#overalls hanging by one strap + no shoes + no shirt. not a phone in sight just people living in the moment

[fizzytoo]

his toes are out

[lilystyles]

comfort.

part three of the no strings attached series by @lilystyles

no strings attached masterlist & main masterlist xxx

authors note the long awaited part three!!! you guys are literally the best omg. all the love for both parts has been amazing since i'm so new to tumblr!! can't believe it :))) kisses and hugs, enjoy part three and follow me to see the other parts coming soon! sorry if this took some time, uni's kickin my ass.

brief description y/n calls harry drunk and scared, harry picks her up and helps take care of her. the next morning y/n worries she'll scare him off, but of course, harry eases those worries.

warnings! mentions of sex, swearing, and alcohol abuse, overall just a mature read. anxious girl reader moment (real). FLUFFY ASF!! around 4.5k words.

drunk!inexperienced!virgin!reader x fwb!harry

* * * * *

“Hello?” A crackly voice spoke into Harry’s phone.

The familiar voice of Y/n made his eyes snap open. It was an odd, long, 011 phone number; he was confused why her little contact wasn’t on his screen. It was this recent photo of her lying on a rug in just one of his shirts listening to records. He was still half asleep, all foggy and confused. Her call had woken him up from a deep slumber. He honestly thought he might have been dreaming for a moment, her voice was all distorted.

“Love, is that you?” His voice came out all deep and gravelly.

“Harry?! It’s Y/n!” He could hear noise in the background of her, her voice was warped and all crackly.

“Are you alright?” He said quickly sitting up from his bed, she never called on a random number. Something must be wrong. His knuckles rubbed along his eyes, trying to wake himself up. It was pitch black and freezing inside his room.

“My phone’s dead!! I’m at some club, you’re the only number I knew off by heart! Can you come to get me? I’m a bit scared and I’m stranded!” She was still shouting, he could hear people shouting and music in the background. She could hardly even hear her own voice over it all.

Harry looked at the time on his phone. It was around 1 AM. “I’m coming now, Y/n. Where are you?”

“Some place called The Swan!”

He had already slid some shoes on and began to race to his car. “I’m comin’ right now, I’m gettin’ in the car. Can yeh wait with one of tha’ bouncers or somethin’ until I’m there?”

“Good idea, H. Okay, see you soon. Drive safe please.” She sounded very drunk. The phone made a slamming noise when she ended the call, it must have been a pay phone.

Harry had to stop himself from speeding to get her. He tried to breathe. She was scared, and that unsettled him. He knew that she didn’t need protecting, but drunk women alone were vulnerable, he wished it wasn’t so but he couldn’t help but let his mind wander to awful scenarios.

The Swan was this really dodgy nightclub in a dodgy neighbourhood. For some reason, their friend Olive tended to favour it for the free drinks on Friday nights. She must’ve roped Y/n into going there tonight. Harry had gone to a business meeting that evening so they hadn’t been able to hang out, he’d called her to tell her. Y/n said that was okay and that she had plans anyway too. 

This must have been the plan. 

When his car arrived outside the strip of clubs he parked in a taxi zone, and quickly got out not caring whether or not he could park there. He looked around the swarms of people trying to find her familiar head of h/c hair. He was still in sleep clothes, this grey pair of shorts and a shirt that belonged to Y/n actually. It was this baggy old pink one with Spice Girls on the front it fits him more tightly than her. 

His shoes were slippers and socks and he had a hoodie over his head. When he got closer to the entrance he saw her. 

She was sitting on the floor beside two big burly bouncers. Her feet were bare and the heels she had on were in her hands. The dress she was wearing had ridden up a bit as she stared off into the distance, drunkenly. She hadn’t seemed to noticed her undies were on display or that her straps were falling down her shoulders. Her heels were off and she was sitting them in her lap.

“Y/n.” He said in relief, glad he’d made it here quickly enough. She was in a right state. 

She looked up, smiling all bleary-eyed. Her mouth was in a wide-open puppy dog grin.  “Harry!” Her arms lifted up for him.

He laughed feeling better now that he could see she was all okay, nothing had happened to her. He bent over slightly to pick her up into the hug that she was wanting. She dropped her shoes as he lifted her but she didn’t seem to care slinking her arms around his waist and leaning into him.

She squeezed him tightly. “Thanks for gettin’ me,”

“Of course, love. Am I really the only number y'knew off by heart?” He asked pulling back slightly to see her face.

She blushed looking down at her feet, all shy.

“Other than Mum.” She replied, finally meeting his eyes. Her Mum lived back home though, so Harry was the only person she had to call and truthfully the only one she wanted to call.

He smiled kissing her temple, brushing some hair away from her eyes. Her mascara was smudged and her lipstick had faded leaving her lips stained a slightly rosy colour, but she still looked beautiful.

“Don’t get cocky. It’s from all those times I’d call you in Uni to pick me up.” She replied, her words slurring slightly.

“Have you seen Y/n?” Asked Harry, in a gruff tone. 

Queenie, Y/n’s friend who’d invited her to the party, was smoking a joint quietly outside on the front porch of the university sharehouse.

“I think she’s inside, last I saw she was dancing on the kitchen table.” Said Queenie with a breathy laugh, blowing out a long cloud of thick white smoke. The potent smell hit Harry’s nose and he wished he was back home.

He just nodded, sighing. It was probably about 3 AM right now. He’d been asleep but their friend James called him up saying Y/n needed to be picked up and brought home. She was a bit out of control. 

Harry knew it was of roommately and best friendly duties to pick his girl up. She’d done it to him too, many times. And he did worry for her when she was out drinking, especially when he wasn’t there to watch out for her. Even in school when they’d get drunk off stolen alcohol in each other’s backyards he watched out for her always.

 James would always say it was because he was like a jealous boyfriend, but Harry denied that saying it was simply because she tended to end up passed out on the road without his watchful gaze.

When he got inside suddenly his pyjamas felt too hot even though it was a chilly night. There were many people swarming the house, he made his way to the kitchen saying hello groggily here and there to friends. 

When he got there he found Y/n dancing along to the beat of some awful song everyone knew the words to. Her hips were swaying and the exposed skin that her low-waisted jeans offered looked edible, she looked so good even with half a bottle of tequila in her. He fought away that thought and blamed his tired eyes.

Her cheeks were flushed from her drink and she had this toothy smile on her face.

“Y/n!” He called over the music, looking up at her on the table.

She opened her eyes looking down at him. “HARRY!!” 

He smiled, and suddenly waking up at three had been worth it, and coming to get her was no problem. “Hi, love!”

She made grabby hands at him. “Come on! Get up here! Dance with me!! I missed ya!”

How could he say no?

He didn’t say anything, he just let go of her to pick up her shoes from the ground.

Her arms were wrapped around her body like she was cold. 

“Are y’cold?”

She nodded her head. He quickly took off his zip-up hoodie and put it on her, zipping it up for her. He was rolling the sleeves for her because it was too big when her hand fell onto his chest gripping his (her) shirt.

“You’re a thief!” She teased. “Not my Spices Girls shirt, Harold!”

He just smiled, pushing some loose hair behind her ears. “S’cute! I think I look good in it. Don’t you?” 

He’d look good in a paper bag, but the real reason he wore it was that it smelt like her. The shampoo she used, her perfume, and that something that was just her natural aroma. He liked how worn it was, the soft feel of it, and how it had faded from so many years of sleeping in it. She wore it a lot when they were roommates too. But she’d had it since she was little. The once vibrant pink had paled to a babied pink hue.

Honestly, he’d been sad they couldn’t hang out that evening. He put it on to help him sleep.

“You always look good.” She rolled her eyes as if it was annoying. And sometimes it was, how did he look good in the old raggy-stained shirt? She would never know. Magic. He was bloody magic.

He started taking his slippers off. They were black slip-on ones. She frowned at him. “What are you doing?”

“Put them on. I don’t want yeh’ cutting yourself on tha’ glass.” He said softly. Her heels were still in his hands, looking dainty in them. 

She smiled softly before sliding her feet into the slippers. Her feet ached from those ridiculous shoes, she was glad to be rid of them. His sock-covered feet were on the floor. “What about you?”

“Don’t worry. I’ll be fine. Home?”

“Home.” She nodded. 

He made sure he had her purse too before opening the car door for her and placing the bag and shoes by her feet. She slid in and Harry even did her seatbelt up for her, before gently shutting the door. When he got in beside her she smiled, glad to be with Harry. She’d missed him, it had only been one day. But they had been inseparable at the minute.

His car smelt of tobacco, mint, and a spicy woodsy smell. Just like him. He had a vanilla-scented air freshener and a charm of jade beads hanging on the mirror. 

“Can I put some music on, H?” She asked turning to him. Her eyes stared up at him. He handed over his phone unlocked.

She opened Spotify and put on some Oasis. Hitting shuffle it landed on ‘Married With Children’ and she sighed. “Remember when we used to listen to Oasis at my house?” She asked. 

Growing up Y/n had the most CD variety and all the gang used to go over and listen; when Y/n’s parents were away they’d smoke and drink with this album on in the background. It always made Harry feel very nostalgic and it always reminded him of her. Even when they had drifted his hands itched to ring her if he ever heard it on the radio.

“Of course, you loved bloody Oasis.” He replied, smiling at the memory of 14-year-old Y/n. She had these colourful dresses, ratty sneakers, and an Oasis obsession. She just grinned over at him in reply, humming the words of the song. He could see that girl inside her even now, and Y/n could still see young Harry who was all dimples and laughs underneath the rockstar beside her.

“Yours or mine?” He asked gently as pulled up to a red light. 

“Yours, please. S’closer and I want your comfy bed.” She had been dreaming of his big grand bed, it was all white, fluffy, and fresh and it smelt of her Harry. She wanted to curl up in there, she’d been feeling a bit emotional recently. She thought her period might be coming soon. So all she wanted was to sleep in his arms and his very comfortable and luxurious bed.

And she liked when she woke up at his house and she’d find him sitting on the couch drinking his tea, as always he was awake before her, waiting for her with some pastries or big plates of bacon and eggs. It was like being in a bloody hotel!

He nodded, she looked so sleepy beside him. “As you wish.”

The drive was quick and quiet beside the low humming radio.

When the car pulled out the front of Harry’s large house he entered the security code into the gate and made his way inside the driveway. When he parked the car and turned off the engine, he looked over to find her very much asleep.

He sighed softly, letting himself take a moment to stare. Her eyes were shut, fluffy eyelashes on her cheeks, lips all pouty and soft. She looked so calm and soft like this, it made her look like an angel. An angel in clubbing clothes. He knew he wanted to get her inside and change her into something comfortable and get her safely to sleep, but he wanted to enjoy her beauty for a second.

“Bun,” He whispered his hand touching her cheek. She leaned into his touch, still asleep. “We’re home,” he said slightly louder. 

Her eyes fluttered open, and she just nodded. He got out and walked to her door, helping her out. He grabbed all her things, locked the car and then grabbed her hand to guide her inside. When they stepped inside Harry was glad to be home. 

He then guided her upstairs to the bathroom motioning for her to sit on the toilet. She did so happily and he opened his drawer grabbing some makeup remover and cotton pads, Y/n had a habit of falling asleep in her makeup so he’d bought this so she didn’t have to at his house. 

He soaked the cotton pad with the remover and stepped closer to her, pushing her chin up slightly. She smiled at him sleepily. 

He smiled back. It was silent, but they didn’t always need to talk. They’d never needed to talk all the time, that wasn’t their style. 

He gently pressed the cotton pad on her skin and removed all the makeup around her lips, cheeks, and forehead. It took a few cotton pads and then he finally did her eyes, she looked like a panda for a second and he giggled at her. 

Her hand had crept up onto his hip under the shirt, her nails gently scratched the skin there and she saw a peak of the fern tattoos. She loved those tattoos, they had to be her favourite. When she’d pleasure him she loved kissing along those tattoos and when they cuddled on his couch and her head was on his lap she would trace along them. They were just fucking so sexy.

He liked her tattoo too. He was just as obsessed with every inch of her, but he loved that she had gotten it with him in mind. He felt they’d always be connected till the end of time.

Once he had gotten all her makeup off her, he used a wet cloth to wash her face. She felt nice and clean. Harry knew just how to take care of her. He handed her a hairbrush she left here and she quickly brushed her hair before tying it back away from her clean face. 

“Y’want your shirt back to sleep in?” He asked pinching the pink material. 

She shook her head. She had started to sober up, but she was still looking sleepy, “Looks better on you, Harry.”

He gave her the pink toothbrush he’d bought for her for when she slept over. She cleaned her teeth. He waited, leaning in the doorway, watching her with droopy eyes. He was starting to feel sleepy too.

She followed him to his bedroom, her arm wrapped around his waist as she pressed her cheek onto his back. He loved her like this, they already were quite physically affectionate but that was usually Harry initiating it. But drunk Y/n loved to touch him, he’d always known that. She was the same in uni.

When they made it to his room he opened his cupboard. Grabbing a jumper he wore earlier that day and a pair of clean boxers. He handed them to her and since she was drunk, and they had started to see each other nude more often she had no shyness in taking off her dress and Harry’s jacket. She threw it to the floor before she finally took off her bra and undies to slip into Harry’s clothes. The navy jumper smelt of him and she loved that. 

The whole room smelt of him. She took his slippers off and left them by the foot of the bed.

“In ya’ get.” He gestured to his messy thrown sheets. She quickly crawled up to the pillows before wrapping herself in his big fluffy duvet. He turned his lamp off and got in beside her with a sigh.

“Thanks.” She whispered looking up at him. 

He just gave her a crooked smile, all dimples. “Of course.”

She moved closer to him resting her head on his chest.

“Sooky pants.” He teased, arms still wrapping around her. 

She didn’t reply, just kissed his chest. It made his cheeks heat up. She made it hard for him not to feel like this. Did she even realise? He would do anything if it meant he got some of her. Even if she didn’t want to date him, he was happy with anything. Any piece of her was enough to keep Harry.

The two fell asleep quickly, wrapped together in each other’s soft touch, they hardly moved at all during their sleep. Feeling peaceful and warm on that chilly evening was enough to make Harry sleep in longer than usual. 

Saturday mornings usually consisted of him going for a run, grocery shopping, calling his Mum or Gemma. But this morning he slept through the sunrise and all the way until 7:00! Harry was honestly amazed, it’d been a long time since he slept in until then. He looked down to find Y/n still buried in his chest, and couldn’t bring himself to move.

After an hour of drifting in and out of sleep, his bladder caused him to get up. He tried to be gentle but Y/n stirred. He placed her gently back but she made a little whine, arms grabbing his. 

“I’ll be right back, Love.” He whispered, kissing her forehead. She let go. 

She opened her eyes, the curtains were half drawn and but it was a rather dreary London morning. Didn’t seem to be raining yet, but thick grey clouds covered the sky so it was practically dark in Harry’s room. She felt awful, slightly hungover, mainly just sleep deprived. She felt tired and sore, kicking off the white duvet she looked down to find a big red blotch staining Harry’s white sheets.

She looked to see it all over her thighs too. “Oh shit!” She gasped. She was so embarrassed. She wanted to cry. She ruined his sheets, his clothes, and oh god. What if he was grossed out? What if he found her digusting? She wasn’t exactly thinking rationally, but she wished she could’ve gotten it another time. Why now?!?!

Her panic was interrupted by Harry coming back from the bathroom. He had two steaming mugs in his hands, all smiley. Happy to see her up, thinking maybe they could go for a walk today. There was a local park nearby. He thought it could be cute, maybe they could get breakfast at a nearby cafe and go for a stroll. Y/n had some study to do but Harry was good at making sure she took enough breaks. She had a habit of overworking herself.

He stopped smiling when he saw her panic and glossy eyes. “Y/n, what’s wrong?”

“I’m sorry.” She said, tears spilling from her eyes. He frowned, he hated seeing her cry. He walked closer to the bed placing the two teas on the bedside table and finally saw what she was talking about. She must have gotten her period in the night or early this morning.

He shook his head. “Don’t be sorry, baby, it happens.”

