#please dont blindly hate someone

[aquarri]

.

[krisvsthew0rld]

I've been thinking about this while making sandwiches for the last like 10 minutes and i feel like i should just get it out somewhere

(*please* tell me if this needs trigger warnings)

i just played buckshot roulette a little while ago and first off, great game, another one of those rare games that come in randomly and create a conversation a hundred times bigger than the game itself, and in this case, deservedly so! i especially liked the tension of pulling the trigger of a shotgun on yourself *point blank*, it is immense, as it should be, and the best part is that it never gets any easier no matter how many times you end up shooting yourself. but that's not really my point with this post.

the point i wanna make is the response I've seen only once but that worried me a lot nevertheless.

mike klubnika, the creator of buckshot roulette (and a few other great games) is russian. and i am ukrainian. now, i personally dont have a problem with mike just because of that, i know better than to blindly hate people because they're 'the other', plus his games outside of roulette almost universally have themes of resisting authority, and somehow i feel that was not born out of nowhere. which is to say i dont think he's a fan of the Current World Event going on between our countries. (needless to say, i'm also having a fucking terrible time living in war, and am not a huge fan of being invaded by russia. i'm only adding this because this is the No Reading Comprehension website.)

despite that, not too long ago, in a ukrainian art server i joined i saw an offhand comment from one user on someone else's piece of buckshot roulette fanart that worried me instantly, (and that was before i ever really bothered to play BR or look into mike's previous games, so it worries me even more now that i know more about the dev!). the comment went something like 'wow i love the game a lot, but the creator is RUSSIAN >:(' which, yeah that is, again, an offhand comment which didnt have much thought put into it, so why am i getting so worked up about it? because it is kind of indicative of the fact that said person only really hates the creator *because he's THE OTHER.* if they bothered to look into just his itch io page and think about any of the games which are not BR, they might have found that hey, they seem to universally have a message i agree with and one of the games just straight up all but screams 'WAR BAD.'

all that to say, i feel like recently, nationalism has been on a steady rise in ukraine. obviously there is a good reason to be upset, very much so, but going down the road of blind hate is terrible, and only leads to where russia is today - a country ruled over by a senile old man, who blindly hates the country neighboring his own, and who successfully tricked most of his own people into doing the same. that tiny little offhand comment isnt the only one that i've seen that showcases this kind of nationalism but it might be one of the most blind and stupid cases.

tldr: nationalism is on the rise in ukraine and i'm afraid

[sickknotdoom]

destructive praise is worse than constructive criticism.

pointing out the issues of the comic in an attempt to reach the clowns and have them work on it is a good thing, as it ultimately benefits the comic and whatever future creations may be in store. blindly praising everything about the comic despite there being several blatant issues is a bad thing, as the issues will go unresolved and perhaps even worsen, and may bleed into other creations.

plus, if i dont point it out, someone else will, and i cant promise theyll be as tolerant as i am. everyones really lucky this criticism is coming from someone who resonated with the comic, and not some bigot who hates it just because its a queer autistic furry thing.

99% of this fandom is practicing destructive praise. i am practicing constructive criticism. regardless of how brash or rude i may sound, everything is ultimately intended to be constructive. so please learn to take it and learn from it.

[1tsjusty0u]

hm. another. whats zeldas opinion of revali/vice versa?

OHHOHO…….

alright so!! pre cal!!! revali likes/relates to her that expands into likes but also realized they are. Very Different People. and theres some issues about that. he also thinks shes really cheesy + is kind of dumbfounded by her sometimes. for zelda its Finally someone who doesnt like this twerp blindly (the twerp is link), to being, once again, different people but they can agree on One thing at least which depends from situation to situation. they dont argue but more passively disconnect from each other. unless they agree on something! also revali gets the whole powers deal with zelda and gets the struggle and all that jazz. well sort of. he understands the effort and not mastering her powers and the pressure that comes from that. but at the same time. wh. why is she the princess/why does hyrule have this grip if not for her powers. her interest in sheikah tech is probably why shes leading it but . why not an actual sheikah ………. he doesnt mention it mostly but its just a question of ‘why am i following you…’ . revalis american voice actor had that mindset except for link, which i get where hes coming from but i. do not think revali is following orders from link. that would be certain sheikahs as well as some of the guards. also revali is like. a teen to me. but anyways yeah!!! when they first meet they bicker slightly about the divine beasts but ultimately bond of their hatred of link. past this revali Does listen when she talks/rambles about the divine beasts. he doesnt really know how to do Conversation when she does it and either nods along or tries to relate it to something to not just Be Silent and have something to say. zelda sometimes gets annoyed by it but appreciates the effort. they dont really talk a lot save for champion meetings which at some point would escalate into a roadtrip at some point. revali and zelda would both be put off by each others social and rupee status. theyd probably like doing archery together! revalis issues later on kind of start when his opinions on link. dont change because fundamentally its the same just views it at a different angle. so the normal type of bonding is strained slightly. he doesnt know How zelda hates link as in the specific way she hates link not. how could she. thatd be kind of stupid. but like. her thought process. and when his has changed and hers has not he just kind of lies. i dont want link to be the only factor for this either; general things like once again the social statuses of the two and how that’d affect their views, just simply not getting the sheikah tech only really liking medoh, and just. not really knowing how to bond? revali has 0 hobbies. zelda tries to though it is hard when youve got to prioritize your powers. the sheikah tech is just an alternative method For her powers . she may have been genuinely interested in it if she hadnt had to worry about that but its more likely that it wouldve stayed buried. as of right now she Does like it but theres a more. desperate angle to it. shes less doing it because she wants to and more she Has To. plus she’d probably have shame about her ramblings, especially for things that arent Important like the sheikah tech. also she has no idea how to relate to revali at all. she doesnt get the training 24/7 thing and its like. ‘please tell me you do something. fun to do’ ‘ . ‘ . and then for her thered be the thing of when she doesnt hate link. no idea how i’ll make that work (im. Not doing the yiga memory for that one) or how gradually the change happens and whether she just kind of. projects onto him/just acts nicer or both. either way her opinion would have have to had changed from retaliation based on the assumption that link hated her to ‘oj he doesnt hate me.’ trying to make amends. but once that happens she doesnt really know how to feel about link. like on one hand the core issue of him not really being able to emote hasnt changed and cant change really. she has to be able to accept that or just. not care when people Do hate her. self confidence . especially consi

dering link didnt even hate her at first he just . Did Not Emote. gotta accept that people will think their things and move on. i dunno wording it it doesnt feel right but. yeah. anyways once that changes how does she. talk or relate to revali anymore. she doesnt hate link anymore what do they talk about. uh. so yeah! she’d probably try with chemistry and such but its a bit of a dead end. he’d be glad she’d appreciate rito culture and actively asks about things but theyve got to. talk to each other

