#other fun stuff: i just realised for the first time since following you that ur url is midnight hours i'm so fucking dumb

[08melancholie]

Heyy i know u don't usually write about Kieran but i literally cannot stop thinking abt him rip..... if u want to i'd be absolutely overjoyed to see ur take on some sweet stuff with him, like how he'd react to the reader taking him out for a date night and essentially spoiling the shit out of him. I'm talking fancy restaurant, nice bath, warm bed, a massage and lots of praise (maybe even a .. "special reward" if u wanna write that 🤭) . Might even be fun to see how you'd write other characters in this scenario! Especially Arthur and maybe even Micah :3

thank you so much!

-🥐

omgomg yes. i literally love kieran like a little brother ive never had. he is all too precious to me and i miss him dearly </3

I absolutely can do Kieran and Micah.... got a long night ahead of me so I have the time🫦 (doing gn!reader btw)

wasn't gonna include "special reward" related hcs at first butttt.... i couldn't help myself. ill put a little marking for when the nsfw part comes up. was gonna do arthur but id totally write him ooc, sorry :(

Kieran

SFW

Definitely assumes you're trying to tease him at first, telling him the entire plan of pampering the life out of him just to laugh in his face. Wouldn't be the first time someone's teased him this way, so he'd be quite wary about who he trusts and whatnot in camp.

Realises you're being serious after you get agitated with him and tell him you're serious for the millionth time, then gets mildly nervous about going out alone with you. He's very appreciative of the thought, and will thank you more times than generally necessary.

"What? You.. you serious? Oh, naw.. I couldn't possibly—well, it's rude to turn it down..."

First stop; General store. You get him much better quality boots and he thanks you profusely. He feels bad about asking, but simply can't leave without buying Branwen a little treat; an apple or rice cake, nothing too much. Splits it in half when you exit the store and let's you feed your half to his horse, who is definitely a fan of the chin scratches you offer afterwards.

Followed up by a few quick drinks, some hope that a little alcohol in your bodies will help you both loosen up a bit, more-so Kieran who is still skittish.

Beers to start with a shot whiskey both.

Kieran scrunches his face slightly and you call him a wimp. This has him pouting at you; Which is adorable.

He's somewhere between a lightweight and a 'normal' drinker, but four beers seems to already make him a bit giddy and much more relaxed, much to your liking

Next, you're dragging him across the street to get yourselves both a room in the hotel and a bath. Instant flashback to John calling him a stinky O'Driscoll. </3

Minimal protest from Kieran, but he lets you do your thing.

You buy the bath for yourselves first and the room for later. You pay and lead Kieran to the reserved room. Locking the door after him and yourself, you lean on the door and wait for him to get in.

"What—in.. in front of you? You... can't exit for a minute.?"

You can't tell if he's getting red in the face from the alcohol consumption or current situation he's in. Either way, you think it's cute.

NSFW

He doesn't know if it's smarter to quickly strip and jump into the water, or to go slowly; you're staring at him either way.

He opts for a medium pace, very carefully handling his new boots and peeling his shirt off first. He's a bit scrawny and more pinkish than tan, light strawberry skin. He has minimal scarring on his body, nothing too serious.

His pants follow and he starts to nervously fumble with the restrains by now, feeling you still looking at him and eyeing every action he takes. He lets his trousers drop and follows with his drawls. You've probably never seen someone drop their underwear so quickly. He instantly jumps into the bath to keep himself at least partially decent—even after you've seen everything already.

He really enjoys higher temperature water since you can't much afford warm baths like these, so he's being very thankful as he basks in the soapy, hot water in front of you.

You lean off the door and walk to the bath. You fold and put his clothes away before rolling your sleeves up and sitting on the edge of the the tub behind him; like the bath girls do it. You've seen it enough times to know what to do.

You purposefully dip your hands very close to his thighs, sides and arms, throughly enjoying each and every time he squirms or grumbles a little whiny noise from inside his chest.

You rub his entire body, no crevice left untouched by your hands. It might be the hot water he's been soaking inside of, but you can feel just how much warmer his skin is with every touch of your hands caressing his whole frame.

You work your way from his shoulders down his torso, ask him to lift his legs and do those—all up to his stomach where you instead stand up, walk a few steps and lean over the tub.

You make sure to brush just barely out of reach when going over his stomach. He can't help throatily whining again, his head leaning back in frustration. This goes on for a few more minutes until you've physically touched every part of him—all but one very active part.

You got him a mess in the bathtub; sweating, whining, giving you pleading eyes. It's a goddamn sight that has you wanting to sling him over your shoulder and carry to your reserved room instantly.

"You can't just do all'a that... Don't be mean.."

You let him soak in his uncomfortableness for a good few minutes, watching him switch between pleased from the nice bath water to squirmy from lack of caring for his little problem.

"Please, don't leave me like this..."

God, those eyes could get you to do anything. You've never stumbled into a hotel room so quickly, having instantly gotten him decent and practically dragged him out of the baths.

Focused on him the rest of the night, doing anything he (silently) asked for and just putting your own, aching need aside for the time being

Micah bonus <3

SFW

Instantly declined at first, grumbling something about not needing your charity. Instantly agreed when you mentioned drinks at the saloon.

"Guess it wouldn't hurt, would it?"

You get him into town and start off in the gun store, obviously. You let him pick out three upgrades to his revolvers since you know he won't buy any new ones, he only ever really uses his own guns.

He's very satisfied, turning his guns in his hands and inspecting them with the new additions you got him.

You lead him towards the saloon next, for the promised drinks.

He drinks your wallet out with ease, shot after shot and he isn't even near drunk yet, comfortably tipsy at most.

You settle for two beers for yourself, and he teased you about the situation again.

"I'm on my fifth whiskey and you're still only drinking beers? Hah!"

You slap his shoulder and continue to drink, wanting to get to the best part rather quickly.

He downs his last whiskey and his empty glass settles next to your empty bottles, both of you leaving.

"What, a bath? That what you think I'll like?"

He's skeptical but agrees, might be nice to enjoy himself a bit more. And he probably stinks.

You get him inside and watch the smirk on his face when you buy a bath—and a room for later.

"Getting bold on me, are 'ya?"

You lock the two of you inside the bathroom and gesture for him to strip. You're still looking, and it just makes him laugh while slipping his coat off and placing his hat on a nearby table.

He doesn't mind you watching, it just grows the sly smile on his face furthermore.

He gets his naked body into the water and lets out a little "oooh" noise, his white eyelashes fluttering with his eyes as he takes in the bordering perfect temperature, relaxing into the tub behind him.

You watch him get in, blissful look on his usually grumpy face. He watches you with a smirk, asking if you'll be joining—joking about it, obviously.

NSFW

You leave him to enjoy the water for.. maybe three minutes, before you can't help yourself anymore.

His eyes go from lidded and content to wide and surprised, lips parted as he watched your undershirt get unbuttoned, revealing skin little by little.

He's very quick to compose himself, comfortably watching you strip yourself fully bare.

You manage to surprise him a second time by dipping yourself down on his abdomen, and the grin on his face just widens, his chuckle echoing through the bathroom.

"You're reeeally going all out on me tonight, huh?"

His hands quickly find your sides and, assuming consent, he starts touching up your entire form; waist, hips, thighs. He rubs his fingers up to the underside of your chest, your lower and upper back.

"'Ya know, you've taken real good care of me tonight, and I'm feelin' generous; let's return the favour, yeah?"

And that he without a doubt did; officially having no use for the room you bought anymore.

The tables get turned on you and he's quick to initiate some good ole bathtub intimacy.

That's the story of how you got banned from the hotel in Valentine because of a noise complaint. Multiple noise complaints. And a high water bill.

i love cowboys <3

[agi-ppangx]

I have a question…? Could u do a part 2 to the “finding put ur pregnant with minho” where reader and minho plan a fun way to tell the other 7 that they’re pregnant and the kids react in a happy way and how they’re gonna be amazing uncles and stuff?

Thank you in advance 🫶

oh my god my first ask ever !! thank u so much for submitting ‹3 i wrote it in the middle of the night so please excuse all typos and grammar mistakes >< hopefully this is what you wanted, i tried to make it fun and chaotic :D please let me know if you liked it !

part one | part three

feedback and reblogs highly appreciated🫶🏽

you and minho found out you're pregnant a while ago. the past few weeks were really busy for both of you - going to the doctors, learning about pregnancy and reading about babies and overall implementing a new lifestyle. you've told your parents about the baby as soon as you have been confirmed by your doctor that you are pregnant. however, you decided to wait a while before telling anyone else just to make sure your pregnancy is safe.

now you were about to enter the second trimester and you and minho decided to finally tell the boys about the baby, since the bump was starting to show a little bit. but minho being minho didn't want to just say "hey, just so you know - y/n is pregnant and we're about to be parents" - no, he wanted to do it in a bit of a fun way. that being said, you two organised a little game night with the boys, wanting to share the news during charades.

when they arrived you started with some board games to set the mood. all of you were chatting and joking around, no one suspected anything. jisung and hyunjin asked you a few times if you wanted to grab some beer with them and you came out with some lame excuses, like "sorry, i'm not feeling well now" or "nah, i'm good, i have my orange juice" and they were looking at you suspiciously, but said nothing. after what felt like a hundredth question about beer, you announced that it's time to play charades. minho looked at you and smiled a bit, knowing whats about to happen.

chan went first, pretending to be michael jackson. you laughed a little at his impression since he didn't really know how to do the moonwalk but tried nonetheless. then there was hyunjin, trying to do an impression of bob ross, but it resulted in seungmin making fun of him for a good ten minutes. "okay, now it's my turn,'' minho exclaimed and stood in front of you. "i'm gonna make an impression of someone in this room," he added and he proceed to do his best at pretending to be you - he brushed his non-existent long hair out of his face and imitated your giggling. and then he started to show his non-existent pregnancy belly with his hands. you were trying not to smile, but then the boys started talking. "hey, you said it's someone in this room" jisung yelled and pointed a finger at minho. "he's right, no one ate so much food!" jeongin added at which you started grinning. "right? and the only person who could be pregnant is y/n and-" chan started, but quickly stopped in his tracks when he realised. he turned to you and stared at your face with disbelief, the boys following after him. "y/n, is there anything you wanna tell us?" the boys were staring at you, their bewildered faces making you laugh out loud. minho walked to you and sat by your side, giggling with you at how ridiculously funny the boys looked. when you calmed down a bit, you finally decided to answer their question. "i think you've already realised, but yes, there is something we wanna tell you guys" you started and took minho's hand, suddenly feeling a bit anxious. you took a deep breath and continued, "we are going to have a baby and no - we're not getting a fourth cat" you stated, squeezing minho's hand in yours. the boys looked at you two for a while and then the chaos began. they started yelling and jumping all around your living room. "oh my god, y/n thats amazing! congratulations!" chan said loudly, trying to shout over the rest. "we're gonna be uncles! yeah!" felix started screaming, visibly overjoyed by the news. he then proceeded to trap you in a tight hug, making sure not to squeeze you too hard. the rest of the boys followed him and soon after all of them were hugging you. you didn't see much besides their heads, but when you stood on your tiptoes you managed to take a glance at minho - he was standing next to all of you, his face lit up in a huge grin. "okay boys, let me breathe," you chuckled, feeling quite overwhelmed with their love. "oh my god, of course! hey, stop hugging her!" changbin screamed, suddenly protecting you from the boys. jisung was the last one to break the hug, which he did only because chan used force to get him away from you. "c'mon y/n, have a seat, you have to rest," felix exclaimed, leading you to the couch. you giggled again - you found it adorable how they became so protective over you in the span of ten minutes. "do you need anything? like baby clothes or a stroller? wait, we can help you to arrange a nursery!" changbin started to ramble. "and we can buy you all the essentials, like diapers and baby formula," seungmin added, getting his phone to write down a shopping list. "oh, can i teach your kid how to ride a bike? pleeeease!" jisung begged. "okay, slow down everybody," minho finally spoke, trying to control the situation. "y/n is fine, everything is fine, she's only like twelve weeks pregnant, we have plenty of time to plan everything and no - i will be the one to teach them that," he added, hoping that the boys would quiet down. "minho's right, we're fine by now. but im glad our baby will have such amazing uncles,'' you assured the boys, grinning widely. even though the boys' reaction made you laugh for the next few days, you were happy that you had their support. you and minho were nervous about the whole pregnancy thing, but their will to help and be there for both of you made you think that after all universe made a perfect plan for you.

[chazmcfreelyhater]

CHAZ/TOBOR BRO HEADCANONS

omg. so I realised that after I drew Chaz/TOBOR content one time that i haven’t actually shared how important they are to me. erm. so I have made a silly little document of background/headcanons that could have been pages long but I didn’t want to be TOO insane.

also BIG DISCLAIMER the TOBOR headcanons and art at the bottom belong to Chiptoons on Insta/Chipt00ns on Twitter. SHE IS AMAZING and helped me to edit this doc so thank u for ur service chippy. thank you for inventing tobor mysims

They became friends because we were friends and it was like dragging our children along to a function and being like “ok now go play w the other kids” lol. lmao.

We both have OCs x canon with the robots so that's pretty much where it all started from- I probably won’t do a whole timeline at least for now but basically Makoto, Naomi (Louie’s OC) and Vivian (Chippy’s OC) would all spend time together regularly until they started inviting the bohs along

TOBOR was. a bit suspicious of Chaz at first since he had some pretty bad trust issues when it came to humans, and also because that’s usually the normal reaction to meeting Chaz, but he honestly wasn’t super phased by it. Chaz was used to people being kinda cold towards him yet also had a tendency to latch onto them anyway. Even though he spent hours actively trying to annoy him and talk about bike mechanics, which was pretty much just his attempt at being friendly and having fun- the biggest thing for TOBOR was that Chaz would never use the fact that he was a robot against him. Like he would never treat him like any less of a person, to Chaz he literally was just Some cool dude with a green head

Even when they become like Friend friends they still are surprisingly careful around eachothers’ boundaries. Tbh a lot of their relationship is built off things most people wouldn’t expect from them, as in the two scary bitch boys are actually very respectful of eachother and keep secretz and look out for the other n their bffs. It’s not OOC if we make the chars. IDGAF

They actually didn’t think they’d get as close as they did: TOBOR and Chaz essentially see eachother as brothers at this point, since they (mostly through accident) found out they had a surprising amount in common, with the way people kinda assumed stuff about them beforehand and were not the nicest . Chaz considers him one of his best friends bc he is CRINGE and is still constantly out to annoy him but at this point TOBOR just effortlessly shows him up. Chaz also likes to bully him on account of he hearts Vivian and you know what who doesn’t. They both got parental issues too which they also kinda relate to each other with; sometimes there will be stuff between them that they tease eachother for RELENTLESSLY, but if anyone else were to bring it up at all they would be killed within the second. TOBOR tends to stick up for Chaz a lot since he is more naïve and struggles to see when people are actually trying to upset him instead of just being Chaz Haterz for fun. Defending people and having their backs is his love language.

There is also a whole thing in the future with him/Makoto being more closely associated with the Delarosarenas but I don’t want to overshare or b cringe but Kerry literally adores TOBOR and the fact he loves cooking :> he simply IS her new son and she displays interest in hiring him one day. If the lab thing doesn’t work out. Which it is not. Again they r like BROTHERS make no mistake we do not ship them.

Silly little HC list for the fun of it:

Chaz likes to attempt to tackle TOBOR every time he sees him and it always ends in an injury.

TOBOR is secretly very good w Chaz’s younger family members.

TOBOR attempted to teach Travis how to cook for Chaz romantic style. After it all went to shit he informed the Englishman the only way to save it would be to fake his own death.

Chaz’s favourite name for TOBOR is “Flat Head Ass”, closely followed by “Toby”. His bro name for them is “Chobor”. TOBOR is repulsed by every single thing that comes out of his mouth.

TOBOR considers Naomi a little sister. Not super relevant but when Chippy said he probably did I wept. oh how I wept

Toborviv bridal party at Chavis wedding. I may be cringe but I am free.