She placed her head in her hands, body slightly jolting from her sobs. He quickly wrapped her in his arms, rubbing her back. “It’s alright, I promise.”

“But I-I—” She hiccuped, pulling back slightly,“—r-ruined y-your sheets, Harry.”

“No you haven’t I’ll go wash them, it’s not a problem. It’s only sheets.” He caressed her head, pushing back stray hairs.

“What about your clothes?” Her lip quivered. She felt awful. So guilty.

“I’ll wash those too, Petal, s’fine.”

She frowned. “I’m so sorry. I know it’s gross.”

He frowned deeply. “S’not gross, it’s natural. Y’can’t control it, Love.”

She didn’t say anything, just looked down at the mess on the sheets and her legs. 

He kissed her forehead. “M’ gonna run you a bath, get some new clothes f’ya, and then I’ll get y’whatever breakfast y’want.”

She looked up, smiling gratefully. 

“What stuff do y’need? Do you need any pain relief?” He pulled out his phone and wrote down the list of things she needed. 

She felt so lucky, Harry was so sweet about it. Listening to every detail and asking questions.

He then ran a big bubble bath for her, lavender scented soap filled the room. He dimmed the lights and checked the temperature of the water with his hands. It felt just right. After he turned the water off he got a big fluffy black towel for when she was done. 

She stripped off his clothes telling Harry she’d wash them after she had her bath but Harry beat her to it and did the sheets and clothes all in one go while she warmed up and cleaned herself.

While she relaxed he did a few things around the house, including bringing her in a tea and his laptop to watch some Friends on. She needed something that didn’t involve thinking. 

He gave her a peck before leaving to buy her some pads and tampons, and the specific pain relief she wanted. 

Harry will admit that since gaining money he tended to go a bit over board sometimes. He came back home with enough pads and tampons for a year and lots of other things; including her favourite snacks and chocolate. 

When he came home from shopping he found Y/n relaxing still in the bath, eyes shut, as Friends played in the background. She opened her eyes, she looked a bit ill. She sometimes had really bad period pain. Today was one of those days.

He gave her a little haul of the things he bought. “I got tha’ ones with daisies s’on like y’asked.” He said shaking the box with the daisies. “Here’s the pain medication.”

She silently wondered if this is what a boyfriend would do. Her inexperienced brain made her question her sanity. Maybe this was normal for friends with benefits. She had literally nothing to base it on.

When he was done showing her he put them on the sink and Y/n told him she was ready to get out. He quickly shut the door giving her some privacy before grabbing some clothes for her to wear. 

He found a big black jumper with ‘Pleasing’ on the front, she loved this one (always knicking it), a plain white shirt of his that he wore to the gym sometimes, and a pair of black tracksuit pants with the drawstring so they would fit her well. He also found a pair of fluffy socks and had even bought some cotton underwear for her so she didn’t have to wear his boxers. At this point, Harry kind of wished she had a drawer here for her stuff. He liked having her here, and it might make things a little easier.

He knocked asking to come in. She mumbled a ‘come in’, and he did. She had wrapped herself in the towel. 

He handed her the pile of clothes, stroking her cheek. Her hair was damp letting the water fall over her neck, back, and shoulders.

“These are all clean and I bought some undies from the shop, so you should have everything. Let me know if you need anything else.”

“Thank you, Harry.” She said softly, eyes scanning his features. His eyes looked so green in the dim darkly lit house. How did he look so good right now? He was in casual lounge clothes. A pair of grey tracksuit pants that made him look muscular and a loose black long-sleeve. He looked so pretty watching her like that, arms crossed and worried eyes. He looked pretty all the time.

Today felt more intimate than anything they had done. Today had felt real.

“Of course, Petal. I’ll leave you to change.” He kissed her forehead.

He went downstairs, doing his usual morning routinely bits and bobs. When Y/n came down she had blow-dried her hair and washed her face. Her eyes, even with deep bags, still looked pretty. Lips all pouty. She seemed calmer now, but still tired.

“Are y’feeling up ta’ goin’ out?”

Even though she was tired, Harry had an excited look, how could she say no to him? Even if her uterus was angry inside her. 

“Okay? Breakfast?”

He nodded. “How could I drag you out without the promise of breakfast and a good time?”

She giggled.

They layered up for the winter weather, with puffer jackets and beanies. Y/n felt so funny in all of Harry’s clothes, but the smell made her so calm she was ready for a nap.

Harry mentioned that it was only a short walk through the park and then they’d be there. Since it was a pretty quiet area and Harry was wearing a beanie and sunglasses he wasn’t too worried about being noticed. Y/n was much the same in a pink beanie of his and this big crimson scarf around her neck. 

It was the one he wore on New Year's of  2014. “Harry, this is an old one isn’t it?”

He was typing on his phone replying to a worried Olive. He was annoyed she’d left Y/n to fend for herself and ditched her for a bloke. Nonetheless he told her Y/n was fine. He looked up at her, they were walking down his street. 

“Sorry, Love? What?”

She smiled placing a hand on her neck. “I remember this…”

“Oh, right. Yeah, had it for ages.”

She smiled softly. He turned is phone off and put it in his pocket grabbing her hand which had been swallowed by the long arms of his jumper. She let him, it felt too nice to pull away. His hand was warm and soft. She leaned into the comforting touch.

He kissed her hairline as they strolled through the park. It was chilly, Y/n found herself leaning into him happily. She wished it could be like this everyday. It was a Saturday so it was as busy as the quiet area got. Children ran around with worried mothers chasing after them. Teenagers on bikes laughing and flying by. Old couples wandered around closely together. 

They fit right in. Seeming like two normal people, a normal couple.

Harry wasn’t some rockstar right now, with Y/n he was just himself. Just Harry from Holmes Chaple. He loved that Y/n grounded him and made him feel normal, this to most was a boring day but to Harry the best in a long time.

When they got to the small strip of cafes Harry guided her to his favourite place. 

Over delicious hot chocolates and breakfast, the cold morning felt warm and Harry and Y/n felt blissful.

"Haz, thank you again,"

He just smiled and leaned in for a long kiss. It was nice and with no real sexual intentions. Just a genuine soft, warm, slow, nice kiss.

"Of course, now stop thanking me. No need. An' tell me what yeh' think of the eggs."

if you enjoyed this feel free to check out my masterlist here! xx feel free to request me too!

[jiminwreckedme]

Cottage of the Seven Dads.

DIONYSUS (1)

Other drabbles - Masterpost  Members - OT7 bangtan (reader insert also present.)  Word count - 3.8K Genre - pure bangtan as dads fluff. (Rated G)

“Yes, we are her fathers and no, we are not gay.”

A/n - The drabbles follow an order, it’s suggested you read the previous parts as listed in the masterpost to to understand the follow of events!

 “Hello?” 

You turn around at the tugging sensation of you shirt and look down to see a small girl, head barely reaching up to your hips, looking up at you, her eyes big, cheeks flushed red. She’s adorable with her straight, jet black waist length hair, the studded hair snap that was holding back her fringes matching the tiny demin overalls she was dressed in. She was nervous you could tell, clutching the straps of her backpack tightly and softly tapping her white sneakers on the tiled floor. 

You crouch down, meeting her at eye level as you smiled, trying to be as warm as possible. 

“Hi there! Are you the one who-” You act it out in the air. “-pulled my shirt?” 

She nods fast. “What’s your name?” 

“My name?”

“Dad says I shouldn’t talk to strangers,” She scratches the back of her head. “But I need help....So, let’s be friends? What’s your name?”

You laugh softly, “Y/n. And you are?”

“Ariel, though my parents call me grandma.” She rolls her eyes before quickly changing her demeanor and holding her hand out. “I’d like it if you call me Aria.” 

“Aria.” You take her hand, amused. “It’s nice to meet you.”

“Likewise.” She nods and you purse your lips stop yourself laughing. This child couldn’t be more than 5 years old but from whatever little you had seen, she undoubtedly had the soul of a 75 year old. No wonder they called her grandma. 

“So Aria, how may I help you?”

“I’m lost. Y/n. I can’t find my parents anywhere.”

In the middle of such a huge hospital? Uh oh, not good. 

“Do remember where you last saw them?”

“We were in the canteen.” She looks away, forehead scrunched in thought. “Daddy was buying me lunch when he got a call. And then he panicked and started to leave but I’m tiny so I couldn’t keep up and I lost him.” She shrugs like she’s indifferent but you see the disappointment in her eyes. 

“Aw, he left you behind? How sad.”

“You mean how irresponsible.” She softly smacks her head, exasperated, making you chuckle.  “You’ve no idea how many times I’ve gone through this..”

What an absolute grandma. 

“Okay, let’s find your parents and scold them for leaving you alone, okay?” She nods at your words determined, pursing her lips. “Do you remember where you were before you went to the canteen?”

“Not very well.” She squints, playing with her fingers, tongue sticking into her cheek in thought. “It was op, no, no, was it ob…?”

“Ophthalmology?”

She shakes her head, unwittingly pouting. “I didn’t see really well, we were just rushing around the whole day today.”

“Alright then,... do you know why you came to the hospital today?” 

“My parents said we were getting new family members today, a sibling for me.”

“Oh, Ob-gyn.” You deduce. Of course her father rushed over a phone call, understandable. “Aria, I think I know where your parents are.”

“Really?” Her eyes shine. 

“They’re a bit far from here.” You glance up at the boards hanging from the ceiling, understanding the directions. “But if you want I can take you to them.”

You hold out your hand but she hesitates. “You won’t kidnap me, right?”

You laugh. “Of course not, we’re friends. Friends help each other and I want to help you.” 

“Okay then.” She nods as you stand up, ignoring the slight pain in your knees, awkwardly still holding your hand out which she didn’t attempt to reach for. 

“Uh....Would you like me to carry you?”

“No” She finally holds your hand, her tiny fingers lacing between yours. “I can walk, I’m a big girl.” 

“Okay big girl, let’s go then.” 

Walking ahead you hold onto her small hand, mind wandering over the tiny details like what if your hand started sweating, what if your rings hurt her, what if the pressure you were exerting was too less? Some children liked to have their hands held tight, for moral support but she didn’t strike to you as the kind who appreciated that. 

You give a curious side eyed glance at her and sure enough, she seemed fine, unbothered by the way you were holding her. She simply searched through the crowd, constantly muttering words under her breath you couldn’t quite hear. You wondered what her 75 year old brain was thinking. Normally you wouldn’t be interested in knowing what she was saying. You were the kind who enjoyed the rare silence when kids kept quiet. Being someone who worked in a daycare meant you hear too many kids talking, screaming and wailing on a daily basis. In fact it was enough to make you not want to have children of your own. 

That and the fact that having a child required so many things - financial stability, having the time to actually raise a child and not to forget, a source of sperm. Being single for the last 4 years completely eliminated any and all opportunities for that. But seeing kids like her? It instantly appealed to the idea of rushing to a sperm bank and getting yourself one of these little buggers. You can’t help but think of how cute she’d look with a small beanie that went with this outfit and how many different ways you could do her long hair, and all the places you’d walk with her hand in hand. You’d definitely not leave her in the canteen, that’s for sure.

“Aria!” 

The both of you turn at the sound to see a man run up to you face flushed, as Aria finally smiles. He’s dressed in a long striped shirt, half tucked in and half out of his jeans, monster size shoes on his feet as he rushed in them towards you, holding his phone against his ear. As he got closer you see what a fine looking man he is, - sharp features, cute wrinkles forming at the corner of his eyes, his very obvious adams apple, soft hair falling into his eyes, long slender fingers pushing them back and-

“It’s Daddy.” 

Those two words are enough to metaphorically slap you out of your almost drooling face as the man barely stops before instantly crouching beside his daughter, pulling her in his arms into a hug, balancing the phone between his ear and his shoulder.

“Yeah, yeah Jungkook I found her.” He pants, rubbing her arm in relief. “Yeah she’s fine…..What? Where? I don’t know-”

He looks around for a bit before finally turning to you, giving a courteous smile. “Excuse me, do you know where exactly we are right now?”

“Uh yeah the dialysis centre.” 

“Dionysus?” He scrunches his nose in the most adorable way. Stop it, Y/n. 

Aria takes her father’s face in her tiny hands, turning him towards her. “Di-al-y-sis.” She repeats for you, one syllable at a time. 

“Ah, dialysis, the dialysis centre JK….come fast.”

Cutting the call, he took a good look at his daughter, struggling to slip his phone in the back pocket of his jeans. “Oh god I was so scared, where did you go off wandering?” 

“You left me! I was-”

“Voice.” The sudden sternness in his otherwise seemingly cheerful personality takes you aback. “We don’t use a loud voice when we talk in public right?”

“I was looking for you everywhere!” Aria harshly whispers, correcting herself. “Why did you walk so fast, you know my legs hurt!” 

“Oh my angel.” He pouts sadly at his girl, making her forget her annoyance. “Daddy is really sorry, I forgot you got hurt yesterday. Do you want me to carry you?” 

“No, not you” She shakes her head. “I’m a big girl, remember?”

“Ok, alright, Bunny is on his way here, ask him to ok?” He drops a kiss on her forehead. “Now turn around.” before carefully spinning her clockwise, unzipping her bag and pulling out a small white beanie. Cute, that was exactly the kind of beanie you had in mind earlier. He slips it onto her head, muttering softly. “You’re going to get cold at this rate, I keep telling you to wear this-” 

“Bunny!”

“-Aria, wait I didn’t zip your bag!”  

But to no avail. 

His daughter had caught the sight of a certain someone across the corridor, bolting in a split second before her father even had the chance to put the beanie on her properly. 

“Don’t run!” The other man picked up his pace towards her the moment his ears caught her voice. “You fell down yesterday right?”

“Yeah, my leg hurts.” She threw her hands up, looking up at him as the man laughed, swiftly lifting her into his arms. 

“Aw, it’s fine, bunny is here to the rescue.” He fondly tucks her hair behind her ears, adjusting her beanie, walking ahead. 

“Thank you.”

You turn at the voice of the man next to who by now had stood up, dusting his pants, smiling at his daughter in the hands of the other man. You were so lost in just watching all 3 of them, you forgot why your presence here might even matter.

“We were so worried.”

“Oh that’s fine.” You brush it off. “She was a pleasure to meet.”

“Isn’t she?” He laughs, turning to you, extending his hand. “Jung Hoseok.” 

“Y/n.” You shake his hand, only just realizing something. He shared the same jet black hair as his daughter but that was about it. Other than that they looked significantly different, nothing like father and daughter. You looked over at the other man trying to piece everything together. Neither did he look anything like Aria. Again, except the black hair. He was tall, leaning more towards the buff side or maybe that was just his biker jacket? You didn’t know but he displayed a sort of rugged charm and not to mention, looked extremely young. Too young to be a father, too old to be a brother. Who was he?

“Jeon Jungkook.” He nods politely at you with a shy smile. “Thank you for helping Aria out Y/n.”

“How do you both know each other Aria?” Hoseok asks his daughter, readjusting her beanie.

“I just asked her name and asked her to help me.” She answers, earning wide eyes from both men.

“You don’t know each other from before?” Hoseok turns to you and you shake your head, confirming it. 

“What did we tell you about talking to strangers?” Jungkook tries to whisper but you hear it anyways. 

“But I became friends with her first!” She justifies.

Hoseok sighs, “Jin hyung will lose his shit if he finds out about this. Anyway,” He shakes if off. “Aria, did you thank Ms.Y.n?” 

“Thank you, Y/n.” She says sweetly, tilting her head at you, making you break out the widest smile. 

“You’re welcome, Aria.” You hold your hand up earning a high five from her. “Stay close to daddy next time ok? Or let him carry you like this when you’re in crowded places.”

“She won’t let me.” Hoseok laughs, finally getting around to zipping her bag. “She won’t let anyone but this guy carry her.”

“Bunny is the strongest.” She wraps her arms around Jungkook’s neck, pressing her head against his. “Everyone else turns red five minutes after carrying me. Especially him.” She gives Hoseok a side eye making his squint in annoyance as Jungkook laughs before his face morphs with a sudden realisation. 