post cal if revali and the others dont disappear!! he’d be pretty worried over all, and would Not approve of the whole reestablish the monarchy. zelda would uh. while she did in fact miss him and shes glad to see him shes not happy about the questioning of her life choices however she would be happy to see him. i think. gradually she starts the monarchy idea? because at first shes busy with living in kakariko and learning how to fight and exploring sometimes and helping paya and working on the slate/making a new slate with communications. this. this is actually furthering the they leave argument. however if they stay while wreath is doing fuck all then they can stay with zelda. also they could. just simply stay at their own regions and such….. they might as well be alive at this point. Anyways during that time she’d just be happy to talk and train with him. revali would elaborate on things wreath did so she Wouldnt do them (like getting hit by a boulder hypothetically). hes impressed by the machine guns she’d probably make at some point. however i think urbosa and mipha and daruk would take more of a lead on helping her. the same thing of agreeing on that One Thing pre cal would happen here too. but would probably openly disagree on some of the things she thinks during travels. i think she’d get more serious post cal though and he can respect that . more serious as in more willing to talk about things/snap. ts underswap sans is this a joke ruthless route

so basically ! mutual meh. more likely to get stuff done together but i dont think theyd know how to be friends with each other. zelda would Try at the very least its just hard. i dont know how well i explained any of this especially with zelda. also i dont think they could Not be friends its just they have very little commonalities. theyd have to be ok with that. also for more general observations revali thinks shes weird and zelda thinks hes weird firey flaming text the weirdos

[floweryrkive]

honestly, i think cancelling yunjin is so stupid. it's one cup of starbucks.. and buying/drinking starbucks or mcdonalds or anything does not necessarily mean that the person who bought it supports israel. You call her ignorant when ur literally cancelling people over food and other stupid stuff."oh but they support israel!" let me ask you something, is boycotting actually doing something? Theres little evidence on how boycotting has affected anything, and the only thing thats happening is annoying people. I feel bad for the people, and i dont support israel, but its so fucking annoying seeing this happen. Grow up. ive literally seen ppl who supported palestine start hating this whole thing bc of the countless petty and annoying things.

i was thinking about whether i should answer this or delete this because i knew there was going to be someone who would say this exact stuff at one point after i would say i won't be writing for yunjin for now.

let's break it down :

I am NOT cancelling her, nor have i mentioned anywhere that she should be cancelled ( i think cancel culture is a whole lot of toxicity which is another topic) I am merely disappointed in her actions because she has faced this situation before and tell me one thing, if she had faced this same thing before and that time she responded accordingly ( which was deleting the post and apologising actually) would she not know how this would affect her/look abt her viewpoints? Also the fact that Jake from Enhypen ( her co-worker mind you.) apologised immediately after being called out for consuming st@rbucks on live is saying a lot too isn't it?

One starbucks...i can't even think of how stupid this statement is. She's a CELEBRITY. Her influence matters! Why do you think they do advertisements and shit with them?!

It's not just food! It's multinational companies directly funding these terrorist groups that commit genocides! st@rbucks and mcdon@lds are apart of these MNCS! And before you come and say the SK starbucks is not associated with the American one, they are still paying for using the brand name.

No one's claiming she's a zi0nist, but considering the fact that there's literally a hybe boycott going on rn due to them working with 🛵( a very raging zion!st who has literal proof of his support of isr@el as well as messaging pro-palestine armys is very telling) her still buying is obviously going to be showing a lot about her ignorance ???

and don't get me started on boycotting not working because if you lookup on twitter there's enough proof that these companies are pulling strings to literally gain sales that are dropping drastically!

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the main issue comes when this is turned into a fuckass fanwar instead of simply calling these idols out for consuming these products. stop defending her actions when clearly she is aware of everything going on ( she's literally the most online member in lesserafim, she has a coworker who apologised for consuming st@rbucks, there's trucks that are in front of that damn hybe building to urge them to stop working with 🛵) and the people you're talking abt hating this thing are hating it because fans like you are being so tone deaf and blindly defending these idols, turning this into fanwars!

all you had to do was search abt this instead of blindly accepting her actions but instead you choose to come into my inbox telling me to grow up.

i don't mean any malice or hate towards you, but please, look into why exactly people are calling her out, don't lose your moral sense over this. i hope you are able to see the issue soon enough. have a good day.

[rottika]

"autistic people cant/dont like to form close relationships" is just straight up wrong. we struggle with it due to not understanding social norms and having trouble with empathy, but that doesnt mean its impossible, much less that we dont want to. its not contradictory and claiming it is is a big misunderstanding of autism.

in fact, dare i say autism actually worsens the symptoms of BPD? because, since you dont understand social cues, its even harder to know if youre being abandoned or not, and you grow up learning that everyone else has some sort of psychological understanding that you just dont, so youre just constantly wondering if theyre not telling you something.

not only is imagined abandonment much more of a concern, but real abandonment is, too, given most people are much more likely to be turned off by autistic people, due to either not understanding, or straight up being uncomfortable with the way we interact. of course, this is much less likely when your FP is autistic themself, especially if theyre particularly similar to you.

among other things like rejection sensitive dysphoria combining with fear of imagined abandonment, autism is not only not mutually exclusive with BPD, but can make a whole new level of problems when combined. sincerely, someone diagnosed with autism who is on psychiatric treatment for severely impacting BPD symptoms (but whose psychiatrist doesnt like diagnosing in general so bah)

Thank you for this ask! Strong agree!

I struggle a lot with forming close relationships (mostly because of lack of understanding of social cues and general social anxiety), but that doesn't mean I'm incapable or wholly uninterested in them. I have purposely distanced myself from human connection since COVID happened and it's been simultaneously relieving but also excruciating. I simultaneously desire close connections and intimacy, but I'm bad at forming them and (when I DO have them), I'm constantly worried that people will leave me.

It's hard for me to read facial expressions and body language and I tend to assume everyone secretly hates me and wants to leave me all the damn time. It's part of the reason why I was so fucking bad at taking compliments from people seriously and why being a public figure has been so difficult. I am always paranoid that everyone's just lying when they say nice things.

There's this cold, crippling satisfaction that I currently have about not having any irl connections at all (outside of my family). I don't have to panic about being left behind all the time, don't have to struggle through social interactions blindly while worrying they have something to say that they aren't saying, don't have to people-please, won't accidentally hurt people by being aggressive or impulsive. But it's also just very destitute in a sense, yk?

The combination of simultaneously hating people and being an introverted freak (convinced that everyone's out to get me in some type of way) while also wanting/needing people at the same time is a uniquely shitty experience!

