#plathintro

[wallsofspeight-blog]

I’m sorry if this seems rushed, It’s mainly because I didn’t have a lot of time typing it at the library. I wrote most of it down last night, but didn’t finish it until 13 minutes before the library closes.

Have you seen WALLY SPEIGHT around campus? He’s TWENTY FOUR years old and the YOUTH CERTIFIED PEER SUPPORT SPECIALIST on campus. I’ve heard that he started working here because HE WANTED TO HELP OTHER YOUTH’S WITH BEHAVIORAL AND EMOTIONAL CHALLENGES AFTER HIS MENTAL HEALTH RELAPSE, when in reality it’s probably rumor. If you look at them closely they kinda resemble SEAN MCLOUGHLIN, but maybe my eyes are just playing tricks on me.

Personality:

Wally cares about youth dealing things similar to what he has and tries to show them the understanding and compassion that wasn’t shown to him.

His goal isn’t to “fix” or “counsel” anyone it’s to support. If a youth needs someone who’s had personal experience with a situation and needs someone listen he will and he’ll try use his experiences and how he overcame them to the best of his ability to help them not have to navigate theirs on their own.

He’s had to learn how to develop a thick skin when it comes to insults and rude disrespectful behavior, he tries to let things roll off his back.

He struggles with intense and highly changeable moods, with each episode lasting from a few hours to a few days.

Though he tries to be patient he still struggles with managing  Inappropriate and intense anger, and sometimes he needs to just walk away and spend time alone and in his own little world to regain the energy he needs to keep cool if the situation arises.

He’s blunt and doesn’t sugar coat things. He tries to be as straight forward with people as possible and sometimes what he means to say comes out harsher than intended. 

Background:

Wally is born in a small city on the coast of Georgia in 1993. 

Wally’s raised by his mother and biological father’s twin brother. They aren’t in a romantic relationship they just get a long well and decided to help each other in raising Wally. Though Wally did grow up seeing his uncle as his dad. Though they weren’t together, they were still both very much his parents.

(ages 3-12) They live in a fairly large double wide 3 bedroom mobile home. The mobile home park is very well kept up and Wally attends a private Baptist school that his mom even converted from Catholicism for.

Wally himself was treated very well for most of his childhood. His dad was very protective and attentive even though it sometimes didn’t feel right to be called his “baby girl”, the only issue was, was that his mom was a tad distant. She wasn’t outright hateful or abusive, just distant. Sometimes Nathan wondered if she really loved him, or just saw him as the reason her life was permanently put on hold.

 His “parents” as he refers to them, on the other hand fought often. Not constantly, but often and when they did the fights were so heated that Wally would get terrified and step in between them trying to get them to stop. When his parents started talking to him about getting separate homes he would start to cry and scream hoping that would be enough to keep his family together.  It wasn’t the same as a divorce, but in his eyes it was. In a way his parents still wouldn’t be living together anymore. Their family would fall apart and it was his job to keep them together if they weren’t gonna fucking try. 

Though his parents were extremely codependent on one another, Wally blamed himself when his parent’s friendship grew much volatile and borderline abusive. 

Wally had always had a closer relationship with his father rather than his mother and she resented this. She viewed this as Wally taking his side and in her eyes he didn’t deserve that kind of love and devotion. So in an attempt to punish her husband she started to try and manipulate Wally by making him feel guilty for loving his father. Telling him that “a daughter is always supposed to take her mother’s side” and “he’s mean and he hurts me, how can you love someone like that?” In moments like those Wally wasn’t her child, but her pawn. A way to win this war with her closest friend and take away the thing he loves the most by making him think they hate him. 