TOBOR succumbs to the fact he is in love with Vivian. Instead of confessing, he panics and asks Chaz, who has NO electronic experience, to program it out of him. They both damn near die, bro style

TOBOR LETS HIM INFODUMP he is happy that Chaz trusts him ahehe

WTF!!! Da gallery:

[wawawawawawawawawawawawawa]

the anon who doesnt have aspd and taught myself empathy again here! i've never talked to a psych (self diagnosed autism) and as a teen i was p sure i had aspd (i Knew shit was strange w me and really wanted an explanation and once i figured out my mix of trauma and autism things made sense) coz lack of remorse and shit but i never actually really matched the rest of it -- i dont have substance abuse issues and never have, im p easily entertained, i've had the same three friends basically my entire life. i do though describe myself as the worlds most boring hedonist coz like yeah i sometimes have a hard time controlling my impulses and im motivated by fun but for me thats usually p simple -- easily entertained. read a book, video games, jump around to music. i AM frequently bored though?? like its my most frequent emotion and ive spent a Long time learning to cultivate my joy and really feel it properly. but im also the most easily excitable person i know. i dunno, i have v large emotions that appear then disappear quite quickly. a favourire hobby of mine since i was a kid has been to start arguments between the ppl i care abt and see how large i could make them in a single session then solve the argument w/o the ppl realising i'd manufactured and egged on the argument. which typing that out now seems uh. an interesting hobby. but late last year i told my younger brother and he laughed coz its a v me thing to do and was like "yo thats fucked. pls stop doing it to me" so since then ive mainly tried to just like playfully tease ppl in a normal way coz cognitively i understand its a fucked thing to do and im trynna be like, a decent person who doesnt go outta my way to play w ppl for funsies. which yeah that uh... maybe i Should look into aspd more again, i did a fairly shallow look into it as a teen and relating to azula as much as i did as a kid (and izaya as an older teen/young adult) was deff a sign of smth

i've followed you on this blog for a while (i think you'd only had it for a couple weeks when i first followed u?) so yeah i did know the story abt u and ur fiance! v cute

i feel like maybe we need a different identifier than "the anon who doesnt have aspd" because that might not be, uh. accurate! i have o clue why a lot of people with aspd seem to congregate around my account but i guess this is an aspd helpline now??????? whuh????

like im not complaining its just. how did i get here

also i think ive deadass used the "worlds most boring hedonist" descriptor for myself before and i deal w chronic boredom the same way you do- i have a LOT of hobbies and i plan elaborate projects and that entertains me but only temporarily

and thats the thing about aspd! it- like every other disorder- is a spectrum. you might not have substance abuse issues, and i do. you did.... your interesting hobby, and i find it morally fucked!* i have no idea your relationship with criminality, and i got fired for stealing

*i have done something similar but i have a moral policy of like, only fucking with people who Deserve It. who deserves what varies case by case and what exactly i do... i need to explain weird spiritual stuff to go in depth andyeah im not really itchin to be called crazy on tumblr dot cum

aspd in general is very misunderstood and no literature really focuses on what its like to have the disorder, only the perceived damage being around someone with the disorder will bring- which is why i initially self diagnosed thru tumblr posts from ppl talking about their symptoms in a serious educative way

sometimes i think like, maybe i don't have aspd, maybe i'm just autistic and i'm spreading misinformation- but i never really felt "at home" with other autistic people. its like- yeah i click better with other autistic people, but i'm still masking, i'm still faking, and even in this situation i can drop the mask partially but not fully. growing up with a personality disorder and trauma in communities largely filled with autistic people with trauma, very quickly teaches you that there's something different about you. it's an isolating, traumatizing feeling- my experience with this was mainly symptoms of npd, but like.... knowing you have a problem, wanting it fixed, and knowing nobody around you knows how deep the problem runs, and might even find its existence laughable or dangerous... it's isolating! and its shitty!!

generally i tend to Know if things i'm doing are bad or not, i just tend to not care in the moment, because it's better than being bored! entertainment wins out over everything. it's actually kind of terrible; i'll do stuff just to see a reaction out of people- it's like izaya, honestly, what happens when people are pushed to their breaking points?

thats kind of how i got so much into angst and psychological horror. not only did i want to break the characters, i wanted to break my audience. i'd tell my friends detailed stories about torture partly because i was interested in my story, mostly because i wanted to see their horrified reactions. i wanted to see how far was "too far," and i keep that stuff in my current narratives- i keep the pov extremely tight and do silly little tricks with narrative and formatting to make the audience feel like they're Really There

so yeah look into aspd. do it boy listen to me im the ps5 im speaking to you inside your brain. do it boy do it

[londonfoginacup]

if ur goal was make louis ugly with that rapunzel drawing then you made it, congrats

Hi, love! Let’s talk about this :)

Now, since you sent this message pretty soon after that piece was reblogged by a handful of other accounts, I’m going to say you probably don’t follow me. Good for you! That means you’re likely not seeking out and following content you don’t like! That’s one of the first rules of keeping a positive internet space.

That being said, the fact that you felt the need to seek me out and send this message shows that you’re still dealing with the desire to engage with content that is impacting you negatively. Now I know it’s not easy, but in the long run you’ll find yourself in a healthier mindset if you don’t let yourself send the anon hate. Stuff like that really builds up in your system, like a poison that you don’t notice until it’s six feet of sludge in your heart. It’s much harder to deal with six feet of sludge than to deal with the few teaspoons. Remember that you can block me, or blacklist my username!

Because I assure you, I will continue to make art that you will think makes Louis look “ugly”. The inktober challenge is fun because it’s a challenge. Yesterday I didn’t have time to create anything until approximately 10 at night, which was the first time all day I had gotten to sit down and just turn my brain off. I’m an adult and my days are busy! So sometimes my art is done fast! And ink is hard because I’m used to a digital medium where I can move the lines around after I’ve drawn them. It is, like I said, a challenge. And challenges create ugly art.

Don’t worry, though. Last month I drew the ugliest picture of Harry I’ve ever seen. I finished it and zoomed out and realised he looked like my ex boyfriend combined with a beaver. Literally I cannot look at that picture anymore. But I still posted it! Because it’s ugly, but it’s an ugly I made :)

You should try it! Make art indiscriminately! Put your heart into it! Then message it to me, so I can reblog it and we can both find joy in the creation of fanwork! It’s good for the soul. And don’t worry, if anyone sends you anonymous hate, you don’t have to care. Because anyone who isn’t brave enough to put their name on their hate is probably hurting without knowing an outlet for their grief or anger.

It’s okay, anon! We’ve all been there.

[jostepherjoestar]

Drawing inspiration to this request —> [Hi dear 🖤 La Squadra's reaction to their fem reader's rough and low voice. She is a La Squadra member] May I please request what would La Squadra's reaction be to a member that never speaks who finally speaks for the first time and she has the sweetest and cutest voice ever despite looking very intimidating and cold? Turns out, she's a total shy sweetheart that just looks cold and intimidating since she's part of la squadra

Quiet and intimidating La Squadra member who actually has the cutest voice (fem reader)

Before we start, I’ve reached 100 followers!!! Thank you all so much, I wanna squish all of ur lovely faces!!! Now onto the fun stuff! Made these a bit longer in celebration :))) they’re more like little scenarios

Risotto

Risotto liked the fact that you were more quiet than the rest of his team. It’s not that he hates the noise, it’s just a nice change to have someone who rarely even speaks... now that he thinks of it you’ve actually never spoken around them. He liked that the two of you had the same aura surrounding you, intimidating and perhaps a bit cold.

He’d grown curious to what your voice may sound like, his ears like that of an alert cat whenever he heard an unfamiliar voice around him. Always disappointed to see that it wasn’t you.

What he didn’t know is that you were just horribly shy and never thought you had anything useful to add to the wild conversations. (your own thoughts were wrong ofc)

When you finally spoke for the first time it was to ask about details of a mission, Risotto and you were going on a mission together, alone, for the first time and he hadn’t provided that much details. Which unbeknownst to you was his plan all along. He can be a sly bastard.

You quietly asked him what the plan was after you got his attention when stepping into his office. He couldn’t believe his own ears when he heard the sweetest little voice coming from you. Of course he asked you to repeat yourself and when you did, louder than before, he had to try his hardest to cover up the massive smile growing on his lips.

On the mission itself, you talked more and more to him, warming up to conversation. Risotto felt his heart skip a beat every time you did. He never knew how much he’d appreciate such a cute one like you. 

Formaggio

Formaggio had been trying his hardest to make you talk or even produce any sound at all. Telling joke after joke, calling your name out in the middle of a different conversation so you’d perhaps even just say “Yes, what?”. He’d even tried scaring you, using his stand to shrink himself and hiding behind the coffee machine.

Of course his prank didn’t work, you almost threw him in the trash with an unamused look. But whenever Formaggio truly did his best you walked away from him with a cold look. When you were in a different room you’d silently laugh or let out a big sigh, if only he knew how shy you were and that you’d love to talk to him, but it was yourself stopping you from it.

He liked you, he knew that, you knew that. But when it came to your opinion on him, he actually wasn’t so sure and it gnawed at him. He’d grown a bit insecure, to calm his own thoughts he decided he’d ask you tonight.

He came into your room with a quiet knock while he opened the door, seeing you at your little desk reading a book. Greeting you, he sounded a bit off which worried you, you doing your best to stay stoic. “Do you like me? You know, as a person? Cause I get the feeling you don’t.” the question visibly surprised you. You put down the book and walked over to him, he wasn’t sure what you were planning by the sweat starting to form on his forehead. “Of course I like you Formaggio.” you said in earnest, holding the side of his arm.

That’s it, the man is now a mere puddle on the floor. Your soft, sweet voice mixed with the utter shock has made him melt. He excused himself with a smile and ran out of your room yelling in the hallway that you liked him. He wanted all of Italy to know.

Illuso

Illuso had been intrigued by your cold and quiet nature. Every chance he got he studied your behaviour, trying to figure you out. He didn’t really find out much, only being able to study your habits. In his mirror world he tried his best to observe you, trying to even include a few new extra mirrors in your room.

But after finding weird new mirrors you’d grown suspicious of him and threw them all out. Your room would be a mirror free zone to Illuso’s chagrin. You didn’t dislike him, it was just that his sneaking and investigating bothered you. At least the others made an attempt to talk to you.

He grew tired of waiting, frustrated even that you never talked and he was having a hard time figuring you out. He was good assassin, confident in his own skills. He had to think outside of the box to get you to talk or just catch you doing it.

After much thought he decided on a plan. No plan. He accepted that everything he would concoct would just push you away, a top notch assassin like you knew when they were being played with.

When you woke up today, you felt light and the soft sunshine made you feel positively energised. Everything around you was quiet, no conversations downstairs, no clattering in the kitchen, no showers running. You hummed along to a song while brushing your hair in the bathroom, for a moment feeling completely at ease.

The door was open, not having bothered to close it since no one seemed to be home. But Illuso was. He stood in the doorway, a smile on his face, it finally worked. The soft melodic hums putting him on fluffy pink clouds, wanting the cute voice to soothe him to sleep tonight. Content with what he’d heard, he silently walked away. You knew he was there and honestly relieved that he didn’t approached you, you’d have turned bright red  from embarrassment if he did.

Prosciutto

Prosciutto sighed after realising he’d have another Risotto to look out for. Don’t get him wrong he had great respect and love towards his capo and good friend, but he worried about him. Perhaps too much. So he did what he did to Risotto before. Give you space.

He know’s that pushing you or forcing you to talk would only have the opposite effect. The silent communication you had of nods was enough for now.

The way you were around him made him softer, to his own surprise and chagrin. Of course he cared for his teammates and capo, but don’t let them know all the time and so openly. They’ll get cocky.

It comforted you knowing the space he was giving you, thankful that he hadn’t pushed you. In the beginning you were a little intimidated by him, his stern looks really chilled you to the bone. But his deep voice and (weirdly aggressive) pep talks showed you his more approachable side.

You had tried multiple times to talk to him, you’d built up your courage and were so close to opening your mouth to talk when someone always came and interrupted. Sometimes you even felt a little relieved when they did.

On a quiet afternoon Prosciutto invited you to the empty sitting room, small espresso cups in hand. You felt a little nervous since it was just the two of you, hand shaking a little as you grabbed your cup. The shaking causing you to spill coffee on your knee, the hot liquid burning a red spot on the exposed skin of your leg. You sighed out a ‘Merda!’ as you patted you leg dry.

A sly smile growing on Prosciutto’s face, finally your little facade had cracked a little. You could hear him chuckle in front of you. “Who knew such a sweet voice could produce such nasty words.”

Pesci

This man was quite intimidated by you and your cold exterior. It made you laugh in private since you were shy and sweet just like Pesci. Because you could see your reflection in him, you hung out around him a lot. Just silently watching tv together, sitting next to him at meetings, cooly handing him your leftovers at dinner when he still had room left for more.

It made Pesci blush, your sweet gestures not matching the cold expressions. But on the inside you felt so comfortable and perhaps a bit jealous that Pesci wasn’t as shy as you and expressed himself so honestly.

But the cold expression and the limited eye contact during you friendly offerings were not because you didn’t like him, it was because if your eyes met you’d also be blushing at the sweet man in front of you.

Still, after all your silent offerings he was not assured to approach you by himself. He was cautious and also didn’t want to push you out of your comfort if you didn’t feel like talking. He’d create awkward silences that didn’t even need to be uncomfortable, he just couldn’t help himself.

Whenever there was time, between the jobs that offered enough physical training, you’d all train together. On one of these days, everyone was working hard, sparring, lifting and running to built up stamina. You were done with your exercises, muscles tired, body sweaty but feeling the rush of the after workout bliss. Pesci was on his last set of arm lifts when you walked over.

His arms were shaking and it looked like he was on his last straw. The bar resting on his chest as he took deep breaths. You stood behind him, signalling you’d spot him for safety. His strong arms shaking under the weights, struggling to do the last lift. “Come on Pesci, I know you can do it.” Your sweet encouragement was loud enough for him to hear but not so loud that the others noticed.

With one last grunt he pushed up the weights, an excited sound ringing out loudly as he puts the weights back on the rests. His face seemed red from the strain but the goofy smile betrayed him, it was you that did that to him.

Melone

Oh little melon man figured you out so fast. He was of course polite and friendly to you, always the gentleman (you’d be surprised at how nice and considerate he could be) but behind all this he was waiting patiently.

He knew as soon as he noticed your cold facade and silent nature that you were hiding a sweetness behind it. But he was excruciatingly patient, to a degree that he didn’t even care anymore about hearing your voice or seeing you smile for once. Just the excitement of waiting for you to crack is what invigorated him.  

His behaviour worried you, you’d known from seeing him interact with the others what he was like and it was blatantly obvious that he treated you different. He left you alone, didn’t push of prod, didn’t joke around to extract a reaction.

You were already shy but the way he was acting made you even more nervous. Maybe perhaps a little angry since you knew the game he was playing and you felt yourself losing. The way he acted actually making you want to talk to him, wanting him to give you the attention he gave to others so teasingly.

You decided you were going to play along, while also working against him. At least trying to reverse the effect of his game. You’d dress a little more provocatively, bending and pushing your best assets forwards whenever he was near, knowing that was an easy way to get his attention.

You weren’t even sure you wanted him in that way, pining over your body. But you had to play dirty if that’s the way he did things. But nothing worked, every attempt failed. He didn’t budge, his sly smiles only lasting longer, he knew he was winning.

Melone was sitting comfortably on his legs on the couch, he looked lost in thought when you approached. You made sure no one was around. Defeated and not even sure why you were even going to reward him. “You win, Melone.” You plopped down next to him with a deep sigh. Your sweet voice like heavenly harps at the gates of heaven to Melone’s ears. “Well played, kitten. You almost got me, maybe if you kept going you’d have actually won.” he purred while winking. Oh you could kill him right now...maybe you will. Just a little.

Ghiaccio

Ghiaccio didn’t mind your quietness at all. But he made you nervous and, afraid to set him off if you did something wrong or looked at him the wrong way. He’d notice your shoulders tense up every time he yelled, he wasn’t yelling at you though, probably at Melone.

It got him a little fired up that he made you tense, perhaps more at himself since never actually wants to be mad, it just happens. He’s been avoiding you for a while now.

You’d noticed him acting cold to you and avoiding even the slightest contact between each other. It made you wonder if it was your fault. If only there was a way to help this problem out of the way. Oh wait there is, it’s called communication. But you just couldn’t do it, not yet.

Both too stubborn or scared of talking to each other, it continued. Your teammates also noticing the air in the room get colder once Ghiaccio and you entered. Risotto and Prosciutto weren’t really sure what to do, no idea what the actual problem was, and you weren’t talking. Ghiaccio wasn’t either.

The idea sprung to Prosciutto to get you in the same room together and not let you out until you’d talked about it. And as dumb as it sounds, his plan proceeded, Ghiaccio was already in Risotto’s office, the capo also part of the plan. Luring you in was easy enough, since you didn’t know that Ghiaccio was in there already.

By god they ‘Parent Trapped’ you. You sat in the chair next to Ghiaccio who had slowly begun calming down. His tirade of insults at the closed door had already come and gone. It felt like an hour had passed, it actually did, before he began talking. “Why do you get so tense around me? I know I get angry but it’s rightfully so. There’s just so many stupid people. I’d never actually hurt you or the others. Not that much...” he sighed, finally saying what’s been on his mind.

“You’ve talked to everyone but me. Am I that horrible?” he sounded so sad when he talked, almost a whisper. You couldn’t handle your own silence anymore. “You’re not horrible, I- I just don’t know how to-.” you couldn’t string the right words together but Ghiaccio understood. Your sweet voice softening the emotions. The two of you actually hugged it out, but you’d never let Risotto or Prosciutto get the satisfaction of knowing that.

[eutaerpe]

the escapades (m)

pairing — jimin x reader

genre/warnings—  smut (oral, fingering, orgasm denial) & college!au, fratboy!jimin, brief e2l, brief ewb, acr universe

summary —  the one where there’s a lot of unresolved sexual tension, until there isn’t.

notes — 8.3k words of the happiness before the storm i couldn’t write. i realised halfway through this there’s a slight plotwise change in comparison to what i wrote in acr so. yeah. sorry. kudos to you if you find it lol

The first time it happens, you’re pretending to be someone you’re not.

You’re sitting near the end of the table, crossing your legs and playing with the hem of your dress, your lips twisted into a frown. The real reason lying behind the simple decision of having a single, almost infinite table of guests doesn’t, in the slightest, cross your mind; why your idiotic brother would see this as a delightful idea really is above you, but you suppose the valuable genes in the family runs all in your DNA.

You’re playing with the table decorations while waiting for the guests to come, and it’s so fucking boring you regret telling Seulgi no, babe, what the fuck - you even shook your head and decided to sound extra mad at the idea - I won’t sneak in weed.

Too bad for you, she had answered, a cute pout on her lips, I’ll give you an hour before you’re bored out of your mind.

The truth hangs above your head, with a sheepish grin: you just needed ten minutes to be absolutely, drastically bored.

In hindsight, sneaking in weed wouldn’t have been the worst idea: your mother is talking to the in laws, gesticulating excitedly at the idea of kids right after marriage. What the fuck, you text Seulgi, at home trying to get out of bed, my brother has been married for an hour and there’s already baby talk going on at the table.

 Seulgi

[12.49]

With the baby talk comes the dick talk

 You

[12.49]

Oh no the dick talk

 Seulgi

[12.50]

man how can you survive your relatives talking about nonexistent boyfriends without my weed, damn???