Though I'm alone irl, I've had the same FP for like,,, multiple years now and that's been a relief to have him and also another close friend in my online life. They've made my life overall better. So, shout out to those homies. :]

[menalez]

Reading your replies to the other anons re:Singapore I now get why @chaofan1968 and other Chinese users I follow hate your ass and call you sinophobic, you literally told a Singaporean woman who was simply telling you she knew the person being quoted as herald of feminism in Singapore was not Singaporean and was in fact English, that google told you she was Singaporean and that she's not from the UK while anon literally told you she knows this woman you told her that she was wrong and you knew more when obviously you would not know more about someone via google than someone who has actually freaking met this woman, get a grip. She told you the majority of Singapore speaks Mandarin, you said nope not what google says. Says the majority is Chinese, nope not what google says. You clearly think you snapped with your reply to her and that you look sassy and smart but all you look is dumb and sinophobic and self absorbed. I'm Chinese and I will be blocking you before you decide to post a chart telling me how much more you know about Shanghai than me because you're capable of using google, dumbass sinophobe.

sorry next time i’ll take the word of an anon who starts off by acting like singapore is only made up of chinese singaporeans blindly 😭 wouldnt wanna be sinophobic by um. not agreeing that someone not being of chinese ethnicity being automatic proof theyre not singaporeans. malay singaporeans and indian singaporeans dont exist suddenly, the ppl i know of those backgrounds are nonexistent.

please block me 🙏🏾🙏🏾🙏🏾 youre truly dumb to another level

[dangerliesbeforeyou]

omg please do poker face and rings of power. (sorry im sending these two shows to basically everyone but given that i am now mostly a poker face and rings of power blog, i'm contractually obligated)

okok (i'm warning u now that this is gonna be a disaster lol...)

starting with poker face:

charlie? (played by legend natasha lyonne) is an amateur detective who's going on a road trip across america to solve murders whilst on the run from someone for doing something criminal maybe? she's also in a love/hate relationship with a police officer(? detective? honestly idk what job he has... he's involved in the story somehow) who's trying to arrest her maybe? ohh wait also poker? she plays poker really well maybe... or maybe there's no poker involved lol oh god this is just proving how little i observe stuff on my dash pfft....

rings of power (this is honestly gonna be so embarrassing cos i have several mutuals who spent MONTHS talking about nothing but this show lol...):

young!galadriel is... she's there, as is young!elrond, and they're trying to stop ... something... there's a guy with a name i cant remember who may or may not be sauron, and galadriel has a complicated relationship with him (maybe they're former lovers or something?) i dont remember seeing any gifs with hobbits or dwarfs so i think the story revolves around the elves... there's a guy with a Tortured Look in his eye (name is adar? adarin? something like that) and he's imprisoned for some reason maybe? idk people don't like him and he's sad... also everyone's beautiful... that's not a story point, just an observation pfft...

i'm sorrrrry for completely butchering some of ur fav shows lol... both are on my to-watch list so one day i will know what these shows are about pfffft

(anyway feel free to send me other shows i havent seen and watch me blindly try to explain stuff... clearly my brain takes in nothing as i scroll pfft....)

[pretty-little-kannagi]

Please do not make fun of me. Thats about it. For me everything has a place, like shoes are not allowed in the house and only stay in speciffic places. I live by the rule - if its not broken, dont fix it, just like how a chair if it has four legs and it is not broken, you dont need to add 5th leg or break one of the legs. For example there are universal things like cars or cups that can be used for moving people or objects or in the case of the cups you can use it for coffee, tea and water. I hate americans them using the skull emoji on me as if I have said something horrendous for having opinion when I was never allowed to form opinions or criticial thinking and just said yes to everything blindly. It is not selfish and i do not care if it is selfish but people make fun of me which makes me feel worse since I have stuffed down my emotions and never expressed them since people make fun of me and laugh which makes me lash out as a result. I have severe ptsd, anxiety and depression which I take pills for since they ruin my social life and prevent me from verbally speaking which angers other people and makes some even abuse me. I have never cared about sex but I feel the same way about anime and games for girls in the form of dating simulators, if a girl has a boyfriend and he rails her, she is not allwoed to play a dating sim, since her need is fufilled. If a woman has a husbnd and he loves and rails her, her sexual and emotional needs are met, she doesnt need books or anime to satisfy her urges, she literally has an alive human being that cares about her and listenes to her. I have rarely had friends and some boys refused to sit or be near me and always said "thank god she went away" which really really hurt me, it got so bad that despite no longer bieng in school i cry when men/guys are near me since i have been told I am disgusting and ugly and had people throw things at me as if I am a trash can all of my life.

I do not want to ever have sex or try it with anyone since only whores get healthy male attention and guys like whores that scream like harpies and manipulate and not me and I do not even want to be liked, since people treated me like a tumor and bullied me I seem to "fall in love" with anyone who treats me neutrally and doesnt make me cry on purpose or makes me feel afraid or threatened since I have bad emotional regulation/hormonal disbalance and cant stop crying and people took advantage of that, now I am numb and refuse to be near guys since like I said, they only like whores and they creep me out. For me needs have a purpose, and if your needs are fufilled, you do not need to fufill them, its like eating, if you eat too much your stomach will hurt, if you dont eat your stomach will hurt again, and i have to satisfy my self on my own despite hating sex because guys are creepy cruel and suck and I am afraid I will be hated and do not feel deserving of love which makes me hate the whores even more, becuase normal girls are rare and most girls in high school just cursed everyone and hurt them for fun, it doesnt help that i hate parties and am a huge introvert, it hurts hwen someone mentions that my nerdy hobbies are for male attention when the only male attention i got was being told to die and that i am not good for anything and that i am disgusting and at least they are not me and laughing at me and commenting constantly on what i do which made me severely anxious and develop a stutter. If a need is fufilled why do you fufill it? You already have sex? Is your sex life that horrible that you need to take away from someone who literally read erotica in order to not killthemselves because you have actual people to hang out with and verbally be listened to, while no one cared about my problems, no one and I wasn't even hugged or listened to and eventually broke down. High school was hell and I can't move on and small things like criticism or that break me down

Uh-huh. Dunno who this is at all buut I'll set things straight. Keep in mind, I'm not sugarcoating shit or being as kind as I usually am because this ask/rant was pretty much bitching and whining about a lot of stupid shit and I don't have time for that. You're not getting my damn sympathy, not even a damn pinch of it. Straight, honest opinion. Like you gave me yours.

Long post under the cut, trigger warnings for Bullying, pretty privilege, Sexual Assault and sex + a loot of cursing on my end.