“Speaking of everyone else, hyung,” Jungkook turns to the older man “I haven’t told them we found her, call them will you?”

“I dropped a text on the group a minute ago.” Hoseok waves the phone in his hand before turning to you, bowing. “We should head back now, Thank you for everything Y/n. I’m sure the rest of us would like to thank you too but we are required to wait where they asked us to, I hope you understand.” 

Rest of us?

“Yes, yes of course. I should go too.  ” You take a step back, eyes searching for the elevator. “and I understand, don’t worry about it, just hold her hand tight the next time.” 

“I shall make sure of that.”  Hoseok laughs, nodding. “Which way are you headed?” 

You point at the elevator a few feet away. “Second floor, the maternity ward.” 

“Oh that’s right past where we are, right Jungkook?” Hoseok turns to Jungkook who nods.  Oh god, this wasn’t a goodbye then, how awkward. “We are headed the same way then. I guess you can meet everyone after all.”

Everyone who?

“I guess so,” Normally you would have made an excuse to avoid further interaction but your curiosity gets the better of you. “I’d love to meet...everyone.” 

As Jungkook sets off first, Aria giggling in his arms as he plays around with her,  Hoseok walks with you right behind the younger man, affectionately watching them. 

“The maternity ward?” Hoseok looks at you curiously. 

“My friend gave birth yesterday.” You clarify, matching your step with his as all of you stepped into the elevator. “ I came to check up on both of them.”

“That’s sweet.” Jungkook quips before looking away, turning silent again. He was definitely the shy kind.

“Ah, I see. Boy or a girl?” 

“A baby girl.” You answer Hoseok, tapping away your foot. Small talk is so uncomfortable.

“How many parents does this baby girl have?” Aria who was silent all this while speaks again. “ Two? One boy and one girl?” 

You look at Aria bewildered. You understood ‘one boy and one girl?’ but how many parents? What kind of question was that?

“Uh yeah?” 

Why would she ask something like that?

And you found out why the very next moment, when the lift dings open revealing a man, skin as white as the wall behind him, clothes the complete opposite color, a pitch black, just like his hair. 

“Ya halmeoni,” He crosses his arms, looking at Aria half laughing. “You don’t just talk like one, you walk like one as well. How did you get lost?”

“Papa” She whines. Papa? “I wasn’t slow, Daddy walked too fast.”

“Yeah yeah catch me.” Hoseok scoffs, stepping out first followed by Jungkook. 

“Where was she?” 

“Is she okay?” 

“Where did you find her?” 

“Ya, we were so scared, Jimin ran a whole marathon around the hospital looking for her.” 

So many voices. Way too many voices. 

“She’s fine. At the dialysis center.”

“You mean the Dionysus center?” You hear Aria sneer and you can’t see what Hoseok does thanks to Jungkook’s huge back blocking your view but whatever it is, it makes her laugh.  

“And this is?” 

The pale man, looks at you and Jungkook finally realizes he is in your way and moves aside, half bowing apologetically and at last you see who ‘everyone’ was and oh my were they many. 

There’s one man before you, two men sprawled out on the couch, one calmly leaning against the wall next to them and another pacing about nervously, occasionally glancing at the door beside him. You do a quick head count. There’s seven of them. Seven men.

“Y/n,” Hoseok introduces sitting down on an empty chair, crossing his legs. “She was the one who helped Aria and guess how Jin hyung.” The man on the sofa opens his shut eyes at the mention of his name. “She went up to her, asked her  name, decided she wasn’t a stranger anymore and then asked her to help.”

Jin let out the largest sigh you’ve ever heard. “I did not think this was what my weeks of training would result in.”

“Dad, she’s my friend.” Aria struggles out of Jungkook’s arms, sliding down and walking up to center, crossing her arms. “Be nice everyone and say thank you”

“Thank you Y/n.” They all obey immediately, seven voices ring across the corridor. 

“It’s ok.” Meekly you give a small nod, clearly intimidated by their presence. Anyone would be. They had some sort of aura to them. The kind that made it hard to look at but also hard to look away. They were so different, it made you want to see more and more. Their dressing sense, the way they did their hair, the way they carried themselves, the expressions on their faces as they sat outside a delivery room, the expression on their faces as they looked at you - nothing about them was the same. 

Except the black hair. They all had black hair. Oh and they all looked at Aria like she was the light of their lives. What kind of relationship did she share with them? You heard her address 3 different people as her father already. What about the rest of them? The craziest thought went through your head but no way. They couldn’t all be…. 

“Let me clear the confusion, this is not new to us.” The man who was pacing around stops his tracks before you, chuckling. “Yes all of us are her fathers and no, we are not gay.” He looks around the room. “All of us just raise her together.” 

“Oh.” You blink, absolutely stumped. No wonder she asked how many parents? This young girl had seven. “That’s….uh wow, that’s really unexpected.” 

“We get that a lot.” He nods, holding out his hand, dimples denting his cheeks as he smiled. “Kim Namjoon.” 

“Y/n.” 

“Pleasure.” This is where Aria got her eloquence from. “Thank you for helping out our daughter. We’ve all been taking turns running around finding her for the last 15 minutes.”

“Thank god she’s here and fine.” Who spoke? The man leaning against the wall? “I don’t have the energy to run after her again.”

“You didn’t even run after her once.” Jin argues. 

“I’m still tired.” He sighs, sinking further into the wall. “How many days have we been here for? Does making babies always take this long?”

“The timing for making babies is subjective if you ask me.”

Hoseok smacks the knee of the man near him. “Shut up Park Jimin.”

“Four hours.” Jin shakes his head in response. “We’ve been here for four hours and don’t make it sound like that Taehyung-ah. It's a human coming out from another human, not instant rice you put in a microwave. Of course it’s going to take long.” 

“I know but this wait,” Taehyung groans, looking almost dead on the inside. “It's exhausting.”

“Imagine how it must be for her.” Hoseok interjects looking towards the room. “You can’t handle 4 hours, she’s been dealing with this for nine months.”

“Yeah, I’m sorry.” Sighing Taehyung shut his eyes. “I haven’t eaten anything since last night, I’ve been seeing stars all day.”

“Sit down hyung.” Jungkook walks over grabbing Taehyung by the arm, dragging him like he was nothing. Strongest amongst them all indeed. “Jimin hyung, scoot to the right please.” And then he plops the Taehyung right in between Jin and Jimin, was it?  

“Why don’t you just eat something hyung?” Jungkook looks over at him pitifully.

“Taetae is doing his detox week for his blog,” Aria eagerly answers. “He only drinks juice for seven days.”

“Right you are sweetie.” Taehyung shoots Aria a tired smile. “Your bunny asks me the same thing every month and I tell him the same thing every month as well.” 

“A two year old remembers things better than you JK.” Hoseok laughs. 

“For the last time.” Jimin shakes his head. “She’s five, she was two when we had her, she’s five now.” 

“Wow, she’s growing up so fast.” Hoseok realizes softly. “Has it really been three years?” 

“Feels like it's been 80 years.” You flinch ever so slightly finding the pale man walking past you to Aria, pulling her cheeks. “This tiny thing behaves like she’s 95 after all.”

“Don’t pull her cheeks Yoongi.” Jin warns him, peaking with one eye open, trying not to laugh. “Halmeoni’s teeth might drop.” 

Aria shakes her head glancing over at the door everyone was waiting before, talking to it. “I feel bad for you, whoever is in there, you are about to be part of one crazy, bullying family.” 

As six of her fathers erupt in fierce arguments, Yoongi updates you. “We are adopting again.” He softly pats the head of his daughter who was playfully squabbling with the other men. “We felt like she needs company growing up so in there,” He points with the jerk of his head. “That’s the new installment coming into this, as Aria said, crazy family.” 

You let out a small wow amazed. You didn’t know about crazy but from whatever little you had seen there was undoubtedly a lot of love. Not just for their daughter but between the seven men as well. The fact that they were willing to all raise not one child but two together? That baby in there was a lucky one. 

“But remember what I said?” Taehyung leans forward, elbows resting on his knees. “Your teeth will start falling cause you’re becoming a big girl, you’re six years old already-”

“Five.”

“-but that’s nothing to be scared of right? When teeth fall remember who I said comes to visit?”

“The tooth fairy.” Jimin answers instead. 

“The tooth fairy?” Aria crosses her arms. “Will she be the same skinny Santa who came last year?” She back at Yoongi who avoids her eyes very consciously. 

“He had one job.” Taehyung mutters. “I have no idea why he didn’t wear the fake belly, I should have just done it myself like always.”

“He was on a diet plan because of Mrs. Santa.” Yoongi sneers, clearly defending himself.

“More like he was malnourished.” She shoots back. 

Yoongi incredulously looked at Jimin . “Why the f-frick does she even know that word, she’s barely 2!”

“She’s 5! And don’t look at me ask him,” He points at Namjooon. “He’s the one who teaches her all these gigantic words. The other day she said I was too meticulous. I myself don’t know what that means.”

“Its your fault,” Namjoon defends himself, looking at Yoongi. “She gets this habit of talking back from you a d like you weren’t enough, now we have two savages in the house.”

“That’s true,” Hoseok shakes his head. “She’s been serving some serious burns these days.”

“She’s practically an arsonist.” Namjoon added. 

“Stop using such big words in front of her!” Yoongi explodes causing everyone to burst out laughing. 

Aria shakes her head, talking not so softly to herself. “The kind of thins I have to deal with in this house.” You snicker to yourself, hearing her. “I don’t know why they named me Ariel, this is clearly a Snow White and the seven dwarfs situation.” 

“Say what?” Jimin who also seems to have heard it, narrows his eyes at Aria from all the way across her. 

“I was just saying how much I love Snow White.” She shrugs simply.  

“But you hate Snow White.”

“Yeah I do,” She confesses, unable to keep the act. “She did practically nothing but clean some random people’s house and sleep in a glass coffin.”

“Better than Arora right?” Namjoon scoffs. “The woman spent the whole movie sleeping.”

Aria waves her hand dramatically. “Don’t even get me started about her.”

Hoseok sighs. “You’ve ruined fairy tales for her Namjoon-ah.” 

“And me.” Taehyung raises his hand. “I can’t go through one movie with her without having to hear about how we need stronger heroines who stand up for themselves-.” 

“Tae, I swear she comes up with all this stuff herself-” 

“-all she wants to watch is Frozen and Tangled and Brave and all that 21st century abomination, she has no respect for the classics.” 

“Abomination is not a word sweetie.” Yoongi explains to Aria, extremely serious. “Don’t go around using it, you’re just 2 years old.”

“FIVE.” Jimin rolls his eyes. 

“You can watch Beauty and the Beast with her Tae,” Jin plays the middle man. “Strong female lead and it’s a classic, there, problem solved.” He does a sweep with his hand before dropping it back onto his thighs. “Though I must say, I’m very disappointed that Belle owns nothing pink.” 

“She has one pink outfit.” Aria quips, lifting a finger. “That she wears in the snow and plays with the beast.” 

“And the birds.” Taehyung supports her turning to a surprised Jin. “We’ve seen this movie exactly 514 times till date, what do you expect?”

“514?” Yoongi sounds shocked. “ You let her watch the television for so long? What’s going to happen to her eyes?? 514 means watching that movie everyday for all the 2 years she’s been alive so far-”

“Oh my god.” Jimin shakes his head. “I can’t do this anymore.” 

“Alright, enough you guys.” Hoseok looks around at them. “Let’s respect the place, shall we? We can do all this at home where no one will stop-”

Taehyung’s stomach interrupts with the loudest rumble, making everyone turn to him slowly.  

“Okay that’s it, you really need food.” Yoongi steps up. “Anyone want anything else? I should make a trip to the canteen.”

“Don’t take me along please.” Aria steps back, shooting Hoseok a traumatized look. “I don’t want to get lost again.”

“You don’t have a choice.” Yoongi picks her up with one hand around her small waist earning an eruption of voices asking him to be careful, trying to stop him, Jungkook almost walking up to him, annoyed. And then there’s the creak of the door and everyone shuts up in an instant, pin drop silence filling the corridor. 

A lady in her scrubs steps out, pulling her face mask down to her chin with a smile. 

“Congratulations,” You can hear the men around you very audibly gulp. “You’ve just had healthy twins.” 

[breanime]

Helpless (Part Two)

Thank you all for the support and interest you’ve already shown in this series! I’m so glad to have such sweet and supportive friends on this site. I hope you like Part Two, and as always, please feel free to tell me how you liked this one, on anon or not! :)

Overall warning for this series: mentions/depictions of violence, some future parts may get ~steamy~

*gif not mine*

You sat, clothes crinkled with your brother’s dried blood, handcuffed to a table at the police station. You’d told them everything: dates, names, places—only leaving out Khalil. He was too young, too fresh. This wasn’t his battle; you didn’t want him to get into any trouble. You had spent the night getting interviewed, first by two cops, then by the two cops and a lawyer, then by the sheriff, two cops, and the Chief of Police. You had signed several papers, committing to your statement. You didn’t care what happened to you; you just wanted Joe to pay.

“Uncuff her,” a woman wearing a suit came in with a manila folder under her arm, “She’s not under arrest.”

The Chief of Police puffed his chest out. He looked like a bird trying to intimidate a much more dangerous predator. “Says who?”

“The Department of Homeland Security,” she answered briskly, taking her badge out and flashing it to them, “Special Agent Dinah Madani. I need the room, please.”

The cops grumbled, but did as she asked, filing out of the room quickly. The agent sat across from you, opening the folder as you stared.

“I’m not under arrest?” You asked.

She shook her head. “Not at the moment, and you won’t ever be, if you agree to be my witness. You give me any and everything I need to get Joseph Yakavetta behind bars, and I’ll grant you full immunity.”

You nodded. You were already committed to giving the cops full honesty, but the addition of immunity certainly appealed to you. Though you were surprised to see the Feds were interested in Big Joe, too. “Deal.”

Things moved quickly after that; Agent Madani took your statement and then had you transferred to a hotel. You took a shower, watching Ronnie’s blood circle the drain, feeling numb and raw all at once.

The Feds had provided you with a small wardrobe, so you got dressed and sat at the edge of the bed, looking through some of the paperwork Madani had given you. The terms were clear: you would only get full immunity if Big Joe was taken down, otherwise, you would be tried for the multiple robbery charges that were tied to your name. You’d asked Madani how she was planning on keeping you safe, and she’d said something about a kind of witness protection. The way she described it (or under described it, to be more accurate), made it seem like you didn’t apply for actual witness protection, but she said something about getting you a security detail. Until then, you had strict instructions not to leave your room unless accompanied by Madani or one of the other Feds who ran with her.

Which is how you ended up in your hotel room for two weeks straight, only leaving to go to the police station and back. You felt like an animal in a cage, spending hours at a time pacing your room, building in breaks to stare out of the window every few minutes, which was exactly what you were doing when your phone—a black flip phone provided by Homeland Security—rang.

“Agent Madani,” you drawled.

“I’m sending Agent Stein over with your security detail. They’re going to go over a few things with you and then move you to a secondary location,” she said, business as usual, “Pack your things and be ready.”

“Wait, wait, wait,” you said before she could hang up, “Does this mean our BFF sleepovers are over? How will I cope?”

You could practically hear her roll her eyes on the other line. “Get ready, Y/N, they’ll be there in less than 15 minutes.”

You pocketed your phone and got to it, throwing your clothes and charger and toiletries in the duffel bag Madani had given you. The night Ronnie died, you’d cut off a piece of the shirt you were wearing before giving the rest of your clothes to the Feds, and you had it at the bottom of your bag. You looked at it whenever you felt unsure, whenever you were feeling scared or caged in, and looking at it strengthened your resolve. Joe killed Ronnie and Jamal, and you couldn’t let him get away with that.

There was a knock on your door; three hard knocks and two soft ones, the knock the Feds used. Still, you looked through the peephole and didn’t unlock it until you saw Agent Stein’s face.

