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₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁ mini pac 。⋆。 ゚
˖ ݁random things about your next lover ౨ৎ ˚
this is a small light hearted pick a pile reading, made for fun. there's a good mix of random, quirky, and deep stuff in each pile. so yeah, pick one and take what resonates or take it as a sign if it makes sense to you. {this reading is written in a non-hetero centric way}
dividers by @cafekitsune & @jimzittos images found in @saizun 's blog.
pile one pile two pile three
pile four pile five pile six
.‧͙˚ *༓ scroll down for the readings ⋆ִ ‧͙⁺˚
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masterpost ✶ pac readings ✶ ko-fi page
⋆bookings for personal readings are open ཐིཋྀ ˚₊‧⁺
˚˖𓍢ִ✧˚𝒑𝒊𝒍𝒆 𝒏𝒖𝒎𝒃𝒆𝒓 𝒐𝒏𝒆.⋆༘˚⋆
They have way too many hobbies, and they’re all kinda niche but related to creativity.
Very playful with almost everything, quirky or bizarre sense of humor.
Always looking for new things to do, seeks enjoyment and/or entertainment.
Humble, they don’t like bragging or being too loud about whatever they achieve.
They are open minded because being judgemental goes against their logic.
Amazing at teamwork.
Deep down they are actually quite structured and disciplined, despite giving off the opposite impression.
Unexpectedly responsible in their own way.
Very curious, wants to know everything about you.
Is quick to smell bullshit. Impossible for them to be lied to.
˚˖𓍢ִ✧˚𝒑𝒊𝒍𝒆 𝒏𝒖𝒎𝒃𝒆𝒓 𝒕𝒘𝒐.⋆༘˚⋆
They love anything that has a darker, spooky, mysterious tone. But they are quite chill about it actually, they love scary things but they are not annoying about it.
Easily misunderstood and badly judged by others tho.
They try really hard to be good at communicating with others despite being kinda shy and almost awkward.
Always overthinking and over analyzing.
They are nerdy, but in a history or philosophy way. Probably unable to do math.
Amazing emotional intelligence, especially when it comes to dealing with difficult moments from their past.
Worried about the future: they are not too concerned about traditional success, but they are concerned about leaving some sort of impact in the world, no matter how small.
˚˖𓍢ִ✧˚𝒑𝒊𝒍𝒆 𝒏𝒖𝒎𝒃𝒆𝒓 𝒕𝒉𝒓𝒆𝒆.⋆༘˚⋆
Hardworking, dedicated, passionate… maybe a workaholic.
Actually quite handy and always willing to help or solve anything.
They love their routines, they swear by them.
If they love you, after you ask them “what's going on?” they won’t reply “nothing”, they will go on about an overly specific topic that they were reminded of by something random.
Charismatic, but in a pretty eccentric way.
Black cat looks, yellow cat personality.
They are attractive because they are truly confident in themselves, and maybe quite uninterested in looking exactly like the conventional beauty ideals.
Detail oriented, borderline obsessive.
They are always doing something, always on the go, always close to burn out… because the moment they chill they accidentally begin feeling unmotivated.
. ˚˖𓍢ִ✧˚𝒑𝒊𝒍𝒆 𝒏𝒖𝒎𝒃𝒆𝒓 𝒇𝒐𝒖𝒓.⋆༘˚⋆
Party animal but in a golden retriever way.
So friendly and nice it's almost scary. But in reality they really enjoy meeting people, hanging out, and chatting.
Also, quite altruistic and willing to help out anyone with anything, they don’t care who or why.
They have a lot of friends, and acquaintances, but they have a very small inner circle who they are extremely loyal to.
Very strong sense of hope for the future. They never lose the conviction that everything will eventually turn out just fine.
Their will is sometimes too strong, they don’t let anything go easily.
Either on the spotlight or in a leadership position most times. They don’t look for it, it just happens.
Sometimes overly protective, but they have quirky ways of showing that.
Not good at flirting, they're quite dorky about it, but somehow it works for them
˚˖𓍢ִ✧˚𝒑𝒊𝒍𝒆 𝒏𝒖𝒎𝒃𝒆𝒓 𝒇𝒊𝒗𝒆.⋆༘˚⋆
HOT as fuck. As in sensual and captivating.
Highly perceptive about the people around them, they like to wonder how the mind works.
They might look off standish, cold or uninterested, and yes, they might be most times but that doesn't make them bad people.
In reality they are trying to look cool while being shy and afraid of intimacy.
Highly intuitive.
Many times their expectations for themselves are insane, but their expectations for others are low.
Probably super into classic literature. Dante's Inferno specifically.
Quite romantic, but also kinda pretentious about it. Don't expect average gifs, expect something that is a reference to an obscure experimental new wave french film or something.
They don't joke about their spotify playlists.
. ˚˖𓍢ִ✧˚𝒑𝒊𝒍𝒆 𝒏𝒖𝒎𝒃𝒆𝒓 𝒔𝒊𝒙.⋆༘˚⋆
Highly sensitive and creative but in a Lana del Rey kind of way.
They really have a sort of "old soul" vibe.
Too empathetic for their own good, but they are always working on it.
Staying at home is their favourite thing to do, specially if there's sweets involved.
Incredibly patient. They actually prefer slow-paced everything. Books, movies, shows, hobbies, everything.
Probably into crafty hobbies and podcasts.
They have a very low social battery, but they are always willing to put the effort if it is because of someone they appreciate.
Very proud of their roots and overall life journey.
Not very talkative, unless they have something they deem important and necessary to share.
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⁺‧₊˚ ཐི⋆ available for personal readings ⋆ཋྀ ˚₊‧⁺
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I'll wait for your love - 18+
See part 1 | See Part 2 | Part 3 of We can't be friends (wait for your love)
The only thing you’re sure of is that you don’t want things to go back to the way they were and Spencer agrees that change may be for the best.
Spencer Reid X Fem! Reader
DISCLAIMER This story is NSFW and contains graphic depictions + detailed descriptions of adult content. It is intended for mature audiences only, minors do not interact! You are responsible for the content you consume. Make sure to read all necessary warnings. Please remember this is a work of fiction; if you don’t like it, don’t read.
WARNINGS: Panic attack mentioned, slight PTSD depictions, case details (barely) mentioned, alcohol mentioned like once. Smut (not the focus at all): making out, nipple play, clitoral stimulation, praise, use of pet names (angel, pretty girl, etc). Proceed at your own risk.
Word count: 10.4K See notes at end for authors note & spoilers.
Avoiding Spencer wasn’t overly difficult on the flight back to D.C. You weren’t entirely sure how to face him after he risked his life for you, so you just pretended to be asleep the whole time. You even took a separate jeep from the tarmac to avoid a car ride back with him, and almost made a clean getaway to your car in the parking lot when Hotch stopped you.
“I’m sorry to hold you back, but I do need the Anchorage report on my desk before tomorrow morning. It can’t be put off any longer.”
He looked extremely apologetic and you understood. You’re grateful he gave you as much time as he has. That’s how you ended up stuck at work til the later hours of the evening. Besides the few workaholics, security guards and janitors roaming around the corridors, the only other person there with you is Spencer, oddly. Even Hotch has gone home. You’ve spent more time stalking the doctor work through the pile of case files on his desk than you have writing in the one on yours. Only when you're caught do you look away.
“Everything okay?” The innocent curiosity in his big eyes further reddens the hot embarrassment in your cheeks.
“Fine.” You mutter, dipping your head back down to the open page.
You’re never going to get this damn file done if you can’t get him out of your head, and him being barely three feet away from you doesn’t help. It’s very difficult for you to get your words from pen to paper. Anchorage wasn’t haunting you like it did at first. It was a traumatic event, yes, but alone isn’t the cause of this…block. Obviously the reality that you’re leaving is starting to dawn on you. Somehow your mind has linked this case with your departure and finishing this report makes it more official than your actual resignation.
Plus, as much as you definitely hate Spencer, you do did care for him. The shock of him almost getting himself killed in front of you is another thing occupying your mind. It’s barely been twenty four hours since then, it’s still fresh. You can see him stand and grab his satchel in your peripheral vision, he’s preparing to leave. There are a lot of memories attached to that brown leather bag.
Things he would carry in there for you when you forgot your own bag.
You don’t make it obvious that you’re watching him gather his things in small glances.
He bought extra hair clips for you to keep in there because you would often forget those too.
It’s over now. No point in dwelling on it. You shake your head once he’s out of sight, trying to force him out of your thoughts. Now that he’s gone you’re hoping to actually be able to get some work done.
He taught you chess with the mini chess set he keeps in there. You discovered that you actually quite liked chess and would ask to play with him all the time. It was also his ‘secret’ weapon to help you calm down.
You roll your eyes to push back the tears from the memories that refuse to stop playing. This can wait until you get home, it’s not important.
It wasn’t the chess set that helped you feel calm. Spencer could win chess against you in just a few moves, but he would deliberately stretch out the game so you could have room to breathe. The longer the game, the more time you had to spend focused on the moves and slow down your thoughts. You could open up at your own pace. He would let you feel in control.
It doesn’t matter if he’s near you or not, Spencer has a way of invading your headspace wherever he is. Your train of thoughts is interrupted with a light thud on your right. You covertly roll the tears away again and turn to examine the source of the noise. A mug of coffee placed on your desk by
“Spencer?” You sputter breathlessly.
“Sorry. I know you told me to stop. This is the last time I promise.”
You don’t fully comprehend what he’s going on about, not expecting him to be here at all.
“I thought you left.”
“I did– was. I was leaving, but I thought I’d make you some coffee before I go. Since you’ve been here a while.” He awkwardly explains.
You steadily direct your attention back to the mug, reeling in what was happening.
“Before you get mad, this really is just a cup of coffee from a colleague who thought it might help keep you energised if you’re planning to stay late. There’s no ulterior motive…”
He continues rambling but you’re not mentally present to hear any of it.
He made you coffee.
Even though you’ve been nothing short of an absolute bitch. Granted he was a bitch first, but the point is that he’s still thinking of your well being regardless. You can’t hide your tears from him this time. It’s the soft buzz of your name that draws you back to him.
“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to upset you! I’ll take the coffee–”
His panicked sentiment is cut short when you jump out of your seat and shove past him. The breakdown you’ve been avoiding hits you like a ton of bricks. You run into the nearest empty office and he runs after you, making it past the door before you can lock him out.
“Spencer p–please get out! I’m fine.” You’re pacing in the same spot, fanning away the stream falling down your cheeks, hyperventilating.
He doesn’t respond to you, instead cautiously taking your hand in his. You’re in too frenzied a state to care. He guides you to sit on the couch against the wall and you blindly go along with it, still trying to get yourself together.
You want to stop the tears, but you can’t do that until you get your breathing under control. He slowly wraps his arms around you and you slump into him, head buried in his chest. You should try to fight it, you should push him away, but you can’t. Right now, surrounded by his scent, held in his arms, you don’t want to move. It’s not something you can properly explain, but the feeling is so comforting that nothing else matters. All you know is that you’re safe and that’s enough for you to allow yourself to finally break down.
The first few sobs are loud, like there’s not enough air in the world to stabilise your lungs. They fizzle out into silent whimpers and you grasp onto the fabric of his sweater, balling it in your fist, just letting yourself feel. Spencer still hasn’t said a word. His right hand is rubbing circles on your back and his left hand is gently scratching just above the nape of your neck.
You stay like that for a while, even after you’ve stopped crying. It’s been so long since you’ve been in this little bubble with him and you don’t want it to end. You pull away when you feel the strap of his satchel across his stomach as your hand drops to his lap. He visually follows every move you make.
“You’re still wearing your bag.” You sniffle, leaning back.
“I am.” He whispers, understanding that you no longer want to be touched.
He stays in his original position; facing you, but now with one arm resting on top of the backrest and the other idly in his lap. You’ve moved so that now you're facing ahead with your back leaning against the cushions, pulling your knees into your chest. You had never found comfort in silence until the first time you experienced it with Spencer. Staying huddled, you divert your eyes towards him. There’s a distinct wet patch on his shirt. It’s less visible on his sweater-vest, but it’s there.
“Your shirt’s wet now.” It’s almost impossible to make out what you’re saying with your mouth muffled against your arm, but of course, Spencer manages anyway.
“It’ll dry.” He smiles, tone delicate.
“But– germs.” You choke a little due to your previous crying.
“It can be washed.” He’s using his comforting voice again.
“I’m sorry.”
“Don’t be.”
The silence resumes. Neither of you dares to move, trying to freeze this moment. It’s obvious that you didn’t grasp how badly you craved each other’s presence.
“D–do…” The initial sound grabs Spencer’s full attention again. You take a deep breath, hoping he wants to stay here as much as you do. “Do you still carry that little chess set with you?”
A small, airy chuckle comes out from him.
“Would you like to play?”
“Please.”
He creates some more space between you and begins to set up the board once he’s pulled it out of his satchel. You move to accommodate the set up, now facing him with your legs crossed on the couch and shoes abandoned on the floor. You wait for him to make the first move. After the opening moves the game doesn’t seem to get any harder and you know he’s throwing the game. You’re okay at chess, but he’s obviously a lot better.
“You’re going easy on me.” You mumble.
“Because you’re not even trying.” He replies blithely.
“Why are you doing this?”
“Like I said, you’re making it too easy.” He gently teases.
“Not that. Helping me. You hate me, remember?” You say it like it’s the most casual thing in the world.
“I don’t hate you.”
“You literally told me that you hate me.” You chuckle, numb to the hurt that sentence once brought you.
“So did you.” He counters in defence, trailing your hand as it carelessly moves your queen to her demise.
“I was angry.”
“So was I.” He spared your queen, in turn leaving his king vulnerable.
“It doesn’t matter now…” You don’t finish the rest of your sentence but Spencer still hears it.
You’re leaving soon anyway.
“It matters to me.” If he left something unsaid you choose to ignore it.
“You’re letting me win.” You whisper, feeling the urge to cry some more, but there’s no tears left.
He doesn’t make a move, bringing the game to a halt. He’s waiting for you to meet his eyes. You know what he’s going to say.
“Spencer, don't.” You beseech.
“Why?” If you looked at him instead of the board you’d see the way his eyes are pleading at you.
“There’s no point.” This time it’s your voice that cracks.
You're looking everywhere else and it makes you too aware of your surroundings. Like how the couch is lined up directly under a window that anyone could peek into.
“Leaving is not the only option.” He solicits.
He regards your discomfort and closes the blinds from where he’s sitting, pulling you back into the privacy of your bubble.
“There’s nothing that you can say to make things go back to how they were.” You bite the inside of your cheek, fiddling with a random pawn.
It’s not a proper two way conversation. You’re talking to yourself just as much as Spencer’s talking to you. You’re both trying to convince you of what you’re saying.
“Things don’t have to go back to how they were.” The squeaks in his soothing tone are starting to melt any resolve you have left.
“There’s no reason for me to stay.” You oppose, trying to make any argument stick.
“I can think of more reasons for you to stay than for you to go.”
There’s an underlying tension bubbling. Neither of you notice it over your desperate tug of war.
“I don’t think there’s anything that you can say to get me to stay.” Another baseless sentence meant more for you than for him.
“Give me one chance. One chance to convince you.” He can see your internal struggle at his request and he throws out one final plea to sway you. “For nothing more than closure.”
Closure.
You’ve spent months in turmoil over the hows and the what ifs, trying to conjure answers to questions that wouldn’t stop pestering you. You couldn’t turn him down even if you wanted to.
“Closure?” You repeat, eyes finally latching onto his.
“Closure.” He whispers back in reassurance.
“Even if you can’t convince me?” You caution, not wanting to give him false hope.
He doesn’t say anything, thinking over the scenario in his head. He simply nods and you mimic the action, blinking away the blur in your vision and dragging around chess pieces. It takes Spencer a second to figure out that you were moving them back to their default places.
“Okay new game.” You announce.
Spencer blinks in confusion, waiting for you to elaborate.
“I can ask you any question I want and you have to answer honestly. If by the end of the game I’m not convinced to stay, you back off for the remainder of my time here.” You pause for him to interject, but he doesn’t. “That means we stay away from each other, only talking when needed for work. Even then as cordially and professionally as possible. No more trying to make casual conversation or bringing me coffee or anything like that.”
“Till the end of the game?” He studies you.
“Yup.” You smack your lips together. “Til one of us checkmates the other.”
“This means you’ll actually give me a fair shot?”
“Between the two of us, I’m not the one known for cheating at games.” You jab, trying to ease the tension you could definitely feel now.
“I meant a fair shot at convincing you. As in you’ll seriously take what I have to say into account.” He discards your attempt.
“No, I know. The opportunity was just too good to pass up.”
He can tell you’re trying to hold back a laugh from the small smile on your lips. It’s as adorable to him now as it was the first time he saw it.
“Any rules before we start?” He asks, unable to hide his own smile.
“Only that we have to be honest.” You answer, immediately dropping your smile.
“Okay.” He agrees, smiling slightly wider.
“Okay.” You nod again.
When he finally makes the first move it hits you that you don’t actually know where to start. Theoretically, you know what you want to ask, but don’t know how to ask. You don’t know if you should jump straight into the questions or start with some ice breakers. Nothing is said for about four to five moves when Spencer pauses the game.
“Are you going to ask any questions or have you decided that you just want to play one last game for your closure?”
“Huh?” You snap your vision away from the board. “Oh, sorry. I was thinking.”
“Do you want to return to the game after thinking of a few questions to ask?” He raises his brow and relaxes his jaw.
“No, no, we don’t need to do that. Let’s keep playing, the questions will come to me.” You brush off his suggestion and motion for him to continue with his turn. He doesn’t.
“What?” Your voice raises and you scrunch your nose from perplexity.
“Sorry, it’s just that you’ve put us on a time limit and this is how you’re using our time?” He airs, failing to conceal his amusement.
