#p: podrick tyrion

[stormborns]

GAME OF THRONES 4.03, Breaker of Chains

[catsteeth]

Sugar & Violence

Podrick Payne x reader 

+:✿ Chapter 3 ✿:+ : Waves Of Emotion

Chapters: 1 | 2 | _ | 4

Summary: You’re a Mormont being held hostage by House Lannister.  You are acting now as the Handmaiden for Margery Tyrell, whom you’ve grown quite close with. But it seems that a squire has caught your attention as you have caught his. 

CW: afab reader, SMUT, MDNI, Oral (Mutual), unprotected P in V sex, praise, insanely sweet fluff, mention of alcohol consumption, mention of NSFW themes.

Word Count: 5125 

꒰ ୨୧ ─ ・┈ ・ ─ ・┈ ─ ・┈ ─ ・┈ ꒱꒱

It had been some time since your night with Podrick. 

Since then you and he rarely had a moment together alone longer than a few moments. On the walks back from Tyrion's chambers you would speak quietly. About anything. And when you arrived at your chamber if there were no one around you would kiss him. However, that was all. 

Ever since Margery and Joffrey were engaged, your moments together had grown fewer and far between. 

Tonight was the wedding of Lord Tyrion and Lady Sansa. One that you knew was not going to be a happy one. But with this wedding on the way it would seem Margerys was becoming closer. With her as queen you’d be free soon enough. 

“What was it like?” Margery asked as she rummaged through her gowns in her wardrobe. 

“He finished me first. No man has ever done that.” You said as laid on a lounge chair while you chewed on some grapes.

“If you were paid to do it, would you refuse the money?” She said not turning her attention away from the dresses in front of her. 

“I never refuse money.” You said as you plucked another grape off its vine. 

“Do you believe another would?” She asked looking back at you,

“Perhaps.” You looked at the grape vine you stripped clean. You realized you’d no interest in disclosing any intimate details about Podrick. As if it were a betrayal to him. You changed the subject as you threw the bare grape vine onto a tray next to you. “What was your evening with Joffrey like?”

She looked back at the dresses in front of her. “Enchanting as always.” She said sarcastically, “Let's change the subject shall we?” She spun around holding two dresses, “Black or Red?”

“We already dressed you.” You said with a raised eyebrow

“This one is for you.” She said with a smirk

“I have to come to that repulsive ceremony?” You whined

“You are my lady,”

“I am your handmaiden.” You corrected her,

“And I wish for you to be with me during such a repulsive ceremony.” She held the dresses up higher trying to direct your attention back to them. 

“No green?” You pout your lips. 

“It’s a Lannister wedding, you are fortunate I am not making you wear gold. Or perhaps one of those terrible wrapped gowns Cersei wears.” You continued to pout and she felt the need to convince you, “Joffrey already does not like all the green you wear.” She sighed

“Black.” You conceded, at least black was the second color of your house. 

Margery buttoned and tied you into the gown. she turned you around and rested her chin on your shoulder as you looked into the mirror. 

“You are going to need moon tea after that boy sees you tonight.” 

“No need, he won’t finish in me. He says he does not want to “sully my body”” You said the last part in a mocking tone

“He said that?” Her eyes widened and you nodded, “I’d say he does love you.” 

“No, he doesn’t” You shook your head. 

꒰ ୨୧ ─ ・┈ ・ ─ ・┈ ─ ・┈ ─ ・┈ ꒱꒱

The ceremony was as droll as you imagined. 

However it did once again give you an opportunity to dance and drink. 

As the night went on you tried your best to get on with the things that brought you joy, like drinking and dancing however none of them were helping. You danced from man to man, all of them pleasant enough but none of them made you feel the way Podrick did. 

You looked around the room that night and saw Podrick standing behind Tyrion’s wedding table. He was dressed somewhat nicer than normal, wearing a cape. He stood there with his arms crossed and a timid yet stoic expression. As soon as your eyes found him, his eyes met yours. 

You took a break from dancing and grabbed a chalice of wine. You made your way over to Podrick, once he noticed this he stood up straighter.

“Podrick,” You said with a slight nod, greeting him. 

“Lady (Y/N),” He looked flustered, “You look beautiful.” He said softly

“It’s Lady Margery's dress,” You said, running your hands over the fabric of the gown.

“No, I meant you.” He said softer, and your eyes went back to him. “I would like to ask you for a dance, really I would but I cannot leave my Lord.” He said, keeping his eyes low as if he were disappointed in himself.

“I see,” You said looking over to Tyrion, who was drowning himself in his cups. “He seems to be enjoying himself. In one way or another I suppose.” You said with a smirk, making Podrick smile “Besides, I have grown tired of dancing. Hardly seems appropriate.” You said into your chalice.

“How do you mean?” He asked 

“Does this appear to be a happy or willing union?” You asked as your eyes wandered from the drunk older lord to the young to the miserable young lady.

“Well I-“ He began but was interrupted by the shouting of Joffrey. 

“Come, everyone! Time for the bedding ceremony!” Joffrey shouted pulling Sansa along with him

“Bedding ceremony, a great joke.” You said sarcastically lower.

“There will be no bedding ceremony.” Tyrion said,

“Where is your respect for tradition, uncle? Come everyone pick her up and take her to her wedding bed, rid her of her gown she won't be needing it any longer.” Joffrey commanded Podrick however took a step backwards, 

“Ladies attend to my uncle, he’s not heavy.” Joffrey said mockingly

“There will be no bedding ceremony.” Tyrion reaserted.

“There will be if I command it!” Joffrey Shouted back,

“Then you will be fucking your own bride with a wooden cock!” Tyrion shouted as he stabbed the table with his knife.

As the tension grew, Podrick slowly moved his arm in front of you and gently pushed you behind him. You were unsure of how he planned to protect you if anything did happen but the gesture made you feel a warmth growing in your belly. 

You stood behind Podrick, standing closer to his back as you watched the exchange dwindle out. As Tywin was able to play Tyrion’s justified rage filled outburst as a joke and drunken foolishness. 

Tyrion eventually got up and began to walk away with his new bride. 

As the two of them walked off, you leaned toward over Podricks shoulder and whispered in his ear, “Not quite a happy union, would you say?” 

You then walked past him and out of the feasting hall. 

The scene that played out in front of you made you feel sick. How Joffrey's cruelty may lay dormant towards Margery for now it may not forever.

꒰ ୨୧ ─ ・┈ ꒱꒱

You went for a walk outside. Walking along the stone walls that stand beside the ocean sea. You took in the sounds of the sea, how comforting it was to hear. It reminded you of the Island, how the ocean wrapped around it beautifully. You held yourself tightly as the cold air blew past. 

“Are you running away?” Podrick’s voice beckoned uncharacteristically loud, it made you jump. You turned around and saw him standing there, like a scared puppy.

“You scared me!” You clenched your neck, 

Podrick walked closer towards you, “I am sorry- are you leaving?” He reiterated his question,

“No, no I’m not.” You relaxed a bit, walking closer to him, “How’d you find me?” You questioned.

“I-I-” He stammered

“Were you following me?” You asked with narrow eyes.

“I wanted to be sure you got to your room safely.” He kept his eyes low

“I can ensure my own safety.” You said, still a little angry how he scared you.

“I know, I know you can, I’m sorry.” He said about to leave you, 

“Podrick,” You said as you walked to him, grabbing ahold of his arm, “It’s alright, I’m sorry. I was only frightened.” 

“I didn’t want to scare you,” He said as his hand found yours, “I just saw you out here and I-” He stammered again, “I thought you might be leaving.” 

“I’m not. I needed to get away for a moment.” You pulled him along, walking along the water. “The water calms me.”

“Reminds you of home?” He asked softly. 

You nodded, “I miss it terribly.” 

“I’m glad you’re not leaving.” he pulled your arm closer, pulling you closer. “I’m sorry I did not dance with you tonight.” He looked at you, his eyes were deep and loving, it scared you.

“I didn’t ask you to,” You say, looking away from his gaze.

“No but I regret not doing it.” 

“You had a duty.” You say lowering your head, before looking back at him “Besides, you still can.” 

“Now?” He asked as he stopped walking.

“Why not?” You smiled softly,

“There's no music-” He began as you pulled him closer in front of you, wrapping one of your arms around his neck and the other taking his hand.

“There is, there is the sound of the ocean.” You said as you rested your head on his shoulder. His hand found your waist as you both swayed together. Using the sounds of the waves to keep your rhythm. 

“I know nothing of your life.” You said sweet and soft into his ear. 

“I told you, I squired for ser-” 

“I know that but I don’t know about your life. Before all of that.” 

“Not much to say I fear. I mean there is, but it's not interesting.” He stammered slightly as your hand trailed across his back, “I was born in the Westlands. My father died in Greyjoy’s Rebellion, my mother left when I was young. I was taken in by my cousin.”

“Was he kind to you?” You asked sweetly into his ear as you continued to sway back and forth.

“I suppose he gave me shelter. I did things for him, tended his horses, cleaned his mail-”

“You were his squire.” 

He couldn’t argue with it, it was true. 

“I had a dog, Hero.” His voice was softer than velvet.

“Was he one?”

“No, but he was a good dog.” 

“Do you ever miss it? Your home?” You asked as you let go of his hand, wrapping both arms now around his neck.

“No. I didn’t really have one, I mean I did but… I didn’t.”

“You must think I’m silly for wanting to leave mine.” You lifted your head from his shoulder, now having the courage to look him in the eye.

“I wouldn’t think that. But I am curious as to why you did.”

“When you’re on the Island, they believe there is nothing outside of it. Nothing of value or beauty. Life there had become dull, but I miss it. The dull is comfortable.” You said with a sadness in your voice,

“What was it like?” He asked you, wanting to know more about you desperately. 

“I’ve told you, cold and dark.” You smirked,

“No, not the Island, your life. What kind of clothes did you wear, what did you do everyday, what kind of foods did you eat, who did you know?” He asked you softly

“Well,” You sighed, “I wore much more than this,” You looked down at your dress. “Furs, leathers, armors,” 

“I’d like to see you in that.” He said with a uncharacteristically confident smirk,

“Would you?” You said with a flirtatious smile.

“Mhm” He said, his hand coming up to brush some of your hair behind your ear, “Keep going,”

“What was next?”

“What did I do everyday?” “What did you do everyday?” You asked in unison, making you giggle,

“Mm lets see, riding, archery, and sword trainings. But I grew tired of that quickly, and turned my attention to healing.”

“You’re quite good at it.” 

“Thank you,” You smiled, and he nodded at you wanting you to continue with his questions, “Right… Foods were less decadent as the foods here. Hardly ever any fruits. Kidney or liver pie, soup, really anything hot. And as for people, I knew everyone on that Island.” 

“Any men?”

“Yes, many men.” You smiled holding back a giggle

“Did you love any of them?” He held you slightly tighter,

“No.” You shook your head, “I had been with men, not many. However none of them I loved, much less did they perform well enough to inspire any interest.”

