#playing fast and loose with angelic mythology here

[vintage-bentley]

I know this is good omens and we play fast and loose with religions/mythology here, but: Ba'al (aka Beelzebub) canonically had a wife - Ishtar, or Astarta. (This part may not be the most accurate but afair they were like mirrors to Persephone/Hades and Isid/Osiris) Can you imagine how great of a historical minisode it would be to see her & some other demon pretending to be gods together in ancient east? & with no male-presenting archangels present lmao

You’re telling me that we could’ve had Beelzebub get together with a woman, instead of the awfulness that was Ineffable Bureauhets? That would be so cool! Could’ve had it in a minisode that set up a romance between the two…that way it wouldn’t have felt so forced to have two celestials run off together after 4 years of interacting. They could’ve even made the wife an angel to have the Aziraphale/Crowley parallel.

We were robbed.

[phlintandsteel-ao3]

Before The Beginning

"Do you think of me, while you're out building stars?"

A flutter of wings.

A whisper in the spaces between their atoms.

Red hair lit up like its own halo, like Raphael is twice as holy, twice as important as any other angel.  

And he is...

He is.

"Every moment, angel."

<//>

The moment after the Heavens are created, they are drawn to each other.  From the dawn of existence.  Time hasn’t been invented yet, so there’s nothing to mark the passage.  There is only brushing against their brethren, light interweaving as they rejoice.

When She gives them corporations, it makes many out of one, and secretly, not all are happy with it.  

Raphael misses belonging.  But when fingers run through his hair, marveling at the color, at the curl, he recognizes.

“Oh.  It’s you.”

A nod.  

“Your hair is the color of flames.”

“Yours is the color of starlight.”

They explore their new forms, tracing each other with fingertips, then palms, then pressing close in a snug tangle of limbs.

If they share enough skin, they can feel each other again.

(The other angles do not feel like they do.)  

<//>  

She gives them jobs, right after She creates time.

Something to pass it.  

<//>  

They cling close, spirits mixing and dipping into each other along the places where their skin touches.

<//>

“This nebula is truly one of our most beautiful projects to date…  Did She give you the suggestion for the color?”

“No.  It’s the color of Jehoel’s eyes.”

Gabriel blinks, stares at him too long.

“But since She made Jehoel, I suppose in the end, it actually was Her idea…”

The corporation that is Gabriel relaxes.

It is the first time that Raphael wonders.

(The questioning comes later.)

<//>

“I miss you when you’re off creating constellations…  It’s...cold without you.”

“You know my hair isn’t actually made of fire, right?  Isn’t that supposed to be your element anyway?” Raphael teases, pressing his forearms all along Jehoel’s back, crisscrossed in between his wings, holding him close.

(Curse these corporations that keep them apart.)

“I meant inside,” Jehoel admonishes, pressing his cheek more firmly against Raphael’s neck, baring his soul to him as best as he can.  

“Shhh, I’m here now, angel,” Raphael squeezes him tight.

<//>

(Isn’t it blasphemy, for Her Grace to not be enough?)

<//>  

"Do you think of me, while you're out building stars?"

A flutter of wings.

A whisper in the spaces between their atoms.

Red hair lit up like its own halo, like Raphael is twice as holy, twice as important as any other angel.  

And he is...

He is.

"Every moment, angel."

<//>

“If the forms of our existence can change, cannot the names attached to them as well?” Jehoel asks.

Raphael blinks at him.  

“Why do you call me ‘angel’?” Jehoel frames Raphael’s face with his hands.  

Their legs are twined together, stomachs pressed close.

They only breathe to feel the rise and fall of each other’s chests.

“Because…”

(Because he’s not Jehoel.  He’s not.  We should be the same, but admitting it feels too much like a reprimand.)

“Because ‘Jehoel’ has never felt quite right, has it?  Not to you, and not to me,” Jehoel admits, his eyes tracing the thoughtful curve of Raphael’s brow.

“What do you want to be called, then?  What feels right?” Raphael asks, shifting to rub a thumb over the back of the hand cupping his face.  

“In my spirit?  ...I would be called Raphael,” Jehoel whispers.  

“We can’t both be Raphael,” he reminds him, voice shaking as he yearns.  

(Yearns for when the two of them were made of the same atoms, the same light.)  

“Then I shall be Aziraphale, instead.”

Raphael’s soul sings as a joyful smile spreads over his face.  He can feel the harmony it creates with Aziraphale’s, so close, right there under his skin.  They both move to get as close as possible as quickly as they can, pressing against each other even more, willing the torrent of emotion to spill over into light, into the oneness that they lost.  

In their haste, Aziraphale’s smile bumps against Raphael’s.  

Oh.  

Neither of them thought the parts they used to communicate could be used to communicate this.  

“Aziraphale…”

Raphael presses their mouths together again.

The veil is lifted.  

Aziraphale surges forward, in corporation and in spirit, filling Raphael with a hurricane of suppressed longing.  He’s swept aside in the torrent of it, gone.  He isn’t just himself anymore, they’re them.

(He yields instantly.)

(Willingly.)  

It’s not the all consuming oneness of before, but it’s close.  So close.  

“Oh, my clever Aziraphale…”

“Stop talking, my dear.”

<//>

They don’t talk to each other for a long time after that.  Three nebulae and a galaxy’s worth.  They have better things to do with their mouths once obligations are done.

<//>

(They should have talked.)

(Maybe Raphael wouldn’t have questioned, if they had...)

(But maybe Aziraphale would have where he hadn’t before…)

<//>  

When She creates the humans, everything changes.  

Raphael can see why she adores them.

(But the other angels do not feel for humans like She does.)

<//>

It takes the humans a much shorter amount of time to realize the intimacy of mouths on mouths than it did Raphael and Aziraphale.

<//>

(Why?)

(Why not?)

(Why us?)

(Why them?)

<//>  

Raphael is on shift during The Betrayal.  

When Lucifer betrays Her, Gabriel bears witness against Raphael and his questions.

Light cannot escape the strength of his grief when Raphael realizes that questioning will be punished with losing everything.  

(At the center of a black hole is love.)

<//>

Good and evil.

Light and dark.

Up and down.

You and me.

All Her creations are double edged swords.  

(Be careful how much you want to know.)

<//>

It is supposed to be part of their punishment, that demons remember while angels do not.  

For Crawly though, it is only mercy.  

If his angel suffered without him as he did, well…  Then he would have lost faith entirely, like the rest of his brethren.

(As it is, he's the one who’s lost both the most and the least.)

(He isn’t sure what Lucifer is on about, that prat never loved anyone but himself.)

<//>

The forces of Hell spend rather more than seven days trying to break in to the Garden.  

In the end, it is Crawly and Crawly alone who can slither through.

(Go up and make some trouble.)

He can feel it as he burrows, feel it in his bones, that the only reason he can pass through the barrier is because Aziraphale is on the other side.  

(But he keeps that to himself.)

<//>

When he stands in Aziraphale’s presence for the first time in an eon, he can tell his angel is...diminished…

(But still Aziraphale.)

(Always Aziraphale.)

<//>

“You gave it away?!?”

<//>

(He gave it away.)

<//>

Aziraphale may be a Principality now, and Crawly may be a demon, but there’s still a strange sort of leftover resonance in their souls, drawing them to each other, only feeling truly at ease in each other’s company.  

<//>

“What?  You can’t kill kids!”

Crawly can feel the vacillation in him, even if Aziraphale doesn’t say anything, and he clings to it.  

(It feels like hope.)

<//>

“What was it that he said that got everyone so upset?”

“Be kind to each other.”

“Oh, yes, that’ll do it…”

(There are too many conflicting emotions in him to parse each one out.)

(So he just watches on in horror.)

<//>

Crowley gets called back down below, where all Hell has broken loose.  

Because the keys have been taken.

Lucifer’s lost his greatest leverage in his self proclaimed war against Her, which was the human souls he’d been hoarding down there.  

Everyone has to report back for some sort of giant strategy meeting.  

(Which is ridiculous, because they’re all just doing as they’re told.)  

It’s a pain and a mountain of paperwork and a swearing of allegiance to a new plan and all Crowley wants to do is run his fingers through hair like strands of starlight again.  

(He remembers the stars.)

(He’d trade them all to feel the touch of Aziraphale’s skin again.)

<//>

Lucifer leans forward on his throne, head tilted just so, to make sure the light of the flames bounces properly off his cheekbones.  

“Do you love him?”

Crowley doesn’t think of warm hands and warmer mouths.

“I remember him.  I remember what loving him cost me.”

(He thinks of stars collapsing instead.)

By some miracle, Lucifer is placated.  It might be for the very first time.

(What the devil is She playing at?)

<//>

Crowley isn’t sure which is the worse torment, being in Hell without Aziraphale, or walking the earth with him so close and yet so far.  

<//>

(Is this part of your plan?)

<//>

He takes it back.  Being friends by Arrangement is the worst chaos of a feeling ever.

(But it’s also the best.)

At least they can make up for all the talking they didn’t do before.

<//>

It takes everything in him not to grab Aziraphale by his frilled lapels and kiss him senseless in France.  But he knows it wouldn’t go over well.  

He has to keep telling himself that this isn’t his Aziraphale.

(But it is.)

(It is.)  

He’d do anything just to be allowed to stay at his side.

<//>  

“Anthony?”

“You don’t like it?”

“No, no, I didn’t say that…  I’ll get used to it.  What does the ‘J’ stand for?”  

“It’s, uh, just a ‘J’, really…”

(Lies told in a temple should burn more, shouldn't they?)

(It’s a ‘J’ to remind him that angels have free will too.)

Their hands brush as he hands over the rescued books, and there’s shock in it, shock at the tendril of love interwoven.  

(It’s enough to sustain Crowley for another 6000 years, the whisper of love in Aziraphale’s touch.)

(He wishes he could craft another hundred nebulae the exact shade of Aziraphale’s eyes in that moment, but his angel isn’t the only one who’s been diminished.)

(Falling made them all less.)

<//>

“Anywhere you want, anywhere at all,” he offers.

But what he means is please, choose me.  

<//>

And suddenly, he’s out of time.  

The End is upon them, Hell is onto him, and Aziraphale doesn’t remember him.

“The forces of Hell have figured out that it was my fault.  But!  We could run away together!  Alpha Centauri, lots of spare planets up there, no one would even notice us!”

(Choose me, his soul screams, just for once, choose me!)

“Crowley, you’re being ridiculous.  Look, I’m quite sure if I can just, reach the right people, that I can get all this sorted out…”

“There aren’t any right people,” Crowley says, dumbfounded, getting right up in his face, “There’s just God, moving in 'mysterious ways’ and not talking to any of us!”

“Well, yes, and that is why I’m going to have a word with the Almighty, and then the Almighty will fix it.”

“That- won’t happen…  You’re so clever, how can somebody as clever as you be so stupid?” Crowley asks, aghast.

“...  I forgive you.”

(So that’s it, then.)

(After 6000 years, Crowley snaps.)

(What reason is there to keep holding on?)

(Maybe he’s been deluding himself this whole time….)

“I’m going home, angel.  I’m getting my stuff and I’m leaving!  And when I’m off in the stars, I won’t even think about you!”

<//>

(Well, he thought he’d snapped at the time.)

(When he really snaps is screaming at both Heaven and Hell on the floor of a burning bookshop.)

(He imagines this is what Falling felt like for the rest of them.)

<//>

"I lost my best friend…"

"I'm so sorry to hear it…"

(Something in Aziraphale shifts, to see that Crowley didn't leave without him after all, that Crowley stayed.)

<//>

After the failed End, things are almost too quiet in comparison.  

Aziraphale wears his own face again.

Perhaps it’s for the best that he doesn’t remember, in this moment.  

(Because the symbolism would break his heart.)

(God knows it would break Crowley's, if he allowed himself to think about it.)

They stay together, without going off anywhere, just living their lives, but together.  

<//>

The first time Aziraphale leans toward Crowley with the intent to kiss, there is no other word to describe Crowley's posture but nervous.  

"Is this alright?" Aziraphale whispers.

"It is.  God, Aziraphale, it is.  It's just, I'm not sure what will happen…" Crowley confesses.  

Aziraphale smiles at him indulgently.

(Because he doesn't know.)

(Maybe Crowley should stop him…)

(But he doesn't have the heart to seriously consider it.)

(It feels like he's been waiting an eternity for Aziraphale to choose him.)

When Aziraphale presses his lips to Crowley’s, it’s soft, no surging or toppling him over onto his back like the first first time.  Aziraphale kisses like he doesn’t know that souls are for pouring, but it’s more than Crowley ever expected to feel again.  

“I…  Crowley, have-  …  Have we done this before?” Aziraphale asks him, confusion writ hard upon his face, “I would remember if we had done this...but…”

“But not if She took it away…” Crowley whispers, his eyes still closed.

(Were they told not to speak of it, or was that just his own self preservation?  It’s not like any angel would have ever believed a demon about it…)  

(But now...)

(But now…)

“What do you mean She took it away?”

Crowley opens his eyes.  

“I mean…  In the beginning, there was us.  Before.”  

“Us?” Aziraphale asks, a slow terror dawning over his face, “Before what?”

“Before I questioned!” Crowley answers, his voice too loud compared to Aziraphale’s.  “Before the Fall, before the humans, before time itself was set spinning, there was us.”

“Us,” Aziraphale echos, brushing his fingers over his own lips.  “I…  I think I believe you…  But why-”

“Oh, come off it, angel,” Crowley practically jeers, his emotions spinning completely out of control.  

(Healer, heal thyself.)

“It was part of our punishment, to remember.  Think about it.  You know all demons were angels before the Fall, but do you remember any of us?  Do you remember me?  I know you don’t,” Crowley spits out, so close to breaking that he risks complete and utter ruin if this goes badly.

Aziraphale looks terrified as Crowley is speaking, but instead of answering, he kisses him again.

And this time he pours his heart into it, no holding back.  

It burns.

(But god, Crowley could die happily this way.)  

“Is…  Is it supposed to feel like this?” Aziraphale pulls back, tears in his eyes.  

“You were the angel of fire, you’ve always burned a little…”

“Of fire?...  No I wasn’t.  I’ve always just been, me,” he frowns.

“No...you weren’t...” Crowley insists softly, “Well, you’ve always been you, but you used to be more, just like I did…”

Aziraphale shakes his head, like he can’t fathom the concept of everything he’s finding out, everything that’s been taken from them.

“Wait.  The angel of fire’s name was Jehoel,” Aziraphale says hesitantly, like he isn’t sure if he wants Crowley to be lying to him after all or not.

“Yes.  But you chose to be Aziraphale instead,” Crowley makes a helpless motion with one shoulder.

“I chose?  I…  I don’t remember...” Aziraphale adds, sounding frustrated.  

“I know…”

“Crowley, what were you the angel of?” Aziraphale asks, as if he’s just now realizing how strange it is that he’s never asked before.  

Then it’s Crowley’s turn to shake his head.  

“It doesn’t matter.”

“It matters to me.”

“Leave it, angel.”

“You can’t tell me things like this and then not answer my questions, Crowley,” Aziraphale chastises him, starting to look distraught.  

Crowley gives him a horrified look, just now realizing what Aziraphale is dancing along the edge of, by questioning.

Aziraphale’s face softens, but he still looks hurt, confused.  Not by Crowley, but by the situation.  “Why would I be diminished?  I didn’t fall…  Did?...  Did She change me?  From Jehoel into-” Aziraphale pauses and motions at himself.

Crowley jumps into the pause and says, “No, angel.  You chose to be Aziraphale, long before the Fall, ages beforehand.  That wasn’t what diminished you, that was...that was something She did later...” Crowley trails off.  

(He’s not going to say the words ineffable plan.  Not here, not now.)

Aziraphale stills.  It’s not the peaceful stillness that angels are supposed to be known for.  It’s an angry, teetering stillness.  One that when it tips over, promises violence.  

“Crowley, what was your name, before you fell?”

(Damn his clever angel.)

Crowley hesitates, swallowing hard as his throat threatens to close up.  

“Crowley,” Aziraphale repeats himself, insistent, “What was your name?”

With a trembling hand, Crowley reaches up and cups his angel’s cheek.  

“It was Raphael.”

Aziraphale’s face looks like it’s about to shatter.  

Crowley is ready to grab the pieces of him, if need be.

(Always Aziraphale.)

And then the anger comes flooding forward.  

“How dare She.”

“Aziraphale…” Crowley whispers, not sure if he can or should or even really wants to calm him down...  

“How dare She,” Aziraphale repeats, his anger far beyond righteous.

(Words like primal were invented for this.)

Before Crowley can say anything else in return, the two of them are suddenly bathed in a blue-white light from above.  He freezes in terror, eyes going wider than they ever have before.  

But Aziraphale, his clever, beautiful Aziraphale, looks up, and rages.  

“Give it back.”  

Crowley’s heart skips a beat.  

“Aziraphale, you don’t know what-”

“Give it back!” Aziraphale cuts off the Almighty, “He may not have known the consequences, but I do.  Give me back my memories,” he demands as angry tears start to pour down his face.  

“Aziraphale…” Crowley says helplessly, his whole corporation starting to shake and tremble.  

“You said we had a choice, but you took mine away from me,” Aziraphale admonishes God, “You had already taken my memory of him away when you told us of the Fall.  That’s not a choice, that’s a lie.”

The sadness clinging to the air around them is so strong that Crowley feels like he’s choking on it.  

When no response is forthcoming, Aziraphale turns his face down and away from the light of God.  

Sparks and embers begin to swirl upward out of him, like a log disturbed on a campfire.

(This is what happens when you kick the angel of fire too many times, Crowley thinks a tad hysterically.)

Aziraphale falls to his knees, crying out in pain.  

Crowley catches him, eases him down while they cling to each other tightly.

(God, it burns.)

(It was always going to.)

The sparks intensify, until Aziraphale is consumed, until they both are.

But Crowley doesn’t let go.

This is their choice.

An informed one this time.

(We should be the same.)

(The same light.)

(The same fire.)

(The other angles do not feel like they do.)

(He yields instantly.)

(Willingly.)

(He remembers the stars.)

(So that’s it, then.)

(At the center of a black hole is love.)

Falling made them all less, but somehow, it makes Aziraphale more.  And Crowley is swept along with him, their fetters removed, shackles broken, fire and stars at their fingertips again, now that they’re on the same side.

(God, show me your Great Plan...)

After She leaves, it’s silent for a long time while they exist.

“Raphael?...”

“That’s not my name anymore, angel…”

A thoughtful hum.  

“But I remain Aziraphale yet...  I think, because I chose that, She cannot take it away from me...”

Crowley lifts his angel’s hand, presses a kiss onto the back of it.  They’re still laying on the floor, all pretenses and trappings of humanity stripped away, burned away by the Almighty’s light.  

“Do you want to call me ‘Raphael’ again?” he asks, quiet, accepting of any outcome.  

“Aziraphale is my rebellion, but ‘Crowley’ is yours, my dear.  I’m not going to be offended if you want to keep it.  I’ve grown rather fond of it, actually.”

“Ok, angel.  Ok,” Crowley finds himself smiling.  

“You know, I’m not an angel anymore…” Aziraphale points out.

“That’s not what I mean by it,” Crowley assures him, still smiling.

Aziraphale smiles back.

“I know.”

When Aziraphale rolls them over, hovering over Crowley, the intent to kiss him for eternity written plainly on his face, it takes Crowley’s breath away to see his new form.  

“Aziraphale,” he says, a benediction now, no longer a plea, “Your wings are red…”

A nod.  

“Yes, I thought we’d go well together that way, without being too matchy-matchy.”

Crowley is laughing when Aziraphale finally leans down to kiss him, unable to resist tasting the joy on his lips for a moment longer.  

Kissing on the floor of Crowley’s flat for a year and a day may seem excessive, but it’s not.

(It’s not.)

(It’s really not.)

They used to kiss for decades, they used to kiss for centuries when they could get away with it.

(Plus, in Heaven, there was nothing else all that interesting to do but steal each other’s atoms and tuck them up close inside their hearts.)

But Aziraphale pulls back after only a year, and Crowley whines in protest, following his lips upward.  

“I’ve been thinking…”

“Well I haven’t, I’ve been kissing you,” Crowley complains ineffectually, already feeling the stretch of their souls separating and settling back into their own corporations like taffy pulled too far apart.  

Aziraphale smiles indulgently at him.  

“Some of us can do more than one thing at once, my dear.”

“Not all of us are Cherubim of unfathomable power, angel,” Crowley grumbles.  

“Are you, overwhelmed?...” Aziraphale grins, leaning down close again.

“By you?” Crowley says, wrapping all his limbs around Aziraphale like a limpet, “Always.”

He tucks his face into the crook of Aziraphale’s neck and just, holds on tight.  

“Oh darling…  I can’t even imagine what you’ve been through, these 6000 years,” Aziraphale cups the back of his head, sliding fingers up into his red locks.

(In his true form, Crowley’s hair was like a tumble of lava, like a curtain of a million red stars burning and twisting around each other at once.)

(Aziraphale could spend eternity running his fingers through it.)

“Don’t get all mushy on me now, angel,” Crowley says, his voice cracking.  

“I make no promises...”

Crowley squeezes him extra tightly for a moment, before settling back against the floor again.  

“What have you been thinking about?” Crowley asks, knowing they really aren’t going to be able to just kiss for the next century, as much as they both might want to.  

“Us.  And Heaven, and Hell,” Aziraphale tells him, growing pensive.  

“We…  Surely, we must have a little more time?” Crowley says.

“If we didn’t, would you have wanted to spend it any other way?” Aziraphale asks, giving him a quick peck on the lips.  

“...No,” Crowley admits, “Is this it, then?  Can...can you feel them coming for us, somehow?”  

“Not as of yet,” Aziraphale shakes his head, “But it’s only a matter of time, isn’t it?”

“What are we going to do?”

“Well, the way I see it, we have two options.  We could run, but, it couldn’t be to any place within Creation.  She’d still be able to find us, no matter how distant the nebula…” Aziraphale tells him sadly.

“The only thing outside Creation is the Void, Aziraphale, we can’t go there.  No one but God Herself has ever survived it.  There’s no stars, no space there, just nothingness…”

“And yet, every constellation brought into existence overwrites it…” Aziraphale points out.  “Also, it has come to my attention recently that omission is not the only lie being perpetuated upon us by the Almighty.”

“Even if we could survive it,” Crowley says, scrubbing a hand over his face and pinching the bridge of his nose, “Honestly?  That kind of sounds like the easy way out now, running from our problems…  And, there’s no books in the Void, no Bentley’s…  What’s option two?”  

“Well, in order to fix all this, truly fix it…  I believe we will have to kill Lucifer.”

“...” Crowley blinks at him.  “Angel, my darling, I think the Fall may have gone to your head a bit...” he suggests calmly, eyes worried.  

“I don’t mean to rule Hell, if that’s what you’re thinking,” Aziraphale tuts, because it’s very obviously what Crowley is thinking.  “What I mean is to end the War, but not by fighting it.  I don’t think I need to explain to you the impossibility of getting Lucifer to call things off on his end.  But if it wasn’t his call to make anymore…”

“Exactly how is that not ruling Hell, again?” Crowley asks.

