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starry-bi-sky · 6 months ago

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on a completely separate note; shizun luo binghe with a disciple shen yuan who fell into the abyss??? *thinks about LBH canonically stealing SQQ's corpse for 5 years* he'd hallucinate i think. like, like visual and audial hallucinations.

Keeps thinking he's seeing SQQ in the corner of his eyes, or wandering between the trees, amongst a group of disciples. Thinks he hears him calling for him, but its just the wind or another disciple.

Gets Xiu Ya reforged but patently fucking refuses to make a sword mound. Because his disciple Is Not Dead :))) There was No Body. He's Not Dead. And If You keep Insisting That He Is, He's Gonna Skewer You :). He's holding onto Xiu Ya so he can return his most favored disciple's sword when he returns. It's on his hip right next to Zheng Yang where it's supposed to be.

Also this motherfucker?? does not sleep btw. He has the image of SQQ, wide eyed and hysterical and standing at the mouth of the abyss burned into his fucking eyelids. Can't use the dreamscape to escape it either because he keeps trying to save him and either he does and it's an incredibly cruel trick to wake up to, or he doesn't and he gets his heart broken in several different pieces again.

There is no convincing this man that Shen Qingqiu is dead. Absolutely nothing at all. He is buried so deep in denial that moles would be jealous of how deep he is. He keeps making tea for two in the bamboo house only to remember that it's just him. SQQ's fans are hiding everywhere, little reminders of his presence. He goes to wake up SQQ on the mornings he sleeps in-- only to find the room empty.

#svsss #luo binghe #svsss au #scum villain #scum villian self saving system #shen yuan #shen qingqiu #disciple shen yuan #lbh. visibly exhausted and with twitchy eyes: im fine :) | everyone else: ho no the fuck you ARENT.#SQQ was hysterical not because he found out LBH was half-demon but bc he was having a long-awaited mental breakdown over his autonomy :)#or (limited) lack thereof. he was having a sudden onset crisis of mortality and was handling at quite literally the WORST time. oops #im thinking very hard that LBH would never push his disciple into the abyss especially with no system to force him to. so SQQ either #had to goad him into it (failing always) or throw himself in. he ended up doing it himself but not before some very impressive hysterics.#BUT ALSO. IF THIS HAD BEEN WHERE SQQ WAS THE HALF-HEAVENLY DEMON INSTEAD IT WOULD'VE BEEN SO GREAT.#and by great i mean horribly angsty bc SQQ is NOT doing too hot and has. in very SY-like fashion. convinced himself that LBH will kill him #when he finds out he's a demon. so when it comes out i have this mental image of him lunging at LBH and LBH flinches back. but SQQ wraps hi #hands around the blade of Zheng Yang and yanks it up so the tip of the blade is digging into his chest where is heart is. LBH can't yank th #sword away without risking slicing into SQQ's hands. SQQ's hair has fallen out of its tail/bun and is now messily spilling down his #back and its NO helping the kinda deranged look he has going on. he's visibly shaking and his eyes keep flittering away and back at LBH's #face. SQQ is looking at the messages from the system warning him that he has to go into the abyss or punishment will occur. he's like.#rambling though. talking about how shizun doesn't *like* unclean things and there is nothing more unclean than a demon. like he is #INSISTING. LBH can't?? get a fucking word in. actually. SY isn't listening that much either anyways. too overwhelmed with the system and #the amount of stress he's under and his crumbling mental state and the innate and primal desire to live even when he's standing in front of #his own executioner. it all ends with him sitting on the ground at the lip of the abyss with his hair falling in his face. he looks so #unkempt and fallen apart and so distinctly *non-Shen Qingqiu* that LBH feels physically ill over it. tears are streaming down SQQ's face #and despite everything he is smiling. its not a nice smile. its a very frayed falling apart at the seams about to crack smile.#he tells shizun not to worry about staining his blade with this disciple's filthy blood because this disciple will take care of it himself.#and then he falls into the abyss before luo binghe can so much as grab him. the only reason LBh doesn't literally jump in after him is bc #he was numb with shock and the abyss was already closed before he could feel his legs again :]

