#please don't ask me how much time i spent on this i'll cry

[sarathrwizard]

7 Day Camp Stay. Breaking camp.

Yay! This is it! Got the art done and everything!

Kind of sad it had to end so soon...

Thank you all for commenting, leaving hearts and just reading it in general!

Hope you enjoy the last day! (Under the cut)

7 Day Camp Stay

Breaking camp:

Donnie woke up bright and early. 5:00 in the morning! ... just kidding he slept till 9:45. But this was it! It was packing day. He got out of bed and gathered his stuff together. Donnie checked his phone and the weather said it'd get pretty windy around 2:00 this afternoon. Best that they got the tents down before then.

Donnie went outside to find breakfast. I mean, his breakfasts have consisted of many things. But three times it had something to do with bread and cheese. Surely he would have something different,  right?

So there he was, eating cheese... and bread... boy there wasn't many choices, was there? He didn't care, he'd be home soon enough where he could eat whatever his heart desired. We all know what that is.

The others were starting to crawl out of their cocoons. There wasn't anything planned for the day. If anything, they planned to get home before supper.

About an hour later, unpacking was in full swing. Chairs were being folded up and sleeping bags were being rolled. Mikey spent his time making lunch so that everyone could have the energy. Donnie walked over to the restrooms one last time.

*Flush* went the toilet as he opened the stall door. We walked over to the sink to wash up. Boy, whoever was in here last left a huge mess around the sink. How can you even spill that much water? Donnie was practically stepping in an inch deep puddle in front of the sink. He pocketed the soap and looked underneath the sink to see one of the pipes leaking.

"That would do it."

Donnie confirming to himself. He would fix it if he had his tools. Donnie stood back up to see a giant garden spider right on the lip of the sink, slowly crawling closer to his hand. In a panic, he ripped his hand away with full force, throwing his body weight from one direction to the other way too quickly. His foot slipped from under him and he landed smack dab on the tiled floor. Right onto his bruised hip.

Donnie quickly got up and slid himself away from the sink. Leaning himself on the wall, he checked his hip. Whatever had healed from the last time he bruised it, just got reset. But this time it felt like it hurt worse. Maybe because tile doesn't give like dirt does. Tears were escaping his eyes once more.

"EVERY! SINGLE! DAY!"

Donnie yelled. The walls yelled back at him. Sobs escaped his throat as tears flowed down his face.

"...Why can't I go through one day without getting hurt?"

Donnies voice cracked. Tears dripping off his chin, adding to the already large puddle on the restroom floor. Just then, the door opened. An orange colored coat sleeve poked through.

"Hey, Donnie! I just came to tell you-"

Mikey cut himself off when he saw the distress on Donnie's face, the way he was slouched against the wall, and how he wrapped his hands around his hip. Mikey quickly came over and crouched down.

"Hey, what's wrong, Donnie? Does your hip hurt again?"

Donnie being babied by his baby brother? This was priceless. Donnie needed to keep it together! Cause if he continued to cry, Mikey would start crying too! He tried, he really tried! But he didn't have the energy to tough it out. More tears started dripping from his eyes. He could feel his little brother getting worried. Mikeys fingers tightened, gripping harder to Donnie's coat sleeve.

"I'll be fine."

Donnie said through a sigh.

"Just, please help me get up, okay?"

Donnie asked as politely as he could. Mikey grabbed onto his arm and helped pull him up. He put some weight onto his leg and, yup! It hurt like the dickens! Whoever they are...

Donnie and Mikey slowly made it back to camp, limping along the way. They turned the corner to see the others finishing their lunch. Donnie looked over at Mikey.

"Don't tell the others about my hip."

Donnie whispered. Mikey creased his brow. But Donnie's eyes had a sense of pleading in them.

"Please."

Mikey gently nodded. Donnie got onto his own two feet and tried not to limp as much as he could. Mikey and Donnie made it to the picnic table and sat down to eat. It looked like it was turkey sandwiches one last time. There was so much running around in Donnie's head, he could barely eat. Every bite felt like it was going to choke him.

Mikey must have seen him struggle. He reached out and gently grabbed Donnie's hand. Donnie gripped back harder every time he swallowed. Mikey had finished his sandwich already. He grabbed a cup and filled it with drinking water, then handed it over for Donnie. If Donnie couldn't swallow the food, then he'd wash it down instead.

Lunch felt like it took twice as long to finish. But he got it done, with some emotional support on the side. Leo and Raph were getting more of the stuff packed away. Donnie lifted himself from the table.

"Let me do the dishes."

Donnie said as he got back onto his feet.

"Are you sure?"

Mikey asked, tilting his head slightly. Donnie nodded and got the stuff ready. He started scrubbing, feeling his hip scream in protest. He tried his best to ignore it. He had to ignore it! He wanted to be useful! To help with packing up anyway he could.

The winds started to pick up. Was it 2-o-clock already? Donnie picked his phone up to check the time. It was only 12:40. The winds came early! Donnie looked up to see the others having a heyday with folding up the tents. As Leo and Raph were trying to fold up the tent, Mikey was just having fun wearing the tent fly as a cape.

The pain in Donnie's hip was only getting worse and worse. He could barely stand anymore. Raph was walking by with the tent all folded up and packed tightly into it's zipper bag. Raph must have gotten the big brother tingles again cause he stopped and looked over at Donnie.

"Hey, you doing okay?"

Raph asked as he placed the tent bag down on the picnic bench.

"Yup! Just peachy! Totally not in excruciating pain right now!"

Donnie said through gritted teeth. Raph looked down to see the bruise on Donnie's hip had spread down his leg and looked much darker than it did yesterday. Raph grabbed Donnie under the arms and lifted him up. Donnie wiggled his legs and flapped his hands.

"Hey- no! I'm almost done with the dishes anyway! Just let me finish them!"

Donnie argued, though it wasn't very convincing. Mikey quickly took over doing the dishes. Leo grabbed the tent bag and brought it to the Taxi rockets trunk. Raph carried Donnie over to the car and sat him down in the back seats.

"When did your bruise get that bad?"

Raph asked, his brow creasing. Donnie looked at Raph. Dang, he just wanted to cry again. He hated it when Raph acted like their Dad. But telling Raph what happened was probably a better idea then keeping it bottled up.

"Earlier this morning. Slipped in the bathroom."

"Why didn't ya say anything? I could have handled the dishes!"

"I wanted to be useful! I wanted to help with packing! Not sit on the sidelines because my hip hurt again..."

Donnie hugged his stomach. These emotions were just churning inside of him today! Practically building a home in there! He rubbed his hands together. He felt a hand lay on his shoulder.

"I get it. But there's no harm in asking for help when you need it. That's what I'm here for!"

Donnie looked up at Raph and wiped away a few stray tears with his sleeves. Raph gave him a few pats on the shoulder.

"You can hang tight, we're about done with the packing anyway."

Raph got up to finish breaking camp. Donnie got into his seat properly and leaned his head back. He got some of the dishes done. At least he help with something.

...

The four of them were in the car and had just started on their journey back. Raph was driving, Mikey got the front seat cause he called dibs, so Leo was stuck in the back with Donnie. Donnie was reading on his phone while gently laying his hand onto his bruised hip.

Drip! Drip! Drip! Water sprinkled onto the windshield. Rain? But there was no rain predicted for today? The trickle got heavier and heavier. All conversations stopped. The cabin went silent as all eyes were glued onto the road. The rain was so heavy you could barely see 3 feet in front of you, and it was still daylight!

Donnies stomach clenched as he nervously clung onto the back of the front seat. Raph seamed like he was going to power through it! The Car suddenly swerved. Donnie's heart dropped into his stomach. Oh, the adrenaline was kicking in now!

"What did you do that for!?"

Leo asked as he leaned forward.

"There was a big tree branch on the road. I didn't want to hit it."

Raph said as he kept his attention on the road ahead. Donnie groaned nervously. Leo looked over to see Donnie gripping onto the front seat with his head leaning against it. Donnies cheeks were pinker than usual. that wasn't a good sign.

"Raph, pull over and turn on the hazards."

"Don't worry! Raph's got this!"

"Raph! Please...!"

Raph gripped the steering wheel. He did as told and slowed down to pull over, Flipping on the hazards. Leo unbuckled himself to get closer to Donnie. He wrapped his arms around Donnie and let him lean his head onto his shoulder. Donnie knew it was a mistake to read in a moving vehicle. It always make his stomach turn. But that sudden jolt only made it worse.

The wind knocked against the car, making it slightly sway. Donnie could hear Mikey start to whimper. But Raph was already on top of it. Raph adjusted the seat back to make room for Mikey. Mikey unbuckled and hopped into Raphs lap.

The rain consisted of a shower head on full blast and literal buckets being dumped. Donnie's heart felt like it could start a moter. Fear was creeping around him again. Donnie folded his hands together and closed his eyes. He began to pray. He prayed for so many things. He prayed they would get back home safe. That no one would get hurt. That the roads wouldn't be flooded. He prayed that the pain in his hip would go away. That his stomach would settle down. He just kept on praying.

After a few minutes, the rain began to slow down and the wind calmed slightly. Donnie opened his eyes when he heared the engine starting. He looked around to see the rain was much more gentle now. His stomach felt better too. Leo buckled himself into the middle seat to stay near Donnie. Mikey had crawled back onto his seat and got secured.

They got back onto the road and continued on their way. Donnie sighed and released his hands from his death grip. Boy, his palms were sweaty! Donnie couldn't wait to get home and have some pizza. Donnie's sure the others wouldn't deny him of it. He laid his head a little further on Leo's shoulder and got more comfortable for the journey home.

The end.

_____________

Oh my goodness, that camping trip was relaxing and exhausting all at the same time!

I hope you enjoyed reading, 7 Day Camp Stay!

Lord bless all of you! And thank you again for you comments and likes!

*little happy dance!*

Last

[chaikajpeg]

elias with deer antlers

References:

"Mature red deer stag", photo by Bill Ebsen, taken 26. september 2009 in Jægersborg Dyrehave in Denmark (if that tells you anything)

2. T-Michael (a tailor and a founder of a fashion label if i'm not mistaken)

also, i hate cropping my drawings and could not decide what version to choose in the end, so please have both

[bratphilia]

overtime (m. schmidt x reader)

request: "Hey ! Just discovered your account and I love your writtings ! I was wondered if you could write a smut and romantic thing with mike ? I dont have any specific context and all its up to you ! <3"

note: ty sm for showing love to my work and for requesting!! i finally was able to write something actually sweet with mike for the first time lmao.

pairing: mike schmidt x reader

tags: small age gap, fingering, missionary

after putting abby to sleep, you fell asleep yourself in front of the tv. you couldn't help it! it was a long night of cooking spaghetti for abby (and ordering pizza, per her request), helping her build a fort, and coloring with her inside it. abby's a sweet kid, but babysitting has always tired you out in general. plus her older brother, your boss, started working the graveyard shift at his new job, so it would be unfeasible for you to not go to sleep during your time spent over there.

you woke up to the chair next to you being shifted in, and open your eyes to see mike sitting there, running a hand through his hair with a sigh. you feel embarrassed that you fell asleep on the job and quickly explain yourself. "i'm so sorry for falling asleep, i was just—"

he looks at you. "no need to apologize. i don't expect you to wait all night long for me."

awkward silence fills the air. well, that settles that. god, he's so cute, you think, even all stressed out and with bags under his eyes. he's also been nothing but kind to you since the two of you met. always concerned with how you're doing, how school is holding up, and just generally about your wellbeing. you try to do reciprocate as it's obvious mike doesn't have a lot of people in his life doing the same for him.

you're the first to break the silence. "uhm, there's leftover pizza in the fridge... you know, in case you want any..." you comment, not quite sure what else to say to him.

"oh! thank you," he says. "did abby ask you to..."

"make her spaghetti and order pizza? yes, she absolutely did."

both you and mike laugh. "i'll make sure i can pay you back for that. you really didn't have to—"

"mike," you interrupt, "seriously, don't worry about it. i understand your situation and i want to help you."

mike looks at you gratefully, almost lovingly.

"y'know—"

"so, i should really—"

the both of you talk at the same time. "oh, sorry, you go."

you smile gently. "no, you go. i was just going to say i should hit the road."

he runs a hand through his hair again, eyes darting across the room bashfully. "well i — uh, i just wanted to say thank you for all you do for abby... and for me. it means a lot. you're very... kind."

your smile widens at his awkward choice of words, but it deeply touches you that he appreciates you. you place a hand on top of his. "of course, mike. i'm always here for you."

mike looks at your hand and inhales deeply through his nose. "will you — will you stay for just a little while longer?"

before you know it he's on top of you on the couch, slamming his middle and ring finger inside you while you bite back moans. "gotta be nice and quiet for me, sweetheart. can't wake abby up, okay? or else i gotta stop and neither of us want that," he whispers to you sweetly.

instead of letting you respond, mike presses his lips against yours in a deep kiss while he continues to finger you. you break apart to quietly call his name, letting him know that you're close.

much to your dismay, he pulls his fingers out before you can come. "mike, please," you whisper.

"please, what, honey?" he teases.

you squeeze your thighs together, trying to relieve the tension in your core. "please fuck me already."

mike presses his forehead against yours, breathing sharply as he slowly pushes inside you, inch by inch. you bite your lip to keep yourself from crying out as your pussy swallows his hard length.

as he begins to move, he also clearly struggles to keep his noises to a minimum. as a solution, he envelopes you in a kiss as he moves inside you. his pace gradually increases from gentle to faster. the feeling is absolutely delicious.

he can feel your pussy spasming around him and his own dick pulsing too. he uses the hand caging you in on the couch to hold yours as he continues to fuck you.

"feel so good around me, baby," he whispers hotly. "you have no idea what you — ngh — do to me. every time i see you i always think about fucking you like this."

"mike," you moan quietly. his words only encouraged you.

his name becomes a whispered chant falling from your lips as he fucks you through your own orgasm. he's sure to pull out and come on your stomach while he pumps himself.

mike wipes the sweat off of his forehead and sits up so your legs lay over his lap. "sorry for pushing you into overtime," he jokes.

you give a small laugh. "no worries. it was my pleasure."

mike shakes his head at your dumb joke. then his smile fades and he looks at you seriously. "is it... too early to say that i love you?"

you lean up and meet his lips in a kiss as your answer.

[predestinatos]

you mean everything - MV1 ೀ⋆｡🌷

summary: max needed a wedding date and you were used to being his fake partner.

tags: max verstappen x fem!reader, fake dating, friends to lovers, max is so whipped, fluff, a bit angsty maybe?, mentions of alcohol

word count: 2k

notes: i've been writing (and thinking) so much about max... my period is coming please give me a break i'm sensitive. also would love to get some feedback if possible so i know if it's worth making a series out of this!!!!

"If you want to make it believable at least hold my hand" you half-whispered to Max, who was buttoning his blazer while getting out of the car, you behind him.

"Sorry, I'm not used to this with you" he said chuckling. His sweaty palm held yours tightly, and the feeling of it was odd. Knowing Max for so long meant that these romantic gestures felt almost cringeworthy to you both, and you both had to put up award winning performances every time you played this game.

The game in question being fake-dating. It started as a funny joke where you both thought it would be great to test out the Get A Champagne Bottle For Free At This Restaurant If You Propose theory (which worked, by the way). From then onwards, you used each other as dates whenever asked by annoying family members, creepy coworkers, or just because you felt like lying.

The talking wasn't hard - you both felt comfortable in that part, lying with words coming off almost dangerously natural - but when it came to acting the part, both of you felt awkward, like kids who found relationships absolutely repulsive.

This time, though, the performance would last longer than usual: it was a wedding. Max's friend's wedding. Max could've just gone along, or bring a friend (even you as a friend). Yet he had told his friend, after one too many shots on his Bachelor's Party, and after being chosen as The Guy Who'll Take the Longest to Settle, that he had, in fact, a girlfriend. His friends didn't believe him, so he showed a picture of you two together - a selfie really, nothing much. And they still said they didn't believe it. So here you are.

You couldn't blame him, even if you wanted to. You agreed to use each other as a fake partner for as long as you could in as many situations as required, although when it all started none of you ever thought it would lead to wedding attendances.

So now there you were, Max's hand on yours, entering the small church. His eyes locked with the groom, who waved and called for you to sit near the altar.

"So you ARE real" he said, nervousness laced in his voice even as he tried to lighten the mood himself. You giggled at the irony of it, nodding as you said your congratulations.

"Just wait until the guys see this" he continued gesturing towards the bench where 3 other men around his age sat. Men you had seen before in some Instagram pictures, men you spent the previous night trying to memorize basic information about so you didn't sound suspicious.

Max's hand now fell on your waist almost instinctively - it wasn't instinctively, he told himself once he noticed its positioning. And if it was, it was only because he took this so seriously, almost as a sort of method acting. Sitting down next to his friends, he noticed how all of them seemed surprised at your presence, and something like pride filled his chest. He loved winning, loved being right even if he was lying; but most especially, he loved how jealous other men seemed to be over the fact that he was (at least in their minds) dating you.

He couldn't deny - though he tried, really - that you two looked good together. His rougher features mixed with your softer ones gave you both an aura of near unreachability, which yes, was pretentious of him to think but he thought nevertheless.

The ceremony was quick and endearing, a smile spread across everyone's faces at the shared loved between the bride and the groom. As the crowd clapped, Max leaned into you, "don't tell me you're crying". "I am, just to think that I'll have to keep pretending to date YOU for the next 10 hours" you replied, his mocking smile recognizing the joke.

The reception hall was beautifully decorated with shades of soft green and violet orchids. Max tried not to think about how much it matched the shade of your dress, how you looked like you had come to life from a classical novel. He tried to feel like anyone but Mr. Darcy as you felt so much like Elisabeth Bennett to him.

Sitting down next to him, you found this part easier - mingling and socializing was something you enjoyed more than he did - especially with alcohol in the mix. It's a wedding, you thought; this is what weddings are for.

So you drank the wine with the main course and sipper champagne to celebrate and ordered a few cocktails when it was time to dance and talk - and you felt it on your body almost as much as you felt Max's hand occasionally sitting on your thigh, but not even close to how strongly you felt his thumb caress your skin as he did so. Truth was, he too was drunk; his eyes looked smaller and his cheeks were flushed, and the amount of times he ran a hair through his dirty blonde hair had caused it to look messier. As you looked at him, you felt he never looks as attractive as when he is like this - loose and carefree, his shirt sleeves rolled up and a smile on his face when he notices people laugh at his joke.

"I have to admit I didn't think it was true" his friend said when Max left to go to the bathroom. He looked drunker than the two of you combined, his words hard to decypher, like a riddle. "He's been talking about you for months now and we never saw you for real so we thought you didn't exist" he laughed, and you laughed back before it registered.

"Months?" you asked him, eyebrows furrowed yet attempting to remain composed. You shouldn't have asked it - a supposedly month old girlfriend wouldn't be surprised but you were his fake month old girlfriend and you weren't understanding it anymore.

"Yeah. He talks about you so much all the time I think even we started to date you" he laughed again, yet this time you didn't find the joke so funny. You were frozen in your seat, merely blinking as if trying to put the confusing puzzle together, the pieces not quite fitting the way you thought they would.

A touch on your shoulder unfroze you, almost like magic, like a disney film come to life. You turned around to find the groom, somewhat sober, smiling at you while also looking somewhat concerned. "He's calling for you... And he's also absolutely wasted" he said, pointing to the door of the hall.

"Shit" you cursed, getting up from your seat at a speed you couldn't believe, worry filling your heart, making you forget the conversation you were just having.

Opening the door to the garden outside, you found Max sitting down against the wall, shirt partly unbuttoned and disheveled hair. When he saw you, he grinned, such genuine happiness laced with tipsiness.

"Lightweight" you mocked as you crouched in front of him, trying to balance yourself on your heels, somehow managing it despite your own drunkness.

"You're laughing at my mis- Shit- my misery" his throat bobbed up and down, exaggerating his own agony with a hand on his chest and another on his forehead like a Shakespeare character.

"I have to admit it's quite fun sometimes" you bit your lip as you fixed his hair as best as you could, hands brushing through its soft, blonde mess.

"You're so– you're so sweet" he said, his words dragged and messy. He brought a beer bottle to his lips but you stopped him before any liquid touched them.

"I think that's enough of that for tonight" you grabbed it and placed it behind you, sitting in front of him.

"See now... Now you're being mean" his hand grabbed a strand of your hair and played with it softly as he pouted.

"Okay big boy I'm gonna get you some water" you say, getting up once again, yet his hand stops you, grabbing your wrist tightly.

You looked at him, startled. His drunken state is visible, and it felt frustrating that you had to be the one sobering up for him. The music vibrated through the wall he leaned against, somehow tickling him, making him giggle.

"Stay," he managed to say, eyes half closed, "I'm so glad we're- Fuck things are spinning so much" his hands rushed to his eyes and his head hung low, "Ah fuck. I'm so glad we're datin- Fuck, no, oops-" he continued laughing despite how sick he felt, the whole situation sounding hilarious when filtered through alcohol.

You giggled along with him, mostly because you wanted to see if you could convince him to move, scared he might feel worse or pass out on the cold floor if he doesn't do so. "Fake dating. Fake dating, I know. I knowww" he continued, his words dragged and his finger pointing at you before poking your nose with such innocent sweetness you were taken aback.

"Max" you tried to sound more assertive but found it hard to do so, your own intoxicated state making the situation lighter than what it actually was. Your heart racing was a symptom of it, one you wouldn't feel if sobriety was an option, you thought. Max's eyes wouldn't seem to stare at you differently were he sober as well, and the way he scanned your features, his gaze staying on your lips for longer than expected, wouldn't affect you in the slightest had you not drank some alcohol.

"I like it when you say my name" he looked up at you innocently, pleading, almost.

"Want me to say it again?" you asked, smiling. You complied with these demands because you knew they were childish whims of an intoxicated man, his happiness a priority in times like these. Upon his nod, you started saying his name, half teasingly, half reassuringly, the leaves rustling in the garden behind you.

"Max... Max!! Max Max-"

He shouldn't. It would complicate things, and he liked when they were simple, clean and organized. He knew he shouldn't even when his whole vision spun and his brain convinced him that he should do things he would never do otherwise. But every time he refrained from saying something he would stumble across all his words and trip and fall and his head would only hurt more, and it seemed as if he could only focus if he kept listening to you and talking to you and looking at you.

The lights shone behind you in a way that made it feel as though he was dreaming, like you were a mirage, too good to be true. Maybe his friends were right - you weren't actually real. He wanted to be sure, in that moment. That you were real and that he wanted you as much as he thought. And though he shouldn't, though it was a terrible idea, he couldn't help but lean over to kiss you.

He tasted like champagne - bubbly and slightly sweet, his movements sloppy given his state, yet you couldn't help but drink it all in. Part of you - a big part - reciprocated the kiss, felt his fingers on the side of your neck, pulling you messily towards him, and tried to steady him, guiding him gently with your own lips.

It was odd, how this felt so right yet the fake hand holding didn't. As Max kissed you, that thought entered his clouded mind - did it feel wrong because it was fake and this was real? Your skin felt so soft, so much softer now he could touch it freely and unapologetically.

"Fuck-" he started, pulling away, his head resting against the wall once again as he stared at you, noticing how it hasn't hit you yet; what you just did, how it affected everything. "I fucking love you" he shrugged as you fixed your hair, pausing with arms raised for a few seconds before smiling softly.

"You're drunk" you replied, looking at his own grin, the gleam in his eyes making him appear both innocent and guilty of so many things.

"I'm drunk and I fucking love you"

"Max..." you started, and he said your name back to you with such tenderness you couldn't believe his lips tasted of alcohol earlier and not something sweet.

"We'll talk tomorrow, okay?" you continued, waiting for the silence to swallow you both.

[changisworld]

“Are you being serious?”

Fuckboy!hyunjin x reader

Word count;8,001

Summary: You & Hyunjin are finally moving into a positive direction, finals are now here though so you are both trying to focus on that, meaning you both can’t spend so much time with each other unless you both want to go insane. You tell your lecturer how well your assignments are going & he gets the bright idea to let you tutor someone in your class who is struggling a lot & is in desperate need of help… that being Hyunjins friend, Han Jisung.

18+, MDNI, SMUT WARNINGS UNDER THE CUT.

main masterlist here

part 1 here & part 2 here

ALL WARNINGS: Jealous Hyunjin, Jealous reader, Possessive Hyunjin, voyeurism??, recording, spit, creampie, fingering, oral(m rec), body worship, PIV, unprotected sex, marking, begging, dirty talk, praise, angst & fluff, crying after sex, brief aftercare (more happens off screen), soft hyunjin

-> reader is described as Hyunjins girlfriend & 'she/her' pronouns are used a few times but its brief<3

->This isn’t proofread so if there’s any errors i apologise mwah x

In the month running up to finals, you have been absolutely drowned in assessments & of course you need to pass, so for that reason, you n Hyunjin haven't spent as much time together. You do both study together every once in a while but you work a lot better on your own & he respects that, leaving you to it as he studies in his own free time.

You have both been doing well in the sense your feelings have grown for one another but college is still the same, Hyunjin still being the bubbly person, sitting with his large group of friends while you sit further at the back, but to give him credit he does openly choose to work with you for random partner tasks (which half of the girls in the same course a you now resent you for) & he brings you a drink at least once a day.