“Because once Lucifer is gone, we will tear it down.”

Crowley surges forward, sits up so that he and Aziraphale are on a more even level.  

“Aziraphale, you cannot set loose the hoards of Hell upon the earth.  I didn’t think I needed to explain to you how completely awful I am at being a demon, I am, literally the worst demon in existence, going off evilness, you cannot base the rest of them on me.  Granted, some of them are only half bad, but, there are some beings down there that would like nothing better than to reek havoc and terror on humanity for the rest of their days…”

“That is why they would not be let loose, they would be watched, retrained, so to speak, by me.”

Crowley doesn’t question his ability to do it.

As a one of the Cherubim, protecting the Garden, and by association the entire earth, had been Aziraphale’s job.   

“That’s a...rather hands-on approach…” Crowley says, jaw hanging open.  

“Well, someone needs to take one.  Humans get a second chance, why shouldn’t demons?  This is getting rather ridiculous, don’t you think?” Aziraphale counters.  “Why do we have to serve Lucifer just because we refuse to serve Her?”

(How do you refuse to serve a plan you don’t understand?)

“Thinking you’re better than your superiors is a dangerous game to play, Aziraphale, he’s the Morning Star,” Crowley says, shaking his head.

Aziraphale reaches out and cups Crowley’s cheek, stroking a sword-callused thumb over it.

“How many suns have you created?”

Crowley’s eyes go wide.

“That’s different...”

“What are the odds,” Aziraphale says slowly, so that it has plenty of time to sink in, “That Lucifer is diminished as well?”

(Falling made them all less.)

“Ok...  But.  Even if we could kill him, that doesn’t guarantee that She’ll stand down, Aziraphale, She could still set Heaven upon us and try to wipe us all out.”

“She could…  But worst case scenario?  The absolute, most final, irreversible scenario?  Is that She undoes us completely, erases us from existence.  And my dear, I think, if She really meant for it to end like that?  That She would have already done it.  But She didn’t.  She let me Fall instead…”

“Fuck...  Are we really doing this?”

“If we want to stay together, here, on earth, I think we have to.  Besides, even if we had another 6000 years of being ‘left alone’, it wouldn’t be enough.  I demand eternity at your side,” Aziraphale declares to him passionately.  

(And sometimes, that’s all there is to it.)

<//>

(In the Beginning, God created the Heavens and the Earth.)

(And God looked upon Her creation, and saw that it was good.)  

(Who judges, when God is created?)

(What good is just beginning over?)

<//>

Having watched Crowley go in through the front door so many times, Aziraphale certainly knows the way into Hell.  

He does not saunter in.  

He unfurls his wings, all four of them, blood red and shimmering, and calls up an armor he has not worn since before the invention of man.

The front doors explode inward under a single touch of his finger.  

Demons scream and scurry away from his presence before even having a chance to see him.  

“Lucifer!” Aziraphale calls out, making his intentions clear, “Where is he?”

He meets no resistance, absolutely none, until he gets to the little throne Beelzebub has set up outside the Dark Counsel’s chambers.  

And even then, it’s hardly resistance.  

“What’s going on here?” they bluff. 

But Aziraphale can feel their fear.

(No other Cherubim has ever Fallen.)

(And the only Seraph who did, well…)

“You have taken him, and I intend to get him back,” Aziraphale seethes.  

(He doesn’t need to elaborate, because now he knows that demons know.)

(Know what Crowley is to him.)

(Know what they were.)

(Know what was done to them.)

Beelzebub steps aside, even as they say, “He’s not here, we don’t have him…”

“I guess we’ll see, won’t we.”

Aziraphale floats up the steps to the chamber’s doors, rolling his eyes internally at the ridiculous figures and symbols carved into it.  

(They mean nothing to a being of his power.)

For these doors, he uses his whole palm.  They dissolve with a boom under his power, leaving a gaping space that four of Aziraphale could walk though.  

(He manages to fill it up though.)  

The Lords of Hell turn from their various debaucheries and hiss at him, drawing their weapons, leaping toward him with murderous intent simply for daring to be an intruder.  

Aziraphale raises both arms out in front of him and snaps his fingers, wiping all of them out of existence at once.  

There’s a strangled sounding noise from behind him, probably Beelzebub.

(Good, let them bear witness to what’s about to happen here.)

Even the Dark Counsel's playthings are erased, leaving Lucifer and Aziraphale alone.

(Small mercies.)

Lucifer stands up from his throne.  

He tilts his head, hands clasped behind his back like he’s unfamiliar with taking any pose but condescension.  

“If this is supposed to be an...audition, you’ve got my attention-” Lucifer squints at him, tilts his head the other direction, “...Aziraphale.”

“Nothing of the sort,” Aziraphale says at the same moment that Crowley, in snake form, jumps quick as lightning from his hiding place under the throne.

He wraps himself around Lucifer’s hands and middle, like a living restraint, keeping his arms behind his back.  

“How dare-  You insolent piece of scum!” Lucifer rages.  “What the fuck do you think you’re doing?”

“I believe,” Aziraphale says as he summons his sword to him, his old sword, the broad one that takes two angelic hands to wield and could cut down a dozen foes at once, “The technical term is an execution.”

Lucifer laughs, incandescent rage still pouring off of him in waves.

“You think I need my hands to fight you?  You think this very realm itself doesn’t obey my commands?” Lucifer sneers.  

And then everything is on fire.  

The very air itself is made of flame, and not just of regular hellfire either.  This is The Fires of Hell, that which destroys even demons, that which torments the very souls of humans, long after their bodies are gone.

There are multiple screams from the doorway, where the gathering watchers have to suddenly reel backward for their lives.  

Lucifer laughs maniacally for a long minute, which, that alone would make an observer question his sanity, forget everything else…  

Eventually, he stops laughing though, and wills The Fires away.  

“You know, you always were the brightest star,” Aziraphale says, causing Lucifer’s jaw to drop, “But not exactly the brightest pupil.”

“What!?  How!?”

“I’m The Angel of Fire, idiot,” Aziraphale says primly, then takes the Morning Star’s head clean off with one swing.  

(There are perks to being soul bound to the former Angel of Fire.)

(And Crowley likes this whole immunity to fire thing too.)  

“Don’t forget hisss heart,” Crowley stays holding on tight, even through the pain of being in contact with Lucifer’s bare skin this whole time.  

“Of course, dear,” Aziraphale says, stepping forward, “I’d not forget a thing like that.  Are you out of the way?”

Lucifer’s corporation is still standing, still struggling, even as his head comes to rest a short ways away.  

“Yesss, jussst do it!”

“You fools, we’re on the same side now!” the head screams at them, blood already matting his golden locks.  

Aziraphale looks Lucifer directly in his decapitated eyes as he says, “We’re on our own side.” 

Then he pierces the blade through the Morning Star’s chest.  

What’s left of Lucifer falls to its knees.

“Leave the blade in, he’sss not dead yet!” Crowley warns, tightening even further against the thrashing.  

“Oh?  What was your first guess?” Aziraphale says, motioning to the head that’s begun screaming continually.  

“Jussst end it already!” Crowley urges him.

“What else do you want me to do?  I can’t take the sword out again!” Aziraphale says.

“I don’t know, angel, killing isssn’t my department,” Crowley hisses, “Jussst, do sssomething!”

Aziraphale looks between the severed head and Crowley, back and forth, until suddenly an idea flashes across his face.  

(To err is to exist.)

(To be inspired is divine.)  

He drops to his knees, placing his hands on Lucifer’s forehead, and calls up all the power he possesses within him.  

(How many times did he see Crowley do this?)

(How hard can it be to do the reverse?)

(What’s the opposite of healing?)

Light bursts out of Aziraphale and Crowley both.  

The face of the Morning Star crumbles.

The screaming stops.

His corporation is crushed within Crowley’s coils, leaving only ash behind to float on the super heated air.  

It’s dead silent in the throne room of Hell.

Aziraphale grimaces as he wipes the ash off his hands.  

Crowley slithers over to him, climbing right up him and draping himself around his angel’s shoulders.  

“Are you alright, my dear?” Aziraphale asks, running soothing hands along Crowley’s scales.  

“Yesss.  It ssstingsss, but I’ll live.”

“Not that I don’t love having you all over me, dear, but perhaps it would help to transform back?” Aziraphale points out as he climbs the few stairs up to Hell’s throne.  

“Perhapsss,” Crowley says, but makes no move to disentangle himself.  

Aziraphale smiles to himself as he turns around and sits on the throne.  

A mass of demons, lead by Beelzebub and Dagon, are all gathered at the doorway, watching in shock.  

“Right,” Dagon seems to come to her senses first, before any of the others, “We’re under new management, then.”

And she takes a knee.  

All of Hell is quick to follow.  

“Here’s what’s going to happen,” Aziraphale says, his voice carrying to all of the corridors of Hell.

Before he can continue though, Crowley turns back into his human corporation, right there on his lap.  

Aziraphale quickly steadies him, to keep him from falling to the ground.  

“Really, Crowley?”

“What?  You look just as powerful with me sprawled over your lap in this form,” he grins, flashing some fang.  

“Lord have mercy…” Aziraphale sighs.

The demon hoard gasps.  

“Listen, everyone,” Aziraphale says, getting back on track, “The War is off.  There will be no more evil for evil’s sake, no more temptations, no more discord and discontent.  Hell, is hereby closed.”

Before the shocked exclamations can even begin to rise from the crowd, a blue light envelopes them all.

Not the solitary spotlight of God’s attention, but a diffuse glow that builds and builds until it’s blinding, until there’s nothing left in all of existence but The Light.

(And God looked upon Her creation, and saw that it was good.)

Crowley and Aziraphale come back to consciousness clinging to each other tightly.  They’re hovering in the clouds, with every angel and demon accounted for behind them.  This is the Heaven Aziraphale remembers from before, just majestic clouds and light and gentle breezes, not the corporate police state the angels turned it into after being left to their own devices for too long…  

“What’s happening?” Crowley whispers, looking around as everyone else looks back at them with the same confusion.  

“Judgement,” Gabriel says, his face determined.  

“Um, not quite.”

Every being looks upward at the source of the voice like they normally would.  Aziraphale’s eyes go wide though, and he forcibly grabs Crowley’s head and turns it back down, covering him with one of his wings.

“It’s ok, Aziraphale, I’m going to tone it down for you guys.”

It’s not until God has fully descended and Her Majesty has been tucked away enough that She’s no longer glowing, that Aziraphale releases his protective stance over Crowley.  

(Even as angels, very few types of them were made to withstand God’s presence.)

(Archangels were not one of them.)

“Let me just start by saying that I am, so, so glad that you stayed,” God smiles at them kindly, almost proudly.  

Crowley leans over to Aziraphale and whispers, “Is it just me, or does she look exactly like that chick from Star Wars?”

“Star Wars?  What are you-  Crowley, focus,” Aziraphale hisses at him.  

God folds her hands, as if in a mockery of waiting patiently.  

“Oh, uh, were you talking to us?...” Crowley looks around and then winces, pretty much preparing to be smote right there.  

“Were any of the rest of you thinking of running off to the Void?” She asks, giving them a wry smile.  

There’s a murmur through the assembled masses behind them.  

But no one speaks up.  

(No one has a single, solitary clue as to what’s going on.)  

“I wanted to thank you, too,” God says, “For taking care of Lucifer.  I just couldn’t finish things up knowing he’d still be around to terrorize the humans afterward.”

“You’re welcome?” Aziraphale says, incredibly confused.  

“Wait, so this is The End, then?” Crowley asks.  

“For some of us,” She answers.  “Look, I appreciate the sentiment of you taking care of ‘The Enemy’ for me, but, guys, come on.  The opposite of Life, isn’t evil,” She tells them, “Lucifer may have been a pain in the ass, but he wasn’t my other half.  He wasn’t the first one to screw up,” She assures them.  

“I…  I don’t understand…” Aziraphale says.  

“Let’s just say, that when we went through our crucible, we were too afraid to stay…  It, changed us, though…  And we regretted it…” She sighs, her gaze going out past them, out into the distance.  

Crowley turns around, some unknown danger pricking at his senses.  

Behind them, moving slowly but steadily toward the crowd, is Death.

God lifts her arms, making a parting motion in front of her.  The angels and demons are separated like the Red Sea, with Heaven and Hell mixed on both sides.  

Aziraphale tugs on Crowley’s arm, pulling him with him out from in front of God.

“This is not our fight, my dear,” Aziraphale whispers to him.  

Crowley steals a look at God’s face.  

She doesn’t look determined or angry or even riled up.  She looks sad.

“Are you sure this is going to be a fight?” Crowley asks him, asks Her, asks for anyone who’s listening.

“It's ok,” God assures them all, “I wasn’t sure if it would be this way or not, you know, with free will involved and all, but I’m glad it is.  I’m glad we get a chance to fix our mistake.  You all know enough now to hold on to your existences yourselves, without my help.  My Son will shield the humans, but the rest of you are kind of going to be on your own,” She adds, like She really does regret that, but there’s nothing to be done for it.  

As Death approaches, the group of angels and demons closes up behind him, silently and unanimously, as if by a higher power’s will.  

“Oh my God, you’re just going to let him?...” Crowley blurts, cringing at how it comes out halfway through.  He pushes on though.  “If you’re just going to abandon us, then what was the point?”

God takes her gaze off the approaching finality and addresses Crowley with glowing, starlit eyes.  

“The point was, to teach you that dichotomy is a trap.  Don’t fall into it,” She says, turning to look back at Death, “Or you’ll end up just like us...”

Death stops in front of her, reaching out with his free hand that isn’t occupied with his scythe.  

God reaches up, wrapping her arms around his neck.  

“I’m so tired,” She whispers, tears starting to fill Her eyes.  

“I know,” Death whispers back.  

And then he runs her through.  

Thousands of angels and demons cry out in sadness, cry out in agony at the loss of Her Grace, all at once.  

Death holds God as She dissolves into a million points of light in his arms.  

(Who judges, when God is created?)

(Who judges, when God is killed?)  

(Who is created, by good existing?)

(Why?)

After She is gone, Death drops his scythe.  

He tips his face upward.  

He dissolves into a million points of darkness.

And the Heavens shake.

“Uh, we need to get out of here,” Gabriel says, panicking.  

“It’s too late for that,” Crowley overrides him, “Everyone!  Form up!” he yells, waving his arms just a touch desperately.

“Yes, quickly now, stay together!” Aziraphale adds, shedding his human form as existence starts to tremble around them.  

Everyone copies him, wings and eyes and claws and eyes everywhere as they huddle together, angels and demons, creations of God and abandoned of God, all together, all at once.

The Seraphim and Cherubim form a protective circle around the rest of them as the lesser start screaming, feeling their selves being eroded away.  Those protecting turn up their power, as high as they can, willing with every miraculous allotment ever given them, for it to be ok.

Aziraphale’s fire-red wings are the only point of color on the outer circle of white.

Crowley slips inside his wings, the sacred ones used to cover himself, and he presses their lips together, one last time.  

The Void beckons.  

(At the center of a black hole is love.)

Nothingness begins to creep in between the angels’ wings.  

(At the center of a black hole…)  

Tears flow freely down Crowley’s face as he and Aziraphale kiss and kiss, their atoms sliding in between one another’s, the light of their souls the only thing they can see behind their eyelids.  

(At the center…)

Something wild and desperate at the very core of Crowley clicks.

Wonders.

Questions.

“There’s another option,” he suddenly says, breaking away from Aziraphale’s mouth.

“What?”

Crowley looks around quickly, not leaving the safety of Aziraphale’s arms and wings.

“Gabriel!” he yells, catching his former co-worker’s attention from across the huddled masses, “The Pillars!”

The fear on Gabriel’s face flickers as it competes with dawning comprehension.

“Go!” Crowley waves at him, pointing to the other side of their angelic shield.  

“Crowley, what are you doing?” Aziraphale asks as Crowley turns back to him, sticking his hands through the gap on either side of the Cherub’s shoulders and out into the Void.  

“If this existence is going to insist on unraveling,” Crowley hisses, because fuck, that hurts, “Then we’ll just build a new one.”

And stars explode from his finger tips.  

Crowley leans in and kisses his other half again, and a hundred blue nebulae the exact shade of Aziraphale’s eyes are born in succession.  

(Suns burn.)

(Planets spin.)

(Galaxies twinkle in the sky.)

(The universe is a lot smaller afterward, but at the center of it all, is love.)  

<//>

“What now?” the humans ask.

The Son of Man looks up at the night sky, filled to the brim with new constellations that have never been seen before, never even been dreamed of, and a knowing smile spreads over his face.

“Now we’re free.”

[oviids]

pls share some of your spn fic recs 🥺🥺

ok, a few things first:

followers and mutuals who do not have supernatural brainworms, kindly avert your eyes

i don’t normally rec or even read much fanfic any more but this is a CRISIS ok (cont.)

there is so. much. content for deancas out there and i have incredibly high standards, several ancient ao3 bookmarks, can speedread, and want to spare you guys the experience of wading through it all.

i also have a section for spn femslash since I was pretty into that back in the day (sadly a lot less fan content for this :/)

I don’t really like au’s or pure smut (I honestly usually just skim or skip those scenes) so if you’re mainly looking for that kind of thing this probably won’t be very helpful to you. jsyk.

i’m not great at describing stuff but i’ll do my best, i’ll also try and add tw’s when neccesary.

i wil try and keep updating this with any other decent fics i find, feel free to rec stuff too since i’m like 7 years behind.(edit 1/25/21) this is getting looooong so i’m going to start making another list on my spn blog rather than update this one

(edit 1/3/21) since this has gotten pretty long i’ve added rating/approximate word counts and marked my particular favorites with an asterisk.

Dean/Cas fic:

So Says The Sword*** - explicit/85k. FUCK its good...au/time travel where dean is not pulled out of hell by cas and says yes to becoming the michael sword. honestly could serve as an alternative to actually watching the show, if you want to get into dean/cas without actually doing that to yourself.

Fata morgana.*  - teen/6k, pst s9 finale. very bela centric and i love it, she finds cas looking for dean in hell.

Redemption Road -misc/600+k. an incredibly long fic from a collaborative writing group back in the day. canon divergent from the end of s6 on, has a cool take on godstiel and the leviathans, as well as the lovecratian mythos connection. ngl when i reread it i only made it about 28% in but imo the casual reader can actually stop around there, the rest concerns a lovecraftian apocalypse that is still good (i think i don’t remember it very well) but not required to enjoy the first half. if you prefer i have an ebook version i can send you on gdrive.

Someone Who's Feeling For Me* - mature/45k, s12. they run into lisa braeden and dean thinks cas is into her while cas thinks dean still likes her. treats lisa way better than the show ever did and the miscommunication is pretty funny rather than annoying.

a turn of the earth - mature/95k. time travel fic where cas from s10 keeps showing up in deans life from a few years before s1 to right before the hellhounds take his soul.  slow burn, good character study, and at one point cas punches the dad in the face and it rules.

On the Wings of War - teen/85k, canon divergent s5. dean accidentally becomes the Horseman of War. plays fun, fast and loose with biblical lore, michael has some rights.

Named - mature/95k, alternate s5. EXTREMELY blasphemous in a fun sexy way. manages to predict metatron almost to a T. there’s one major character death and its literally jesus christ, everyone is very sad about it and it sets the rest of the story rolling. an alternate interpretation of cas’ mission to raise dean from hell which had me on the floor. ngl its kind of misogynistic at points, but its from 2010 and tracks with late oughts-2010 spn (sorry anna the author did you dirty here:/).

The Girlfriend Experience - explicit/15k. uhhh i don’t normally rec or even read smutty stuff unless someone i know is specifically asking for it but this has stuff like sam trying to be a good ally and dean thinking holding hands with cas is ‘kinda gay :/’ minutes after having gay sex with him.

i crippled your heart a hundred times - explicit/19k, s8. cas confesses his feelings and dean spends a long time getting his head out of his ass about it. truly hits different after the actual confession, despite being written six years early it feels like its actually what could have gone down more or less if the writers weren’t talentless demons who hate us.

My Roots Take Flight** - mature/125k. reverse au where cas is a hunter and dean’s an angel...OR IS IT???? an alternate retelling of s4. tw for briefly being set in a psychiatric hospital/the hospital being mentioned somewhat frequently throughout the fic, plus more references to torture in hell and heaven than usual.

The One Thing You Can't Lose* - teen/4k.you know those posts about how cas is a super-strong super-tough ancient warrior but he just lets dean tug him around because he likes it? thats it thats the fic.

Hands, From Which All Things Are Built - teen/14k, post s8′s ‘goodbye stranger.’ cas is on the run with the angel tablet but keeps in touch with sam and dean by text, he and dean still manage to be terrible at Actual communication.

Autrement, Danger - or, The Account of an Exceedingly Long Day - mature/30k, post s11. a monster that takes the appearance of your soulmate leads to some wild miscommunications and dealing with years of repression, also dean gets to see cas’ true form which is always cool. tw for non-graphic mentions of underage sexual assault/sex work.

Down to Agincourt - mature/explicit/900++++k, endverse continuation. endverse!cas survives his encounter with lucifer and discovers another time-displaced dean from s7. i’ve only read the two of four parts but its really good, veeeeery slow burn, has a lot of fun oc’s and takes a rather surprising but (imo) entertaining and intriguing turn into Hellenic history and mythology. usual tw’s for endverse/endverse!cas but nothing graphic, it’s actually pretty light-hearted (relatively speaking of course).

Nothing Equals the Splendor** - explicit/8k, THEE finale fix it fic you’ve been waiting for! posits that the entire final episode was just a (very bad and lame) djinn’s vision.

like moses and batman and james dean - explicit/31k, post s8. explores dean’s trauma and internalized homophoba from his technically canon experience with sex work and its impact on his relationship with cas. the sex work itself isn’t really shown in any detail but it’s still a relatively heavy fic.

Crazy Diamonds - explicit/25k, s4/alternate s14. fresh-out-of-hell dean and dean from 10 years in the future are displaced from time and sent to each other’s present.

where the weeds take root - explicit/30k. au where the men of letters kick them out of the bunker and they accidentally move out into the country, get over their codependence and semi retire. featuring chicken coop building, sam volunteering at a dog shelter, gardening, and blissfully mundane domesticity.

No Resting Place - teen/6k. djinn dream fic, switches back and forth between cas’ dream of being married to dean and retired from hunting to the aftermath when he wakes up. tw for brief mention of suicide since, y’know, djinn dream.

any port in a storm - mature/52k. post s8 finale. cas and dean have to pose as a couple going through a rough patch for a case and actually deal with their emotional baggage, cas struggles with being human and metatron is up to stuff.

all this and heaven too* - explicit/7k. in the author’s own words ‘...a love letter to every trans person who ever projected onto Dean Winchester.’ absolutely unzipped me emotionally and theologically, its just. so good. tw for very brief mentions of internalized transphobia/dysphoria.

Because it is* - mature/6k, finale fix it. killing chuck does not bring back anyone back and the winchesters spend a very long time dealing with what they’ve lost, cas and dean SOMEHOW still manage to have signifigant communication issues even after the confession. tw for suicidal thoughts/brief attempt.