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drenched-in-sunlight · 7 months ago

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saying this as respectfully as possible but. Do not put fandom content creators on a pedestal. We are also just fans contributing to a community just as you are. We have boundary on our own work and that’s it. What I say is not and should not be considered sth the whole fandom should listen to. I’m just a normal ass person ranting about things on my blog. If it does not have a fandom tag for others to engage in, do not make it out to be me trying to start fights or addressing the whole community. Because it’s not.

I’ve said it before and I will say it again, my art, my lore talk, is biased. I’ve never tried to hide that I view Marika a certain way and will always develop my theory following that base assumption.

Aside from translation stuffs and pointing out in-game items, everything else I say you can look at it, agree or disagree, and move on to form your own opinions. Just because I draw stuffs doesn’t mean you get to saddle me with responsibilities about managing fandom expectations. What the hell? I’m a fan artist, I’m the last person who you should look at for “leaderism” (?) WHAT?

I can and will be a hater in my own space, like I know sometimes other artists will just post their stuffs and not engage too heavily with fandom, and for a while I did try to do that here (because I’m already a dramatic ass on twitter), that’s just not me though.

You will get art and you will get my opinions as well.

#asking ppl to [celebrate different takes] is... WHAT?#different takes as in well I think she likes apples and you think she likes grapes. yeah that’s some fun discussion to be have #but different takes as in the fundamental of a character’s drive and personality??? NO #let’s put that down very clear here #I can still read fics where Marika is cold and calculate and manipulative as long as I can see there’re layers to it and the author #set it up in a way that I can see they got her backstory and build those layers based on that #and then there are ppl who literally only portray her as omg evil girlboss 101 let’s blame everything on this cardboard character #then I click back.#and there r ppl who might not vibe with how i portray her and they can ignore me. THAT'S OK TOO. we r in our own space.#it’s as simple as that!#ever since the dlc is out i literally could see the amount of ppl blocking me go up and im just “ok” because i do go around muting ppl too.#that's normal fandom space managing experience. pls do that #lore discussion is for ppl to engage in so u say ur piece i say mine and we can continue or not depending on situation #but FANWORK? leave each other alone or be a hater in ur own space ok?#personal #also where are these ppl who have been defending Marika at... because if u exclude me #and some others i can count on one hand. where are these ppl?#ppl saying headass stuffs about the HS aren't even Marika fans or engage too much in fandom to begin with #meanwhile u can't even find one youtube lore essay that says anything good about her #ppl are even trying to give Messmer's mother position to GEQ for no goddamn reason #like where is this overwhelming support for Marika at cuz as the active Marika stan around im not seeing it

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bakudekublogblog · 11 months ago

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kacchan really is so funny for being like BUT WHAT ABOUT BAKUDEKU CANON when he finds out izuku is quirkless

#bakudeku #bkdk #mha spoilers #bnha spoilers #mha leaks #he really is like WHAT ABOUT US #WHAT ABOUT EVERYTHING WE BEEN THROUGH #izuku is such a Gabriella too he DO be running away from his feelings every chance he gets #what about US IZUKU WHAT ABOUT OUR MARRIAGE #WHAT IS THE POINT OF THIS MANGA IF WE ARENT MARRIED #and Izuku is like oh no my baby is on too many painkillers hahaha he’s not proposing to me right now that’s silly #if he was proposing that would mean he loved me and I can’t accept that reality I’m too much of a burden #I can’t think of myself long enough to realize I am valued #two months ago Izuku was like :) I’m so blessed kacchan talks to me almost normally #how is he supposed to process he was just proposed to by that same boy #like he’s also just gone through almost losing him he’s probably like I’m lucky he’s alive and breathing near me #and kacchan’s like I LOVE YOU I WANT YOU FOREVER #Izuku is overwhelmed ok give him some slack