 You

[12.50]

option a: I’ll tell them I’m dating you

 Seulgi

[12.50]

we kissed ONE time

 You

[12.50]

option b: I’ll tell them I’m in a relationship with Jeon jungkook

 Seulgi

[12.50]

bitch we both know you’re not in a relationship with the hottest guy on campus. he has dimples and long hair and piercings. my sources can even confirm he has a big dick. what do U Have

 You

[12.51]

i was talking about my vibrator but go off lmao

anyway I’ve had that D ;)

 Seulgi

[12.51]

you’re officially cancelled

when did this happen? I can’t believe you’re telling me over text!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 You

[12.51]

last semester!!!!! why do you think I’ve named my vib after him!!!!!!

 Seulgi

[12.52]

because you’re lusting after him like the rest of us mortals!!!!!!!!!!

 You

[12.52]

I’ve upgraded since then. I’ve leveled up. I’ve seen things People Can’t Even Imagine

 Seulgi

[12.52]

just say he got u off and go

 You

[12.52]

;p

anyway option c: I scare them away by saying controversial things. Id est: I don’t believe in love. I am choosing my partner solely judging their abilities to finger me under a table when people are around. I am secretly lusting after my brother’s wife. I am trying to get impregnated like in The Sims 2 aka I am waiting for that alien dick.

 Seulgi

[12.52]

hate to break it to you babe but that’s literally who you are

 You

[12.52]

i

I literally compliment joohyun’s boobs once and this is the treatment I get

 Seulgi

[12.52]

are we not gonna talk about your alien dick kink

 You

[12.52]

no kink shaming in this house lady

option d: I listen to their complaints and run

 Seulgi

[12.53]

option dick

man sorry I meant option d

 You

[12.53]

you didn’t

 Seulgi

[12.54]

ur right I didn’t

 Option e, also known as I’ll entertain the other guests so I don’t have to talk to you, presents itself in the form of one very hot, very ripped young man sporting the most expensive shirt in the room. You’re only human when you admit to yourself, mental sigh, that he ticked all the let’s get y/n horny requirements in less than fifteen seconds.

You can’t believe Joohyun has kept him hidden for so long from you. Such betrayal ends when your brother, Kim fucking Seokjin, hugs him tight and brushes with utter affection the nape of his neck, gracing him with a warm smile and a heartfelt laugh.

You can’t believe Seokjin has kept him hidden for so long from you.

Well. Scratch that. You can.

Suddenly, the ticked requirements disappear and a giant neon sentence with a very cheap background music impose themselves in your head. WHAT A TURN OFF! they read, the neon red words mocking you; you steal a glance at your brother’s acquaintance one more time - one last time - before slipping your phone in your hands and dedicating yourself one more time at your Instagram feed, scrolling through the most recent pics.

(You stumble upon an extremely rare Jungkook selfie, and you hate to admit you spend the following thirty seconds admiring him before tapping twice on the quality content you’ve signed up for when you joined the social)

You suppose that, even though your brother’s friends with fuckboy tendencies are signed off your let’s get to know each other better ;) list, it doesn’t mean the same goes for them.

So, when the dark-haired young man with a jawline sharper than Seulgi’s retorts after her third beer sits next to you, you reckon you shouldn’t be that surprised.

He acts all casual, you notice while discreetly looking at him; he’s busy taking off his jacket and flexing his muscles, all of this while pretending not to notice you, and you find it immensely cute.

Ah, fuckboys.

“Fuck,” he rasps, lips twisted in a crooked smile, “I didn’t think it would be this hot today.”

“Yeah, sorry, the heat is on me.”

He chuckles in disbelief at your words, eyes turning into crescents.

“Right, there’s always the girl stealing the bride’s spotlight at weddings.”

“Oh! That’s me,” you nod enthusiastically, “That’s one hundred percent me.”

“Groom or bride?” He asks, pointing at the couple with his chin.

“What do you think?”

He looks at you funny, pressing his back on the seat, pondering in silence. Cute.

“Bride. One of Bae’s sorority sisters, maybe? You seem too young to be her age, though.”

“Damn,” you exhale, crossing your arms under your chest, “I can’t believe you got it all wrong. The expectations were low, but I’m still disappointed.”

He ducks his head, still smiling. “Then it’s the groom. How do you know Seokjin?”

Your eyes twinkle with excitement at your next words, but honestly, who can blame you? You’re having fun with this lost, cute chick.

“What’s your take, officer?”

He erupts into a laugh, and you drink in his handsome features; fuck you, Seokjin, for being friends with fuckboys only.

“Alright,” he punches the bridge of his nose, scanning the room, which is slowly filling with other guests. “I’m his friend, and I know all of his friends, which can only mean one thing: option a, you’re one of his ex-girlfriends; option b, you’re one of his secret hook-ups; option c, you’re an old friend from high school.”

“Oooh,” you beam, unrealistically intrigued, “You really suck at guessing, don’t you?”

He laughs, passing a hand through his dark locks, messing his perfectly styled hair. “Ok, fair. Which one was the closest, then?”

“Option d, of course.” You nod, relaxing your features into a sheepish grin, “I’m his much more beautiful and smarter sister.”

You exam his face, now twisting into some sort of what the fuck, such betrayal look, and you take in, for the last time – really the last, this time – his attractive, sculptured face, his full lips, the smoothness of his skin. It’s awful and unfair knowing you two won’t cross paths ever again in your lives, but at least you had some fun messing with him before things could worsen.

“I’ll be sitting in the middle of the table, with my family, if you want to avoid me.”

You wink at him for good measure, and you swear to god he blushes.

 Half a wine bottle and two flutes of prosecco down, you realise you underestimated your resident fuckboy.

It happens when you’re grabbing your napkin and channelling your dreamy, happy looks towards the newlyweds, dancing in the middle of the room, their eyes gravitating only towards the love of their lives.

You sigh, pouting for the smallest of fractions, when you feel someone sitting at your side.

“You know,” Fuckboy begins, and you picture him licking his lips as he pauses, “Now I get why he never told us anything more than: I’m not an only child.”

“I know,” you exhale, turning to face him, “Seokwon is the real catch of our family. We’re really protective of him.”

“He’s married. With kids.”

“I was there when the twins opened their eyes, thank you.”

“We thought you were either a small kid or a forty years old woman.”

“Wait,” you tilt your head, “How did you know about us then? And who’s we?”

“We dug into his stuff and he caved in, admitting he had a brother and a sister.” Fuckboy looks at you, eyes dark but reflecting the dim lights of the function room, “Us. The frat guys.”

“Right, the fuckboys.”

He looks taken aback by your statement, bewildered, and you take advantage of his reaction to stand up and head away from him. It’s his words that stop you from doing so, though.

“You don’t know us—”

“—except I do know your pledges and your brothers.”

“But you don’t know me.”

“Maybe,” you shrug, “I prefer to steer away from my brother’s friends, though.”

“Right,” he says, tightening his lips in a hard line, almost hurt, “So, who am I to interfere with your judgmental thinking?” He clicks his tongue, then, a resolute exhale slipping past his lips, smothered by his own tingling despair.

The words hurt.

You don’t know what exactly pinched your senses hard, if the tone or the wallowing sadness swimming in his expression, but, as he stands up and leaves, you’re left facing the cold, hard truth.

The words hurt, you hurt, and you feel guilty.

You say nothing, glancing in the direction of the first alcoholic beverage around, and you fill yourself a glass.

Had it been someone else – had it been another sentence, another less sickening scenario, you would’ve felt proud, righteous. You’re, instead, on the other side of the feelings spectrum, all filled with crippling guilt and a nauseous, pervasive feeling you can’t quite name and pin down.

The guests are dancing around you, moving hand in hand to the rhythm of the pop love song now playing; the ballroom is packed when you let your impulsive side make a choice, eyes following the guy’s composed figure. You can drastically feel the sweat, and the heat the people are radiating, when you stand up and move towards him, the only smiling boy passing his glass from a hand to the other.

You’re close enough to tap his wrist and brush your fingers, which you do; it elicits a gasp from him, all soft, not scathing around the edges yet able to bite you, anyway. It’s the guilt, you remind yourself, looking for a sign of some sort of inclination to accept your apologies between the crease of his brows and tight jaw, and everywhere in between.

It’s sickening—this boy didn’t exist four fucking hours ago. It didn’t even cross your wildest dreams, someone like him. His shape – his silhouette – has left a print in your mind, and no matter how hard you try focusing on something else, someone else, your mind keeps going back to the shape itself.

But you’re a coward, so, while he lets you intertwine your fingers, you admit, voice loud: “I wanna dance.”

He handles you properly, kindly, before pushing you in the crowd and brushing your hips with his hands, all rings and jewellery adorning them.

He blinks twice, biting the insides of his mouth, but he manages,

“Who says I wanna dance?”

Which is a bit stupid, or hypocritic if you might, because he’s swaying you to the rhythm of a ballad the pop love song turned into. You break into the smallest of smiles.

“I want to apologize.”

He scoffs. “I don’t know you,” he says, funnily enough, “But that seems almost unlikely, coming from you.”

“Yeah, you got me there, officer. I was, uhm,” you stare blatantly at his neck, and you suppress the desire to stroke your fingers’ pads on his soft skin, “I was out of line. I’m sorry. You were right, I don’t know you. I do know your frat brothers, my own brother, but that doesn’t mean I know you.”

He hums, moving for a small fraction of instants his thumbs on your hips and it’s enough for your breath to catch into your own throat. He nods, which could mean anything, from I accept your apology to go fuck yourself, this is bullshit. You prefer the former option, if you’re being honest, which is the answer you settle for in your head, hazed and absolutely hazed and madly hazed because of his small physical contact.

To put this into the simplest terms, Seulgi’s words, you don’t like this.

“I like dancing,” his eyes tower you and gaze at the other people dancing; you wonder if he’s thinking about them, who they are to you, what role they played in Seokjin’s life, if they’ll show up to your wedding, too. These thoughts popped into your mind unannounced, before, at the table, before the not-really-fuckboy sat next to you and made you feel guilty. Such absurdity; yet here you are, in his arms. Oh god, what would Seulgi think of you if she saw you?

“Good to know, I’m awful at shoulder-hips coordination.”

“Shoulder-hips coordination?” he inquiries, lips parted.

“Uh, body rolls?”

“Oh,” he chuckles, “I see, you mean classy grinding.”

“I don’t do classy grinding, sorry,” you retort, head tilted to a side.

His smile his amused. “Too bad, shoulder-hips coordination is a nice trait to exhibit sometimes.”

“I prefer hips coordination. Well, hips rotation.”

“Hips rotation?”

“Riding? Is the term somehow unfamiliar to you?”

He flushes, biting back a grin and fixing his gaze somewhere in the crowd. How cute.

“Not at all, it’s nice to meet a hips rotation enthusiast here, though.”

“Statistics say at least a member in each family is a riding enthusiast, did you know?”

“Shit, talk dirty to me,” he licks his lips, pointing at Jin with his chin, “Didn’t peg him for a rider, though. Not at all.”

“I’m starting to think you’re not a STEM major, are you? You’re lacking basic intuition, my friend.”

“Is this your attempt of discovering my major?” – he eyes you, a flick of amusement burning in his orbs – “You’re not very smooth, you know?”

“I have my moments.”

He snorts, placing both hands on the small of your back. You’re at height level with the base of his neck, and it’s fun how your mind betrays you in such moments, providing mental images of your nose brushing against his skin, and you nuzzling in the crook of his neck. Such taunting, invasive pictures. Fuck off, you reprimand your own mind, fuck off.

“I’m Jimin.”

“Jimin,” you taste the name on your tongue, hitting the back of your front teeth. “Jin never talked about you. I’m Y/N.”

“Jin never talked about you either.”

“Of course he never did, I’m prettier than he is.”

His little dimples make an appearance. “You know, you could really steal the bride’s spotlight.”

“That was my ultimate goal all along, even though I prefer the dark side.”

“I,” he licks his lips, and you don’t know why you’re following the gesture, “I meant to say you’re beautiful.”

“Oh my god,” you whisper, eyebrows raising, “Are you a charmer?”

“I mean,” he begins, sheepish smile on display, “I never kiss and tell.”

“Touching.” He smirks. “How sweet of you.”

“You know what else is sweet?”

“Please,” you beg, meeting his eyes, “Don’t say my pussy.”

“Please,” he repeats, same mocking tone, “The possibilities are endless. Your mouth,” he scoots closer, words whispered on the shell of your ear, “Your mouth around my dick,” he almost nibbles your ear, “Your mouth screaming my name.”

“My pussy,” you add, trying not to lose your mind.

“I would never call sweet something I’ve not tasted.”

He raises a brow.

“Are you offering? You’re not very smooth, you know?”

He ignores the last question, tightening his grip. “In the middle of your brother’s wedding? Seokjin’s wedding? I’m not a dick, even though you sitting on my face would be a sight to see.”

“Right?” your voice doesn’t falter for a second, “That’s what I always say”

“Nice to see how we’ve got much in common. But I was thinking of something else, actually—” His face is once again inches away from yours, ear to mouth, hot breath fanning over you bare neck. “I wanna finger you.”

Oh.

“Under the table. Right behind you. Wanna make you whimper.”

It’s almost like being tongue-tied, fumbling for words, body flushing, but you gather somewhere the strength to form an actual sentence, which makes him smirk devilishly.

“I can be very quiet.”

He pokes his tongue into his cheek. “Bet you can’t keep your pretty mouth shut.”

“When I win,” you say, lying your words on an unrealistically high vote of confidence, even for yourself, “What do I get?”

He licks his lips, slow, savouring the moment. “You get to ride my face.”

“Not your dick?”

“I’m not a fuckboy, baby.”

A comeback of some kind is already on your tongue, but – there’s a kiss somewhere in the following seconds, all wet and tingling and perhaps filled with too many lip bites, but he can’t really blame you when you’ve been brushing your thighs together for the past minute, heat pooling down your belly. It’s enough for you to silently pledge for more, and for him to tease, because he takes a step back, smirk in place and lips reddened, and guides you towards his seat at the end of the table with a hand on the small of your back.

Downhill begins as soon as you sit down, legs barely parted, a minimum space not fitting for his plans, apparently, because the crease between Jimin’s eyebrows grows when he nudges them apart with his hand, the cold metal of his rings cooling down your flushed state. You want to gasp at the sudden intrusion, but the sound is swallowed entirely by his hot mouth on yours, distracting once again, incredibly soft and alluring. This kiss is slow, this time, like he’s taking his time tasting you and learning about the hums he draws out of you, the shyness of your previously biting tongue, and how fast you get lost in the kiss itself. You press a chaste kiss on his mouth, before creaking a space between you.

“I’m starting to think you’re all bark and no bite”

He doesn’t answer, but stares into your eyes with his hooded gaze, and he manages to sneak a hand furtively under your dress not breaking the contact. His skin is warm, but you’re warmer, and his destination is even hotter. He cocks his head, fingers brushing against the soaked, sticking material you used to call panties up until fifteen minutes ago, and he must notice—his eyes grow wider, his jaw tightens and his hand gains courage.

Fuck. This should be embarrassing, getting worked up over dirty innuendos and a kiss or two, but you’re instead feeling flushed and more. More sensitive. More open to the idea of him ruining you, even though that’s not what he’s offering. Or— is he?

The question lies unanswered when his digits rub with a sparkled intensity over both your clothed sex and your inner thighs. It’s a continuous, mellifluous melody, his fingers dancing between the two until he settles on your panties only, and that’s when you almost let out a soft moan; you don’t, he raises his brow, challenging, but you don’t, and instead glance around to notice if someone has his eyes on the both of you, sitting in the furthest region of the fucking smart, endless table.

He raises the stake, flushed: Jimin pushes your panties on one side, petting with his index your exposed self, and you suck in a breath. He continues to do so, face still, closing the distance between you two.

You don’t question the sudden kiss, instead you angle your face and close your eyes and let him press his lips on you. This feels like being drunk, or high, stretching underneath a sky dripping with stars. You cup his face with your hands, his lips so terribly soft and inviting, the smallest of smiles meeting your own chapped and curved upwards lips.

It’s when you’re merely inches away from him that he thumbs at your clit, sensitive and tingling, circling with utmost peace and no speed whatsoever. You pout at little, you realize, which makes him melt either cause of your cute frown -oh, how the tables have turned- or simply because he’s the devil himself, pressing a finger against your entrance and delving it into your heat.

“Cute,” he purrs, kissing you, “Is this okay?”

The crude, hot, nerve-wracking fingering has begun, which makes you, quickly enough, putty in his hands and ablaze with ardour for this man whose rasping voice could kill you.

“Yeah,” you breathe on his mouth, eyelids drooping closed, “Yeah, all good.”

You hum to yourself as he starts pressing kisses on your jaw and your neck, a trail of treacherous flames lighting up your skin, and you have the audacity to sigh under his ministrations, a tiny, strained sound not quite a mewl.

If he hears, he doesn’t show it. You’re biting your own lip when he enters a second finger, filling your searing emptiness.

“Want three?” he asks, voice husky and as desperate as you are under his touch. He adds it when you nod, the squelch louder than before, and you moan, rocking your hips against his fingers.

“Shh, baby,” he coos, placing his other hand on your hips, slowing your movements, “Be a good girl.”

He fucks you deep, fast, fingers clashing against the silky dress you’re wearing and sweat sparkling on his forehead. He swallows another moans of yours, sucking your bottom lip and tugging it between his teeth. You’re close. You’re so close, and it’s only been a couple minutes. You can’t hear anything that isn’t your wet pussy clenching around his fingers, his rhythm ruthless and burning.