“Do I do well enough?” He leaned in closer and spoke softly, just in case anyone was around to hear it.

“Very well,” You smiled, “but you already know that.” You said leaning your forehead against his, rubbing your nose against his. When you pulled away you asked softly, “Have you ever loved a woman?”

“No.” He responded quickly

“You’ve been with a woman before though,” You asked with a raised eyebrow

“Yes. But, it was… only.. Physical.” He seemed flustered by the question.

“Other handmaidens?” You teased

It only flustered him more, “No- no, no, they were…”

“Whores?”

“How did you-”

“Rumors spread quickly, though I suppose worse rumors have been told.” 

“You do not judge me for it?”

“Every man has done it. Very little of them admit it. Even fewer of them would admit it to a woman, I’d not judge your honesty.” You smiled softly

“I won’t be doing it again.” 

“You’d not enjoyed it?”

He shook his head “I wouldn’t anymore.” His eyes became desperate, and filled with longing “I’ve missed being near you.” His voice was lower, and his grip on you tighter. It didn’t feel like lust. It felt like something that scared you terribly. 

“Stop that.” You said, almost a plea.

“I don’t believe you see how wonderful you are. I don’t know how you don’t, but you don’t.” His hands went from your waist to your face, cupping your jaw. “When you asked me if I had ever loved a woman. I said no, but that was a lie because the answer was yes and it was now. I love you.” His voice was desperate.

“Stop that I said-“ You said pulling his hands away from your face, 

“I can’t, I can’t hold it inside any longer, I love you.” He said as you passed him, almost running away. 

Spending so long being used for one thing, it didn’t make sense for someone to love you. And for you to love someone else. 

How could you love someone when you were so close to leaving this place. As you walked down the halls, tears in your eyes. You realized you weren’t walking back to your own room but his. You realized that you did love him. And you realized that he loved you. If you were going home once Margery was queen and you’d never see him again. You wanted, no you needed to tell him at least. 

꒰ ୨୧ ─ ・┈ ꒱꒱

When you walked into his chamber you waited for him. It wasn’t long till he arrived. 

Podrick walked into his chamber. He looked like he had cried. A he noticed you and you could see the relief wash over him.

“I thought I scared you off.” You said, breathing a sigh of relief as he approached you.

“It wasn’t you that scared me. But you were right, I am frightened.” You said as you wrapped your arms around him

“Tell me why?” He pleaded as you petted your hair.

“Once Margery is queen, she had promised me that she’d send me home. I was frightened of how much pain I’m going to be in when that happens.” You held his face in your hands, “But I could be content here. If you were with me.” You smiled softly, eyes still glassy from the tears.

“I can’t make you stay somewhere like this if you’ve a chance to leave it. A chance to be somewhere where you’d be treated as you deserve. Where your name has weight. Where you’d have power.” He said softly his eyes filled with a heavy sorrow

“You wouldn’t be making me.” You shook your head.

“(Y/N),” He began

“Stop,.. I admit I find it hard to find the language to describe this. Where I come from we don’t speak of such things. It’s silly and pathetic to us. But I find the urge to tell you this now.” You pleaded, “I’ve not felt this emotion toward another. Ever. It is greater than any ambition or desire I have. It makes me forget the things I miss because I know if I’m without you, I’ll miss you far greater than all that. I believe this to be what they say love is. Tell me, have you felt what you feel for me for anyone other than myself? If you have, say it now, plainly. And I will not burden you-“ 

Podrick took you by your face and kissed you deeply. Desperately. 

He broke your kiss, he held his grasp on your cheeks. 

“It’s a feeling that consumes me and my thoughts. I feel it surrounds me whenever I am near you, and I feel it’s absence when I am without you. Like a cold emptiness in my chest. Each night, when I lay alone I think of your face. No, no I have never felt this for another.” He brushed your cheek with his thumb, he looked into your eyes in awe. “This must be that companionship they talk about in songs and books, but it feels like we’re inventing something.” He said, a small smile pulling slightly at the corners of his mouth.

“Do all lovers feel that way?” You asked, breathlessly as you held him close.

“I only care for us, how we feel, how you feel.”

“I miss your lips on mine, kiss me again.” You said into his lips as he kissed you again. 

This kiss was desperate, passionate, and loving. His lips were gentle but firm. Your lips left his as they kissed his jaw and his neck. Your hand roamed from his back to shoulder down to his stomach and then to his cock.

Breathlessly Podrick spoke again, “I watched you all night,” He said stifling a moan as you palmed his hardening cock through his breeches.

“Did you?” You whispered into his neck,

“I did,” He moaned softly, “I envied every man who danced with you-”

“Envied?” You whispered into his ear as you kissed and licked at his ear. 

“Hated.” He corrected, his voice deeper than it was before.

“You’re the only man I want.” You said, breathlessly as you pulled the ties of his breeches loose

He shook his head, “You’re the only woman I have ever wanted.” He brushed his thumb over your bottom lip, you kissed his thumb.

“I want you to feel good.” You said, almost in a moan.

“I feel very good-” He said but was catch off guard by you getting on your knees, he stammered slightly “You don’t have to”

“You don’t want me to?” You asked as you slowly released him from his breeches. You took him in your hand. Admiring just how pretty his cock was. It was girthy enough that you just about couldn’t close your fist around it. 

“I- I do but I don’t want you to feel as if you need to.” 

“Sweet boy, “ You kissed the head of it making him swallow hard as his cock twitched, “would it change how you think of me if I told you I want to do this.” You asked, looking up at him with doe like eyes.

He shook his head no, and was about to tell you how he would never think of you differently when he let out a moan as you licked up and down his shaft. 

He grasped at your hair instinctively but released his grasp almost immediately not wanting to feel like he was forcing you. But his hand stayed on top of your head. 

“Beautiful,” He cooed as he petted your hair

You pulled your tongue away from his tip,

“You like it?” you asked sweetly as you took his tip into your mouth. 

“Ve-Very m-much” He stammered trying not to moan

You took him out of your mouth once more, “You can tell me,” you said before sinking him into your mouth completely. 

“I don’t want to be vulgar to you- mmmm,” He gripped slightly harder onto the crown of your head as you sucked harder, working your tongue so skillfully up and down his shaft “but it’s so good. Gods!” He winced

“(Y/N), please, I need to- to-“ He stammered as he pulled himself out of your mouth. He dropped to his knees and kissed you deeply. “I wasn’t going to last long, I don’t want to finish yet,” He whispered into your mouth. 

His mouth moved away from yours to kiss your cheek, and your jaw, then your neck. “I’ll be careful not to bruise you this time, I promise” He said sickeningly sweet. 

“I don’t care if you do,” You said as he wrapped an arm around your lower back, he began moving closer and closer to you, slowly pushing you down onto the ground. 

You smiled up at him as you laid on the ground. You pulled your skirts up exposing your dampened small clothes. Podrick took your hand, kissed the inside of your wrist, then your palm, then each of your fingers. 

“I want you,” You said softly, 

He kissed from your hand, to your wrist, down your arm, all the way to your shoulder, til finally he kissed your neck. 

“Can I do… something.” He whispered into your neck, you nodded back in return. 

He pulled your small clothes off, and kissed your inner thighs gently. “If we were wed,” He kissed your other thighs' delicate inner skin, “I’d never let them perform the bedding ceremony.” He bit your inner thigh delicately making you whimper and squirm, “I’d never let any man handle you that way.” He said into your weeping cunt, the vibration of his voice made you mewl. He began by simply kissing your clit. One of his hands ran up and down your inner thigh, while the other he used to run his thumb up and down your aching slit. 

“More, please..” You mewled, 

“Whatever you wish,” He said before he pushed a finger into your weeping core as he began to suck on your clit. You arched your back at the sensation, your eyes went to the back of your head as you whimpered out his name. 

Then he pushed in a second finger, and curled his fingers upwards into that sweet spot in your cunt. Pulsing his two fingers against it, again and again. It made you moan out, “Podri-Mphm!” you curled your toes and gripped his hair tightly, making him moan into your cunt, the vibration against your clit only making the pleasure that more intense. “Aaawh!” You practically cried out. 

You could believe someone would refuse payment for this. 

You couldn’t help but buck and grind against his face, which he didn’t seem to mind telling by the way he moaned into your cunt. 

But you didn’t want to come undone on his fingers and tongue, you wanted more, needed more.

“Podrick,” You said softly, and he immediately halted his actions and looked up at you. 

Those big brown puppy eyes, so sweet and loving. You petted the top of his head, rubbing your thumb against his temple a few times. “I need you, all of you.” 

He arose from between your thighs. Panting, and immediately pulling you into a kiss. You could taste the sweetness, the bitterness, the saltiness, it was intoxicating, and it was you. 

“You taste so good, so good,” He whispered into your lips as he positioned his aching cock against your soaking entrance.

“I love you,” He said, and before you could say it back he was sliding inside of you, you moaned loudly and clenched around him making him bury his face into your neck and moan out your name so desperately. 

You gripped at his back. With his face in your neck, you kissed into his ear between your own desperate moans. As he pumped himself in and out of you, his hand found your face, cupping your cheeks and looking into your eyes with awe and wonder. Love. 

“Do- Mmmphm! Do I fe-feel good enough?” You asked breathlessly between moans. It made him smile and thrust even harder into you, 

“Very,” He thrusted harder, “Very,” and harder, “Very” and harder again, “Very good.” 

As his thrusts continued, faster, and harder, he trailed down your body and to your cunt again. Circling your clit, he somehow always knew just how much pressure to apply. You felt yourself tightening, and so could he. 

You thrusted against him, the lewd sounds of your bodies colliding mixed with the sounds of your shared moans filled the room. 

As you felt your peak reaching you grabbed ahold of his throat, tightening your grip only slightly. Enough for him to feel the pleasure of it. 

“I want it this time, I want it in me.” You whimpered against his lips as you held him by his throat,

He nodded frantically in return as his thrusts became more and more erratic and you clenched down on his cock more and more. The heat is tightening in your stomach more and more. 

Soon you finally felt his hot seed spill inside of you, you felt the heat spread inside of you. It was too much for you and you came alongside him. 

He stayed in you for a moment. You both held one another panting, sometimes kissing one another before he pulled out of you. 

Still panting he laid beside you, on the floor of your chamber, still in your disheveled clothing, your fingers entwined. 

You looked over at him, still trying to catch your breath, “How did you get so good at that?” you asked softly.

“I hoped for so long I would find someone I loved. I imagined it all, countless times.” He looked over to you, “Waiting for you.” 

“You dreamt of it?” You asked in a whisper,

“No, I thought of you.” 

꒰ ୨୧ ─ ・┈ ・ ─ ・┈ ─ ・┈ ─ ・┈ ꒱꒱

NOTE:

If anyone gets the Portrait of a lady on fire reference I will kiss you on the mouth. 

