#please marvel give him a happy ending
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floofweaver · 8 months ago
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breaks my heart every time watching this scene 😭 God Sebastian Stan did such a great job
microdosing on catharsis by watching a fictional character or persona i relate to have an emotional breakdown until my chest starts to ache from the amount i've repressed
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i-ran-into-a-lampost · 6 months ago
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Everybody decided that this guy needs to go through hell like canon wasn't enough for y'all PLEASE
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lalah-cupcake · 1 year ago
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tangled
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wonderjanga · 16 days ago
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When Billy was a Newbie
I like to think some of these scenarios happened when Billy was first starting out as a hero.
Villain: *monologging*
Marvel: *doesn’t even let them finish and socks the shit out of them and takes them to the police department*
This happens a good twenty times until one villain has enough.
Villain: *monologging*
Marvel: *about to attack while they’re talking*
Villain: “OKAY WAIT WAIT WAIT, STOP RIGHT THERE YOU BASTARD.”
Marvel: *stops, confused*
Villain: “I know you’re new to this whole thing, but you do realize you’re supposed to let us monologue and tell you our evil plan, right?! You’re not supposed to cut us off!”
Marvel: “I’m not?”
Villain: “No!”
Marvel: “Oh. I’m sorry about that, Mx. Supervillain. I’ll let you and the other ones talk next time.”
Villain: “Wait, really?”
After this, he actually does end up letting them talk and all that.
I also think something like this would happen when he was getting used to fighting crime.
Marvel: *throws one of the big blue mail boxes at some low level, human, emphasis on human, crooks* “Oh… my bad, guys! I was a little too harsh.”
Crooks: *severely injured* “What do you mean ‘your bad’?!?????? That was a little more than harsh!”
Then, there’s the fact I think he wouldn’t care about where he’s saving people. By that I mean, Billy has a lot of free time because he doesn’t go to school. Because of this, you’ll casually see Captain Marvel in flipping Milwaukee helping some people who got into a car crash, then in Orlando helping out with a fire, then in San Jose helping someone who lost their dog. Point is, if there’s someone to help out, he’ll help. Through this, he met Superman actually. Funnily enough, it was while holding up a building.
Marvel: *holding up a building*
Supes: *flies down* “You’re Captain Marvel, right?”
Marvel: “Huh? Uh yeah?” *looks over Superman, seeing his suit and thinking he’s another hero (Billy doesn’t know most heroes because this was when the time bubble recently popped)
Supes: “You need a hand with that?”
Marvel: “Yes, please.”
Supes and Marvel: *work together to move the building to somewhere safe so it won’t hurt anyone*
Marvel: “Thanks.”
Supes: “No problem.”
*awkward silence*
Supes: “If I can ask, what brought you to Metropolis?”
Marvel: “I’m here to fight crime…?” *says like it’s super obvious*
Supes: “Wha? Don’t you have your own city?”
Marvel: “I mean, I guess. Fawcett isn’t really my city though. I just protect it.”
Supes: *blanking and trying to come up with something to say* “Captain, you can’t just go around in other hero’s cities and fight crime for them. It’s a breach of territory.”
Marvel: “It is?”
Supes: “Yes, it is. Honestly, I’m just happy you didn’t do this in Gotham. Batman would’ve been furious.”
Marvel: “Oh. Okay then… so just stick to cities that don’t have heroes?”
Supes: “Well, I guess but don’t you normally-”
Marvel: *beaming smile* “I appreciate the advice, Mr. Superman.”
Supes: “Your…welcome? Wait, what do you mean ‘stick to the cities that don’t have heroes’?”
Marvel: “Oh, well, when crimes slow and nothing’s going on in Fawcett, I kind of just fly around everywhere looking for stuff to do. Just the other day I helped these two old, farmer people, husband and wife, lift their tractor out of some mud.”
Supes: *a little astounded he has that much time on his hands* “Really? Where was that?”
Marvel: “Kansas. I think the town they lived in was Smallville or something?”
Supes: *nearly shits himself* “Ah… I see.”
Then there was the time he met a random Green Lantern. He had no idea what the Lantern Corp were, but any information Solomon gave him made them sound cool though. But you want to know the worst part of this interaction? The Lantern was trying to give Marvel a ring.
Random GL (RGL): *talking about how he wanted to give Billy the ring and yadayadayada*
Marvel: *not even listening due to the Gods talking a whole lot*
Mercury: “BILLY STEAL THE RING!”
Marvel: *saying this out loud* “What? What ring?”
RGL: *confused, says something Billy isn’t paying attention to*
Mercury: “THE RING ON HIS FINGER. KEEP UP WITH THE PROGRAM.”
Marvel: *still talking out loud* “Oh okay okay… how do I do that?”
Solomon: “You are supposed to use your will.”
Marvel: “Huh? Solomon there’s no way that’ll wor…” *trails off as he wills the ring off the lantern’s finger* “I take back what I said.”
RGL: *starts to fall*
Marvel: “Holy moly!” *rushes down to catch him*
RGL: “Earthling what the hell is wrong with you?! Why would you do that??!?”
Marvel: “I’m sorry! The voices has told me to.” *gives them back their ring*
RGL: *flies off grumbling how he’s a psychopath*
Then there was when Marvel joined the Justice League. When he got the communicator, he put it in his pocket dimension and promptly forgot about it.
Marvel: “The Justice League hasn’t contacted me. I wonder if I’ve done something wrong…”
Meanwhile…
Batman: “This is like the third meeting he’s missed, Clark.”
Supes: “I know, I know! I’m sorry! He didn’t seem like the type to skip out on meetings. He talked like he had a bunch of free time.”
WW: “You should go talk to him. You are the one who invited him.”
Supes: *sighs* “I will.”
Back in Fawcett…
Marvel: *helping a cat down from a tree*
Supes: *flies down when he sees him* “Captain! Can we talk?”
Marvel: *hands cat back to its owner* “Mr. Superman. Of course! I’ve actually had something I’ve been meaning to talk about with you too.”
Supes: “Right, well I guess I’ll cut straight to the point. Is there a reason you haven’t shown up to the last meetings?”
Marvel: *stares at him with the most confused face* “Meetings?”
Supes: *confused at Billy’s confusion* “Yes? You get notified on your comm about them.”
Marvel: “Comm… Comm?” *thinking face before recognition flits across his face* “Wait, this thing?” *reaches hand into pocket dimension and pulls out his JL comm*
Supes: *slightly horrified when he saw his arm disappear for a moment* “Yeah. That.”
Marvel: *taps comm and sees over 45 unread notifications* “Oh.”
Supes: *wondering how in the world Marvel never checked his comm* “Oh indeed.”
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svtiddiess · 2 months ago
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Soft Serenity
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Synopsis: Watching your boyfriend sleep is one of the best things in the world.
Pairing: Jeonghan x gn!reader
Genre: fluff, one shot
Rating: sfw
Word count: 529
Warnings: none! Lemme know if I missed anything!
Note: Need me a Jeonghan right now ㅠㅠ
@tomodachiii I told you he'd get a happy ending! Now, please stop screaming at me.
Click here to join my taglist!
Reblogs are appreciated ♡
.ᐟMinors/blank/no age indicator blogs will be blocked.ᐟ
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Safe. That's what you felt at the moment, in your boyfriend's arms as you watched him sleep. Streaks of sunlight peak in through the blinds, illuminating your boyfriend's face and making him look more ethereal than he already does. His blonde hair, which he recently dyed for the upcoming comeback, frames his face, truly making him look like an angel.
You smile at the thought of your boyfriend being known as an 'angel' among his fans when, in fact, he's quite the opposite. Not a day goes by when you're not dealing with the consequences of dating this angel-like devil. But you know for a fact that you wouldn't give it up for the world.
Ever since you met Jeonghan, every day has been an adventure. Even if most days you spend with him are at home cuddling, he somehow always manages to keep you on your toes, either through cheeky remarks or 'harmless' pranks. You can't imagine your life before you met him; it seemed so monotonous and bland, like something was always missing. And when you met Jeonghan, it finally clicked; he was the puzzle piece that was missing in your life.
You bring your focus back to the man in front of you. You gently use your finger to trace his beautiful features, careful not to wake him. You've always marvelled at how beautiful Jeonghan looked, even admitting to him that he looked more beautiful than you, to which he laughed and cooed, saying that to him, you're the most beautiful thing in the entire universe.
Your finger stops when you reach his lips, which are pouting due to his face being squished by the pillow. You'd never admit this to him, but you're addicted to his lips. You can kiss him for hours and still want more. The feeling of his lips on your skin always makes you shudder, even if it is just an innocent peck on the cheek. You lean forward to place a gentle kiss on his pouting lips, silently giggling to yourself.
Jeonghan's pout turns into a smile as he shifts to bring you closer to him, causing you to let out a small squeak. He then places a kiss on the corner of your lips before snuggling his face into your neck.
"Sorry, did I wake you?" You softly ask, moving your hands to thread them in his hair. He shakes his head.
"I've been awake this whole time," he mumbles into your neck, and you swear you can feel him smile.
"So you knew I was watching you this whole time?!" You could feel your cheeks heat up at the thought of Jeonghan catching you admiring him.
"You looked so happy, so I just let you be," he hums, "plus it felt nice."
"You're going to tease me about it later, aren't you?"
"Definitely."
You let out a defeated sigh as you continue to rake your fingers through his hair. With Jeonghan, there's definitely no winning. But with him, there definitely will be happiness, excitement, comfort, safety, and serenity. You feel him place a kiss on your neck, making you giggle softly.
"I love you."
"I love you too."
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viceroywrites · 3 months ago
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deja vu - part 2
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planning out your road trip through the pacific northwest, you find yourself inexplicably drawn to the town of gravity falls.
little did you know that this town held more memories than you could have possibly imagined.
too bad you didn't remember any of them.
stan x fem!reader/ford x fem!reader
choose your own ending / contains fluff and angst (w/ happy ending)
(if you would like a link to the playlist i created for this series, lmk!)
part one | part three
tag list: @awitchersbard / @theilluminatidragonqueen / @jazzypop-op/ @maryclanders/ @chaimshelii/@starship606/ @swimmingrascalbatdragon / @stanfordsbaby / @gxstiess / @skrunkle11 / @valinbean / @funkyenby / @therealgoofygoober69 / @theblueraven / @adrian920155 / @im-kinda-bored / @miarabanana / @uwauiss / @leo4242564 / @doggosnoodles12 / @soupieoopieisloopie / @zhungxi / @bandaids-n-porcelain / @marvelous-maniac / @opossumclown
It was a tense interaction following your question. 
Ford’s eyebrows raised in alarm and he carefully approached you, “Of course, we’ve met before, it’s me, Stanford.”
You pause, glancing between Stanley and his twin before replying hesitantly, “Sorry, the name doesn’t ring a bell. I just learned your name a few seconds ago from your brother.”
Ford’s lips narrow into a thin line, vexation written all over his face, “I know we parted ways on less than ideal terms, Y/N, but there’s no reason to pretend like you don’t recognize me.”
Your eyebrow raised at Ford’s firm stance, crossing your arms, “I’m sorry to say but I truly don’t. Maybe you have me mistaken for someone else perhaps?” You can’t help but get defensive, feeling accused that you were blowing off this complete stranger.
“Oh, I’m not mistaken. I know you very well, Y/N. I know that you got your Masters in Geology at Backupsmore. I know that ammolite is your favorite gemstone. I know that you learned hamboning from Fiddleford just to get on my nerves.” Ford counters you with facts, his own stubbornness coming through as you stare each other down.
Your eyes widen at the amount of detail Ford seems to know about you, “How do you know all these things about me? How do you know Fiddleford? Did you help him with his research out here?”
Ford sighs heavily, “I know I messed up back then and I know you must hate me but can you please drop this childish charade?” His low voice raises slightly in volume as his frustration mounts as he finally snaps at you. 
“Ford!” Stan cuts in between the two of you, catching both of you off guard, “Lay off her… I genuinely think she doesn’t… remember.” He sighs, putting the pieces together surprisingly quickly compared to his brother. He grabs his twin by the arm, pulling him off to the side, “Give us a second, we’ll be right back.” Stan says to you, giving you an apologetic stare.
You nod slowly as you decide to take a seat on the steps, watching as the sun slowly begins to set in the horizon. This new information perplexes you as you try to wrack your brain if Fiddleford had ever mentioned working with someone during his time in Gravity Falls. 
Meanwhile, the Pines twins walk off into the distance, just out of ear shot. “So who is she?” Stan questions, needing answers from his brother before he can present his finding. Ford bristles at  the question, stuffing his hands in his pockets as he looks off into the distance before answering, “Remember when we were out at sea commiserating on past romances… and I told you how I had met someone during my time in college but she left after I had gotten too deep into my involvement with Bill.”
“Yeah, vaguely, I thought you were just making that up to try and relate to my stories about my ex-wives. You never were smooth with the ladies.” Stan admits with a shrug to which Ford rolls his eyes at. “Well, that’s her. The age old cliche of the one that got away.” Ford summarizes, “But she was never this petty before. I know I hurt her immensely but…”
“She’s not being petty, poindexter. Haven’t you figured it out yet?” Stan sighs, running a hand over his face in exasperation. Ford stares back blankly at him, unsure how to respond. “God, you’re supposed to be the smart one here. Remember your old friend McGucket’s invention? You know the one that can literally erase memories? The one that erased all my memories?” Stan spells it out for his brother.
It all clicks in Ford’s head, “You don’t think… Fiddleford wiped her memory, do you?” 
“Ding, ding, we got a winner!” Stan says sardonically, “Took ya long enough.”
“Why would he do that? I need to get to the bottom of this, Stanley…” Ford looks over his brother’s shoulder, staring at you. Despite the time that has passed, you look just as vibrant as he remembered you, your features highlighted in the orange glow of the sunset. 
Stan notices the longing look on his brother’s face and places a hand on his shoulder, “You know she’s supposed to head out tomorrow morning? Got a whole road trip planned ahead.”
“Well, let’s see if she’d at least be willing to stick around to talk to Fiddleford.” Ford says with steely determination as he begins to walk back towards you, Stan following at his heels.
You look up as the pair walk up to you, able to see them side by side. There were distinct differences in terms of style but they were nearly identical, only just now picking up the cleft in Stanford’s chin and their different glasses. 
Ford mulls over his choice of words. Despite being the more logical twin, Ford had to admit he was perhaps just as stubborn as his brother. “My apologies for my directness. I know you may not remember me, but please trust me when I say that we have an extensive history together. What if we were to visit Fiddleford tomorrow to perhaps quell your doubts and clarify some things?” He offers, hoping in the back of his mind that you’ll say yes.
You pause at the offer, thinking it through. You had the urge to decline, still on the defense. After all, this man pretty much accused you of acting like a child when you didn’t recognize him.
However, you did wish to see Fiddleford again, so curious about what happened to him after all these years. 
“Alright, I’ll stay another day in Gravity Falls to see Fiddleford. But I want to know a little bit more about you.” Your eyes narrow in on Ford. Stan clears his throat, very aware of the tension between the two of you. “Well, I’m gonna go take care of… the broken thing inside...” He grumbles out the last part, making an awkward escape as he walks past you up the steps before pausing at the door to address you, “Come back inside whenever you and Sixer are done talking, I’ll clear out one of the rooms so you can stay for the night.”
Before you can protest, Stan closes the screen door behind him, giving you and Ford some privacy.
“So you had some questions for me?” Ford sighs, deciding to take a seat next to you. It felt so strange to be so close to you physically after all this time yet so distant due to your loss of memories, wishing that he could pull you into a tight embrace and apologize for everything that happened in the past. 
“Well, I’m assuming if you know Fiddleford and somehow know that I got my Masters in Geology that you went to Backupsmore as well.” You start there, knowing the common thread that connects the two of you is the university you all attended, “That’s correct, not my first choice obviously.” Ford replies with a nod.
“Is it anyone’s first choice?” You comment which pulls a chuckle from Ford who shakes his head. “Very true, I know it wasn’t either of ours. Fiddleford was just elated to be the first in his family to even go.”
“So what did you major in?” You ask with a tilt of your head, “And how did you meet Fiddleford?”
“What didn’t I major in is the better question. I technically have 12 PhDs but my main focuses were Physics and Molecular Biology.”  Ford admitted with a sense of pride, your jaw almost dropping at this information. ”As for how I met Fiddleford, I had proposed a theory in class one time that immediately got shot down by my professor. But Fiddleford shared my passion for pushing boundaries of existing theories and knowledge and we spent the whole night trying to prove it had validity.” Ford said, smiling at that particular memory. 
You note the admiration in Ford’s voice as he speaks of Fiddleford, knowing that their relationship must be close. “I’m so confused… how do I not remember you if you and Fiddleford have such a close relationship?” You sigh, second guessing your own memories at this point. All this information felt like it made sense logically but it was difficult to suspend your disbelief. You hesitate to ask the question, “How... did we meet?”
Ford pauses, staring out into the forest, unable to meet your gaze as he recounts your first meeting. It seems so distant but it was a simple time before life got complicated. 
Before he made your lives complicated. 
Before he can reply, you cut him off, seeing the pained look in his eyes and realizing you may have gone too far. Whoever you were to him, something must have happened between the two of you that led to this reaction. “Actually, don’t answer that… It's getting late and I know we’ll have all of tomorrow to go over this with Fiddleford.” 
“Right… we should probably call it for the evening.” Ford lets out a sigh of relief, getting up from his spot on the steps. He offers his hand, your eyes flicking towards it and noting the six fingers that were facing towards you. Realizing what you’re staring at, he is about to withdraw his hand, an embarrassed flush to his cheeks, but you take it, your warm fingers wrapping around his palm, as you stand up. 
“Are you heading inside?” You ask, still holding into his hand. He realizes you have yet to let go and basks in the moment, fighting the urge to intertwine his fingers with yours. “I’m going to stay out here for a bit longer. I should probably fix that invention that I was working on before…” Ford admits, almost waiting for you to scold him like you would in the past.
But you don’t.
Instead, you nod in understanding, squeezing Ford’s hand one final time before letting go. “Alright, I’m gonna head inside and see where I’m sleeping for the night…” You begin to walk towards the doorway before pausing at the door. 
“Hey… I’m sorry I don’t remember you. I really hope tomorrow something sparks my memory.” You say, “Good night, Stanford.” You disappear behind the doorway, not waiting for him to respond.
Ford stares as he watches your frame retreat from behind the door, “Good night, Y/N… my dear.” The old pet name feeling heavy on his tongue but he can’t help but let it out.
-
As you stare up at the ceiling, you wonder how you even ended up in a storage room inside a tourist trap, laying on an air mattress.
Your trip - at least for the next day or so - is derailed. You’re thankful that Stan had offered to let you stay in the Mystery Shack as you were planning on sleeping in your car underneath the stars, drained from today’s turns of events and too tired to drive into town to try and find some sort of accommodation.
Yet your trip isn’t even the most pressing thing on your mind.
Who is Stanford Pines?
Your eyes shut tightly, trying to mull over the potential possibilities of how you might know this man who vehemently claims to know you. You knew you were getting older but there’s no way your memory was this shot, especially considering the fact that Ford had shared that he and Fiddleford were close friends and went to Backupsmore.
Your mind continued to draw blanks, unable to pinpoint a single memory that involved him.
Yet something about him was so familiar. Maybe that’s why a sense of deja vu had hit you the moment you met his brother and walked through the Mystery Shack.
Finally, fatigue hits you and you are able to fall asleep, slipping into a new dream.
You find yourself back at Backupsmore, walking through the quad and making your way to the library. The campus is decorated in hues of orange and yellow, autumn leaves scattered across the grass. Your boots crunching against the leaves as you weave through the bodies that mill around to and from class.
A gust of wind hits your face, wincing as the harshness against your skin as you had forgotten to bring a scarf on your trek. You finally make it to the library, opening the heavy doors to be greeted to the warmth and scent of old paperback books. 
You walk past the front desk, making your way directly to the back of the library to the stacks. You pass the mostly empty study carrels one by one, looking for someone specific.
You get to the very end of what seemed like a never ending maze and see a table tucked into the corner, surrounded by bookshelves. A broad-shouldered figure, wearing a sweater vest, sits facing away from you, their head buried in the pile of books around them. 
Your lips begin to move, calling out a name to address the person before you.
Stanford.
You wake up in a startle, your heartbeat pounding in your ears as you feel a sudden pressure on your chest. Your eyes adjust to the sight in front of you, seeing a blur of pink, thinking you’re still dreaming. Rubbing your eyes vigorously, you realize there’s a pig sniffing your face in curiosity.
“God, what have I gotten myself into?” You groan out groggily, laying back in defeat as Waddles begins to lick your cheek.
-
Meanwhile in the kitchen, Ford sits awkwardly in front of an audience of his great nephew and niece who are gaping at him in awe, just having explained the whole situation to them as they questioned who’s car was parked in the front of the Mystery Shack.
Stan sips from a mug that spells ‘World’s Greatest Grunkle’ that Mabel made him, a slightly amused grin spreading across his face. The look on their faces was priceless, he thinks to himself, wishing he could take a photo of it. Though, he was in their shoes just last night, still processing that his poindexter brother actually landed someone after all those years of fearing girls and that she somehow ended up stranded on the side of the road just as he was driving back home.
He was just grateful though that his brother wasn’t around for the parts where he was clearly smooth talking to you, unaware that you were his twin’s ex-lover.
“Oh my god, Grunkle Ford, this is amazing!” Mabel exclaims, her eyes sparkling with excitement and mischief, “See, I’ve been trying to figure who the ideal candidate would be to match you with but I couldn’t think of anyone in Gravity Falls. Maybe you two can rekindle your romance! We just need to do what we did with Grunkle Stan and show her things to remind her of your time together!” 
“Or maybe her memories are stored where the Society of the Blind Eye held Old Man McGucket’s memories? There were a ton of Gravity Falls citizens’ names in there, I’m sure she’s somewhere in that pile.” Dipper offers as a suggestion, more invested in understanding how to restore memory loss from the Memory Gun than Mabel’s romantic plans for her uncle. 
Though he had to admit that there was a sliver of him that was rooting for his Grunkle Ford in the romance department.
“Those are excellent suggestions, kids. I’m hoping perhaps talking to Fiddleford today will be one of the first steps into getting her memory back. There is one issue though with your suggestion, Mabel.” Ford admits, slightly crestfallen, “I don’t really have anything left from our time we were together. When she left, she took all remnants of her, photos of us together, letters she wrote to me. What I do have left I’m not sure if it will be effective in bringing those memories back.”
“What is it, Grunkle Ford? Maybe we can still use it, you never know if you don’t try!” Mabel said in reassurance.
Ford hesitated, feeling Dipper, Mabel and Stan’s eyes trained on him, waiting for a response. 
Thankfully, your presence saved him in the nick of time, clearing your throat awkwardly. This catches everyone’s attention, Dipper and Mabel’s head whipping around. You stand in the entrance to the kitchen, still clad in your pajamas and your hair tousled from sleep, holding Waddles in your arms.
