#peanut dicing machine

[eating-the-inedible]

Here is a list of the inedibles that will be in this bracket

Lava

Orbeez

Orange Joe (fictional "beverage" that's a combination of orange juice and coffee)

Doll shoes

Dirt

Pen caps

Mercury

Watermelon tourmaline

Comet/scouring powder

Moss

Paper towels

Play-Doh

Drywall

Marbles

CD

DVD

Dice

Kinetic Sand

Coins 

Fiberglass insulation

3DS Stylus

Plastic Bottle Cap

Chapstick

Babybell Cheese Wax

Paper

Bouncy ball

Human meat

Venus (planet)

Cascade dishwasher pods

Acrylic Paint

Magnets

Molten glass

Pens

Sea glass

Silica gel packet

Leaves

Cocoa butter lotion

Antifreeze

Pencil Toppers, the lil eraser things

Sand

Tumbled amethyst

Rubber Ducks

The rubber balls from the game Cranium Cariboo

Polly pocket clothes

Poison Dart Frog

Snow

0.1 uF Film Capacitor

The sun

Metal

Eraser

Tide pods

Phone charger wire

Those free wooden pencils you get at ikea (just the wood shell not the lead)

Liquid nitrogen

Aquarium gravel

the weird science juice in the beakers in those stock images

Origami star

Styrofoam cup

Sticky note

Collar of shirt

This submission form

Plastic straws

Glow sticks

Oil paintings

Candle wax

Glass

Nickel sulfate solution/Nickel plating solution

Silicone wristbands

Seatbelt

The wax paper under your Poutine

Forearm (doesn't have to be one's own)

Asbestos

Candy wrapper

“Okay so technically this is edible but I’ve had urges to just take a huge bite out of certain sea creatures before. Like just a chunk from an orca or dolphin or great white or seal, etc.”

“Those stupid wooden spoons”

Furbies

Scotch tape

Artificial grapes (the wax/plastic ones for display)

phone

THE FLESH OF MY ENEMIES

Crystals

Fire

The goo inside  Stretch Armstrong

Headphone wire

Raw steak

Art

Small colorful rubber bands 

Tinfoil

Pencil lead

Cattails (the plant)

Foamy soap

Liquid soap

Bar soap

Flourite

Shiny rocks

Grass

A hunk of random fish swimming by

A live goldfish

Toothpaste

Styrofoam

Price Tag Fasteners

The moon

Pool noodles

Smol frog

Destroying angel mushroom

the smoke coming out of the grain refineries two Mike's out of Gary, Indiana, Usa

Popsicle sticks

Cardboard

My hat

The tiny rocks in school playgrounds

Gasoline

Blue laundry detergent

Spray foam insulation

Battery corrosion

Fiber optic cables

Packing peanuts

Your mother

Pond water

Dry ice

Alkali metals

Chocolate shampoo

Ping pong ball

Bricks, like the stuff you'd build with. Minecraft bricks even, if you want

Hoodie drawstrings

Horse treats

Chalk

Copper (II) Sulphate Water / Blue Science Rock + Blue Science Juice

Ink

Floam

Fabric Paint

Oil paint

that one art piece of the banana taped to the wall

the hotdog somebody encased in resin

“the thin lego plates not the base plates but like the lego piece thats like 2x8 and they kinda look like hershey chocolate bar pieces”

One of those little hamsters

Model magic

Battery Acid (the drink)

manchineel apple

Rubber band ball

The lava lamp liquid

Blood

Rosin

Wax apples

That cake decoration that came with your slice and you're like 90% sure it's not edible... but what if ?

Soap bubble

Lush cosmetics' products

Plushies

Strawberry Shortcake's dolls with scented hair

Wood

Glue

Salt lamp

People who think children are not worth their consideration

Tarmac

Shampoo

Pennies

Poisonous berries

Chunky soft yarn

Crayons 

Rock

“whatever the Chuck E Cheese Ticket Muncher Machine is eating (it's not the tickets) (or the sound itself but that's neither a solid nor a liquid so this is just kind of holding hands with the hypothetical ticket muncher food)”

Snow globe liquid

Chisel tip whiteboard marker

Raw dough

Raw fuckin cactus. alive

Grape agate

Car seat

Succulents

Keys

Lock pick

Scrub daddy

Molten sugar 

Allergens

Lightning bolts

“Bark dust. Like the dirt/bark dust that's under the bark chips on a playground. Not the chips themselves. The dust.”

Clear deodorant

Apple earbud wires

Eggshells

Squinkies

Hello kitty sweatshirt zipper

Preshredded mozzarella cheese

Scrap metal

Rose

All of the rocks at a crystal shop

Origami polyhedron model

Bubbles mixture

Cupcake liners

Hair gel

Curtain rods

Incense sticks

Incense cones

Metal thing that attaches eraser to pencil

Windshield wiper fluid

Plastic pencil grips

Wooden ice cream spoon

Book

Tree

The liquid in levels

Vanilla extract

Aroace flag

Coil incense

California state testing “next question” button

Spackle

Forbidden coal iron french fries

Garage doors that look like chocolate bars

Plastic takeout box

Velvet

Weird anime girl hair

Freezable gel ice pack

Clouds

Necklace chains

Nail polish

Pencil Shavings

Pool floats

Bao Dumpling

Spray deodorant

0.1 uF Ceramic Capacitor

Vanillish (Pokémon)

Fondant

Really fancy pillars

Computers

Favorite song

Tumblr

“THE LITTLE ORBS IN THE MOUSE (aka trackballs)”

“Any cutesy anime character like Chopper or Pikachu”

Wooden fan blades

Balsa wood sticks

Those blankets that look like tortillas

Microwave

Milk and golden honey softsoap

Batteries

1x2 lego pieces

Light bulbs

Slightly melted lounge chair

Cork (the material)

Pineapple coke

Fingernails 

Sparkly lipgloss

Race Car Tire Marble

Gold trophies

Konjac sponge

Shirt

Mandy the Slayer / Orange Spyderco Dragonfly Knife

Malachite

Heater

Glasses Temples

Typewriter keys

EVA foam

Airplane

Sword

Crumbs in the couch

Children

My wife's arm/shoulder

Records

Yellow ACE bandages

Neon Signs

Scented candles

[colorfuldreamsmkg]

Mushroom Kingdom Here We Come! - Ch1 Event

Following a message within the group chat, Cecilie stood perfectly still in the bunker. Awaiting the others to meet her, as she greeted each and everyone who came in with an excitable wave and a laugh. “Hello, everyone. It is time to converse and celebrate with the sprites, may I ask you to hold onto me in some way?” She offers her hand to whomever is the first to take it. “So long as you hold onto one another, we all shall arrive. Hold hands and let us begin this festivity.” 

With the baby chain promptly formed, Cecilie offered the gentlest hum as she played her own UNTITLED.MP3. Light overtakes them until the scene becomes clear.

Welcomed into the whimsical land of the fae by your guide, you’re all led through the forest and the brush to the fairy gala. The sprites don’t pause in their dance routine, but your arrival is noticed by the wildlife. Some take to the skies, the brush, though a few regard your arrival with wary curiosity, approaching nervously. 

Though it’s not like the gala needed much in the way of decoration, Clarabell went all out  in making the place festive…In her own way. The decorations she provided were limp and out of place in a location already so fantastical. Balloons littered the ground and the tables, unable to take to the air without helium. A few of the sprites half-heartedly bounced one back and forth between them before abandoning it to continue with their dancing. Forlorn streamers dangle limp from stumps and trunks, swaying half-heartedly in the occasional breeze.

Witch sits at one of the tables, dressed in a more extravagant-looking, star-themed witch outfit, including a hat with an even bigger brim. Spread across the table are a variety of fortune telling tools: a crystal ball, several candles, dice, pendulums, and of course, her personal deck of tarot cards. At the edge of the table, propped up by a Nendoroid of herself, is a small paper sign that reads “Free* Tarot Readings.” She stares at her phone, seemingly uninterested in the happenings around her.

Cecile hurries to bring the refreshments she made from the kitchen, aided by a series of fairy sprites. Snacks and cuisine and beverages line the tables, including peanut butter cookies, finger sandwiches, fruit salad (without orange slices), fruit punch and hand-iced cupcakes. She appears to be asking the fae if she has made enough; fretting quietly to them as they giggle. 

And finally, Swan is found by the toadstools ringing the tables, fiddling with his newly purchased synth machine and accessories, hooking up and snapping a series of cables and a tangle of wires. He certainly looks busy, only offering a cursory wave before returning to his work. 

At the very least, the music wafting through the air is compelling, enchanting, and you feel almost inclined to move along with it. And the sprites don’t seem adverse to your presence, even welcoming you into their dances and games. 

It’s meant to be a party, right? Why not relax and enjoy it? 

[death-limes]

now that the poll is done i’d like to share some of the “other” options ppl gave, both from the actual poll & from ppl i asked irl. they seem to fall into distinct categories:

u wanna subject blorbo to The Memes

- the plinko (HOW DID I FORGET THE PLINKO AAAAAAAA) - eeby deeby - “go in the dark” - the backrooms

u just wanna shake/spin blorbo around WHEEEEEEEEE

- handheld plastic maze w the metal ball and you tilt it to solve the maze, except blorbo is the ball - centrifuge - juggle them - gyroscope - washing machine/dishwasher - apple peeler

horny

- ur bed - in the jar w rainbow dash (👁️👁️)

blorbo is ur precious baby

- the dog park - barbie dream stable with the horses and all the accessories - bed w/ melatonin & a plushie - in a purse like a lil doggy - heaven - on the fridge like a kid’s drawing - peanut shell w/ a blanket inside like something out of a don bluth movie

blorbo is a Creature u want to analyze

- bug box - in a jar - one of those tubes they use to xray babies and small animals

blorbo must be punished for their crimes (or ur into whomp)

- hydraulic press - wood chipper/blender/food processor/Slap Chop/similar cutting-up device - ur job - actual jail/prison - in a glass prison like Hannibal Lecter - dissection/autopsy/operating table - Saw trap - in front of a train - on a child leash (i know this one fits the “precious baby” category in a literal sense but… cmon we all know this is a punishment) - Mr. Bones’ Wild Ride - Mickey’s Dick Smasher - time-out

blorbo is a tasty treat (lots of overlap w/ the spinning/shaking thing, not sure why)

- dipping them in the chocolate shell at Dairy Queen - on ur plate - tied to a stick & rotated over a fire like a rotisserie - bubble tea shaker - microwave

also i know the dice popper is from Trouble not Sorry ok i know that now i knOWWW let me live my shame in p e a c e

(EDIT: i have been informed that the dice popper is from Trouble, not Sorry. lmao)

[whybrow103210]

Snack time for busy families is easier with the banana cutter tool

In today's fast-paced world, every second counts, and busy families are always looking for ways to make their daily tasks easier. When it comes to the kitchen, tools that save time can make a big difference. When you have the right tools, it's especially easy to make snacks. The banana cutter is the most useful of these tools and should be in every home. This blog post will talk about how this simple but useful tool can change snack time, along with other useful kitchen tools like the electric veggie cutter, lemon cutter, and garlic press tool.

How Important It Is to Have Good Kitchen Tools

For busy families, a kitchen that works well is essential. Parents who have to juggle work, kids' hobbies, and housework need to find ways to save time without giving up healthy eating. Welcome to the world of new kitchen tools that are made to make cooking easier. These tools not only save time, but they also make the process more fun, which makes people more likely to eat better.

How to Use the Banana Cutter Tool

This is a small, hand-held tool called a banana cutter tool that is made to quickly and evenly slice bananas. It's very simple: it just has a bunch of sharp, evenly spread blades that you press once to cut the banana in half. This tool is great for any kitchen because it can quickly and easily cut a whole banana into even slices.

How Do I Choose the Right Banana Cutter?

Saving Time: One of the best things about using a banana cutter tool is that it saves time. It can be time-consuming to cut a banana by hand, especially when you're making snacks for the whole family. With the banana cutter tool, you can quickly cut a banana into slices, which saves a lot of time.

Uniform cuts: It can be hard to use a knife to make cuts that are all the same size. The banana cutter tool makes sure that every slice is the same thickness, which is nice to look at and helps recipes and snacks work out evenly.

Safety: A banana cutter tool is safer than a knife because it lowers the chance of cuts and other injuries. This makes it a better choice for kids who want to help out in the kitchen.

Easy to Clean: Most banana cutters can go in the washing and are simple to clean, which makes them even more useful.