BELOVED TAGS: 

@ryn-away @boojaynaqueen @holierthancunt @symonedoesart

[redwolf17]

Okay, so it is Speculation Time: I think that Jaime is going to find out exactly who killed Tyrion and if Tommen goes the same way as Rosby, then that could push him over the edge... But on the other hand (har-har), he doesn't overly care about his own kids and only really cares about having Cersei to himself *shudders* And that might set her off...

(I am so glad Brienne avoided that mess. Having show!Cersei 'confront' Brienne and accuse her of being in love with Jaime was uncomfortable for everyone involved., As there was nothing really inappropriate or inherently wrong about someone like Brienne finding Jaime hot. NOW Cersei on the other hand- Big Yikes)

Not sure how Cersei is going to take Jaime's "well, we can always make another one" attitude, especially when she learns about Jaime's role in confirming the truth to Myrcella and prompting her to send that letter...

Here is my research:

JAIME POV:

"Podrick Payne. He would not leave the Imp's side, not for a moment, not even when Lord Tywin and the Queen Regent came. The poor lad finally fell asleep in the queen's arms."

Something was amiss there, but Jaime was too weary to think on it.

....

Jaime grunted as he slashed at the tree. Sweat blurred his vision, and for a moment the tree was a knight clad in pale armor. Are you the one who killed my brother? With a curse Jaime hacked and parried, then made to thrust his blade through the knight's heart- only to find himself flat on his back, his left arm throbbing in pain.

If only Jaime knew who had slain his little brother. His left hand might be pitiful, but he was still strong enough to slash a man's throat.

...

But what man? There had been hundreds on the bridge of boats, knights and men-at-arms and squires. Any one of them could have knocked Tyrion into the wildfire.

Podrick Payne might know, but Jaime doubted it. 

...

CERSEI POV:

"Cersei narrowed her eyes. The Red Viper's previous squire was Ser Daemon Sand, one of the finest knights in all of Dorne. Why tolerate a timid boy from the Westerlands? Unless... her blood ran cold. No, the boy would not have breathed a word, she had frightened him into silence, she was sure of it."

...

"The queen awoke to the sound of bells tolling the fifth hour of the morning. Her right arm still hurt; Cersei rubbed it, feeling the slick sweat upon her skin. It will snow today, that is all. Ever since the valonqar broke her arm, it pained her when the weather turned cold. Still, it would be good to see the filthy city covered in a blanket of fresh fallen snow, like the shroud they draped atop a Kingsguard when he died. No, she musn't think of that. No one knew, save a pimple faced squire who might have guessed too much. But he would never breathe a word, and if he did, who would care?"

UUUHHH JAIME MIGHT

As you can tell, I have a completely normal level of interest in your writing :P

Yeah, I’d heard the show went weird places with Cersei and Brienne and Jaime 😬 yikes.

That’s some A+ sleuthing! You caught a lot of important foreshadowing, though not all of it… 😉 🥰

[scorpion-flower]

Even now, there are people who call the finale of GOT "fan service" and I'm sitting here like "Dude, most GOT watchers wanted a certain ending, with a certain Targaryen woman on the throne and this isn't what happened, and besides s8 lacking common sense, this is why most of GOT watchers were pissed off in the end." How can you call it fan service if most of the audience was disappointed?

[castieltrash1]

who i write for ↴

italicized are faves + *request by request basis due to age

supernatural: sam, dean, castiel, crowley, lucifer, jack*, meg, rowena, gabriel, gadreel

tolkien: kili, fili, thorin, legolas, aragorn, boromir, faramir, haldir, lindir, bard, eomer, thranduil

marvel: steve, bucky, tony, clint, natasha, bruce, stephen, peter p.*, peter q., thor, loki, scott, sam, killmonger, pietro, wanda, gamora, carol, yelena, the eternals, vision, pepper, hope

criminal minds: aaron, spencer, derek, penelope, emily, jj, matt, elle, luke

peaky blinders: thomas, arthur, john, alfie, lizzie, michael, ada, esme, aberama

game of thrones: petyr, tyrion, jaime, daenerys, jon, robb, sansa*, arya*, jorah, theon, sam, gendry, bronn, brienne, margaery, yara, podrick, jaqen, melisandre, grey worm, missandei, tormund, daario, oberyn, edd, edmure

law and order svu: liv, elliot, munch, fin, cassidy, monique, melinda, nick, mike, alex, casey, rafael, peter, sonny

misc: the batman, divergent, house of wax, connor dbh, jackson rippner, brahms heelshire, scream, jd (heathers), ian mckinley, the lost boys, ray merrimen

retired fandoms (may return): harry potter, the vampire diaries/the originals, borhap/queen, twilight

basic rules ↴

“imagine” requests: any character(s), relationship types, aus, etc. ALL imagine requests will always be written as they’re shorter and easier to complete for me!!

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nsfw is allowed (and encouraged tbh im a hoe), requests are gender-neutral unless stated/requested otherwise, and poly relationships or love triangle centered requested are allowed!!

extra reminders ↴

my blog is lgbtq+ inclusive, so please feel free to request things specific to a certain gender/sexuality ♡

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[brrahbrrahcharacterimagines]

Before (Podrick Payne x Reader) *SMUT*

MASTERLIST

Part 2 - After

Pairing: Podrick Payne x Reader

Word Count: 2112

Warnings: Swearing, SEX, unprotected sex (please be safe!), fingering, cum

A/N: This can maybe be read as a sequel to My Hero, but can also just be read on its own. Also, yay! I’m back from vacation, so here you go guys!

You had been travelling with Brienne of Tarth and Podrick for months, joining them as they made their way back to Winterfell. You had been born in the Westerlands, and admittedly weren’t fond of the cold. You shivered, trying to keep your teeth from chattering. You wrapped your arms around Pod even tighter, pressing yourself closer to him on the back of the horse you currently shared. 

“Y/N,” said Pod, “are you alright?”

“Y-yea,” you said, stuttering as you shivered. “I’m just cold. The North has always been cold, but with Winter here I’m going insane.”

“My Lady,” called Pod to Brienne, “could we rest for a moment? I have an idea.”

“I’m not a lady,” replied Brienne grudgingly. “But yes, Pod. We need to make it quick though, we need to return to Lady Sansa in Winterfell.”

The three of you stopped and Pod got off his horse. As you moved to slide off as well, he stopped you.

“Scoot forward,” he said. You cocked your head in confusion but did as he asked. As you did so he remounted the horse, only this time he was behind you. He retook the reigns in his hands, surprising you as he wrapped his arms around you to do so. “Thank you My Lady, we may continue.”

“Pod, how many times do I have to tell you that I am not a lady?” Questioned Brienne, her tone tense. Nonetheless, you rode on back to Winterfell. 

Podrick had been right. As you rode back you were significantly warmer. His arms around you made you feel much better, and his hot breath fanning on your neck made you heat up even more. You had had a crush on Podrick for a long time, but you never would have told him that. In your eyes, you were just some lowly girl from the Westerlands. You were sure that is how you were seen in his eye too.

You knew that Pod could get any girl he wanted. You’d heard stories, rumors, whispers about his bedroom prowess. Everybody knew that he had returned Lord Tyrion’s money from the brothel after the ladies there refused it. He had done something so amazing to them that he enjoyed their time for free. You had to admit that this intrigued you. Despite your best efforts there were many nights that you would lie awake, imagining what he might have done. These thoughts did nothing to cure your childlike crush on the boy, in fact they made it worse. You loved that he was sweet and shy on the outside, but knowing that he had a darker side in the bedroom turned you on.

When you finally returned to Winterfell, everybody was rushing around like mad. The Night King and his army were almost here. Overhearing yelling and commotion in the crowd you concluded that you likely only had 24 hours as a maximum before the Night King was at your doorstep. You bid Podrick and Brienne a goodbye before quickly making your way back to your room to change. Your dress had gotten dirty on the journey, and you’d be damned if you didn’t spend what may be your last hours looking good.

You changed hurriedly into a deep purple dress that Sansa had made. The neckline was lower than that of dresses that you usually wore, but you decided that now was a good a time as any to wear it.

Your braids had become messy during your ride, so you took them out. You had beautiful hair, opting to leave it down instead of taking the time to re-braid it.

Making your way through the castle you heard a loud voice echoing down one of the hallways. You recognized it instantly, only one man would be talking as loud as this when he wasn’t angry. Tormund.

You made your way towards his voice. You had never had any issues with Tormund despite him being a wildling and you wouldn’t mind seeing him before the battle began.

You rounded the corner, finding Tormund and a group of others listening to his story. You only caught the tail end, but you heard something about giants and breast milk. You figured you didn’t want to ask him to repeat it. The expressions on the faces of everybody else in the room alerted you that the story was a rather uncomfortable one for everybody other than Tormund. Among the group was Podrick, and you made your way to sit next to him. You thought you had seen him glance down at your more exposed cleavage, but surely you were mistaken. Right?

“Good evening, Pod.” You said with a smile. He returned your smile with one of his own that made your heart melt. You did your best to conceal your blush, turning towards the fire.

“Good evening Y/N.”

The group made mindless small talk for some time before Tormund asked Brienne if she was a knight. You were angry as she told him why she wasn’t; she was a woman. You couldn’t help but beam as she was knighted by Ser Jaime Lannister, becoming Ser Brienne of Tarth. Brienne herself even smiled, warming your heart. She rarely smiled, so seeing her beam so brightly was a treat. You returned to small talk for a while after the makeshift ceremony until Tyrion proposed a song.

At first, everybody was quiet. But then you heard his voice; the voice coming from the man beside you. The man that you had an undeniable crush on.

He had the voice of an angel, and you couldn’t help but stare in awe as Podrick sang one of your favorite songs, “Jenny of Oldstones.” He glanced at you as the song finished, making you blush. Surely he had noticed your eyes on him the entire time. 

Everybody began retiring to their rooms or other places in the castle, with you deciding to try and get what little rest you could. Podrick offered to walk you to your room and you accepted. You wanted to spend all the time with him that you could.

As you reached your door you let out a sigh. As time kept ticking away you grew more scared, more afraid of the battle to come. Even if you survived in the crypts, Podrick would be out on the battlefield. You knew that you would be worrying about him the entire time.

You glanced up into Podrick’s dark eyes, thinking of an idea. 

“Pod,” you asked hesitantly. “Would you like to stay?”

His eyes grew wide and a blush spread across his cheeks. He didn’t say a word, but he did enter the room behind you. He closed the door behind him.

You began to undress, feeling Pod’s eyes on your body. You flushed a bright red. Perhaps he had gotten the wrong idea...

“Could you turn around,” you mumbled. He blushed and did as you asked as you stripped down to your undergarments.

You slid into bed, covering yourself in the furs lying there. 

“You don’t have to sleep in your armor Pod,” you said softly. “I’ll close my eyes if you want.”

Podrick paused for a moment.

“You don’t have to.”