“Sorry if I’m interrupting, I just wanted to make sure this pig is supposed to be in here. He somehow got into my room.” You say, noticing how Waddles squirms now in your arms as he sees Mabel. You put him down and watch him scurry to Mabel who eagerly scoops him into her arms, nuzzling his pink cheek. 
“You’re all good, we were just having breakfast. Need a cup of coffee?” Stan says nonchalantly, grabbing the coffee pot that was by his elbow. You nod eagerly, walking towards him and taking the mug that he poured you. “These are me and Ford’s grandniece and nephew, by the way, since you didn’t get to meet them last night. They’re staying here for the summer.” Stan gestures to the two twins that are staring at you like you had a second head.
“Nice to meet you, I’m Mabel! Sorry about Waddles, he kinda wanders around the house if I’m not awake yet.” The energetic brunette introduces herself. “No need to apologize, he was very sweet. If anything, he got me out of bed to get my day started. I’m Y/N, by the way.” You say with a relaxed smile.
“I’m Dipper, nice to meet you. Grunkle Stan was just telling us how you ended up staying here.” The more relaxed male counterpart to Mabel chimed in, trying to move the conversation away from the topic discussed prior to you entering the room. Ford let out a slight sigh of relief, grateful that he was no longer in the hot seat.
“Well, your Grunkle Stan saved me from having to spend a pretty penny on a tow truck and a place to stay so I’m very grateful for that.” You chuckle, getting used to the term ‘Grunkle’.
“Sooo, Y/N, mind if I do a little Q&A with you? Since you’ll be staying here, I wanna get to know you better!” Mabel said eagerly, mentally mapping out her questions already. You blink owlishly before your eyes flick between Stan and Ford in amusement, “Fire away, Mabel. Though I hope your Grunkles didn’t put you up to this as a little payback for when I interrogated them yesterday?”
“She questioned you too?” Ford says in surprise to his brother who scratches chin mindlessly. “A little bit after finishing up the tour I gave her of the Mystery Shack. This one’s ruthless, no wonder she works for the government!” Stan taunts, causing you to roll your eyes. 
“Wait, you work for the government?” Dipper asks, his eyes slightly narrowing in skepticism. You blink at his almost defensive reaction before elbowing Stan in the side who almost chokes on his coffee, “I literally asked you three questions. Don’t listen to him, I work for the National Parks, not the CIA.” 
Dipper visibly relaxes and Mabel’s eyes linger on where you elbowed Grunkle Stan, picking up on how relaxed you seemed around him compared to Grunkle Ford. In fact, you had barely acknowledged Ford this morning, standing by the counter next to Stan. Mabel decides to take matters into her own hands, playing matchmaker as she gets up from her chair. 
“Well that answers one of my questions. By the way, take a seat, Y/N! You’re our guest and I’m finished with my pancakes!” She walks over to you, pulling you by the hand as you plop onto the chair that is coincidentally right next to Ford. “Thanks Mabel..” You roll with the situation before looking over at Ford who stares at you with what seems to be pride.
“You really made it to the National Parks, huh? That was your dream since freshman year…” Ford says though immediately regrets it as you stare back at him in surprise. “Yeah.. I did. No one really knew about that.. Not even Fiddleford.” You reply, running your thumb over the print on the mug bashfully. “Well, um... I’m really happy for you. I know you must have worked hard to get there.” Ford offers, not sure how else to respond.
You smile warmly, taking a sip from your coffee, “Thanks, I appreciate it. It means a lot coming from someone with 12 PhDs.” You tease at the end to which Ford’s cheeks redden in embarrassment and flattery.
Mabel hops up on the counter next to her Grunkle Stan who mutters under his breath, “Smooth move, kid.” 
You turn to look back at Mabel, “Any more questions for me?” 
Mabel taps her chin, deep in thought. Her eyes flicker over to great-uncle Ford who continues to stare at you in admiration. She snaps her fingers, putting her match-making skills to use once again, “What would you say is your type in a partner?”
“Mabel! What kinda question is that?” Dipper groans, shoveling a spoonful of cereal into his mouth.
“Wow, we’re getting to the real hard-hitting questions.” You say in amusement, slightly caught off guard but amused. You ponder the answer yourself, wondering if the kids would understand what you mean by this.
“Well, does your generation know what a silver fox is?” You ask with a sheepish grin and a flush to your cheeks, rubbing the back of your neck.
Your answer causes a chain reaction of different responses.
Mabel squeals with an eager nod, looking over hopefully at her Grunkle Ford.
Dipper and Stan both end up spitting out their milk and coffee respectively.
Ford sits at the table, blinking in confusion.
“What’s a silver fox? Is that a new type of species?”
-
After cleaning up the mess that Stan and Dipper had made, you finally start getting ready to head out with Ford to visit your old friend. You stand in front of the bathroom mirror, fixing your outfit before reaching to grab the hairbrush Mabel graciously lets you borrow after you realize that you had forgotten yours in the car.
Stan walks down the stairs, having changed out of his white tank-top and pajama pants into clothes more suitable for going out. He pauses at the open bathroom door, leaning against the door frame, “Hey, while you and Poindexter catch up with McGucket, I’m gonna swing into town later tonight to get you a replacement battery for your car.”
Placing the brush down, you address Stan, “You sure? I can always ask Ford if we could stop by the auto shop on the way back to pick it up.”
Stan scoffs, “Please, my brother’s smart and knows a ton about science-y stuff but he’s hopeless when it comes to cars. Besides, I know a guy, I’ll get you a discount.”
“Alright.. Just let me know how much I owe you, I’m for sure paying you back.” You say hesitantly as you make your way towards the door. Stan steps aside to let you through, “Yeah, yeah,” he says dismissively.
Technically, that guy was Bud Gleeful and that discount was five-fingered but you didn’t have to know that.
“You found your way around the Mystery Shack pretty easily, by the way. Didn’t even have to show you where the bathroom was, I sometimes have a hard time finding it and I’ve lived here for over 30 years.” Stan comments. You realize that even this morning, you walked directly to the kitchen, almost like your feet knew where to go through pure muscle memory.
“Are you ready, Y/N?” Ford’s deep voice calls out, walking down the hallway to approach you and Stan. 
“Yeah, as ready as I’ll ever be, I guess.” You say, slightly nervous to see Fiddleford again. What if he didn’t want to see you? What if he didn’t even remember you just like you couldn’t remember Ford?
Ford could see the furrow in your brow, a sign he had picked up through the years you had been together that you were overthinking. He hesitates for a second but places a hand on your arm, snapping you out of your rumination. “He’ll be elated to see you, Y/N. Though to give you a fair warning, he looks a lot different than how he did during our college days.” He says reassuringly.
You nod, smiling up at him, your nerves calmed down for now. “Thanks, Ford. I’m gonna go grab my bag and I’ll meet you outside.” You make your way back down the hallway, leaving the twins by themselves.
“Think she might already be starting to getting some of her memories back just by being here…” Stan muttered, following his brother outside. Ford’s eyebrow raises in confusion, “What makes you say that, Stanley?”
“She knows how to get around the house without even thinking about it. I know I gave her a tour but that was just the showroom and the gift shop.” Stan shares his observation, holding the door open for Ford as they step out into the front yard where Stan’s car is parked.
“Fascinating… maybe her memories may come back more organically than we had thought.” Ford muses before placing his hand out, “The keys, Stanley?”
Stan sighs, rummaging through his jacket before placing his keys in his brother’s hand, “You know I could have just driven you two up to the mansion but someone insisted I give you two alone time to bond.”
Ford squeezes the keys in his hand before smiling at his brother, “I should probably say thank you to Mabel then… and thanks Stanley for bringing her here.”
Stan punches his twin in the arm affectionately, “Whatever, I just better not see a scratch on El Diablo when you two get back.” Ford winces but grins, rubbing the spot on his arm.
Right on cue, you close the creaky door behind you, bag slung over your shoulder as you walk over to the pair, “Alright, I’m ready to go! Sorry, Mabel stopped me on the way out to ask my opinion on what sweater she should wear to the roller rink. Apparently, none of you guys have the taste to give her a valid opinion.” You chuckle.
“Roller rink? I swear these kids turn thirteen and think they can just go around without telling their Grunkle where they’re going.” Stan sighs in exasperation, calling out Mabel’s name as he walks back inside. You follow Ford to the car, sliding into the passenger side. “Sorry if my driving is a bit rusty, Stanley’s usually the one that drives us around when we’re in Oregon for the summer.” Ford apologizes in advance, pulling out of Mystery Shack and onto the open road.
“I mean as long we come out unscathed, I’m not complaining.” You say nonchalantly, taking in the sight of the massive trees that tower over the two way road in front of you. 
The two of you sit in silence for a bit, neither one of you knowing how to spark conversation. There lingered an unspoken heaviness, mostly due in part the intensity of your exchange the previous night. Ford desperately wanted to talk to you and yet he was drawing a blank on what to even talk about. 
As you make your way up the winding hills, Ford finally speaks up, deciding to ask you more about your work, “So you work for the National Parks? Are you a research scientist or did you go the natural resource conservation route?” He asks, remembering how you were torn between pursuing further research or honing in on your love of preserving nature.
“You’re pretty well-informed about the geoscience field. I just tell most people I look at rocks all day.” You admit, toying with the necklace that you had tucked into your shirt, “I started off in research but I realized that most of my time was spent in labs and studying specimens rather than actually out in the field. I love the parks so much, I was itching to get back out there so I switched to conservation.” 
“Makes sense, just studying concepts and theories in a controlled environment isn’t nearly as fun as getting hands-on experience.” Ford chuckles. His eyes flick over to see your fingers rolling around the vibrant orange gemstone attached to your necklace, almost choking on his spit. Your eyes meet his and your eyebrow raises as Ford’s expression is like he’s seen a ghost.
“You okay? Do I have something on my face?” You question, pulling down the sun visor to check your appearance in the mirror. Ford shakes his head vigorously, clearing his throat, “No… I… do you remember where you got that necklace?”
You pause at his query, putting the sun visor back into its original position and glancing down at the sunstone that dangles from the simple gold chain. “Oh this? I honestly don’t remember, I’ve had it for quite some time. Why do you ask?”
Ford takes a deep breath before looking back onto the road, “I… well… gave it to you. We drove up here from Backupsmore to start my grant research. Along the way, we stopped near one of the parks and you found that piece of sunstone. You carried it around everywhere so one night, I took the time to fashion it into a necklace so you’d never lose it.” 
There’s a pause before you speak. That pause felt like eternity to Ford.
“You know…I think you were in my dream last night...” You say, staring at the necklace with a newfound understanding. “I was back at Backupsmore and walking to the library. I ended up walking up to someone with their head buried in the books and I called out your name but I woke up after that.”
Ford was not expecting that response, looking over at you in alarm, “This may be a stretch but was there indication in your dream that it was fall?” You nod slowly.
“That was the first time we met. You were struggling with the section on seismic refractions in a physics course that I had taken a semester prior. Our professor recommended me as a tutor.” Ford recounts, his fingers gripping the wheel slightly tighter.
“Jeez… could all my dreams… just be memories?” You mutter to yourself but loud enough for Ford to hear it. “You’ve had other dreams….?” Ford questioned, his mind reeling with this discovery. “Yeah, I’ve had them for years. There’s always someone else in them… but before I can figure out or discern who it might be, my body wakes up.” You admit, rifling through your bag before pulling out a small leather bound journal.
“This is a bit embarrassing to admit but I’ve been keeping track of them here.” You say hesitantly as you hold up the leather bound journal. Ford stared between you and the journal in awe. He had always found preparation attractive and he thinks he may have fallen in love with you all over again.
“Perhaps we can go through some of them and see if it correlates to any memories I have.” Ford attempts to say with a steady voice but there’s a hint of excitement in his proposition. “I honestly would love that… I feel like I’ve been trying to crack the code of these dreams without any key.” You reply eagerly.
Ford makes the final turn up the hill, approaching the massive gates to what was formerly the Northwest Manor. Your eyes widen, staring at the impressive estate before you. You watch as Ford presses on the intercom, “Fiddleford, we’re here.” before the gates open to let you in.
“This.. is where Fiddleford lives? Did he make a breakthrough with his personal computers or something?” You question to which Ford chuckles nervously. “You could say that. Honestly, it’s quite a long story that we can talk about inside.” After parking the car in front of the fountain, Ford gets out of the car before opening the door for you.
You two make your way to the wooden front door, which bursts open soon after Ford raps his knuckles against it. You’re greeted by your friend, who looks considerably older despite being the same age as you and Stanford that you almost didn’t recognize him. Fiddleford embraces Ford first before stepping back to assess you. You gulp, anxiety filling up your system once again.
You’re quickly enveloped into a tight hug by Fiddleford, which you return. “My god, Fiddleford, it’s been too long. I thought you disappeared off the face of the Earth.” You said shakily. You two pull apart as Fiddleford grasps your arms, “Sweet sarsaparilla, look at you, Y/N! You make me and Ford look like old geezers! I’m real sorry I hadn’t reached out until now…”
“There’s no need to apologize, Fiddleford… I’m just glad we reconnected.” You say, a wave of nostalgia hitting you. “Come on in, you two! We got a lot of catching up to do!” Fiddleford says, ushering you into the massive home with his arm before closing the door.
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beloveds-embrace · 10 hours ago
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More fairy reader pretty please!!!
Fairy reader post
Enjoy!! :D
In the end, your wings make the decision for you; still far too weak to properly and safely fly for long-term, you stay with them and thus with the passage of days, you become a fixture of the cottage. The four men adjusted seamlessly, weaving you into their routines. Mornings began with the quiet bustle of preparing tea, coffee, and breakfast. Johnny always saved you a few sweet crumbs from the food they’d made, setting them on a tiny dish for specifically bought just for you with an exaggerated wink. “Here you go, wee lass, breakfast for you too.” he’d say, making you giggle.
You grew more comfortable exploring the cottage, gliding from shelf to table with wings that were growing stronger every day, and thus brighter. They marveled at the subtle sparkles of light trailing behind you. It was as if tiny stars followed your every move. Simon, for all his quiet observation, had taken to leaving out curious objects- a shiny coin, a small piercing- just to watch your eyes light up with interest at seeing the shiny, human trinkets you’d normally not find in your routes in the forest. Coins especially were your favorite; you’d make the happpiest squeaks whenever you’d find one.
One rainy afternoon, as droplets drummed against the windows, you perched on the edge of a mug, watching Kyle and John play a game of cards. Their banter was familiar and comforting by now, a low murmur that mingled with the crackling of the fireplace you steered yourself a safe distance away from. When John noticed your intent gaze, he grinned. “Want to play, little one?”
You nodded eagerly. He handed you a card with great care, its weight surprisingly manageable. Determined, you mimicked their expressions of deep thought despite not really, fully understanding what was so special about these cards or how the game was played, earning a soft, rumbling laugh from John. “She’s got a poker face better than yours, Gaz. Might give you a run for your money.”
As weeks turned to months, your presence transformed their quiet lives and you remained, even once your wings were fully healed. No longer were you just a guest; you were family. Together, you then showed them the forest, and all the hidden nooks and crannies that made for perfect places to rest and have a picnic there. Sometimes, you’d catch lights flickering within the depth of the forest but yet… you didn’t want to return to your kin.
One evening, as the sky blushed with a beautiful, reddish sunset, you sat on the windowsill, watching the woods. Simon stood nearby, still and thoughtful. “You could leave, you know,” he murmured, voice soft, almost hesitant yet too curious to stop. “If you wanted.”
You turned to him, youe wings lazily around your body instead of your usual mini-blanket. “I know,” you whispered, your glow flaring gently. “But I… don’t want to.”
His head dipped in a nod, and though he said nothing more, you could feel the relief in the air. You leaned back and dropped the blanket, flying up to curl in his palms, and felt a warmth bloom deep inside you. Here, you’d found a place to rest your wings—and you were happy to stay.
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monzabee · 1 year ago
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the name game – cl16
masterlist
Summary: The one where you and Charles try to get through one of the first hardships of parenthood.
Pairing: charles leclerc x reader
Word Count: 2.8k
Warnings: pregnancy (and pregnancy symptoms), crying, angst but also tooth rotting fluff
Request: “Can I request Charles and his girlfriend or fiancé having a baby? And they are talking about names and she suggest her ex boyfriends name to piss him off and he gets really upset and mad. And they then tlak about last names and she tells him she wants their baby to have her name and he is not happy about that or hyphenating as he feels strongly about his family name” 
Author’s Note: hi, hey, hello!! i’m so happy to be back after a month of exams, and what better way to kick it off with a charles fic?? the whole concept was extremely cute and i loved it so much, but i kind of wanted there to be a chaotic aspect to it?? thank you anon for your request, and i hope you guys enjoy this one! good morning, noon or night wherever you are, xoxobee
Please also note that all of my works are protected under copyright, and not available for reposting on other platforms. 
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Some people keep saying that the hardest part of pregnancy is the first trimester, some say that the hardest part is actually giving birth because, well – it’s quite literally pushing a baby from right there. But to you, the hardest part is not the nausea, or the possible pain of giving birth, or the sleepless nights to come, no. To you, the hardest part is deciding on what to name your baby. Everyone around you seems to have an opinion on what to name the baby, of course, and with the increasing amount of (sometimes uncalled) suggestions coming from you from all around, you and Charles find yourselves in the middle of a never ending game of name the baby.
“Alfred?” Charles suggests, raising his head from his phone.
The suggestion gets a groan, you shake your head to let him know that it’s definitely not the name. “Excuse me, are we about to raise Batman’s butler?”
“Good point,” he nods his head, “we are Marvel people anyway.”
“You guys are useless at this, you know that right?” Arthur scoffs, raising an eyebrow at the two of you. “Why don’t you wait until the baby is actually born? Many people say that it’s easier to name a baby that way.”
“And how do you know these people?” Charles asks, eyes narrowing at the edges.
Arthur raises his hands on the either side of his face in mock surrender. “Touché.” He takes a moment to think, “Why do you only looking at boy’s names? I thought you didn’t want to learn the gender until the birth.”
“We don’t,” you affirm, slowly perching yourself on the barstool next to Charles, “Charles just thinks that it’s going to be a boy.”
Arthur watches as his older brother nods while smiling proudly, then shares a look with you which screams, He knows there’s a fifty-percent chance, right? You shake your head as you shrug, turning your attention back to your phone. “Oh, oh! What about Luka?”
“Luka,” Charles repeats, and tests the name coming out of his lips, “Luka Leclerc?” His watches as you give him a bright smile as you nod repeatedly.
“It does have a nice ring to it,” Arthur comments from his place on the couch as he abandons the book filled with baby names in his hands.
“Luka.” Charles repeats the name again, but as he looks into your expectant eyes, he can feel a nudging at the back of his mind. Luka, Luka, Luka – has he met someone with the same name before? Well, probably, he thinks. He does meet a lot of people during his day to day life, not to mention the race weekends. He decides to let go of the worry, establishing in his mind that he probably met a fan with the same name– “No, chérie! We can’t use Luka!”
“What?” You ask him with a small pout on your lips, “Why not?”
“You dated a guy named Luka, remember?” He reminds you, expecting you to catch onto what he’s saying. “Chérie, it was right before we dated!” You look at him in confusion as you try to piece what he’s saying together, but Charles just looks at you in disbelief, “I can’t believe you want to name our baby after a guy you dated!”
“But–” You start, eyebrows furrowing together as you try and make yourself remember. “That can’t be true.”
“I’m telling you,” Charles turns to Arthur, raises his eyebrows as he looks at his brother for support, “Arthur tell her that I’m correct.”
Arthur chooses to throw him the pillow he takes from behind him. “How should I know the guy she dated before you, you idiot?”
“Would it kill you to be on my side for a change?” Charles deadpans.
You tune out the rest of their argument, still trying to remember whether Charles is actually correct or not – the pregnancy hormones definitely not helping you on your case. “Wait!” You exclaim, making both of the brothers to turn towards you. “I never dated a guy named Luka,” you raise a finger towards Charles to shut him up before he even gets a chance to speak, “let me rephrase that. I never dated a guy named Luka, because the last guy I went on a date with before we got together was Lucas.”
Charles’ voice is tentative as he asks “Lucas?”
“Yes, you idiot.” You roll your eyes at him, “Why would I try to name our baby after a guy I went on one date with?”
Arthur nods in support of you, “You have to admit you overreacted, Charles.”
“Okay, you? You zip it.” Charles snaps at his brother and then turns to you. “I’m sorry, chérie, but I thought it was Luka.”
“Well it wasn’t,” you cross your arms over your chest, “and don’t tell your brother to zip it, he’s right!” You let out a chuckle as you share a look with Arthur as Charles watches the both of you let out chuckles at his expense.
He lets his eyes narrow and he silently watches as the two of you make fun of him for his outburst. He only talks when your laughter is dying down, “Are you guys done?”
“Oh come on, darling, it was cute.” You lean towards him to link your fingers between his.
He raises one of his eyebrows as he asks, “So you wouldn’t react the same way if I just did that?”
“Oh, Charles, don’t–” Arthur warns him, but you quickly stop him.
“No, no,” you bite back a smile, “continue, my love.”
“As I was saying,” Charles gives his brother a pointed look and then turns his attention back to you, “you wouldn’t react the same way if I wanted to name our future child ‘Charlotte’?”
“Excuse me?” You stutter, frowning as your expression turns into a pout. You wait for a moment for Charles to realise what he’s just said, but when he fails to do so, you prompt him by asking, “How is that similar to what just happened? And why would you bring her into this in the first place?”
Charles shakes his head in disbelief, “How is it not?”
Arthur gets up from his place on the couch and pretends to yawn as he stretches his arms over his head, “You know what, I’m feeling kinda tired maybe I should go home.”
“You sit right back down on that couch, Arthur Leclerc.” You point a finger at him despite having your attention solely focused on your fiancé sitting in front of you, and not on the poor boy who tried to get away from the inevitable fight you and Charles are going to get into.
He lets himself fall back on the couch as he groans and presses a pillow over his face as he mumbles, “Here we go again.”
“I hope you know that these two situations are not similar to each other – like at all.” You emphasise for Charles, “I can’t believe you would even say that!”
There is a clear look of bewilderment in Charles’ eyes as he asks, “You dated ‘Lucas’, I dated Charlotte, how is it not the same?”
“I went on one date with the guy, didn’t date him for three whole years, that’s not the same, you idiot!” You exclaim as you quickly press your hand against your chest as you glare at Charles. “I can’t believe you couldn’t see that, God, Charles! You do this, you always do this!”
Maybe under different circumstances, Charles would have acted a bit smarter. He is, after all, a smart man, he prides himself of being one, but being the absolutely stupid man he is, he asks, “Do what?”
Arthur turns back from the couch, almost breaking his back in the process as his eyes widen in shock as well as he gives his brother a look which screams, How more stupid can you be, you dumbass? In an attempt to diffuse the tension, which is building between the two of you, he recommends, “How about we focus something other than the baby’s name, like the theme of the nursery?”