I didn't need your damn life story. I never fucking asked for it. I would've been nicer if I asked or if you were someone I knew, but you instead decided to dump this all on me, so here we go. Having a fucking privilege to be pretty like me according to standards is fucking absolute BULLSHIT. It's literal hell to have "pretty privilege" and being afraid of potentially being SAed again or hit on for no damn reason other than "she looks hot and she might sleep with me!" Don't call other women whores for getting the male gaze because you didn't, having the male gaze isn't always fuckin ideal, you know.

I was, you probably didn't guess, bullied. I was bullied to hell and back. Bullied and nobody helped me. Men bullied me, but I didn't hate them. Because they're guys. They're known for sucking ass sometimes. Plus high-school? Can't expect them to act right. Because it's high-school. If you’re still stuck on that and base everything around high-school, go see a damn therapist or something instead of talking to a random girl trying to have fun and have a family on the internet (that I don't have IRL, at least not a good one, mind you.)

I get it, trauma fucks you over, 100%. But you don't put that on others to make yourself feel better, because it makes you look like an absolute asshole, nor can you use your mental illness as an excuse to be an asshat. I have anxiety, and the signs of PTSD and BPD, but I'm not hating on good people or others living their life. If anything, I'm fucking hating the ones hating on others or me for no goddamn reason. I don't delete comments of hate, I respond to them. Not because I want drama, but because I want to protect my FAMILY. I draw the fucking line at messing with the only people who have showed me love and kindness since I was fucking born. You also can't blame all women or say all women are whores. Because you'll be shocked to find A LOT odf women aren't hoes trying to get laid, but ladies living their lives, it is not all about you and your struggles.

And now the final things I will address. Selfshipping/Fictional dating (+fictonal crushes) is a coping mechanism. I have boyfriends (multiple, I'm poly), but I still selfship and hell, so do they. Alexis is a grown married woman who self-ships. Addie self-ships. Selfshipping comforts you, and you can't be mad at people who have fictional crushes or F/Os BECAUSE LIKE YOU HAVE, IT'S A DAMN HOBBY. A FUCKING HOBBY, IT'S A DAMN HOBBY. THAT'S ALL IT IS. You don't get to dictate what people do just because you can't get fucked and those "metaphors" didn't help and just pissed me off more, you were pretty much asking for this rant, "hun".

TL;DR of this post, Your arguments were bullshit and basically you throwing a hissy fit over your life sucking when you basically shit on a ton of people to make yourself feel better, seek some real help if you think it was a good idea to dump all this on someone you don't know, go away and never touch this blog again. Thank you.

~ Sincerely, Angel.

[ghost-hosts]

Hi the anon saying that screamw0rks stalked and harassed someone is absolute bullshite. I'm sorry but if people do not know how to read (they said the musicians were problematic not that they hate them) and that person that went berserk thought the attack was personal. This whole thing is blown out of proportion and you're all blindly just following a well known lunatics enabler on this site

Clarify that last part please. But i will also say ive been friends with andy and i saw all the blogs following them telling them to delete. I can acknowledge people are problematic, but that also means that i can keep using them if i so wish. If you think i need to change im gonna unfollow so that we dont interact and you can feel better about your tumblr experience. Simple.

[florenceisfalling]

Who's rilia I'm scared I follow them idk who they are

s.eptic-d.r-s.chneep but without the periods

[xumoonhao]

to people either blindly defending mingyu or, on the other end of the spectrum, demonizing him...whatever happened to minding your own goddamn business and waiting until official statements have been made? twitter aint a damn supreme court and cant convict people. jesus CHRIST some of yall need to learn critical thinking skills

[alastors-wife]

:/

[feralforfrank]

── LOVE CONFESSIONS IN THE DARK.

BRADLEY "ROOSTER" BRADSHAW X FEM!READER

summary you've been tasked to grab your clean clothes from the laundry room during a storm. little do you know, a certain someone has a similar task.

cw ANGST, but it's the last time. FLUFF. kind of bad writing. storms, thunder, the dark. feelings!!! miscommunication fr, definitely not how the navy operates, but idc. NON-DESCRPTIVE READER. TELL ME IF I MISSED ANYTHING.

note THE LONG AWAITED LAST PT3 IS HEREEEE. im feeling kind of...weird about the ending. i like it, but i dont love it. i hope you peeps enjoy it, though!! sorry for taking so long to write and post it :/

2.3K | masterlist

Sunday noon came around quicker than you wanted it. You'd slept until eleven and elected to stay in bed until it was time to eat. When that time came, you ate Penny's homemade burritos that Nix had sneaked in without the boys seeing.

The two of you ate in your bed and then laid back down. Phoenix was literally on top of you, her hands supporting her head. If Hangman were to walk in now, he'd never let her live this down. Badass Nix with messy bed hair, practically cuddling her heartbroken friend. It was a rare sight.

"I'm exhausted, Nix. I wish I'd never opened my goddamn mouth." You sighed, rubbing your temples.

You were tired. After your confession, you raced back here, flopped under the covers and cried, much like the night before. You wanted to take everything back—every word, movement and facial expression. Rooster hated you, and that was the only way you could get close to him—the hatred—but now you've shattered that wall. 

He doesn't like me. I ruined whatever connection we had. Fuck that stupid mouth of mine. Why did I have to react so poorly both times? He's not mine. I want him to be mine. No. Yes. Fucking hell, this headache. Can't we go back to normal—our normal? That has been your train of thoughts for God knows how long, and it was seriously tiring you out.

"Everything will work out for you. Rooster is full of surprises," Phoenix responded reassuringly.

You looked at her weirdly. "What kind of fucking riddle is that? Have you lost your mind?"

She just laughed, sitting up. "Shut up. I know what I'm saying."

You were about to reply when the screech of the bunkroom door caught your attention. "Oh my God!" Fanboy shouted, closing the door again. "Am I interrupting something?" 

You snorted. "Have you never heard of knocking?" You yelled back.

"What are you doing on top of each other, man?" He sounded traumatised. You giggled.

"None of your business!"

"Whatever, man. I came in to tell you it's going to storm real hard soon. Prepare for a blackout."

"Okay, thanks!" You hear the shuffling of feet moving away from your door and groan.

Phoenix makes a move to stand up. As if she knows what you're thinking, she speaks up. "I'm not going."

"Oh, please, Nix! You know how much I hate it down there! Especially if it's storming out," you whine but to no avail.

"You're in the Navy, for Christ's sake. And it's a quick job. Go in, grab the clothes, and come back. I already put them in the dryer. You only have to fetch them."

You groan but get up as well, blindly searching for your phone and earbuds. If you were going in that dark, scary laundry room, you'd at least do it your way. And who's a better companion than Taylor Swift?

