#please don't ask what this is I genuinely have no answer for you

[genderqueerdykes]

I'm the same anon that sent you that ask asking about why man hating isn't considered progressive. I want to reach out and apologize that the "why man hating isn't considered progressive" disturbed you. I didn't mean to pose any harm to you at all. But I really appreciate you answering my question and the other people who added to that post. I'm going to be honest, I kinda worded that particular sentence every badly, and I wished I worded it differently.

I really apologize for making you disturbed by that sentence. I really like your blog, and all your posts have been very informative to me. Please keep up the good work.

it's okay, you don't have to apologize for that! i appreciate that you took the feedback sincerely. i just wanted to point out that people can be needlessly ruthless toward men without realizing it, and i'm glad you were able to pick up on that with ease. you're doing a good thing asking questions! that's never a bad thing. i genuinely appreciated the question as opposed to those who just yell at people or talk over them

we can work toward a kinder world. it's in our grasp, we just have to let it happen. you do not have to apologize at all, i was just pointing out how it can make others feel, not just myself, and you took that to heart, so thank you! much appreciated you did no wrong and i'm not personally offended. i just like to point out where wording can be harsh when folks may not realize it. and also, i'm never expecting anons to have 100% perfect verbiage on stuff because i screw up, too. i use the wrong words and accidentally imply the wrong things. i'm not immune to it, either. it's something everyone does. what's important is recognizing when it wasn't helpful and learning to move past that

thanks for stopping by again! i greatly appreciate you :)

[waveofthot]

-License, registration, and phone number?-

Timeskip!Daichi x Reader

Warnings: None! All fluff!!

It was late and you had just finished work. You were eager to get home and with an empty road you were speeding just a little bit... I mean...it couldn't hurt could it? No one would even know?

It went like that for a few minutes until you noticed lights behind you, only to look in the mirror and indeed see a cop car. Shit. You pull over.

.

.

.

Rolling down the window, you place your hands on the steering wheel, before leaning back in your seat with a sigh. Of course, the one time you speed you pass by a cop. Typical.

"Do you know why I stopped you today, ma'am?" He asked. You already knew he would though, standard procedure after all.

"Yes Officer...I'll grab my license, registration and proof of insurance." You honestly just wanted to get this over with, there was no use in trying to get out of it. As you look for the items you hear a slight chuckle. "Mmm... Thats fine too, but I'll do fine with just your phone number..."

You stopped your rummaging to register what he said before you whipped your head around. "Officer, I don't think that's appropri- Daichi?" You finally got a good look of his face, the shame you felt replaced with relief.

"Sorry sorry, I recognized your license plate from way back then and I didn't know what else to do." The smile on his face was genuine, yet still a bit shy. It sent you back to your highschool days.

You finally got to take a good look at him. His face had matured, still the same old Daichi that you knew, but older. You're face flushed a bit as your eyes moved down. He had bulked up quite a bit, somehow he'd become even hotter then he used to be. And then you remembered what he had asked you not too long ago.

"Wait a moment, you wanted my number?". He rubbed the back of his neck, the dark of the night helping to conceal the pink coating his cheek. "Yeah... To be honest I wanted to ask you back then too, but I was just too scared to actually do it. I mean- if it's alright with you ofc. Consider Officer Daichi off duty...right now I'm just...Daichi..."

Definitely the same Daichi you knew back then... A soft smile rested on your face. The tiny crush you had on him seemingly reigniting as if no time had gone passed. "Here, give me your phone." You said, holding your hand out.

Despite him being the one to ask you in the first place, his mouth hung open in an 'O' shape, before he quickly unlocked his phone placing it in your hands. You punched your phone number in before calling it and handing the phone back to him, then pulling out yours which was now ringing. Answering the phone you held it up to your ear before looking back at him. "Hey there!"

His face burned up before he replied back with a quiet "Hi..." Before you hung up. He cleared his throat looking away before looking back at you again. "Thank you... Umm I'll call you tonight?"

You nod. "Please do!". He smiled at your eagerness, and the both of you wrapped things up. When you got home, you laid in bed with your phone in hand, excitedly waiting. Some time had passed before...

*ring ring ring*

*click*

"Hey Y/N..."

˗ˏˋ ★ ˎˊ-

Hello my lovelies!! New fic for you all <3

I've had this idea sitting around for sooooooo long you have no idea ♪⁠～⁠(⁠´⁠ε⁠｀⁠ ⁠)

I hope the writer's block keeps staying on hiatus, cuz writing is soooo fun and I have so many ideas.

I'm thinking of either writing jjk or genshin next, idk tho, I'm open to suggestions !

[lemotmo]

Love love love this. Please share your thoughts as well! I don't know if you received the same question or not but I would love to know how you would answer this ask as well!

Q. I have two questions. My first question is do you think they would ever go down the unrequited love route for Buddie? One of them admitting they're in love with the other but the other not feeling the same way. The second question I have is with the benefit of hindsight and knowing what we now know is there anything you wish you had done differently during the hiatus between season 7 and 8? Do you wish you had handled yourself differently or done anything differently?

A. They will never make Buddie unrequited. They won't introduce the idea of a relationship only to have one of them rebuke the other. It happens in real life, it sucks, but it does happen. The problem with doing it on a television show though is it makes the character who doesn't feel the same way the "bad guy" in the other characters story. Please understand that they would in no way truly be a bad person but for the audience it's a sticky situation. It would also be an absolute failure of a choice from a business standpoint. 911 is kind of in rare air where Buddie is concerned. There is nothing else like them on television. There is no other same sex pair you can point to in the history of television who can do what 911 has the potential to do with them. A genuine queer slow burn endgame. It has never been done. Never. I don't believe they were always the plan. I do believe some of it was dumb luck and a lot of it was Oliver and Ryan. Whether it was intentional, accidental or a little bit of both they have created a dynamic that is unique to them. A show that is in its 8th season and more popular than ever and a pairing that has even more interest now than ever before. That doesn't happen. But it happened here and it happened with them. They got so lucky with Oliver and Ryan's dynamic/chemistry. You don't turn away from that. You just don't. There will always be people who don't like it but they are the minority, a sometimes very loud minority, but they are the minority nonetheless. You can say it's a cheesey little firefighter show all you want but it's a cheesey little firefighter show that has the potential to make television history, and that's not hyperbole. They legitimately have a chance to do something no one else has ever done. That's amazing and worth celebrating. People are allowed to be excited about them. It's a big deal and they should be allowed to say that.

Your second question is interesting because it goes hand in hand with a truly American phenomenon. The belief that it is the responsibility of the people who believe facts matter should meet the people who disregard facts because they go against their individual belief where they are. Why do we have to cater to these people? Why is it our responsibility to talk to them with a level of respect their viewpoint does not deserve? Facts matter. Just because someone doesn't like the truth doesn't stop it from being the truth. In this case we're talking about a television show but the rule still applies. The canon facts never merited their beliefs. Never. Not once. Instead of acknowledging that fact they disregarded or flat out tried to erase the canon evidence in favor of the made up version of events they and Lou created. It's not mine or anyone else's responsibility to go along with that garbage. What I regret is that in the beginning I treated them with a level of respect and courtesy they absolutely did not deserve. I answered their asks kindly and with a level of respect for their feelings that I never should have given. I should have called a spade a spade from day one. My mistake was giving them the benefit of the doubt. I believed they got caught up in the biBuck excitement and believed they would come back down to reality soon enough. That was my mistake. They wanted no part of reality. In no time at all suddenly Eddie was an abusive, manipulative evil man who deserved to have his life destroyed and his son to be raised by Buck and the plot device they chose to declare their allegiance too. Why in the world should any of us be pressured into making them feel better about that decision? Then they turned on Buck. Suddenly they were erasing Bucks canon history in order to make the plot device more important and necessary than he was ever going to be but we were the bad guys for calling that batshit behavior out? No. They showed their true colors very early on and the minute they did so I should have reacted accordingly, but I didn't. It was incomprehensible to me that such a below average, ignorant, racist, sexist, talentless white man could convince supposed able minded people that he was God's gift to television. But he did and the minute that became obvious I should have stopped engaging all together. They're not interested in reality. They were never interested in reality. They are interested in nothing but their made up viewpoint and it's not mine or any other member of this fandom's responsibility to make them feel better about that. The facts were there and they chose to ignore them. That's on them. Not me.

Thank you Nonny! 😋

Okay, I'll do my best to answer both questions as good as I can.

First things first... unrequited Buddie? Not a snowball's chance in hell! Once one of them expresses a romantic interest in the other? It is GAME ON for Buddie!

ABC is sitting on a goldmine here. This is the kind of story that will attract new viewers and especially the people who have heard people talk about 'those two gay firefighters' for years now, but who won't watch until they become canon.