 “Fairy tales,” you answer at the same time Charles chimes, “Racing cars.”
“Okay I take that back.” Arthur mumbles as he watches you and Charles throw glares at each other. “Let’s just stop talking about the baby? It’s clear that the two of you are set on having all the fights you didn’t have before deciding to have a baby.”
Charles lets out a supportive sound. “We clearly suck at discussion right now, this is starting to turn into the argument we had about you taking my surname.”
“Are- are you serious right now?” You stutter once again, eyes widened with surprise. “You are so obstinate, Charles! You refuse to see the right when you’re in the wrong and you refuse to compromise!” You voice is coming more of as a groan now that he’s opened that door. “We didn’t need to have that argument, because i’ve been telling you that I am hyphenating my surname.”
He lets out a similar groan, as he tries to reason, “I just don’t understand why–”
“So our children can have your name, but they can’t have mine?” You raise an eyebrow in warning, eyes narrowing on the edges as you look at your fiancé with suspicion.
“No,” he retorts, trying to defend himself, “I never said I didn’t want the baby, or our future children, to have your surname, I said I just wanted them to have mine.”
You let out a humourless laugh at his reasoning, “So I’m just supposed to lose a big part of myself when we get married, is that it?”
Charles immediately feels a wave of guilt wash over him as he realizes the impact of his words. He jumps up from his seat and rushes over to you, kneeling down in front of you as he gently takes your hands in his. “Well, no– I didn’t mean it like that–”
“I think I know what you’ve meant, Charles.” You voice is shaky as you mumble the next words, “Can you just help me get up, please?”
“What?” Charles asks, motioning his brother to stand back. “Why?”
“Because I can’t stand up on my own, I’m six-months pregnant!” You exclaim, the tears finally start falling down your cheeks. “And it’s all because of you!”
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In hindsight, Charles should’ve foreseen the way his words would cause such a commotion in your relationship – given the fact that the two of you have talked about it before. As the weight of his insensitivity settles in, a new wave of panic washes over Charles – he just couldn't shake the thought that his thoughtless words might push you away. And he knows he should’ve listened to Arthur’s warnings before, and probably should have used better words to express his feelings instead of saying things he didn’t mean in the first place; but then again, he’s never been too good at it in the first place. After receiving a very lengthy lecture from Arthur what to say, or rather what not to say, to a hormonal pregnant woman, he left the apartment the two of you share in a hurry to find you. Despite the logical side of his brain constantly remind him of the fact that you know the city well enough to not get lost, the nagging voice at the back of his mind reminded him of the worst things that could have happened both to the love his life and his baby. So imagine his frustration when you don’t answer any of his calls as he frantically rides around the city in hopes of finding you and apologising like he should’ve before you got out of the door.
After dialling your number for the umpteenth time that night, he releases a relaxed breath when you finally answer his call. “Mon amour, I am so sorry, I didn’t mean–”
“Charles?” He hears your voice play through the car play speakers, “Oh, Charles, I did something bad.”
“Y/N.” Charles can swear his heart stops for a moment, he pulls the car over quickly to give you his undivided attention. “Talk to me, love, what’s wrong? Where are you?”
“I didn’t mean to do it, it was an accident–”
“Chérie, please tell me what happened.” He pleads, hands gripping the steering wheel tighter with anxiety. “Where are you? I’ll come to get you.”
He hears you take a shaky breath as you mumble your next words, “I accidentally ordered both raspberry and lemon ice cream, and I can’t finish both.”
“I- darling,” Charles lets out another relieved breath, “I’m coming to get you now, okay? Just wait for me.”
Your voice is sheepish as you mumble, but the small sniffle Charles hears through the speakers is enough to make his heart clench. “Okay, can you please bring me my blanket?”
“Of course I will, just stay there okay?” He mumbles as he starts up the car again, “I love you.”
“Thank you, darling, I love you too.”
Some of the anxiety he has been feeling about your brief disappearance ease with the enlightment as Charles begins to drive towards the small ice cream parlour near your apartment. Of course, you were right around the corner when he was looking for you throughout the entire city; and of course, he should have known you’d crave ice cream after eight o’clock. Thankfully, it doesn’t take him long to get to you, and he remembers to grab the blanked you keep in the car for when you get cold during night drive the two of you go on frequently.
He finds you sitting at one of the tables right near the door, sitting by yourself as you eye the cup in front of you with a small pout on your face. “Chérie.”
“Charles.” You mumble, meeting his eyes as you exhale a deep breath. “You found me.”
“Well to be fair, love, you’re right around the corner from our home.” He drapes the blanked across your shoulders before settling next to you. A small smile forms of his face when you push the small cup towards him. “You got lemon ice cream?”
You sigh sadly as you wrap the blanket around you tighter, “I couldn’t get far because the baby wouldn’t let me, and she wanted ice cream – and it’s habit, Leclerc.” You scowl at him, quickly adding, “I’m still mad at you.” You let out a frustrated groan when you find him smirking covertly, “What?”
“You called the baby a ‘she’.” He points out, grabbing the spoon and getting some of the ice cream on his spoon, “You think it’s going to be a girl.”
“I- I- no!” You gasp as you watch him bring the spoon to his mount and gives you a dimpled smile, “You stop that right now, Charles Marc Hervé Perceval Leclerc!” You reach over to hit his arm lightly, “I’m still very much mad at you.”
“I know,” he responds grimly, “we have to talk about what happened.” He laces his fingers against yours as he takes your hand on his arm in his, “I didn’t mean anything I said, I am so sorry.”
You let out a deep sigh, eyes softening around the edges, “I need you to understand that I don’t want to lose a part of myself just because we are getting married and starting a family, Charles.” You shake your head lightly as you give him a sad smile, “Do you know how it makes me feel when you say that you want our children to have only your surname?”
“I do.” Charles replies, but after receiving the look from you, he adds, “I mean – I do, now.”
“Charles,” you begin, “I love you, and I love that we get to go on this journey together, but I am not giving up my name. And I want our children to have both of our names.”
“I’m sorry, chérie, I don’t know why I said that.” Charles looks at you with a sad look.
“Your feelings are important to me,” you tell him, “I need you to know that.”
His eyes widen in surprise, “I know that, oh God. I do know that, Y/N.” He presses a small kiss to your conjoined hands, “And you have to admit, love, Y/N-Leclerc sounds great.”
“Thank you,” you let out breathily, eyes brimming with tears, “I love you.”
“I love you too, chérie.” Charles’ smile turns into a mischievous one, “So you think the baby is going to be a girl?”
“Shut up, Perceval.” You bite back a smile as you bring your hands on your belly, “I just hope she has your dimples and not your anger threshold.”
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wlntrsldler · 8 months ago
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i. busy streets and busy lives, and all we know is touch and go. | luke castellan | state of grace
fourteen-year-old luke castellan develops a crush on the pretty girl who shows him a type of kindness he'd never experienced before.
athena!reader x luke castellan. not canon compliant, no betrayal. happy ending luke :)
series masterlist | previous | next
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fourteen-year-old luke castellan was apprehensive to let go of annabeth’s hand. the small girl just healed from her injuries following their arrival to camp. she showed no sign that she was physically not okay, but luke could still feel her shaking. they’d both just lost thalia, a companion, a friend, who they faced the scariest things with, far greater than any of their imaginations could conjure up combined. luke didn’t think it was a good idea for her to be sent off to cabin 6 just yet, away from him. 
“s’kay, luke,” annabeth tugged on his hand. he looked down at her, finding no trace of nervousness on her features. instead, she had an eager smile on her face as mr. d and chiron waited for her to walk across the stone path to meet her siblings. “i’m not going far.” 
oh, luke realized. he was the one shaking. 
he put on his brave face, telling himself that he had to be strong for his sister, but he knew deep down, he probably needed annabeth more than she needed him. the girl looked excited to be with her real siblings, and luke was being selfish keeping her away from them. he’d just lost so much already; his childhood, his sanity, at one point, his mom, thalia, and letting go of beth’s hand felt like he was giving up. he just needed something to live for, something bigger than his survival. 
luke crouched down to get eye-level with her, smiling softly, “if you need anything, i’m just a few doors down, ‘kay? whatever you need, little beth.” 
“i know,” she giggled, innocence in her eyes. she didn’t quite understand why her brother was being dramatic about it. they were safe now. 
luke ruffled her hair, making her squeal, before getting up. he gave a courteous nod to chiron and mr. d, taking hold of beth’s hand again as he walked towards the two children of athena waiting across the way. 
luke didn’t miss the way annabeth’s eyes sparkled at the buildings around her. she pointed out the intricacies of the columns lining the exteriors of some of the cabins, marveling at the vines that engulfed the walls of cabin 4. luke wondered if he was ever this small, if he ever found the beauty in the small things the same way that annebeth did. perhaps, in memories that are lost and locked away in the back of his mind, he used to be like her. 
annabeth looked happy here, safe. luke let out a breath of relief that he didn’t know he was holding in. he’d given up on a life other than survival a long time ago. since he was nine, he’d been running from everything all on his own. then he met thalia and he didn’t feel so alone anymore. and meeting annabeth, well, he found a new reason to keep going after that. she was too young to have experienced all of this. if he couldn’t protect his own innocence, maybe he could protect hers as much as he possibly could. 
“you must be annabeth,” you smiled at her, crouching down to her height the same way luke just did. “i’m y/n. i’m so glad to have a new sister.” 
“yeah, i’m annabeth. nice to meet you,” annabeth removed her hand from luke’s grasp, reaching over to shake your hand. your eyebrows raised in surprise, pleased at her manners, and accepted her handshake. she pointed at luke, “this is my brother, luke.” 
the boy beside you, holding a clipboard, furrowed his eyebrows. he flipped through the notes he had on his board, “i was told there was only one child of athena.” 
“yeah, no, i- i’m a child of hermes,” luke shook his head, the name of his father tasted bitter on his tongue. he rubbed the back of his neck with his hand, “she just means it like metaphorically? is that the word? we-we’re not actually related.” 
you stood up, eyes darting between him and beth. luke’s eyes met yours and he couldn’t help but flush under your stare. he’d seen pretty girls before; in line at a grocery store while he stuffed his pockets with stolen twinkies and chips, in the mall where he’d sit at sometimes to get away from the harsh weather outside, even on his way to see chiron and mr. d when he got a glimpse of aphrodite’s daughters, but he’d never seen anyone like you before. 
you had a commanding presence about you, like you had the answers to everyone’s questions and knew what was best for everyone, but it wasn’t intimidating at all. one look at you and luke knew you were a leader, one that led with grace and empathy and blessed with a face of an angel. you had soft features, kind eyes, high cheeks like you didn’t go a day without smiling, and hair that framed your face perfectly. he wouldn’t be surprised if people didn’t hesitate to follow you to the ends of the world if you asked them to. he was about ready to do that and he’d only just met you. 
you grinned at him, the crinkles by your eyes appearing, “but she’s your sister.” 
the smile that he returned to you was effortless. he glanced down at annabeth, nudging her, “but she’s my sister. annoying, but my sister, nonetheless.” 
“hey!” 
you and luke laughed at her harmless protest, sharing a look with each other that nobody else caught. the boy next to you, who unenthusiastically introduced himself as oliver, tucked his clipboard under his arm and motioned for all of you to start walking to the cabin. 
“luke,” oliver said, stopping his tracks, “we can take it from here. i’m sure you want to get some rest in your cabin after the 48 hours you just had.” 
luke wanted to say no. he didn’t want to leave annabeth yet. he would rather sit through long, droning minutes of learning about athena’s cabin, though he had no use for it since he won’t be living there, than retreat to the hermes cabin. but he also didn’t want to seem weak, clinging onto a seven-year-old girl when he should be perfectly fine on his own. annabeth said so herself, she wasn’t going far. 
you lived up to your angel-like demeanor when you spoke for him. you noticed the flash of panic in his eyes as he took in oliver’s words. you cleared your throat, “rest is for losers, oli. plus, the more the merrier. i say luke should come with us.” 
oliver huffed, but nodded, continuing his steps to cabin 6. you fell into a rhythm with him, conversing about camp activities that luke wasn’t too familiar with yet. annabeth trudged happily beside him, silent as she stared out into the view of camp. luke had to pull her by her shirt to stop her from running into things, her excitement getting the best of her. 
as oliver began his rant about some ares kid, you turned your head to sneak a glance at him and annabeth. luke felt his chest tighten when you smiled at him, all teeth and sunshine, before returning to your conversation with your brother. 
annabeth tapped luke’s hip, “i like her.” 
luke couldn’t hide the smile on his face as he looked down at her. his cheeks hurt from smiling so much, “me too.” 
luke wished he could say that the rest of his introduction to camp half-blood was as pleasant and nice as his interaction with you, but the rowdy cabin he was met with after he left annabeth in cabin 6 was something that he was not prepared for. unlike the athena cabin, where things were neat and put together, scrolls and books lining the walls, the hermes cabin was a mess. 
there were clothes thrown everywhere, makeshift beds in every corner of the cabin, and dozens of kids, claimed and unclaimed, running around. luke wanted to punch oliver across his face because how on earth was he supposed to get some “rest” with all of this going on? 
luke sighed, adjusting the bag on his shoulder as he searched for an empty bed. much to his dismay, the only bed available was the one right next to the entrance. he tried not to think about how little sleep he’d be getting with the door slamming open and shut with how many kids seemed to live in this place.
luke rolled his eyes, watching his siblings jump on the beds as they chased each other. none of them seemed to notice that he arrived, that he was new, but he learned from you earlier that too many half-bloods came and went in the hermes cabin. they were probably used to seeing unfamiliar faces and didn’t bother to introduce themselves anymore. 
with a silent groan, luke lay on his bed, trying to drown out the noise of laughter by pushing his thin pillow against his ears. the noise wasn’t unwelcomed, per se, but it was just foreign to him. he’d spent countless nights falling asleep to the sound of coos from animals in the woods and the sound of hushed echoes in the caves he called home. he’d slept through the roaring of the train tracks by his head and the sound of city noise outside his window when he managed to sneak into an empty motel room. he’d slept through the feeling of imminent danger, but never this. he doesn’t remember the last time he slept to the sounds of children laughing. 
he probably got a few minutes of rest before the cabin door swung open. the children quickly quieted down, which made luke get up from his position on his bed, ready to thank whoever it was that got his siblings to calm down. of course, luke wasn’t surprised when you were standing at the door, arms crossed over your chest. 
“come on, guys,” you tutted, shaking your head. “can’t you see someone is trying to rest? luke is new here and you’re not making a good first impression.” 
mumbles of apologies rang through the cabin before they all scurried out the door, all blushing in embarrassment as you sent them a look of faux disappointment. you walked over to luke, stopping at the foot of his bed. he sat up straighter, rubbing the tiredness out of his eyes. 
“sorry about them,” you grimaced, “they have too much energy for their own good sometimes, but you’ll grow to love them. i swear it.”
“yeah, they’re cute.” 
you couldn’t help but snort at the sarcasm in his voice. you motioned for the seat beside him on his bed and luke moved over to give you more space. you were so close to him that he could feel the heat of your skin radiating off you. “i take it your first day hasn’t been the best?” 
“it’s been… okay,” he trailed off, suddenly self-conscious. his curls were a mess on his head and he’s sure the pillow he had against his face left an imprint. “just a lot to take in, i guess.” 
“i get that,” you said, taking off your shoes to sit criss-cross on his bed. luke thought the cartoon owls on your socks were charming. “i remember my first day here and how chaotic it was. i would love to tell you that it stops being like that after a while, but i’d be lying and i don’t want to start off our relationship on a lie.”
luke knew that what you meant by “relationship” was platonic, with no romantic connotations, but he was a teenage boy developing a hopeless crush on a pretty girl, way out of his league, so so sue him for how his heartbeat increased ten-fold at the word.
he tugged on the neckline of his shirt, “do they always listen to you like this?” 
“i don’t know if “listen” is the right word,” you chuckled, tucking a piece of hair behind your ear. “i’ve been here a while, so all the kids know me. i dunno, if i had to guess, i’d say they’re just used to me.” 
luke hummed. you were being modest. it was clear that all the kids liked you. on the way to the athena cabin, multiple campers greeted you as you passed by, completely ignoring oliver who was beside you and him and annabeth who were trailing not far behind. you had to make so many stops to engage in small conversations with the people you ran into, younger and older kids alike. he was shocked at how you remembered everyone’s names. he lost track after the third kid. 
luke’s stomach growled in hunger and he couldn’t even play it off because it was silent in the cabin. he shut his eyes, embarrassed, as he looked away from you, clutching his stomach, begging his body to be his friend for once. 
“perfect timing, luke,” you showed no sign of being affected by his embarrassment. you slipped your feet into your sneakers. luke noticed you tied the laces of your shoes loosely, making it easier to take them on and off. “lunch is in five minutes so we better get going. when the ares kids get there first, they massacre the food before any of us gets the chance to put anything on our plate. all that training makes them hungry.” 
luke followed you out the door as you explained the structure and schedule of camp half-blood. he was only half paying attention to you because he was too busy listening to the sound of your voice and watching your face light up when you talked about something you found particularly cool. 
as you approached the line for food, thankfully before the ares kids, you handed luke a tray. he began to scoop up some food, before turning to look at you, “don’t take this the wrong way, but shouldn’t the hermes head counselor be showing me around? not that i’m not enjoying this tour you’re giving me, but i figured each head counselor for each cabin would be doing this for their new siblings.” 
“typically, yeah,” you shrugged, “i’m not even the head counselor of cabin 6 yet.” 
luke’s eyebrows raised, “you’re not?”
“nope,” you replied, leading him over to an empty table. he sat across from you, waiting for you to continue. “oli is, but he’s leaving after this year. he got accepted to MIT. i’ll be taking over for him when he leaves.” 
“that’s cool,” luke nodded, taking a bite out of the chili mac on his plate. “who’s the head counselor for the hermes cabin?” 
a frown appeared on your face as you looked down at your plate. you used your fork to push around your food, “lettie used to be.” 
luke knew that tone– grief. it was the same tone he used to tell two apollo kids to be quiet when he overheard them talking about thalia when he and annabeth were still in the infirmary. that tone meant that it was something that shouldn’t be discussed. he changed the subject, “how’s little beth settling in?” 
your usual smile returned to your face at the mention of annabeth. luke was glad it was back. “she’s great! she’s brilliant, which i expected, but she’s incredible. truly, luke, she fits right in.” 
pride bloomed in his chest. of course beth was already impressing people. she was too smart for her own good and sometimes luke had trouble keeping up with her. at least now she had her siblings to talk to. “she is great, isn’t she?” 
you nodded, “polite, too. can’t say the same about some of these kids.” 
as if on cue, two kids started bickering with each other, using colorful language that luke was sure they probably shouldn’t be using at their age. they continued to spew insults at each other before an older camper marched over to them and scolded them. the interaction ended in the two kids muttering insincere apologies to each other.
you motioned to the scene with your fork, “see what i mean?” 
luke laughed, bringing his attention back to you. “how long have you been here?” 
“three years,” you pulled out the necklace from under your shirt, showing off the beads on the string. “i got here when i was 11. grover was my protector, too.” 
“how was–” he cleared his throat, swallowing the last bits of chili mac he had in his mouth. he usually didn’t care about how messily he ate, but you were so put together that he figured he shouldn’t scarf down his food like a heathen in front of you. beth used to make fun of him because he inhaled his food so fast that she wondered if he even chewed. “how was your life before all of this?” 
“nothing special, really. my dad tried his best to raise me, but he didn’t really know what he was doing. a single dad raising a daughter on his own is hard enough, and adding that your kid is a demigod would surely have anyone raising a white flag.” luke nodded in understanding, too familiar with the pressures of that from what he could remember about his mom. you continued, “but life was good before camp half-blood, normal. i grew up in a small town in connecticut so there wasn’t much to do.” 
luke’s eyebrows raised in surprise, “where in connecticut? i grew up in westport.” 
your jaw dropped, eyes lighting up in glee. you dropped your fork on your tray, leaning over to grab his shoulders from across the table, “no way! i’m from south wilton!” 
the name sounded familiar. he recalls seeing the name on a road sign when he first left connecticut, but he couldn’t remember exactly where it was. a lot of the places he used to go to as a kid blurred together into one giant mush over the years, but with how excited you were to find out he was from westport, he figured you guys lived relatively close to each other. 
luke thought about it; a different life where he probably met you under a different circumstance. maybe you guys ended up at the same high school, both terrified little freshmen, hoping that the older kids would take it easy on you on your first day. or maybe you met earlier than that; perhaps luke was sent off to another middle school, no doubt after getting expelled because of his shenanigans like he always did, and you’d be a student there. there were so many other ways you could’ve met each other, but something in his heart told him that the ending would be the same. 
you’d still be the nice, pretty girl sitting in front of him at the lunch tables, showing him the ropes of life, showing him the type of kindness he never experienced before. though, he’d probably be eating the smushed pb & j sandwich that he forgot in the bottom of his book bag that his mom packed him for lunch instead of chili mac and you’d both be normal kids, excitedly talking about recess activities instead of swapping war stories about hellhounds and monsters. 
“what a small world,” you commented, sitting back down on your seat. luke missed the feeling of your hands on his shoulders. he liked how touchy you were. it was like your emotions were so intense that you had to grab onto someone to keep you grounded. you looked up to the roof, wondering, “i wonder how many times we almost met each other. south wilton is only ten minutes away from westport.”
“probably not many times,” luke replied, off-handedly. he wiped his greasy fingers on the napkin beside him. he didn’t know he still managed to get messy even though he tried his best to eat proper, but you didn’t seem to mind. “i didn’t really go out a lot, i don’t think. always had to stay home with my mom.” 
maybe it was because you were the daughter of athena and you were blessed with heightened emotional intelligence, but you sensed that there was something deeper to luke’s words that he seemed to not want to share. 
luke lived with the unfortunate ability to only remember the bad things that happened in his life. he attributes it to his knack for survival; if he remembers the things that could get him caught in a sticky situation, then he won’t put himself in that predicament again. dodging death left and right for five years meant that his brain was filled with a step-by-step guide on how not to die, which left little to no space for happy memories. the things that he does remember from his childhood were things like turning the stove off because his mom forgot she was in the middle of making dinner or remembering to close the window in the fall or else the house gets too cold because his mom forgot to pay the electric bill for the heater. 
not really the best memories to have of his childhood, but it taught him a lot. it kept him alive. 
“that’s okay,” you took a bite out of the strawberry on your tray, red juice slipping from the corner of your mouth. you wiped it away with your forearm, giving him a wide grin, “we met each other here so it doesn’t really matter, does it?” 
before he could answer, annabeth came racing to the table, out of breath. she was grinning like a fool, already talking luke’s ear off about how great the athena cabin was. luke pushed his tray away, turning to face the girl, nodding happily as she animatedly explained all the new things she’d learned. he couldn’t get a word in to respond because she kept talking and talking, but luke didn’t mind. 
he stole a glance at you as annabeth took a break to take a sip of water. you watched the two of them fondly, chin propped up on your hand, listening to the girl’s stories as if you weren’t there when it all happened. 
he thought of your question. no, he decided, it doesn’t really matter. he was here with you now.