Vena Amoris and Other Old-Fashioned Bullshit* - teen/4k, s6. when cas fell for dean it automatically soulbonded/angel married them, shenanigans ensue when dean finds out during the angel’s civil war. funny and actually written back when s6 was airing so cas is still (or at least pretending to be) kind of an OP asshole which is fun.

Rinse, Repeat - teen/3k, s8. angsty character study of cas as he’s reprogrammed and trained to kill dean. not really dean/cas since its just cas’ pov of canon events but its beautifully written and ends with him snapping out of it through the power of love (also now a canon event!).

Emergence - explicit/59k, canon divergent after s11. dean meets a hunter he only recognizes as their friend claire novak’s missing father, but soon realizes he might be the answer behind the mysterious void in his memories and feelings (aka everyone’s memories of cas are completely wiped away for three years).

Cuckoo And Nest - explicit/10k, early established relationship/character study, cas tries to figure out how he fits into dean’s life and space in the bunker.

Build a Home* - teen/20k, canon divergent s12. sam and eileen are cute and turn the bunker into men of letters/hunters hq and everyone but cas moves in, mutual miscommunication issues and pining ensues.

Down in the River - teen/5k, early s8, cas prays to dean in purgatory while sam and dean try to figure out a way to get him out.

Teaching Poetry to Fish* - mature/52k, ?? BC through the entire series/canon divergent s14 and 15. retelling of crucial scenes throughout the shows timeline from cas’ pov, feat. actual fish and poetry.

the minor fall, the major lift - gen/4k, post confession/finale fixit. dean goes into the empty to save cas and runs into several old friends (and enemies).

With the Kisses of His Mouth* - teen/3k, gen later seasons. dean and cas keep kissing by accident.

Remaining Grace - explicit/109k, alternate s6. au where cas asks dean for help with raphael and dean, of course, does. tw for temporary major character death/semi-graphic depictions of alcohol withdrawal.

The face of heaven.* - teen/10k, au, dean is a regular guy and cas is a fallen star (think ‘stardust’, kinda).

Stories Are Made of Mistakes*  - teen/5k. newly human cas has trouble getting used to a human body and humanity in general, but still figures out that he and dean are A Thing before dean does.

Hurry Up And Wait - mature/21k, canon divergent s12. a fairyland and quite possibly LOTR related case comes up and dean goes full fanboy, mary is introduced to the wonders of the peter jackson adaptions, many references and comparisons (including between cas and dean’s ‘friendship’ and arwen/aragon). also charle is still alive and has just been doing fairy stuff this whole time.

There Are Many Things - explicit/28k, s9. cas is extremely lonely/touch-starved and trying to figure out this whole human thing, as well as where he and dean stand after being kicked out of the bunker.

It's A Long Life to Always Be Longing - teen/40k, post s11 finale. amara helps dean by putting him in a magical coma so he can finally get some much needed rest and show him possible futures for him, sam and cas. meanwhile sam and cas go on a roadtrip (or several) to find componets for a spell to wake dean up. really good sam and cas friendship, they actually talk about their shared lucifer trauma and stuff.

Non-Photo Blue - gen/2k, s4/5/alternate s5. fifty moments from cas’ memories of dean.

Tall Grass - explicit/57k, canon divergent post series. cas becomes the ultimate plant dad. feat the wayward sisters gang, cathartic character growth, fun oc’s, domesticity, and lots of actual botanical info-dumping.

on vessels - no rating/gen/2k. established dean/cas, cas tells dean about how he used to imagine what it would be like to have him as his vessel.

search for tomorrow on every shore* - teen/11k, post-finale (extremely derogatory). some angels in jack’s new heaven act out and dean gets temporarily resurrected in 2003 and runs into his younger self.

Architecture of the Minotaur’s Heart - explicit/45k, very canon divergent post s1. dean’s new house seems to have a life and mind of its own, while in his dreams he sees glimpses of a world and apocalypse that never came to be and an angel that looks strangely like his mysterious neighbor, cas. loosely inspired by the book house of leaves (which i highly recommend for fans of weird horror).

The Distance Of The Setting Sun - explicit/17k, post s5. established dean/cas relationship, team free will finally takes advantage of cas’ abilities to go on vacation around the world.

diamond star halo - teen/5k, s11. dean lets cas use him as a temporary vessel while he recovers from rowena’s spell, sam is a long-suffering third-wheel.

Make Known** - teen/16k, s6/7. dean struggles to understand how cas could have become his enemy and whether he ever truly knew him in the first place.

blunt little instrument* - mature/1.4k, post finale. dean finally confronts his father in heaven, very cathartic.

my heart a compass*** - teen/10k, post confession. the empty forces cas to re-experience his most regretted moments while dean tries to snap him out of it and bring him home.

A Crash Course in Someone Else's History - teen/11k, s6. cas from the very start of s4 is brought forward in time by s6!cas to distract the brothers from his and crowley’s plans.

The Cuckoo Father - mature/8k, s7 au. the woman who found cas in the river post-leviathans does not marry him bc he was sent to her by god or whatever, but actually identifies him as jimmy novak and sends him back to claire and amelia.

The Dead Dean Clause* - teen/5k, post alt s5 ending. team free will celebrates surviving taking down lucifer by getting blitzed, cas lies to a cop and gets an impromptu driving lesson. title/description sound dark i know but it’s actually very funny and light.

Suck It, Judy Garland - mature/20k, s12 (after the ‘i love you...i love all of you’ episode). cas and sam have to pretend to be a couple for a case and dean is NOT happy about it.

By Daylight and In Dream - teen/16k, s5. pre-dean/cas, dean invites cas to use his dreams to hide from the other angels. tw for very brief mention of a memory/dream of alastair sexually assaulting dean.

The Five People You Meet in Heaven - mature/22k, post-canon. an actually happy (if sometimes bittersweet) heaven endgame written several years ago, though some details are rather eerily similar to the show’s ending.

heaven is a place on earth* - teen/2k. dean’s pov of some of the times cas left him behind throughout the show, and one alternate ending where he finally gets to stay.

I Cleanse The Mirror - teen/20k, alternate s6. dean’s body is stolen by an ancient elemental and his soul has to hitch a ride in cas’ vessel.

an exploration of gender; angelic*** - mature/4k. *oscar isaac voice* lets get into angel gender politics!! aka cas is trans.

Zenith - explicit/33k, s9. after 9x06 an angry witch curses cas with the ability to see supernatural beings and human souls.

La cucina. - gen/3k, alt s9. dean goes wild helping a newly-human cas find out what kinds of food he likes, or the early s9 domesticity we deserved!

Dean Winchester, Cocksucker at Rest***** - teen/7k, post-finale. john and mary finally come over for dinner and john reacts to dean/cas in a rather predictable fashion. SOOOOOOOOO good omg, its so funny and a little sad and very very cathartic. part of a series that has a few other really good short fics.

The Way You Didn't Go - teen/5k, s15. coda to 15.09, dean has nightmares about the moc!cas timeline.

On Drowning - teen/28k. dean saves cas after he nearly drowns, they both try and deal with the physical/mental fallout (aka the fic where thee iconic “you only touch me when you think I’m dead or dying” originates). tw for realistic depictions of drowning/triage/misc medical information.

The Thirty-Six Questions That Lead to Love* - mature/13k. claire has dean and cas pretend to be her gay dads for a case and they play the titular 36 question game, get mistaken for swingers, and birdwatch, among other things.

Assorted F/F stuff:

Deep Breaths* - mary/ellen, au where mary said no to azazel’s deal and let john stay dead, still becomes a milf.

Like Rebel Diamonds - krissy/claire, they become hunter gf’s on the hunt for cas to kick his ass for taking jimmy. not-so-stealth dean/cas as well.

To Ash and Bone - anna/ruby, same author as the previous fic (p much all of her stuff is good from what i recall). au where ruby is a witch and helps anna when she’s cursed.

Holy Clockwork Angels - jo/ruby, STEAMPUNK au with very cool worldbuiilding.

At Day's End - jo/anna (my fucking KINGDOM for more jo/anna content, the dean/cas parallels are allllll there), au where they are both at the camp in the endverse and gfs.

these posts - ok so not actually a fic but i’m now obsessed with this hannah/meg dynamic.

Tagelied - mary/ellen, the true story of how ellen got into hunting before angels interfered.

Hell's Bells** - meg/abaddon, alternate s8/9 where meg survives crowley’s attack with sam’s help and teams up with abaddon (who she has a sk year old crush on) to take back hell.

The Ecstasy of the Rose - anna/ruby, anna travels back in time to escape heaven and becomes a signifigant part of ruby’s old human life.

Angel Underground - anna/jo, kind of an urban fantasy au with a very intriguing premise (sadly its very short, i’d love to see more if this ‘verse).

Clover, Flame - billie/mary, billie was always the reaper that showed up to take mary after her death(s) over the years.

Drag Me To Heaven - anna/ruby, a variant on the ‘last night on earth’ thing with dean.

Come Home* - jo/anna, canon-divergent au where anna is the new waitress at the roadhouse and helps jo set up a (probably not really) haunted house for halloween.

[beanie-beebo-writes]

Highway To Hell

Series Summary: An all-too-real nightmare and a missing brother sends Dean, Bobby, and Cas on a frantic search. All the while, what may be a bad dream leads to a probable jump-start to Dean's true worst nightmare, Sam jump-starting the end of the world. Set in season 4; consider this a parallel canonverse fic

Previous chapter, Masterlist

Chapter 4

The drive was silent, which was expected. Knowing that made the atmosphere less awkward, but tension still remained on the surface. Castiel rode along with Dean in the Impala, deciding it would benefit more to keep the older brother company. Bobby lead the way in his pickup, to keep one of his good vehicles handy.

Cas would have offered to turn on the radio, but Dean seemed to be in deep thought, and he didn't want to disturb him. From what he had learned from being around the Winchesters, when Dean was distraught, you left him alone. Unless if he specifically asked for help, which was a rare occurrence. Especially if family was at stake, Dean was at a fragile state; he should only be pushed when necessary. And now was not necessary, so Cas settled on watching the passing scenery outside his window.

"We will find your brother, Dean." Cas reassured.

"And what makes you so sure?" Dean asked.

"Because he left on his own, and he's Sam Winchester." Cas said.

Dean stared back at the road, contemplating the angel's response.

"I hope you're right." He said.

                                                ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Since the gas pedal was basically floored, they arrived to Ilchester within no time. After quickly settling into a random motel, they head straight into town. The clock in the car wasn't much use, but the sun told them it was close to noon by the time they pulled up into city parking. All three of them got out of their vehicles and met at the space between their cars.

"Alright, so I figure we split up, to cover more ground." Bobby suggested.

"I like that idea, let's go." Dean said, starting to walk away.

"Not so fast, boy!" Bobby exclaimed with annoyance. "We need to set up some plans first."

"Well, I say screw a plan, and find Sam." Dean said.

"We can't find your brother faster without a plan, and you know that. Use your brain Dean; remember, treat it like a usual case." Bobby replied.

"But this isn't a usual case, Bobby!" He said.

"I agree with Bobby," Cas said, "Sam is a subject, and we are searching for him. As you would with any other victim or monster."

Dean inhaled, trying to conjure up a way to argue back with this statement. But he couldn't, they were right.

"Before you can begin to argue, you're sticking with me this time around." The older hunter added.

Dean grumbled in annoyance. "So how are we exactly going about this?" Cas asked.

"Do you have a phone, Cas?" Bobby asked.

"No, I don't own one. I never really saw a use for acquiring one." Cas replied.

"Alright, well you can use mine." Bobby said, handing the angel his cell phone. "I think the best way to go about this, is to show them a picture of Sam. We have the resources, we might as well use them to our advantage."

Cas examined the cell phone with curiosity, as if he was from Mars. Dean rolled his eyes and waited impatiently.

"Dean, you have a photo of Sam, right?" Bobby asked after pulling up Sam's picture on his phone.

"What? Oh, yeah, I have a couple." Dean said.

"Recent?"

"Pretty recent. Plus, his looks haven't changed that much in a few years."

"Point taken. Alright, all set guys?"

"Yes." Dean and Cas said in unison.

"Good. Dean and I will take this way, Cas, you take that way. All you have to ask is if they have seen Sam, and show them the picture on that phone. Capiche?" Bobby explained.

"I don't understand." Cas said.

"What don't you understand?" Dean fumed.

"Capiche." Cas answered.

Dean rolled his eyes; Bobby glared at the elder Winchester.

"I just asked if you understand, and if everything is good. That's capiche." Bobby said.

"Oh, then I capiche." Cas said.

"Can we go now?!" Dean asked.

                                                  ~~~~~~~~~~~~

"You need to screw your head back on, and get it out of your ass!" Bobby shouted quietly.

"I think I'm fine." Dean said.

"No Dean, you're not. Whenever you're without your brother, you spiral. I've raised you long enough to know that." Bobby replied. "Now focus, will you?"

"I am focusing!" Dean said.

"Well focus harder." Bobby said.

The two hunters first stopped at a concession stand, knowing the worker had likely seen all of the action. To their benefit, they had a few moments before lunch came around.

"Excuse me," Dean started, "Hi, we're agents Tolson and Hoover with Missing Persons. Have you seen this man around?"

Dean pulled out his phone, which was already on a photo of him and his brother, trying out their fathers' sawed off shotguns a couple years back. The concession worker studied the photo briefly, but intently.

"Not sure, but the face looks familiar." He said.

Bobby slid the man thirty dollars with a gleam in his eye. "Are you sure?"

"Well, now that you mention it, I did see him. He was a little out of it; he seemed like he was out for something. From what I could tell, that something was drugs." He said.

"Do you know where he was headed?" Dean asked.

"No, but he was actually going towards a store down the corner, he asked for directions. It's a small shop called 'Loretta's Spice Garden', you shouldn't miss it." The concession worker said.

"You're a big help, thank you." Bobby said as the two of them walked briskly towards the small shop.

                                                  ~~~~~~~~~~~~

Cas awkwardly wandered around the slightly busy town square. There were so many people he could ask for information, but they all looked like they were in too much of a hurry. He couldn't help but wonder how the other hunters did it, no one remotely seemed to care enough to give him even a few seconds. His eyes finally settled upon a woman lounging on a nearby park bench; he strided over to her with a spark of confidence.

"Hello, um, I lost a friend of mine, have you seen him?" Cas asked as he sat down.

She looked quickly at the picture and then focused her gaze on him.

"Well, that depends." She purred.

"What do you mean? It's a yes or no question.." Cas said.

"If you're willing to pay, maybe I'll tell you." She replied with a wink.

"Well, I don't actually have any money on me right now, but I could-"

"No silly, I meant a little personal time, in the bedroom."

"I guess I could accommodate that, when I'm free sometime."

"How about within the next seven hours, what do ya say, handsome?"

Cas blushed as the woman began to play with his loose trench coat ties.

"Um, sure, I could always stop in tonight."

The woman pinched his cheek and smiled seductively, handing him a slip of paper with a series of numbers written upon it. "I'll be seeing you later then."

As the lady walked away, Cas realized he had never felt so confused and heated at the same time.

                                                     ~~~~~~~~~~~

A bell above the door chimed as Dean and Bobby walked into the comfortably small store. They were greeted by a plump woman at the counter, who just put down a book on mythological creatures.

"Hi, welcome! How can I help you fine gentlemen?" She asked.

"Let me guess, Loretta?" Dean asked confidently.

"No, actually. Loretta was my mother's name; I'm Lanie." She said.

"Alright Lanie, we have a couple questions for you. We're agents Laurel and Hardy with Missing Persons. Have you seen this man around, recently?" Dean asked, pulling out his phone from his jacket.

Lanie put on a pair of cat-eye shaped glasses and peered at the picture of the two of them. Recognition instantly filled her face.

"Oh yes, he was here yesterday. He didn't look too well." She said.

"Did he buy or take anything?" Bobby asked.

"Well, he did buy a few herbs and some candles. I could pull up the inventory, if you want to know the exact items he purchased." Lanie said.

"That would be great if you could do that, please." Dean said.

As the lady walked over to her old monitor, the two hunters glanced at each other questionably. They leaned over the counter as she searched her recent inventory.

"From what I can gather, he purchased four red candles, a small bag of Ambergris, Frankincense, and Benzoin." She said.

"And you're positive that's what he bought?" Bobby asked.

"Yes, since I mark each time I count inventory. And I don't get a large amount of customers daily, so it's normally easy to pinpoint who buys what." She explained.

"Did he happen to tell you where he might be going?" Dean asked.

"No, sadly, but wherever he was headed, he sure made a haste to get there."

Dean's demeanor changed so instantly, Lanie was about to ask if he was alright. Dean anxiously eyed Bobby and nudged his foot.

"Thank you for your time, it really means a lot." Bobby said as they began to head out.

"No problem, I hope you find the guy you're looking for!" She called out with a warm smile.

At that point, Dean practically rushed out of the store block until Bobby pulled him to a halt.

"Dean, wait," He said when he caught Dean's attention, "where do you think you're going?"

"Bobby, whatever he bought, it didn't sound like ingredients for baking a cake."

"I get that, but we have to stay together. This could be dangerous."

"It's Sam-"

"As far as we know, we know it's Sam. For all we know, he's.."

Dean clenched his jaw and inched closer to the older hunter.

"Don't."

Bobby nodded, looking at the older Winchester with a hint of sympathy behind his eyes.

"I don't care what it takes, we will find your brother." Bobby assured.

Dean broke eye contact before tears could cloud his vision; the thought of losing his brother again, he couldn't process it. Where could he even turn? He could only hope Bobby knew what to do. Right on cue, Cas began to approach from farther up the sidewalk, hopefully serving as a brief distraction to the current situation.

"Hey Cas, find anything?" Dean asked when the angel was close enough to mumble.

"Well, I think I might have. A nice young woman offered to spare me some details later on. I tried to ask around, but everyone was too busy." Cas explained.

"Later on? Cas, you know we need details now, right?" Dean said.

"I know, but she did seem quite sincere." He replied.

"It only takes a couple seconds to answer a few questions, ya idjit." Bobby said.

"Yeah, I know. That's why I'm confused." Cas said.

A small smile crept onto Dean's face. "Wait, Cas, did she say why she wanted to meet you later?"

"Yes. In fact, she said I had to spend some personal time in the bedroom with her, which I found rather peculiar.."

Dean stifled a laugh that began to arise in his throat as Bobby rubbed his forehead awkwardly.

"Son, I believe you were just played."

"I'm sorry?"

"What Bobby is trying to say, is that she wanted some… um.. personal body on body action, from you. She probably has nothing that could help us at the moment."

"Wait, do you mean… intercourse?"

Dean sighed and deadpanned at the angel. "Did you really have to let the whole world hear it?"

"Well, I.."

"Never mind, we'll talk back at the car."

[thunderoad]

Hi , So listened to the album and holy shit🔥 he really came through with those vocals in each song . Would you be doing a song by song review of the album .? Interested in listening what you think .

he SOO DID!! i had been awake way too long yesterday and was just in disbelief over how good it is, but i had it on in the car while i was running errands today, and wow!! thank u sm for asking, here’s my track by track: 

1. heartbreak weather - i rmr texting my friend last night that it was so dancey, which i stand by!! it’s begging to be screamed and jumped along to in the best possible way. i think it’s a perfect introduction to the album as a whole, too; you have the sad undercurrent in the chorus of, ‘all of my life, it was heartbreak weather’ (which is SO sad when u think about it), tempered by the upbeat, uptempo sound. and i love the way that it sets the stage for the rest of the album by invoking the imagery of not just weather but this lonely city, which he really continues to inhabit for the rest of the album! 

2. black and white - perfect wedding song. you can just picture the glee kids covering it while the wedding party dances down the aisle, which is a compliment - you want these moments to be happy! i love how it retains the hopefulness and simplicity of youth in a way that’s hard to capture sometimes without quite becoming schlocky. ‘it’s the way you love, i’ve got to give it back to you’ is all the more startling for how prescient it is in that context! he’s got some GREAT turns of phrase on this album

3. dear patience - when this one started, i was prepared to dislike it because niall’s ballads tend to not quite be to my taste, but then he has that line about how ‘just me and the stars can get lonely,’ which is the BEST subtle tilt of the head to niall’s particular position as a celebrity, you know? it may not have been written with that interpretation in mind, but it’s got a particular achiness that i love. and the vocal duplication or echo that kicks in on the chorus combined with the bridge’s driving rhythm and that spiraling, hopeless cry - oh, it’s excellent. not to mention the strings are gonna KILL live

4. bend the rules - when he started singing in this one, i literally had to stop and wait for dani to catch up to me: that is a bruce impression if ever i’ve heard one! this one feels a bit more like a concept song than the others, like he’s still sort of trying to dial in on what he’s getting at with this very specific feeling of jealousy and mistrust and the fear of vulnerability it invokes. if he plays it live, i think it’ll become quite the showstopper. it’s hugely appealing to the part of me that loves and loves story songs

5. small talk - i lOVE this trend stranger things started of those highly distorted synths generating this sense of unease (’i’m paralyzed’), and how the song slowly unfolds into a foot-stomping barnburner of a song! i used to have this thing about hating when great singers talk-sing because it’s such a waste of talent, and i still do, but the sheer FUN of singing this song back to him at niall’s concerts like a bunch of horny witches casting a spell is going to be SO GREAT. i know it’s ‘slow hands’ big sister, but this song also has some of ‘on the loose’s’ tremendous punch as a vignette. this song would’ve made an amazing single; i can’t wait to sing it in the car

6. nice to meet ya - this is where, to me, the overarching storyline in the track listing really gains ground and gets going! it stands in such an excellent contrast to ‘small talk,’ too, where both are sort of hookup songs, but where ‘small talk’ is about that tete a tete, ntmy is starting to touch on that idea of conceptualizing and mythologizing someone the way you do at first blush. 

7. put a little love on me - my sincerest apologies to niall, but easily my least fav track on the album. his ballads just aren’t my favorite thing! it is a massive step up from ‘flicker’ to me, though, i love the way it dials in on that peculiar moment where the relationship’s over but you’re not so separated that you can’t still imagine what the other person might be doing, and what exactly do you do with all that knowing someone? it is awfully hard to let go. this song strikes me as a really terrific retrospective even as you start to move forward

8. arms of a stranger - not one of my favorites, tbh! i think it’s lyrical ground we’ve already kind of covered and it’s not the most innovative of his musical arrangements, but i still would not go so far as to call it bad. i do love that instead of accusing the other person of moving on too fast, he turns it on himself; ‘now i’m lying in the arms of a stranger.’ 