You've just submitted one of your last essays (which you're proud of of course) & now you can relax a whole lot more than you were before... until your lecturer asks you if you would like an extra few credits.

You of course say yes, knowing it will definitely help if for some reason you get marks taken off for your other grades, not thinking it would be too hard to complete, that is until he tell you what you need to do.

"Jisung has been really struggling y/n, you can really help him & I know you can since you've never had below a ninety. Don't feel pressured please, but I'm sure he would really appreciate it." He says to you, giving you a pleading look.

You sigh before just nodding your head, not wanting to let your professor down, but also don't want someone in your class to fail simply because you couldn't be bothered to help him.

You know he's really good friends with Hyunjin, him mentioning a few times & they have always sat beside one another, loving to piss off everyone around them. You know he doesn't take anything too seriously but you would feel more guilty if you didn't at least try.

"Thank you y/n. I'll be sure to tell him when I next speak to him one on one. I'll see you tomorrow & I'll have him come talk to you, if he gives you a hard time though by being an idiot, don't be afraid to stop helping him, you're not being forced." He says to you in a cheery voice as he fixes his papers, messy all over his desk. You say your goodnights to each other & you leave the building, making the short journey home.

⭑･ﾟﾟ･:༅｡.｡༅:ﾟ::✼✿　　✿✼:ﾟ:༅｡.｡༅:*･ﾟﾟ･⭑

You get home & of course Hyunjin is already waiting for you, Tuesdays being the one day a week you promises you would spend time together, regardless of the busy schedules.

"Took you long enough, thought you had fell asleep in the damn hall. What was it he was talking to you about? I'd rather swallow a whole potato in one go than waste my time talking to that guy outside of hours, that guy hates me." Hyunjin questions, not looking up at you for more than a second as he stirs the pasta he is cooking for the both of you.

" He hates you because you made that mans hair go grey with the stress you've causes him n trust me, I almost did, we were talking about how I'm preparing for finals, he also asked me to help one of your friends with a whole lot of it." you sigh as you kick your shoes off & putting your bag on the coat peg hung up on the wall, on the tiny bit of free space that Hyunjins multiple jackets & hoodies now clogging up.

"Really? wait taste this, n who is it? Half my friends are dumbasses so you've got your work cut out, good luck to ya." Hyunjin jokes as he holds up the wooden spoon to your lips, his other hand underneath the spoon to catch any droplets.

You taste it n let out a hum of approval which makes him smile before turning around to continue stirring a few more times before going into your cupboard to grab two plates. "Your friend Jisung! I'm surprised he asked me out of all people, I've only had one actual conversation with him n that was during freshers, I only remember because he was wearing those glasses of his & kept bursting out into song randomly." you chuckle as you recall the memory, getting you both a glass before going into your fridge to grab the bottle of prosecco you bought yesterday just for this occasion.

Hyunjin stops his movement for a second before replying with a 'mhmm' & you don't think too much of it, grating some cheese before putting it on the coffee table in your living room rambling about random stuff, but his mind doesn't move. "So about Jisung, did you say yeah to helping him?" he asks, setting both of your plates down on the small table before grabbing two cushions off your couch n placing them on the floor, patting it for you to sit down next to him.

"Yeah, I agreed because I've only got a few more things to do n I'll be finished, I'd feel guilty for saying no, I can't let him just fail the entire course because I couldn't be bothered you know? If what you're worried about is that I won't have time for you, you're wrong, I'll still be seeing you on Tuesdays regardless." You reply in an your usual tone, giving Hyunjin a peck on the cheek as you thank him for the pasta before picking up your fork & taking a bite.

"Jisung.. Isn't someone you wanna try teach, It's a waste of your time, you should probably pass on the offer. You should help me! I'm sooo stuck on the power point." he responds, his voice monotone, trying to hide how pissed he actually is.

"Hyune, we both know you're not struggling, you only have like two more things to do so stop being silly, n besides, I get a few extra credits if I do it so it will be worth it." you say after swallowing a bite, looking at him & that's when you realise his body language, completely giving away the fact he is now in a sulk as he purses his lips at what you say, not verbally replying to you.

"Hyunjin, what's up with you, hmm? You were so happy when I got home, is something bothering you?" you ask him, putting your fork down. "It's just.. Jisung is just gonna try get in your pants y/n. I know what he's like, if he actually gave a fuck about this grade, he woulda tried way before now, he has a music career now so he doesn't even need college." he says, pointing his fork at you & swaying it around as he speaks, his voice serious despite him trying to sound unbothered.

You just look at Hyunjin, honestly confused on where this attitude has came from. "Just because he might have another career once he leaves, doesn't mean he doesn't wanna pass, Hyune. He won't 'get in my pants' I don't even know him or anything about him apart from what you've told me." a tinge of annoyance in your voice now, not at all liking what he has to say.

"Alright." he mumbles as he begins eating, not wanting to discuss it further so you ignore it, moving onto a different conversation, which makes his mood slightly better than it was before.

Hyunjin leaves an hour or so later, after helping you wash up & cuddling with you until you were dozing off. You give him a sheet of notes you had written earlier in that day just for him to help him with his own essays, changing the wording a whole bunch so he wouldn't accidentally write something similar to you have done, which he can't help but blush at the thoughtfulness. He leaves your apartment in the same mood when you first came home earlier on.

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You're walking to your morning class after grabbing a drink from the cafeteria when you hear someone calling your name from behind you over the music of your headphones, you turn around to see Jisung being the reason your name is being said, his dorky little smile looking back at you as he walks up to you.

"Hi y/n, in case you didn't know but I'm Jisung n I just wanna say thank you for helping me with all of this, means loads to me." he says, giving you an awkward chuckle as his hand rubs against the nape of his neck.

"Don't worry about it, just don't make it a waste of my time, I still need to do loads of my own stuff so I won't be waiting around for you." responding in a cold tone as you put your headphones on again before walking to your class.

You take your own unofficial seat & just go on your phone, not paying much attention to the things going on around you, blocking out the multiple conversations going on around you.

You look down to the right corner of the auditorium & notice Hyunjin isn't sitting in his own usual spot.

You; Where r u? u okay? Hyune<3: yea, just slept in lol, just take pics of what u write n i can use that, ill probs be in after break

You begin texting a response when the chair next to you is pulled out & someone sits beside you, you look to your left & Han is smiling at you, pulling his books out of his bag & placing them on the desk.

"Sir told me to come n sit beside you since he is helping yuna right now n he doesn't have time to re-explain it all to me. You still okay to help me, right?" He blurts out, looking at you with his boba eyes, you just nod your head & he smiles.

Jisung begins to show you where he's at on each part of the assessments he needs to do & shows you the very few notes he has actually been bothered to write down.

"You've only wrote this..? for an entire years worth of work this is all you have to help you?" yo snort as you hand back his notepad, your eyebrows raised. "I thought it wouldn't be this intense!" he responds, his voice whiney.

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You spend the next hour roughly explaining how to do the main parts of everything & you were writing down a few things for him since you realise he is a painfully slow writer, but you choose to hold your tongue since you think he is actually listening since he is actually asking you a question ever so often.

The time hits quarter past eleven so you grab your little blue money purse before standing up to leave for your break when Jisung moves his chair out so you can't leave. "Y/n, could I get your number or something? so I can text you.. about the work! of course." Han asks you as he stands up to face you fully.

"Awk yeah that would make sense, alright." you take one of your pens off the desk & open the cap before grabbing Jisungs hand before you write your number on it & then squeezing yourself past him, walking up the rest of the stairs to leave but he runs up to you again to begin walking with..well, behind you, ignoring his friends at the other end of the room shouting his name.

"Thanking you y/nnie, I can call you y/nnie right? anyways what's your plans for after college hours? Do you have a job you gotta get to? Any sorta clubs? I get the vibe you definitely are a part of... an art class. I woulda said book club but I feel as if that's too basi-" "You talk so much, holy shit. My plan is to finish what I need to finish tonight or tomorrow so I'll have time to actually help you" you cut off, rolling your eyes as you begin walking one of the common area benches, Jisung still trailing behind you.

You sit down & Jisung settles himself beside you, smiling at his friends whenever they walk past, talking your ear off as you just stare at him, not paying attention.

A minute later, You turn away from Jisung & lean your head against the wall in annoyance , Jisung now talking about how he lived in Malesia & almost got eaten by an alligator when your eyes scan the area & that's when you notice Hyunjin strolling towards you. You lean back upright & smile n wave at him & he smiles back, until Han pops his head out from behind you to see who you're waving at, your body no longer covering him from the way you're both sitting.

Hyunjin reaches you but doesn't sit down, instead standing in front of both of you. "Heya y/n, hi jisung, what you both talking about." Hyunjin says in a weird tone of voice, sounding slightly off standish. "Couldn't tell ya, sir didn't really go over anything new so I didn't write anything down to give you, he was just answering others questions, come sit." you say as you pat the spot beside you but he doesn't budge, feet staying glued to the floor, hi eyes moving to now look at the man sitting beside you.

"So if he was answering questions all day, why'd you not just ask him for help on what to do? Why are you putting more on y/ns plate?" Hyunjin spits to jisung, his facial expressions scarily neutral. "Because he would spend an entire day explaining it to me! I asked y/n a million times if it's fine n it's fine! y/n doesn't mind it." Han whines back, throwing his hands around & that's when Hyunjin notices your number drawn onto his hand.

Hyunjin looks at it then back at the both of you before scoffing. "Point is, you don't give a fuck about passing, I'm not stupid. I'll see you later." he speaks in the same cold tone, tapping your head condescendingly before walking away & down the hall out of sight.

"What the hell is his problem, he has such an attitude." you murur, mostly to yourself but Jisung responds anyway. "dunno, maybe stress." feigning innocence.

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Hyunjin walks into class, blood boiling. He sits on the opposite side than he usually does & puts his headphones on, basically throwing the items in his bag onto his desk before logging into his computer & pulling up his word document.

He doesn't look up at any of the noise around him, other students for some reason spending their break in the same room they've been sitting in for four hours now until someone taps his head before pulling his headphones off his head.

"Nice song, what's it called?" Lisa chimes as Hyunjin turns around, relaxing when he sees it's just her & not a random person trying to piss him off. "You're still on your essay? y/n handed hers in already, didn't your little girlfriend feel like helping you out?" she remarks, sitting on the edge of the desk, swinging her legs while she looks down at him.

"y/n.. isn't my 'girlfriend' so to speak n anyways, we both agreed to do it on our own since y/n concentrates better that way n i've learned that so do I, so if you could leave Lisa i'd like that." he responds, his tone sounding more rude than he intended.

"Who pissed in your cereal Hyunjin, jeez. That sucks, I'd love for you to help me, I'm further behind than I wanted to be, can I borrow your notes at least? & you sure y/n works better on her own? She was helping Jisungie a wholeeee bunch earlier." she speaks back, sweet toned, the smile not wiping off her face for even a second, picking up his notepad & flicking through it.

"Mhmm, just take it n give it back at the end of the day. I told y/n helping Jisung is a waste of time but sir n Jisung both wormed their way into her brain knowing she would feel too guilty for saying no, she didn't listen to me, she's too kind." he replies, not bothering to look up at Lisa despite feeling her eyes almost burning two holes into his side profile.

"Clearly not too kind if she can't listening to her own boyfriendddd" she teases, ruffling up his hair. "I told you, we aren't officially together, you taking my notes or no? I have stuff to do Lisa." he snarks as he finally actually looks up at her as she jumps off the desk, jotter in hand.

"I know, just wanted to hear you confirm the fact. I would ask you to send me the notes but you've blocked my number, y/n has you so bitched, didn't think I'd see the day." Hyunjin just rolls his eyes as Lisa says this but he sees you & Jisung walking back into the room, six or seven levels above & he gets an idea.

He rolls his chai out, blocking Lisas path as he looks up at her, a puzzled look on her face. "If you say please, I'll think about unblocking youuu." he taunts, his pretty smile showing on his face. Lisa looks up at you in your usual seat, noticing your quick glances down back at them, trying to not make it too obvious before looking back down at Hyunjin. "Pretty please, Jinnie?" she responds, battering her eyelashes as she ruffles his hair again.

He chuckles before moving out of the way, letting her past. As she leaves, he murmurs a 'next joke, fuck that' to himself, internally cringing at the conversation between them before pressing play on his spotify again & doing his work.

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The day finally ends & you are quick to get out of the room, not being surprised if steam was coming out of your ears with how pissed you are. You noticed Lisa & Hyunjin speaking & you were unable to concentrate from that moment on. 'Why was she touching him?' 'Why was he flirting with her?' 'what a fucking dick' keep bursting into your mind & you honestly want to punch them both in the face.

Hyunjin gets his notepad back from Lisa & walks away without saying much of anything to her, trying to catch up to someone in particular... Jisung.

He knows his schedule like the back of his hand & it doesn't take much walking or time to find him, sitting on a small ledge waiting for the main music room to be unlocked for him, Chris & Changbin, eating a packet of skittles, filling his chubby cheeks while just idly looking around.

"Heya Hyunjin, you alright?" He questions, pulling his legs closer to his chest so Hyunjin can sit down opposite him, which he does. "Been better, got a question for you though." he sighs, leaning forward to dig his hand into Jisungs packet & takes out a handful of skittles, dumping the green ones back into the packet.

"Go f'r it." he speaks, words muffled as he pours more into his mouth. "What you doing with y/n? I pretty much made it clear to stay away, so what is your problem? You coulda asked anyone to help you but I know you went to sir n specifically asked for y/n's help, you can't fool me I've known you too long." he questions, his voice sounding far too normal for it to be comfortable.

"You didn't tell me shit, n I'm not a toddler, what makes you think you can tell me what to do? You're not actually together together so why can't I simply speak to her?" he remarks, smirking at him knowing he is getting under his skin as he throws his empty food wrapper at the bin but missing, making him kiss his teeth.

Hyunjin scoffs at his words, in disbelief. "Han stop being a dick, y/n is mine n it's that simple so just fuck off, I've never told you to leave anyone fuck alone until now so just do it? It's not difficult believe it or not." Hyunjin snaps back, getting more annoyed as the clock ticks by, not bothering to keep his tone quiet as another student walks by every once in a while.

"Yea n we also agreed we wouldn't cockblock each other yet here you are, you guys aren't official which you said yourself so it's fair game. You can't claim someone if you're still flirting with your other little side pieces, me & y/n saw you n Lisa earlier. You seriously wanna get rid of everyone else you see for one person? Next joke." he replies, his voice raising at the end, honestly enjoying how pissed off Hyunjin is getting, his face getting more & more red.

"Lisa is literally nothing to me n yea-" Hyunjin is cut off as Changbin n Chan swivel around the corner, all smiles. "Heya Hyunjin, not seen you in ages, Jisung I got the key so we can go in now, you coming Hyun?" Chan questions as he turns his back to unlock the door.

"Nah, I'm busy n got things to do, I'll speak to you all later." Hyunjin replies, squishing Changbins cheeks playfully, trying to ease any tension the others are starting to sense, before walking off, his breathing intense as he leaves the building & pretty much speed walking home.

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He enters his complex building & storms up the multiple flights of stairs, skipping a step or two each time. He turns the corner & sees you sitting on his doormat, both of you making eye contact.

You stand up & wipe any dirt that could be on you as Hyunjin sighs, stopping in front of you as he moves one of his headphone speakers, not even bothering to fully pull them off.

"Are you gonna speak to me n tell me what's wrong with you Hyunjin?" You speak out, placing your hands on your hips. "Do you seriously not know what you've done? Give me a fucking break. Move, I want to get inside." he spits back before trying to worm his way around you but you stop him.

"Hyunjin what the fuck is your problem? I've done jack shit n yet you're treating me as if I'm an annoyance to you! I'm not leaving till I get an answer." you yell back, getting even more pissed at his attitude.

"I'm not even going to bother arguing with you, especially in my fucking hallway y/n, get inside." He spits out as he pushes your arm away & unlocks his door before entering, not bothering to shut it as he knows you're gonna end up following him.. which you do.

You shut his door behind you & chase behind him as he walks into his bedroom & throwing off his hoodie, not even acknowledging you as he does his usual routine.

"So you gonna explain or what? Also turn around when I speak to you, don't be so fucking rude Hyunjin." you utter, speaking to his back as he doesn't even bother looking at you.

"Got nothing to explain. You gonna tell me why you wrote your number on Jisungs arm when I specifically told you what he would be actually wanting from you & after telling you it would be a complete waste of time?" He scoffs, rolling his eyes as he turns around to look back at you, leaning on his desk.

You raise your eyebrows at him, not being able to hold back the shocked laugh at his words. "Are you being fucking serious? First of all Hyunjin, I'm not a kid that you can boss around n second of all, I only gave him my number so he can ask me about anything he needs & I'm basically finished everything I need to do for finals so I don't fucking care about helping your friend out a bit!" you yell back, your heart beginning to race.

"It's fucking obvious he was flirting with you y/n?! Are you really that naive to fucking see it? Sorry to be the one to tell you but it's true." he replies, swinging his arms around & pointing as he speaks.

"So fucking what if he was? It changes absolutely nothing since I'm not interested! But if you want to speak about flirting, you're a huge fucking hypocrite since you were basically drooling over Lisa earlier & you knew I was watching! Your attitude is disgusting & if you're acting like this when we aren't even official then what makes you think that is what I want? You're straight up immature." you shout, your voice going a bit raspy & your hands shaking.

"I did that because I was fucking hurt about what you were doing! & I know we aren't officially together but you haven't been acting as if you want to be with me! You don't even listen to me y/n when I know what the hell I'm talking about. I chosen you for me to actually try get into a relationship with but I'm thinking it's not worth it." he cries out, tears threatening to leave his eyes as he says this, shouting back at you.

"Are you trying to insinuate I'm 'lucky' to be in this position with you, get off your fucking high horse holy shit! I didn't flirt with Han at all but you can't say the same about you & Lisa, how am I supposed to trust you if you act like this over something so small? This isn't even fucking worth it Hyunjin, I'm not going to let you see me as if I'm beneath you." you respond, your voice going monotone at the end as you shake your head at him before turning around to leave, realising this conversation is getting nowhere.

Hyunjin is quick to step across his room & get between you & the bedroom door, blocking you from leaving. "When the hell did I say you're beneath me? Why can't you see how upset I am over all of this? I want to be with you in the future but you are just throwing it back in my fucking face? Do you just like the attention or something? Is that why you just straight up refused to listen to me?" he questions, looking right into your eyes with his own, his eyes being similar to how they looked when he came to your house & confessed to you not too long ago, but with anger mixed in along with them this time.

"You're fucking joking, right? What 'attention' am I getting other than you yelling in my face about it? Stop being such a jealous prick Hyunjin, the future isn't now so you don't have this 'claim' on me like you think you do, as much as I want it & how much you claim yo want to, we aren't fucking dating & you wanna know why I think you're trying to hold back? Is because you like the attention & you won't be able to fuck anyone else without it being considered cheating! Come back to me when you can sort your jealousy & other issues out." You scream at him, a tear or two falling down your cheeks but you're quick to wipe them away, not looking right at him as you speak.

Hyunjin cackles at our words before yet again stopping you from being able to leave, putting his hand on the door handle. "You speak so much stuff that you're convinced you know all about but you couldn't be so wrong it's honestly a joke. I don't want anyone else but you & I've made it so clear since the start, You expect me to not be jealous when someone is fawning over you.. what's mine? Acting as if your blood doesn't boil when anyone flirts with me? You being so pissed about Lisa is a prime example. Stop acting like you're any better than me, that you're not just as possessive over me, you just don't wanna seem like a psycho about it." He replies, his tone still full of venom but no longer yelling at you, tonguing his cheek.

"Why wouldn't I be jealous? I'm clearly threatened by all the girls who drool over you, even more so because I'm not similar to those girls, I'm not as confident or straight up ballsy as them! But the way you've gone about everything is so wrong Hyunjin." You cry, voice lowering to match his but the tears not fully stopping & he takes his finger to wipe them away, pouting.

"I'd be lying if I said you admitting you're jealous isn't hot, but stop fucking worrying, I wouldn't give you the time of day if I wasn't one hundred percent sure. Stop crying too, you don't need to. But being for real, y/n, sto-" He is cut off as your phone begins ringing in the back pocket of your jeans & Hyunjins arm is quick to swing around & pull it out before reading the nameless number, Hyunjin hands it to you with his eyebrows raised, already knowing who it is.

You answer the phone & It's obviously Jisung, who doesn't even give you time to say anything before asking you a whole bunch of questions, saying he is 'stuck' on what to do.

As Jisung speaks, Hyunjin taps the 'speaker' button before ushering you towards his bed, his smirk not leaving his face. You look up at him with confused eyes as the back of your knees hit the bed, making you sit on it before Hyunjin pushes on your shoulder so you're laying fully down, your feet still on the floor of his room before getting on top of you & moving your head to the side before nuzzling his face in your neck, beginning to nibble at it, making you tense up beneath him & your breath hitches.

"Jisung can I call you ba-" You're cut off by Hyunjin nibbling down on your neck as he mumbles a 'nuh uh' & your hand reaches up to pull on Hyunjins hair & he does his best to hold back a groan, his hand slithering down to your jeans, unbuttoning the button after around thirty seconds of trying & then using his hand & legs to push them down just far enough for acccess.

He begins to allow his finger to graze over the outside of your pussy, feeling the fabric of your panties, not failing to feel over the small wet patch now visible as he sucks a dark purple hickey into the crook of your neck & your eyes scrunch together as you bite your lip, trying to not make a sound.

"I did the first two paragraphs but I'm stuck on what quotes to use, I think the ones I've chosen are too short to keep writing about, what quotes did you choose?" Han questions on the other end of the phone but you're barely paying attention as the man above you now wriggles his fingers under your panties, now drawing small circles on your clit, making you gasp.

"You can't use t-the same quotes I use J-jisung, read what you've chose o-out to me." you stutter out, hips grinding against Hyunjins fingers as best as you can with the position you're in.

Jisung begins to read out his quotes & Hyunjin can't help but let out a small chuckle, half at how hard Han is trying but the other half being at how hard you're trying to remain coherent, so he steps up his actions. He cups your pussy before dragging his hand down to your dripping hole & entering two fingers in, a small squelch being heard & your legs tense up even more as you melt into his lips, still suckling hickey after hickey into your neck.

"Y/n? Am I breaking up? We can meet up if you want & you can go over it, I know a café we can meet at if you're free?" He requests & Hyunjin breaks away from you neck to reply for you. "y/n is busy, figure it out." he remarks as he hangs up before turning your phone off & tossing it to the side.

"Didn't know you're into that, y/nnie, you're so wet just from a few touches? So dirty." he remarks, smirking at you before locking his lips with yours, his tongue tasting your own before he even gives you time to respond & you bring your hands to cup his cheeks.

His fingers begin to hit against your G-spot as he uses a 'come here' motion as his thumb begins to rub your clit from side to side, making you whine into his mouth, making him smirk.

You move your arm down, dragging your nails down the front of him & over his abs over his shirt before beginning to palm his cock over his joggers, making his hips jerk forward before changing your position by rolling himself onto the bed & pulling you so you're straddling him, his fingers leaving your cunt as he does so, making you whince.

You begin grinding over his covered hard on after kicking your jeans fully off, you being left in just your shirt & panties. "Maybe you're the dirty one Hyune, can't resist touching me while your friend is on the phone hmm?" You finally have the chance to reply & Hyunjin chuckles as his hands come down to your ass, fondling the skin. "Oh but I can resist, but why would I when it's funny to hear him try ask you out while disguising it as 'studying' while you're at my house currently half naked?" he replies instantly, biting his lip as your wetness is now soaking through your panties & leaving a small spot on his clothes, staining them.

You roll your eyes before you pull his shirt off his body, messing up his hair a bit before you slither yourself off the bed & onto his carpeted floor & tugging on his joggers, his hips raising to help you remove them, leaving him in only his underwear.

"You're being bold for someone who couldn't take more than a quarter of my cock last time you sucked it, you trying to train yourself for Jisung?" he teases, resting his bodyweight on his elbows, looking down at you as you pull his hardened cock out, pumping it slowly in your hand.

"Maybe I just didn't want to take any more seeing since I have no idea where it's been." you spit back, looking up at him as you smirk, your bottom lip in between your teeth as you let a glob of spit escape your lips & fall onto his pretty pink tip. He opens his mouth to respond but you cut his words out of his chest by licking a long strip from just above his base to his tip before letting the tip fall past your lips, suckling on it softly, making him hiss.

You let your tongue swirl against his tip before you begin dipping your head lower, allowing your mouth to take part of his shaft in your mouth too. You are still a bit nervous since it's only your second time sucking cock but Hyunjins words fuel you to prove to him you can take it all, so as he is taking a deep breath out, hand holding your hair out of your face, you force your head down further so over half of his cock is now in your mouth & you hollow your cheeks, making his toes curl & have to consciously try not jerk his hips into your mouth.

"You been practicing y/n? Doing so well, taking it so g-good, so pretty." he groans, lightly slapping your cheeks, feeling his cock through the skin of your cheek, giving him butterflies.

You begin to bob your head up & down his cock as you use your hand to jerk him off in the same rhythm, making his grip in your hair tighter as his groans & hisses get more frequent, making you convinced you're probably leaking your own wetness onto the floor you're situated on.

