sdfhbs the ambiguity!! the need for nothing labelled!! nothing more!! as long as the feelings are there and mutual 🥺 yeah 🥺 i also get so happy when our views overlap!!! bc then i think 'omg i can run to ari w this and they'd get me 200% shdfsdh it's like you said!! our braincells connecting!!!)

omg ari... i swear... 😖 i do think gojo cries abt it 😭 tears up 😭 gets emotional 😭 the whole thing 😭 & that trope/dynamic is also so dear to me!!! the patience is very healing to me too 🥺

and yes omg reader's struggles with it too. sometimes i feel like i don't portray it enough but reader definitely had such a hard time with gojo 😭 i don't mention it i think (maybe in future works), but reader truly... had to build her way to that level of understanding. she didn't just come out knowing how to deal w gojo 😭 i think it came with a lot of time, shared experiences, and a deep knowing of him that got her to this point (smth i hope to explore in col 0 and fics set between col 0 to 'do you believe in love?')

AND AAAAAH their lil cute scenes were my my ways of soothing myself while writing this omg 😭 u r so real for being jealous of both of them 😭 i'm glad you can see their history and comfortability with one another!! flustery gojo is the cutest i agree 🥺 to reduce such a self-assured man to a blushing mess!!! i swear!! it does smth!!! and all the subtle intimacies between them!!!!!

and omg the final point you discussed, how gojo has such a big heart! yes!! omg i think gojo's a complex character because he's always somewhere in the middle of two things. in this case, while i do think gojo has a big heart that cares for others and looks out for them, i don't think he's selfless either. i actually think he can be pretty selfish, whether for personal motives, or for the sake of other things that will contribute to a goal he wants tor each in the end. it's smth i think abt a lot, but gojo isn't necessarily a goody goody guy but he cares about the people who matter to him.

and your tags!! omg these are all so sweet pls don't feel bad at all 😭 it's not a mess!! you relayed your thoughts so perfectly!! and even if it were a mess, i wouldn't love it any less!!!

i appreciate you so much for taking the time to read this, to sort through your favourite bits and write such a long and lovely essay on it oh my goodness 😭 you didn't have to do this at all ari!! you are so sweet!!

i always feel such an outpour of love from you in every interaction we have and i am so grateful for it 🥺 i appreciate you so so much and i know i can always count on you when it comes to our guy 🥺 you just get him. ily ari, truly, we are writing novels for eachother atp HAHAHAHAHAHA

₊˚⊹｡ tell me about love (show me how) | gojo satoru

wc: 7.4k

summary: you teach gojo how to love. 

contains: f!reader in mind but no pronouns mentioned, descriptions of blood (typical jjk canon type stuff), shibuya onwards manga spoilers, implied minor character death, there are swears, suggestive bit at the end (but it’s funny!), lots of internal thoughts/dialogues, kind of canon divergent

a/n: relates to my short blurb, do you believe in love?, explores a lot on how i think gojo would be when it comes to love; ambiguous but linear timeline (jumps through scenes)

collection masterlist: conversations on love 01. do you believe in love? <- you are here -> 2.5. and my body keeps saying (it's yours)

When Gojo has love for the taking, he makes no move to reach for it. 

It’s unusual for him to be so restrained, being born into greed and predetermined purpose—a one-man clan fated to hold power close to God. There exists a hunger within him, insatiable and stubborn, unstoppable until he gets what he wants. It’s all he’s ever known: to take and devour, simply because he can. 

Yet with this, he doesn’t. He can’t seem to. 

“I think I’ll always want to be with you, Satoru.” 

When you offer your heart to Gojo, he looks at you softly. 

You catch his eyes and see the sky, bright, with flecks of light floating on his irises like cotton clouds in its periphery. It’s different from the piercing blue you’re used to—a terrifying riptide that washes you away. 

It wasn’t intended as a confession, but Gojo always takes whatever you have to say. He commits it to memory each time; how could he not? Words that come from you flow so naturally, so earnestly that the air around you shifts all on its own.

His lips part slightly, red spatterings lining pink inner corners before they close again. He doesn’t say anything, but you know Gojo and the fingerprints of his soul—the way he bites his lips to withhold himself from speaking. 

It’s dangerous, he thinks, how you make wanting something so complicated seem so simple.

He takes a small breath, then you feel it, pressed against you—the faint signature of his cursed energy overlaying his entirety. It tickles your skin a little, the effects of it brushing. You don’t remember the last time he put it up around you.

A million things run through Gojo’s mind for every split second he breathes, but at this point in time, he counts a million and one—one thought that if he touches you by infinity instead of his hands, he can have this good thing for now, that this is the only way how. 

You’d think this a rejection, if any, but he doesn’t move away from you, and the blush blooming at the tips of his ears says more than he ever could. 

.

.

.

The subtle intimacy you share with Gojo grows sporadically, from knuckles brushing to pinkies touching. He stands next to you more often, a few inches closer than he used to and sometimes, still, with an infinity connecting you.

.

.

.

When you hold Gojo’s hand for the first time, he jolts very slightly, as if you’ve shocked him. He’s started to put his infinity down around you again, and you continue the limbo of whatever it is you both are—except this time, he’s made it clearer, just a little bit. 

During the last few leaves of fall, Gojo skips to an ice cream stand like a pre-schooler on early dismissal. You trail behind him slowly, shaking your head affectionately; he’s the only adult you know that still acts like he’s 5. 

“You’re like a horse.” you jest, stopping next to him in line.

“You’re a snail.” he huffs, side-eyeing you, like a child.

You gasp exaggeratingly, hitting his arm. He fake-winces, but that’s all it is; Gojo’s the strongest and you don’t know of any human touch that has managed to hurt him, except—

Yeah. Your eyes trail to the side of his neck, hidden in the shadows of his jawline; there’s really nothing, but sometimes you blink and see crimson, oozing, gushing, leaking—you shake away the thought.  

When he receives his ice cream cone stacked with vanilla-strawberry-vanilla and rainbow sprinkles on top, the smile on his face parallels the sun. He looks cozy, almost boyish, beaming against the autumn breeze blowing on his thick gray hoodie. 

You wonder if he feels just as warm.

(Maybe that’s why you do it, then).

Once Gojo turns to give you the cone, you reach for his other hand tentatively, shyly—your fingertips grazing his palm lightly. You want to give him an out if he can’t take this, but he doesn’t move. He twitches a little, as if he’s been caught off guard, but that’s it. 

His eyes widen briefly, just a bit, before turning into the same soft skies frequenting them lately. 

“Sorry, is this okay?” you whisper, peering up at him. 

He stares at you for a while, his hand in yours unmoving. You leave a sliver of space between your palms–your own version of his infinity–just in case. And he takes it all in: how tiny your hand is wrapped around his, how gently you speak—how warm he feels now amidst this autumn breeze. 

“The strawberry’s really good,” he finally replies, pressing the dessert closer to you, “try it.” 

You give him one last look before you indulge in his request. Gojo’s always been good at that: pushing and pulling—pushing you away with non-answers only to pull you back in with something else. 

But he doesn’t let go of your hand, so you keep yours there, palms nearly touching. (You make a point not to mention how the parts that do touch become clammy for the rest of the afternoon). 

.

.

.

You start to think that your relationship with Gojo is going somewhere, then he disappears (‘gets sealed’ might be the more proper term). 

His absence is deafening. You’ve all lost so much, and it hurts, but you carry on knowing full well that this is what being a jujutsu sorcerer means. There aren’t many left to fight his fight, so you do what you can to. You stay with Shoko, mostly, if not going back and forth with Utahime. You can’t afford to be crying when the students, the kids—you can’t even bear to think about what they’re going through.

Nights are the hardest, when the world is quiet but your mind is loud, throwing far too many questions you can’t find the answers to.