9. everywhere - i thought this song was gonna be one thing based on the first few seconds, and then it turns on its heel and becomes something quite different, with more of that chanting + slap-kick percussion. it reminds me forcefully of taylor swift’s ‘holy ground,’ which can only ever be a compliment! i love how he’s using different vocal modes in this album to capture different moods; he’s got that almost monotonous chanting to explain the motionless and airlinessness he’s feeling, and it works! he’s definitely gonna want to play this one acoustic at some point

10. cross your mind - the return of his bruce voice!! i love the imagery of immersing yourself in the world of your relationship with someone else. the driving vocals and drums are such a great underline to the lyrics, like he’s trying to provoke someone, finally ready to hear the truth. he’s definitely put a lot of work into his lyric-writing, too, u know? these songs are on the whole just so much wordier than the last album, which is a huge compliment to how far he’s come! i think there’s a really cool bit of both courage and self-destruction in that ‘don’t hold back’ refrain; those things do keep close company sometimes! and his falsetto in this one is just absolutely perfectly placed in my opinion

11. new angel - i lOVE this one in counterpoint to cross your mind - needing someone else ‘to save me from myself’ is a great emotional tether to draw on them between them, and u know, i do think it risks putting a new relationship on a pedestal, but i think the emphasis is more on admitting fault and vulnerability, neither of which is easy! it’s a deceptively complicated song. not to mention jake is gonna fuck up those guitar bits when the fellas play it live!! 

12. no judgement - fun and funky easy listening gold. as singles go, i think ntmy is a little punchier, but i love the lyrics, and i think the offer of absolution is very sweet, very generous. 

13. san francisco - i LOVE this song. in fact, it might be my favorite! i just love the way the ‘take me back, take me back’ refrain works in two ways: take me back to the past, and as a plea to be taken back by someone else! it’s got everything you need for a perfect love song: imperfection (’wish i hadn’t been so cruel’), romanticism (’what we had would never last, but i can’t let go’), the dramatic rainy love confession that doubles as the goal of all stories, which is self-knowledge (’i’m done running from the one that i want so bad’), all nestled in an inexorable groove. 

14. still - sometimes i love the sound of fingertips dragging over guitar strings and sometimes i hate it, and in this case, i lOVE it; it just wonderfully mimics the sound of pen dragging across paper, which is what i think this is, a bit - a goodbye letter. there’s this john donne line about ‘gold to airy thinness beat,’ which is the first and only thing i could think of when i heard how niall chose to sing this one, just on the edge of untenably high and hurting down to the bone. vulnerability is hard to capture and it’s hard to be honest on a pop record, but i think niall manages both beautifully. 

[aion-rsa]

Top New YA Books in December 2020

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The YA genre is still booming, providing romance, adventure, and more for teens and adults alike. Here are some of the YA books from November 2020 we’re most looking forward to…

Top New Young Adult Books December 2020

The Cousins by Karen M. McManus

Type: Novel Publisher: Delacorte Press Release date: Dec. 1

Den of Geek says: A tale of family and suspense, this novel about uncovering a bloody secret looks like it’s full of atmosphere and a tinge of horror.

Publisher’s summary: Milly, Aubrey, and Jonah Story are cousins, but they barely know each another, and they’ve never even met their grandmother. Rich and reclusive, she disinherited their parents before they were born. So when they each receive a letter inviting them to work at her island resort for the summer, they’re surprised . . . and curious.

Their parents are all clear on one point–not going is not an option. This could be the opportunity to get back into Grandmother’s good graces. But when the cousins arrive on the island, it’s immediately clear that she has different plans for them. And the longer they stay, the more they realize how mysterious–and dark–their family’s past is.

The entire Story family has secrets. Whatever pulled them apart years ago isn’t over–and this summer, the cousins will learn everything.

Buy The Cousins by Karen M. McManus.

A Universe of Wishes by Dhonielle Clayton

Type: Short story collection Publisher: Crown Books for Young Readers Release date: Dec. 8 Den of Geek says: Some of the SF/F genre’s best authors (not to mention YA’s best authors) come together in a collection of fantasy from the We Need Diverse Books initiative. Publisher’s summary: From We Need Diverse Books, the organization behind Flying Lessons & Other Stories, comes a young adult fantasy short story collection featuring some of the best own-voices children’s authors, including New York Times bestselling authors Libba Bray (The Diviners), V. E. Schwab (A Darker Shade of Magic), Natalie C. Parker (Seafire), and many more. Edited by Dhonielle Clayton (The Belles).

In the fourth collaboration with We Need Diverse Books, fifteen award-winning and celebrated diverse authors deliver stories about a princess without need of a prince, a monster long misunderstood, memories that vanish with a spell, and voices that refuse to stay silent in the face of injustice. This powerful and inclusive collection contains a universe of wishes for a braver and more beautiful world.

AUTHORS INCLUDE: Samira Ahmed, Jenni Balch, Libba Bray, Dhonielle Clayton, Zoraida Córdova, Tessa Gratton, Kwame Mbalia, Anna-Marie McLemore, Tochi Onyebuchi, Mark Oshiro, Natalie C. Parker, Rebecca Roanhorse, V. E. Schwab, Tara Sim, Nic Stone

Buy A Universe of Wishes by Dhonielle Clayton.

This is How We Fly by Anna Meriano

Type: Novel Publisher: Philomel Books Release date: Dec. 15 Den of Geek says: It wouldn’t be a geek rec list without this grab bag of high school coming-of-age and Quidditch. Whether you’re a current or recovering Harry Potter fan or looking for a unique setting, this might have something for you.

Publisher’s summary: 17-year-old vegan feminist Ellen Lopez-Rourke has one muggy Houston summer left before college. She plans to spend every last moment with her two best friends before they go off to the opposite ends of Texas for school. But when Ellen is grounded for the entire summer by her (sometimes) evil stepmother, all her plans are thrown out the window. 

Determined to do something with her time, Ellen (with the help of BFF Melissa) convinces her parents to let her join the local muggle Quidditch team. An all-gender, full-contact game, Quidditch isn’t quite what Ellen expects. There’s no flying, no magic, just a bunch of scrappy players holding PVC pipe between their legs and throwing dodgeballs. Suddenly Ellen is thrown into the very different world of sports: her life is all practices, training, and running with a group of Harry Potter fans. 

Even as Melissa pulls away to pursue new relationships and their other BFF Xiumiao seems more interested in moving on from high school (and from Ellen), Ellen is steadily finding a place among her teammates. Maybe Quidditch is where she belongs. 

But with her home life and friend troubles quickly spinning out of control–Ellen must fight for the future that she wants, now she’s playing for keeps. 

Buy This is How We Fly by Anna Meriano.

Top New Young Adult Books November 2020

The Way Back by Gavriel Savit

Type: Novel  Publisher: Knopf Books for Young Readers Release date: Nov. 17

Den of Geek says: A shimmering historical fantasy brings its heroes on a journey through worlds of demons and the dead based on Jewish folklore. 

Publisher’s summary: For the Jews of Eastern Europe, demons are everywhere: dancing on the rooftops in the darkness of midnight, congregating in the trees, harrowing the dead, even reaching out to try and steal away the living. 

But the demons have a land of their own: a Far Country peopled with the souls of the transient dead, governed by demonic dukes, barons, and earls. When the Angel of Death comes strolling through the little shtetl of Tupik one night, two young people will be sent spinning off on a journey through the Far Country. There they will make pacts with ancient demons, declare war on Death himself, and maybe– just maybe–find a way to make it back alive. 

Drawing inspiration from the Jewish folk tradition, The Way Back is a dark adventure sure to captivate readers of Neil Gaiman’s The Graveyard Book and Philip Pullman’s The Book of Dust.

Buy The Way Back by Gavriel Savit.

Rebel Sisters

Type: Novel Publisher: Razorbill Release date: Nov. 17

Den of Geek says: Onyebuchi returns to his anime-inspired anti-war series with Afrofuturism in space. 

Publisher’s summary: It’s been five years since the Biafran War ended. Ify is now nineteen and living where she’s always dreamed–the Space Colonies. She is a respected, high-ranking medical officer and has dedicated her life to helping refugees like herself rebuild in the Colonies.

Back in the still devastated Nigeria, Uzo, a young synth, is helping an aid worker, Xifeng, recover images and details of the war held in the technology of destroyed androids. Uzo, Xifeng, and the rest of their team are working to preserve memories of the many lives lost, despite the government’s best efforts to eradicate any signs that the war ever happened.

Though they are working toward common goals of helping those who suffered, Ify and Uzo are worlds apart. But when a mysterious virus breaks out among the children in the Space Colonies, their paths collide. Ify makes it her mission to figure out what’s causing the deadly disease. And doing so means going back to the homeland she thought she’d left behind forever.

Buy Rebel Sisters by Tochi Onyebuchi.

How to Pack for the End of the World by Michelle Falkoff 

Type: Novel Publisher: HarperTeen Release date: Nov. 10

Den of Geek says: This small stakes high school drama nevertheless feels timely for a world in which it seems like another disaster strikes every day. 

Publisher’s summary: If you knew the world was going to end tomorrow, what would you do?

This is the question that haunts Amina as she watches new and horrible stories of discord and crisis flash across the news every day.

But when she starts at prestigious Gardner Academy, Amina finds a group of like-minded peers to join forces with—fast friends who dedicate their year to learning survival skills from each other, before it’s too late. 

Still, as their prepper knowledge multiplies, so do their regular high school problems, from relationship drama to family issues to friend blow-ups. Juggling the two parts of their lives forces Amina to ask another vital question: Is it worth living in the hypothetical future if it’s at the expense of your actual present?

Buy How to Pack for the End of the World by Michelle Falkoff.

Top New Young Adult Books October 2020

Return of the Thief by Megan Whelan Turner 

Type: Novel Publisher: Greenwillow Books Release date: Oct. 6

Den of Geek says: The latest book in this acclaimed, long-running series known for intricate plotting and twists follows the continuing political machinations of Eugenides, the titular thief, in fantasy world-building based loosely on Greek mythology. 

Publisher’s summary: This beloved and award-winning series began with the acclaimed novel The Thief. It and four more stand-alone volumes bring to life a world of epics, myths, and legends, and feature one of the most charismatic and incorrigible characters of fiction, Eugenides the thief. Now more powerful and cunning than ever before, Eugenides must navigate a perilous future in this sweeping conclusion. Perfect for fans of Leigh Bardugo, Marie Lu, Patrick Rothfuss, and Sarah J. Maas.

Neither accepted nor beloved, Eugenides is the uneasy linchpin of a truce on the Lesser Peninsula, where he has risen to be high king of Attolia, Eddis, and Sounis. As the treacherous Baron Erondites schemes anew and a prophecy appears to foretell the death of the king, the ruthless Mede empire prepares to strike.

The New York Times–bestselling Queen’s Thief novels are rich with political machinations, divine intervention, dangerous journeys, battles lost and won, power, passion, and deception. Features a cast list of the characters in the Queen’s Thief novels, as well as two maps—a map of the world of the Queen’s Thief, and a map exclusive to this edition.

Buy Return of the Thief by Megan Whelan Turner on Amazon.

Over the Woodward Wall by A. Deborah Baker (Seanan McGuire) 

Type: Novel Publisher: Tordotcom Release date: Oct. 6

Den of Geek says: An experimental companion to McGuire’s intricate novel Middlegame, Over the Woodward Wall first came to life as a middle grade story that serves as a pop culture touchstone for the characters in that adult novel. It’s also a story by a master in its own right, although how well it holds up outside the companion novel is yet to be determined.

Publisher’s summary: Avery is an exceptional child. Everything he does is precise, from the way he washes his face in the morning, to the way he completes his homework – without complaint, without fuss, without prompt.

Zib is also an exceptional child, because all children are, in their own way. But where everything Avery does and is can be measured, nothing Zib does can possibly be predicted, except for the fact that she can always be relied upon to be unpredictable.

They live on the same street.

They live in different worlds.

On an unplanned detour from home to school one morning, Avery and Zib find themselves climbing over a stone wall into the Up and Under – an impossible land filled with mystery, adventure and the strangest creatures.

And they must find themselves and each other if they are to also find their way out and back to their own lives.

Buy Over the Woodward Wall by A. Deborah Baker on Amazon.

Blazewrath Games by Amparo Ortiz

Type: Novel  Publisher: Page Street Kids Release date: Oct. 6 

Den of Geek says: This sounds like a sports anime with dragons in book form. A compelling mystery as a tour of a fantastical racing league promises action and ambitious characters. 

Publisher’s summary: Lana Torres has always preferred dragons to people. In a few weeks, sixteen countries will compete in the Blazewrath World Cup, a tournament where dragons and their riders fight for glory in a dangerous relay. Lana longs to represent her native Puerto Rico in their first ever World Cup appearance, and when Puerto Rico’s Runner―the only player without a dragon steed―is kicked off the team, she’s given the chance.

But when she discovers that a former Blazewrath superstar has teamed up with the Sire―a legendary dragon who’s cursed into human form―the safety of the Cup is jeopardized. The pair are burning down dragon sanctuaries around the world and refuse to stop unless the Cup gets cancelled. All Lana wanted was to represent her country. Now, to do that, she’ll have to navigate an international conspiracy that’s deadlier than her beloved sport.

Buy Blazewrath Games by Amparo Ortiz on Amazon.

Top New Young Adult Books September 2020

Night Shine by Tessa Gratton 

Type: Novel  Publisher: Margaret K. McElderry Books  Release date: Sept. 8

Den of Geek says: We’re all about crossovers between fantasy and YA here, and this looks like a good stepping stone for a kid who is just about ready to start reading high fantasy. The prose style is slow and deliberate as the author tells a tale of romance, kidnapping, and friendship.

Publisher’s summary: In the vast palace of the empress lives an orphan girl called Nothing. She slips within the shadows of the Court, unseen except by the Great Demon of the palace and her true friend, Prince Kirin, heir to the throne. When Kirin is kidnapped, only Nothing and the prince’s bodyguard suspect that Kirin may have been taken by the Sorceress Who Eats Girls, a powerful woman who has plagued the land for decades. The sorceress has never bothered with boys before, but Nothing has uncovered many secrets in her sixteen years in the palace, including a few about the prince.

As the empress’s army searches fruitlessly, Nothing and the bodyguard set out on a rescue mission, through demon-filled rain forests and past crossroads guarded by spirits. Their journey takes them to the gates of the Fifth Mountain, where the sorceress wields her power. There, Nothing will discover that all magic is a bargain, and she may be more powerful than she ever imagined. But the price the Sorceress demands for Kirin may very well cost Nothing her heart.

Buy Night Shine by Tessa Gratton on Amazon. 

Punching the Air by Ibi Zoboi and Yusef Salaam

Type: Novel in Verse Publisher: Balzer + Bray  Release date: Sept. 1

Den of Geek says: Authors like Tochi Onyebuchi have taken hold of the moment to write political novels about incarceration in the last few years. This mix of poetry and prose adds to that genre with real world experience from prison reform activist Yusef Salaam. Publisher’s summary: The story that I thought 

was my life 

didn’t start on the day 

I was born  

Amal Shahid has always been an artist and a poet. But even in a diverse art school, he’s seen as disruptive and unmotivated by a biased system. Then one fateful night, an altercation in a gentrifying neighborhood escalates into tragedy. “Boys just being boys” turns out to be true only when those boys are white.  

The story that I think 

will be my life  

starts today 

Suddenly, at just sixteen years old, Amal’s bright future is upended: he is convicted of a crime he didn’t commit and sent to prison. Despair and rage almost sink him until he turns to the refuge of his words, his art. This never should have been his story. But can he change it?  

With spellbinding lyricism, award-winning author Ibi Zoboi and prison reform activist Yusef Salaam tell a moving and deeply profound story about how one boy is able to maintain his humanity and fight for the truth, in a system designed to strip him of both.

Buy Punching the Air by Ibi Zoboi and Yusef Salaam on Amazon.

Gold Wings Rising (The Skybound Saga) by Alex London 

Type: Novel Publisher: Farrar, Straus and Giroux  Release date: Sept. 1

Den of Geek says: It’s always nice to see a fantasy series that moves away from the staple creatures, even if I love dragons, and this series replaces them with ghostly birds that give it a horror movie flavor. 

Publisher’s summary: The war on the ground has ended, but the war with the sky has just begun. After the Siege of the Six Villages, the ghost eagles have trapped Uztaris on both sides of the conflict. The villagers and Kartami alike hide in caves, huddled in terror as they await nightly attacks. Kylee aims to plunge her arrows into each and every ghost eagle; in her mind, killing the birds is the only way to unshackle the city’s chains. But Brysen has other plans.

While the humans fly familiar circles around each other, the ghost eagles create schemes far greater and more terrible than either Kylee or Brysen could have imagined. Now, the tug-of-war between love and power begins to fray, threatening bonds of siblinghood and humanity alike.

Buy Gold Wings Rising by Alex London on Amazon.

Top New Young Adult Books August 2020

Don’t Ask Me Where I’m From by Jennifer De Leon 

Type: Novel Publisher: Simon & Schuster Release date: Aug. 18

Den of Geek says: This looks like it could be an incisive and hard-hitting book that speaks to the way American Latinx students experience racism and navigate high school social life. It has gained high praise from authors including Celeste Ng. 

Publisher’s Summary: Liliana Cruz is a hitting a wall—or rather, walls.

There’s the wall her mom has put up ever since Liliana’s dad left—again.

There’s the wall that delineates Liliana’s diverse inner-city Boston neighborhood from Westburg, the wealthy—and white—suburban high school she’s just been accepted into.

And there’s the wall Liliana creates within herself, because to survive at Westburg, she can’t just lighten up, she has to whiten up.

So what if she changes her name? So what if she changes the way she talks? So what if she’s seeing her neighborhood in a different way? But then light is shed on some hard truths: It isn’t that her father doesn’t want to come home—he can’t…and her whole family is in jeopardy. And when racial tensions at school reach a fever pitch, the walls that divide feel insurmountable.

But a wall isn’t always a barrier. It can be a foundation for something better. And Liliana must choose: Use this foundation as a platform to speak her truth, or risk crumbling under its weight.

Buy Don’t Ask Me Where I’m From By Jennifer De Leon on Amazon.

Lobizona by Romina Garber 

Type: Novel  Publisher: Wednesday Books (Macmillan)  Release date: Aug. 4 

Den of Geek says: Described as a Hogwarts-style fantasy world with werewolves, this fantasy doesn’t flinch from the real world effects of ICE and deportation. 

Publisher’s summary: Some people ARE illegal. 

Lobizonas do NOT exist.

Both of these statements are false.

Manuela Azul has been crammed into an existence that feels too small for her. As an undocumented immigrant who’s on the run from her father’s Argentine crime-family, Manu is confined to a small apartment and a small life in Miami, Florida. 

Until Manu’s protective bubble is shattered. 

Her surrogate grandmother is attacked, lifelong lies are exposed, and her mother is arrested by ICE. Without a home, without answers, and finally without shackles, Manu investigates the only clue she has about her past―a mysterious “Z” emblem―which leads her to a secret world buried within our own. A world connected to her dead father and his criminal past. A world straight out of Argentine folklore, where the seventh consecutive daughter is born a bruja and the seventh consecutive son is a lobizón, a werewolf. A world where her unusual eyes allow her to belong. 

As Manu uncovers her own story and traces her real heritage all the way back to a cursed city in Argentina, she learns it’s not just her U.S. residency that’s illegal. . . .it’s her entire existence.

Buy Lobizona by Jennifer De Leon on Amazon.

Elatsoe by Darcie Little Badger 

Type: Novel  Publisher: Levine Querido Release date: Aug. 25 

Den of Geek says: Charming illustrations and a ghost story deeply tied to a family’s history promise a richly textured tale from this Lipan Apache author. 

Publisher’s summary: Imagine an America very similar to our own. It’s got homework, best friends, and pistachio ice cream.

There are some differences. This America been shaped dramatically by the magic, monsters, knowledge, and legends of its peoples, those Indigenous and those not. Some of these forces are charmingly everyday, like the ability to make an orb of light appear or travel across the world through rings of fungi. But other forces are less charming and should never see the light of day.

Elatsoe lives in this slightly stranger America. She can raise the ghosts of dead animals, a skill passed down through generations of her Lipan Apache family. Her beloved cousin has just been murdered, in a town that wants no prying eyes. But she is going to do more than pry. The picture-perfect facade of Willowbee masks gruesome secrets, and she will rely on her wits, skills, and friends to tear off the mask and protect her family.

Darcie Little Badger is an extraordinary debut talent in the world of speculative fiction. We have paired her with her artistic match, illustrator Rovina Cai. This is a book singular in feeling and beauty.

Buy Elatsoe by Darcie Little Badger on Amazon.

The Dark Tide by Alicia Jasinska

Type: Novel Publisher: Sourcebooks Fire  Release date: Aug. 4

Den of Geek says: Described as atmospheric and salt-soaked, this F/F romance might be a good introduction to readers who want to switch from post-apocalyptic YA to dark fantasy. 

Publisher’s summary: A gripping, dark LGBT YA fantasy about two girls who must choose between saving themselves, each other, or their sinking island.

Every year on St. Walpurga’s Eve, Caldella’s Witch Queen lures a boy back to her palace. An innocent life to be sacrificed on the full moon to keep the island city from sinking. 

Lina Kirk is convinced her brother is going to be taken this year. To save him, she enlists the help of Thomas Lin, the boy she secretly loves, and the only person to ever escape from the palace. But they draw the queen’s attention, and Thomas is chosen as the sacrifice. 

Queen Eva watched her sister die to save the boy she loved. Now as queen, she won’t make the same mistake. She’s willing to sacrifice anyone if it means saving herself and her city.

When Lina offers herself to the queen in exchange for Thomas’s freedom, the two girls await the full moon together. But Lina is not at all what Eva expected, and the queen is nothing like Lina envisioned. Against their will, they find themselves falling for each other as water floods Caldella’s streets and the dark tide demands its sacrifice.

Buy The Dark Tide by Alicia Jasinska on Amazon.

Top New Young Adult Books In July 2020

Feathertide by Beth Cartwright 

Type: Novel  Publisher: Del Rey  Release date: July 30 

Den of Geek says: This has won a lot of praise for its prose. While some fairy tale adaptations can come off as empty, not actually adding anything to the context of the tradition they’re supposedly writing in, this one’s specificity seems like it might set it apart and add detail to the central metaphor about a young girl’s search for her family. 

Publisher’s summary: Born covered in the feathers of a bird, and kept hidden in a crumbling house full of secrets, Marea has always known she was different, but never known why. And so to find answers, she goes in search of the father she has never met.

The hunt leads her to the City of Murmurs, a place of mermaids and mystery, where jars of swirling mist are carried through the streets by the broken-hearted.

And Mara will never forget what she learns there.

Buy Feathertide by Beth Cartwright on Amazon.

Running by Natalia Sylvester 

Type: Novel  Publisher: Clarion Books Release date: July 14 

Den of Geek says: A political novel of a different type. This fantasy of being part of a presidential campaign seems like it has a lot to say about family and change. 

Publisher’s summary: In this authentic, humorous, and gorgeously written debut novel about privacy, waking up, and speaking up, Senator Anthony Ruiz is running for president. Throughout his successful political career he has always had his daughter’s vote, but a presidential campaign brings a whole new level of scrutiny to sheltered fifteen-year-old Mariana and the rest of her Cuban American family, from a 60 Minutes–style tour of their house to tabloids doctoring photos and inventing scandals. As tensions rise within the Ruiz family, Mari begins to learn about the details of her father’s political positions, and she realizes that her father is not the man she thought he was.

But how do you find your voice when everyone’s watching? When it means disagreeing with your father—publicly? What do you do when your dad stops being your hero? Will Mari get a chance to confront her father? If she does, will she have the courage to seize it? 