There was an influx of new people when Buck came out as bisexual. Unfortunately they also brought along more toxicity because of the whole T/Lou fiasco, but just imagine all the new viewers who will tune in specifically for Buddie. It'll be epic.

I am one of those people who is 100% convinced that Buddie is in the works. It is happening. There is no other way this story can go anymore unless the show wants to lose viewers. Because a lot of people will stop watching if it doesn't happen. That's how this works and ABC knows that all too well.

Now on to question 2: Would I have done anything differently during the S7-S8 hiatus knowing what I know now?

The answer is 'no', I don't think so. I tried to stay as honest and respectful as I could towards BT shippers. I never made it a secret that I didn't really vibe with T and that got me a ton of anonymous hatred where some of these stans accused me of homophobia and wished me dead.

I was critical about T and BT, but I always tried to stay nice about it. Ship and let ship is still my motto, but I have to admit that towards the end of the hiatus my patience had worn very thin when it came to BT and their fandom.

Especially after they went completely off the rails and made those crazy wild accusations towards me and some friends and actually fabricated false evidence to accuse us further. That was truly insane behaviour from some of these people.

But that's all behind us now as the show has thankfully left T/Lou behind forever in 8a. So I'd like to focus more on the wonderful things that happened during that hiatus.

One of the best things that happened is that I gained so many lovely followers and fandom friends. We all stuck together and it felt really nice.

To all the lovely followers and mutuals reading this, I've gotten to know so many of you guys and I'm so grateful for that. I won't name all of you because that will take all day, but you all know who you are. 😊 Special shout out to Justine though! She was (and still is) my rock!

Another highlight during that hiatus was getting to know the 'anonymous blog I love' aka Ali. I'm still thankful that that happened. She made, and still makes, the most eloquent posts about fandom and she is always spot on. Case in point? The answer above!😋 I cherish her friendship very much. 🤗

I hope this fandom will soon move on from the T/Lou era when 8b airs and that we'll collectively stop talking about him. He isn't worth the hassle. It's time to focus on the future now and leave the past where it belongs, behind us.

IMPORTANT! Please don't repost this ask and/or a link that leads straight to my Tumblr account on Twitter or any other social media. Thank you!

Heads up! For anyone who is giving me the shifty eyes for reposting Ali's updates instead of reblogging. Read this.

Remember, no hate in comments, reblogs or inboxes. Let's keep it civil and respectful. Thank you.

If you are interested in more of Ali’s posts, you can find all of her posts so far under the tag: anonymous blog I love.

[weaselbeaselpants]

I don't mean block so she can't access ur blog whatsoever, I mean block for the sake of just not wanting to see her posts and not wanting to engage with her personally.

>>>Context: After Sai's (I still think very badly worded) talk about Palestine bloggers I blocked her for my own sake. Trying to warn and rationalize to other people what they out to do about a crisis and accounts that appear to exist out of nowhere possibly being bots isn't the problem. That is a thing; I know, Pro-Palestine people in my circle are all about verification and stoping to double check links and look over stories like this. What offended me then and still does was Sai's and that other user's obviously staunch opinion. Sai isn't antiPalestine but she's convinced that all donation bloggers are scams -> I know for a fact that is wrong, but it's obv an opinion she is not budging from. I don't feel like arguing with her or being told by her followers how I'm wrong unless they want a full-breakdown and expose of how I know that claim is false and unhelpful -> my focus then and now is on reblogging genuine gofundmes and supporting Palestine the way I know I can. Sai's take is to only support legit organizations. Mine is different. It's best we keep our distance on this topic. All that to say; the reason I blocked Sai isn't because I don't want her snooping around my stuff, it's so that I can keep my distance because blocking Sai means not personally seeing all her posts. I still do not think Sai is some horrible person but after what she said I just rlly don't want to hear from her.

You can use a block for whatever you want and I follow my friends' philosophy that that can be just putting up boundaries as well as serious 'don't access my blog'-grudges or reports.

And, frankly, you haven't supplied me with an answer to my second tagged comment there- HOW IS Sai 'just as bad' or 'the other side of the coin' as Lily? Your posts have not proved that evidence to me. Sai is herself pretty insensitive at times and opinionated on what she believes in; Lily is an abusive serial sockpuppeteer, abject racist/antisemite, abelist, and possible r@pist who I've never seen her even attempt to apologize for the things she's said. Lily wrote REALLY GRAPHIC cp, which continues to lie about it while she continues to pedojack others about their fictional tastes. Lily has been caught twice this last year wishing violence or suicide on two of her critics. Sai is a person that I don't particularly like or agree with; Lily is a deeply toxic, bad person. For what it's worth I have Lily, Mikay and a bunch of their followers also blocked so I don't have to see them and their 'Lily Orchard did nothing wrong' posts when I search anything. Tumblr's block system may be a one-scenario tool, but I'm allowed to use it as I want. I can block people I'm personally not talking to (Sai) and people who I don't think anyone should talk to (Lily).

Among Lily Orchard's tactics to try and sway people to her side/divest them from looking further into her crimes is to discredit her critics by insisting something else about them makes them unqualified. That SHE'S the abused one here and all this back and forth fighting is just "#drama" and not her being in scandal which she seems pretty damn guilty of. By insisting that Sai and the other Lorch critics are just as bad as Lily, you are giving Lily ammunition. You are making her more legitimate that she is in people's eyes. I don't think you want to do that but I ask you then to please just leave Sai alone as best you can.

Now, enjoy your own block.

sai and crew have entangled themselves in being the moral superior. it's their brand now. there's really no going back from it at this point, and when lily stops being a fruitful taget they have to try out new ones. that's their most recent activity.

A much more accurate statement is that their brand is being socially accepted internet bullies-- until it's their lunch money getting stolen. Suddenly it's not so funny anymore.

[teyvatairconditioningco]

Fuck it, the Avisos boys as cucumbers

Beelzebub is a Marketmore 76, the quintessential cucumber. You acquire a whole bunch of them aaaaand they're gone (to mold).

Bael is a Boston pickling cucumber, very crisp, takes spices very well. Also has several flavors of psychological trauma.

Naberius is an Armenian yard-long cucumber. Knows the secrets of the universe, easily digestible (those two things are unrelated).

Stolas is a Richmond green apple cucumber. He's just a little guy. Just a little war criminal. Bit thin-skinned. Vibes of a Cancer (astrological).

And finally, Amon is a lemon cucumber. Kinda wanna throw him, kinda wanna shove him in my mouth whole. Would confuse the shit out of your grandmother. Probably tastes great if you can find one.

All of them when they see [you]

[gingermintpepper]

hi I love your tags so so much! they were so sweet and so interesting and creative and the whole Aphrodite type of beauty thing sounds really interesting do you have any articles and recommendations to read further into it??

-hogoflight

Hello my fine feathered (I am assuming possession of feathers if you are, indeed, capable of flight) @hogoflight! I'm always always happy to hear that people appreciate my frenzied rambling in the tags :D! I have a lot of articles and recommendations :D!! Ancient Greek notions of beauty and representations of it in their art and sculptures is a pretty well studied topic! There isn't any way for us now to know definitively what the beauty standard was (it varied widely from region to region and culture to culture after all) but here are a couple of my favourite reads about Aphrodite and what her representations tell us about idealised beauty!

Probably the most empirically extensive one I can list is Krönström's thesis which compares statues of Aphrodite and literary text referring to both the goddess and mortal women to determine physical ideals for women in five specific eras of Grecian antiquity. Including measurements of the statues there are many descriptions of Aphrodite as 'curvy' with a 'voluptuous figure' and with 'ample buttocks and bosom'.

"When the beauty traits are described in the texts, they are never extreme or anything that could not be found in normal people just that they are more beautiful in every aspect. Furthermore, the sculptures’ physical forms look healthy, they are tall and have distinct curves. Great examples of this are the Knida sculpture and de Milo (the Melian) sculpture."

Of course, these images are still idealised, and there was still a concept such as 'too fat' or 'too skinny' found in written records (and this thesis even includes analysis of pornographic writings and descriptions of the fashion and stylings of pubic hair of women from different regions!!) but from an interpretational standpoint? There is absolutely no reason why these can't refer to a fuller figure. Height was also a very important factor after all and over the course of many eras, it seems like being well proportioned in addition to the length and appearance of one's hair were the most important factors (and, like Apollo, greater beauty was given to those with curlier hair)

Mireille M. Lee's 'Other Ways of Seeing' essay which talks about the forgotten female viewers of Knidian Aphrodite which is also extremely illuminating on how Aphroditic sexuality and sensuality was perceived totally differently from the well documented male voyeuristic gaze (which was overly preoccupied with the statue's nakedness and therefore over-sensationalised the statue's physical appearance) vs women's perspective on the statue which is more centered on the beauty of simplicity in Aphrodite's garment and decoration and in her power and ability to captivate both in her finery and without it. I think it's especially useful in exploring the importance of finery, jewellry and adornment in representations of Aphroditic beauty.

