#p3 timeloop au

[nero-vanderwolf]

Mitsuru stands on the rooftop, cold wind whipping her hair away from her face. It’s always peaceful up here- whenever she has free time outside of studying or fencing, she comes up here. Just for a few moments. Up here, she can let go of her responsibilities. Just for a moment. 

For just a moment, she isn’t a member of S.E.E.S. For a moment, she isn’t the heiress to the Kirijo Group. For a moment, she isn’t Kirijo-senpai. 

For a moment, she’s just Mitsuru, an eighteen year old who had lost track of time and her thoughts. For a moment, she’s just another face in a sea of strangers, simply going about her daily life in the face of all her anxieties. For a moment, she’s content to simply be... someone. No one important. Just another face. 

But then Yuki comes up to the rooftop, his footsteps hurried, and all the weight of the world comes crashing back onto her shoulders. She starts towards him, intending to ask him why he’s up so late and fully expecting him to return the question. 

She doesn’t expect the fall. 

It feels as though her soul has been yanked out of her body. Someone is screaming with her voice, someone’s pulling her away from the edge, someone else is puppeteering her legs for her as she flies down the many flights of stairs two at a time to the ground, punching numbers into her phone with trembling hands as she bolts out of the door to the back. 

Akihiko ended up at her side at some point in the run, taking his phone from her to talk to the emergency services while she skids on her knees beside Yuki- never mind the blood that blossoms to the surface of her skin as she does. 

He’s sprawled on his side in the grass, quivering like a wounded animal. His hair looks damp and matted, and she barely bites back a retch at the idea of what it could be. Still, she gently runs her fingers through his hair as she shifts his head into her lap. He’s bleeding all over her uniform. She doesn’t care. 

He curls up into himself, his eyelids fluttering. “Mitsuru-senpai...” He whispers. His voice is weak, tremulous. He turns his head to look up at her- his cold eyes shiny with tears. This is the first time she’s seen him scared, seen him crying. Mitsuru knows he’s just two years younger than her, but he looks so much like a terrified child, hands stained with the blood of an innocent woman he didn’t mean to kill- 

A scared child. That’s what they all are, in the end, isn’t it? They’re all just scared children. 

“Mitsuru-senpai,” Makoto Yuki whispers again, “am I going to die?” 

Mitsuru lifts his body so she’s hugging him close, and presses a kiss to his blood-damp hair. Like she used to do when Akihiko woke up from a nightmare about his sister, or when Shinjiro was having a particular rough day. She hugs him close and kisses his hair, and a single sob escapes her lips. 

Makoto takes her lack of response with all the solemnity of a man at the gallows. He is. 

“I didn’t want you to see... I’m sorry,” he mumbles, and she grips the cloth of his pyjamas as though it could keep him anchored to this life. As though that alone could save him. He’s dying, and his last words are an apology. 

“You don’t need to apologise. You have nothing to be sorry for,” she whispers. She has reason to apologise, to beg forgiveness. She should have tried to be there more, should have asked if he wanted to share the responsibility of being leader, if he even wanted to join S.E.E.S in the first place- 

“I’m tired, Misturu-senpai...” Makoto mumbles, and she cups his cheek with her hand. He looks peaceful, despite everything. She wipes the earth and blood from his face as best she can. He smiles at the effort, and she knows she would do anything to have seen that smile in a different light, in a better situation. 

“Go to sleep, then. We’ll be here when you wake up,” she chokes out, as though she’s speaking to a sleepy child who doesn’t want to miss something with the adults. He nods, resting against her shoulder. 

Mitsuru spends an hour sobbing over his body. 

She jolts awake in the middle of the night, hands grasping for a boy that isn’t there. Her pillow and face are wet with tears, and she covers her mouth with her hands to stifle a sob. She would swear she could still smell the dirt and blood, still feel the tackiness of his hair as she combed her fingers through it. She could still hear laboured breathing, still feel the weight of a head against her shoulder. 

She spends the rest of the night grieving a still-living boy. 

PUNCHING THE WALLS OF MY ENCLOSURE??? this might be my favorite one yet holy moly. love the disorientation, like mitsuru couldnt even control herself, it was just instinct after he jumped. just pure adrenaline. fear. and ohgghh the way she comforts him... like how she would comfort akihiko. THE KISS?? THE HUG?? COMFORTING HIM LIKE A TIRED KID?? GUHHH... and they're just kids. they're kids and they have to go through this shit.

and of course the loop at the end. fuuuckkk...

[lolo3hwriting]

Persona 3/4/5 Fic Recommendations

A list of persona fics from ao3 that I particularly like and highly recommend to others. Not in any particular order

Daredevil, You’ve Hit A Wall - P5 Strikers where Sumire and Akechi appear in the story. One of my favorites, mostly focuses on Joker but has perspectives from all of the phantom thieves and lots of introspection. Also has a sequel for P5 Tactica

By @/ez-cookie on tumblr

Pleasant Boy - P5 Royal where Akechi gets taken by Maruki and turns into the polite detective prince, with the phantom thieves trying to revert him.