The banana cutter tool can be used at snack time

The banana cutting tool can make snack time a lot more fun. Here are some fun and healthy snack ideas that you can make quickly with this useful tool:

Banana and Peanut Butter Bites: Use the banana cutter to cut a banana into slices, then put peanut butter between two slices to make a tasty and healthy snack.

Fruit salad: To make a fresh fruit salad even better, use the banana cutter tool to cut bananas into thin slices. For a colorful and healthy treat, mix with other foods like apples, berries, and grapes.

Put yogurt, cereal, and sliced bananas in a parfait glass. This is a quick and easy dessert that the whole family will love.

Banana Sandwiches: Instead of bread, use banana slices to make fun and healthy small sandwiches with nut butter, cream cheese, or chocolate spread.

Using the right kitchen tools together will make cooking easier

The banana cutter tool is great for making it easier to make snacks, but there are other cooking tools that can also make things faster and easier. In this article, we will look at some of these tools and how they can help make cooking easier.

The electric veggie cutter is changing the way vegetables are prepared

The electric veggie cutter is a strong machine that cut up vegetables automatically, saving you a lot of time. This tool can cut down on prep time by a lot, giving you more time to work on other parts of making meals.

The electric veggie cutter is flexible because it can cut a wide range of vegetables, from carrots and potatoes to onions and peppers. Some types even have blades that can be switched out to do different kinds of cutting, like dicing, slicing, and julienning.

Consistency: Like the banana cutter, the electric veggie cutter makes sure that your cuts are all the same, which is important for even cooking and meals that look like they were made by a professional.

Ease of Use: The electric vegetable cutter is simple to use, even for people who aren't good with knives, thanks to its user-friendly design.

Time Savings: This tool can save you a lot of time in the kitchen by doing the chopping for you. It's perfect for families with lots of kids.

The lemon cutter always cuts the perfect slices

Lemons are used in a lot of different ways around the house, from drinks and salads to sweets and marinades. The lemon cutter is a special tool that makes it easy to slice lemons evenly and quickly, so you always get perfect results.

Precision: The lemon cutter makes cuts that are straight and even, which is very important for recipes and garnishes that need even lemon slices.

Convenience: This tool makes it easy to add a burst of fresh lemon flavor to your food without having to slice the lemon by hand.

Safety: Just like the banana cutter, the lemon cutter makes it less likely that someone will get cut or hurt, so the whole family can use it without worry.

Garlic Masher Tool: Making Preparing Garlic Easier

Many foods need garlic to work, but making it can take a long time and be messy. The garlic masher is made to make chopping garlic quick and easy, so you can add flavor to your food without all the work.

Efficiency: The garlic masher tool makes it easy to quickly mash or crush garlic cloves, which saves you time and work in the kitchen.

Uniformity: This tool makes sure that your garlic is mashed evenly, which is important for making sure that your foods have the same amount of flavor.

Cleaning: A lot of garlic masher tools can go in the machine and are simple to clean, which makes them even more useful.

Versatility: Some garlic mashers can also be used for ginger or shallots, or other small items. This makes them a useful kitchen tool.

Putting tools together to get the most work done

A banana cutter, an electric veggie cutter, a lemon cutter, and a garlic masher are all useful tools that you can add to your cooking arsenal to make preparing food much easier. You can make tasty and healthy meals with little work with these tools, which not only save time but also make cooking more enjoyable.

Helpful Hints for Busy Families

Here are some useful tips on how to use these kitchen tools to make snack time easier for your busy family:

Plan ahead: Make a list of your meals and snacks for the next week. Having a plan can help you get more out of your cooking tools and make sure you always have healthy foods on hand.

Get the Kids Involved: Use safe, simple tools like the banana cutter tool to get your kids involved in the kitchen. You can teach them useful cooking skills and have more fun with snack time at the same time.

Put together a lot of food at once: To do this, use tools like the electric veggie cutter and garlic press tool. Keep them in the fridge or freezer so you can get to them quickly during the week.

Focus on easy, healthy snacks that you can make quickly to keep things simple. Making healthy snacks doesn't have to take a lot of time when you have tools like the banana cutter tool.

Try Different Recipes: Don't be shy about making your snacks in new ways. You can use the banana cutter to make fun shapes and designs, or you can use your other cooking tools to try out different flavor combinations.

In conclusion

Finding ways to make your daily tasks easier and more streamlined can make a big difference in the busyness of life. There are many useful cooking tools that can save busy families time and effort in the kitchen. The electric veggie cutter, lemon cutter, and garlic masher tool are just a few examples. These tools not only make preparing food faster and easier, but they also make it more fun, which can lead to better eating habits.

With these cool new cooking tools, snack time can be quick, easy, and fun for the whole family. The right cooking tools can make all the difference when you're making a simple fruit salad, a healthy parfait, or a tasty dish. Take advantage of how useful and easy these gadgets are, and spend more time with your family and friends.

[travelingthief]

Hermes Devotional Post!

Not a complete list of course, so feel free to add on!

Travel

Dedicated travel playlist for Hermes

Mindful packing for trips

Road-trips/camping

Trying new modes of travel

Let Him pick the music

Travel by boat/kayak/canoe

Learn to roller skate, skateboard, or longboard

Learn to surf

Go for a bike ride

Find ways to save on gas (like rewards cards)

Misc.

Draw sigils on shoes

Leave coin offerings at the location you start your travels

Travel size portable altar

Give people in need bus fare 

Go for a run 

Picking up coins you find/leaving coins for others

Donating to homeless shelters

Car

Keep up on car maintenance (especially in the wintertime)

Courteous driving (Letting people out, stopping for pedestrians, using your blinker)

Clean snow off other drivers’ cars

Keep your car clean

Giving rides to others

Stopping for those that need help on the side of the road

Invite Him to ride in the passenger seat

Let Him pick the music

International

Get a passport!

Keeping up on foreign affairs

Decorate your passport

See the world!

Make a travel board/destination list

Learn about places you wanna go

Try foreign foods

Nature

Take a nature walk! (Or just a walk around the block)

Dedicate your hiking boots/running shoes to him

Find a spot in nature to talk to Him

Learn about birds in your area and where they come from and go.

Learn how animals communicate (great alongside Artemis)

Communication

Write letters to friends

Send postcards/greeting cards

Call a friend or relative

Reread messages/emails before sending 

Communicate your thoughts and feelings in your relationships

Practice keyboarding

Establish and enforce your boundaries 

Can and string telephones

Keep secrets entrusted to you

Support your local post office

Collect stamps/postcards

Dedicate your phone/laptop to Him

Have a penpal

Language

Keep a journal 

Learn a new language/Revisit the language you started learning and then neglected 

Learn ASL

Learn about the evolution of language and how it is always changing

Be mindful of the language you use in daily life and consider how it affects you and those around you 

Change your self-talk! Keep it positive!

Voice training (Particularly for trans worshippers)

Thinking before you speak

Learn about older forms of communication (like Morse Code)

Learn braille 

Go to the library and practice reading books in a foreign language (Great to do alongside Athena)

Practice writing (great to do alongside Apollo) 

Learn about the elements of writing, like allegory and metaphors (alongside Apollo)

Trickery and luck

Play pranks (remember: good pranks cause confusion, not harm)

Learn magic tricks 

Buy scratch offs/play the lottery

Understand how gambling addictions affect people

Dice and card games

Learn about good luck charms/Make your own

Night at the casino 

Learn about superstitions

Games like billiards or darts

Arcade/video games/carnival games

Make small/friendly bets

Poker nights!

Game of horseshoes

Learn parlor games

Miscellaneous 

Smoke a bowl with Him! (If your relationship is like that)

Offer him coffee and energy drinks

Trail mix, candy, road-trip snacks, 

Learn a good joke

Write/perform stand up comedy 

Related Jobs

Mail carriers and sorters

 Retail workers (Hermes of Merchants & Commerce)

 Canvassers 

Editors, journalists, and writers

Newspaper routes

Bank tellers

Carnies 

Casino workers

Gas station attendants

 Mechanics 

Where I Acknowledge Him

Gas stations

Mail carriers/trucks

Worn-looking travelers (thinking of the eye-patched man lounging on the sidewalk smoking a cigarette. Hope to be that content one day)

Gumball machines give me his vibe

Arcade games, pinball machines, and air hockey 

Flea markets/garage sales

Simple Acts to Devote to Him

Checking your mail

Checking email/voicemail

Buying stamps

Flipping a coin

Dice divination

Charm casting

Collections

Rocks

Coins/money 

Good luck charms

Pens/writing utensils

Playing cards

Dice (Looking at you D&D players)

Offerings

Orange peels

Trail mix/peanuts

Road-trip snacks

Rocks & pebbles, coins, cool things you find outside

Travel souvenirs 

Good luck charms

Energy drinks

Coffee (bonus points for gas station coffee)

Letters/postcards/stamps

Apples/bananas/grapes

Foreign foods

[gushingabtlove]

when ur bfs are all a little funny silly brain <33

this goes out to not even half of my fruity little oc boyfriends who i love very very much <33

lava lamp (+ briar), boombox, kaleidoscope, bathbomb, glowbi, jellyfish, daddy long legs, custard, retrogade, loomy, jewelry box, cream pie, butterbread, sparkler, nightlight, honeycake, campfire, gummyworm, discoball, paintbrush, 8-ball, firefly, artboard, slushie, beanbag, paintball, shutters, fortune teller, landmine, jewelmine, bombasm, magic marker, glitter pen, matchbox, funnyface, shadow mask, bubblecup, domino, axeman, jester, reverse, goggles, clock-out, tapestry, king, streets, crutches, discotheque, vhs, vm, quip, camera man, statiklis, hotline, cutcord, wiresaw, powerline, record, fillter, sey, logbook, researcher, delivery, mandyl, casting, orbee, milkyway, valan, herring, styxo, ruler, error, buttons, cryogen, daydream, ikbo, marbles, ozzy, zz, dollie, claw machine, carnival, sewing needle, gameboy, bendy, bowtie, starfish, firecracker, cotton candy, birthday, cupcake, portrait, fair, cakewalk, balloon, ocean eyes, goldie, smiles, post-it, blondie, wannabe, hushpuppy, pseudonym, drearie, softie, lockbox, memory, eternity, zenith, vigor, spider eyes, monday, tsunami, ragdoll, mixtape, dj, erase, zipper, newsie, cigar, knots, signal, analog, iq, broker, album, techy, radar, algorithm, candlestick, milkshake, raspberry sorbet, strawberry lemonade, honeycomb, whipped cream, bon-bon, cocoa, grape soda, fizz, cornbread, fruit punch, poprocks, pb&j, blackberry pie, popsicle, icing, gingerbread, peach crumble, teacake, sprinkles, cheesecake, peanut butter, rollcake, sugar cookie, toffee pudding, dropper, slim-jim, parka, nasty, paparazzi, oxy, dickie, party, seldom, noddles, needles, vodka, molly rose, infrared, coke, injection, re-al, pill, addict, mr. prescription, rubs, bandages, naughty, birthday candle, flamethrower, wind chimes, streamers, delicacy, quake, licorice, peach blush, frostbite, hyperthermia, sandglass, snakebite, bambi, vignette, waffle iron, somnophobia, viperpop, lightbulb, wallflower, ariel, cyanide, ghastor, peril, mirror shard, angelita, the doctor, lazuli, siderite, plasma, amnesia, pepper steak, anndy, neo, cat eye, apology, gumdrop, inkwell, think 101, aim, look at the stars.crp, twisted.exe, hedonism, lotus, phantasm, legacy, shivering, vil.exg, alzen, rose, bowie, mars, june, elzen, january, july, cake, lumi, neptune, alix, pyro, distortion, death, ecstasy, equity, wisp, determination, alastor, nate, zest, vinn, valarian, xest, vesper, marcy, k2, anonymous, anxiety, norman, adel, anna, xexter, oz, amon, azrael, brandon, cordon, chaim, camron, river, zap, sick, unknown, pumpkin head, ethan, damien, unstable, glitch, seren, kayan, core, spice, lisp, wisp, marsh, liam, logan, daniel, rylo, karl, cinder, kindle, break, saturn, gem, lonnie, eleven, thirteen, nine, twelve, vason, aster, toxicity, darling, pyromania, cross, infatuation, dis, angel, cobi, alice, bonnibel, ray, conifer, phantom, rot, teeth, cheezit, casino, twist, mania, bruxism, yohan, lucifer, chimes, morphine, foxglove, slumber, fear, pallid, gossamer, kenny, pepper, sour, sweet, quincey, jack (+jackl), phoenix, swiss, borealis, bicchiere, juno, pond, opium, eve, esque, petrichor, elysian, sheep, saeran, blue, thirtyfour, sea, gorge, corette, popgoes, nabu, penumbra, daffodil, remedy, silkra, polaris, nabbi, stitches, patchwork, sunkiss, spindle, uri, bride, evangelion, corpse, petunia, swan, melatonin, chorus, tempest, gold, heartwood, wyx, wik, chavell, hern, zin, sonna, esconder, oakley, jonquil, jules, kaz, valentine, savel, alifer, hexikiah, flair, orion, roman, aurelius, lio, supernova, hyperburst, xale, reino, karami, amaiera, vinnie, sylvester, ghost, amoxie, thyme, khai, leno, tyrian, amaranth, wish, valley, jockoline, knife, cubbie, keys, patchwork, clay, fran, ricky, starburst, matrix, richie, koen, fantasia, treasure, saint, rem, sunflower, law, dice, spade, brione, klahoma, klub, juxapose, shark, coast, pearl, fable, canopy, queen, fae, xyin, anomaly, december, november, t, haunterly, kiss, sixteen, five, veil, pom pom, laine, winlei, estan, raby, sachele, cj, null, ziggy, lanton, sannette