“Well excuse me if I don’t exactly have a list of questions ready to go for you.” You narrow your eyes in annoyance.
“Why would you suggest this if you don’t have any questions?” He tries to hold back his laugh and ends up snorting as a result.
“I have questions!” You jabber, unable to maintain your annoyance. “I don’t know what– where do I even start?”
“Start with whichever one comes to you first.” He shrugs, finally making his move.
A lot of things come to mind when you think about it. The thing that screams the loudest twitches a nerve and you become instantly irate.
“Okay.” You nod, tone harsh and flat. “Let’s start with whatever the fuck possessed you on the last case. What was your thought process when you put your life in danger like that?”
He almost gets whiplash from the change in mood, his face literally reads ‘are you serious?’.
“He was going to shoot you.” He states like it’s the most obvious thing in the world.
“I was wearing a vest, I would’ve been fine.” You contend.
“I wasn’t willing to take that risk.”
“Risk?! You literally put yourself in danger for no reason!”
“I think it was a pretty good reason actually!”
“Spencer that was–” You stop yourself with a grumble, inhaling deeply.
“It was instinctual, okay?” He softly explains. “I saw him aim the gun at you and I just reacted.”
“Well it was a stupid reaction!” You whine.
“I’m not going to apologise for it.”
The glare you give is piercing, you bite the inside of your cheek to hold your tongue before you say something you can’t take back. Spencer throws his head back and sighs.
“But I will promise not to do it again.” He adds, not fully intending to keep it.
This was slowly turning into another argument, both of you shooting back too fast with your responses. You aren’t in the mood for another argument. So you redirect your attention to the game.
“Check.” You mumble, buying yourself time to think of another question. “Why are you here so late anyway?”
“I wanted to finish some work before tomorrow morning.” He replies, moving his king to safety.
“Yeah, what’s up with that? You could’ve done those tomorrow as well.” Your voice softens out of curiosity.
“I wanted to get them finished in case there were more tomorrow.” It’s not his best excuse. You don’t know what he means by that. He doesn’t know what he means by that. He’s lying to you.
You scoff, poking your tongue against your cheek. “Wow. You really can’t not cheat during a game, can you?”
“Right, sorry.” Spencer clears his throat after the initial confusion clears. Complete honesty, it was your only rule. “I wanted to be here.”
“For…” You egg on, purposely rolling your ‘r’s to prompt him.
“I wanted to make sure that you were okay.” He admits, looking away from you.
“Why?” You’re genuinely puzzled at the admission. “You’re the one who almost died. I mean, it was stupid and your fault, but still. If anything I should be checking up on you.”
“Check.” That’s the only response he gives you. He hopes that you don’t push further, but he knows that you will.
His lack of response only forces you to think about the possible reasons by yourself, using context clues to figure it out. You are a profiler, after all.
“Is this because of the panic attack?” You note how his jaw twitches when he swallows at the mention. “It is! You seriously chose to spend your night stuck at the office because of that?”
“What else was I supposed to do? It’s not like you would talk to me, you literally refused to even look at me!” He gripes.
“Spencer I think anyone would panic if they got tackled to the ground by a six foot man without warning. I’m fine.” You giggle.
“What happened to complete honesty?” It’s his turn to glare at you.
“I am being honest!” You protest.
“Lying by omission is not being honest.” He rolls his eyes.
“Okay Mr. know-it-all, what am I lying about?” You challenge.
“Seriously? You don’t remember?” His approach is doubtful and he just stares at your dazed expression.
“Fucking spit it out already, Spence!”
Any sarcasm he had geared up for a response dissipates at your use of his nickname. He’s heard it plenty in the last few months, but not from you. For a moment things feel like they never changed. It stings in a bittersweet kind of way.
“You sc–screamed– uh–” He clears his throat and rapidly blinks, his nose twitches in the process. “During that panic attack, you repeatedly asked me to stay with you. Y–you, uh– you said you didn’t think you could li–”
“Stop. Stop. Stop talking.” Your voice quavers and you hold your hand up, ears burning up. “I don’t wanna know.”
You don’t know why it makes your heart race the way it does, you don’t even remember it. He waits a while before speaking up again, wanting to be careful about how he goes about the topic without you shutting down.
“May I ask you a question?” He voices professionally, trying to make the conversation less personal so you don’t feel cornered.
You nod, moving your king out of check.
“Is there anybody you will talk to about Anchorage? Without pushing them away?” He keeps the game going as he speaks to provide you with a distraction.
“Woah– Anchorage? Where is that coming from?” You titter.
“I want you to remember that we promised to be honest and I won’t push if you ask me to stop, but I know for a fact that you aren’t okay.” He waits for you to stop him but you don’t, even though you know roughly what he’s going to say. “Panic attacks aside, your avoidant behaviour around the topic, inability to focus, being easily startled, you’re showing signs of PTSD.”
“Spence, c’mon. I don’t need to talk to anyone. I already passed the psych evals.” You attempt to make light of the situation with carefully chosen words so you’re not lying. It was a futile attempt, you know he’s not willing to budge when he doesn’t give you anything more than a blank stare.
“Why does this matter so much to you?” You sigh in defeat. “Whatever happened…that’s a part of the job, you know that.”
“I also know, first hand, that it takes over your life. You can’t run from it, no matter how much you try to.” His tone is soft as he speaks, yet you feel like he’s accusing you.
“I am not running! Why would you say I’m running?” You object with a high voice, shrugging your shoulders. “And it’s not taking over my life. Also, check.”
“Because that’s what you do when you don’t want to deal with something.” He states point blank.
“Woah– so– that was entirely unnecessary.” You stammer, unable to deny it.
“I’m not criticising you. I just happen to know you and I know that you have a tendency to run from your problems. And it is taking over your life.”
“You’re profiling!” You gasp.
“You know that it’s not something we can just turn off! No matter how much we pretend like we can.” He waves his hands defensively.
You can’t argue with that, your lips twisting to the side.
“You want me to be honest?” You murmur sheepishly.
“Always. Please.” He responds gently, wanting you to be as comfortable as possible.
“I don’t want to talk about it. I spend a good chunk of my day actively avoiding thinking about it, but somehow I always end up thinking about it anyway. At times it’s like I can almost feel…” You breathe in instinctively. “This is the first time in months I’ve been able to do anything without it lingering in the back of my mind. Can we please talk about it another time? I would rather talk about other things…”
Another time.
“...right now.”
You’ve implied that there will be another time to talk and he definitely caught it, even if he pretends that he hasn’t. You don’t even know if what you said is true, you got too comfortable with the familiarity of his friendship. It was something you said out of habit from back when you two actually were friends. Not even a full hour's worth of conversation with him and he’s already worming his way back in.
“Um–” You drag yourself further back on the couch, creating more physical distance.
“That’s okay. We don’t have to talk about it at all.” Spencer senses your urgency to leave the situation and jumps into damage control. “It’s your turn.”
“No, um, I should– I should go. Thanks for doing thi– helping me.” You turn away from him, aiming for your shoes and ready to bolt.
“The game’s not over.” He points out.
“Yes it is.” You declare, still in the process of putting on your shoes.
“You said til checkmate.” He huffs, shifting out of his seated position.
“I forfeit!” You throw your arms out in a shrugging manner, standing up after him.
“I can’t believe this. You’re going back on your word!” He doesn’t even raise his voice. He’s just hurt.
“What’s the point, Spencer? Closure doesn’t mean anything, I’m still leaving! You can’t magically change my mind!” You yell, getting louder with each sentence.
“I disagree. I think that you’re running again!” He blocks your way and yells back, maintaining his volume throughout.
“Maybe you should think less!” You suggest, still yelling. Sarcasm is your defence mechanism when you have no actual defence.
“You know what else I think?” He continues, emphasising the word ‘think’ every time he says it out of spite. “I think that you agreed to this thinking I won’t be able to convince you, but I am!”
“I don’t care what you–”
“I think you don’t want to finish the game that you started, because you’re afraid to ask the harder questions!”
“Stop.” You command, but it doesn’t deter him.
“I think that you’re scared to hear my answers because then it all becomes too real for you–”
“Stop!” The words almost get stuck in your throat, but you choke them out. “You’re wrong.”
“If I’m wrong then prove it. To both of us.” He sits back down and motions to the board. “Ask the real questions.”
“I don’t need to prove anything, you’re wrong.” You uphold.
“So leave.” He challenges, knowing that you won’t be able to.
If you truly believed that he’s wrong you wouldn’t feel the need to prove it, but you do and he knows that. You walk back over to the couch, head nodding from irritation, tongue poking your cheek. You kick your shoes off with a bit of force and return to your earlier position across from him.
“Your move.” He reminds you as you settle in.
You don’t reply yet, but move your rook to set him up for the next move.
“Check.” He smugly states.
“Who was she?”
You don’t move, examining him close for any change in his behaviour. He obviously didn't anticipate that question first, snapping his sights back on you.
“Sorry?”
“The woman who greeted me at your door. That night at your apartment.”
“Charlotte.” He replies, holding your gaze to show you he’s got nothing to hide. “We met at the library a week before.”
“Are you guys together?” You break away first, diverting your eyes to the chess board and trying to seem unfazed when moving your knight.
“No, God, no.” He denies immediately.
“I don’t know, she seemed pretty cosy for someone you met a week prior.” You don’t mean to sound as snide as you come across.
“No, it wasn’t like that at all.” He shakes his head.
“You sure? Because I’m pretty sure I saw her mark you up with a kiss on your cheek before disappearing.” You don’t look at him, examining a captured pawn as you wait for him to make his move.
“Mark me up?” He cognizes it instantly. “Are you…jealous?”
“What? No!” You vehemently deny, your voice rising in several pitches.
“You are!” His eyes widen.
“I am not jealous.”
His jaw slacks and he lets out an amused scoff. He doesn’t say anything, making you feel the need to fill the silence.
“I only bring it up because…I know you have a thing with…germs.” Your words falter because of your own uncertainty and you want to dissolve into the fucking floor.
Spencer tries to suppress a smile by poking his tongue out slightly. If the atmosphere was lighter he’d tease you about it, but he doesn’t want to make you take off again. Still, he feels the need to clarify the events of the night.
“I don’t know why she kissed my cheek, it was completely random.” He takes his time saying it, still fighting a smile.
You swallow nervously and purse your lips to the side in response. One question answered and you only have new ones in its place. Did she stay the night? Did she sleep on the couch or on his bed? Did he see her again?
“I drove her home right after you left.” He can almost hear your thoughts.
“Was it a date?” You softly gulp again, unsure if you even have a right to know.
“Yes.” He hesitates.
“Oh.”
“I wanted to try out casual dating for once.” He chagrins. “I honestly don’t know how you did it, it’s not even fun.”
“No it’s not.” You chuckle dryly. “So no second date, I presume?”
“Definitely not. I was just stressed the whole time.” He chuckles with you.
“Take a shot of tequila before you go next time, it helps settle the nerves.” You joke, jumping to give him advice you hope he doesn’t take. You can’t help it, it’s what you’ve always done. Even if it goes against what you desire.
“While moderate consumption of tequila can help relax the nervous system, I will not be turning to alcohol for stress relief.”
“Then blast classical music while you get ready and give yourself a pep talk out loud, it’s actually really efficient–”
“There won’t be a next time. For a really long time, if ever.” He interjects, miffed at your insistence.
“You willingly plan on committing to lifelong celibacy?” You exclaim with a puzzled look. “Why?!”
Spencer laughs at how raw your reaction is. He didn’t plan on giving out any more details but, with that prompt he decides that it’s now or never.
“I don’t think any future dates will appreciate me picturing someone else in their place the whole time.”
Oh.
Both of you lock eyes at the same time. This is not a road you’re prepared to go back down, even if that’s literally the whole point of this conversation. You’re too stunned to reply and Spencer uses this as an opportunity to be elaborate. He doesn’t want any misunderstandings this time.
“I couldn’t stop pictur–”
“Shut up.” You blurt out the sentence in almost one word.
Your heart’s racing like you’re standing on the edge of a cliff. You’re flustered, every part of your body is heated from how terrified you are.
“Y–you don’t have t–t…you don’t owe m–me an explanation.” You try to elaborate, contradicting yourself and stumbling on your words.
“I want to.” He reads that you’re apprehensive but pushes regardless.
“Please don’t.” The tears that you thought had dried out were building again.
“Why ask if you won’t let me answer?”
You don’t have anything to say to that. Did you want answers? Yes. Still, you didn’t expect how hard they’d be to hear. He whispers your name and you scramble to think of your next move, and not in chess. You’re unable to even think about the game right now. You want to bolt, but you can’t even get yourself to move. So you deflect.
“Because it doesn’t matter.”
“I disagree.” Although his tone is subdued, the pace of his wording is faster. “I think it does matter and that’s why you’re afraid to hear it.”
He’s right but you can’t bring yourself to agree. This is only going to over-complicate an already complicated situation.
“It’s not enough.” Your voice cracks.
“How can it be if you won’t even give it a fair shot?”
“Fair?”
It comes out louder than you intended. His words trigger resentment within you and you snap.
“Nothing about any of this is fair! I mean, fucking hell, Spencer, four years. That’s how long we’ve been friends. I mean I’ve shared shit that I thought I would be taking to the fucking grave with you! You were my best friend for four fucking years and all it took was like, five seconds?”
You sob, softer than when you were first crying, but the frustration is clear. He reaches out to touch your hand, but you push his hand away.
“No!” You choke, sobbing harder when you try to compile your thoughts. “Five seconds to destroy all of it! It makes me wonder if everything we shared, our friendship, was it ever even that strong?”
Your anger simmers to sadness, as evident with how your yelling fades into whispering in the last sentence.
“I can’t even tell you when exactly those five seconds were. I mean, I know…but…I don’t. Where did it go wrong, Spence?”
“I don’t know.” Is all he can say after a beat of silence.
He knows exactly where it went wrong.
“Yeah, me neither!” You sniffle, immediately wiping a single tear that manages to escape. “So again, it doesn’t matter.”
“When you took it back.”
“What?”
“That’s where everything changed for me. You showed up at my apartment drunk, after your date with Nathan. Your exact words were ‘I mean as an amazing friend’.” His voice strains like he’s forcing himself to speak.
Your gaze falls, eyes darting everywhere as you try to jog your memory beyond the one sentence you remember.
“I don’t understand.” You croak.
“You know, if I wasn’t who I am, maybe you could love me the way I love you.” He chuckles bitterly, fighting back tears of his own. “That was– that was, uh, what you said before you took it back.”
“Spence, please…” You whine without sound, tilting your head back and chewing on your lip as a final attempt to stay composed.
“No, you wanted to know where it went wrong.” He laughs falsely to downplay his tears. “You can say it doesn’t matter all you want, but the fact is, it does matter. It matters to me and I won’t let you run from it anymore.”
You can’t look at him. Not with tears free falling down your face. You cup your hands together in your lap, pressing your fingers and nails together.
“You told me that I couldn’t love you.” You struggle to sound your words.
“I’m an idiot.” Another chuckle, but he sounds defeated. “When you said that, all I could think about was how badly I wanted to say that I do love you.”
You tearfully laugh at this admission.
“I only took it back because of what you said. I panicked. I thought I’d ruined things…which I guess, I still did.” Another laugh from you.
Spencer responds with the same regretful sound.
The irony spurs another fit of giggles amongst you, this one slightly longer and infinitely more rueful than the last. You look anywhere but at each other until it grows quieter.
“If you loved me, why the fuck would you tell me that I couldn’t love you?” You sound just as, if not more, defeated than him.
“Love.” Spencer corrects without missing a beat.
Your brows twitch up and your heart jumps.
“I was so hung up on every single part of your sentence that I didn’t know what to say first.” He proceeds to answer you without leaving much room to process what he said. “I wanted to tell you that I do love you. I love you as you are. Not as somebody else.”
“But you didn’t say any of that.” You ignore all his admissions, not fully comprehending.
“Like I said, I’m an idiot. I was in so much disbelief and that was the first thing that came out of my mouth.” He sullenly huffs.
You don’t reply, sniffling with your head down.
“For like a second, I had everything I wanted. Then you took it back and it was like my whole world had been ripped out from under me. In those five seconds, you’d given me a taste of what I’d spent four years convincing myself I couldn’t have and I just– I couldn’t go back after that.” He adds after a stillness.
After a short while, your focus shifts from your hands to the board in front of you. The game’s been long forgotten. You’re immersed in the conversation, in spite of how strenuous it is.
“I understand why you were distant, even mean, at first.” You snivel. “But after a while you just became downright cruel.”
Spencer doesn’t shy away from your gaze when you do look at him. His skin is as drenched from crying as yours is.
“I mean ‘I don’t want to see your face’? I know that I don’t really have a leg to stand on anymore, but, what the fuck Spencer?”
He doesn’t cringe any less with every reminder. He’s truly regretted the words since they left his mouth.
“I wanted to hurt you.” He reveals. “I thought you were being deliberately cruel and I wanted you to feel exactly how I was feeling.”
“Deliberately?”
He nods, hanging his head.
“I thought that you knew how I felt and were just trying to be funny or something.”
“Well I didn’t. I wasn’t.” You cut him off with a constricted voice.
“Even if you did, it’s not an excuse.” His eyes are glistening from the outpour of tears, but he still lifts his sights back to you. “I’m sorry.”
You don’t know how to acknowledge his apology at all. You’re not even angry anymore, all you feel is sorrow and regret for the way everything happened. An entire friendship down the drain due to an unfortunate set of circumstances.
“This is so fucked up.” You say with another mordant laugh. “All of this could have been avoided if we just talked about it.”
It stung less when you had somebody to blame for it. Your vision blurs and you make no effort to clear it, letting yourself cry openly.
“We’re talking about it now?” It’s almost a squeak, the way it’s spoken.
“Yeah, but,” your shoulders slump, defeatedly, and you have to pause to control your sob, “what good does it do now? I’ve already lost the best thing that’s ever happened to me in the most pathetic way possible.”