(age 13) Her manipulation worked and Wally caved, taking his mother’s side in the arguments because that’s what good children do. The more Wally took her side the more his father was pushed away, to the point where he just decided to leave one day and never turn back. That wasn’t enough for his mother no she then had to constantly throw in Wally’s face the fact that she knows that he still loves his father no matter how loud Wally claimed the contrary. To this day Wally feels like his father left him because he grew tired of him taking his mother’s side and just stopped loving him, maybe even started hating him. He feels that his father leaving was his fault, but secretly he also resents his mother for what he could now see as her using him as a means to an end. 

After leaving the home all the ire that Wally’s mother directed at his father was then directed towards him. One minute she could be kind and loving and the next she would become verbally abusive. She never hit him, but she tore him to shreds emotionally and he never knew what would set her off and nothing he would say could calm her.

There were times that she would force him to stay up and spend the next 20-something hours berating and punishing him for some imagined slight. Crying would make things worse so eventually he just learned to stare at the wall above her head and just mentally go somewhere else. 

Since they lost half of their income and most the two’s income came from his mother balancing a night time waitressing job and working as a daycare assistant the family had to downsize from their 3 bedroom mobile home to a two bedroom one bath.The strain caused his mother’s anger to grow and she started to become depressed, and during this time his mother’s abuse of Wally continued.  

Wally felt his life was in a constant state of chaos and at 13 for the first time seriously contemplated suicide. He felt like such a burden and that something was just so inherently wrong with him that his family’s lives would be easier without him messing it up. Maybe his mom will get happier and she could actually have a life rather than being dragged down by being raised by him, and to be honest on what he viewed to be a completely selfish level he just wanted to go to sleep and not wake up.

. He never told anyone about these feeling so while his mother and brother were receiving counseling Wally just allowed these feelings to build up. He felt his problems were minor compared to what others could be dealing with and honestly he didn’t like acknowledging and dealing with his harder emotions, so he learned to just shove everything down so he didn’t have to deal with or in his mind feel it. He could just pretend it wasn’t there.

Wally’s mother’s psychiatrist was very dedicated and helped Wally’s mother find a mobile home in a cheap mobile home “park” that was basically just a dirt road lined with a few mobile homes. Their new situation did not make Wally’s mother any happier. She had clinical depression and was denying and pushing away any and all attempts to help her.She started talking to Wally constantly about how she wanted to take her own life, she had even told him about the notebook where she was writing her final wishes. She would tell him that everyone would be surprised when it would happen and these conversations would cause Wally to go into his new room and cry himself to sleep.

(age 14) One day while Wally was walking into the mobile home park after getting off the bus he saw his mother’s psychiatrist was on the phone pacing in front of his home. He already knew what had happened and was just thinking of turning around and sneaking off when the doctor turned around and saw him walking down the dirt path. He shut the phone and met Wally halfway to tell Nathan what he already knew. Wally was angry. He was so angry at this doctor for not helping his mom and at himself for making things harder on her. 

Wally was sent to a group home where he stayed for about 2 months having frequent visits with his mom after she was released from the hospital. Though he had these visits at the end of the day he still had to go back to the room he shared with the other “girls” and sleep and deal with the emotions from her abuse, manipulation, both her and his father’s perceived abandonment, and his placement into foster care on his own.

In his new situation instead of dealing with it, in true Wally fashion, he started to act out. He would try to garner as much attention as possible by being loud, obnoxious, and disrespectful. If he was angry he’d express it in a very passive aggressive manner like refusing to comply reasonable staff requests, performing actions to deliberately annoy others, being easily annoyed and blaming others for his mistakes.  He regularly acted in what has been described as non compliant or headstrong manner.

(age 15) Being in the transitional cottage Wally was eventually sent to a therapeutic foster home. Wally didn’t want to let this new family in. They were being so nice and he didn’t know how to take that and he didn’t know how to handle the stability. He had his own room, an actual bed, regular meals, things that were meant to be his and his alone. He was used to chaos, not this. So he started to lash out worse than before.

He would explode over the tiniest of disagreements, no attempts at any kind of discipline would work because eventually he would just do what he wanted to anyway. If he was grounded from TV, he just go into the living room and turn it on regardless.