“Madani said I’m finally getting out of this hellhole,” you said, opening the door and stepping behind it like they���d trained you to—just in case an agent had been compromised or been followed or something—and let Stein lead the security in. You shut the door and turned to address Stein once more, but you froze in your tracks.

Billy Russo was standing in your hotel room.

Two Days Earlier

Billy adjusted his tie as he stood in front of the mirror, giving himself a final once-over. He looked good, comfortable in his three-piece suit with his designer shoes and $300 haircut. He got into his car, the Rolls Royce Wraith, and noted every single look of envy he got on the ride over. He fucking loved that look, ate it up like candy. Curtis had called him a man “of wealth and taste”, and he’d liked that. No one who was looking at him now would know he was an unwanted orphan, or that he got his start from dirty money made overseas. Sometimes, in times like these when he was feeling untouchable, even he was able to forget his beginnings for a moment, but just a moment.

He parked his car and went in, letting himself operate on autopilot as he greeted the secretary and the head nurse. He let himself into his mother’s room, closing the door behind him.

She was unconscious, strapped to the bed by her wrists and ankles, and Billy felt that same contradicting wave of anger and smugness and disgust and shame go through him as he looked at her. He took his jacket off and draped it over a chair before seating himself at the edge of the bed. He took out the syringe, prepping it before plunging it into her IV.

His mother blinked herself awake, muttering as she came to. Her eyes widened when they landed on him, and she shuffled on the bed, making little distressed noises at the sight of her only son.

“Hey Mom,” he said, voice low. He didn’t want to startle her even more than she already was. “The nurses say you’re doing good, had a little set back a few weeks ago, got a little spirited, they tell me,” he put his hand on her ankle, and felt her try to recoil. He tightened his hold on her. “I’ve been good, too. Been working a lot,” he looked at the wall as he spoke, “Though I have…” He glanced down at his mother again. If he couldn’t tell her, who else could he tell? “… I’ve been having these dreams lately, memories really, of this girl I knew.” He looked back at his mom, her dark eyes watery and unfocused as a result of the cocktail of meds she was on, a strange reflection of his own eyes. “She, uh, she was the only woman I’ve ever just…wanted,” he said, thinking of your smile and the mischievous twinkle you’d get in your eye when you looked at him, “I mean, she was gorgeous and confident and real, and I just… I liked being around her, you know?” He tilted his head. “Have you ever felt like that?” He asked, knowing she wouldn’t—couldn’t—answer. “Was it like that with you and my father?” He laughed humorlessly. “Probably not, huh?” He shook his head. “Well, I never felt like that until I met her. I thought, at first, that it was just physical, my attraction to her but then…” Billy gave a shrug; it was hard to put his thoughts into words—especially the thoughts about you, things he’d never said outloud before, but he felt like he had to try, had to get them out. “I don’t know, she just… She made me feel connected to something, you know? Connected to her. It’s not like we were dating or anything, but we spent time together… All that time we were hooking up, she never even told me her last name.” He chuckled; he had liked that about you, the mystery, the way you held some things about you so close to your chest. He remembered being intrigued by you, wanting to figure you out—not for any monetary goal or strategic advantage or anything like that, just because you fascinated him. “I was kind of getting used to her,” he confessed, “I liked being around her, and liked spending time with her, but… You remember the guy I told you about? Rawlins?” He looked down at his mom, who just frowned back at him. “He came around again,” his hand twitched on his mother’s ankle, “Back then, a year ago, I still owed him a debt—I’m all paid up now,” he assured her, “Paid up and then some, but then… I had to step away, you know? From her, I mean. Thought it’d be easier if I just went off the grid for a while, and when I got back…” He looked over at the wall again, feeling that same anxiety from that day bubble up inside of him, the dark cloud that had come over him as he stared at your empty apartment. “…She was long gone.” He stood up, needing to move. “I don’t blame her,” he said, rolling his shoulders, “It’s not like we were… It doesn’t matter. It’s just weird, isn’t it, that I’ve been dreaming about her lately?” He looked back at his mother, hands in his pocket. “I usually don’t… dwell on things like this.” He felt his phone vibrate, and he took it out. “It’s work,” he informed his mom, taking the call.

“Russo,” he answered, voice commanding and sure.

“I’m sorry to call you, Mr. Russo, I know this is your personal time,” his assistant began.

“It’s fine,” he interrupted, “What is it?”

“There’s a Dinah Madani from Homeland Security on the line; she says she has a job for you. She says it’s urgent.”

Billy cocked an eyebrow. It must be urgent if Dinah was calling him. “I’m on my way,” he said, hanging up without another word.

He turned back to his mother; she had tears in her eyes. “Gotta go,” he picked his jacket up and shrugged it back on, “You know, I… We could have been a family. I would have taken care of you, given you anything…” He stopped himself. He gave this same speech every time he came here. “…See you next time, Mom.”

He called Dinah back when he got to his office, not sure if this was really a work call or something more…personal.

“I need a favor,” she said in lieu of an actual greeting, “I’ve got a case that hinges on this eyewitness that needs to be protected. I need to get her to D.C quickly, safely, and as quietly as possible. Can you do it?”

Billy sat back at his desk. So this was a professional call. Good. “I’m gonna need more than that, Agent Madani,” he said back, “Who’s she testifying against? How much danger is she in?”

“His name is Joseph ‘Big Joe’ Yakavetta,” Madani answered, “He started out as a small-time gangster out of New York and grew up to be a national threat. He had a group of vagabonds helping him rob armored trucks and banks and other secure vehicles, and on his last heist, he managed to walk off with several high-security documents as well as ATM access codes and other intel.”

“How does that concern Homeland?”

He heard Madani sigh on the other line. She should have known that he wouldn’t take that vague crap—if he was even going to consider this job, he needed details. “I can’t get into it over the phone,” she said, voice low, “But I’m sending you a file now…”

Billy clicked his email and waited.

“…Long story short, Yakavetta has some valuable information in his possession right now that we need to recover, and he’s wanted for homicide as well.” There was a pause, and Billy knew she was trying to decide how honest to be with him. Apparently, she opted for the truth. “He shot and killed an undercover informant who was working with us,” she confessed, “I put him in there, and he died for it. I need it make it right.”

Billy was getting bored, but the file popped up. He opened it, scrolling through Yakavetta’s rap sheet. He was ex-military, had contacts overseas, and had done a lot of heist jobs all over the U.S. “And why can’t Homeland handle this?” Billy asked, lazily moving to the next document Madani sent.

“My bosses aren’t convinced this is a lucrative case. We’ve been after Yakavetta for years and haven’t been able to make anything stick. It was by the skin of my teeth, but I was able to get enough funding to hire a personal security detail for her.”

Billy made an assenting noise, looking through the file on the three men Yakavetta killed; the truck driver from his latest job, and two of his men—one being the informant. “How many men would you need?” He asked, still unimpressed by this case.

“I’d like it to just be you,” she said back, “You can use as many men as you’d need, of course, but you’d be taking the lead on this.”

Billy stopped, cursor floating over the “next” arrow at the bottom of the page. “You want me on this? Me personally?” He clarified.

“You’re the only one I can trust to do this and do it right,” Madani said, and he pictured her grimacing as she spoke the words, “You’re the best man for the job.”

That was true, Billy knew, but this was beneath him—plus it was a Federal case, so there was no telling just how long it would take. And he’d have to leave New York, travel with some sniveling witness and play babysitter. The money would be good, he knew, government contracts always paid well, and he knew Madani was desperate enough to agree to any number he threw out—but overall, it wouldn’t be worth it. “I can put my best man on it,” he said as he clicked “next”, “but I won’t be able—”

He stopped. Your face was on his computer screen, and Billy nearly dropped his phone. You were the witness. His eyes scanned the page, taking in as much information as he could as Madani talked on the other end of the phone, trying to convince him to take the job.

“…money isn’t an object, Russo, just name the number and I’ll match it. Listen—I can get you out here by tomorrow, I need you on this—”

“—I’ll do it,” he said, eyes stuck on your photo. “I’m in.”

Billy moved quickly after that, making arrangements for Anvil in his absence, packing, and hopping on a plane that very night. He spent the majority of the flight on his laptop, reading and re-reading your file, taking it all in greedily. He knew your last name now. He learned more about you in the last three hours than he had seeing you for a month. But it didn’t satisfy him like he thought it would. What was in your file were just words, black and white, and while the information did fill in some holes for him, he still had questions. Questions only you could answer. And anyway, reading all of this stuff from the Feds wasn’t what he wanted. He wanted to hear it from you, though he wasn’t entirely sure why, couldn’t quite place why it mattered and why his curiosity when it came to you was so damn persistent. He hoped that seeing you again would cure him of it, but deep down…

…He knew it wouldn’t.

Present Day

“Madani said I’m finally getting out of this hellhole,” you said, and Billy had to remind himself to stay professional when he heard your voice. It had been so long, but his body ached—literally ached—at just the sound of it.

He followed Agent Sam Stein (a man who wasn’t really Billy’s biggest fan) into the room. His instincts took over for a few seconds, and his eyes darted around the room—checking for exits and vulnerable spots in the hotel—before they landed on you.

Your eyes were wide, but Billy kept his reaction in check. You looked good, wearing a simple white T-shirt, black hoodie, and jeans. He preferred you in nothing, in all honesty, but he pushed those thoughts—and images—down. He was here on a job, after all.

“Y/N, this is Billy Russo, head of Anvil Security,” Stein said, not noticing the tension in the room, or at the very least, ignoring it, “Mr. Russo will be your bodyguard for the foreseeable future.”

You didn’t say anything, just stared up at Billy, turning to watch him as he walked past you and deeper into the room. He’d be lying if he said he’d never thought of this moment, never imagined seeing you again. He never imagined it like this, though. He turned back to you, all business. “We’re going to a safe house,” he told you, “and from there, we’ll make a long-term plan for your safety. Are you ready to leave?”

You nodded wordlessly.

Billy went over to the bed to grab your bag, but stopped when he got to the edge of it. The sheets were rumpled, and the covers were haphazardly thrown on the bed. His mind flashed back to a time when his sheets looked like that after spending hours intertwined with you, still smelling like you days after.

“Billy,” you had gasped out, back arched as your orgasm rocked you, “Billy!”

He grunted on top of you, pushing deeper into you and closing his eyes as you pulsated around him. You felt so good, so incredibly good. Billy dropped his head, burying his face in your neck as he came with you, calling your name just as you were calling his.

Still inside you, still wrapped up in you, he opened his eyes and stared down at you. Your eyes were closed, mouth open as you panted, sweat making your skin glow, and your hair was a mess on his pillows. He had never seen anything more beautiful, and he felt a sudden wave of possessiveness take over. No other man deserved you, no other man should be able to see you, feel you, the way he did. This was where you belonged; beneath him, cocooned in his arms, sheets damp under your body and blanket thrown over the mattress, forgotten and unneeded as you warmed each other.

You opened your eyes, smiling up at Billy, and he felt himself smiling back, felt his heart melt at the sight of you—all his in that one moment.

Billy wasn’t sure what this was, this thing between the two of you, and a part of him was urging him to face reality—this could never work, he could never tell you the truth about himself, could never truly let you in, but… In that moment…damn did he want to.

“Hey,” you said, poking his nose with your finger, “Stop thinking, Russo, and kiss me.”

He did. And later, in the morning, when he woke up with you in his arms and his comforter on the floor, sheets a mess, he kissed you again.

He could kiss you forever.

Billy turned back to you, slinging the duffel bag over his shoulder. The memory came out of nowhere, just as vivid and real as it had been then, and he licked his lips, chasing the memory of your sweet, sweet kiss. You were still staring at him, pretty eyes wide and lips parted, ready, he thought, to be kissed. The logical side of him told him to focus on the mission, to just do the job, but the other part of him wanted nothing more than to grab you and tell you everything would be okay. To push you onto the bed and ruin the sheets just a bit more.

…This might be harder than he thought it’d be.

*******************************************************************************************

Okay, who’s POV should the next chapter be in? Billy’s or the Reader’s? And what did you think of this part? Did you like it? Do you know who the informant was? Do we trust Homeland? Do we trust Billy?! Are we even trustworthy?! *dun dun!*

Helpless Taglist (let me know if you’d like to be added or removed): @accioromancff @funerals-with-cake @700teacups @thesumofmychoices @wangmangagavroche @aikeia @im-a-mess-ness @fangirlharbor

Taglist: @lexxierave @loveintheroyalfamily@suchatinyinfinity@fanfictionrecommendations-com  @maxslime-blog @elanor-of-imladris@songforhema @lucielandss @fandomlifeandeverythingelse @themadhatter92@realduckvader @the-blind-assassin-12 @christinawxxx @anabella-baby @blackcoffeeandgreenteaforme @luminex3 @littlemermaidprobz@ashkuuuu @luckysstrikes @carlaangel86 @floralpeaceofmind @dylanobrusso @teacuplotus @iaintnofurry @thesumofmychoices @ymariejp @its-my-little-dumpster-fire @mrsjaxtellerfan @whovianayesha @holamor @drinix @rhabakoli @stories-you-wont-hear @king4thesirens @starkrobb @marauderskeeper @charlylama @thesandbeneathmytoes @something-tofightfor @banditthewriter  @binbons-is-theloml  @thebabblingbookworm @khuangpu13

[sharperthewriter]

Chapter 14 of SFV

Chapter 14: Day 1: The Bumblebees Incident

(4:45pm)

The van finally reached the exit to North Platte, NE, but not without suffering more damage. The right side of the van had a couple more dents and scrapes, the hubcap on the right rear wheel was gone, the rear windshield was cracked in the rear, half of the front grille was gone, and the front bumper coming loose and flapping. The car was also covered in syrup, dirt, and prairie grass. This was in addition to the damage of the driver side mirror and the scraping of the left side of the vehicle against the SUV at the Bueno Nacho from earlier. The trailer also had dents on the top and both sides as well.

The clouds, in the meantime, were starting to gather.

"And here we are, Stoppables, North Platte, Nebraska!" Ron exclaimed. "Remind me never to say that phrase 'And nothing will go wrong' ever again!"

Rufus groaned over his owner's poor driving and trashing of the car. Though...the worst was yet to come.

Kim observed the place and said, "Looks like a smaller version of Middleton."

"So now that it's close to five pm, what do you want to do?" Ron asked.

"We'll check into the hotel first and get two rooms. A suite for us and the kids and a room for Mary and Canna" Kim insisted, . "And then we'll get ready to eat at the Bumblebees here."

"I'm right with ya on that strategy, KS!" Ron replied before turning to Rufus. "Now Rufus, watch the kids while Kim and I check in the hotel."

Rufus saluted while his owners went into the hotel lobby.

"We're here for our room." Ron said.

The hotel clerk said to them. "It's room 296, on the other end of the property. As for your other room it's going to be room 294 right next door"

Kim grabbed the hotel key and said, "Thanks! It's so not the drama!"

They parked the van right at the end of the property. Mary and Canna got out of the camper. They also got their suitcases out and, like Kim, they were filled with long denim overalls.

(6:45pm)

The room was actually a suite in which there was a pull-out couch and the kitchenette in one room and the bedroom in the other. The kids were going to occupy the couch while the Stoppable parents had the bedroom. Mary and Canna had a normal hotel room with two twin beds.

Ron and Kim chose the suite for more extra...privacy. As for Rufus, they brought along a small naked mole rat bed for him. Rufus got a little apron bib ready to take on the nachos.

"Okay, Ron." Kim called out from the bathroom. "I'm going to make some changes to my button-down shirt and then we'll go with the kids to the restaurant."

"Alright, KS! Let's see what you look like!" Ron said with anticipation.

Kim loosened the top two buttons to show off a little more cleavage and a b. She also added a couple of long gold and silver chain necklaces to her jewelry and replaced her teardrop earrings with gold hoops. She also swapped out her flats for black booties with a heel on them.

Kim also removed the top side buttons on both side to the leather overalls she was wearing.

Rufus gave a wolf-whistle as well.

"Ooooo! Very nicey! Me like!" Ron grinned devilishly, "The looks are just one thing of your complete package, KS!"