“Too bad you’re not coming on my fingers, today,” he says before kissing your neck and emptying your dripping pussy, then proceeding to taste and lick his own fingers in his mouth. He lets them out with a small pop, and it’s the most terrifying sight you’ve ever had in front of your almost watering eyes. “I’m sorry I won the bet, though, your pussy is the sweetest I’ve ever tasted.”

That’s the high and dry story of how you first met Jimin.

/

 The second time it happens, it’s under completely different circumstances, and, substantially, against your every predictions, it really happens. It takes place, like a once in a lifetime event: there’s an orgasm involved, not due to the very charming and never disappointing Jeon jungkook the robotic version, and instead it involves a rather attractive asshole with a persistent smirk plastered on his face.

Except it’s a lot more complicated than what it sounds, and most of it is Seulgi’s fault.

Your roommate had pouted all evening, because that’s what semi adults do when they’re denied a companion for the night.

“I just wanna get wasted. It’s been one hell of a month, and you know how I get when I’m stressed.”

“I can suggest you a vibrator and a bottle of vodka. Do you settle for that, your honor?”

“The more you talk like this,” all self-absorbed and assertive and cautiously, like when talking to a kid, she begins, hands in her long, mahogany hair, “the more I just wanna push you up against the wall.”

“Sounds to me you just wanna get laid.”

“Maybe I do,” she huffs, hands on her hips, the light of your abat-jour highlighting her golden skin. “Maybe I don’t. What I know is that I wanna get wasted. Come with me, pretty please?”

“Look,” you raise your eyes from the book you’ve been holding, stretching a leg onto the unmade bed of yours, “I just wanna get this fucking paper done. I need,” you grip the phone on the bed table, checking for the white, large numbers on your lock screen, “an hour. An hour and half to edit it and I’m all yours.”

“This paper is due on Thursday, though.”

“Yeah, but I have a reputation to uphold in the family. Have to be the most beautiful and successful.”

“You’re full of shit,” are her last words, muttered with a smile as she grabs her jacket.

“Hey,” you call, stretching your neck towards her, “I don’t care if it’s two am and you’re already wasted. Call me and I’ll come to you with a whole bottle of vodka to make it up to you. Hell, I’ll even kiss you goodnight.”

“I don’t wanna make out with you, you freak.”

“You didn’t say that last time, baby!”

 Seulgi

[2.13]

wassup bitch

make out with meeeeeeeeeeeeee

[location shared]

com n get me littl nuggrt

 Not Sober Seulgi is probably the worst Seulgi you have ever dealt with. You let out a sigh, eyeing the frat dorm all lit up and vibrating to the trashy trap music the insiders are jamming to.

Of course, when it comes to Not Sober Seulgi, there’s boys involved. Frat boys involved. At first, you don’t pay attention to the details, the signs, surrounding you like blinding traffic lights signalling stop stop stop, all red and striking. The thought doesn’t cross your mind, the dots connecting in some hidden part of your brain not making your insides short circuit—instead you’re knocking on the door, then banging on the very wooden entrance until a face shows up; the dorm is dimly lit, and the face is partially lightened by a soft, hued red and, that, too, Future You pinpoints, should have been a sign.

It’s useless, anyway, because you hear the insider talk and you’re burning instantly, like after touching a steaming, hot cup of coffee, except that bitter coffee is still good coffee. Smug Jimin plus bitter you isn’t really sweet, nor a match made in heaven. It’s chaotic, a caustic explosion, and you both know it, judging from the sharp smile he offers you, after blinking lazily at your figure.

“This is a mixer party only,” his soothing voice welcomes you, “Do you have an invite?”

You press your tongue on your teeth, mouth carefully closed.

“Yeah, from Hell, I’ve come to take a fallen angel.”

“Sorry to break it to you, oh-kind-lady, but we didn’t give any invite to poor, damned souls.”

“Too bad I don’t give a fuck about your policies, then,” you move towards the small space between the door and Jimin’s body, but he interferes, placing himself right between the two. “Look, I don’t give a single fuck about this party.”

“Yeah, it sure looks like it.”

You roll your eyes. “My friend is here. She’s most certainly not sober and I’ve come to pick her up. That’s it. Do you think I want to be here, among these drunk, perverted jocks?”

He turns around, stretching his neck, his eyes darting through the crowd, inhibited by alcohol, smelling like cheap beer and weed. The moment his eyes bore into yours, though, it’s terrifying; it’s a rustled reminder of Seokjin’s wedding Jimin, and you don’t like it. You loathe it. You dread it.

“Maybe only some of us.”

He tips his head, lips curving into a timid, small smile, and you tear your gaze from his lips in a heartbeat.

“Yeah, keep dreaming of it. I just want my friend back.” You point your chin towards the amalgam of drunk party animals, “I’ll leave you to your immensely interesting activities, then.”

“What if,” he begins, “You don’t. Or—even better scenario, you leave with me.”

“Best case scenario, I leave with my friend. You stay here.”

“What’s the worst-case scenario, then?”

You cock a brow at him, crossing your arms on your chest. “I leave with my friend, you stay here. Sometime before me leaving, you’re punched. Or kicked. I don’t know. There’s a high chance I’ll throw a drink on you.”

“That implies you’ll be here long enough to grab a drink, doesn’t it? And you don’t have to ruin my shirt to get me naked, babe. Just ask nicely.”

You huff, and you’re mildly tempted to shove him against a wall. Or ruin him. Not in the funny way. More like the high and dry way, the one he knows so well. “I changed my mind, I’ll kick you.”

“Ask nicely?” His teasing tone makes your cheeks flush, and you hope the shitplace with subdued lightening can cover it. His expression shifts into an arrogant one, full smirk and little dimples out, so your cute guess is that he can see. He sees his effect on you, albeit completely unwanted and full of hatred from your side, and he enjoys it. Actually lulls in it, letting out a small laugh which, in turn, makes his eyes turn into crescents, all warm and cute—all things he’s not. All things you know he’s not.

“Ask nicely,” you repeat, rolling the words on your tongue, “Okay, babe. Let’s do this, babe. What do you want from me, babe?”

“Has it ever crossed your mind that maybe the answer is you?”

“Yes, actually,” you sigh, fingers brushing his neck, face comically close to his perfect, chiselled one, “That’s exactly what I thought when you stopped fingering me.”

“Right,” Jimin has the audacity to smile, craning his neck as if to close the distance between you in order to meet you for a kiss, “I’m a man of word, thought. You should be impressed.”

“I’m pretty sure the only thing that’s impressed is your face under the orgasm denial definition. Google it, babe, I guarantee you the meaning comes with your name and a brilliant review of one star.”

“Unlike you.” He licks his lips, eyes on your pretty pink ones, smeared with venom, “You’re not coming.” He explains, to further ignite your rage.

“And whose fault is that, babe?”

Jimin nuzzles into your neck, cupping your other cheek with his rough palm, and his thumb stills on your throat, right where your breath is stuck. He adds pressure on it, lips fondling your burning skin, his usual smirk plastered on them.

“Let me make it up to you.”

“You’re not fucking me,” you spit back, mouth now millimetres away from his, gently inviting you to kiss it, and cherish it, and biting it until you’re satisfied with the hot result.

“I’ll eat you out? Until you come.” He hums. “You’ll come.”

His voice is a mere strangled sound, wanting and dripping with need, and you snap out of it with a small smile.

“Nice offer,” your smile is wicked as you scrape his nape with a feathery touch, the slow movement rousing a flutter in your lower belly. “But get in line, babe.”

His shell-shocked face is the last thing you see before you fulfil the let’s rescue Seulgi! party.

 (“Why do you smell like softener?” Seulgi sniffs you, arms looped loosely around your neck, eyes completely shut down. It’s a nice sight, all things considered. You’re no angel, no saint, no perfect person, but you’re a nice friend, and that’s probably the most Seokjin trait you recognize in yourself. It’s your shared apartment, and it’s past 3 am and you’re the one good friend who keeps her promises. “It’s strawberry vodka, you heathen.”)

 The line turns out to be a real line, queue line, let’s get this coffee line, which, well. How can one word it, how can one phrase it fully catching the irony of it all, the distinctive je ne sais quoi of life without—

“Nice to see you here.”

It’s the perfect set for a rom-com, you notice, taking in the warm scenery around you. What else can one dream of, right? The campus coffee shop, the campus hot not-really-but-also-kinda fuckboy Jimin, partial jock to give him credit, full time attractive idiot with a tendency for orgasm denial. Really.

“What are the chances?” You exhale, voice devoid of emotions. For the sake of your parents’ integrity, you suppose, because they raised no impolite woman, of course, you turn around to face the angel-like human being, black hair partially covering his forehead, little dimples on full display. That’s—that is lack of integrity, or indecency or au-fucking-dacity. It might as well be a mix of the above-mentioned possibilities, all fitting and nurturing you because he’s gorgeous. He’s handsome. Jimin’s the most attractive human being you’ve ever seen in your life, and it’s not fair.

(Beside the fact that you’ve lived with Kim Seokjin, for fuck’s sake)

He pokes his own cheek, and you bask into the otherworldly scenario that takes place right in front of your caffeine deprived eyes. It’s a sight for sore, soft eyes, and it’s the end of the world as you know it, because it’s morning, too early to properly function like a normal human being, but there he is. There he is, Jimin, channelling his inner boyfriend material aura, oozing off boyfriend smell, nice, fresh, aftershave smell, rocking a stupid sweater and the messiest black mop of hair.

It’s honestly a tragedy, and you won’t stand for it. You will make a move—

“You’re squinting your eyes, like, real tight. Are you alright?”

Just ogling you, your drowsy mind offers, the fucking cheater.

“Yeah,” you reply, swallowing a lump in your dry throat, “Just need coffee. A latte. Anything.”

You move forward in the queue, and as you blink you realize it’s your turn, until it’s not anymore. Jimin carefully and gently moves you out of the way, brushing with the softest touch your side.

“A latte and an iced americano, please.”

The sweetened order for two turns into a hushed thank you, a tipped smile, a flutter of you heart. It’s drinks still half full, his curious gaze darting on your lips, your defences down. It’s unfair, because in a hot second all this pent-up tension shifts into a light, chaste kiss, your back pressed against the coffee shop’s restroom; your chest heaves under his tantalizing make-out session with your neck, followed by his frantic lips pressing on yours, his tongue licking lazily into your mouth, a gasp easing its way out of your warm and eager mouth. It’s a hot-blooded supercut, each frame announced by a starving moan, a content sigh, and, before you realise it, you’re on your bed, Jimin hovering on top of you.

It’s Saturday morning, you hum to yourself, fingers sliding into his hair, all’s in check. There’s a warm body slumped on yours, his tongue swerving on your lower lip and his hips shyly bucking between your open legs. Your panties are drenched, you can feel his hard on through the jeans and, really, all’s in check.

He nudges your nose with his. “Lemme eat you out.”

The answer lies sitting on the tip of your tongue, right next to an obnoxious remark that you hope will rile him up enough for him to rip your underwear, which you definitely won’t complain about. However, the words don’t come out, they slur in your craving mouth the second he gets up and shoves you toward the end of your unmade bed, spreading your naked legs open with his calloused palms.

“Nice skirt,” he comments, voice a rasp, eyeing the drenched, lilac underwear, skirt at this point gone up to cover your stomach. “I just want…”

He shuffles closer, enough for you to feel his hot breath on your core, and that’s when Jimin pulls the panties on a side, teasing you with little licks to your entrance. You’re responsive, too eager for anything to quench your thirst that you sigh happily at the barest of actions, gripping strands of his hair. Jimin chuckles, engulfing the throbbing clit in his mouth in one go and drawing desperate moans out of your cute, devilish mouth.

“Fuckboy move,” you emit, voice cracking at the pressure of his warm mouth, “Oh, oh. Fuck…”

He replies flattening his tongue on your core, then licking and lapping against your dripping folds. Jimin positively glows at the cries you let out, face slobbering with your arousal while driving you insane, fucking with his tongue like his life depended on it. It’s almost a spiritual experience, a crescendo of wails and sobs, his face drown in your pussy and his tongue paying reverence to your approaching orgasm. He can feel it in the way you writhe, in his hand splaying over your stomach, keeping you still while he eats you religiously, forehead beaded with sweat.

You come with a trembling hand in his hair, the other flicking your bare nipple, back slightly arched and a lewd mewl; Jimin takes in the way your body trembles, your breath all staggered because of him, and the sight alone is enough for him to cum in his pants with a grunt, completely untouched.

The second time it happens is, coincidentally, the first time Jimin knows there’s no turning back from this.

/

Complicated is a big word when it comes to relationship, you reckon, emitting something akin to a gasp, truly soap operas worthy material, but, for the first time in your life, you decide to name it this way.

Being with Jimin is… complicated, for starters. Especially because you’re not with Jimin, in the strict, relationship-wise meaning. He knows your favourite colour (“Why the fuck you only own purple underwear?” “It’s lilac, dick, watch your mouth.” “Watch your own mouth, babe. You’re the one on your knees.”), your favourite food (“But you like having your mouth stuffed with my cock, honey.” You sigh, blushing. “First of all, I’m talking about real food. That amazing steak kind of food—“

“I’ll show you real meat, babe.”

“Gross. Gross. How can I cancel the last five seconds of my life?”

“Come here, Jared, nineteen,” he half smiles, tilting his head, “I’ll get us fries.”), your favourite movie (“We can’t get each other off every time your ugly paper cap fits—oh,” you suck in a breath, Jimin flicking his tongue on your turgid nipple, “oh, god, don’t stop.”), your best friend’s name (“I condone you dicking her so good she sometimes cries, you know, I just don’t when I’m in the room next to hers and all I can hear is my best friend trying to formulate a single coherent word but failing because you’re pounding her mercilessly into the mattress.” Jimin chuckles, grabbing his jacket before holding the doorknob. “She begged, Seulgi.”)—so what? It’s not like you sat down and decided not to ask each other dumb questions, so that you could find out in the funny, kinky way. For fuck’s sake, you didn’t even decide on anything, didn’t even talk about talking, because the relationship related shit didn’t even cross your mind.

It’s even quite fucking hard for it to cross it, because half the time you’re together you’re either both naked – except for the time he pleaded for the tartan mini to stay – or stuffing your mouth with food—because, if there’s something you’ve learned after one too many hook-ups with him is that this kind of sex requires strength. Like, actual, physical strength, if we’re not talking about the this test is draining me please fuck me until I can’t walk sex. Which, yeah, 10/10 would recommend. That was the day Seulgi decided to invest in ear plugs while muttering capitalism, here I come.

You also came.

Funnily enough, guess who also came. Not in the funny, kinky way. Think about the grossest thing, imagine the beyond the bounds of possibility, sprinkle it with Jimin earnestly shoving his dick down your throat, stir it with a poor Taehyung brushing his teeth next to the both of you, a step away from the shower, and serve it on the most expensive plate in the kitchen, a recipe not approved by Kim Seokjin.

Yeah, you mentally roll your eyes, licking your lips clean, at eye-level with your sorta enemy with benefits’ pretty dick: the married brother of yours, former fratboy, taller than your current will to live.

In hindsight, maybe it is Seokjin’s fault. Once you’re married, you’re supposed to be committed to the cause, and sometimes, an angry little crumb in you finds the audacity to speak, the cause is made up of your four walls: ergo home, ergo your married life, miles away from the absurdity that once filled his university days. You’re being hypocritical, you realize, skin wet, body trembling. In the simplest, most hedonistic terms, you’re done with the chaos in this fraternity and just wished that hooking up was easier. It’s more than a stolen orgasm, a random spur of pleasure and free de-stresser; it’s also something not quite like art but just as peculiar. Sex with Jimin is more than nice, more than a fast rummage of clothes on the floor and panties teared, or condoms stuffed in every single pocket of his jacket.

It should also be noticed that it’s been one hell of a stressful week, okay, which means that it’s one of those times you seek for naked intimacy, in its least literal meaning. You’re looking for something sure, something silent, something earnest. Jimin gives you that in the simplest of forms, in the easiest of ways. It’s not fair for your brother to come unannounced and burst into the house with his adorable laugh and love for his own brothers. Way to ruin the moment, bro.

Jimin blinks attentively when Taehyung laughs, clapping his hands all happy and following the elder’s voice outside the bathroom.

“I’m getting you my clothes.”

“Wait, what?”

His lips part just enough for his tongue to wet them, and your eyes follow in silence the gesture.

“I mean,” he starts, grabbing a towel, “You either come out with me from this bathroom or you don’t.”

He’s concise, yet harsh, words uttered with those soft lips yet are just as hot as a slap in your face. He’s telling the truth, but you soon find out you don’t really like it.

There’s something abrupt and severe in those chosen words, so well picked out because they’re not meant to hurt, but at the same time they’re so worrying. So terrible, practically as hard as a punch in your guts.

You either come out of the bathroom with him — you had been blowing minutes before, hadn’t you? Quite the intimacy, huh? — or you don’t. You stay behind. Different rooms, a whole door to separate you while he’s out with the people he cares about.

Seems legit, but. It’s unfair. You know Jimin isn’t choosing for you, but it’s obvious he’s inclined towards an option between the two, and you’re terrified to discover whether it’s his own desire pushing or what he thinks you want.

You, instead, push the thought aside when you nod, taking the towel from his hands and covering your body from this terrific half hook-up.

Because that’s what it is—that’s what you are.

It dawns upon you like a cold breeze hitting your face in full December, suddenly, and that’s when you realize winter is near. In your mind, this hooking up scenario seemed nicer. Sounded softer, a cute bubble moving slowly in the air.

But now—well, now the bubble has burst, and it feels wrong, and this unexpected wrong doesn’t feel right in your chest, and that’s the story of how you leave the house escaping from his window, in his clothes, with vision blurred by hot, stupid, idiotic tears.

/

Seulgi is the first one to notice, and, obviously, the first one to speak.