passion, masky, rosibene, nonsense, decay, salem, lockie, sugar, limin, spitts, everett, soda, fitz, bō, daughtry, hao, kastlane, afternoon, lucas, louise, mimmy, yusef, equinox, anthemion, três, viridian, celadon, faigan, radio, syrup, rise, elowen, veraine, axe, creep, vanity, yellow, boston, kain, riles, quick, hydraon, nessie, mousse, ecto, beastly, worship, cannibalism, stalking, abandon, ketamine, pretender, hypocrisy, quixotic, opulence, opportunity, sensuality, sobriety, rage, apocalypse, negligence, irrationality, cube

[anonymouslylookinggoat]

@sunberies @teriyak1sauce @skully-drawls @katlyntheartist @yamperjellety @madhalo @merp0515 @klyoma2 @em-doods @caimandrey-trolls @ominus-potato @avengerchuck @its-a-me-mango @jdexhusband @ilovesand124 @hey-hey-j @terrifictoons-art @taborc @that-cool-guy @franpun @maimbrain @spooky-pop @theprincekingsofhell @vinophidianfanart @joe-o-vanilla @fakepeppinomybeloved @sukiiwake @maxxii11 @doofazoid @smg4princessau @funkii4-blog @sunnystrollblog @trollsbroppy @lackadaisycats @pocketbutch @pizzabox-box @coralalala64 @felsicveins @theartistisme43 @weevmo @troubldteenz @toonbinge @funktrolls @bittybadger @scimagic @eliscz @shandzii @mysterybensmysteryblog @fluffffpillow @learnification @jelly-fish-wishes @furiouspatience @hugsarethugs @poliel @trapsanchez1 @wanderloveshater @ominous-auburn-orbs @laweonakenny @overallsandfunnyhats @afrothunderxx96 @dipdopdog @remaking-machine @radaverse @selacisky @through-the-eyes-of-fakino @the-awful-falafel @forevercr1nge @gooseworx @donttellsilver @ramensucks @sweetshysilver @recklessbucket @tv-tower @klyoma @cherryrollarts @comeback-king-comic @loloavy @silverstarsheep @rascal-rose @gabaobab @ask-some-imaginary-friends @eddsworld-tbatf @tbatf-callout @buddy-boi-420 @deepdish-tower-au @jellazticious @nomlioart @sleezeboss @pepperonitowerask @cycles-ptau @cheygrembaby @evilcat030 @poetax @theskeletongames @weird0nerdo @snippit-crickit @idakyrie @ali-borsch @ratcate @beatcroc @rumus01 @melissarthomson @sleazeboss-blog @zaraegis @elm-writes-stories @nicecarito @blankalisek @creonininkwell @empiireans @mawshake-scribbles @chidunno @doodzoodz @nsfwaegis @triple-pupil-but-nasty @triple-pupil @k4pp4-8 @fruity-m0nster @thefluffyslipper @rayix @boo-topia @scout-the-um-scout @cupcakeruth @ask-dices-cups @springbon-t-art @l-ii-zz @ccupz @winniefrez @winniefrezcomics @theoutcastedartist @thingsaday @vinophidian-comics @jencilthepencil @neonross @brothers-of-inkwell @jack-is-everywhere @noiseafterhours @tinderboxofsillyideas @hakkids @pearrosite @unholy-screeching9 @ieatsockz @4ce-of-2pades-inkwell @peppinospizzaofficial @peppinofucker69 @peppizza-au @geeky92 @catoonz @rambler-in-limbo @purplemang0z @cytricacidart @bl0oppy @cappycino @im-abanana @memelzebub @moxtoons @peanutable @ando666detonao @darkmirror804 @ask-casino-cups-swap-au @madfantom @lilluciferau @camodielsart @askcupsandcasinos @loimologia @cryinganabell @baa-whatever @sketchbook-and-tony-adventures @brightgoat @unofficial-underfell @sketchalicious @chocopink @staff

Hello dear!

Sorry for bothering you, but it's important to remind you to turn off your asks for a few days! Bad things are going to happen on Tumblr soon...

Don t know anything about this but BETTER BE SAFE EVERYBODY!!!!!!

[wjbsart]

A complete, very long list of all GBoard-combinable emojis because I can't find one anywhere.

Ok so for those who haven't seen my stuff (or have only seen my Bionicle posts), I sometimes emoji mashup redraws, with the recent fourth one using GBoard-based fusions. Frustratingly, there's no actual list of fusion-compatible emojis, so I'll attempt to compile them, in a list below the "Read More" thing:

Green/▢ = compatible with fusion Blue/△ = only works with certain emojis Red/◯ = not compatible with fusion

Also, since other people's terms for specific emojis might not match up with mine, I recommend using CTRL+F and then doing this to find the specific emoji you're looking for. This list is in the order presented in GBoard's Emoji menu. Some of them will be generic unicode symbols, I don't know how to change that, sorry for the inconvenience. Also, I won't aknowledge multi-category Emoji.

Smileys and Emoticons

😀Open-mouthed smile▢

😃Wide-eyed smile▢

😄Closed-eyed smile▢

😁Closed-eyed grin▢

😆Laughing▢

😅Sweating smile▢

😂Cry-laughing▢

🤣Cry-ROFLing▢

😭Crying▢

😗Kissing▢

😙Kissing, closed eyes▢

😚Kissing, blushing▢

😘Kissing, winking w/ heart▢

🥰Surrounded by hearts▢

😍Heart-eyes▢

🤩Star-eyes▢

🥳Noisemaker and party-hat▢

🤗Hugging▢

🙃Upside-down▢

🙂Smile▢

☺Blushing, smiling▢

😊Blushing▢

😏Looking off to the side▢

😌Relieved▢

😉Winking▢

🤭Hand over mouth▢

😶Nightmare fuel Mouthless▢

😐Neutral▢

😑-_-▢

😔Pensive▢

😋Licking lips▢

😛Tongue out▢

😝Tongue out, eyes closed▢

😜Tongue out, winking▢

🤪Tongue out, wide-eyed▢

🤔Hmmm▢

🤨Suspicious▢

🧐Monocle▢

🙄Rolling eyes▢

😒Unamused▢

😤Snorting▢

😠Angry▢

😡Angry, red▢

🤬Swearing▢

☹Frown▢

🙁Frown but less▢

😕Confused▢

😟Distraught▢

🥺Pleading▢

😳AWOOGA Flushed▢

😬Yikes▢

🤐Zip▢

🤫Shushing▢

😰Distraught, sweating▢

😧Distraught, shocked▢

😦Distraught, neutral▢

😮Open mouth▢

😯Open mouth, surprised▢

😲Shocked▢

😱Horrified▢

🤯Your head asplode Mind blown▢

😢Crying, single tear▢

😥Crying, less sad▢

😓Sweating▢

😞Dissapointed▢

😖Pained▢

😣Persevering▢

😩Weary▢

😫Tired▢

🤤Drooling▢

😴Sleeping▢

😪Sleeping but different?▢

🌛Left-facing moon▢

🌜Right-facing moon▢

🌚New moon face◯

🌝Full moon face◯

🌞The sun▢

🤢Queasy▢

🤮Vomiting▢

🤧Sneezing▢

🤒Unwell▢

🤕Bandaged▢

🥴Drunk▢

😵Dizzy▢

🥵Hot▢

🥶Cold▢

😷Masked up▢

😇Angel▢

🤠yee haw▢

🤑Money-tongue▢

😎Cool▢

🤓Nerd▢

🤥Lying▢

🤡Clown▢

👻Ghost▢

💩Poop▢

👽Ayy lmao Alien▢

🤖Robot▢

🎃Jack-o-Lantern▢

😈Demon 1▢

👿Demon 2▢

👹Oni◯

👺Tengu◯

☠Skull and crossbones▢

🔥Fire▢

💫Star with trail▢

⭐Star▢

🌟Star with bits▢

✨Stars▢

⚡Lightning◯

💥Explosion◯

💯100△

💢Anime anger symbol◯

💨Steam▢

💦Sweat Droplets▢

💤Zzz▢

🕳Hole▢

🎉Party popper▢

🎊Confetti ball▢

😺😸😹😻😼😽🙀😿😾Literally all the "cat in different emotions" emojis▢

❤🧡💛💚💙💜🖤Literally all the coloured hearts△

♥Heart suit▢

💘Heart with arrow▢

💝Heart with ribbon▢

💖Shiny heart▢

💗Growing heart▢

💓Beating heart▢

💞Swirling hearts▢

💕Two hearts▢

💌Love letter▢

💟Heart in square▢

❣Heart exclamation mark▢

💔Broken heart▢

💋Kiss▢

👥Two silhouettes◯

👤Silhouette◯

🗣Talking silhouette◯

👣Footprints◯

🧠Brain◯

🦠Microbe▢

🦷Tooth◯

🦴Bone◯

💀Skull▢

👀Eyes◯

👁Eye▢

👄Lips◯

👅Tongue◯

👃👂🦶🦵💪👍👎👏🙌👐Every other body part and hand gesture, seriously this isn't even all of them◯

People

Seriously, I don't know why none of the people-category emojis are Fusion-compatible. Let's just move on.◯