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javierduffy · 23 days ago

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modern au

#this looks awful but i struggle so heavily not making silly drawovers look awful cuz i don't want to put too much effort in but it turns #out that i start relying on the og image too heavily and then everything is just uncanny but whatever. this one is too funny to me and i #don't want to redraw it cux i've been feeling ill the past couple of days and it's so distracting and easy to get overwhelmed cuz of it #anyway they're so funny to me :( i miss yhem #rdr2 #red dead redemption 2 #kieran duffy #javier escuella #javieran #hero draws sometimes #hero's not funny #image #art #meme

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idontmindifuforgetme · 1 month ago

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SO happy I’m taking a couple gap years bc I get to pursue all the things I wanted to pursue as a kid and I will go into med school so satisfied

#And it’s all sprucing up my app so it all adds up and everything is sunny and beautiful #And it’s making me all the more excited for med school and giving me such a solid window to abs ace the mcat #I feel like talking ab this too much is a jinx but having no responsibilities aside from studying and working on self development has been #Such a privilege even tho I’m tech still grinding #Like it’s different bc I’m grinding on my own terms now wrt research and studying and clinical hrs and volunteering #There are overwhelming days bc I’m doing a lot but overall this has been good for me #I did also graduate one early tho so that gave me a lot more leeway

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skeletoninthemelonland · 1 year ago

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"The Exocannis Ressurection"

#been experiencing (seasonal) difficulties to feel satisfied with my art. especially if it's digital #i can't make fanart of other things i enjoy besides fnaf or listen to new music without feeling 'unknown' to it #everything is too much. new stuff becomes overwhelming and discouraging. people might not like it. (IT KEEPS HAPPENING RAGHHH))#so im breaking the cycle by trying something that i came up with months ago (AGAIN)#as some people might know. the character i drew here is Hunter. and he's my OC #he's from a story i created during the pandemic. it was originally called 'The Other Side'#i got obsessed and started making art. it truly felt like i was part of a huge community. when it was just me in my room #i feel like i said this before. but after Behind The Codes. this story is probably going to be the next thing i'll be working with #starbsart #original character

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johaerys-writes · 3 months ago

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HI! I MADE A PATREON!!

I will still be posting my art and writing for free here and on AO3, but I'll also be posting a few extra goodies over on Patreon, like some bonus WIPs, sketches, thoughts on writing/writing tips, behind-the-scenes commentaries on a chapter or one-shot each month, as well as voting polls on what I should write/draw next! (I'll probably be able to offer more tiers/rewards in the future, based on feedback and what I can comfortably create each month)

If you like what I do, it would mean a lot if you could support me by subscribing! If you can't commit to a monthly pledge but still want to help out, feel free to buy me a ko-fi. Whether you can support me monetarily or not, I still appreciate you so much and thank you for being here 🥹🫶

(T.S. I also posted a sneaky little WIP of the next chapter of Fates so feel free to check it out there! 😁)

#yes hello i'm finally making a post about it #not to get too PersonalTM but i've been struggling a lot with burnout and overwhelm this year #and i'm still working too much but hopefully i'll be able to reduce that by a few hours if everything goes well #but yeah anyway i'm honestly very grateful to anyone supporting my work in any way #whether that is comments/kudos/asks/reblogs it really means a lot

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yuri-for-businesswomen · 1 year ago

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im not autistic but i believe in their beliefs (because i share like 80 % of symptoms typical for autistic women with yall)

#overstimulation? check #bursts of anger? check #overwhelmed in social situations and needing a lot of downtime in my safe space? having comfort people? check #seeming ‚weird‘ to other people? check #always feeling like i dont fit in with the girls? check #overly excited over small things? check #sensory issues? check #never knowing when its my turn to talk in conversation? check #people reacting weirdly when i interject in conversations? check #monologueing about my special interests? check #special talent? semi check because i dont think im that good at drawing but i used to get in trouble in school for drawing too much #often say inappropriate/inappropriately frank and honest things unintentionally? check #extremely analytical thinking especially regarding social relationships but unable to make me less weird? check #having been the odd one in my family and school and at work all my life? check #having specific rules how everything has to be done? needing rituals and structure and a controlled environment? check #social anxiety as a result? CHECK #the list goes on…#its the adhd/bpd mix i think #personal

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buglover77 · 2 years ago

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ACROSS THE SPIDERVERSE SPOILERS

I cannot get over how Miles is Gwen’s safe person.