“Something’s been bothering you,” she says, head tilted in a way that’s supposed to be emphatic and worried but comes off as stiff and terrified. “Care to share?”

It’s just a wholesome amount of terrifying stuff, isn’t it? First the shower incident, now Seulgi’s ways not working around you anymore. What’s next? Avoiding Jimin for a whole week? Blocking his number? Losing the smart and beautiful title to your obnoxious brother?

You wouldn’t be surprised, really. Shit like this always happens at the same fucking time.

“It’s nothing. A stressful couple days, maybe? Or maybe I’m getting sick. There’s a guy always coughing during Physics. Maybe it’s his fault, who knows.”

Seulgi unlocks her phone, an unreadable gaze studying you. She gives up a second later, though, her weak maybe reaching your ears when you’ve already looked down on your book.

One simply cannot be annoyed because of a half hook up. Christ. You deserve better than that. You have some dignity left, tainted by everything that’s not Jimin and his harsh, stupid words.

So, your mind offers, while you squint your eyes, I suppose there’s nothing else you could do about it.

Nothing else besides acknowledging it and moving on.

Sounds like a plan. A fireproof plan, an escape plan, something detailed and precise. Planned to work out smoothly; planned to be executed without pain or mistakes.

/

It’s seven sharp when he knocks, takeout in his left hand, eyes bulging because it’s fucking freezing outside.

“It’s fucking freezing, what the fuck.” He says out loud, indeed. What he receives as an answer is the sound of your tongue clicking, the biggest amount of interest you’ve shown towards him the whole week. He would finally exhale, weren’t it for the fact that this is still pretty traumatic, because if there’s something he’s learned while orbiting around you, is that you’re constantly awake and aware of your surroundings. Your body language says that you pay attention to him, or Seulgi, or whoever you’re talking to. You follow the guy with your eyes, and you listen and nod in all the right places during a conversation, and you search for his dark gaze when he’s fucking you in the dimly lit bedroom, the bed creaking under your sweaty sex making. He’s not admitting it, he never will, and he’ll pretty much deny this to everyone who will ask but: there’s something hot about it. Something burning with the way your body reacts to him, when your eyes follow his actions, while your voice falters when he fucks you right, and it somehow pushes him to the edge every time. It’s the equivalent of Jungkook getting a boner in the gym while catching girls and boys drooling at him, except he’s talking about you and your crazy moans, your magic aura.

And yes, okay, fucking blame him, the realization alone made him jerk off in his room like a teen, twice, yesterday. That’s a fact. That’s barely a fact, alright? This is a truth; a statement soon forgot by the knowers. Obviously.

You look spent, he thinks, if he had to choose a word, dared by some arrogant deity to define the current mess you were. He glances at your barely done ponytail, at the tiredness written all over your face. He takes in your baggy sweater, your quiet beauty, knowing this is gonna be one of those nights you take a step back.

He doesn’t say anything though, instead he brushes the hair on your forehead, not even making contact with your skin.

You grab the bag from his hands, shivering instantly and hoping he doesn’t read the signs. They’re—they’re there, you know, you’re collecting them slowly, one after another, grabbing one and looking cautiously for the following one, hoping it’s not there. Hoping it doesn’t exist.

You exhale a sigh, disguising it as cough, a noise, something distracting Jimin from his silent staring, which is, funnily enough, loud and cacophonic.

“Hungry,” you state, the single word weighting more because of the soft pout on your lips. Jimin hates that he knows what it means, that it’s gonna be just the two of you this time, no chill whatsoever, no bodies touching and melting against each-other. He’s not complaining, what the fuck, he’s not an idiot. He’s not even mad, he’s just—accepting, on a level. This is the point of no return, he guesses, following you on the couch and admiring the laptop’s screen reflected on your face.

He doesn’t say anything when you search for Brooklyn 99 on Netflix, because he’d say everything, otherwise. He’d mumble something along the lines of this feels real, we could do this all the time, or, worst of all: I like this. I like you.

So, in order: he tugs at your sleeves and scoots you closer to him, and you say absolutely nothing at the gesture. He’s ecstatic on the inside, partially terrified, mostly delusional. He pretends he’s something more when you lean on him, the slightest pressure of your head on his shoulder. He cares zero fucks about the show when he’s breathing your scent in and feels how warm you are and shuts his eyelids down when he pictures you adoring him. Liking him. Liking him a whole lot more—

He’s fucked, he realises, hours later, when you doze off and he has to carry you to bed, something you claim of loathing, which—what on earth. It’s an unfathomable absurdity, that’s what it is.

“You can stay.”

His voice falters. “What?”

You cough, eyes closed as you speak sinful words: “The night, I mean. It’s fucking freezing outside.”

His lips form a small o, and it’s hot all of a sudden. “Alright,” he manages, staring at you on your bed, hands fidgety and heartbeat accelerated for some reason, “Make space for me. Hey, fucker. I’m serious. Let me in.”

You do.

(to be continued. ily)

[smileysuh]

hi mum, so lately i’ve been taking time to reflect my life and I realised like, how much my life revolves around kpop. like, I just got into kpop around a year ago and it makes me so happy and so drained at the same time idk how to explain it but basically, all I’ve been thinking about these past few days is how different my life would be if I wasn’t into kpop. Tonight, out of nowhere I decided to unsub all kpop channels on yt, I deleted vlive and also set a time limit on insta since I find myself scrolling on there a lot, just looking at kpop content for hours at a time. Am I being dramatic? Idk, I just feel so tired, I’m disappointed at myself for not being able to like, hold back this obsession ya know? Cause I’m starting uni soon and every day I keep thinking why am I wasting my time watching kpop when I could be studying and preparing for uni?? What’s wrong with me lol?? Anyways, just needed to rant, feel free to not reply to this, I’m crying as I’m typing this I just feel kinda lost right now but I rlly hope ur doing good mumm💚💚

Hello baby! Ok, so first, I understand you completely

I’m also the type of have hyper fixations and then that’s my only source of serotonin

Kpop is such a pure, good, consistent source of happiness, and in the world we’re in right now, I don’t think it’s a shock at all that we’ve both glommed onto kpop- I think a lot of people might be going through exactly what you’re going through

Don’t beat yourself up about it my love, we’re allowed to have things we enjoy-

I feel like we live in a society that A; makes people feel bad for doing things for themselves cuz capitalism and the need to constantly be producing and doing things and social media and just oooof, and B: we have a society that looks down on the things “girls” do for fun- like when have our enjoyments of one direction or loki or anything been seen as a positive? Our society is SO restrictive on what women feel were allowed to enjoy-

But look, if kpop makes you happy then it makes you happy!

Limitations can be good, spending too much time on ur screen is NEVER a good thing cuz we can get so caught up in it- as people say “go outside and touch concrete” 😂😂😂😂 but don’t feel ashamed that kpop is your happy place

Maybe do it where like, at the end of ur day, u can have an hour of kpop YouTube crack, or read a fanfic, or something like that, limits are good but don’t cut off ur serotonin source completely you know?

Ur not being dramatic my love :) it’s really hard to live in the world we live in and have lots of our interests be belittled by everyone around us- like why is it SO MUCH BETTER if you spent all this time researching cars or something you know? Like why is it our likes are lesser cuz we fall in love with people and the psychology and the fun we have watching them?

To me, kpop is kind of like our version of reality tv, and u know how many people feel justified as shit knowing everything about Kylie and Kendal and what scandal Kim got into this week and who’s dating who and-

No hate to people who like the kardashians cuz Oof I went through a reality tv phase too

But I hope you get what I’m saying and I’m not being too rambly kdhejsijssb

So I don’t allow direct messages from people I don’t follow, but if you ever need anything, message me off anon, I’ll follow back immediately and then we can chat in dms :) sometimes it’s just about finding a friend to love this stuff with and that can make it feel oddly more justified?

I just- you’re not being dramatic, things are rough, thank you for reaching out honey, I’m here if you ever need it ❤️

Also if it’s any consolation, I was having these same issues last year, and I ended up making every creative writing project I had to do about a kpop boy and it helped me get through my courses cuz suddenly I wasn’t just completing an assignment about a dude in a grocery store, it was MARK TUAN or like- I straight up submitted demon San and got a 90 on it- idhejsnsjsisubss kpop can be helpful 😂

Or for example, in my poetry class, I was looking at the way Korean sentences are formed and the way they do those fun games where they take a word and split it into syllables to make new sentences and I tried that in my poetry and it was really cool!

The things you learn watching kpop- even just all the things I’ve learned about Korea and the culture- there are SO MANY POSITIVES to enjoying kpop and I don’t want u to feel like ur wasting ur time cuz if nothing else ur probably soaking up some of the language too! And who knows! Maybe u can find some uni friend who like kpop, or maybe there’s a kpop club! Don’t feel alone baby, I’m sure there are lots of other people entering uni with u going through a similar “ooof kpop” moment ;)

U could also always bribe urself with kpop- I would do like: complete this essay outline and then u get to watch the new weekly idol, or things like that?

But yes please message me off anon and I’ll be here to help more if none of these work for you :) I love you, youll get through this ❤️❤️❤️and remember: u are allowed to have things in your life that you love that make you happy that don’t actually add things to ur day to day, ur allowed to just be happy with that thing

[lady-plantagenet]

Ship bingo: Anne Boleyn & Henry VIII (I know, I'm not the most original person in this site); and Eleanor Cobham & Humphrey of Gloucester

Hey hey sorry for answering this shipbingo so late hh. Hope you’ll still be interested in my odd and headcanon-y analyses. Since you requested 2 I will write shorter comments if ur ok with that :) x

Anne Boleyn & Henry VIII

‘I broke England from the Church yeah I really am that secksy’ or something along the lines is said by Anne’s character in Six: The Musical. I sorta resent that. I’m not very passionate about this ship nor do I take any ‘sides’, but I must admit I’m more partial to Catherine of Aragon and consider her to be Henry’s true love. The odd thing is, this is also cause a part of my feels like Anne was in some ways to good/evolved for him?? We all know the whole seductress Anne trope or poor set-up pawn Anne, we don’t know which are true but one thing we know for sure is that there was ‘pious outspoken religious reformer Anne’ and that’s what I am more interested in. My admiration grew 1000x when I realised she was heavily critical with where the desolution of the monastery funds were going - how they enriched ministers and lackeys of Henry as opposed to going towards schools. I say all this because my mental Anne Boleyn might be a bit different from most people’s and that will influence how I also see this ship.

I guess the above paragraph explains the ‘I’m picky about it part’, I hate anything that is major baby drama. Delicious and intrigued are oddly left out because I don’t really feel that myself though I understand why others would. It is perhaps because it’s such an overportrayed relationship and because by the time it became a thing Henry was already kind of obese I believe. Sue me, I like both my ship parties to be attractive XD. I would read fic for it just like I would read anything provided it is well written enough. I’m currently reading ‘Chained in War and Love’ by Lady Perserverence on AO3 (you know that one really famous fic in the Tudor fandom) which I suppose counts but since it’s a Francois I of France/Anne Boleyn AU I guess it doesn’t count (and I much prefer this pairing). This ship is one of those historical pairings where it’s hard to deny it was not romantic and sexual, one must remember that there must have been something about Anne in particular that attracted Henry and her educational background was unusually worldly for a woman of minor English nobility, given the fact that she could very well have been 32 (and age which is considered old for motherhood even by our times) by the time she married Henry simply put there must have been a romantic/sexual attraction beyond just her being fertile. She, herself, may have also had reason to feel attracted to him (despite his fatness) because he appears to have exuded the character of a Renaissance Prince which I feel she could have been drawn towards.

To be honest the ‘it’s complicated and unhealthily’ kind of speak for themselves. I feel like a part of the breakdown went beyond her not being able to hear a son because he does not seem to have properly tried like he did with Catherine of Aragon - the marriage was only three years long. I also feel like he was a bit too set in the past for her and she may have felt disillusioned with how he carried out the reformation. I also feel like Henry thought he would find a woman with Catherine’s brand of strength but with an ability to bear children, but despite both women having education in common Anne’s Protestant beliefs made her someone entirely different. Their feelings were strong but they clearly were not made for each other. With that said, theology fasincates me so to an extent I am more interested in the consequences (the reformation and how it changed the fabric of England) then even the ship itself - that is not to say the ship doesn’t interest me. And yes. I could/want to be convinced that this ship is interesting but if anyone wants me to get on board you will have to first throw off ‘seductress Anne’ or ‘poor maligned pawn Anne’. Only mercurial Henry and reformer Anne will do for me. With that said, I really wouldn’t mind the unrequited love trope thrown in there but with Anne accepting him only because Cromwell and co convince her that this is the only way England’s religion can change. I also liked the ‘Anne of One Thousand Days’ spin where it’s unrequited on her side and then turns unrequited on Henry’s side. Now that’s super tragic and would grab my attention. Overall, I like Anne Boleyn but I don’t ship them because I don’t think they were compatible, I don’t like Henry and I hate how the reformation was carried out and how the knock-on effect was the death of the Tudor figures I care the most about: Cardinal Fisher, Thomas More and Margaret Pole.

Eleanor Cobham & Humphrey of Gloucester

I love ships where both figures were described as intelligent by their contemporaries because there’s also a meeting of minds there. It also gives this partners in crime vibes which I really like. This connects to my whole ’delicious’, ‘romantic’, ‘best friends’ and ‘I’m intrigued’. A lot of fun things could be done with this ship and so I would read fic for it but I remain unpicky (except for , you know, prose as per usual). As it happens I also already read fic for this pairing and unless you are her, I would recommend @nuingiliath who writes loads for this couple and is the resident shipper - I believe this is her OTP. On Ao3 she is ‘heartofstanding’ she has plenty of stuff both on her tumblr and on that site so just follow the tags. Also all I know about these guys is from her pretty much.

The thing is, Eleanor Cobham is like Jane Shore for me, she brings out very weird feelings because I am very traditionalist and boring and hate my infidelities and tend to have an aversion towards mistresses. However, like Jane Shore, Eleanor Cobham appears to have had some virtues and was more than a pretty face (apparently Jacobia herself was quite dull and that’s one of the things that turned Humphrey off her but I’m not sure if that’s hearsay). So just like that, I don’t get an ‘ugh’ feeling like I would with people interested in the Bourbon mistresses in the 18th century or such because I much feel like it wasn’t that physical. This is where ‘softly’ comes, the age difference makes me imagine Humphrey as having that dad-aura Idk (and btw no I’m not pleading daddy issues at all - I feel like it quite undermines this couple), his incredible level of learning further feading into this wise persona but obviously his skirmishes with the administration give me an impression of this grand daring man as well. He seemed the picture of true aristocracy and in all the way he falters from those expectations (eg lack of martial talent) I also like to see. As I said, Eleanor also being described as intelligent makes me feel that she was at his level and while I am satisfied that the necromancy charges were shams it does indicate that she was considered bright enough by her contemporaries in order for such charges to be levelled in the first place. While it is true that the whole affair was targeting Humphrey, I really feel like Eleanor herself possessed (or at least was perceived by others as possessing) a certain dangerousness and this course of action was pursued by their rivals in order to kill two birds with one stone. After all, we have seen how easy treason charges can be conjured against magnates who though not technically speaking guilty have acted against the wrong faction eg Clarence’s case. With that I also put ‘best friends’ because I feel like like all those traits derived from the facts I’ve been privy to point to the fact that the two were friends as well as in love and attracted to each other. They really give me a partners-in-crime vibe and I’m always all for that. Not to mention I’m also a sucker of one part of the ship dying (preferably the woman) with the other following not late after or at least never living a fulfilled life as a widow-widower. It’s cruel but I love my doomed couples. So yeah, I ship it, I really do. I also have a great admiration for Humphrey as I have a soft-heart for scholarly people, I also admire how he was not blindly loyal and quite brazen. It’s a personality that intrigues me.