What will Gojo come back to? Then the scarier thought: Will he even come back? 

You don’t want to doubt him, ever, but your mind continues to play back that day, like a final memory. The unintentional confession; his eyes like the sky. 

You don’t want it to be the last important thing you tell him. 

“I should start looking into retirement plans, like Nanamin.” you raise an eyebrow, questioning. Gojo’s never spoken this far into the future before, most especially his. 

“Work is shit now for you too?” you scoff, leaning back on the wooden ledge. 

Gojo rolls his eyes, skipping the coverage of his blindfold today. 

“Well, after I remove the old geezers and change everything, there won’t be much left to do.” 

You hum in response. He does make a point. 

“Also, Megumi won’t need me anymore,” he pouts, whining, “who else will want me around?” 

You try to hold back your laugh, wanting so badly to tell him that Megumi doesn’t even really like him around to begin with—but you figure breaking Gojo’s heart isn’t really something you want to do if you value your peace. 

“I don’t know,” you reply, shifting your weight, “I think I’ll always want to be with you, Satoru.” 

Even now, especially now. You wish you were with him, too. 

.

.

.

The day you hear of Gojo’s potential return, you drop your breakfast outside the 7-Eleven near Jujutsu Tech. You’re supposed to meet up with Utahime for a weekly check-in but your feet take you to Shoko, and the footsteps in your heart have never echoed louder. 

This is the first good news in a while—especially after finding out about the state of Megumi and what happened to Tsumiki, your sweet girl Tsumiki. 

When Gojo comes back, it’s like he never left. He pops out of the box joking the same way, talking the same way. He proves himself to be the strongest all the same, and when he wins—there are scars, but he wins and that fact stays the same. 

So, when you reach for his hand now and he moves away, you’re stuck wondering what’s changed. 

.

.

.

You let it stay that way for a while, your understanding extending to Gojo the way it always has—you don’t push, and he gives you what he can. It honestly isn’t all that bad, because at least he’s still talking to you like he used to. 

Jujutsu society is still shaken from its core. You and all who have survived bear the task of building everything from the ground up; it’s exhausting, especially since most of you are still mourning. 

Megumi’s been put in an induced coma; you understand why but it still tugs at your heart when Shoko tells you it might take a while. Everyone else has been assigned to sweep through the rest of Japan to ensure that any remaining curses are taken care of. 

You see Yuuji and Yuuta visit Megumi sometimes, along with Maki and Toge when they’re free. Gojo’s there pretty often too, using healing sessions with Shoko as an excuse to see the boy he’s practically raised at 17, with you. 

But while Gojo’s smiles to everyone else remain as charming as ever, you can always tell when they’re untrue. 

.

“Are you okay?” 

You find Gojo a little after midnight on the rooftop of the faculty building. The city always looks pretty from up here—a sea of lights reflected up on the sky. It’s a running joke that rooftops are Gojo’s ‘thing’, but you know he really only comes to places like this to think. You wonder what’s on his mind now, coming here every single night since being unsealed. 

Despite how quiet you try to be, sneaking up on Gojo is almost impossible; he senses you before he hears you, sees the familiar traces of your cursed energy through his Six Eyes. 

“Can’t sleep thinking about me?” he teases, looking straight ahead.

The steps you take towards him are careful, afraid of running him off like you seem to be lately. You sit beside him, leaving a space larger than you usually do, then shrug, “These days, yeah.”

It’s times like this when Gojo forgets how honest you can be, how he takes your word for everything, completely. 

It’s threatening, he thinks, how you can say so much with so little. 

“Well, maybe I can suggest—” 

“Seriously, Satoru,” you grip the ledge tightly, knuckles turning white, “please.” 

You tend to let Gojo dodge your questions a lot of the time, his elusiveness a hallmark of who he is. So you never sound like you do now, serious, pleading. 

Gojo fiddles with his fingers, pondering. He hums lowly before speaking, “Does it matter?” 

It hurts you a little, how that’s even a question. He should know better than to ask that to you. 

“It matters to me, Satoru,” you sigh, “you know it does.”

You barely catch the way his brows furrow at your response, but there are creases on his blindfold that can’t be created by anything else. And Gojo knows—is so painfully aware of the way you care. 

Since coming back, he’s never felt like he’s fully returned. It’s an odd existence of in-between, like he breathes everything and nothing all at the same time. The emotions are even worse, overloading his senses with feelings he can never pinpoint. 

How does he tell you that he must be fucked in the head? That every second in his mind is another step closer to insanity? That he’s lost your tether on Satoru in pursuit of Gojo—of being a god? 

“I’ll tell you,” he starts, “but you have to look away.”

You’ve always treated Gojo tenderly, patiently, and he knows, without a doubt, that no matter what he says you will continue to do the same. But he can’t allow that, not anymore. Not after the way you looked at him that day.

“Okay,” you mutter, turning your head the other way. 

He breathes out and you can almost picture it: half-bitten lips and eyes like low tide. 

“I’m fine,” he says to the back of your head, “you have nothing to worry about.” 

A breeze picks up and brushes past your neck. It’s a lie. He knows it, knows you know it too, but—

it’s easier this way, he thinks, to give you answers when you’re not looking.

Gojo’s never found a weakness he can’t work around, but he might have just found one with you—in your eyes, that read through his every lie. If you turn around now, he’ll want to tell you everything.

“Satoru,” you whisper, letting his name fill the air. You get it—him, and even when you don’t, you try damn hard to because you refuse to let Gojo carry all of it on his own. 

There are crescent indents on your palm from squeezing your knuckles too hard. You think, is this how you form shallow cuts on your heart?

“It’s just me,” you continue, facing him when you say it. 

He takes you all in—your eyes that hold the city lights, your lips, the only vessel that handles his name so delicately. It’s that look on your face again and Gojo’s hit with an ache in his chest—the overwhelming truth that whatever it is, he feels the same. 

.

.

.

There’s a secret Gojo keeps, one he’s certain he’ll never tell you: that when he looks at you upon his return and finds an emotion he refuses to name, he’s never felt so afraid.  

He takes in the shadows under your eyes and the sunkenness of your cheeks—the number of blinks it takes you to reign in tears on the brink of leaking. The way your voice shakes when you say his name.

Shoko tells him about it because she knows you never will—about how you’ve been running yourself dry, speeding through colonies to gather intel for any possible way to break the seal. She tells him about the sleepless nights, how she catches you standing outside his office at 3 a.m. before travelling to Utahime the next morning. 

And he cannot comprehend it at first, cannot understand how he’s caused you to crumble this way. 

If this is all because of him, how you’ve broken yourself all for his sake, he can’t allow it. To see you ruin yourself over him, over anyone ever—you deserve better.

So, when Gojo has love for the taking, he makes no move to reach for it; he cannot possibly take any more from you if this is what is left of you when he does. 

.

.

.

“You’ve been avoiding me,” you catch him by the door of the conference room. 

Rebuilding an entire society requires work and apparently a lot of meetings. Gojo doesn’t usually go to most of them, leaving you and Utahime to carry the chunk of his attendance when he’s not there. In the rare times that he does show up, he makes it a point to be the last one in and the first one out. Utahime hates him for it but you don’t blame him—he isn’t exactly amicable with other figures of authority.

He pauses when he steps out of the door, hands in pockets as he turns to face you. 

You’re not mad or anything, just stating the fact. He’s always known you to speak this way. You lean against the wall next to you, keeping your arms crossed. More people continue to file out of the conference room, some eyeing the two of you curiously as they pass by.

Gojo glances at them, suddenly self-conscious as he clears his throat, “Right, I’ve been avoiding the paperwork you left in my office,” he emphasizes, practically announcing it to everyone in the vicinity, “let’s finish it now.” 

You don’t know whether it’s irritating that Gojo’s so terribly bad at acting, or comforting that he still can’t, for the life of him, successfully lie in front of you. 