You flushed a bright red as Podrick began to undress. Now that he was, you weren’t sure you could look away if you tried. His body was absolutely stunning. He had toned muscle in all the right places and it was making you wild. He smirked at you, only deepening your blush. Soon after, he slid into bed next to you.

You shifted closer to him. As you did so, he reached out to wrap an arm around you and pull your head closer to his chest until you were laying against him.

“Pod?” You whispered.

“Yes, Y/N?”

“Thank you for staying with me tonight. I just didn’t want to be alone with everything going on.”

Podrick chuckled, sending vibrations through his chest. You could feel them well thanks to your closeness. 

“Of course I would keep you company. I would do anything for you.”

His words sent a wave of comfort, and yet arousal, through your entire being. Maybe that wrong idea he had gotten was right after all.

“Anything?” You asked, pulling away to look him in the eyes. His eyes were dark, and they were wide. His eyes were full of lust.

“Anything.”

And with that word, your lips crashed to his as he moved to meet you in the middle. He moved so that he was propped up on his arms over top of you, bending down to press his lips to yours. Your lips moved fervently and feverishly, as if this was the only chance you had. With everything going on in Winterfell, it very well might have been.

You snaked around Podrick, trailing your nails up his back. He let out a groan, making you gasp in response. You tangled your fingers in his hair. You let out a moan as you felt Pod’s hard member brush against your core. Through your undergarments you could feel him grind into you, slowly picking up in speed and pressure.You let out a soft moan, only encouraging the man.

He pulled his hips away, ghosting his fingers down your body until they reached where you needed him most. He ran his fingers softly over your core, feeling you through the only layer you had left on.

“Gods you’re so fucking wet for me.”

You couldn’t help but let out a moan at his words, bucking your hips towards his hand. Hearing the normally innocent and shy Podrick curse as he touched your body put you right up on cloud nine.

Before you knew it, Podrick had pulled your remaining undergarments off as well as his own. He brushed the head of his cock against your now exposed cunt, teasing you. You grabbed his shoulders tightly, digging in your nails in anticipation.

“Please Pod,” you whimpered. His eyes filled with even more of that lustful fire that you loved. 

“Are you sure about this?” He asked.

“Yes Podrick, please just go inside me,” you moaned. He did quickly, although he gave you time to adjust to the feeling of his dick inside your pussy.

It hurt at first, and you buried your face into Podrick’s neck. He was panting heavily, and you could tell how much willpower it was taking him to not fuck you already.

He started to move slowly, rocking his hips back and forth just a little bit. Quickly the movement became pleasurable, eliciting moans and gasps from that pretty mouth of yours that Podrick couldn’t help but bring his lips back to again. One of his hands reached up towards your breasts, kneading gently for a while before he began to run his fingers over your sensitive nipples. He would flick a finger over quickly a few times, then slowly graze your nipple as he circled the areola. He fell into a pattern with his fingers and his cock that was driving you crazy, feeling heat rush through your whole body. 

He moved his fingers from your breasts, making you whimper as he slowly caressed down your stomach to your hips, eventually settling on your clit. He rubbed his thumb over the sensitive bud in time with his thrusts, making you moan loudly. 

“Podrick!” You cried, making him falter and let out a load moan himself.

You felt his thrusts getting faster as he pounded into you harder and harder. You only got louder as the pressure on your clit increased and he began attacking your neck. Surely he would be leaving marks that would be there in the morning, but in the moment it felt so good that you didn’t care. He began to groan more, panting even louder as he reached his climax.

“Pod,” you cried again, sending him over the edge. You felt him spill his seed into you, pushing you over your own edge quickly as he continued to thrust sloppily and rub your swollen clitoris.

He pulled out after you had both finished, rolling over onto his back. He reached over to you, pulling you onto his chest. You felt him bend down, giving you a kiss on the top of your head.

“Pod?” You whispered.

“Yes Y/N?”

“You better keep yourself alive for me. I don’t know what I’d do if I didn’t get to do that again.” You flashed a dorky smile up at Pod, earning a dopey smile in return.

“Don’t worry Y/N, we’re going to be doing this a lot more from now on.”

You weren’t going to argue with that.

Part 2 - After

[megsironthrone]

Heir

Based on this request:  Real life AU w/ Pod where he’s the assistant to Tyrion who’s a billionaire. Tyrion says that he’s choosing an heir to his business and fortune & ends up choosing Pod. Pod and reader have been friends for a long time and she has feelings for him. She’s kinda chubby and thinks she’s average so when these rich hot models start flirting with him she knows she needs to step up her game and decides to go do it at the party that Tyrion is throwing in Pod’s honor. Kinda based off Dan P’s instagram from @smalltownbigheart

Here you are, lovely! Now, I do not have an Instagram, so I had no idea what you were talking about. I just went with the rest of the request. I do not own Podrick. He belongs to George R.R.Martin. 

Warnings: Modern AU. a little angst, a little weight-shaming, fluff, a bit of steam, and some allusions to sexy times at the beginning, Tyrion acting as a fairy godfather of sorts

Pairings/Characters: Podrick Payne x fem!reader, Tyrion Lannister.

Podrick glanced over at the person next to him. He smiled as his gaze traveled over your curves. Curves his hands were all over only hours before. A few months ago, he never would have believed he’d be here. And now? Now he never wanted to leave. He pushed a strand of hair out of your face as he thought about how he ended up with you.

         You were sitting next to Podrick when Tyrion announced that he was naming Podrick as the heir to his company and fortune. You weren’t surprised. Podrick had been Tyrion’s assistant for years and Tyrion had no children. Maybe you were biased since he was your best friend, but you believed Podrick deserved it. He worked harder than anyone.

         Unfortunately for you, Podrick’s new title brought out the ladies. It seemed everywhere you went after that, Podrick was surrounded by beautiful, rich women. And Podrick basked in the attention. Not that you blamed him. Everyone wants to be loved. You did. Sadly, you only loved one person and that was Podrick.

         You hadn’t told him how you felt. You didn’t want to ruin your friendship. And now, seeing him with all those beautiful women, you were beginning to feel insecure. You weren’t super thin like some of them were. You were a little chubby. You typically loved your curves, but now you wished you were a little more fit. Or had more confidence. Confidence enough to tell your best friend that you were hopelessly in love with him. But you didn’t. Until the one day you decided you’d had enough.

         Tyrion made another announcement a couple of weeks after naming Pod his successor. He was going to through the biggest party the city had ever seen in honor of Pod. That was your chance. You were going to buck up and tell Podrick Payne how you felt, even if it killed you. Now, you just needed the confidence to work it out. You knew you had to step up you game in order to have a chance with Podrick.

         "Y/N, I’d like to see you in my office for a moment.“ You looked at Tyrion with wide eyes. It wasn’t often people were called into his office. “O-Of course.” You got up and followed him into his office. You could feel Pod’s gaze on you the whole time. “Close the door please.” You did. Tyrion sat down at his desk and gestured to the seat opposite him.

         "So, how long have you been in love with our dear Podrick?“ You felt the heat creeping into your cheeks. How had he known? As if reading your mind, Tyrion said, "The entire office sees the way you look at him, Y/N. You have obviously loved him a long time. Why haven’t you said anything?” You gestured to yourself. “Look at me. I’m not like those women that are all over him now. I want to prove to him that I am the one for him, but I don’t know how.”

         "You just need a little confidence. And, if my sister was right about one thing, confidence often starts with what one is wearing. Which is why I took the liberty of getting this for you.“ He walked over to the  door. It was then that you noticed the garment bag hanging there. You followed him over and unzipped the bag. Inside was a gorgeous dress that would do wonders for your figure.

         "I’ve also booked you an appointment at the salon to do whatever you think you need to be ready for tonight. Think of me as your fairy godfather. I don’t want to see Pod with any of those women. They have only just showed interest in him because of what he has now. Sure, they’d be great to take to the bedroom once or twice…” he trailed off when he saw your hurt expression. You didn’t even want to think about Pod sleeping with anyone else.

         "But they aren’t good for long term. You are. And I think Pod loves you too.“ You shook your head. "He doesn’t. But thanks for this. Maybe this will help me have some confidence.” You bent down and hugged the smaller man. Grabbing the dress, you practically ran from the office, ignoring Podrick’s calls of your name.

         You spent the entire afternoon prepping yourself. You were going to give yourself the confidence to tell Podrick how you felt. You needed him to know that you loved him. You got yourself all dolled up and looked the mirror. You looked hot, if you did say so yourself. Those other women didn’t stand a chance. Podrick wouldn’t know what hit him.

         The party was already in full swing when you arrived. “You look lovely, Y/N,” Tyrion commented before turning your attention to Podrick. There were people around him, but you didn’t care. You sauntered over with a smile on your face. “Hey, Pod.” Podrick’s eyes went wide when he saw you. “Y-Y/N. Whoa. You look g-great!.” You beamed. “Thanks, Pod. Having fun?”

         "Yeah,“ he said with a nod, "Even more now that my best friend is here.” You told him that you were glad. “Did I mention that you look great?” You giggled. “You did.” Podrick had a nice pink tint on his face all the way to his ears. “Well you do. I mean…you always look great, but-” You laughed again as another woman came sauntering over.

         "Congratulations, Podrick. You deserve it,“ she with a sweet smile, ignoring you completely. Podrick looked slightly pleased and slightly uncomfortable. "Thanks. I’m gonna go get a drink. You want anything, Y/N?” You smiled again and shook your head. “No thanks.” Podrick nodded and walked away to the bar, leaving you alone with Miss Model.

         "You’re trying way too hard.“ Your brows furrowed as you looked at her. "I mean, Podrick’s a sweet guy and all, but now he’s the heir to a major corporation and fortune. He needs someone a little more in his league. Don’t you agree? I know she does.” You followed her finger to the bar where yet another beautiful woman was talking to Podrick. By her body language, it was easy to tell she was flirting. What was also obvious was that Podrick was loving every minute of it. Without saying a word, you scurried off to the ladies room.

         You stood in front of the mirror, willing yourself not to cry. You had a mission and you couldn’t do it with running mascara. Your reflection staring back at you was a woman of confidence yet you felt it all leave your body. How were supposed to compete with them? Simple answer was that you couldn’t.

         A knock on the door pulled you  from your thoughts. “Y/N?” The door opened slightly to reveal Podrick. “Go away, Pod.” Instead of listening, he came all the way in and locked the door. “Are you okay?” Your self-pity turned to anger in an instant. “No, Podrick, I’m not! I came here tonight to tell you that I am hopelessly in love with you! But you obviously prefer the attention of all those beautiful women out there! God, I was so stupid to think you would ever see me as more than your best friend.”  

         Podrick stepped closer to you. He kept getting closer until you were pressed up against the sink. “You are my best friend, Y/N. But those women out there…” he trailed off as you turned your head away from him. You couldn’t look at his face when he confessed he’d rather be with one of them. Podrick wasn’t having it. He gently grabbed your chin and made you look at him before he spoke again.