[jaehyunsuh]

hii ! i was wondering if i could get a ship for each unit (i love ur work btw 🥺)

i am an esfp-t (entertainer) and an achiever (sorry i forgot what number it was 😭) on the enneagram test

i am of chinese ethnicity and i have long dark brown hair with blond peekaboo highlights :) my height is 167cm and i weigh 47kg

i have quite a resting bitch face so almost all of my friends and mutuals said they were rlly intimidated by me at first but when i warmed up to them they realised that im the kinda random and spontaneous one in the group (like i kinda do weird things sometimes hehe and im pretty loud at times) also tbh i dont like authority and i dont particularly like to follow rules (im the kid who never listens in class oop)

i have a tiger mother ☹️ shes kinda like one of those rich asian ladies who believe anything they say/believe overrides the beliefs of others and the type that likes to use her children to her benefit (sorry i may sound conceited and ungrateful but my mother is not a really kind person) she puts studies before health and likes to overwork people and i think that growing up in this toxic environment has led me to dislike authority so much and not be willing to go down the career path she has chosen for me (aka medicine)

i think im pretty emotional at times for situations that others might not find worth thinking too much about (basically just a mass overthinker 😔🤚🏻) and this is just a weird fact but i dont think i ever rlly cry when im sad like i cry 99% of the time because im angry or frustrated or indignant about something. maybe sadness was the initial emotion but it always develops into one of the mentioned emotions before the tears come yay

also i LOVE pda and skinship in general :) this might sound weird but hickeys are so cute to me idk why hhhhh and i like to be the small spoon when cuddling ☺️ (yes i like taller guys but the members you decide dont have to be the tallest :))

another thing is that im a dancer ! ive been dancing for 12 years now and i really really love using my body to express myself :) when i was rlly young i started with ballet to get my foundations right and then i progressed to jazz (because ballet was too much effort 🥲) and then later contemporary/lyrical and now i kinda stick to urban/kpop style 👍🏻

also this is irrelevant but yg is having global auditions soon in the city i live in so yeah i rlly hope i have a bit of luck because being able to dance and sing has been my DREAM since i was a kid 🥺

anyways i hope i didnt give toooo much unnecessary info and thank you so much ily 🤍🤍

hey! I wish you all the best, from the bottom of my heart I hope that you really go to the yg audition and you do well💕 good luck! I hope i’m writing this for a future idol, pls don’t forget me when you are famous lol

top 3

haechan

let’s start with the fact that would loooove that you are so spontaneous, I think we all can tell that haechan is a free spirit and that he constantly wants to do stuff, have fun and live life. He would support you in any of the random stuff that you want to do, and he would follow you in any impulsive plan that you have out of nowhere. He would just feel so excited about it and he would be so comfortable too. I think he also doesn’t listen to other easily and always wants to do what he wants, so I think that would make you to understand each other really well. He is a rebel to, he definitely is, so he would be really attracted to that part of you. He would see the whole situation with your family and your career and all of that, he would be super supportive, he would tell you to follow your dreams, do what you love and what you that’s the best for you. I mean it, he would be super intese and he would really want you to do what you really like, he would probably even talk to your mom about it lol. He would just care a lot about your well being. Since you are a dancer and love dancing he would encourage you to join an academy, a company, go to an audition, because he knows it would make you happy. When you cry a lot and start being really emotional he would be there for you, get you back to your senses and let you know that everything is gonna be okay. He loves skinship a lot so he would always be all over you, kissing and hugging you the whole day!!

jeno

I just think Jeno would be such a good boyfriend to anyone and he would know how to adapt to a lot personalities. He is really chill and he likes calm, but someone as spontaneous as you would just make his life more exciting and he would have a lot of fun being around you and trying to take care of you while you are doing random stuff. When you don’t listen to others and just do what you want he would laugh a lot because he loves that you are like that. He loves that you are so determined and that in important situations you go with your decision, he would admire that a lot. When you are being to rebellious he would try his best to make you cool down a little bit and relax, he doesn’t want you to go all crazy lol. He would take care of you a lot, always wanting to know how you are feeling, what you are doing and just everything that has to do with you in general. He would want you to purchase dancing since you really love it a lot, he would have deep conversations about this. He would like to do some dances with you and that would be the coolest thing ever. When you start to be really emotional about something he would worry a lot and he would always be there for you so you have someone to rely on. I feel that he wouldn’t really be into pda but he likes having skinship with you, always hugging you and giving you the softest kisses.

johnny

Johnny is such a fun and cool guy to be around. His personality woud go really good with yours, he likes to have fun so he would always want to spend time with you, so like that we would enjoy all of the random stuff and the random plans that you figure out. He would always make you company, he wants to take care of you and be there for you for anything that you need. I think he really expresses his opinions, but he still considers that you are a little bit more rebellious than him, he would fins it really attractive and bold from you, but he would also tell you when you need to step down a little. He would always want the best for you, so when it comes to you carrer choice he would want you to do what you really like, he would be really worried if you feel upset by doing other thing. Tbh, I also feel like he would try his best to even talk to your mom about it. When you are being emotional he would try to make you laugh and forget a little bit about the situation. He would like to have you wrapped around his arms and kiss forever.

[dimpledpran]

me beginning to read ur response; are we the same person? lol completely feel the homebody/fic reading/picky eater, that sounds like a nice time tbh hehe...ahh yes that's good, im the same way i will listen to a bit of everything! but oh i used to love 1D, and ed sheeran is p good too, honestly i only ever heard his first two albums lmao then the next one i kinda didn't vibe too much w it lmao oops. LITTLE MIX THEY ARE MY ABSOLUTE FAVE! god, did u see the jesy news? how we holdin up? (1/?)

oh that is so exciting! what kind of dancing? (continues to read and realizes u answered this as u went lmao srry) oof i admire anyone that has rhythm in their bones cause lord knows i can't dance to save my life lmao but wow wow ok that sounds really really cool! i hope u can go back to dancing&such if u really enjoy it! sounds really cool tbh SINGING IS ALWAYS GREAT NO MATTER THE TALENT YOLO lmao don't let anyone stop u from ever singing lol. sounds like uve done some good ol tv watching (2/?)

oh man ice cream is well deserved and received on any day good or bad but ahhh yes pls a good ol fic can always be a good mood lift :')) i love this we've got quite a few shared interests and such its p cool considering we are the same age!! well im 26 still but i turn 27 in feb lol so but skdlfjs seems like u really loveeee food that is great! and aww the mom food comment, ok same here. u have really good taste in food! u know ive never had indian food! i wanna try some! (3/?)

i can't seem to find any other asks we have shared? i could have sworn i had sent a couple other ones? and u answered? i sha;; go thrpugh your blog since its not in the tag ok! don't wanna leave something un-replied too heh (4??/?) << i think

found it! i knew it! us 'adults' have such busy schedules huh lol i hope you've been resting better these days and not staying up TOO late lol do let me know when ur ss thing happens! wanna hear all abt it heh but anyways lovely i hope ur doing well! taking care of urself and having a nice time! stay safe and i will be back soon!!(5/5)

Hiya love! I shall once again leave my response below the cut. :)

Hahah yay! Glad to know I am not alone in that! 🙈

Used to listen to 1D? Not anymore? I’m offended on their behalf. Just joking. Who are your fave artists?Ed’s first two albums are amazing, the recent one is more pop, but there are a few beautiful songs! YESS! OMG LM ARE SO UNDERRATED AND IT IS DEPRESSING! yeah, I saw the news. I am upset, but I also really am happy that she finally can focus on herself. The industry is too messed up and I hope she gets to where she wants to be mentally and emotionally. She really deserves the best! How are you coping with that?

I have a friend who has no sense of rhythm, is stiff as a rock. We ended up being partners when we learnt Salsa in school, and she chose to be the “lead” and i was to follow her. It was not an easy ride, but in the end we got a B for the exam. So i believe that if she can get a B, anyone can dance! Just gotta keep trying! 💪 HAHAHAH IKR! it is always fun to just belt out and have bathroom concerts! My neighbours should be honoured to listen to me! 😂😂Hahah yeah. the TV watching is what lead me to creating this blog, so no complaints. 

Awww that’s so cool! We are of similar age and have so much in common! Yeah, I am a bit of a paradox. Like I am very picky with food, but I also really love food. haha.  Yess! Mum food is always the best! OMG you should try Indian food!! It depends on if you like more sweet or spicy or sour stuff, but there is pretty much something for everyone in Indian cuisine! Where are you from btw? I dont think I asked this before. (I am sorry if i alr did, and this is a repeat qn)

Oh god! I am so sorry!! I didnt realise that I misspelt the tag, so it was mzdsnetcc instead of mdzsnetcc.. I am sorry that you had to scroll through and find it. But I have rectified it, and I will make sure i spell it correctly henceforth. 

Definitely have been resting better! Thank you! Yeah, working life is more hectic, but i honestly will take this over schooling again. I am so glad to be done with studying. My office SS is finally happening tmr! I can tell you about it next time on how it goes! Thank you for your lovely message! I hope you are having a great week! I believe you have tmr off, so I hope you enjoy your break! Hope you get to do something fun! Take care and stay safe! 🥰🥰

[marcarella-pizza]

Colouring/ Shading/ Lighting for Digital art

HI! Hello~ I’m here and I have a teeny tiny tutorial for you today (courtesy of dear Melito who actually wants my help??? I’m??? Blessed??? I realise that there’s a lot of you who have no clue who the fuck this person I’m referring to is, oh well, not my problem — ur missing out on hella great cake.)

So I have a timelapse of everything (below, duh, in case you can’t scroll) and I’m also gonna make comments on it cus ya know, these vids are only a minute long and thirty fucking megabytes like Jesus Christ.

So without further ado-do!

Should I have added music? Probably??? Ehhh the deathly silence can comfort you. (Wow what a mood.)

The Run Down:

Is rundown one word or two??

When colouring, I break it up into three main steps: base, line and “Hiding All My Fuck Ups”

(First) Base

I’ve never made it to first base... or any base

When colouring, use a non translucent brush to colour in everything. As in, so it’s completely solid??? Where’s my English today?

For every different colour, put it on another layer! I tend to do the skin colour first. You can go over lines that will be covered with another colour... did that make sense?

That’s it, I just felt the need to have three steps at least.

Line

As in... line art.

What I do is I lock my layer — that means when I try to add colour, colour will only be applied to the area that’s been drawn on.

I usually colour pick the colour I used for the base, and the line looks very pale when done (I do this with a non translucent brush too)

I then adjust the layer with lineart so the colour looks darker and more saturated. For my program (Medibang) I go Filter > Hue > Max out the saturation and lower the brightness > save. Sometimes I may do it again if it’s not dark enough.

If you can’t edit the colour then there’s another way! Duplicate your lineart > select the layer on top > change blending/ layer type to “Multiply” (it multiples the colour... duh)

If THAT doesn’t work I have one last suggestion before I sadly admit idk — duplicate line art > select top layer > colour the entire think a dark colour or black > lower the opacity

Line art done! (This time I wanted six steps — 6 is my fav number)

“Hiding All My Fuck Ups”

I rely on this too much okay?

I can actually further split this into two; shading and “I’m Kidding Myself” — let’s begin!

Shading

To shade, I work from bottom layer up!

What you’re gonna do, is select your bottom colour, (or any really but ORDER HELPS) and lock the layer.

Why? That way it’s easier to colour without going over the lines! (Your building on the foundation you set essentially)

With a semi translucent brush (FYI, translucent brushes are thinks like “blur” or “smudge” that purely affect what’s there and do not add anything) I use the watercolour brush set at 15-20% opacity.

I’ll eyedrop the base colour that I’m shading, and with the colour wheel, tru and find a darker version of that. NOTE: when looking for a darker colour, I don’t go to the black, I try and find a more saturated colour OR a darker HUE — black is a curse, I don’t ever use pure black or pure white — give your work the colour it deserves UwU

With the watercolour brush, I literally run the darker colour over all lines that indicate a shade (imagine a light somewhere and what that light touches is what you mainly focus on)

For clothes, I follow the creases I’ve drawn

For hair, I tru to imagine the hair in three main shapes and run the colour over the perimeters of those

Then it’s time to blend! I usually just eye drop the base colour again for this, and trace (lightly, our tablets have pressure sensitivity — same going for steps 1-8) the line that divides the light from the dark, adding a middle ground since the watercolour brush is only semi transparent.

For adding blush to skin: create new layer above skin layer > set to multiply, again, if you can’t do this then you follow same steps as before with line art) > using an Airbrush like brush (soft, no sharp edges, kind blurred), colour the skin areas that need blush.

Skin areas that need blush; areas with LOTS of blood vessels (head... the OTHER head...) areas with thinner skin (elbows, knuckles, knees)

If your skin layer was on the bottom, your blush will only appear on top of the skin and not the other layers!

Just be careful about the areas outside the drawing — you may need to do some tiny erasing

Finally, merge all the colours together. Sometimes different layer types don’t like to merge together without screwing up your other layers, to avoid simply merge them one at a time from bottom up.

As in, second last one and last one merged together, then the one above that merged with the last one — merge everything with the last one... AM I MAKING SENSE?!

I’ll usually merge the lineart with the colour too — I just didn’t here for some reason

“I’m Kidding Myself”

Here we add stuff that hides flaws and merges the character with a background if you have one!

I use three types of layers for this, if your program doesn’t use these then see if they have similar functioning ones (I’m always experimenting so this isn’t set in stone) if your program has nothing then... this will be a little harder, you’re gonna have to do this by hand somehow.

I use these kinds of blending layers; Multiply, Overlay and Add

First I prevent getting the colour on anything BUT the character; magic wand tool > select the empty space > hold ctrl/shift and keep tapping to add or remove areas > invert if you need in order for the art piece to be selected

You can see this when my background when blue, I’m basically highlighting my art of Yuri

Colour this entire space on a new layer. The colour I use doesn’t change here on out (except in the video I do cus I lose the colour but that’s aside the point). When choosing a colour, consider the colour of light — I use human colours??? Colours you find on a person essentially.

As a general rule of thumb; for every new thing, new layer, it gets a little harder here. I also use a semi translucent (watercolour) brush again for everything!

Now we have a silhouette of Yuri — I set this to multiply, it’s essentially like a highlighter marker pen but darker?? This is so that I may adjust the entire colour to fit the lighting colour

New layer (NL), I set to Overlay. Overlay is like multiply except bright! Remember what I did when shading? Yep, rinse and repeat! Afterwards, adjust the layer’s opacity setting so that it fits better with the image.

I’ll also make the brush really tiny and go over hey areas to highlight such as the edge of the nose, chin and jaw — I’ll also add shine to the eyes.

NL, set to Add. I only ever use this layer if I want to achieve “blinding lights” sort of looks. So when the lighting is immense, I have a white background, or the background is incredibly bright.

I use add layer scarcely, to blemish any lines and make it look more refined. I’ll also adjust opacity if need be.

NL, I’ll use the airbrush set too REALLY BIG (1000 usually) and if I have a background, will try and add light to it by making this layer multiply too. I’ll add darkness in the side or corner of the background etc.

NL do the same thing with Add except also make a point for where the light is coming from.

NL, I’ll use a mix of Add and Overlay to add sparkles, fragments, light spots etc depending on image type of need be

Using a Fluffy pastel brush (it’s textured) I also use pure white. This is the only time I ever do.

I’ll add reflection to eyes, jaw and nose. For hair, I’ll pick out a few strands of hair where it’s darker and throw in some loose lines. Clothes are rarely outlined and only where light touch. I use this limitedly.

Ctrl + D ;) to deselect the lasso tool — I don’t usually merge the layers after this because it’s usually too messy and I’m done anyway so I save it, however you CAN put them all in a FOLDER if need be. (I have a few in my vid, the entire thing is in a folder tbh)

Voila! That’s it!

I hope this has been of some help or use! And that this makes SOME sense... I’m absolute shit at explaining everything...

This was incredibly fun to do tho and I spent two hours typing this all! Wow!

Okay thanks for reading! (Hope this helped Melitooooooo, don’t forget the wedding cake ~ v/ important part of marriage you know)

[rayonfrozenwings]

Hey mutuals, followers and p0rn bots, 

Its my blogs 3rd birthday! 

I’ve been lurking, posting, ranting in the SJM fandom on tumblr for three years and that’s kinda Crazy to me. 

So here are some fun Facts that kinda evolve into an appreciation post… and then an anecdotal history of this fandom I’ve been a part of. So thanks for hanging round and talking shit with me. :D

if ur tagged it’s just like a thanks or when I met you - lol you don’t have to read the whole thing... 

and the rest is under the cut.... 

I only liked posts for the First month, I never reblogged. It was my first time on tumblr.

I’ve had the same URL since the start

The first post I reblogged and commented on was @miladyaelin ‘s post about a Volcano in the Frozen Wastes - such a wasted opportunity for World destruction that was not used to full potential at all in KoA hahaha - maybe a spin off series? joke.

The first person to reply to one of my asks was abookandacoffee or @bookofmirth 3 months after I joined tumblr and that’s kinda scary because that means we have been speaking longer than we realised. 

@propshophannah​ thanks for letting me go nuts about theory with you!

The Big blogs in the SJM fandom change, and it's cool that being in the fandom for so long means that I get to talk with all these people and make some real friends.

I made read friends from reading books and talking about them - How Cool Is That!

I had fun making shit posts about Dorian’s couch, Rowan’s relationship status after EoS and seeing my friends come up with some pretty clever memes too. 

The Art is amazing, and actually getting to talk to artists about their art is something I didn't think would happen ever. So I’m so grateful to tumblr for that.

I want to tag a lot of people but - having been here so long means that urls change and I lose touch - plus I think I would go over the “50 tag limit” easily. 

The first kiwi blog who I talked to was @verifiefangirl and we bonded over the Old El Paso advert of “why not both”. 

I want to thank those who encouraged me to write my theories, and I did that for the first year on here. 

I want to say thank you to the people who told me “You know, you can write your theories as fic and people don't get as angry.” Because you were right! And so that started my writing of fan fic, and thank you to those people who wanted to be tagged and let me know what was up - sorry I haven’t written in a while. 

Thank You to @faenet and my Faenet Fam. I joined to share theories, switched it up to write fic, and then evolved into Edits. I was able to learn how discord works and be a part of a team and learn new photo editing skills - I knew nothing before I joined and it's so cool to have become a part of that community.

Thanks to my BookClub brotp - It’s been the best getting to know you all over the last year, discuss books and life. And just have fun. I honestly wouldn't have connected with you guys if we just relied on tumblr because it often requires me to say something first, and i'm not good at that. @theyretheirthere​ sorry I had to tag you twinnie. :P 

Some Fandom History for those who have been here a while ... (well for as long as I have been in the fandom, I know there was a time before this).

Phase One - POST EOS Theory and Beach Scene Debate, Elorcan exists now even tho People still HATE Lorcan (not me but lots of people did). ACOMAF love, nickname of Tam the tampon takes off. 

Phase Two - PRE ACOWAR, Moreil Hype, Fandom super excited, Acomaf love, Rhysand love.

Phase Three - ACOWAR IS AWFUL - Dumpsters on Fire, lots of fandom people left. The ones who stayed had discourse about Moriel, Mor’s sexuality, Nessian, the ending and how it was rushed, Azriel is a smol cinnamon roll who deserved better - lots of Az fics and the birth of Elriel started here. 

Phase Four - TOG FANDOM ARE MAD because Chaol’s novella turned into a Novel. Cyber bullying of Chaol lovers in fandom led to a lot of blogs leaving - just be kind to one another, you can talk about stuff without personal attacks.   

Phase Five - WE ARE ALL GOING STIR CRAZY, Someone released a TOD mock cover and there was a lot of ableist stuff going on. Bad time in fandom. 