You let yourself off his cock to catch a breath as you let all the spit that's formed in your mouth get dribbled back onto his cock if it hasn't already fell past your lips & you look up at him with glossy eyes as you pump him at a faster pace, his cheeks blown out & now breathing out his mouth.

"Only practice I've gotten is off the pretty boy I'm looking at right now." you chuckle, honestly having no idea where the confidence is coming from before you blow cold air onto his tip, making him yelp & scrunch his eyes shut before leaning forward to pull you back onto the bed.

"I refuse to cum before fucking you" he mumbles, out of breath as he kisses you again, full of tongue. "Open your mouth." he hushes as he breaks away from your lips, fingers playing with your folds over your panties again, his wet cock against your thigh.

You do as he says & he spits into your mouth, humming as you swallow it, nothing but lust in both of your eyes. "Such a slut deep down, aren't you? You want more? Your hips can't fucking stay still." he chuckles, biting his lip as he looks down at the sight below, your lower half squirming to try get more friction & you just whine.

"Hyune.. Please give me it, don't I deserve it?" You question, seduction tinging your voice & Hyunjin can't stop the feeling of his cheeks & ears going hot, the way you're currently talking making his head spin.

He stands up & pulls you towards the edge of the bed, still laying on your back as he peels off your soiled underwear, your pussy glistening & his mouth waters, deciding to spit right onto your clit, making you whine.

He pushes your legs that little bit further apart before situating himself between them, jerking himself slowly while looking down at you. "How bad do you want it, hmm? tell me how much you want it, pretty." he speaks, not looking away from your pretty face as he hits his tip against your clit, making a tiny, sticky slapping noise. "Hyune I deserve it, want it so much, don't I? Look how wet I am for you." you whine, fingers trailing down to spread your lips, exposing your hole to him.

Hyunjin groans at the action , his cock twitching as he aligns himself up with your entrance. "Say it one more time, didn't quite hear you." he replies, hand caressing the inside of your thigh as he drags his cock up & down your folds. "Hyunjin please just put it in! I need it s-" Your cries are cut off as he pushes his tip past your hole & sheaves into you until his pretty, full & heavy balls are against your skin, making you gasp.

"You're so tight, Jisung not fucking you right?" He asks, trying to sound calm & collected when in reality he is trying to not cum on the spot, your warm, wet walls wrapping around his dick perfectly. "t-stop winding me up hyune, please move." you whine in response, making Hyunjin smirk as he retracts his hips before thrusting back into you, knocking the air out of your lungs.

He sets a slow but powerful pace, small squelching noises & both of your whines & grunts filling not only his bedroom but the entire apartment. "For someone wh-who's such a fu-fuckboy, you're not fucking me l-like one." You struggle but get the words out, wanting to give him a taste of his own medicine & it works as he grunts before pushing the backs of your thighs up against your chest before beginning to pound into you, making you squeal.

"You wanna try repeat that for me, hmm? You're saying that as if anyone can fuck you like this but me, your cunt is mine, can't your brain understand that or are you just too much of a whore to only want one dick?" He snaps at you, his hair sticking to his forehead because of the sweat as he abuses your cunt, his thumb reaching down to your cunt, making you yelp & your hips begin meeting his thrusts halfway.

You shake your head but he isn't happy with that response & he grabs your face by the cheeks, forcing you to look up at him as he leans forward. "Words, y/n, where did your boldness go, hmm? Who's pussy is this? Tell m-me." He asks, breath quick & short as he doesn't slow down for even a second, letting out a hiss as you reach up to his back & digging your nails into him on accident, for sure leaving marks later but none of you bothering to care.

"Y-y-yours! Hyun-jin I'ma c-cum." you screech, brain going completely blank, your body almost exploding with sensation. Hyunjin smirks at you before standing upright again, continuing his assault on your swollen cunt. "Cum for me then, show me how good I-I make you feel, Only I can do this for you, can't I? Only I know how to m-make you feel so good, you look so beautiful under me, you need to see." he groans back at you, throwing his head back momentarily before looking back down at you as you cum around his cock, wriggling & squirming as it washes over you, your knuckles going white from the grip you have on his bedsheets.

He fucks you through your orgasm, leaving you breathless before he pulls out. You don't have much time to question it however as he pulls out of you & grabbing your phone off the floor before returning to you.

"Gonna show you how fucking hot you look, It's on your phone so it's just for your eyes, no stress." He says, breathless as he turns on the video option before pressing record & sliding himself back into you, your orgasm forming a white ring around his base.

You clench around his thick cock, partly from overstimulation as he begins pumping into you again, chasing his own release now. The camera is pointed at you so you decide to act up a little, pulling your shirt above your tits, exposing your hardened buds to the camera & cold air of the room, making Hyunjin whine. "Look how beautiful you are y/n, you're anything & everything I could e-ever fucking want, taking me so well, I've t-trained you to take my c-cock so well." he says in a husky voice, his throat now dry as he continues ogling you, looking down at your swollen, reddened pussy, dragging the phone down to let the screen get a good look too, watching it tense & clench around him, making his knees almost buckle.

His eyes widen as your fingers move up to your pretty tits as you begin playing with your own nipples, tugging & pulling on them before raising your fingers to Hyunjins lips & he gladly suckles on them, moaning onto them before you pull them out of his mouth & caress your now spit covered nipples softly.

"You like the c-camera, beautiful? You-you're so dirty, so p-perfect for me. Turn your pretty face to the side, show the camera w-what you let me do to you y/nnie" He groans, his voice high pitched & squeaky & you do as he says instantly, not fully processing what he meant or said as he move the camera upwards, showing the purple marks he has inprinted on your skin.

"G-gonna cum y/n." he forces the words out & before you even realise, you're wrapping your legs around his waist & pulling him towards you. He tosses the phone to the side again before falling onto his elbows on each side of your head & you use the rest of your strength to tilt your head up enough to connect your lip to his neck & you begin pinching the skin of his neck with your teeth & you suck a big purplish red mark into his neck as his own orgasm washes over him.

He melts into your skin as his orgasm fills you, coating your walls & giving you goose bumps. You let him fully lay on you as you softly kiss his neck & earlobe, letting him catch his breath back as you also try relax your own breathing.

You lay like this for a minute or two in complete silence as you now begin playing with Hyunjins wet hair, before tears start leaving your eyes. You begin to sniffle & Hyunjins brain switches itself back on as he pushes his head up from your neck to look at you, now crying.

"Y/nnie, why are you crying? Did I hurt you?" He begins to panic as he moves off of you to start checking you but you sit up too, basically following him as you wrap your arms around him, pulling him back down to you.

"Just stay here f'r a bit, Hyune I'm sorry, I didn't know how upset I would make you." you sniffle, not looking right at him as he looks at your reddened face, his heart hurting. "I'm sorry too, I don't want you to feel insecure, I was being stupid. Can we.. go on a proper date? I know it's not the most romantic time or place to ask but I was n still am serious about only wanting you y/n, I mean it, pinkie swear." He asks you in a soft voice & he holds out his pinkie to you & you can't help but let out a small giggle as you interlock them together then kissing your thumbs before locking in the promise.

"Took you long enough to fucking ask me." You reply as you wipe the tears off your cheeks, reaching up to kiss Hyunjin on the cheek & his already red cheeks get an even darker shade.

"Better late than never, Stay here n I'm gonna get us a drink n we can go for a bath." He kisses your forehead before getting off of you but he takes the time to shuffle you up to his pillows & laying your head on it as he grabs his bed throw & lays you under it so you're not just sitting there, before leaving the room dancing & singing.

"Y/n & Hyunjin sitting in a tree" He sings out loud as he walks around his house & you can't help but laugh. "Stop singing that or I'll change my mind!" You yell & he shuts up instantly (not including the whine of protest he yells back), making you laugh to yourself.

I'm not completely sure I want to do a fourth part to this so in case this is actually the finale, I really hope everyone who has taken the time to read it has enjoyed reading the past 3 parts as much as I enjoyed writing them & thank you for all the kind words! <3

TAGS: @tsunderelino @troublemaker02 @ismokeeweed @lmhcats @isagerada

[blingblong55]

Choke-Simon 'Ghost' Riley x Reader x John Price NSFW

^Such a fucking good song

Based on a request:

OK, weird combo Price!jealous x Ghost!possessive x F!reader. Reader goes on a mission with Her mentor Ghost and her Captain. I just imagine them pulling reader one way to another to end up sandwiched between them for some angry dominant sex. Idk just a thought --- F!Reader, smut, MDNI, 18+, dub-con, angry!sex, dom!Ghost, dom!Price, sub!reader, P-in-V, unprotected!sex, degrading, threesome, anal!sex, jealous!Price, possessive!Ghost, spanking ---

A/N: in Badjhur we trust

It was supposed to be a short missions, simple and quick. No one knew it'd end up being running to the woods' safe house, having to stay longer than expected and make both of your commanding officers jealous or possessive of their little private. Tension grew when you asked Ghost to open a bottle, the lid too hard to twist and your tired state not being able to create much strength. Price wished you asked him instead, a real man, in his words. That whole day, you spent it between laps, getting taught how to clean your riffle properly, teaching you new techniques and then the occasional groping.

At some point, you went from occasional pulls towards one of their laps to having one man pull your waist to his side whilst the other pulled your arms towards him. "Fuckin' leave her to me Price," Ghost said through gritted teeth. "I'm not letting you have her sit on your lap, lieutenant." Price puffed out a cloud of smoke. You looked between them and as Price lifted your chin to look at him, Ghost cupped your face and made you turn to him. "My pretty girl," he lifted his balaclava and as he was about to kiss your forehead, Price pulled you to his side.

"Don't touch her," his arms wrapped around you. Ghost couldn't take it you were his and at base, he had made sure all soldiers knew that. Price kissed you, hands roaming on you and then you felt it, Ghost bitting onto your neck, marking you as his. "Whoever makes 'er come more, fucking wins 'er." Ghost took your jackey off, lifitng the shirt from your body and tossing it aside. "What a beauty," Ghost kisses your shoulders and neck. Price with one single move removes your bra and kisses the collar bone.

Clothes all off, your captain's head between your thighs, teasing your folds all while the lieutenant makes you open your mouth wide as you give him head. You let out a whimper when they abruptly stop and put you on all fours. "Let's see who gives her a better time," Price's hands caress your bare ass before he gives you a good slap. You mewl and he chuckles, "Oh, what a good girl," he continues to slap your ass and without warming, Ghost smacks his cock on your mouth. "Stick your tongue out for me, be a good slut," he commands. You do as told and he smirks. "Spit on it, baby," your spit covering his tip, tongue swirling around and giving him pleasure.

Your mouth slowly stretches thin as his fat cock gets inside it. His thrusts all in rage, wanting to win this bet, make you his slut by the end of it. Price needed you to be his, needed your pretty holes filled and leaking with his cum, leaving you to his mercy only. Thick fingers deep inside your cunt, pumping themselves into that tight pussy of yours. The sweet noises of you gagging and being choked by Ghost's fat cock, making you clench on Price's thick and veiny cock. You cry out. Your g spot getting pleased at every thrust. Ghost knew this, so he pulled out, "Let me take her first, to show you how good her face looks when I take her fully," he tried to reason but in truth he needs you to himself, to be the one fucking himself into you.

"Fine, but I'll be next," His heavy cock gets stroked by his calloused hands as he sits and watches from the chair near the sofa. Ghost rubs his tip rubbing your slit, you let out a soft whimper to which he grbas your chin and makes you look at him. "Good fucking sluts take what I give," he spits out. Your mouth spread open, his fungers fucking your throat, tears and gags all running free, he smirks, his dick hard and slowly being thrusted in you. Your tits bouncing at his hard thrusts, he slaps yopur face when you close your moth around his fingers, "fucking keep it open!" he commands.

Price couldn't take it, so he moves to your mouth, his cock taking the lieutenants fingers place. "We had a fucking deal, Price," Ghost growls, thrust become more rough. You try and plea but both men could not care for you at this time. Price chokes you with his hands, your neck would for sure get some bruising after this. His balls slapping against your face. Your eyes shut as the tears and war paint came offf your face. Ghost hoplding your hips in place, his cock abusing your tight cunt. Price holding your neck, enjoying how you choke and clench around his cock, Ghost encouraging this by groaning. "Fucking. Slut. Taking. It.All." He said with each thrust.

The bulge of Ghost's fat and lenghthy cock on your tummy, he presses it down, which makes you moan. The vibrations only feeding Price to win this contest. Your tits getting slapped, Ghost bends forward and nibbles on them. Price pulls out, lays down and forcefully makes Ghost pull out. Your juices leaking from the lieutenants cock. Price on his back and your back to his chest, legs spread apart as he aligns his cock to your ass. The tight walls stretching for his size, you cry out only to get your mouth filled by Price's fist. Ghost holding your legs up as his cock gets buried in your cunt.

Your body was beyond pleasure, beyond the ecstasy of it, it was like entering a realm of sex and pleasure. Both of your holes getting stuffed and as wanted, filled by their cum. You'd think they stopped there, but they didn't, especially not Ghost. His thick and rough fingers pinch and rub your clit, you squirm and before you could even close your legs, he slaps the sensitive tissue. "Oh...what a delight," he smiles and leans forward, kissing your neck only to get pushed away by Price who kept choking you.

"Mine," Ghost grunts and bites your shoulder, leaving his teeth marked on your skin. "My fucking slut," he bites your neck this time and as his cum leaks into your cunt, he bites harder. You cry out a moan and he aggressively slaps your face. "Take it, bitch!" He slaps you again.

Price pulls out, your ass filled and covered in his cum. Ghost lifts you up, your weak legs wrapped around his hips, his cock still buried deep in you. He pushes you onto him, guides your pussy to his cock with every thrust. His hands under your ass as he moans. Price lighting up a cigar, watches with a smirk. Your nails dig into Ghost's back, you leaned against him, cries of pleasure escape your precious lips. Once he pulls out, he feels your juices and his cum drip form hour abused hole.

His big arms wrap you in a tight embrace as he gives you a sweet and long kiss. Soon, as you sat on his lap, all cuddled and kissed, he turned to Price. "Look who she is with now," he smiles and looks down at you. Pouty, flustered mess in his arms, holding him like he was your source of life. "My cum still leaks from her," Price comments. "Not for long, I'll make sure to replace it with mine," he kisses you again.

--- A/N: Let's thank @gh0stsenpai007 for helping me write parts of this scene &lt;3 ---

Tags: @amygaster004 @liyanahelena @archangel1206 @bubblegumbabycow @saoirse06 @montenegroisr @potatoknight @braindancecopy

[simplyalicee]

Sleepy Teacher

Miss Circle x GN!Reader

You held your papers to your chest, your heels clicking against the hard, tile floor of the hallway. The gentle sounds of your footsteps filled the silence that swept around you. Various flyers decorated the plain walls that were grey and gloomy. You'd occasionally come across a few drawings here and there from students. But aside from that, the design was simple.

You marked your way to the teacher's lounge, your stomach rumbling for some needed food.

You forgot to pack lunch.

You couldn't help it.

You taught your class as usual. Gave a two to three week unit, hand them a study guide, and test them the next day. It was a lot of papers to grade for a single teacher. You feared falling behind, so you spent hours at night trying to grade what you could. And so far, you've only managed to grade half of what was needed to be done. Not to mention that you also hadn't updated your lesson plans yet.

You took a seat at a table, the room empty. You placed the packets of papers on the desk and rubbed your temple. Your head throbbed with excruciating pain. You felt like crying. But you were a teacher. You signed up for this amount of stress, so you resorted to sucking it up with a sigh. After a minute of collecting your thoughts, you grabbed out your pen and began to grade the papers.

Time felt slow, and you grew more tired by the second. Sleep deprivation overwhelmed you and your thinking process. You spent 20 of the 35 minutes of lunch trying to grade a single packet. Your thought process was slowed down that you hadn't registered someone walking in the room.

"Mx. Y/N?" A soft, Japanese accent filled your ears, and you flinched, nearly dropping your pen. You turned your head around to see Miss Circle standing in the doorway.

"Goodness, you nearly scared me to death," you frowned.

"I called your name twice," her eyes narrowed at you.

"You did?"

"I did."

"But I didn't hear you. And since when did you come in?"

Miss Circle didn't say a word. Her eyes stared into your soul, and you knew right away that she caught on to your habits. This wasn't the first time she's found out about your lack of sleep. And unfortunately, she was not real happy about it. Her footsteps clicked against the floor as she made her way to you.

"How much sleep did you get this time?" She asked with a stern tone. You stared at her with visible confusion. You were zoned out until she had to tap your shoulder to get your attention. You simply tilted your head and stared. Miss Circle scoffed lightly.

"How do you expect to be a good role model when you can't even take proper care of yourself?"

"I do take care of yourself," you retorted.

"Then why are you staying up late?"

You stood silent, unsure of what to say or how to respond. You simply shook your head and went back to trying to grade papers. Miss Circle frowned in disapproval. She sat down next to you and lifted your chin up, turning your head to look at her.

"This isn't good for you, you know that by now. If you keep this up, I'll turn you in to the principle—"

"No, please don't!" You protested.

"But I will with the way you're neglecting your sleep. Papers shouldn't be over your top priority."

You stood silent, the feeling of dread washed over you. You hated how caring she was about you. You could handle a few hours of sleep, you thought. You crossed your arms and turned your head away from Miss Circle. Her fingers lightly tap against the table.

"And I'm assuming you didn't pack your lunch either?" She asked. Your eyes widened, and you stood silent. You felt her eyes glare down at you as your silence was obvious enough. Miss Circle mumbled a few words underneath her breath as she went through her lunch bag and pulled out a container with a sliced sandwich. She handed you the bag in front of you and reached over to take away the papers stacked in front of you. You glanced at her and groaned to yourself.

"You really don't need to," you mumbled.

"Oh, but I insist," she whispered back in a hushed but angry tone. "I'm not giving you a choice. Eat."

You shook your head. "No. Come on, seriously. I really need to grade those papers."

"Absolutely not. These papers can wait. Eat the sandwich, and I'll give them back to you."

You snarled in frustration. You were too tired, so you just slammed your head against the table with your arms folded. Miss Circle stared at you for one moment, her eyes narrowed down at you. After a moment of glaring, her gaze softens. She places the papers down beside her and presses her hand on top of yours.

"Listen, I'm not trying to be mean. I'm just worried about you, okay? This isn't healthy for you. You can get yourself sick, you know."

"I know," you sighed. "But it's almost summer break. I can't slack off. The students are stressed enough as it is."

"And so are you. They're not the only ones dealing with stress," she reassured.

"..I'm so tired," you whispered, your vision getting blurry.

"I know you are,"

Miss Circle was about to continue her sentence. But you lifted your head up from the desk, leaned in, and leaned your head against her shoulder. You were tired to notice, but Miss Circle froze with shock and felt her face flush. She stood still and allowed you to lean against her, unsure of what to do. Finally, she wraps her arm around you and holds you close to her.

"Uhm, Y/N?" She gently called out. Nothing. She tilted her head, only to see that your eyes were closed. You fell asleep on her. Miss Circle was flustered, but she held you close. Using her foot, she pulled your chair closer and made you lean on her. You looked so peaceful. Your breathing was steady. You felt at peace. Miss Circle couldn't help but feel her heart swell with adoration.

This was okay. Next hour was her planning period anyway. She didn't mind this, not one bit. Miss Circle kept you close, her fingers gently trailing against your skin that left goosebumps in their wake.

"I suppose a few minutes wouldn't hurt," she whispered, her lips curling into a smile the longer her gaze stayed at yours. She leaned in and pressed a soft kiss on your forehead.

How sweet. ♡

☆------☆

I wrote this at 11 pm. It's not the greatest, but I hope this is well for you. ♡

[hwathinker]

"aww, why are you crying baby? come on, i'm gonna take a break now can i?"

pairings ; best friend!yunho x fem!reader warnings ; i don't think there is.. (i'm joking.. there's cockwarming, blowjobs(?), petnames) just yunho being a tease and annoying.. i really love the cocky + nerdy concept on yunho ;) wn ; hey! i finally got a free time today, so i decided to spend it on writing something. i'll be taking requests by the way! i'm hoping to see some smutty reqs from ya'll hahaha

"come on y/n, its not that hard to memories these shit." yunho said, poking your head which was buried to the book you were supposed to read. you had spent over an hour in his apartment, just for a study session. you also promised yourself to study for real this time but i guess the tiredness and laziness in you held you back. you shook your head aggressively, making him stop touching you. "y/n, we have a really tight schedule and i know you know that. plus our presentation is in 3 days. spend your time studying so you won't have to struggle to go out with me." you shot your head up as soon as yunho mentioned about going out. your parents doesn't really let you go out unless you do something great in school. but with pleasing them by doing house chores, you know you could get out easily. well, not every time.

"ugh.. how many times do i have to read these?!" pointing at the open book, you looked at him. "if you really want me to memories this then how about you?" you held the book up close to your face, shooting your eyes up to him then at the book back to make sure he isn't peeking. yunho sighed, letting go of his pen and turning to you. he looked at the book title, making a face to remember something. "well, physics huh.. what page are you in?" he asked, shifting his body and putting his arm on the table so that he can rest his head on his fist with his cheeks. you quickly went to the first page, knowing that he doesn't pay that much attention on a first page of a book. "uh.. page one. i'm not telling you what it is though." you said, burying your head to the book once again and shifting you gaze between the book and yunho every 4 seconds. yunho smiled, pretending to remember what was on the first page. "physics is the natural science of matter, involving the study of matter, its fundamental constituents, its motion and behavior through space and time, and the related entities of energy and force." you read what was on the page along with what he said, your eyes slowly going wide as he do.

"the fuck?! how in the earth did you remember every damn word in this one ass page?!" you slammed the green book on the table, going up close to him with rage in you. "i don't know, maybe i started to pay attention to the first page now. or maybe not, because i'm smart." he said, going back to his position and continue his revision. "or maybe.. you could help cover for me?" you said, leaning your head on the table as you puppy eyed him as you smile. yunho gave you a silent answer, which was a no. "come on yun, i know you like obeying me." you teased again, smiling ever so widely. "how about you study or i fuck that mouth off." he shift his gaze to you, placing down the pen under his palm.

you pouted, covering your face with your hand. yunho let out a small chuckle, grabbing you by your waist to get you more close. "i've never seen you this shy, y/n. you always fight back my teasings." he said, laying head head on the table too, close to your covered face. "i'd rather have a cock inside me for long enough than having to suck one that has a possibility of piss on it." you mumbled, hoping he won't hear a single thing when he's just right there, in front of you. yunho took your hand away from your face, meeting his eyes that was already staring at you. "do you want to try?" he bit his bottom lip, smiling lightly. you think, furrowing your eyebrows and pouting your lips. "i don't know. so you're hard?" you looked at his reddening face as your hand quickly went to his.. harden clothed dick. oh he is. yunho slaps your hand away quickly, holding them in his big ones. "suck it." he ordered, watching your smile grew wider. "why so needy? were you already planning this all along?" you said, shifting closer to him so there's no more space between the both of you. "sure. i'll do it. but you'll have to do a favor for me, too." you said again,getting up from the table and wait for him to strip. he stood up, sliding his sweats down and place them beside the table. but this time, he went to the sofa, sitting on it then leaning comfortably back while manspreading.

you looked at him with lust, his tongue going over his bottom lips, wetting them then biting them afterwards. he watches you walk towards him, your knee purposely hitting his crotch as you lean in to give his jaw a nice lingering kisses, to his lips. "how long have you been keeping this from me, hm?" you mumbled in the kiss, enjoying his taste. "ever since you appeared like a damn angel in front of me and decided to become my friend." he held your jaw with his hand, caressing them. you ran your hand from his bicep, down to his chest. gently touching every part as possible to make him shudder. you pulled away from the kiss, going down as he watches your every move. your tits, holding onto its dear life in the top you had. it looked like it want to pop out in any second you make a risky move. and your tight low rise jeans. ah, don't mention it anymore. he loves it when you wear that kind of clothes.

after you had took off his boxer, his dick sprung out, precum leaking to his base. "fuck, who are you going big for? me?" you said, grabbing his cock gently, kissing the pink aching tip. he hissed in pleasure, throwing his head back. "who else do i have to keep this dick for? of course it was for you, angel." oh god, that nickname has you every time. you licks his cock slowly, going down and fitting the whole base in your mouth. as you suck him off. him, on the other hand are sweating, tears started to form in that boy's eyes. he had his hands placed prettily under your chin so he has a better view while the other caress your hair ever so sweetly. he is this sweet when receiving a blowjob? oh you could do this everyday if it means he is. "mmh, such a good girl. other boys must not be this thick, right? i know you enjoy this so much, baby." he said in between moans, grunts. you swirl your tongue, making a popping sound when letting his cock go. he felt empty, and cold.

yunho pouted, watching his dick being held and watched by you. "y/n.. why did you do that? more please.." he begged, grabbing your free hand and holding them in his. "i want a favor back." you gently pump his cock, watching him biting his bottom lip. "what is it hm..?" he hummed, thinking about what you possibly want. you leaned and lay your cheeks on his cock, looking up to him. "i want you to cover for me for the presentation soon."

and that, you were being sat on his lap while he does his revision. your top thrown away even god don't know where, your jeans and red panties thrown at the sofa. now, you're being forced to sit on his dick that has cummed a few times because you moved a little. you were facing behind, hugging him so tightly, hoping to not make a certain move or he takes a break to play with your hardened tits again. i said, again. you shuddered at the feeling of his liquid constantly coming out and its touching your walls. "y/n baby, don't move please? i've said this a thousandth times already." as he put his pen down, he pulled you so that you're leaning on the edge of the table and facing him. "aww, why are you crying baby? come on, i'm can take a break now can i?"