540 notes · View notes
starkwlkr · 3 months ago
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Hey cutie patootie!! 💗 can you please do SFW alphabet for Wolverine???🥹🥹🥹🥹🥹🥹
wolverine sfw alphabet
an: this is my first time doing the sfw alphabet so if it’s bad so sorry!!
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A = Affection (How affectionate are they? How do they show affection?)
PDA? Not so much but he’ll sneak in kisses every now and then but privately? This man worships the ground you walk on of course he’s gonna make you feel loved
B = Best friend (What would they be like as a best friend? How would the friendship start?
He cares about you and quite protective (unless you’re Scott)
Very caring and always remembers little details about you
I’m imagining the friendship would start when Scott said something about Logan (damn Scott 🤨) and you defended him <3
C = Cuddles (Do they like to cuddle? How would they cuddle?)
Hugh jackman says he’s a big cuddler so it’s canon to me that Logan is too I SAID WHAT I SAID
Obviously he would never admit it to anyone but he LOVES to cuddle
He loves when you lay your head on his chest and he’s stroking your hair… I’m sobbing I need this man so bad
D = Domestic (Do they want to settle down? How are they at cooking and cleaning?)
Plot twist: Logan 2017 ended differently and it actually ended with you, logan and laura being a family and living in a cute little house away from everyone 😍 someone get marvel on the phone I HAVE AN IDEA
You and Logan have a deal, you cook and he cleans because this man cannot cook to save his life
E = Ending (If they had to break up with their partner, how would the do it?)
oh!😄
he seems like the type to just pack up his things, leave a note and leave lol idk I’m trying to keep this happy
F = Fiance(e) (How would they feel about commitment? How quick would they want to marry?)
He would marry you in a second he loves you too much or you could be like one of those couple that stay together for so many years without getting married because they don’t care 🫶🏻
G = Gentle (How gentle are they, both physically and emotionally?)
LOGAN IS SO GENTLE WITH YOU
I don’t write smut but I read this one fic years ago where he didn’t want to hurt the reader during sex and it had me blushing and kicking my feet 😭
emotionally, he respects your boundaries and listen to what you have to say.
H = Hugs (Do they like hugs? How often do they do it? What are their hugs like?)
Doesn’t hug anyone but you <3
Old man logan loves them!! (fuck i should’ve done this with old man logan lol maybe in the future)
Currently picturing old man logan coming home from work and you’re like doing the dishes or something and you don’t hear him come in and he hugs you from behind 😭
I = I Love you (How fast do they say the L-word?)
again I don’t write smut BUT what if I said that the first time Logan said I love you was either when one of you had a near death experience or your first time having sex
THERE IS NO INBETWEEN
Doesn’t say it right away until y’all fuck or one of you almost dies lol ladies he is the ideal man
J = Jealousy (How jealous do they get? What do they do when they’re jealous?)
I’m going to take this opportunity to thank anyone who has ever written jealous logan fics, you are the reason for my happiness and I hope you get everything you e ever wanted <3
This man is protective of you, if he sees some guy in a bar bothering you bitch the claws are coming out
K = Kisses (What are their kisses like? Where do they like to kiss you? Where do they like to be kissed?)
Logan’s kisses give you much comfort like if you’re stressed because of some stupid shit scott did (🤨) (dw i love scott) he’ll give you kisses <3
He loves kissing your lips obviously but a simple forehead kiss is his go to
old man logan giving you hand kisses!!
And what if I said that logan loves to be kissed on his neck?🤨🤨
L = Little ones (How are they around children?)
When Laura comes into your lives, he’s trying to be a good father obviously but before Laura, he ok
Like if we’re talking toddlers then he wouldn’t know how to act around them. Confused 100% when they give him a toy phone
M = Mornings (How are mornings spent with them?)
If he wakes up before you then he’ll definitely let you sleep in
He loves a good morning cuddle and kiss.
If neither of you have class to teach in the morning then yes you’ll sleep in but if you do then you’ll wake up earlier than him and do your morning routine
N = Nights (How are nights spent with them?)
movie nights if you aren’t too tired or you’ll just talk about random things in bed and eventually drift off to sleep
You’ve admitted to Logan that his voice helps you fall asleep <3
O = Open (When would they start revealing things about themselves? Do they say everything all at once or wait to reveal things?)
So in the beginning of your relationship, logan didn’t open up right away but as time went on he trusted you more and more so you helped him talk about his past
He doesn’t reveal everything all at once more like when you’re in bed or taking a bath together and you’re laying against him and he starts talking about his life
P = Patience (How easily angered are they?)
By Scott? So easy
it doesn’t take a lot to anger him, but he’s trying to be a calmer person especially if Laura is there
Q = Quizzes (How much would they remember about you? Do they remember every little detail you mention in passing, or do they kind of forget everything?)
He remembers everything. He has a good memory when it comes to you. He knows your likes and dislikes, even if you mentioned it like years ago, favorite foods, movies, songs.
R = Remember (What is their favorite moment in your relationship?)
His favorite moment is when you met for the first time. It’s when he also met charles too. He walked into charles’s office and that’s when he saw you, standing next to charles. He didn’t believe in love at first sight, but you completely changed his mind.
S = Security (How protective are they? How would they protect you? How would the like to be protected?)
Like I mentioned before, he’s protective of you. Hates seeing you get hurt during missions. He knows you can handle it, but still he doesn’t like it.
T = Try (How much effort would they put into dates, anniversaries, gifts, everyday tasks?)
I see him actually putting in effort like if he decides to one day have a picnic with you in the schools garden, he’ll ask storm to make sure it doesn’t rain and find the prettiest flowers to give you
U = Ugly (What would be some bad habits of theirs?)
He pushes people away. He has a tendency to do that so he isolates himself. You give him so space then try to work things out
V = Vanity (How concerned are they with their looks?)
He isn’t too concerned until he starts looking like old man logan. That’s when he thinks you won’t like how wrinkled and grey he looks but you shower him with love and affection because that’s what he deserves <3
W = Whole (Would they feel incomplete without you?)
You and Laura are his whole world. (now I’m imagining rogue joining the fam and meeting Laura and it’s so cute omg)
X = Xtra (A random headcanon for them)
He kisses you so much that if you change your chapstick flavor he will notice. Like I imagine you changed it from cherry to coconut and he’ll be talking to storm or charles and you pass by and give him a quick kiss and he’s like “hold up☝🏻🤨” and kisses you again just to make sure he wasn’t making it up and tells you “you changed the flavor? But Cherry was my favorite😔😒”
Y = Yuck (What are some things they wouldn’t like, either in general or in a partner?)
Scott summers
Z = Zzz (What is a sleep habit of theirs?)
Naps after missions are a must
His sleep schedule is totally messed up lol
397 notes · View notes
queenofvelaris · 3 months ago
Text
Worthy
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Steve Rogers x fem!reader
Word count: 9.7k (don’t look at me)
Contains: ANGST but with a happy ending, mentions of abuse, self-deprecation, Tony’s stupid quips, fight scenes (its age of ultron duh), tooth-rotting fluff, minor character deaths
Disclaimer: I own none of the characters in this story. Everyone except for the reader and her family belongs to Marvel.
Author’s Note: hiiii so I wrote this in 2021 when I was going through a really dark time. It brought me so much peace to write it and I figured it was time I share it with the world. Reblogs, likes, and comments are much appreciated and I would love to hear your thoughts (such as if I should post more cause I got more 🫣) anyways I hope you like it!!
***
Worthy. What a ridiculous word. A hypocritical one, too. There are those who believe with everything they’ve got— even to the point of being prideful— that they’re worthy. Others hope that they are. And the rest feel, deep down inside, that they’ll never be worthy.
“I bet it’s a trick,” Clint commented, spinning drumsticks between his fingers. He was sat next to Maria, and on his other side, Bruce and Natasha were deep in conversation. Tony and Rhodey sat on the futon. Dr. Cho was asleep.
Thor chuckled and handed a newly opened beer bottle to Steve. (Y/N) was on the carpet, her back against Steve’s strong legs. Thor shook his head. “No, no. It is much more than that.”
“Whosoever be he worthy shall haveth the power,” Clint mocked in a Shakespearean voice that made (Y/N) snort. “Whatever, man!”
Thor grinned and indicated his hammer, propped up on the coffee table. “Please, be my guest.”
Tony smirked at Clint. “Go ahead!”
Clint raised his eyebrows. “Really?” He leaped to his feet.
“Oh, this is gonna be beautiful,” Rhodey remarked.
Steve leaned down and whispered in (Y/N)’s ear. “Five bucks says he gives up after five seconds.”
“You’re on,” (Y/N) shot back. “I say ten seconds… gotta give the man a little credit.” She smiled to herself as Steve tickled her shoulder. If she were on the same level as him, she’d tickle him right back.
From the very beginning of the Avengers initiative, after that whole mess in 2012, Steve has always been the one (Y/N) was closest to, Clint being a very close second. It was an instant click. They loved the same movies, traded jokes and sarcastic comments, trained together, and even fell asleep next to each other on the couch on days off. Three years later, they are as close as ever.
Clint approached Mjölnir, a swagger in his step. Tony leaned forward in his seat. “Clint, you’ve had a tough week. We won’t hold it against you if you can’t get it up.”
Everyone chuckled at that and Clint ignored them, eyeing Thor. “You know I’ve seen this before, right?”
He reached for the handle and tugged, grunting as he did so. About five seconds later, he gave up, shaking his head. “I still don’t know how you do it!”
“Smell the silent judgment?” Tony jeered at Clint as (Y/N) grudgingly handed Steve five bucks.
Steve made it better with a flash of his perfect smile and a wink from his pretty blue eyes. Beaming, she rolled her eyes and focused on the petty ones in the room.
Clint held out his hand. “Stark, by all means.”
Tony shrugged and stood, earning a chorus of “Uh oh”, “Mmm-hmm”, “Oh here we go.” He practically strutted over to the hammer. “Never been one to shy away from an honest challenge.”
“Yeah, but how often do you win ‘em?” (Y/N) muttered and Steve laughed so hard he choked on his beer. Rhodey and a couple others went “ooo!”
Tony shot her a playful glare and looped his wrist through the loop on the top of the handle. “It’s physics.” He glanced at Thor. “Alright, so, uh, if I lift it, I then rule Asgard?”
Thor nodded benevolently. “Yes.”
Tony grasped the handle and put one foot on the table. “I will be reinstituting Prima Nocta.” He grunted and pulled, but the hammer didn’t move at all. He removed the loop and cleared his throat. “Be right back.”
He stormed away and came back not one minute later with an Iron Man glove from his latest model. “That’s cheating!” Maria called.
Tony put it on and grasped the handle. “And I’m Tony Stark.” He yanked on the handle, but the Asgardian weapon remained unmovable. He turned his hand and little turbines came out of the arm, acting like a rocket. Still, Mjölnir stayed still as a rock.
(Y/N) shook her head, grinning as Tony struggled with the hammer. “Give it a rest, pretty boy, you can’t lift it.”
“I can and will, sugar lips,” Tony retorted good-naturedly. He waved Rhodey over and the latter put on his own hand gear from War Machine. Watching them try and lift it together was hysterical and (Y/N) could barely breathe, she was laughing so hard.
Next up was Bruce, who climbed on the table and screamed when he couldn’t lift the hammer. Everyone stared at him in amusement and he flushed pink, embarrassed.
(Y/N) had her head on Steve’s knee when Maria tried and failed. The former S.H.I.E.L.D. agent turned to (Y/N). “Alright, you’re up.”
She lifted her head, chewing on her lip. “Oh, no. I, uh, I’m not doing it.”
Tony whined. “Come on! After Capsicle and Shakespeare in the Park, you’re the strongest one here!”
He wasn’t wrong. That’s another reason she and Steve were both so close-- they were the only enhanced beings in the tower. Her super strength and cat-like agility earned her the nickname of The Leopard, only she wasn’t experimented on. Her mom had been a chemist for S.H.I.E.L.D. when (Y/N) was young, and one day she came to work with her mom and there was an explosion that resulted from the leak of a new serum designed to replicate the one inside Steve. She and her mom both got struck. The result? She got powers and her mom was killed.
“I’m not lifting it, Stark,” she said firmly. She held his gaze. Normally, she’d sigh at the sight of those puppy dog eyes and grudgingly give into whatever task he wanted her to complete. But this… this was different.
Thor boomed, “It is not about strength, Stark. It is about worthiness.”
And I’m the least worthy person here, she said silently.
Steve petted her head for a second before patting her shoulder. “I’ll try.”
Grateful, she shuffled to the side to let him stand. She took his place on the couch next to Thor and watched as he rolled up the sleeves of his button-up. His blonde hair glowed in the light and his arm muscles flexed as he gripped onto the hammer.
Clenching his jaw, Steve tugged on the hammer… and it moved slightly. Thrilled, (Y/N) stole a glance at Thor’s face and nearly pissed herself. Thor looked so shocked. Stifling her laughter, she watched as Steve pulled on the handle once more before letting go, holding up his hands in surrender.
Thor audibly blew out a sigh of relief, a small smile returning to his face. (Y/N) shoved his arm. “Don’t worry, no one’s coming for your throne, Thunder.”
Steve chuckled at that and sat back down next to her. Everyone looked at Nat, who smiled and took a sip of her beer. “Oh, no, no, that’s not a question I need answered.”
Tony raised his bottle. “All deference to the man who wouldn’t be king, but it’s rigged.”
Clint clapped Tony on the shoulder. “You bet your ass.”
Maria piped up, “Steve, he said a bad language word.”
“Did you tell everyone about that?” Steve demanded, glaring at Tony as (Y/N) buried her face in his shoulder to smother her laughter. Steve wrapped his arm around her instead of pushing her away, and when she lifted her head, she had to look away from Natasha, whose smirking expression was directed right at her and Steve. Nat has caught them curled up together on the couch before, and each time (Y/N) has told her “Steve is my best friend.” Even though I want more.
Tony leaped to continue his previous train of thought. “The handle’s imprinted. Like a security code. ‘Whosoever is carrying Thor’s fingerprints’ is I think the literal translation.”
“Yes, that’s a, uh, very, very interesting theory,” Thor replied, standing with his Asgardian ale in one hand. “I have a simpler one.” He lifted the hammer with ease and flipped it, catching it gracefully. “You are all not worthy.”
(Y/N) shook her head with a small smile on her face, Steve and Clint laughed, Rhodey and Bruce scoffed, Tony groaned a “Come on!” and Maria and Natasha exchanged looks with the now awake Dr. Cho.
Suddenly, a loud feedback whine pierced the air and everyone reacted, some stiffening and the others covering their ears. Tony frowned and pulled out his transparent pad that controlled everything in the tower.
A voice that sent chills down (Y/N)’s spine came to their attention, as well as the clanking of metal. “Worrrrrrtttttthhhhyyyy.” A tattered, roughed-up-looking version of one of Tony’s suits lurched into the living room, leaking oil. It turned to face them. It flourished its hand, and when it spoke next, its voice was clearer, more masculine, and much more sinister. “No. How could you be worthy? You’re all killers.”
At that, (Y/N) stiffened as dread rooted deep down in her gut. Steve let go of her and stood, his stern eyes fixed on the robot. “Stark,” he challenged without looking at the billionaire.
“J.A.R.V.I.S.,” Tony called.
“I’m sorry, I was asleep.” The suit turned his head, the lights in his eyes flickering. “Or I was a dream.”
Tony tapped on the pad. “Reboot. We’ve got a buggy suit.”
The robot in front of them shielded his face. “There was this terrible noise, and I was tangled in… in…” he looked down at the wires and spare parts keeping the frame together. “...strings.”
(Y/N) and everyone else who had been sitting set down their drinks and stood, all of them tense. The suit flourished his hand again. “Had to kill the other guy… he was a good guy.”
“You killed someone?” Steve asked, serious and condescending.
Those words and his tone made (Y/N) feel a little sick, but she willed herself not to react and instead focused on the terrifying suit, which glanced at the floor. “Wasn’t my first call. But… in the real world, we’re faced with ugly choices.”
“Who sent you?” (Y/N) asked calmly.
The suit straightened up as the sound of a tape rewinding filled their ears. “I see a suit of armor around the world,” Tony’s voice came through.
Tony’s face paled. Bruce stared at him. “Ultron.”
(Y/N), Steve and Thor shot a bewildered look at Tony, while Natasha, Rhodey, and Clint all looked at Bruce for answers. Maria cocked her gun and Thor’s grip on his hammer tightened. (Y/N) clenched her fists and exchanged a look with Steve.
“In the flesh,” the suit answered. “Or, no, not yet. Not this… chrysalis. But I’m ready. I’m on a mission.”
Natasha tilted her head. “What mission?”
Ultron jutted his chin out, and if he had a real form, (Y/N) was sure he would be smiling. “Peace in our time.”
Three of Tony’s suits burst out of the wall, concrete and plaster raining down like hail. Almost everyone dove for cover. Steve flipped up the coffee table just in time for a suit to collide with it, sending both (Y/N) and Steve over the couch.
He immediately reached for her, his eyes wide. “You okay?”
“Yeah.” She scrambled to her feet at the same time he did. She ducked as one of the suits flew straight over her head and watched Thor smack it with his hammer.
She hurried over to the bar, where Natasha and Bruce were hunkered down, the assassin using her gun. Maria was also firing her gun, Clint was nowhere to be seen, and Rhodey tumbled through the glass window onto the landing below.
Grabbing a long skewer, she leaped onto the back of a suit that was towering over a terrified Dr. Cho. (Y/N) tried to impale the skewer in between the helmet and neck, hoping to dismantle some of the wires, but it threw her off and into the grand piano with a great crash. The impact barely hurt her, but it certainly knocked the air out of her lungs. She tumbled onto her back, winded, and her eyes widened in fear when the suit faced her.
Unbeknownst to her, Ultron cocked its head and turned his attention toward her. “Interesting.”
Natasha and Bruce hurried up the stairs, Clint barely missed a shot from a suit, Tony hopped onto the back of another one, and the suit looming over (Y/N) got distracted by Maria.
Her heart in her throat, (Y/N) watched as Steve got slammed against the wall on the second landing. He fell to the ground hard, groaning. Thinking quickly, she twisted her head and saw his shield. It was heavy as all hell for everyone else, but for her, it was nothing.
“STEVE!” She yelled, gripping onto the shield.
Steve bolted to his feet and at the same time, (Y/N) threw it to him like a frisbee. Thor dismantled one suit, Tony took down the other, but the third remained. With a spin, Steve threw his shield and it tore the suit in half.
It was over as fast as it had started. It was quiet for a second, the only sound being everyone’s panting. (Y/N) rubbed her neck and gripped onto the wall for support.
Ultron shook his head. “That was dramatic. I’m sorry, I know you mean well, you just didn’t think it through.”
Steve took a few angry steps forward and (Y/N) stiffened. Ultron continued. “You want to protect the world but you don’t want it to change. How is humanity saved if it’s not allowed to... evolve?” He bent and picked up the destroyed head of one of the suits. “With these? These puppets.” Ultron threw down the head and surveyed the room. “There’s only one path to peace. The Avengers’ extinction.”
Thor grunted and threw Mjölnir. The hammer smashed Ultron into pieces against the wall before flying back to Thor’s hand.
The lights in Ultron’s head sparked and flickered. In a sing-songy, raspy voice, the suit murmured, “I had strings, but now I’m free… there are no strings on me…” Then, it flickered and died.
Everyone remained frozen for a second as the tower’s lights flickered. Some went out. Steve rushed over to (Y/N), his intense fury softening as he looked at her. He reached to inspect her neck. “You okay?”
She nodded, though she was far from it. Ultron’s words about them being killers and his creepy disappearance… it unsettled her. She had a feeling they hadn’t heard the last of him.
She was right. Down in Tony’s lab, they realized Ultron had taken all of the Iron Man suits, Loki’s staff, important files, and hard drives. He was in the internet now and was most likely downloading everything he could about each and every one of them. The thought of that robot looking into her file made (Y/N) feel sick. Only Nick Fury had access to her file, but it was clear that Ultron could bypass that.
They also learned that Ultron could access anything he wanted, like nuclear codes. They all figured out that J.A.R.V.I.S. was the person Ultron killed. Tony revealed that he created Ultron because of a vision the female Maximoff gave him when they seized the scepter. He saw what he called “The Endgame,” and he didn’t believe the Avengers would be enough to save the world. Steve assured him that even if they lost the war, they would do it together.
That night, when all was quiet in the tower and everyone was asleep, (Y/N) began to toss and turn. She couldn’t get Ultron out of her head. The monstrosity followed her into the depths of her nightmares and made her feel trapped. Images of him infiltrating her file terrified her to no end.
She sat up and ran a hand through her hair. It was no use. She needed water, or milk. She climbed out of bed and padded to the elevator. It took her to the kitchen.
She was a few footsteps away from the fridge when she heard it. “(Y/N).”
Ultron. She spun around, her fists out, but there was nothing there. Shocked, she lowered her fists. But then, she heard it again, much more sinister. “(Y/N).”
“What do you want from me?” She tried her best to keep her tone harsh.
“Do they know?” Ultron’s voice was quiet and menacing.
(Y/N) stood at attention. “Do they know what?”
Ultron chuckled darkly. (Y/N)’s eyes darted every which way, but she couldn’t see him, only hear him. “What I read in that file of yours… how many years has it been since the “accident”? Or should we call it what it really is?”
She felt her blood go cold. He wasn’t talking about 2012. He was talking about when she was seventeen. Her breathing got more shallow.
Ultron continued. “I’ll ask again… do… they… know?”
“Please.” Her voice was nothing more than a whisper as her mouth dried up. Her hands began to shake.
“It’s the reason you’re not worthy to lift the God of Thunder’s mighty hammer.” The sarcasm in his voice made her heart beat faster. “You will never be worthy. How could you be? You’re a killer. Imagine how your closest friends would react. Just think of God’s righteous man seeing you for who you really are… ”
“No.” She covered her ears and squeezed her eyes shut. “No, no, no.”
His voice, his words… it didn’t stop. Monster… murderer…
The kitchen got darker and more confined, until (Y/N) felt like she was in a cage. The words got louder and louder until she screamed…
Drenched in sweat, (Y/N) jerked upright, panting. Her hands wildly felt around her. She was in bed. It had just been a dream.
But there was a truth to it that shook her to the core, a fear that she hoped and prayed would never come true.
A knock at her door nearly made her jump out of her skin. The intruder spoke up, their voice gentle. “(Y/N), it’s Nat. You okay?”
“Fine, Nat. Just a bad dream,” the girl lied. She fought to take deep breaths and slow her racing heart. “Sorry I woke you.”