Miles is so her safe person that she CANNOT SENSE HIM. Her body physically cannot register him as a threat. Her spider sense does not tell her he’s there when invisible because HER BODY CANNOT BE ON GUARD WITH HIM. GRRRRR.

She can sense him across universes when he’s in danger but she can’t sense him when he’s five feet away because his intentions are so…not malicious. And she feels so safe with him. And trusts him so completely. That she literally can’t sense him.

#whether you ship it romantically or just like the friendship Gwen and Miles are everything to me #she makes so many mistakes over and over and it all just comes from this overwhelming position of being a kid and NOT KNOWING BETTER #Gwen Stacy lost her Peter and wasn’t ready to lose her Miles #and she hasn’t he’s right there #and she CAN’T SENSE HIM #she thinks she is all alone in the world and she’s NOT she ISN’T #her best friend is RIGHT THERE #she just loves him too much to feel him #gwen stacy #miles morales #spider gwen #spiderman #into the spider verse #across the Spiderverse #spoilers #miles and gwen

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raywardreal · 1 month ago

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any news on other parts of the toyhouse being archived? i dont really join discord servers linked to things like this & would like to know if us here on tumblr will have access.

we have everything i can think of in regards to the toyhouse saved currently! i dont have it all organized in the google drive were wokring on yet though.

so far i have everything from my darkermatters archive reorganized there, all the character icons, and screenshots and html downloads of all the character pages, minus cometcare stuff as me and rainbowmewz were working on that in a different drive initially, so we still have to move that over. everything else has been saved by other people, and will be added to the larger drive eventually

@dawn-ward (hope its alright to tag you!) has made archives of the side story images (it has everything that isnt sparklecare, cometcare, or darkermatters), and the fics.

and heres the link to the servers google drive, though again, its a massive work in progress currently and is missing a lot that we still have to upload and organize there specifically

someone in the server has all of the sparklecare and cometcare images downloaded, so were just waiting on them to upload it somewhere in regards to that

EDIT: all of the toyhouse stuff has been added!

#sorry for the delayed reaponse #i was unsure of whether or not we were allowed to share the drive link so publically so i was waiting to get the okay from archao #totally get you in regards to not wanting to join the discord btw. its definetly overwhelming #i was barely managing the stress this morning and the whole toyhouse deletion was a complete emotional rollercoaster for me #a lot of this stuff was just barely saved in time i spent literally all of friday saving character pages 🥲#but yeah i hope all of this was clear! things are a bit messy on the google drive side of things currently ill be honest #im trying to just slowly chip away at organizing stuff without compromising my own wellbeing too much #as this whole past week has genuinely started to take a toll on my physical health #but i can absolutely understand how this can be frustrating to those unwilling (or unable) to join the discord #it wont be purely within the server eventually! its just taking a lot of work to sort through everything with #not a lot of people actively working on the google drive #compared to the amount of server members #sparklecare archive #its literally 2am for me right now apologies if this is disjointed #im going to sleep like immediately after posting this

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fortes-fortuna-iogurtum · 9 hours ago

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turns out poetry and fiction aren't that great when you can't feel any connection with them 90% of the time