         "They have nothing on you. You are gorgeous, Y/N. I’ve always thought so. Gods, everything about you makes me want to take you to bed. Even your laugh. Do you know how hard it is not to grab you and kiss you when you come into work in those skirts? Do you know how much I want to go home with you at night and hold you while we watch TV? The only reason I never said anything is because I didn’t think you’d want someone like me. I’m not stupid. Those women out there only want me because of what I have now. You have always been there.“

         Throughout his entire speech, you felt your face heat up and your eyes well with tears. Although this time, they were tears of happiness. "Do you mean that, Pod?” He smiled at you before bringing his lips to meet you. Your entire body felt like it was on fire as he kissed you. After a moment, his hands went into your hair, tangling themselves in the (h/c) locks. You couldn’t get enough. You could have kissed him for eternity. If his kiss was any indication, the rumors about his bedroom prowess must have been true.

         Someone pounding on the bathroom door forced Podrick to detach his lips from yours. “Be mine, Y/N. Please.” You grinned and ran your hands through his hair, messing it up a bit. “I always was. But we really should get out of here. I’m sure there are ladies that need to use the restroom.”

         Podrick laughed and pulled you toward the door. He lead you back into the party where tongues began wagging. You didn’t blame them. Your hair was a mess and you lips were significantly swollen. There was no denying what had happened, but you were okay with that. At least now all those women knew exactly who it was Podrick wanted. Podrick didn’t leave your side for the rest of the night.

         Podrick couldn’t help but smile at the memory. He had been stupid not to see how you’d felt about him, but it was better now. You’d been together for months and things were great. Not perfect, but then, no relationship was. Podrick didn’t care. He was deliriously happy with you.

         "What are you thinking about?“ Your sleepy voice broke the silence in the room. He kissed your forehead. "Us. How we ended up here.” You laughed softly. “It was definitely an interesting start to our relationship.” Podrick nodded. “It was.” He fell silent, prompting you to cuddle closer. “There’s something else. I can tell.” Podrick laughed again. He reached over to his nightstand pulled out the box he’d been keeping in there for weeks.

         "I was thinking that I want you to marry me.“ You sat up, the sheet falling from you as you did. Podrick kept his gaze on your face. "What?” He rose with you and opened the ring box. “Will you marry me, Y/N?” You beamed and nodded. You couldn’t seem to get any words out. Podrick slipped the ring on your finger and pulled you close as he kissed you deeply.

(a/n: I hope you like it!)

@brewsthespirit-blog @ghostie-writes @littlemisscaptainfandom @etherealpotter @line-viper @frozenhuntress67 @cd1242 @gruffle1

[-catelynstark]

No Lies

Pairing: Podrick Payne x gender neutral reader   I   Word Count: 2,117   I   Warnings: None  I  Summary: The reader has feelings for Podrick which hasn’t gone unnoticed by Tyrion. He talks them into confessing all to Podrick when they can no longer take the long nights and the jealousy that comes with them.

There were few who you found you could be confident around, Podrick was one of them. He was always kind, he never judged and like you he could be a little clumsy. 

But there was something else in him, something that was starting to make you feel a little nervous. You’d heard the stories about him and the whores back in King’s Landing and heard so many jokes about how good he was in bed. It got you to wondering and then that’s when you noticed it, just how hard you’d fallen for Podrick Payne. 

When he disappeared with two giggling girls from the hall, you couldn’t help the stab of jealously you felt.

“You know,” Tyrion said as he sat beside you and started to fill your cup, “If your feelings are that strong, you really should just tell him.”

You felt your cheeks turn crimson and quickly downed some wine in an attempt to cover up your shame.

“It isn’t like that,” you muttered.

“Oh isn’t it? I could have sworn I saw your hand rest upon your thigh and teeth bite your lower lip as he disappeared with those girls, but what do I know,” Tyrion teased.

You felt tears well up in your eyes, Tyrion was observant but he was also wise and a good friend.

Your fist landed on the table, “Fine. Okay I admit it, I have feelings for him okay?” You cringed at your own use of the word feelings.

Tyrion smirked, “Well you know, there’s no time like the present.”

You felt yourself shrink into your chair, “A little late for that now don’t you think?” 

You closed your eyes as you tried to fight back the tears, your feelings for Podrick had grown rapidly since you first met him like wildflowers after a dry period in hot summer sun. Every time you thought of broaching the subject with him you changed your mind, it was as if you were about to stand up and ask to speak to him alone and then something would happen. Brienne would want to train with him, he would be approached by girls and disappear to bed etc.

Only this was a lie you told yourself, the truth was that this made you feel better. The fact that you told yourself you were going to do something about it and it wasn’t that you were a coward or backed out of it. No, something always got in the way. These were the lies you almost convinced yourself of. Truth was that every time you thought of approaching him, you would wait until it was too late, then curse under your breath and tell yourself next time. 

“You know,” Tyrion continued as he swirled his wine, “Time waits for no one.”

You nodded, “I know…well nothing I can do about it tonight, but tomorrow, tomorrow I will tell him.”

Tyrion placed a hand on yours and squeezed, “Y/N Make sure that you do.”

His voice was full of regret then, Tyrion you knew spoke from experience. His eyes were kind yet full of warning so you nodded and thanked him, this time would be the last time you debated saying something and then didn’t. 

The following morning you woke slowly as sunlight creeped across your blankets and finally casting it’s warmth on your face. It was then that you realised your mistake, too often you would wait until you saw Podrick and then make your excuses for not telling him the truth. So that morning you decided to change that and seek him out in the early hours of the day. 

At breakfast time you saw him, there was an overwhelming urge to rush over to him but you didn’t wish to seem over enthusiastic. Besides, Podrick looked tired…oh of course he looked tired… You remembered the night before, the woman, no women, who dragged him so eagerly off to bed. 

You pushed your food around your plate, yet your gaze barely left his direction. Tyrion’s hand on your shoulder was what brought you back to the present.

“Morning,” you offered a sad smile to him. 

“I meant what I said last night, there’s no use you putting yourself through this day after day you know.”

You gulped and bit your lower lip, “I know,” but your answer was barely audible, it didn’t have to be for Tyrion to know what you were thinking. 

When breakfast was finished you saw Podrick get up to leave, likely to find Brienne, this was it you had to say something now before it was too late. You ran after him, perhaps a little too keenly, nearly knocking several people out of the way as you went. 

“Podrick!” You called after him.

He stopped and turned round to face you, you’d been running so fast that you practically skidded to a halt and nearly crashed into him. 

“Morning,” Podrick smiled, no beamed at you, his smile was always so welcoming, genuine and yet that shy boy was still a part of him. 

“Podrick,” you repeated. You wanted to reach out and touch his shoulder but thought better of it, “I was wondering, could we take a walk…I need to talk to you about something.”

Podrick seemed concerned then, his expression froze but only for a moment before he nodded, “Of…of course,” he went to take your arm in his and the two of you walked out into the fresh morning air. 

For a moment you walked in silence, enjoying the sound of birdsong which you could make out just over the sound of men preparing for battle. 

Impossible, that was the best word to describe your situation. For Tyrion it seemed anything was easy, was simple, girls for one reason or another loved him. Though you guessed for him to admit feelings to another might be a slightly different situation.

In the end it was Podrick who prompted you to speak, his expression as always was so warm, even if he didn’t feel the same way as you, you were sure he would put your mind at ease.

Looking up at the branches of the trees you sighed, there had been so many times when you’d wished for a simpler life. The birds that nested there had no such worries. Podrick’s arm was on your shoulder now, making you look at him, in his eyes there was no escape from the truth.

“Pod….I,” it was rare you called him Pod, only in moments of rare tenderness did you allow that name to slip between your lips.

He smiled, his thumb rubbing small circles on your shoulder, “I have to tell you something,” you straightened up your back, felt your feet firmed on the ground.

Podrick didn’t say anything, he waited patiently for you to continue, “I’ve been meaning to tell you this for some time. Part of me hoped it would be obvious so I wouldn’t have to say anything but that hasn’t happened and I can’t go on like this, lying to myself…lying to you.”

“L-lying? What, what about?” Podrick didn’t sound angry, more confused, clearly he had no idea what you were talking about.

“You…I, I see you every day, I watch you and see you laugh and smile and it makes me smile. When I’m around you I feel complete, my heart is lighter for you.”

You gulped and took a step closer to Podrick, your right hand reaching up to his face slowly, weary in case he pulled away. But when he remained still you cupped his cheek and looked into his eyes, now you had started to tell him how you really felt, it was difficult to stop.

“I…sometimes it’s difficult to be round you, it’s difficult when you’re slightly drunk and women…they flock to you.” You found yourself stroking his cheek now, “I’ve heard the stories…all the women want to sleep with you because of them.”

You could feel Podrick’s cheek flush under the heat of your palm, your own skin burning as bright as you cast your eyes to the ground for a moment.

“It’s really n-not like…” he stuttered.

You fell silent for a moment, his reaction so far was better than you had hoped for, he hadn’t tried to change the subject or back away from you, that was enough for you to keep trying.

“Podrick, when I see you disappear with them, I’m jealous okay?” You looked back up at him, “And I know that’s a terrible thing to be, that jealousy is ugly… but I can’t help it, the way that I feel about you it clouds all judgement and I cannot deny the fact that I….love you.”

Love. That perhaps was too strong a word in hindsight, only it was the truth and you’d promised him that much, so it had to be the whole truth.

“I love you,” you repeated, tears blurring your vision a little as they clouded your eyes. Your other hand clasped on his shoulder for support, “I love you and I had to tell you,” you looked at the ground still holding onto him tightly. Afraid to search his face for an answer.

Podrick didn’t respond for a moment, his eyes just staring into yours, face still kind despite the lack of words. And then he stepped back and laughed.

Laughter? That was not what you had been expecting and the shame that now burnt on your cheeks showed this.

Although he was laughing, his hands hadn’t left you, though now they had travelled from your shoulder and were lightly gripping your lower arms. His cheeks too were burning and the laughter that omitted from him didn’t sound like cruelness, rather embarrassment and confusion.

“You’re….” that was all he managed to get out before looking at the floor, his feet shuffling as he did so.

“I’m in love with you Podrick” you took a deep breath, “But it’s okay if you don’t feel the same, you don’t have to say it back…it’s okay. I just, I just couldn’t watch you any longer and not say anything it was killing me,” you confessed as you started to cry, unable to hold the tears back any longer.

“Hey, hey,” Podrick said as he stepped forward again and wrapped his arms around you pulling you into a tight embrace, “P-p-please don’t cry, not on account, on account of…on account,” he was struggling to get his words out you could tell. “N-not on account of of me.” He finally finished. 

You looked back up at him, the warmth on his face made you feel so safe, though his cheeks were still burning he was smiling, “I’m not so g-g-good with words so…” he didn’t say anymore instead he placed his hands on either side of your face. His palms were trembling but warm, slightly sweaty and as he touched your skin you felt a shiver run down your spine due to the contact. 