Buy Running by Natalia Sylvester on Amazon.

A Beautifully Foolish Endeavor by Hank Green 

Type: Novel  Publisher: Dutton  Release date: July 7 

Den of Geek says: YouTube sensation Hank Green’s science fiction debut, An Absolutely Remarkable Thing, kicked off this series about alien robots. The sequel shows the aftermath, and continues to engage with the author’s internet in internet culture and science. 

Publisher’s summary: The Carls disappeared the same way they appeared, in an instant. While the robots were on Earth, they caused confusion and destruction with only their presence. Part of their maelstrom was the sudden viral fame and untimely death of April May: a young woman who stumbled into Carl’s path, giving them their name, becoming their advocate, and putting herself in the middle of an avalanche of conspiracy theories. 

Months later, April’s friends are trying to find their footing in a post-Carl world. Andy has picked up April’s mantle of fame, speaking at conferences and online; Maya, ravaged by grief, begins to follow a string of mysteries that she is convinced will lead her to April; and Miranda is contemplating defying her friends’ advice and pursuing a new scientific operation…one that might have repercussions beyond anyone’s comprehension. Just as it is starting to seem like the gang may never learn the real story behind the events that changed their lives forever, a series of clues arrive—mysterious books that seem to predict the future and control the actions of their readers—all of which seems to suggest that April could be very much alive. 

In the midst of the search for the truth and the search for April is a growing force, something that wants to capture our consciousness and even control our reality. A Beautifully Foolish Endeavor is the bold and brilliant follow-up to An Absolutely Remarkable Thing. It is a fast-paced adventure that is also a biting social commentary, asking hard, urgent questions about the way we live, our freedoms, our future, and how we handle the unknown.

Buy A Beautifully Foolish Endeavor by Hank Green on Amazon.

Top New YA Books June 2020 

A Song Below Water by Bethany C. Morrow 

Type: Novel Publisher: Tor Teen Release date: June 2 

Den of Geek says: After reading The Deep, I’m on board with the idea of black mermaids meeting YA fantasy world-building. The friendship at the center of this novel sounds cute and sweet. 

Publisher’s summary: In a society determined to keep her under lock and key, Tavia must hide her siren powers. 

Meanwhile, Effie is fighting her own family struggles, pitted against literal demons from her past. Together, these best friends must navigate through the perils of high school’s junior year.

But everything changes in the aftermath of a siren murder trial that rocks the nation, and Tavia accidentally lets out her magical voice at the worst possible moment.

Soon, nothing in Portland, Oregon, seems safe. To save themselves from drowning, it’s only Tavia and Effie’s unbreakable sisterhood that proves to be the strongest magic of all.

Buy A Song Below Water by Bethany C. Morrow on Amazon Read our interview with Bethany C. Morrow

Hood by Jenny Elder Moke 

Type: Novel  Publisher: Disney-Hyperion  Release date: June 9

Den of Geek says: An adventure in which a young girl joins Robin Hood’s adventures, this one reminds me of fanfic in the best way. A re-examination of legendary characters with the pacing of contemporary YA could be cinematic fun. 

Publisher’s summary: You have the blood of kings and rebels within you, love. Let it rise to meet the call.

Isabelle of Kirklees has only ever known a quiet life inside the sheltered walls of the convent, where she lives with her mother, Marien. But after she is arrested by royal soldiers for defending innocent villagers, Isabelle becomes the target of the Wolf, King John’s ruthless right hand. Desperate to keep her daughter safe, Marien helps Isabelle escape and sends her on a mission to find the one person who can help: Isabelle’s father, Robin Hood. 

As Isabelle races to stay out of the Wolf’s clutches and find the father she’s never known, she is thrust into a world of thieves and mercenaries, handsome young outlaws, new enemies with old grudges, and a king who wants her entire family dead. As she joins forces with Robin and his Merry Men in a final battle against the Wolf, will Isabelle find the strength to defy the crown and save the lives of everyone she holds dear?

In Hood, author Jenny Elder Moke reimagines the world of Robin Hood in lush, historical detail and imbues her story with more breathless action than has ever come out of Sherwood Forest before. This novel is a must-read for historical-fiction fans, adventure lovers, and reluctant readers alike!

Buy Hood by Jenny Elder Moke on Amazon

Sisters of Sword and Song by Rebecca Ross 

Type: Novel Publisher: HarperTeen Release date: June 23

Den of Geek says: A sisterly bond provides the heart at the center of this story of magic and war. The Ancient Greece-inspired world and the promise of magic and battles look good, but the emphasis on characterization and familial love raise this one above the rest. 

Publisher’s summary: After eight years, Evadne will finally be reunited with her older sister, Halcyon, who has been serving in the queen’s army. But when Halcyon unexpectedly appears a day early, Eva knows something is wrong. Halcyon has charged with a heinous crime, and though her life is spared, she is sentenced to 15 years. 

Suspicious of the charges, brought forth by Halcyon’s army commander, as well as the details of the crime, Eva volunteers to take part of her sister’s sentence. If there’s a way to absolve Halcyon, she’ll find it. But as the sisters begin their sentences, they quickly learn that there are fates worse than death.

Buy Sisters of Sword and Song by Rebecca Ross on Amazon 

Top New YA in May 2020 

The Ballad of Songbirds and Snakes by Suzanne Collins 

Type: Novel  Publisher: Scholastic Press  Release date: May 19 

Den of Geek says: It’s arguable whether a new Hunger Games book from the point of view of the man who will become the despotic President Snow is really what readers wanted, but it’s here. Inevitably this one will spark a lot of conversation after the runaway success of the original series. 

Publisher’s summary: It is the morning of the reaping that will kick off the tenth annual Hunger Games. In the Capitol, eighteen-year-old Coriolanus Snow is preparing for his one shot at glory as a mentor in the Games. The once-mighty house of Snow has fallen on hard times, its fate hanging on the slender chance that Coriolanus will be able to outcharm, outwit, and outmaneuver his fellow students to mentor the winning tribute.

The odds are against him. He’s been given the humiliating assignment of mentoring the female tribute from District 12, the lowest of the low. Their fates are now completely intertwined — every choice Coriolanus makes could lead to favor or failure, triumph or ruin. Inside the arena, it will be a fight to the death. Outside the arena, Coriolanus starts to feel for his doomed tribute . . . and must weigh his need to follow the rules against his desire to survive no matter what it takes.

Buy The Ballad of Songbirds and Snakes by Suzanne Collins.

House of Dragons by Jessica Cluess  

Type: Novel  Publisher: Random House Books for Young Readers Release date: May 12 

Den of Geek says: This YA fantasy distinguishes itself primarily by a varied cast of five characters, making it a good introduction to epic fantasy plus the “fun group of friends” appeal of a superhero squad. Also, there are dragons and a frightening fantasy job interview, two of my favorite things. 

Publisher’s summary: When the Emperor dies, the five royal houses of Etrusia attend the Call, where one of their own will be selected to compete for the throne. It is always the oldest child, the one who has been preparing for years to compete in the Trial. But this year is different. This year these five outcasts will answer the call. . . .

THE LIAR: Emilia must hide her dark magic or be put to death.

THE SOLDIER: Lucian is a warrior who has sworn to never lift a sword again.

THE SERVANT: Vespir is a dragon trainer whose skills alone will keep her in the game.

THE THIEF: Ajax knows that nothing is free–he must take what he wants.

THE MURDERER: Hyperia was born to rule and will stop at nothing to take her throne.

Buy House of Dragons by Jessica Cluess.

Clap When You Land by Elizabeth Acevedo 

Type: Novel 

Publisher: Quill Tree Books 

Release date: May 5 

Den of Geek says: This looks like it could be both a tearjerker and a sweet story of sisterly love. The tragic death of their father brings Camino and Yahaira Rios into each other’s lives in a new way. 

Publisher’s summary: Camino Rios lives for the summers when her father visits her in the Dominican Republic. But this time, on the day when his plane is supposed to land, Camino arrives at the airport to see crowds of crying people…

In New York City, Yahaira Rios is called to the principal’s office, where her mother is waiting to tell her that her father, her hero, has died in a plane crash.

Separated by distance—and Papi’s secrets—the two girls are forced to face a new reality in which their father is dead and their lives are forever altered.

And then, when it seems like they’ve lost everything of their father, they learn of each other. 

Buy Clap When You Land by Elizabeth Acevedo.

Top New YA in April 2020

Little Universes by Heather Demetrios

Type: Novel  Publisher: Henry Holt and Co.  Release date: April 7 

Den of Geek says: It’s not often that YA books focus on family, and the sisterly relationship at the heart of Little Universes looks well-crafted and heart-wrenching. When tragedy strikes, each sister will need to find a way to move on. 

Publisher’s summary: One wave: that’s all it takes for the rest of Mae and Hannah Winters’ lives to change.

When a tsunami strikes the island their parents are vacationing on in Malaysia, it soon becomes clear that their parents are never coming home. Forced to move to Boston from their sunny California home for the rest of their senior year, each girl struggles with secrets their parents’ death has brought to light and with their uncertainty about the future. Instead of getting closer, it feels like the wave has torn them apart.

Little Universes explores the powerful bond of sisters, the kinds of love that never die, and the journey we all must make through the baffling cruelty and unexpected beauty of human life in an incomprehensible universe.

Buy Little Universes by Heather Demetrios on Amazon.

What I Like About You by Marisa Kanter

Type: Novel  Publisher: Simon & Schuster Books for Young Readers Release date: April 7 

Den of Geek says: YA romance, and digital age romance in particular, can easily come off as cheesy or derivative. But this ‘love triangle between two people’ looks like a twist on relationships and online identity, plus the coziness of a crush story. 

Publisher’s summary: There are a million things that Halle Levitt likes about her online best friend, Nash.

He’s an incredibly talented graphic novelist. He loves books almost as much as she does. And she never has to deal with the awkwardness of seeing him in real life. They can talk about anything…

Except who she really is.

Because online, Halle isn’t Halle—she’s Kels, the enigmatically cool creator of One True Pastry, a YA book blog that pairs epic custom cupcakes with covers and reviews. Kels has everything Halle doesn’t: friends, a growing platform, tons of confidence, and Nash.

That is, until Halle arrives to spend senior year in Gramps’s small town and finds herself face-to-face with real, human, not-behind-a-screen Nash. Nash, who is somehow everywhere she goes—in her classes, at the bakery, even at synagogue.

Nash who has no idea she’s actually Kels.

If Halle tells him who she is, it will ruin the non-awkward magic of their digital friendship. Not telling him though, means it can never be anything more. Because while she starts to fall for Nash as Halle…he’s in love with Kels. 

Buy What I Like About You by Marisa Kanter on Amazon.

Elysium Girls by Kate Pentecost 

Type: Novel Publisher: Disney-Hyperion Release date: April 14 

Den of Geek says: It’s an interesting time for historical fantasy, and this looks a bit like a YA cousin of Upright Women Wanted, with more robots and monsters. Check out the crunchy mechanical horses on that cover. 

Publisher’s summary: In this sweeping Dust Bowl-inspired fantasy, a ten-year game between Life and Death pits the walled Oklahoma city of Elysium-including a girl gang of witches and a demon who longs for humanity-against the supernatural in order to judge mankind.

When Sal is named Successor to Mother Morevna, a powerful witch and leader of Elysium, she jumps at the chance to prove herself to the town. Ever since she was a kid, Sal has been plagued by false visions of rain, and though people think she’s a liar, she knows she’s a leader. Even the arrival of enigmatic outsider Asa-a human-obsessed demon in disguise-doesn’t shake her confidence in her ability. Until a terrible mistake results in both Sal and Asa’s exile into the Desert of Dust and Steel.

Face-to-face with a brutal, unforgiving landscape, Sal and Asa join a gang of girls headed by another Elysium exile-and young witch herself-Olivia Rosales. In order to atone for their mistake, they create a cavalry of magic powered, scrap metal horses to save Elysium from the coming apocalypse. But Sal, Asa, and Olivia must do more than simply tip the scales in Elysium’s favor-only by reinventing the rules can they beat the Life and Death at their own game. 

Buy Elysium Girls by Kate Pentecost on Amazon.

Top New YA Books in March 2020 

The Kingdom of Back by Marie Lu

Type: Novel Publisher: G.P. Putnam’s Sons Books for Young Readers Release date: March 3, 2020 Den of Geek says: To put a twist on historical fantasy, author Marie Lu focuses just to the side of a world-changing life. Nannerl Mozart was a real person, and has appeared in fiction before with the aim of bringing some recognition to the famous musician’s talented but forgotten sister. The fairy tale element sounds like it will provide strong atmosphere in this musical novel. Publisher’s Summary: Born with a gift for music, Nannerl Mozart has just one wish–to be remembered forever. But even as she delights audiences with her masterful playing, she has little hope she’ll ever become the acclaimed composer she longs to be. She is a young woman in 18th century Europe, and that means composing is forbidden to her. She will perform only until she reaches a marriageable age–her tyrannical father has made that much clear.

And as Nannerl’s hope grows dimmer with each passing year, the talents of her beloved younger brother, Wolfgang, only seem to shine brighter. His brilliance begins to eclipse her own, until one day a mysterious stranger from a magical land appears with an irresistible offer. He has the power to make her wish come true–but his help may cost her everything.

In her first work of historical fiction, #1 New York Times bestselling author Marie Lu spins a lush, lyrically-told story of music, magic, and the unbreakable bond between a brother and sister.

Buy The Kingdom of Back on Amazon.

The Fire Never Goes Out by Noelle Stevenson

Type: Illustrated memoir  Publisher: HarperTeen Release date: March 3 Den of Geek says: Stevenson’s cute illustrations and enthusiastic storytelling have delighted me in her adaptation She-Ra and the Princesses of Power, so a look into her life and career sounds like an interesting look into the business of art, the animation industry, and living as a creative person. Publisher’s Summary: From Noelle Stevenson, the New York Times bestselling author-illustrator of Nimona, comes a captivating, honest illustrated memoir that finds her turning an important corner in her creative journey—and inviting readers along for the ride.

In a collection of essays and personal mini-comics that span eight years of her young adult life, author-illustrator Noelle Stevenson charts the highs and lows of being a creative human in the world. Whether it’s hearing the wrong name called at her art school graduation ceremony or becoming a National Book Award finalist for her debut graphic novel, Nimona, Noelle captures the little and big moments that make up a real life, with a wit, wisdom, and vulnerability that are all her own.

Buy The Fire Never Goes Out on Amazon.

A Phoenix First Must Burn, edited by Patrice Caldwell

Type: Anthology Publisher: Viking Books for Young Readers Release Date: March 10

Den of Geek says: A grab-bag of some of the best writers of color in the YA space today,this anthology faces challenges head-on to tell stories of Black women and gender-non-conforming people. It looks like a good mix of realistic and fantastical stories, set past, future, and present.

Publisher’s summary: Evoking Beyoncé’s Lemonade for a teen audience, these authors who are truly Octavia Butler’s heirs, have woven worlds to create a stunning narrative that centers Black women and gender nonconforming individuals. A Phoenix First Must Burn will take you on a journey from folktales retold to futuristic societies and everything in between. Filled with stories of love and betrayal, strength and resistance, this collection contains an array of complex and true-to-life characters in which you cannot help but see yourself reflected. Witches and scientists, sisters and lovers, priestesses and rebels: the heroines of A Phoenix First Must Burn shine brightly. You will never forget them.

Buy A Phoenix First Must Burn on Amazon.

Top New YA Books in March 2020 

Deathless Divide by Justina Ireland

Type: Novel (Second in series) Publisher: Balzer + Bray Release date: 2/4/20

Den of Geek says: Justina Ireland’s Dread Nation was a buzzy historical zombie novel with a keen awareness of racial dynamics in Civil War-era America. The sequel looks to be just as intense as the first. 

Publisher’s summary: The sequel to the New York Times bestselling epic Dread Nation is an unforgettable journey of revenge and salvation across a divided America.

After the fall of Summerland, Jane McKeene hoped her life would get simpler: Get out of town, stay alive, and head west to California to find her mother.

But nothing is easy when you’re a girl trained in putting down the restless dead, and a devastating loss on the road to a protected village called Nicodemus has Jane questioning everything she thought she knew about surviving in 1880s America.

What’s more, this safe haven is not what it appears—as Jane discovers when she sees familiar faces from Summerland amid this new society. Caught between mysteries and lies, the undead, and her own inner demons, Jane soon finds herself on a dark path of blood and violence that threatens to consume her.

But she won’t be in it alone.

Katherine Deveraux never expected to be allied with Jane McKeene. But after the hell she has endured, she knows friends are hard to come by—and that Jane needs her too, whether Jane wants to admit it or not.

Watching Jane’s back, however, is more than she bargained for, and when they both reach a breaking point, it’s up to Katherine to keep hope alive—even as she begins to fear that there is no happily-ever-after for girls like her.

Buy Deathless Divide by Justina Ireland on Amazon.

Cast Away: Poems for Our Time by Naomi Shihab Nye 

Type: Poetry Publisher: Greenwillow Books Release date: 2/11/2020

Den of Geek says: This unique book of poetry seems perfectly suited to today’s environmental and humanitarian issues. What happens to the things we throw away? What happens to the people who aren’t wanted? The metaphor is rich.

Publisher’s summary: Acclaimed poet and Young People’s Poet Laureate Naomi Shihab Nye shines a spotlight on the things we cast away, from plastic water bottles to those less fortunate, in this collection of more than eighty original and never-before-published poems. A deeply moving, sometimes funny, and always provocative poetry collection for all ages.

“Nye at her engaging, insightful best.”―Kirkus (starred review)

“How much have you thrown away in your lifetime already? Do you ever think about it? Where does this plethora of leavings come from? How long does it take you, even one little you, to fill the can by your desk?”―Naomi Shihab Nye

National Book Award Finalist, Young People’s Poet Laureate, and devoted trash-picker-upper Naomi Shihab Nye explores these questions and more in this original collection of poetry that features more than eighty new poems. “I couldn’t save the world, but I could pick up trash,” she says in her introduction to this stunning volume.

With poems about food wrappers, lost mittens, plastic straws, refugee children, trashy talk, the environment, connection, community, responsibility to the planet, politics, immigration, time, junk mail, trash collectors, garbage trucks, all that we carry and all that we discard, this is a rich, engaging, moving, and sometimes humorous collection for readers ages twelve to adult.

Buy Cast Away: Poems for Our Time on Amazon.

Rebelwing by Andrea Tang 

Type: Novel Publisher: Razorbill Release date: 2/25/20

Den of Geek says: Robot dragons? What more to say? The fantastical war story setting and high-energy cast of characters looks like it’ll make this one a good read for fans of Pacific Rim.

Publisher’s summary: Things just got weird for Prudence Wu. 

One minute, she’s cashing in on a routine smuggling deal. The next, she’s escaping enforcers on the wings of what very much appears to be a sentient cybernetic dragon. 

Pru is used to life throwing her some unpleasant surprises–she goes to prep school, after all, and selling banned media across the border in a country with a ruthless corporate government obviously has its risks. But a cybernetic dragon? That’s new. 

She tries to forget about the fact that the only reason she’s not in jail is because some sort of robot saved her, and that she’s going to have to get a new side job now that enforcers are on to her. So she’s not exactly thrilled when Rebelwing shows up again. 

Even worse, it’s become increasingly clear that the rogue machine has imprinted on her permanently, which means she’d better figure out this whole piloting-a-dragon thing–fast. Because Rebelwing just happens to be the ridiculously expensive weapon her government needs in a brewing war with its neighbor, and Pru’s the only one who can fly it. 

Set in a wonderfully inventive near-future Washington, D.C., this hilarious, defiant debut sparkles with wit and wisdom, deftly exploring media consumption, personal freedoms, and the weight of one life as Pru, rather reluctantly, takes to the skies.

cnx.cmd.push(function() { cnx({ playerId: "106e33c0-3911-473c-b599-b1426db57530", }).render("0270c398a82f44f49c23c16122516796"); });

The post Top New YA Books in December 2020 appeared first on Den of Geek.

from Den of Geek https://ift.tt/2Ro14iD

[erideights]

Through history to get to you. (1)

Request by @adela-topaz-caelon : Reader's an angel casted out of heaven because, well, she's weird. She's in love with Crowley and, of course Crowley is in love with her. Our poor Aziraphale is just fucking tired of seeing how neither of them realize the feelings of the other.

Part two: here

Pairing: Crowley x Angel!Reader (Good Omens)

Word Count: 3215.

Warnings: none.

A/N: I'm sorry, I didn't wanna make this request in two parts but I was having inspiration problems and... Well. I'll post the second part tomorrow, by the way. I hope you guys like this!

4004 B.C., the day that every christian remembers as the moment when everything went wrong,— when God expelled humanity from paradise and condemned them to an unhappy existence for the rest of their days because Eve bit the forbidden apple and escaped with Adam from the Garden of Eden; yeah, that day—, an angel and a demon were chatting for the first time in their lives, both standing on the top of the east gate wall of that cage of life that the first two humans in history left behind.

They were not friends, oh no, quite the opposite, they were hereditary enemies, but even so, they shared their existential concerns in a calm, friendly tone, typical of those who have known each other for a lifetime.

But they hadn’t know each other 10 minutes ago.

Meanwhile, another of the so many of the angels of Heaven, one expelled from it by her disturbing peculiarities but not bad enough —or so God considered it— to make her fall to Hell, observed from the north gate how his winged companion gave refuge to the vile demon of the first rain fallen on earth, and before she could realize it, she smiled.

Her corners rose in a sweet and tender expression before even being able to stop to think what it meant something like that, holy rain falling on her face, her clothes and her own wings, soaking every inch of her being until there was not a single dry hair.

Y/N was, indeed, peculiar, her way of seeing the world was completely out of tune with the rest of the cold, calculating, maniac and, in a summary, good soldiers of God who didn’t question absolutely anything that is ordered.

She must have fallen with the others, many thought, but she didn’t.

Instead, and because of the obvious discomfort that the playful angel caused in others, God simply and subtly banished her from Heaven, assuring her that her mission on Earth, guarding the North Gate of the Garden of Eden, was much more important than anything else she could do up there.

And that was the last thing God ever told her.

But she couldn’t care less, in fact, she was happy with her fate; she knew that wasn’t her place, anyway. She always knew.

''Hey, Aziraphale.'' Y/N greeted with a melodious tinkle in her voice, appearing out of nowhere and successfully scaring her co-worker. A sweet laugh then echoed in the girl's throat, whose wings swayed with the gentle breeze that ran up there.

''Y-Y/N, please,'' the blond platinum angel begged, right hand positioned over his left lung. ''You need to stop doing that to me because one day my heart won’t be able to take it anymore and the heart attack will send me right back to Heaven. Do you have any idea how much paperwork would be done? Uncountable.''

During his reprimand, the girl watched her colleague with a devilish smirk in her lips, enjoying every word of the dramatic attacks suffered by the former bearer of the flaming sword. But her eyes, inevitably and within a few seconds, went to a specific point on the ground, back to the garden, not too far from the apple tree and there they remained much longer than she would have thought, feeling how her attention was slowly fading away and the voice of the angel deafened with each second of the clock.