He motions for you to follow him as he strolls down the hallway, but you intentionally lag a few steps behind, careful not to encroach on his space lest it make him avoid you any more than he already is.

Stepping into Gojo’s office after so long feels weird, like you belong here but only to a memory of it—as if closing the door behind you feels like activating a muscle you haven’t for a while. It’s been months after all. 

Your eyes skim over the entire room, zeroing in on the stacks of paper lined up on his desk; paperwork has always been Gojo’s least favorite part of the job, often leaving you to do them with him (or alone, when you’re feeling generous). Not much has changed in his space; the mini living area still exists to the left of the room, with little bits of you in its interiors—the pillows, the coffee table books. 

Gojo plops down on the sofa chair and props his feet up on the ottoman, giving four scrolls to his phone before pocketing it. He has the audacity to casually offer you the seat across from him, as if nothing’s wrong—as if he hasn’t been avoiding you for god’s sake. 

Ever since the rooftop, he’s canceled lunch with you six times for reasons that you’re now realizing are less likely to be true. He’s kept a distance of at least one person in between you at all times, and to this day, you still don’t understand why. 

You sigh, taking a seat and leaning back to cross your legs. 

“You’re so bad at acting.” you start.

Being with Gojo for so long, you’ve come to realize that there’s no point being angry with him when your heart can never take it. 

“I technically wasn’t lying.” he replies, sticking his index finger up. 

“Yeah, I can see that,” you snicker, nodding to his desk. 

It’s always like this with Gojo: he pulls you in and you follow. No matter the distance between you, when you sit down together like this, it still always flows so easily. The banter you’ve built together over a decade and more shines through no matter what state your relationship is in. 

Neither of you say anything until Gojo replaces his blindfold for his sunglasses, placing the piece of cloth on the coffee table. 

You break the silence. 

“Why have you been avoiding me?” you ask quietly. Gojo aches at that, how you still choose to regard him so kindly. 

Why has he been avoiding you? It’s a good question, completely valid with how he’s been treating you lately, but he could draw up every answer he has, all one million and one, and still not know what to say.

Gojo’s a pretty bad communicator; for how much he talks, he doesn’t really say much—and maybe that’s the root of all this. There are too many things he wants to say but can’t formulate in the right way. 

“If it’s something I did, can you at least let me know?” you continue. Gojo frowns, how can you be wronged yet still think of yourself as the one to blame? 

“Why do you do that?” he tuts, head tilting sideways as his hands dig deeper into his pockets. 

“Do what?” you furrow your brows, confused. 

“You didn’t do anything wrong, so don’t worry about it.” he says dismissively. 

You arch an eyebrow; he has it all mistaken. 

“Satoru, I’m not worried because I feel guilty,” you sit up, inching towards the edge of your seat, “I’m worried because you’re pushing me away.” your voice is level, but your pupils shake.

Something grips at his chest seeing you this way; together or apart, he seems to be the main contributor to your heartache. 

You wonder if confronting him like this is any good if he’s not going to say anything anyway. 

“If you want space, that’s okay, I get it, but,” you exhale, “at least just tell me why.” 

This entire time avoiding you, Gojo’s had you on his mind—the million and one. He’s come to terms with what he feels when you’re together, and how it amplifies when you’re not. 

It’s shitty of him to practically ghost you, not just in text but in real life too. But he’s thought about it logically, really, that removing himself from your life should be just like ripping off a bandaid—painful but quick. At least that way, you’d get over it fast. 

He’d been resigned to doing that and that was the plan—until now. 

All it takes is seeing that look in your eyes, and his resolve falls apart. 

“I can’t.” he speaks softly. 

What hurts the most is that beneath his sunglasses, his eyes still hold the sky. 

You think you want to cry. 

You take this as your answer and close your eyes, taking a deep breath before getting up to leave. If this is goodbye, you don’t want your last interaction to be an awkward memory of him watching you bawl in his office chair. 

You push yourself up with the armrest only to sit back down—because Gojo is right in front of you, blocking your way. His infinity is up but touching, a tingling sensation sweeping across your knees. 

“Wait,” he swallows, a franticness you’ve never seen before. His head stays down as he bites his lips, sunglasses hanging by his fingertips. You wonder what he wants to say, that even if it comes out messy, it’s okay. You want to tell him that it’s just you—that you’ll always want to hear it all anyway. 

What comes next is unlike any version of Satoru you have ever known—nervous and uncertain, almost like he’s afraid. He lowers himself, slowly coming down to his knees in front of you. A giant of a man so small in your presence. 

“I don’t know how.” he mutters, dropping his sunglasses to the floor. 

You blink once, twice, still surprised by what’s in front of you. Gojo has always towered above you, has always known how to do anything and everything so effortlessly without fail. 

Watching him now, with every inhale and exhale dragging in slow motion, you do your best not to startle him. 

“How to what?” you whisper, the moment so fragile. 

He looks up, eyes locking with yours. A reaction happens in that moment—the split second of all his thoughts collapsing into one. You see a clear sky, blue and bright as day, the Satoru he saves for you—while he sees you, with that look on your face, the one that he knows has always only meant love. 

The sincerity in your gaze overwhelms him—makes him look away before it becomes too much. Red blooms at the tips of his ears as he bites the inner corners of his lips, fingers grabbing at the fabric of his pants. You’re afraid he might run away again, but he doesn’t and stays right where you are. 

“You know…” he looks to the side, pouting, “whatever you do….”

“Like…?” you coax lightly, trying hard to hide the small smile forming on your lips. 

You wonder how many versions of Satoru you’ll meet in your lifetime, and if this one, shy and nervous, will be one you’ll fit into the crevices of your heart just like all the others. 

He grips his pants tighter, fabric bunching under his fingers, “When you hold my hand… those things. You get it.” 

And you do (get it), so you don’t push, taking whatever Gojo has to give you like you always have. 

The tension relieves from you slowly, comforted by the fact that at least he’s given you his reasons now (no matter how vague they still seem to be). That at least there are no non-answers this time. 

You tell yourself that it’s okay, that you’re content as long as Gojo’s in your life even without the possibility of becoming something more. 

“Ok—”

But there’s always one thing you forget about Gojo—

“So show me how.”

—in the moments you least expect it, he speaks the words that matter most. 

.

.

.

You choose to show him slowly, gently, like the trickling introduction of water to a man who is first learning how to drink. 

In the first few weeks of you and Gojo readjusting to one another, he turns on his infinity again—but only when he gets close enough to touch you. Lunches together happen more often, dinners sometimes too. Then he puts his infinity down, indefinitely. 

For the most part, your relationship falls into the usual steps of your dynamic with Gojo; there’s no pressure for anything and he likes that, appreciates the time you’re giving him to learn things at his own pace. 

It grows organically that way: knuckles brushing as you both reach for the stapler, pinkies touching whenever you walk side-by-side during site visits—until you’re able to hold his hand fully again, leaving that little infinity between your palms for him to close (hopefully, one day). 

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.

.

The faculty room is cold, especially during winter. The heating system is never warm enough to keep your hands from shaking whenever you mix your morning coffee. 

“So loud so early,” Gojo saunters into the kitchen, hands in pockets as he approaches the pantry. 

You stop mixing, ceasing the clinking of the spoon against your mug. “How are you not freezing?” 

He shrugs, grabbing his box of (heavily sugared) cereal. “I guess I’m just hot.” he says, turning to wiggle his eyebrows.

You roll your eyes and set your coffee on the table, Gojo following with a bowl brimming with cereal and milk. 

Mornings usually consist of you and Gojo, with an occasional new hire who has an early class that day. Most of the time, it’s just you two though, with Shoko coming in much closer to lunch time already. 

“Want some?” he asks, holding out his spoon.