"Some of the small-scale copies are heavily jeweled, especially those from the eastern Mediterranean, for example the Hellenistic gilded terracotta statuette in the Çanakkale Museum (Fig. 5) in which the goddess wears, in addition to the armband on her (right) arm, the following: a necklace with multiple pendants; cross-bands extending over both shoulders and hips, with a cascading pendant in the center; a coiled snake armband on the left arm and another snake on her left thigh, and a twisted anklet on her right leg. (The left leg has been restored, and might also have featured an anklet.)"

"Jewelry is especially associated with Aphrodite in Greek literature. As seen above, in the Homeric Hymn to Aphrodite, the goddess adorns herself with gold jewelry, dress-pins, and earrings in the shape of flowers (162–3)..."

Finally, and to me, the most important one in the argument for an interpretation of Hyacinthus as fat, beautiful and fundamentally Aphroditic comes from Brilmayer's brilliant brilliant thesis done on Aphrodite's work and influence in Archaic Greek Poetry which does away with all of that masculine preoccupation with physical proportion, measurement and bodily ideals for a focus on a Sapphic Aphroditic ideal centered in clothing, ornamentation and, most importantly cunning as symbols of Aphrodite and ultimately a feminine idealised form of beauty. This paper also discusses Pandora and Helen in these terms and it is just kind of a wonderful read tbh.

"Combining Homeric and Hesiodic elements with her own ideas, she [Sappho] alters the way female beauty is viewed. For example, the Homeric war chariot – a symbol of male, military prowess - comes to symbolise the totality of Aphrodite’s power uniting in itself male and female qualities. Having addressed the concept of beauty directly, Sappho then concludes that beauty lies in the eye of the beholder. With the help of Helen of Troy and her beloved Anaktoria, Sappho sets out to reinvent the concept of female beauty as a godlike, subjective quality that may be expressed in many ways, yet remains inspired by Aphrodite."

The conclusion to all of this of course is that Aphroditic ideal beauty is much more fluid compared to its stricter Apolline masculine standard. The nuances and understandings of both are of course, constantly being studied, analysed and scrutinised but really, if Dionysus who was both bearded and clean shorn, effeminate, birthed and rebirthed (and twice gestated!) and strongly associated with vegetation can be popularly portrayed as fat and handsome, why can't Hyacinthus?!

[starflungwaddledee]

[outeremissary]

kasander + 😴 please!

Thank you ❤️ Sleep questions about D&D elves always lead peculiar places, don't they?

hc + 😴 for a sleep-themed headcanon

Kasander seldom sleeps willingly. Their trance is already haunted by half-alien memories of blood and darkness, disorganized images they struggle to stitch together and match to their origins. It's upsetting even without any supernatural incursion causing more extreme visions, and it makes them fear resting. Sleeping, on the rare experiment trying to avoid the memories, is much worse. They always dream, and they always dream Bhaal's dreams. And it takes such a terribly long time to wake. So they avoid sleeping, and they're thankful not to have a reason to.

However, sleep is the most convenient way for the Emperor to contact them, and the Emperor has a way of pulling them under whenever he pleases. When they first met and the Emperor was still in the form of the Dream Visitor the Emperor offered to soothe their nights from the restless, terrible trance by quieting their dreams- if only they would sleep, of course. Disoriented, still largely amnesiac, and distressed by the visions, Kasander agreed eagerly (there was a lot of agreeing with the Emperor then) and committed themself to the psionic protection out of desperation for any relief from the growing fear there was something wrong with them. It did seem to work- mostly- but when Kas began to break with the Emperor they stopped sleeping nightly as well. By that point they were ready to grapple with the horrors of trance again, as painful and difficult as they were.

[fragglerockopinions]

The worst thing about suffering is that it still hurts when the danger is over but no one cares about it anymore because it shouldn't hurt. No one will ever say "I'm sorry that happened to you" especially when they barely say "I'm sorry that's happening."

[im-phoenix-black]

So I have a genuine good faith question I want to ask.

Aside from obvious consent issues and birth defects of resulting offspring, why is incest not okay?

That is to say, a hypothetical situation in which a brother and a sister date as adults and take care to prevent pregnancy and always enthusiastically consent... What harm is being done?

I fully admit that in reality, consent is frequently a grey area and not fully black and white, so I'm giving you a hypothetical where it is, to make the question I'm actually asking about more obvious.

[chuluoyi]

𝐁𝐀𝐍𝐄 𝐎𝐅 𝐄𝐗𝐈𝐒𝐓𝐄𝐍𝐂𝐄

- sylus x reader

you and your lover are hailed and feared, but who would have guessed that behind closed doors, both of you are just that — lovers?

genre/warnings: very suggestive, making out, fluff, comfort, period cramps, assassin!reader (not l&ds mc), loosely based on sylus' secret times: midnight warmth & exclusive care!

note: very self-indulgent bye pls don't look at me :') this fic is a companion to assassin!reader series (strictly (un)professional and jealousy incarnate)

“Who’s ther— lord! Missus! What happened to you!?”

On a rainy night, you staggered into the base, drenched and covered with dirt. Your steps were unsteady as you made your way through the front door, and the first person to see you, Luke, was so shocked by the sight that he rushed to your side.

“Kieran! Call Boss!” he shouted to his twin, who immediately sprinted off to find him, steadying you. “Are you injured?”

“No,” you hissed, wincing as you clutched your abdomen. “Let go, I’m fine—” But before you could finish, you missed a step and—

—fell into Luke's arms.

In that very instant, Luke genuinely feared for his life. He squeaked and stammered, incoherent sounds escaping him, because oh lord— if Boss sees me ever touching his woman—

“What are you doing?”

And there came his nightmare. Sylus’ deep voice cut through like a blade, marking the arrival of doomsday itself.

“B-Boss! It isn’t what it looks like!” Luke quivered, desperately trying to explain himself.

However, Sylus paid him no mind and exhaled sharply, immediately moving over to pull you out of Luke’s grasp. “Are you hurt?”

“I’m fine!” you insisted, pulling away from him while staggering. “I’m not wounded or anything. Just... I just need a bath, please.”

Sylus eyed you from top to bottom. You had just been out for a reconnaissance, and yet you looked as though you had been through a tornado and back. Disheveled, your dress was smeared with mud and dirt, and even grime clung to your hair.

“Did you fall into a sewer or something?” he questioned, and he knew he had hit a nerve when you shot him a glare.

But you spared him no answer, walking away with labored breaths and a hand pressed against your lower belly. It was clear you were in pain, and the sight tugged at him as he followed you.

“What’s wrong?” he asked, his concern growing. “What hurts?”

“You don’t have to fuss over me—” your breath hitched, feeling exhausted, and ashamed all at once. “Just my period, nothing much,” you murmured in a quieter voice so the twins wouldn’t hear.

As you reached the stairs to the second floor, you felt like collapsing. Did you really have to climb these stairs, too?

As if reading your mind, Sylus let out a sigh, but you nearly squealed when he lifted you into his arms.

“You’ll get dirty!” you rebuked, even as he took large strides up the stairs. “Sylus!”

“Just hold onto me.” He shot you a pointed look. “You can’t even walk without gasping for air, and you still want to climb the stairs? You’ll end up rolling and breaking your back.”

Despite your protests, your lover immediately brought you to his bathroom and sat you down on the sink. He turned the hot water on and then faced you.

“So? What did you get yourself into?” he asked, his red eyes narrowing in dissatisfaction. “You were fine, and you didn’t face anyone.”

You pressed your eyes shut, leaning against the wall, resigned to explain. “Fell into mud. Totally idiotic, I know, but my cramps started right before, so…”

“I don’t recall you experiencing this before. What brought this on?”

You met his gaze indignantly, retorting, “Well, a certain someone banged me so hard last night, and I got my period right after.”

It was quite unexpected, but still answered his concern. So, to that, Sylus snorted and tousled your hair, a playful twinkle in his eyes. “Ah, sorry, I guess?”

You pursed your lips, aware of how unapologetic he was. He smirked and added, “Now that I’m dirty too... I suppose we’ll have to take a bath together.”

“Are you mad? Do you want to get covered in my blood?”

He shrugged nonchalantly. “Why not—”

“No,” you retorted firmly, clearly irked. “You take the bath after me, and that’s final.”

. . .

“Put your arm around my neck,” Sylus commanded when you both emerged from the bath and already dressed in silk bathrobes. You complied, and he swiftly lifted you into a princess carry, bringing you to the bed.

Despite yourself, your heart fluttered at his action. He set you down gently, and the moment your back met the soft surface, you relished it and let out an involuntary moan. “Ahh...”