As expected, Aziraphale noticed this, but before he could ask out loud, Y/N beated him to it: ‘’Who was him?’’

Him? Was she talking about...?

‘’Crawly’’ he answered, knowing that lying to his extroverted companion was totally useless; she wouldn’t stop until she got the answers she wanted. Anyway, in his voice could be felt a bit of anxiety for that same matter. ‘’A demon.’’

''Oh, well'' her answer was immediate and without thinking, very typical when talking with Y/N. ''He's hot.''

41 AD, soft music enveloped a crowded tavern in some corner of the large and great Rome, warm weather, pleasant atmosphere and its people dressed in sleeveless tunics in pale ochre, white, or cinnamon tones.

Or at least most of them.

Then there she was, sitting on a low wooden bench next to a table not much taller than it, its surface occupied by a distant predecessor of the chess whose pieces consisted of stones and board on a sheet of brown leather.

She wore the typical and loose roman dress, barely fitted in her chest and waist by two thin bands that held the soft textile against her body, but it was in a eye-catching green color, making her stand out —inevitably— from the others.

In addition, her long hair was braided into a hairstyle that resembled one of the many sculptures that capture beautiful goddesses or nymphs of the mythology they so venerated, making her impossible to avoid in the eyes of the others; she was beautiful.

Perhaps the attention of many others was placed on her, a star that seemed to shine with its own light, but she didn’t notice it, her big eyes watching carefully the funny expressions Aziraphale adopted in his face while he decided what his next move would be, and it wasn’t until her friend's attention was scattered, stolen elsewhere —some point behind her— that  for the first time, the girl turned around to see.

Sitting on a stool, he was leaning slightly on the bar that separated the woman who attended the inn and the rest of the clients, his voice loud and clear, asking for anything that could be drunk. His body was covered by the typical clothing for men in that time, a tunic that reached to the ground and a horizontal piece held by a golden pin on his left shoulder, but like her, the black color he wore made him stand out from any of the others in the room.

Y/N found herself holding her breath; It was him.

She couldn’t believe she was seeing him again, not after 4,000 years since that day in the garden.

Aziraphale, who since his escape from Eden had spent a considerable amount of time with her, had dropped in some occasions, when both were reunited again after some of the many adventures that the woman liked to live on her own, that he met by chance the —for her— attractive demon, and in each and every one of these times, without missing, Y/N sighed abstracted, assuring her friend that she envied him so much.

It was stupid! A nonsense, feeling her heart beating faster inside her chest when she hadn’t even spoken to him once, when she hadn’t seen the color of his eyes or feel his voice reaching her ears, but the vague memory of the fallen angel on the wall of the garden knocked at her door some nights, and she couldn’t help but wonder what he would be like.

But that was how she was, an angel repudiated by her insatiable curiosity and her uncontrollable range of emotions that, for nothing in the world, she tried to repress or hide from anyone.

So, as expected, Aziraphale, with a small smile on his lips and feeling soft by her friend's attitude —although he didn’t understand it and, at times, even scared him because, for God's sake, he was a demon!— he realized instantly what was happening. "Do you want to come with me to say hello?" He asked in that tone of voice that he used to use when he was with her, full of love and understanding, of empathy and affection for an angel like her. ''I could, I don’t know, introduce you to him'' Aziraphale suggested right away, believing that such an idea would excite her to no end.

'’What?'' Y/N's head spinned so fast it was hard to believe she hadn’t hurt her neck in the process, and even though there was no blush on her cheeks, her expression, her eyes, left to see how nervous a scenario like that made her be. ''No no no no. What would I say? I can’t do it.'’

One could believe a celestial being like her, given her history and extrovert personality, able to get away with any situation and talk to anyone —whether or not she previously meet them—, would never feel embarrassed no matter what. The fact of her being nervous was, simply, unthinkable, but that same day, Aziraphale learned that, in matters of the heart, Y/N felt much more than she was physically and mentally able to endure.

Who knew the reason?

The only thing he totally understood was that the relationship between his friend and that very human emotion called love was so pure, so convoluted in its own way and so latent within her, that for the first time in 4000 years— and with absolute certainty, it wouldn’t be the last— he saw her hysterical, alarmed and a totally loss for words.

Little did she know that, the moment she finally introduced herself to Crawly —Crowley, as he corrected with that deep and velvety voice of his— and didn’t know after what façade hiding those skin-deep nerves that pushed her to play with her own hands and smiling like an absolute idiot throughout the meeting, the demon felt his heart skipped a beat, falling for her long before he could stop it.

Of course, the only one who noticed this was Aziraphale, who from the outside could see with absolute clarity how an angel and a demon smiled at each other, chatted at ease —after 10 minutes in which Y/N didn’t know what to say and Crowley practically had to tear the words out of her mouth— and in their eyes, a strange feeling that they would be shaping during their many encounters over almost 2,000 years for them was reflected, beginning this way an endless torture for Aziraphale.

Nowadays...

‘’Aziraphale.’’ A beautiful voice pleaded, although it sounded more like a warning to the angel who, without stopping, reminded her each and every one of her encounters with the love of her life as if he was the author of a painful love story whose end was still to write.

He was killing her patience.

‘’Aziraphale…’’ She tried again, this time a little louder and lengthening the last vowel of his name, emitting a heavy nasal sigh as her whole body rocked to the rhythm of that same breath.

She was going to explode.

‘’Aziraphale!’’ She exclaimed after a few seconds, seeing that the rest of her attempts were completely useless and that, if she didn’t scream, she would never be able to shut her friend up, who then watched her with eyes wide open and an expression between confused and offended. ''I get it! I fucking get it!'' She breathed, exasperated with the situation almost as much as the angel in front of her. ''But I won’t do it. You know I can’t.''

The blonde snorted, frowned and pressed his lips in a thin line that, in silence, intended to reprimand his friend for her behavior.

And strangely, even though Y/N was used to that mixture of anger and disappointment, he got it.

''Oh c’mon, don’t look at me like that! You know I’m physically incapable. Do you remember that human I was interested in in 1487, Florence?"

‘’You’re talking about Leonardo da Vinci, aren't you?’’

‘’Yeah, him!’’ Oh, everyone remembered those years, when Y/N fell in love with the young, eccentric, faddy and complicated artist and couldn’t do more than talk about him.

At all hours.

All over the place.

Oh, the girl was head over heels for him.

''You know I tried. Hundreds of times. But each and every time I felt a knot in my stomach and my brain stopped working," she apologized, lowering her gaze until she lost it somewhere on the ground, far from the eyes of the angel that only judged her in the distance and in silence. ''Also, it wouldn’t have worked. I'm sure he didn’t like me that way.’'

And there are theories that would refute the young woman's suspicions, such as the rumor that Leonardo da Vinci was homosexual when, all those who knew him, knew for sure he didn’t dislike anything, and enjoyed both female and male company at all hours.

Leonardo's problem, if Aziraphale didn’t remember badly —and he didn’t usually do— was that he was only truly committed to his art, and the moment when perhaps he considered committing himself to someone else —one of his many muses— and shared this thought one night with one of his questionable friends... this one definitely convinced him not to do it.

Aziraphale nipped nervously at his lower lip; he knew the one who convinced the young artist not to take the step with his friend was no one else than Crowley. He could still hear the music of the florentine tavern that night, the voices shouting one above the other and the demon doing what he knew best, manipulating others to dance to his song, assuring Leonardo that love wasn’t gonna do more than hinder his art career.

Jealous selfish bastard, he wanted her for him.

''W-Well, but that was eons ago, my dear. I thought you’d overcome a long time ago from the story with Leonardo.''

''Yeah, I got over it, of course, don’t get me wrong, that's not what I'm saying, '' quickly corrected the girl, raising her eyes again to meet her friend's, catching the guilty look in that ones but deciding to leave it aside and not to ask about it. ''All I’m saying is if I couldn’t do it with him and he was a human like any other who would die after no more than 80 years... How could I do it with Crowley? Just to think about it terrifies me.''

But recapping, he knew his friend had had a partner on more than one occasion. Lasting more or less time, the girl had her fun throughout history; so in summary, her problem was only and exclusively confessing, taking the first step.

It hurted, even physically, because he was literally fed up with watching Crowley and Y/N constantly flirting with each other but at the moment of truth, they both thought it was just a game, a joke, part of their relationship and their personalities, nothing more.

How could they be so fucking blind!?

''I know, I indeed know, the only thing I say is that... the situation has already become untenable. What am I saying? It has been almost 2000 years. But before, Crowley and you only saw each other on rare occasions, once every 30 or 50 years with luck. Now? Almost every day." He reasoned, sighing deeply and calmly and leaning his body a little forward to be a little closer to his friend. '’Besides, you know he’s gonna notice that sooner or later.'' And without thinking twice, the angel brushed the exposed skin behind his own right ear, tearing from the girl's throat an audible gasp, almost like a silent scream.

‘’Shut up!’’ Y/N's eyes quickly scanned the room, panicking, making sure the aforementioned demon wasn’t sneaking around and, instinctively, covering the same ear Aziraphale had touched on himself. ‘’I swear to God If you say anything about it I’ll—’’

‘’I never told him and I promised not to do it in death or life. Your secret is safe with me.'' He assured, amused by the girl's reaction. "But being honest, it's a miracle you managed to hide it for almost 30 years. Someday he’s gonna see it, Y/N, and I can only hope that by then, you have confessed what you feel because otherwise it would be, how to say it? Wild.’’

To understand the conversation the two angels kept in the back room of this small bookshop in London, we must move to the late 80's, when during one of her worst drunkenness, Y/N couldn’t think of anything better than tattooing herself a snake identical to the one Crowley wore on his sideburn, but behind her right ear.

When Aziraphale heard about this the next day, he was absolutely scandalized, asking why. The answer he got? '' Because I know he hates it because it reminds him of Hell but I like it because it's part of who he is and I wanted him to be loved.'' But of course —sober— she knew it was definitely a bad idea and she couldn’t show it to him under no circumstance.

For some odd reason, she didn’t want to miracle it away either, so her strategy during those 30 years was to leave her hair loose and relatively long so he couldn’t see it.

'’Listen, Aziraphale,'' the girl started, turning the curl over again, having had this conversation with her friend countless times throughout her life. And it’s not that she didn’t appreciate his tireless attempts to see her happy and from the hand of the demon that had stolen her heart, it’s that she didn’t believe it was even possible. ''I appreciate what you're trying to do, really, and you know you're my best friend and I'd follow you to the end of the world again, if necessary, but I can’t look Crowley in the eye and tell him I've been in love with him long before the wheel was invented.'' It felt like she was apologizing to him, but anyone would know that the real apology was directed to her heart for not following her feelings and doing what they dictated. ''What I can promise you,'' she rose from her seat after a small pat on her own legs. ''is that I’ll try not to talk to you about this ever again so as not burn your patience so much.'' and leaving a quick kiss on the angel's cheek, Y/N waved goodbye and started walking towards the shop door.

''Thanks for the coffee!''

‘’She’s gonna kill me, isn’t she?’’ Aziraphale's voice rose fearfully, concerned once the bell on the door of the bookshop signaled that his friend had left and slow steps were noticed right behind him, stopping by his side.

‘’Yeah, probably.’’ But the face of the demon showed no concern for the angel, too happy to do anything but bite his bottom lip in order to hide the huge smile that threatened to spread through his face.

He still couldn’t believe all that he’d heard, hidden for at least a couple hours behind one of the huge and crowded shelves of the place.

‘’Well, you better take advantage of the situation so that all the paperwork I’ll have to do if that happens would be worth it, Crowley.’’

[ao3feed-goodomens]

Before The Beginning

read it on the AO3 at https://ift.tt/2LF1K18

by phlintandsteel

"Do you think of me, while you're out building stars?"

A flutter of wings.

A whisper in the spaces between their atoms.

Red hair lit up like its own halo, like Raphael is twice as holy, twice as important as any other angel.

And he is...

He is.

"Every moment, angel."

Words: 7193, Chapters: 1/1, Language: English

Fandoms: Good Omens (TV), Good Omens - Neil Gaiman & Terry Pratchett

Rating: Not Rated

Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply

Categories: M/M, Other

Characters: Aziraphale, Crowley, Gabriel, Beelzebub, Dagon, God, Lucifer, Death - Character

Relationships: Aziraphale/Crowley (Good Omens)

Additional Tags: Crowley-as-Raphael, Aziraphale-as-Jehoel, ineffable husbands, playing fast and loose with angelic mythology here, from beginning to end and back again, Angst, falling, the ineffable plan, Aziraphale is a badass, Crowley questions, but it all works out

read it on the AO3 at https://ift.tt/2LF1K18

[cowardsanctuary]

The Fanfic! they are humans and im not so proud of the peoples Povs

me, the coward: (fanfic placed under a readmore just in case! <3)

hey, apologies for the lateness of responding to this! (i got this like, an entire 24 hours ago LMAO). but!!! i read this and!!! IT WAS SO CUTE I LOVED IT…. i love how smug nickel was, and how exasperated mic was aieprvnjdrkvkbth thank you for sharing!!! i really appreciate it!!! here’s a quick fandoodle of a scene for your troubles!

No ones Pov~

Currently, nickel was walking in the perilous forest. He wasn’t that far in the forest, yet there was still no one near him. He was completely by himself and his thoughts. This was actually quite needed. Baseball recently asked nickel to teach him how to sing, or at least sing with more confidence. Nickel was the best choice to teach him, with his massive amount of knowledge of the music theory and, in baseballs words at least, “heavenly” singing. He wanted to teach baseball, being his closest friend and all, but he wanted to keep his voice a secret only for himself. That leads to what’s happening now. Nickel almost zoned out entirely walking in a forest. He was snapped to his thoughts by what seemed to be whimpering and yelping. It sounded like two dogs or wolves are making those noises. Now, nickel wasn’t heartless. Hell, he even started to bring med supplies and a needle and cleaned thread to help wounded animals. He didn’t want to leave them, so he started to run to the sounds. Once nickel got close enough, he was met with two wolves, a puppy and what seemed to be its mother. The puppy has a slash on its right front leg. the Gash spanned from its shoulder to halfway down the puppy’s leg. It looked brutal, and the baby wolf was crying out in pain. It definitely looked brutal, but not the worst he has seen. That didn’t mean he didn’t feel that blunt pain in his chest. The same pain you get when you see something horrible done to something innocent and undeserving. The mother was also crying out, But not it pain though. The mother was howling out of concern  and to go get help. The mother saw nickel and started to growl, and stood up. Nickel wasn’t phased by this though. He simply held out one of his small hands in a ‘stop’ pose. Once the mom calmed down enough, he balled his hand into a loose fist so she could smell him, to figure out his intentions. The mom moved and let nickel go to the puppy, but didn’t leave the perimeter. Nickel got all the necessities needed to help the poor puppy, which was a bottle filled with warm soapy water, a clean rag, gauze pads, and a roll of bandages. He didn’t start though, he couldn’t. The puppy was too stressed to actually help without problems. So, he did something that would always work to calm any animal down. Sing. He started to sing “Star of the county down”. The song was one of his favorites. Once he started singing, the puppy and even the mom started to relax. Then he started to get to work cleaning the wound and the fur around it, and also patch it up

Mic’s Pov~

Uuuuhhhhhgggg. Where the hell is taco?! I know that we can’t keep going to the same spot over and over again cause of knife, but she can at least tell me where we are meeting next! Currently, I was who knows how deep in the forest, and ! “taaccoo-?” I call out, cupping my hand around my mouth. Where is she. I stepped over a couple of tree roots as I looked around. I keep walking for like 5 minutes. Until I hear.. singing? Yea that’s definitely singing. “Oh, she smiled at me and with pride says he, That’s the gem of all Ireland’s crown. Young Rosie McCann from the banks of the Bann, She’s the Star of the County Down”. I’ve heard that song before! It's “Star of the County Down”! That song was played at a party in Hotel Oj. Who or what the fuck is singing it though?! The voice sounds waay to angelic and beautiful to be a normal human. What if its a Siren of some sorts trying to lure me and kill me?!? I started to quiver in fear. My fight or flight kicked in and I’m not willing to fight a mystical creature so I almost immediately turn on my heels and run as fast I can. I do not want to die today nope nope nope nope!!

Nickels Pov~

Wolves are a lot less fluffy than I thought they would be. Anyway, I made up my mind on if I should teach baseball or not. I chose no, but I will help if needed. I was starting to walk deeper into the woods, to a certain place where I like to take short naps in my free time. I was interrupted by someone running away shouting nope over and over again. Who the everloving fucking is that?! I quickly start to make my way towards the noise to see, mic running away while half shouting “There Is A Siren or nymph or some shIT IN THE FUCKING FOREST”. Sirens don’t exist though…. Wait, she was running away from my direction. She heard me sing and thinks i’m a siren or a nymph. I snort at that fact and start to walk back to challenge grounds. I have to take a different route though, mic might realize it was me singing and tell everyone.

Time Skip owo~

By now I have gotten back to the rest of the contestants. Mic was currently screeching at everyone that there is a land siren or something of that sort. I started to laugh slightly cause honestly, it was really funny to see her freak out over nothing

Mic is boldnickel is italics cause I am getting lazy

“wha-nickel why are you laughing!?!”

“do you actually believe that there is a Land Siren in the Perilous forest?”

“Yes!!!! I Heard It Sing!!!!!!!”

“Mic Sirens are Mythological creatures, they don’t exist”

“HOW DO YOU KNOW, IS THERE EVIDENCE?!”

“no, and there is no evidence they do exist other than a literal story book. And you saying there is one if the Perilous forest”

“WHY ARE YOU BEING SO PUSHY ABOUT IT HHHMMMMMM?!?!”

“Because you are literally being scared by something that doesn’t exist, you are a fucking pansy”

No ones Pov~

Nickel then turned on his heels smirking and walks back into the forest, leaving a yelling microphone behind him. He’ll tell baseball his answer to the teaching question later

[themildestofwriters]

Character Creation Tag

Tagged by the illustrious @gottaenjoythelittlethingzz and thought that it would probably best to get some kind of content out from my OCs. For this one, I plan on doing Josephine Williams because Babette Melwyn is a bit more complicated and divulges into territory that I do not wish to discuss when it comes to the creation of her character.

1) What was the first element of your OC that you remember considering (name, appearance, backstory, etc.)?

Basic appearance and name. She was always a Josephine and she always had that general outline of appearance (Long curly brown hair; dark skin; that kind of stuff). The rest just developed over time and the more I considered Josephine critically.

2) Did you design them with any other characters/OCs from their universe in mind?

Yes. Josephine was thought up as someone who’d help begin Babette’s happy ending. I needed a character who’d bring out the best in Babette, who’d get her on track to healing whether through giving her the confidence to go through with therapy while also reconnecting her to humanity. I feel really bad for just creating a character who’s sole purpose is to be a love interest, but fortunately, I feel as if she’s much more than her original concept would have some think. There’s still much I need to develop around her, but the same can be true for other characters such as the two leads families and even the main character (Babette) herself.

3) How did you choose their name?

I always liked the name Josephine and I was inspired by the character of Josephine Montilyet from Dragon Age: Inquisition.

4) In developing their backstory, what elements of the world that they live in played the most influential parts?

She a lesbian woman of colour living in Australia, Earth (2016), there would be a lot influencing her. Her life isn’t abhorrent, but she does face issues that I’d rather not discuss here. What counts is that her family and friends love her and so do most the people she interacts with. This story won’t explore these themes as a main focus, because that’s not the point of the story, however they will be brought up and do effect her as a character.

5) Is there any significance behind their hair colour?

There’s nothing significant behind their hair colour. I like it, is all.

6) Is there any significance behind their eye colour?

Not really. I just thought the colour fit her character. Though, if you wanted to, you could just google “Green Eye Colour Meaning” and get a few links, one of which tells you that the symbolic meaning behind green eyes, but it won’t have much baring on the character aside from the fact they’re pretty.

7) Is there any significance behind their height?

Relationship Height Difference. One of my favourite tropes is where you’ve got a very tall character and a very small character dating because of all the cute things they can do. Originally, Josephine was something like… 5’5” or 5’6” but I changed it to 5’8” because a height difference, even if it is just 5” is adorable AF and I’m pleased I decided on this.

8) What (if anything) do you relate to within their character/story?

Well, aside from the fact that I’m quite literally giving her my High School life, not much else I’d say. Josephine’s quite a bit different then me and we’ve both had very different lives. She doesn’t live in a broken family, my brother still breaths (as far as I know), she doesn’t have any sisters, I’ve never had a relationship as successful as hers, she doesn’t have to worry about what her parents will think about her non-heterosexuality (she’s already out), I don’t really have a choice about my religious practices. About the closest things I could relate to about her is how I’ve written her dealing with people and noise and whatnot.

9) Are they based off of you, in some way?

*Looks up at the previous question* Nope, not really.

10) Did you know what the OC’s sexuality would be at the time of their creation? 

Due to her original concept being a companion for Babette, yes. I needed to create a character who’d not only be able to engage with Babette as a friend but also as a significant other. Josephine was always going to have a preference for women one way or another and it just seemed right to make her gay as well.

As monogamy vs polyamory, the choice was simply as not only is Babette monogamous (making a healthy poly relationship impossible) but I’m monogamous myself so the character trait was there from day one.

11) What have you found to be most difficult about creating art for your OC (any form of art: writing, drawing, edits, etc.)?

Face claims. I could say the difficulties in finding how to write her character, but that can be worked on easily and I’ll be constantly improving my portrayal of this character. No, the real issue is that I can fecking find a good faceclaim that fits! Worse, I can’t do it for any of my characters!

12) How far past the canon events that take place in their world have you extended their story, if at all?

While I haven’t gone as far as mapping out before her birth and the preceding years after, I’ve gone far enough that I know when her story definitively ends and it’s incredibly heart-warming and cute and I can’t wait to write it! At some point, I might reach a point where I’ll decide to take a few days to just 100% full-dive into worldbuilding and fully flesh out these characters backstories in complete detail (events preceding conception to what grades they got in year 2 of Primary School) but until then, I know the basic outline of the events from their childhood to they’re old and greyed.

13) If you had to narrow it down to 2 things that you MUST keep in mind while working with your OC, what would those things be?

Her personality certainly. Without her personality, her entire position in the story changes and it would also effect how healthy the relationship is between Babette and Josephine as well as the overall result. The second one, however, is her part in the story--not necessarily as a romantic interest for Babette, but for acting as an anchor to not only reality but also humanity for her godly girlfriend.

Dating or not, it doesn’t matter, but Babette wouldn’t reconnect with humanity on her own and without a character like Josephine existing, she would’ve flown off to Pluto or something and buried herself waiting for the heat-death of the universe to kill her.

14) What is something about your OC that can make you laugh?

The fact that I’m not sure if I should make her go full butch or femme or just stay somewhere alternating between. She’s fast enough to out run you at a marathon, strong enough to beat you at arm-wrestling, would absolutely rock certain short hairstyles and a leather jacket, but at the same time she’s leaving lipstick marks on Babette’s cheeks and rocking absolutely stunning dresses.

No heels, though. She hates heels.

15) What is something about your OC that can make you cry?