It was early in the evening when all lights shut off. The heater in your room stopped groaning, and you concluded that the expected blackout was happening now. Nix was sleeping in her bunk above you, and you sighed. You'd put off going to the laundry room in hopes of Natasha changing her mind, but there was no way you were getting out of it now.

You really didn't want to face Bradshaw, and there was a big chance you would in the hallways. Unfortunately for you, no one has invented time travel yet, so you're destined to bump into him at some point. You work together, for fuck's sake. It's impossible to ignore him forever.

So, you gather yourself, put a hoodie over your t-shirt with the nearest civilian shoes, and plug your earphones before pressing play on Taylor Swift and blindly find the door. The backup generator is up and running, for the hallway lights are on. 

A few people are conversing and leaning on their bedroom doors. Some greet you with a nod and a smile, and you shoot them one back, ducking your head so as not to be spotted by your friends—who are likely hanging out with Rooster.

You arrive at the laundry room and immediately get to work. There's no one else in here, and it's cold. You feel like a child, shivering in fear as if a ghost will pop up from a corner. The music is blasting, and you're grateful, for the eeriness of this place makes you jumpy. Fuck, it's so dark.

Unbeknownst to you, Bradley was also on laundry duty. He'd put it off as much as he could, even paying Hangman to do it once. He hated the silence in that freezing room and how far away it was from everyone.

So, here he was, trying to walk as quietly as possible; so no admiral ghosts pop up to scare him. Lucky for him, he only had to put them in the bin, press a few buttons and be out of there in seconds.

He's startled when he sees you. Well, he spots your back, but he knows it's you. The unmistakable Taylor Swift tune reaches his ears. Bradley leans against the doorframe, watching as you bop your head and slightly move your hips while you hum the lyrics. 

He chuckles. Your undying love for the singer was the cause for your callsign, although not many people knew that. You made up a story about how quick you're in the air—that's why people call you that. But he knows.

And he loves his knowledge over that little detail about you because it's so significant. Bradley loves memorising things about you—from how you struggle to french braid your hair to how you like Heineken beer more than Corona because you don't like the stupid connection it has to Fast and Furious.

I miss you. The words are on the tip of Rooster's lips, but he doesn't dare say them. He wanted to give you space and time to rethink your words because—surprise, surprise—he's been in love with you for God-knows-how long. And he wants you to love him back, truly, but he doesn't want to freak you out. So, he'll gladly settle with watching you dance to Taylor while trying to hide the fond smile taking over his features.

A loud crack of thunder startles the both of you. The place goes completely black. Bradley moves off the doorframe, but you drop the half-filled basket with a gasp. A soft fuck escapes your lips, and Bradley decides to close the distance between you and help.

His hands look for your waist, wanting to help you up. He hadn't thought about how isolated you were from the world. You don't have time to move away from the hands circling around you, and a yelp escapes your lips when you hit something solid. One earbud falls off in the process.

You fight to move away and swat the person—God, please let it be a person and not an actual fucking ghost—with a shirt. You cry for it to get away, but the arms find your waist again while the person hushes you.

Bradley. It's Bradley. He's holding you tightly, shushing you, and you gulp deep breaths, trying to calm down. Your heart beat fast from what has happened, and because holy shit, Bradley Bradshaw is holding you.

You have to move away—your skin is on fucking fire. So much for ignoring him.

You push him, turning on your phone's torch. "What the fuck, Bradshaw? I almost had a heart attack." You hit him with the shirt you're still holding.

"I didn't mean to scare you. I was here to do my laundry, but the lights went out." He leaves out the part where he watched you dance. "I heard your basket fall, and I wanted to help."

And suddenly, oxygen is no longer making its way to your lungs, and your whole body is tense. Bradley is right here, in front of you, staring at you with his hands on his hips. And he also knows how you really feel about him. He has to go now.

"You, uh, you can go do your thing," you stutter, pushing your hair out of your face, your eyes never finding his. "I'll finish this on my own."

"No." It's nothing but a statement. "I'm not leaving you all alone down here."

Your heart warms, and the corner of your mouth lifts oh-so-slightly.

"Aren't you doing your laundry?"

"Fuck that. I'll do it tomorrow."

"Alright." You get back to picking your clothes out of the bin.

The silence between you lies somewhere between tense and comfortable. You feel at ease with Rooster here, knowing that no harm will come to you before him, but you can't help but feel awkward since he knows about your feelings now. The lights turn back on, and you have to make your blush disappear before he notices.

You ignore how your stomach turns—butterflies and anxiety—and close the washing machine bin's door when you finish. Well, you at least try to. The door won't latch, making you look like an idiot pushing the washing machine for no reason.

"Here, let me help." Oh my fucking God.

Rooster is hovering above you now, his hand replacing yours. He pushes the machine's door hard, and you hear the satisfying click. 

You can feel his breath down your shoulder, but you try not to tense. Your head spins to him involuntarily, and your eyes meet his. Your eyes fall from his eyes to his lips, and he does the same. Oh my God. Does he want to kiss you?

Your question is answered three long seconds later by him crushing his soft lips onto yours. It's like how all those novels and poets describe it. Instant fireworks. Your body tingles, and your heart pounds so hard that you think it'll rip off your chest. His hand encircles your waist, and you tighten your hold around a random shirt.

He's doing this out of pity. And just like that, the dream you've had for God knows how long is shattered by your own thoughts. You have to pull away.

"W-We can't do this, Rooster."

Your eyes meet his as you touch your lips. They're tingling, scratch that, your whole body feels like it's been electrocuted. He looks hurt and confused as he pants a few feet away from you.

"Why?" It sounds so sad.

"B-Because you don't like me, Rooster. I know you hate me, but I don't want something I've dreamed of for so long to get destroyed because of your silly antics." You sound even sadder.

"Is that what you think?"

"It's not a thought, Bradshaw. I know it. I've seen it with my own eyes." Tears have gathered in your eyes. Fuck, those mood swings.

Bradley exhales deeply. "I don't hate you, Swift. Never in my life have I felt what I feel when I'm around you. I feel all hot and tingly when you walk past me. My cheeks burn like a kid when your comments involve my love life, because deep down, I want you to be the protagonist of my fantasies, not some random girl I met at the Hard Deck.

Your jokes and your talent, your wit and your beauty—I love them. Your charm and ability to persuade everyone into doing chores for you are my favourite. I love listening to you talk, sarcastically or not, because you always have something to say.

Do you know how many times I've eavesdropped on you and Phoenix so I could learn more about you? I know about your hatred for Fast and Furious movies, your obvious Taylor Swift adoration, and the one time you got hammered and thought you were talking to her. 