#pray for me please #it's finals week and i'm really struggling #I'm so tired and I don't know how to deal with all the things running around in my head that are bent on distracting me from the work I #*need* to do #and my friends are lovely and supportive but they have their own work and trials too #and I'm struggling at the moment #I don't need any more bible verses I think I actually just need to be angry enough to finish this stupid assignment #and then every other stupid assignment that has to be done before the end of the week #but i've been struggling to feel anything much less anger for a while #just too tired and overwhelmed and too used to hiding my emotions from everyone. it's exhausting but I'm fairly good at it.#so again -- prayer please. that i'll be able to get through all of this and not give up #and then I'll deal with all the things I need to deal with later on when there is time and space to do so #(goodness knows there won't be much time and space at home but there will at least not be any class work so that will be nice)#(i'm so tired of feeling angry!! but it turns out that underneath everything else there's a whole lotta anger still!!! and smothering it #down doesn't seem to be helping anything!! aaahggrgrgghshdghdgs)#(and unfortunately all the work I've been doing to give up my propensity towards control seems to have just left me feeling #apathetic and pointless. there has to be a line between obsessively controlling every aspect of your life you can manage #and just giving up and not being able to see the point in anything anymore. right????)

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eusuntgratie · 2 months ago

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channeling my rage at my republican senator's response to my message from last week about musk's overreach into making more calls today about the cfpb. got the little one to mail the 5 vote forward letters i prepped yesterday and this morning on the way to school.

TODAY IS THE DEI ECONOMIC BLACKOUT! don't spend anything if you can, if there's something you need to purchase today shop local and spend cash.

don't succumb to despair and overwhelm! make a call or a donation! bid on something for fandom trumps hate! take a walk! check on a friend or a neighbor! even just sitting at home not spending any money today will make an impact!

#i can't change the world all by myself #but i refuse to give these fuckers what they want #and i will teach my kid to stand up and fight back #that she has agency and power too #if you are overwhelmed and don't know what to do my dms are open #i certainly dont know everything or even much of anything but i'm always happy to share what im doing and why #or to encourage you when you need it <3 #i love you friends in my phone #we'll get through this one day and one actionable step at a time

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kiwibongos · 8 months ago

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bla bla something about having a high status and heavy responsibilities, never learning how to process trauma or their own feelings in general, barely being able to take care of themselves due to looking after the others because they feel like they must be selfless leaders since they're the most physically capable in recovery out of everyone else after the game (but not mentally), but sometimes it just becomes too much.

they may suck with feelings but they understand eachothers pain

#is this anything at all #i just think theyd get along very very well. neglected rich blondies unite #everything just gets really overwhelming for them i think #they also did really messed up shit as remnants #but arent able to acknowledge it entirely bc they love their friends too much to care #sonia says shes a princess before shes a human so she lives by that duty. even if its gone #fuyuhiko just moves robotically. entirely cold except for knowing he has people to protect now #so he makes it his mission because thats how he's always lived #all while at the same time he and sonia dont really converse well at first #but sitting silently together is enough #bongo art #art #digital art #sdr2 #danganronpa #super danganronpa 2 #danganronpa goodbye despair #danganronpa 2 goodbye despair #fuyuhiko kuzuryu #sonia nevermind

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whippetcrimes · 29 days ago

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Puppy is being born today probably!!!

#just saw the breeder say her temp dropped last night #exciiiited #need to finally start doing some reading about becoming a multi dog house #want to do everything as well as possible and set everyone up for a happy life together #its almost weird having some anxiety about it when my house growing up always had 3+ dogs in it #idr my parents doing anything in particular to introduce. even when i brought home my sam #i was 14 but i have no memory of his first time being in the house and meeting our other dogs...#angel was such a mama and loved babies so im sure she instantly loved him but the other dogs?? idk #weird to remember picking him (he was a craiglist pup) and getting him in the car and even some of the ride home. talking names with my dad #but that's it #i just want misty and felony to be friiiends #and I'm a little worried about how jealous Misty has been lately. of her toys in particular #and she doesn't really like puppies very much tbh. they annoy and overwhelm her. (even though she's often overbearing with other dogs)#she's been doing this thing with visiting dogs where she'll grab a toy and bring it near them. shaking it around and being playful #but also with lots of growlies. not mean intense growls. but definitely more intense than when im playing with her and she's growly #it almost seems like a play with me but don't touch my toy kind of thing. not really sure what to make of it #if the dog grabs the toy she'll drop it and bark at them. and immediately reclaim the toy if the dog drops it #her preferred way to play would just be to run and shoulder bump and chase and be chased #but she'll do that whole thing with sticks too #if we're outside #idk. time to start reading and learning more #guess ive just been waiting until it felt real