Animals and Nature

💐Bunch of flowers▢

🌹Rose▢

🥀Wilted rose◯

🌷Tulip▢

🌺Hibiscus flower◯

🌸Cherry blossom▢

🏵Rosette◯

🌻Sunflower◯

🌼Daisy▢

💮White flower◯

🍂Falling leaves◯

🍁Maple leaf◯

🌾Rice plants◯

🌱Seedling◯

🌿Herb◯

🍃Falling leaves again◯

☘3-leaf clover◯

🍀4-leaf clover◯

🌵Cactus▢

🌴Palm tree◯

🌳Deciduous tree◯

🌲Coniferous tree▢

🏞National park◯

⛰Mountain◯

🌊Wave◯

🌬Wind◯

🌀Tornado symbol◯

🌁Foggy scene◯

🌫Fog▢

🌪Tornado▢

☃Snowman (with snow)▢

⛄Snowman (without snow)▢

❄Snowflake

🏔Mountain with snow◯

🌡Thermometer◯

🌋Volcano◯

🏜Desert◯

🏝Desert island◯

🏖Beach◯

🌅Sunrise/set (water)◯

🌄Sunrise/set (mountains)◯

☀Sun▢

🌤Sun with cloud◯

⛅Sun and cloud◯

🌥Cloud with sun◯

🌦Sun and cloud with rain◯

☁Cloud▢

🌨Snowcloud◯

⛈Stormcloud◯

🌩Thundercloud◯

🌧Raincloud◯

💧Drop◯

☔Umbrella with rain◯

🌈Rainbow▢

✨Sparkles▢

🌙Crescent Moon◯

☄Comet◯

🌠Shooting star▢

🌌Milky Way◯

🌉Bridge◯

🌆City in the evening▢

🌃City at night▢

🌍🌏🌎Earth▢

🌑🌒🌓🌔🌕🌖🌗🌘The moon◯

🙈🙉🙊🐵Monkeys, wise or not▢

🦁Lion face▢

🐯Tiger face◯

🐱Cat face▢

🐶Dog face◯

🐺Wolf face◯

🐻Bear face▢

🐨Koala face▢

🐼Panda face▢

🐹Hamster face◯

🐭Mouse face◯

🐰Rabbit face▢

🦊Fox face◯

🦝Raccoon face◯

🐮Cow face◯

🐷Pig face▢

🐽Pig nose▢

🐗Boar head◯

🦓Zebra head◯

🦄Unicorn head▢

🐴Horse head◯

🐸Frog face◯

🐲Dragon head◯

🦎Lizard◯

🐉Dragon◯

���T-Rex◯

🦕Diplodocus◯

🐢Turtle▢

🐊Crocodile◯

🐍Snake◯

🐁Mouse▢

🐀Rat◯

🐇Rabbit▢

🐈Cat▢

🐩Poodle◯

🐕Dog◯

🐅Tiger◯

🐆Leopard◯

🐎Horse◯

🐖Pig▢

🐄Cow◯

🐂Bull◯

🐃Water buffalo◯

🐏Ram◯

🐑Sheep◯

🐐Goat▢

🦌Deer▢

🦙Llama▢

🦘Kangaroo◯

🐘Elephant◯

🦏Rhinoceros◯

🦛Hippopotamus◯

🦒Giraffe◯

🐒Monkey▢

🦍Gorilla◯

🐪🐫Camels◯

🐿Squirrel (why does the squirrel of all things have a Unicode symbol?)◯

🦡Badger◯

🦔Hedgehog▢

🦇Bat▢

🐓Cockerel/rooster◯

🐔Chicken◯

🐣🐥🐤Chicks◯

🐦Bird▢

🦉Owl▢

🦅Eagle◯

🦜Parrot◯

🕊Dove◯

🦢Swan◯

🦚Peacock◯

🦃Turkey◯

🦆Duck◯

🐧Penguin◯

🦈Shark◯

🐬Dolphin◯

🐋🐳Whales◯

🐟Fish▢

🐠Tropical fish◯

🐡Pufferfish◯

🦐Prawn◯

🦞Lobster◯

🦀Crab◯

🦑Squid◯

🐙Octopus▢

🦂Scorpion▢

🕷Spider▢

🕸Spiderweb◯

🐚Shell◯

🐌Snail▢

🐜Ant◯

🦗Grasshopper◯

🦟Mosquito◯

🐝Bee▢

🐞Ladybird◯

🦋Butterfly◯

🐛"Bug" yeah sure ok◯

🐾Pawprints◯

Food and Drink

🍓Strawberry▢

🍒Cherry◯

🍎Red apple◯

🍉Watermelon◯

🍑Peach◯

🍊Orange◯

🥭Mango◯

🍍Pineapple▢

🍌Banana◯

🍋Lemon▢

🍈Melon◯

🍏Green apple◯

🍐Pear◯

🥝Kiwi◯

🍇Grapes◯

🥥Coconut◯

🍅Tomato◯

🌶Chili▢

🍄Mushroom◯

🥕Carrot◯

🍠Sweet potato◯

🌽Corn◯

🥦Broccoli◯

🥒Cucumber◯

🥬Lettuce◯

🥑Avocado▢

🍆Aubergine◯

🥔Potato◯

🌰Nut◯

🥜Peanuts◯

🍞Bread▢

🥐Croissant◯

🥖Baguette▢

🥯Bagel◯

🥞Pancakes◯

🍳Frying pan◯

🥚Egg (somehow)◯

🧀Cheese▢

🥓Bacon◯

🥩Meat◯

🍗Chicken leg◯

🍖Anime meat◯

🍔Burger◯

🌭Hotdog▢

🥪Sandwich◯

🥨Pretzel◯

���Chips◯

🍕Pizza◯

🌮Taco◯

🌯Wrap◯

🥙Stuffed flatbread◯

🥘Paella◯

🍝Spaghetti◯

🥫Can◯

🥣Bowl◯

🥗Salad◯

🍲Pot of food◯

🍛Curry◯

🍜Noodles◯

🍣Sushi◯

🍤Fried prawn◯

🥡Takeaway container◯

🍚Cooked rice◯

🍱Bento◯

🥟Dumpling◯

🍢Oden◯

🍙Jelly Donut Rice ball◯

🍘Rice cracker◯

🍥Fishcake◯

🍡Dango◯

🥠Fortune cookie◯

🥮Moon cake◯

🍧Shave ice◯

🍨Ice cream◯

🍦See above◯

🥧Pie◯

🍰Cake slice◯

🍮Custard mate what kinda custard have you been eating, this is clearly a créme caramel◯

🎂Birthday cake▢

🧁Cupcake▢

🍭Lollipop◯

🍬Boiled sweet◯

🍫Chocolate◯

🍩Donut◯

🍪Cookie◯

🍯Honey◯

🧂Salt◯

🍿Popcorn◯

🥤Soft drink◯

🥛Milk◯

🍼Baby bottle◯

🍵Green tea◯

☕Coffee▢

🍺Beer◯

🍻Beers, plural◯

🥂Champagne glasses◯

🍾Champagne◯

🍷Red red wine◯

🥃Whiskey◯

🍸Martini◯

🍹Cocktail◯

🍶Sake◯

🥢Chopsticks◯

🍴Knife and fork▢

🥄Spoon◯

🔪Kitchen knife◯

🍽Plate▢

Travel and Places

🛑🎡Everything from the stop sign to Ferris wheel◯

🎠Merry-go-round horse▢

🎪🏕Everything from circus tent to campsite◯

🌇City at sunset yes I'm surprised as you are▢

🛤Train tracks◯

🛣Road◯

🗺Map◯

🗾Japan is an island by the sea filled with volcanoes and it's beautifuul!◯

🌐Globe with meridian lines▢

💺Plane seat◯

🧳Luggage◯

Activities and Events

🎈Balloon▢

🎀Bow◯

🎁Present◯

🎇Sparkler◯

🎆Fireworks◯

🧨Dynamite Firecracker◯

🧧Red envelope◯

🎐Wind chime◯

🎏Fish streamers◯

🎎Japanese dolls (that's what the emoji's called, don't @ me with the actual name for them)◯

🎑Moon viewing ceremony◯

🎍Pine decoration◯

🎋Tanabata◯

🎄Christmas tree▢

🎗Ribbon△

🥇🥈🥉🏅🎖Medals◯

🏆Trophy◯

📣Megaphone◯

🥅Goal◯

⚽⚾🥎🏀🏐🏈🏉🎾🏸🥍🏏🏑🏒SPORTS◯

🥌Curling stone◯

🛷Rosebud Sled◯

🎿Ski◯

⛸Skate◯

⛳Golf-hole◯

🎯Target◯

🏹Bow◯

🥏Frisbee◯

🎣Fishing rod▢

🎽Running shirt◯

🥋Martial arts uniform◯

🥊Boxing glove◯

🎱8-ball◯

🏓Ping-pong◯

🎳Bowling◯

♟Chess◯

🧩Puzzle piece◯

🎮Controller◯

🕹Joystick◯

👾Videogame alien◯

🔫Gun◯

🎲Dice◯

🎰Slot machine◯

🎴Flower playing card◯

🀄Mahjong tile◯

🃏Joker◯

🎩Top hat◯

📷📸Camera◯

🖼Painting◯

🖌Paintbrush◯

🖍Crayon◯

🧵String◯

🧶Wool◯

🎼🎵🎶Music▢

🎷🎺🎸🎻🥁Instruments◯

🎤Mic◯

🎧Headphones▢

🎚🎛🎙📻Assorted audio stuff◯

📺TV◯

📼VHS◯

📹Camcorder◯

📽Projector◯

🎥Film camera◯

🎞Film◯

🎬Clapperboard◯

🎭Comedy and tragedy masks◯

🎫🎟Tickets◯

Objects

📱🧻Everything from smartphone to toilet roll◯

🧸Teddy bear▢

🧷🧢Everything from safety pin to baseball cap◯

👑Crown▢

🎒💍Everything from backpack to ring◯

💎Diamond▢

💄👓Everything from lipstick to glasses◯

🕶Sunglasses▢

🥽📁Everything from goggles to folder◯

🕶Newspaper▢

🗞🔎Everything from rolled-up newspaper to right-pointing magnifying glass◯

🔮Crystal ball▢

🧿🔓Everything from Nazar amulet to open lock◯

Symbols

There are no compatible non-repeated Emoji here.◯

Flags

Aaaaand none here either.◯

Feel free to let me know if I got anything wrong.

[tatooedlaura-blog]

The Warmest Thing I Own

Feeling good enough for the time being to attempt herding Mulder in a grocery store ... 

Our Moments: Chapter 1: Five Words (post-Leonard Betts) Chapter 2: Sidebar Nonsense (post-Memento Mori) Chapter 3: Interim (floating somewhere around Unrequited) Chapter 4: Max 2.0 (post-Tempus Fugit/Max) Chapter 5: Shadowed Grey Eyes Chapter 6: The Warmest Thing I Own @today-in-fic

&&&&&&&&&&

The following morning, she woke him up, stretching beside him, humming as her muscles flexed and moved, liquid twist of spine and limb. He felt her and opened his eyes, finding the room grey but light, “what time is it?”

Her voice scratched out an, ‘I don’t care’ before burying her head back in the pillow.

“Are we not caring today? ‘Cause I can get behind not caring today.” Reaching out to poke her side, “how are you feeling?”

Rolling in his direction, she gave him a smile that could have lit the city had she come with plug and adaptor, “I actually feel okay. I don’t think I’ve slept like that in weeks.”

“No nightmares?”

“No. Only dreams of farmhouses and men in kilts.”

Mulder laughed, “more than one?”

“Maybe.” Sighing deep, “it’s Saturday, right? Now, I know we’d normally share the worry today but I think I’d rather ignore it completely and go grocery shopping and maybe make dinner and eat a gallon of ice cream.”

“It’s actually Friday but I’m good with all that anyway.” Finally able to see the clock on her nightstand, “it’s 8:27 so I vote you call Skinner while I go shower, then we commence.”

Booping his nose, “you’ve got five minutes or I’m coming in.”

Good God.

He knew she was joking. Had to be joking. But he found himself washing a little slower than usual, wanted to see what she would do at the five-minute mark.

She stood outside the bathroom door at 4 minute, 45 seconds, hand on knob. She felt giddy and free and happy and relatively well and the thought of opening the door made her stomach tighten but would it be all kinds of stupid?

Five minutes.

She felt her hand turning the damn handle.

Just as Mulder pulled the door open.

She stumbled forward into wet flesh, towel around waist holding fast as Mulder took a step back, catching her in his arms, “hi there.”

Both knew she had been opening the door.

“Hi.”

“Almost didn’t make it.” Eyes sparking down at her, given he now knew she had been opening the door, “damn slow water heater.”

She was red.

It amused him.

“Were you coming in for something?”

Something, at the moment, in her mind, was removing his towel and taking him back into the shower but instead, she pointed around him, “toothbrush.”

His grin made her shake her head, slip under his arm, brush her teeth, and keep taking deep breaths.

They were both crazy.

&&&&&&&&&&&

Grocery shopping with Mulder was akin to herding cats. She looked left at something, he threw three things from the right into the cart. She questioned two of them and winning, turned right to replace them on the shelf while Mulder, pouting, turned left, tossing in two other things, plus a box of Twinkies.

Finally, she threated to make him sit in the cart and while he looked her square in the eye, evaluating life and limb, he reached up, tipping a box of CocoPuffs from the top shelf into the cart, never breaking eye contact.

By the end, they had at least remembered the juice boxes.

Steaks were the order of the day, Mulder waving away her cheap-ass $6.00 on sale frugal fingers in favor of the New York strips, thick, red, mouth-watering, and definitely not $6.00. Mistaking her longing look for hunger, he gently turned her away, “we need to cook them first.”

Swallowing, “I know.”

Mashed potatoes followed, “yes, I’m getting the box of potato flakes because real potatoes are too damn much work.”

“Fine by me.” Then came the three pounds of mushrooms, “who the hell is washing all these dishes?”

Mulder smiled, tossing a bulb of garlic in the cart, “dishwasher. You have one but you never use it. I’ll teach you how tonight.”

She just kept stealing glances at the steaks.

Ice cream came last, small tubs of chocolate, cherry, orange sherbet, mint, dark fudge, and peanut butter swirl, “I like variety. Don’t look at me like that.”