Your voice was soft and sultry, though tinged with a hint of pain. Sylus placed his hand gently on your face. “Your cheeks are warm,” he noted. “And you still look pale.”

"Mmm," you mumbled, suddenly the total fatigue catching up to you as you leaned into his touch. Seeing you so pliant like this seemed to flip a switch inside him, and he immediately settled next to you and placed his huge hand on your lower belly, pressing down on it.

“What are you doing?” you frowned.

“I’m giving you a massage,” he replied. “Stop squirming. I’m trying to pamper you here.”

“You don’t have to…”

“My woman is in enough pain that she doesn’t talk back to me. It’s feels off.”

“...actually, you suck. You’re too rough.”

Taking your whine into account, he adjusted his touch, softening his pressure. "How is it? Better?"

You didn’t immediately reply, indulging in the warm sensation, letting out a sigh as you squeezed your eyes shut. “Mm... Yeah, it feels good now. Don’t stop…”

There was something quietly erotic about watching you, usually so defiant, surrender to his touch like this. Sylus felt a deep, protective satisfaction as he continued his gentle ministrations—

But after a while...

Before he could stop himself, he leaned in, pulling you closer as he buried his face in your shoulder, inhaling deeply, savoring the scent of the bath foam you had just shared. “Mmm…”

You were caught off-guard and shivered at his breath tickling your skin, eyes fluttering open. “Sylus…” you murmured, a mix of protest and surprise in your voice.

But he didn’t pull away, his lips lingering against your skin, his gaze fixed on your bare neck, whispering, “Just relax. I’ve got you.”

Then, when he suddenly nibbled on your neck, you jolted awake. The gentle bite on your sensitive skin sent another shiver down your spine, stirring a mix of warmth that made your pulse race.

But he didn't stop there, as Sylus trailed your neck with a series of kisses and wet sucks, his breath hot against your skin. Soon, the only sounds filling the room were his quiet sighs and the soft noises of his lips as he continued to bite and pepper kisses on your skin, over and over.

“Ngh…” Each touch left you almost breathless, and the heat between you growing with every passing moment, making your toes curl and you moan softly by his ear.

“Hold me,” he gruffly whispered, and as if bewitched, you clung to his shoulders. He let out a husky chuckle. “Not too hard, or you won't be able to sleep later.”

“And whose fault would that be?” you quipped, entangling your legs with his, savoring the warmth of his body against yours.

“I’ve spoiled you rotten, haven’t I... sweetie?” he murmured amidst kisses, his tone laced with intrigue and his burgundy eyes flashing with a glint. “Just let me have my fill for a while.”

If you had a mirror, you’d see the hickeys forming on your neck, but instead of fighting him, you pulled him closer, letting out breathy moans freely and massaging his scalp as if urging him to go further.

“Naughty vixen—you are,” Sylus rasped deliciously in your ear, thick with desire and restraint as his grip on you tightened. “Tempting me, knowing full well I can’t do anything to you…”

A low giggle slipped from your lips. “Unfortunately… I learn from the best.”

Hard to get, snarky, taunting... You were the bane of his existence, and yet Sylus wouldn't have it another way. Your defiance and teasing only deepened his affection, making every challenge you presented feel like an irresistible part of what drew him to you.

He knew when his patience was on the verge of snapping, so to end it, he sucked hard on your shoulder one last time, making sure to leave another mark there. The squelching sound reverberated through both of you, before he pulled away and planted a firm kiss on your forehead, a gesture of both dominance and fondness for you.

“Now sleep,” he grounded out. “Your body has been through enough.”

“Mngh...” you whined, curling into him in contentment, your head nestled against his toned chest where you could feel his strong, steady heartbeat. “Really unfair...”

“You're going to feel better soon...” he sighed, one hand soothing your back and the other resting on your waist. “And as soon as you do...”

A wicked grin curved his lips.

“I'll pick up where I left off.”

[sarcosmiiic]

PLEASE KEEP THIS IN MIND:

we, as fans, do not have a right to private information. anything shared with us on this is a privilege. please do not abuse it. the cc's could shut down and never talk about it if we overwhelm them.

also, please keep in mind that ONE HERMIT and THE ENTIRETY OF HERMITCRAFT are NOT THE SAME THING. the entire fandom is not 'ruined' or 'completely unsafe' because of the actions of one person.

PLEASE DO NOT ASSUME THAT THE OTHER HERMITS KNEW ANYTHING ABOUT WHATEVER'S GOING ON WITH ISKALL. this is not some big conspiracy, it's the consequences of one person's actions. they weren't hiding this from us, that's not how hermitcraft works, they truly didn't know. they probably knew as much as us about this, so making it an 'us against them' situation is immature and shortsighted.

ALSO, I AM BEGGING EVERYONE TO PLEASE NOT SENSATIONALIZE THIS. PLEASE DO NOT TURN HATING ISKALL INTO A MEME OR A JOKE.

mcyt'ers being revealed to be less-than-great people is not a rare thing, sadly, but i've seen it turned into a joke/meme/trend in other fandoms. this both minimalizes the actual people's/victims' struggles, makes the entire situation feel less serious than it is, especially to outsiders looking in, and makes everyone in the fandom look immature, petty, unable to take anything seriously, and genuinely harmful.

this server, fandom, and community are not dying, it is not ruined forever, this is one (major, i'm not trying to minimalize it) issue that we're currently dealing with. it will be okay. we will move on. this is not the beginning of the end. please calm down. i love this fandom, god bless all of you. <3

edit: doc has said on stream that we will likely get more information as time passes. like i said, this is a PRIVILEGE. we are not OWED information. please be grateful for what we're given, and POLITELY ask questions if you must. if a cc doesn't give you the answer you want, or doesn't answer at all, LEAVE THEM ALONE. THIS IS NOT AN EXCUSE TO HARASS PEOPLE. the hermits are likely just as stressed out as us, if not probably more so, so please keep that in mind when contacting them.

don't freak out, we'll be okay, this is not the end of the world, nor is it the end of Hermitcraft. we will be okay.

second edit: please remember that (at least as far as we know) ISKALL AND STRESS WERE NOT KICKED OR BANNED. THEY LEFT OF THEIR OWN VOLITION.

ALSO!!! VERY IMPORTANT!!!

WE. DO. NOT. KNOW. EXACTLY. WHAT. HAPPENED.

PLEASE DO NOT ASSUME ANYTHING SIMPLY BASED OFF OF OTHER MCYT'ERS PAST ACTIONS/SCANDALS. WE DO NOT KNOW EXACTLY WHAT HAPPENED. WE MIGHT NOT EVER KNOW EXACTLY WHAT HAPPENED. WE NEED TO BE OKAY WITH THAT AND NOT DRAW OUR OWN CONCLUSIONS.

TWITTER LINKS TO VICTIM RESPONSES:

https://twitter.com/Kasszi_/status/1860670647946604985

https://twitter.com/emoslab_/status/1860697161245323559

[retiredteabag]

Wishful Thinking

arranged marriage with Nanami… a continuation

pt. 1 - pt. 2 - pt. 3 - next part

〰・♡・〰〰・♡・〰〰・♡・〰〰・♡・〰〰・♡・〰

You would have never imagined, but as it turns out, you’ve only known your spouse 48 hours and you’ve already begun to love married life.

In this time, lots has occurred, for one, you had to explain to your husband repeatedly that you really, truly, genuinely, had absolutely no opinion on where to spend the honeymoon.

He didn’t take too fondly to that…

--

"Please-" You had insisted, "Wherever you'd like! Whatever you choose, I'll be very happy with."

He had sighed, running a hand down his face, "I would much prefer to hear where you enjoy traveling."

You had confessed that you never really had the chance to leave the estate or school. Only on rare occasions were you presented the opportunity to venture outside, even when working as a sorcerer. You hadn’t even been on a school trips.

"Mountains or beaches?" He asked, the two of you were seated on the shared couch, his morning coffee in hand.

"I don't mind. I would love to see either."

He seemed to blink for a second too long, breathing in, he offered, "Do you have an interest in cities? Or do you prefer the countryside?"

You just smiled, "I promise you, I don't have an opinion either way, whatever you like."

"Alright... Do you care to fly, or would you like a cruise?"

The idea stressed you out a bit. Shrugging, before you answer, he grumbles your name, "What do you enjoy? Shopping? Hiking? Sightseeing?" He doesn't give you time to respond, "Eating? What cuisine do you like, by the way? That might help you decide."

You hold up a wobbly hand, "Woah...um can I be honest?"

Your husband sits up straight. Just a day before, you would have never even considered speaking so casually, but, just as you anticipated, he reasures you quickly, "Please do."

"Well... the things is, I would really just prefer you to choose..."