"Why thanks, Ron! Round up the kids and get to the van!" Kim replied "We're going to head to Bumblebees!"

Alexa and Justin were watching Baloney on the TV on their side of the suite before Kim instructed them to turn it off.

Mary and Canna also came out of their hotel room next door. They were in the same outfits as before, but decided together that they were going to wear their dark denim overalls with the bib down but straps attached route and a belt to hold them up and wear simple white tennis shoes.

"You know..." Kim remarked at the way the two women were wearing the overalls. "...I could go for that look on one of the days."

"As long as the belt doesn't fail on you, Kim, you should be good!" Mary remarked.

(15 minutes later)

The sky above them was slowly growing more dark and ominous. The storms were going to appear within a matter of hours.

Kim was at the drivers' seat of the Stoppable-mobile, starting up the engine.

The NWS broadcast was on the radio, informing the two heroes of what was to come.

The National Weather Service of Hastings Nebraska, has issued a Severe Thunderstorm Watch for the eastern portion of Nebraska until 2:30am. Wind gusts of up to 70 mph, rain up to 2-3 inches, and hail up to the size of golf balls is expected with this line of system of storms. Stay weather-alert.

"I think we still should head on over to Bumblebees!." Kim said, "The kids are starting to get cranky for their food."

"As long as they have a vegan menu, we'll be good!" Canna replied.

"Vegan and gluten-free too!" Mary agreed.

(7:15pm)

The Stoppables, Mary and Canna entered into the restaurant. Kim's overall strap was barely hanging onto her shoulder.

She asked the waitress, "Do you have a table for six?"

"Plus one naked mole rat?" Ron asked with Rufus popping out of his pocket.

"Food!" he squeaked.

"We do, Mrs. Stoppable, yes!" the waitress said, "Would you like a table or booth?"

"We prefer the booth!" Kim replied.

"Right this way." the waitress replied to them while getting coloring books and crayons for both Alexa and Justin. She then escorted them to a booth in the middle of the restaurant.

Kim, Ron, and Justin sat on the left side of the booth while Mary, Canna, and Alexa sat on the right.

"Here we are! Your server will be out in a few minutes!" she said before leaving the Stoppables.

(5 more minutes later)

"So what's the general game plan that you're suggesting, Ron?" Kim asked her husband.

"I'd say that once we get to Rapid City, we're going to go for Mt. Rushmore first." Ron replied, pulling up the map of South Dakota on his smart phone.

"But that is a good almost-ten-hour round-trip across almost the entire state!" Kim countered. "Justin and Alexa really do want to see the bears at Bear Country USA.

"Don't worry, KS. We'll stop and get some food and gas on the way there." Ron said as the waitress came to their table.

"Welcome to Bumblebees! What can I get you two to drink?"

"I'll have a cola and my bon-diggety wife here will have a diet tea." Ron said, "The oldest one will have a fruity soda as well."

"Okay, I'll be right out there with your drinks!" the server said.

"So where is the Oh Boyz concert going to be at?" Mary asked.

"Sanford Premiere Center in Sioux Falls!" Kim replied, "It's even got a wine bar!"

"So that's another reason why you wanna go to the concert!" Ron slyly replied.

"Who was your favorite Oh Boyz member?" Canna questioned.

"Hands down, Dexter for his...smarts!" Kim recalled. "It was the time that we saved them from the Senors and that weasel of a manager of theirs."

(10 more minutes later)

"Oooh, it seems that Sheila has sent me a text!" Kim said when she felt a buzz on her phone. She went through her handbag and as she did so, her overalls strap slipped off her shoulder.

It read the following:

Princess,

I found something on PictoGram that you may would want to see. The directors of that live-action movie about you is going to drop some big news tomorrow.

Your friend

Sheila.

"Hmm...it's about time someone released something for that live-action movie." she said, "It's been three months since there was any news about it."

"Maybe they'll keep her plasma powers intact." Ron wondered.

"I think they'll maybe keep the blue skin of Drakken." Kim laughed as the strap was now on her elbow. "Ah, here are our drinks right now!"

The server came to their table and awaited their orders.

"My husband would have the nachos supreme, same with our naked mole rat here, and I would like a Caesar salad." Kim said, "The kids would like to have two grilled cheese sandwiches. As for Canna and Mary, they'll both have the casesar salad too."

"Coming right up." the server said, leaving the table.

"So what else do you wanna talk about?" she asked, pulling the overalls strap back up.

"Maybe the weather?" Ron said while looking out the window.

"That's so the oldest conversation starter in the book!" Kim chuckled.

"No, KS. The weather's gonna go south in a few hours." Ron exclaimed while pointing it out on the doppler. He could see a lot of red associated with the storm, which meant really heavy rainfall. "A really bad storm's headed our way! With big hail and everything! That's what the NWS says!"

"It's so not the drama!" Kim said, blowing off the storm.

"What about the Stoppable-mobile?" Ron asked.

"Rest assured, Ron." Kim reassured him, "The van will make it to the Lipskys!"

(30 more minutes later)

"Oh man... I am stuffed!" Ron exclaimed, holding his stomach. He had already paid for the food.

"I'm glad that I brought along my baggy overalls for the trip." Kim said. "That'll offset whatever pounds I'll put on at the Lipskys."

Kim added as she was standing up. "I'm going to use the ladies' room, Ron. You and Rufus watch the kids!"

"Sure do, KS!" Ron replied.

"Uh-huh!" Rufus squeaked.

Kim left the booth, grabbed her purse, and headed towards the ladies restroom.

(4 more minutes later)

Kim got out of the restroom and she was somewhere between the borderline of angry and embarassed. The rest of the restaurant's patrons were laughing and pointing at her. The servers couldn't help but chortle at her predictament. Even worse was that some of the said patrons were holding up their smartphones, taking pictures and video.

Three of the waiters were then tripped by one occupant of the restaurant near where the Stoppables were at. This resulted in her being drenched with soda and covered in ketchup, mustard, mayonnaise, barbecue ribs, chocolate and ice cream all over the front of her one-strap black leather overalls.

"Oh hey...uhm...KS! You look more scrumptious than usual." Ron chuckled nervously.

"Ron...this is so the most embarassing moment of my life!" Kim growled. "I want you to cover my back!"

"Covering your back? I thought you only said that on missions!" Ron said.

Kim groaned and turned her back to Ron to point out the reason why. The right back pocket of the overalls was torn out, showing off Kim's Pandaroo panties and a bit of her back leg.

Rufus, Justin and Alexa couldn't help but laugh. Mary and Canna also joined in on the fun by also taking pictures and video.

"Why couldn't we do that?" Justin asked.

"You're doing what Daddy does!" Alexa giggled.

Ron gasped and asked, "How did that happen?"

"Bathroom door lever got caught against my pocket and...this happened!" Kim grunted with all the chocolate syrup and ice cream dripping off of her.

Rufus was even taking video of this too on his very small smartphone. Ron sighed at his mole rat and said "Why do they even sell small smartphones to mole rats is even beyond me."

"Let's just get out of here before I make a bigger joke of myself!" Kim insisted.

Ron covered up the damaged part of her overalls by him grabbing her behind with his left hand.

Kim sighed, "Why do I even bother?"

"Sorry, show's over! Turn off your smartphones! Nothing to see here!" Ron exclaimed.

Justin, Mary, Canna, Alexa and Rufus followed them out of the restaurant.

"Do you have any duct tape, Ron?" Kim asked when they got in the van.

"I do, in the glove compartment." Ron replied while going to the glove compartment and pulling out the duct tape.

"These overalls cost me $800 from Country CB and now they're ruined!" Kim complained, "I'll have to sew them when we get back home..."

Kim then applied the duct tape to her behind and started the car. The damaged van crept out of the parking lot and headed back to the hotel.

Flashes of lightning were seen in the distance as the storms were heading this way to make the family's night even worse.

The man who tripped over the waiters grinned and spoke through a microphone.

"My Queen, the show has just begun!"

About 200 miles away, Bonnie was enjoying the misery of the Stoppable through her big screen at her mansion.

"Good! Very good!" the Queen snickered, "We'll let the Vacation Curse take its full effect on the family!

"What of the Stoppable-mobile, though?" the man asked.

"We'll put that piece of shit of a minivan through the coals soon enough!" Bonnie grinned, "Now, you will await further orders for the next phase of my plan!"

"Yes, Your Majesty!" the man obeyed.

[punchmedanny]

Chicago II July 25, 2018

Alright strap yourselves in cuz this is gonna be a long ass post WITH SPOILERS for Interactive Introverts. I will mark where spoilers begin if you want to read about pre show stuff. If you don't want any spoilers whatsoever, don't feel obligated to read this even if we're buddies! Feel free to send me an ask/dm instead 😅

Alright folks, let's go!

Playing the Waiting Game

I was supposed to get to the venue at 4 for m&g, but I got there before 3 because a) i'm terrified of being late and b) my uber driver made excellent time.

The venue was not open yet, so my bf and I walked to a nearby mall. We passed by the tour buses (presumably dnp's plus other performers'). There was a group of people hanging around them looking v stalkerish (please don't hang around the buses before the show)

We got back to venue around 3:50 and waited in line outside till 4 when the venue let us in. We were near the middle of the line, so if you want to be closer to the front, get there sooner lol

Turns out I was behind the lovely @noodlephil in line (although I didn’t know till after!)

Two internet friends were meeting for the first time and crying (it was adorable)

Inside, there was a table with staff that checked and marked our tickets then gave us silver paper wristbands

We got in a second line where we had a bag check (our venue allowed sealed water bottles, but that might vary) and were scanned by a wand metal detector. After that, staff scanned our tickets 

We went to a third line which was the actual line for m&g and were told the m&g itself would start around 4:30

Marianne came by and said we would be waiting a bit longer for "latecomers" (im p sure dnp were the latecomers because most people were there at that point haha)

Marianne walked like a frickin goddess and her voice was beautiful

She made a speech giving us a rundown of how m&g would work, which I recorded

The m&g area was set up in the lobby to the side of the theatre doors

Dan and Phil entered from our left (towards the back of the theate)

They jogged across the m&g backdrop where we could see them better and waved. Dan did the cutest bouncy jump ever while waving. He stayed out longer than Phil

There was a table to set your bag on as you approached the backdrop

The music was loud af and there was NO WAY to see or hear other people's m&g - it was v private even though there were tons of people

Marianne was at the very front of the line and asked what she could do to help. I was like uhhh (because I'm eloquent like that) and she asked if we had anything for them to sign. My bf had golf balls lmao and gave them to her. I said I wanted to take a Polaroid for them to sign. She had me turn the camera on because apparently they’d had issues with Polaroid cameras in the past

I thanked her for the way everything was being run and joked a bit while we waited

When it was our turn, the people in front of us were completely gone (I repeat: v private). Marianne gestured and verbally told us to go on in

Meeting Dan and Phil

Phil was wearing his red jacket and good vibes t-shirt just like the beginning of "week in the life" He welcomed us with open arms and I went in for the Phil Hug. Wow. Phil is an excellent hugger and his arms felt a lot stronger than I imagined. And, yes, he waited for me to let go first

As soon as I let go of Phil, I stepped to the side and and looked at Dan. He was wearing his II denim jacket over a white t-shirt. He also had his arms wide for a hug. And lemme tell you, that boi has a fuckin wingspan. Dan gave a more gentle hug than Phil and we let go at like the same time

I am not a hugger and wasnt even 100% sure before I went in that I would hug them tbh

After the hugs, I stepped back and took them both in that's what she said. My initial impression was confidence and class. Literally, the most confident people I've ever encountered irl

Everyone says they're tall, but they are, as my bf said, taller than advertised. He's 6'2 and still looked up to both of them. I feel like they're both close to the next inch up honestly

They are wide. Like we've all noticed the Phil is wide, but Dan is too! They are literal giants

The cameras do NOT do them justice. Phil looks his age irl and I mean that in the sexiest way possible. He does actually have pores and tiny wrinkles (gasp), but I think they only make him more attractive. He oozes understated masculinity. But he also has serious nerd energy and idgaf attitude. Basically, he seems kind of badass

Dan looked flawless. Like I know every so often people wonder about if he wears makeup and all imma say is either he does OR he has the best damn skin care routine and/or genetics ever. He looks like someone after they use a filter

I'd say dan is suave and phil has swagger

(I'm about to sound real fucking weird) They both had such strong auras or energy or whatever you want to call it. It was palpable and BIG - like it extended off of them a couple feet. Dan's felt more static-y, while phil's felt more like balloon about to burst. It merged together between them to where I couldn't tell where one stopped and the other started

Marianne handed Phil the golf balls and he and Dan just stared at them in his hand in confusion for a second then Phil said "golf balls?" before my bf explained it was because they were the caddy lads. They chuckled and Dan said it was "the only series that has any value"

I am now the proud (?) owner of photos and video of phil holding two balls in his hand and I feel really weird about it

Dan asked if I had anything for them to sign, so I told him I wanted to take a Polaroid to which Dan replied, "D'ya want me to attempt the rare Polaroid selfie?"

Then I actually gently teased Dan (!?!?) because I'm a little shit lol I said, "I successfully did one this morning, so I hope you can"

They both seemed mildly amused and he did the thing where he touched his chest lightly in mock offense and said, "Well, let's see"

Tbh I think this was why I got genuine smiles in my pic

Dan said, "Beautiful" and Phil said "Amazing" lol (it really was tho)

Dan described the signature he'd be doing as "the tiniest little dan" and he used the highest voice ever

Phil's signature was so bad im pretty sure dan laughed at it lmao

Dan offered another selfie with my phone (i love him)

I shook their hands before I left and they seemed surprised, but appreciative. They both had excellent handshakes: firm, but not too hard. They both had soft, warm hands with Phil's being about average and Dan's being warmer than average

Overall, they were incredibly kind and professional. The vibe to be was sort of like talking to a boss who isn't your direct boss at a work party: fun, but still guarded

The saying goes "Never meet your heroes," but whoever said that obviously never met dan and phil. This was one of my happiest memories of all time

1500+ word description of the meeting including a sommelier worthy account of how the boys smell

And here’s the (real shit) video of my m&g

The Pre-Show

After meeting the bois, we were immediately given our goodie bags (one of them was double stuffed, lucky me)

Staff asked if we’d be staying in the theatre or not. Upon telling them we’d be leaving, they let us know we’d need to scan out so we could re-enter later

We bought merch (tie-dye/marbled look tee, long sleeved tee, and denim jacket). The line was basically non-existant, so if you have VIP 100% get your merch at this time

We scanned out and were told we could re-enter at 6 along with general admittance ticket holders

We had dinner then got back around 6:10. There was no line this time and we went through security and ticket scanning again

There were so many people everywhere and everyone was so cute! Why are we such a good looking fandom??? The line for merch was EXTREMELY long. RIP those folks

So was the line for the restrooms (and multiple men’s rooms were turned into ladydoors women’s restrooms)

We got 2 drinks (both for me) then went to our seats. We were front and center - I could literally touch the stage with my shoe from my seat. At this time I met @phandommom and @crunchytoasted1

The pre-show music was loud af where I was seated (I actually put in ear plugs lol). Lots of people were dancing and I got to witness crunchytoast dance to “Ladydoor” live which was a treat. At one point various people were running across the theatre with various LGBT+ flags to plenty of cheers. ‘Twas glorious. People did the whole waving the phone flashlights thing and sang along during “Welcome to the Black Parade”

My bf got me 2 more drinks

Showtime! 

THIS IS WHERE THE SPOILERS START!!!

It was so, so weird to see them onstage after having the m&g. I legit wanted to climb onstage and like be close again, but, ya know, I didn’t cuz I know what’s socially acceptable

We were called Susan. Classic

Phil was wearing waffle socks. As in socks with tiny waffles all over them

We sacrificed Phil to Satan and Dan died in a furry nightclub

None of mine or my bf’s answers got chosen and I’m a bit salty lol

We sacrificed Dan (the only correct choice fite me)

At intermission the line for the bathrooms was sooooo long omg. I got myself 2 more drinks at this point and called @h-owllslide to gush about the show. I spilled one of my drinks on my bf a little when I sat back down.