“I’m right here.” He counters in such a small voice that it gives your goosebumps.
“Spencer, too many things have been said…”
“When you first joined the team, I instantly knew I liked you.”
He chews on his lip and darts his eyes around while he contemplates if he wants to continue.
“I thought it was because of your kind nature. You were so sweet to everybody.” He decides he does, but his voice shakes throughout. “You have this gift…you make people feel so good about themselves. Whenever you spoke to me, I felt like the most important person in the world. It was impossible not to like you.”
You want to pretend like you don’t know where he’s going with this. You want to stop him, but your voice is stuck in your throat.
“It wasn’t until you bought me coffee for the first time that I realised just how much I liked you.” He chuckles again, as he reminisces in the memory. “You didn’t even get my order right until the fourth time, but it was still my favourite cup of the day.”
“You make me sound like a saint.” You finally choke out, attempting to play down the confession so it doesn’t crush your heart. “The only reason I even started bringing you coffee is because you learned how I like my coffee first.”
“Not a saint, an angel. I’ve fallen so deeply in love with you that there are times where it genuinely feels like I’m in the presence of an angel.”
It’s stated with such sincerity that it knocks the wind out of your pipes. Your eyes are widened and you’re biting your tongue with your mouth closed, staring at him with your chin tucked. He seems so confident, even with the glistening from previous tears in his eyes.
“I wanted to be in your life in any way you would have me. Even when it meant that I had to accept you with other people. And it was bearable, until…” His reminiscence only ends at the memory of the night that changed everything. “Like I said, I couldn’t go back.”
The last part fades into another whisper, only then do you find the courage to speak up.
“Exactly.” You stick to your denial. “It can’t go back to how it was before.”
Your heart is so sure of what it wants, but your head is blinded by fear. You’re at a crossroads, except one path, the path that leads to everything you long for, is clouded with a fog of uncertainty. The other path is so painfully clear, you can practically see what’s on the other side. A fresh start, where the risk of fucking up further doesn’t exist. What you don’t see is Spencer.
“Good. I don’t want it to go back to how it was.”
Spencer’s waiting for you to enter the fog. He’s going to be there holding your hand every step of the way.
“I’ve already handed in my resignation.”
“That matters less than everything you’ve claimed doesn’t matter.” He leans in, intensifying his eye contact.
“I’m pretty sure Hotch is really close to confirming my replacement.” You comment half-heartedly.
You’re trying anything to dissuade both him and yourself from acknowledging the obvious, but he doesn’t plan on letting you avoid it.
“I love you.” He whispers softly.
“Spencer…” You begin when he takes hold of your hands and whatever you had to say disappears from your tongue.
“I love you. With every atom that makes up my body.” He repeats himself with further elaboration to instil it in your mind.
“I’m scared.” You whisper back with a sob, finally accepting it.
“Why?” His voice can’t be any softer, but it still cracks a little.
“Because, you can’t guarantee that it’s going to end well.” You allow your vulnerability to peek through. “And that’s going to hurt more. I’d rather leave now than fall deeper.”
Although you didn’t say it back, it’s an indirect admission that you love him too. And it’s enough for him to fight harder.
“I know that my credibility isn’t the greatest,” he coaxes a small, sad scoff out of you, “but I truly believe that this, us, we’ll work. Because I know that I’m going to do everything I can to make this work.”
He feels bolder when you don’t pull away from his touch, folding your fingers into your palms and cupping over them. You observe the sight as it unfolds in lieu of a verbal response.
“I’ve spent four years judging any man that comes into your life, wishing I was in their place, swearing I would treat you better than all of them.”
Spencer feels the need to fill in the silence and he lets honesty guide his confession. He leans in further as if he’s indulging his deepest secret.
“Four years wasted wondering what could be, cursing out those idiots, but taking no action to make it happen. And that makes me the biggest idiot out of all of them.”
When he speaks like this, with his big, imploring eyes and prayerful tone, it melts your heart to a point where it almost hurts. The more he talks, the more you begin to lean in, opening yourself up to him.
“It took losing you to realise how badly I fucked up and for that I will never forgive myself. I know that I have no right to ask you to waste any more time on me…”
There’s no more resistance against the pull you both physically feel to each other.
“...but I’m begging you for a chance to do today what I should have done way before yesterday.”
Your faces grow closer by the second, you can feel each other's breaths against skin.
“And I’m going to spend every tomorrow proving what I said today.”
The likelihood of him changing your mind with one conversation wasn’t very high, both you and Spencer knew this when you got into it. You’re not entirely surprised when he somehow manages to overcome those odds too. You take the step to close the gap and lightly press your lips to his.
It starts off soft, there’s no lust, no ulterior motive behind it. It’s a simple confirmation that you’re both present and this is real. Spencer doesn’t shy away from the kiss, not that you’d call this a kiss. It feels more intimate, more unguarded.
Spencer pulls you onto his lap as he shifts and leans back against the backrest to allow more room for you. You wrap your arms around him and the kiss deepens. In the midst of you straddling him, he slides the entire chess board off the couch and the pieces scatter on the floor. It’s only when you feel that the kiss can’t bring you any closer to him does the lust emerge. It fuels a desire to prove that you both whole-heartedly belong to each other.
There’s no pinpointing when the switch happens. All you know is that the feeling of his lips against yours is no longer enough. You cup his jaw in your hands, swiping your tongue on his lower lip and it causes his grip on your waist to tighten. He parts his lips for you and it starts what you can only call a dance with your tongues.
Your breathing grows hotter, your hips subconsciously grind against him. There’s a prominent bulge that brushes against your heat and you whine into his mouth. Spencer grunts your name in response and then abruptly pulls away.
“Wait, wait, wait, slow down.” He breathlessly whispers against your lips.
“What?” You whisper back with concern. “What’s wrong?”
“Are you sure you want to do this?” He gazes into your eyes, afraid that you might regret this later.
“I’ve never been more sure, actually.” You’re confident at first but the look in his eyes makes you pull back further. “Unless…you’re not sure?”
“No, don’t misunderstand me. I want you.” His tone rises just above the previous whisper with his clarification. “It’s just that the last thing I want to do is take advantage of you when our emotions are running high.”
“Four years, Spencer.” You lean in again, just brushing your lips against his. “The only reason you should be making me wait is if you’re not sure.”
He shuts that idea down by crashing his lips on yours. The kiss is so hungry, so desperate, it’s everything both of you have longed for and denied yourselves everytime you’ve been in each other's presence. It doesn’t take long for hands to start to roam. He traces the curve from your waist to your hips, stopping just at the hem of your shirt, tugging it like he’s asking for permission.
You rush to undo your buttons and he meets you halfway, starting at the bottom. His fingers brush against yours as you two reach the final button and you pull the fabric off yourself. You do the same with his shirt, lips remaining locked, except for the small gasps of air you take in between. It requires a bit more manoeuvring with him, but you’re both soon shirtless.
His mouth travels to your jaw and you shut your eyes from pleasure as he continues down to your neck. The stubble on his chin tickles your skin. You cup it, gently pushing him away with a giggle.
“Forget to pack a razor in your bag, Dr. Reid?” Your voice is teasing, more playful than seductive.
He chuckles, airily, hiding his groan. He knows you’re being sarcastic, but the use of his title, with your voice in this context, catches him off guard. You moan as you feel his growing bulge against your heat when his arms tighten around your waist, pulling you into his kiss. You swiftly undo the clasp of your bra, but before you can take it off, Spencer grabs you from just below the hips and lifts you up off him, gently laying you down on the seat of the couch.
There’s no room for hesitation as his lips find your neck again and he nips at the skin. Every suckle earns him short gasps and the grip in his hair tightens as he travels lower. He stops just above your breast, pulling himself up to sit on his knees. You stare up at him with a heated gaze, the nail of your thumb resting between your teeth with your lips parted to make up for the loss of his lips.
He reaches for your bra strap and begins pulling slowly, searching your eyes for any signs of you withdrawing consent. All he sees is how beautifully they sparkle when you give him a light nod. It’s been too long since he’s seen the stars that you hold in your eyes, stars he accustomed himself to before he even got to properly know you.
Gazing into his eyes, you’ve never felt more sure, more safe. You trust him implicitly and you’ve never wanted anything more. His constant need to make sure you're comfortable sends shivers down to your core. He slides the garment off you and Spencer’s beyond grateful that he’s already on his knees, knowing that if he was standing he’d fall to them because of the sight below him.
His eyes don’t falter once, he’s trying to permanently etch this moment into his brain. He hovers his fingers above your body, thumb brushing against your hardened nipple and you softly whine. He looks awestruck, almost like he doesn’t believe what’s happening. You can’t help but wonder if he thinks your boobs look weird.
“Beautiful.” The words fall out of his mouth in a whisper, as if on cue. He’s really just thinking out loud.
Before you can respond he lowers down and plants a small peck to your sensitive nub before taking it into his mouth. You gasp again, head lolling back in pleasure. One of your hands goes for his hair, while the other clings to his hand that’s already holding yours. He switches between sucking, pulling and squeezing; rolling it between his tongue and uses his teeth to squeeze ever so slightly.
“S–spencer.” A strangled moan falls from your lips.
You tug his hair, whining and moaning as your hips roll against the strain in his pants. When your motions become continuous, he lets out his own strained groan and is forced to release your nipple with a small ‘pop’.
“Angel, I really need you to stop doing that.” He murmurs in your ear with a gentle, gravelly tone.
As soon as the nickname reaches your ears your hips involuntarily buck up again, making his hips automatically push down against yours. His cock presses against your core and you both moan, his head falling against your shoulder.
“Spence, more.” You quietly whine in against his ear. “I need more.”
“More?” He echoes back, turning his head so that your lips brush past each other when speaking.
“Mhm.” You nod weakly as he brushes a strand of hair out of your face and weakly connects his lips with yours.
Even when he’s got you vulnerable and at your most compromised, he’s still as gentle as ever. You don’t feel him undo your pants or sneak his hand in them, but you definitely feel him press the pads of his fingers against your clothed clit. Air escapes through your nose in a huff of surprise and you hum in his mouth, hips jolting at his touch. He can feel your slickness through your underwear.
“Oh, my pretty girl.” He sighs, breaking the kiss and directing his whispers in your ear again. “All wet for me?”
“Please..” Even with your broken whimper you beg him for more.
“Like this?” His deft fingers swipe your panties to the side, fingers landing directly on the clit this time.
They feel cold at first. The contrast against your heated body makes you squirm and you groan in a soft, high pitch.
“What are you feeling right now?” He pries a verbal response from you, circling your bud lightly. “Tell me.”
“Good.” You sigh, eyes shut as you try to savour the pleasure.
“Good?” His voice is still soft against your ear.
“Mhm.” You nod, one arm draping against his shoulder and the other hand running along his scruffy jaw. “So good.”
“And this?” He adds pressure to his movements. “Does this feel good?”
Your hips buck again and he feels rewarded when you moan. There’s no doubt that the sound of your voice is his favourite. He especially loves it when it’s directed at him. Whether that be in the form of a laugh or your sweet moans. It makes him somewhat dizzy. His lips attach to the skin just under your jaw in an attempt to coax more.
It’s very effective. Fingers working your bundle of nerves, circling and flicking while changing the pressure, and mouth kissing and sucking near your pulse. It makes your back arch, hand gripping his shoulder so you don’t float away. He’s careful not to leave any purple traces of him on your neck, mindful of you being bombarded with questions from your colleagues.
“I love how reactive you are, Angel. You sound divine– fuck.” He can’t help the grunt that escapes him. “You are divine.”
His touch alone is enough to make you feel electric, but the sweet nothings he’s whispering in your ear will be what send you over the edge. It’s a foreign feeling, being reminded that he values you for more than just your body. Just under an hour ago you had incredibly high walls built around you and none of them are left standing as you exposed under him.
Spencer’s not the first man to touch you, but he is the first that loves you. It’s something you’re not at all used to and it feels as overwhelming as it does good. It transcends the want, no, the need for the man on top of you beyond lust or love. You plan to show him just how strong that need is tonight.
The carpeted floor is littered with your clothes, carelessly thrown around and tiny chess pieces scattered around the abandoned chess board. Spencer’s comfortably lying on the couch, facing the ceiling and you’re lying directly on top of him with your face buried in his neck.
You run your fingers back and forth along his jaw, scratching his beard in slow streaks. He’s enveloped you in his arms, one around your lower back and the other playing with your hair. It doesn’t feel as peaceful as it seems, both of you are afraid of being the first to speak. You know you can’t stay like this forever and you decide to bite the bullet.
“Spencer?”
You only get silence from his end. You know he’s awake because his motions in your hair don’t stop. You push yourself up to face him, trying to study his face. The sudden movement brings him back from wherever he was zoned out to.
“Hm?” His features jump.
Does he regret it?
“What’s wrong?” Your voice shakes from worry. “You have this look on your face.”
“Nothing’s wrong. I’m just thinking.”
“About…?”
“How bad we are at communicating.” He chuckles. “It’s concerning when you think about how all we ever do is talk.”
Hearing this makes you snort and you fall into him again. It sends both of you into a short fit of laughter.
“Oh that’s promising for the success of this relationship.” You giggle, sarcasm evident.
Hearing relationship makes Spencer inhale sharply.
“So you’re staying?”
“Well obviously, Dingbat.” You scoff playfully at the question and shift upright, straddling him. “But we really do need to get better at the communication thing for this to work.”
Spencer mounts his weight on his hands by either side of him and pushes himself up to you, stealing a deep kiss.
“Yes, we absolutely do.” He whispers, breaking away for only a second.
The kisses fizzle in you a plethora of smaller kisses.
“Spencer, I’m– serious.” You voice in between, loosely draping your arms on his shoulders.
“I am too.” He says in a hushed tone as he pulls away.
“I want to take it– this,” you motion between the two of you with your finger, “us, slow. Not four years slow, but, like, by a couple of months at the very least.”
“Okay.” He agrees, his eyes scouring your face with complete adoration. It’s not ideal, but he understands where you’re coming from.
“That means that we start again. Romantically. We have to talk about a lot of things first.”
He shifts his body out from under you, resting his back properly against the couch and pulls you back into his lap in one swift motion. Both of his hands graze from your shoulder to your wrist.
“How about…you come over this weekend,” He suggests, wrapping his arms around your waist for a hug, “we’ll do snacks, a movie, maybe an actual game of chess.”
“That sounds like a date.” You wrap your arms around his neck to return the gesture and lean your forehead against his.
“It’s not a date. Not yet, anyways.” He whispers. “I’m asking you to come over this weekend so we can talk about things properly, because frankly, I don’t think either of us is in the right headspace for it right now.”
“Should I be offended at that?” You giggle, not entirely sure what he’s alluding to.
“No!” He snorts with a high tone. “Dopamine aside, our Norepinephrine and Serotonin levels are too high right now for us to have a proper conversation about this.”
“I’m not saying that you’re wrong, because you’re not, but I also think you’re just using science to try and confuse me, so that I agree to wherever this speech is heading.”
“It’s times like this where your attentiveness puts me at a disadvantage, because this tactic has a hundred percent success rate on everybody else.” He grins and you chuckle, both leaning in for another kiss.
“Can we hold off on starting over? Just for tonight.” He reluctantly voices, not wanting to push any boundaries.
You draw back and raise your eyebrows with your eyes widened.
“Spence, I have waited for years for this. You’re insane if you think I’m giving that up without relishing in it for at least a night. We’re not starting over until we’re both officially back on the clock.”
“Okay.” He heaves from relief, leaning in for another kiss, but quickly withdraws with a new question. “Don’t you think the team’s going to be suspicious when we’re not fighting tomorrow?”
“Forget them, what am I gonna say to Hotch when I ask to withdraw my resignation?” You huff out a tiny groan. “He’s gonna hate me for all this paperwork.”
Paperwork reminds you why you’re here to begin with. You audibly gasp, jumping off Spencer and scrambling to put your clothes back on.
“Fuck! Spencer, get dressed!”
Spencer doesn’t share your panic, but adheres to your demand. You mutter a continuous line of obscenities as you throw on your clothes and when you don’t seem to be getting calmer, he intervenes.
“Hey, hey, hey!” He coos as he steps towards you, still undressed on the upper-half. “What’s wrong?”
“What’s wrong is that we’ve been here for hours!” You shriek, now fully dressed.
You push past Spencer and grab his shirt, deciding that he was too slow on his own. He lets you dress him as he probes further.
“That’s okay. No one’s going to notice this late.”
“No– Spence–” You sigh, throwing your head back. “In less than four hours, Hotch is going to walk into his office expecting the Anchorage report on his desk. I’ve barely been able to get half of it done in weeks, how am I going to finish it in four hours?”
You shake your head and begin working on his buttons. He grabs your wrists, urging you to look at him.
“You’ll have it done in less than one. I’ll help you!” His voice is light, airy, soft and accompanied with a chuckle.
“Spencer, you’ve already been here later than you need to be. It’s okay–”
“Let me help you.” He resorts to pleading, releasing your wrists and cupping your face.
You don’t have it in you to argue, his eyes staring back at you with sincerity. He wants to help. There’s no point in pushing him away, because as scared as you are about being too vulnerable with your trauma from that case, you trust him wholeheartedly. You know he won’t push for more than what you choose to share right now.
“Okay.” You nod and smile into the kiss he leans in for after the confirmation.
“Okay. Now, you go and start some coffee.” he instructs softly with a wide grin, waving to the scattered chess ensemble. “ I’m going to clean up here and join you.”
“I love you!” You lean for another kiss and hushedly exclaim as you break away, receding towards the door.
It’s Spencer’s turn to lose his breath. He’s affirmed his love for you countless times tonight and this is the first time you’ve verbally reciprocated it. He knows that it won’t be the last time either. That, to him, makes him the luckiest man in the world. He stops you from going any further by your arm and gently yanks you in his direction, crashing his lips with yours.