I love knowing all those details about you, and it's not because I can use them against you. They're what make you...well, you! You're nothing like the girls I've met in my life. You're extraordinary, and I..."

He hesitates.

"Is this...Did Natasha put you up to this? I swear I don't want your pity and fake love confessions, Bradley. You don't have to pretend to be in love with me—"

"But I am! I am madly in love with you. The kind of love that is so dangerous and—and so crushing. I want to be with you every second of the day, annoy you, and make you smile. It's all I've ever wanted for years now."

Your eyes are wide and glossy, eyebrows raised in shock and confusion, and so many emotions. 

"I love you, Swift," he confirms.

"Prove it." Your words are merely a whisper.

Despite the hard rain and thundering outside, your voice is the only melody in Bradley's ears. And he doesn't hesitate. He crushes his lips against yours again, this time with hunger, passion, frustration and love. You kiss back with just as much force, but before you know it, you're pulling back, gasping for breath.

Bradley's hands are cupping your cheeks, and his forehead is touching yours. Your breaths mingle as you stare up at him. Your fingers grip his shirt tightly. 

"Is that enough proof for you?" He whispers.

You lightly shrug. "I still haven't forgiven you for almost calling me a slut." That's a lie—you have. You forgave him as soon as your head hit the pillow yesterday. He didn't mean it.

He sighs a long, sad sigh. "Please, let me make it up to you. I was a—a jerk. A complete and utter idiot. I don't deserve your love, but please, I need it. Give me a chance to prove how much I love you." Your heart clenches, and a smile tugs at your lips. 

"You can make it up to me as long as you want, Bradley Bradshaw."

He smiles back, and you think; this is it. This is heaven on earth. Bradley Bradshaw—the man you've longed for so long—smiling at you with nothing but adoration. You're heart feels light and free.

You don't want the moment to end.

[tokyo-daaaamn-ji-gang]

Sanzu: *focuses on keeping Mikey on the path to literal hell, encouraging murder and illegal shit*

Sanzu: YOU DONT UNDERSTAND, HE CANT BE HELPED. *keeps stabbing* SOMEONE THINK OF MIKEY, PLEASE!

Stop it. Go back to your place under the motorcycle.

(Please note I don’t actually hate sanzu, his logic and feelings are just a little frustrating bc I’m rooting for Mitchy lol)

Lmao so true though, Sanzu seems to just blindly believe in destiny and as far as we know hasn't tried to change it.

[hqcult]

SWITCHING POSITIONS ## akaashi keiji

doms and subs are overrated. it's hella fun being a switch and keiji couldn't agree more.

. tw smut, switch! akaashi, switch! reader, some baby girl and baby boy calling, mommy kink, sir kink, drunk sex, unprotected sex (dont try this at home), oral (m receiving), creampies, slight degradation . wc 3.8k

the night is young. as young a night gets for two college students after finals week. while countless people from different frat houses have already invited you to come to their year-end parties, you never really enjoy that scene. it's too much of an effort to dress and doll yourself up when, after such a stressful week, you just want to wind down and get drunk here in your dorm with your best friend. 

plus, keiji tells way more compelling stories than boys you've encountered at parties and that's saying something, considering you had been drunk as a skunk but didn't find them funny at all. 

yeah. offense.

right from the get-go, you figure he's never one for small talk but there's a fondness in his eyes when he talks about his days as a volleyball player. he becomes more loose-lipped, sharing to you memories of his teammates and games. you really didn't care whatever topic he chose to talk about, you just know you'll listen to him anyway. it's great listening to him talk with that comforting voice of his. 

"you know," you lean your head back against the couch, cozying up in your hoodie. "maybe you should start a part-time job as a youtuber. you can be one of those people who do asmr videos or something." you chuckle, finding the random thought amusing. 

"but i'm already on a full-ride. i don't think i need to get a part-time job," he lies comfy on your couch. one arm hanging, hands over the can of beer. 

you sighed staring up at the ceiling. "lucky. it's hard maintaining grades when your professors are a bunch of snobby assholes who don't care about their students."

his knee nudges the back of your head lightly. "don't say that," he scolds. "that's bad. they're still your teachers."

always so polite.

just as you reach forward for another slice of pizza, akaashi speaks again, eyeing you thoughtfully. "well… maybe i can start an asmr channel and we can split the money i earn."

you laugh, torso turning around to face him. you bring the beer can up to offer a toast. 

"see, this is why i love you, keiji."

after clicking his can with yours, you turn around to have a bite of your pizza — completely missing the red flush on his cheeks, thrown off-guard by the strong proclamation you just made, albeit he knows you probably meant it in a platonic way. he didn't know what to say next so he took another swig of his drink. 

he doesn't know. really. what triggered him to look at you as something way more than a normal friend would. for someone so self-aware as him it's frustrating not knowing how and when his feelings for you even changed. because the only time he realized he was knee deep into liking you was when he was also at the brink of losing you. 

which reminds him… 

"what happened to that guy you were texting two weeks ago?" he asks. 

"ah, him? he's too… what's the word, assertive? intrusive? i don't know — it's like he wants to monopolize my time. like he wants my whole world to revolve around him and it's… kinda creepy actually."

akaashi scoffs, sitting up to get a slice of pizza. "you guys were only talking for two weeks."

"i know! that's what i'm saying!" you say, hands wildly gesturing to and fro. he's afraid you might spill the beer. "like — dude. maybe it's either he needs to chill the fuck out or i'm just not into doms. or maybe he's a walking red flag."

he hums thoughtfully, slumping next to you on the floor before dusting his hands off from pizza crumbs. "he's a red flag. obviously."

"okay but random thought: doms are overrated," you reach forward to open another can of beer, thinking out loud. "subs too. i feel like it's kinda tiring being a top as much as it is being a bottom. being a switch, on the other hand, is like getting the best of both worlds and who wouldn't like that? it's some good hannah montana shit."

now akaashi keiji can't help but laugh at that. "are you drunk? how did our conversation end up this way even."

you bump his shoulder, laughing with him before drinking your beer. "oh, come on. humor me a little, keiji. think about it. i'm right. aren't i?"

"and how do you know?" he turns his head towards you. "have you been a top? or bottom —"

"i have," the smile you gave him sent butterflies to his stomach. "both. back in my all-girls high school. being a bottom's not too bad but… eh, still. i'd rather just be a switch. it's exhausting to top all the time."

"don't i know it," akaashi mutters under his breath. flashbacks of all those awkward and embarrassing endeavors filling his mind. "guys are always expected to top. it's like a stereotype. can't i just sit back sometimes and follow orders, too?" 

he feels the heat crawling up his neck and it makes him shrug off his jacket, leaving him with the plain white shirt underneath. 