--

hehe a small yunho smut for ya'll <3 i miss this man so much and have you seen his airport look? god damn i would devour every single inch of it. and have ya'll seen seonghwa's gianna boyfriend?? goshh if he's not putting a shirt on i'm gonna suck those tits LMAO lmk if theres any error guys.. and remember to drop some hot ass smut thoughts on my inbox please im beggin u

[thedivinetexts]

uhh. sorta brat tamer!price punishing reader for flirting with ghost? overstim, daddy kink, afab terminology. he calls you his good girl a few times

- 🐰 -

you act like you don't understand why he's doing this to you.

price has you on your elbows and knees — well, knees. your arms gave out after the last orgasm, leaving you to claw at the sheets for any shred of stability. you're still recovering from it, breaths coming out as gasping little things in between the whimpers and whines. the pads of his thick fingers continue to circle your clit, unrelenting even after wringing three orgasms from you so far.

your hips try to jolt away from his touch, his rough callouses just on the wrong side of too much, but price's other hand is firm on your hip. you won't be able to escape him unless he lets you.

"j-john," you keen, voice warbling pathetically, "please, it's - it's too much -!"

your complaint melts into a little squeal as he stops circling your clit, only to pinch it between his thick digits. he coos darkly at your shaking.

"shhshh, darlin', you can take it." he says. his voice is sickly sweet, a condescending comfort. "this is your punishment, sweet'eart. you can be a good girl for me and take it, right?"

you shake your head in an almost frantic manner, absolutely sure that you can't. he murmurs some more sweet nothings at the almost sobbed protests that spill from you. he wouldn't be surprised if you are crying, honestly. 'specially when he starts up again; light and quick, this time.

"no? love, you deserve this, remember?" price reminds you, voice a low rumble. he keeps a careful eye on the trembling of your thighs, ready to support you himself if he's gotta. ready to pull away, if you're really spent enough to call it. "you spent all evening hangin' off Simon, did'ya think I was gonna let that slide? you're mine, love. I'm jus' remindin' you."

"sorry — I'm s-sorry — please, please," you immediately start to gasp. he thinks it's adorable how quickly you start begging for his mercy once you remember what you're being punished for.

"theeeere you go," he groans. your mewling apologies and pleading is like music to his ears. "Sing fo' me, lovie."

hangin' off ghost, honestly. like the man wouldn't notice a pretty young thing like you watching him the whole night at the bar. like he wouldn't be chomping at the bit to get a piece of you, if you got too close.

price expects you to behave around his lads; you know they're ravenous dogs, waiting for his scraps. it's price who decides when to share what's on his plate though, not you. what morsel has a say in who gets to eat them?

"have ya learned your lesson, sweet'eart?" price asks in the same condescending tone as before. you're too far to care about the slightly mean note to his words, other than the fact it makes you clench around nothing. price chuckles when he sees it. "yeah, baby? ready to be a good girl for daddy?"

you nod jerkily, and price clicks his tongue at you. you know better — he needs words outta you, not just empty-headed gestures. in the meantime, his fingers continue to stroke your sensitive clit, making your hips jump in his hand. it is a punishment, after all.

"i'll be good," you sob the promise. even though it stings, you can't help but rock back onto his fingers, desperate for more. for something more filling. "john - ah, daddy, please, i need your cock, please!"

his fingers are off you in a flash. you almost collapse, relief and disappointment at the lack of stimulation mixing into neediness. you don't have to wait more than a moment before price is flipping you around. muscles flexing, clearly not breaking a sweat as he manhandles you onto your back. he parts your legs, not that you make an effort to shut them. you're too worn out to fight, even if you wanted. you don't, though. he can see the want in your eyes.

"there's my good girl," price groans, reaching between your legs again to prod your puffy lips apart. you whine half-heartedly at him, and he pays it no mind. too busy reaching into his trousers to free his aching cock. it looks an angry red after being neglected for your punishment. he groans, low and deep, as he slides the tip through your folds with almost no resistance. "didn't even have'ta tell you to beg for it. you're so wet f'r me, aren't ya, love?"

"please," you whimper. you feel almost like a broken record, but price clearly enjoys it, the way his eyes somehow go a shade darker.

"alrigh', sweet girl, i got you. i know what'cha need."

price could tease you longer, but he's got a soft spot for you. how can he say no to those tears streaking down your cheeks, especially when you don't even seem to notice them. you took his punishment — it'll be another week or two before you start flirting with one of his boys again. for now he'll give you what you want.

he pushes into you in one fluid movement thanks to the slickness of your cunt. it knocks the wind out of your lungs, head craned backwards and eyes fluttering. the both of you moan in unison; his a low timber and yours a high gasp. you rock against him as soon as he's hilted in you — desperate for another release, this time around his cock. as it ought to be.

for a moment price watches you fuck yourself using his cock with half-lidded eyes, reveling in your enthusiasm. depravity, maybe. whichever it is, he enjoys the view.

then he snaps his hips forwards. you choke on a moan, hands flitting between clawing at the sheets and clawing at his arms. price sets a quick pace; he knows you've got to be exhausted by now. as much as he'd love to spend another hour or eight fucking into your wet, warm heat, he can tell you won't last. already you're clenching down around him, chanting ah ah ahs that has him growling back.

"jus' like tha'," he groans, dropping his head to bury against your neck. your arms wrap around his chest, nails pulling at hair just the way he likes. he might not last either at this rate. he can feel the vibrations of your voice as he plants kisses along your neck — you sound gorgeous. broken.

he shifts his hips, fucking up where he knows your sensitive spot is, and listens to you wail. price nips at your jugular and pounds at the spot. your hands scrabble against his back and he lifts his eyes just in time to see yours roll back. he didn't think you could get any tighter but you do — always making daddy proud, the way you surprise him. he groans again as you come around him, his own thrusts stuttering from their previous machine-like pace. it only takes a few more whimpers from you before he's spilling deep inside. he fucks the both of you through it slowly, before he finally relaxes on top of you.

the two of you lay panting for a few minutes, basking in your afterglow. he gathers you close and presses a kiss to your forehead. chuckles when you pull away, whining petulantly at the beard scratching at you.

"tha's my good lass," he murmurs. "go to sleep, love. i'll clean ya up."

[w2sology]

morning scrunches, harry lewis.

summary: mornings with harry and baby bog

warnings: girldad!harry, cuteness overload!!!

waking up besides harry had quickly become one of your favourite things ever since the two of you began dating. his face being the first that you saw everyday was just so refreshing and bought you so much comfort.

today was no different, your hand naturally coming up to caress the side of your boyfriend's face as he slept peacefully. before you'd gone to bed, your head was on harry's chest but now, it seems the roles had reversed and harry's head was now on your chest, his arms wrapped securely around your body.

turning to the bedside table on your side, you checked the baby monitor, seeing your baby girl was still asleep.

using that as an excuse for a couple more minutes of cuddles, you inched closer to harry, feeling him readjust his head on your chest.

a few moments after, you heard harry groan, waking himself up after a good night's sleep. and like he did every morning, he searched for you, smiling through tired eyes once he found your beautiful face.

"morning, love," he rasped, kissing your cheek.

"morning, babe."

now that harry was up, you checked the baby monitor again, seeing your little sleeping beauty was wide awake, just feeling rather quiet this morning.

"d'you want me to go get her?" harry asked.

"no, it's alright, i'll get her."

the two of you often took it in turns to do the morning shifts, as you called them. one of you would tend to your baby and settle her down or get her ready for the day, whilst the other got to breakfast and making sure the rest of you were ready for the day.

walking to the nursery, you outwardly awed at the sight of your little bundle of joy, picking her out of her cot. the newborn scrunch was something you absolutely adored and would definitely miss as she got older.

"hello, my precious girl!" you cooed as she smiled a gummy smile, reaching for your face as you held her near you. "let's go say morning to daddy, hm?"

the first time you say harry interact with your daughter, you almost gave him another. he was such a natural with babies, people were surprised to find out he head a mild feat of them.

walking back to your bedroom, you saw harry had moved positions, his body now sat up against the headboard as the sheets rested around his waist, exposing his naked upper body.

he put his phone down as soon as he saw you and your daughter walk into the room, smiling so hard his cheeks were starting to hurt.

"look who's awake," he gushed as you handed her over to him, sitting right besides him. resting your chin on harry's shoulder, you watched how he interacted with your daughter, your heart swelling at the sight.

he kissed both her cheeks, watching as she squirmed and smiled at her dad's touch, her small hand holding his finger, grasping so tight as if it was all she knew.

"i'm gonna get started on breakfast," you spoke softly to harry, leaving as he nodded and kissed your forehead.

it was actually his turn to make breakfast, but seeing how occupied he was with your little girl, you were sure you could manage another day of making breakfast.

meanwhile, harry spent that time talking to baby girl about everything and nothing, things he did with her uncles lately, how big olive was getting and the playdates that they'd be able to have soon, things he'd seen that reminded him of her mother, how beautiful her mother was... literally rambling to an 8 week old about whatever came to his mind.

"did you know i actually wanted to call you bog? yeah, your mum put a straight end to that dream. you'll still be mini bog to me though," you heard as you came back into the room, laughing to yourself at the almost name of your baby girl.

"breakfast's ready," you mumbled against harry's skin as you kissed his cheek, giving your daughter one too. "oh look, you changed her! she's so adorable, i might cry."

"oh, please don't, you'll set her off again." harry rolled his eyes as you nudged him.

the next few moments were filled with a comfortable silence as your baby glanced between her parents, a serene look on her face.

"can you believe we made her?" you sighed.

"i can believe it, yes, because that's what happens when two people───"

"harry! gosh, i'm trying to be sentimental here." you groaned at his inability to be serious.

he laughed in response to your reaction, wrapping an arm around your shoulder as his other arm was being used to hold the tiny human. "i'm joking, i promise. but i get what you mean. like we're actually parents."

"still feels unreal."

"mhm. but," he said, facing you. "i wouldn't change it for the world."

humming at his words, you placed a sweet kiss on his lips, a hand on his cheek as you stared at him lovingly. "me neither."

[noira-l]

𝐒𝐩𝐥𝐢𝐭-𝐮𝐩

⋆ ★ '𝐘𝐞𝐚𝐫𝐬 𝐭𝐨 𝐜𝐨𝐦𝐞' - 𝐬𝐞𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐬

chapter summary: your first major argument that really shakes the foundations of everything, including your arrangement and its soul.

pairing: gojo satoru x f!sorcerer reader

warnings: is that angst?, hurt/comfort?, swearing, argument, adult life is kinda hard, mature themes, satoru is trying to say something, utahime is the best, spoilers (manga, anime, movie).

author's note: well, I had a rough day. Also, question. Should I open a tag list? Someone ask about this (I remeber you, love ~) So what do you think about the chapter and the idea? Let me know :3

"Listen to me, I've had enough. Screw it." You threw a kitchen cloth over the countertop.

"I'm here to help YOU. Not to do everything for you! You've dumped everything on me and you don't give a shit about anything," you shout, feeling like throwing it all away. He frowned. "You think I'm going to look after the kids by myself and you're going to have free evenings to go off on your own no matter where? Oh no no no. I'm not your fucking housekeeper for you to treat me like that." You pointed your finger at him, your tone rising even more. You felt like starting to laugh at the anger. "Fuck you. I'm not going to put up with this kind of treatment for a second longer." Your step left the sound of a loud thud. He started to follow you.

"You agreed to this yourself, you knew it would be difficult!" you felt like punching him. You picked up your backpack from the wardrobe. You were silent.

"I need time to myself, these missions are exhausting! Still! Taking over the clan, doesn't make it any easier for me at all, you know!" you didn't listen to him at this point, you were on the verge of exploding and you didn't want to do it.

"Don't act like a brat and listen to me!!!" he grabbed you firmly by the arm, you pushed him forcibly away from you, putting your shirts in your backpack. You packed the first necessary things that came your way. Your face was boiling with anger, you felt like shouting everything in his face, but you knew it wouldn't change anything. You clenched your teeth tightly and bit your tongue repeating to yourself - pack, don't think, leave. You passed him on your way out of the room. You were already at the door, started putting on your jacket, when he added:

"FINE! Go away, I never needed you anyway, you stupid idiot!"

The sound of the door slamming was everywhere.

★ --

calling…calling…calling…

"Hello?"

"Hi Utahime…" your voice gave away too much at that moment, as always "Could I stay with you for a while? I can't go back to the flat or to the facility" you grabbed your head, trying to contain your emotions. You were met with silence on the other side "Sorry to impose…. I won't… sorry… I'll go now- I…"

"N-no! It's all right! I'm just worried, what's wrong?" you could hear her worrying about you, you were on the verge of crying, all the anger was slowly draining out of you.

"U-Utahime…" your voice was shaking.

"Never mind, wait for me, please, I'll pick you up myself, I'll be there soon. Wait for me where you usually do, can you do it?"

"Mhm." tears began to run down your cheeks.

A long sigh "What did that idiot do to you this time?"

★ --

You spent the evening glued to a box of ice cream and a comfortable couch in Utahime's flat. You sat in her borrowed clothes, covered in a blanket, gesturing heavily as you expressed your emotions.

It started with an angry session in which you spouted off about what a horrible asshole Gojo is. You recounted in detail, how he forgot to pick up the kids from school, leaving them out in the cold often. How he was constantly late, whether to go shopping with you or to a parents' meeting at school. How he avoided household chores, which you later had to do after missions, and at worst his duties were filled by Tsumiki and Megumi. It wasn't that they didn't have household duties or didn't know how to take care of the house - no. You didn't know any more mature or understanding children, it was just that Gojo lived there too and should contribute as much as you did. For the last months, everything was done by you: laundry, shopping, cleaning, doing homework with Tsumiki and helping Megumi with calligraphy.

On top of that, you had missions that were also exhausting you mentally, coming home battered, in wounds because you didn't want to wake Shoko up at 3am and preferred to wait until morning. And every morning it was you, who walked the children to school. It doesn't matter if you were beating a powerful curse last night or if you slept at all. They always had breakfast ready, clothes and your smile every morning. You knew they deserved it - you wanted to give it to them.

As you came home from school on the days like this, did your shopping, went to Shoko's and came back, you thought of nothing else, but to lie down and rest. It was then that you allowed yourself moments of weakness, where you could carelessly cry all over the house, with no embarrassment that the children, or worse Satoru, would hear you. Your life has been awful for the last while. There have been better moments, but there have been far more of the worse ones.

It was then, that the crying session began.

You couldn't stop the tears that were streaming down your cheeks. You didn't say anything anymore. You just cried, hugging your pillow tighter.

Utahime only saw you cry once, that time when Geto left. And that was the only time. This one was the second.

She handed you a pack of tissues, which you took advantage of by resisting new tears. After which you immediately went back to hugging the lovely cushion.

Why did you agree to all this in the first place?

Why did you allow yourself to do something like this?

Looking after children is not an easy thing to do, especially when you are alone.

.

.

Suguru would never treat you like this.

If you thought before that you were more or less in control of your crying, so after that thought, you definitely lost all the control you had. It was no longer a cry. It was hysterical. And you are not going to snap out of it any time soon.

★ --

"What are you doing?" the white-haired sat on the steps, drinking a can of sweet drink. They had just finished their training.

"I'm going to talk to her." said the raven-haired getting up from his seat, heading towards the dormitories.

"HUH? What for? She's the one who blew up at you, after all. She should be making an effort now." He crushed the can with cursed energy. His friend sighed.

"You don't understand, do you? It is not that clear, besides I care about her. I understand her view of the situation and even though it's wrong, I'm willing to talk to her about it." Suguru put his hands in his pockets slowly moving away.

"Stupid, why bother." Satoru rolled his eyes looking at the training field.

"Because she is important to me, her opinion, thoughts and feelings are important." he turned towards him, he continued. "A joint solution to the problem is important. In moments like this, it's crucial to push away your tantrums and reach out to someone." Suguru looked ahead "There have been situations where I have made a mistake and she has come to me on her own" he smiled affectionately "I appreciate her for this approach and I love her for it."

-

Satoru opened his eyes, waking up from the slumber that had caught him. He rubbed his eyes, glancing at the clock; it was late at night. Instinctively, he glanced to the other side of the bed to find it empty and cold.

He clutched his head, remembering what had happened. He growled quietly. You haven't come back yet, it's past day two, he's starting to worry, the siblings keep asking about you too. And he doesn't know what to answer them. Should he say you're gone because of him? He's already punishing himself enough in his head.

He nervously turned on his bed. What should he do?

He knows perfectly well what he should do.

To go to you and apologise is difficult.

On the very first day he called all your friends, to find out where you were. Utahime only failed to answer, so he was sure you were there.

He growled rolling over onto his stomach in frustration. He hugged the pillow tightly, so that if it were alive he would have strangled it.

Why do you make everything so difficult?

It was supposed to be a simple arrangement: you help him with the kids, he provides everything you need. Like some stupid traditional marriage - he thought.

This was not how he had imagined it. In his mind, taking care of a kid was not that difficult. Oh boy, he was wrong. Originally he was only going to take Megumi in, you were the one who insisted that he couldn't separate siblings like that, and since you'd already agreed to the arrangement, you also had a say. He only agreed to it because you insisted.

He did not expect things to go this far. He never imagined that he would have to falsify the children's documents (Tsumiki was, according to the law, already unfit for adoption), look for a suitable flat that you could barely afford at first, or bother with the authorities and social services.

He himself was also too young to understand many things.

He knew that anything was better than letting the Zen'in clan get their hands on these kids.

He also knew that he would not have succeeded in many things without you.

His face clung completely to the pillow. It was your pillow, it smelled of you. He took it from your side as soon as he lay down.

Everything had been getting to him lately. Higher-ups had some doubts about him taking over the clan, which was ridiculous in general. His mother found out about his secret marriage, which meant he had to listen for hours on ‘how he had disgraced the whole clan’. He had to work twice as much, having a child and expenses were really considerable. Even if you shared expenses, Gojo did not yet have access to the clan's money, to throw his own money on left and right with ease. He also stopped feeling like a teenager at this point, by taking on these responsibilities, he has accept to a certain extent, the fate of an adult.

He didn't even notice, how much he started to run away from it, to distance himself, from his problems and worries. He was never in the habit of sharing his true feelings or emotions. Opening up to someone was blocked again when his best friend left. He knew, that he had let you look inside him once, at one memorable conversation. He was so weak in that moment, so shattered, after all that had happened. And you? You embraced him then, with a tenderness and care he could never have dreamed of. He knew that if only he opened up again now, you would do exactly the same. But he couldn't afford to do it again.

He didn't want to feel that he wasn't able to cope with something, again. It's silly, isn't it? He, the strongest, vulnerable?

But you saw him vulnerable. You didn't laugh at him, didn't mock him in that moment. You were tender, you showed him understanding, even if sometimes you didn't quite understand what he wanted to communicate to you, you tried. You hugged him close, stroked his hair, telling him that you would be there for him, whenever he needed you - you would be there for him, as long as he was there for you.

He wasn't there for you, was he?

He was so focused on himself that he forgot about you. You've had a tough time too, particularly with him. You were alone with it all. No. He left you alone with it all. That's not what your agreement was about, that's not how he promised to behave, that's not how he really was.

He acted like an asshole. He dumped all his responsibilities on you and yet had the audacity to complain, that you had not fulfilled one little thing, which was picking up his ceremonial outfit from the laundry, what he should do, but he was sent on mission.

A small tear appeared in the corner of his crystal eyes. It disappeared very quickly absorbed by the pillow. He shouldn't treat you like that. He sighed breathlessly, banging his head against the soft pillow.

Tomorrow he will go to apologize to you. Witnter snow was slowly falling outside the window.

He won't last another day without you.

★ --

"Utahime~~ Nice to see-" she closed the door in front of his nose, sighing with irritation, regretting that her apartment door did not have a peephole.

You just had breakfast, looking like a total crap. You just got up, even though it was late in the morning, according to your routine you should have taken the siblings to school long ago.

Hearing his voice immediately lifted your gaze from your plate. How did he find you? Why did he come here?

Ah, well, yes, he probably came to ask you to fulfill your part of the bargain and stop dabbling. You sighed. You couldn't stay at Utahime's for that long anyway, you didn't want to bother her, besides, you hadn't packed enough clothes and necessities.

You didn't want to see him at this point, but you had no choice. You spent the last two days crying, you were fed up with it yourself.

You moved away from the kitchen table, put your plate in the sink and headed for the door.

"Go away! Don't you understand that she doesn't want to see you!" Utahime shouted at the door, angrly.

"Ee~ Come on, open the door. I want to talk to her, she won't answer my calls and texts, what a man can do?" his tone did not at all betray how concerned he was about the situation. His mask was perfect enough, that he was even able to smile a little in this situation. Although he was quite cold, despite really warm winter jacket, in his kinda shakey hands he held a small bouquet of flowers behind him.

"Go to hell you moron, I also, don't want to see you too, go away or I'm calling authorities!"

"Don't be like that! Five minutes and I'll be gone! Do a friend a favour~"

"I'm not your friend!"

"Like hell you are! I saved you many times, that counts right? Like that time when I excorcise that curse that took you hostage for two days. Or that time when I-"

Utahime was about to hurl another insult in his direction when you placed your hand on her shoulder. “It's okey, give me a moment,” you whispered it so quietly that you wondered if you really said it. Her gaze expressed concern and yours expressed certainty. He had found you anyway, so why drag this out any longer? You knew he won't leave until you talk to him. “Call me as if you need something, or as if he doesn't give you a break." the violet-haired fell silent, moving away from the door and walking deeper into the apartment.

He didn't stop talking when you stood in front of the closed door. His yapping was unbearable, happily listing or coloring situations that happened to him with Utahime.

"Or when I-" he shut up when you open the door. He looked at you.

"You look like shit" he said.

"Thanks for noticing, something else to say?"

You had bags under your eyes, your voice was raspy and you looked paler than usual. When you looked in his direction, he could see how red your eyes were. He really messed up. He took a deep breath.

"If you came here to remind me of my duties, or to tell me that I'm going on a mission soon, or just to make fun of me, then go away and save us the time." you were so exhausted, however, seeing his face, which was smiling just a moment ago, gave you a new drive.

"I-"

"Ughh.. I am so done with this." you growled "You come here after two days and the first thing you find is that I look like shit? Thanks, I didn't notice!"

"Listen.." his voice is kinda...soft?

"NO! You listen!"

"O-okey..."

"Why are you acting like a brat? I've been doing practically everything for you for the past year! You disappeared for a few days, you didn't say anything, it's cool, I understand, you need space, yadda, yadda.." your voice has started to rise again "But damn it, that's not what we agreed on, I didn't sign up for doing all the work for this part of your life!" you clenched your hands into fists.

"Besides, I also have my own life, right? I'm not entitled to have a free time? Do you know how many times I came home after a mission completely tired? I wasn't at Shoko's more than once, I just went straight to make breakfast, because I knew YOU wouldn't do it!" he see how your expression is changing, now tears appear in your angry eyes.

"I-" he tried again, only to see that his voice stattered.

"Why do you do this to me?! Why can't you treat me like a normal human being?! What did I do to you?!" An avalanche of questions flowed from your mouth, again and again, just as tears covered your cheeks "Am I just a plaything to you?" you started to shake.

"N-no!" he tightened his grip on the bouquet.

"I fell so fucking used!" you started sobbing "You used me and my kindness to make life easier for yourself-" you sniffle "-you never cared about anyone or anything at all!" you looked at his winter boots, although your vision blurred completely.

"Stop! No-I-"

"I can understand, really, you may not feel anything towards these children, but me? I thought you really cared then! I thought you were sincere and open then, when…. we had… this conversation" you were slowly running out of words, the pace of this conversation was slowing down. You almost feel panic in your vains.

"Stop!" he grabbed you by the shoulder with one hand, and put the other to your lips, letting go of the bouquet of flowers, which fell to the floor. You didn't say anything anymore, you couldn't, he's hands were trembling.

"Please.. j-just..listen.." you wanted to turn away, he stopped you. The sight of you crying internally caused him pain, somehow.

"I-.. I am sorry..you're right." his voice was almost silent, despite the fact that he was close to you. Your eyes met his and despite the layer of glass, you knew he was looking at you.

"I-I am an idiot" his breathing was deep, as if saying these words made it difficult for him, or a great struggle, took his hand from your mouth, placed it on your cheek, his head went down "I've had.. I.. well.. the thing is.." he swallowed the massive lump that had gathered in his throat

"N-no.. ple-" you tried to say something.

"This.. this is hard..!! Just.." now his voice is trembling, you don't know what is happening.

"You.. don't know how hard are thing for me now.. I've.." long pause filled with nervous breath "Listen.. I know.. I've been awful to you.. y-you didn't deserve it of course.. I hurt you.. and I-I am sorry, so so sorry.."

"If this is some kind of trick to get me back-"

"No!" he imidietly put his sight to you, he look terriefied, you could see throught the glasses "I mean it.. " you looked away. He signed nervously.