By @/ez-cookie on tumblr

The Definition of Insanity - P3 Timeloop where P3 Protag is stuck in a timeloop with Ryoji. One day, Kotonoe shows up and throws everything off

By @/BkZa555 on twitter

Double the Hope - P5 and P4 crossover where Yu helps Akria by erasing his criminal record and they take down the conspiracy together 

By Novirp13 on ao3

Is That Really How the World Should Be? - P5 and P4 crossover, Ren took Yaldaboath’s deal and the Investigation Team/Shadow Operatives comes together to figure out what’s going on

By Aurelius_Carlan on ao3

I’m Sitting Right Behind You (And Definitely Not Peeking) - A P4 and P5 crossover chatfic/regular fic where Rise is Joker’s classmate and watches the events of the P5 game unfold, with a few twists

By @/prettypinklass on tumblr

Someone Else’s Soul - Joker summons DLC personas and speaks with their original owners in his dreams. Sweet and hilarious at the same time

By @/prettypinklass on tumblr

Marigolds - P5 Akechi gets sent back in time to get another chance at life after dying in the boiler room. Has his own fool’s journey complete with new social links and palaces. A very long fic, but all of it is very good

By Colbub on ao3

Leave Out All The Rest - Part of a NG+ protagonist au where the P3/4/5 protags go back in time. In this instance, Ren is genderfluid and adopts Akechi and tries to be a good parent. Also part of a whumptober 2020 collection that is also pretty good

By Missingwings on ao3

Life, Death, and the Events Between - Collection of fics from Ryomina week 2023. I particularly like Days 3/5, themed around a flower gifts leading up to a date and a school drama play respectively

By Missingwings on ao3

Can Shadows Find Love in the TV World? - P4 Shadow Kanji and Yu have a sweet conversation with each other. Author also has several other fics about the shadows interacting with each other 

By Unknown_Art on ao3

[nero-vanderwolf]

Junpei Iori is sixteen when he meets Makoto. 

Almost immediately after, weird shit starts happening. People turn into coffins around him, the moon turns green, and blood splatters from an unknown source at his feet. It gets all over his shoes and pants. It’s no wonder Sanada-senpai found him crying in the convenience store like a wimp. He would never admit it, but he kind of is. 

A bright side to the weird shit is the fact that he moved into the dorm the others all lived in- and that he can fight the weird blob creatures that they call Shadows. 

A downside is that Makoto is the leader. Always. The leader. 

It sucks, sure, but Junpei knows better than to try and fuck off on his own in the tower. Who knows what could be waiting for him there? Shadows and monsters galore, probably. 

Yeah. Better safe than sorry. Even if safe is a really crappy situation. 

Junpei wants to hate Makoto. He really, truly, sincerely does. He wishes he could punch the stupid blank expression off of that bastard’s face, wishes he could toss him around just to see him show any sort of emotion. 

He realises he can’t hate him when he hears glass shattering, and his first instinct is to check on him. 

Makoto stands in his room, staring at the broken mirror on the floor. Maybe it’s just the dim light of the moon outside, but the guy looks pale. Like, unnervingly pale. He isn’t normally white as a damn sheet. Is he? 

Makoto’s eyes dart up to Junpei’s, and he swallows visibly. Gesturing weakly towards the mess, he struggles for words for a minute. He doesn’t normally struggle with speaking. He just doesn’t do it. 

“I’ll be right back,” he mumbles, and staggers past Junpei like he’s drunk. It’s concerning, to say the least. 

So Junpei makes the decision to follow him. Just to make sure he doesn’t hurt himself, he thinks. Just to make sure everything is hunky dorey in Makoto-land. 

Everything is not fine. Nothing is fine, it’s all gone to shit, he can barely breathe- 

He watched Makoto fucking fall off the goddamn roof and he did nothing. He could have gone after him, could have offered to help clean up the glass, could have- 

Kirijo-senpai grips his arm like a vice, her shiny nails digging into his skin. It hurts like a bitch, but it’s nothing compared to whatever Makoto must be feeling right now. If he can feel anything at all anymore. 

Junpei is going to be sick. He’s going to be sick and he feels like he’s going to die because he can’t fucking breathe- 

Distantly, he can hear the others rushing up to the roof to check out the commotion. He doesn’t care. He just watched a friend fall to his death. 

And goddammit, that’s what Makoto was. Forget the fucking Dark Hour, forget the fucking shadows. Makoto was a friend, and Junpei’s last real interaction with him was him being an ass. 

He doesn’t know if he’ll ever forgive himself for this. He doesn’t think he can. 

He sinks to his knees on the cold concrete, staring at his hands. His vision is fading. He’s definitely blacking out. 

The last thing he thinks is how maybe, if he wishes hard enough, Makoto will be brought back. 

Then it all fades to darkness, and Junpei Iori is lost to the nothingness of a loop’s end. 

Junpei jerks awake, safe and warm in his bed. The sun is shining outside, and the birds are singing. A glance at his calendar tells him it’s summer break, and a glance at his hands tells him it was nothing but a nightmare. 

And yet, somehow, it felt horrifically real. Like he could actually feel the concrete under his knees, like he could actually smell and feel Makoto brushing past him on his way to the roof. Like Makoto really had fallen- 

He stands up, hurrying to get dressed. There’s no point in dwelling on weird dreams, he knows this. He’s had them before- odd senses of deja vú, like he’s seen or felt something before, like he’s had the same conversation time and time again. 

But that’s all it is. A bad case of deja vú. 

Nothing more. Nothing less. 

OHHH AAHGGHH NOT JUNPEI!!! AAAAAAA hes getting trapped in the timeloop too AHHH also this loop was seemingly very early unless im reading wrong. and quick. i feel like makoto is just losing it. hes just growing more hopeless every loop and resetting more often. :( guhh why cant they have a break..