Nothing would feel worse than if said anything he didn’t like. You can tell your husband is a cooperative guy, he would likely just go with whatever you offered. The problem is that you want him to be happy. And frankly, you're not really sure what you like. Making a decision would be too much right now. You hardly know the things you enjoy yourself.

--

That same day, Nanami had requested you view him as a friend, any mention of your "wifely duties" and he would grimace. Eventually, through your easy back and forth, you were able to persuade him into telling you what part he played in this union the two of you shared.

"I... well, I'll speak freely as you have done... I took very little pleasure in Jujutsu society for some time." He huffed.

You had known this much, but as he continued, your dread mounted even more.

"The higher ups were not so fond of this idea-"

"But-" You interrupted, "Oh, I'm sorry, but, you're not from a clan, how could they have any sway in your decision?"

He just grinned, "You must not know, in your position, but the higher-ups have lots of sway in any sorcerers life, despite my...birth status."

"I had no idea..."

This, at least, was news to you. "They believed that an arranged marriage would keep you in the world of sorcery?"

He looked at you strangely then, "Yes, they were sure of that much. That is, marriage to a fellow sorcerer, and," He paused momentarily and cleared his throat, tugging at his collar, "The prospect of a child." He finished.

Oh.

There was an awkward silence between you two. Neither making eye contact.

Too uncomfortable…

Mmm, we have a nice coffee table...

Should you say something...?

You grin slowly, "We’re more similar than I thought."

He looks up at you and suddenly you are cold in the heat of his gaze. He hums low in his throat, "I'm very glad you think so."

--

After much prattling, and assurance on your end that you REALLY did not want to pick the location of your honeymoon, Nanami made a slight offering of an opinion. That being an “adventure train”.

"Oh! That sounds lovely!" You immediately respond. Just grateful he finally said something he could look forward to.

You had no idea what an “adventure train” entailed.

He squinted accusatorily, "Oh, please, I know you're just saying that."

"No, I'm not" you pout, "I love trains...on summer and winter breaks I would ride the train from Tokyo home..."

Chuckling he smirks, "Yes, well, this would be a little different from those trains” he calls your name, “honestly, I would like to hear about you." He settles comfortably into the sofa.

Suddenly confused by this, you start, “Oh... what would you like to know?"

"About you." Hes so matter of fact, "I want to know about the real you. Not....this person you are right now."

You straighten your spine, "What-" you scoff, "What are you talking about?"

He just laughs, it's deep and his chest shutters a bit, "I'm talking about how you just live by what other people want. You haven't told me a single thing that you enjoy since we've been together, which I must admit hasn't been very long-"

"Exactly!” You point at him. Almost stick your tongue out, then think better of it.

"Which hasn't been very long-" he restates, "But really, just last night you couldn't even tell me the kind of food you wanted-"

"Because I really didn't mind! I would have loved anything!"

"Precisely. I want to know-" He leans in close and you almost gasp at the suddenness of it, "What you like." He twists a hair out of your face and grins, "If I asked, I doubt you could answer me your favorite color."

"Well...I-"

He tilts his head and suddenly you feel accused. "You like them all, don't you?"

"There's nothing wrong with that." You smirk.

"No." He finally gives you room, leaning back and examining you now. “No, not at all. But I doubt you have anything you could name me that you would like right now, like for me to do, or say, like to be given, like to-" "I'd like-" You start, "For you to stop with all this nonsense."

"Very good...that's a start, I'm sure you would like that- you little people pleaser."

"I don't think there is anything...wrong with trying to make people happy." You stare firmly. You mean it.

It's strange, just a moment ago, you felt uncomfortable making eye contact, but now, your gazes rival one another.

"Just so long as you're not... making yourself into whatever you think someone wants to see. Just so long as you are being yourself." He hums.

Okay, this wasn't fun anymore.

You lose the fight, looking at your hands instead of those striking eyes. If you were being honest with yourself, you don't even know those things that he spoke of. What you like, what you think, who you really are. Is it so wrong to just try to be... what everyone else wants?

"I'm not lying though..." You look up once more, "I really would rather you just pick what we eat and where we go..."

"I believe you." He's not smiling now, "Really, I do. But what I would like is to learn of what you want."

There's a small flare inside of you that burns iron hot with his pushing this point, you extinguish it, finally saying, "I don't know what I want. I think I just…want what you want." You roll your eyes, shrugging our more. You know he must find you ridiculous.

Nanami purses his lips, the hand that was previously on your hair, is now on your chin. He looks so serious, yet somehow, kind.

"I'll teach you."

Your heart thumps.

It won't work, you think.

What you don't know, is that Nanami Kento is the most persistent and dedicated man to walk the earth and he, unlike you, does not so easily give up.

--

The next morning, while you riffle through the luggage you have packed for your multi-destinational luxury excursion, you recall that moment on the couch when he brushed his hand across your jaw.

He had been so soft. How could a sorcerer, one of his caliber even, have such a gentle hand?

You shudder.

Shaking your head, you zip up your suitcase, run a hand across your goose-bumped arm, and try to focus your energy on things other than your husbands hands, or his laugh, or his voice-

You shut your door to your room a little too harshly.

A form in the kitchen startles at the noise and quickly shuffles to the hallway,

The energy you had so determinedly focused on less appealing thoughts fades to nothing as Nanami makes his way toward you, a mug in hand.

His hair looks tousled in an annoyingly handsome way, he’s dressed casually, but it looks undeniably attractive, his shirt is loose everywhere and when he moves, it outlines his waist.

His waist? God. Get yourself together.

"Are you alright?" Nanami calls your name. His brows are taught and he’s bend towards you slightly.

"What? Yes, yes I'm quite well. I-I've just finished packing, see?" You pull your over-large suitcase in front of you.

"Oh..." He smiles, "Well done. Well, would you?

Huh? “…Would I what?"

"...Like honey…” he lifts the cup he hold in a large hand, “in your tea?"

My tea?

Oh god, you hope he hadn't already asked you that. (He definitely had.)

"Oh! Uhh is there already some in there?" You point to the steaming cup in his hand.

He grins, and it looks unbelievably feline in nature. "No, first you tell me if you like honey in your tea."

You scoff. He was still on about this. "I drink it both ways.” You raise your nose up at him.

He comes in close, suddenly appearing much taller than you remember, "Yes. I know you do. But how do you like it."

You reach for the mug but he doesn't let go, allowing you to grip his hand. "This is just perfect." You grunt, trying to pull the mug from his grasp. It doesn’t budge.

"So you don't mind that I sweetened it?" He looks at you, blond locks flopping into his face.

You grin, "Perfect." Your shoulders roll back, recalling how much you adored when a maid would add sugar to the tea pots back home. "I adore honey."

"Oh, good." He only then tugs his hand from yours, waltzing into the kitchen.

You follow behind in a very “lost pet” sort of fashion. It's only when he pulls a jar of honey from the cabinet and begins to spoon some of the golden nectar out that you realize he has played you.

You gasp. "Auh! You lied!"

He just grins. But you continue, "I like it both ways, really.” You cover your face, “really, a-and you don't have to make this for me, you know, I can do it myself."

He finishes stirring it and holds the mug out, handle facing you. He's leaned on the kitchen counters. He must feel very accomplished now, with that smug look covering his face.

"Don't worry, I'm well aware. Can't I do even this for you?" He gives you a funny smile. "I figured you liked sweets. You seemed to enjoy dessert the other night."

"You are a strangely observant creature Mr. Nanami Kento." You huff, taking the tea outstretched to you and sip.

It's delicious.

He hums, grinning, but you don’t see, "Is that right?"

You look up again and realize he's been watching you drink.

"Yes, you are."

He just chuckles, leaning further back on the counters.

"I was asking about the tea, honey."

He just laughs, leaving the kitchen. You take a deep breath, eyes closed and try to compose yourself. Somewhat peeved because, yes, the tea really was just right.

〰・♡・〰〰・♡・〰〰・♡・〰〰・♡・〰〰・♡・〰

Tags:

If you ever want to be taken off of the tag list please just let me know :] (if your name is here but you didn’t get tagged. I think it’s either bc your blog is new/blank/empty or you need to check your privacy settings)

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[causenessus]

I HAD TWO MORE TAGS THAT DIDN'T FIT I'M SORRY BUT I LOVE MANEATER SO MUCH I WILL FOREVER BE CONSTANTLY HITTING TAGLIMITS FOR THIS FIC!!! THIS FIC IS MY LIFE!!!

THE MANEATER CHAPTER SEVEN: ecstasy

masterlist

divider credits to roseraris

The smell of alcohol is soaked into her. Her skin is left sticky, and the cold chill in the late summer air raises bumps over her skin. She presses her palms into her eye sockets, and cries. The exhaustion and humiliation make her cry harder, and the crying makes her more exhausted and humiliated.