“I’m just wondering if either of us will be able to fit through the front door by the time we’re done.”

“You could stand to gain twenty pounds.”

He hadn’t meant to say it out loud, bring reality into their fun but glancing at her, he saw understanding in her eyes, her hand finding its way into his for a moment, “I’d rather not do it all in one night, if that’s okay?”

She got a long hug for that, shoppers steering around the odd couple embracing in the freezer section but smiling at them regardless because, really, there’s nothing wrong with a little love in frozen foods.

Mulder paid the bill and Scully didn’t fight it, especially after she saw the amount of items he’d stashed in the basket under her radar, “how did I not see any of this?”

“Once you caught sight of the steaks, I could have jammed an elephant in here and you’d have never noticed.” Handing the cashier his credit card, “little woman’s got an appetite.”

Swatting him on the arm, “Mulder! Did you see how many things of ice cream you got? I don’t know how we’re going to fit all that in the freezer.”

The cashier grinned, handing him his card back, “you can always buy her a bigger freezer.”

“This is very true. Freezer shopping next.”

Scully gave up, “that’ll be tomorrow’s trip. We’ll just have to eat all this tonight.”

“Challenge accepted.”

&&&&&&&&&&&

Back at the apartment, groceries spread from one end of the counter to the other, Scully was mid-ice cream put away when she stopped, hand shaking, head spinning. After a second, she turned to Mulder, his back to her, “I’m, um, if you don’t mind, I’m going to go lay down.” Her hand was already rubbing her forehead, “are you okay putting everything away?”

Turning, his stomach sank at how pasty pale she’d become in the last two minutes, “yeah. I’m fine. Go take a nap.”

She was already moving, one hand on the wall of the hall to steady herself as she headed to the bedroom. Once alone, he slowly, methodically, put the groceries in their proper places, shutting cupboards quietly, trying not to rattle pasta or click jars. Five minutes and a fully stocked kitchen later, he realized it was only a little after one. She’d made it four hours. It had been a good four hours but …

If he dwelled on that, he’d scream at the top of his lungs, cursing the sky, fist shaking in the air. Instead, he pulled the mushrooms back out, deciding some manual cooking labor would keep his mind occupied.

That and trying not to cut the tips of his fingers off.

Three pounds of mushrooms, a stick of butter, six cloves of garlic, a teaspoon of salt, and ½ that of pepper later, and small, diced onion to boot, he set her crockpot to warm, snapped the lid tight, and wondered what next.

Sheets.

Put the sheets in the dryer.

Checking that the stains were gone, he hit the button to set the machine humming.

Clean up.

Last night’s Chinese cartons and chopsticks were still on the coffee table. Trash. Check.

Take out the trash. It smelled. He killed five minutes tying the bag, walking it to the garbage chute. Coming back inside and locking the door.

Then he stood there. Tight circle rotating, trying to find something else.

He knew what he wanted to do but felt he shouldn’t. She was fine. She would yell for him if need be.

Bu something kept pulling him in the direction of her bedroom.

“Fuck it.”

He made his way to her door to find her curled on the bed, small lump under thick covers. Stealing to the other side, he carefully lay down, sliding under the quilt in silence. If she wanted to, she could hit him later for arriving in her bed unannounced.

He would love it if she had the strength to hit him hard enough for it to make an impact.

Then again, she’d hit him before and it never made an impact.

It mostly just made him more stubborn and annoying.

He couldn’t help a small smile as he thought about how irritating he could be but she just kept coming back anyways.

She’d come back from this, too. She had to.

She had no choice.

He could see the tension in her face, even while asleep, forehead wrinkled, eyebrows tight. Reaching out, he began massaging between her eyes, imaging that fucking tumor only an inch below his thumb. How the hell could they not take the damn thing out? It was right there.

Right.

There.

Another thought he had to banish from his mind or screaming would ensue, he kept rubbing, watching her face slowly relax, pinched look disappearing, “mmmhmm.”

Soft sound in the back of her throat told him to keep going, small circles, occasionally venturing to the round bones surrounding her eyes, the bridge of her nose, up to her hairline. Another ‘hhmmmm’ later, then a deep sigh, she rolled to her back, making his task a little harder, arms more awkward in their reach.

Shifting slightly, arm now across her chest, he continued. Feeling himself drifting off, his thumb movements lighter and slower, he felt her turn her head, face him, “Mulder?”

“Hi.” Rolling towards him once again, her hands slipped under his arm and one palm to his face, she moved forward, kissing him. Shocked, he pulled back after a moment, “are you awake or asleep?”

He saw her suddenly blink, head shake, both signs she was just waking up, “what? Mulder?”

Knowing she didn’t recall anything because there was no embarrassment turning her red, no heat in her cheeks, eyes innocently confused, “nothing. You said something and I thought … I just wasn’t sure if you were awake. Go back to sleep.”

Caught in limbo of dreams and Mulder, she didn’t care, and scooted closer, into his arms, “you are the warmest thing I own.” Snuggling into him, about as up close and personal as they could get fully clothed on a Friday afternoon, “I like it.”

She so totally did own him and he would be perfectly fine declaring that by billboard, sky writer, or booming voice from the sky. Lips to her forehead, he left them there as he agreed, “I do, too.”

&&&&&&&&&

[deliriumsdelight7]

*crams entire chocolate Entenmann’s donut in my mouth*

Tagging whoever wants to play!

Tagged by the wonderful @theresa-of-liechtenstein I'm so so sorries I forgor

Tagging @strollingsquid @discordant-daydreams @iamthesub-librarian @kingscythe @crossnamara

[frozenfriesline]

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[thelostexperiment]

"Inventory Check" one for Susan and one for Mr. B

Mr. B: A Rubix cube, glasses case, ¢87, 2 pens, 6 pencils, 2 erasers, 3 note pads,"neat looking" rock (probably magical without him knowing), "broken vending machine" snacks ["lil Debra's" oatmeal cream-pies, "Dodoritos" Coo-ranch corn chips, "Ladybird-Scout" Cookies "skinny-mintys", "Toaster-Tarts" cinnamon, generic brand Jerky], 13 books [a book of names, "Philosophy and History of Mathematics" volumes 1-9, "Encyclopedia of Raptors", "Julia Chick's Introduction to Cooking", "The Little Prince"]

Susan:

Flashlight, walking stick, (now emptied) water canteen, sleeping bag, laptop (with charger and cable), cell phone, headphones, bag of dice, "Mystic the collecting" card deck, homemade cloak, translation books for different languages, pass port, flying permit, diploma for a two week course from "Acme Air Academy", airplane keys, swiss pocket knife, owl purse with $5.66 in change (and $200 in her shoes), extra clothes, extra shoes, bathroom supplies, first aid kit, map and compass, lighter, sewing/knitting kit, small clay figurines (hand made), duct tape, grandma's book of home remedies and advice, more vending machine snacks ("Solar Chips, "Cheese-Os", peanut butter crackers, "Snookerz" bars), a stack of missing persons posters printed in multiple languages

[softbiker]

Agent 14 Oneshot

Warnings: maybe a couple bad words

Word count: 2.6k

A/N: While this is a continuation of the Steve x Agent 14 series, this particular installment has...almost no Steve lol. Just wanted to warn people before I get in trouble for that. It does, however, feature Agents 41 and 28 (from series written by @nacho-bucky​ and @kentuckybarnes​ )! Also, I plan on expanding and posting the full “menu” of custom drinks that 14 makes for her friends, so stay tuned for that! As always, enjoy and let me know what you think! :)

She squeals when the ad pops up as she’s scrolling through Instagram.

There it is, in all its glory, right between yet another engagement photo and a “no filter” celebrity selfie.

The S’mores Frappucino.

A towering frozen swirl of sweet vanilla and creamy milk chocolate, topped with the most mouth-watering promise of all: marshmallow whipped cream. And all of it dusted with a generous sprinkle of crushed graham cracker pieces. It’s enough to make 41 want to lick her phone screen.

With a flailing little backwards somersault, she rolls herself off the couch and bounds down the hallway towards Clint’s room, tie-dye socks slipping on the freshly polished floors.

“Guess what season it is?” She flings the door open with one hand, brandishing her phone in the other, her grin nearly splitting her face as she bounces up on her toes, eager to see his reaction - only to pull up short, a soft frown dragging her lips back down. The room is empty.

“Tweets?” 41 glances around the room, taking stock of the discarded socks and inside-out jeans littering the floor, a pair of her own boots flung to one corner, a plush sea turtle smiling at her from the bed. There’s a Sharing Size bag of peanut M&M’s on the nightstand, next to an open can of Red Bull, leaving a ring on the cover of last month’s Men’s Health which he’d permanently borrowed from Sam. She looks up at the ceiling - typically he leaves a vent open as a point of entry if he’s been…exploring up there. But no dice. Their vent remains screwed in place.

Shoving her phone in the front pocket of her hoodie, she backtracks towards the kitchen, rounding the corner from the hallway and sliding into the room Risky Business-style. A blazing mid-morning sun floods the room with light through the floor-to-ceiling windows, bouncing off of the metalwork backsplash and casting sparkles across the empty table. Hands on her hips, she huffs to herself, wondering where he’s run off to, before the clinking of glass bottles catches her attention.

Sticking up from the open door of the fridge is a vaguely familiar yoga-panted ass, waving in the air as its owner rummages through the shelves and drawers, muttering under her breath.

“Nat?” The red curls bounce in her ponytail as she stands at the sound of 41’s voice.

“Oh, hey, kid,” Nat smiles, propping a hand on her hip. If she’s at all bothered by the fact that her friend and coworker just got an eyeful of her backside, she hides it all with a poker face she probably mastered in super spy kindergarten. “What are you up to?”

“Just looking for Clint.” 41 pouts. She shifts her weight to one leg, scratching at her ankle with the toe of one sock. “You haven’t seen him have you?”

Natasha’s eyebrows flicker up as she closes the refrigerator with her hip.

“Oh - he didn’t tell you?”

“Tell me what?”

“The boys are all out for the day,” she sighs, rolling her eyes to the ceiling. “Some kind of belated bachelor party for Tony - even though he’s been married for a year, he said he missed out on the experience; so he kidnapped all of our male counterparts for the day.” Nat shrugs one shoulder, smirking. “Frankly the concept seems outdated - and sexist. But when has Tony ever listened to me?”

Nat notices the way her shoulders fall, the way her hands roll up inside the sleeves of her hoodie. Poor thing. And she’d come in here looking so excited, too; now her frown settles too deeply at the corners of her lips, eyes cast somewhere on the floor. Abandoning her search for a snack, Nat slides onto a bar stool at the island, propping her chin in one hand.

“You have any plans for today?” she prompts. She’ll deny it till her dying day, but the formerly made-of-marble assassin feels…soft at her core now. No, not her abs - her backflips are as tight as ever; but somewhere behind her ribs, deeper than her muscles, there’s a marshmallowy give to her now - the press of fingers could leave a dent on her.

And that’s why, God help her, she couldn’t stand the sight of 41’s frown. Couldn’t endure the downcast disappointment in her gaze. Couldn’t walk away from her halfhearted, sighing shrug.

“Not really,” 41 mumbles, licking her bottom lip. “I was just gonna see if Clint wanted to go get Starbucks with me. They’ve got the S’mores drink now.”

Pulling her phone from where it’s tucked into the waistband of her yoga pants, Nat quickly swipes through her messages and pulls up a group chat named ‘No Boys Allowed’.

I’m so gonna regret this, she thinks, but she types up her proposal anyway and taps send. Time to assemble.

 ***********                                                                                                  

The bell over the door dings cheerfully, and 14 fights her inner groan long enough to yell over her shoulder, “Welcome to Starbucks!” She doesn’t turn from the drink in her hands, too afraid of spilling the milk (again) and having to remake this caramel macchiato. Gaze intent on the cup in her hands, she drizzles the sides with caramel, watching the sticky sweet goop glide down the walls of the cup. Satisfied that this should meet the customer’s request for “extra, extra caramel”, she reaches for her milk jug, glancing up from the machine where her espresso shots are queueing.

41 waves ecstatically when she meets her gaze over the espresso machine, a suspiciously casual Nat smirking over her shoulder. Wanda is following close behind them, hands shoved in the pockets of a denim jacket, despite the summer heat. Maria is already standing in front of the register, eyeing the menu, with 28 next to her, a pair of dark sunglasses pushed up on top of her head.

14 blinks.