She could tell Nat was hesitating so she forced more conviction into her voice. “Seriously, I’m okay. It’s not so bad tonight. Sorry again. Just… don’t mention it to anybody, okay? I’ll see you tomorrow.”
As the only girls in the Avengers, they shared this floor together. Unfortunately, nightmares were a common occurrence for (Y/N), and every time she accidentally woke up Natasha, guilt steadily consumed her. She never once let Natasha see her pain, her terror. No one could see. She was the “strong one”, the bold and cheeky (Y/N) that everyone knew and respected. Not the pathetic, shriveling mess that screamed herself awake in the middle of the night.
(Y/N) breathed a shaky sigh of relief when she heard Natasha’s footsteps recede. She was alone. Tears stung her eyes. Always alone.
She curled up in a ball and muffled her sobs, so as not to wake Natasha again.
***
It wasn’t long until they got a tip. Ultron had teamed up with Wanda Maximoff and her twin brother Pietro and were going to make a deal with an old weapons supplier of Tony’s. The rumor was that he had just come into a large stock of vibranium that Ultron wanted to get his hands on.
Pale yellow streams of light poked through the window when (Y/N) woke up. It was the morning of the raid. Silently, she climbed out of bed and suited up. She wore a dark blue leather coat that had leopard print on the inside-- courtesy of Stark. She also wore a blue leather top, black leather pants and boots, and her hair was done in a simple french braid down her back.
She crept into the kitchen and made a pot of coffee, like normal. On a regular day, she’d wake up before dawn and go for a run with Steve. Sometimes they raced each other, sometimes they just walked and talked. But last night, she’d barely gotten any sleep, and she had a feeling Steve would skip the run, too.
After she sat at the bar with her mug, Steve walked in, fiddling with one of his gloves. He was in full Captain gear, and the sight of him made (Y/N)’s heart flutter. He always looked handsome, but his uniform and cropped golden hair along with his gorgeous face and eyes always made heat rush to her cheeks. He was just as handsome as he was good and kind. She definitely didn’t deserve him.
Steve wordlessly made his own cup and sat next to her. His thumbs traced the sides of his mug. “You look tired.”
“Thanks,” (Y/N) muttered. She rubbed her temples. “Just didn’t sleep well.”
“You haven’t been sleeping well since Ultron attacked.” Steve peered at her with his signature mom expression. “You’ve been having nightmares again, haven’t you?”
(Y/N) stiffened and met his gaze. “Nat told you?”
Steve shook his head. “Last night I couldn’t sleep so I went for a run in the stairwell. When I reached your floor I heard screaming so I went to check on you, but Nat came out and stopped me. She told me you were okay and to just leave it.”
(Y/N) was quiet for a second. She felt a little guilty for thinking Nat would betray her. Steve covered her hand with his. “You know you can talk to me, right? I may not have gone through what you and Clint did during 2012, but I’ve seen my fair share of horrors.”
“You haven’t done what I’ve done, Steve,” she whispered, her voice hoarse.
Before she joined the Avengers, (Y/N) worked closely with Clint and Natasha at S.H.I.E.L.D. She was the only enhanced agent, and everyone fought to keep that a secret. Then, Loki arrived. He turned his scepter on her and Clint, forcing them under the control of the mind stone. It was then that Loki came to notice (Y/N)’s strength and agility. He used her as his prized second in command and ruthless assassin. A lot of the human lives lost in Stuttgart, on the S.H.I.E.L.D. Quinjet, and during the Battle of New York were because of her.
Steve sighed. “(Y/N), what’s it gonna take for you to forgive yourself? You were under mind control.”
She shook her head. “So was Loki, but everyone blames him.” She interlaced her fingers with his. “Controlled or not, I have the blood of innocents on my hands.”
For a moment, she imagined what it would be like to tell him about the accident, to share the overwhelming amount of guilt of murdering innocent people in 2012. Would he still be here, holding her hand? Or would he hate her as much as she hated herself? No. She couldn’t tell him. Not till she was ready.
Steve said nothing, just kept holding her hand. He changed the subject, much to her relief. “Are your nightmares about Ultron?”
“Sometimes.” (Y/N) took a sip of her coffee. “I don’t wanna face that Maximoff girl. You heard what she did to Tony.” The thought of someone infiltrating her mind again made her want to throw up.
“I won’t let her near you,” Steve said firmly. He gently placed his index finger under her chin and turned her face toward his. “Do you hear me? I’ll keep you safe, sweetheart.”
She smiled softly, transfixed by his baby blue eyes. His gaze flicked to her lips, and for a split second, he leaned forward—
“Lady (Y/N), are there any Strawberry Pop-Tarts left in the cabinet?” Thor called, trudging into the kitchen in full Asgardian armor.
Looking away from Steve, (Y/N) couldn’t ignore the disappointment washing over her. “Should still be a box on the top shelf, Thunder.” She let go of Steve’s hand, but she didn’t see that he looked crestfallen at the missed opportunity, too.
An hour later, they were all assembled on the Quinjet and headed toward the African coast. Everyone was pretty solemn during the trek, the silence only being broken by Thor’s ramblings and Tony’s jokes. But even the God of Thunder and the sass master himself were more grim than normal.
As they snuck into the salvage yard and the hatch of the Quinjet opened, (Y/N) exchanged a look with Steve. He reached for her hand, squeezed it once, and let go. She didn’t need to hear him speak to know he was telling her he’s got her back.
They ran into the building, finding the discarded bodies of workers all along the floor. Tony in his Iron Man suit led the way, followed by (Y/N), Steve, Thor, Clint, and Natasha. Bruce hung back on the Quinjet-- they didn’t need The Big Guy just yet.
They all split up inside the salvage yard just as Ultron yelled, “Don’t compare me with Stark, he’s a sickness!” He had forged a new suit for himself. The robot was now about seven feet tall with red eyes and a shiny metal body. His back was turned to them.
“Aww, Junior,” Tony called, his voice filtered through the Iron Man helmet. “You’re gonna break your old man’s heart.” He landed down with a clunk on the metal bridge, facing his creation. Thor and Steve were behind him. Natasha and Clint were sneaking in from the sides, and (Y/N) was coming in from the back. Their goal was to box the enemy in.
Ultron turned to face them, flanked by Wanda and Pietro. (Y/N) allowed herself a brief moment of wariness before putting her game face on. She was armed with batons about the length of her arm, coincidentally made of vibranium.
“If I have to,” Ultron drawled, his voice powerful and menacing.
“No one has to break anything,” Thor warned.
Ultron and the Maximoffs approached until they were a few feet away from the three Avengers. “Clearly, you’ve never made an omelet.”
Tony tilted his head. “He beat me by one second.”
(Y/N) shook her head at his almost proud comment. She delicately ducked behind the door behind the Maximoffs and Ultron, peering out at them.
“Ah, so this is funny… Mr. Stark,” Pietro remarked, his Sokovian accent thick. “It’s, what… comfortable?” He glanced down at the missiles and other weapons. “Like old times?”
“This was never my life.” Tony sounded much more serious now.
Steve took a step forward, his eyes on the twins. “You two can still walk away from this.”
Wanda cocked her head. “Oh, we will.”
Steve didn’t back down. “I know you’ve suffered.” They’d heard about the twins losing their parents and nearly dying themselves in the process.
“Ah… Captain America.” Ultron gazed at Steve condescendingly. “God’s righteous man.”
At that, (Y/N) flinched. Ultron had called him that in her nightmare. However, when she saw Steve’s familiar haunted look appear, her fear turned into anger. She withdrew one of her staffs from its sheath.
“Pretending you could live without a war,” Ultron continued. “I can’t physically throw up in my mouth, but-”
“If you believe in peace, then let us keep it,” Thor cut him off.
Ultron took a step closer. “I think you’re confusing peace with quiet.”
Tony was over it. “Yuh-huh. What’s the vibranium for?”
“I’m glad you asked that because I wanted to take this time to explain my evil plan,” Ultron drawled.
Suddenly, he pulled his metal fist back and the energy sucked Tony forward. Ultron blasted him back against the wall and everyone sprung into action.
Tony and Ultron went head to head as suits-- clearly designed by Ultron-- came pouring out of a doorway. Pietro was a blur as he went around, trying to attack the Avengers. His sister was more successful and managed to blast Steve back.
(Y/N) launched out from the doorway and used her strength and one of her batons to knock the head of a suit clean off its body. She leaped over the railing and landed on the bottom floor. A small grin worked its way onto her face as two suits came down to meet her, tall and strong.
She swept the legs out from under one and started to attack the other, but it dodged her heavy blow. She was grabbed by it but twisted her body, ran along the side of a crate, and flipped up and over the suit, tearing its head off.
Meanwhile, Natasha and Clint took down a lot of the weapons dealer’s crew, who were shooting at both the suits and the Avengers. Steve forced Pietro to the ground a little ways away from (Y/N). His eyes flicked over to her, watching her battle Ultron’s minions. He’d been keeping his eye on her, and he was relieved and proud that she was holding her own. He smiled and went back to fighting.
Then Wanda struck.
It was Thor who went down first. A quick tendril of magic infiltrated his mind and turned his eyes red.
“Thor! Status!” Steve barked.
Nothing. He saw Thor falter and freeze in place on the second level as if he was frozen in time.
Immediately, he knew it was Wanda. He spun around, eyes wide and filled with worry. Before he could warn his girl, he was knocked backward by Pietro and witnessed his worst fear with a flick of Wanda’s wrist.
(Y/N) had no idea what was happening. She was easily taking down suit after suit, barely breaking a sweat. She heard static crackling in her earpiece but figured that was just a result of everyone’s efforts.
She was about to deliver a fatal blow to the largest of Ultron’s creations when it spoke. “Were you this talented of a fighter at seventeen, Agent (L/N)?”
(Y/N) froze in her tracks, her baton raised over her head. The suit climbed back onto its feet, its eerie eyes peering straight at her. When it spoke again, its voice bore a significant resemblance to that of Ultron’s. She felt like he was directly talking to her.
“That was your first kill.” It wasn’t a question… the suit knew. Ultron had examined her file.
(Y/N) swung at the suit, but her nerves made her sloppy. The suit grabbed her baton, locking her in place. “Did you enjoy your first kill as much as you enjoyed taking the lives you took in the Battle of New York?”
With a shriek, (Y/N) twisted her wrist and tore the baton free. She attacked the suit with both batons, her viciousness masking her vulnerable state of mind. When she’d backed the suit into a corner, she finally let up on her onslaught, panting. “I didn’t enjoy it. I didn’t enjoy it then, and I didn’t enjoy it in 2012. I’m not a killer. I was under mind control.”
“Not the first time. You became a murderer of your own accord.” The suit stood again, looming over her.
“Stop it.” (Y/N) shook her head violently.
The suit took a step forward. “How did it feel, watching his life slip away? How did it feel, realizing that you took a life and it was all for nothing?”
(Y/N)’s hands tightened around her batons, trembling. “Stop it.”
The suit was relentless. “How did it feel to be completely and utterly alone?”
“I SAID STOP!” (Y/N) screamed and lunged, but she never reached the suit. A flash of red was all she saw and then the room shifted.
She stumbled and dropped her batons, trying to grasp onto a crate, but she grasped onto a railing instead. It didn’t feel metallic; it was sleek and smooth. She turned her head and realized she was gripping a wooden railing.
She looked up, expecting to see the metal landing and the rest of her friends in the midst of battle. Instead, she saw a carpeted staircase with walls on either side.
Instantly, she felt cold, like someone dumped a bucket of ice water on her head. She was back home, back in the memory that haunted her sleep without relief.
She could hear the thumps from where she stood, tears already springing to her eyes. “No. No,” she choked out and sprinted up the stairs.
Even though she already knew what she would find at the top of the stairs, she still screamed. There was her dad, hovering over her baby brother, beating him bloody. It was obvious that Bobby was having trouble breathing. He was practically lying in a pool of blood.
Dad hated both (Y/N) and Bobby, but once (Y/N) got her powers, he couldn’t take out his aggression on her like when her mom was alive. Instead, he turned his attention to Bobby.
“Stop, you’re gonna kill him!” (Y/N) screamed, echoing the words she spoke when she was seventeen.
“Stay out of this, freak!” Dad roared, giving her a snarl that looked like a dog baring its teeth.
As if on autopilot, (Y/N) gripped onto his shoulders and ripped him away from Bobby. Unlike how it happened all those years ago, she was forced to watch his stumble in slow motion. She stood with her jaw dropped as he tumbled down the stairs and straight into the wall, his head colliding with the plaster so hard that a loud crack split the air. Blood seeped out of the wound, and he lay perfectly still. He was dead.
(Y/N) stared at her hands in revulsion. But tears began to fall when she realized what would happen next.
She whirled around and knelt next to her baby brother, whose chest was heaving and shuddering. This. This was what she saw almost every night, the image that never seemed to escape her. “Hey, hey, Bobby, please. Please. Stay alive. Please, don’t go. Don’t leave me alone!”
Bobby’s innocent eyes met hers briefly before closing. His chest rose once more, but it did not fall. He, too, was still.
“NO!” (Y/N) screamed, scrabbling at his body.
Bobby’s body disappeared in a cloud of smoke, and (Y/N) covered her face with her hands as she cried. She was too late to save him. She tried, but in doing so she killed her dad. He was a menace, but she’d never wanted to hurt him. She never wanted to hurt anybody.
But the nightmare was far from over.
“(Y/N)?” A familiar voice spoke. However, instead of the normal softness and affection in his voice, this time his tone was laced with disapproval and disgust.
(Y/N) leaped to her feet and turned around, wiping her eyes. Steve stood there, his helmet off. Behind him was Tony, Natasha, Clint, Thor, and Bruce. They all looked horrified and furious.
“You just killed your dad,” Bruce said in a hushed voice.
(Y/N)’s hands began to shake. “I didn’t mean to. It was an accident. I-I just-”
“No, no, no, you don’t get to justify what we just saw,” Tony snapped, holding up his finger.
Tears burned (Y/N)’s eyes. “I was a kid. My powers weren’t under control yet! You have to believe me!”
Natasha and Clint looked disappointed. The former Red Room assassin shook her head in disbelief. “I was trained to become a killer. You became one on your own.”
“I didn’t mean to kill him.” (Y/N) couldn’t stop the stream of tears as they steadily dripped down her cheeks. “I was just trying to save my brother.”
“And how’d that work out for you?” Clint scoffed. “How many more dads did you kill in 2012? No wonder Loki chose you-- you’re wicked, just like him.”
(Y/N) couldn’t breathe. She clutched her ribs, desperately forcing air into her lungs. “It wasn’t my fault. It wasn’t my fault. Guys, please.” She looked at the people she saw as her siblings. “Clint? Nat?” They’d said they understood about 2012… but they were looking at her with pure venom.
One by one, her team turned their backs to her and walked away, disappearing into vapor. The only one who remained was Steve, whose head was lowered.
“Stevie?” (Y/N) tentatively approached him, reaching for his hand.
He ripped it away like she’d burned him and she recoiled. Steve fixed her with a cruel glare. “Now I know why you refused to pick up Thor’s hammer. You’re not worthy, and this is why.”
(Y/N) felt her heart shatter into a million tiny pieces. “Steve-”
“I thought the world of you. I wanted the best for you. I wanted a future with you.” Steve’s voice was low and dark. “Now… I don’t want anything to do with you.”
A sob escaped her lips before she could stop it and she fell to her knees. “Stevie, please!” She grabbed his hand and he pulled it away, walking away from her.
“Stevie, please, come back!” (Y/N) begged and pleaded, but she received no response.
Convulsing with sobs, she curled up on the floor, crying her heart out. Her worst fears had just been realized. The Avengers hated her as much as she hated herself for what she did, and Steve, her Captain… he hated her, too.
“It wasn’t my fault, it wasn’t my fault,” she whispered brokenly, wishing she could turn back time and reverse everything. “It wasn’t my fault.”
And that’s how Steve, the real Steve, found her.
When his vision cleared, he hauled himself up. Clint gave him the status report that he took Wanda out of the running, at least temporarily, and the archer went to look for Natasha.
Steve’s mouth went dry. Where was his girl? He reached for his earpiece, ready to command her to tell him where she was, when he heard it. The sobs.
He ran faster than he ever had in his life. It took him only a second to find her, curled up on the floor and crying.
He fell to his knees beside her, tearing off his helmet and setting down his shield. “(Y/N)... hey, hey, hey.” His hands fidgeted, longing to touch her but afraid of how she’d react. “Sweetheart, look at me. Open your eyes and look at me.”
(Y/N) obeyed him, but her mind was still trapped in another world. Her eyes darted lazily around, the flow of tears never ending. She met his gaze and he flinched when he saw the raw brokenness in their depths. “It wasn’t my fault... it wasn’t my fault.”
Steve frowned and this time, he touched her. He ran his fingers through her hair, which had fallen out of its neat french braid. “What’s not your fault, sweetheart?”
“Please, you have to believe me,” she cried. “It wasn’t my fault, Stevie. You have to believe me. You have to believe me.”
“Hey, hey, shh. It’s okay. I believe you.” Steve’s tone was soft and gentle as he cooed to her, trying to calm her down. Frankly, he was freaked out, too, by her state and what he saw in his own vision. And he was angry. He’d been complacent. He promised her he would keep her safe, that he wouldn’t let Wanda infiltrate her mind. But he was careless, and now his girl was a wreck.
(Y/N) locked eyes with Steve, a bit of hope returning to her (e/c) depths. “It wasn’t my fault.”
“It wasn’t your fault,” Steve confirmed, forcing a smile.
Clint’s voice comes in on the earpiece. “All the tin men are down, but the Maximoffs are gone. So is Ultron. Tony said the Big Guy escaped and he’s fetching him. I think we need to head back to the jet. Tasha’s in bad shape.”
Steve pressed his own earpiece, looking down at the sweet girl who was crying silently next to him. “So is (Y/N). We’ll meet you at the jet.”
He placed his shield on his back and gathered (Y/N)’s weapons, placing them in his belt loops. He gently worked his arm into the crook of her knees and wrapped his other arm around her back. He stood, cradling her in his arms. “C’mon, sweetheart. Let’s get outta here.”
She curled into him, and even though her tears had stopped flowing, she was still looking around blankly, like her mind was still adrift.
He carried her out of the warehouse, through the salvage yard, and onto the Quinjet. Natasha was slumped in a corner, pale and trembling. Thor looked tense and bewildered. Clint was unaffected vision-wise, but he was pacing the floor of the jet and scratching his head.
When Steve entered the jet, Clint turned and stiffened. “Oh, shit.”
Steve ignored his comment, clueing the archer into how worried Steve was. He followed closely as Steve sat down on one of the seats, arranging (Y/N) so she lay comfortably across the seats with her head in his lap.
“What did she see?” Clint asked quietly.
Steve shook his head, his eyes trained on (Y/N)’s face. His fingers gently combed through her hair, and his other hand traced light designs on her hand. “I don’t know. She wasn’t making much sense. She kept saying something wasn’t her fault. I’ve never seen her like this.”
Clint’s gaze was soft as he looked at her. “I was with her when Loki’s spell lifted. She barely spoke after.” He glanced at Steve. “Actually, it was you who got through to her. You got her to talk again. What Loki’s magic made her do… it damaged her. Being mind-controlled once is no joke, but twice?” He sighed. “Poor kid.” He stood and walked over to the pilot’s seat.
Steve’s heart was heavy, but at the same time filled with warmth. Had he really been the one to help (Y/N) come back to herself after 2012? As he gazed down at her, he decided it would be his job to bring her back this time, too.
So he kept stroking her hair, whispering to her. “(Y/N). Come back to me, sweetheart. It’s me, Stevie. If anyone can fight back against the power of that vision, it’s you. You’re strong, so strong. Stronger than all of us. I’m here. Your family’s all here. Just come back. I’ve got you, and I’m never letting you go. I promise. You’re safe with me.”
Though (Y/N) didn’t respond, her eyes flicked to meet his gaze and he could’ve sworn he saw a sparkle of recognition return to her eyes. Encouraged, Steve kept talking.
He lost himself in his quiet affirmations and gentle words to her, so much so that he didn’t notice Thor, Clint, and even Natasha watching. Thor and Clint smiled slightly, and Natasha, as shaken as she was, felt emotional watching the tender display. It was really obvious to everyone except Steve and (Y/N) that they had fallen for each other.
The three of them were so moved that when Tony and Bruce returned, Clint went out to meet them and warned them to keep their voices down and not make any comments-- with that bit being directed at Tony-- about what they were about to see.
All Tony said when they walked onto the jet and saw Steve with (Y/N) cradled on his lap was a grumbled, “Finally.”
***
They decided that it was too dangerous to return to the Tower. Ultron was everywhere, and after the whole Hulk incident they needed to lie low. Clint guided the jet toward a location he refused to tell the others about, and spoke quietly with Tony. They were the only two who hadn’t been hit with a vision at the salvage yard.
Thor was acting a little gruffer than normal, Natasha was quiet, and Bruce was weary, but the one they were really worried about was (Y/N). For the entirety of the Quinjet ride, her head rested on Steve’s thigh as she slowly came back to reality. It was Steve’s gentle touches and grounding words that eventually brought her back. But even then, she was uncharacteristically quiet and withdrawn.
“We’re almost there, sweetheart,” Steve whispered. “Just keep your eyes on me. Don’t slip back into your head.”
She nodded once, her face lined with sadness and a hint of fear. It made Steve’s heart ache. He kept his blue eyes locked with her (e/c) ones. “Do you remember Clint and Natasha? They’re like your brother and sister. We’re your family. You’re safe with us.”
He kept having to repeat these statements in order to keep her present. He did so without complaint and with a heart full of affection and concern for his girl.
At the mention of Clint and Natasha, the fear grew on her face and Steve moved his hand from her hair to her face. He gently tucked a strand of her hair behind her ears. “We’re not gonna hurt you. We all love you. I-” He swallowed. “… care about you so much, (Y/N). You’re safe with us, okay?”
“Okay, Stevie.” Her voice was small and quiet, reminding Steve of his mom after getting her ass handed to her by his dad. He hated it, and wanted nothing more for (Y/N)’s smile to return. So, he kept forcing a smile for her sake and continued anchoring her with his words and touches.
After a few hours, Clint landed the jet next to a farmhouse. Steve stood and held out his hands to (Y/N). “Can you stand for me, pretty girl?”
She nodded shakily and stood, taking his hands. He wrapped his arm around her protectively. The other Avengers watched with a mixture of worry and awe on their faces.
He and (Y/N) trailed behind as Clint helped Natasha walk and led Bruce, Tony, and Thor inside the house. When Clint’s pregnant wife appeared, who the Avengers had no idea about (except for Natasha), they all were stunned. Laura and Natasha caught up and Clint introduced them all to his kids and explained why he kept their location a secret.
(Y/N) tried to smile and hesitantly shook Laura’s hand. The yelling of the kids and the chatter of the others made her tense up. Steve rubbed her arms and made eye-contact with Clint.