She’s not surprised when she hears the sound of a milk crate being dragged along the pavement. She lifts her head to watch Iwaizumi pull it up next to hers, plopping right down by her side. He looks as tired as she feels. For a second, he doesn’t say anything, just looks at her, and she looks back at him with wet, watering eyes.

“Actually,” he starts, leaning back against the brick wall behind him and crossing his arms over his chest, “that makeup smudged all over your face makes you look more goth than before.”

“Oh my fucking god,” she whines, dropping her head forward back into her palms.

Iwaizumi still stares at her. She can feel it. “That guy’s a fucking dick,” he says to her. “You don’t deserve to be treated like that.”

This prompts her to shoot right back up, making her head a little dizzy as she does so. “Yeah, I fucking know. He was the worst. And, for the record, he cheated on me, like, all over the place and then went around telling everyone that I was controlling. Like, sorry dickhead, but if not wanting you to cheat on me with every fucking person you meet makes me controlling, then sure, guess I’m controlling.”

“Then why’d you date ‘im?” Iwaizumi asks, not looking away from her.

She scoffs. “Don’t victim blame, asshole. People will put up with a lot when they wanna be cared about.”

It feels too vulnerable as soon as she says it. Iwaizumi turns his head away. “Yeah.”

There’s a beat of silence. She straightens out. “And he ruined my fucking leather,” she says, tugging at the tight and wildly uncomfortable corset. It digs into her skin and it’s gotten a million times worse now that it’s soaked in gin. “This was the first time I got to wear this too and I looked really fucking good in it and now it’s ruined because he’s a piece of shit.”

Iwaizumi makes a noise with his throat that she can’t decipher. “Want me to kick his ass until he gives you the money to replace it?”

“He can’t afford it,” she grumbles, and then looks over at Iwaizumi. “Got a cig?”

He reaches around into his back pocket and pulls out a slightly flattened carton. She watches in anticipation as he pulls one out and hands it to her. She places it between her lips, ready to fish for her lighter, but before she can make a move for it, Iwaizumi’s got his in front of her face. It casts shadows over half of his face. She looks down at his hands and notices his knuckles are red and raw. He holds the lighter to the tip of her cigarette until it’s cherried.

She inhales, and he retracts the light. “Thanks,” she says on the exhale.

Her muscles feel worn. She leans back up against the brick wall, slumped and eyes closed. She doesn’t want to cry again but she feels like she might if she’s out there for much longer. The cigarette helps. Not much, but it’s better than nothing.

“Hey,” Iwaizumi says, and it gets het attention. She rolls her head to the side to face him, finding that he’s already looking right at her. “Let me take you home.”

There’s a lump in her throat. She swallows. His eyes are always greener than she remembers them being. “You know, you kind of remind me of someone.”

Iwaizumi smiles. “Yeah?”

She nods. “Hannibal Lecter. Your vibes are uncanny.”

He rolls his eyes and stands, but his grin doesn’t drop. “Let’s go, brat.”

“”Let me take you home,’ sounds like you’re gonna skin me alive,” she grumbles.

She’s adjusting to stand when Iwaizumi lightly grips firmly, not tightly, around her bicep and pulls her to her feet. She stumbles for a moment before steadying. “I was gonna let you ride on the back of my board, but now you’re walking.”

“Oh man, you mean I missed my chance to get on that stallion? Life ruined.”

“You piss me off,” Iwaizumi says, turning his head away from her. She still sees him smile.

She figures he can probably see hers as well. “Feeling’s mutual, protein powder.”

Iwaizumi’s not nervous. That would be ridiculous. That would imply that there’s something to be nervous over. That there’s a chance for a good outcome and a bad outcome, and he has no personal stake in the matter. He’s just doing a favor for a friend. He doesn’t care.

He knocks on the door, and takes a steadying breath. He’s not nervous.

For a while, no one answers, and he starts to consider the possibility that he might have to walk away, coffee and croissant still in hand. It’s actually just when he’s about to step away that he hears the fiddling of a lock, and the door swings open.

Her roommates on the other side. Akaashi, he recollects. The one Oikawa rants about. Akaashi takes in the sight of him with a slight, subtle flinch. “Hello?”

Iwaizumi shifts on his feet. “She home?” he questions, vaguely aware of how rude he’s coming across. Not that it’s nerves, or anything.

“She’s here, just knocked out on the couch,” Akaashi says, and steps back, opening the door wider.

He peers into their apartment, and sees her there, splayed out on their couch with her head on Shimizu’s lap and her arms wrapped around her thigh like she’s holding onto a teddy bear. The both of them are deep in sleep, and the light snores that he has to lean into hear definitely come from her.

Iwaizumi maybe looks a little bit too long, but he’s never seen her like that before. Face free of powders and glitters, eyes washed free of black smudging and her hair pulled messily out of her face. For a second, he smiles, and then catches himself. He steps back, and hands the offerings to Akaashi. “Well, these are for her. From Oikawa.”

Akaashi raises an eyebrow. “Oikawa?”

He nods. “Yeah, just doin’ him a favor, dropping them off.”

“Sure,” Akaashi says, taking the coffee and the little brown pastry bag. “Totally makes sense, man.”

Iwaizumi nods, “Yeah, well, later then, man.”

For whatever reason, when Iwaizumi leaves, he feels really, really fucking stupid.

extras!

konoha won the scummy ex boyfriend poll by one vote

he and yn dated for a year on and off and it was a nightmare toxic relationship and everyone was so relieved when they finally broke up

oikawa saw akaashi's subtweets about him and they have a little beef over yn going (which one of you said they were having a twink off WHO SAID THAT it was so funny i wanna give you an award)

iwaizumi may or may not have thrown a punch after he kicked konoha out (he definitely did)

akaashi ate that fucking croissant the second he closed the door and iwaizumi left

omi was in the shower 'washing off everyone's gross sweat'

have a yn-kiyoko-omi-akaashi apartment floor plan!

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[wordsarelife]

—the alchemy

pairing: jj maybank x fem!routledge reader

summary: you always had a thing for jj, while you thought he had a thing for kie. you couldn't have been more wrong..

warnings: none i think

notes: i have absolutely no clue how to play poker, so please don't grill me lmao

the water glistened, reflecting the afternoon sun. you dunked your feet inside, hanging from the bridge you were sitting on. it was lightly moving due to the waves beneath it.

you kept your eyes trained on the horizon, but looking at nothing in particular.

jj came running from the shore, sitting down beside you, letting his feet dangle into the water next to yours. "john b is making food"

"what could he possibly be making?" you smiled, clearly knowing that there wasn't much left in the pantry. you got through the day alright, thanks to both of you working, but you didn't buy any extraordinary things to make sure you had enough money to pay everything else.

“we’re having toast,” jj smirked, then paused for dramatic effect. “but we raided heyward’s for tomatoes, and kiara brought guac from her mom. so it’s fancy toast.”

“fancy toast! the ritz could never.” you hugged your knees to your chest, resting your chin on them, but a smile crept up on your lips.

"what are you even doing out here alone?"

"i'm thinking"

"about your dad?" jj asked carefully. "you know I’m here if you need to spill. no judgment. not even if it’s super depressing.”

"thanks, i know" you were thankful that you had such great friends. people that were like family to you and always made sure you were alright, even if they didn't have much to give themselves, apart from kiara.

"are you going to surf the surge tomorrow?" jj changed the topic, interpreting your silence as answer enough.

"heard agatha's gonna be a bitch" you shrugged. "must be nice to lose a few unnecessary limbs"

"don't be ridiculous, i'm a pro" jj took the sunglasses off his head and pushed them on your nose instead. "are you coming or not?"

"i prefer not to" you giggled, slapping his hand away as he tried to readjust the rest of your apperance. "gonna look good for cps"

"they won't even make it out here, agatha will arrive too soon for that"

"well, then i should be thanking her, right?" you looked up to the sky, the sun still breaking through the slowly arriving clouds, but the darkness of them made it evident that it wouldn't take too long for the storm to arrive. "thanks aggy! sorry for calling you a bitch"

"if that isn't nice" jj grinned. "look at you! such a polite lady"

"told you i could behave better than you" you stood up and waited for him to do the same. "i'm pretty sure they just told you to go and get me not to wait out until they had finished the food, right?"

"caught me" jj shrugged. you knew him well enough to guess that he was trying to escape more work than necessary. "but it did take some time to find you. you weren't in the tower john b locked you in"

"oh, maybe i'm not as well behaved as we thought" you shrugged, following him back to the beach. "you need those sunglasses soon?" you liked the red tinted look of them. you had worn them before and you loved that they made you look like a hippie or vanessa hudgens going to coachella in 2014.

“keep ‘em,” jj shrugged, giving you an exaggerated once-over. “you look better in them anyway.”

you raised an eyebrow, genuinely curious. “how much did these cost?”

jj spun around, pretending to be offended. “whoa, whoa! don’t insult me like that. i didn’t pay for them.”

you laughed. “you stole these?”