With quick, nimble fingers, she finishes the drink in front of her and sets it up on the mobile order stand, awaiting the customer. Chase, the barista who should be covering front, is nowhere to be seen; but she doesn’t have any other drinks waiting, so she strides up to the register, tilting a curious brow at her friends.

“Ladies,” 14 smiles, tilting her head to one side. “This is…a nice surprise? A kidnapping? A mission?”

“Relax,” Maria says, punctuated with a good-natured eye roll. “We’re just here for the coffee.”

“Oh, sure,” 14 crosses her arms, leaning a hip against the front counter. “You guys are a little short-staffed, aren’t you? Where’s all the testosterone?”

“Looking for a certain star-spangled specimen?” Nat pipes up. Their group has clustered around the register in a close semicircle. “Boys’ day out. Some kind of adventure that will probably land Tony in the doghouse…but then again, he’s partying with a couple centenarians, so how bad could it be?”

“You’d be surprised,” 28 mutters with a quirk of her eyebrows.

In front of a group of super spies, superheroes, and super intelligent women, 14 fights to put on the best poker face she’s ever had in her life. At the mention of Steve - as well as the news he wouldn’t be joining them - Nat watches her closely; the only sign of her disappointment is the way she purses her lips, eyes flicking towards the door as though she might prove them wrong. And then it’s gone, her eyes turning back to her friends, a beaming, nose-scrunching smile fixed on her face.

“That sounds awful,” she giggles. “But very on-brand for Tony.”

A chorus of assent from the ladies, rolling their eyes and scoffing at the endless supply of evidence they have to that fact.

“Alright so…what can I get you?” 14 prompts. As much as she’d like to stand here, chatting with her friends, she’s still on the clock for another hour and a half - and there’s work to be done. Maybe it stings, chafes her heart a little, that this little outing doesn’t quite include her; that she’ll make their drinks and then they’ll leave, and then more drinks for more people for the rest of her shift. But these customers are more pleasant than most, and it’s not as though she won’t see them later, so she shoves down her insecurity and taps at the screen of the register, opening her till.

“Well we were thinking…” Wanda starts, glancing at Natasha. The two share an amused smirk that 14 doesn’t like at all. “…that maybe you could surprise us?”

“Except me!” 41 raises her hand, bouncing up on the balls of her feet. “I haven’t had a S’mores yet this year, I need one! Please?”

Stunned, 14 looks around the group, cocking one eyebrow.

“So…one S’mores, and then - you all want to be surprised?” What a request - she didn’t trust anyone to make a drink for her…that could really backfire.

“Well, you know us,” Nat shrugged. “You know what we like, what we hate, what we won’t drink…”

“Besides, it never hurts to try something new,” Maria smirks.

Teeth sinking into her bottom lip, a slow smile spreads across 14’s face.

“Alright, ladies, say no more-”

It takes her little more than a minute to line up her plan, squinting at each of her friends in concentration, a Sharpie poised to mark each cup, labeled with a name in her characteristic block-print scrawl. They crane their necks over the tops of the machines, trying to see behind the bar and guess what she’s whipping up back there. Ingredients flit through her hands, shaken into one cup, then exchanged for something else for the next. Syrups, cinnamon, juices, toppings. They try and fail to keep it all straight from one cup to the next, but she’s too fast, hands reaching between two drinks at once.

Finally, with a last look over her shoulder, goofily sticking her tongue from the corner of her mouth, she piles 41’s coveted marshmallow whip on top of her drink and sprinkles the graham cracker topping with a generous hand. 41 barely contains her squeal as she grabs 28’s elbow and points at it.

“That one’s mine! Doesn’t it look amazing?”

One by one, she lines up the drinks at the end of the bar, turning the cups so each name is properly shown.

“Alright, so what am I in for?” Maria cautiously waves her drink under her nose, letting the steam waft up from the small opening in the lid. Hers is a hot drink, its contents concealed in a thick paper cup proudly bearing the same green logo as its cardboard sleeve.

“I thought you wanted to be surprised?” 14 smirks, sliding 41’s frappucino across the bar into her glitter-nailed hands. 28 grabs hers as well, a refreshingly cold…something - she plunges in a straw and swirls the ice as she examines the pale pink color of the drink.

“Well, bottoms up girls,” Nat shrugs, inspecting the layer of foam on top of her drink before raising it to her lips. Wanda taps her cup with 41’s before tipping hers up as well. Standing behind the bar, a rag in her hands, 14 gnaws on her lip as she watches them sip her creations. She shifts her feet as she waits for the verdict.

“Wow.” Wanda’s brows shoot up, tongue flicking over her lip. “This is really good.”

“Yeah,” Maria agrees, going in for her second taste.

“Don’t know why you sound surprised,” 41 says around her straw and a mouthful of whipped cream. “Everything she makes is delicious.”

“Oh, thanks,” 14 brushes off the compliments with a one-shouldered shrug. “If you like it I’ll give you the recipe, so you can order it again?”

Various noises of agreement, all enthusiastic, all from full mouths. She smiles, grabs a blank receipt paper from the register and a pen from the pocket of her apron.

“Okay, so yours Wanda is a double dirty chai with cinnamon…”

  ***********                                                                                                  

Folding her apron over one arm, 14 releases her hair from its butterfly clip and reaches for her backpack. She keeps a spare change of clothes folded neatly in the bottom, in case she has to run errands after work and can’t go out covered in coffee and syrup. The bathroom is empty and she ducks inside, slipping into a pair of cutoff shorts and and a tie-dye t-shirt; her faithful sneakers can make it through work and life, thankfully, so she wiggles her feet back into them, not bothering to untie the laces.

It’s been a long day. And a glance at her watch tells her it’s only…1:09 p.m.

Backpack on one shoulder, sunglasses perched on her head, she makes her way back out of the café, pausing at the end of the bar to get her drink.

“Here, girl.” Jade, the barista who made her drink, smiles as she hands her a straw. “You look like you need this.”

“I feel like I need this.” 14 smiles back as she jams her straw into the cup and takes the first sip. Iced blonde americano, 2 pumps toffee nut, a splash of sweet cream. She makes a small noise of pleasure - hits the spot every time.

“See you tomorrow!” she waves to her coworkers as she backs out the door, dropping her sunglasses down to her face as she steps into the unrelenting summer sun. Not two steps out the door, turning to the street, and she nearly bumps into-

“Nat?”

“Hey, long time no see.” Nat wiggles her fingers in a mocking little wave. The rest of their posse is clustered around a couple of bistro tables haphazardly shoved together outside the café.

“What…you guys are still here?” 14 cocks her head to the side. It’s been over an hour and a half at least, their drinks are sitting empty on the tables in front of them. She had assumed they’d be long gone.

“Well, duh,” 41 grins. “We’re going to lunch! And then - oh, we should get pedicures!”

“Oh, can we go to that new Thai place?” Wanda asks, leaning her elbows on the table. “It’s only a couple blocks down from here.”

“God, the things I would do for some egg rolls right about now-” Maria agrees, patting her stomach.

They start to stand from their tables, the metal chairs scraping loudly against concrete, and 28 gathers the empty cups to throw away in the trash cans next to the door. The group shuffles and chatters, eager at the prospect of lunch; purses and wallets are snatched up, phones tucked back into pockets. Wanda leads the way as they march off in pursuit of pad thai and egg rolls, the rest of the group falling in behind her on the sidewalk. Even in the early afternoon heat, they link arms and laugh and stand too close together, sharing giggles and gossip.

Nat lightly bumps 14 with her shoulder, her green eyes gone pale and glittering in the sun.

“You didn’t really think we’d eat and run on you?” she smirks. “Come on, I’m starving.”

14 ducks her head and grins.

“Just one second-” she says, sliding her phone from her back pocket. She snaps a picture of her drink, then smiles at Nat. “Okay, now we’re good.”

Nat rolls her eyes.

“Wow, that was so basic-”

“Shut up.”

A few minutes later, sitting in a blessedly air-conditioned Thai restaurant, she captions the photo ‘new drink for you to try next time - I highly recommend it’ and hits send.

Somewhere across town, shoved cheek by jowl with his buddies in the back of a stretch limo, the interior vibrating with music and lit with flashing LEDs, a super soldier smiles at his phone.

[be-ready-when-i-say-go]

coloring book by the regrettes with calum :)

Thanks for the suggestion and all your patience! (It’s a black reader insert, and I hope that’s okay! I normally try to keep my reader inserts open-ended on the race front. But I got carried away this time.)

Support me on Ko-fi! It ensures that I can continue to provide this content for you all and helps me save up some cash for my flight out for graduate school! 

Requesting for song blurbs is closed. Thanks for all the love. 

_________________________________________________

A World In Color

If anyone told Calum that he would be sitting on his living room floor surrounded by crayons, printer paper, coloring books, a plush Tweety Bird in his lap and a hyped up on sugar four-year-old and actually enjoying his life, he would’ve laughed a little but made it clear that he was a few years off from all that happening. 

That would’ve been the case. If not for the fact that he is actually surrounded by crayons, printer paper, coloring books, a plus Tweety Bird in his lap, and a four-year-old who is hopped up on life more so than sugar, but the lollipop he snuck her is probably adding to the mixture as well. And he’s actually enjoying his life and her story. 

“But of course he does because he’s mean,” Ysobel continues on. She’s currently explaining the stick figure with some bubble features that is her mother in the middle of an epic battle as the sun sets and her mother has to defeat the dragon burning all of the town’s crop. It’s veered a little from the townspeople and now she’s just bouncing on her feet, talking with her hands, much like her mother and leaning across his coffee table. “I want swords like Mommy. So I can big and strong, and be in movies like her too!”

Calum nods, his own attempts at coloring in the rose he’s doodled, are slowed making sure Ysobel doesn’t get too excited and bump her head on the edge of the coffee table. She did it once today and it still makes Calum’s heart race to see her rolling around so close to the corner. “So what happened to being Tweety Bird?”

“People can’t actually fly, slily. I don’t have wings.”

“You could always make wings, like some sort of wingsuit that helps you fly. You like building stuff.”

Her nod is vigorous and shakes the beads on the ends of her braids. “Mommy said she would paint a wall in my room to look like legos building a tower!” 

Calum had heard of this plan and readily offered his help next week to help execute the plan. “Really? Did you draw the tower by chance?”

Ysobel nods, running over to her backpack situated against the legs of the couch. “Uh-huh, I did like forever ago in arts and crafts time! Mommy was so proud of it!” 

He can only smile, watching her pull out the orange folder and flipping through all the drawings and homework sheets. She looks everything like you. And Calum was used to the whole spiel about how he and his mother looked so much alike, but he could see it between you and Ysobel. He understood it, the same nose, big eyes, and bushy brows. Ysobel’s skin is darker than yours by a good ways but she is absolutely your twin. Ysobel smiled like you too. Whenever the little girl happened to catch him with a big smile, something in his chest always felt a little more at ease. 

And maybe it’s you.  Maybe it’s because whenever he sees Ysobel he knows you weren’t too far behind. Your whole world is her and he adores the love you had for her. There wasn’t a thing you wouldn’t do for her. You had stayed up every night the monsters made her scared. You soothed every tummyache. You cried at every nick and scrap that Ysobel endured. 

Calum would be lying if he said that he hadn’t fantasized for quick moments what it would be like to come home to you and Ysobel. Though she wasn’t his biological, he loved her just the same. Offering to pick her up from school, or be there when she got off the school bus. He bought her little treats, sometimes a toy, sometimes candy. Whenever he got you a bouquet, he ordered a second one with a special note just for Ysobel. 

Calum is so taken with you and Ysobel. You two met by his work. They wanted some fight choreography in a video and by way of a friend of a friend they were recommended to you. At the time, you had given up on too many serious hopes of making it big in the Hollywood realm because of Ysobel and stuck with instructing classes at a dojo and local gigs. You took the occasional job on a movie set or maybe one that took you out of town for a couple weeks but you made sure to keep all your trips short. You didn’t want Ysobel thinking that she would grow up without a father and without a mother that wasn’t present enough. 

While you’re older than he is, it hadn’t mattered. He was still enamored with your skill and beauty. It wouldn’t be the whole truth if Calum didn’t admit that he initially sought after you because of your looks, but soon, watching the way you carried yourself, he knew he was a slippery slope of falling for you. And it’s been a fun trip down.