"I left you with all of this.. I let you down.. I'm sorry.." he swiped away any tear that come close to falling down your red cheeks "I don't expect this to fix.. I m-mean my apology.. to fix anything.. but please" his hand was so cold, yet the sensation from this was so calming.

"Let me get this right.. I-I-I will never, ever let you down again.. one chance.. If you want to!" Do you want to? "If no.. I-I promise to back off! I leave you alone! I-I'll never hurt you again! and I'll do anything you say!" his words were speeding up "I will provide..I will make everything right.. I will try to.." his words were rapid, so fast, he almost couldn't keep up with saying every one of it. You started sobbing again. To much emotions cought you off guard.

"n-no don't cry.. please" he wispered, his second hand also landed on your cheek, you closed your eyes unable to even look at him.

He drew himself to you, embracing you whole. You could then feel how much his chest was rising in stress, and how wet his jacket was from the melted snow. His hair was also slightly wet, the glasses at his nose irritated your skin, they were so cold. But this embrace was warm, he held you like something important, precious even. Large hands stroked your back, his breath started to calm down, just like yours. You didn't know how long he held you like this.

"Please.." he started again "Try to forgive me. I.." at this moment you hugged him too, he pressed himself more to you.

"I don't want to lose you." You almost missed it, it was soft and silenty brethless, but it was full of emotions.

You waited, a long moment. A long moment when you thought about everything. You were thinking about him, your life, Tsumiki and Megumi. You didn't want to lose him too. In some way. He was the only thing that held you together. Also you don't know what you should do with your life, and he gave you a purpouse. A purpouse you were desperatly lacking. The kids gave you hope, and even thought you'll need to listen to his annoying voice every day, this is the price you could accept.

"Fine.." you said, gathering your voice to even be able to speak. You are far too soft for him. Oh, for fuck sake. "I.. forgive you.. for now." he froze.

You slowly left his embrace. Then grabbed him tightly by the collar of his jacket, pulling his face toward you "But if you do that again, I'm leaving. And don't even try to look for me. Understood?" you wanted to sound menacing, but your voice was so hoarse and the height difference between you was large enough, that it didn't work out well.

"Of course" smile appeared on his face again "You look cute y'know.." he mumbled, you let him go, growling, you looked down and see something behind his foot.

"What's that?" you asked, he quickly kicked something behind him, you heard something hit the ground on the bottom of the staircase.

"What?" he turned around to look behind and back, playfully "I don't see antything." his smile was so bright.

"Never mind." you signed.

"Let me take you home." this offer suprised you, Satoru could tell by the look "The kids miss you.. and I took your favourite take out." you looked at him suspiciously "I also cleaned the house and took kids to school."

"Now I don't belive you." you crossed your arms, he laught.

"You'll see when we get home." he corrected his glasses still smiling. "I did pretty amazing job, maybe even better than you."

"You're starting again?"

bonus:

You left Utahime's apartment thanking her for all she had done for you, saying that if she needed help, you were always available to her. She hugged you goodbye, measuring Satoru with a menacing gaze, and he waved her off, smiling goofily.

Walking down the staircase, Satoru took your backpack from you and gave you your gloves. The snow was still falling outside and it was quite cold.

When you were at the exit you noticed out of the corner of your eye a colorful bouquet of flowers, it was really pretty and quite small. You are sure you have seen these colors somewhere.

“Look.” you pointed your finger at the bouquet “Someone left it here, I wonder who it was for?” he scoffed.

“Quite ugly for me.” He didn't even look at it, just opened the door in front of him.

© noira-l 2024 | all rights reserved. do not copy, translate, modify, or redistirbute my work without permission

tl: @kalopsia-flaneur

[preseriesdean]

if you don’t mind me asking, could you share some of your favorite fanfics or authors? thanks ❤️

oh hi hello!! yes of course!! i actually haven't read any spn fic in a while but i have spent a lot of time organizing my bookmarks. i'm going to assume that you meant samdean fic but i'll add a few non-samdean ones at the end.

authors!

@zmediaoutlet (deadlybride on ao3)

candle_beck (ao3)

@goshen-applecrumbledore (ao3)

whereupon (livejournal)

Linden (ao3)

sevenfists (ao3)

there are so many more great authors but these came to mind :)

fics!

i am going to list my forever-favorites first - the ones i would recommend to anyone and everyone, screaming-from-the-rooftops kind of love - and then many many more under the cut.

beloved by urchinesque (2016, 1.9k, NR, warning: death) It might be the gentlest thing that's ever happened to them.

in my opinion everyone should read this once. it's quick. they die. it's-- happy, somehow. beautiful. i think about it all the time.

Last Day on Earth by candle_beck (2009, 10.8k, E) A list of things to do if you only have one day to live, presented in inconvenient non-list form.

last year my best friend and i were pondering which fic felt quintessential to samdean for us and somehow settled on this one. i still agree with the choice.

Odysseus, American by coyotesuspect (2010, 10k, M) Dean finds Peter O'Toole's recording of the Odyssey in a bin marked “Audio" in Casa Grande's only used bookstore. The place smells like cigarette smoke and old books, and it reminds him of Sam. Stanford era.

my favorite stanford era fic. i think it captures dean's loneliness and desperation beautifully.

A man with his insides out and his outsides off by britomart_is (2016, 5.3k, E, time travel, underage) They say there are only two stories in the world: man goes on a journey, and stranger comes to town.

another fic i want everyone to read. it's so short and feels like a novel. sam is messed up and dean is in love and everything is miserable.

Breathing Hard by whereupon (2009, 9k, E) The day Dean figures it out.

this is so simple and yet-- everything to me. i can't think about dinosaurs without thinking about this fic, which doesn't tell you much, but you'll see. sometimes this is really all you need.

The Last Outpost of All That Is by gekizetsu (2008, 59k, E) The world ends while they’re asleep.

this fic has stayed with me my whole life. i thought about it even during my years away from spn and fandom entirely. they're alone and you don't know why and they build their life together and you end up wondering, is this hell or heaven? whenever i come across a screenshot of the last couple of paragraphs i want to cry.

see things so much clearer by deadlybride (2020, 11.7k, E) Sam's been acting oddly. Dean learns how to use the history on an internet browser and finds out why.

this is a fic that hits the spot for me personally so well. another favorite preseries fic. i love the idea of sam using livejournal, and of dean finding out this way.

Stay The Distance by lazy_daze (2011, 24k, E) Sam is dependent on Dean's touch and closeness after the wall falls - Dean's presence reminds him of why he chose to wake up, and keeps the memories at bay, allowing Sam to function.

i love enmeshment, and i love that here it's literal. i love that they're just sort of fine with it.

more fics below!

in absolutely no particular order whatsover. please check the warnings and tags on these before reading!

Recall by De_Nugis (2012, 6.3k, E) Sam's having a hard time telling what's real and what isn't, especially when it comes to some voicemails from Dean.

Living in god's blind spot by applecrumbledore (2022, 25k, E) Of all the situations Dean didn’t need his dad to see him in, ‘getting off to being pushed around by a guy’ was in the top three. And ‘a guy’ was a massive glossing-over of reality. Any guy—any other guy—would be bad enough, but Sam was fucking cataclysmic.

Almost At Home by balefully (2008, 24.3k, E) Sam graduates from high school in early June in rural Tennessee. He and Dean start the summer with an all-nighter of celebration; the day after, while both fight hangovers, John calls to assign them their first hunt by themselves.

they said it was the fall of man by jukeboxhound (2016, 7.4k, M) Sam gets his soul back on a Monday.

When I Fall Asleep It Is Your Eyes That Close by britomart_is (2009, 1.9k, E) Post-Season Two. Sam is alive. Dean is happy.

Life As We Know It by sevenfists (2007, 13.7k, M, curtain fic) On the morning that Sam woke up, Dean ran five red lights on the way to the hospital, his half-empty coffee cup sloshing in the holder.

tied up like two ships by orphan_account (2014, 3.1k, E) Dean liked to hold hands.

Gospel Truth by Cerberuss (2020, 15.2k, E, case fic) ‘DOES YOUR BROTHER KNOW THAT YOU WANT HIM?’ Individually placed letters, bold and tinged brown with the weather. Sam can’t look away and he prays, dream dream dream.

Buy You A Mockingbird by candle_beck (2011, 10.3k, M, underage, outsider pov) A genuine horror story.

because you want to die for love by hathfrozen (2021, 27.3k, E) Sam and Dean settle into their Heaven—and into each other, too.

the constant vow by deadlybride (2022, 119k, E, fem dean-ish) They've just finished up a pretty standard job and are killing time in snowy Wisconsin when Dean wakes up no longer looking like Dean. That's just the start of their problems.

This Fortress Made of Us by mickeym (2009, 10.8k, E) Sam really didn't do very well without his brother. Coda for Mystery Spot.

State of Love and Trust/As I Busted Down the Pretext by cormallen (2010, 2.9k, M) When you know exactly what your brother's thinking, there are some chances you just don't take.

Quiet with the Rain by Linden (2014, 5.3k, T) Dean can spot an undercover cop at thirty paces, a hooker at twenty, and rims that will match his baby's at ten. But the fact that his little brother is in love with him—that, he can't see worth a damn.

have a cigar by deadlybride (2020, 5.6k, E) What happened with Andy and Ansem unsettles Sam. Dean doesn't seem worried.

Heart Shaped Balloon by winsive (2022, 18.5k, E, underage) Sam and Dad are fighting. No surprise, but it's the weekend before Valentine's Day and Dean isn't missing out on the chance to bang a cheerleader just to console his bratty little brother. He does bring back a heart shaped balloon for him, though. It's not supposed to be cursed.

Bare by gracerene (2022, 2.2k, T) Of all the things Dean hasn't done before, Sam never expected something as innocuous as skinny dipping to be on the list.

Speechless by candle_beck (2008, 11.2k, T, case fic) Dean loses his voice and their rapport is only moderately impaired.

Like It Was Yesterday by nomelon (2014, 4.9k, T, fem dean, amnesia) Sam can't remember a time when Dean wasn't there. Dean is always with him. Sam's whole life, there's never been anyone else.

Like a Ghost with Two Voices by Dyed_Red (2022, 46k, E) To cure Dean from the Mark of Cain, Sam has to let Dean, in all his demonic glory, possess him for 28 days. It goes about as well as expected.

Breathe You In (Choke You Down) by orphan_account (2021, 5.9k, E, pwp) Dean really likes the way Sam smells.

lost in yesterday by margaryes (2023, 1k, NR, john pov) John hasn’t seen his youngest son in 18 months.

Unraveling by Linden (2017, 855 words, E) No, he’d said, the first time Sammy had tried to kiss him, sixteen and half-drunk and stupidly beautiful, even though he’d wanted so badly to say yes.

pack up the moon by deathdreamt (2021, 5.9k, T, pre-slash) Sam storms back out from their room, his backpack on and his duffel hanging off his shoulder and isn’t it kind of tragic that his whole life fits in two bags. He looks suddenly much younger than he is, eyes shining. John is back at his guns, whiskey at his elbow, and Dean can hardly believe how rapidly his life is cracking down the centre.

Yesterday, minnesota by applecrumbledore (2022, 30k, E, case fic) Any initial awkwardness filtered away over a hundred miles of highway as Sam thumbed through the missing witch’s diary again. Some people had secret coke habits or secret second wives, and some people had passionate, pitch black, no-kissing sex with a family member every four to six months and never talked about it. You had to find ways to cope.

All Heartless Spectres, Happiness by orphan_account (2021, 5.6k, E) Lisa Braeden receives an email with the subject line, "You Deserve to Know." It contains a single video file and nothing else. (soulless sam)

The Palm Oasis by fictionallemons (2022, 12.3k, E, underage) John strands Dean and Sam at a middle-of-nowhere motel while he investigates possible demon omens in Arizona. The place is nothing to write home about, but at least it has a pool. Dean resolves to think of this as a vacation for him and his studious little brother, but when their money runs out sooner than expected, he considers turning tricks at a nearby truck stop so he can feed Sam.

Other Brothers by homo_pink (2020, 7k, M, underage, outsider pov) A callow boy can go from infancy to someone’s lover in the space of two wildflower summers.

Leader of the Pack by astolat (2007, 14.9k, E) Teaching old dogs new tricks.

Underground Wires by eggnogged (2012, 15.8k, E, fem sam, underage) It’s hard enough being a teenage girl even without all the extra crap: they move around all the time, her family is as far removed from normal as it’s possible to get, and she’s in love with her older brother. Sam has no control on any of it, she’s just trying to stay afloat.

Multitude of Sins by Linden (2015, 4.4k, T, outsider pov) Every now and again, Jim Murphy would look up from his altar and find the Winchester boys at the back of his church.

Like Arrows in the Hands of a Warrior by ADeedWithoutaName (2018, 10.3k, E, underage, dub con-ish, john pov) John Winchester loves his boys, and would take a bullet for either of them. He knows that he's doing it right, the way he's raising them, the things he's teaching them. Not every problem, however, has an easy answer. Like what to do after an incubus case in which their target got his pollen all over both of John's sons.

You Can't Lose What You Never Had by nigeltde (2016, 5.6k, E) You can't spend what you ain't got, and you can't lose what you ain't never had.

Flagstaff by Linden (2014, 7.3k, T, pre-slash, john pov) John tracked Sam down in Flagstaff, four days after he got home to find him gone.

I'll take my chance on a beautiful stranger by fleshflutter (2007, 3.8k, M, outsider pov) If Chase were a better friend, he might try to end the game now, before Brendan loses even more money. But if Brendan is a dick at Stanford, it’s nothing compared to how he is on break.

Cupid's Got A Gun by geckoholic (2012, 13.5k, E, non-con) Fuck-or-die, set in early S4. But they've been fucking for years, so that shouldn't be a problem, right? Wrong. Ever since hell, Dean's in no hurry to get that show on the road again.

Someone Else's Blood by sevenfists (2006, 6.7k, E) The first time, of course, was an accident. (pretend dating)

How Many Floors to Realize by lazy_daze (2009, 26k, E, swesson) AU from the end of It's A Terrible Life, in which Zachariah decides to keep stringing them along a little while longer, because damn if they aren't somewhat entertaining, right?

Worthless cartography by applecrumbledore (2022, 15.6k, E) Dean didn’t know what finally made him go for it. The djinn’s dream was a catalyst, but the call was coming from inside the house, and he’d been letting it ring for a very, very long time. (They get one night together right before Sam is taken to Cold Oak. Dean has to deal with that.)

The Space Between Sense and Memory by orphan_account (2021, 4.8k, T) There are a hundred unwritten rules on all the acceptable ways brothers should touch each other. There are hardly any ways at all to break them. Or; five times they follow the rules and one time they don’t.

Ions in the Ether by nigeltde (2019, 10.9k, E, case fic) When was the last time you trusted happy.

Crossed Wires by rivkat (2015, 10.9k, E) Dean thinks Sam is dead.

Crown and Anchor Me (or let me sail away) by Sena (2010, 23.7k, E, underage) Sam Winchester is fifteen years old, at yet another new high school in yet another state, he doesn't get along with his distant, distracted father, he's figuring out that he likes guys just as much as he likes girls, his clothes never fit and his limbs ache at the joint ever since his growth spurt started, he has to study for the PSAT and, oh yeah, he's a little bit in love with his brother, Dean, who's taken a break from hunting monsters to work at a local garage for minimum wage.

Wear Him Lika a Habit by sevenfists (2008, 2.2k, M) Their first kiss isn't an accident. It's anticipated well in advance, discussed for weeks, argued over, second-guessed.

Amor Prohibido by phoenixflight (2020, 3k, M, underage) They spent the spring of Sam's sophomore year living in a shitty apartment south of San Antonio. Every Friday night the clearest channel played three hour marathons of a Spanish soap called La Casa del Corazón. There was a mutually understood truce about watching it, because the alternatives were infomercials or creepy kids’ cartoons that futzed into static every fifteen seconds.

Open Road by Mollyamory (2010, 2k, T) Sam's old enough to know what's good for him.

It's the Blueprint of Your Life by queenklu (2011, 38.4k, time travel) Sam jerks awake in the middle of the night and everything goes to hell. Well, not literally, though Dean is staring down the barrel of less than a year before his deal comes due. In the midst of dealing (or not dealing) with his impending death, a killer ghost ship, and Bela showing up out of the blue, Dean also has to figure out what’s going on in Sam’s head to make him so twitchy, why he’s suddenly breezing through this case while writing endless notes in a notebook he won’t let Dean see.

North of Wednesday by Mollyamory (2008, 3.5k, G) Sam's behind the wheel before he realizes he doesn't have the keys. Coda to Mystery Spot.

non-wincest fic.

dean/omc. We Drank a Thousand Times by glorious_spoon (2010, 43k, M, warning: death) They meet in a bar fight in North Carolina when Dean is nineteen, broke, and desperate, then again when a hunt brings the Winchesters into town a few years later. Neither one of them ever puts a name to it but every once in a while, through the years, Dean finds his way back.

dean/cas: terror & desire intertwined by rupertgayes (2022, 39k, M) Faced with Castiel suffering a fate worse than death, Dean makes the decision to let Cas use his body as a temporary vessel. All things considered, Dean thinks, it could have gone worse.

gen, sam&dean: what lasts by deadlybride (2021, 17.2k, M) Not long after they move into the bunker, Dean loses a leg. Most of a leg. After the hospital, Sam brings him home, and they figure out how to live with what remains.

gen, dean-centric: To Repair Broken Men by procrastin8or951 (2015, 3.1k, T) Dad and Sam keep fighting. Dean can't fix his family, so he fixes things around the crappy apartment they are staying in.

dean/michael: our hour came round at last by orphan_account (2015, 1.8k, NR, pwp) "I want to be inside you," says Michael, low and velvet and hungry and that really shouldn't turn Dean on but it does.

dean/lucifer, dean/cas: exploratory by sp8ce (2022, 4.9k, E, non-con) One night, Castiel proposes he and Dean have sex. Except it's a little more complicated than that.

dean/cas: for a healthy heart by Askance (2013, 2.4k, T) A strange black box appears in Castiel's bedroom one afternoon.

gen, sam&dean: charmer & gentle by Askance (2015, 3.7k, G, outsider pov) The afternoon girl calls them Big and Tall, the strangers who come in late every now and then, buying this or that. The night girl doesn't think those names fit quite right.

dean/cas, past sam/dean: whose wings, though tattered, shall carry me home by fleshflutter (2009, 2.2k, T) There is a breeze moving across the field. It stirs the long grass in lapping waves like the sea. Castiel runs his fingertips through it and remembers flying.

[alltheirdamn]

Killing Me Softly | (Joel x teacher!f!reader)

Chap. 3: Violent Delights

Chp. 3 Summary: Every ounce of your resolve fades away as Joel finds his way past your walls. Rating: 18+ MDNI Word Count: 8.5k Warnings: pre-outbreak AU, language, mutual pining, slow burn, angst, banter, sexual tension, heavy kissing, cliff hanger (sorrrrryyyyy) A/N: This one may or may not kill you guys... sorry in advance & please don't hate me. I'll make it up to you <3

Masterlist | Ko-Fi

As Boston came into view from the window of the plane, your anxiety began to skyrocket. Exam week flew by, and now it was finally fall break. You had spent half a day scrambling around the house trying to pack while planning when to call a taxi so that you wouldn’t miss your flight. Putting the stress aside, you had made it in time and found yourself trying to ease your mind with a stupid romance book on the flight. You weren’t huge on reading romance, but it was mindless and passed the time as you soared over the states. 

Joel never reached out after he sent himself your number. You didn’t reach out either, which took a lot of self-restraint. You commended him for having just as much restraint because you were sure he’d cave and call you at some point. But the silence was blaring loud, and maybe he only wanted your number ‘just in case.’ You wouldn’t get your hopes up anymore.

You were coming down the escalator when your mom and two sisters came into view. Stella, your youngest sister, was the first to run and wrap you up in a big hug. Her black hair was chopped shorter than before, and she had a bright smile plastered on her face.

“Sis!” She squealed, squeezing your shoulders.

“Hi, Stell,” you laughed, hugging her tight.

“Look who’s home at last,” Beth said, her arms crossed over her chest as she watched Stella swing you back and forth.

Beth was younger than you by two years, while Stella was newly eighteen and still full of life. You and Beth hadn’t been very close since you left Boston, the bitterness of your absence still lingering between you both. 

“Hey, Beth,” you sighed, opening your arms to invite her into a hug.

She was hesitant at first but finally caved and hugged you back. It was brief, but you’d settle for it. Your mom was the next in line to hug you, her voice shaky as she welcomed you home.

“Don’t cry, Mom,” you laughed, pulling away.

“I’m just happy you’re finally home. We missed you a lot.”

She took your luggage and guided you through the airport down to the parking garage. Stella lingered close, wanting to hear about your life in Austin and how teaching was going. Beth, on the other hand, hung back and kept quiet. You knew things would implode at some point during the week, but until then, you’d just have to acknowledge the ticking time bomb in the background.

“Where’s dad?” You asked your mom, climbing into the front seat.

“He’s home grilling up some steaks for dinner. He hasn’t stopped talking about you coming home since you booked the flight. He’s missed you the most,” she sighed.

“I missed him too,” you muttered.

It wasn’t lost on you that leaving had caused a gaping hole in your relationship with your entire family. Even if they weren’t the biggest fans of Bennett, they continued to support you through your decisions to move with him and uproot your life. After he left, they begged you to come home, but you knew staying in Austin was what felt right. You had a job and a home; leaving was admitting defeat. You wouldn’t let him strip away the life you had made; you wouldn’t let yourself be a failure. 

The city blurred by as you neared your childhood home. You kept your eyes closed when you passed down the roads Bennett had once driven you, hoping you could force the memories away. But they still lingered. The past always seemed to linger. Stella and Beth chatted quietly in the backseat, leaving you in silence as the house appeared. Nothing had changed: the white brick chipping around the edges, the hedges in the front yard overgrown and unruly. You expected to feel at home, seeing the house again, but it didn’t feel like it once had. 

As you unpacked the trunk and hauled your luggage inside, you heard your dad’s voice floating from the back deck.

“Is that my girl?” He called out, walking through the sliding doors with his grilling tools in hand. 

“It is,” you smiled, dropping your things at the door.

“Hey there, peanut,” he greeted, awkwardly hugging you as his hands were full.

“Hey, Dad,” you whispered.

“Missed you, kid. How was the flight?” 

You trailed him out onto the deck, the smell of smoke mixing with the autumn breeze as it passed through the trees lining the backyard. You had missed seeing the seasons change, the yellowing of the leaves, and the crisp air that seemed to linger throughout the day. Nothing would beat the East Coast in the fall, even if you liked living in Texas now.

“The flight wasn’t bad,” you shrugged, sinking into a lawn chair as you watched him flip the steaks. “I don’t know why four hours in the air felt so long.”

“You know, you could avoid it if you moved back home,” he suggested.

“I like living in Austin,” you argued. “I have a good job, and I’m happy there.”

“I didn’t say you weren’t happy. All I’m saying is that you can always come home.”

You remember him saying the exact same thing after the wedding ceremony went to shit. Two days after the incident, your dad was consoling you on the couch, holding you as you cried and urging you to come home. You can always come home, peanut. 

“I know I can, Dad. Can we please just drop it?”

Your dad chuckled and made a pact with you not to repeat it. You only hoped your mom and sisters would do the same.

Dinner passed under a heavy silence. No one knew how to speak to you without possibly mentioning Bennett… or ‘the incident’ as they liked to refer to it. You awkwardly made small talk between your parents and Stella while Beth sat and pushed her food around. You stole glances at her ever so often, trying to form a plan when you could talk to her. Out of everyone in the family, your absence hurt her the most. She had been the most vocal about your issues with Bennett, which was to your detriment since you had confided in her the most. She gave the harsh truths and tough love, going so far as to try and talk you out of the engagement. In your love-struck haze, you hadn’t listened to her and found yourself defending Bennett—defending your emotions. You wished you had listened to her. 

“So,” your mom started. “Any new love interests?”

You gave her a pointed stare, stabbing the steak on your plate. This was the last thing you wanted: explaining yourself to them. 

“No, Mom. There’s no one to speak of,” you huffed.

“C’mon mom,” Beth laughed, chiming in. “You know she’s still wallowing away in that big house all alone.”

“Beth,” your dad warned. At the same time, Stella whispered, “Beth, don’t.”

“No, it’s okay.” You smiled through your teeth, glaring at Beth, who sat back in her seat with a smug expression.

“You did this to yourself, you know?” Beth said, cocking an eyebrow.

“Did what?” You questioned.

“We all warned you about Bennett. You knew he was no good, yet you stayed. And look! He left you.”

Her words cut deep, deeper than you wanted to admit. You kept your expression stony, not feeding into her words.

“Beth, you need to stop right now,” your mom nearly growled. “You’re out of line.”

“Let her talk, Mom,” you said. “She needs to get it out.”

“Oh, I need to get it out?” Beth snapped. “You’re the one fucking sulking about Austin, pulling this whole ‘woe is me’ bullshit. The signs were all there! Get over yourself. It’s been two years, sis. Move on.”

“Just because we don’t talk doesn’t mean I haven’t moved on,” you exhaled. “I’m still healing from it all, and I’m sorry I’m not including you in that. I didn’t know you needed access to every part of my life.”

