#permit office cubfan135

[crowsongcaws]

(This has been sitting in my drafts for so long, but Cub's gender is whatever is most convenient and beneficial at any given time. Scar is just a guy that wants to be supportive, but being supportive costs diamonds. Cubfan in a dress forever please)

Scar was zipping through the air when he spotted a non-Grian figure standing just outside the Permit Office. Of course—with his endless curiosity—he had to go investigate, so he swooped down and landed with a force that would undoubtedly have his legs feeling like toothpicks for weeks to come. When some of the spots across his vision had scattered, he was able to see Cub in front of him with an unimpressed expression.

"Shouldn't you be using your wheelchair?" Cub questioned but in that tone. The tone that Scar was very familiar with. The "I sound like I'm asking you but really I know that you know that I already know the answer" tone.

Scar sheepishly glanced around, tapping his cane against the ground particularly hard as if to say look! I'm using some sort of support! When Cub remained silent, Scar figured it was his time to try to defend himself.

"Well, you see, it's really hard to use an elytra when you're in a wheelchair—"

"You're a vex.*"

"But it's so difficult dragging around a wheelchair in vex form!"

Cub slowly—very slowly—blinked at him.

Scar grinned and said, "You know, they say cats blink super slow to show that they trust you!"

Cub blinked again, this time faster.

"...I'll... think about it?" Scar offered. Cub rolled his eyes.

"With how hard you landed just then, I don't think you'll have an option." And then Cub turned to the side, looking down at a clipboard. However, what really caught Scar's attention was the swish of the dress that Cub was wearing.

Was Cub... trans? Had he not noticed the entire time?

"You're—" Scar, somehow, managed to cut himself off.

What kind of friend was he to only notice now after all this time that Cub wasn't cis? Or... maybe Cub was cis and just got tired of pants? Scar had those days, too, especially when just moving got especially painful.

...Did Cub have chronic pain?

"I'm...?" Cub repeated, raising an eyebrow at him.

"Looking absolutely perfect today!" Scar hurriedly said with a grin.

Cub did that half-smile he (she? they?? vex???) tended to do and replied, "Thanks. Picked this out myself. I've been dressing myself for decades—what a game-changer."

Scar laughed, still trying to pick apart if this was something new or something old or what. He'd always referred to Cub with "he" before, and he figured Cub would've told him if that wasn't right, but what if he already had told him and he'd forgotten? What if Cub was plotting revenge against him already? This would be exactly like the time when Cub had been sick, and Scar had gotten him tomato soup to feel better even though Cub hated tomato soup, but Cub had been too sick to realize what it was until he'd had a spoonful. Scar hadn't been able to get all of the glitter paint out of his house for weeks.

With a growing sense of nervousness, Scar hesitantly said, "Whatever you pick out, you always manage to look so... beautiful?"

Cub just smiled at him with a different kind of look—Scar thought he knew all of them, but apparently not.

"Really?" Cub asked.

"Yeah!" he paused, "I mean, unless you... don't... like that...?"

At that, Cub tilted his head with that same odd glint in his eyes.

"Why wouldn't I?"

Shit.

"Very true, my fellow Hermit!" Scar laughed, loud and definitely not nervous. "But! Let's say in a hypothetical situation, Grian was plotting to overthrow your Permit Office reign. Would he say 'Wow, Cub is a super genius. He is going to be very difficult to overthrow' or...?"

Cub hummed thoughtfully, twirling the pencil between his fingers, and replied, "I think it would be better if Grian said 'Wow, Cub is a super genius. I think I'll give up and also pay the attempted-rebellion fee of 50 diamonds as an apology.'"

Shit. None of his ingenious plans were working. And even worse! He'd only just realized he'd been he/him-ing Cub in his head! This was the end of their friendship for sure, and it would be all his fault!

"Since you're here," Cub interrupted his overactive thoughts, "can you read this new form I made? It's just an easier way to keep track of information for each Hermit."

Scar dejectedly nodded and grabbed the clipboard from Cub's hands. Skimming over the text, hope flickered back into his heart because not only did it ask for gender, the form also had a section for preferred pronouns! There were no boxes to check, just an empty space to write down what was needed.

"This looks great!" Scar excitedly said. "But, just to make it easier on me, could you fill it in? Just so I have a good example!"

"If you need it, sure," Cub agreed, taking the clipboard back. It took a little less than a minute, but before he knew it, Scar's life was about to get that much easier. He would never have to admit his fumble today, and Cub would be so proud to know that Scar would always be there and be extra supportive, and—

Gender: Look at pronouns.

