#overphilosophize

[moonstaar]

If I bite your poison apple, will you wake me up?

[withered-rose-unbreakable-lotus]

By the way if you saw the shitty post Agato of GERTENA made and you've been around my blog for a while and wonder, yes I give up. Cause it's not the first stupid thing he's said the past 3 years and after 12 years his fan, I'm done. When I came across Tokami he was laid back, determined, there was a reason Tokami went so well after he joined them and became one of the biggest bands of Starwave Records. But lately he's been very dark, he calls himself a drinker proudly and he has a very passive aggressive attitude that I don't get sometimes and wonder if he's even sober when he says that shit. He's like an angsty teen with his fingers up against the world in my head rn.

Unlike other girls who went to his post bashing his appearance in return to his fatphobic post, I stated how being fat has nothing to do with laziness. I don't think he's ugly or talentless and I wouldn't attack that for his being brainwashed by his society to think being skinny is the only healthy option and anyone who doesn't abide by that law is a lazy loser. However, I won't stand for this bullshit or take his side. I've been called out before by someone here for taking sb else's side, who'd actually broken the law. But that law didn't harm anyone's life so I still don't care and follow that dude. Being hateful though and openly judge people for their appearance especially when you are a person of influence? Fuck that.

I am disappointed. Cause he really loves music. He's done so much to stay in the scene and after so long I'd hoped he's grown wiser. He's smart but somehow those brains ended up overphilosophizing shit to the point of arrogance. At the end of the day, it's been a long time since he himself has been skinny so I know that his attitude was big time projecting and rage baiting. But he got 22 likes or sth so his Japanese fangirlies don't mind that attitude cause they too agree being fat means you don't work and just stay at your mom's basement watching anime.

Anyway. I just wanted to make that clear in case you guys find photos of his in my blog (which I won't delete either cause I like keeping stuff from my past). I loved the dude, he played a big role in my life and inspiration to keep going with everything I did and for this I'm grateful. But even though I'm still miserable, I seem to have outgrown him. I too am sad bruh...but I won't go around judging people by their looks or the other thing he did that everyone seemed to approve back then cause a) the convo happened in Japanese so the foreign fans missed it and b) cause mental illness is another thing looked down upon in Japan (as if he or his fans are normal but anyway).

Good luck at the live abroad. Good luck in life. And I hope one day you'll wake up and realize you should be a little kinder after all the times you could come back to fight for your dream and having people wait for you. Not many jrockers can make it back. And you did 2-3 times. And I was one of those waiting. I waited the first time and each one after it. Whatever dude. You got a lot of healing to do.

[donkeysyears]

sometimes the morning after an overphilosophized night is worse than hangover