Not having dealt with the prolonged trauma of verbal and mental abuse as well as having his life changed around all of a sudden all the emotions he was bottling up started to boil over. He would get trapped in endless loops of negative thoughts. Just small talk of suicide or suicidal ideations would have him what he would call emotionally paralyzed, men yelling or older women sounding distressed would cause him to have what he wouldn’t consider to be flashbacks, but something close.

His anxiety grew worse making it hard for him to function in social situations or prioritize tasks without getting overwhelmed.

He had what his doctor’s would soon call a distorted and unstable self-image or sense of himself.

He learned about the term transgender from a book about gender and sexuality he plucked off the shelf at his school library. The definition fit him, kinda, only not really because sometimes he felt like a girl, but most of the time he was a boy, then other times neither gender really worked for him, but before he could go any further he needed to stop himself because those feelings of confusion started to rise and he needed to push them back down. Or at least he tried to, but with how much he was trying shove down things were starting to spill over.

 He didn’t want to let anyone in enough to help him deal with these issues and even if he did in the moment no amount of talking would help him through it so he turned to something that he had very little knowledge of, but hear through another kid at his former group home that worked for them which self-harm.

His foster mother and case manager found out and instead of treating him with compassion they shamed him. Called him foolish, stupid, and selfish. Threatened him with hospitalization and somehow made the act of documenting the injuries for his file feel shameful. 

In hindsight he thinks they did this in hopes it would get him to stop, when in reality all it did was fuel his negative emotions and teach him to hide it better.

After this incident they started taking him to therapists and psychiatrists. Giving him different diagnoses and medications. None really working.

(age 17) As he grew further into his teen years he started engaging in impulsive and often dangerous behaviors. He would drive recklessly. He would go over the speed limit, he started having periods of binge drinking. It was this that finally sent things over the edge and he was removed from the home and sent to a long term residential treatment program for six months before being sent to a group home in middle Georgia.

He spends the rest of his junior year of high school attending the on site classes before being allowed back into the public school system. He graduates his Senior year with other teens his age in a regular public school and goes on to study at Savannah Tech to study Information Technology.

He’s enrolled in this Mental Health Community Group for Youth between the ages of 18-26.

(age 18) He starts looking through the internet on break from some research for an assignment for his Intro to Psychology course did he actually find something that actually made some sense. He was looking through LGBT resources trying to learn more about asexuality. He kinda always thought of himself as bisexual and had accepted that a lot better understanding of that than his gender but after actually being in a few relationships he had the capacity to love someone but not be attracted physically to someone. 

As he was going through those resources he saw one mentioning the term non binary. Never having heard that term, but always being someone willing to learn something new he clicked on it. The definition kinda worked for what he felt. He wasn’t fully a boy or a girl so he didn’t fit into the binary. Deciding to look into it a bit more he learned that there were different non binary identities one of which being genderfluid.  The terms genderfluid fit him best. It fit how he would describe his gender, not strictly a man, not strictly a woman, but often moving along the spectrum.  This was something that he liked and could accept. It made sense of something that he had been ignoring for years.

(age 19)  He graduates Savannah Tech with a information technology associate of science degree, and starts seeing actual progress in his recovery.

(age 20) He’s doing better but he’s still struggling. He still has episodes of depression, still struggles with  self-harm, He tends to make frantic efforts to avoid real or imagined abandonment, like protecting himself from people who might abandon him by never even putting himself out there and isolating himself. His few relationships were intense and unstable  often swinging from extreme closeness and love to extreme dislike or anger. To him it feels as if he’s never going to be normal and dear god why for once can’t he just be normal.

(age 21) He stops seeing his therapist and doctor because really he’s not getting better and he’s really not seeing the point anymore. He’s lost medicaid anyway so it’s not like he could afford it if he was.