Podrick didn’t answer with words, instead as he took hold of you, he leaned in and pressed the softest kiss against your lips. You barely felt it as it was so gentle but that moment of intimacy meant everything to you, it was something you hoped to be true. When Podrick pulled back to gauge your reaction and you stood frozen, mouth slightly open in anticipation, awaiting another kiss, he pulled you close and placed his lips on yours again. This time the kiss was deeper, though it started slow he soon kissed with passion, his hands now reached up into your hair. That was when you knew it was the truth, in that kiss there was no room for lies. 

Your arms reached round his back and hugged him tightly, never wanting to break the kiss. There would be time to talk about this later, to discuss how long he had felt like that and to find out what exactly he did to those women for yourself. 

When the two of you finally broke the kiss for longer than a beat, you stood so that your foreheads were pressed together. Podrick’s hands now slid down from your hair and onto your cheeks once again, his thumb gently stroking you in small reassuring circles. 

“Y-y-your words…there’s no lies?” he asked trembling. 

“No lies,” you confirmed, finding it difficult now to contain your elation. 

Podrick let out a relieved sigh and chuckled lowly. You could feel his breath on your face as he did so, warm and inviting so much so that you found yourself kissing him once again.

[youknownnothingjonsnow0303]

Can you imagine if Arya and comes back and she and gendry start to have a relationship like Elizabeth Bennett and Mr. Darcy?

I do like to think that the first thing she does when se comes back is go to storm ends... but something happens (maybe Gendry is really mad at her for leaving or she sees one of his sisters with him and get jealous, because she dosent know is his sister).

She travels to kings Landing and start to do clases for little girls.

They meet again and is like the dance part in P&P.

Is raining, she runs away after the dance and he runs after her. They have a conversation about being a lady and the angst... they almost kiss (this is like the conversation that Elizabeth and Darcy have when is raining but we already had the proposal part, so lest not do that in this post)

Onde day she is invited to Storm Ends and she sees everything that she missed. She meet Gendry sisters and have a great conection with them.

Something happens to Jon, she has to run to the noth again. Gendry comes with her.

In winterfell they have to separate again because Gendry is going behind the wall to find Jon and Arya is staying with Sansa.

In that time everyone in storm ends, KL and winterfell are talking about Arya and Gendry. Some soldiers swear they saw them kissing while they were traveling to winterfell. Some other people say they sleep in the same room while they were in storm ends.

But some lords and ladys wanted Gendry to get married to their daughters. So we have this woman, a old lady of the south very respected that travels to Winterfell to see Arya.

Arya is confused because Gendry never told her he was looking for a wife or any of that. She gets mad when the lady says to her that she is not enough to be storm ends lady, so Arya makes a speech about how she is the princess of the fucking 7 kingdoms, the heir of the north, the princess that was promised bla bla bla and no one cant tell her that she is not worthy of the men she loves, and the lady leaves angry as hell. (Sansa, tyrion, brianne, podrick and davos where hearing behind the door)

When gendry comes back to Winterfell he hears people talking about what happened. Davos talks with him and says exactly what Arya told the old lady.

Arya is practicing archery with some little girls when she sees him. She send the girls home and the “i love you, i love you, i love you” scene happens.

Anyway they married in Winterfell (gendry sisters are there) and they live to storm ends after the wedding ❤️

[shipping-receiving]

Hey! I've failed to find a fic, I can picture it perfectly: modern B and J are childhood friends, but loose contact. J works in the model world, so B still sees him in adds, but feels like he wouldn't want her in his 'perfect' life. B then starts an admin job at Littlefinger's. Tyrion and Podrick are visitors, one night P falls asleep in a chair so B places her sweater with name tag over him. This is how J: finds out, freaks out and buys out L's establishment for a night, just to talk to B again

Forlorn by Akifall!

[lexakomtrikrusbitch-blog]

Jaime Lannister x Targaryen reader P.3

Plot: after fourteen years of hiding from the people who slaughtered her family y/n Targaryen is ready to exact revenge on those people but will a certain lion break through her stone walls.

Warnings: none I think

A/n: ok so it’s about time that I posted the next part and I will admit I’m not happy with this chapter but I can promise you that I will try my hardest to make the next one worthwhile, thanks for all your support xx

As soon as Y/n left the confinements of her room she was on edge, the dwarf that strode next to her seemed too dangerous in his little body, the guards too cautious, Bronn looked bored but still seemed like he knew how to use his weapon and Podrik, the squire Tyrion announced as his, hand all too casually placing his hand near his long sword. It was no lie that even if one of them did try anything she could easily slit their throats before they could draw their swords, it wasn't that that made her uneasy, it was the fact that if she did need to kill them she wouldn't get the chance to do what she came here for. Get revenge.

“They should be just here” Y/n said as she walked confidently into the brothel while Tyrion though showed no signs, was slightly anxious, this brothel was filled with Lannister men. A snake, no two now, in a lions den. 

One of the attendants walked up to the party, though the amount of guards should have given off the impression that they were not here to indulge themselves. “is there anything I can help you with?” he asked, looking Y/n up and down with disgust, her dirty clothes making him think she was just a commoner. 

“We are looking for Lord Martell” Tyrion explained just as a male shout of pain was heard from a room nearby and Y/n immediately sprung into action heading straight towards the source with Tyrion and the others on her heals, the attendant shouting that this wasn't allowed.

When Y/n turned into the room where the shout was heard from she saw her uncle standing above a man, his knife wedged into his wrist. “At least you haven't killed anyone yet” Y/n said with a small smirk. 

Y/n took in her surroundings, the attendant of the brothel long gone after seeing the contents in the room. Oberyn’s knife wedged in the the wrist of a man wearing Lannister colours, a soldier. The soldiers friend stood a few feet away watching everything unfold, not making a move to help his friend. Ellaria stood behind Oberyn, tugging at his jacket “You don't need to do this” she whispered over and over. 

Oberyn looked up to the Soldiers friend, a viscous look filled his brown eyes that made Y/n grin, “I am going to take my knife out, if you do not act immediately your friend will bleed out” the soldier nodded, with a sharp motion Oberyn pulled his knife out of the wrist of the whimpering soldier and in a moment both Lannister men were rushing out of the brothel.Oberyn turned towards the the Party that stood behind Y/n and gave a very dramatic bow and not the respectful kind. “Ah Y/n, I see that you led little Tyrion right towards us” Oberyn said in a playful tone.

“Well considering how much you love Kings Landing I figured I might as well tag along to make sure you haven't murdered anyone” she said with a smirk.“As you can see I haven't yet” he said “so if you do not mind I’d like to get back to what I was in the middle of” dismissal.“If you don't mind, Lord Martell, can we have a word?” the smallest Lannister said from behind her, Y/n knew exactly where he stood without having to turn her head, she needed to. “Ah, Lord Tyrion, you'll have to make it quick, I'm rather busy” Oberyn said and threw a lust filled look at his mistress. “I promise” Tyrion said as he guided Y/n’s uncle to the door out the back of the room, leaving Y/n, Ellaria, Bronn and Podrick alone. Ellaria threw a dismissed look at Y/n and stalked off towards another room. 

Y/n and Ellaria were the best of friends when they were with Oberyn, both so desperate for his love and affection but as soon as they were left alone they were at each others throats. Ellaria had always made sure Y/n knew exactly how much she loathed Y/n, ever since she arrived in Dorne as a child. The Targaryen girl cared little though, too caught up in grief to make much of it but as she got older she started to feel the same towards her.

Once Ellaria had stalked out of the room she turned towards the two men behind her, Podrick flinched but Bronn didn't bother looking up from picking his nails. “Are you Tyrion’s body guard, lap dog or does he just enjoy male company?” Podrick chocked at the words that poured out of Y/n’s mouth.

Bronn looked up from picking his nails and said “I think that even if I did enjoy male company Tyrion would not be my type” before Bronn looked like he would rather be anywhere else but here but now there was a sort of amusement in his eyes as he'd finally found someone in this god forsaken palace that had a sense of humour. 

“Personal guard?” Y/n asked 

“I like to think of myself more as legendary hero, known across all lands who Tyrion pays a great deal of money to to keep his lazy ass safe” he chuckled “unfortunately the only part of that story that is wrong is that Tyrion pays me too little”

“You look more like a middle aged drunk to me but” she drawled “still knows how to use a sword”

“You have very good judgment skills milady”

“I also suppose that if asked for you to train with me you'd say yes?” 

Bronn shook his head, as if in disbelief, “I can tell you know how to protect yourself” he said looking your dirty training clothes up and down “lets see how well. Tomorrow at dawn I’ll send pod rick to come and collect you, don't cry if you get stabbed”

“The only crying I’d be doing is crying of laughter after I kick your ass” Y/n said defiantly as she walked out of the brothel leaving Bronn and Podrick looking at each other with amusement in their eyes. 

When Y/n finally climbed into bed that night she couldn't help but think how well her plan was playing out, if she could gain the trust of Bronn, Tyrion’s most trusted body guard she could get close to Tyrion, then shed move on to Cersie, then the King Slayer, with the Lions cubs gone, Y/n could freely move on too Tywin, the man who ordered the mountain to snatch away Elia’s deceased children, Y/n’s dead siblings and run them through with his sword. The man who ordered those horrid things done to her mother, things that sometimes makes Y/n wake up in a cold sweat. The man who Y/n yearned to kill. With the thought of Tywin Lannister fresh in her mind, Y/n fell asleep clutching the bedsheets.

A/n: I know, I know, I said I’d have Jaime in this chapter but what I had planned just didn’t fit in like I hoped but he will make his debut appearance in the next chapter

Tags:

@camu-winchester

@handplucked

@inhumanhacker

[jaimebrienneonline]

Chapters: 10/12 Fandom: Game of Thrones (TV), A Song of Ice and Fire - George R. R. Martin Rating: Mature Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings Relationships: Jaime Lannister/Brienne of Tarth Characters: Jaime Lannister, Brienne of Tarth, Myrcella Baratheon, Sansa Stark, Margaery Tyrell, Tommen Baratheon, Ser Pounce (ASoIaF), Selwyn Tarth, Arya Stark, Gendry Waters, Willas Tyrell, Olenna Tyrell, Tywin Lannister, Tyrion Lannister, Tysha (ASoIaF), Loras Tyrell, Renly Baratheon, Edric Storm, Gatehouse Ami (ASoIaF), Dickon Tarly, Briann the Lizard, Podrick Payne Additional Tags: JBWeek2k18, YesthishappenedagainbutitsthelasttimeIswear Series: Part 3 of O-T-P: A Saga of Epic True Love and Stuff Summary:

Stupid things are supposed to come in three's, right?

The conspiracy sisterhood of Myrcy, Marg, and Sansa is back, determined to plan the most perfect epic wedding of all time for their One True Pairing. Little do they know that maybe, just maybe, this time Hot Uncle Jaime is one step ahead. Shenanigans and secrets abound, and so does Tommen's mini-zoo.