“I love you too.” He whispers after the kiss, letting you go.
Heat rises in your face again and you struggle to hide a huge dopey smile, one that Spencer has too. You’re floating on cloud nine, finally out of the blurry hurricane you’ve endured for months. There’s still a lot of things that you need to work out, but the thought of them doesn’t make you feel dread like it once did.
"One word frees us of all the weight and pain in life. That word is Love." - Socrates
Spoilers: Yapperoni (so much dialog in this chapter), BAU! Reader, enemies (kinda) to lovers, hurt, comfort, love confessions (they might be a little too sappy, idk, I was sleep deprived), the praise made me giddy at some point, smut but I edge you by not writing out everything, happy ending.
AN - I have a little tiny fear that people (me) will nawt (I don’t) fuck with this monstrosity, but out of all my drafts, this felt like the most natural course of action. I thought it would be really fun to go from friends to enemies to lovers. Now, literally nobody talk to me about writing fics after this. Uni’s started, so I’ll be very inconsistent for a bit. Casual reminder: I am not Spencer Reid. I don’t have an IQ of 187. Any facts I make him spew could very well be bull-shit and he only spews them for the purpose of the story. I also have no knowledge of how the FBI works and lack a ton of common sense. A lot of things were made up for the purpose of this story.
A comment today keeps semicolon away (from showing up to your house and eating all your snacks).
Thank you for reading!
#spencer reid fanfiction#spencer reid x reader#spencer reid x you#spencer reid imagine#spencer reid#criminal minds fanfiction#criminal minds imagine#criminal minds x reader#criminal minds fandom#ssa spencer reid#bau team#spencer reid fic#spencer reid angst#angst fic#criminal minds angst#spencer reid x fem!reader#fem!reader#dr spencer reid#spencer reid smut#criminal minds smut#smut#smut fic#the smut doesn't occur all the way#; fics
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hold my hand, lean on me
synopsis - jiaoqiu adjusting to domestic life with you
includes - jiaoqiu
warnings - gn!reader, spoilers for 2.5, angst w/ some comfort, fluff, maybe ooc, wc - 1.3k
a/n: i actually cannot get this darn foxian out my mind :( shouts to @thelightofmylife for some vv helpful pointers and information ^^ tbh i feel like this is just 1.3k words of word vomit HAHA
the healers finished informing you of the situation, thanking them you then closed the door to the shared abode. a sigh you didn't know you were holding back escaped alongside a glance down to the papers the healer's handed over. you could read them later, the news followed by the details of it wasn't exactly a pleasant thought, if anything it might be a final push for the tears to start falling.
your thoughts were distracted by the sound of hesitant, shuffling footsteps. turning around, you were met with the sight of jiaoqiu standing idly not too far from you - almost as if he was taking in the surroundings, although now it was more him trying to piece together the memories of what it looked like.
jiaoqiu had arrived back at the yaoqing not too long ago, admittedly rather late, but the luofu's alchemy commission had kept him for a while. he'd been forced immediately to the yaoqing’s alchemy commission as they were now the ones responsible for his treatment plan for the future. a short talk with them had then led to him being escorted back home. to you.
upon arrival, some of the alchemy commission healers explained to you about the entire situation. they kept it short but soon handed you a full document containing everything from “patient’s injuries” to “doctor’s post-charge advice” - each and every sentence pained you more and more, you refused to acknowledge what would've happened if moze hadn't found him, you would have to thank him later.
the healers had asked you to take upon the responsibility of looking after him at home, and in most day to day life scenarios - at least until he adjusted properly. they asked you to keep strict to the “post-charge advice” as otherwise it probably would cause more harm to him, making his healing process longer and maybe even worsening it beyond healing.
“jiao-ge” you called out, to let him know that you were still near. it pained to see the somber look on his face. the last thing jiaoqiu saw wasn't anyone, anywhere or anything he loved. no. it was something he hated, someone he loathed in unfamiliar territory surrounded by no-one he knew.
now he stood in familiar territory, with the person he loved the most. but he couldn't bask in the sights or even see you. all he had was memories to cast images in his mind, to help pretend that nothing was wrong and that he could see what he remembered.
you knew that he wouldn't want you doting on him. jiaoqiu needed to adjust, to learn how to go about his life as usual and you overly fussing over him would only probably annoy him and prolong that.
it had been a long day, any proper conversations could be held tomorrow. to no surprise, jiaoqiu insisted he could get ready and do everything by himself. you granted him that independence. eventually, admittedly with some help, you two were ready for sleep. and even though you were right there beside him, jiaoqiu never felt further from you.
---✩
the process was slow. nobody would've said that it was going to be anything other than that. jiaoqiu very clearly wanted independence. he didn't want to seen as a burden, he chose to do this, and knowing that people were constantly doting on him instead of continuing with their lives made him feel awful.
one of the first things you did was help make your shared abode more compatible with his needs. an easy step was making sure that everywhere was clean and free of obstruction, normally moze always
showed up and helped with cleaning as well. another step was helping jiaoqiu become able to navigate the home on his own, mainly he acted on memory but you needed to make sure that where he frequented was always obstruction free.
occasionally you could hear a bump or hurried shuffling from the room over, each and every time you dropped what you were doing and checked up on him. it was never anything major and if anything it always resulted in jiaoqiu silently cursing at the piece of furniture he walked into.
you two always adopted a verbal calling system at home. should you need to leave the room he was in, you would tell him exactly where you were going and what you were doing - that way he knew where you were. jiaoqiu would also inform you of where he planned on going just in case something happened or he got lost.
although, admittedly, for the first couple of weeks jiaoqiu stuck to you like glue. to him, it was a way to quickly adjust and therefore he wouldn't have to be a burden for long. however jiaoqiu subsequently had developed a rather interesting habit, one neither of you addressed - you because you thought it was sweet and didn't want to embarrass him, him because he didn't want to admit it.
and that was him using his tail as a guidance. at home, it was either curled around your waist, wrist or leg. in public, it lingered around your wrist, so much so that it constantly tickled you. it was a way of him making sure you were there with him, you hadn't left him and he was okay.
although most admittedly it was worse at night. he would hold you close, an ironclad grip that usually you would ask for him to let up but you knew he needed this. tail curled around your waist, preventing you from escaping. in his opinion, you helped him sleep easier, much easier than any fragrances he was prescribed.
however, this always came with a risk. due to residual lupitoxin still in his body, jiaoqiu became frequently prone to nightmares which plagued him constantly. everytime his mind was tricked into believing that the borisin were waiting, patiently looking for an opening to get revenge.
he wakes up because of them, drenched in fear and swear, and because he's so fearful the lupitoxin can take hold easier. suddenly he's tricked into believing that the borisin have found him. unbeknownst to the fact that it's you. so you sometimes take the liberty of sleeping away from him, but then he wakes up to an empty bead but he can hear someone in the room over and when he finds out it was you, sleeping away from him, he becomes consumed with guilt.
a major change for him was his inability to cook anymore. jiaoqiu was determined to do so with his impairment but he needed to learn. nowadays you cook with him. instead of being hushed out of the kitchen, you stood closely beside him, handing him the tools he needed, telling him where you put them so he could find them again on his own.
gently reminding him to lay off the spices when he requested more, he was to avoid spicy foods at all costs for the time being. a hard change, one that he absolutely despised but he knew better than to go against a doctor's order. helping him go out and buy ingredients, listening to what he told you and carrying out the tasks diligently.
---✩
and that was a shortlist of changes. you were very happy to accommodate anything for him, so long as he felt comfortable and loved. it wasn't uncommon for jiaoqiu to experience major lows, it was only natural and you needed to be there for him.
to listen to him, to show him that the support he needed was always a simple ask away - you didn't want to push to dote on him for many reasons. but that was different to showing genuine care and love to him when he started seeing himself as a useless, dependent person.
life would be different. for a while or maybe even forever, perhaps feixiao would strike lucky in her search for a healer that knew how to help. but for now, you two would have to learn how to adjust. to be there for eachother.
taglist - @little-miss-chaoss, @frankiesteinn
#—stellaronhvnters.#x reader#x gender neutral reader#honkai star rail x reader#hsr x reader#honkai star rail x gender neutral reader#hsr x gender neutral reader#honkai star rail x you#hsr x you#jiaoqiu x reader#jiaoqiu x you#hsr jiaoqiu#honkai star rail jiaoqiu
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Between Lines
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Sub!Kenma x Fem!reader
CW: caught jerking off, reader a lil mean, begging, kenma being a cry baby, phone smut
A/N: Kinda rushed this one tbh.. I don’t know if I’m a fan of it but I liked the idea
WC: 1,360
Kenma's quiet demeanor was a defining trait, one that set him apart from the crowd. He wasn't one to actively seek out friendships, nor did he make much effort to engage in conversations with girls.
However, you were the exception. The circumstances of how your nightly calls began was something Kenma could not recall; but it was evolved from your shared love of video games. But once the controllers were set aside for the night, the conversations continued.
Despite his reputation for silence, Kenma was an attentive listener. He found solace in the sound of your voice, absorbing every detail you shared – whether it was the latest gossip, your favorite TV shows, or the mundane details of your day. He was content with this, offering only occasional interjections or quiet chuckles in response.
When the topic inevitably turned to him, Kenma's responses were dry, stale. I mean, you tried to talk about him, but it’s like he was on a witness protection program. He always found a way to turn the conversations back to you.
You weren’t exactly sure why, as sometimes you would have to ask “Are you still there, Kozu?"
A soft "mhmm" would be his only response, a subtle reassurance that he was indeed still listening.
Tonight was no exception. The clock ticked past 10:00 pm, leaving Kenma’s room dark as he lay on his bed, phone pressed to his ear. Your voice filled the room, animated and excited as you recounted the latest episode from your favorite TV show.
"But can you believe that plot twist?" you exclaimed, your excitement palpable even through the phone.
"Yeah, it was unexpected," Kenma replied, his tone calm but laced with a hint of amusement.
As the conversation continued, Kenma found himself lying there, feeling embarrassingly aroused. Lately, he had been struggling to find release, but there was something about the sound of your voice that seemed to make him undeniably hard.
His hand started to wander lower, venturing into forbidden territory where his boxers were already dampened with precum.
"That reminds me, Kozu! What you pulled off during the last match was pretty impressive," you enthusiastically complimented him, completely unaware of the effect your words were having on him.
“o-oh really?” He asked shakily, shamelessly teasing his overly sensitive pink tip.
"Mhmm, good job, Kozu.” You chuckled, praising him once more for his gaming skills.
Now, of all times, was the worst moment to praise him like that. He was already so aroused! The tone of your voice, your affectionate words, and just your presence in general was too much for him. By now, he was shakily jerking himself off, beads of precum leaking out of his tip.
He attempted to stifle his sounds of pleasure, but his efforts were in vain as a loud moan escaped him, broadcasting through the mic. His moment of ecstasy was abruptly halted when the realization of his mistake hit him.
"Kozu?" you asked, surprised at his unexpected reaction. Kenma didn’t know what to do with himself. He could die right about now. The one time he decided to let into his urges and he gets caught!
Before he could gather his thoughts to respond, you continued with a mischievous tone, "Have you been getting off to my voice every night?" Kenma's cheeks flushed even deeper as he struggled to find words, caught off guard by your bold question.
"N-no... I just... I'm sorry," Kenma whimpered out, his embarrassment evident in his voice. Somehow, he found himself even more aroused than before. Being caught by you had an unexpected effect on his body.
He braced himself for your potential reaction—scolding, perhaps even the silent treatment, or worse. But instead, your voice cut through his panicked thoughts, softer than before, calm and understanding,
"Did you cum yet?" you asked curiously, your tone indicating a desire to help with his predicament.
"W-what?" Kenma asked, still expecting a reprimand from you, his confusion evident in his voice.
“Cum? Did you?” you asked, this time with a slightly firmer tone.
"N-n, no.. no I didn’t," Kenma told you anxiously, unable to believe you would ask him something so intimate.
“Do you want to?” you inquired, your tone still gentle, yet probing. Kenma couldn't decipher how you felt about the situation, but he responded with a shaky "yes," although it was an obvious answer.
Your light laughter filled the air, further fueling Kenma's embarrassment. "I won't stop you, Kozu. I was waiting for something like this to happen," you admitted seductively, your words sending a shiver down his spine.
Kenma let out a soft whine, feeling a mixture of embarrassment and arousal coursing through him at your candid admission.
His hand slowly made its way back down to his aching cock, ready to relive himself of this burning feeling.
"What... what do you mean?" Kenma let out shakily, running his hand over the length of his throbbing erection. God, he was incredibly turned on right now, teetering on the edge of climax with every touch.
"Oh, come on," you teased, as if he should have known what you meant all along, though maybe he did, he wasn't sure. "Do you think I spend hours talking to you even when it’s late just for fun? I like you, Kozume. I really do," you confessed, as if it were the most obvious thing in the world.
This time, Kenma let out a loud moan in response. You? You liked him? It was all too much for him to process.
"I want to see you," he whined, his voice filled with desperation, the sound of his frantic movements against his cock audible through the speaker, causing you to clench around nothing.
"You sound so pretty right now. I wish it was my hand doing the work for you," you remarked, ignoring his attempts at flattery.
He continued to diligently pleasure himself, while you comforted him with soft words, unwittingly encouraging his actions.
His breath became heavier, punctuated by moans and whimpers. "Please," he breathed out, nearing the edge of his climax.
"Please what, Kozu? Do you want to cum?" you asked warmly, causing him to nod his head rapidly, as if you could see him.
"Hmm?" you questioned at his silence. He let out a shy "can I?" seeking your permission for release.
"I don’t know…" you trailed off, feigning contemplation. "I’m kind of upset you touched yourself to my voice without me knowing. You're such a little pervert," you chided, and Kenma couldn't help but let out a mangled sob, his hand slowing its pace in response to your disapproval.
Hearing his slowed motions, you quickly scolded him,
"Don’t slow down if I didn’t tell you to.” This time you were much harsher than he expected. Tears began running down his burning cheeks, small apologies leaving his wet lips.
“If you wanna cum, beg," your demeanor shifted quickly, fueling his arousal even more.
He couldn’t believe you would make him do something so lewd, but he was too far gone to stop himself, "Please.. p-please [name], 'wanna cum so bad! I'm sorry.. mm sorry!" Kenma's voice came out in pitiful sobs, his desperation evident.
The sound of your tongue clicking, as if you weren’t satisfied with his pleas, only made him more desperate.
“I don’t know… maybe I should make you wait until I can touch you,” you remarked. But all Kenma could focus on was the “until I can touch you.”
The thought of you, looking at him with those pretty eyes as you made him cum on himself over and over again, was too much.
He let out more pleas and whimpers, his hips buckling pathetically into his own hand.
“I need to cum, it hurts. I haven’t in sooo long. Please, just this once.. one time,” he rambled, trying to convince you.
"Alright baby, let it out," you finally relented, and Kenma's moans grew louder as thick white ropes of cum flew out from his sensitive tip, coating his pale stomach. Small thank yous and pieces of your name left his lips as he hit his peak.
"Who knew someone so quiet would moan so loud," you remarked, a hint of amusement in your voice.
#sub haikyuu#dom reader#hq kenma#kozume kenma#kenma x reader#sub!character#sub!kenma#haikyu x reader#haikyu smut#haikyuu#dom!reader#phone#begginer writer#haikyu x you#kenma x you#kenma x y/n#haikyuu kenma#kenma#kenma fluff#video games#smut
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Aaron Hotchner x non bau rich reader. Like a part 2. Reader meets the BAU but they are impressed like reader is so rich but humble and loves Aaron and Jack so much.
The mystery woman | [A.H]
Pairing: Aaron Hotchner x rich fem!reader | WC: 1.1k | CW: nothing it's fluff
A/N: I loooveeeeddd working on this!!!!!
Hotch's relationship with you had always been something of a mystery to his team. While he was naturally private about his personal life, the snippets they’d heard over time painted a picture of someone warm, grounded, and, to their surprise, immensely wealthy. It was something they hadn’t expected — someone who seemed to belong to an entirely different world yet had seamlessly become a part of Hotch and Jack’s.
They never pried — Hotch would have shut that down in an instant — but curiosity lingered nonetheless. For all his long hours, endless casework, and rarely taking a day off, somehow Hotch had managed to meet someone so different from the chaotic nature of the BAU. It wasn’t just your wealth that fascinated them; it was how easily you fit into his life. If anything, it only fueled their curiosity. How had someone as busy and emotionally guarded as Hotch caught someone like you?
It wasn’t lost on the team that Hotch rarely spoke about you unless someone specifically asked. Even then, he was usually brief — mentioning how you’d taken Jack to the park or baked cookies for a school event. But the way his expression softened at the mention of your name hinted at something deeper, something they all could sense but couldn’t quite pin down — something that hinted at a human connection he hadn't felt since Haley.
That curiosity finally found an outlet when you joined Aaron and Jack at Rossi’s dinner party.
Rossi had insisted that the whole BAU team come together, spouses included, determined to create an evening to wind down, where hopefully work could be forgotten for a while. Naturally, the team had been eager to meet you, though they hadn’t dared to push Hotch for details.
Hotch had paused just long enough for the team to notice before replying, almost offhandedly, that he wasn’t sure if you were coming when Rossi announced the party. Your schedule that week had been especially hectic, and he didn't want to pressure you to join if you didn't have the time. “She’s… busy,” he had said, the slight hesitation in his voice giving away a faint uncertainty about whether you’d even be able to attend.
It was enough for the team to conclude: you, too, were a workaholic. Of course, you were — you had to be, considering the kind of lifestyle and responsibilities they imagined you must manage. The thought only added to their intrigue. What kind of person juggled such an overwhelming schedule yet found time to date?