It took a year before you introduced them. Ysobel knew you were seeing Calum and Calum knew about Ysobel, but there were plenty of dates in your living room late into the evening, within earshot if Ysobel needed you and lunch dates while Ysobel was at her preschool before you were worn down by Ysobel’s curiosity to meet the man that you were dating. Calum could tell you were nervous, sitting on the park bench, fingers wriggling around each other. However, Ysobel was fearless and when approached right after her turn on the slide. She extended her hand, the other one still on her hip, “I’m Ysobel. It’s with a Y, and an O.” 

Calum trying hard to keep the laughter from shaking his body took her hand and shook it. There was no doubt that she was your daughter. He was a goner from the start. 

“May I have a snack, please?” Ysobel, now pressed up into his dining room table with her penmanship workbook nestled in front of her, turns to the kitchen to face Calum.

She knows her routine better than anyone. She comes home, talks about her day, gets half an hour to draw, run around and play before she had to do work. It wasn’t a fun routine in all respects by Ysobel stuck to it, even in her mother’s absence. 

“Of course.” With the fridge opens, he rattles what he has. He’s mindful not to offer a peanut butter and jelly sandwich or not to snack on the can he bought last week because of her allergy. She’s fine with other nuts, but Calum worries and tries his best not to cross-contaminate with any kind of nut to be safe. 

“What kind of apples do you have?”

“Pink ladies,” he grins, knowing those are her favorite. “And I have granny smith as well.”

“Pink lady please!”

“Your wish is my command.” 

“Thanks, Calum! You’re the best.” He’s relieved that the ‘Mr.’ has been dropped. There was nothing faster to make him feel well over his 24 years than when Ysobel called him Mr. Calum for the first two months. It showed her manners of course, but by god, he did not need mister in front of his name for at least another fifteen years. 

There’s a soft clicking as Duke trots over and when Calum turns for just a moment he spies Ysobel slipping out of the seat to pet him. He doesn’t say anything about the work. But when he turns to find her giggling with Duke on her lap, he sets the bowl of diced apples down and shakes his head. “You know you have to do your work.”

“Oh, please, Calum. Duke just wanted some pets.”

“A compromise.” Ysobel sits up straighter, the beads clicking together again. Calum continues. “He sits on your lap while you work. But you have to makes sure he doesn’t eat your apples. He’s a greedy baby grandpa.”

“Deal,” she giggles and climbs back up into the chair. Calum scopes up Duke and then deposits him into her lap. 

The house falls silent, only quickly and quietly cut by Ysobel’s giggles. Calum leans into the counter of the kitchen, watching her work. Duke takes a particular interest in her paper. It warms his chest to watch her diligently work. He could get used to this sight. He wants to get used to this sight. He wants to get Ysobel ready in the morning and he wants to laugh at the way you look before having your morning coffee with tired eyes squinting against the world and the bonnet secure around your head.  

He’s only witnessed that sight once when Ysobel was scoped up by your best friend for the weekend. Saturday morning rolled around and even though Calum’s own internal clock liked to wake him much later in the day, yours woke you up bright and early–as always. He woke with you and when you practically begged him to climb back into your sheets, he simply shook his head and said he was going to spend every second with you that he could consciously. 

“Calum, you never shared your drawing.” It’s an observation Ysobel makes absentmindedly. She sets her pencil down and pushes the workbook to the side of her. For Calum to check over it. He can’t initial her homework page, a rule he didn’t think would end the world if broken. But he respected your wishes and never signed off on the homework. He only checked it over. 

“That cursive is coming along really well, kiddo,” he praises, flipping over the page. It too is lined up with cursive traced and freehanded to put his own handwriting to shame. 

“Thanks.” It’s a chipper tone and he knows without looking there is a smile to match too. 

Calum takes a moment to look over the homework sheet, part of it is to ensure that he’s keeping her on track and the other part is to avoid her question. Ysobel was placed in a gift course. So usually there’s more than Calum remembers having to do at her age. But thankfully, the program doesn’t seem too intense. It worried him just a little when you mentioned it and he wanted her to feel like a kid, not a machine just yet. He even toured the schools with you. The stress of making sure you were doing the best for your child was evident and Calum knew he had to help any way he could. The final decision was always yours but even he had to admit that where she attends now, seemed like the best fit for her ability and age. 

When Calum finds not much left, besides a worksheet, he takes a pause and knows she’ll breeze through that. And if he’s going to show her the picture he drew, then there’s no more homework getting done today. “I’ll tell you after you finish this last thing, okay?”

“No fun.”

“I’m always fun!”

“No, you sound like Mommy.”

He doesn’t want to spoil her now with the question. But he knows he has to ask soon. Ysobel has to be on board with this because if not, it won’t matter. He knows you. If Ysobel is not on board, you won’t be on board. It’s like, when he thinks about his time with you two, that before his life was black and white. Now with you two, it’s full of color and he never wants to lose that. He doesn’t want to ever not see color again. 

“I probably sound like a dad.” Calum tests the water with the statement, just wanting to see how she reacts. There’s a frown that pulls down her face. You and Ysobel both have a more slender nose than Calum but the moment her lips pull down he can already imagine a sniffly red nose. He’s worried about the tears. “Hey, no, I’m sorry.”

Ysobel shakes her head. She looks down at Duke, resting the side of her face into his fur. Calum can see the prickle of tears. “Sometimes I wish I had a dad. Mommy’s great and she can beat up anyone who’s mean to me. But I can’t go to the father-daughter dance.”

“Oh, sweetheart, no, don’t say that. You can go.”

She shakes her head. “I can’t.” The tears are hitting her skin. They tract down her face and Calum takes his thumb to quickly wipe them away. 

“I can go with you if you want to go.”

She smiles, though her chin wobbles. “I lov-like you Calum. But you’re not my dad. It wouldn’t work.”

Calum hears the slip-up and his own tears are forming. He knows he and Ysobel got along well and she was respectful of him just as much as she was able to convince him to be mischievous. All the times he told you that he loved you and your daughter, he truly did mean it. “I love you too Ysobel.” He takes a moment to inhale deeply. “Okay, I’m going to show you want I drew. Hopefully, then, that changes your mind about the father-daughter dance.”

Her brows spell out her confusion but she watches Calum return to the coffee table, dig up the drawings and hold his behind his back. She can only see the red from the crayon and some black but she’s not sure. When Calum returns to the table, squatting again to her level he slides the paper, face down. “So,” he starts, wiping more of her tears. “Your mom and I have been dating for a while.”

“A year and eight months.” Calum nods with a tiny smile. “I asked Mommy once. Now she tells me when every month passes.”

“Yeah, a year and eight months. I’m going to tell you a secret.” Ysobel nods, the tears and sadness seeming to fall away as she perks up to catch all the details. “I’ve wanted to marry your mom for a long time now.” Her eyes light up, and she hugs Duke closer to her body. 

“She wants to marry you too.” The bright eyes widen and she covers her mouth for a moment. He figures that wasn’t supposed to be for his ears just yet. But it’s a relief. “I didn’t tell you that! I didn’t say it.” 

Calum laughs, miming that his lips are zipped close. “I don’t know a thing. But before I can ask your mom, I want to ask you something.”

Before he can exhale, before the words can even think about falling over his lips, Ysobel shrieks. “Does that mean you want to be my dad?” Duke barks, squirming a little and then leaps from her arms. Ysobel lets them fall, heavy into her lap. 

“I do.” He flips over the paper and a red rose in a field of sunflowers looks back up at Ysobel. Written in black sharpie is Calum’s question, May I be your dad? “I do want to be your dad.”

The tears are forming again. Both of them watching the other in watery vision. “Yeah, you’re going to be the best dad ever,” Ysobel whispers before wrapping her arms around Calum’s neck. 

He holds her close, letting the tears fall down his chest. “Thank you, Ysobel. With a Y.”

“And an O,” she finishes. “You do love me.”

“Yes, very much,” Calum says kissing her forehead. 

It takes maybe too much convincing and a promise of ice cream to get Ysobel to finish her work and not call you during your meeting. Normally you were always there to get her off the bus or to pick her up. But this particular meeting had already been rescheduled twice and Calum was more than happy to pick Ysobel up from the bus stop. He had her bus pass so the driver knew she was safe to go with him. From there, it was only a ten-minute drive to his place. He had a key to your place but Ysobel asked about seeing Duke and he couldn’t really say no to her request. 

When you knock at the door, Ysobel grins, so wide he’s sure it’s going to split her full cheeks. You look a little frazzled when he opens the door and he frowns a little. “What’s the matter, baby?”

You fall into his chest. “Long day.”

He hums and gently guides you wrapped around him into the house before shutting the door. His world feels so complete even though you’re sluggish to cross the room and greet Ysobel, he knows this is his whole world in front of him. “Hi, baby.” The kiss to her forehead is overdramatic as always. You fall into the chair next to her. “How was school?”

“Really good. I won in hide and seek during recess!”

You laugh, smoothing over the cornrows. The frizz is showing through, thanks to her wild sleeping and her bonnet always missing in the morning. You’ll have to do something different to her hair here soon. Saturday you have to get the paint for her room and Sunday you’re going to church. Monday’s terrible and you pray that maybe service ends on Sunday early enough to wash it and give her some twists or maybe even space buns. 

“I’m proud,” you hum. “Finish all your homework?”

Ysobel nods, opening to the pages. “Da-Calum looked over it!”

Your eyes widen at her slip and turn to Calum. His back faces the both of you, facing the faucet instead. And you’re pounding heart is thumping in your ears. Maybe he didn’t hear it. You knew she had been down about the upcoming father-daughter dance and you weren’t sure about bringing it up to Calum. He did well with Ysobel but it’s not easy diving into a relationship with someone that as a kid. With Ysobel being so much older you were afraid that she’d ask questions about her dad and Calum. 

“Looks great to me, baby.” You initial the pages and the homework assignment sheet. “What do you want for dinner? Spaghetti? Burgers?” Maybe it was a bad idea to get involved with anyone. Maybe you should’ve just stuck it out with just you and Ysobel. Now Calum would feel pressured and that’s the last thing you needed on your plate today. 

“I can cook if you want,” Calum offers. He keeps his cool but the side glance to Ysobel shows she’s going to crack at any second. 

“Oh, I don’t want to worry you,” you counter, pulling your keys back out of your purse. “You go get your things together, baby.” Ysobel starts to argue but you fix her with a pointed glare and she sighs and nods. 

Calum notices that you’re not looking him in the eye. Once Ysobel leaves the chair, he slips into it. Ysobel fakes a scream, miming something behind your back but Calum tries not to stare for too long. “It’s not a worry, love.”

“Still, I know you probably have things going on. Thanks for watching Ysobel. I really appreciate it.” 

“Please, look at me,” he urges.

“Look what Calum drew for me.” Ysobel’s lifting the picture before Calum can stop her. 

“Belle,” he sighs, shoulders turning down. “You promised to let me actually ask the question first.” 

“You weren’t doing anything!” She argues. “Mommy was going to make us leave before you could ask.”

And you hear them bickering but all you can do is stare down at the beautiful vibrant picture. You always felt like you and Calum were down the path to be serious. But your doubts were always crawling up into your brain. They were always trying to put a cloud of the rainbow forming. But seeing Calum asking Ysobel if she was okay with this, seeing him take that much thought about your daughter, it makes you weep. 

Full-on sobs crush your chest in their wake to be free of your chest. As the first one crosses your throat, both of them look up to you. You clutch the picture to your chest, tears falling from your eyes. “Oh my god.”

Calum sets Ysobel back down, after jokingly picking her up to attack her with tickles and kneels next to you. “What’s wrong?”

“I-You-,” the words don’t ever fully form.  The sentences are too jumbled to come out. 

He brings your head into his chest and quietly shushes. You do your best to swallow down the sobs and you do have a moment’s clarity to put the picture down as to not ruin it. Calum feels you shaking in his arms and he can only pray that you find peace soon. 

It comes but not without a few tissues and Ysobel climbing into your lap. “I love you,” he whispers, cupping your face. “And I love Ysobel too. You guys are my world. It’s like seeing in color with you two around. Marry me, please?”

“Do I get a picture too?” you joke, voice a little hoarse from the crying.

Calum grins but pulls the box from his pocket. “I think a ring is better. So that’s a yes?”

“Yes, Calum. That’s a yes.” He slips it on, kissing you gingerly. “I want a picture too though.”

“Yeah, Mommy deserves a picture too. But with all three of us. As a family.”

Calum kisses Ysobel’s forehead again. “Sounds like a job for you and your crayons, huh?”

“You got it! I’m on the case.” 