[thundersnowstorm]

thoughts on the first two episodes of got s8

it’s honestly really annoying how they seem to have forgotten that jon bent the knee entirely out of his own volition, that dany was perfectly willing to help the north fight the white walkers without having them bend the knee. the northerners’ ire towards dany is understandable, but fundamentally it was jon’s fault for making such a major decision so impulsively.

he so clearly does not want to be king of anything, i’m honestly surprised dany’s reaction to finding out about r+l was about the threat he posed to her throne. he’s already given up a crown for you bb, he’s not gonna try to make a pass for the iron throne all of a sudden.

the r+l revelation was underwhelming

i feel for sam. i really do. and he has every right to hate dany. but dany was not wrong in burning the tarlys (if we’re going with the established social framework). jon killed plenty of people for disobeying him, has killed plenty of people in battle. the main difference is that we never met those people’s likeable children. so miss me with that dany hate.

dany’s character is honestly all over the place. half the time she’s sweet and bubbly, but then she’ll change in less than a second to be this cold, ruthless queen. and no, i don’t think it’s build up to “mad queen dany”, i think d&d don’t know how to write her consistently and need her to act in certain ways to keep drama going

speaking of drama, i love sansa but jfc….. where’s the girl who said “courtesy is a woman’s armor”? sansa played nice with littlefinger and cersei for seasons, but all of a sudden she doesn’t seem to remember that playing the game means making friends of your enemies. if a queen that your brother has sworn your people to (despite doing it messily as all hell) comes to your castle with dragons to fight your common enemy, it might be a good idea to be at least courteous? being rude is helping absolutely no one. and she certainly has the right to not like dany, but she’s not being particularly smart about how she’s dealing with dany.

this is honestly because of the writing and plotting. sansa’s being played as making smart political decisions and that’s the takeaway you’re supposed to have, but d&d just haven’t truly thought the politics through.

that said, i did really like their scene together in 8x02. it was actually a decent portrayal of two powerful women with different yet equally understandable motivations. 

i’ve been deeply annoyed with jon since season six but i gotta give him credit where credit is due and say at least he’s got his priorities in check. deal with the night king, then politics.

every time they call jon “aegon” i die inside a little bit

needs more ghost. unless they intend to kill ghost in a battle scene. in which case, don’t even let ghost be on screen!!

all the bran memes are hilarious but goddamn i really hate robo!bran. what a butchery of a character who i really do care about.

tyrion trusting cersei was truly the dumbest choice they could’ve made for his character

still don’t care about jaime y’all, sorry

cersei sleeping with euron was the worst and i hated it

theon’s hair looks good! unfortunately the lannisters all have terrible wigs

theon and sansa surprised me, but it has actual build up and it’s the only relationship (with a male, living character) that i can get behind for her. bonding over shared trauma and healing together is my kinda trope

i have mixed feelings about gendry x arya. it was definitely rushed, although that was rather what they were going for (end of the world and all that). seeing arya partially naked…. idk, it’s weird to see a character who has been on the show since she was eleven have a sex scene, even if she is an adult now. i honestly think they should’ve just cut the scene before the nudity, to avoid that weirdness. especially given d&d’s track record with women and nudity.

although it is nice to see them letting arya display more emotions beyond just “assassin”

missandei and grey worm are cute and i love them and i’m p sure he’s gonna die. which i do not want. please don’t kill one of your two black characters, it’d be a real dick move d&d

every time a northerner looks at them, my hackles just go up. stop being racist and leave them alone jfc

ser brienne!!!! she’s so happy and i’m so happy for her and ahhhhhhhh

everyone except dany is in pretty much full black and i hate!!! this!!! wear some color ffs

sansa’s armor outfit looks…..bad

overall it’s been kind of a mess but mostly fun

predictions for the rest of the season:

who was the dumbass who thought putting the noncombatants in the crypts with a bunch of stark corpses in full armor was a good idea??? my theory that westeros has a total of maybe five braincells has yet to be disproved.

no one in the crypts is safe next ep and i am Worried.

unless the show seriously deviates from the books, jaime is killing cersei. not looking forward to it tbh.

there is a decent chance that winterfell is gonna burn and i am not ready Emotionally.

characters that are gonna die: cersei, euron, qyburn, zombie!gregor, jon, grey worm, night king

characters that are probably gonna die but i’m not sure: theon, dany, jaime, jorah, melisandre (if she’s still around?), all three dragons (and possibly ghost but nooooo)

characters that are most likely gonna survive: sansa, arya, sam, yara, gendry

characters that i hope will live but might die for pointless shock value: gilly, missandei, brienne, podrick, lyanna mormont

characters i have no clue about: varys, tyrion, bran, davos, bronn, tormund, dolorous edd

my hope is that the show ends with the iron throne melted down and seven independent kingdoms. thematically, that’d be the most satisfying. i don’t trust d&d with themes tho so we’ll see.

so far it seems like next ep is gonna be the Big Epic Battle where they defeat the night king, then the last three eps are about dealing with cersei and picking up the pieces. idk how i feel about this, since it kinda frames cersei as the Big Bad. we’ll see how it ends up.

[anauthoroftheoldandnew]

Me Rewriting GOT some parts of Seasons 6-7 and possibly a bit of things for Season 8

Seasons 6-7

First, Varys kills Kevan Lannister, the only remaining person who actually kept the Lannister family afloat while Jaime is gone in the Riverlands. Varys loudly declares for Dany and Cersei is told about this. Her son Tommen is killed and Myrcella perhaps dies with some infection from her ear (in the books, her ear was cut off by Arianne Martell’s tactics and plots) which leads Cersei to be more insane. The Sparrows have not been dealt with yet and Cersei in her grief and rage blows up the Sept of Baelor like she does in the books.

Jaime leaves her truly because he had seen the Mad King do it. Margaery and her brother Loras still dies but the Tyrells under Willas Tyrell and his younger brother with Olenna will avenge them and joins Dany’s side. Cersei takes the Iron Throne as she does in the end of Season Six and causes a break up of the Lannister family in factions (in my idea, I want that all the Lannisters of Lannisport and Casterly Rock to at least show up) and there is a faction supporting Jaime who has been freed from his vows and Cersei who takes the throne.

Jaime finds Sansa in the Vale after defying what he did and frees all the prisoners from the Red Wedding and banishes the Freys from Riverrun and forcing justice upon them. He thensaves her from Littlefinger, with Sansa causing Littlefinger to die after she manages to say the truth about his killing of Lysa and Jon Arryn (In the books she does see Littlefinger kill Lysa as is in the show but was in the room when Lysa confessed to helping Petyr with killing her husband.)

He promises to take her to Winterfell. Cersei summons all her remaining banners and she names Qyburn as her hand and lord commander to Robert Strong or reanimated Mountain. The Westerlands pummels into chaos and Cersei has to choice but to make the streets of Lannisport and the caverns of Casterly Rock bloody.

Cersei loses against Devan Lannister, one of her cousins who is totally on Jaime’s side and manages to kick Cersei and her forces out of Lannisport and Casterly Rock.

Cersei settles in Castamere with her army barely able and also where she takes all the silvers in the mine with labors of the common folk in order to pay the debts of the Crown to Braavos and just as we have seen in the show, the Iron Bank supports her and the explanation here is that Braavos hates Dany because she is a Valyrian and most of the people in Braavos are descendants of Valyrian slaves who escaped and founded the city and hates what Dany stands for and most especially hates her dragons.

This causes problems in the Free Cities as war looms there which causes Dany’s free states there to be ruined and reestablished into the old system which Dany does not manage to replace at all.

Cersei is told by Qyburn of some of the ways the Dornish managed to repel the dragons considering they are the only part of the Seven Kingdoms that was not conquered by Aegon and his sisters. So, they start mass producing large ballistic crossbows to defend the city. Cersei allies with Euron and Victarion sides with Dany. He manages to bring damage to his brother but he is killed by Euron.

Cersei manages to borrow money from the Iron Bank and in come the sellswords and she fights off the Martells and the Tyrells, but she is just barely able to hold them off. Cersei tries to rally the Stormlords to her cause but they ignore her commands and Edric Storm is found (one of Robert’s book bastards) and is legitimised by the Stormlords as a Baratheon and raises their lands against Cersei. Dany names him Lord of Storm’s End and legitimises him fully. Dany organizes her army and incorporates it with the Reach, the Stormlands and Dorne plus her own army.

Jon Snow is revived in the North with Melisandre's help after she uses Shireen as a sacrifice after Jon wargs into Ghost and as he does, also decides to leave the Wall in order to go back to Winterfell. Davos comes to Castle Black with Rickon (He is in the books, looking for Rickon to gain Stannis the allegiance of House Manderly.) Rickon is grown and Jon and him meet for the first time in a long time. Stannis defeats Ramsey Bolton in the battle who killed his father and became Warden of the North and Lord of the Dreadfort and Winterfell.

But he also dies during a battle against the Freys and some of the other houses who are about to arrive to kill him. Yara/Asha escapes and finds out she’s pregnant (she had sex in the books.) and brings Theon with her. They find out that Victarion is dead and Euron plans to find them next.

Sansa and Jaime arrives near the North where they find the Brotherhood without Banners and saves Podrick and Brienne, where Lady Stoneheart is. Jaime is almost killed by Stoneheart for being accused of being part of the Red Wedding, Sansa saves him and tells him he had been saved by her from Littlefinger and proceeds to tell her about everything she had suffered. Stoneheart spares Jaime’s life. They all decide, along with Jaime’s Lannister host, to take back Winterfell.

Jon decides to pledges to keep his brother safe and Davos demands justice for Shireen after he finds out. Jon banishes Melisandre from the North and she flees to Dragonstone where the last remaining stronghold of Stannis exists. Bran and Meera arrive in the Wall and are reunited with Jon.

Sansa and the rest of the gang arrive at Greywater Watch where Howland Reed is and Howland lets them pass through and comes with them to the venture, knowing what he must tell Jon Snow. Jaime is questioned about his loyalties but he says he has loyalty only to restoring his honor and his good name and to do the right things from now on.

Cersei is surrounded and Dany makes certain to siege the city, with Tyrells, Martells and Baratheon forces with her own. She gives it time until she loses patience and flies over the city. Drogon is injured by the ballistic crossbows which causes Dany to be angry. Cersei sees the dragons from the Red Keep and already has a plan of escape with Qyburn. Unbeknowst to Dany, she burns the city to the ground with Drogon's fire as she burns the Red Keep not knowing the wildfyre underneath the keep. Dany is in regret and horror as she does this and Tyrion calms her down, trying to bring her back to her mission. She will still have to restore peace.