Phase six - TOD Came out - Lots of people refused to read, other people felt vindicated about theories, other people were shocked about Maeve. Praise and Hate towards the book and for how SJM handled race and disability. Was she being sensitive or appropriating? Mixed Reviews, again fandom got a little smaller. Acotar Fandom was taking off in terms of fics. 

Phase Seven - Acotar Fandom PRE ACOFAS Fan Fic Mania. Most of us re-read acotar, acomaf, acowar and Fix-it fics, Nessian Fics, Feysand Fics, Lots of Fics. Lots of Art. I noticed the ACOTAR fandom kinda took off while the TOG one floundered.

Phase Eight - A New Novella for ACOTAR, ACOFAS - lots of hype. Lots of mixed reviews - “it had no plot” or “I love it” or “I don't like how the first pov changed depending on the character” or “Yay christmas!!!” or “boo wall scene” or “yay Wall scene!!” Again - more fics and art came from it. Snowball fight was a highlight, art was gorgeous, Amren as a snowball was also good. Fandom was flourishing again, yes we lost some people but we also had a resurgence in creative content.

Weird non-phase - Catwoman: Soul Stealer, was released but wasn't a “must read” for many people.

Phase Nine - Pre KoA, Fandom was Hyped! We were all doing our re-reads, theories came out again, discussions about favourite quotes of things we had forgotten were shared. Again - Some good ToG fic came out because people had it fresh in their minds again  - we were preparing. Edits were great, lots of Edits, Lots of Art. 

Phase Ten - KoA Came out and destroyed us. Fandom was relatively quiet while people abandoned tumblr to read it. Anti’s came out in force, they had more to say about it that the fans did. Fans didn't see this immediately because they weren't on tumblr. About a month after release, We got Meta and discourse on KoA and what it means and what Aelin’s story has meant to us personally. Edits started taking off again. This Phase is still ongoing even a year later. Personally I am in Awe of that book and what it managed to achieve, I wanted to re-read it straight away but it still has so many parts that HURT to read. 

New people slowly trickle into fandom, or pick up the books, its sweet, but as a veteran sometimes seeing the same arguments gets tiring and so I dont comment as much as I used to. I’m still here reading, but I don't really want to write another essay like the ones I've previously written to defend a point so i’m quiet. 

Where I think it will go next? 

Most of the people who remain in the fandom are good at looking at things with a critical eye but saying “I can still enjoy a book”, which I like. 

We will get hyped as a fandom for Crescent City which was pushed back to March 2020, even if we are unsure it’s what we want, I don't think we can help ourselves. 

ACOTAR 4 is in the works with no confirmed release date, just vague mention that it was being pushed back - twas supposed to be 2020 but I'm doubtful, especially if other titles are pushed back first like CC:HOEAB - it was by three months from Jan to March. 

WOTOG was also pushed back, first from release with EoS, then from release with ToD and now from release with KoA (those are all goodreads dates as I was waiting for it and keeping an eye out, but we also had novels added and other books like acofas - goodreads also isn't the best at staying on top of release dates)…. we have had mention of it that it will include art and is co-authored by Lynette Noni, so It is still being made at least - I mean I don't have to cry about it being cancelled just yet. And So I have to stay around for those. I became invested in the World building of TOG to not wait for WOTOG. 

So yeah, it’s been a wild 3 years. <3

[harrysdimples]

sooo...it’s the legend @btapants’ birthday and me and my main partner in crime daria @britneytshirt both came up with this idea and whipped up a lil somethin somethin for celine to read! we just want you to know how loved you are celine and how you influence us all to be better people! we all love you and had a few things to say :)

@bidonnas (aka mik):  i followed celine like ages ago bc i was looking for more harries to follow and she seemed so sweet and, like, a Quality™ blog and we've been mutuals for ages as well and we like sent each other asks for like ask games and tagged each other in tag games but we didn't start talking more until the first gc in like march of this year and i do not regret a single thing of entering that gc bc i got to meet my birlfriend, now my bife. we've just gotten closer over the past 6 months of being in so many different groupchats with each other and i love everything about her. she's funny, she's kind and sweet, and she loves mamma mia. i mean, who could ask for more?? fjdkgksdljkfg celine deserves the whole world and all the love in the world and i love her so so so much!!!!

@guccifloralsuits (aka violet):  Celine, you already know it but literally love you tons, you make my experience as a harrie stan so much brighter :) I'll always remember the #funkirk days and times we've been throught - from the discourse days to the crazy concerts & I can't wait to see what this next year for you & us brings! You're so easy to talk to and fun to share this experience with! HAPPY BIRTHDAY ALL MY LOVE TO YOU 💖

@annaonvinyl (aka essie): Celine, Celine... I believe we've been mutuals not for that long and i do remember checking my notifications and seeing that she followed me i kid you not when i say i nearly had a moment because i would constantly see her posts and people talking so nicely about her. i can now understand why people kept saying sweet things about Celine, i mean she's amazing! if you aren't following her please do me a favour, go to her blog and press that follow, just... do it. celine is so sweet and funny, her blog is the perfect mix of aesthetic and relatable and not to mention she's so freaking stunning? i mean... have you seen her? model material, i'm telling you. so in conclusion what i want to say is celine is gorgeous and so nice and i love her! tanti auguri bella! spero che tu abbia un bel anno davanti a te e tutto il meglio vada per te! goditi la giornata e sorridi molto (scusa il mio italiano arrugginito)

@signofthebis (aka petra): Happy birthday, Celine! ❤❤❤ You know why I followed you. Because of the tags you wrote under my bta pants gifset. And I knew in that moment... this is a person that gets it and I need her in my life. And then I was lucky enough to get into the biconic gc you started and I got to get to know you and wow? You're amazing. You're so funny and incredible and just... I stan forever??? You're truly a queen. ❤❤❤❤ One day your selfies are gonna kill me because you're that gorgeous. And honestly? What a way to go. So Celine, I hope you're having a wonderful day and may your life be filled with only the best of luck, may it be full of love and kindness because that's what you're giving to us and you deserve the same it in return. Ily ❤

@flowerfeasts (aka dani): I followed celine like a year ago because i used to see all my faves tagging her on my dash, so i thought she was very important and cool and i remember waiting like a few weeks to follow her cause i somehow thought that would increase the chances of her following me back? lmao anyway, i still think she is very cool and i LOVE her fashion sense and she is a libra! that means she is awesome

@harryandcats (aka lejla): CELINE MY ANGELBOO!!!! I’m sooo bad with words and tbh?? there’s not enough words to describe how much u mean to me anyway smh you’re one of the sweetest, funniest and smartest (let’s just not mention your posts and the things you say something BDJDNDNDB) and loveliest people I know!! you’re also so silly sometimes but in a very cute and endearing way bdndn I could talk to you about literally anything, be it something deep or something random like poptarts bxjdndn speaking of poptarts we truly gotta meet someday and you’ll have to buy me lots of things and in return you’ll get the biggest hug of your life!!!! sounds like a plan if you ask me anYWAY I lov u with my whole heart, you’re my love, my life, my wife, my gf, my bitch, my boo, but most importantly: my dumbass ✌🏻😔 I hope you have the loveliest day!!!! Happy Birthday, Celine!! 💗🌈💕

@harrysnotechanges (aka kristyna):  Celine 💕💕 you are so funny and such a kind and generous person (not to mention gorgeous, ugh it’s not fair). I’m pretty sure I first started following you because of your url (I mean how much more iconic could you get,,, and I couldn’t agree more, the bta pants were the best pants Harry has ever worn tbh) and I stayed because you’re just an amazing human being. Ily 💕💕💕 Happy birthday!

@gettingdizzy (aka sav): I LOVE CELINE she is super kind and funny and like a little sister to me!! talking to her always makes my day better :) im not even sure why i started following her we probably got put in a gc together or something but im so glad i did!! HAPPY BIRTHDAY ILY

@nofoookingway (aka jess): Oh boy, lil Celine. The cutest bean I’ve ever seen. I know we don’t speak anymore bc I’m trash and got too overdramatic about a stupid lil thing, but I’m so glad that we still follow each other and I see you on my dash every day. Your posts never go without a typo, even if it’s just the tags, and that’s probably my favorite thing about you. You’re so expressive and so weird in the best of ways. I’m pretty sure you’re starting uni (if you’re not smack me), but I know you’re going to kill it. It’s hard af, and it’s gonna suck. You’re gonna hate it sometimes, but believe me when I say I know you can do it and that you will have a blast once you find your niche. If I can do it, you sure as hell can. I wholeheartedly believe that. Anyways, I hope your birthday is just as fun and amazing as you are. ilysm 💛💛

@leesh (aka leesh lol): HAPPY BIRTHDAY CELINE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i hope u have the absolute best birthday ever bc it’s what she deserves and i hope harry makes an appearance again looking absolutely fabulous bc it’s also what she deserves (maybe wearing the bta pants? yes i’m putting it into existence!!!!). i honestly can’t rmbr how or why i started following you, maybe it was a gc or maybe i just liked ur blog, i have a terrible memory, but i am SO GLAD whatever the reason I DID. i love seeing ur posts on my dash and i love seeing what you’ve got to say and i also love talking to u in gc’s and stuff. ur a cool gal and i’m glad we had a chance to become mutuals and pals. again i hope u have the best way day ever and get spoilt rotten. i love u!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 💖✨

@kiwiintro (aka kayla):  Happy Birthday Celine Bean! I hope it's amazing I love u and you're so iconic and amazing and ur an actual Meme™️ sometimes anyways again I hope your birthday is amazing and have fun being 1(one) year older ❤

@harryftvans (aka teresa): celine my dearest witch princess and gentle air spirit happiest of birthday wishes to you!!! someone’s getting old lol anyway I wish u all the best and hope you have a great day and that a lot of other great days will follow because u only deserve happiness and love and ~good vibes~ in your life!! stay ur amazing self, you’re always so chill and laid back (which is nice in this hectic world gksndn) and even when you pull a zayn on us at the end of the day you’re always there for us, being supportive and it’s always a delight to talk to you and hear stories from you!!! great britain is blessed to have you for the next couple of months/years (hope u have a nice time at uni I believe in u) so yea enjoy your day hope it’s filled with lots of love and hugs!! i’m glad you’ve been brought into the world and i’m glad we were out in the same group chat I couldn’t imagine my days without u, love you v much💕

@pinkflaredpants (aka iris): No offence but it's been a whole ass year since we first heard medicine and still no fuckin studio version of sott.

@britneytshirt (aka daria): celine, remember the day we became mutuals? it’s definitely been a year(+) now, can you believe it’s been that long? i followed u not really expecting to be followed back and u followed me about .02 seconds later and honestly i was a lil shocked. so i put my insecurities aside and decided to text u and u said u just saw my url and liked it and followed me. like?! *harry voice* craziness right? anyway, i like to think of u as a little present from life. when we started talking i was very lonely and literally cried myself to sleep every other night and having a friend, you, to talk to made me realise nothing is ever that bad and in a way... gave me hope? you mean so much to me. you’re always fun to talk to, u always have the funniest things to say. and most importantly, i know i can always count on u for whatever, you’ll be there to listen to me. so thank u. i’m so grateful i have a celine in my life. i love u

me (aka moi): so....celine, where do I even start? from those very first few months when I joined this fandom in september last year we were close friends. we started our first conversation about old 1d memes and the rest is history. I don’t think there’s been a time in the last year or so where I haven’t spoken to you, and I really couldn’t imagine my life without you in it. I look forward every day to chatting with you in the gc and i’m always just in awe of how accepting, loving, caring and truly inspiring you are as a person. I love hearing you speak italian in the rare voice messages you send, and especially your selfies (I will hold the belief that you should be a model to the grave I think tbh). you inspired me to love myself for who i am and we’ve grown as friends into something I never thought i’d reach. i’m never going to be able to fully articulate the weight you hold in my life or the impact you’ve had on me, and i’m bad at expressing my feelings anyway, but I just wanted you to know how LOVED you are, by me, and from everyone here. I can’t wait to eventually meet you once you’re settled over here and I can’t wait for the memories and shows we’ll make in the future. thank you for being you, and please never stop being your amazing self 💕

[exhaustedwerewolf]

Also ⭐️ cos I love hearing u talk n rant about ur writing 💕

-twice! twice?! thank you

I’m cheating, this isn’t a section I’m going to talk about corresponding shapes as a whole because I ruminated on it a lot both while and after writing it.

First of all, corresponding shapes is based on a soulmate au concept by @an-island-of-bunnies; please check him out, he’s very talented, and this fic wouldn’t exist without him at all.

Trying to get this AU to mesh with the DA setting was really fun! Thinking about how the etiquette of a world like that and how these creatures would affect social status and even just thinking patterns- I drew a fair bit of inspiration from His Dark Materials. I ended up naming the creatures sal’dunathe instead of soul pets, which is literally just elven for “soul animals.” (sal’i’tel being “without soul,” for when Dorian thinks that Lucan doesn’t have a soulmate.) If I was writing this fic again, I wouldn’t use the elven this time, since in light of reading The Masked Empire and playing Origins, it doesn’t seem logical that humans wouldn’t have their own word- I didn’t even really want to do it at the time, but I was mid-exams and really just wanted to post this fic (although I stand by the fact that it sounds cool.) I was hesitant about the story being that the animals wandered out of the Fade for similar reasons; on the one hand, it was a sort of coherent with the idea of demons and spirits doing the same, but on the other, if it had been proven that these animals came from the Fade, would people have a different opinion of the Fade (and therefore of magic and spirits in general?) I tried to leave it ambiguous as a result of those worries. Since I made the animals sort-of-a-Fade-thing, I was very annoyed to realise that dwarves shouldn’t have them. I was looking forward to coming up with an animal to represent Bianca so much! Truly, I played myself.

Another way I played myself is by picking Cass and Solas for the second scene out of nostalgia for my playthrough. Since this is a Dorian/Inquisitor fic, I had no idea what animal should represent their potential soulmates. I picked a leopard for Cass because I thought they suited her more than I was visualizing a potential romantic or platonic partner. I considered indulging in one of my own ships; maybe an animal to represent Josephine, but I didn’t want to drive away anyone based on who they shipped Cass with, so I chickened out. As for Solas, I decided that as Dirthamen his sal’dunathe would, (at least in this timeline where he does not fall for an elven Inquisitor,) be only an illusion to prevent others from getting suspicious of him. So of course, it had to be a wolf for the dread wolf! 

This actually made me pretty nervous about Romulus being a half-wolf, though, which is part of the reason he’s referred to as a dog up until the penultimate scene, haha. The simple act of linking an oc to wolves, especially in a world where wolves are canonically significant made me sure people would drop the fic, and I thought about making Romulus just-a-dog more than once, but a wolfdog represents Lucan so much better so I followed my heart (and my nine year old self’s pleas.) Dorian as a milk snake on the other hand I never doubted for a second- he’s always associated with serpentine imagery, and with Cole’s line for him- “"bright, like the fish that kill you … can’t hate you for hiding if you burn so brilliantly,” it just made complete sense to me; a creature that screams out that it’s poisonous to defend itself when it’s in fact harmless. (I have a lot of emotions about Dorian if you couldn’t tell.) 

I was also deeply nervous about Lucan in general, since I usually don’t mix OCs with fic. I’d written him before, in a lot of WIPs as well as one other published fic, but he only appeared in that very briefly. I still get butterflies when I think about how I wrote him in corresponding shapes, although I can’t bring myself to regret it. I was in a pretty rough place emotionally when I played Inquisition for the first time, and Lucan got a lot of that pain. Incorporating stuff like his intrusive thoughts and his disordered speech was… kind of scary. People complain  often about OCs being too angsty or being prone to stammering, so I was worried about how to incorporate his issues in a way that wouldn’t just drive people away. Honestly, I don’t think I was successful- but when all is said and done, I don’t think I mind? I have some WIPs that get more into the details of his character, and I think that alongside those, he’d be more coherent to readers in this fic, but I really don’t know what I could have done to “explain him,” in a fic this short. There’s so much to him, hopefully I’ll get to it someday. 

Honestly, there’s far more I could say about this fic so here’s some quickfire facts so I’m not here all night and go to b e d:

- I only made “A snake?!” the opening line because of an inside joke I have with @squire11

- I re-watched all of Felix’s scenes and still feel like I wrote him disastrously! 