Having seen (Y/N) go through something like this once before, Clint strode over to them and kept his voice low. “Tasha’s gonna sleep with Laura. Me, Tony, Thor, and Bruce will sleep in the living room. You two can take the guest room.”
(Y/N) was too in her head to fully process what he said, but Steve’s eyes widened. He opened his mouth to question why he and (Y/N) should share a room and protest that it wasn’t appropriate, but Clint rolled his eyes. “Just take the damn room. Go. You’ll thank me later.”
Wordlessly, Steve took (Y/N)’s hand and-- after hearing Clint’s directions-- guided her upstairs. He entered a small but quaint room and shut the door. (Y/N) silently sat on the bed, her eyes on her hands.
Steve exhaled deeply. He walked to her and crouched in front of her, taking her hands in his. She met his gaze, her expression clouded. Steve squeezed her hands lightly. “Talk to me, sweetheart. What did you see? I want to help you.”
“You won’t once I tell you,” she whispered, tears pricking her eyes.
Steve’s tone was gentle but firm. “Try me.”
(Y/N) took a shaky breath. “Did… did I ever tell you how young I was when I joined S.H.I.E.L.D.?”
Steve frowned, concentrating. “You said you were seventeen. You were one of their youngest recruits.”
(Y/N)’s hands fidgeted in his grip. “Did I say why I joined?”
“You said you didn’t want to go to college, that you wanted to work there to honor your mother.” Steve sounded puzzled.
She chewed on the inside of her cheek. “That-that was-um… it wasn’t the whole truth.”
Steve looked at her encouragingly, and that just made it harder for (Y/N). She swallowed. “After I-uh… after I got my powers and my mom died, my dad… he became more violent. He was violent before, but losing Mom just… it just made him snap. He knew he couldn’t hurt me anymore, so he started taking it out on my baby brother. He was only twelve.”
“Go on.” Steve’s eyes were narrowed, but he made an effort to keep his voice soft.
The stinging tears made it difficult for her to see. “One-one day I heard my dad beating my brother, and when I found them, my brother was barely breathing. I yelled at my dad to stop, but he wouldn’t listen.” Tears trickled down her cheeks, one by one, and Steve let go of one of her hands to brush them away. “I eventually grabbed his shirt and shoved him away, but… but I-I shoved him toward the stairs.”
Steve closed his eyes and (Y/N) shook her head. “I couldn’t revive him. The fall killed him. I killed him.”
Steve’s eyes opened and he stared at her. “(Y/N), that was an accident. You didn’t kill him.”
“Stevie, I was too strong for him,” (Y/N) cried. “I should’ve-”
“Stop, stop, stop.” Steve cupped her face. “Sweetheart, you were a kid. Your powers weren’t under control yet. You didn’t mean to hurt your dad; you were just trying to save your brother.” And that monster doesn’t deserve your guilt and shame, he added silently.
(Y/N) sobbed once and Steve moved to sit next to her, pulling her onto his lap and encasing her in his arms. She cried into his shirt, staining it with her tears.
They sat like that for a minute, and he quietly shushed her and whispered words of reassurance. Once her sobs had died down, she pulled back a bit to look at him. “You… you believe me?”
“Of course I do.” His tone was matter-of-fact. Steve cupped her face again. “What happened to your brother?”
(Y/N) shuddered. “He broke a rib and it punctured his lung. I tried to give him CPR… but he was already gone. He’d lost too much blood.” The streams of tears continued to pour down her cheeks. “He was twelve, Stevie.”
Steve’s soul hurt for her, for that little boy he’d never gotten the chance to meet. He gently wiped her tears with his thumbs and kissed her forehead before pressing against it with his own. “I’m so sorry.”
(Y/N)’s small hands grasped onto his wrists as if they were her lifeline. “After that, I found Fury. He’s the only one who knows the whole story… other than you.” Her tone wobbled. “I asked him to lock me up. He gave me a job instead. He took a chance on me.”
Steve pulled her to him and his nose brushed her ear as (Y/N) continued to shake. “I’d managed to redeem myself in my mind. But then 2012 happened. When I realized what I’d done, what I’d been made to do… I was back in that house, with blood on my hands.” She gave a broken laugh. “It’s ironic, really. The girl with super-human strength and agility is weak in the head. She breaks everything she touches. She makes a fucking mess wherever she goes.”
“Stop, stop,” Steve pleaded, pulling back. “You’re strong, (Y/N). So strong. You’re stronger than me, that’s for damn sure, both mentally and in your heart. You don’t break everything you touch; you bring light to the darkest places. You gave a lost super-soldier a reason to smile again, inspired him to be the best hero he could be, which would never be half as good as you. When you make a mess, you own up to it. But you’ve never once willingly put someone in harm’s way. You’ve never once willingly allowed an innocent person to suffer. You love everyone around you with your whole heart.” Steve’s own eyes were brimming with tears now. “Everyone but yourself.”
(Y/N) stared at him. Steve took her hands in his and pressed kiss after kiss to her hands. “You’re a good person. It hurts me to hear you talk like you’re not.” He made eye-contact with her. “I have a feeling I know what you saw in that vision. You saw your dad and brother dying, right?”
“That’s… that’s not all.” Dare she speak the cursed words aloud? If she did… would that make it real? She covered her mouth briefly, looking anywhere but Steve. “You and the others hated me for what I did. You looked at me with pure disappointment. You-you told me… you told me that-that you didn’t want anything to do with me anymore.”
If it was even possible, Steve’s heart broke even further. “Oh, sweetheart.” He lifted her chin with his index finger, gently forcing her to look at him. A tear rolled down his cheek. “I could never hate you for what happened. Neither could the others. I’m sure if they found out, they’d all feel nothing but compassion for you. What happened? It wasn’t your fault. We’d never blame you. We all love you.” He moved his hand up to run the backs of his fingers against her cheekbone. She unconsciously leaned into his touch. Steve’s tone held sincerity when he said, “I love you.”
(Y/N)’s breath got caught in her throat. The flow of tears slowed, and Steve noticed. A small, watery smile tugged at his lips. “I love you, sweetheart. Have for a while now.” He shook his head. “And you don’t have to say it back—”
(Y/N) cut him off with a gentle whisper. “But I want to.” She wiped her cheeks and moved to cup his handsome face in her little hands. “I love you, Stevie.”
Steve gazed at her with softness and adoration. He leaned forward and kissed her chastely. The kiss was delicate, but for both of them it felt as if sparks were flying. When he pulled away, (Y/N) pouted and Steve laughed. He rubbed his nose against hers. “Trust me, sweetheart, when you’re feeling better, I’ll give you all the kisses you want. But I don’t wanna take advantage.”
(Y/N)’s heart fluttered. Whether it was because he was from the 40s, or because he was just a true gentleman, he was the most considerate man she’d ever met.
She scrubbed her face, stifling a yawn as she did so. Steve noticed. “I think someone’s tired. Lie down.”
She could hear a tiny bit of his Captain voice as he spoke, and that made her smile. She was exhausted, it was true. Barely sleeping for the past couple weeks on top of the emotional baggage of today was more than draining.
She climbed under the covers of the queen-sized bed, and before she could ask Steve to stay, he shuffled over to her. “Scoot over, big guy coming through.”
(Y/N) laughed softly and did as he asked. Pretty soon, her back was against his chest and his big arms were encircled around her. He sighed, content.
She felt herself falling asleep already, but curiosity nagged at her. “What did you see in your vision?”
Steve sighed again, but this time, she could practically hear the resignation in it. “I saw myself going back to the 40s and dancing with Peggy.”
A bolt of jealousy and unease struck her. “Why did Wanda show you that?”
Steve buried his face in her hair, lightly brushing his lips against her ear and making her shiver. “Because she wanted to show us all our biggest fear.”
The unease faded to confusion. “Why was dancing with Peggy your biggest fear?”
“Because she wasn’t you,” Steve said simply. She felt his embrace get a little tighter. “I still care deeply for Peggy, and I try to visit her as much as I can, but I stopped dreaming about a life where I had been with her once I realized my dreams were now about you. I stopped loving her the minute I fell in love with you. Dancing with her… it was a picture of the life I don’t want anymore. It was empty and lifeless because you were gone. You’re my best girl.”
Tears sprung to (Y/N)’s eyes once more. He seemed to sense this and moved his lips from her ear to her temple. He kissed her hair and brushed his nose along her cheekbone. “Let’s go to sleep.”
(Y/N) nodded, and when she spoke she was half teasing, half serious. “Dream of me?”
Steve chuckled. “Always, pretty girl.”
They fell asleep minutes later, the super-soldier holding his girl securely to his chest. They didn’t hear the door open a crack, nor did they see Natasha peek her head in.
She smiled softly when she saw them and shut the door. She turned to face Tony, Clint, Thor, and Bruce, who all eagerly awaited the report.
“They fell asleep cuddling in the bed.” Natasha grinned at Clint. “They finally exchanged their “I love you”s.
Clint had a huge smile on his face, and he turned to Tony and held out his hand. Tony grumbled and handed him a twenty-dollar bill. “You rigged it by giving them the same room.”
“Hey, I did that so he could comfort her in private.” Clint smirked and pocketed the money. “Them finally admitting their feelings was just an added bonus.”
Bruce glanced at Tony. “So if Clint betted they’d admit their feelings, what did you bet?”
“That the Leopard and Capsicle would break the bed,” Tony muttered nonchalantly.
Natasha thumped him and Bruce facepalmed himself. Thor beamed. “No, no. The Captain is far too chivalrous for that. The courting ritual back in Asgard--”
“We can hear you guys,” Steve called, his tone a mixture of tiredness and amusement.
Natasha grabbed the boys and shoved them away from the door. She apologized to Steve and (Y/N) and walked away, muttering, “I swear, men are idiots.”
***
Thanks for reading!!!
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imyourbratzdoll · 11 months ago
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𝒂𝒏 𝒐𝒃𝒔𝒆𝒔𝒔𝒊𝒗𝒆 𝒌𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝒂𝒔 𝒂𝒏 𝒆𝒏𝒆𝒎𝒚 𝒍𝒆𝒂𝒅𝒔 𝒕𝒐 𝒉𝒆𝒓 𝒇𝒂𝒕𝒆𝒇𝒖𝒍 𝒌𝒊𝒅𝒏𝒂𝒑𝒑𝒊𝒏𝒈
🍑peaches world (and the men that just exist in it) masterlist🍑
summary - the beginning on how you were kidnapped by the king of koopa kingdom, buckle in your seatbelts and enjoy the ride, because this will be a smutty rollercoaster.
warning - mentions of cock, kidnapping, inappropriate feelings/thoughts, swearing.
18+ only please, the gif isn’t mine, header created by me.
Warnings and Reminders - Please do not plagiarise, copy, repost/republish, adapt, or translate any of my work on any social media platforms, apps, or third-party sites. The only platforms I post my work on are: Tumblr and Wattpad. I do not own any character of any franchise (Marvel etc.) All my works are fiction and may be dark or triggering content: READ ALL WARNINGS BEFORE PROCEEDING.
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You watched your kingdom from above, it was a peaceful day as your people walked around and lived their lives happily. Usually, things were more of a ruckus. With a smile you turned and began to walk out of your room and down the hall, your pretty pink dress falling gracefully to the floor and sways with each step. You were happy, Lloyd and his brother Tangerine were currently out helping the people, so you had the castle to yourself.
You were wondering what you were going to do with your free time. You had many options, you could improve your parkour, do some painting that you always wanted to do but pushed to the side, you could go outside and tend to your flowers. The possibilities were endless and just as you were about to take the last step, a hand wraps around and covers your mouth. Your eyes widen, your hands immediately go up to try and pull whoever it is away. You freeze when they speak, feeling their massive body pressing against you.
“Shh, little Princess. You don’t want to warn the guards now, do you?” Ari Bowser Levinson is the one currently holding you. Your enemy, your rival. The King of The Koopa Kingdom. “That’s a good little Princess, staying nice and quiet for me.” You try to fight the shiver that runs through your body, knowing it’s wrong to feel this way when you are with someone. “Do you know how shit your security system is, Princess? I managed to slip right in, I mean. Someone really bad could’ve broken in and taken you for themselves, don’t you understand how dangerous that is.” He whispers like he isn’t the really bad person. You wiggle, trying to move away but you end up brushing your arse against him instead causing him to groan. “I wouldn’t do that, Princess. Unless you are wanting me to take you right here.”
You stop abruptly and your eyes widen, suddenly everything goes black. You don’t remember anything after that, and when you finally wake with your eyes fluttering open. You look around, confused. The walls and floors are grey, you tilt your head as you notice a large screen resting against the wall. Your attention is brought away from it when Ari enters the room. “Good morning, little Princess! Has my little Princess made herself comfortable in her new home?” He towers over you as he’s around 8 feet tall. He stalks closer, bending over to stare at your sitting form. “I sure hope so, because if I get my way, you will be staying here for the rest of your life!” He grins, and you shiver as it comes off evil-like. His eyes holding something much darker behind them. 
“Screw you and your plan, Ari! I’m sure Lloyd and his brother are already on their way to come rescue me!” You huff, arms crossing over your chest unknowingly pushing your breasts together and giving the older man/monster a lovely view. Your bottom lip juts out and you try to glare at him, failing miserably with how small and cute you are compared to him.
Ari coos, “You are correct, my smart little Princess. As far as I’ve been informed, they are already on their way!” He watches you jump with joy, your breasts bouncing with each movement, and he feels his cock twitch, licking his lips as soon the fun will begin. 
“Really?! They are coming?! That’s great!” You continue to jump, clapping your hands as a giant grin appears on your face. 
Ari laughs, shaking his head and moving closer to you. Backing you into the wall. “Not so fast, little Princess. Not everything is going to be easy for you.” He grins, placing his arm next to you against the wall. Ari directs you toward the screen, his arm wraps around you, making you feel even smaller, those darn tingles appearing again, and you try to push them away knowing how wrong it is. His hand reaches into his pocket, receiving a remote and you eye it. Your eyes move from the remote to his hands, wondering how they can still look so good with the claws. 
You had always heard stories before Ari turned his attention toward you and your kingdom. (Mostly you, but you didn’t think someone would be so obsessed with just you.) He was once a man that got his karma, being turned into half of a turtle. His already big build helped him mutate into something more monstrous. Horns in certain places, claws, sharp fangs, a larger cock. (Not that anyone got to see, but I guess it���ll be your lucky day.) 
Ari snaps you out of your thoughts, smirking when he catches you staring at his hands. “Two days have passed since I kidnapped you, little Princess. Where do you think Lloyd and his brother are now?” He hums.
“I presume they should be knocking at the door to enter the castle, right about now. I think…” You blink up at him, brows furrowed. 
Ari boops your nose, smirking wider than before. “Alright, if you have that much hope in your little boyfriend. Let’s watch it live to see how they are doing, shall we, little Princess?” You both face the tv, his large finger pressing the on button and he grins at your wide tear-filled eyes. 
“They’re at the beginning?! But how?! What are they still doing there?!” You yell in disbelief. Sure, the brothers were a bit slow sometimes, but you would’ve thought that saving you would make them go a bit faster. You begin to scream at the screen, hoping that they would be able to hear you. “It’s been two days, and you are still there?! I’m not even in that fucking world!” Ari chuckles behind his hand as he hears you swear, you look so cute as your cheeks puff out. “I’m in Bowser’s castle! Everyone knows it’s the biggest and most guarded of them all! Those are just fucking decoys!” You stomp your foot, practically throwing a tantrum, not noticing the big bad King sneaking closer behind you. “You fucking idiots! They’ll kill you now! Fucking watch out! That’s just the first Goomba of that level! Don’t let him touch you, you idiots!” 
“This is going to take a while, little Princess. So… Why don’t we have some fun while we wait.” Ari smirks as you turn with a confused look on your face. Before you can react, he rips your dress from your body, and you stand there with wide eyes. “Oh, we are definitely going to have some fun, little Princess.”
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would you like to follow the game? if yes, please click round 1 when the link is avaliable.
𝐫𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐝 1
thank you for reading!
feedback and reblogs are greatly appreciated.
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pretty-little-mind33 · 4 months ago
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DAVE WITH A FELLOW NERD FEM!READER
Ask: hiii, i have a dave lizewski request. it would be so nice to see headcanons for dave dating a nerd like him, except shes more quiet and sarcastic. like she and dave r the epitome of loser in the body of a hot person lmao. we need more loser x loser representation in dave fanfics HAHAHAH. hope this makes sense 😭😭😭
~ loser x loser is so real. i hope you like this! it's short and sweet 🫶 ~
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• Dave knows he's a loser and sure, sometimes, it bothers him but mostly? Mostly he doesn't mind. He likes the things he likes! (Plus being Kick-Ass does make him feel better about himself—he feels badass!)
• You also know you're a loser but unlike Dave, there isn't really any time when it bothers you. You have your friends and you're happy! So what if you're a little weird? Being weird is fun!
• Of course, neither you or Dave are in any way ugly—which makes things easier. Still, people don't ask you guys out because they're intimidated by both your niche interests and quirkiness.
�� You met Dave in class when he'd sat behind you and asked for a pencil. You handed him one with small cartoon figures of various comic characters, not thinking much of the interaction, but for him it was as if an arrow had stuck his chest.
• Love at first sight!
• Or just a really really really deep infatuation.
• He asked around about you, which of course ended up fruitless because no one is school knows much about you. You're shy. And anyways, the ones who do know just say you're guarded and that he shouldn't mess with you.
• Dave wasn't planning on messing with you! He just wanted to talk and ask you about comics (he's overjoyed to find out a girl seems to like comics like he does! A cute girl!)
• When you finally talk to him, you're directly sassy with him. "What do you want from me, Lizewski?"
• Dave's cheeks turn pink and he's blushing SO hard. "I- thank you for your pencil—" Of course he'd forgotten to give it back but he hands it to you now, his hands shaky, "I- I also like comics. Do you like DC? Marvel?"
• Your eyes lit up. Opportunity to talk about something you love?! YES PLEASE.
• Boom! Immediate friendship! You guys go on little dates to the comic book store (platonic in the beginning). If you're an artist, he likes watching you draw fan-art and if you're a writer he'll read your fanfiction lmaoo he's supportive like that.
• Dave will also cosplay with you if you're into that (only he won't cosplay as Kick-Ass, which you think is a shame considering he'd look soooooo good in the suit 😏😉)
• Your first kiss? Awkward af. If you have glasses, 100% your glasses hit his and he freaks out. You both mess it up but in the end you end up laughing SO hard.
• He's really sweet to you and his friends all joke that you and him are like the IT couple—but for nerds. He'll flip his friends off but kiss your cheek.
• Dave loves that he can ramble with you and you listen to him without complaining. He's SO comfortable around you because you're so similar.
• You both kinda feed into your interests and delusions and have the BEST laughs. He's really your best friend!
• Friends to Lovers duhhh 😜
• Dave would do the cringey/cute holding hand in the back pocket thing from movies and shows…yk the one! You'd pretend to hate it but secretly you'd love it and you want him to continue doing it!
• Dave is a big movie nerd. So movie nights every friday, including drive-in's if possible (you drive lol). He's also a big movie talker so he'll yap and yap but you don't mind.
• And if you do you'll throw popcorn in his face to shut him up.
• Overall, bbg is so boyfriend material for a nerd!reader! He just gets you and he's a silly guy who wants to make his gal happy 💞
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miley1442111 · 5 months ago
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birthday blues part 2- s.reid
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summary: spencer makes a choice that leaves you alone on an important day and causes something in your relationship breaks.
pairing: spencer reid x fem reader
warnings: birthday blues, spencer's an ass, cursing, talks of breaking up, no happy ending :(
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You walked to your favourite coffee shop the next morning, trying to get everything out of your mind. Your family had texted you over and over last night, wondering why you’d cancelled, and god, you felt awful for cancelling on them. 
But really, it wasn’t your fault. It was Spencer’s. A part of you wanted to just throw him under the bus and tell your parents what he did, but the other part, the part that was head-over-heels in love with him, made you feel like a bad person for even thinking that. 
A buzz in your pocket made you startle back to reality. You had your coffee, you were sitting in the sun and thinking over everything. 
Spencer ❤️: Can we talk soon? I’m so sorry and I love you. 
You sighed and put your phone down. The storm inside your head raged on, confusing you more and more. It had been months and months of this. He was never there. He wasn’t ever there for you either, when you truly thought about it, you realised that when he was there, he was unloading everything off of him onto you, or you two were having sex. Which was fine, for the most part. But, you wanted a real relationship, you wanted someone to be there for you, and you deserved it. You’d spent your whole life letting other people speak for you, you’d spent your whole life letting other people make your life harder just to make theirs easier. Enough was enough. 
You: I think it’s best if we don’t.
Spencer read it immediately and his heart sank. 
Spencer ❤️: What do you mean???
You: I mean that maybe we should see other people. 
Spencer ❤️: Why would we do that?
You: Because I’m sick of being second-best to everything and everyone in your life. You knew it was my birthday, you knew what it meant to me to let you meet my PARENTS, and you still didn’t have the fucking decency to show. I don’t want someone who brushes important things off. 
Spencer hadn’t slept a wink. He’d thought your relationship had been good, great even. What was all of this about? You were breaking up with him? Had he really fucked up that badly this time? He knew it was your birthday, yes. He knew it meant a lot to you to have him meet your parents, yes. He knew he had been putting your relationship on the back-burner for a while now, and yes, he felt bad. 
But come on, his life was difficult enough.
Spencer ❤️: Please can we just talk?
You: About what?
Spencer ❤️: Us?
You rolled your eyes as a tear finally slipped past your waterline. He really was just so… unknowable. How did you ever think you’d figure him out? How did you even think you’d be able to help him? To fix him? 
You: I don’t think there is an ‘us’ anymore. We want different things, and we’re both too stubborn to change. Don’t call me and don't come by my apartment. 
Spencer ❤️: Please can we talk about this. 
He was begging, and he didn’t even care. He wanted you- no, needed you. This wasn’t fair, he had to have a chance, you needed to give him a chance, at least.
You: You’ve had enough chances Spencer. 
As if you’d read his mind. He’d had a lot of chances, you were right. But he just needed one more, and he’d never fuck it up again, he swore. 
Spencer ❤️: Please Y/n, I’m sorry. 
You: Not sorry enough. 
And you blocked him. Fuck him. He didn’t deserve you. You deserved so much better. 
But Spencer Reid, he had a plan.