Danny was 3 centimeters away from loosing his dick and he got paint on his shoe. He seemed legit irked lol

Nick Jonas was in Dan’s box, but I don’t recall the other two cuz that was the only one that mattered imo

I got a piece of the sign and when they threw it into the audience it was a bit disturbing how everyone tore into it like a swarm of pirahnas

They wore Cubs baseball shirts over their usual shirts during the rap/song finale which was absolutely precious. I LOVED the finale so fucking much - it was magnificent

END SPOILERS!!!

Closing Thoughts

I wish I hadn’t drank so much (6 wines for those of you keeping track at home). I was getting real embarrassing by the end (as in screaming excitedly too much/ too often) and I don’t remember it as clearly as I wish I did. I was just freaking tf out and my anti-anxiety meds weren’t cutting it

I was struggling incredibly hard not to disassociate the entire time

I wish I could go to another show. It was so fun!

The following day, I had a major mood drop. If you’re prone to this, maybe have a plan to hang with someone and do something nice, but lowkey the next day

This was literally the most fun thing I’ve done in at least two years and was one of my happiest memories ever. We’re talking patronus conjuring levels of happy

If you can go, go. If you can’t, don’t feel too bad. It was EXTREMELY intense and not for everyone (especially m&g). Plus they are putting it up later, which I’m looking forward to because I think I’ll be able to better absorb it

Please feel free to ask me anything about the show! I’d love to go on about it lol

[bazypitchandsimonsnow]

Coming Home

Rating: T

Genre: Fluff

Word count: 4326

Summary: Simon Snow arrives home from work to his messy, tired, amazing family. Based on "a nap" request.

Read on AO3

AN: So this is the request I misread. I got the number wrong and thought it was first kiss, not nap. But it's all good because I had this idea immediately and it's very fluffy and cute. I love kid fics and always looking for an excuse to write more. Enjoy!

———————————————-

Simon

When I get home, I expect to hear the oven going and Baz’s classical music playing as he cooks. He bragged this morning about trying a brand new roast beef recipe he found online. Ever since staying at home, he’s been obsessed with online cooking videos, even though he’s usually too tired to actually make them. But he was very determined this morning, shouting about it from the other room while was trying to wrestle Tasha into her overalls.

But as I enter the flat, there is zero violin music, or oven whirring, or even baby cries. Wow, this place hasn’t been quiet in eleven months. (Coincidentally the age of our daughter.) Maybe they’re out for a walk. Baz takes Tasha out a lot. He tends to get stir crazy when he’s stuck inside for too long. The trials of a stay at home dad.

“Baz?” I say, very quietly in case Tasha is asleep but just loud enough for Baz to hear. Thank Crowley for a husband with vampire hearing. There’s no answer though. Huh.

I carefully place my bag next to the entrance, then take off my shoes. As I walk down the hall, I navigate around Tasha’s many toys left strewn about. Baz says she gets her messiness from me. I always remind him that she is a baby. I bend my head around the corner into the living room, and my heart instantly melts.

No wonder Baz isn’t in the kitchen. He’s right there, sprawled out on his back on the couch with messy hair and lazy clothes. He’s sleeping very lightly if his rapid eye movement is any clue. His right arm is hanging off the edge with some thick book in it while his other is on his chest. Or more accurately, placed lightly on Tasha’s back as she sleeps on top of him. She’s dressed in that duck onesie she loves so much, laying completely still and snoring softly. She looks like an adorable little freckled bean topped with a mess of tiny black curls. And they look far too adorable for words. I can’t help put snap a picture on my phone. Looks like I’ve got a new lock screen.

I walk over and kneel near his face. I put a piece of hair behind his ear. Apparently, that’s too much, because it startles him awake instantly. He inhales sharply as his eyes fly open, all his muscles tensing. I put a soothing hand on his shoulder.

“Hey, hey,” I whisper, “it’s alright, it’s just me. Tasha’s fine.”

He runs a hand down his face. “Sorry. I was reading and I shouldn’t have fallen asleep with her like this. It’s not safe-”

“Shhh, it’s fine. You’re a light sleeper. If she had moved you would’ve felt it. Besides,” I look at the sleeping baby with a grin, “you two look really cute.”

He sighs, but I can hear his smile. “Thank you. Though I think she’s the more adorable one between the two of us.”

“Hm, I love you, but I have to agree.”

“Aw, I’m so hurt,” he deadpans. He runs a hand up and down her small back. She yawns adorably, shifting against him, flexing her tiny hand. I put my hand under it, and her fingers curl around mine. Aleister Crowley, I never knew my heart could feel so full.

“How was your day?” I ask quietly.

“Quiet,” he replies. “Tasha and I watched some Postman Pat, then we went to the park, where she attempted to eat dirt again.”

“She’s curious.”

“She’s going to get sick.”

“Then luckily her Papa is a wizard, and a very good one.”

He chuckles softly. “True, thank Merlin. Well, after stopping her from eating dirt, she played with that Tyler kid. They still get along very well. Though his mother is also still relentless in her pursuit of me.”

I sigh, instinctively placing a protective/possessive hand on his arm. “I don’t know what else we can tell her. You’ve said you’re gay, and married, and not ever leaving me. She must tune us out to stare at your face.”

“What can I say, Snow? I’m irresistible.”

“Hm, don’t I know it.” I push my nose against his neck, and revel in the sigh Baz lets out. “Did you two have fun though?”

“Yeah, definitely. We usually have fun.” He makes a strange noise, somewhere between wistful and sad. “I can’t believe I’m supposed to go back to work in a month. It’s going to be so...weird.”

“Good weird or bad weird?”

He shrugs, a habit he’s reluctantly picked up from me. “Sort of both. Of course I love being with Tasha, and I’ll worry about her non-stop when she’s not right next to me. But it’ll be nice to talk to actual adults regularly again.”

“You see me everyday. Am I not an actual adult?”

Baz, my wonderful husband, gives me a deadpan look that silently says, “what do you think?” I return a large grin and kiss his cheek. He softens immediately.

“So, no fancy roast beef tonight?”

“Ugh.” His head falls back against the throw pillow. “Yeah, that’s not happening. After the park, Tasha had lunch and passed out on me while I was reading. It was too cruel to move, obviously.”

“Obviously. Want me to whip something together while she keeps resting?”

“No, no, it’s still my turn. And Tasha’s slept the whole afternoon, she’s fine. You take the baby, I’ll make spaghetti.”

“Huh, that rhymes. You’re a poet and you didn’t even know it, love.”

“Yeah, you’re not adult.”

I glare at him, but when he kisses my cheek, I immediately soften. He carefully lifts Tasha as he sits up. She starts to wake, dark blue eyes blinking up at Baz, and I can see the moment she recognises him. I love the little smile she makes.

“Papa,” she coos, reaching out to him, pawing at his face. He grins brightly.

“Good morning, little puff,” he says softly. “You had a nice nap, didn’t you? Yes you did.”

She giggles and grabs his long nose. She’s got a thing for noses, unfortunately. Baz winces when she inevitably grips too hard. He slowly pries her hand off.

“Her strength gives mine a run for it’s money,” he says with amusement and exasperation. “Take her before she tries to rip it off again?”

“Of course.” he passes her off to me. Tasha immediately goes for my nose this time. I try to pull my face away but it’s no use.

“Dada!” she shrieks, then babbles at me in her random made up words.

“Hi, lovely girl. Missed you all day.” I bring her closer, and get a whiff of what’s obviously in her nappy. “Whoo! Someone’s stinky.”

“Ha!” Baz shouts from the kitchen. “I’ve changed two nappies today. Your turn, Snow.”

I flip him off as I pass by with Tasha on my shoulder. She’s trying to gnaw on my shirt. Teething has been a very fun time.

I carefully place Tasha on the changing table. It’s very hard to change her nappy when she keeps trying to eat her own toes. I want to be annoyed, but it’s hard when she’s looking at me with big, beautiful blue eyes.

“Yeah, you’re cute and you know it.” I lean down and blow raspberries on her stomach. She shrieks and giggles, but also grabs my hair a little too hard. I pull away slowly. “Ow, ow. Papa is right, you’re very strong, love. We’ll have to teach you to use your powers for good.”

She burbles and goes back to sucking her own toe. My mobile buzzes in my back pocket, as I’ve been waiting for it to all day. I put a hand on Tasha to keep her steady while I check.

Penelope: Talked to Micah. He’s cool with ur idea. Talked to your vamp?

Simon: Not yet. Will at supper. Check out these cuties I came home to tho <3

Simon: [sent a photo attachment]

Penelope: Awwwww tired puppies huh?

Simon: Pooped from playing at the park and fending off single mums respectively

Penelope: Lol Baz needs “gay and married” tattooed across his forehead.

Simon: Yeah I thought the wedding ring did that

Penelope: Obvs not.

Penelope: It’s midnight here so I’m off to bed. Night Simon!

Simon: Night Pen <3

I pocket my phone and go back to my self-cannibalistic daughter. She’s gnawing on her big toe quite vigorously. I sigh and carefully pull it away from her mouth.

“That’s not gonna work, sweetheart,” I say kindly.

She smiles anyway, because of course she does. Tasha is a very happy kid. I hope she stays so throughout her life, and I’ll make sure she gets the chance. Her childhood is never going to be as scary as mine. It can’t be perfect, of course, but it won’t involve any group homes or super villains or civil wars. I promised her that the day she was born. I’m not ever going to break it.

“Shitty supper is ready!” Baz shouts.

I sigh and do Tasha’s onesie back up. With her on my shoulder, I walk into the dining room to see Baz setting out plates.

“You really shouldn’t swear around her,” I say. “She’s going to pick it up.”

“She’s not even a year old. It’s fine.”

“Fuck!” Tasha chirps right on cue. I give Baz a pointed look. He goes wide eye, then clears his throat and looks down.

“Okay, maybe she’s learning,” he says reluctantly.

I walk up and kiss his ear. He flushes instantly “Of course she is. She’s smart, like her Papa.”

He scoffs, but keeps on blushing. “Smooth, Snow. C’mon, let’s eat.”

Getting Tasha into her high chair is always a production. She’s stubborn and fidgety as anything, and hates being strapped into something so she can’t move. She squirms away from me and hits my face with her small hands.

“Darling, you have to sit in your chair,” I sigh.

“No!” she yells back.

“If you want to eat, you have to sit.”

“No! No no no!”

Crowley, fighting goblins and a chimera is nothing compared to a baby with sharp fingernails. After a lot of slaps and screams and scratches, I finally wrangle her into her chair. She pouts and glares at me. (It’s scary how much she looks like Baz when she does that. She really does learn a lot from him.) I sit down with a heavy sigh. When I look at Baz, he’s smirking as he places down the plates.

“What’s so amusing, Basil?” I ask with a slight edge.

“Just watching you get a taste of your own medicine,” he says, sounding annoyingly smug.

“Oh? And what’s that supposed to mean?”

“You’ve finally met someone as stubborn as you; you’re own daughter. And it’s fu- very, hilarious.”

I roll my eyes  “Shut up, arsehole.”

“Language, Snow. For the baby’s sake.” He grins around his fork, pointing his spoon at the eleven month old currently smashing steamed carrots in her mouth.

We eat in companionable silence for awhile. It’s nice, to be quiet and let myself relax. It doesn’t last long though, as Tasha needs help to eat her food. How human babies survive truly amazes me. She only gets about a third of the vegetables and cut up meatballs actually in her mouth. Baz attempts to clean her up and fails miserably.

“There's no use in trying, love. She'll just get dirty again," I say through the spaghetti I'm currently eating.

“I can bloody well try,” he mutters. “Merlin knows I don’t want her to learn your manners.”

“Hey! Not fair!”

“You’re currently talking with your mouth full of pasta, love.”

I wish I could protest that, but I’d have to speak with my mouth full. I settle for a Baz/Tasha style glare. He smiles back. I finish my food before I speak again. I need Baz paying full attention to what I’m saying instead of my poor manners.

“So, Baz, I’ve been talking to Penny-”

“Uh-oh, that’s never good,” he says with a smirk.

I roll my eyes, just like Penny does. “Yeah, yeah, shut up. So she and Micah would really like to take some time off, and American kids are still off school at the end of the month. And since Tasha has never seen Chicago before, maybe we could all go visit them that week.”

Baz raises a brow (he’s so good at that.) “Spend a week in Chicago, huh? So are we going to be the people who bring a baby on an airplane?” He’s smirking with a playful glint in his grey eyes. Bastard. I shrug in the most sarcastic way I can.

“Well, unless you want to leave our eleven month old baby alone with someone while we’re out of the country, Mr. Overprotective, then yes.”

Baz chuckles. “I suppose a trip before I go back to work would be nice. And Bunce keeps saying she wants to see Tasha more.”

“And Tasha wants to see her!” I turn to Tasha with a big grin. “You wanna go see Auntie Penny, huh Tasha? Wanna see Auntie Penny and Uncle Micah and little Lucy and Harold?”

Tasha shrieks excitement. She jumps up and down and burbles, spraying vegetables and meat everywhere. I’m not sure she fully understands (Baz knows more about child development than me) but I like seeing her smile anyway. Even if she gets half chew green bean on my face.

“I think we’re all in agreement then,” Baz says as he flicks carrot off his cheek.

“Wonderful! I’ll text Penny tomorrow.” I lean in to Tasha, tickling her stomach. She giggles and pushes at my hands. “We’re going to Chicago, Tasha!”

Tasha claps happily, mushing more food between her fingers.

“She’s going to need a bath, huh?”.

“M-hm.” Baz starts cleaning up everyone’s plates. “I made dinner, so have fun with that.”

I sigh. Baz keeps grinning smugly. He’s such a bastard, and I love him so much. I unstrap Tasha from her high chair. “C’mon, darling, time for a bath. Let’s try not to get Daddy completely soaked this time, alright?”

She giggles and starts playing with my hair, yelling in her usual baby gibberish as she gets me just as filthy as her. I hear Baz snort from behind me. I promptly flip him off.

“Don’t do that,” I whisper to Tasha. “Not until you’re older. I’m teaching you very bad habits, aren’t I?”

“Dada,” Tasha burbles with her big baby grin. She wraps her arms around her neck, hugging me close. She likes hugging and physical affection in general. Baz says she gets it from me.

Maybe I’m teaching her bad habits, but I’m teaching her good ones too. Guess that’s parenthood.

———————————————-

“And they all lived happily ever after,” I say, closing the book. “The end.”

“Again!” Tasha yells. It’s become her favourite word. We finish playing on the swings or reading a story or watching a show, it’s always “again.” She’s just a very excitable kid.

“Sweetheart, it’s bedtime.” I lift her up from my lap and walk towards the crib. She squirms as I place her down.

“No!” And that’s her second favourite word. Baz mentioned yesterday that most babies her age usually don’t even have her limited vocabulary, so Tasha’s language is advanced. He said that with a very pleased expression.

“Yes, Tasha.”

“Noooooo!”

I sigh and leave her there to scream a bit, let her get it out of her system. But when I turn off the overhead and the night light on, she immediately stops. It projects stars and moons across the ceiling. Tasha loves it. She coos and reaches out to try to touch them. I stand over the crib, just looking at her wide, curious blue eyes. I wonder what it would be like to see through those eyes. To see everything as new and beautiful. Baz says I’m sappy. I say I’m curious, just like her.

“Night night, darling,” I whisper, kissing her forehead. “Love you.”

Tasha yawns, then her head lolls to the side. I take one last look before walking out.

Baz is sitting on our bed with his book when I enter. He doesn’t look up from it though as he doesn’t need to.

“She’s asleep?” he asks quietly.

“For now,” I reply, flopping next to him with my arm over his waist. “Knowing Tasha she’ll be up in half an hour crying for a bottle.”

“Hm, very true.” He carefully closes his book and places it on his bedside table. I have my eyes closed, but I can feel him put his arm around me. His other hand plays with my hair. He feels a bit cold like always, but I don’t mind. I run hot even without my magic. So being next to him cools me down, and I warm him up. We’re perfect for each other in that way, along with others.