"i can give you orders."

akaashi almost chokes on his beer. 

"you literally just said it's exhausting to top."

you shrugged. "yeah, but — i mean, it is! it is but… you know."

he can see exactly how embarrassment is taking over your features and he wants to stop and move on from the conversation. he wants to. he should. but there's an inkling feeling inside him that doesn't because he wants to see how this unfolds. his heart is beating erratically and he can't take his eyes off you since that little comment you made. 

"i'm sorry," you chuckle, a dismissive tone in your voice. "nevermind. anyway…"

akaashi shouldn't entertain his thoughts. 

it's improper. you're his best friend. literally one of the few people who he's managed to befriend in college. he can't lose you. he can't risk being awkward with you. his not-so-platonic feelings for you should never get in the way of that. never. plus, you're both intoxicated right now and you were probably just kidding around. akaashi isn't that kind of guy. he respects you. he should dismiss the conversation but —

"then give me orders."

you froze. eyes widening as you stare at the forgotten netflix movie playing on your laptop, unable to look at the man sitting next to you. afraid of the weight of his stare. you didn't know why you blurted out whatever you did a few seconds ago but you never thought he'd entertain it. not that you mind, anyway. this is your best friend we're talking about. well-mannered akaashi keiji with the ocean eyes hiding behind those cute square glasses. 

the akaashi keiji you've been crushing hard on since you saw him at the freshman orientation two years ago. 

"would you… spread your legs for me?"

light rustling can be heard as the microfibers of his socks drag against the carpeted floor. just as you reach forward to push back the coffee table, akaashi beats you to it and does it for you. making sure to push it far so you won't accidentally hit your back on the edges. 

with one smooth swing of your leg, you're sitting snug on his lap. the rough fabric of his jeans grazing your thighs as your hands tremble whilst dragging down the planes of his torso. 

akaashi grabs your hands, stopping you. 

"you look hesitant. you don't need to do this if you don't want to." his tone is low, understanding as always. 

you look at him straight in the eye. leaning forward until your lips are all but grazing each other as you spoke. "i want to. i want you."

you dive down to start peppering kisses down his neck and you hear him let out a shaky sigh. you lick a stripe up the side of his neck before kissing the shell of his ear. "go on, keiji. you can touch me. don't you want to touch mommy?" 

you feel him shudder, his dexterous fingers mapping random lines underneath your hoodie, slowly raking higher and higher until he's saying "mommy, please take it off" in low hushed tones. the blush in his cheeks prominent as he can't seem to stare at you in the eye. so cute. so submissive. so stupid thinking you'll let him undress you so easily.

"did i say you can take it off?" you hiss, reaching down to cup him from over his jeans and shoving his hands off you. "don't tell me baby boy is being bad, are you being bad? i thought my baby keiji's a good boy for his mommy." 

"but… but i am a good —"

akaashi hisses, knees jolting when he feels you tracing circles on the insides of his thighs with the tip of your nails. for someone who just claimed they didn't like topping, you're doing an impeccable job at it and he doesn't know whether or not he loves it or hates it. when your sneaky little hands unbutton his jeans and teasingly pulls the zipper down, okay, no, he definitely loves it. the determined look in your eyes as you pin your gaze on his features, watching like a hawk at every furrow of his brow, of every sharp intake of breath, every time he throws his head back. 

"if you're such a good boy why don't you strip for mommy, hm? won't my baby boy give me a show?" he can't take his eyes off you as you smile, sultry, leaning over to lick at his bottom lip as your ass slowly grinds against his jeans. how merciless you are, when you gave him a peck and pulled away. "go on. strip and sit on the couch."

blindly reaching around the coffee table, you grabbed whatever beer you can hold before raising it up to your lips and staring at him over the rim of the can as he throws his shirt off. you suck in a breath when his abdominals come into view. his torso lean and smooth, siding a little more on the petite size with a tiny waist. and you shamelessly check him out even more when he leans over and hooks his thumbs under his jeans, pushing it down. 

you didn't speak until you saw the black waistband of his boxers.

"those, too."

he pauses, looking a little lost. "i'm sorry, what —"

"everything, baby boy. i want everything off… including those boxers. wanna see your dick throbbing. bet baby boy's already hard because mommy kissed his neck and gave him hickies, isn't he? bet you'll love it if mommy licks you all over, or when mommy rides her baby boy's cute thighs. would my baby keiji like that? would you? does my baby boy deserve it?"

damn were you good at this. the more you spoke the more it's making him ache and he wastes no time in shoving everything down. true to your words he was throbbing. the mushroom tip oozing precum and his dick standing tall. maybe it's the alcohol in his system or maybe it's the desire for you that he had kept locked away for so long, but akaashi can't bring it in himself to feel embarrassed. not when you're looking at him like you want to devour him whole. 

the same bright eyes of his adventurous best friend who's stuck by his side since being wide-eyed first years in this huge university — he'll probably never see you in that same halo ever again, already tainted by the image of you now. 

he sees you swallow, eyes never straying away from his girth and akaashi feels a little proud to have you looking star-struck. when you rise from your seat, his muscles tense in anticipation, staring at your hand as it slowly reaches forward — only to pause mid-air. 

akaashi looks up at you questionably and he sees the unspoken question in your eyes, asking for his consent. and your baby boy's answer was instantaneous.

 "please, mommy. touch me?"

the smile on your face was cocky. definitely cocky as your hand wraps around his girth, the other wrapping around his throat as you coo. "aw, how can i resist when you're asking so nicely? why don't you sit on the couch and i'll grant whatever my baby boy wants, hm?"

he mewls, leaning back on the couch and eyes you with lust. "like this, mommy?" he mutters, desperate. he even tilts his hips up a little to offer you a better view as you hum in approval, straddling his hips as you stroked his cock. 

"such a good boy for mommy, aren't you? how pretty." 

he hisses when he catches sight of you kneeling before him in between his legs, looking at him with the most captivating sultry gaze he's ever seen. "mommy's gonna give you a 'lil prep, yeah? so it won't hurt when i ride your dick, baby boy." 

"yes, momm — ugh." 

akaashi throws his head back when you finally wrap your lips around him. the image of your hollowed cheeks forever ingrained in his mind. his eyes fly close, focusing his attention on your swift tongue as it lies flat against the underside of his cock, taking him eagerly from the base to the tip. your tongue swirls around the head, sneakily poking around the hole where precum oozes out. 

"mommy," he whines when your tongue travels back to his girth, tracing one of the prominent veins in his dick before your hand comes up to play with his balls. "mommy — shit. so good… feels so good…"

it urges you on, hands retracting to wrap around whatever your mouth couldn't cover. his back is arching and you suck him with fervor, eager to push him to the edge, to make him believe you're going to lick and play and suckle until he's creaming around your mouth — only to pull away at the last minute. 