It’s routine—Gojo asks and you decline, choosing to save yourself from the cavities that he somehow manages to evade despite having a diet of 80% sugar. 

Today though, you’re feeling a little adventurous. 

You nod, opening your mouth. Gojo’s eyes widen, nearly dropping the spoon at your request. You see the flush of his cheeks and smile, corners of your mouth extending wider. The spoon is shoved to your mouth too quickly, almost like he’s embarrassed to feed you. 

“Too sweet,” you scrunch your face, swallowing down the copious amount of sugar you’ll feel for days. 

If there’s one thing you’ve learned about Gojo throughout this whole relationship trial period, he recovers from any state within a nanosecond. There’s no end to how shameless he can be. 

“Like me, right?” he winks.

“Sure,” you drawl sarcastically and Gojo smiles like it’s high praise. 

You sip your coffee slowly, revelling in the heat that flows down your throat.

“Can I have half of that?” you point to his bowl. Gojo looks at you, confused, but slides it over anyway.

What happens next is an abomination to Gojo’s eyes—pure absolute disgust: you pour half of his cereal into your coffee and mix, sipping and crunching on a few pieces every now and then. 

His face contorts into complete distaste, horror and revulsion in the way his mouth hangs open. 

“What are you doing? That’s gross!” he nearly yells, reaching over to bring your mug down. His hand covers yours for a moment, the contact still causing gallops in his heartbeat. 

You laugh, giggling as he processes what you’d wasted his cereal on. It honestly doesn’t taste that bad, you think. 

“You’re weird,” he says to you, the grin on his face uncontained. This morning, he feels fond, like the butterflies in his stomach are warm, tickling him from the inside. “Give me.” he motions to your mug. 

You hold it up for him to take a sip but he keeps his hand over yours when he tastes, sticking his tongue out once the bitterness of your coffee hits. You set the mug down, preparing to reach for your spoon, but he takes your hand in his, long fingers slotting right between yours, interlacing. 

Gojo doesn’t normally reach for your hand, much less interlace them together (a recent evolution to your hand-holding), but this feels nice, how your fingers fit right in the spaces of his. 

You turn to him, a shy smile on your face. The tips of his ears are blush red but he looks at you the same, “Your hands were cold,” he pouts, “is this– is this okay?” 

“Yeah, it’s warm. Thank you, Satoru.” you nod, beaming. And it’s not a competition but he hopes you see the light in his eyes, how it feels to be ignited within him only when he’s spending breakfasts like this with you. 

.

.

.

Shoko asks what you are and you don’t know what to tell her other than you’re happy and it’s good. Gojo’s existence is loud and vibrant, easy to spot from miles away—but he cares for you discreetly, in the hand that gently rests on your lower back while crossing the street, and the seemingly unlimited supply of your favorite coffee when you have no recollection of restocking it ever. 

He gives you a new mug for Christmas, one with little cereals painted all over while you give him his own tube of hand cream that he claims always smells like you. 

During the faculty New Year celebration, you overhear one of the new hires make a move on Gojo. You aren’t bothered by it or anything, simply walking past to sip your sake by the couch. You can hear them talk a bit from the kitchen, but you try not to pry despite how curious you are about his response. 

Until—

“I’m taken,” you hear Gojo say bluntly. 

Everything rings in your ears after that. The countdown music is loud, but your heart beats louder; there are murmurs and footsteps around you, but only one man crouches down to check on you, glass of water in hand. 

You snap out of it and see blue, the sky—a familiar light; you don’t think you can control the smile on your face, the alcohol lowering your inhibitions to paint on something lovesick. 

And when he smiles back, pink lips stretching wide—oh your heart can’t take it. He places one hand on your knee, rubbing gently. You hear it faintly, how he asks if you’re okay, but all you can do is nod, words failing to express how you feel right now.  

The countdown starts. 3 — and you take his face in your hands, squishing his cheeks to an image of him on your phone from many, many years ago. 2 — you go closer and his eyes go wide, a mixture of panic and surprise, but soft at the same time. 1 — you lean in and his eyelids fall shut, his chest on rampage. Then it lands, there, on the tip of his nose: a delicate peck and the smell of sake mixed with mint (like the lip balm you always carry around in your pocket). 

When you pull away from him, you’re smiling the biggest he’s ever seen, and he can’t feel it from how numb his cheeks have become, but he’s doing the same. 

.

.

.

That kiss to his nose serves as the catalyst to the months that follow: Gojo becomes more comfortable touching you now, and though he blushes every single time, there’s nothing to be ashamed of because you do too. Shoko can’t believe the slow burn this is taking you both, having watched this on the sides since you were both 22, but you think you like it—like the slow drizzle of honey on Gojo’s favorite breakfast waffles. 

“How is it?” you ask, watching as Gojo takes a big bite. 

“D Beft.” he replies, mouth full as he chews. You take the seat beside him and take a spoonful. 

“There’s a secret ingredient.” you say mischievously, wiggling your eyebrows. 

He swallows before he scoffs, “What?” cutting up another piece, “Love?” 

You’re surprised because he says it so casually, and Gojo’s never talked about love, has never even mentioned the word since this shift in your relationship. He realizes a beat late by the expression on your face and gets flustered, thinking immediately of ways to brush past it. 

You had meant to say that you used that infused sugar he buys whenever he goes to Kyoto, but… you suppose love works too. He should know by now, right? 

“If it is?” you whisper, pretending to stir your coffee. 

Gojo doesn’t know how to approach this, really, but he’s come too far to back out now. He clears his throat, mentally running through what he wants to say, then, “Good. ‘Cause that’s what I put in your coffee too.” 

You laugh and the tension dissipates; there are hearts in your eyes for how hard Gojo has tried after denying himself of this for so long. 

He stares at you—at the laugh lines by your eyes and the soft curves of your lips, the moment moving much too slow, stop motion in his mind. He’s drawn in until you’re all too close, a few centimeters from your noses touching. 

Your laughter dies and your cheeks feel like they’re on fire; he’s so close you think he might kiss you. The signs are there—his eyes scaling your face to focus on your lips, his tongue peeping ever so slightly to wet his lips. 

So you wait. 

But he doesn’t, because he moves away after wiping his thumb on the side of your mouth. Even though you know there was nothing there. 

Gojo continues to eat, blabbering about a site visit he’s assigned to next week, but you don’t miss the way his ears are fully red and how he’s biting his lips to death.

.

The tension this time is different; instead of a growing rift, you can’t seem to be close enough. Every time you part ways, he lets go of your hand more reluctantly—as if he wants to say more, do more, but stops himself while he still can. 

When he leaves for missions, you kiss his cheek, pull him in by the hand and linger there, shyly. He gets embarrassingly red but tries to cover it up by telling you not to miss him too much (even though you know you will, and he knows he’ll miss you more). 

Your near-kisses with Gojo happen more frequently, and it comes to a point where he even manages to land one on your forehead, while you fall asleep next to him on his office couch. 

It’s driving you crazy, this tension—the mixed signals of it all. You try to kiss him a few times on the lips, but he evades them each time. You’ve caught Gojo staring at your lips more times than you can count; if that isn’t a sign, you don’t know what is. 

Now that Gojo thinks about it, he’s come so far yet the prospect of kissing you properly still scares him. What if he fucks up? Doesn’t do it right? What if it’s not how he wants you to be kissed? 

There’s that secret Gojo will never tell you, of how seeing that look on you has never gotten him more afraid. And he’s worked through that now, but it’s evolved into something else: how Gojo is now afraid of love, more than anything else, not because of loss but because he might not know how. 

And kissing you, loving you this way—he’s never done it before, doesn’t know how to make you feel love without his lips shaking and heart palpitating; how to do it while letting you know he feels the same. 

.