But what they didn’t know — what Hotch himself hadn’t quite expected — was how enthusiastic you were about attending. The moment you’d heard about the dinner, you had set to work rearranging your obligations, clearing your calendar, and delegating tasks. While your schedule may have been packed, you never hesitated to prioritize moments like these.
“I wouldn’t miss it,” you had told Aaron firmly, brushing aside his protest about how much effort it would take to move things around. The excitement in your voice had been unmistakable. It wasn’t just about meeting his team—it was about being there for him and Jack, stepping into a part of their world that mattered so much to them, about meeting their family, and showing how much you truly cared for them.
It was a side of you that Aaron cherished, though he rarely spoke of it to others: your ability to make time for the people you loved, no matter how busy life got. And now, as the dinner drew closer, the team’s long-standing curiosity was about to be answered.
When you arrived, dressed impeccably but not overly flashy, the team’s first impression was of someone who exuded elegance. The second thing they noticed — impossible to miss really — was the way Jack clung to your hand, his small fingers wrapped around yours like he never wanted to let go. His face lit up the moment you stepped through the door, his excitement bubbling over instantly.
“Uncle Dave, this is Y/N!” Jack declared proudly as he tugged you forward. “She’s the best. She makes the most awesome pancakes!”
The team exchanged amused glances, charmed by the adoration in Jack’s voice. Even Hotch, standing off to the side, looked relaxed with a rare smile on his lips as he watched the interaction.
You laughed and crouched slightly to tousle Jack’s hair. “Jack’s biased,” you teased as you glanced up at Rossi. Straightening, you extended a hand to greet him with a polite, confident handshake. “But I’ll take the compliment.”
Rossi grinned, shaking your hand firmly. “Well, anyone who can win over Jack is already a favorite in my book.”
The casual ease of the interaction left the rest of the team intrigued. While they had expected someone polished, they hadn’t anticipated such genuine warmth. You seemed entirely unaffected by the fact that you were meeting a room full of highly trained profilers. Instead, you carried yourself with a natural charm that immediately put everyone at ease, making it clear that, to you, this wasn’t a performance or an obligation.
And as Jack dragged you over to show you a plate of cookies Rossi had set out, the team couldn’t help but exchange glances. This was someone who had Jack’s trust and admiration. If there had been any lingering doubts about what kind of person had captured Aaron Hotchner’s heart, they were already starting to dissipate.
As the evening unfolded, the team couldn’t help but admire how effortlessly you navigated the gathering. You shared stories of your philanthropic ventures but downplayed your role in running them. When asked about your background, you focused on your hobbies and interests rather than the lavish lifestyle they knew you could easily flaunt.
But what stood out most was your connection with Aaron and Jack. You weren’t just present; you were integral. When Jack pulled you to sit with him, you leaned in to listen as if whatever he was saying was the most important thing in the world. And Aaron had a softness in his eyes when he looked at you.
At one point, JJ leaned toward Emily. “I don’t think I’ve ever seen him this happy.”
“Or Jack this smitten,” Emily added, watching as Jack giggled uncontrollably at some joke you whispered in his ear.
Later in the evening, Spencer approached you hesitantly, curious but respectful. “I hope this isn’t intrusive, but… how do you balance everything? Your work, your family, and, well…” He glanced at Aaron and Jack, who were chatting nearby.
You smiled, thoughtful. “It’s not always easy, but with him, it’s worth it. Jack too. They remind me that it’s not about how much you have or do — it’s about who you share it with.”
As the night ended, the team left with a newfound understanding of the person who had captured Hotch's heart. You weren’t just wealthy; you were kind, and deeply in love with Aaron and Jack. And for the first time in a long time, they saw their unit chief not as their leader who had gone through so much but as a man who’d found something extraordinary — someone extraordinary.
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#rich!reader#aaron hotchner#hoe4hotchner answers#criminal minds#aaron hotchner x reader#hotch#hotch thoughts#criminal minds x reader#hotchner#x reader#hotch x you#aaron hotchner x you#aaron hotchner x y/ n#aaron hotchner x female reader#aaron hotchner fic#ssa aaron hotchner#aaron hotchner imagine#aaron hotch hotchner#aaron hotchner fanfiction#aaron hotch#aaron#thomas gibson#aaron hotchner one shot#aaron hotch x reader#aaron hotch fanfiction#aaron hotch imagine#aaron hotchner fanfic#my fic#my writing
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──★ ˙🌟 ̟ !! gold star redemption program. 18+!
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☆⌒(ゝ。∂).ᐟ ᴛᴇᴀᴍ ʙʟᴜᴇ ʟᴏᴄᴋ's ғᴀᴠᴏʀɪᴛᴇ ᴍᴀɴᴀɢᴇʀ
✿ ─ synopsis: you are the new manager for team blue lock and you have a great idea to make the players get along better. after all, positive reinforcement worked really well on dogs, why not men? ✿ ─ characters: isagi yoichi, bachira meguru, shidou ryusei, itoshi rin, chigiri hyoma + kunigami rensuke referenced ✿ ─ cw: smut, fem!reader, she/her pronouns used, aged-up!characters(18+), pet names, kissing, penetrative sex, oral receiving/giving, semi-public sex, unprotected sex, hair pulling, overstimulation, rough sex, deepthroating/face-fucking, non-exclusive relationships, lots of jealousy, pda, use of foul language, suggestive themes, shidou is an asshole, rin threatens murder, somewhat proofread ✿ ─ notes: okay so every is going to ignore the logistics and mental gymnastics done to put all these guys on the same team and have any of this go on, right? cool. this work was requested by @anastasiablossomlove pls enjoy!
managing team blue lock was no task for a person of average conviction. anyone with less of a spine would be easily trampled and consumed by the members, all with big personalities and even bigger egos. you took to the role with exceptional organizational skills and a positive attitude that didn’t falter, even under the cold glares of the less compliant men of the team (cough cough itoshi rin cough cough barou shouei). before the end of your first week you had drafted up detailed and individualized meal plans, unique to each of them. by the second you had worked with the coach to create special training regimes that works towards their fitness goals while providing challenge and variety. right under their noses you dug your pretty fingers into every part of team blue lock, finding every issue and soothing every conflict, turning a group of somewhat wild animals into a well functioning machine with you at its core.
and not a detail slipped your eye. you could always tell when kunigami had pushed himself too hard in the gym by the stiffness in his shoulders. honestly you doubt you would’ve been able to convince him to let you help him if he wasn’t just as sore as you predicted. but the minute your palms were pressing into his back he was groaning in relief, “you’re an angel” grumbled under his breath. he’s a bit less embarrassed the next time around, blushing while asking you to fix him like you did last time.
you quickly took responsibility for doing chigiri’s hair before every practice and game. after seeing it fall out of its style and flap wildly in his face whenever he reached top speed on the field, you decided he needed something a little more reliable to keep it out the way so his eyes could stay on the ball. though when his hair was this soft, who could blame you for taking a bit longer than necessary, brushing through the knots and gently scratching at his scalp. plus, he didn’t seem to mind all that much, always red faced and all smiles, leaning into your touch. the thank you kiss he plants on your cheek lingers long enough to leave a matching blush on your face as a token of his appreciation.
being the backbone of their system earned you respect, acknowledgement, even affection from the overly friendly members of the team (cough cough bachira meguru cough cough shidou ryusei). no one could deny the benefits of having you around, always offering all kinds of helpful advice and showed not a shred of judgment when listening to their problems. and you weren’t exactly ignorant to the fact that your constant support was causing some of your new friends to become especially attached to you. maybe to someone else it would be a bigger concern, but in your eyes, this was only another opportunity to do more for your team.
that’s why you implemented the gold star redemption program to help motivate them. it was quite simple to follow, you had a chart with all of their names along with cute, slightly wonky doodles of them, and a list of ways to earn gold stars. from goals and assists to being on good behavior, whatever way they earn their stars, team members can then cash them in for certain prizes from you. the list had looked something like this…
2 ☆ = snack or drink of your choice 4 ☆ = a home cooked meal 5 ☆ = a kiss <3 7 ☆ = a massage <33 10 ☆ = private training session <333
the objective was to give incentives towards cooperation. not to mention, it’s always good to strengthen bonds with your team members. it seems, however, that you underestimated how much of your time this new system would take up. or maybe you just overestimated how easy it would be to keep up with the greedy desires of so many egoists at once.
ever since your arrival, anyone with eyes could see that isagi yoichi carried a torch for you. you let him talk your ear off for hours about tactics and players, never tired of his company or too busy for his rambles. it gets his heart thumping obnoxiously loud in his chest. so yoichi makes it his objective to dote on you as much as possible to try to make up for all the time you spend fussing over everybody else. always staying after practice to help you or walking you home. so when you start handing out stars for that kind of stuff, isagi is already making a steady income. he considers himself a gentleman, so at first he spends his stars on meals. and he’s more than happy to eat your cooking, stirring up all kinds of wifey fantasies in his head and enjoying his lunches with you. but at night, when he’s lying in bed, the big ticket item at the bottom of the prize board haunts him. and when he can’t take it anymore, he slips into your tiny little office that you share with the coach, a self-satisfied smile on his face when he lets you know that he just finished the stat sheets you asked him to fill out, earning him his tenth gold star. enough for one private training session.
in all the times you thought about sex with isagi, you’re not sure you ever pictured it to be like this. bent over your own desk, tennis skirt bunched up around your waist, your star player too eager to sink into your pussy to even push down your underwear. they stayed tugged to the side, thoroughly soaked from the way his hips meet yours in sloppy desperate thrusts. “i knew i needed to fuck you when i saw this skirt,” he confesses, eyes fixed to the point where you connect, mesmerized by the way his cock disappears inside you, “you’ve been tempting me all day, so be a good girl and take my cock, okay?” before you can respond he hooks a finger into the elastic of your panties to let it snap back against your skin, drawing a small yelp from you. he changs the angle to fuck you harder, deeper. you wonder if this could be the same sweet yoichi that carries your things and bashfully tells you your outfit looks good.
apparently that yoichi doesn’t exist once he’s balls deep inside you, all that’s left is the side of him you’ve only caught glimpses of when he’s dominating his opponents on the field. and if you thought that it was a chance encounter, you’re sorely mistaken as week after week isagi makes sure he earns his ten stars and you get to know just how mean he can be. his grip is always tight around your hair, whether it’s pulling and steering you into the position he wants or guiding your head down to take more of his dick. god forbid he asks you nicely for something like he always does when you’re not ‘training’. one time you even had the gall to suggest the idea to him and lived to regret it as now if you want anything from him, isagi is only accepting the most convincing of your begs. “c'mon princess, mind your manners, if you wanna cum then you’re gonna have to ask really nicely.” and no teary eyed puppy dog look will get you what you want, even when he makes getting your words out so difficult. truthfully, he never intends to be so hard on you, but having you crying and begging for his cock is the only way to soothe the devil on his shoulder that tries to tell him to take you for himself. in the aftermath, you start to recognize your yoichi again, sheepish in his apologies for how rough he was with you, kissing away the tears that run down your face. he’s lucky you’re too fucked out to charge him for them.
there’s not a world where you offer bachira meguru sexual favors in exchange for playing soccer and he says no. he was already gonna do that anyway, and now not only does he get to make even more of a game out of it, but his reward for winning is the cute little manager he’s had his eyes on for far too long? consider him sold. bachira knows it would be most fun for him to save up and have sex with you as soon as possible, but all of a sudden he has five and he’s itching for a kiss. one he decides to give you right before practice starts… in front of the whole team. but can you blame him? he’s already been waiting forever to feel those pretty glossed lips on his, you couldn’t really expect him to make it through the next few hours when he’s so close to getting what he wants. and you could maybe understand that, but was it really necessary to go for a full open-mouthed wet almost make out that left you panting when everyone’s eyes were already on you? you suspect not, but bachira doubles down, telling you it was of upmost importance that he got it in, else he wouldn’t be able to focus. he neglects to tell you that he overheard reo in the locker room talking about what he was gonna do now that he had five stars. shidou already made it very clear that he would be first to ten, so bachira had to be crafty in order to secure at least one first from you.
meguru was certainly one of the more needy players, right under nagi that required some form of encouragement every step of the way to get anything done. bachira usually does what you tell him to, but not without whining about deserving a prize for being good. quite frankly, you dread having to ask anything of him, because he is determined to be fully compensated for even the smallest of requests. even a task as easy as grabbing something on a high shelf was met with a cheeky smirk and a request for a kiss. and don’t think he’ll budge either, holding the item hostage if he thinks he can squeeze two out of you. it didn’t make it any easier that bachira didn’t possess a shy bone in his whole body, openly showering you in affection when the others were around, holding your hand and nuzzling his face into your collar. it was enough to make even a professional like you blush. he acted as if he was oblivious to the jealous stares of his friends, but the smug cat-like smirk he sends them and the way he only holds you tighter when you try to shyly brush him off gives him away. it may come as a surprise considering his reputation for being a bit delusional, but bachira tries to root himself in reality for once. he frequently reminds himself of the nature of your relationship and tries his best not let his imagination run wild with anything that would be beyond the boundaries you’ve clearly set. things like picturing himself taking you on dates, coming home to you at night, introducing you to his mom. they were all too dangerous to let his mind settle on them for too long.
and what better distraction than burying his face between your thighs. it’s hard to think of much when he hasn’t bothered to stop lapping at your cunt long enough to take a breath in a couple minutes. suffocating was the least of his concerns when the clench around his fingers lets him know your orgasm is just around the corner. meguru swears that your pathetic little whimpers and the slick dripping down his chin are like a straight hit of dopamine to his brain and he’s at real risk of addiction at this point. lidded amber eyes travel up to watch your expression twist into one of pleasure as you gasp out his name. now that catches his interest. when your vision clears and your brain is functioning again after that intense high, you search for his comfort as if you had done any of the hard work. but all you’re met with is that signature wild look that he gets when he brushing past the enemy team’s defense straight towards his goal. it’s your only warning that he’s far from tired and even farther from sated. “if i can keep going, so can you baby. i know you have more for me. jus’ need t’see you make that face one more time.” you have no room to protest, his tongue already finding your clit and working towards bringing you to the edge once again. by your fourth time cumming, you’re sobbing for a break and debating whether you should charge him four times over or give him a star for each one.
someone who was on board with your system from the second that you explained how it worked, was shidou ryusei. what better way to celebrate another one of his blood pumping, heart stopping performances than racing to the locker room to blow a load in his favorite girl while his teammates debrief with the coach? to him it was simple, you fuck him, you feed him, you take care of him, you spend time with him. shidou is, by all of his definitions, dating you. while some might be turned off by the idea of dating someone who isn’t offering exclusivity, he didn’t see it as much of an obstacle. not when he spent star stickers like a gambler on a slot machine, having you multiple times a week if the economy allowed it. and if he’s short a few, no worries, ryusei is quite the negotiator. it starts one week when he’s only missing a star or two, promising he’ll pay back the difference, you know he’s a good customer. it’s probably not a good idea to give in to him though, as the next time he wants a private training session, he’ll insist they’re only nine stars for him. he has made all kinds of fake coupons from 50% Off! to Buy One Get One Free! to even a homemade punch card in his own terrible handwriting. shidou was the first one to ever get a star taken away when he tried to give you an arby’s gift card in exchange for a blowjob. he didn’t try that tactic again.
the worst is when he tries to haggle in the middle of sex. your legs are thrown over his shoulders and his tip is kissing your cervix when he chooses to whine about not being able to kiss you because he has no stars left. he worked too hard to get good star credit, he can’t go into star debt!! “ and with his lips just hovering over yours, his hot breath fanning across your face, how could you say no? in a moment of weakness, you have unfortunately given an inch to shidou, infamous mile taker, and now it’s hard to get him to pay for any of his kisses, especially while he’s fucking you. you thank god that at the very least no one knows he’s been getting them for free… if only shidou would allow your life to be that easy. even worse than giving him an inch, you expected shidou to keep a secret. and you thought his big mouth was something you liked about him. until he’s using it to brag to everyone that he’s your favorite, practically your boyfriend, all because you let him get away with a smooch here and there. let’s just say you had to give out a lot of free kisses to smooth over the problem his bragging habits created.
honestly ryusei was starting to cause a lot of confusion outside of the team with his antics. what with his always hanging off your arm, giving you as much affection as you’d tolerate, calling you sweet nicknames. the people in your life were actually starting to believe you two were dating. not that shidou does anything to discourage such rumors, only grinning and agreeing every time someone mistakes you as a couple. hell, he was starting to get you confused, saying things during your training sessions that certainly didn’t fit the transactional nature of the act. “holy shit you’re so tight- love this pussy, l-love you so much. say my name. c’mon baby, say you love me and i’ll make you feel so fucking good.” and only because ryusei always makes good on his promises do you allow yourself another moment of weakness.
itoshi rin didn’t have much interest or faith in you upon first introduction. he sized you up as some nobody doing this whole manager thing as a fun extracurricular, so as long as you stayed out of his way he didn’t care what you did. with his luck, he shouldn’t be surprised that you were immediately in his way, extremely often, rambling to him about ideas and strategies that he had no intention on listening to. although even he could admit, he understood why the others were so easily charmed by you. he was wrong about how seriously you took your job. not that it changed anything. at least that’s what rin tells himself, but in reality your relentless efforts and endless dedication to supporting all of them was something that spoke to him, made him a bit soft for you. it didn’t help that you were his type in every sense of the word, your attractiveness doing nothing but make feigning indifference a lot harder for rin. your seemingly endless patience didn’t help either. you always responded in kind to all of rin’s harsh words and cold stares, never let his sour attitude deter your subtle acts of service like getting grass stains out of his uniform and making sure he stays unbothered during his yoga. against his will, he was slowly warming up to you, but you were still caught off guard when rin started cashing in his stars, even if it was just a meal. he had lots of them sitting idle on the chart waiting to be used, so you supposed it was only natural for him to get some free food out of it. but you were even more taken aback when a couple days later he requested a massage from you with insistence that he only asks because he’s been extremely tense as of late. which wasn’t entirely untrue. rin had been very tense. just not from anything soccer related like he’d like you to believe. he was tense from the stress of his budding feelings for you combined with the dread of knowing he probably will never have you all to himself. at least not with this stupid reward system in place.