-H

[nxtawitch]

Muse’s Aesthetics  !!

                         BOLD any which apply to your muse!                        Remember to REPOST! Feel free to add to the list!

[ COLORS ] red. brown. orange. yellow. green. blue. purple. pink. black. white. teal. silver. gold. grey. lilac. metallic. matte. royal blue. strawberry red. charcoal grey. forest green. apple red. navy blue. crimson. cream. mint green. lavender. copper. turquoise. amber. magenta. midnight. jade green. neon yellow. neon green. tan.

[ ELEMENTS ] fire. ice. water. air. earth. metal. spirit. rain. snow. wind. moon. stars. sun. heat. cold. steam. frost. lightning. sunlight. moonlight. dawn. dusk. twilight. midnight. sunrise. sunset. dewdrops. [ BODY ] claws. long fingers. fangs. teeth. wings. tails. lips. bare feet. freckles. bruises. canine. acne. scars. scratches. wounds. burns. spikes. fur. feathers. scales. webs. eyes. hands. tongue. sweat. tears. feline. chubby-faced. curvy. short. tall. busty. normal height. muscular. makeup. piercing. tattoos. dimples. plastic surgery. dyed hair. painted nails. amputation. 

[ WEAPONS ] fists. brass knuckles. sword. dagger. spear. arrow. hammer. shield. poison. guns. axes. throwing axes. whips. knives. throwing knifes. pepper sprays. tasers. machine guns. slingshots. katanas. maces. staffs. wands. powers. magical items. magic. rocks. mud balls. claws. razors. fighting fans. 

[ MATERIALS ] gold. silver. platinum. titanium. diamonds. pearls. rubies. sapphires. emeralds. amethyst. opal. topaz. jade. agate. bismuth. geodes. metal. iron. rust. steel. glass. wood. porcelain. paper. wool. fur. faux fur. lace. leather. silk. satin. velvet. denim. linen. cotton. charcoal. clay. stone. asphalt. brick. marble. granite. dust. glitter. blood. dirt. mud. smoke. ash. shadow. carbonate. rubber. synthetics. fool’s gold. fossils. sea glass. 

[ NATURE ] grass. leaves. pine trees. maple trees. palm trees. bark. roses. daisies. tulips. lavender. lilies. hibiscus. petals. thorns. seeds. vines. roots. hay. sand. rocks. flowers. ocean. river. meadow. forest. desert. tundra. savanna. swamps. rainforest. petrichor. caves. underwater. coral reef. beach. waves. space. clouds. mountains. shooting stars. rainbows. auroras. fjords. canyons. floods. droughts. thunderstorms. tornadoes. hurricanes. tsunamis. volcanoes. earthquakes. blizzards. meteors. constellations. comets. planets. seashells. driftwood. 

[ ANIMALS ] lions. tigers. bears. wolves. eagles. owls. falcons. hawks. swans. snakes. turtles. ducks. bugs. spiders. birds. whales. dolphins. fish. sharks. horses. zebras. giraffes. cats. dogs. bunnies. cows. sheep. pigs. goats. frogs. snails. praying mantises. butterflies. bees. wasps. crows. ravens. parrots. peacocks. mice. rats. hamsters. lizards. werewolves. unicorns. pegasus. phoenix. dragons. foxes. llamas. camels. 

[FOODS/DRINKS ] sugar. salt. candy. bubblegum. wine. champagne. hard liquor. beer. coffee. tea. kombucha. spices. herbs. apple. orange. lemon. lime. cherry. pineapple. strawberry. watermelon. cranberry. bananas. mango. coconut. pomegranate. vegetables. fruits. meat. fish. pies. cakes. desserts. chocolate. vanilla. hazelnut. peppermint. cream. caramel. berries. nuts. cinnamon. popcorn. pretzels. soda. burgers. burritos. pizza. pasta. ambrosia. lasagna. peanut butter. curry. bacon. soup. cheese. avocado. 

[ HOBBIES ] music. art. watercolors. gardening. smithing. sculpting. painting. sketching. fighting. thievery. writing. composing. cooking. sewing. cosplay. training. dancing. acting. singing. martial arts. self-defense. electronics. technology. blogging. vlogging. cameras. video cameras. video games. computer. phone. movies. theatre. libraries. books. magazines. cds. records. vinyls. cassettes. piano. violin. guitar. electronic guitar. bass guitar. harmonica. harp. woodwinds. brass. bells. sitar. keyboard. drums. percussion. marching band. drama. playing cards. poker chips. chess. dice. motorcycle riding. eating. climbing. running. partying. 

[ STYLE ] lingerie. armor. cape. dress. tunic. vest. blazer. shirt. boots. sneakers. slip-ons. sandals. heels. leggings. trousers. jeans. shorts. skirt. jewelry. earrings. necklace. bracelet. ring. pendant. hat. crown. circlet. helmet. scarf. brocade. cloaks. corsets. doublet. chest plate. gorget. bracers. belt. sash. coat. jacket. hood. gloves. socks. masks. cowls. braces. tie. watches. glasses. sun glasses. visor. eye contacts. makeup. bowties. canes. bows. 

[ MUSIC ] rock. pop. jazz. rap. r&b. hip-hop. funk. alternative. classical. trance. dubstep. edm. ebm. hardstyle. blues. latin. k-pop. j-pop. ambient. new age. metal. world fusion. dancehall. reggae. soca. punk. ska. singer-songwriter. folk. country. bluegrass. swing. opera. show tunes. a capella. minimalist. avant-garde. new wave. disco. baroque. symphonic metal. soundtrack. vaporwave. glitch. house. chillout. psychedelic rock. post-rock. cabaret. trip-hop. easy listening. trap. nightcore. indie. grunge. contemporary. black metal. metalcore. emo. screamo. rockabilly. parody. industrial. electro pop. 

[ MISC ] balloons. bubbles. fireworks. reflections. cityscape. cathedral. mosque. light. dark. candles. war. peace. money. power. percussion. clocks. photos. mirrors. pets. diary. fairy lights. madness. sanity. sadness. happiness. optimism. pessimism. loneliness. family. friends. assistants. co-workers. partner. enemies. loyalty. smoking. drugs. kindness. love. hugs. kisses. lies. angels. demons. fairies. elves. gnomes. 

Tagged by: @bloodofthefates​

Tagging: Anyone! 

[bloodofthefates]

STIORRA

 Muse’s Aesthetics  !!

                          BOLD any which apply to your muse!                         Remember to REPOST! Feel free to add to the list!

[ COLORS ] red. brown. orange. yellow. green. blue. purple. pink. black. white. teal. silver. gold. grey. lilac. metallic. matte. royal blue. strawberry red. charcoal grey. forest green. apple red. navy blue. crimson. cream. mint green. lavender. copper. turquoise. amber. magenta. midnight. jade green. neon yellow. neon green. tan.

[ ELEMENTS ] fire. ice. water. air. earth. metal. spirit. rain. snow. wind. moon. stars. sun. heat. cold. steam. frost. lightning. sunlight. moonlight. dawn. dusk. twilight. midnight. sunrise. sunset. dewdrops. [ BODY ] claws. long fingers. fangs. teeth. wings. tails. lips. bare feet. freckles. bruises. canine. acne. scars. scratches. wounds. burns. spikes. fur. feathers. scales. webs. eyes. hands. tongue. sweat. tears. feline. chubby-faced. curvy. short. tall. busty. normal height. muscular. makeup. piercing. tattoos. dimples. plastic surgery. dyed hair. painted nails. amputation. [ WEAPONS ] fists. brass knuckles. sword. dagger. spear. arrow. hammer. shield. poison. guns. axes. throwing axes. whips. knives. throwing knifes. pepper sprays. tasers. machine guns. slingshots. katanas. maces. staffs. wands. powers. magical items. magic. rocks. mud balls. claws. razors. fighting fans. [ MATERIALS ] gold. silver. platinum. titanium. diamonds. pearls. rubies. sapphires. emeralds. amethyst. opal. topaz. jade. agate. bismuth. geodes. metal. iron. rust. steel. glass. wood. porcelain. paper. wool. fur. faux fur. lace. leather. silk. satin. velvet. denim. linen. cotton. charcoal. clay. stone. asphalt. brick. marble. granite. dust. glitter. blood. dirt. mud. smoke. ash. shadow. carbonate. rubber. synthetics. fool’s gold. fossils. sea glass. [ NATURE ] grass. leaves. pine trees. maple trees. palm trees. bark. roses. daisies. tulips. lavender. lilies. hibiscus. petals. thorns. seeds. vines. roots. hay. sand. rocks. flowers. ocean. river. meadow. forest. desert. tundra. savanna. swamps. rainforest. petrichor. caves. underwater. coral reef. beach. waves. space. clouds. mountains. shooting stars. rainbows. auroras. fjords. canyons. floods. droughts. thunderstorms. tornadoes. hurricanes. tsunamis. volcanoes. earthquakes. blizzards. meteors. constellations. comets. planets. seashells. driftwood. [ ANIMALS ] lions. tigers. bears. wolves. eagles. owls. falcons. hawks. swans. snakes. turtles. ducks. bugs. spiders. birds. whales. dolphins. fish. sharks. horses. zebras. giraffes. cats. dogs. bunnies. cows. sheep. pigs. goats. frogs. snails. praying mantises. butterflies. bees. wasps. crows. ravens. parrots. peacocks. mice. rats. hamsters. lizards. werewolves. unicorns. pegasus. phoenix. dragons. foxes. llamas. camels. [FOODS/DRINKS ] sugar. salt. candy. bubblegum. wine. champagne. hard liquor. beer. coffee. tea. kombucha. spices. herbs. apple. orange. lemon. lime. cherry. pineapple. strawberry. watermelon. cranberry. bananas. mango. coconut. pomegranate. vegetables. fruits. meat. fish. pies. cakes. desserts. chocolate. vanilla. hazelnut. peppermint. cream. caramel. berries. nuts. cinnamon. popcorn. pretzels. soda. burgers. burritos. pizza. pasta. ambrosia. lasagna. peanut butter. curry. bacon. soup. cheese. avocado. [ HOBBIES ] music. art. watercolors. gardening. smithing. sculpting. painting. sketching. fighting. thievery. writing. composing. cooking. sewing. cosplay. training. dancing. acting. singing. martial arts. self-defense. electronics. technology. blogging. vlogging. cameras. video cameras. video games. computer. phone. movies. theatre. libraries. books. magazines. cds. records. vinyls. cassettes. piano. violin. guitar. electronic guitar. bass guitar. harmonica. harp. woodwinds. brass. bells. sitar. keyboard. drums. percussion. marching band. drama. playing cards. poker chips. chess. dice. motorcycle riding. eating. climbing. running. partying. [ STYLE ] lingerie. armor. cape. dress. tunic. vest. blazer. shirt. boots. sneakers. slip-ons. sandals. heels. leggings. trousers. jeans. shorts. skirt. jewelry. earrings. necklace. bracelet. ring. pendant. hat. crown. circlet. helmet. scarf. brocade. cloaks. corsets. doublet. chest plate. gorget. bracers. belt. sash. coat. jacket. hood. gloves. socks. masks. cowls. braces. tie. watches. glasses. sun glasses. visor. eye contacts. makeup. bowties. canes. bows. [ MUSIC ] rock. pop. jazz. rap. r&b. hip-hop. funk. alternative. classical. trance. dubstep. edm. ebm. hardstyle. blues. latin. k-pop. j-pop. ambient. new age. metal. world fusion. dancehall. reggae. soca. punk. ska. singer-songwriter. folk. country. bluegrass. swing. opera. show tunes. a capella. minimalist. avant-garde. new wave. disco. baroque. symphonic metal. soundtrack. vaporwave. glitch. house. chillout. psychedelic rock. post-rock. cabaret. trip-hop. easy listening. trap. nightcore. indie. grunge. contemporary. black metal. metalcore. emo. screamo. rockabilly. parody. industrial. electro pop. [ MISC ] balloons. bubbles. fireworks. reflections. cityscape. cathedral. mosque. light. dark. candles. war. peace. money. power. percussion. clocks. photos. mirrors. pets. diary. fairy lights. madness. sanity. sadness. happiness. optimism. pessimism. loneliness. family. friends. assistants. co-workers. partner. enemies. loyalty. smoking. drugs. kindness. love. hugs. kisses. lies. angels. demons. fairies. elves. gnomes. Tagged by: stolen from: @bubblegumxveil​ Tagging: @nxtawitch​ & anyone!