It happens during an assignment out of town. Curses aren’t as bad as they used to be, but they’re still stronger than what any of the available sorcerers right now can handle. 

You don’t remember the last time you saw Gojo use his technique that way—almost forgotten how powerful and ruthless he can be. Every time since, holding your hand, keeping you close—he’s just been your Satoru. 

Your apartment for the weekend is a two-bedroom unit with one bathroom and a decently sized living area and kitchenette; Gojo always chooses the room in front of the bathroom because he tends to wake up in the middle of the night to pee (information you know from your many other assignments with him before). Still, going as what you are now—it feels different. 

There’s a charged air between you as you move around the unit; you make your nightly tea while Gojo looks through the groceries for some crackers. It’s peaceful and quiet—domestic almost, but there are goosebumps on your skin for reasons you can’t explain. Being around Gojo lately has felt that way.

He brushes past you to throw the finished packet of crackers and the feeling intensifies; it’s not awkward, just tense, like anticipation sitting deep in your bellies, waiting on each other to make the first move. 

He announces that he’ll use the bathroom first, if you don’t mind, and you motion for him to go ahead. Your mind is fuzzy and having Gojo around seems to only make it worse.

When you walk past the bathroom and straight to your room, you hear Gojo humming that soft pop tune from a popular girl group on the radio earlier. You giggle, thinking it’s sweet—how he sings obnoxiously around everyone else but is admittedly pretty good when it’s just him, alone. 

You still have the rest of the weekend in this area, having agreed to monitor the site and any nearby locations for other suspicious activity, but at least the worst of it is over (maybe just to you though; Gojo hates paperwork). 

The sound of running water stops and you hear the bathroom door swing open. You don’t see Gojo when you exit your room but he leaves the door open to release any remaining steam.

There’s a reason why people say showers are good for the mind. You’re happy for those who’ve found it, but that couldn’t be you, because the only thought plaguing your head right now is Gojo—and whether you should greet him goodnight, if you should kiss his cheek or hug him tight. The tension between you now is palpable, an electric current waiting to zap on both ends. 

Your mind is so out of it that you don't realize you’re missing your skincare bag until after you finish brushing your teeth and dressing for bed. You open the bathroom door with the sole intention of going back to your room to get it, but instead, you’re met with a wall of chest.

Gojo’s eyes are wide, bright blue with damp strands of white falling like curtains barely shielding the sky. He’s just as surprised as you are, toothbrush in his hand as you hold up the towel wrapped around your head. 

You’ve seen Gojo in his pajamas many times before—white long sleeves with gray cotton pants, but your eyes trail to his collarbones and the way the bathroom lights cast it under a soft glow. The redness on his cheeks, a visual manifestation of the heat on yours. 

Gojo can’t stop staring at your lips, at how soft they look—at how soft you look fresh out of the shower. The little baby hairs sticking out under your towel are cute, and he leans in without knowing—a pull he can’t seem to resist. For once in his life, Gojo’s mind is still. 

You try to meet him halfway, tiptoeing, but you’re a little out of your element; you don’t know where to put your hands and your heart’s about to explode out of your chest. When your noses touch, you can’t breathe, closing your eyes while you wait for it. 

But it doesn’t come. 

You feel Gojo’s breath stilling before speeding up into little exhales. Something is wrong. You open your eyes and find him staring back at you, a version of Gojo you haven’t seen in a while—that you rarely see ever, except that day during your confrontation in his office. 

Concern laces your features and you move back a little, hands coming up to caress his cheeks. His eyes still look frantic, but they focus on you when you cup his face so gently. 

“Satoru,” you whisper, voice grounding. His breaths slow down a little. 

You realize that it must be true then, what they say, that those who love to be feared, fear to be loved, because you’ve never seen anyone afraid of something so good as Gojo is of this. 

“Satoru,” you repeat, massaging his temples with your thumb, “we don’t have to if you don’t want to.” 

Gojo hates it, how you’ve always had to adjust for him. He hates that he can’t give you this one thing, hates that you’re still so patient, that he’s still so afraid. He swallows, closing his eyes tight before opening them again. 

“I want to,” he chokes out, “I just don’t know—”

You chuckle, without judgment, “I don’t either,” you lean forward, foreheads touching, “but do you want to try together?”

You learn that Gojo sees himself so differently from how you do—and maybe that’s everyone, but Gojo tends to say things while doing the other. He says he can’t bother with kids, but continues to take so many of them under his wing anyway; he calls your cereal concoction disgusting but tastes it regardless; and he says he can’t think about love, doesn’t know how, but proceeds to try so much harder, everyday. 

When you look at Gojo, you see a heart so big, so capable, that he can’t see it himself. 

You nudge his nose with yours and he breathes deeply, closing his eyes once again. If he doesn’t do this now, how much longer ‘till he does? 

Gojo hums before nodding his head slightly. His hands come up to cover yours, toothbrush wedged in the spaces between his fingers; they’re clammy, he’s sure, but he’s kept you waiting long enough. 

When you kiss Gojo for the first time, everything trembles—his pupils, his lips, the breath he takes. It’s all shaky and nervous, but your lips touch and all you know is that you like it there. He’s a little bit stiff but you don’t mind, pressing closer just for a little bit before pulling away. 

Gojo keeps your hands in place, half-lidded eyes staring at you lazily. His ears are fully red now but he’s giving you a look you’ve never seen before—like lightning crackling in the gaps between his eyelids. 

When you kiss Gojo for the first time, you don’t expect it to be by the bathroom door of a rented apartment, while away on a mission. You don’t expect it to be in your pajamas, towel wrapped around your hair as you’re getting ready for bed. You definitely don’t expect him to guide your hands down his neck while he places his on your lower back, squeezing lightly before pulling you in to kiss you again. 

This time, his lips move more pliantly, parting yours slightly; he tastes mint, mixed with the strawberry candy he had earlier and it’s nothing he could have ever imagined before, but is now everything he’s ever wanted. The push and pull between you is magnetic, soft lips and the intermingling of held breaths. All Gojo can think of now is to take, to devour—to keep you with him, like this, always. 

You wonder if Gojo is lying—that he’s never done this before, because you don’t think you can kiss anyone after this and not think of his lips on yours. 

By the time you part, the air is significantly warmer. Your fingers thread through the hair at the base of his neck and you smile, sighing. Gojo looks warm, with his swollen lips and flushed cheeks. 

“That…” you trail off, nudging his nose. 

Gojo looks at you fondly; to ever even think he could have this now, with you—he doesn’t believe in any higher being but you must be his prayer come true. 

“We can practice a bit more, I think.” he pulls you closer, hands gripping your hips. 

You feel it against you, something solid and firm against your stomach and your eyes go wide at the realization; Gojo does the same. 

“Satoru, you–” he moves back and freezes, untangling himself from you completely. There’s a faint outline on the crotch of his pants and your whole face goes red. 

“Let me use the bathroom real quick.” he panics, rushing past you and closing the bathroom door. 

You stand there stunned for a good minute before you shake out of it, laughing. Gojo yells about how you’re being so mean, making fun of him when he’s like this, but you aren’t—not really. 