The fact that when she begins learning magic from Babette, one of her first thoughts goes straight to necromancy and the idea that she could possibly maybe resurrect her late older brother.

16) Is there some element you regret adding to your OC or their story?

Just as @gottaenjoythelittlethingzz said, I’ll tell you when I find it.

17) What is the most recent thing you’ve discovered about your OC?

The most recent thing I’ve discovered about Josephine… She’s was extremely hopeful for the Wonder Woman movie and absolutely adored it when she watched it in theatres. She saw some issues but overall, she loved it and not just because Gal Gadot was a thing.

18) What is your favourite fact about your OC?

Josephine is a massive, massive, greek mythology nerd. Literally, her computer wallpaper is probably some picture of Athens or the pantheon of greeks or something like that. When Babette gives her a pet raven, she names it Cerberus. When she and Babette adopt a kitten together she names it Sappho (I blame @sunlight-melodies). She really likes greek mythology which makes interesting parallels considering her favourite greek god is Persephone and her girlfriend has been known as the God of the Dead.

Tagged, in no particular order, is: @sleepy-and-anxious, @ariellaskylark @cometworks @focusdumbass @rose-writes-and-drinks-tea @truebisexualdragon @fallen-angel-nightshade @pyr0clast @i-tried-and-i-loose @sunlight-melodies

I’ve realised that i need to keep a list of writers I follow to tag in these things because I’m absolutely horrible at remembering them all...

[lumiereswig]

i feel embarrassed to even suggest this but um. Crack fic where they somehow discover theyre fictional

what if……

what if it’s a normal day at the palace. it’s post curse: the sun shines lovely on their faces as lumiere and plumette waltz in the kitchen; the evergreen trees bristle bright green as adam walks into the forest for a bit of fresh air; the marble walls of the palace are cool and calming as lefou takes tea with mr. cogsworth. In the hidden heart of France, belle curls up happily in her new home to start her new project.

Ah, yes. The bookshelf. A cranky old piece of work, tucked in the back of one of the unused bedrooms, full of all the books nobody bothered to put in the library. They had been sitting here, undusted and unloved, for many years now; adam, even, hadn’t known what was in them or what they were.

“probably medical journals, or something,” he had said. “something boring, i don’t know. if they were interesting i would have insisted they be put in the library.”

“If you don’t know what they are, how do you know if they’re interesting?”

“Stop being cheeky.” Adam grins and goes for his walk, and Belle is smiling with the memory of it as she cracks open the glass doors—goodness, they’re grimy, Plumette hasn’t been in here—and lifts out the first book.

What do you know. A medical journal. Adam would never let her hear the end of it.

The next book was a volume of fairytales, though. She flipped through its pages—oh, ones she’d read before. No matter. The next book, Eros and Psyche, looked like Greek mythology….still in the Greek, unfortunately. She put that aside. She’d ask Adam about it later. And here, at the bottom, was a slim volume—

What a strange cover. No illustration, no real title, just text printed on the dull leather: “Press Event for Beauty and the Beast, Los Angeles, April 2017. Full coverage of all your favorite stars!”

Belle considered it for a moment. Los Angeles? That sounded like a place, maybe somewhere in Spain, but it was next to a date more than 200 years in the future. And what was a “press event”? And were the “favorite stars” some sort of guide to constellations?

“Medical journals indeed,” huffed Belle, and opened the book.

An explosion of light and sound. For one brief second, Belle felt like the book had burst into fire in her arms—and then, in the next second, like she was being sucked into it. She reached out for the glass case, trying to get a foothold back in the palace, but it was too late—she was falling, somehow, freefalling through very fast wind, and she could hear the screams of some of the staff near her but also ever so far away.

With a terrific crunch she felt herself land. Except, hold on—she couldn’t have landed, because then she would be laying crumpled somewhere, and yet she was standing here quite poised, as if she hadn’t moved at all. It was as if her body hadn’t moved at all, and just her mind had gone flying through space, into the horrible book and…wherever this was.

because this certainly wasn’t france.

she was in a garden, or rather a small back patio. and there were still gleaming walls, and bright blue sky and sun, and trees. But the trees were palm trees now, not pines; the walls were stucco, not marble; and the sun was hot on her now, as if mid-afternoon, not morning as it had been at home.

she’s not in her proper dress anymore, her comfortable blue linens and embroidered stays. She’s in some style she has never seen before: tight black trousers, like a man’s riding breeches but reaching the ankles, and a loose blouse. she checks her neck, her hands—even her mother’s jewelry has vanished, replaced by other things. she still feels right—no great change in height, or weight, or hair—but she knows, somehow, that this isn’t her. she turns toward the house behind her—not a palace, quite, but still a mansion—and sees open doors. she straightens her shoulders. fearless, she thinks, and walks into this strange new world.

lumiere had been having quite an ordinary day. why, he had just been waltzing with plumette! and dimly he had known that belle was off, somewhere, looking at some books, but it didn’t have anything to do with him. he was too busy romancing his beloved in the beautiful French language.

so why, then, had he suddenly felt himself flying through the air, through a great whooshing—then through a brief sense of books, and belle screaming—and then suddenly, quite oddly, back to himself? for he was still quite himself—he had checked his hands, and they were the same hands, and he had moved his face, and it was the same face. but plumette wasn’t here anymore—and the palace wasn’t here anymore—and instead he was in a quiet room, with a couch and a couple chairs, and a balcony that looked out onto a patio.

He looked out and saw belle, far below. All right, then: they had just switched places, and now he was in the room, and she was in the garden, and this was all quite normal, if you ignored that belle was suddenly dressed in some of the most fascinating garments lumiere had ever seen, and plumette was nowhere in evidence, and sacre bleau what was he talking about this clearly wasn’t the palace anymore than he was a spaniard, he was crazy to think otherwise and if he ever got home—with belle in tow, with luck—they’d all have a lovely story to tell over a glass of wine.

but first, getting home. and to get home, he needed belle and her book-smarts. perhaps she would know a way out.

“Belle,” he started to call, and then stopped. He tried again—“Belle—oh, god”—no, something was quite wrong with his voice. He tried a sentence.

“Ma cherie, mon ami, what the hell,” he whispered. This was all quite strange. Somehow, his accent had wandered off without him—and left him the voice of a Scot.

“Belle?” Adam was in near-panic. Not about the whooshing, really, or the sudden change in clothes—lord knows he had enough experience with transformations to deal with whatever appearance the world wished to throw at him—but the sudden change of the world itself threw him for a loop. The palace turning dark, gloomy, tortured? Sure, he had experience with that. The castle turning into a stucco mansion surrounded by palm trees and large horseless carriages making a ghastly noise as they drove around the place? Not so expected.

He was in what he judged to be the front patio; tall iron fencing kept in the mansion, and the loud carriages were lined up in front of him in a sort of street. To his surprise, strange people were getting out of them, and looking at him, and calling him by some name.

“Dan! Dan!”

“It’s Adam,” he calls back, and for some reason the people laugh, and some get out small boxes, and many of the boxes start flashing at him. It’s like they’re trying to capture him with the lights. He flees into the mansion—better by far to be stuck indoors than here, with all these people looking at him and his face.

Belle is horrified. She came indoors to try to find a way out of this world, but instead it’s gotten weirder. There’s a red carpet lined out in this room, and drapes all around the walls, and there are hundreds of people in here, all calling her “Emma” and asking her about “wizards” and “movies” and “beauty and the beast.”  She understands that last part, a little bit, from something or other Mrs. Potts said once; but this is all different, all strange, and lights are going off everywhere and they still call “Emma, Emma!”

“I can’t—I’m not,” says Belle, and she edges her way over the carpet— “exclusive interview for Buzzfeed?”, yells somebody, and she covers her eyes—and somehow, somehow, makes it to the door on the other side.

Right into Lumiere’s arms.

“Lumiere! What are you doing here? Have you seen anybody else?”

“Have you seen my accent?” demands Lumiere, sounding extremely Scottish.

“Hey, it’s Obi-Wan!” yells one of the people with the flashing boxes.

“Fuck off,” says Lumiere, and yanks Belle out of the horrible room.

“I don’t know where that’s coming from, I don’t know where my accent’s gone, I haven’t got my mustache or my wig either, my French sounds horrible and I’m using Scottish words,” he cries in one long breath as soon as they’re alone. “Also everyone’s calling me Ewan or Obi-Wan and I’m fit to murder them. And someone asked about playing Lumiere? Playing Lumiere. As if I’m not 100% Lumiere all the fucking time—”

“Calm down,” says Belle, and she has to shake him a little bit. “You don’t sound French anymore, that’s true. Do I sound different?”

“No, you always sounded English. Why the fuck do I sound Scottish—”

“What do you mean, I always sounded English?!”

“How do you think I sound?” cries a voice behind them, and the two whip around to see Plumette.

“Plumette! Oh, Plumette,” and Lumiere runs to her and sweeps her up just as she lights up at the sight of his face. Belle looks away as they kiss.

“You sound English, mo ghràdh,” murmurs Lumiere, once he comes up for air.

“You sound delightfully Gaelic,” says Plumette, cooing in his arms.

“You both need to get your lives together and help me,” says Belle. “How many of us are there, running around like this, being called the wrong names and having the wrong voices and wearing these strange clothes?”

“What name have they been calling you?” asks Plumette. “They’ve been calling me Gugu. And I like the clothes, they’re so pretty—”

“—you look great in them, hen—”

“Get your lives together,” hisses Belle. “Do we have any clues as to where we are? They keep mentioning wizards to me. Maybe all those people pointing light-boxes at us are wizards, and they’ve brought us here for something?”

“What could they want from us?” Lumiere shrugs. “All I have to offer is myself. Though if they ask me about playing Lumiere one more time—”

“Oh, how odd, they asked me about playing a feather duster,” Plumette says. “I thought it was a joke.”

“They both asked you about—? Hold on.” Belle vanishes back into the room full of blazing lights. Lumiere and Plumette are left alone.

“I could get used to that accent.”

“Could you, luv? I could get used to you in those clothes—or, even better, out of them—”

Belle is back disappointingly soon.

“You’re both right; they asked me about playing Belle. Something odd is going on here. They’re treating us like we’re play-actors, or as if our actual selves were fictional—”

“Oh, thank god,” breathes a voice at the end of the corridor, and there’s Adam, coming in from outside. He hasn’t got a wig on, and he’s dressed in the same strange, casual style of the other men in this weird place, but he is still definitely Adam.

“Adam!”

“Belle!”

“You’re dressed all different—I like it—”

“I know, I know, but Adam, everyone’s treating us like we’re fiction, and calling us by the wrong names—”

“And they expect us to stand there and stare into the lights as they ‘take our picture,’ or whatever they’re shouting about—”

“They called Plumette Gugu—”

“We’re not in France anymore—oh, hello, Lumiere, where’s your ‘stache gone—”

“Oh Adam—”

“Ugh,” the two say together, in relief, “thank goodness you’re here.” 

“Get your lives together,” says Plumette.

Belle pulls away from Adam, though his hands still drape to her arms, steadying her and giving her hope. “Plumette’s right. We’ve got to find a way out of this. I got us into this mess, by opening up that old book, and now I have to get us out.”

“What was the book called?” says Adam. “’Don’t Touch Me, I’m Disgustingly Full of Magic’?”

“Maybe,” says Belle. “Though really, it was ‘Press Event for Beauty and the Beast, Los Angeles, April 2017.’ And something about coverage of the stars.”

“2017? That’s a long ways away,” says Adam. He frowns in concentration, and Belle could kiss him for his worry. He thinks, growling a little in the back of his throat.

“A press event sounds like something I used to do, occasionally, when my princely duties demanded I announce something important,” says Adam, finally. “So if this is one, that ‘beauty and the beast’ thing is what we’re announcing. It must be important.”

“I don’t know what I’ve done to earn the title of ‘beast,’“ says Lumiere, “but at least we can all concur that Plumette is involved, yes, because she is the beauty?”

Belle glares at him. Lumiere decides to check out the table full of snacks in the corner of the room.

“Beauty and the Beast—that sounds like a story,” whispers Belle. “Maybe that’s the story they think we’re acting!”

“Sounds accurate,” says Adam. “So they think we’re from that story. Maybe if we can find a copy of it, we can find our way back to our own palace, our own France!”

“Because the book marked ‘press event’ got us here, a book marked ‘Beauty and the Beast’ might get us out?”

“Exactly, darling. You’re inconceivably clever,” says Adam, and he could get lost staring at Belle’s bright face, but then a person with a flashing box comes in and starts clicking away at them again.

“Get out,” hisses Plumette, and she snatches away the box and chases off the intruder. She holds the strange thing as if it’s alien, and looks back at Belle and Adam. “So? You were saying?”

“Beauty and the Beast,” says Belle. “Find it, open it, pray it takes us home.”

The four make their way back into the red-carpeted room, and are immediately blinded by the flashing lights and the shouts.

“Ewan! Ewan! Here!”

“Hey Emma! Hermione! Over here!”

“Hollywood Reporter, hi Dan, can you—”

“Excuse me,” shouts Belle, over it all. “Excuse me. We have a quick announcement to make.”

The crowd shushes a little bit. Belle takes a deep breath.

“I know you’re all here today for ‘Beauty and the Beast,’“ she says, and the crowd cheers. “But we have a special favor to ask first. Do any of you, um, have a copy of it?”

A deadly silence. The crowd of press look at each other in confusion.

“Anything like it at all,” pleads Belle. “A book? A script?”

More silence. Oh no, oh no, think the foursome, we’re never getting home.

“I’m not sure why you want it,” says a voice, quite close at hand, “but would a copy of the songs work?”

“There you go, Alan Menken has it!”  shouts one of the reporters. An ordinary man places a large, white songbook—the words Beauty and the Beast beautifully inscribed on the top—into Belle’s hands. Before the crowd can blink, Adam is pulling them out of sight and behind the draped backdrops.

“Quickly now,” he murmurs, leaning over the book in Belle’s hands. “Open it, quick, and let’s hope we get home.”

Belle flings open its pages. They get one good look at the first page—Aria, says the sheet music—and then they’re flying again.

With a crash, they’re all back in the garden. No subtle resurfacing in tranquil bodies, this time; no, they all crash and roll and crumple onto the grass, Plumette’s heavy petticoats pressing into Adam’s face, Lumiere’s wig falling onto Belle’s ringed hand.

“We’re in our clothes again!” cries Plumette.

“We’re home again!” cries Adam.

“We’re ourselves again!” cries Belle.

“I can speak French again!” cries Lumiere. “Formidable, mes amis!”

They never speak of their strange excursion again. The book that started the mess is never found—they check the bookshelves, but it’s only medical manuals there now. The sheets of music titled Beauty and the Beast are placed in the care of Garderobe, who is delighted to be given songs written, seemingly, just for her. And Plumette, up in her room in the top of the palace, flicks and plays with the strange light-box she took from the intruder.

“Find anything, ma cherie?” says Lumiere. He has been using ten times as many French endearments around her since he got his own voice back.

“There isn’t anything here,” says Plumette, “though see—if I press here, this one picture shows on this screen. Remember? The interloper came in just as those two were lost in each other’s eyes. She must have captured them as they were.”

“Ah,” sighs Lumiere, “c’est l’amour.”

[note: not based AT ALL on any actual press event; imagined as an amalgamation of all those interviews/videos/publicity photos of the cast hanging around in fancy mansions getting photographed or taking buzzfeed quizzes or hyping up the movie for reporters. tbh i really just wanted to write a fic where lumiere is accidentally ewan for a day and HEY why not do this.]

[reactingtosomething]

Reacting to Wynonna Earp: Episodes 207-209

Eat All of His Organs, Widow Beth

The Setup: Miri and Kris adore Wynonna Earp, but are clearly not triple watching episodes enough, because we have a lot of questions about this chunk of season 2. We can all agree that Rosita is amazing, Tucker can choke, and people can make bad choices but still be loved.

Find our previous Wynonna Earp s2 reacting here, here, and here.

Spoilers through episode 209, “Forever Mine Nevermind,” below!

MIRI: Ok, I’m definitely going to screw up what happens in which episode a bit, but I’m ready when you are

KRIS: I mean there’s a lot and it’s kind of confusing

So I don’t think we need to worry about episode by episode so much

MIRI: Cool, then let’s dive in

Because shit is Happening

KRIS: Nicole Making Poor Choices

MIRI: Oh, Nicole

Very poor choices

We still love her

But maybe don’t keep things from adult people “for their own good” when they have specifically sought out that information

Especially RIGHT after Waverly spent weeks possessed and not fully in control of her own life/body/anything

KRIS: Also isn’t opening someone else’s mail a federal crime?

I mean details, details, but

MIRI: Yes

KRIS: N I C O L E

MIRI: Can we have a brief, happier sidebar to discuss Drunk Nicole?

KRIS: Um, yes

MIRI: Because that was a goddamn delight

“Like Christmas!”

KRIS: Such a hero, drinking for two

And being the worst liar

MIRI: SO BAD

Like, damn Nicole, maybe this is why Dolls won’t let you in BBD (not really)

Also, let us all remember the season one drunk Nicole gift that was “Your ass is great. Top shelf”

Waverley is also precious when drunk (obviously) and also makes bad choices

KRIS: Everyone needs drinking lessons from Rosita

MIRI: Everyone needs Rosita full stop

She’s great

I want her to be my friend

And I’m really digging the Waverly/Rosita friendship

KRIS: Yes

I wasn’t sure I totally bought Waverly’s initial resistance to the baby shower, but I liked Nicole sticking up for Rosita a lot as a fellow outsider

MIRI: That was a really lovely moment. And it’s so true--Waves and Wynonna are so used to it being Earps against the world that they forget they can actually be the impenetrable cool group to others

I mostly buy Waves as suspicious of a new person, especially as a Protective Sister thing since Rosita is with Doc, who is semi-Wynona’s ex

KRIS: I didn’t think we needed the quick beat of Nicole seeming a little jealous when she realized Wave and Rosita were getting along really well later

Especially since that scene was immediately about something else

MIRI: Also, Waverly can be a jealous person--remember she nearly shot Wynonna for hooking up with Champ in the pilot

Yeah, that Nicole beat didn’t totally work for me

I wonder if it was to set up (fear of) a reaction to the later Waverly/Rosita kiss?

KRIS: Oh man I almost forgot Trigger Happy Pilot Waverly

I guess in general I forget how trigger happy she is

It’s that whole Nicest Girl in Purgatory (Literally) thing

MIRI: She’s so much more level headed than Wynonna, you forget that that’s actually a super low bar

I have had a horrifying thought

KRIS: Go on

MIRI: Are we entirely clear on whether the Heir has to kill the 77 to break the curse, or if they have to kill all revenants?

Because until recently that has been the same thing

But now we (mostly) know that it’s not entirely

I mean, I don’t think Andras is actually setting it up so the Wynonna will have to kill Waverly and the baby

But I do wonder if they’re going to be forced to consider the possibility

KRIS: I can’t remember how they originally established the rules, and how the curse relates to the borders of the Triangle, but this solution of killing Clootie seems like it’s a possible shortcut

MIRI: Yeah, I think that’s going to be the ultimate endgame

But I do wonder how much angst is going to happen along the way

KRIS: I think the important reset is the 27th birthday of an Earp heir, as opposed to killing any particular number of revenants

MIRI: Or maybe it’s just that that’s how Wynonna gets the others on her side for this crazy ass plan--we can’t kill all revs, so we NEED to break the curse this way

KRIS: Like killing the 77 doesn’t end the curse, it just sends them to hell until the next heir comes of age

MIRI: No, I thought putting down all 77 within one heir’s lifespan (as heir) break the curse

KRIS: Oh

MIRI: That’s why they One Year Wonder was such a big deal--he came the closest

If all 77 aren’t killed, they come back the next time (which is what has always happened)

KRIS: This is actually a show where I think we could use more reminders about the rules of the world

I mean I know a lot of Earpers out there have seen every episode three times but still

MIRI: Especially as more are revealed

But I’m pretty sure about this one

KRIS: And does the Triangle predate the curse or is it related?

MIRI: That’s part of why Wynonna’s Resurrect the Demon plan is so bonkers--because it’s not the route to ending the curse she and every other heir has been pursuing all along, and that route does still exitst

I’m not sure!

I think it predated it, but I’m not sure if that’s been made explicit yet

Like, demonic things are clearly drawn there

It may have just been a convenient pre-existing boundary for the magic

KRIS: I wanted another beat somewhere of Wynonna actually making this choice

MIRI: Before she presents it to Doc?

KRIS: Yeah, it almost seems like she makes the decision within that conversation

The emotional beats in the last couple episodes have worked pretty well but plot points are feeling rushed

MIRI: Yeah, I wonder if they could have used one more episode

KRIS: And I realized reading some recaps that I don’t think we know who brought the Widows the head of Constance Clootie

MIRI: May be a feature of having to rewrite fairly late in the game re: Scofrano’s preganncy

I just saw a recap that said it was Tucker, but I definitely didn’t remember that

KRIS: See there also seems to be a lot happening off screen

And I definitely did not remember how we last left Constance

MIRI: Oh, I did because it was a pretty impressively vicious Doc moment--he left her buried to the neck in the salt flats

KRIS: Would Tucker have known where she was?

Is it too late in the season to introduce another villain?

MIRI: I don’t see how he would

Hmmmmmm

KRIS: I mean I guess it would have to be someone we know

MIRI: Oh, did you catch the Blacksmith in the teaser for next episode??

Because I did not but the internet did

KRIS: I don’t think teasers come attached to my iTunes pass

For some reason I thought she was dead

MIRI: She definitely was!

KRIS: Was it an implied offscreen death?

MIRI: Clootie zombified her, sent her after Waves and Doc and then Doc had to kill her

KRIS: Jesus this show clearly moves too fast for me

MIRI: You think you’re tracking it all, and then something reminds you and it’s like Shit! There is just so much

KRIS: How did you feel about the Creepy Murder Doll?

MIRI: I never need there to be Creepy Murder Dolls ever

But this one was used pretty well, if a bit rushed

KRIS: Apart from the Creepy Murder-iness of it all, it didn’t really work for me

MIRI: I liked the coming out of the painting detail, but plot-wise it was a little wonky

I guess it was supposed to be an illustration that even non-revenant evil is drawn to the Triangle and the ring, but it also looked like it was trying to be both an a story and like a c story

KRIS: The whole It Heightened Our Emotions thing was definitely too fast and convenient a realization, and also just didn’t seem necessary?

MIRI: agreed

Oh, that demon guy could be a final arc Big Bad for the season

(OH and Bobo is obviously coming back at some point. Duh. So much plot!)

KRIS: But we already have Bobo

MIRI: Maybe Bobo’s going to be on their side now

KRIS: Yeah, that seems right

MIRI: Can’t find the teaser, but re: the Blacksmith

KRIS: Oh wait to backtrack, Waverly and the baby wouldn’t fall under the curse because they weren’t shot by Peacemaker, right?

MIRI: I think so

BUT is that just the way they’ve discussed the curse because that was the only type of revenant around until now?

KRIS: I feel like that’s one of the early mythology things they did hammer again recently, in the dream episode

MIRI: And I think they play a little fast and loose with that rule--wasn’t there a Rev in the first season that was dead because of Wyatt, but who wasn’t actually shot by Peacemaker?