Beth slapped her hands on the table, rising to her feet to stare down at you over the plates of food. You shrunk back, trying to keep the tears at bay. She was going in for the final blow. 

“You came to me for advice, and I gave it. You went ahead with the engagement and still ended up alone. He was never going to marry you. You’re a fucking mouse too afraid to defend yourself, and he knew you wouldn’t fight for him back. He’s probably glad he didn’t marry someone as stupid as you. You can’t see the warning signs even when they’re flashing in your face!”

That was it. That was the breaking point. 

You tossed your napkin onto your plate and removed yourself from the table. You drowned out your parents' voices and Stella’s yelling for you to come back as you ran towards the door. 

“Run!” Beth called from behind you. “Run like Bennett did!”

You barely made it out the front door before crumpling to the ground with tears streaming down your face. Staying with Bennett didn’t just hurt you; it hurt everyone. They wanted the best for you, and you didn’t see that until it was too late. Your relationship with Beth had been shattered because you had thrown all the blame on her. You blamed her for every traitorous thought you had about Bennett; you wanted to blame her for your doubts and unhappiness. But it wasn’t her. It was you. Everything was your fault—it always was.

Stella’s small voice saying your name roused you from your crying as she joined you on the porch. Wrapping her arms around your shoulders, she leaned into you and let you cry out every bottled-up emotion. 

“I’m sorry, Stell,” you sobbed. “I’m sorry I didn’t listen to you guys. I’m sorry I left. I’m sorry I never came home.”

“Shhh,” she hushed. “No one is mad at you for staying in Austin. We understand why you stayed. Beth is just hurt. You shut everyone out, but you shut her out the most. She just misses you.”

“All I do is fuck everything up,” you muttered. 

“No, stop that,” she argued, rubbing a hand over your back. “None of what happened is your fault. You deserved love, and he wasn’t the right one. You’ll find it again.”

“I stayed for too long. I should have left him long before the wedding. I was just hoping it would fix everything.”

“How were you to know?” She sighed. “Just because he was shitty doesn’t mean you can’t be sad. What he did was totally fucked up, and you didn’t deserve that.”

“Tell Beth that,” you laughed through a hiccup. “She thinks I deserved it.”

“She’s hurt. She doesn’t mean those things.”

“But she’s not wrong.”

Stella sighed, pulling away from you to level you with a sympathetic look. 

“I think you guys need to talk it out. Maybe not right now, but when you’re ready,” she offered.

“You’re the young one,” you groaned. “You shouldn’t be consoling your older sister like this.”

“Hey, someone’s gotta be nice to you,” she smiled, quietly laughing.

“Thank you,” you whimpered.

You fell back into her arms and stared aimlessly at the trees blowing in the wind. After a few quiet moments, you finally pulled yourself together and shuffled out of her arms. Stella watched you wearily as you stood, brushing the dirt from your pants.

“I think I’m gonna go for a walk to clear my head,” you announced. “Tell Mom and Dad I'll come back in a few.”

“Are you sure?” She asked.

“I’ll be okay, Stell. I promise. Thank you again,” you sighed, kissing her head.

Dusk fell over the neighborhood as you wandered between the trees and houses. A few neighbors walked their dogs while their kids ran through the streets playing ball or riding their bikes. You never wanted to be out and interacting at home, but you didn’t mind it here. There was no risk. No one would stop you and inquire about your life like they would at home.

As you rounded down the next street, your phone started ringing in your back pocket. You whipped it out and saw the one name you had been waiting for the last week: Joel. Part of you didn’t want to answer; you weren’t in the right headspace. But you had waited to hear from him, and honestly, he was probably the only person to sway your mood for the better. Sucking in a breath, you answered.

“Hello?” You said, hoping your voice didn’t betray you.

“I got a bone to pick with you,” Joel huffed, clearly joking.

But after the events of dinner, his words felt like another punch to the gut.

“Why?” You asked nervously, pulling the phone away to sniffle back more tears.

“I finished Romeo and Juliet, and I—. Wait, are you alright? Why does it sound like you’ve been cryin’?”

You let out a sad laugh; of course, he’d see right through you. He always managed to do that.

“Because I have been,” you sighed. There was no point in lying to him when you knew he’d continue bugging you. 

“What happened? Are you alright? Do y’need me to come get you from somewhere?” God, he sounded so sweet when he was worried.

“I’m fine, Mr. Miller. I’m not even in Austin right now, so you’re off the hook on that offer.”

“Where are you?” He pressed.

“Boston. I’m visiting family over the break,” you explained.

“You from there?” 

“I am.”

“I didn’t take you as an East Coast type of girl, but it makes sense with how stubborn y’are,” he chuckled.

“Yep. That’s me.”

“Alright, I ain’t gonna let you get off the hook this easily. What’s goin’ on?”

You rounded back down another street, holding your phone tighter against your ear, hoping you’d catch every breath in the receiver. Hearing Joel’s voice was enough to soothe your heart after a terrible night.

“Really,” you insisted. “We don’t need to talk about it.”

“I reckon we do. I bet you’ll feel better after.”

“I reckon I won’t,” you mimicked his accent.

Joel let out a low chuckle, clearly amused by your response. It garnered a smile from you as you pictured his lips turned up on the corners, the bottom lip pushed out and pouty like they always were.

“My family isn’t happy with me for staying in Austin. They think I should have moved home a couple of years ago,” you explained. “I’ll spare you the bad parts, but I should have come home. It would’ve made it easier on everyone.”

“But would it’ve made it easier on you?” He asked.

You stopped walking and pinched the bridge of your nose to hold back the coming tears. Of course, he saw it from the latter. He wasn’t siding with your parents, but he didn’t know what you had done and endured to deserve their bitterness.

“Probably, but it doesn’t matter. Listen, you don’t have to worry about me. We can talk poetry instead,” you offered.

“If that’s what y’want, and for the record, I’m gonna worry about you.” You could hear his smile through the phone.

“You don’t need to, Mr. Miller.”

“Joel,” he sighed. “Y’know, you can say my name.”

“I know, it’s just—.”

“All formalities,” he finished. “I just wish you’d quit that because I think we’re far past it by now.”

“I’m trying to maintain some semblance of professionalism,” you laughed. 

Your house was slowly coming into view again, and you felt the nerves creep back in. Eventually, you’d have to face them again, but right now, all you wanted to hear was Joel’s thick accent and husky voice. 

“What’s so wrong about bein’ unprofessional?” He joked.

“A lot, Mr. Miller,” you sighed. 

There was a brief pause on his end, and you bit your lip, wondering if he understood the meaning behind your words. You'd be completely vulnerable to him when you crossed the threshold between professional and unprofessional. Your restraint would melt away, and he’d win. 

“Should I be callin’ you Miss Smith again?” He sounded serious. “I don’t wanna make you uncomfortable and all that.”

“No,” you said all too quickly. “Call me by my name. I—I like it.”

You fucking idiot. 

Joel spoke your name in a lower voice, sending a shiver down your spine. Your steps back to the house slowed as you tried to control a strange urge rushing through your body. Was he teasing you? Was he actually doing that? You had to reel back in all the unprofessional thoughts swarming your head… especially the ones wondering how your name would sound when he was inside—. Stop that. 

“What’re you doing?” You exhaled. 

“Sayin’ your name,” he countered. “Y’said you liked it.”

“Yeah, I do.” You were beyond flustered and hot. “You’re—never mind. I should probably get inside and make peace with my family. Don’t think I forgot about Romeo and Juliet; I still want to hear your thoughts.”

“Call me tonight before you sleep,” Joel said. Oh, Christ. “I ain’t gonna remember the story if I wait any longer.”

“We could’ve talked about it earlier,” you chuckled. “You got sidetracked asking about me.”

“Is that a bad thing?”

You were at the edge of the front yard now, staring blankly at the porch light flickering against the nightfall blanketing the house. You couldn’t stay outside forever or on the phone with him forever—no matter how much you wanted to. 

“I need to get back to my family,” you sidestepped. “I’ll call tonight, okay?”

“Promise?”

You smiled to yourself, gripping the phone tighter in your hand. Damn this man, and damn his charm.

“I promise, Mr. Miller. Goodbye.”

“Bye,” he whispered, your name falling off his tongue one last time.

You were so screwed. Completely and utterly screwed. 

The house was quiet when you walked through the front door. Your mom and dad were lounging in the living room, flipping through channels, and Stella sat at the dining room table, working on her homework. Beth was nowhere to be found, which you figured would happen. Your mom glanced up from the couch with the same sympathetic expression Stella had given you earlier, and quite honestly, you were sick of it. You were sick of being pitied. You were sick of people being sad for you all the time. Yes, you were sad—all the time—but you wanted to be alone in your healing. You didn’t want to feel worse about it all from the people meant to support you. And you knew deep down they did support you, but it didn’t always feel that way. 

You needed to talk to Beth, or this entire week would be hell. 

“Is she up in her room?” You asked your mom.

She gave you a slow nod and then returned to watching the TV. She didn’t have to say anything; she knew why you asked.

Upstairs, your house was divided by two hallways. The left hallway had your parents and Stella’s room, and down the right was yours and Beth’s. You had spent so many nights with her tucked in the bed with you, staying up late talking about anything under the sun and always being each other's best friend. But that all disappeared when she realized how terrible Bennett was. Leaving Boston broke her heart, and in turn, Bennett broke yours and destroyed everything left between you and your family. 

After a sharp inhale and one final wipe of your eyes, you knocked on her door, hoping she’d let you in. The silence behind the door cemented the fact she knew it was you, yet the door opened and revealed Beth just as disheveled as you were. Her long brown hair was tossed up into a bun, and the makeup she had worn earlier was gone, a redness rimming her eyes in its place. You wanted to wrap your arms around her to apologize for everything, but Beth wasn’t that person. She didn’t want affection. She wanted words. 

“Can I come in?” You asked.

She nodded slowly, cracking the door open wider to let you step into her room. It was just as you remembered it: the fluffy white bed in the corner, the scattered polaroids on the wall, and the full-length mirror propped in the corner that you had gotten ready in front of before. Beth sat on the corner of her bed, her head hung as you joined her.

“I’m sorry,” she started. “I was a real bitch at dinner.”

You leaned into her, resting your head on her shoulder.

“You kinda were,” you chuckled. “But I understand. I shut you out. I shut everyone out, honestly. It’s easier to be alone.”

“No, it’s not,” she argued.

“Maybe, but it’s what I thought was best for me. You were right about Bennett, and I didn’t listen to you when I should have.”

“You may be older, but you are so stupid.”

You laughed harder at that, feeling her hand reach around and grip yours. You squeezed her fingers, your chest rising and falling normally. You missed this Beth, the one that could make light of the worst. 

“You know I couldn’t have come home, right? I made a life out in Austin, even without Bennett. I even went to his law firm and asked where he had gone, and all they said was that he took a job out of state. I was so scared he came back here, and if I came back to Boston, I’d see him again.”

“Why are you so afraid of him?” She asked.

“Because he broke my heart worse than I could have ever imagined. I don’t know what I’d do if I saw him again, Beth. I’d be terrified.”

Beth glanced down at you, shrugging you off her shoulder so you could meet her eyes. Tears swam in her blue eyes, rolling over onto her cheeks.

“You’re stronger than that. You always have been.”

“I don’t feel like it sometimes.”

She sighed, brushing away tears you hadn’t realized escaped your eyes. 

“Don’t let some shit guy ruin your life. You deserve to be happy, sis. There’s going to be someone so much greater out there.”

Flashes of Joel’s dark eyes and curly hair swam into your mind when she said those words. You didn’t want to believe Joel would be that person, but even your mind betrayed you. You willed it away, hoping you’d keep any thought of him lingering in the back of your head.

“I know,” you said. “Eventually, there will be.”

“There’s already someone, isn’t there?” She quirked an eyebrow.

You wanted to deny it and lie, but you wanted your friendship back. So, you told her everything, starting at the father-daughter dance and leading up to the phone call that had just ended. Beth had a massive grin while you spoke, nodding with every detail you shared.

“So… you’re gonna give him a chance, right?” She questioned.

“I can’t. He’s my students’ dad, and I can’t do that. It wouldn’t be right.”

“Then sneak around,” she pressed. “Here’s this amazing guy who’s obviously into you, and you’re gonna let that slip away because of what’s right and wrong?”

“What would you do?” You exhaled, falling back against her bed. You stared at the ceiling fan, watching it twirl in circles, hoping an answer would be hidden in its blades.

“I’d have amazing sex with him,” Beth chuckled, laying back beside you. “And then maybe fall in love, I don’t know. But sex for sure.”

“You’re terrible,” you giggled. 

Beth laughed along with you, shuffling her body closer so both of you were shoulder to shoulder. Coming home would feel like this again, but coming home would mean losing everything all over again. You’d lose your job and the house you loved so much… and you’d lose Joel. For some reason, the idea of not seeing him around made your heart ache in ways you hadn’t felt in a long time. Maybe Beth was right; maybe you’d give Joel a chance.

It was well into the night when you finally found yourself unwinding in bed and curling under the covers. You held your phone close to your chest, wondering if it was too late to call. In Boston, it was nearly midnight. Austin was only an hour behind, but you knew Joel worked early with his company. You didn’t want to assume he’d be asleep already, but the chances were slim he was awake and waiting for you. 

You dialed his number anyway.

It barely reached the second ring before he answered, your name as sweet as ever rolling through the receiver.

“I didn’t think you’d call,” he said. “Figured you forgot all about me.”

“Never,” you whispered, trying to keep your voice down. Everyone was asleep in the house, and the last thing you wanted was for them to hear you talking on the phone late at night like you were a teenager all over again.

“Y’figure everythin’ out with your family?” He asked.

“Yeah, it’s all good now.”

“Why’re you whisperin’?” He chuckled.

“Because everyone is asleep,” you tossed back.

“Sneakin’ around late then, huh?”

“Don’t tease me, Mr. Miller.”

“I’ll tease all I want,” he countered.

You blew out a breath, rolling over in the bed. With your knees curled up to your chest, you listened to Joel’s soft breathing and wondered if he was in bed, too. You wondered what he looked like, stretched out against the mattress, and if his body was as warm as his smile.

“Are you going to tell me about Romeo and Juliet? Or are you just going to sidetrack us again?” You asked softly.

Joel let out a heavy sigh, and you could hear rustling behind him. He was in bed, and for some reason, that enticed you. 

“You coulda warned me that they both die,” he started. “If it weren’t for Paris, they coulda had a happy ending!”

“The whole point of the story is to have a tragic ending. Shakespeare warned everyone in the foreshadowing, with Montague saying, ‘These violent delights have violent ends.’ It’s supposed to be a story about the chaos of passion.”

“Still ain’t makin’ up for the fact they never got to be together,” Joel grumbled.

“Not every story is a happy ending,” you exhaled, wincing at the words you spoke. You didn’t die because of Bennett, but the story hit too close to home. Between the chaos of family and the violent ends of your relationship, you had nearly become Juliet, killing herself over a man. Not literally, but the pain after the wedding was a death within itself. 

“Why d’you like it so much?” Joel asked.

“Wasn’t that your job to find out?”

“I’m not gonna lay here and make assumptions ‘bout you, but I get the feelin’ you’re a lot like Juliet.”

“Maybe,” you muttered quietly. 

“Who’s Romeo then?”

He didn’t sound angry, but you knew he only asked because he wanted to understand you better. And fuck, if that wasn’t a turn-on in itself.

“He’s the one that left me at the altar.”

There was a heavy silence from his end of the phone. You wanted to take the words back and shove them deep within you where the world couldn’t hear them. No matter how many times you said it aloud, it never felt easier. But it was the unfortunate truth; your love story had a tragic ending.

“Jesus fuck, I’m so sorry,” Joel exhaled.

“Don’t be. I’m okay.”

“Whoever did that didn’t deserve you. Perfect girl like you ain’t deserve someone that shitty.”

Perfect girl.

You had to clench your thighs together at the way his voice roughened when he said those two words. You wanted to play them on a loop over and over until you were mindless. Bennett never called you perfect—beautiful, maybe, but never perfect. He knew you for five years and never said it; Joel knew you for a month and not only said it…but believed it.

“I stayed with him a lot longer than I should have.”

“Wanna talk about it?” Joel offered, his voice gentler than a moment ago.

“Not right now,” you whispered. “I’ll make you a deal.”

“I’m listenin’.”

You were playing with fire now, and maybe it was the vulnerability of the day catching up to you, but Beth’s words were stuck in your head. There’s going to be someone so much greater out there. 

“Ask me anything you want over dinner.”

Silence. Dead silence. 

You held your breath, waiting for a response, waiting for anything. You could handle rejection, or at least you hoped you could. You hadn’t put yourself out there since Bennett left, and the idea of being unlovable was hard to wrap your head around. Did he ruin you to the point of no return? Was there any hope left?

“I’m not gonna take y’out to dinner and talk about your ex-fiancé,” Joel grumbled. 

“Oh, okay, yeah. I understand.”

The tears were welling in your eyes now, threatening your composure. He didn’t want to take you out anymore; that was fine. Who would want to deal with the broken pieces left in the wake of your past?

“If I’m gonna take you out, it’s gonna be a proper date where I get to know you,” Joel lowered his voice, the sound echoing through your head.

“A date?” You laughed nervously.

“Yes.” He said your name in a stern tone that stalled your breathing. “Quit bein’ all professional, and let me take you somewhere nice so I can really get to know you. That’s all I been wantin’ to do.”

“I’ll make you another deal,” you offered.

“God, you and your damn deals. Alright, let’s hear it,” he chuckled.

“When I’m back, ask me on a proper date.”

“Haven’t I already done that? The offer still stands, y’know.”

“I wasn’t ready to say yes when you asked. I think I’m ready now.”

“Bout damn time,” he laughed. “I swear I’m a patient man, but I’ve been goin’ out my damn mind waitin’ for you.”

“I’m sorry,” you mumbled. That was always the default response these days.

“You’re worth waitin’ for, I promise.”

You were at a complete and total loss for words. How did Joel always say everything you had always wanted to hear? You tried not to compare him to Bennett, but this was far beyond anything you had received in the past. It was foreign but so sweet. You allowed yourself to take the plunge; now, every risk was heightened. If the heartbreak Bennett had caused was this bad, you hoped never to find out what losing Joel would feel like. 

“Y’still there?” He asked.

“Yeah, I’m still here,” you whispered. You didn’t realize how long your thoughts had silenced you. “I’m looking forward to you asking me.”

“And I’m lookin’ forward to askin’…again.”

You smiled to yourself and shoved your head further under the covers. You could hear Joel yawning on the other end of the phone, and you realized just how late it was. You could listen to him talk until you fell asleep, but you wouldn’t keep him any longer.

“Go and get some sleep, Mr. Miller.”

“Y’sayin’ I’m old?” He grumbled.

“I’m saying I can hear you yawning over there,” you quipped.

“Alright, alright. Maybe we should both be gettin’ sleep. Can I call you tomorrow?”

“Yeah, I’d like that.”

“Goodnight,” he whispered.

“Goodnight, Mr. Miller.”

The rest of the week went smoother than you had imagined. After the conversation with Beth, you both fell back into the familiar routine of being close. You’d catch her sliding you small smiles while you were out around the city, a deep concern crossing over her eyes, knowing how hard it was to relive the memories. Boston hadn’t changed, making it easier knowing you had made the right decision to leave. Stella introduced you to her new boyfriend, and your parents cooked a huge dinner to include him in a family evening together. And every night, you’d stay up late talking to Joel on the phone. 

He told you tiny snippets of his day and what had happened at work while you shared pieces of your day traveling around town with family. You noticed how he sidestepped or avoided asking deeper questions about you, and it was sweet knowing that he really wanted to wait for that date to ask those questions. Those late-night talks became something you looked forward to, even if they were filled with mundane things to chat about. 

Friday came quicker than you expected, and you were fidgeting to get on the plane home. Joel had asked the night before when you were landing and insisted on being the one to pick you up from the airport. You were struggling to continue saying ‘no’ to him, and frankly, you wanted him to be the first person you saw when you arrived. 

Austin’s skyline was dotted with lights as the plane touched down in the evening. Those few hours on the plane felt like an eternity, but as you scrambled down the tunnel into the airport, you felt a surge of excitement flowing through your body. Something had shifted over the week between you and Joel; that line between professional and unprofessional slowly disappeared. You were losing the battle inside you to keep your distance from him, and God made it so easy to do that. His charm kept you coming back for more, and the idea of what could happen between the two of you was terrifying, but the risk was beginning to look less dangerous. You felt comfortable, which was far from what you felt with Bennett. You always had to be the best version of yourself, the perfect image of a perfect girlfriend and fiancé. But you realized with Joel, you could let your control slip. He had seen and heard your vulnerability more times than you wanted to allow, yet he didn’t run away. 

He didn’t run away.

That thought slammed into you as you walked through the airport, knowing you weren’t walking towards an empty altar. You were walking towards a man willing to wait for you—for the first time. 

As you made it through the crowd of other travelers, you finally emerged into the lower level of the airport, your eyes darting around to find Joel. In the chaos of bodies walking around, his tall figure stood above the rest, a small bouquet of flowers in hand. Your steps slowed as you approached, your eyes shifting from the flowers to his welcoming smile. 

“What’s this?” you asked, your cheeks pink from running or seeing him; you weren’t sure.

“Figured it would be a nice way to welcome you home,” Joel smiled, handing them to you. 

The flowers were an array of colorful carnations, their orange and pink petals standing out against the green leaves surrounding them. You took them from him and watched as he replaced the flowers in his hand with your luggage, insisting on carrying them for you. He wore a multi-colored flannel, the material stretching over his back and shoulders as he lifted your bags. You stood back, mesmerized, as he led you toward the parking garage. 

“Thank you again,” you said. “I know you had a long work day, so thank you for driving out here.”

Joel looked over his shoulder and smiled at you. You noticed the scruff on his face was a bit grown out from the last time you saw him, but those bare patches still stood strong. There was a strange urge inside you to kiss them and feel the warmth of the skin underneath. 

“It’s no trouble at all,” he said. 

His truck was parked far back in the parking lot, which made the walk together longer than you expected. The smell of the flowers enveloped you as you held them close to your chest. You could only count a handful of times Bennett had gotten you flowers and could count even fewer times he actually picked you up from the airport. Any time you went home to visit family, which was far and few, he used the excuse of work to avoid being there for you. 

Joel lifted your luggage into the backseat of his truck, turning to you once he shut the door. He spoke your name softly, staring down at you as you gave him a curious look. 

“Well, since you’re home now, I’m just gonna ask it,” he started. “Would you go out to dinner with me?”

“I’d love that,” you smiled, a blush crawling up your neck. 

“Good,” he nodded. “I hope you’re hungry.”

“Wait, you mean right now?”

Joel leaned closer to you, tucking a strand of your hair behind your ear. 

“I told you I’m a patient man, but I ain’t waitin’ any longer. So get your stubborn ass in my truck, and let me take you out.”

“You’re relentless, Mr. Miller,” you rolled your eyes. 

Joel opened the passenger door for you, waiting patiently as you climbed in and buckled yourself. 

“I’m gonna make sure you stop callin’ me that by the end of the night,” he said, his eyes trained on you. 

Your breath stalled, and you wondered about the meaning behind his words. Joel probably didn’t mean it sexually, but that’s exactly where your brain went. This was only a date, nothing more, nothing less. You were already giving into him with this; you wouldn’t give in any more than that—no matter how badly you might want to. 

“We’ll see, Mr. Miller,” you smirked.

Joel’s brown eyes darkened at your challenge, and you hoped he didn’t notice how your thighs clenched to quell the warmth pooling inside your stomach. You were staying strong on this one; saying his name meant giving up control entirely. If you gave up the control, you’d give up everything, and you weren’t sure if you could do that to yourself—not yet, at least.

You made small talk with Joel on the drive to his chosen restaurant. It was a casual steakhouse, but you were obviously underdressed from being on a plane for nearly four hours. Joel wasn’t much better either; his attire always seemed too casual and messy. Oddly enough, it was growing on you. You couldn’t imagine him wearing suits or dress-casual attire; it didn’t suit his persona. He was rugged through and through, and you liked that. You had judged him so early on, but the carefree way he carried himself amplified your attraction to him. Bennett always wore some bullshit suit and tie for work, looking overdressed and uncomfortable. Whenever he wasn’t working—which was rare—he still looked like a pretentious East Coast snob with his dress slacks and polo. God, the more you thought about it, the more it pissed you off. 

Once Joel and you were seated at a table and ordered, you found yourself squirming in your seat. Joel’s eyes were warm and unwavering in the restaurant's lighting as he focused on you. With his hands folded on the table, he kept his body pressed forward just to get closer to you. 

“So, I know y’told me you had sisters,” he started. “Beth and Stella, right?”

“Mhmm,” you nodded, sipping the red wine before you. You hadn’t planned on drinking, but your body demanded some sort of aid in numbing the nerves coursing through your veins. “Stella is the youngest. She’s eighteen. She graduated high school this year and started attending Boston College in September. Beth is two years younger than me and works in graphic design for a company in downtown Boston.”

“If Beth is two years younger, that makes you…”

“I’m twenty-seven, Mr. Miller,” you chuckled. 

Joel’s eyes widened a bit, most likely as he realized the age gap between you both. Clearly, he had to have noticed by now, but his reaction was still comical. You nervously bit your lip, wondering if the distance between your age would make him less interested. It’s only a date, you reminded yourself. He wasn’t interested in you that much. 