It’s been a long time getting to this point with Gojo, but considering all things, you think, this might just be the beginning.

thank you notes: i would also like to shoutout @stellamancer for leaving such lovely comments on dybil that it actually kinda pushed me to write this longer piece connected to it!!

comments, tags, and reblogs are greatly appreciated ♡

[kozuyoko]

rant #2: internet watering down alt subcultures

(before or in case some ppl jump me in the replies i just want to clarify that ik this acc revolves around anime content but i’ve been into the goth subculture for a few yrs now and i don’t want ppl to think i’m a poser talking out of my ass just bc i don’t post or repost any goth topics/have a gothic style for my blog )

but um

why do ppl call anything remotely alternative ‘goth’ or ‘emo’…..

im sry but the ‘“i need a goth mommy’ or ‘i love goth girls’ mfs are actually unbearable like no u don’t even know what goth is, you just want a hypersexual e-girl with black hair and bangs with heavy eyeliner (same goes for the ‘i need a metalhead bf’ mfs who just want a tall guy w pretty long hair who plays the electric guitar)

those same ppl have started saying shit like ‘noooo i actually want a trad goth 🥺…um! well..no trad goth wants u..😁😁😁😅

like pls u didn’t know what a trad goth was until goth ppl started joking abt this sort of situation and using them as an examples for ‘goth girls’ that aren’t onlyfans models wearing skimpy black clothes and using goth as a buzzword for engagement, u just want to look good😭

also h8 the people that call themselves goth or emo and get defensive when u tell them they’re not bc they don’t even listen to the music or know about the culture of those scenes

‘omg im so emo😂😂😂’ be srs ur wearing a black t-shirt and u bully actual emos

and i’m not ‘gatekeeping’😭 u called ur self goth, we asked around and heard u said ur fav goth band is deftones LMAOO (b4 u get on my ass im not saying deftones is bad, theyre p cool, just not goth😭)

i genuinely fw people or babybats who take time to learn more about things they’re interested in rather than being an annoying trendhopper who thinks listening to shoegaze, wearing alt clothing and being freaky or smth makes them a ‘dommy goth gf’ or a metalhead😭

one of the biggest perpetrators of this have to be the is abt the tiktok #affliction #y2k #jncos male manipulator ushanka wearing cornballs. some of them r chill but a lot of them STINK!! bc of gekkasanctuary (zero hate i actually love him and follow him on all my ig accs ‼️) getting on some of their fyps they’ve started trendhopping once more and begun to waste their money on jp archive fashion and if six was nine just so they can thirst trap to malice mizer and tag their posts w #vkei. hate them💔

anywho this rant is mostly abt the watering down of the goth subculture and not vkei so don’t let me get carried away, i’ll probably rant abt this sometime next yr since i literally do not post at all😭😭

lastly i do NOT fw the onlyfans ladies who tag their posts w #gothgirl or gross captions with more ‘goth mommy’ stuff and continue to perpetuate stereotypes of all goth women being hyper sexual and dominant ☠️

if ur a goth lady and ur like this there isn’t anything wrong w it or wtv, you do you😭i really jus don’t like the stereotype bc it leads gross men to think all goths want to be sexualized without their consent, barked at in public and asked to peg someone (which has happened to me b4 sadly)

ummmm anwyays conclusion of this rant, i don’t fw trendhoppers , weirdos and ppl who water down alt subcultures and use them as buzzwords to perpetuate stereotypes

this is p much a word salad and nothing i wrote down is going thru my brain anymore so pls take this w a grain of salt, if i made any mean comments i was literally just pissed writing this 😭

[feuqueerfire]

When I Fly Towards You Live Blogging

Need something cute and fun and happy to wash away the DFF tragedies and decided to watch this after I saw a few Tiktoks on this last night. The Tiktoks made me want to watch + it has a really high rating on MDL. I've never watched a het CDrama before (Stay With Me was the only CDrama I've watched + 2 bromance shorts) and they tend to be really long but this one is around SWM length (24 eps w 35min runtime).

Also, I find the male lead's demeanor/way of carrying himself really attractive lol and the female lead is round-ish face girl with black hair and bangs like ah my weakness

Ep 1 (Mar 13)

Another ill-advised time to start a new show, I have so much homework etc to catch up on.

seems like they don't know each other from the beginning? but she's into him lol

her name: Zaizai

oh, her diary. found by the dude

who is this guy who got mistaken as Zhang Lurang supposed to be? are they all gonna get detention together or smth and meet again?

his name: Zhang Lurang

oh lmfaoo Lurang's friend borrowing his books

so this is a new school and they're in grade 10, so did Zaizai and jiang jia (?) transfer in? It feels like maybe high school starts in grade 10 (searched it up and yes). that's also why many people don't know each other yet ig? though there are apparently at least 9 classes per grade so makes sense to not know e/o anyway

oh, her wallet, not her diary

omg she thinks Lurang's name is Guran

I forgot the dubbing kills me

she's so cute, already daydreaming about her and Guran.

they're going to the military base... the tiktok wouldn't already happen would it? I thought it happened after they started dating already

this show is funny heh

pls okay Enough with the mismatched names cuz when other people get involved I become nervous

Cute so far and funny, I hope the name thing gets cleared up soon

Ep 2 (Mar 13)

they do keep meeting each other

pls Lurang just not correcting Zai when she calls him Guran

Zaizai is literally so bold omg volunteering to sign a song in front of everybody + dedicating it to the boy she likes (even if she doesn't know his real name lol)

pls Lurang smiling while looking at Zai wanting to sing with Guran while knowing she means him... menace but he is endeared

Guran is kinda annoying, I think Jiang deserves somebody a little less annoying

ah not him using the "Run if it's raining. Fool" like that she used on him in their 1st encounter at the beginning of ep 1

lowkey also into Jiang and Zai yuri

not into Guran and Lurang yaoi cuz Guran irritates me

Zai is so cute "You're here alone. Do you need me to protect you?" says the one who's afraid of the dark

okay I could get into Jiang and Guran enemies-to-lovers if Guran stops being annoying

Zaizai is sooo cute also hah Lurang following behind her when he'd realized that Zai was scared lol but his nonchalant act is fun

Oh, is the year already over? They're in grade 10 and 16 years old here, does it follow them for a couple years? I know they apparently get married at the end

Ep 3 (Mar 14)

nvm still grade 10

usually in a hetship i like it when the guy likes her more (and that probably is gonna end up being the case here too lol) but i love how bold and proactive Zai is here! Like following Lurang is one thing but she’s also not shy about the fact that she was trying to fit into his ideal type (ahh his smile when she’s crying into her braids) and last ep when she was saying she’ll protect him and this ep paying for Lurang with her bus card ahh it’s cute idk

and then her speaking up when the man was being creepy and when Lurang asks, her being like yeah I was scared but I knew you’d back me up! and then Lurang being the one who gets shy saying he wouldn’t back her up and her being like but you diddd hehe

Ep 4 (Mar 14)

i remember the edit where Lurang is a bit mean to Zaizai and tells her to be quiet had comments about Lurang's step(?)-mother, so yeah ig she doesn't treat him well and compares him to her younger son

ahh they're gonna tutor each other yess

her tugging on his short sleeve is crazy woah i love hetshipping <3

Okay, yknow what Enough! Stand up Zaizai, how are you down bad enough for a teenage boy that you let him finish your whole food? esp one that's meat, i'd offer the guy and be waffling down the rest. He should buy her something now

okayy she at least got him to agree to treat her to a meal later

and Zaizai got him to smile in front of her + also getting his WeChat so true

loll Lurang literally seeing in slow motion when she shows up in casual non-uniform clothes

oh Lurang calling her Su-laoshi (Teacher Su) killed me omg

I guess the Class 1 girl (Ye Zhenxin) will end up being a problem? The one who made fun of Zaizai for being from a non-key class and now also has to stay behind for basketball?

okay fine the boys can defend the girls from the bullies and show off by beating them in basketball

Ep 5 (Mar 14)

At least the Guran and Jiajia misunderstanding got cleared up

hehe rain and umbrella scene

umbrella scene hehe ofc

nooo is Zhenxin gonna accuse Zaizai of stealing the money? Because she saw her treating people to snacks + saw her leave Class 1?

ahh Lurang coming to her defense

plss Lurang seeing her pretend cry with her friends through the window but thinking Zaizai crying for real

glad it got finished quickly within the episode

Ep 6 (Mar 15)

aouuu Lurang waiting for her

plsss not Guran overhearing Jiang Jia telling his doctor dad about her hair loss but thinking she is deathly ill or smth and confessing every time he's wronged her T.T silly af

does Guran's doctor father kinda ship him and Jiang Jia lol

omg a roundabout way of the "MC has love interest running errands for them" trope

heh here's the scene from the edit of Zaizai getting caught by Lurang cheering for another student by calling him "handsome, jjayo!"