"no!" he moans, looking down at you desperately as you rise from your seat. "i was-i was gonna cum!"

you dismiss him easily with a wave of the hand, too busy shuffling out your clothes. maybe if you had the energy, you would've punished him a few rough spanks but you were far gone already. thoughts of that dick splitting you in half as you ride him consuming your mind like a plague.

akaashi groans when you hop onto the sofa and crash your lips on his. you never would've imagined kissing him this way. sloppy and wet and painfully induced with lust. the stretch is amazing, there was the lightest stinging sensation but was overridden by pleasure. he groans, pulling you close and peppering your shoulders with kisses. 

you grabbed his shoulders and started bouncing on his lap in a slow, stimulating manner that made you feel every vein and curve of his cock as it deliciously drags against your walls. you hear him wine. you hear him talk about how it hurts and how he can't take it anymore. how he needs his mommy to move faster. faster, mommy. please fuck me faster. but you ignored him, so caught up in domspace to see the growing irritation in your baby boy's eyes. to see the sudden shift from clinging onto you so desperately to gripping possessively against the soft flesh of your sides.

the air was knocked out of your lungs when he slams you down on the sofa.

"you dare ignore me?" his face is passive, eyes cold and steely as he pinned you with a dark stare. "time's up. i think you got a tad bit carried away there, don't you agree?" 

"want me to show you how it's done?" you shiver in excitement when he takes your wrists in one hand. his thighs flex as he gets on his knees before hooking your legs over his shoulder, thrusting his dick deeper into you. akaashi bends forward, a hand firmly gripping your face. "i want you to address me as 'sir' and nothing else, do i make myself clear?"

his low assertive tone so painfully attractive you clenched around him as he drills into you with vigor. akaashi chuckles, the low rumbles of his chest stimulating your perked nubs as it grazed against him with every thrust. "yeah, you like that? like it when i speak to you like this? ah, fuck you're so tight. you're pussy's practically choking my dick — look, fucking look, baby girl."

your head grazes his as you both watch his member disappear inside you, getting off at the lewd sight of the glistening sheen of your essence wrapped around his cock and the loud squelching noise it makes when he rams it into you again. you whimper, pulling akaashi down for a kiss as your ankles hook around his back, pulling him deeper as his pace quickens and his balls slap against your skin.

"see that? your pussy keeps sucking me back in. bet you're desperate for my cock, aren't you?" you never thought akaashi to be the type who's into talking dirty, you thought he was the gentle, vanilla type. but alcohol always brings around quite interesting things about a person after getting drunk. 

you cling onto him for dear life as his hand reaches down to draw figure eights against your puffy clit, eliciting the most feral of moans from you that could rival that of pornstars. "sir," you shudder. "please, sir. please."

"please what?" he grabs your lower back, pulling your torso up to hit an angle that makes you see stars. 

"please, let me cum! please."

akaashi clicks his tongue before raising a perfectly plucked eyebrow. "you didn't listen to me when i was the one begging, why should i listen to you?"

your hands wrap around his neck, sobbing against the crook of his neck by the sheer pleasure you felt. he can't understand your mindless babbling. all inside keiji's mind is the feel of your perked nipples grazing his chest and your plush walls wrapping around him so prettily. he never did it raw, having you as his first time doing it without a condom pushed him way over the edge than he wants to admit. 

"be-because — ah — i didn't —"

akaashi hauls you up into a sitting position, arms wrapped around you securely as you straddle him. he yanks you away from his neck, a tight grip wrapped around your throat as he stares straight into your eyes as he fucks up into you, feeling his balls slap against your skin. "what? cock's that good you can't even speak?"

he feels your hips stutter as you sob, tiny hands wrapped around his wrists. you didn't even try bouncing and meeting his thrusts anymore. "sir, please! s'too much! wanna cum —"

"then fucking work for it," he stils his hips. "fuck me back, baby girl. come on. you said you wanted to ride me, didn't you? bet this is what you've been thinking about for the whole night. that's the only thing my baby girl's capable of right? thinking 'bout my cock and nothing else? such a dumb little baby."

your legs quivered and shook as you obliged and pulled yourself half way up, before meeting him halfway and impaling yourself back down his cock. the first time you did it had both of you whining, akaashi quickly threading his hands through your hair to yank your face towards him. he wants to imprint this memory into his mind. to be able to merely shut his eyes and be transported back to the night you both were intoxicated and you let him use your cunt like a fleshlight. 

all sense of manners were thrown out the window as his ocean eyes memorized the way your eyes rolled back when he hits a sweet spot, the way your nose scrunches when the pleasure becomes overwhelming, the way the drool shamelessly trickles down the side of your lips as your tongue sticks out and he so badly wanted to spit but he didn't in fear of making you uncomfortable. everything. he wants to memorize everything. 

"just a little more, pretty girl. you can do it. together, okay? cum before me and you'll fucking regret it."

he grabs you closer, burying your face in his neck and planting his feet firm on the ground as he pistons his cock into you. it's not the heat of your body, or your pretty cries, or the lewd sound of skin slapping that made him cum. no. it was your sheer desperation and vulnerability as you bit his shoulders and yelled at the top of your lungs. 

"keiji!"

he pulled out at record speed and had made a mess on his torso but he was hardly able to register any of these. so fucked out and sated and content to have you sitting on his lap as he stares at your plain ceiling. he doesn't even realize you've dropped down to your knees and started lapping up the essence splayed on his torso until he felt the hot muscle of your tongue. "(y/n) —"

"what happened to baby girl?" you tease, a playful smile on your lips as you meet his eyes. "you were so into it, 'kaashi. you should've seen your face — well, i was… kinda into it too, anyway."

it took akaashi around three seconds for everything to finally sink in, to fully sober up and let the gears work in his head. the realization of what had gone down on your sofa, of the things he told you, brings about an embarrassment greater than anything he's ever felt in his entire life. suddenly, he's shoving you away from him and draping the discarded blanket around your naked form whilst politely looking away. then he quickly covers his soft dick with one of your throw pillows.

"oh, my god. i'm so sorry. this is a mistake — shit — i'm sorry! you see, i've liked you ever since and not as a friend and i swear i'm not the type to just —"

"keiji" you snap him out of it. "i like you too, okay? now don't go around saying it's a mistake or i'm going to throw you off the roof. do you want me to throw you off the roof? right. i don't think so. now, come on! get your sexy ass dressed, we're going somewhere."

"where... are we going?"

"i'm craving ice cream. so for our first date, buying ice cream at 2am!"