(age 21) After a really bad break down a close friend from group convinced him to check himself into a crisis stabilization center, the doctors there look at his symptoms and behavior and think that maybe Wally’s original doctors have been focusing on the wrong thing. That maybe they should treat him as though he has borderline personality disorder on top of his chronic PTSD and generalized anxiety.

(age 22) over the next year this decision and the change in his treatment it has brought with has shown actual progress in his recovery. Thanks to the addition of  Dialectical Behavior Therapy, and  Schema-Focused Therapy to his treatment plan.

(age 23) he takes and passes the training to become a Youth Certified Peer Support Specialist and spends the next year volunteering with the Youth Peer Support group, before taking a job as a CPS-Y at Plath academy.

[trinitegutierrez-blog]

its late and im tired but consider this a half - ass intro !!

trinite elena 'trini' gutiérrez. 26 yrs old. surprisingly quiet for a taurus.

has a clinical psych doctorate (yes @ age 26 .. consider her the femme version of dr spencer reid lmao)

worked as a homicide detective for 3 yrs in miami, fl before transferring to washington, d.c. and starting a forensic psychology career

was involved in a disgusting, horribly traumatic homicide case and was almost murdered as a result; came to plath bc it’s across the country from where those things happened

teaches psychology & abnormal psychology

is friendly and warm, but also severely Messed Up from her time as a detective so take it easy on her

legally she’s a psychologist, so she’s always available 2 talk to before/after class or during down time w/ full confidentiality

if shes in her office shes listening to classical music and drinking wine. thats a guarantee

probably the subject of some steamy, hormone - fueled dreams tbh

tl;dr just another cinnamon roll tryna make her way in this stale, unforgiving world  😂😂

[reversecxpid-blog]

Lis here with this little piece of shit. I’ll introduce him to ya briefly:

Son of a priest. The man used to be married and everything, they divorced and he decided he wanted to follow God’s path.

Gabe spent all of his childhood in the church helping his dad around with stuff and was educated with the extremist points of view of good and bad from his had who thought even the slightest sin deserved the worst punishment.

Gabe was this prodigy-ish kind of boy. Quiet, reading lots of books and agile, but also sadistic and lack of empathy. His fave activity is/was archery. Has Princess Merida accuracy.

In his young years, daddy used to exterminate sinners. He was never found.

Dad trains his little angel to do the same, so dad tells Gabe about secrets told during confessions so he could go and eliminate the stained-soul people.

Most of the confessions were about cheating, so Gabe killed a LOT of cheaters, earning the nickname “Cupid” by the media.

Since the M.O. is similar to the father’s, the police manage to track the crimes and find Gabe’s dad. He’s incarcerated and Gabe is taken like a martyr brainwashed by his dad’s crazy stuff, but OOOH HOHOHO, the boy is no saint. He plays pretend just to stay away from jail and keep on doing his job.

He’s not religious actually, but strongly believes in blunt justice (like a vigilante of some kind), although uses religion as an excuse to seem innocent and perturbed.

Eventually he’s caught as well and police be like “yo this kiddo is actually crazy” and is sent to Plath cause he needs intense therapy and know about empathy, achieved by interacting with others.

The kid is serious, mostly emotionless and quite the observant. If you lie, he’ll know. He’s been studying people and their behavior for a while now.

STILL. He has killed innocent people. He has such a messiah complex and is so narcissist that he thinks he can recognize evil right away just by looking at someone (which yeah no. Cause no one can really tell who’s evil and who’s not just by looking at them), so he has made mistakes (mistakes he’ll never accept) and has killed a bunch of innocent people as well declaring them as guilty.

He hates people who hide behind masks. He likes people who are truly themselves with no filter. He may suck at identifying evil, but he’s good with lies and stuff.

If he was an animal, he would be a cat. Fucking dead (and deadly), but somewhere inside there may be some kind of heart. Considers his own presence as a privilege to others, not like he says it out loud, though.