“Shesh,” he whistled, leaning back into his chair. “I ain’t take you to be that young.”

“Sorry to disappoint,” you muttered. 

He shook his head, reaching for his beer, and you watched him take a long sip before responding. 

“No, it’s not like that,” he reassured. “Y’just surprise me, that’s all.”

“How so?” You asked, leaning forward. 

“Y’act so mature sometimes,” he explained. “You’re big on actin’ professional and adult-like.”

“It’s my job,” you said.

“Bein’ a teacher shouldn’t stop you from enjoyin’ your twenties,” he countered. 

You sighed, nodding along to his words. A lot of things had stopped you from enjoying your twenties, like a particular asshole you thought you’d spend your life with. Being young and careless was never something in the cards for you, and honestly, the closest thing you had gotten to that was the night Joel saw you at the bar. 

“Do you feel like being a young dad did the same for you?” You asked. 

Joel inhaled sharply, scratching the back of his neck. You began to realize he did that a lot; in nervous moments, in moments he was deep in thought, in moments he felt awkward. Right now, you assumed it was because he was trying to formulate some sort of response. 

“I ain’t really had a choice in it. When Sarah’s mom left, I was pretty lost tryna do the ‘dad’ thing. I had to juggle between work and bein’ present, and Tommy was young then, too, so he couldn’t help much. I just tried my best and learned as I went.”

“How old is Tommy?”

“Younger than you,” Joel laughed. “He’s twenty-five.”

“Oh gosh, you guys have a big age gap, too.”

“That we do.”

The waiter brought your meals, forcing the chit-chat to stall while you indulged in the steak and side dishes in silence. Occasionally, Joel would hum as he ate, glancing up at you to see your reaction to the flavors as well. You returned his curious eyes with soft smiles, indulging in how he looked at you like you were something he hungered for far more than the food in front of him. When the plates cleared and your napkins were disposed of, Joel asked the waiter for another round of drinks so that you both had no option but to remain seated in each other's company. 

“What made you want to be a teacher?” He asked, smoothing down the flannel over his stomach.

Your eyes caught onto the movement of his hand as it brushed down his navel, the veins flexing as he readjusted himself in his chair. Joel dipped his head slightly to draw your attention back to his soft eyes, and you instantly felt caught in your actions. 

“I’m not sure, honestly. I’ve always loved literature, and the idea of teaching young kids about it just seemed appealing. There’s a lot of power in words, you know? I want to show them that.”

“That’s pretty poetic of you to say,” he smirked. 

“Well, I hope so. I literally teach poetry for a living.”

Joel chuckled quietly, the lines around his eyes crinkling as his smile stretched across his face. Was it terrible that you were picturing him kissing you? Despite every thought in your head that shouted at you not to think about it, it was all you could focus on. 

“Do you enjoy your job?” You countered. 

“I do, most days. Tommy and I are tryna start up our own business one day, but it ain’t in the cards yet. I need to save up a bit more and hopefully work on gettin’ permits and all that before I can actually do it,” he explained. 

“I believe in you,” you said softly. “You’re a hard worker, Mr. Miller.”

“Well, thank you.” His cheeks reddened at your words. 

Both of you sat in comfortable silence for a moment, stealing shy glances and laughing at the emptiness of words. Joel had said he wanted to get to know you more, but the questions seemed far and few. In your mind, you considered that a second date could be in the cards, seeing as though neither of you had yet tired of the other. Even in the quiet moments, Joel had remained completely enraptured by you, never letting his eyes stray too far from yours. 

“Y’ready to get home?” He asked once the bill was paid for.

“I suppose so,” you shrugged. 

Joel’s hand was firm on your lower back as he guided you out of the restaurant and back to his truck. The featherlike touch against your clothed skin was enough to awaken that warmth back into your body, the feeling of it blooming inside you with each step. Inside the truck, you watched as the streets blurred past as Joel drove toward your home. The night was ending, yet you still ached at the thought of him leaving. You didn’t dare to take anything further, and you still didn’t know if that was something he wanted—or if it was something you wanted. 

Seeing your tiny home was a breath of fresh air as Joel put his truck in park. You gathered the flowers from the seat and quietly helped him unload your luggage. The tension between you thickened with each step as you approached the front door. Turning to him, you smiled and squeezed his arm.

“Thank you,” you said, hesitating by the door. “For tonight and everything.”

Joel’s eyes sparkled under your porch light, the darkness of his irises illuminated and dancing in the shadows. He had shrugged off his flannel after hauling your luggage from the truck, and now it hung over his arms, exposing the corded veins running from his hands to his biceps.

“Of course,” he said your name softly. “Y’look beautiful tonight, by the way. I can’t remember if I told you that or not, but really, you’re beautiful.”

Your cheeks warmed at the compliment, and there was no way of hiding the redness creeping over your face and neck. He watched you with a hungry gaze, his eyes roaming your body. Even if you only stood in a sweatshirt and a pair of jeans, Joel looked at you like you were bare before him. 

“Thank you,” you smiled. “I—I know I look like shit, but thank you.

“Y’definitly don’t look like shit,” Joel insisted. “I’ll plan another date so y’can get all dolled up and look even more beautiful. 

“That’s not really necessary. I mean the dressing up part, not the date part. I’d like to go on another date.” You were rambling at this point.

“Sure it is. The world deserves to see y’look beautiful, even if I want to keep you to myself selfishly.”

“Stop it,” you blushed. “Go get home before it gets too late.”

“You tryna get rid of me that quick?”

“I know how much you enjoy talking,” you laughed.

“Yeah, yeah. Whatever,” he grinned, turning to leave. “Y’have a good night, okay?”

“I will. Goodnight, Joel.”

Then you realized what you had said. 

He realized it, too. 

“Y—,” Joel cut himself off. Shaking his head, he let his flannel fall to the ground. “Fuck it,” he whispered.

Joel swarmed you, pressing you against the door as his hands came up to cup your face. Without a second to breathe, his lips crashed against yours until stars sparked behind your eyes. His mouth was warm as he devoured you slowly, drinking in every noise you made. Every one of your senses was evaded by him: the scent of his cologne drifting over your body, the heat of his skin against yours, the sound of his mouth breathing into yours. You found yourself hesitant at first, adjusting to the hardness of his body pressed against yours. He must have also realized it, his mouth slowing as he pulled away. 

“I—shit,” he muttered. “I’m so sorry. I shouldn’t have done that.”

Your fingers crawled up his chest and gripped at the collar of his shirt, hauling him back to you until your mouth was a breath away from his. 

“Just shut up and kiss me again,” you whispered. 

Then his lips pressed against yours again, this time frantic and all-consuming. You opened your mouth to him, letting him taste the vulnerability spilling out of you, replacing it with desperation you hadn’t yet dared to feel. Your tongue darted out to brush over his bottom lip, and he captured it in another greedy kiss, intertwining himself with you. Joel’s hands moved to tangle in your hair, his fingers lightly pulling as he drew you in closer. Your hands wound their way around his neck; your chest flush against his until all you could feel was the rapid beating of his heart matching yours. There was no way of telling where he began and you ended; you both had melted into one. Lips, teeth, tongue… over and over again, the motion repeated, and you felt the warmth creeping up your spine the more he moved against you. You sunk your teeth into his lip, tugging it slightly, as you pulled away to gasp for air. 

“Joel,” you exhaled, panting softly. 

“Yeah, baby?” His voice was rough as he pressed his forehead to yours.

“What are we doing?”

“I don’t know, but I don’t wanna stop.”

He lowered his lips to kiss down your neck, the chill of his mouth on you prickling your skin. You couldn’t form any words to tell him to stop. You didn’t want him to stop. You were mindless and boneless in his strong grasp, completely untethered from your control. All you could focus on was the way his mouth roamed over the column of your neck, the veins that your blood rushed through throbbing under his lips. Joel’s hand traveled back around, his thumb tipping your jaw upwards so that he could kiss more of your skin. Your eyes blinked at the flickering bulb of your porch light, the sound of crickets chirping somewhere in the distance. His tongue traced a line up your neck, his teeth nipping against your jaw. You let out a soft whine as his mouth connected to yours again, the passion between you snapping into place. 

The night wasn’t ending here. You needed more. The craving was too intense to keep at bay, and you needed him in ways you had been too afraid to admit. Your fingers wound themselves into the curls at the base of his neck, holding him firm against you as you grinned into his open mouth. 

“Come inside,” you mumbled against his moving lips. 

You fumbled blindly for your keys, twisting around to unlock your door; all the while, Joel kept his lips on any part of your skin he could find. He reached around you to shove the door open, and with one arm wound around your waist, you both tumbled over the threshold.

[les4elliewilliams]

Ellie is away... // e.w

Chapter 5 – 2006, Senior year college

a/n: I'm so sorry this took me ages to post. it was actually ready I just kept forgetting to. this is the last chapter, BUT I'm considering making an alternative last chapter. why you may ask? figure it out on your own. MDNI.

cw;wc: 1.3k ; mention of alcohol, angst.

summary: a time before skype and facebook, windows xp just came out and Windows Messenger was the thing of the moment.

➥ part four

brickmaster has signed in

ynshere: babe hiiiii

brickmaster: hiii brickmaster: how's it going gorgeous?

ynshere: better now ynshere: i missed you :(

brickmaster: i know baby brickmaster: we’ll see each other soon, promise

ynshere: will you come over? ynshere: this weekend i mean

brickmaster: sorry baby, can't brickmaster: going out with Riley and her friends brickmaster: if that’s okay?

ynshere: oh ynshere: but you already hung out with her last friday…I haven’t seen you in a while

brickmaster: yn brickmaster: come on, i promise. next friday i'm all yours brickmaster: i really wanna go out, i am allowed to have fun once in a while… I study my ass off every day, i'm stressed as hell

ynshere: i know, i just miss you. that’s it

brickmaster: maybe you could hang out with us? I’m sure she won’t mind

ynshere: you sure?

brickmaster: yeah, positive

ynshere: if i'm not a bother then yeah ynshere: i just wanna be with you :(

brickmaster: you're never a bother baby brickmaster: see you this friday?

ynshere: see you this friday :) ynshere: call me later, maybe? If you got time

brickmaster: yeah, will do brickmaster: i love you

ynshere is typing…

brickmaster is away

ynshere: i love you too

brickmaster has signed in

ynshere: mi amor hiii ynshere: babe? ynshere: hellooooo???

brickmaster: sorry angel brickmaster: i'm here brickmaster: was chatting with Riley lol brickmaster: how you doing?

ynshere: yeah. Riley. of course i'm gooooddd ynshere: missing you tho ;(

brickmaster: me too, pretty

ynshere: wanna go out on a date this weekend? ynshere: just you and me ynshere: no Riley around… we haven't spent time alone in like forever

brickmaster: yeah sure brickmaster: what do you wanna do?

ynshere: hmmm not sure maybe go out for dinner?

brickmaster: sounds like a plan brickmaster: Riley almost got in trouble today in class

ynshere: it's always about Riley lmao what did she do?

brickmaster: basically she snuck alcohol in class brickmaster: she just put it in her water bottle and she goes around with that thing brickmaster: art teacher almost caught her today, we were literally crying brickmaster: i was laughing so much that my stomach started to hurt

ynshere: oh lol

brickmaster: yeah it was exhilarating, you should’ve seen her

ynshere: did you drink as well? ynshere: in class

brickmaster: just a bit..i mean everyone was, sooo

ynshere: you shouldn't drink in class Els ynshere: you don't have to do something just because everyone is doing it

brickmaster: please don't give me the mom attitude brickmaster: this is why i can never tell you anything

ynshere: :/ i'm just looking out for you because i care. you do you

brickmaster: yeah whatever, see you this weekend

ynshere is typing… ynshere: no wait i'm sorry i love you

brickmaster is away.

ynshere: where's my i love you :(

brickmaster has signed in

ynshere: baby ynshere: hi

brickmaster: howdyy

ynshere: howdy? lol is this Joel

brickmaster: lmao no, Riley says it every second brickmaster: I thought it was funny

ynshere: oh haha ynshere: happy 1 year and 5 months together :)

brickmaster: oh yeah shit brickmaster: i forgot. sorry, pretty girl brickmaster: happy anniversary-monthiversary brickmaster: i love you

ynshere: i love you toooo ynshere: i just realized i haven't heard it in a while :(

brickmaster: well yeah i mean you're not supposed to say it every second

ynshere: haven't heard it in months, El

brickmaster: oh please brickmaster: always so dramatic brickmaster:  anyways, i'm going out brickmaster:  i'll call you later brickmaster:  i love you!!!!!

brickmaster is away

ynshere: are you sick of me? love you too

ynshere has signed in

brickmaster: omg babe babe

ynshere: love of my lifee ynshere: what's upp

brickmaster: i'm going to a concert this weekend brickmaster: i'm so happy omg omg

ynshere: oh really? let me guess ynshere: deftones?

brickmaster: yes!!! Freaking Riley surprised me with a ticket this morning, i genuinely cried brickmaster: god she's the best

ynshere: what about me? that's so sweet of her :) ynshere: you think i can tag along too?

brickmaster: sorry babe, i doubt it brickmaster: thickets are all sold out

ynshere: aww shame :(

brickmaster: i knowww but shit fuck i'm so excited

ynshere: i'm happy for you Els ynshere: think it's okay if i come see you next friday? haven't seen you in a month

brickmaster: of course angel

ynshere: yay okay ynshere: my roommate needs my computer real quick ynshere: i'll call you later alright? i love you soo much

brickmaster: talk to you laterr, love you

ynshere is away.

brickmaster has signed in

brickmaster: babe hi

ynshere: hey

brickmaster: how's it going?

ynshere: good, currently studying for an exam. what about you?

brickmaster: just chilling in my dorm brickmaster: it's been a hell of a week

ynshere: right

brickmaster: hey, you sure you alright? you seem off

ynshere: i'm good

brickmaster: yn what's up?

ynshere: it's just ynshere: last week...when i hung out with you, Riley and her friends, i noticed you act so different around them ynshere: and i've been wondering which version of you is the real one

brickmaster: i think you're overthinking it brickmaster: i'm just me

ynshere: you're just distant idk ynshere: you seem more cold, like you don't enjoy spending time with me

brickmaster: it's not like that though brickmaster: you're overthinking

ynshere: alright then, forget it ynshere: i'm going out

brickmaster: thought you said you were studying?

ynshere is away.

brickmaster: alright then.

brickmaster has signed in

brickmaster: hey yn

ynshere: hey

brickmaster: how are you doing? brickmaster: it's been a while

ynshere: yeah i know, i’ve been busy ynshere: i'm doing okay though, thank you for asking ynshere: what about you? brickmaster: yeah me too

ynshere: got plans for tonight?

brickmaster: i think i’m going out with Riley

ynshere: ah cool.

brickmaster: what are you doing tonight?

ynshere: going out with Emma

brickmaster: that's nice

ynshere: yeah

brickmaster: Dina came to visit a week ago brickmaster: she asked me about you

ynshere: oh really? ynshere: what’d you tell her?

brickmaster: well, the truth brickmaster: that we broke up months ago brickmaster: i’ve always assumed she already knew

ynshere: haven’t talked to her in a while actually ynshere: i barely catch her online ynshere: and i'm always busy, so

brickmaster: yeah right brickmaster: i guess that’s why she asked about you

ynshere: most likely

brickmaster: i gotta go now, going out in an hour

ynshere: alright, see you

brickmaster is away.

ynshere has signed in ynshere: Ellie hi

brickmaster: hey

ynshere: how's everything going for you?

brickmaster: everything’s alright

ynshere: can you believe that college is almost over?

brickmaster: yeah it's crazy

ynshere: we’re almost adults

brickmaster: doesn’t feel like it’s been 4 years

ynshere: do you miss high school?

brickmaster: not really brickmaster: i’d rather not think about the past though

ynshere: well, okay ynshere: what are you doing after graduation?

brickmaster: probably moving in with Riley brickmaster: i don't know if i told you, we started dating a couple months ago

ynshere: ah congrats

brickmaster: sorry maybe it's too much?

ynshere: i'm still in love with you nah it's fine ynshere: was i too boring? was i not good enough? how’s your week been going?

brickmaster: it's been alright, just busy

ynshere: what’d you do today?

brickmaster: just school and now homework

ynshere: so, how’s school?

brickmaster: it’s alright. same old same old

ynshere: gone to any concerts lately?

brickmaster: not really, i've been busy with school you know

ynshere: will we ever be the way we were watched any good movies lately?

brickmaster: no, not really

ynshere: is this it for us? how’s Joel doing?

brickmaster: he’s doing alright, thanks

ynshere: i miss you that’s great :)

brickmaster: i think i’m going to go, yn. goodbye

ynshere: please don’t leave me okay, bye Els

brickmaster is away.

¡! daily click・palestine masterpost・do not buy any game from naughty dog, neil druckmann is a zionist・more daily clicks. ¡!

taglist: smelliewilliams onlinelesbo itsbecomeblue macaroni676 tearouthearts diddiqueen liasxeatt seraphicsentences 4ftergloww @benthoee liasxeatt satellitespinner tphmnv kaiilectric bready101 (sorry if i forgot to add anyone)

[literaryavenger]

I just saw a skating show and one of the guys looked like bucky and now I NEED a yn × figure skating partner bucky one shot. With them working on a throw and he's all mad she can't land it then gets hurt and all the angst and comforting. Omg please I'll cry I love you! ❤️

Ok, I have to admit this was my first ask and I got so excited that this got a little away from me. I'd like to say I'm sorry for not putting much technical stuff about figure skating in it but I know really nothing, I did my best researching stuff but it's still not much. I hope you're happy how it turned out, if not let me know! I really just took it and ran with it, I really hope you like it. 🥹❤️

also, sorry it took me a little but my keyboard broke and I had to wait for the new one because writing on the phone I would've made too many mistakes.

On Thin Ice - Bucky Barnes x y/n Stark

Summary: you're paired with Bucky Barnes for an important competition but your negative feelings towards each other make everything much more difficult. Figure Skating AU.

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x female!Stark reader

Warnings: Bucky being an ass. Reader gets hurt. Angst. Language cause why not. Minimal use of Y/N. My poor attempts at being funny.

Word Count: 6.6K

Masterlist

Being a Stark isn't always easy.

Now don’t get me wrong, it’s not like you’re superheroes or anything, but being the daughter of Tony Stark meant that you always had to be not only on your best behavior but you had to be the best in general, no matter what you were doing.

It’s always been a lot of pressure growing up, but it's something you're used to at this point.

All your life there just wasn’t room for failure.

When you were little you hated it, sometimes even hated your dad for it, but you had to give it to him that it made you detail oriented and more driven and focused than most, so with time you came to be grateful for it.

His continuous badgering you into taking various lessons as a kid is also what led you to discover your passion: figure skating.

Skating was something that just somehow came naturally to you, and the more time you spent at the ice rink the more you fell in love with it.

You loved just spending hours going and going, to the point where the world blurred around you and you almost felt like you were flying.

After seeing how happy it made you, your father eased up a bit on you, but he still expected perfection, which you always worked hard to provide.

All you’ve always wanted was to make him proud of you. Which he was and never failed to mention, but you were still terrified of disappointing him.

All the pressure your last name came with was nothing compared to the pressure you put on yourself, you were always your hardest critic.

That is, at least, until you met Bucky Barnes.

You don't know why, maybe he just hates you and likes to humiliate you, but it seems like he always has something to say about your performances.

It all started the very first day you met, you were 18 at the ice rink your father decided to buy for you on your birthday the week before.

You were shocked to say the least when he told you, but he had always been better at showing his love rather than saying it, and don’t ever let it be said that Tony Stark didn’t love his daughter to death.

It was the same place where you skated for the first time when you were merely 5 years old, which you then changed for one closer to your home, but this one held so much more sentiment for you that the extra travel time was worth it, and it was also much bigger, the place where a lot of the important competitions happened. 

The Saturday after your birthday you finally had some free time having just finished exams week and finally being done with high school once and for all, so you planned to meet up with Natasha at the newly named ‘Stark’s snowland’.

Natasha was also a figure skater and you two have known each other since you were 8 years old, participating in almost a lot your competitions together, which usually ended with the two of you in first and second place.

Then Natasha started doing more and more couples competitions with various partners, but you were still always there to cheer for each other.

When she texted she was running late, you decided to just wait for her on the ice so you went inside, put on your skates and just got lost in your head, glad that the early hour meant nobody was around yet.

Then, after having done a few easy moves and having just finished an Axel, you heard some clapping coming from the entrance of the rink.

You stopped abruptly and looked for the source of the noise when you spotted a brunette cheering on you like he was at the Olympics standing beside a blonde that looked kind of embarrassed by his friends' antics.

"Didn’t realize I had an audience." you said, while moving towards them.

"Well, you should with the way you move out there." the brunette said, shamelessly checking you out shortly before receiving a smack behind his head, courtesy of blondie.

"Sorry about him. My name’s Steve," the blonde said while you tried hard not to laugh at the look his friend was giving him. "and this jerk here is Bucky." He pointed at his friend, who seemed to suddenly remember you were there because he turned to you with a charming smile while you introduced yourself.

"Is this your first time skating here?" Bucky asked "I’m sure I would remember a pretty face like yours." he then added, making you blush.

"I usually only come here for competitions, but-" before you could finish talking you heard the door behind them open and Natasha screaming "Stark!" making the boys turn around to look at her.

"Romanoff!" you greeted her, laughing.

Bucky turned back to you, face suddenly all serious, which confused you a lot since he was all flirty smiles until two seconds before. He mumbled something about having to go and almost ran away as fast as he could.

You looked at Steve who seemed as confused as you felt, gave you an apologetic smile and went after his friend. 

You didn’t have much more time to ponder on the sudden turn of events because Natasha was in her skates on record time and raring to go.

All you know is, for the rest of the day you felt Bucky��s eyes on you but every time you turned to him he had a stoic look on his face, and every word out of his mouth towards you was criticism on whatever you were doing.

And here we are now, 6 years later and nothing has changed.

Now 24 and having graduated college, you can be found at Stark’s almost everyday while you figure out the next phase of your life.

It’s honestly not bad, your dad wanted you to intern for him at Stark Industries during college so, after you graduated, you could start working for him full time, but that’s not what you wanted.

If you’re honest with yourself you do want to take over your father’s empire one day, just not yet.

You wanted to keep doing skating competitions, therefore all the free time that you had during college was spent skating. And so, as a compromise, your dad had you teach a few kid classes during the week when one of the teachers unexpectedly quit one day, and you happily agreed.

You did this for all the duration of college, after graduating you kept doing it and, to your father’s delight, took on even more classes to keep yourself a bit more occupied.

It was at the end of one of these classes that you were suddenly approached by Barnes today, which was very rare.

Usually both of you did your best to avoid each other, even when you started being there everyday, you wouldn’t give each other even a second glance, as far as you were concerned.

You’ve liked him when you first met him, but after months of him being nothing but an ass to you, you decided to stop trying and largely ignore him unless you were in a larger group that consisted of you, him, Steve, Natasha, Sam, another friend of theirs that you quickly became friends with, and Scott, a friend you made your first week of college.

Needless to say, you were baffled to see Bucky walk up to you and not immediately insult your behavior during the lesson that just ended, like he usually does when he gifts you with his presence. Instead he said "Hey Stark, can we talk?"

"Uhm… sure. What’s up, Barnes?" you say while starting to put down the cones you'll need for your next class.

"You know the couples competition that we’re having here in a few months?" he asks, following behind you. You think he looks nervous, which you find weird as Bucky Barnes is as confident as they come.

"Yeah, what about it?" You stop what you’re doing and turn around towards him, too curious to not give him all your attention.

"Well, I wanted to sign up, but it seems like I’m missing a partner.,," he says while rubbing his neck, almost embarrassed by what he’s asking.

"Don’t you usually team up with Nat?" you ask him.

"I do, but she’s gonna be out of town that day, and all the other girls are either paired up or not interested…" he explains, still not going to the point.

"Where are you going with this, Barnes?" You ask, crossing your arms in irritation at the time he was wasting while you still have things to do before your next class.

"Are you really going to make me ask?" he almost whines and, when you merely raise your eyebrow, a clearly amused face at his almost desperation, he finally gets to the point of his interruption. "Fine. Will you be my partner?"

Although you suspected where he was going, it's still a little shocking to hear him ask. Before you answer him though, you feel the need to tell him "You know I’ve never done pairs before, right? Not even outside of competitions."

"I know, but I also know you’re a fast learner." at your confused look, he elaborates "You’ve been training here for what, six years now? I’ve seen you learn pretty advanced moves in a crazy short amount of time for last minute competitions or even just for fun. And, whether I like it or not, you’re one of the best figure skaters I’ve ever met." he finishes.

That last sentence has you scoffing at him and starting to get annoyed at him "You don’t need to lie to me just to get me to agree just because you’re desperate for a partner."

"Why would you think I’m lying?" he says while having the audacity to look confused at your anger.

"You do nothing but criticize me all the time! The real question is, why would I ever think otherwise?"

"Just because I criticize you, doesn’t mean I don’t think you’re good!" he says it like was the most obvious thing in the world. "Please Y/N, I really need a partner, and, right now, you’re my only choice. Please." he adds at the end, just for good measure.