he despises it. he absolutely hates going about his day knowing there are other guys, his shithead teammates, that are getting your time, attention, and affection for the price of a couple of stupid fucking stickers. he misses the days when shidou’s incessant bragging about how many times he was able to make you cum or bachira’s unnecessary details of what your pussy tastes like didn’t bother him. now his blood boils to hear them talk about you like that. that kind of anger makes it clear to him that being your friend was simply not an option anymore. which is how he settled on getting a massage from you. he would satisfy this overwhelming craving he has for you and go back to normal and be able to focus solely on becoming best in the world again without thoughts of you plaguing his mind. that was his hope going into it, but feeling your warm touch on his bare back, melting away years of untreated knots and neglected aches in his body, he could almost blush at the intimacy he feels. especially when that foreign kindness he loves so much is on display as you reassure him that there’s nothing to be embarrassed about and that you’re proud he finally put his pride aside long enough to let you help him. you’ve got him, hook, line, and sinker now. no use in struggling so hard, he supposes, as some part of him knows he’s doomed to fall sooner or later. perhaps it’s time to surrender. he fought a good fight, but his greed for you was candidly too tough of an opponent.
and to rin, surrender looked like asking you when’s the soonest he could book a private training session. you don’t think you could look any more shocked. rin had a quick turn around from someone you doubted even liked you, to someone reserving as much of your time as his stars could buy. the more often he was with you, the less time you spent giving those lukewarm brats the treatment he wants reserved for him. and he wishes he gave in a lot sooner when he feels the wet heat of your mouth around his cock for the first time. how fast he would’ve folded if he knew how pretty you would look on your knees for him. rin tried to be gentle and let you set the pace, but between hissing out curses and barely biting back moans, that same greed to get more from you has his hand twisting itself in your hair and pushing down on the back of your head. he couldn’t help it. and it was so worth it to watch you choke and sputter around his length but never pull away. he knew you weren’t a quitter. “shit, feels good… don’t stop,” he all but gasps, hips instinctively jumping to reach further down your throat, grip tightening when you try to come up for air. after a long moment of breathing through your nose you relax enough to let him ease himself the rest of the way in. rin sighs in relief when your nose finally presses against his pelvis. the way you look up at him starry-eyed and full of adoration made his chest feel heavy with desire to be the only one you ever look at. it drives him crazy that any guy on the team can see you like this, and that heartache has rin fucking your face to forget it. “fuckkk. don’t look away, eyes on me, g’nna cum in that pretty mouth.”
you couldn’t deny that your new attempt at encouraging the team had its kinks. while overall the amount of arguments that broke out between players lessened to keep on good star-earning behavior, you could tell that it came with its own set of tension creating problems. you also couldn’t deny that being pulled in every direction by men vying for your attention was both very time consuming and extremely gratifying, but you think you manage it well. save for when they were already pumped up with adrenaline from a game, that is when real issues arise. especially when a player from the enemy team thinks it’s a good idea to try and hit on the cute little lady holding the clipboard. fatal mistake.
it starts with your favorite pot stirrer, bachira, calling out from his position, making everyone else on the team aware of the situation. “no shot dude, she don’t want you! focus on losing!” you’re confident you can diffuse whatever is about to go down before you notice rin leaving the ball alone in centerfield to beeline straight towards you. threats are flying from his lips on approach, quick to get in the guy’s face, planting his hands on his shoulders to shove him back. “what the fuck do you think you’re doing? i’ll kill you if you don’t get the fuck away from her.” you think maybe you have a shot of getting rin under control if you just- your eyes widen in horror as a flash moves in from your peripheral. there are no words, just shidou drop kicking this poor stranger at top speed. you cringe as you watch shidou knocks this guy off his feet, cleats first, taking rin down with him. what a way to earn a red card.
this was a fun project and request tysm!!! i just went about it in the interpretation i found most interesting, i really hope it was to your liking!!!
© 2023 hyomaslut. please do not copy, translate, or repost any of my content onto any other sites.
#divider credit to @cafekitsune#blue lock x reader#bllk x reader#bllk smut#blue lock#bllk#isagi yoichi x reader#rin itoshi x reader#rin itoshi smut#isagi yoichi smut#bachira x reader#bachira meguru x reader#shidou ryusei x reader#shidou ryuusei smut#shidou smut#chigiri x reader#kunigami x reader#miwa sins
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Untitled #9
Wordcount — 1,618 words
Includes — Fem!reader, mentions of contraceptives, unprotected vaginal sex. Dubcon elements (but it is all explained in detail), mentions/fantasies of creampies, use of petnames (baby).
Author's note — Just a little something! I've had this thought for a while now, and I wanted to put it out there. Despite the dubcon elements of it, I really picture both parties being super into it with full consent —for this, the male character just puts up a fight because he considers things risky, but deep down he wants it just as bad. With that in mind, read this if you have no problem whatsoever with some dubcon. If it's not your cup of tea, just scroll!
Just thinking about a forced creampie with Chan.
He had been pretty vocal about how badly he wants to fuck you raw and come inside you, but the overly-reasonable, almost persecutory part of him doesn't let him get loose. Whenever he thinks about coming inside of you, he can't help but also overthink everything that could go wrong.
“Maybe I just need a little push, you know?” He told you right after you asked him what was stopping him from fulfilling his fantasies. “I tend to get too into my head, maybe I should just- I don't know, go for it in the heat of the moment”.
But even in the heat of the moment, Chan holds back. The amount of self-control he has is crazy, so as much as he wishes to get loose, he never manages to do so on his own.
You come up with a plan, but you first make sure that he is on the same page as you —that he wants this just as much as you. So you ask him just that, and the response you get is enough for you to proceed.
“I think about it at least twice a day,” Chan confessed. “I mean, not a day goes by without me thinking about how pretty your pussy would look leaking with my cum”.
So you start off slow —first, you convince him to fuck you without a condom, fully raw. He pulls out every fucking time, much against his lust's will, but you don't mind. At least not when you can now feel every inch of him, every thickness of his veins and the warmth of his bulge. And now, he gets to feel you too —like fully feel you. From your soft walls squeezing his dick, to the sticky arousal that drips out of you.
It doesn't take long for him to get addicted to that feeling, though —despite him “wanting to take things slow”, he soon becomes obsessed and the idea of using a condom ever again is discarded by Chan himself.
So it all starts off with fucking you raw, and it eventually ends up one night with you offering that much needed push to finally allow himself go.
You're on top of him, straddling his lap while his cock reaches the deepest spots inside your pussy. You can feel him twitching inside of you, and if that isn't enough confirmation that he is seconds away from coming, the grimaces of pain and pleasure along with the veins popping on his temple and neck definitely are.
His hands are bruising your hips pretty bad while he guides your movements on top of him —roughly grinding yourself against him, squeezing your walls to provide him with the stimulation he needs to come.
“Just like that,” he groans biting down his lower lip with furrowed eyebrows and eyes closed shut, “come on, fuck yourself on my cock just like that. Make me come”.
Coincidentally, you're trying to do just that. So when he bents his legs against the mattress, and his hands try to push your body away from his, you don't stop.
“Baby,” he groans out your name, whincing in pain the longer he tries to hold his orgasm back, “'m gonna- fuck, I'm close”.
You lean down over his body, placing chaste kisses along his jaw and neck, “give it to me, Chan”.
He squeezes his eyes shut, just as his body stiffens underneath yours, “move, baby”.
“Inside,” you whimper, shaking your head into the crook of his neck. “Come inside”.
Chan's back arches a little, just as he struggles to maneuver your body, but it's all useless —he doesn't have the strength to push you away, and he doesn't want to.
“No, baby,” Chan hisses, gripping your hips as rough as he can. “I can't- please, let me pull out”.
“Come on, Chan,” you plead into his ear, biting his earlobe while your walls clench around his girth, “I know you want to”.
He lets out a painful, exasperated groan in an attempt to hold back the pent up tension between his legs —you can see he is really trying his best not to come.
“Please,” you leave one last wet kiss on his neck before straightening up your body, going from grinding against his cock to fully bouncing on it, “please, come inside me. I need it”.
Chan swears he is going to lose his mind. Between the feeling of your cunt clenching around him, the sight of your pretty body bouncing on top of his, and the lewd words and moans that are leaving your lips, Chan is sure he isn't going to last any longer.
“Let me pull out,” he tells you once again, with no intention of ever wanting you to stop. At this point, Chan still puts up a fight because he doesn't want to give in too easily. But honestly, he is not interested in winning that fight whatsoever, “'m gonna come, baby”.
You press your hands against his chest and increase the pace of your movements, forcing his body underneath yours while caging it with your legs on each side of his body.
His face is flushed, and the painful grimaces and groans he lets out can only warn you that he might not resist any longer.
“Come for me,” you insist, digging your nails on the flesh of his chest, “please, fill me up”.
At one point, he just gives in to his dirtiest fantasies and carnal pleasures. Who is he to deny himself? You're begging for something that only he can give you, and he fucking will.
So the painful moans turn into primal ones, instictual and animalistic. He opens his eyes and stare at you, his hands going from your hips to your neck, choking you ever so slightly as you ride him to his high.
Not only that, but his hips start fucking into yours from underneath —if he is going to come inside you, he is going to have it his way. Meaning he is going to be the one in control, not you.
Your whole body trembles at the unexpected thrusts, and it doesn't take you long to feel a warm, almost hot sensation filling you up.
“You wanted me to come inside you?” He asks through gritted teeth, snapping his hips against yours while your whole body goes limp. Chan hugs you tightly in place, preventing his dick from sliding out of you, “you better not fucking waste it, then”.
He milks himself inside you with each thrust, letting out deep grunts of pleasure in between.
“Chan,” you gasp when you feel his cum oozing out of your pussy and around his cock, all while he is inside you, “fuck”.
Even after a few seconds, he feels he isn't done yet —he is still throbbing and pulsating inside your walls, and he just can't stop shooting his cum into you. This is the first time he comes like this, and it is as painful as it is pleasurable.
“It's dripping out of me,” you murmur when he finally slows down, looking down to where your bodies connect —it's messy, but neither of you can begin to care. At least not when it feels this good to be filled.
Chan lets out a deep exhale, his chest moving frantically as he tries to catch his breath. He feels defeated, and weak, but at the same time he can't wrap his head about how good it fucking felt to finally let go, to be able to fuck you full of his cum until it dripped out of your tight hole.
So much so, that the idea of pulling out and coming anywhere else it's just not an option any more.
And just like he got addicted to fucking you raw, he might be addicted to stuff you full of his cum now too.
He just needed a little push.
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Dick sat at the dinning room table, his case files scattered and his dinner cold. The room was quiet and fairly dim, his only light source was from a small lamp in the kitchen. He eyed the clock on the stove and then leaned back against his chair. The hard metal felt cool against his bare skin and he ran his hands across his face, frustrated.
There was a sudden upsurge of crimes in Bludhaven, all different MO’s, however, Dick couldn’t help but shake the feeling that there was something else going on. There was a connection there, he just didn’t know what it was yet.
Dick pulled his hands away from his face and went back to the file that laid in front of him. He read to himself silently, highlighting and circling important details, trying to find the missing link between the crimes.
It seemed as if hours had passed by, his body ached and his fingers felt sore, but he carried on with his research, desperate and determined.
“Dick, you’re still awake,” your gentle voice suddenly spoke up, pulling him out his trance. He finished reading his sentence before he looked up at you.
He stared at your heavy-eyed and sluggish state, he smiled at the sight of your messy hair. You looked breathtakingly beautiful to him.
“Yeah, I’m almost done though,” he said, yawning. You walked over to the dinning table, the pads of your feet softly tapping against the wooden floors, and you sat down on the chair next to him. He reached his hand out, and with just one swift move, pulled the chair closer to him. It scratched against the floor and you gasped at the sudden movement.
“You were too far,” he whined, while grabbing your hand. He placed a quick peck against your knuckles and you smiled sheepishly at his affection.
Dick was always physically affectionate. He needed to have his hands on you at all times, the small of your back, your waist, your shoulders, he just needed to hold you. You often thought it was his way of grounding himself, especially when he was overwhelmed or overly excited.
You pushed yourself closer to him and gently rested your head on his shoulder. You eyed the mess on the table and that’s when you noticed the neglected plate of food. Your heart dropped.
“Oh my god, you didn’t eat,” you exclaimed, moving your head away from him. You were quick to get up, ready to reheat the meal for him, but he grabbed your wrist before you could leave.
“Sit,” he said and you did.
“But-”
“It’s okay, I’m not hungry,” the worried look in your eyes pulled at his heart strings, and he spoke up again, “I’ll have a big breakfast in the morning.”
“Promise,” you asked, holding out your pinky. You wanted to ask him to eat right then and there, but you knew it was no use. He was stubborn and worked up over the case files, food was the last thing on his mind.
“Promise,” Dick said, connecting his own pinky with yours, he placed a quick kiss against your lips to seal the deal.
“Will you come to bed soon,” you asked and he nodded in response. “Okay, I’ll wait until you’re ready then.” Dick smiled with his heart full and his eyes heavy.
Dick was loved by many, adored even, but no one made him feel the way that you did. No one cared for him like you did.
“Alright, let’s go to sleep now,” he said abruptly, closing his pen with its cap. He stared at the mess of papers on the table and decided that it was a problem for the morning.
“But I thought you had more work to do” you questioned. He didn’t answer and instead lifted you in his arms, the action caught you off gaurd. It was always likes this with him, he was unpredictable, but comforting. You knew you were always safe with him.
You placed your arms around his shoulders and he held you bridal style up the stairs. You laughed at his antics while ruffling his messy brunette locks. He grinned and repeatedly kissed your cheek, enticing more giggles from you.
“Let’s get my baby back to bed,” he said softly before kissing your cheek one last time. Dick opened the bedroom door with his foot and placed you gently against the pale blue sheets.
He walked over to his side of the bed and stretched before laying down next to you. Once he got comfortable, you moved closer and placed your head on his bare chest. Your fingers instinctively wrapped themselves on to the small locket around his neck. He wore your initials. That too, with pride.
You traced the charm with your index finger and Dick let out a deep, exasperated sigh. He ran his hands through your hair. His fingers grazed your scalp and you hummed delightfully.
The moment was intimate and calming. It made your body feel limp with an overwhelming amount of comfort and it slowly lulled you to sleep.
Once Dick felt your soft, rhythmic breathing, he kissed your forehead before muttering a small “goodnight, doll,” and then, he finally let himself get the well needed rest.
#crying he’s so cute#gn!reader#dick grayson#dick grayson x reader#dick grayson imagine#dick grayson headcanon#nightwing#nightwing x reader#nightwing imagine#nightwing headcanon#batfam
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Katara and the “Mom Friend” Trope
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Both in-universe and among fans, Katara has always been identified as the “mom friend.” While often used as a joke, the trope does reveal a deeper and more tragic aspect of Katara’s character: the way the war has forced her to grow up quickly and take on a parental role at a young age.
This is a frequently misunderstood part of Katara’s character, despite it being central to her arc. Since the show first aired, Katara has been the butt of many jokes and has always been one of the most hated characters by fans. From tasteless jokes about how she talks about the loss of her mother too much to accusations of being too emotional and bossy, Katara’s character has always been under attack by fans.
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In past years, and still in certain parts of the internet, this behavior was blatant, but lately I’ve noticed a more subtle spin on this. As it becomes slightly less socially acceptable to say blatantly misogynistic things about female characters—particularly here on tumblr—I’ve noticed fans express the same negative sentiments about Katara, but dressed up to appear more progressive. The most common way I see this sentiment expressed is fans downplaying Katara’s role as “team mom” and trying to make it seem as if Katara is less mature and responsible than she really is.
Of course, these individuals would have you believe that their reasoning for these opinions is that they really care so much about Katara and want to “let her be a kid.” But in reality, when you ignore the way that Katara is forced into a parental role in canon, you also ignore and disregard the context for many of her character traits, leading into the accusations of her being bossy and overly emotional that I mentioned earlier. It erases, and therefore minimizes, a huge source of stress and trauma that weighs on Katara throughout the series.
The idea that Katara fans created the concept of her being a “mom friend” is ridiculous. This is mentioned so much in canon that it’s practically a running joke. Toph accuses Katara of acting like everyone’s mom in The Chase. A similar conflict arises again in The Runaway, when Sokka even admits that he thinks of Katara as a mother figure, despite him being her older brother.
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Katara seems pretty hurt by this too, and it’s still never properly addressed again.
In The Headband, Katara actually pretends to be Aang’s mother.
And looking at everything we know about Katara, it’s very clear how she assumed this role. Think about what she says in the exposition of the entire show:
Katara: Ever since mom died, I've been doing all the work around camp while you've been off playing soldier! I even wash all the clothes! Have you ever smelled your dirty socks?
The moment Katara is introduced, the audience is given a critical piece of information about Katara—that she’s lost her mother and essentially assumed her role. While Sokka is more or less playing and occasionally hunting (we hardly ever see him do this in canon by the way), Katara is doing the overlooked, underappreciated labor that keeps everything moving. There is a great post here by @theotterpenguin that details this and the inherent misogyny in devaluing the kind of work Katara does, and how many fans tend to do this.
This trend continues throughout the course of the show. Katara is always the voice of reason who keeps things moving. She reigns in Sokka and Aang, who are constantly getting themselves into trouble.
There are countless examples, but to name a few:
As early as The Warriors of Kyoshi, she’s trying to get Aang to behave and not endanger himself to look cool. And having him mouth off when she gently suggests that he help with a minor chore.
In The Storm, Katara warns Sokka not to take a risky job, which he ignores and nearly gets himself killed.