That is a good point

So Tucker calls Waverly his angel too

KRIS: #NOPE

MIRI: That makes 3 people in her life

I mean yes, obviously a hard #NOPE to everything about him

KRIS:  Eat all of his organs, Widow Beth

MIRI: And I love that Andras is very specific that he’s “The all-too human villain all women have met”

I am glad he’s Widow food now

KRIS: Yeah, she talks about that in the featurette too

MIRI: Yes! Very effectively

But I want to talk about Waverly and this angel thing

KRIS: OK

MIRI: I don’t actually have anything good to say

I’m just super intrigued by it

I can see her mom and Bobo both calling her that being related, but why Tucker too??

KRIS: Hm

Maybe something he overheard when they were kids?

I don’t remember when mom died

MIRI: That could be

Mom didn't necessarily die

She left

KRIS: God dammit self

MIRI: Well they keep it ambiguous in the beginning

KRIS: So I guess Waverly’s (Wynonna-assigned) call sign when the team was on walkies a little while ago was Angel Pants?

MIRI: Was it??

KRIS: wynonna-earp-episode-206-recap-beaver-buzz-387166

I kind of buy it as just a thing people have always called her

Which if nothing else sets up an interesting contrast to maybe probably being half-demon

And possibly Waverly having a Hulk-out moment later, either tragic or cathartic

MIRI: I like that

Plus if Wynonna picked it up early from heir mom, others could have picked it up from Wynonna

KRIS: Tied up in this whole “Everyone loves Waverly”/“Waverly never gets to take care of herself” thing

MIRI: Ooh, a Waverly hulk out moment would be interesting!!!

I wonder what a half revenant will look like

KRIS: (which is a theme drawn out really well in these autostraddle recaps as opposed to something I thought about All By Myself)

MIRI: Oh yeah, Valerie Anne’s recaps are amazing and everyone should read them

She’s also pretty delightful on twitter

KRIS: Yeah

2h2 hours ago

MIRI: Oh no

why

That hurts me

KRIS: That was a super mean text, Waverly

MIRI: It was

It was bad and mean and Nicole didn’t deserve it, even if she was very much in the wrong for the whole DNA test thing

KRIS: I still haven’t decided if I totally buy it as something Nicole would do

MIRI: I think Nicole would do a lot of stupid things to save Waverly pain

I am glad they’re playing it out as a legitimate fight -- Waverly’s whole “I don’t hate her! We’re in a fight” thing in the opening played nicely

KRIS: Yeah, I do like that

MIRI: Parts of the internet are Very Angry about the Waverly/Rosita kiss

KRIS: I try to stay out of Earper Tumblr on Friday nights so I don’t see spoilers since I’m not watching live, but I’m vaguely aware

I mean

MIRI: I’ve mostly just seen reactions to those reactions on twitter

K: Oops I did mean Twitter

KRIS: I am in zero ways in a position to tell people how to feel about it, first of all

But from that unqualified POV, it seemed pretty quickly resolved within  the episode as a thing that just happened and isn’t necessarily going to be a problem

MIRI: I have a slightly more qualified POV and I totally agree. They’re both feeling unsure about the world and seen in a way they normally aren’t and make a 12 second mistake, and then both immediately call it out as a mistake

I don’t think it perpetuates stereotypes of bi characters being slutty (which I’m pretty damn sensitive to) and I think the clear return to the friendship dynamic at the end says a lot

KRIS: And just from a story-mechanical perspective I don’t see any room for it to Become a Thing

Though if there is a show whose pacing can prove me wrong it’s this one

(Maybe also Jane the Virgin, which I’m way behind on)

MIRI: (I’m an entire season behind!)

KRIS: (Me too! Plus the last third or so of season 2)

MIRI: (Tv always happens so much these days)

Sounds like our official perspective is: People have a right to feel their feelings, but we really don’t think it’s going to be A Thing. Yes?

KRIS: Yeah

I guess I also get people having their guard up post-Supergirl-at-SDCC fallout

which we don’t have to get into

MIRI: Fair and agreed

KRIS: We can’t leave without acknowledging Jeremy

MIRI: I LOVE JEREMY

KRIS: And also Dolls nerding out about meeting that ghost Marshal

“Once, he had to arrest his own son for murder.”

MIRI: I’m so pleased with the addition of both him and Rosita this season

Nerdy Dolls is great

Dolls was great in this whole run--I like him figuring out who he is outside of

Black Badge and getting to be a little freer with his emotions

But still Very Dolls

KRIS: I still want him to burn more things but I liked his little hero moments in the dream episode

MIRI: Yeah

KRIS: I’m not a pyromaniac in general, readers, I promise

M: Are we sure?

MIRI: I think they’re saving up the burning for the last episode or two

Don’t want to overplay that card

OMG because it was the first in this super dense string of episodes, we have not yet discussed the fact that the Revenant bar is called Pussywillows

KRIS: And that it was briefly Wynonna’s place of employment

MIRI: Shit, I completely forgot about that!

I wonder what happened to the normal, pre-Wynona’s 27th birthday Pussywillow clientele?

KRIS: Seemed like at least a few of them were still there

I’ve been into this idea that a lot of the revenants just want to blend in

MIRI: What is the impact of the periodic revenant reawakening on Purgatory’s employment statistics?

Yeah, I am increasingly intrigued by non-evil Revs

Like Rosita

Just trying to live their damn un-lives

KRIS: It also puts Wyatt in an interesting light

MIRI: The fact that he clearly killed some non-villainous people?

Yeah

Because there can only be so many like Robert/Bobo who were used as human shields

Also the fact that he was willing to do that to Robert

KRIS: It’s also probably a shot Doc wouldn’t have needed

MIRI: Ooh, that’s a fun point

KRIS: And it doesn’t sound like he was there, unless I missed yet another thing, which wouldn’t surprise me

MIRI: No, I think you’re right

He refused to go because Purgatory was a lost cause

KRIS: Was that episode the first we’d heard about Demon Clootie being the sheriff?

MIRI: I think so

KRIS: I assumed I’d just forgotten

MIRI: I may have to, but I think it was the reveal

KRIS: Right

MIRI: And the widows being his wives

KRIS: Yeah that for sure

MIRI: And Constance’s siter wives

*sister

I wonder if they were demons already or if he made them demons?

ALSO MERCEDES IS STILL ALIVE AND FACELESS AND NO THANK YOU

KRIS: I think I’m still confused about Constance’s agenda at any given point

She’s both anti-Earp and afraid of her husband?

MIRI: I think in general she wants power and her sons and revenge. Beyond that I got nothing

Yeah, I think so

She seems to really want autonomy

So when allies like Bobo try to strip that, she gets PISSED and acts out

KRIS: I wonder if Mercedes gets her face back

MIRI: I really hope she does

KRIS: She and Rosita would be friends

MIRI: Because I liked real Mercedes

YEs!

And I liked her dynamic with Wynonna a lot

KRIS: Yeah!

MIRI: Do you feel like Widow Beth is hungry more often than Widow Mercedes?

KRIS: I don’t know

MIRI: Also, I know they refer to them as each other’s sisters, but do we think they actually are/were, or just sister-wives?

KRIS: She definitely seems to have more sass

Hmm

MIRI: I feel like it’s always WBeth who is bitching about needing to feed, or feeding on a priest/Juan Carlo/Tucker

KRIS: I guess I’m still assuming they’re sisters

MIRI: It probably doesn’t matter, I’m just intrigued

KRIS: I feel like there might have been more of a power struggle triangle [with Constance, in the past, I meant] if they weren’t

MIRI: Hmmm

Agreed. They definitely seem to be unravelling now, though.

KRIS: Also, whoever the fuck was responsible for this crate over the years

You could have done better, dude(s)

MIRI: Right!?

Even if they didn’t want to risk them escaping during some sort of transfer--build a box around the box!

KRIS: Sidebar, Constance really seems to like her claustrophobic tortures

MIRI: Ooh, good point

I hope she never tortures me

KRIS: At least don’t leave the box just in a giant warehouse with a bunch of other, less important boxes

Surround it with a circle of salt or whatever

I don’t know

MIRI: Seriously. Put the box in a metal box surrounded by salt and bury it or something

I really judge BBD’s policies

like across the board

KRIS: Not great, guys, not great

Nicole is better off, maybe

MIRI: Maybe focus a little less on Coolness Points and a little more on follow-through

Yeah, do we think Waverly saves her from Widow Mercedes, Waverly calls in the troops, or Nicole saves herself?

KRIS: I think A or C, unless Dolls had a way to tail Widow Mercedes

I guess I’m leaning toward some form of A

MIRI: A big, dramatic, Save the Girl scene would be nice for them this season

KRIS: I would like to see C but I don’t know how killable the Widows are

MIRI: Tie up a few threads

KRIS: without something like Peacemaker

MIRI: Yeah, that’s very true

I could see her outwitting WMercedes since she’s weak/semi-powerless right now

But yeah, I think Waves helps

Oh, quick shout out to the physical comedy skills of all three guys when they were bound together

KRIS: Yeah

I have one last thing and it’s not that long but it’s Political

Do you have anything else?

MIRI: No--I know there’s so much more but I’m tapped out for the moment. Is it going to be about abortion?

KRIS: Yes

MIRI: Proceed

KRIS: I mean there’s not much to it, just

Wynonna for sure seems like someone who’d put it on the table

MIRI: And that moment in the doctor’s office where the OB shows her the sonogram and she freaks out plays very oddly

to me

KRIS: YES

That is a strange scene

and I don’t think entirely deliberately

I am well aware that the ultrasound move is right out of the anti-abortion handbook, but this didn’t seem like the point of the scene or the character

MIRI: Agreed

Yeah, much as I like the pregnancy storyline, I think a quick exchange between Wynonna and Waverly or Wynonna and the OB addressing that she knows it’s an option and she’s not doing it would have been better

I thiiiiiink the time jump may have been supposed to make us stop asking these questions?

Like, gotten her to the point where she’s pretty far along

KRIS: It feels a little churlish to like, ask Wynonna Earp the show to check one more Feminist Bona Fides box

But it wouldn’t have even been unprecedented

In the last year or so

You’re the Worst

Crazy Ex

I feel like at least one more I’m forgetting

MIRI: Hmmmm, if there is I’m blanking too

M: Jane the Virgin (not sure if it was this season or last season)

KRIS: I don’t know, it still feels out of character

MIRI: Yeah. I think a discussion would have worked better

M: I am genuinely sorry about this one. I couldn’t help myself. This time, you all have permission to @ me, I deserve it.

KRIS: I have stronger feelings about this than most men probably, but I can be done

I’m done

MIRI: You don’t have to be

KRIS: I guess that’s really it

Oh The Magicians

MIRI: I wonder if they didn’t think they had time to go into it effectively, so decided no doing so at all was best?

KRIS: They went there in the spring

In a crazy dark fantasy way

I mean

MIRI: I really need to watch that show

KRIS: Just like, a couple of lines

MIRI: I agree

KRIS: Wynonna I mean

I don’t want to seem like I’m saying there’s A Type of Woman who chooses abortion

MIRI: No, but there can be a discussion of abortion without her choosing it

KRIS: But Wynonna is a person who is especially and understandably sensitive about her autonomy

So that it doesn’t come up at all just didn’t ring true for me

MIRI: Agreed. I think her choosing to keep the baby makes perfect sense (she clings to what little family she has like nobody’s business) but I think the conversation would have been had

KRIS: Okay I’m really done

I’m not Mad

M: He’s just disappointed

MIRI: I have to wonder if there was a network note, or if they really did think the time jump invalidated the question

I know you’re not

Neither am I

We can love 96% of this season and still have thoughts on it

KRIS: The Magicians went pretttty far and it’s a network sibling so I doubt it was a note issue

MIRI: Fair

Syfy doesn’t strike me as too squeamish

KRIS: Three episodes left or four?

MIRI: I believe it’s three

Do we think the baby is born this season, and do we think Demon Clootie rises this season?

KRIS: I would have definitely said yes to both until you put them in one sentence

That’s a lot of Story

MIRI: hahaha

KRIS: I guess he could rise without them killing him

MIRI: Yeah, I can see them ending on the seal breaking, or something along those lines

Like last season they showed Waverley’s demon eyes

KRIS: Hm, yeah

M: We didn’t touch on this OR Wynonna’s throw pillow situation and for that I am very, very sorry. Also Waverly fighting and being sexy.

K: A day may come when I will be comfortable being the first one to bring up a woman’s attractiveness without worrying that it makes me a bad feminist, but it is not this day.

M: I do still worry about it too, but apparently not enough to stop myself.

Sorry we never touched on your agelessness, Doc

MIRI: Oh, real quick--I like that they’re both pretty in the right in that argument!

KRIS: Yeah, see, that argument would have totally worked for me without The Doll Made Us Do It

I didn’t need it walked back at all

MIRI: I know

KRIS: It was great

MIRI: I did like the “I mean it was all true, I just wouldn’t have said it” beat

KRIS: E X T R A creepy life sized doll, though, well done (?)

MIRI: But I think the emotional heights all work without Demon Doll and they should have just gone for it

Yeah, I did like the painting to creepy painting to doll to GIANT doll thing

KRIS: Just the exact right amount of TOO FAR, ANDRAS for the week

MIRI: Truly

I think that storyline would have worked better as a c story to another episode

KRIS: Jeremy vs Demon Doll

MIRI: OR maybe the doll didn’t have an emotional effect, it was just murderous.

And they didn’t have time for filters as they argued because they were fight a doll

Omg, not, that’s way better. Jeremy vs the Demon Doll all the way

I really love him a lot

KRIS: STAY IN THE CAR JEREMY

I KNOW YOU’RE GENRE SAVVY ENOUGH

We’ll be back for the season 2 finale!

[ao3feed-ineffablehusbandz]

Before The Beginning

by phlintandsteel

"Do you think of me, while you're out building stars?"

A flutter of wings.

A whisper in the spaces between their atoms.

Red hair lit up like its own halo, like Raphael is twice as holy, twice as important as any other angel.

And he is...

He is.

"Every moment, angel."

Words: 7193, Chapters: 1/1, Language: English

Fandoms: Good Omens (TV), Good Omens - Neil Gaiman & Terry Pratchett

Rating: Not Rated

Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply

Categories: M/M, Other

Characters: Aziraphale, Crowley, Gabriel, Beelzebub, Dagon, God, Lucifer, Death - Character

Relationships: Aziraphale/Crowley (Good Omens)

Additional Tags: Crowley-as-Raphael, Aziraphale-as-Jehoel, ineffable husbands, playing fast and loose with angelic mythology here, from beginning to end and back again, Angst, falling, the ineffable plan, Aziraphale is a badass, Crowley questions, but it all works out

source http://archiveofourown.org/works/19507780

[ao3feed-crowley]

Before The Beginning

read it on the AO3 at https://ift.tt/2LF1K18

by phlintandsteel

"Do you think of me, while you're out building stars?"

A flutter of wings.

A whisper in the spaces between their atoms.

Red hair lit up like its own halo, like Raphael is twice as holy, twice as important as any other angel.

And he is...

He is.

"Every moment, angel."

Words: 7193, Chapters: 1/1, Language: English

Fandoms: Good Omens (TV), Good Omens - Neil Gaiman & Terry Pratchett

Rating: Not Rated

Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply

Categories: M/M, Other

Characters: Aziraphale, Crowley, Gabriel, Beelzebub, Dagon, God, Lucifer, Death - Character

Relationships: Aziraphale/Crowley (Good Omens)

Additional Tags: Crowley-as-Raphael, Aziraphale-as-Jehoel, ineffable husbands, playing fast and loose with angelic mythology here, from beginning to end and back again, Angst, falling, the ineffable plan, Aziraphale is a badass, Crowley questions, but it all works out

read it on the AO3 at https://ift.tt/2LF1K18

[sensitivefern]

‘Most mushroom poisonings happen to the mushroom hunter who relies on myths’... the cap on a mushroom is called a pileus, named after hats worn by some ancient Romans...

===

About your neck you will want to wear a silk kerchief. This is to keep out dust, and to prevent your neck from becoming reddened and chapped. It... should be of the best quality. The poorer grades go to pieces soon, and their colors are not fast. Get it big enough. At night you will make a cap of it to sleep in; and if ever you happen to be caught without extra clothes where it is very cold, you will find that the kerchief tied around your middle, and next the skin, will help surprisingly.

A coat is useless absolutely. A sweater is better as far as warmth goes; a waistcoat beats it for pockets. You will not wear it during the day; it wads up too much to be of much use at night. Even your trousers rolled up make a better temporary pillow. Leave it home; and you will neither regret it nor miss it.

[Stewart Edward White, Camp and Trail]

===

Some time before most of [the] reviews had appeared, the most interesting criticism of all had been published. It was printed in The Brooklyn Times of September 29, 1855, and was written by the man who best understood the purposes of the poems and was not unaware of their faults and probable reaction of the public. The author was Walt himself:

‘Very devilish to some, and very divine to some, will appear the poet of these new poems... an attempt, as they are of a naïve, masculine, affectionate, contemplative, sensual, imperious person to cast into literature not only his own grit and arrogance, but his own flesh and form, undraped... the begetter of a new offspring out of literature... preferring always to speak for himself rather than have others speak for him’.

And so he does, and very modestly for a Whitman who from now on proposes to fight the world until it accepts his poems.

[Henry Seidel Canby]

===

Former circus magician Timothy Drew... operated the ‘Moorish American Science Temple’, with fez-clad disciples in Newark, Pittsburgh, Detroit, and Chicago. Drew, who taught that black Americans were actually Moors from Morocco, foresaw ‘the inevitable destruction of the white or European rule, of which the sign from heaven would be a star with a crescent moon’. His movement would become the Nation of Islam.

[1920]

===

This is Exodus, a wholly uncomprehended book. In proof thereof let us quote from one of our professors of ‘Biblical Literature and Religion’. ‘The culminating incidents of the Exodus was the crossing of the Red Sea. That this was accomplished miraculously, is a matter of clear history’. And what is this ‘clear history?’ The Bible, of course, three times over. ‘The record furnishes us with the facts in triplicate narrative’. Therefore it must be true. But to continue: ‘True there is the admission that, up to the present time no direct reference to the Exodus has been found among the Egyptian inscriptions’. And then follows the credulous reason: ‘Such silence causes no surprise; it is the expected silence of a proud and contemptuous people regarding an event of humiliating circumstances’. This represents modern enlightenment concerning Causation, Truth and Reality, and then we wonder what’s wrong with us morally. Morals, like faith, are the evidence of things not seen, namely, consciousness, enlightenment, wisdom. These our spiritual leaders cannot give us, because they haven’t them to give. Our rabbis, priests and ministers are but ‘innocents abroad’ in an occult world. The scriptures are to them as the Egyptian hieroglyphics before the Rosetta Stone.

There is no end to the explanations these apologists find to prove the historicity of Hebrew mythology; they must prove it lest their own house of cards come tumbling down.

[Deceptions and Myths of the Bible]

===

...I returned to Baltimore, and before leaving the Smart Set office gathered up an armful of review books to examine on the train. Among them was a set of proofs from Harcourt, Brace & Company. Ordinarily, I refused to read books in proof, for handling the loose sheets was an unpleasant chore, but this time, on a sudden and aberrant impulse, I took up the sheaf as soon as the train plunged into the Pennsylvania tunnel. By the time it got to Newark I was interested, and by the time it got to Trenton I was fascinated. At Philadelphia I called a Western Union boy and sent a telegram to Nathan. I forget the exact text, but it read substantially: ‘That idiot has written a masterpiece’. The book was Main Street.

[H.L. Mencken, My Life as Author and Editor]

===

❚NASA's Cassini Begins Its Final Mission Before Self-Destruction

Start mixing your Arnold Palmers, it's time for The Masters.

Sweating, Shaking Pharmaceutical CEO Says He Can Stop Profiting Off Opioid Epidemic Anytime He Wants

Global Meat News is another one of those industry newsletters I follow closely.

At 73, Barry Manilow comes out of closet

White supremacist Bannon removed from National Security Council

Wingnut: God Will Curse Children and Grandchildren of Trump Critics

Fascist former Maricopa County, Arizona Sheriff Joe Arpaio’s infamous tent city jail is being shut down by his successor after a commission recommended that it be closed. Arpaio, of course, blames it all on George Soros, presumably because Saul Alinsky is dead and Karl Marx isn’t returning his calls.

This Farthead Wants to Rename the St. Louis Zoo 'The Midwest Abortion Sanctuary City Zoological Park' Can you imagine hating something so much that you think, our only option is to involve the zoo animals? I understand that zoo animals don’t care about politics because they don’t understand them. I also can infer that they wouldn’t care even if they could understand them, because zoo animals are prisoners without rights or the hope of parole. But Missouri State Sen. Bob Ond...

Rose Hamlin, a One-Hit Wonder With ‘Angel Baby,’ Dies at 71 Ms. Hamlin’s group, Rosie and the Originals, had only one Top 40 hit, but it was a memorable one. A bittersweet song of teenage love recorded in a converted airline hangar in 1960, “Angel Baby” reached No. 5 on the Billboard singles chart in January 1961 and remains a mainstay of oldies radio. John Lennon was one of the song’s biggest fans. He recorded it in 1973 at the sessions for his album “Rock ’n’ Roll,” although it was not released until 1986, on the album “Menlove Ave.” His recording begins with a spoken introduction: “This here is one of my all-time favorite songs. Send my love to Rosie, wherever she may be.”

HARRISBURG, Pa. — A Penn State University trustee who said he was “running out of sympathy” for people he described as “so-called victims” of Jerry Sandusky is no longer seeking a second term on the board.

Outing mit 73... Barry Manilow spricht über sein Schwulsein

YouTube is launching a streaming TV service Wednesday. It's one of many — Sling, PlayStation Vue and local cable companies among them. But Google-owned YouTube TV offers several features the others don't. They include a cloud-based DVR with no storage limits, allowing users to record as many shows as they want for later playback. Membership also gives access to original series and movies featured on its other subscription streaming service, YouTube Red. And customers can create up to six accounts on one membership, with up to three streams running at once. A subscription costs $...

Helsingborg in southern Sweden is set to become the home of a museum dedicated to some of the biggest flop products of all time, including the Betamax player, the Harley Davidson perfume and an ill-advised "female" pen.

If a prime minister wants to truly unite a nation – one way not to do it is to cook a pizza with spaghetti topping. This seems to be the lesson that New Zealand’s leader, Bill English, can take away after he dabbled in the kitchen and sprinkled his result on social media this week. On Tuesday night English cooked dinner for his family – a 1980s rural Kiwi classic: tinned spaghetti and pineapple pizza. Later, he posted a series of photos of his home-spun efforts on Facebook. The photographs, blurry and un-retouched, caused a culinary uproar on Facebook and Twitter, with some Kiwis declaring they couldn’t vote for a prime minister who so wantonly bastardised Italian cuisine.

DID YOU KNOW THERE HAS NEVER BEEN A REPORTED DEATH LINKED TO THE OVERDOSING OF MARIJUANA?

Adorable CAT Plays with COW