Scar did.

Preferred Pronouns: You owe me 10 diamonds, Scar.

SHIT.

"...if I pay you 10 diamonds, will you at least tell me?" Scar hesitantly asked with that same, sheepish smile.

"I don't answer questions for free."

Scar pouted then begrudgingly dug out his shulker box, forking over the payment, which Cub quickly pocketed as if Scar would change his mind any second. The moment the diamonds were out of sight, Cub answered.

"No."

"Wha—huh?"

Cub could barely hold back from smirking.

"You asked me if I'd tell you my pronouns if you paid me 10 diamonds, and the answer is no."

"But—"

"—and you're getting a free explanation all for the price of 10 diamonds. What a discount."

"Cub, please—"

"Looks like my scheduled team bonding exercise time is over, too, so I'll have to put you on hold now. My lunch break is starting."

"The sun is setting—!"

"See you later, Scar."

And, despite Scar's legs screaming in agony, he still dropped to his knees to dramatically screech NOOOOO at the sky.

As he would later find out after pestering any and every Hermit that would listen, Cub did not and had never cared about pronouns. (Cleo had pointedly said, "Wearing a dress doesn't make you trans or change your pronouns. Scar, you've worn a dress." To which Scar cried out, "But I am trans! Wearing a dress changed my pronouns! Just not that way!") Scar was devastated at the loss of ten diamonds when there hadn't even been a wrong answer, but in the end, this outcome was far better than glitter paint.

*I have a headcanon that vexes are near-weightless and don't necessarily need wings to fly, they just use wings to push them around. So Scar, in vex form, could still fly. Also, Scar has a specialized flying machine that functions as a wheelchair, too, but he still prefers not using it because Doc partially helped with constructing it, and he's afraid to find out if Doc added anything life-threatening (to him or others).

Cub has no gender, but if he has to put one down, it's skulk. Scar is trans but frequently forgets about that since he's so comfortable with how he presents now, and no one points it out. Cleo's gender is "Overworked and Underpaid".

can you draw cubfan in a dress I think that would fix me

me too

[roe-oo]

upper management

[non-pulmonic-consonant]

'there was only one bed': mediocre, overused, boring

'there was only one chair': innovative. thrilling. endless opportunities.

[craftinginsanity]

the first time grian finishes the back of something and it’s cubfans ass

[cubfan-montblanc]

you have been DEMOTED! you are now my INFERIOR employee!

[fleetinggill]

I’m not caught up on the permit office shenanigans but this is what’s happening as far as I’m concerned

[3000-200-grains-of-salt]

napping on the job

[lemonebar]

Heey what if we don’t blow stuff up yet?

[polarcornflower]

please tell me I'm right

also all of the badly edited poe skins + jevin if you need them idk

[oil-boy]

I love taskmaster and love hermitcraft so permitmaster made me so happy to watch

[winterline13-art]

Please Hold

[quicksilversnails]

Convex cinematic parallels

[Transcript/description under cut]

A clip from Grian's Season 10 Episode 21 of Hermitcraft. Scar, Skizz, and Grian are watching Cub descend comically slowly from the sky using a slow falling potion and elytra.

Grian: [laughing] Skizz: You! Grian, Skizz, Scar: [laughing] Cub: Hello, boys! Scar: Hello, god! Grian, Skizz, Scar: [continued laughter] Cub: Great to see you all!

Hard cut to a clip from Cubfan135's Season 5 Episode 1 of Hermitcraft. Cub is mining for resources alone.

Cub: [mining in silence] Scar's voice: Maybe if I, unmuted my microphone… Cub: God? Is that you? Scar: It is…

End of transcript

[crumbsispoggers]

under new management

[lavabug]

DAY 8: The Permit Manager & The Assistant of the Permit Manger.

My newest mcyt cos! Me and @/icklecosplay wore them last weekend at Tokonatsu, our favourite camping con <3

Also most importantly:

[crowsongcaws]

YOU MADE THE BOXHEAD??? GUYS PLEASE LOOK AT HER COSPLAY: https://www.tumblr.com/galaxy-lilies/760370536671035392/permit-office-manager-cubfan135

I ain’t going through the pain of making another boxhead so soon HOWEVER I do have the things for an assistant to the permit manager grian

[cubfan-montblanc]

grub is so back baby