In The Blue Spirit, Katara is trying the whole time to do something productive via Momo, remaining vigilant despite the sickness wearing her down.
In The Chase, being the one to politely ask Toph to help out, and honestly doing a pretty good job of keeping her cool as long as she did.
The entirety of The Desert episode. While everyone else was drugged up, hopeless, and even outright hostile, Katara kept everything moving and saved everyone’s lives.
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Whenever Aang goes into the Avatar State, it’s always Katara tasked with calming him down, despite how dangerous and volatile the Avatar State is when not properly controlled.
Additionally, there are so many small details that add to this picture. Katara is always the one we see getting food, preparing food, doing chores, everything of that nature. Everyone else would be completely lost without her.
And sadly, this is something never properly addressed by the narrative nor acknowledged by fans. There is a great post here by @ecoterrorist-katara explaining the tragedy in this. Katara is constantly burdened with the responsibility of keeping everything moving and doing the invisible labor that is never appreciated but keeps everyone moving, which is the reason why she’s viewed as being in a maternal role. Because that’s what she very clearly is to her friends.
This really wasn’t meant to be a ship related post, but it is kind of the elephant in the room here. I know a lot of the motivation in downplaying Katara’s “mom friend” role stems from shipping discourse, in particular, the hatred of the idea of Katara and Zuko acting as team parents. Some people associate Momtara as a Zutara trope and as a result, relentlessly bash it as they do anything even tangentially related to Zutara. But did you ever consider why it’s a Zutara trope? Because a lot of fans recognize everything I mentioned previously, and enjoy the idea of someone helping to share that responsibility. Sokka, Aang, and Toph clearly didn’t, so that leaves…guess who.
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Zuko: You should get some rest. We'll be there in a few hours. You'll need all your strength.
It’s tiring seeing this trend from people who clearly don’t care about Katara or her character. Sure, you might try to act like you’re downplaying Katara’s maternal role and how a huge part of her canon character was the war forcing her to assume that role out of “wanting her to be a kid” but you really aren’t that different from more blatantly misogynistic fans who call her immature and annoying. You don’t recognize or respect the work she’s constantly putting in to protect those around her, and then you have the audacity to get mad at fans of Katara who actually like the idea of someone taking some of that burden off of her shoulders?
Same Katara hate, different font. She is forced into this material role, and refusing to acknowledge this is disrespectful not just to Katara’s character, but all the real life women and girls forced into similar roles who see themselves in Katara.
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Happy late Valentine's day!! could you write for Shadow x reader and they're already in an established relationship but reader is still new to relationships and is also REALLY touchstarved? Have a good day/night!
" LEARNING TO BE LOVED " ── shadow x gn!reader
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so like, reader is me fr 🫶🏻 no warnings, i think, very detailed ── maybe too detailed 💀 but i love shadow, i love this concept, so im not complaining 💗 plz enjoy!!
pairing: shadow x reader
genre: fluff, hurt/comfort
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Being with Shadow was the best thing that had ever happened to you. But even after months of dating, you still struggled with certain aspects of your relationship—mainly, touch.
It wasn’t that you didn’t want to be close to him. In fact, you craved it. Your entire body longed for warmth, for comfort, for the feeling of being held. But years of going without it had made you hesitant, unsure. The idea of simply taking what you wanted felt foreign, like it was something you hadn’t quite earned.
Shadow had never pressured you. He wasn’t overly affectionate himself, but he was perceptive, and you knew he noticed your hesitations. He always let you take the lead when it came to touch, but that was part of the problem—you didn’t know how to take the lead. You didn’t know how to ask.
Tonight, you were curled up on the couch beside him, a movie playing in the background, though neither of you were truly watching it. The flickering screen cast dim light over the room, making the atmosphere feel warmer, softer. Shadow sat beside you, his usual rigid posture slightly relaxed as he rested one arm on the back of the couch.
Your fingers twitched slightly in your lap, a silent war waging in your mind. You wanted to lean against him. You wanted to feel his warmth. But every time you worked up the courage, doubt would creep in.
Would he think you were being needy? Would he get annoyed?
“…Something wrong?”
Shadow’s voice broke the silence, his tone low but not unkind. You looked up at him, startled. His crimson eyes were focused on you, analyzing, waiting.
“I…” You hesitated, your fingers gripping the hem of your sleeve. “No. I just…”
Shadow’s eyes flicked downward, catching the way your hands clenched. He was silent for a moment before exhaling softly.
“You don’t have to ask,” he said simply.
Your breath caught in your throat.
“I can tell you want something,” he continued. “If you need… anything, just say it.”
His voice was calm, patient—so utterly Shadow. The words were simple, but to you, they felt like permission. Like a safety net.
Swallowing hard, you hesitantly inched closer, pressing against his side. You half-expected him to tense up or pull away, but he didn’t. Instead, he adjusted ever so slightly, allowing you to settle comfortably against him. Your heart pounded as you carefully rested your head against his shoulder, his fur soft and warm against your cheek.
And then, slowly—hesitantly—Shadow lifted his arm from the couch and wrapped it around you.
The moment his hand settled against your back, something inside you cracked.
Warmth spread through your chest, overwhelming in its gentleness. You had spent so long aching for this kind of comfort, and now that you had it, it almost felt unreal. Your throat tightened, and before you could stop yourself, you squeezed your eyes shut and gripped the fabric of Shadow’s furred chest, as if afraid he might disappear.
His arm tightened around you in response. Not enough to smother, but enough to ground you.
A shaky breath escaped you.
“…Thank you,” you whispered, barely able to get the words out.
Shadow didn’t reply right away. He didn’t need to. Instead, his hand moved in slow, careful strokes along your back, his touch firm yet cautious—like he was trying to memorize you just as much as you were memorizing him.
“You don’t have to thank me,” he finally murmured. “You deserve this.”
Your breath hitched.
You had never thought about it that way before. You had always felt like affection was something you had to earn—something fragile that could be taken away if you weren’t careful. But here Shadow was, holding you like it was the most natural thing in the world.
Like you deserved to be held.
The weight of that realization made your eyes sting, and before you could stop yourself, you nuzzled further into his chest. Shadow let out a small breath—something between a sigh and a chuckle—but he didn’t pull away. If anything, he held you closer.
Neither of you spoke after that. You didn’t need to.
Because in that moment, wrapped in Shadow’s warmth, you finally felt safe.
And for once, you let yourself believe you were worthy of it.
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RAAAHHHH IM GOING MENTAL
#shadow the hedgehog#sonic the hedgehog#sonic x reader#shadow x reader#shadow the hedgehog x reader#sonic x shadow generations#shadow the ultimate lifeform#shadow dark beginnings#x reader#fluff#headcanons#oneshots#comfort#sonic fandom#female reader#male reader#gn reader#my writing
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Aventurine - lazy morning.
Hello, this is a short and sweet Aventurine is in bed with reader fic. Fairly basic, with a focus on the intimacy of a long term relationship and how a couple might handle being both touch starved and touch averse at times. It's not super deep but does make mention of those topics.
No angst other than mentions of difficulties early on in the relationship. But it isn't detailed in the slightest so is barely worth mentioning.
That's all for now. I hope you enjoy 💙
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Subtle warmth, soft snores, light tickling from hair and arms draped loosely over your waist. It isn't overly often that you get to wake up like this.
Your lover typically wakes before you and, if the night was intense, he'd be making you breakfast rather than cuddling you, wanting to make sure you were well taken care of. Your lover also wasn't a huge fan of too much physical touch outside of more intimate moments. However, there were times where it was almost as if he were making up for lost time in that department.
In his 'sleep', though you're pretty sure he is actually awake, as he runs his hands over your stomach and chest, playing with the skin softly.
"Aventurine.." silence.
"Aviiii... Turin..." more silence.
"Hmm, oh well, if he's asleep I'm sure he won't miss me." You felt his hand twitch against your side, almost tickling you. Other than that, silence.
You let out a loud dramatic sigh. "I guess I'll hang out with Veritas then. He'd be more entertaining company than a sleeping lump anyway."
Suddenly the arms wrapped around your waist as tightly as they could and Aventurine pushed his face into your neck and grumbled. "No, stay."
"Ah. Avi you're awake."
"I am now. You are so cruel you know. Your loving boyfriend is here cuddling you and you think hanging out with the universe's stiffest man, would be more fun." You felt him pout against your neck and you could almost feel his urge to nibble being held back by a thread.
"So you heard all that, did you? Hmm? I thought you'd only just woken up?"
This time he does nibble your neck causing you to giggle at the ticklishness of the almost featherlight bites.
"Hmph" He begins dramatically. "So rude, questioning the love of your life. Maybe I should hang out with Ratio today rather than you." He continues to nibble your neck slightly harder this time.
"Ka-kakavasha- Hey- Stop that." You say in-between giggles and stolen breaths. He stops due to his weakness being exploited.
He sighs pleasantly and squeezes you, and after one final bite he removes his teeth from your neck and grins against it. Like he got what he wanted after all.
"That's much better dear." He whispers into your skin. "Much much better."
You twist in his grasp until you're facing him. He pouts initially but his face brightens again when he sees your smiling face.
"Kakavasha,-" The look on his face whenever you called him by his birth name could start and end wars in your eyes. The subtle blush, the shy smile, the tinge of pink on his cheeks. Gorgeous. "-you cheeky man. You were planning this weren't you."
"I'd never deceive you."
All you can do is raise an eyebrow in response to that statement.
"Alright, I'd never deceive you in a way that hurts you. That better?"
"A little." You say before lightly pinching his nose with a playful pout.
He laughs and squeezes you closer, burying your head in his neck this time. You know that this means he can't handle looking at your face without his heart imploding with love. He'd told you as much when sleep deprived and slightly drunk after a work do. You'd never tell, you value the information too highly.
Silence falls again while you both comfortably indulge in each other's softness and warmth. "You know...?" You begin, feeling the urge to be cheeky swell in your chest.
"Know what?" He asks with a tilt of his head questioningly.
"I want to bite you." You bluntly state, an entirely too serious expression on your face.
His response was flat and unsurprised but you could see a glimmer of playfulness not so hidden within. "Ah."
"Yea" You respond just as bluntly and with faux seriousness, trying to conceal your laughter..
He hesitates, drawing out his consideration, keeping on the edge of anticipation. The corner of his mouth tilts up before he responds slowly. "Once.."
You raise your eyebrow questioningly, trying to conceal your excitement "Oh?" You ask simply, wanting to make sure for certain he wanted you to go ahead with your desire to bite.
"Once, and I'll let you do it hard." He agrees, putting one finger up clearly emphasising the 'once'.
An excited look that gains a chuckle from him lights up your face. "Oh! Really?" You exclaim, pleasantly surprised.
"Really." He affirms, tilting his head and moving his hair, looking entirely like a pretty boy at the mercy of a vampire.
You let out a light giggle, move your face over his shoulder, your entire body braced on his chest as he lays back in the bed. You open your mouth, feeling him shiver under you as your warm breath tickles his neck, and then... Chomp.
"Ah!" He tosses his head back and lets out a loud and clearly exaggerated moan that devolves into laughter at your offended and flustered expression.
You pull away feeling pouty and flustered "Hey! Don't ruin my fun.." You all but whine playfully.
Both of you descended into loud peals of laughter, clutching each other and holding tight.
"Seriously pretty, you've got to have known I was going to do that."
"Well- I- you..." You sigh, glaring at him without any actual anger or upset. "In hindsight yea..." You concede scrunching your face in defeat.
He chuckles again, the sound softening you against your will. "Come on pretty, after all that fun I'd say we deserve some breakfast." He reaches to pull your hair gently from your shoulders, deliberately brushing his fingertips against your skin, grinning at the shiver you let out.
Though you knew by the way he pulled away that he was done with touch for now. He'd had his fill and couldn't take any more. You smile at him though, not an ounce of insecurity crossing your mind, this is just how he was and you knew enough about him to know why.
When he needed or wanted affection he'd let you know, and was always so attentive to your needs and wants and would never push his desires on you. It had taken a lot of effort alot of opening up and being honest and a lot of arguments to get to this effortless state of understanding between you two. But it was so worth it.
Things were looking up for the both of you.
And maybe, a life like this was worth living.
💙-💙-💙-💙-💙-💙-💙-💙-💙-💙-💙-💙-💙-💙
#hsr x reader#honkai star rail x reader#hsr aventurine#aventurine honkai star rail#aventurine x reader#aventurine hsr x reader
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hello author! your works gives me so much comfort. i would like to suggest something how lads would handle if you have dysautonomia which happened to faint during random events.
Zayne is of course best equipped to deal with your condition. He doesn't treat you like a fragile doll or anything but he does become very aware of your responses and how you seem to be. He wants details about your condition, making sure he can catch you or guide you to a safe spot if you're having a fainting episode.
If the two of you are going to have a longer day together he'll give you quick check ins once in a while just to make sure you're feeling alright. He'd hate for you to suddenly feel an episode coming on in a place that's going to be difficult for him to care for you until you wake up. It might be a little overbearing but you know he's doing it for your wellbeing and a genuine concern.
Xavier panics a little whenever you faint of course but he does get used to it over time. He starts to take note of your symptoms, trying to see if he can figure out when you're going to faint so he can catch you. Whenever you do faint he'll carry you to somewhere else to rest, letting you rest your head in his lap as he waits for you to wake up.
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Rafayel hates not being able to do anything. He'll ask you tons of questions about your condition, trying to understand everything about it so he can try and prevent it. He knows that technically, there's really nothing he can do but in his head, helping you would mean making it so you don't feel the affects of your condition. He's a little overly cautious, something that might irritate you. You'd have to talk to him about what you want him to do and how you want him to treat you if you don't want him to be that way.
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Sylus doesn't seem to act any differently after you tell him about your condition. He doesn't want you to think that he's treating you any differently but he is paying attention to every little detail about you. If the slightest thing seems off he'll pull you to his side, asking if you'd like to sit down or if the two of you should head home. If you express any sort of discomfort he's immediately with you, gauging your reaction and asking what you need from him.
#love and deepspace x reader#l&ds x reader#lads x reader#zayne x reader#l&ds zayne x reader#lads zayne x reader#l&ds xavier x reader#lads xavier x reader#l&ds rafayel x reader#lads rafayel x reader#l&ds sylus x reader#lads sylus x reader
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How to Recognize a Good Communicator
In online dating, identifying a good communicator is important to finding a meaningful connection. Here are some specific traits and behaviors to look out for:
1. They show genuine interest
A good communicator doesn't just talk about themselves—they're curious about you. For example, if you mention that you like something, they'll follow up with a response that builds on your likes instead of jumping over your topic and starting a new one.
2. They Listen and Respond Thoughtfully
Thoughtful replies are a strong sign of an engaged communicator. If you share a story about a recent trip or a favorite memory, they'll build on it, like saying, “That sounds like such a peaceful getaway. Do you travel often, or was this a special occasion?” This creates a dialogue rather than just a series of questions and answers.
3. They Balance Sharing and Listening
A good communicator knows how to keep the conversation balanced. They'll share their experiences and perspectives but also create space for you to speak. For example, they might say, “I've always loved gardening—it's such a relaxing hobby. Do you enjoy spending time outdoors too?” This invites a two-way exchange, making the conversation feel natural and engaging.
4. They Remember Details
When someone recalls small things you've mentioned before, it's a clear sign they're paying attention. For instance, if you told them you were planning a family gathering, they might ask, “How did your family get-together go?” This kind of attentiveness helps you feel valued and appreciated.
5. They Respect Boundaries
A great communicator understands that building trust takes time. They won't push for personal information or try to rush the conversation into overly serious territory. Instead, they'll let things unfold at a pace that feels comfortable for both of you.
By looking for these signs, you can identify communicators who prioritize quality over quantity, helping you focus on building meaningful connections with those who truly value thoughtful and engaging conversations.
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#sexy granny#mature woman#olderwomen#mature beauty#mature lady#mature mom#curvy mature#cougar#granny#sexy gilf
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*Saturn Natal Aspect Snippets*
Sun Trine Saturn: Likely a persistent, disciplined, hardworking, and reliable individual. They tend to easily earn the trust of others. They may have good luck with networking or having a positive reputation. But they can be overly cautious to where they stifle spontaneity and creativity. They can also have a judgmental side.
Sun Opposite Saturn: Can struggle with self-doubt and may feel frequently restricted throughout life or may self-impose limitations, especially once they are older. Can struggle to have close relationships with authority figures, maybe parents, or teachers. Finds it difficult to tap into creativity or go after their desires, being pulled away or stifled by obligations. Can have a lot of inner strength and their ambition can be their guide and light.
Sun Square Saturn: May find frustration when trying to express themselves, could easily feel misunderstood. Is associated with low self-esteem, a feeling of bad luck, or a feeling of heaviness or burdens. Can be a very persevering individual who works hard and when/if they develop more confidence plays hard too. Discipline balanced with creativity or warmth and generosity can make them into a very insightful and encouraging person.
Moon Trine Saturn: May be stable, mature, and highly responsible. May have grown up faster than others in their life but took this with grace and reap benefits from it. But could look down on their softer side. Can be self-critical. May have a lot of emotional reserve and inhibition. Will still have to heal or face their fast-lane maturity as an adult. Ultimately this is a harmonious and comfortable aspect boosting practicality, patience, and self-respect.
Moon Opposite Saturn: Can come off or act emotionally distant, always finding it hard to express their feelings and love. Has a huge fear or rejection or being judged. Can easily feel misunderstood. But is highly logical, calm, and has their life and self under control.
Moon Square Saturn: Was certainly forced to grow up too quick and may deal with many challenges in life due to this, especially emotionally. Can have a lot of self-doubt. May struggle with isolation at times. May be overly private and hates to ask others for help. They are reliable and they desire close and supportive bonds. Even with their struggles they will put in the work in relationships.