Ep 7 (Mar 15)

Ah, Zaizai realizing Lurang's habit of rubbing his neck when he's shy/lies heh

pls not Zaizai's homeroom teacher Mr. Lin being Lurang's uncle

I don't fully understand why Zaizai was so nervous like it's not like she's nervous about the fact that she was studying alone with a guy in his home because she was fine and eager to see Lurang's uncle. Is it because Zaizai thought that Mr. Lin wondered if the two of them were dating that one time before?

the dancing after the play, are they trying to sell me on Guran and Lurang yaoi?

Ep 8 (Mar 15)

omg poor Jiang Jia with a period stain on her skirt but at least the nice girl told her

prince Lurang... I want to be you but also you're attractive

ah Guran fr has a crush on Jiang Jia fr

and yet helping her by letting Qianyu know that she brought all that food for him ah

I'm way more into Guran and Jiang Jia now than I was in the beginning

The grandma telling Guan Fang (?) that he doesn't have to be the focus and the center to shine :(

Ep 9 (Mar 15)

ahh can Lurang or Zaizai just confess like they know they like each otherrrr just date already and I have no hopes of even getting a kiss bc the wedding kiss from the starting credits seems like an angle kiss

omg?! not Zaizai saying she saw Lurang with the kid and saw them in 10 years, that's a crazy thing to say but if you can say that, why can't you confess properly and start dating T.T

ah 2012, end of the world

alksdfj not Lurang purposely making Zaizai jealous heh

hmm okay but spending most of the time with the girl when he knows Zaizai is sad/insecure is >:(

not Lurang's brain turning off practically when in the room alone with Zaizai and leaving ASAP

glad that ended well

Ep 10 (Mar 15)

ohh Guan Fang seemingly easy-going and bullyable but not actually

pls Enough funny misunderstandings for Guran where he's accidentally seen as the hero, i'm just not somebody who can handle the joke being that somebody sees himself as better than he is

omg D: randomly a touching story amidst the jovial mood so far

Ep 11 (Mar 16)

ah, they're apart for a month for New Year's break and Lurang's going back home instead of living with his uncle

loll Zaizai's reaction to Suyang

The way every child is Zaizai's nemesis lmfao

not the gaggle of gossipping aunts and uncles

Started doing 1.25x this ep or the previous ep because 1x was taking a long time rip

Ep 12 (Mar 16)

pls i too initially thought Guran was hiding porn

Aw, ep 10 about Guan Fang and this ep about Guran feeling neglected by his doctor parents who are heroes to other patients but leave him alone.

Are we gonna get smth about Jiang Jia in ep 14? And then delve more into Lurang afterwards? and possibly some Zaizai too? I wonder when the part where Lurang tells Zaizai to be quiet and then she avoids him is gonna happen

Ep 13 (Mar 16)

Guran is so obvious in his crush on Jiang Jia loll

ahh Lurang being jealous thinking it was Su Zaizai righting the love letter to someone, I love jealous Lurang

ohh the jealousy during pull-ups, this was in the edits

Guran, ow "it's not like you'll ever be [Qianyu] anyway"

Ep 14 (Mar 16)

I've really liked thus far how supportive Guran has been in Jiang Jia's crush on Qianyu, like telling her to confess and helping her and encouraging her even though he obviously doesn't want to because he likes her. He just wants her to be brave and chase what she wants. It's a very kind thing to do I guess because like I'm used to fuckass Han Seojun (True Beauty) type characters who insist their their female friend date them and not leave her alone until she does

Y'know idk why I thought it was his step-mother? Feels like I saw it in the comments of a real but I think it's his bio mother maybe since Lurang lives with her teacher brother

now Guran gonna get got by Jiang Jia apparently crying when she didn't cry

"Turns out the sun and sunflower shine for each other" is so true like the connection immediately makes me think of the sunflower facing the sun always but indeed the sun is also shining brightly for the sunflower, not a one-way relationship

Ep 15 (Mar 17)

girl why are we Singing?

ah, grade 11 begins

ouch, Guran always having to help Jiang Jia with Qianyu or the other way around

"Report to me if you notice anything" girl

bro the way we're having problems about Lurang and Zaizai dating or liking each other or spending time together or whatever at school but these fuckers aren't even properly dating yet T.T

omg D: is this gonna be the start of Lurang telling Zaizai to be quiet but she's gonna be hurt?

aww poor Zaizai who was already facing the rumour that she's some girl who's bothering key-class-Lurang and now Lurang being rude to her

Ep 16 (Mar 17)

immediately started this new ep, which doesn't happen with this show usually because the eps tend to end well but i'm too into the angst rn, I've been looking forward to it since the edits

but Lurang's not the one who told them about the transfer D: T.T

and omg Lurang's so bad at speaking too

I'll guess that this guy is her cousin or smth?

lolll not him fueling the fire talking about how he didn't tell an annoying girl in the next class about his transfer

indeed he's her cousin

ahh Zaizai getting Lurang to act cute for her

So, Lurang's brother is younger than him but is gonna be doing grade 12 test even though he's in grade 11? i'm confused girl

oh I see, he's a 10th grade age in 12th grade

aghhh like I can understand Lurang's frustration esp since he's a teenager but also Luli is also just 16 and in a new place where he only knows his brother and is also the focus of gossip even though they're praising him T.T I hope they become closer or at least more friendly :(

bruh, call Lurang to let them know that Luli's been found

Oh man, the bias and favouritism is wayyyy too much fr

I can handle this much tragic backstory for a male love interest like it's sad but not like every tragedy piled on

Ep 17 (Mar 17)

aw he's really leaving for a year :(

I really don't fully get what the status of this relationship is cuz she's saying happy 1 year anniversary lol like they both know they're lowkey in a relationship but they just... don't Talk about it I guess?

Ep 18 (Mar 17)

plss not the girl thinking Zaizai edited the pic of her and Lurang lmfaoo but at least Zaizai's happy and excited knowing he doesn't accept gifts from girls or anything

"Let's not give up on our dreams for the other" so true

I read a comment that said the grandma will be okay so that's good

Ep 19 (Mar 18)

I'll be honest, it's kinda hard for me to keep picking up this show cuz I just wanna watch a BL with dubcon/weird/uncomfortable dynamics instead.

ah, so they're talking about Confessing now like girl I wish I knew why your situationship is like this

pls not Lurang being like hmm Su zaizai, act normal *nods nods*

plsss not her signalling by saying my parents want me to get married at 30, so much get engaged by 29, should meet my partner's parents by 28 and need to have dated 10 years for that, so I need to start dating at 18

this tarot reading lmfao

bruh not the Guran and Jiang Jia

ahh confession finally and a cute one too hehe

hug !!!

oof, Guran leaving fr

Ep 20 (Mar 18)

ahh that's not even a kiss but so true i'm giggling

omgg a kiss hehehe esp bc Lurang learned copy-and-paste

Doraemon reference

Ah, she said "Rang-rang, you're the best" and it sounds like ZB1 Zhang Hao's name

ahhh no way both Lurang and the senior tried to say "here" for Su Zaizai to cover for her absence byeee

but i do like it when either of them get jealous cuz it's like cute but not Too Much lol

This ep had the military scenes from the tiktok that I'd watched. Also had the fantasy of everybody finding out that the FL is dating the cool handsome ML which is fun, we love.

Ep 21 (Mar 18)

and Zaizai cleverly letting the senior know that she has a boyfriend

why is there no fucking music during their kiss scenes is it because of youtube? is there music on Viki?