To be fair, Bucky had never been this polite or patient with you, and has never even called you by your first name, so it was clear that this was important to him, which is probably what led you to say yes.

He seemed happy for all of two seconds before going back to being the usual jerk, which made you instantly start to regret your decision, but you figured old habits die hard, you just had to be a little patient and he would get easier to work with the more he got used to this. 

Boy, were you wrong. 

For the next three months you met with Bucky three times a week, working out your routine and training sometimes even for hours.

It wasn’t anything you hadn’t done before, but what really annoyed you to no end was finding out that Bucky’s favorite brand of training seemed to be complaining.

All he did was criticize every move you made, right or wrong, even the couples ones you were still learning.

You also found out that being so close to him for such long periods of time made you clumsier than ever, which did not at all help the situation.

All it took was for you to be near him enough to be surrounded by his cologne and suddenly you were falling more than usual, missing your cues and straight up forgetting the next steps of the routine, which only gave Bucky more fuel to add to the fire.

It also didn’t help that whenever Bucky asked you why you were so distracted you lost all your natural Stark sarcasm and could barely get out a sound, not knowing how to tell him even if you wanted to, which you definitely didn’t, that he was the problem.

But you somehow made it through it and, with a week to go before the competition, you had it down to a T.

Or almost.

"Damn it." you say, frustrated with yourself, after you almost fall again on the landing of the throw jump.

The problem with throw jumps is that Bucky has to pick you up and quite literally throw you in the air and, while he does that quite easily, being so close to him right before he throws you disorients you just enough to miss twists and fumble the landing.

A thing that you’d never tell Bucky, which at the moment is giving the most annoyed look you’ve ever seen on his stupidly pretty face.

"Seriously, Stark?!" He almost yells while skating closer to you. "Why the hell is this taking you so long to get right? You’ve done harder things than this both by yourself and with me, so what the hell is wrong with you?"

Like always, you don’t quite know how to respond to him, not even wanting to acknowledge the cause of your concentration problem.

"Let’s just try this again." You say, quieter than you normally would, and get in position.

Your back is turned to him but you can hear him sigh before you feel him move and position himself next to you. You nod at Scott who’s controlling the music, and he starts again.

Everything is going great, until, again you fumble the landing, but this time you fall on your knees. You can hear Scott shouting your name, so you hold a thumbs up to let him know you’re okay.

You can see Bucky getting closer to you with your peripheral vision, but don’t look up or even try to make a move to get up.

You can feel the tears starting to form in your eyes, not because it hurts, but because you’re so frustrated with yourself for not being able to do this.

You’re trying your hardest not to cry out of anger when you see Bucky’s hand in front of your face, a silent offer of help. The last thing you want to do right now is look at his stupid face, so you slap his hand away and get up on your own, ignoring Bucky almost altogether and putting yourself in position to start again from the top.

Bucky comes behind you, but this time you can feel him looking at you while he says, "We don’t have to go again. We can stop here for today." his voice much quieter than it's ever been before, which only fuels your anger more.

"The competition’s next week Barnes, unless you want us to make fools of ourselves, we need to do this until I get it right." You snapped, letting him see you angry for the first time since you started training.

He was a little shocked but didn’t say anything else while he got in position, signaling to Scott to start the music.

All you can think about at this point is the disappointment on your dad’s face if you don’t win the competition, or worse fall like you just did.

You’re not even focused on Bucky anymore, in fact you’re so distracted that you don’t even make it to the throw jump before you fall, except this time you can feel that something’s wrong as soon as you hit the ice.

You can feel pain shoot from your ankle through your whole body and get immediately dizzy, you could barely make out the lights on the ceiling, your eyes going in and out of focus.

You can hear yelling and, once you concentrated, you can make out Bucky's voice saying words like ‘stupid’ and ‘incompetent’, which made you wish you had just passed out so you wouldn’t have to hear him insult you.

Your mind seemed to clear a little and you realized your tears finally started falling at some point, but you didn’t have much time to ponder on that before you were being helped to your feet, Scott telling you he was taking you to the hospital and everything was going to be okay.

You realized Bucky was no longer next to you before you even realized you didn’t have skates on anymore and were barefoot, but you just assumed he was too mad at you to care about your ankle.

-

You’re sitting in a hospital bed with a stomp on your left foot when your dad walks in, worry all over his face.

"Hey junior, are you okay?" you roll your eyes at his nickname, surely you don’t expect Tony Stark to be any less sarcastic seeing you well enough, but you’ve begged him to drop the stupid nickname which he refuses to because ‘but you’re just like me, it's a compliment!’

"I’m okay dad, just have to wear this for a few days." you say, pointing to your foot on a pillow.

"Good. Wanna tell me what happened?" he asks, taking a seat beside your bed.

"Just landed wrong while practicing the routine with Barnes. Too distracted, kept fucking up landings." you tell him, not daring to look in his eyes.

"Pushing yourself too hard?"

He surprises you with this question, but you promptly answer it. "If I was, I would’ve been able to land all my moves correctly. If anything I’m not pushing myself hard enough."

You can’t look at his face just to see the disappointment at your failure, but when you feel his hand on yours you force yourself to look into his eyes, and, to your surprise, there's no hint of disappointment.

"You know, sweetheart, I do mean it when I say you’re just like me. And there is nothing more heartbreaking to me than looking at you and seeing the same self-destructive tendencies I have reflected on you." he wipes a tear you hadn’t realized was falling from your cheek and keeps going. "I hate that I passed that on to you. I should’ve been more careful with you. I thought that letting you know I was proud was enough, unlike my dad, but maybe I should’ve been more specific."

"What do you mean?" you ask, sniffling a bit.

"I’m not proud of you because you always come first in competitions, or because you get the highest grades. I’m proud of you because I know you always try your best and put all of yourself into everything you do. That’s what being a Stark is all about. Plus you’re my daughter so let’s be honest, I’d love you to death even if you were a high school dropout who deals fake drugs to college kids."

You laughed while drying your tears, grateful for your father’s inability to stay serious for too long.

You hug him and say "Thanks, dad. I needed that more than I thought."

You let go of him and tell him about the real reason you couldn’t concentrate: the long-haired asshole with eyes so blue you felt like you were flying in the sky while looking at them, and like you were drowning the second he opened his mouth to say shit about you.

Of course you didn’t put it on those exact terms, but your dad was pretty good at reading between the lines.

By the end he had a smirk that made you want to legally change your name and run away because you just know he’s never going to let you live this down.

"Well, sounds like he’s really something." that’s all he says, weirdly. You eye him suspiciously but he doesn’t add to his sentence.

In fact, he doesn’t say anything more about it until he’s helped you get comfortable on your bed back home.

"You know…" he starts "little boys pull little girls’ pigtails on the playground to get their attention, because they don’t know what else to do." he says.

"Yeah, boys are stupid, so what?" you deadpan and he laughs then surprisingly says "Exactly. Maybe you’re not the only one that feels something here. Maybe there’s a stupid boy that can’t take his eyes off of you, but doesn’t know how to get your attention other than criticize you." he says, clearly happy with where he ended.

"Is this your long way of saying that you think Bucky likes me the same way I like him?" You raise an eyebrow at him.

"This is my long way of saying don’t be a stubborn Stark and try actually talking to him about this. You’d be surprised how fast stupid boys grow up just to keep the girl they want. Just ask your mother." and with that he leaves with a wink, leaving you wondering how much more immature Tony Stark could’ve been to have to grow up enough to sweep Pepper Potts off her feet.

You spend the next few days as a little ball of anxiety on your bed, not being able to do much but overthink about Bucky, only getting a break when Scott came to keep you company.

The day before the competition you've enough and convince Scott to drive you to the ice rink, knowing Bucky was probably there.

When you get there you can hear music but you don’t think much of it until you get right in front of the door and realize it was the song you and Bucky chose. Frowning, you open the door and what you see makes your jaw drop.

There they are, Bucky and Natasha, doing your routine.

You don’t know when you got closer to the rink, but you cannot take your eyes off of them, that is until you hear someone beside you say "they’re good, aren’t they?"

You turn your head to see Sam and Steve, the latter looking at you in a knowing way that almost seems apologetic of Sam’s words, the effect of which Sam doesn’t seem to notice.

You always felt like Steve could see right through you when it came to Bucky, always looking at you like he knew exactly how you felt and how much his words hurt you.

Seemingly reading all the questions swimming in your mind right now, Steve offers you some answers.

"Natasha came back early from her vacation. He brought her up to speed and she agreed to help him out. They’ve been practicing non-stop everyday since the day after you got hurt." Feeling like you have enough information, you turn back to the ice. 

You watch them work in sync, almost like they're connected by wires and one can’t move without taking the other with them.

You watch as Bucky picks up Nat effortlessly and throws her like she's made of air. You watch as she moves so gracefully that it's almost surreal. You see her land every jump perfectly.

Again. And again. And again.

Every jump, every twist, every second you watch them something inside you brokes more.

You don’t know why, Natasha has been Bucky’s partner countless times before and it never mattered to you, and you’ve only skated with him for less than four months.

Maybe it was the fact that they're using the routing you and Bucky had come up with together, maybe you feel replaced.

Maybe it was the fact that you were coming here to talk to Bucky about your feelings and now you were seeing him flying around the ice rink as close with another girl as he was with you, maybe even closer.

They finish the routine and you can hear Bucky’s laughter, you can see his smile as he tells Natasha how perfect she was, how impressed he is at how fast she picked up everything, how glad he is that she showed up when she did.

Then it hits you.

Of course he’s glad she showed up. He never wanted to do this with you, you weren’t even a second choice, it took literally every other girl he knows to be unavailable for him to even think to ask you.

Why wouldn’t he be happy to have her back? He certainly never acted like this with you. He never laughed, barely even smiled...

He didn’t choose you, he got stuck with you.

Suddenly, it’s like everything he’s ever done, everything he’s ever said to you comes crashing down on you all at once.

It’s like you can actually hear your heart breaking and there’s only one thought on your mind: He likes Natasha.

It makes sense, the first day you met he seemed into you, right up until he saw her and the second he turned around he was done with you.

Maybe he started to be an ass just to make that clear, not wanting to actually say anything. After all, he always was very nice to Nat. To everyone but you really.

And it’s not like you could blame him, Natasha’s always been better than you. Growing up she was always your only competition, it’s a fortune you ended up friends really, considering how easy it could’ve been for you to hate each other.

She’s the reason you spent so much time trying to be better, and you’d like to say it was the same for her, but you doubt it very much.

She’s always been prettier, thinner, stronger, smarter, better with boys and at making friends. She was the obvious choice.

Of course she was Bucky’s choice.

You didn’t realize you were so deep in your thoughts, or that you were still staring at them, until you feel a hand on your shoulder and hear Sam’s worried voice asking if you were okay.

You look at Steve and Sam and all you want to do is get out of here. It was already a miracle you weren’t already crying.

Without saying a word you turn around and walk away as fast as you can with the damn stump on your foot. You aren’t fast enough though, because halfway to the door you hear Bucky’s voice, much too close to you to your liking, calling your name.

For a second you think you hear something seeming happiness in his voice, but quickly dismiss the idea and try to keep going, but then you feel his hand on your wrist turning you around to face him.

His face seems to instantly fall as he looks at you and all you can think about is how sick you are of being the only one that takes his smile away.

"What’s wrong?" he asks in a weirdly soft tone, but you can’t find the voice to answer him.

You two just stare at each other until you hear someone clear their throat behind Bucky, and you look over his shoulder just as Natasha starts talking.

"Hi, Stark. Heard what happened to you." she nods towards your foot "Sorry I haven’t been to visit you, we’ve been pretty busy."

You don’t look at her while you answer, turning your eyes back to Bucky, who’s still holding your wrist, while you say "I can see that. Don’t worry, Romanoff, I’m just glad Barnes finally has a partner that’s not incompetent."

All he does is stare confusedly at you, which makes you angry enough to yank your hand away from him, turn around and walk away, ignoring the calls of your name behind you.

You miss the sadness on Bucky’s face, or the way he questions Sam and Steve about everything you said and did since the second you entered.

Bucky, on the other hand, did not miss the tears starting to fall down your cheeks as you turn away.

You decide not to go to the competition the following day. It would be the first time you voluntarily miss one of Nat’s competitions, but you don’t feel like having a replay of yesterday’s show when it’s already been on replay in your mind all night.

Your absence doesn’t go unnoticed by your friends. Nat and Steve being the only ones that understand, even though they’re not very happy about it.

Another thing that doesn’t go unnoticed by the group is how much more agitated than normal Bucky seems to be.

Even during competitions, he’s usually very calm, but today the only thing that makes him stop pacing around the room is Natasha’s sharp ‘would you sit down’ that makes him sigh and sit next to her on the bleachers where they’re waiting for their turn.

He can’t seem to keep his body still as he starts to bounce his leg up and down out of nerves, and can’t seem to stop even when the redhead gets up abruptly with an exasperated ‘for the love of god’ and goes to sit further from him and near Sam, exchanging seats with Steve, who puts a hand on Bucky’s shoulder, effectively bringing out of his head and making his body still with another sigh.

"You know, you don’t have to do this if you don’t want to." Steve tells his anxious friend.

"You know I have to Steve. Otherwise Fury won't let me do other couples competitions."

"I know, but the whole reason you started doing them was for the chance to pair up with Y/N, which never even happened until now." Steve points out while frowning.

"I’m not the one that chooses the pairs, Rogers, it’s always Fury. He’s the whole reason Romanoff and I worked so hard this week just so she could do this. Plus Y/N’s never been interested in these competitions so this whole idea was just stupid to begin with. Now after I finally convince her, she gets hurt and thinks I think she’s incompetent, for some reason." Bucky hasn't been able to stop thinking about what you said yesterday.

Why would you ever think he thinks you're incompetent? He knows he's been a dick to you for years, but never has he ever said you were incompetent.

It's really just constructive criticism given in a poor way. A very poor way... Yeah, he really just has himself to blame for the way you feel about him now, he knows it.

He doesn't even really have a justification for it, either. If he's being honest with himself, he's intimidated by you.

The first time he saw you he thought you were the most beautiful girl he's ever seen, you were so graceful on skates and looked like you were exactly where you belong, lost in your own little world.

Then when Natasha said your name, he realized who he was talking to: the daughter of one of the richest families in town.

He'd heard a lot about you and your family, your impressive achievements on and off the ice. He's ashamed to say he felt small all of a sudden, knowing just from hearing about you that he'd never be good enough for you.

Still, he couldn't help but be drawn to you, couldn't help but watch you as much as he could get away with, but the only way he could justify that without being seen as a creep was to criticize what you did. It made sense, right?

Bucky is pulled from his thoughts, again, by Steve’s voice.

"Well, you were basically yelling that at her when she got hurt last week." at his words Bucky's just as confused as he was yesterday when you stormed out.

"I didn’t…" then it hits him. "I wasn’t talking about her! I was talking about Scott because he wouldn’t hurry up!"

"Oh. Listen, buddy, we both know you like her. You fucked up, big time, and it’s gonna take a lot to get her to forgive you. You could start by stop being an ass to her and apologize." Bucky knows the blonde is right.

It will take a miracle just to get you to look in his direction, let alone allow him to apologize, but he has to at least try to make things right.

He stands up suddenly, startling Steve, and says, "you were there for all our rehearsals, right? You know the routine?"

Steve is confused, but answers with a slow "yeah, why?" but Bucky gives no further explanation, too busy picking up all his stuff.

When Steve puts together what his friend is hinting at, he quickly says "I didn’t mean right now!"

"No time like the present! Go change." he says, nudging Steve toward the changing rooms.

"Buck, if you go now Fury’s gonna kill you!"

"I don’t care!" he yells, basically running out the door and ignoring Natasha yelling his name, the only thing on his mind being running to you as fast as he could. 

Every thought in his head, though, is instantly forgotten as he comes to a sudden stop at the top of the stairs outside of the rink.

There, at the bottom, is you, looking just as shocked at seeing him there as he feels.

After a few moments of just looking at each other, you can’t take it anymore and decide to break the silence. "I didn’t know if I should come in. Didn’t know if Nat wanted my support after I was so rude, you know."

When he doesn’t say anything and just stares at you, you feel the need to keep going.

"What are you doing out here? Did I miss your turn? How did it go?" that seems to snap him out of it and he starts to move towards you, still not saying anything and making you even more nervous as you start regretting coming here.

When he comes face to face with you, finally, he speaks. "I was gonna come looking for you." your brows furrowed in confusion.

"why?"

"I have owed you an apology for a long time now. I’m sorry for being a dick to you for all these years… it really wasn’t about you. I just felt insecure and acted out about it, and eventually I felt so used to it I couldn’t help it..."

You were shocked to say the least, this was the last thing you were expecting tonight. "You felt insecure? Why?"

"Because you’re you!" he almost yelled, gesturing to your whole body and startling you a bit. "I mean you’re a Stark, you’re kind of a legend who lives up to the legend. You’re smart and talented and confident and beautiful. I never thought I’d be good enough for you... I still don’t."

You don't know what to say, but you aren't running for the hills so Bucky keeps talking. "I’d also like to make it clear that I’ve never called you incompetent. I was talking about Lang, that idiot took ages to get his keys to drive you to the hospital. I didn’t even realize you might’ve heard me until Steve pointed it out to me just now while we were waiting our turn and I just had to find you and tell you."

Once everything he said actually registered in your brain, the words came out of your mouth before you could stop them. "Wait, you left the competition to come find me? Natasha’s gonna kill you!"

He chuckles a little while saying, "I’d be more worried about Fury."

"Fury?" You're confused again. "Why would you be worried about Fury?"

"He’s gonna be pissed that I left. He’s the whole reason Romanoff and I trained so hard to make it here, I wanted to skip it after you got hurt, but he said if I did he wouldn’t let me do any more pairs."

"I thought this competition was important to you, that’s the whole reason I said yes. And you wanted to quit it?" You're more confused than ever.

"It was important because it was my chance to finally spend time with you." he says, like it was the most obvious thing in the world. "I’d rather not do our routine at all if I can’t do it with you." he adds, shrugging. 

"really?" you can’t help but smile at hearing him say ‘our routine’ "But you and Nat work much better than you and I do."

"perphabs, but I still think you’re the best there is. Even when it’s with me, a person you hate." He says the last part while looking at his feet, almost afraid of saying it aloud and perfectly aware that he’s the reason why.

"I don’t hate you." you say, almost too fast.

His eyes snap back up to yours. "You don’t? I mean, I wouldn’t blame you if you did. I’d hate me if I were you."

"Sure, I don’t always love the things you say about my skills, but you’ll never criticize me more than I criticize myself. Mostly, you’re just a distraction." you say shrugging, not fully realizing what you just confessed.

"I distract you?" he says with a smug smirk that kind of makes you want to punch him, bringing his hand to your cheek.

You groan but let him keep it there, loving the feeling of his warm hand against your skin. "Don’t get cocky with me, Barnes."

He laughs, but doesn’t say anything else waiting for you to elaborate with an expectant look.

"Fine." you sigh. "Yes, you distract me. You might be a jerk, but I can’t concentrate when I’m around you. All I can think about is the sound of your voice, and the way you smell and the color of your stupid pretty eyes... I can’t help but like you, no matter how much of an asshole you are to me, for reasons I’m sure have something to do with my father."

He laughs again at your last sentence and you swear you’d never heard a better sound. "So I guess I should be thankful for you daddy issues, huh." he says making you laugh with him.

"Yeah, you very much should be." you put your arms around his neck when his hand drops from your face and his arms wrap around your waist. 

"You distract me too, you know. Everytime you’re in the room you’re all I can see..." He sighs. "I’ll never apologize enough for all the things I said to you, but let me try. Let me take you on a date, for starters."

You pretend to think about it all of two seconds before you’re nodding with a smile, so he adds, "What about right now?"

"Slow down there, Romeo, why don’t we go cheer on our friends first." you giggle at his pout while you take his hand and lead the way inside.

When you take a seat next to Sam, just in time to hear the announcement of Natasha and Steve’s names, there's no wiping the smile off of Bucky’s face. His arm goes immediately around your shoulders to bring you closer as you greet Sam that had a knowing grin of his own.

You watch your friends go through the routine perfectly, to your joy and surprise. You really are proud of them, and you make sure to tell them when they are close enough to the edge of the ice while waiting for their score.

"Maybe after we can all go out to eat something." Steve suggests, still slightly out of breath.

"I’m sorry, punk. I have a date that I’m not missing for anything in the world." Bucky answers without taking his eyes away from you, his smile seared onto his face.

Steve chuckles at how whipped his friend already seems to be, moving closer to the judges with Nat when it was time for their scores.

Second place, not bad for a last minute thing.

As you cheer for your friends while they're given their medals, Bucky leans down and whispers in your ear "we would’ve come first."

You burst laughing and Bucky known in this exact moment that he would do anything to hear that sweet sound for the rest of his life.

You look up at him and raise your voice just enough for him to hear over all the screaming, with a smile big enough to match his "We totally would’ve."

[thefirstknife]

Literally every time I tune in for a story update and think "there's no way I'll be taking emotional damage this week" and then I do.

First I really like the added context about what an Echo is, from Ikora:

Genocide. Thousands of civilisations across the universe, all visited by the Black Fleet. All lost to the violence of the final shape. That's where this Echo comes from. At least, that's our theory. Reports from the Pale Heart, readings on the Valence emanating from the Traveler... Everything we faced when we stared down the Witness and broke its fleet. At first, we didn't know what to call them. But Echoes seemed apt. Memories from the victims of the Pyramids, held by the Darkness... then coalesced by the Light into artifacts as sharp and fatal as their pain. If Darkness is memory, and Light is form... What else could they be? But... there's still so much we don't know. Is this the only one? What forgotten people gave form to this Echo? What was their final cry at their end? For control? A means to turn back their oppressors? My Hidden will keep searching for whatever answers the Witness' death can give us... hopefully they number more than the questions it left behind. But we need to stop the Conductor and secure the Echo. Guardian, descend into Nessus. Massive amounts of radiolaria has been diverted beneath the planet's crust. We need to find out what the Vex are building there.

I think it's fair to assume that the memory of the Qugu is what formed this Echo then. That's fascinating also because of what other species we might learn about in the next two episodes.

Psion mention:

Show us the Psions. What are they doing. Don't throw these hints at me, at the same time with Otzot and OXA hints.

And then the emotional damage??? First Saint on the holoprojector:

Guardian. I hear that you are hard at work on Nessus, following the Echo and the Conductor. I know you do this in part for me, but... I do not know if I am worth the trouble. I was pulled through Nessus like a toy on a string. The Conductor's words still echo in my mind, "A copy of a copy of a copy." Osiris pushed through time to find his Saint-14. [sighs] He said he was careful, but... he reached blindly, and pulled out... only me. And no... I live a life tat does not belong to me. I am something left over from a broken timeline... a remainder. The Conductor whispered I should be thrown away... A solution as simple as, correcting an error. And maybe... that would- Ah! I-I do not know what to think anymore.

Saint. "Not worth the trouble"? Saint, I personally walked through the corridors of time to get you out. I had to see your dead body with my own two eyes. I need to tell him this. He has to know. Oh my god.

But also. Osiris did not reach blindly. I am jumping off a cliff! He spent so much time and effort trying to find the right one in the right moment. That was the whole point. But Saint doesn't know this because Osiris never told him exactly what he did. If they don't mention everything we've done in Dawn, I am just going to walk into traffic. This Saint knows that we saved him. That we gave him the shotgun. We saw him in several different moments of his life and he carried the shotgun through: this is important because he died with it originally. So we know it's the right one. That's the only reason the Sundial worked out even; because we're tied to Saint via a paradox.

And then the radio. WHAT is happening.

Osiris: You're only doing this to hurt yourself, and I will not be a part of it. Saint-14: Osiris. Answer the question. I need to know. Osiris: It doesn't matter! Not like this. Saint-14: It matters to me. Please. How did I first tell you that I loved you? Osiris: Saint... [sighs] You had asked me for something, some tactical report. I gave it to you, and you thanked me, and-and you said that you loved me. You said it as if you had, already said it a thousand times before. I was not ready to say it in return, but... it was not long until I was. Saint-14: That is not... I do not remember it this way. That is not what happened in my... my simulation. We were together in the Tower, overlooking the City. Talking about... something small. And I said what I felt in that moment. And my Osiris did not hesitate to say the same. Osiris: "Your Osiris?" Saint, you love me. It doesn't matter how or-or where that began. Not in such fine detail. Saint?

I reiterate. What is happening. We know that the story Osiris told is true because we got it as a lore tab. And we also know that we saved the right Saint. We didn't pick one randomly as he thinks, Osiris and the YW went to great lengths to do this. So what's going on. Did the Conductor mess him up? Saint has not, until now, exhibited any issues with memory and has never had different memories from Osiris or anyone else. What did she do to him when he was yoked? Did she use the power over Vex to mess with his memories? Implant memories the Vex might have in the network about him from other timelines? I'm losing it.

Speaking of the Conductor, we got a firm confirmation it's Maya in the lore tab from Polyphony. And it's MSund12 so that also tells us which Maya; one of the copies from the Vex Network. It also details stuff about her shock upon learning about the Collapse and all that was lost and how humanity never truly recovered. She thinks she can... "help" by using the Vex and simulations. This also links to the mysterious lore tabs on the exotic items from the season pass.

Anyway, I'm perishing.