“they were like six dollars, okay? i stole them out of principle.” he wiggled his eyebrows like that somehow made sense.

you shook your head amused. “jj, that’s still stealing.”

“nah, see, i was planning on giving them to you for a while, so really, it was a selfless act. call it proactive gift-giving.”

jj’s face lit up, the trademark smirk in place as you walked side by side back toward the beach. he kicked at the sand a little, glancing over at you every few seconds like he was waiting for you to laugh again.

you could hear the others before you saw them—john b shouting something about the toast burning, and kiara’s voice cutting through with, “how do you even burn toast?!”

“so, what’s the plan after we survive this gourmet meal?” you asked, your tone only half-teasing.

jj rubbed his hands together with a glint in his eyes. “well, after we feast on fancy toast and whatever leftovers kiara’s mom sent, i was thinking… poker.”

“poker? don’t we always lose when we play with pope?”

“yeah, but he’s working today, so we have a chance.” jj wiggled his eyebrows as if this were the best news in the world.

you laughed, shaking your head. “so, your plan is to take all my money after i generously agree to participate in poker?”

jj’s smirk deepened. “well, since you’re wearing those shades, you’re bound to win. you’ve got that poker-face-hippie thing going on.”

you shrugged, pretending to think about it. “true. i could absolutely bluff the hell out of you all.”

he nodded seriously. “exactly. so really, it’s your civic duty to play.”

“civic duty,” you repeated, laughing. “sure, sure.”

"sit down, you two" kiara ancouraged when you walked onto the patio.

"where have you been that long?" john b questioned, looking at you suspiciously. "you're always sneaking around together"

"don't be ridicilous, b" you shook your head. "we were just watching the waves"

kiara and jj exchanged glances you didn’t quite understand. it made your nerves tweak to not know what they were hinting at.

“i bet it was a sight so see” kiara said softly, a smirk on her face.

jj nodded. “as always” he shrugged, his eyes still on her.

you had to try hard not to let your face distort into jealousy. you had had a crush on jj for as long as you could remember. and the two of you were close, but nothing ever really happened with your brothers best friend.

being in love with jj was confusing. most of the time, he treated you just like anyone else, acting completely normal. but then, out of nowhere, he'd start flirting, leaving you unsure of what to think.

even though you tried your best, the crush on the boy always resurfaced when he would flirt with you once more, keeping your hopes up.

the meal continued without anything happening and you found yourselves cleaning the table to play a few rounds of poker like jj had promised.

"looks like you're in a tough spot" he grinned.

kiara had put down her cards, while you were trying hard to keep a straight face, knowing you would probably lose.

you shrugged. "i don't see you putting down anything valuable, maybank"

"ohh" kiara and your brother hollored at the same time.

"well, let's see then" kiara nudged jj's shoulder.

the blonde smirked before he revealed his cards to you, flushing a street. "you've underestimated me, guys"

john b and you sighed simultaneously, accepting defeat as you threw your own cards in the middle. while jj was busy mixing the cards, kiara took a look at her phone.

"i think i better head out" she smiled, standing up from her chair. "my mother's gonna go crazy if i'm late again"

you played a few more rounds after the girl had left, john b and you losing to jj each time. you were sure he had gotten help from pope, knowing that his time would come.

john b threw down his cards after one more uneventful round. "i'm heading to bed" he nodded, pulling his snapback down, before he highfived jj and pressed a kiss to your hair. "don't stay up too late"

"night, b" you smiled as you watched after him.

"one more round?" jj giggled.

"i'm all out" you shrugged, pointing at the pile of money on the table in front of him.

"well, if i lose you can have all of it"

"this sounds almost too good" you muttered. "okay, what if i lose then?"

"you'll take off your shirt" he shrugged.

"jj!" you pushed a hand to your mouth, draining out the scream of outrage that threatened to errupt in the air between you.

"what?" jj smirked, looking up at you with wide blue eyes. "am i making you nervous?"

"not a chance," you shot back, trying to keep your voice steady despite the way your heart was hammering in your chest. jj's smirk widened, the mischievous glint in his eyes only growing as he shuffled the cards one more time.

"alright then," he said, dealing the cards smoothly. "prove it."

you glanced at your hand, trying to keep your expression neutral. jj's eyes flickered up to meet yours, watching you intently, and you couldn't tell if he was bluffing or not.

you took a deep breath and played the first card, trying to focus on the game instead of the way jj was watching you like a hawk.

the next few minutes were tense, each of you placing cards with care. it was almost suffocating.

"you're really dragging this out, you know that?" you muttered, glancing up at him.

jj just grinned, his eyes glinting with amusement. "patience, sweetheart. good things come to those who wait," he replied, his voice low and teasing. you rolled your eyes but couldn't help the slight tug at the corners of your mouth.

finally, it came down to the last card. you had one left in your hand, and so did jj. your eyes met, the room silent except for the sound of your heartbeat in your ears. You hesitated for a split second, then threw down your card.

jj's eyes flickered to the table, his face breaking into a triumphant grin. he laid his final card down with a laugh.

"looks like i win," he drawled, his voice smug. your eyes widened as you stared at the cards, disbelief washing over you. how did he keep doing this?

"you've got to be cheating," you grumbled, pushing back from the table. jj laughed, the sound warm, filling the quiet night air around you.

"well, you agreed to do this" he shrugged, like he was completely in the right.

you looked at him without any expression on your face, before you sighed, your fingers dipping down to meet the material of your shirt, as you stood up.

jj's eyes widened at your movement, standing up at the same time. "it was a joke, y/n" he muttered quickly. "you don't have to do anything you don't want to"

you halted in your movement. "if you had won, would you have given me the money, like you promised?"

"of course" jj answered without so much as a thought.

your smile deepend, before your fingers gripped the hem of the shirt, pulling it over you head in a quick motion. revealed was your bikini top. the one jj had seen you in a million times, but still his eyes widened even further.

jj's mouth opened slightly, his usual cocky demeanor vanishing as he stared at you. he remembered seeing you in it before, but this still felt different. maybe it was the intimacy of the dimly lit patio, or the way you stood before him now, your eyes steady and unwavering. you had called his bluff, and he was utterly speechless.

"see?" you said, trying to keep your voice light despite the rapid thudding of your heart. "no big deal. just a bikini, jj."

he swallowed hard, finally snapping out of his daze. "right," he said, his voice cracking slightly. he cleared his throat, his gaze darting away before quickly finding its way back to you. "just a bikini."

you walked around the table, pushing yourself between him and the discarded chair. "this can't really be the reason you're so uneasy"

you tried to read the emotion on his face, but he just looked at you, at a loss for words. you softly pushed your hand to rest against his chest. your eyes widened in surprise. "your heart is racing" you declared with a soft whisper.

"yeah" jj finally found his words. "you're so close"

you looked up at him, surprised at what he was hinting at. "i'm sorry if i'm making you uncomfortable" you tried to step back, but his hand shot out, holding you in place by your elbow.

"jj" you muttered, your voice barely audible. you could feel your heart beat just as fast as his did.

"have i ever told you how beautiful you are?" jj's voice was soft and tender, like he was trying not to disrupt the calmness of the moment.

"no" you sighed, unsure. he came closer, your noses were almost touching. his eyes were ready to close, not far from kissing you. your voice rung out before he could do anything of that sort. "what about kie?"

"what?" jj blinked in surprise, stepping backwards.

"what about kie?" you repeated a little bit louder.

"what about her?" jj laughed, before he saw the confusion in your eyes.

"i thought there was something—“

"between me and kie?" he smiled, shaking his head. "well only that she knew about my crush on you"

"you have a crush on me?"

"i thought it was kinda obvious" he pointed a finger between the both of you. "can i please finally kiss you now, routledge?"

you smiled, your heart fluttering in your chest at his confession. "of course" you watched him step closer once more, before you grinned. "but what about—?"

"—oh would you shut up now?" he pushed his lips against yours, drowning out your giggle as your smile touched his mouth like it was supposed to.

[writingouthere]

bestfriendsbrother!Sukuna x pregnant!reader one-shot

summary: you're excited to finally share with all your friends that your pregnant when the party is interrupted by your best friend's older brother, who you didn't invite, but who you did have unprotected sex with less than two months ago.

cw: reader is pregnant, Sukuna is a bad dude, possessive behavior, minor smut, still as usual nicer than it sounds because I can't help it.

**************

"I'm pregnant!"

Your news is met with a period of silence before your friends look at each other, uncertain as to how to react.

Nobara finally breaks the silence, an eyebrow raised. "And we feel...."

"We're happy about it," you say and your friends are then quick to congratulate you. You hear some sort of scuffling happening behind you and you turn around to see Yuuji unfolding a "We're having a Baby!" banner which makes Megumi nearly jump out of his chair.