“I’ve been thinking,” he whispers.

“Uh oh,” I mutter, “that’s never good.”

“I’m not plotting, Snow. I haven’t ‘plotted’ since we were teenagers.”

“No, but you tend to get lost in your big head.” I tap his forehead for emphasis. “It can get scary up there.”

He chuckles, his breath brushing against my skin. “Don’t I know it.” He holds me a bit tight and it makes me worried. “To be more specific, I’ve been thinking about my mother. What with the anniversary coming up and everything,”

My eyes fly open. Oh shit. I scoot up so we’re face to face. Baz’s face looks impassive, but I’ve been with him for over ten years, and I’ve known for even longer. I can see that it’s just an attempt to hold back the sadness and anxiety he’s feeling.

“Right. It’s next week.”

“Yes, it is,” he sighs. “It’s been awhile since the anniversary has felt this looming. But I’ve been thinking about her a lot this year. And not just because we named Tasha after her. I wonder a lot if she thought the same things about me I think about Tasha. If she’s feeling okay, if she’s healthy, if I’m messing her up too much.”

“Baz.” I hold his chin, making him look me right in the eye. “You’re not messing Tasha up, I promise.”

He chuckles and pulls my hand away, shaking his head. “No no, I probably am. Father says every parent fucks up their child. It’s just the degree that varies. Daphne concurred. My mother probably would’ve said the same thing.”

I humph, gripping his hand tightly. The metal of his wedding ring is a ressuaring feeling against my skin. “Well, I think you’re doing a wonderful job.”

His face softens, half his mouth pulled up. And I consider that a victory. “Thank you, love.”

I lean up and kiss him, because he looks so cute and I bloody well need to now. Plus I haven’t kissed him since I got home. That’s a wrong I can’t let stand. He curls his hand around my cheek, cradling me like I’m special. I suppose I am though, special to him. That thought just makes me kiss him harder. He holds my other cheek as I roll on top of him. He pushes up my shirt and I go for his trousers.

Then Tasha starts wailing.

Baz and I both pull away with heavy sighs. Penny warned us that babies destroy sex lives and we didn’t believe her. But she was right, as usual.

“I’ll get her,” he says. “You get the bottle?”

“Yeah, will do. Pick this up later?” I smirks, and he copies me.

“We’ll see. Now get off me, please.”

“As you wish.”

I roll off him (reluctantly) and scoot to the edge. One big stretch later, I’m walking down the hall with Baz. He turns off at Tasha’s room while I go to the kitchen. Heating up the bottle is easy enough. I’ve done it a lot over the past year, so it takes just five minutes. But by the time I get to Tasha’s room, Tasha is mostly calm again. Baz is rocking her back and forth in the chair. He’s softly singing some lullaby as she whimpers.

“There there,” he whispers, “you’re alright, little puff.”

She hiccups and curls into him. I walk in and sit on the chair arm, lifting the bottle up to Tasha. She drinks it happily. I place my cheek on Baz’s hair. I feel Baz’s other hand on my knee.

“Y’know,” he whispers, “I can’t help but also wonder what my mother think of us right now. What would happen if she got to meet Tasha.”

I lean a bit closer. “I know what happen.”

“Oh really? You can see other realities now, Snow?”

“No, but I can imagine. She’d be here all the time, cooing over Tasha, helping us out, giving us unsolicited parenting advice because she was as much of a know-it-all as you.” He lets out a scoffing chuckle, because he knows it’s true. “And, she’d be really proud of you. For how you’re taking care of Tasha and the life you’ve built.”

He doesn’t answer. He reaches up to Tasha’s face and fiddles with one of her small curls, wrapping it around one of his bony finger. The exact same way he’s been doing with my hair for years. It’s incredibly sweet.

“You’re doing good, Baz,” I say firmly, “don’t ever doubt that.”

“Your grammar is still atrocious at 32, Snow,” he whispers with absolutely no contempt, then kisses my cheek. “Thank you.”

“Anytime, darling.”

“I love you.”

I lean in closer, putting one hand on Baz’s and the other on Tasha’s side. I never had a family growing up, and I never thought I’d get one, yet here I am. It’s certainly what I expected, but it’s all mine. And I wouldn’t trade it for the world.

“I love you, too.”

———————————————-

“Good morning, Simon!” Christine chirps. “What happened to you?”

Christine doesn’t give me the courtesy of letting my eye bags and dishevelled hair go without comment. She’s not great at ignoring problems, hence why she’s a good social worker.

“Baby was up at 3am,” I sigh. “I decided to be a good husband and let Baz sleep. I’m currently paying for it.”

“Yeah, your face make me glad I don’t have kids.”

I glare while Christine keeps grinning. She holds up a cup of coffee though and I soften. Whoever has caffeine is my God right now. I take a deep drink and sigh.

“Thank you, Chrissy.”

“Welcome, Simon. How is your little hellspawn doing anyway?”

“She’s good. Almost a year old now and cute as anything. Look what I came home to last night.” I pull out my phone and press the lock button. Chrissy sighs because she's used to it. Yes, I’m that annoying person who has a hundred pictures of their kid and spouse and shows them off to my boss. And right on the lock screen are Baz and Tasha fast asleep together.

“Awwwww,” Chrissy coos, only slightly sarcastic. “What sweeties.”

“I know right? They’re adorable. Also, I gotta ask you something.” She gives me a curious look. “Can I have the last week of the month off?”

“May I ask why?”

“Well, Baz’s leave is up next month. We want to do something before he’s back at work and Tasha goes to daycare. My best friend is in Chicago, so we were thinking we’d go see her and her kids that last week.”

“Ah, I see,” Christine chuckles. “You’re sneaky, Mr. Snow-Pitch. Showing me your adorable husband and daughter to butter me up for vacation time? Diabolical.”

“Hey! That’s not-”

“Sure it wasn’t.” She flashes a knowing smile at me, even though she’s wrong. (Well, she’s half wrong.) “Lucky for you, it worked. You’ve got the last week of August off. Go see your friend and frolic with your family.”

“Thank you, Chrissy!”

She waves at me dismissively. “Yeah, yeah. Just try to wrap up most of your work before you leave. Don’t want to have to fob off too many cases on others while you’re gone.”

“Will do, don’t worry.”

I watch her go into office as I take my desk. Once she’s out of sight, I take out my phone and shoot off a quick test.

Simon: Got the time off. Book the plane tickets!

Baz: Will do.

Baz: Tasha says hi.

Baz: [sent a video attachment]

I put in one earbud and open the video. It’s of Tasha, of course. I can hear Baz’s voice from behind the camera.

“Can you say hi to Daddy, Tasha?” he says. “Come on, say hi.”

Tasha looks up, blinking at it in confusion, probably thinking; that’s not Daddy, that’s Papa holding a little black box. Soon she smiles and reaches out towards it. Her pudgy little baby fingers nearly touch the lens.

“Papa,” she says.

“No no, say ‘hi’ to Daddy. You can do it. Hi. Hi!”

“Hi!” She finally chirps. “Hi hi hi!”

Baz laughs kindly and reaches out to ruffle her hair. “There you go. Good job, sweetie.”

I watch Baz’s arm scoop up Tasha. The camera switches to the front. Baz is smiling in that way he only does around Tasha and me. It’s bright and beautiful and could probably melt ice. And he calls me the sun. Tasha is burbling in gibberish, reaching towards the camera and pulling on Baz’s hair.

“Have fun at work, love,” he says. “We’ll see you when you get home.”

The video ends, freezing on my grinning husband and baby. I take a screenshot. I need a main screen phone background too. I don’t care if some people think it’s obnoxious, I want to see my family all the time. My family. The strange amazing one I always want to come home to.

Simon: See you two later <3

———————————————-

AN: Awwwww what an adorable family. I always believe that Simon and Baz would have kids and they'd be very good parents. And their kid would be a bit of nightmare because all kids are nightmares haha.

So you guys are awesome and sent me a bunch more requests. I can't wait to get to them, but just be warned I start full time work this weekend (kill me blech) so it may take awhile. I will get to them though with my free time, and I'll keep accepting new ones until the end of August. Thanks so much for the requests though. I love getting them and writing for them :) Have an awesome day everyone!

[nanenna]

Mystery Machine Mishap!

Chapter 2: Getting Prepared to be Prepared

Chapter 1 Chapter 3 Chapter 4

Fandom: Undertale Rating: General Audiences Pairing: None Summary: There was an accident at the Lab and now Papyrus is left trying to take care of Sans as a toddler while Alphys tries to figure out what went wrong and how to fix it. To say Papyrus is unprepared is not just an understatement, it’s downright fact. But Papyrus is determined to be the best big brother ever, even better than Sans is when he’s the older on.

As usual, also available to read on fanfiction.net or AO3 under the same name. (links not included because that messes with the search function)

  The next morning started even earlier than normal. Just as Papyrus was starting to think about what to make for breakfast, he heard a knocking sound from upstairs followed by little Sans’s plaintive voice. He ran up the stairs to find the toddler standing at the end of the hallway, knocking on the wall.

“daddy! daddy get up!” Sans called at the wall.

“SANS, WHAT ARE YOU…? SANS?”

Sans turned and pointed at the wall, “where daddy? daddy door gone!”

“DADDY ISN’T HOME RIGHT NOW,” Papyrus said carefully. “ARE YOU HUNGRY? I WAS ABOUT TO GO MAKE BREAKFAST, OR YOU COULD FINISH OFF THE FRIES FROM GRILLBY’S.” Papyrus flinched as he offered the fries, but since he wasn’t sure Sans would eat what Undyne had brought over he thought they would be better than nothing.

Sans rubbed an eye socket, then trundled towards Papyrus with his arms up. “hungy.”

Papyrus scooped Sans up, then carried him downstairs. One of the things Gerson had sent over was a kind of booster seat with a belt attached, something that Sans would at the very least have a hard time getting out of. Once he got Sans settled in Papyrus reminded himself he really would need to go thank Gerson in person. He bustled about the kitchen pulling options out, when he turned back to Sans he found the toddler still sitting in place and couldn’t help the relieved grin that spread across his face.

Breakfast turned out to be almost as messy an affair as dinner the night before, but since Papyrus hadn’t dressed Sans yet the clean up would be relatively easy, just wiping down his bones with a damp cloth. Once that was taken of Papyrus dressed Sans in the outfit Gerson had sent over: a green and pink striped shirt, a pair of little overalls, yellow socks, and a pair of shoes that were way too big and were eventually just left off.

“THERE, YOU LOOK SO MUCH BETTER IN CLOTHES THAT ARE ACTUALLY MEANT FOR A MONSTER OF YOUR DIMINUTIVE STATURE!” Sans fiddled with the straps of his overalls, seemingly entranced by the feel of the buttons. “NOW SANS, WE ARE GOING TO GO TO THE SHOP AND SEE ABOUT GETTING YOU A FEW MORE THINGS, LIKE SHOES THAT ACTUALLY FIT. YOU READY TO GO?”

“okay,” Sans held his arms up. Papyrus picked Sans up and settled him on a hip, then did one last check to make sure he had everything he needed. Papyrus’s phone started ringing. He pulled it out to see the caller was an unknown number.

“HELLO?”

“S-so I was just calling to l-let you know… um… I mean! Alphys here! I uh… asked Undyne for your number, I hope you don’t m-mind.”

“HELLO DR. ALPHYS,” Papyrus said cheerfully. “HOW ARE YOU THIS MORNING?”

“I’m f-fine, thanks for asking. Oh! How is Sans is he still uh… tiny?”

“SANS IS FINE AS WELL, NO CHANGES FROM LAST NIGHT THOUGH.”

“R-right, I suppose it w-was too much to hope it would wear off after a g-g-good night’s sleep. Anyway, I called to let you know that I won’t be working on the machine r-right away. I want to finish decoding th-the blueprints and notes first, t-t-to make sure there are no more accidents like with Sans. But uh… S-Sans was the one doing most of the decoding so… it might take me a while...” Alphys trailed off sadly. Just as Papyrus was about to assure her it would be fine, she picked back up. “B-but don’t worry! I’m sure I can figure this out and fix the machine and restore Sans! It might take a while, but I will do it! Okay?”

“THAT’S WONDERFUL, DR. ALPHYS. I HAVE EVERY FAITH IN YOUR ABILITIES! AFTER ALL, ANYONE WHO CAN BUILD AN AMAZING ENTERTAINMENT ROBOT LIKE METTATON WILL SURELY BE ABLE TO FIGURE OUT AND REPAIR SOME OLD MACHINE THAT CAN MYSTERIOUSLY TURN MONSTERS BACK INTO SMALL CHILDREN.”

“R-right...” Alphys didn’t sound so sure of herself.

“AND OF COURSE, IF THERE IS ANYTHING THE GREAT PAPYRUS CAN DO TO HELP YOU WOULD ASK, BECAUSE I WOULD BE MORE THAN HAPPY TO HELP IN ANY WAY I CAN.”

“About th-the uh… about the only way to help right n-n-now would be to help decode the… the notes. Are you uh… do you happen to know the cipher? Like Sans did?”

“I DID NOT EVEN KNOW SANS KNEW ANY CIPHERS OR CODES, MORE OF HIS POINTLESS SECRETS. NO, NOT YOU SANS. OLDER SANS… I KNOW IT’S WEIRD AND CONFUSING. I’M SORRY ALPHYS, I THINK I NEED TO LET YOU GO, LITTLE SANS IS GETTING CRANKY.”

“Maybe he needs a nap?” Alphys asked, unsure if toddlers took naps in the middle of the morning.

“OH, IMAGINE THAT. SANS NEEDS A NAP.”

Alphys snorted, the hand not holding the phone slapped over her mouth to muffle the inelegant sound. “W-well I’ll let you go and uh… get back to work I guess. T-talk to you later, Papyrus.”

Sans tugged on Papyrus’s shirt and asked for the phone. “JUST A MOMENT BEFORE YOU HANG UP, SANS HAS SOMETHING TO SAY.” Papyrus held the phone up to the toddler.

Sans brought the phone close and whispered, “bye bye, i love you,” into it before pushing it back towards Papyrus. There was a high pitched shriek and a puff of smoke from the phone, followed by a click. When Papyrus checked the call was ended and the phone seemed unharmed despite the odd smoke it had just emitted.

Papyrus shrugged and pocketed the phone before turning his attention back to Sans. “NOW, ARE YOU READY TO GO TO THE STORE WITH ME FOR REAL THIS TIME ASSUMING THERE ARE NO MORE INTERRUPTIONS?”

“yeah,” Sans replied as he grinned up at Papyrus.

“THEN LET US GO TO THE STORE, NYEH HEH HEH!” Papyrus pointed dramatically before leaving the house and excitedly running down the street.

The bell over the door jingled when Papyrus entered, he knocked the snow from his boots before going inside and carefully shut the door behind him. “Well hello there, Papyrus.” Bonnie smiled at the tall skeleton, “I heard a rumor and was hoping you could clear it up for me.” Her eyes traveled down to the toddler perched on Papyrus’s hip and her ears perked up.

“HELLO BONNIE,” Papyrus cheerfully greeted the shop keep. “I DON’T KNOW WHAT RUMOR YOU MAY HAVE HEARD, BUT I DO KNOW THAT SANS HERE WAS TURNED INTO A TODDLER BY ACCIDENT AND HE IS IN NEED OF SOME SUPPLIES.”

Bonnie whistled, “That was the rumor I was talking about. Goodness, well ain’t that just something else.” She leaned over the counter to get a better look at the toddler. “Well hey there, sweetie, remember me?”

Sans shyly waved at Bonnie, but otherwise kept his face hidden in Papyrus’s side. “HE DOESN’T SEEM TO HAVE HIS MEMORIES OF BEING OLDER,” Papyrus explained quietly. “AND IS VERY SHY.”

“That’s okay, all my little nieces and nephews were shy at that age too, I understand. So how can I help you?”

“I WAS HOPING TO PURCHASE SOME SUPPLIES FOR SANS, WE’RE NOT SURE WHEN DR. ALPHYS CAN FIX ALL THIS SO I’M JUST STOCKING UP FOR NOW. THE GREAT PAPYRUS IS GOING TO BE PREPARED FOR ANYTHING! NYEH HEH HEH!”