Mercury Trine Saturn: A logical and structured individual. This aspect fosters reliable and precise communication skills, making it easier to convey ideas and earn trust through thoughtful and well-organized expression. May be overly serious or practical. Can struggle with innovation or imagination. Could be closed-minded or stubborn in their opinions. Saturn puts walls around fast-moving and flexible Mercury. Many times with a trine this is expressed as a supportive influence, but it can still sometimes jail one's spirit.
Mercury Opposite Saturn: Can easily feel misunderstood or criticized. Might jump to assumptions easily. Can be highly self-critical or have a harsh inner voice. But may be highly intelligent and do well under pressure.
Mercury Square Saturn: This aspect can lead to mental blockages and difficulties in communication. Can struggle with confidence especially in terms of communication or intellect. They might struggle to tap into their creativity or flexibility. Can be very detail-oriented and pragmatic in their thinking. Becoming disciplined in how they learn or pursue knowledge and academics is very useful when dealing with this aspect.
Venus Trine Saturn: Encourages a realistic approach to love, with a focus on long-term goals and responsible choices. It's beneficial for building enduring relationships and finding structure in creative or financial pursuits. Not being honest with oneself and/or falling into being around those who do not share your values or goals can be a challenge.
Venus Opposite Saturn: It can be difficult to express romantic feelings and accept love, gratitude, or generosity. Can easily feel lonely, isolated, or negative in their relationships. May need more reassurance than they are willing to admit.
Venus Square Saturn: May have challenges in establishing stability and commitment in relationships. Saturn's restraint and seriousness can clash with Venus's desire for warmth and affection. This square makes it hard to fulfill emotional needs in relationships. Expressing wants and needs more is vital.
Mars Trine Saturn: This aspect promotes disciplined action and sustained effort, allowing individuals to work diligently towards their goals with patience and persistence. Can be very ambitious and strategic in life. But being overly cautious or rigid can be a challenge for this more comfortable aspect.
Mars Opposite Saturn: Can be highly impatient and easily irritable towards their willpower and ambitions. They may feel like they can never reach their goals. Could struggle to balance caution with action or assertiveness. May easily get into conflict with authority. But their determination may outweigh other Saturn aspects. 💪 Discipline and patience can be their friend as they grow.
Mars Square Saturn: Can struggle to assert one's self. Can easily get discouraged from their goals. They need to work harder to get in touch with their ambitions. It may be that their ambitions are not accepted or supported somehow. But can be a very hard worker. Independence, finding those who can support or help them in their goals, and embracing a potential cautious or patient nature can be helpful.
Jupiter Trine Saturn: This individual learns their lessons quickly. They may have a good balance of optimism and skepticism. Can have a strong work ethic or healthy amount of ambition. Known as a favorable position for finances or going after your goals. May have good relationships with authority figures or becomes an authority figure themselves quickly or early in life. May struggle with impatience at times or favoring discipline over impulsiveness or vice versa to an unpredictable extreme.
Jupiter Opposite Saturn: Stuck on a rollercoaster of high optimism and low pessimism. Can run into a lot of frustrations or delays in their plans for life. Can easily overexert themselves and face burn out. Associated with both financial struggles and success, is commonly cited as a position that goes through booms and busts throughout their career. Learning strategic long-term planning can help them cope with these struggles. Relying on practicality and discipline can be very useful for these individuals. Battling self-doubt is common, they can have big dreams but must KEEP GOING to achieve them.
Jupiter Square Saturn: May struggle with a lack of responsibility or discipline. Can experience push-pull dynamics where they feel caught between their aspirations and the practical realities. Can be conflicted between their desires and a need for freedom. However when they win in life, they tend to win big.
Saturn Trine Uranus: This aspect combines innovation with practicality, allowing individuals to implement original ideas and progressive changes in a structured and sustainable way. May have good luck with technology, abstract ideas or theories, and thinking or doing things outside of the box. Even though this aspect is harmonious, conflict between old vs. new can still exist within them. Tradition vs. the nonconventional, sustaining vs. change, order vs. chaos can still happen when these two planets interact.
Saturn Opposite Uranus: A need for freedom and frequent change and a need for predictability and stability may haunt them. They can have conflicting desires and expectations with who they are in their society and what they want out of society. May find it hard to commit to long-term plans or goals. Life may seem unstable for them often. They can be highly adaptable, enduring, and enlighten individuals as they grow.
Saturn Square Uranus: Can swing back and forth from being highly rebellious to a rule follower. Can be resistant to change but have a disdain or fear of stagnation, causing internal conflicts. Can equally fear and be fascinated by the unknown. This placement can pave the way for understanding structures and systems in their life or society and how to break free of them. Has a great desire for liberation and inner authority.
Saturn Trine Neptune: This aspect allows people to balance practicality with imagination. This is the artist who is business savvy. This aspect can also make one highly compassionate and purposeful in their giving and actions. They may have a strong drive to join a career of healing or helping others. Or they may be part of charities and nonprofits. However they need to be careful of being around controlling and restrictive environments. This can stunt their growth and happiness.
Saturn Opposite Neptune: This aspect can create confusion and tension between idealism and practicality, leading to feelings of disillusionment or uncertainty when reality does not align with dreams and expectations. Without grounding they can fall into vicious cycles of disappointment. But they can be highly compassionate and empathetic. With a grounding influence they can be a responsible healer or spiritual leader.
Saturn Square Neptune: Conflicts between the spiritual and tangible side of self and life can cause them frustration. May struggle with getting in touch with their spiritual side OR their more logical, down-to-earth side. But they may master introspective skills and become highly enlightened as they grow/mature.
Saturn Trine Pluto: Makes individuals perceptive, hardworking, diligent, strong, and determined. We have two powerful planets working together. Pluto brings depth, destruction, healing, transformation, empowerment. Saturn brings wisdom, maturity, strategy, lessons, and realism. They can be blessed with self-mastery and a strong, effective willpower. But they may be overly serious, negative, or controlling, and easily stressed.
Saturn Opposite Pluto: May struggle with inner power struggles. They may swing from intense confidence to crippling anxiety or self-doubt. Can easily feel overwhelmed or restricted by responsibilities and limitations, resulting in periods of frustration and potential burnout. These individuals will likely experience many profound transformations in their life. Introspection and honing their intuition will be helpful to them.
Saturn Square Pluto: May feel like they never have enough control or power over their life. Leaving their comfort zone, sticking to discipline or a routine, inner authority, independence, and ultimately empowerment may seem extra hard for them. But they can learn to be resourceful, perceptive, and enduring over time. They may find empowerment in unexpected ways.
#planets#zodiac#astrology#saturn#aspects#natal chart#sun#venus#mercury#mars#jupiter#uranus#pluto#neptune
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⋆。°✩ kisses with txt
includes: tooth rotting fluff, reader is a mau (yeonjun), mentions of burnout (soobin), sickfic (taehyun)
a/n: thinking about writing for nct dream if anyone is interested lol
likes, comments, reblogs, and feedback are always appreciated <33
gn reader (no pronouns used)
⋆。°✩ yeonjun - neck kisses
yeonjun’s gaze remains fixated on you as you hesitantly lean in to brush yet another layer of foundation across his smooth skin. your movements are overly cautious as you brush a final shine against his plump lips before pulling back with a satisfied smile.
“okay, i’m done.”
yeonjun turns to face the mirror beside him, scanning each detail for a few seconds before he hums. “it looks incredible. you did a great job.”
“do you need anything-”
“txt, you’re on in five!” a stage-hand’s voice interrupts. you startle slightly at the intrusion before returning your attention back to the man before you.
“what about a good-luck kiss?” he teases. the small smirk on his face quickly disappears when you begin to lean in - this time with no makeup brush in hand. shivers rack up yeonjun’s spine when your lips brush against the skin of his neck. his cheeks flush furiously underneath the layers of foundation coating his skin; wide eyes meeting your own once again.
your touch is gone just as quick it was there. “sorry,” you sheepishly smile. “i didn’t want to ruin your makeup.”
“don’t be,” yeonjun chuckles. “i liked it.”
⋆。°✩ soobin - cheek kisses
a long sigh escapes soobin’s lips as he stumbles into your shared apartment; tiredly kicking his shoes off beside the door. his feet drag against the floor as he retraces a familiar route into your living room before all but collapsing onto the couch.
metal digs uncomfortably into his sides, though the pain barely compares to his pounding headache. soobin squeezes his eyes shut as he hides his face into the cushions in an attempt to escape from the toll of a yet another demanding workday.
“soob?” you ask, quietly making your way into the room. he simply groans in response as your footsteps slowly become closer. you kneel down beside him, reaching up to rest a gentle hand against his back. “long day?”
soobin twists his body to the side so he’s facing you. a sympathetic smile tugs at the corners of your lips. “i’m so tired,” he sleepily mumbles. “rehearsals ran late today. we barely got any breaks.”
“i’m sorry, jagi.” you lean in to press a fleeting kiss against his cheek. “why don’t we go lay down? i’ll play with your hair and you can take a nap.”
soobin smiles at the suggestion, nodding slightly. “i’d like that a lot.”
⋆。°✩ beomgyu - nose kisses
you all but jump into beomgyu’s arms, tightly wrapping your arms around his shoulders. his hands almost instinctively fall to around your waist as he eagerly tugs your body closer until you’re fully leaning against his chest.
you squeeze your eyes shut as if to savor the moment, leaning in so you can hear his heartbeat. “i missed you,” you murmur. “so, so much.”
“i missed you too,” beomgyu whispers.
you step back slightly to look at him, bringing your hands up to cup his face. you brush your thumb against his rosy cheeks before resting your palms against his flushed cheeks. a comfortable silence falls between you. a soft smile threatens to tug at the corners of your lips as you study beomgyu’s features.
his own gaze remains fixed on your lips as you lean in, pressing a soft kiss against the tip of his nose. “y/n,” he whines.
“i’m sorry gyu,” you chuckle. butterflies swarm in your stomach in anticipation. you smirk softly as he unconsciously leans in once again, chasing after your lips. “you’re just too cute to resist,” you whisper just before beomgyu catches your lips against his in a sweet kiss.
⋆。°✩ taehyun - jawline kisses
a groan leaves your lips as yet another coughing fit racks through you. your hands shake and your head pounds with a slowly approaching migraine.
taehyun reaches over to rub a comforting hand against your back. “are you okay?” he whisper; eyebrows furrowed in concern.
your answer comes in the form of a pained moan leaving your lips. you squeeze your eyes shut in an attempt to focus on anything but the sickness slowly debilitating your body. “can i get you anything?” taehyun asks, still rubbing a hand against your back.
“cuddles?” you whisper, wincing at the way your voice cracks.
“come here, jagi,” he says, opening his arms. you don’t waste any time; eagerly shuffling across the couch.
taehyun softly smiles down at you as you lean in so your head is pressed against his chest. he wraps his arms around your waist, slipping a hand underneath your loose t-shirt to rest against your overly warm skin.
the soundtrack of the drama you had turned on earlier fades into the background. you lean upwards to press a chaste kiss against his jawline before nuzzling yourself closer against his chest. “i love you,” you murmur.
taehyun smiles as he tucks his chin on top of your head. “i love you too.”
⋆。°✩ huening kai - forehead kisses
kai sleepily curls his body further into your warmth as he shifts slightly so his head is resting on top of your chest. his arm remains wrapped around your waist, all but trapping you between his body and your bed.
your lips unconsciously curl into a soft smile as kai nuzzles himself even closer against you. he looks so content in his sleep - disheveled hair framing his relaxed features; his lips curled into a small smile; an arm loosely draped over your body. stray strands of his curled hair occasionally brush against the bare skin of your neck, sending ticklish shivers down your spine.
your phone springing to life with the repetitive noise of your alarm breaks the serenity of the moment, forcefully breaking you out of your sleepy haze. a soft groan from kai vibrates against your chest as he squeezes his eyes shut a little tighter in a poor attempt to cling onto his remaining sleep.
you softly chuckle as you brush a hand up to push a stray strand of hair out of his face. “kai,” you murmur. “it’s time to get up.”
kai simply groans once again, hiding his face closer against your chest. “five more minutes.”
“okay jagi,” you hum, pressing a kiss against the crown of his forehead.
#txt fluff#txt soft hours#txt x reader#txt x male reader#txt reactions#txt scenarios#txt drabbles#soobin fluff#soobin x reader#soobin x male reader#yeonjun x reader#yeonjun x male reader#yeonjun fluff#beomgyu x reader#beomgyu x male reader#beomgyu fluff#taehyun x reader#taehyun x male reader#taehyun fluff#huening kai fluff#huening kai x reader#huening kai x male reader#txt one shot#txt scenario#txt drabble#txt fanfic#txt imagine#male reader#gn reader#fem reader
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Harry and Snape’s Clashing Communication Styles
It's interesting to think that Harry and Snape don’t have longer conversations in the series, but when they do, their communication styles are so different that they often clash.
Harry’s way of communicating is practical and straightforward. He tends to break down complex ideas into simpler terms that he can easily understand. This makes sense, given his upbringing in a non-magical world and his tendency to rely more on gut instinct than deep theoretical knowledge. For Harry, things are usually black and white, and his directness shows his desire to cut through the confusion and get straight to the point.
Snape, on the other hand, has a more complex and layered way of speaking. His language is precise and often sarcastic, which reflects not just his intelligence but also his disdain for what he sees as Harry’s lack of subtlety. Snape’s use of imagery and metaphor, especially when he describes consepts, gives his speech a poetic, almost philosophical quality. He takes pleasure in showing off his superior knowledge and uses this as a way to belittle Harry.
We see this clash clearly in OOTP during Harry’s first Occlumency lesson:
Snape looked back at him for a moment and then said contemptuously, “Surely even you could have worked that out by now, Potter? The Dark Lord is highly skilled at Legilimency —” “What’s that? Sir?” “It is the ability to extract feelings and memories from another person’s mind —” “He can read minds?” said Harry quickly, his worst fears confirmed. “You have no subtlety, Potter,” said Snape, his dark eyes glittering. “You do not understand fine distinctions. It is one of the shortcomings that makes you such a lamentable potion-maker.” Snape paused for a moment, apparently to savor the pleasure of insulting Harry, before continuing, “Only Muggles talk of ‘mind reading.’ The mind is not a book, to be opened at will and examined at leisure. Thoughts are not etched on the inside of skulls, to be perused by any invader. The mind is a complex and many-layered thing, Potter . . . or at least, most minds are. . . .” He smirked. Whatever Snape said, Legilimency sounded like mind reading to Harry and he did not like the sound of it at all.
For Harry, when Snape mentions Legilimency, it immediately sounds like “mind reading,” which is a reasonable but overly simple way to understand such a complex concept. His quick jump to this conclusion shows his need to make sense of something that feels threatening, but it also reveals his limited grasp of the deeper nuances.
Snape, however, can’t resist mocking Harry’s lack of subtlety. His response is laced with condescension as he insists on the complexity of the mind and dismisses the idea of “mind reading” as something only muggles would think of. Snape’s explanation is detailed and philosophical, contrasting sharply with Harry’s desire for a straightforward answer.
Another great example of their different communication styles comes in HBP when Snape puts Harry on the spot, asking him to explain the difference between an inferius and a ghost:
“Let us ask Potter how we would tell the difference between an Inferius and a ghost.” The whole class looked around at Harry, who hastily tried to recall what Dumbledore had told him the night that they had gone to visit Slughorn. “Er — well — ghosts are transparent —” he said. “Oh, very good,” interrupted Snape, his lip curling. “Yes, it is easy to see that nearly six years of magical education have not been wasted on you, Potter. ‘Ghosts are transparent.’ ” Harry took a deep breath and continued calmly, though his insides were boiling, “Yeah, ghosts are transparent, but Inferi are dead bodies, aren’t they? So they’d be solid —” “A five-year-old could have told us as much,” sneered Snape. “The Inferius is a corpse that has been reanimated by a Dark wizard’s spells. It is not alive, it is merely used like a puppet to do the wizard’s bidding. A ghost, as I trust that you are all aware by now, is the imprint of a departed soul left upon the earth . . . and of course, as Potter so wisely tells us, transparent.” “Well, what Harry said is the most useful if we’re trying to tell them apart!” said Ron. “When we come face-to-face with one down a dark alley, we’re going to be having a shufti to see if it’s solid, aren’t we, we’re not going to be asking, ‘Excuse me, are you the imprint of a departed soul?’
Once again, Harry demonstrates his practical and straightforward approach. He gives a simple, clear distinction based on what would be most useful in a real-life situation—whether the entity is solid or transparent. This shows how Harry tends to focus on what’s immediately relevant and actionable, and Ron’s defense of Harry’s answer highlights this practicality. Ron even points out that in a real-world scenario, Harry’s answer is actually the most helpful, contrasting it with Snape’s more academic approach.
Snape, though, dismisses Harry’s answer as too simplistic and mocks him for stating what he sees as the obvious. Snape’s communication is more about the theoretical and precise understanding of magical concepts. He emphasizes the deeper, more complex nature of an Inferius, which, while academically accurate, is less practical in the context that Harry is thinking of. Snape’s disdain shows that he values this deeper, nuanced understanding more than the direct, practical knowledge that Harry offers.
These moments really bring out the deeper divide between Harry and Snape. Harry approaches things with instinct and a straightforward mindset, while Snape is all about nuance, precision, and seeing the layers in everything. Because they see the world so differently, they struggle to communicate, which only adds to the distrust and misunderstanding between them—a tension that echoes throughout the entire series.
#I was originally going to post about that inferius scene from hbp and talk about how hilarious Snape’s burns are#but then I started thinking about how precise and poetic his communication style is and how it clashes with Harry’s.#So now here we are.#I hope I'm not being to repetitive here because it's 4 am and I'm tired#hp#hp meta#meta#character analysis#hp series#harry potter#severus snape#severus snape meta#Harry potter meta#communication styles#pro snape#professor snape#order of the phoenix#half blood prince#occlumency#anti snaters
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