#people would rather pity unharmed animals than people with marginalized disorders any day of the week
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Holy shit op you're clearly the asshole here. YTA YTA YTA. Yes it sucks to be reminded of something that triggers you but when your trigger is a disorder or a minority group it is 100% on you to recognize that and understand that it's not an excuse to treat people of those groups poorly.
There is a difference between saying something in the moment and defending/seeking validation for it. Yes, calling a person with a delusional disorder crazy is an asshole thing to do. Yes, even if you're triggered. I don't think being an asshole in one situation makes you a bad person or anything. I think it would be excusable! However, you took it too far, even for someone triggered. Not taking someone's delusions seriously and saying you think that if they don't move out they'll try to KILL you? Asshole. If I were your roommate I'd never forgive you for that shit
HOWEVER your saving grace here is that you acknowledged that what you said was bad. You seem to know it's fucked up. The WRONG thing to do was go to aita about it. If you want to know if the way you treated a delusional person was wrong, don't go to a blog for literally everyone to comment on regardless of how much they care about human rights. Those are the sorts of people who say delusional people deserved to be locked up for truly harmless beliefs. Go to schizospec advocacy blogs. Go to actual psychotic people. Don't seek validation from people who would do far, far worse to your roommate if given the chance
aita for calling my roommate crazy?
I (28f) live with 2 other people, a former college roommate who I’m pretty close with (29f) and 2nd roommate (28nb) who we both met when we moved in together 2 years ago.
Let me start this out by saying, this isn’t a fandom aita, it’s going to sound a bit weird at first, but bear with me.
I have a medical condition (relevant later) which stopped most of my bones from maturing past puberty (growth plates closing, cartilage not hardening into bones, ect.), so my skeleton is basically stuck somewhere between 13-19, (I look about 17-19, but the last time I tried to buy hard cider, the cashier thought I was 14, so that’s how young I can look). I also have very pale skin (unrelated to my disorder, just a ginger), and (related to my disorder) lack some liver enzymes so I need eat meat or I get sick (the same reason why cats need to eat meat), I ended up in the ER when I lived with my vegan sister for a week and ate the same veggie diet as her.
Trouble is, Roommate 2 is really into conspiracy theories and other fringe stuff. Nothing alt-right or anything, just like, (for example) they fully bought into that Mermaids: the body found show, and wouldn’t be dissuaded, even when Roommate 1 googled it and showed them solid proof that it was fictional. Wholeheartedly believes the US government preformed 9/11, does alternative medicine (homeopathy, ect), wishes there were ‘all natural’ vaccines (still isn’t an anti-vaccer though, just needs to be persuaded that Bill Gates didn’t put microchips in them).
Anyway, Roommate 1 and I have a recurring joke that I’m a vampire because of the meat thing and the pale thing and the not aging thing. Roommate 2 overheard us and laughed, but weirdly. She kinda joked along with us, but she seemed...odd. About a week later, they start asking me stuff about being a vampire. But they seemed friendly and not nervous then and I was hoping they were just joking and I also sincerely thought they were just asking me about how vampires work on one of my shows (I’m a big fan of Carmilla and the Originals), so I tried to explain, but I cited each show when I’m explaining a thing. This continued for several weeks, but getting worse and more weird every time, eventually culminating about 2 and a half months later into them asking me more stuff about life as a vampire and I really realised that they were serious. Bear in mind, Roommate 1 and I were trying to be very clear that we don’t believe in vampires this whole time because we both know how Roommate 2 is about this. As a result, this was the first time I really registered that they seriously seemed to genuinely believe I was a vampire. I firmly told them that I am not a vampire and that vampires aren’t real, they’re fun to joke about, but they aren’t real. They implored me ‘to be straight with them about being a vampire,’ and that ‘I could trust them,’ and I’m ashamed to say, I kinda freaked out at this point, cuz I was afraid that they would be scared of me and maybe try to hurt me, since they seemed kinda unstable because of this.
This is where I think I was an asshole, I am usually very sensitive to mental health issues. I have some c-PTSD myself and there are a lot of mental health issues in my family (unfortunately, I think some history with my own mentally ill father may have made me react this way, since he has very similar issues to Roommate 2 (vaccines, alternate medicines, specifically involving me in his delusions) and I had a very bad experience in my early teens where he thought I was a demon and ‘sent to destroy him’). Anyway, I got very upset and I yelled at them, I told them they were completely crazy and needed to get mental help and said I thought Roommate 1 and I needed to move out because they might try to stake my heart or something. I feel really bad for calling them crazy, especially because Roommate 2 has some very mental health issues and words like crazy make light of and stigmatise that and I’m very big into not blaming people for their mental health problems, but this was very triggering and in this moment I was very distresssed.
So, aita, all things considered here? I’m still gonna feel like the asshole no matter what, since mental health problems aren’t to be taken lightly or blamed on the person, but I’m curious what the internet thinks.
What are these acronyms?
#don't seek validation from this. absolutely do not. you did something wrong#you said some shitty things that no psychotic person is ever obligated to forgive you for#however going too far while triggered doesn't mean you're a bad person as long as you recognize it and learn from it#like you're not necessarily a bad person or anything but you 100% went to the wrong source that will absolutely try to downplay what you di#because so many ppl outright hate delusional people for no good fucking reason#you were ableist. but you recognize that and can learn. just go to the right people next time#like let's be clear your reaction to someone doing literally nothing to you but Have A Disorder is to say they should be homeless and/or#stuck in a mental hospital#and i can guarantee you that the people on this post who pretend that being triggered is an excuse not an explanation and that#your mental health means more than the person you unnecessarily verbally attacked#are the same people who called someone a vehement asshole for having a knee jerk trauma reaction where they gently kicked away a dog#that the owner didnt control and ran up to them#people would rather pity unharmed animals than people with marginalized disorders any day of the week#i cant find what happened to the post and i almost hope it's gone because those people were insufferable
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