-------------------
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barzzal · 5 months ago
Text
call me crosby → part six
summary: Young, reckless, and rash, an unplanned pregnancy causes a massive rift in your relationship with then, cup-hungry 27 year-old Sidney Crosby. As he gets caught up in his own childish and selfish ways, confused to what was once certain, he lets you struggle alone. His absence reasons a miscarriage scare that leads you to end the relationship. Years after losing you, having to live a life that’s surrounded with the families his friends have built through the years embodies his greatest regret. Now with three cups and tons of awards at his disposal, Sid is given a chance to right his wrongs and win what was once the biggest loss of his life.
pairing: sidney crosby x fem!reader gen. warnings: language and theme, co-parenting, mentions of pregnancy & false miscarriage, sexual/suggestive themes, 18+ ch. warnings: parenting, tantrums, and a tad bit of angst genre: hockey rpf, fluff, angst, kid-fic, exes to lovers length: series; 5.2k masterlist: the barn, series masterlist
note: REALLY hoping i get to finish this while on my uni break. This was supposed to be posted on father's day but ya girl was on a trip i had to make most of it yk! Also, do note that the italicized part is a quick flashback. Anyway, happy reading! <3 (gif used: mine)
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disclaimer: this is a work of fiction. teasers, interviews, events, and the like that are included in the series are purely made for fictional purposes and do not/should not represent any of the names involved in real life. please proceed with caution.  
Two words. Terrible twos.
It was one of the things your mom has told you about raising a child of your own. It was a stage full of tantrums and frustrations; one you’ve never dealt with before. You were told that it was overwhelming, that you have to prepare yourself mentally and physically for it. However, your son, as the marvel child that he is, was so good at that age that you need not have to worry about it. 
Well, not until a few years later. 
“Mommy, please!” Luke wails in frustration from the living room. 
He has been asking for a little more screen time watching his show instead of doing his homework. And be that as it may, he has been adamant about not getting what he wanted. 
This has been going on for a couple of weeks, following Luke’s realization of not getting to play much of hockey. Frankly, as well as not seeing much of Sidney. 
“Honey, you’ve been watching for almost two hours. That’s enough.” you say, massaging your temple as you walk towards where he is, trying not to lose your temper.
You and your son have always been in sync. You have not really had the chance to reprimand or give him a good scolding. Lucas is a fairly calm child right from the beginning. To say the least, dealing with his temper tantrums now is a lot harder than you’ve prepared for. 
You see him sitting on the couch holding the remote tightly. His cheeks are still evidently damp from all the crying. You know he’s bound to strain his voice just by looking at him. 
“Two hours is not enough!” he appeals. Just like you thought, his voice is now nearly gone from all the screaming. “Please, I want my TV!” 
It is during times like this where you have to try harder as a mother. You know it will not always be rainbows with Luke. But despite your efforts to ensure that he would be able to express himself when you greatly need it, you can’t blame a child for not knowing exactly how he feels nor the reason for it. You just wish he’d be able to let you know even just a little. At least then, you could make it all better.
“Baby,” you endearingly call for him as you approach. 
With a soft smile on your face, you caress his hair. Your hands then fall to his cheeks so as to wipe his tears away. 
“You’ve already watched a lot of episodes today...” you carefully work your way in; gently reminding him of his acquired screen time. 
Frustratingly, Luke’s voice breaks as he tries to tell you he wasn’t going to watch any more episodes of Paw Patrol and the new Lego Spiderman. 
“Then what were you trying to watch?” you ask him with the same nurturing voice. 
You see Luke shoot a glance over the screen that you’ve already turned off half an hour ago. 
Yes, this has been going on for that long. 
“Mkay, you may turn it on so you can show me.” 
There comes a glint of hope in his eyes the moment he hears you. You fight the urge to chuckle, finding it quite adorable. 
Luke, now standing on his feet, finds the red power button and points it towards the television. Once it’s turned on, the thumbnail of a show greets you; one that you least expected– one that you clearly were not ready for. 
“So tell us guys, how can we make hockey more fun?” said the last voice you wanted to hear. 
Sid and Nathan in their respective jersey’s for a commercial a few years back comes into view. You know that it was one of his brand commitments that he still does to this day. You were just not aware that Tim Horton’s apparently had this particular video uploaded for everyone to see. 
As you watch the clip turn over to a handful of kids skating towards the two famed athletes, you make the mistake of taking the remote from your son to pause the short youtube clip quite hastily. You inevitably surprise him with your reaction thereby scaring him. 
Upon deducing that you were upset by the show that he has chosen, Luke begins to cry even harder than before.
Alarmed, you put away the remote and reached for him. You let him fall in your arms whilst he buried his face in your chest. 
“I’m sorry, baby. Mommy didn’t mean that.” you try to convince him, caressing his head. You feel disgusted with yourself because you know this is not the way you wanted this moment to unfold. 
“I’m sorry. I’m sorry, Mommy.” Luke says in between his sobbing. He hugs you tighter whilst in a heaping mess.
“Hush, it’s okay.” you comfort him. “I’m sorry too.”
You let him cry himself out. It may be heartbreaking for you, but you couldn’t think of any other way to help your seemingly helpless child. The only thing you could offer him is the assurance that you will always be by his side when he needs you. 
You know that the overwhelming surge of emotion he’s feeling now is quite new for him. Dealing with his outburst may be tough on your end, but you can’t even imagine how much harder it must have been for a child to be utterly clueless as to why he is crying. 
Swiftly, just like you used to do when he was a baby, you sway your body whilst Luke stays in your embrace. Once Luke’s breathing begins to calm down, you lovingly caress his back; deciding to try again. 
“How are you feeling, darling?” 
Luke doesn’t utter a word. However, you feel him move even closer to your body as if there was any space left. You tighten your hold on him as you place a kiss atop  his forehead. 
“Mommy’s not mad at you, okay?” 
With what you assume is the last of his sobs, Luke quietly replies, “Okay…” 
He breaks away from your hold and looks you in the eye, “I’m sorry.”
You offer him a reassuring smile, “I’m sorry too. I didn’t mean to scare you, honey.”
You plant a wet kiss atop his nose, making him giggle. 
“May I know why you wanted to watch more TV?” you ask.
When you see a hint of hesitation on his demeanor you add, “I’m not upset. I promise. Go on, you can tell me.” 
“Sidney…” 
“Do– Do you miss him?” you ask hesitantly, afraid to hear what his answer might be. 
Your son nods, “Uh-huh.”
Of course. 
Luke continues, “He said… he’s going to play with me when he comes back.” 
“Where is he, Mom? Why isn’t he back?” 
“I…” you struggle. You didn’t know how to tell him that this was all because of your doing. “I don’t know, honey.”
Luke looks at you with his little eyes, all too tired from crying. “Doesn’t he wanna play with me?”
You shake your head, determined not to put thoughts in his head that could be a detriment as to how he saw Sidney. Funny how you still instinctively did things for Sidney’s sake. 
“Of course, he does, sweetheart. He’s just—” 
Your son interrupts, “He’s just what?” 
You caress his cheek as you say, “He needed to take care of some stuff.” 
“What kind of stuff?”
You hum, playing with his hair. “Stuff like what Mom also has to take care of sometimes.” 
You think of an example. “Like, when I leave you with Aunt Claire for a little while, you remember?”
He looks up at you with enthusiasm in his voice when he says, “Aunt Claire always gives me M&Ms.”
You give him a warm and knowing smile. “She does, doesn’t she?” 
Your son continues, “She also gives me candy when you come back.” 
“Yes! See– I always come back, right?” you begin to explain. “Sidney’s gonna come back too, honey. It’s just taking a while. We need to wait a bit longer.”
Luke tilts his head, “Longer?” 
“Yes, right. Can you do that? Can you wait a little more for Sidney?” 
Once again, only with a discernible smile spreading on his lips, your son nods.
“Are you gonna wait for him too?” 
It takes a few seconds before you are able to answer.
“Yes. I am also waiting for him.”
𖥸
Days have gone and your son stayed true to his words. He’s waiting patiently for Sidney. 
In the meantime, Luke has shifted his focus on his art albeit not entirely off hockey given that most of his drawings were of hockey sticks, pucks, and the Pittsburgh Penguins logo. 
You no longer mind for as long as he is, for lack of a better term, distracted. You and Sidney have remained in no contact with one another and it is highly likely to remain the same. You may have kept in touch with Cath and Anna but neither of them gave you word as to how Sidney was doing. Surely, they were thinking you did not really care for it. Did you? 
You sigh, watching your son soundly asleep as he takes his afternoon nap. Days have been quite easier ever since the night you last saw Sidney. But you have to admit, seeing your son’s room now reminds you of him. You would have easily shut down the idea of having Sidney taint the corners of your home with his presence; particularly your son’s room. It would have easily aggravated you, perhaps fuel the hate you have for him even more. How come you don’t? How come what you feel instead is the void in your gut that is melancholy. 
Quietly, you shut the door of your son’s room to let him rest. 
You have been pondering as to how to remedy your situation with Sidney but alas, nothing came close to a practicable and civil reconciliation. You knew full well that co-parenting would be hard given the fact that it was one of the reasons why you chose to be your son’s only parent. You just fell short of realizing how it will equally be as hard on you. As much as you’d give every fiber of your being to be the best Mother you can be to your child, it kills you to acknowledge that Luke needs someone other than you, even more so that it inevitably means him needing his father. 
Perhaps Sidney isn’t the only one who had a hand in everything falling apart. ‘Perhaps’ is a little far fetched but a mere inkling would suffice. You are not yet ready to acknowledge you had your share in the wrongs that make up this little broken family of yours.  
You were putting away Luke’s plushies in his toy bin when you heard the doorbell ring. You place the bin on the floor before you make your way to the front door. It was unusual given that you were not really expecting anyone to drop by. The only close friends you have in the city would not be so careless in doing so for obvious reasons. 
You take a quick glance on the doorbell camera and your heart immediately sinks. 
Of all the people you’d expect to be waiting at the other side of the door, she would be the last one. 
The moment you opened the door you were welcomed with eyes as blue as the ocean back home, hair that is as gold as the afternoon sun, and a smile that’s entirely identical to Sidney’s and your son’s.
Close to losing all the words you know, you were able to say one name. 
“Taylor.” 
She wastes no second, “Is it true?” 
You see Taylor’s eyes wander off to Luke’s toy bin sitting idly near the staircase. The discerning look on her face let you know she no longer needed an answer. 
“Come in.” you say. 
Quiet and unsettling air sits as you invite Sidney’s sister inside your home. You did not really know where to begin. The best thing you can do now is to lead her to your living room, offer some tea, and sit in silence.
“Can I get you anything? I might have some tea lying around.” you say, offering formalities. 
Taylor gives you a tight-lipped smile. Reserved. You get it. You would be too if you recently learned you had a nephew.
“Water would be nice.” she replies. 
You give her a swift nod just as you tell her, “Please, make yourself comfortable.”
You turn on your heels and make your way towards the kitchen with cold hands and a pounding heart. Sitting with Sidney’s sister for afternoon tea isn’t exactly what you had in mind spending your time off work. 
Needless to say, you prolong the trip to the kitchen and back to the living room. You need to buy yourself some time to process what’s about to happen. 
Upon your return, you see Taylor looking at the photo wall you’ve created through the years. The very same one you caught Sidney looking at the first time you invited him over. 
When the two of you catch each other’s gaze, you offer Taylor an apologetic smile. It’s true. You now realize how your new life — your growth looked like through the eyes of your old friends. A harsh reminder that none of them are in it. 
You and Taylor were good friends ever since Sidney brought you to Halifax to meet his folks. You always had a hard time warming up to people you barely know, but with Taylor… well, she made it so easy. 
If only she knew of the things you’ve gone through subsequent to the better parts of your life with her brother. Maybe then, she’d understand. 
The two of you utter each other’s names at once, immediately stopping upon realization. 
You gladly let Taylor know she could continue what she was about to say. After all, you know she has nothing but questions that only you could answer. 
The first thing she asks is, “What happened?” 
You begin to explain. You tell her about the first time you knew you were pregnant, the moment you told Sidney, and how things unraveled shortly after that. You spared her no detail of what has come and gone; the years that flew by so quickly and dreadfully slow at the same time. 
“I didn’t know things were that hard,” she says apologetically, “Why didn’t you tell me?”
“Because,” you pause, “I knew Sidney felt alone.” 
With kind eyes, Taylor replies, “So were you.”
Taylor has always been on your side despite being Sidney’s sister. She knew how difficult her brother can be. After all, she grew up with him. 
You sigh because what she said was true. You and Sidney were alone together. But regardless of the wall that separated the two of you, you didn’t want to let Sidney feel as alone as you felt when he left you. Maybe that’s why you inadvertently left Taylor out of the mess just so Sidney felt he still had someone on his side. 
“At the time everyone blamed him for not wanting a child.” you begin, “I knew that if I told you, you’d feel the same as I do. I didn’t want him to feel that his sister was against him too.” 
“Listen,” she says, “When Sid told me, I swore that I was gonna come up here and be mad at you… but for years, I’ve seen how the game ate up most of the Sid I knew. So I guess, I couldn’t really blame you.” 
“I only did what I thought was the best for us.” you say honestly, “I just didn’t think the repercussions of my action would bring us into this much mess.”
It’s true. The life you pictured with your son excluded Sidney, but you should have known that what Claire told you was right the moment you came back to Pittsburgh with your son. Sure, the first year went by so blissfully. But you have forgotten yet another circumstance you should have known before you dealt another card: Luke. 
Luke is growing up exactly how you dreamt him to be. A boy who has a mind of his own. You cannot really expect him to go along your every plan if he’s already becoming his own person, can you? 
You hate yourself for it. However, you’ll hate yourself even more if you deprive him of something he is entitled to have no matter how much you’re against it. 
Taylor stayed for a while. You spend the time showing her memories you’ve made with Luke. You showed pictures of your son as a newborn, the many birthday parties you have thrown for him, even the ones you have taken of him playing hockey. Taylor savored every bit of the nephew she could get to know. The only thing left now is to finally meet him. 
With nothing but a humble heart you hold Taylor’s hand and say, “I’m really sorry.”
Taylor puts her hand on top of yours, giving it a squeeze. “I understand.”
“Do you want to meet him?” 
“I do,” she gives you a warm smile, “but not when you and Sidney have yet to patch things up.” 
You let go of her hand and sigh. You understood what she wanted you to do. For the first time, you wanted the same thing too. 
“I’ll talk to him.”
𖥸
July has been warming up the city but your words still rang in Sidney’s ears as if it had just been uttered.
“I’m done.” 
As hard as it was to admit, Sidney knew that the article was the final nail in the coffin — the final string that would make him understand why you had to keep his son away from him. Just like all the other times, you were right. He had always been less of a man much like all the others. 
He couldn’t wrap his head around how he managed to screw things up worse than he already had even when he was barely making any progress. Perhaps, it was foolish of him to think he can still make it work. After all, what more remedy could he do to the very thing you have long buried six feet under? 
Instead, what he did was go home to Halifax days subsequent to the release of the controversial article. The last thing he wanted was attention so he did the sanest thing he could think of: renovate his lake shed. 
Apart from the fact that it was the off-season, Sidney could not see himself staying in his Pittsburgh home. The night you ended the attempt to co-parent with him only reminded Sidney of the time he foolishly thought he had already purged out of his system. It was as if he had been brought back to the night he was told his child was gone. 
“Please don’t end us.” he says, knees already on the cold hospital floor. “Please don’t make me leave.” 
Sidney feels your grip on his hand tighten as an attempt to break off his hold, but before you can do so, the door to your room opens to reveal Kris and Geno rushing to take Sidney away from you. 
“Sidney,” he hears Geno call his name. 
He didn’t budge. He wasn’t going anywhere without you. He knew you needed him. He understood what had to be done. A little too late, but he’s here now.
“Y/N-” 
“Sid,” Kris places a hand on his shoulder just as he firmly says, “let her rest.” 
It was the least Sidney could do. To let you be — as he had easily done so when it was the last thing you wanted.
Sidney came back to the hospital with a bouquet of your favorite flowers in his hands. He walked the halls with hope only to find out you were no longer there. He had been cut off as soon as Kris and Geno walked him out of your hospital room — the last time he was ever going to see you. 
He waited for hours sitting on the lobby bench beside your hospital room. If it were not for the next patient arriving to occupy the room, Sidney would not have probably left. 
The days he spent in your shared home haunted him of the days he had left you alone in it waiting for him to come home. The house he had built with his fame and successes have now become a constant reminder of what a failure it really was. 
Sidney sighed once he finished a glass of water. He absent mindedly places it atop the counter as his eyes remained in focus at a photograph placed on his refrigerator. It had been a while since he last saw it. After all, he only gets to go home during the off season. 
He walks towards the fridge and takes the photo in his hand. It was the first sonogram you had of your son. The one you dread having to leave when you finally had the courage to leave Sidney, but the last possession Sidney has of the life he could have been living. 
With eyes now glistening with impending tears, Sidney lightly rubs his thumb on the picture — what was once a tiny little peanut has grown to become a boy Sidney could no longer keep out of his mind. He’s hurting at the fact that he misses you — but his heart aches at the thought of Luke eventually forgetting about him. Sidney knows he’s going to be yet another random ‘Mr.’ at a camp that happened to teach him a sport he will grow up to forget eventually. All those memories Sidney will bring with him to his deathbed will surely be forgotten by the time the tiny little peanut graduates from college. 
Who else could he blame for the life he’s now living however miserable it may be? You offered him this life with your own life on the line. Sidney did nothing but toss it aside because he was set on his ways. He couldn’t blame anyone but himself. Perhaps, that’s what he should bring to his deathbed. 
Sidney’s self-loathing was put into a halt when he heard a chime coming from his phone already buzzing on his kitchen counter. 
He sees a message that almost had him on his knees. 
Just below your name were the words he had least expected but mostly hoped to read, “Can we talk?”
𖥸
As soon as you were able to set a date, Sidney wasted no time and got in the next flight bound for Pittsburgh. Sidney had two days to prepare before meeting you and while that seemed like enough time to be able to think about what he’s going to say the moment he sees you, he could neither ascertain how to explain nor justify his shortcomings. So, he won’t. 
Sidney watches your car pull over the driveway after having opened his gate. After the tedious two-day wait, you were back. Well, at least that’s what Sidney thought at the time. Because unlike him, it was not just two days — it has been six years. 
Sidney was chivalrous enough to let a few seconds pass before he finally opened the door for you although to tell you the truth, he had been at the other side of it long before you rang the doorbell. 
You follow Sidney’s steps as you make your way to the living room. Said walk was not like the others you used to thread on back when you were still together — it wasn’t so long and quiet. At least, it didn’t feel that way.
“Can I offer you a drink?” Sidney asks. The hoarseness in his voice strung along his words. 
Has he been crying that much? His eyes were a bit tired. He hasn’t been sleeping. How come Kris said he was fine? But then again, Sidney has had quite a talent in putting up a facade. You catch him fiddling his thumb. When he sees where your eyes have been, Sidney immediately takes his hand into his pocket. 
You immediately put your gaze elsewhere. “Uh, just water.” 
As you scan the view that is Sidney Crosby’s home, one thing comes to mind: it looks nothing like Connor Mcdavid’s. Sidney’s was far more deserving to be featured in Architectural Digest. To hell with black and metal. This was a home. 
Well, it is. Just not for Sidney.
Even if it was, a part of you knew Sidney would never parade his home for everyone else to see; let alone have it printed on a magazine.
Apart from the wood panels that fashioned the ceilings, everything else was unfamiliar. It was as if you never lived in it. He had new pieces displayed in various corners of the room. Some of it worth millions sitting idly beside or on top of worn out books like some mere paper weight. 
Sidney also redid the floors. Neutral wide plank flooring. You thought that it was quite a bold choice considering the majority of the furniture you had before came in dark tones. But then, that made you realize Sidney also bought new furniture. He also changed a few fixtures, here and there. The white french sliding doors leading to the patio were now replaced with glass doors that had wood trimmings as well as the hallway leading to your old home office that now had interior glass doors. You notice tons of boxes you could see from the other side. Perhaps, he thought it would now be a good use for a storage space. After all, he had to fill in every bit of void you’ve left him with. 
You tear your eyes away from the halls you used to frequent. Instead, you quietly follow Sidney’s footsteps. The house still had an open floor-plan. Sidney loved seeing everything at once. At least that hasn’t changed. 
“Make yourself comfortable.” he says with a tight-lipped smile just as he turns towards the kitchen.
The cloud of uncertainty was still evident and heavy. To top it all, you were neither sure of what to tell him nor where to begin. Clearly, you should have bought yourself a bit more time before ringing his doorbell. 
You hold your bag close to your chest once you’ve sat in Sidney's living room. You were wrong. The changes he made were drastic. His taste then was incomparable to how it is now. The Sidney you knew then wouldn’t be so meticulous as to what type of wood to use in his fireplace or what fabric to pick when it comes to throw pillows lining the couch. Hell, he wouldn’t have thought of having one — let alone five. 
A quiet smile seeps in your lips. It’s nice that something good has come out of such an ugly chapter in your lives.
Your eyes catch a shade of blue and crimson red blankly displayed on the side of the room from where you were sitting. You feel a gnawing guilt resting in your guts as the painting comes into full view. You stand as your hand travels to your chest. It was a piece by Peter Doig called the “100 Years Ago”. 
A man sits alone in a canoe in the middle of a quiet and still ocean. The man looks at you helpless and tired of what must have been an arduous journey. You meet his eyes, as if it were in desperate need of help. Your help. But then again, there’s an island waiting for him — even a house sitting on top of the hill. Couldn’t he just row his way and ask for help? Perhaps his inability to do so was due to the fact that he’d already gone to that house — maybe what it really was is just as empty as what he already had in the canoe.
As the eerily still piece settles before your eyes, you can’t help but think of what it must have been like to be the one that’s stuck. The man that was torn between two distances. To choose between whatever it was sitting before his eyes and the big island he can always call home.
“Hey.”
Sidney’s voice pulls you back to your feet. 
“I’m sorry I kept you waiting.” he says, two glasses of water in each hand. 
“No, it’s all right.” you say. 
“That–” you turn your gaze back to the painting before continuing, “That is something.”
Sidney gives a humble smile. “Thanks. I got it a couple of years back when I started renovating the place.”
It would be absurd to say that Sidney’s house has not changed since the last time you walked its halls. It did change. A lot. After all, you didn’t expect him to leave everything as it was; how you left it. Despite that, there was a little hope that Sidney did leave a bit of what might have reminded him of you untouched. 
“So– listen, the reason why I came here.” you begin, hugging the glass with both your hands. 
“I know. Taylor.” Sidney saves you the need to explain. “I’m sorry I told her. I wasn’t in my right mind the last couple of weeks.” 
It’s true. He knew it must have been hard for you to tell Taylor everything. It was yet another reason for you to cut him completely out of your life, yet another rash decision, yet another failure. Sidney did what he could at the time and his only wish now is for you to understand. He had just lost you and his son twice. To have done otherwise would have made him lose his mind. 
“No. It’s alright. She’s bound to know that she has a nephew.” you earnestly reply.
At this point, you have come to realize that you’ve been insufferable regardless of your own merits. Sidney thought he had lost a son. You couldn’t possibly deprive him of his own sister.
“How– how is he?” he asks, afraid of how he’ll be answered. 
You look Sidney in his eyes just as you say, “He’s been missing you.”
“Really?” 
“Yeah. Really.”