Jaime's host and Sansa arrive at near Winterfell to see that the Freys and other houses hold Winterfell. Sansa shows herself to them as Lady of Winterfell. They are shocked that Jaime is there and Lady Catelyn in such a state. Jaime defends himself and says that he has taken Sansa home in his own accord. The Freys are killed in a revengeful way outside of Winterfell. Sansa is established at Lady of Wintefell, Lady Stoneheart kills herself and is buried in crypts, Ned's bones are finally taken by Hallis Mollen into Winterfell.

Dorne is taken over by Ellaria Sand with her daughters after Trystane and Doran are killed. Arianne Martell finally decides to go home and take control, starting a civil war with Ellaria, which causes deteoration in Dany's ranks. Sam in Oldtown where he meets Sarella Sand and Marwyn the Mage and learns the ways of Maestery. There is where he discovers the tome of the Song of Ice and Fire for Sarella and learns much more from Marwyn magic from Marwyn and finds out of Jon's parentage.

Things I would have on Season 8

Arya killing Cersei in Casterly Rock to fulfill the Valonqar prophecy. Dany beginning to doubt her purpose after what she did to King's Landing. Jon Snow finding out about his parentage. The Stark children reuniting. Arya to meet Nymeria again (properly) Arya meeting Gendry again. Ser Davos finally having some peace in his life. The Red Priests. IRON BORN KICKING ASS! The Fellowship of Winter. Dany and Jon meeting. Jaime redemption arc coming to completion. Brienne and Jaime finally getting together. The Battle for the Dawn. Peace returning to Westeros.

I know that's long and it's pretty late here in Asia but shit the more I'm reading into the books, the more I wanted many things for the show.

[wenchofdeath-blog]

#gamesofplants #plantvengers and #goodplantomens update! (1-3) Sansa got split in to 3 plants! She was busting out of her bigger pot so I split her up. Meet Agnes Nutter and Anathema Device! The 3rd will be named if it works. I planted just some of Sansa’s roots. (4) Podrick got an aggressive haircut. (5) Davos got replanted to a new pot. (6) Thor got a hair cut as well. (7) Tyrion got some new soil. He always looks a little sad in winter (he really doesn’t like the north’s climate) (8) Seedlings!! Once they sprout they’ll all get names (some already picked out). In the tray are Sage, lemon basil. Lemon Balm, Daisies, Forget-me-nots, Baby’s breath, and Scabiosa flowers. Stay tuned for pretty things. https://www.instagram.com/p/B8owZR9l5PN/?igshid=xy54qmss6ij6

[admittedlynotspartacus]

“Game of Thrones” Season VII: Episode 5 - Let’s Do the Time Warp Again

WARNING: SPOILERS for the latest episode below, so if you haven’t seen it and don’t know yet who dies, who fucks who, and who finally stopped rowing, turn back now.

THE ROAD TO KING’S LANDING

So right from the get-go, we have Bronn and Jaime popping up like -

And Bronn’s pretty much just like -

But most importantly, the man who was sinking to the bottom of the river at the end of last episode swam to safety with full armor and a golden hand!

But if you want logic, look elsewhere because D&D spent an entire episode last season with Arya doing parkour and now THEY HAVE NO TIME!!!

P-Dinky is the only one looking for Jaime, which seems crazy considering he was like the general of the Lannister army and seems like an important enemy, but whatever. And honestly, maybe P-Dinky’s not even looking for him, he could totally just be like -

Anyway, it matters not because the Dothraki are marching all the Lannisters to D-Baby like -

except at the top of the rock is a giant hungry dragon and a crazy lady who’s like “I’m not here to murder you” when just a few hours ago she was like -

She’s predictably giving her same old “Bend the knee or die” spiel, and some people bend the knee but then the dragon’s like -

and totally torches Daddy Tarly and Dickface.

and then all the non-believers are like -

KING’S LANDING

Jaime used the teleportation device and struts into Cersei’s room looking like he just did a full day of Tough Mudder. And Cersei’s like, “Don’t worry bro, we’re gonna beat her.” But Jaime’s, like, “Shut your mouth. Pack your bags.

DRAGONSTONE

D-Baby is back on her dragon, which is charging full fucking speed at J-Snow like -

But J-Snow just whips out his inner Caesar Milan like -

and Drogon's instantly like -

And lemme tell you, D-Baby slides off that dragon like -

#MustLoveDragons.

By the way, did you know that D-Baby thinks of her dragons as her children?

D&D just wanted to drop that little nugget in there one more time before Jorah Mormont pops up like -

And suddenly Dragonstone just got a lot like -

I’m Team Jorah. Always.

Somewhere in here there’s also a scene with Varys where’s he’s basically just like -

WINTERFELL

Bran’s taking a break from reciting Jaden Smith tweets to summon all the Winterfell ravens like -

and they’re flying for a long time. And they’re just kinda like, Snow. Wall. Then boom. White Walkers.

And Bran’s spying and it’s totally going well until the fucking Night King is just like -

OLDTOWN

But Bran does send a raven to Oldtown, which of course causes MORE heartbreaking conflict between Sam and National Treasure Jim Motherfucking Broadbent. And more importantly, more Harry Potter references. Because Sam is basically like, “Be brave, Professor. Be brave like my mother.” And you can tell NTJMFB wants to just be like -

But alas, he’d be rocking the boat of the other maesters too much.

So Sam runs to the Restricted Section, he grabs a bunch of scrolls and shit, he takes Gilly, he takes Little Baby Boyhood and he’s just like -

DRAGONSTONE

J-Snow also gets a raven, and at first he’s like, “OMG Bran’s alive!” OMG ARYA’S alive!” And we think J-Snow may actually have to deal with legit emotions, but then he’s just like, “Winter is coming.”

So P-Dinky comes up with a plan to do a private screening of An Inconvenient Truth for Cersei in the form of J-Snow and Jorah... going to capture... a wight? And like... bringing it to her... to show her...???

KING’S LANDING

Part of the above plan is that Davos will smuggle P-Dinky into King’s Landing to meet with Jaime so they can get the audience for the screening. So they use the teleportation device to get there in no time flat, of course. And the bro reunion goes about as awkwardly as imagined.

Meanwhile, Davos is like, “I have business in Fleabottom. And we’re all like -

Sure enough it’s Him...

But of course D&D ruin the moment real quick by having Davos literally say, “Wasn’t sure I’d find you. Thought you might still be rowing.”

In actuality, he does have a point; you’d expect his arms to be a LITTLE bigger.

But really, he hasn’t been rowing all that time. He’s been forging shit, but all the while like -

So he’s like, “Fuck this. I’m ready,” and he takes out this giant hammer that literally looks like an inflatable toy I had when I was a child. Except it super fucks up these two Monty Python guards when Davos fails to distract them with a Viagra pitch.

Jaime brings the Al Gore news to Cersei, who’s suddenly open to it.

And she’s got some more news as well -

DRAGONSTONE

Gendry and Davos are fucking back, and truly someone is gonna open up a fucking alternate dimension with all this time-hopping, MAYBE YOU GUYS SHOULDN’T HAVE SPENT SO MUCH DAMN TIME WITH PODRICK SLAYING VADGE IN KING’S LANDING BACK IN SEASON THREE!!! But more importantly J-Snow meets Gendry and he’s like, “You look leaner.” And Gendry’s like, “You look shorter.”

WINTERFELL

So remember how last week Arya was like -

Yeah, now she’s like -

Because conflict. So later on when Littlefinger is being Littlefinger and creeping around, Arya’s sneaking around after him like-

Like, girl. You trained with Faceless Assassins for TWO FUCKING SEASONS. This is the best you can do?!?

Anyway, Littlefinger totally knows what she’s doing, because she’s literally just hiding behind pillars.

So he leaves something for her in the form of the letter the Small Council made Sansa write to Robb in Season 1 begging him to bend the knee. In other words, it’s gonna fuel Arya’s newfound suspicion of her sister. Naturally, Littlefinger is pleased.

EASTWATCH

Our last fucking stop on our whirlwind tour of Westeros this week is Eastwatch, which for being the title of the episode is a very brief stop. We’ve got all the dudes here - J-Snow, Jorah, Gendry, and Davos meeting with Tormund, who’s really hung up on Brienne.

They team up with even more dudes when Tormund reveals he’s imprisoned Beric Dondarrion, The Hound, and The Dude. So they’re gonna join in on this wight expedition.

And then they’re off. Beyond the wall. And from there, it’s a Michael Bay wet dream.

BODY COUNT: 4 (RIP Daddy Tarly and Dickface) BOOB COUNT: None EPISODE GRADE: B

SER POUNCE’S STRAY THOUGHTS

Nobody says “Cunt” like Bronn.

Right from the get-go, there’s a curve-ball with the War of the Two Queens - we all kinda figured this season would end with an all-out brawl between Cersei and Daenerys, right? Now that seems unlikely, at least in a militaristic sense.

Daenerys is turning evil clue: Just last week she was all, “I’m a ruler because people chose me,” but now she’s forcing people to bend the knee out of fear. That said, I expected more to be done with Tyrion’s feeling icky about the whole situation. It felt like we were being set up for more conflict there that vanished around the halfway point of the episode.

Daenerys doesn’t know Jon is a Targaryen, so her driving Drogon straight at him is pretty crazy. I mean, we gotta believe if he hadn’t dog-whispered it it would have eaten him, right? What the fuck was her move there?

We’ve only seen three people interact with dragons as Jon did this episode. He did it, Daenerys has done it, and Tyrion. There’s been a long-standing book theory that Tyrion is a Targaryen. And the dragon does have three heads.

The whole wight thing seems really stupid, right?

And another stupid thing: the key to Jon’s parentage randomly hiding in a book in Oldtown. But cleverly done, I think, with Sam ignoring it. So you gotta figure both Bran and he are needed to reveal the truth to Jon - Bran knows that he’s not a bastard - that he’s a Targaryen, and Sam (with Gilly’s info) will know that Rhaegar didn’t abduct and rape Lyanna - it was a consensual love affair.

Sansa will be queen theory proof: Once again being the one person thinking about the realm and the future as opposed to what will be best for the moment at hand.

I loved pretty much everything about Gendry’s re-entrance - the Jon-him dynamic mirroring their fathers’ most of all. And I’m amending my Sansa is queen at the end, Tyrion is her hand, to adding Gendry on as Sansa’s king. It would be the Baratheon-Stark marriage that was meant all along, plus a Lannister (possibly Targaryen) on the side.

This pregnancy news is crazy after I brought up her possibly dying in childbirth last week. Do we believe it? It’s a huge power play on Jaime regardless of its legitimacy.

Where’s Theon?

Where’s Uncle Freddie Mercury?

Where’s Barack? Isn’t Michelle worried?

All right, so we gotta figure there will be some casualties in the North during what seems destined to be another big money episode. I’m calling J-Snow safe, same with Gendry or else why bring him back? Anyone else could go, although Beric or Thoros wouldn’t sting much. But Tormund, Davos, or Jorah going might be happening...

NEXT WEEK: Hardhome: Bigger, Longer, and Uncut.