"Holy shit, did you two-"

"No!"

"Ew, no!"

Yuuji frowns at you. "The 'ew' wasn't necessary."

You and Nobara scoff. "It was," you tell him. "And I say that with all my love."

"Okay, so if this idiot didn't knock you up-"

"Hey!"

"-then who did?"

You'd been expecting the question and had prepared for it. "It was just a one night stand, he's not really father material." Everyone looks like they want to ask more questions so you smile at them, genuinely happy they all look ready to commit a crime for you. "It's okay, I have a good job and this is something I've wanted for a long time. This baby will be really loved because it will have me and, I hope, all of you."

Your friends are quick to agree and there's some lighter questions about potential names, nurseries and Nobara and Todo are looking at her phone debating baby onesies, when the door to you and Yuuji's apartment opens and someone you had definitely not invited comes in.

"Sukuna! You're late, you missed the big news," Yuuji calls out as he walks over and claps his brother on the back. A few people call out greetings as Yuuji's older brother looks around the apartment. His eyes linger on you for a second, a smirk tugging up on his lip before he notices the sign hanging crooked over the kitchen doorway and he laughs without an ounce of humor.

"You've gotta be fucking kidding me, you knocked someone up? You irresponsible piece of shit-"

"It's not his and don't kill him, you asshole," Megumi says from where he has now joined the onesies discussion and points over at you. "It's the other person who lives here."

Sukuna pauses from where he was about to murder his brother, to look back over at you. You wonder if his brain is doing the same cursed math that you had done when you were hyperventilating, holding a stick covered in your own pee, but before he could ask anything, Maki ended the silent stand off.

"And we're happy about it, so get happy you piece of shit."

With that, the party continues on, people breaking off until little groups and snacks being placed strategically throughout the apartment.

You're feeling thirsty, and a little exhausted from the burning stare that's been directed at you for the past hour when you excuse yourself from where Miwa and Mechamaru had been talking about their own future plans for children, who you're sure would be socially inept but gorgeous enough to make up for it, and made your way to the kitchen.

You were pulling out some water, no alcohol for you even though you really needed it, when you felt someone's presence behind you.

"So when were you going to tell me we were having a baby?"

"Never, because it's not yours," you answered firmly, slamming the door to the fridge for good measure. Sukuna leaned against the cabinet next to you but you'd known him long enough to see the pose for what it was. A ruse, a performance of casualness. The fingers on his hand tapped against his arm like he was playing the piano, one of the few tics he had that showed when he was feeling, well just feeling anything in general.

"Oh please, you're not fucking anyone else."

"You don't know that and we're not fucking, we fucked once. Singular, past tense."

He laughed and looked down at you, the same predatory look he'd had the night he'd helped you make this child.

"And once was all it took huh? Fucked you so good, you're going to have my baby," he says, voice mocking and he stands up to his full height which puts him over you. He takes the glass of water you're really regretting now, and places it on the counter opposite the two of you.

"It-it's not your baby," but you don't sound sure and he knows it and he presses up against you until your back is to the counter. Nowhere for you to run.

"It's mine, just like you're mine. I don't know who you think you're kidding with this denial of me but it's done now, sweetheart."

You go to answer him and Sukuna covers your mouth with his hand like the rude fuck he is and then leans down, his mouth next to your ear. You look around, worried someone might see you but the gap between the fridge and the counter conceals you both and the room next to you keeps getting louder and louder. The sun had set and there were maybe some lamps in the living room, but here in the kitchen it was dark.

"I let you have your space and your time, two months of it actually. I let you have your little moral crisis about fucking a criminal and it being the best dick you've ever had wah wah, but I was impatient before I knew you were having my baby, and now," he leans back so his eyes, and they're on fire his eyes, are level with yours. "I'm done waiting."

You tug on Sukuna's hand and he rolls his eyes before removing it from your mouth and places it on your hip which doesn't seem like a good trade-off but at least you can speak again.

"What does that even mean?" You ask him, your voice showing the incredulity you're feeling but if Sukuna had anything, it was audacity.

"I mean I'll give you a week to tell your friends you're having our baby and that we're getting married." He says it so seriously that you can't help but laugh which seems to be the wrong response when his other hand moves to your hip as well and squeezes, tight.

"We are not getting married, are you out of your mind?"

"Why not, we're already having a baby, are you going to deny me the ability to live with my own child."

"Still not your kid, and we can't get married Sukuna. We never even dated! We fucked one time, that doesn't mean we should just be together forever."

"We fucked for one night, it was more than one time-"

"Not the argument you think it is," you interrupt him but you still let him pick you up and place you on the counter. You sit there while he runs his hands up and down your thighs, the sounds of the party washing over the two of you as you stay in your little bubble.

"We'd be good together," he finally says. "Not just because I knocked you up on the first try." You hit him but he just smirks and moves his hands more purposefully on your legs. You let him pull them apart and step between them even though warning bells are going off in your head, telling you these are moves you'd seen before and they had led to you being in the predicament the two of you were debating in the first place.

"It's inevitable, the two of us. You can say you hate me, or that I'm not a good man, and that's true. But there's a reason why you've never stayed with any of those nice boys," he says and his hands slips up the skirt you're wearing to get at your bare thighs underneath. "Because you don't want a nice guy, you don't want a good man, you want me and I'm too selfish to let you keep torturing both of us by doing this pretending shit."

The fingers on his right hand press against your cunt through your panties while his other hand squeezes your thigh and he moans sinfully into the quiet air.

"God, I knew I didn't make up this warm, wet cunt. Been fucking my fist until I chafed the past two months just thinking about it."

You whimper as he moves your underwear aside and slips one finger up and down your slit, not touching your clit or going where you want him, but doing enough that you move against his hand.

"This does not mean that we should get married," you protest and he teases a finger against your opening, pulling it back when your hips tilt up in an attempt to get him where you want.

"Why not? I heard pregnant women get super horny, what are you going to do without me around to make sure this filthy pussy gets stuffed just the way she needs." He finally slips one finger in, his thumb moving to tease against your clit, just the way you like it and your head smacks back against the cabinet. He moves the hand that had been on your thigh up so he can cradle your head.

"I'm sure I could find someone willing to help me out," you say scoffing and his hand freezes which makes you whine a little and try to get him to move again but his legs limit your range of motion.

"You ever try to fuck someone else ever again and the coroner is going to have to get dental records to figure out who the dumb fuck with no fingers, no eyes and no cock is, you got it?"

He's not joking, you know he's not joking but it doesn't stop you from leaning forward until you finally get your lips on his. He hums into your kiss, cupping your cheek in his free hand while the other one goes back to opening you up. You're so wet that the kitchen fills with the sounds of his him finger fucking your cunt but you can't even find it in yourself to be embarrassed. He's not wrong that pregnancy has made you more sensitive, or maybe it's just you not having gotten laid since the two of you had slept together.

He's got three fingers in you when you come and he swallows your moans greedily with mouth while his fingers slow inside of you, curving just right to make you think you could probably come again soon, oversensitive or not.

Before you can test that out, he pulls away from you. He licks the fingers he pulled out of you clean and you you're reminded of how the last time he'd made you come twice just with his mouth.

"Where are you going?" you ask him, a little more breathless than you like.

"We are going home," he tells you, grabbing your hands and helping you down off the counter. Giving you a kiss on your forehead that you would tease him for if you were anyone else.

"Home?" you ask, confused because you are currently standing in your apartment unless his orgasms suddenly give one the power to teleport.

"Yeah, our home, not the shitty apartment you share with my brother. I mean we'll have to get somewhere bigger soon, for our baby."

For the first time since you found out you were pregnant, someone who was not you laid out their palm on your still just the same stomach. There was no change from how it always looked but Sukuna looked smug just the same and you felt like you were still missing a few things.

"What-"

"I mean I can fuck you here, I just thought your sensibilities and the fact your friends were all out there would make you uncomfortable."

Your post orgasm flush finally leaves you and you look up at him in panic. "Oh my god, do you think someone saw-"

"It's okay, Fushiguro kept them out I'm sure."

You don't want to know but ask anyway. "Why?"

"Because he walked in earlier and looked like he'd seen a ghost. Tell me, is the kid still a virgin? He's pretty but I can't imagine he has a lot of good options in your crowd."

When you leave to go to Sukuna's, the only people who don't look confused(or horrified in Yuuji's case) at your departure are Maki and Megumi.

If the confusion hadn't been cleared up by the time the baby came, the pink hair probably answered any follow up questions.

dealing with some writer's block and had this idea. didn't feel like writing a whole smut scene, my b but saving that energy for the next(?) neighborsukuna x singlemom one.

side note: Megumi is scarred for life, for sure. Yuuji gets over his horror once he's an uncle.