Sidney takes in the new information as a quiet smile spreads on his lips. Luke misses him. 
Seeing Sidney’s reaction brought you a sense of guilt and warmth only a parent could feel. 
“Honestly, Taylor visiting isn’t really the reason why I’m here.” 
His brows quirk and asks, “What do you mean?” 
“I think…” you say, fighting yourself from refusing to tell Sidney the truth. The very truth that you’re still having a hard time accepting.
“I think it’s time to acknowledge– and for me to accept, that my son needs you.”
It’s the truth. It might have been hard for you given that Sidney was the root of it all, but you could no longer put up with the way you have been treating Sidney at your son’s expense. You may still have bits of resentment towards what once was but that doesn’t give you a right to deprive your son of his right. A part of you may still hate Sidney for the pain he caused you, but you could not bear the thought of your son hating his father because of your own doing. 
Sidney is at a loss for words.
“Do you really mean that?” 
He sees you nod. 
You give him a reassuring smile. 
“It’s one thing to keep a father away from his child, but it’s another to keep a child away from his father.”
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logansobsession · 1 month ago
Text
Anything But You Pt. 1
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Ft. Logan Howlett x f! Reader- X-men,marvel
( Logan’s your ex husband, leaving you without any explanation on a Sunday morning. It’s been 3 years since the divorce had been finalized.)
Setting- 70’s Logan ( days of future past)
Contains: fluff, smut!!, talks of miscarriage, age gap, receiving oral and fingering, unprotected piv, alcohol usage, blood, wounds, suicidal ideations
Word count: 5k
Authors note: Hi everyone! I really hope this reads well, as it is my first fanfic!! So please gentle with me. It’s a SLOW BURN, my lord is the ending so VERY worth it!!
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You were once happy. Happy and in love with Logan Howlett. It seemed as if it would last forever. However, one Sunday morning, Logan asked you for a divorce. Nothing was necessarily wrong with your marriage so his desire for a divorce came as a complete shock to you. Even after it had been finalized, you were still in a state of shock and absolute denial. You thought that at anytime now, you would wake up in Logan's arms, nothing but a bad dream. A month after the divorce, you had decided to pack your belongings and leave the X-men, knowing it was best for your mental health if you stayed away from Logan as far away as possible. You found a tiny excuse of an apartment within the city, got a job at the nearest clinic, and eventually a second job at a bar.
This was almost three years ago. Logan hasn't seen you since. Never checked in. He made you feel as if he was a ghost. That he was now. A ghost of your past. Logan seemed to be moving on with what he made of his life, in a relationship with a young woman named Cathy. Of course they met in the only spot Logan resides, the bar.
Things started off as a casual fling between the two of them, then eventually they decided to get serious. That had happened about half a year ago.
Logan was currently at a new bar, one Cathy had suggested since it had always been spoken of in a positive manner. The same bar you had just clocked in for your shift two hours ago.
You had been dealing out various drinks, many to the regulars you grown to know and appreciate the small amounts of thanks you received on a basis. However, you dealt with the rowdy new comers, mainly men in college or early 20's. Hitting on you in verbally vulgar forms at that. But you don't blame them. You were only mid 20's, and considered very pretty by everyone. Your body? Your body could have been turned into an Aphrodite rendition statue. Soft, curves in every right spot, never able to hide from the hungry eyes of men.
You had just finished giving the beer you poured for the gentleman that had just walked up to the bar. A gruff thanks from the man as he dropped a dollar into your tip jar. You rested your hands on your hips, staring down at the counter in slight disgust. Two hours in, and the counter is already dirty. That's always been your personal sign saying that it's going to be a long night for you. You look to your left for the towel resting within the towel holder, bolted into the side of the counter.
You felt the blood drain instantly from your face. No warmth to be found in your cheeks. Him. It's him. After three years, Logan is in the bar you're working at. How horribly convenient. Next to him is what you presume is some new fling of his. You look away quickly, eyes down and glued to the counter and you wipe feverishly.
"Why? Why did he have to come here out of all the bars in this stupid city?" you thought to yourself. Noticing your hands were shaking enough to be seen by an innocent bystander, you knew a panic attack was creeping up the back of your neck. You set the towel down and let your coworker know that a break was needed right this very moment.
You grab the jean jacket you had worn into your shift, since it was early fall, and it's not cold enough for anything heavier. You pull the hair tie from your hair, long healthy hair cascading down your back as you quickly made your way to the back door. Gasping in the cold air, you fish out a pack of cigarettes from your pocket, along with the lighter. You take one more gulp of the bitter fall air, in attempts to calm down before resting the cigarette between your lips. A bad habit you picked up after the divorce, damn Logan.
The wind however, denied you this small relief. The flame being flushed out before it could even flash orange. You stand there, flicking the lighter over and over, cursing at the lighter for not doing you any favors.
Logan did see you. Seen how the blood drained from your face, resembling a ghost. His eyes had widen as he watched you exit the building hurriedly. He hadn't expected you to be here, especially as the current bartender. He didn't know what to feel. Logan hasn't seen you in years, so seeing you now brought back a variety of different emotions. Anger, guilt, sadness, to say the least.
As you continued to struggle to light your cigarette, Logan decides to approach you, against his better judgement. He slowly approached you from the back door of the bar, stopping about a yard from you.
"Need a light?" He asked.
You freeze up immediately, taking your attention away from the lighter. You don't bother looking in his direction, afraid to see Logan's face again. The memories. His sudden departure from your life, at his wishes.
The sigh that came from your mouth reeked of frustration, bristling at the idea of having to actually speak to him. However, you know he always has light on him, and the itch in the back of your throats slowly becomes a scream for the cigarette.
" Damn wind keeps knocking the flame out...... Yeah it would be appreciated." You say as you move the chunk of loose hair from your vision, tucking it away behind your ear.
Logan walked forward, taking the lighter gently from your hand and lighting the cigarette. He hands it back to you. Looking at you closely, he noticed quite a few different things. The way you tucked your hair and the subtle shake n your hands when you moved it. He wasn't sure if it was just a little cold or something else. He decided to just ignore those thoughts for the meantime.
"You started working here?"
He asked, his voice steady but quieter than before. He was trying to keep his tone as casual as possible. You stare at your feet, pulling out a long drag from the cigarette. Your head leans back, meeting softly with the brick foundation of the bar. Closing your eyes, you let out the deathly haze of smoke, enjoying the burning in the base of your throat.
"yeah, I did. About two months ago, it's my second job, still working at the clinic outside of town." You say with a tone annoyance creeping up, not wanting to be anywhere but here in this very moment.
Logan's eyebrows raised in mild surprise when you mention that you were working another job. Though he wasn't that shocked by it, you had always been the type to work too hard. Even back when the two of you were together. He shoved his hands in his pockets, his voice a bit gruff as he said, " Damn, you're still working at the medical clinic? Didn't you take on enough hours between the X-Men and the clinic? You need to slow down a bit. Why you working at this shithole?"
You sigh, pulling the jean jacket as close as possible to you. Wind now nipping at your skin through the jacket. You take another drag from the cigarette before toying with the ends of your hair, still in refusal of of making eye contact with Logan.
" Well when you wanted the divorcee, working so much that way it kept me out of the mansion was a much better option than sitting there receiving pity from Scott and the others, all because I the girl the infamous Logan Howlett decided to discard from his life." You say pointedly, lacing with annoyance.
Logan's jaw clenched when you brought up the divorce. His heart sunk slightly and his hand balled up into fists inside of his pockets at the memory. He kept his expression as stoic as possible, refusing to look emotional in front of you. "You need to get over that." He said in a monotone way, voice quiet but harsh regardless.
Damn. I really hurt her that much, he thought to himself. Though he shouldn't feel sympathy for you, it still hurt that you seemed to be suffering from the way he ended things.
You stop playing with your hair, and look him straight on. Locking eyes with him, you point your fingers holding the cigarette at him. Biting back the bile rising up in your throat, you rudely say "YOU DO NOT get to tell me when and why I need to get over this Logan. You of all people know what abandonment from the ones you love feels like. You still haven't gotten over it, so you have zero room to tell a person to simply get over something." You angrily take the last drag from your cigarette before tossing it to the ground and stomping it. You look back up at him, fire and pain swirling angrily within your eyes " Go fuck yourself Logan." and begin to walk away.
Logan stares right back at you. his expression darkens at your words. Your comment hits him like a stab in the stomach, and it pisses him off but he bites his tongue hard to prevent himself from saying something more. Seeing you crush the cigarette on the ground and begin to walk away, something in him snaps. Maybe it's because seeing you again has brought back so many memories. Perhaps it's guilt, anger, bitterness. Whatever it is, he reaches out and grabs your wrist before you can turn away completely.
You recoil at the touch of Logan's hand around your wrist. Anger seeping out of every pore of your body. "Let go" You say quietly, trying to tug your wrist free from his grasp. You hang your head back, looking away from Logan's face, avoiding any more anger to come out.
Logan tightens his grip on your wrist when you attempt to tug it free from him. He looks down at you, his stare almost burning through your skin. His eyes narrowed as he says, his tone as serious as possible, " No. I'm not going to let you walk away. Not this time."
His voice isn't harsh like it was before. It's steady and more firm, as if he's demanding you listen to him. " Yeah? Let me walk away?" you say with a bitter laugh. " YOU WALKED AWAY!" You raise your voice, letting the wall holding back your anger come down. " You walked away Logan. Not me. I cried for months after you decided you were bored of me. I hope you're so in love with that trailer trash excuse of a woman sitting the bar." You say before spitting in his face. You tug your wrist free from Logan's death grip, and walk away.
Logan stood there and took it. Everything you said and when you spat in his face. If it had been anyone else, it would've ended differently. But instead of reacting defensively or even violently at your action, he stood there and took it, wiping the spit off his forehead. He didn't say anything for a few moments, just watching your back as you stormed off, before he finally spoke.
"We both know I was never in love with you."
You stopped dead in your tracks. The sentence bouncing through your head like someone had just taken a hammer to it. You slowly bent over to grab the rock that sat innocently next to your foot. You stood up, debating if this was a good idea. But in this moment, you didn't care anymore. You turned and threw the rock at Logan in one fluid movement.
"HOW DARE YOU! Never loved you? We were planning on trying for a baby after we lost the first. You can't handle someone that plans to stick around forever. You were scared and still are. Collecting god knows how many women to bring home at night. Leave me the fuck alone Logan because I swear to god if you say anything else, I will get in my car and run you over and over until I can finally be the one to kill the fucking Wolverine." You say before walking back into the car. Tears streaming down your cheeks, you let your manager know that you had to leave right this moment. You snatched your keys up and walked out the front door to your car.
Logan just stood in silence as you unloaded on him with such anger and resentment. Every harsh word that was thrown his way made his heart sink in his chest. He felt guilty deep down for what he had done to you, but at the same time, he didn't think you had the right to react this way. The rock you threw hit him square in the chest, not that he cared enough to react to it. Logan was left alone out in the cold now, watching retreat back into the bar; before coming back out momentarily. He watched silently as you made your way over to your car.
You reach the car door, sniffling and sobbing at this point. You finally get into the car and flick the visor down. Staring back at you was a tear stained version of you within the mirror. Along with the picture of you and Logan. When we were happy, or so you thought. You screamed angrily and slammed your hand against the steering wheel, snatching the picture from its spot and fishing out the lighter from your jacket. You were burning that picture in the car, even if it meant you got burned or worse.
Logan just watched you retreat to your car, still reeling from your words. He was about to walk away and get his bike when he heard the scream. Logan's head snapped in the direction of your car. He quickly scanned you, seeing the picture and lighter in hand. His eyes widened at the sight and immediately knew what you were about to do with it. He didn't think, just acted out of instinct. He started running over to your car as quickly as he could without just straight up using his powers.
You flicked the lighter, releasing the orange hued fire from it. Watching it dance in the wind of your ragged breaths, you bring it slowly to the corner where Logan's smiling face had been. The flame quickly licked at the worn out photo, you stare at it and rub your tears from your face. Logan didn't slow down for a second as he tried to get to you on time. He cursed to himself as he realized he probably wouldn't make it in time.
He couldn't even speak, as he had no idea what he'd say to you. He just needed to stop you from burning that picture for some reason the couldn't explain. As the flame eats away the memory of Logan's face and body, you watch the photo brown before blackening into ash. "Men. They take and take and take. Then leave you and break your heart. That's all they're good for I suppose." You say to yourself while holding the half burnt picture.
Logan was only a couple yards away, but he stopped for a moment when he heard you speak. He looked at the picture in your hand, the image of him being burned away. His face and body no longer visible, only ash remaining. He didn't know why seeing you burn the picture pissed him off, but it did. He closed the gap between the two of you, finally reaching your car. He banged on the window angrily, yelling your name to get your attention.
The banging on your window snapped you out of your trance from the dancing flame. Logan. Of course he can't take a hint to leave you alone. You stare him straight in the eyes, Holding up what's left of the burning photo for him to see. Knowing he will only hear muffled words you still speak " I have had this since the day it was taken. You made it clear, crystal clear Logan. The last part of you is right here and I'm getting rid of it and moving far away."
Logan couldn't help the slight wince he gave when you held up the burning photo. His jaw clenched as he watched the last of it burn to ash, right in front of him. He knew it was already too late to try and salvage it. He didn't want to admit it, but seeing the picture destroyed pissed him off more than he thought. He just couldn't understand why it bothered him so bad. He slammed his fist against the car window again. " Get out of the god damn car and talk to me."
You continue your gaze, staring into the nonexistent soul Logan had. You wipe your hands clean from the ash, letting it sit in your lap. "You can let me leave willingly and go crawl back to trailer trash Cathy. I'm going home so I can pack my belongings ad return to my mother's on the other side of the country.
Logan clenched his fist at your words, his practically cracking from how hard he was clenching. Hearing those words you said just now sent a wave of anger through his body. He took a couple deep breaths, trying to control himself enough so wouldn't do something he'd regret. He knocked on the window again, more irritated this time. "Y/N. Open the god damn door and get out of the car."
You shook your head and laughed in a vindictive manner. " No Logan. I don't think I will. Because what little bit of hope and love that I had for you, you crushed right out of me not even ten minutes ago. I don't care what you want. I don't care about you. I hope that adamantium skeleton crushes you from the inside out." You finish, before turning the key over and pulling the shifter into drive.
Logan's eyes flared anger at your comment. He didn't understand why you were acting like such a brat right now, but it just pissed him off even more. Hearing your last comment actually hurt, but he wasn't going to let you know that. He slammed his hand against the car window, creating a small crack in it. He couldn't stand that you were driving off without him able to say something. He was desperate to get you to listen to him.
You watch Logan's figure grow smaller as you pull out of the parking lot. You grab your phone from the cup holder, dialing your mom's number. She answers and you cry again, explaining the events that just took place, telling her that you needed to move back home. You reach your apartment complex after half an hour, unlocking the door and heading straight for your bed.
Logan stood in the parking lot, breathing heavily and angrily. He watched as your car disappeared from view, still unable to do anything. He wanted to follow you, but he had no idea where you lived anymore. He knew that he could easily track you down, but stopped himself from doing so. Thinking about your last comment kept replaying in his mind as he and Cathy got on the bike. A small part of him felt guilty for hurting you, but he shoved it down. Logan decided going home with Cathy was the only thing he could do to distract himself.
You lay in bed, sobbing with pure anger coursing through your veins. You needed something to do before you ended up hurting yourself or someone else. You stand up and head over to your closet, rummaging in the back. You pull out a box from the very back of the closet marked "Logan." You hoisted it up to stomach level before bringing it over to the bed. You sit down and open the box up, meeting the smiling Logan picture you had taken with the polaroid camera that he had bought you for your birthday one year. "why..." you said softly, allowing more tears to fall.
Meanwhile, Logan was in his hotel room, tossing and turning in bed. He couldn't sleep, even after spending hours trying to distract himself by drinking and sleeping with Cathy. No matter what he tried, something in his head kept nagging at him to get up and seek you out. Logan felt even about everything after sleeping with Cathy. He let out a frustrate groan at his own inner thoughts. He just didn't understand why he was so bothered by what you had said, especially the last part.
You carefully pull out every picture, every little ticket stub, anything involving Logan, out of the box. You throw your hair up into a sad excuse of a bun, staring at everything with a deeper newfound hurt within your heart. "How could he say we were never in love? When everything right here says otherwise....Right?" You say out loud to yourself, in disbelief that Logan would even dare to make a comment like that. "Or was it all just something to pass the time for him?"
Logan had gone back to bed a half hour after walking around the hotel room. He sat up in bed, leaning his back against the headboard. He was staring into nothing but empty darkness, thinking about tonight's interactions. The same words kept running through his head like they were on a loop.
"Never loved you..."
"Never loved you..."
"Never loved you..."
He clenched his jaw again, hearing those words replay over and over, driving him damn near insane. He ran a calloused hand over his face, letting out a frustrated sigh.
Drinking vodka straight from the bottle, you curse Logan's existence. Alcohol was not something you lived off of, like him. Well, at least until the divorce. It was the only common factor in your life, and it helped you sleep at night. Without it, you spent the entire night, tossing and turning. Seeing and dreaming of nothing but Logan's face. Men were never on the table for self discussion after Logan. He was the most perfect man in your eyes. Sure, he had his long list of issues, as did you. But somehow, two broken people, made one whole. So why would you even try to find that again? Just to have a paper trail of heartbreak after heartbreak? No thanks, you'll stick to vodka and lonely nights in this run down shit excuse of an apartment, right outside of the busiest part of the city.
You had discarded the idea of looking through the box anymore, planning to throw it away in the morning when you began packing. Vodka and the hottest bath on Earth would be the temporary solution to a permanent problem, you thought to yourself. After running the bath, you sank down into the scolding heat of the bath. Far enough down that it tickled right underneath your nose. The thought of going under and never coming back up for air was beginning to form easily in the back of your mind with nearly an entire bottle of vodka in your system.
Over at his hotel, Logan couldn't take sitting there anymore. He was jut thinking and thinking about you and everything you had said to him. He finally got out of the bed, careful enough to avoid waking Cathy. He made his way into the bathroom, splashing water on his face and looked at himself in the mirror. He looked like hell. He had dark circles under his eyes and his facial hair was scruffed around in a disgusting way. He splashed more water on his face, trying to get it together and stop the intrusive thoughts that were quickly taking over his mind.
Back at your apartment, you continue dancing around the idea of never having to carry the pain anymore. Taking one large gulp of air, you plunge the rest of your head underwater. Lungs screaming out and burning for air, feeling almost too good for you in this very moment. The thoughts of Logan and the events that took place today swirling through a dangerous storm within your head. The mourning of your miscarriage sending you completely over the edge. You resurface as fast as you had gone down. Gasping for air that you lungs so desperately needed, before dragging yourself out of the tub. You wrap yourself up in a towel before staring at yourself in the cracked mirror. "Alone, broken, miserable, fucking Jesus.. I can't fucking do this any more" you thought to yourself, feeling the vodka getting the best of you. You yell at yourself in anger before punching out the mirror. The start of everything down hill. Anything that could be picked up, was thrown. Anything you could think of, broken or damaged severely. The tears had come flowing again, all the while, cursing Logan's existence and the fact that he came and left so quickly from your life with no remorse.
Logan was in the middle of brushing his teeth, a desperate attempt to make himself appear more presentable than he had since you drove off earlier that night. His head suddenly jarred from the pain that came about. It was a pain that almost hit him like a truck. He dropped the toothbrush out of his mouth, gripping the counter hard enough to hear the porcelain crack beneath his grip in attempts to keep himself standing upright. He grunted quietly, the pain quickly increasing and only getting worse by the minute. In a small moment of clarity, he knew something was wrong. Just by a gut feeling..
You continue throwing things within the four tiny walls that made up your bathroom. Ignoring the raging headache and the blood trickling down your hand from the piece of mirror you had grabbed to throw. You no longer have anything to throw, everything unsalvageable. Leaning against the wall and sliding down it until your bottom hit the cold tiling of the floor. You're still warm from the alcohol, but knowing that you're more than likely freezing from the soaked bath towel still clinging to your skin. You look down at your hand, to inspect the cut you had self inflicted. Clean, precise almost. Something simply superficial that you can mend when you're sober. The last thing you need tonight is explaining to a doctor "Oh yeah, this? I threw a temper tantrum because I ran into my ex and accidentally cut my hand during said temper tantrum with a broke piece of my bathroom mirror."
Logan was starting to get a feeling of intense anxiety and dread, almost as if someone was in danger. He closed his eyes, focusing on it for a moment, trying to figure out what was going on. Suddenly, a realization hit him.
You.
He was feeling something from you. That's the source of the headache he got and he just knew it. He gripped the counter harder, knuckles white before the porcelain shattered beneath the intensity of his grip. Logan didn't know what was going on, but he was starting to panic.
You finally get up from the floor of the bathroom, You stare at the shattered bottle that once held your sweet ticket to sleep. You carefully walk around the debris and out of the bathroom, making your way into the kitchen to the special cupboard. The cupboard that held your ability to sleep and function at home. You opened the door, nothing. Empty as you felt all night. " Great, a fucking alcoholic, just like my ex-husband." you mutter to yourself as you slam the cupboard shut. You definitely were beginning to feel the pain in your hand, a sign that you were not sleeping tonight if you didn't go out and pick up more vodka. You trudged to your bedroom, peeling the towel from your body. You threw on some underwear and a bra, before rummaging through your drawers. You pause, momentarily before grabbing a battered pair of sweatpants. Logan's sweatpants you had managed to steal from him before he left forever. You slid them on and threw a white long sleeve on. You grabbed your jacket once you walked to the living room, slipping it while sliding your shoes on. You lock your apartment door, exiting the building and beginning your sad excuse of an adventure to the nearest liquor store that was 24 hours.
Logan was practically pacing around the room, the headache and anxiety only getting worse. It also felt like he was having a feeling of deja vu. He let out a frustrated curse, knowing he wasn't getting anywhere like this. Whatever was going on with you felt...familiar. And that realization was only making him panic more. Logan mumbled a few words, laced with curses, while throwing his leather jacket and boots on. Stalking out of the room, heading to his motorcycle. He needed to find you and fast before something bad happened...
Stumbling down the sidewalk, constantly brushing the hairs that had escaped from your bun, you tripped an fell. " Fuck....." you exclaim to yourself as you used your wounded hand as a brace for impact. You get up slowly, pain surging through your hands and knees from the fall. The walk to the store becoming much slower.
Logan had finally gotten on his bike, revving the engine and starting it. He took off down the road, heading in the direction he figured would lead him to you. He knew it was a bit of a shot in the dark, but he had a gut feeling and he couldn't shake it. He could start to get a slightly better idea of where you were on the other side, though it wasn't quite strong enough to pinpoint exactly where you were at. Logan was just going to have to drive around until he found you unfortunately.
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I'm so sorry for the drop of guys :(((( But I will hopefully have part two up by tomorrow evening! Again, I really hope you enjoyed!
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