Ah, there is indeed music in the Viki version, I'll just continue watching that one

hah paying rent for staying in Zaizai's heart via kisses

Okayyy now it's Lurang's turn to have somebody interested in him while perhaps Zaizai is a bit jealous hehe, though I hope this girl also ends up bowing out gracefully like Zaizai's senior and less like the catty girl from high school

smh the girls in these really are Very Meddling huh? i guess there's appeal in that too even if I'm not super into it

loll saw these moments in tiktoks too

I really like it when Lurang sometimes widens his eyes when looking at Zaizai in a teasing way

Zaizai's parents are sooo funny lol

Ep 22 (Mar 19)

"You match my bed so well" while sitting him on the bed and grabbing his face like this, oh Su Zaizai you get me

dang, we've gotten multiple kisses and an allusion to sex and they also live together, idk why I expected it to be more chaste. Ig since they started out in high school + literally didn't start Dating until graduation, I thought it'd remain that way. obviously it's still not hot and heavy or anything and the kissing scenes are just closed lips pressed together but still

Did Lurang just notice Jiang Jia and Guran tension or did Guran tell him?

i don't remember who this Wan Nan is unfortunately lmfao I thought the senior that Jiang Jia liked was the prince charming in Cinderella play but maybe not who knows

had to pause to scream a little at the boss touching Zaizai's hand/leg >:(

Let's kill this boss wtf

Ep 23 (Mar 19)

my poor Su Zaizai, I hate this evil boss man >:(

ah Guran having to be told by somebody else that Jiang Jia likes him while Jiang Jia also never made a move despite thinking that Guran probably maybe likes her

Ep 24 (Mar 19)

last ep

man I'm gonna stop being practical or thinking because the thought of Lurang buying a house By Himself for them to live in just gave me the ick like why...?

ahhh proposal so cuteee also interesting to see a proposal that's not "Will you marry me?" "Yes" "yay she said yes!" even though the beats are the same

oh, scandelous, Lurang opened like one shirt button and slipped the sleeve off of Zaizai's shoulder lol

ahhh the wedding cuteee

Su Zaizai angry face and then biting Luran's arm heh

oh they're having a baby

ahh, them in their school uniforms again from the last scene, sooo cute

Overall:

This isn't the show's fault at all but I think I'm just in the mood for a BL, so occasionally I'll think of just pausing the show to watch a BL in the middle lol or to go watch some BL edits (esp because I'm using this fluffy cuteness to try to get over Dead Friend Forever TeeWhite tragedy). This doesn't tend to happen when I'm actually watching the show because for more of the eps, I'm watching it like :D ^.^ :) :> happy smiles and giggles, so it's not the show's fault but rather me craving some yaoi cuz it took like a week to watch this lol

This was so cute, I liked the characters and their characterizations, I liked the friend group (more than I thought I would at first bc I was annoyed by Guran in the beginning), I liked their romance. I liked how they were mutually helping each other achieve their goals and paths in life. It was just cute. They had a 1 year long-distance thing in the middle where they were obviously sad but they got through it. I like that they trusted each other and liked each other and were nice to each other. Su Zaizai and Lurang, you're so cute!

Love that so much of this was them while in a relationship! Like they were in a "kinda relationship but we don't talk about it or define" for a while there during high school but even after officially becoming a couple after graduation, there are many eps of them in uni and at jobs and such. I love an established relationship situation and this delivered (want this for my BLs so bad). They got through situations together, no unnecessary breakup or terrible miscommunication, ah just feel good and cute but entertaining without becoming a bore.

It's just good and cute and endearing. Liked it. I don't necessarily think I'll think about them a whole lot, especially because everything is wrapped up so nicely, but I think the show did a lot of things well.

Rating: 6.5/10 [May 12, 2024 Update: Decreased by 0.5 stars when rerating shows I've watched in 2024: 7 -> 6.5]

Tiktoks - Before watching:

Saw this Tiktok edit while going through an account for TeeWhite (DFF) edits and

the most popular Tiktok of this show made me wanna watch

+ this one like omg idk why I’m so excited to see him get jealous/grovel I don’t know this man

Okay wait I saw this (pretend crush) on a reel before, I didn’t know this was from the same drama, no wonder the name seemed familiar.

[idontknowbutitsbjutifl]

#im just tired#im trying to figure it out on my own#any tips how get my shit together?#pls no 'go to therapy'#i aint ready for this for now

Sry for reblog but reacting to your tags would be too long for a comment : D Putting it on sideblog! Lemme know if you want me to delete it though <3 - Teryster

List of things that helped me/saved my ass before going to therapy:

I accepted as fact that I cannot DO anything until I'm safe, financially secure, well fed, slept 8 hours, feel clean, talked to a friend and worked out/stretched. Those are basic needs, not a treat or lucky accident. I forgive myself for not being functional if I didn't fulfill my needs first.

Tying to that, I got rid of abusive/toxic environment. It was very hard and I wasn't half aware of what was happening, but once I did it, it was like dropping dead weight and seeing clear for the first time. I was afraid I'm not gonna make it on my own - but once I was free of the abuse, I had suddenly more energy, clearer mind and I wasn't so afraid. I was capable to handle being alone and taking care of myself because I gained Safety.

I started thinking of myself as a machine that needs to cool off, get cleaned, repaired, upgraded or refuelled.

I learned to see all parts of me (body, brain, whatever) as my own team I'm fond of and not an enemy that backstabs me. I kid you not that shit did WONDERS - once I viewed my body as my friend, it started working FOR ME. Damn bruh

I stopped lying to people ("I can't go to work I broke my leg" while I was just crying in bed, or telling people I'm ok when I'm not, or cancelling a meetup telling people I got too much work while in reality I was too depressed to talk to anyone) and became honest - it was then way easier to be honest with myself too.

If I have Bad Days, I go through a list of things that could have caused it (because I can't tell like other people can I guess lol) and if I find nothing, I proclaim that day a Take It Easy Day. I don't expect anything from myself and anything I do is a Victory. It will pass, and it will pass faster if I just let it happen and wash away. If I fight it it gets worse, for me at least!

I don't keep my thoughts for myself - I either share them with friends that I have established healthy boundaries with, or I write it, or vent it through smth. But I do Process those thoughts and emotions (or more like I'm still learning : D). Keeping it in, even if it's the dumbest cringe thought, makes my brain so much worse. It's like wiping your brain free of rot.

I recognized that I'm never gonna be "normal" and it's always going to be struggle, but I had days now where I woke up and felt good and felt HAPPY. Comparing it to my worst days, it's definitely worth to fight for.

I stopped calling my to do list as list of things I need to do, but now I call it "getting rid of stressors" fkjfkjf Somehow it really motivates me to get shit done!

When I encounter a Fear (checking an email, calling a doctor, etc) I push myself to RUN INTO IT HEAD ON RIGHT THERE RIGHT NOW. Sometimes it's hysterical - I was once opening my postal box while softly yelling, but I did it!! It's still hard for me this one but it helped SO MUCH with those endless weeks/months of fearing something and then finally doing it and wow guess what, it wasn't bad at all : D

I take time to celebrate victories, but spend little time mourning failures. Still not so good at this but the system helped so much with depression!!

I identified the toxic cycles I can get into sometimes and I can now tell when they're coming (most of the time OTL) and avoid them! Like, for example, self-fullfilling prophecy where I subconciously want to fail on purpose to Be Right about myself being a failure. Like no, bitch, we work for success lets go!!

I found a really fun, fulfilling job that has a Meaning to me

I live with friends that share my interests and we help each other!

I watch funny videos of americans failing at shit and being dumb uvu instant boost

I don't appreciate my brain being a little bitch like sir can u stop making me depressed? give me a break bro 😞