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microwavetoaster-selfships · 17 days ago

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SiirrrrRE

MILES AXELROD GET THE FFFUCK

OUT OF MY WORKPLACE GARAGAGE MOTHERFUCKGIJTBT GOD DAMMITTT!!!!!! AWEERRHAAAAAAAAAAHAHGYG

All it cost me was my glasses and the massive grime and grease stain across my forehead now. I swear I'm not beyond-fucked insane when I say that the damn oil smelt like brown sugar what was that. Think that was the messiest I ever got fixing a car cause magically I did not care about anything anymore.

I uh. Hit the tag limit but I'm sure this will still pop up if I search his name in my blog search feature.

#you canyou can see int he photo the stearing is on the right. it has clutch and wverything.#same model same make same year fuck fuck fuck fuck fuckfuck #i have seen. ONE other land rover here. but it was white. this one is. g.greeb.#was trying not to be a freak and take five hundred pictures of this random guys car but.#what are the fucking odds. like seriously. again it was like. fully british imported here to the US. right hand driving and everything.#i .oi got to work on it. I saw it in the parking lot and blitzed for the fucking work orderss once i finished mine.#It came in for an oil change heuauaihehaiahahhahahahahahahausgahaha #i mean it wssnt an oil LEAK just a typical oil change but. fuck.#so british so so british the. the caps on the air valves on the wheel were little UK flags.ni.#i wanted to pull it into the bay but i was like. no. nay. i dont want to fuck up this guys car. only manual I've ever driven was a tracktor.#and that was like. ages ago.#I dont know. im sure there's a rent a car service in England.#Same model make same. everything. four doors. stupif. back area that sorta has seats but sorta not. fuck.#what are the odds. here. british car. in this specific shop. and. green. and same evetything and.#i accidentally locked the stearing wheel trying to start it so that was fun but we good we good.#me. me got to work on it. i honeslty have a conxerning amount i could go on about all of this.#Fucking. deppression gone. obliterated. non-existant. i dont gaf about anything possiblh upsetting anymore.#everytihng is sunshine right now and rainbows and flowers and sparkles.#and no other work orders came in while i was working on it thank goodness so i could dwaddle a little bit. oooohohhhhh #surprise husband jumpscare or some shite what the ever loving fucking hell.#tried not to be a freak about the entire thing but videos and games never did being in it justice of course.#proper. persectiv of not being through a camera lense and.#everything is good my heart is full i sorta could cry right now if something pushed me over the edge but good tears.#im so just. i have so mang feelings for him that it is like. an overwhelming amount. love him so much it is spilling out of my heart.#i dont know. universe came by to say hello. hi.#this is insane everyone is insane everyone is just nuts. everything is good so good right now.#stress has practically melted away everything is good. peaceful. okay. and it's not even my Friday.#My friday is tomotrow but man. ooohhhhh i needed this.#“Axlerod could fix me” not what i MEANT but oksy that too thst also works go for it.#sorry not to go over it again but i cant stress it wnough just. what are the odds. seriously.

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crazy-hazy-sims · 20 days ago

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I put my curly hair up in a half up half down waterfall style as opposed to my everyday style of putting all my hair up in a claw clip and i feel so pretty omg i genuinely looked in the mirror and thought "okay beautiful 😍"

#sigh sometimes my desire to have easy steps for everything in my life so I don't overwhelm my self by thinking about everything too much #keeps me form so much #anyway im gonna figure out a bunch of hairstyles this week so i can alternate between them whenever i feel like it!

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