“heh heh heh!” Sans echoed from Papyrus’s side with a wide grin on his face.

“SO DO YOU HAVE ANY CLOTHES IN HIS SIZE?” Papyrus continued. “OR FOOD HE MIGHT LIKE? GERSON SENT OVER SOME THINGS BUT IT WAS A STOPGAP MEASURE AT BEST.”

“Hm… can’t say I have much,” Bonnie admitted. “But I’ll tell you what, my sister might have some spare things she can send over, I’ll tell her to stop by later.”

“THANK YOU, BONNIE, THAT WOULD BE VERY HELPFUL. TODDLERS NEED A SURPRISING AMOUNT OF CARE, I HAVE FOUND.”

Bonnie just nodded. Sans tugged at Papyrus’s shirt, “cinny bunny!”

“NOW SANS, YOU JUST ATE! YOU DON’T NEED ANY SWEETS.”

“Awww… let him have it,” Bonnie wheedled. “At that age they stop eating when they’re full, and he’s been such a good little monster, haven't you Sans?” Bonnie smiled wider as she pulled out a cinnamon bunny and held it out for Sans. Before Papyrus could say anything else, Sans had snatched the treat and shoved it in his mouth.

“SANS! SUCH MANNERS! WHAT DO WE SAY TO NICE MONSTERS WHEN THEY GIVE US NICE THINGS?”

Sans looked up at Bonnie and grinned all the wider, crumbs and icing all over his face. “aye wuv yuu.”

“Oh my goodness!” Bonnie put a hand over her chest as if she had just been shot. “I… I love you too, Sans.” The toddler grinned before cramming more of the pastry into his mouth.

“SANS! YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO SAY ‘THANK YOU’ TO BONNIE!”

“That’s alright, I think he’s just fine as is. I’ll just...” Bonnie held up a finger, then quickly gathered more cinnamon bunnies into a paper bag and handed them over to Papyrus. “Just to make sure you have a treat for such a well behaved little monster.” She winked at Sans.

“WELL… THANK YOU, BONNIE, THAT’S VERY SWEET OF YOU.” Papyrus accepted the bag with a grin. The pair waved before exiting the store.

Papyrus was feeling much better, between the boxes of cold cereal Gerson had sent over, the fries from Grillby’s, and the cinnamon bunnies from Bonnie, he was sure Sans wouldn't go hungry at least. As they approached the house, Papyrus was surprised to see Grillby standing on the porch. He had just turned away from the door when Papyrus raised a hand in greeting.

Before either of them could say a thing, Sans shrieked, “girby!” and started squirming in Papyrus’s hold.

“HELLO, MR. GRILLBY, WHAT ARE YOU DOING AT OUR HOUSE? CAN I HELP YOU?” The closer Papyrus got to Grillby, the harder Sans squirmed. Once Papyrus was on the porch it became a struggle to keep the toddler contained. Papyrus quickly tucked the bag of pastries into his inventory to free up his other hand.

“girby!”

“…… actually, I want to help you.” Grillby held up one of the ‘to-go’ paper bags from his restaurant along with a fresh bottle of ketchup.

“girby! girby!”

“OH! THANK YOU!” Papyrus had no intention of feeding Sans any more of Grillby’s greasy food if he could help it, but considering how picky Sans had been so far it wouldn’t hurt to keep his options open. As Papyrus reached to accept the offered food, Sans finally managed to squirm out of his grasp and plopped onto the porch. Before either adult could react, Sans had attached himself to Grillby’s leg.

“girby!” Sans declared happily as he buried his face into the elemental’s knee.

“…………………” Grillby stared down at the toddler, unsure what to do.

“WOWIE! I DIDN’T THINK SANS REMEMBERED ANYTHING FROM BEING OLDER, BUT I THINK HE REMEMBERS WHAT GOOD PLATONIC FRIENDS YOU TWO ARE!”

Grillby just nodded as Papyrus tucked the bag of fries into his inventory. Unsure what else to do, Grillby awkwardly patted Sans’s skull. Sans looked up at him, all smiles.

“THAT’S VERY SWEET OF YOU SANS, BUT I’M SURE MR. GRILLBY HAS A VERY BUSY DAY AHEAD OF HIM AND YOU NEED TO LET GO OF HIM SO HE CAN GO.”

“noooooooooooo...” Sans whined and clung to Grillby’s leg all the harder.

“SANS, NOW IS NOT THE TIME FOR YOUR USUAL STUBBORN TENDENCIES!” He grabbed Sans and bodily dragged him away from Grillby. Sans immediately started crying. Big, globby tears trailed down his chubby cheek bones as Papyrus settled the toddler in his arms. Sans leaned towards Grillby and reached for him as he continued to cry. “I’M SORRY ABOUT THIS, MR. GRILLBY. SANS HAS BEEN VERY EMOTIONAL EVER SINCE THE ACCIDENT.”

“……… that’s quite alright, children cannot help being emotional.” Grillby gently pet Sans’s skull again, causing the toddler to calm down a little. “…… I should get going, I will need to open soon.”

“GOODBYE, MR. GRILLBY.” Sans’s crying picked back up as Grillby left. “REALLY SANS, IT’S NOT AS IF YOU WILL NEVER SEE HIM AGAIN.” Papyrus took Sans inside and set about rocking and soothing him until the toddler calmed down. He had just gotten Sans distracted with a bright orange plush dinosaur Gerson had given him when there was a knock on the door. Papyrus set Sans down and the couch and went to answer it. “HELLO MS. RUBY, I’M VERY GLAD TO SEE YOU!”

“Hello Papyrus,” the innkeeper replied. Little Usa stared up at him from behind her mother’s skirt. “Bonnie told me you need some things for Sans while he’s uh… small? Oh! Is that him?”

Papyrus looked down to see Sans was looking at Usa and Ruby from behind his legs the same way Usa was looking at them from behind her mother. “YES, AS YOU CAN SEE SANS IS NOW EVEN SMALLER THAN BEFORE, AND HE WAS VERY SMALL TO BEGIN WITH.”

Ruby giggled, “Well I do have a few things, I hope they help.” She held up a cardboard box, which Papyrus accepted gratefully.

“THANK YOU, I’M SURE THIS WILL BE A GREAT HELP IN TAKING CARE OF SANS UNTIL DR. ALPHYS CAN FIX EVERYTHING.” He peeked into the box to see it was full of small clothes, a few pairs of little shoes, and a couple toys.

“Of course, it can be so hard being a single parent. Not that I would know personally, but even with a spouse children are a lot of work. Can’t take your eyes off them for a second.”

“THAT IS A LESSON I LEARNED ALL TOO WELL JUST YESTERDAY,” Papyrus sighed as he remembered the antics Sans had gotten up to the night before.

“Well I’ve got to get back to the inn, there’s only so long Bonnie can cover for me. Come along, Usa! Say goodbye to Mister Papyrus and Sans.” Ruby and Usa waved before they turned to leave, walking down the street hand in hand.

Papyrus shut the door behind them, then turned to face Sans. “HOW ABOUT WE SEE IF ANY OF THESE SHOES FIT, THEN WE CAN PLAY IN THE SNOW!” Sans was excited about the idea of playing in the snow and squirmed in place as Papyrus tried the shoes on him. The second pair fit well enough, and he had just gotten the first one securely tied when there was another knock at the door. “JUST A MOMENT!” Papyrus called, he didn’t want Sans running around with just one shoe on, he’d be sure to fall if he tried walking that way, so he quickly tied the other before going to answer the door. This time Sans trailed behind him and hid behind the taller skeleton’s legs as Papyrus opened the door. “OH! HELLO MS. SYLVILA! I WAS NOT EXPECTING YOU TO STOP BY TOO.”

“Hello Papyrus,” a white rabbit monster greeted. “I heard from Dizzy what happened at Grillby’s yesterday, and Bonnie confirmed it wasn’t just some silly rumor. She also said you could use some things for Sans?” She held up an armful of clothes. “Cinnamon just outgrew a few things and I was wondering what to do with them.”

“OH YES, I’M VERY GRATEFUL FOR ANY SUPPLIES FOR SANS, WE’RE NOT SURE HOW LONG HE’S GOING TO BE STUCK AS A TODDLER AND IT WAS A MOST UNEXPECTED TURN OF EVENTS.” Papyrus accepted the offered pile, an awkward affair of somehow getting his arms underneath it as Sylvila moved her own arms out of the way. “AND I AM CERTAINLY GLAD THAT EVERYONE HAS BEEN SO HELPFUL SO FAR!”

“Of course, dear! As you said, it’s so unexpected after all! Nobody could be prepared for their big brother to suddenly get turned into a small child. How have you been holding up?”

“THE GREAT PAPYRUS HAS BEEN DOING AN EXCELLENT JOB! SANS HAS BEEN KEPT FED, ENTERTAINED, AND EVEN GOTTEN MORE EXERCISE IN THE LAST DAY THAN I’VE SEEN HIM GET IN A YEAR!”

Sylvila giggled, “Yes, toddlers certainly are full of energy. Don’t forget to lay him down for a nap later, they often fight it but they do need the rest.”

“I’M SURE SANS WILL BE EXCITED TO TAKE A NAP,” Papyrus said confidently.

“It was nice chatting with you, but I’ve got to get going. There’s no knowing when Babs and Cinnamon will get back from one of their slow walks.”

“THANK YOU AGAIN!” Papyrus called as Sylvila left. He had just deposited the fresh pile of clothes on top of the half filled box Ruby had given him when there was another knock at the door. Sans trailed after Papyrus again as he went to answer the door, “OH, HELLO MR. PAUL!”

A large, brown bear monster in an orange jacket stood in the doorway holding a casserole dish filled with… something. “Hello Papyrus, I heard an interesting rumor and thought you could use a warm meal.”

“WHY THANK YOU, THAT’S VERY KIND OF YOU.”

“Oh!” Paul froze in the middle of handing the dish over to Papyrus to stare down at Sans. “Is that really Sans?” He unceremoniously shoved the dish at Papyrus and crouched down to get a better look at Sans.

“YES, THAT REALLY AND TRULY IS SANS, HE’S VERY SHY.”

“I can see that,” Paul replied as he tried to get a better look at the toddler hiding behind Papyrus’s boots. When he tried to reach for Sans, causing the toddler to flinch and shrink further back, Papyrus decided they had both had enough.

“WELL THANK YOU FOR THE UM… THE DISH. IT WAS VERY THOUGHTFUL OF YOU, I’M SURE. BUT WE HAVE A BUSY DAY AHEAD OF US AND REALLY MUST GET BACK TO IT.”

“Certainly, gotta keep them political gears grinding.” Paul waved a farewell before turning away as Papyrus shut the door.

Papyrus heaved a sigh of relief before going into the kitchen to find someplace to stash the dish. The rest of the morning went on like that, more of the townsfolk stopping by with second-hand clothes and toys to gift Sans, more advice on childcare, a few with food that Papyrus wasn’t all that sure would appeal to Sans, and a few who were just curious and wanted the rumors running around town confirmed. Papyrus found the attention strangely exhausting, why would their well meaning neighbors kindly gifts tire him out so? Perhaps Papyrus was just exhausted from the whole situation.

“pappus,” Sans grabbed one of Papyrus’s fingers and tugged insistently, “hungy.”

“OH GOODNESS, WHAT TIME IS IT?” Papyrus found the clock and realized the whole morning had gotten away from them. “WOWIE, NO WONDER! WELL, WE HAVE A LOT TO CHOOSE FROM, HOW ABOUT WE BOTH GET SOME LUNCH?”

 Papyrus was wiping a bit of spilled food from Sans’s face as the toddler sleepily nodded his head. Papyrus couldn't help but smile at that, of course Sans would need a nap. Honestly, Sans’s napping habits were already very toddler-like, this at least hadn’t changed. Papyrus scooped Sans up and carried him upstairs, then tucked him into the race car bed.

Sans sleepily rubbed an orbit and yawned. “not sleepy,” he insisted.

“I AM NOT SO SURE I BELIEVE THAT,” Papyrus said with repressed laughter as he watched Sans snuggle into the bed and start to drift off. He was sorely tempted to take a nap himself, and he was starting to wonder why he was resisting. After all, he had been told by five different monsters that he needed to take care of himself as well, a short nap would do him good. So Papyrus laid down on the bed next to Sans and drifted off.

Papyrus woke with a jump, something had startled him awake and he was groggily trying to figure out what. He blearily looked around, he had been asleep on top of his covers, which was odd. But even odder was the way the corner of them were thrown back.

Where was Sans?

The realization that he had fallen asleep next to Sans but Sans was now not in the bed woke Papyrus the rest of the way up. He jumped out of bed and ran from the room. There was a loud voice coming from downstairs, he ran down them to find Undyne standing in his living room with a giggling Sans held up above her head. Papyrus sagged against the stair rail in relief.

“UNDYNE, WHEN’D YOU GET HERE?”

“Just now! Hey! What was Sans doing sitting in the living room all alone?”

“THE SLIPPERY LITTLE SNAIL SNUCK OUT OF THE ROOM WHILE I UH… WHILE I WASN’T LOOKING!”

“Yeeeaaaaah,” Undyne eyed him like she wasn’t quite sure she believed the whole story, causing Papyrus to sweat nervously. “Little kids are sneaky like that. Good thing Aunty Undyne is here to keep this little punk out of trouble!” She lifted him in the air again, causing Sans to squeal in delight.

“AUNTY UNDYNE?” Papyrus asked as he stepped the rest of the way into the living.

“Yeah, just until this little squirt isn’t quite so little anymore. Hey! I noticed you’ve been busy.” Undyne shifted Sans to her hip so she had a hand free to motion to the piles of toys and toddler sized clothes sitting around the living room.

“OH YES, EVERYONE HAS BEEN VERY KIND AND GENEROUSLY GIVING SUPPLIES FOR SANS. MOST OF THESE ARE CLOTHES OTHER CHILDREN HAVE RECENTLY OUTGROWN, BUT A LOT OF IT FITS SURPRISINGLY WELL.”

“That really is nice, it’s good to see monsters coming together to help each other out!”

“AND YOU SHOULD SEE THE PANTRY AND REFRIGERATOR! IT SEEMS EVERYONE DECIDED TO HELP WITH SANS’S PICKY EATING HABITS BY GIVING HIM LOTS OF OPTIONS. THOUGH I’M NOT SURE HALF OF THEM ARE THINGS A TODDLER WOULD LIKE TO EAT.”

“Papyrus, you goof! I’m sure some of it’s meant for you too!” Undyne laughed.

“OH, RIGHT. OF COURSE. THE GREAT PAPYRUS KNEW THAT.” He looked away to hide the faint dusting of pink that washed across his cheek bones.

“pappus! pappus!” Sans was reaching for Papyrus, who happily took the toddler from Undyne’s grasp. “up! up!”

“REALLY? AND HERE I THOUGHT YOU WOULD RATHER LAY BACK DOWN,” Papyrus teased as he lifted Sans into the air again.

Undyne smiled, “I was right, you really are a good big brother.”

“OF COURSE I AM, NYEH HEH HEH! BUT THANK YOU FOR THE COMPLIMENT ANYWAY.”

  I don't know why I started adding in all that mystery with their father, but I trust everyone in this fandom to realize who he was and what's going on. But I'll spell it out anyway because I'm a dork like that: it's Gaster. Their father was Gaster. And no, the mystery is not solved in this fic, that was never the point. It's just some angst that kept inserting itself in that wouldn't let me cut it. Gotta have some I guess, gotta balance out the toddlery adorableness somehow!

Also the bit with Sans saying "i love you" instead of "thank you" is based on something that actually happened to me while i was working at an ice cream shop. It was so adorable I wanted to give the kid another ice cream! And of course, I couldn't help putting in hints of my OTP. But since half of my OTP is a toddler right now there's not exactly any good way to put in content for my OTP so it's just hints. Feel free to ignore if they're not your OTP.