- Veles is a Slavic God of the underworld as well as snakes so I chose the name as a nod to Dorian’s necromancy 

- Romulus I picked because of the whole Tevinter = Rome thing

- Animals are hard to write, especially when they’re magically linked to the souls of their owner

Thank you @edelwoodsouls for inviting me to rant about my fics twice, you’re such an enabler and I appreciate it deeply! 

director’s cut ask game

[briteboy]

okay i’m gonna be real with you. i have...a LOT...of messages. going as far back as like...january? probably? i know...i’m so bad...don’t crucify me. i tried to get through all of them but there were a lot that i didn’t have a worthwhile reply for so i’m sorry if i didn’t answer something you sent :{

so here we have: a lot of nice things, a lot of santisms, reactions to the lou and cillian punchout, a few responses to my portfolio and other stuffs...i wanted to put astrology asks in at the end but it’s...a lot more than i thought it was and it’s 3 am so i’d rather die than answer all of those LMAO sorry. i’ll get to it next time

Anonymous said:

u can delete the snorting cum asks but it will still follow you for eternity

okay so I saw the ask about snorting cum and it reminded me of a time that cum came out of my nose. It was gross but my boyfriend and I laughed it off. idk. I thought it would be a funny thing to share!! i'd understand if you didn't want this on your blog!! (maybe it makes you laugh!!)

wELL. WE’RE OFF TO A GOOD START HERE. i’m screaming at this...i hope nothing EVER comes out of my nose ever in life...i hate this but ur right it did make me laugh

(Winry anon again) Also, did you get her name from FMA Winry Rockbell because if so I love it

hehe...yes...

hornybodies

this is what bartsim calls me and i hate her for it

whats the truth bitch

I DON’T EVEN REMEMBER WHAT THIS IS ABOUT BUT I’M LAUGHIGN

i never realised how much i actually missed santi but now im CRYING AND I WANT HIM BACK IN EVERY SINGLE POST WITH LOU BY HIS SIDE LIVING HAPPILY EVER AFTER PLEASE

I missed santirat's beautiful face there are literal tears rn

me too...i hate that i miss him so much it’s so freaking dumb...i haven’t cried to my own story in a while but i bet i’m gonna once santi’s comeback rolls around. i’m already bracing myself

nvm u can have the lovely rat back, that way my heart wouldn’t be hurting like it is now

honestly yeah that’s fair

Been silently following your blog and though I'm more of a "ghost"(? What does that even mean¿) follower, I can't help but express just how chocked I am to see Santi again OMG. Gutted Lou has had a flashback, she does not deserve this. :'(

hello casper the friendly ghost...i love having santi pop up with surprise flashbacks hehe...ur right though she DOES NOT NEED THIS in her life, but it will get better for her soon do not fret my ghoulish friend

I need more pics of Lou and Santi together I’m not satisfied, thankssss

ELI AND MIYU GETTING SO EXCIted WHEN LOU TOLD THEM SHE LIKES GIRLS MY HEART :’)

HEHEH i love it cause that’s literally how my friends and i act, it was fun to write in a scene :~} i’m glad you liked it :’}}

Yeah when I cut my hair short everyone assumed I liked girls I found it kind of odd, but I didn't care too much. It mostly just made me end up realizing all the shit lgbt people go through, one time a guy literally went up to me and my friend, my bff who no one really knew was a lesbian was terrified because he said "oh dont worry lesbians are hot, but gay guys are just disgusting" it ended up he was talking to me, i just rolled up a piece of paper as tight as I could and smacked him on the head

EWW first of all that guy can take his weird fetishization and homophobia elsewhere thanks...i’m glad you threw a paper ball at him LMAO. but yeah on one hand, coming from ignorant/straight people it’s like “uhhhh why would you assume that about me”, within the lgbt community it’s like...common ground...an inside joke...i guess? so it’s weird. the link between hair, clothes and sexuality is can definitely be harmful in certain circumstances

fiona is my spirit animal and i love her ok thanks for coming to my TED Talk

that was illuminating thank you

i re-read santis story and i s2g i've read it so many times idk, but like its so easy to read i dont mean like emotionally but it flows really well. and like its not too confusing i hate when people make overly convoluted stories in an excuse for being deep its some good shit good job my dude

AKJSDKGKSJD THAT MEANS THE WORLD TO ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i never expected anyone to read it oNCE let alone REPEATEDLY...that really makes me so happy though because it’s definitely something you have to go back and read to catch all the details. ahhhhh thank you so much, i never ever want my story to be too complicated so i’m glad you don’t think it is!!

im crying because your recent post reminds me so much of my relationship with my mom when i was younger... she was always out of a job and sometimes we had to resort to living with other family members, it was all really hard on her and especially with having a kid she had to take care of at the same time. even though these are fictional characters, it’s comforting to know that other people have gone through the same situations i have. i love fiona and lou so much, they’re my heart and soul <3

OMG ;_________; i’m crying i’m so glad it resonates with you...i had a lot of friends growing up who were in similar situations and i think i kinda based lou and fi’s relationship on that, so you’re definitely not alone <33 i’m so glad you love them i love u

basically what I’ve learned from these asks is that Gianni is a perfect god-like human and I want one

he is. one time an anon told me they were like santi but they wanted to be rooney and i was like “i’m both santi and rooney on different days and i want to be gianni.” now u know why

hi, i just wanted to pop in and say that i really, really love your blog and i admire your editing skills SO much, i think you are EXTREMELY talented and i don't think you get told that enough. i've been following you for awhile now and i am in love with ALL of your stories, characters and edits you've put out! you're really an inspiration to me and i hope someday my edits can turn out as good as yours!! i don't have reshade so it's harder for me, but i'm trying to learn!! ok have a good day :-)

OMFG ;-; I DO GET TOLD IT A LOT AND IT STILL SEEMS FAKE...you don’t have to go out of your way to compliment me ;___; but thank you so so so much i’m crying...it makes me so giddy that i might inspire someone like WHAT...i don’t even know what i’m doing half the time i edit so u will definitely be able to catch up to me one day even if you don’t have reshade, i know it. i edited without reshade for like 2 and a half years on this blog so you can do it i promise!! have a good day/night/life i love u

fuck my succ

I'm in need of some giannti in my life

we all need some gianti in our lives

Hey! I just wanted to say that ur an amazing writer. You portray everything so well, it’s insane. I want to be a writer someday and I hope my writing is at least somewhat close to yours. Have an awesome day my dude💕

WOW I’M CRYING...i still have a lot of room to grow and so do you, i hope you are able to become the writer you want to be :’} and thank you so much for the wonderful compliment i’m emo have a great day as well

aver is my queen, confirmed.

avey is everyone’s queen confirmed

oksy but listen, look up the model Charlotte Ray Spencer

i did but i couldn’t find her?? all that came up was ray spencer obituaries in charlotte, SC LMFAO...charlotte spencer is an actress tho it seems, is that...who...? omfg

MAY I JUST OFFER THIS NEW SONG OF THE NEIGHBOURHOOD CALLED VOID BC I HAVE A FEELING SANTI WOULD LOVE IT (it's also meant for my aggressive sadboi oc)

OH I LOVE THIS IT FITS PERFECTLY WITH THE PLAYLIST I’M MAKING FOR THE NEW ERA OF SANTI...THANK YOU I’M TOTALLY ADDING IT

I had a ectopic pregnancy when I was seventeen but I feel like I got off lightly compared to Molly. Your story is so beautiful in so many ways, I think it’s incredible how much character development you’ve managed to pull off honestly I’m amazed. Thank you ❤️

omg ;_______; i don’t even know what to say to this, but it means so much to me i can’t even put it into words. thank you thank you thank you so much, and i’m so sorry you had to go through that as well. molly was an extreme case and i hope no one has to go through what she went through. i’m glad you’re okay now, and thank you so much for reaching out to me and reading my story at all ;-; <3333

just a heads up: the links button on your ccfinds blog goes to the femmefinds url still

oh yeah i know i’m gonna be real with you...i’m too lazy to fix it lmAO

Luv your stick n poke tats u posted!!! Could u do more? Maybe on diff places on the bod?? Ur so talented. Xx

omg that was FOREVER ago...maaaaaybe in the future...we shall see...but thank you <33

Can u do a family portrait for all ur characters like u did w Lou!!!

oooooh hehe i probably will in the future!!

Kill v maim is one of my favorite songs of all time omg it makes me wanna wear ripped jeans and a leather jacket and cover myself in glitter and smash some windows with a baseball bat MMMMMM

HELL yeah me too...i become a cyber punk alien vampire when i hear that song

maybe do a casting call posted here ? u have many followers and im sure a good chunk live in ur area and would be willing to model ^_^

omg SCARY...i probably could tho tbh that’s a good idea, thank you!

hi sunny, what program do you use to merge your cc and what do you use to detect and remove broken cc that just doesn't work in game anymore? thanks!

i actually haven’t merged on my new laptop yet but i used s4s for merging and there’s the mod conflict detector!!

My game hasn't been working since the first Cats and Dogs patch but I uninstalled and reinstalled and it finally works again 😭

sunny!! would you recommend your computer to play ts4 on? has it good graphics, can handle the highest settings and so? i really need a new computer but i have no idea which one to go for

yes i would recommend it!! i have reshade, ultra settings and like 8 gb of cc.

thanks for answering my ask eee ur story is probably the best ive read on here and yeah. i love how everything connects and everyones just so real. you dont have to post this i just wanted to thank you for being my inspiration and making me smile, laugh, cry, and scream in the middle of the night with your characters.

I LOVE U...it still sounds so fake to me when people say i inspire them, i don’t even know how to respond to all this ;-; just thank you for sparing a glance my way and resonating with my creations. <3 we scream and cry 2gether

I listened to Separator by Radiohead on repeat whilst reading Santi’s story and now that song just reminds me of him and Lou. I’d totally suggest listening to it’s so good! As is your story :3 xxx

oh radiohead that’s good sh*t...i’m listening to it now and i feel the santou vibes...especially when santi’s feeling out of his mind and she’s the only one who can calm him...haha cool..anyways THANK YOU!!!!

how do you make poses for the roof? i'm not sure how i can know if the sims will clip into the roof or float

honestly i just...eyeball it...because all roofs are different and you can’t put them into blender so. i just winged it lmao...i just made a pose that looked like it could’ve been lou climbing out the window, only the rig was still ground level, and then i used alt + 9 to lift the teleporter onto the roof as best as i could. that’s why it probably wouldn’t be a very practical pose to release, because i have no way of making it easy to use 

Lou punched him and I knew it would happen. 😀👌 nice, nice I like Lou whopping ass.

hehe i’m glad you enjoyed it...who knew she had a freaking hook like that

ok a theory... santi went to look for molly's mother and yea

omg tell me cillian sings every other freckle at some point

OMFG well...that song came out in 2013 and the current flashback year is 2008 so. i would personally murder cillian myself if he was still in lou’s life 5 years after this honestly

hey kitty girl! i was wondering if you could answer this teensy lil question i got. im writing a "story" anddd i was trying to figure out how to make some parts not cliche. like i hate reading about whatever and being like girll ive done seen this before so i just needs to know. kisses

i absolutely love how this is worded and the fact that u called me kitty, very cute. anyway...this is pretty broad, perhaps you could clarify what kinda cliches you want to steer clear from? a lot of the time when i know something is gonna be cliche and there’s no avoiding it, i just kinda own up to it and try to subtly point out how cliche it is and somehow that makes it work out better...like being self aware somehow adds another more realistic element to the story that makes it better? idk...anyway dm me if you need help!!

so.... lou can remember more of what happened? this is good! go 2 the police bitch! tell them!!!!!!!

she should!! but the only problem is she doesn’t have proof. so... 🤔

how do you write your stories in a way that everything is organized and you're certain and not confused with everything? i mean, do you have any way for writing that let you develop your stories with not so much difficults? i'm trying to write an story for months but i only have a few of the most important events on my mind, i don't know how to develop another important details, i always feel that everything is confuse or crap

hmmmmm well my mind is very ah convoluted so it’s a wonder any of this comes out even somewhat cohesive? but basically i have a very good memory and utilize google docs a lot hahaha. i���ve gone in depth about my writing process here!

whats a good way when it comes to starting a sims story? i mean like the first post? :/

ummmmmm maybe test the waters a bit and just make a post introducing your character(s) first? or dive right in and get sh*t started. it could go either way tbh

boyish by japanese breakfast is a santixlou bop

oh sh*t!!!!!! i love japanese breakfast!! and i love this thank you!

So is lou like into cillian in a way? Making him kinda be in her type

as of right now (in the flashbacks)? HELL fucking no. but you’re right, she did say those things in the future to santi. so 🤔

Everyone guessing shit stupidly annoys me haha. I'M UNOBSERVANT AND I DON'T WANNA GO BACK AND CHECK SHIT, LET ME LIVE. *Like* if you a ~dum~ reader who doesn't want every bit of foreshadowing called out. lol

i respect this honestly whenever i drop the hottest foreshadowing of 2018 i never expect my inbox to flood like it does but here we are and i am amazed

CILLIAN NEEDS TO FUCKING FIGHT ME (TYPING THIS ON MY COMPUTER BC I SAW HIS DINOSAUR ASS AND CHUCKED MY PHONE OUT THE WINDOW)

i’m screaming...i’m so sorry it’s my fault about your phone but like also i’m poor i can’t pay for that

i'm studying your latest posts because they're beautiful and my hatred for that long necked bitch is intensifying -- what makes me burn even more is that he's still wearing her necklace, can we say let the bitch burn?

burn babey burn

Why don't you use quick tags?

i’m dumb is why

CILLIAN IS SUCH A SHITASS I HATE HIS FACE WHY R U DOING THIS TO ME

BRUHHHHH THE DINOSAUR LOOKIN ASS BOY IS B A C K run

WAIT THE NECKLACE. HE STOLE THE MCFUCKING NECKLACE BROOOOO

What if Fi's blue eyes are from... Cillian..?

wHY did you have to make him cute and fucking cool though? I still hate him but it's harder.

NVM I JUST LOOKED AT THE POST AGAIN HES WEARING HER NECKLACE INHOPE SHE CHOKES HIMS WOTH IT THIS TIME

I SCREAMED AT THIS SERIES OF QUESTIONS OISDFNGJKDSKJN yeah sorry he’s conventionally attractive but unsettlingly so and i feel uneasy when i look at him and plus the fact that he’s literally evil so .

im like, to 90% sure that cillian is in ace joker. so that song might have reminded lou of him...

this was sent right after that scene of lou hearing the song at pippin’s, so

My conspiracy theory is that cillian is Lou's father. Speakimg of which are we gonna get to that soon, I'm dying of curiosity;.;

I’M LAUGHING I THINK U MEANT FIONA’S FATHER AKSJDKJGDSJ but yeah well. You’ll See

what do u resize ur photos to?

whatever 33% of 1920x1080 is i forget. i have a resizing + sharpening action so i just run that

im about to kill those kids if they keep fucking with my baby

THESE BITCHES BULLYING MY BABY LOU? CATCH THESE HANDS

me @ these ugly kids:

Who are the best creators for mens clothing? I struggle so much to find good cc creators with men specifically!

badabing badaboom

I’m not sure if you’ve converted things before but do you know any good sims 3 cc to sims 4 tutorials? Or your followers?

errrrrr i have no idea i’m sorry :x

would you consider making like a photoshop psd file with all the layers in your editing process?

omg...heck no it would be so unhelpful OMFG mostly because my editing is just my own action + shading and highlighting unique to that pic

would you ever do an editing timlapse of your gameplay pics? 💖💖

ahhhhh maybe!! probably in the future!

OMG HEATHERS WAS FILMED AT MY HIGH SCHOOL AND IM JUST HYPED UP SEEING IT BEING MENTIONED ON THIS ACCOUNT!!

OMFG THAT’S RAD...i’ve literally only seen it once tho i’m fake

I'M SHOOK. my friend kinda asked me out and I wanna say yes but my parents won't let me date. I'm 18! I need your advice! -signed 18 and alone anon

um UR 18 BUDDY UR AN ADULT...DATE WHOEVER THE F*CK U WANT HONESTLY

Can you pretty please link some photoshop tutorials you recommend? I really want to make my photos more cinematic and like your's without totally copying you or someone else. All I do right now is sharpen, color balance, and add some noise and then resize. I really need some more ways to get better looking photos such as yours.

ahhhhh the problem is i don’t know of any i’m sorry...lmao this is totally unhelpful :\ i have my own editing tutorial which is outdated but can probably help you out with the basics of lighting effects and shading n stuff?

Heyyy, I saw that you answered a question about making a ps action like your reshade, and I just wanted to say that I would love that! Unfortunately Mac users like me, can’t use reshade unless boot camping Windows onto our computers...☹️ and your reshade is just soooo pretty...

i don’t know if i’ll be able to replicate the reshade effect totally but i could release the action i’ve made for myself? it warms up screenshots but is totally adjustable to your liking for different color tones so in that way it’s kinda similar to the reshade. i’ll seeeeee what i can do...i know the woes of mac users all too well, my friend

i just wanna give lou a big ol cozy hug :o((( pls

pls hug her she needs it.

Do you post on tumblr from your phome or from your computer? Just curious.

mostly from my computer, sometimes i answer messages on my phone while i’m out and you can tell because autocorrect actually makes me use proper capitalization for once in my life

how many hours have you played the sims? for me i have 4,070 hours. haha help

OMFG i think mine is like...900 or something...i can’t tell if that’s too much or too little, but it’s definitely inaccurate

if i could only look at one person's tumblr from now on it would be yours. ur literally the queen of tumblr #shookaf and also i really hope i die before you ever say ur leaving tumblr cause when u do, i will legit die and bury my own grave. i really appreciate u and hope one day i can be on ur level but rn im at level 1.5 while ur up in the millions :D

I’M SCREAMING PLEASE I AM A PLEB.............i cry u flatter me too much ;-; i genuinely hope i never leave this place because it’s been so fun and it’s helped me evolve so much as an artist and a writer, plus i made some of my greatest friends on here. so i hope that day never comes!! but who knows life is wild. anyway i’m sure you’re actually like at level 578 and are just being modest. it’s okay you don’t have to be humble

i think its so cool that you and wanderlust and other simmers use multiple worlds to make your own town and stuff. idk why but thats just so cool to me and i would have never thought of it. love your blog and story <3

omg!!! well i couldn’t resist, i love a bunch of them and can’t limit myself to just one ya know. plus the more i thought about it, the more my gen 2 story kinda centers around these kids from this one town and the town itself is very relevant. so i felt like i had to make my own!! and i’m very excited to get started with that hehe

I just met a guy named Rodrigo Santiago and I sCREAMED HOLY SHIT

Update (tho idk of you got the first one): I just got a text from a classmate named Rodrigo Santiago. I'm sCREECHING

no freaking way. there’s no way i don’t believe...i want proof...

YOU SO FUCKIN PRECIOUS WHEN U SMILE

dont worry about posting this or do idc but i just wanted to say you should write about whatever you want and not care about whether people think you condone it or not. if i (a gay male) were to write about lesbians its not like im saying YOU HAVE TO BE LESBIANS BLAH BLAH BLAH you know what i mean? or if im writing about a robbery doesnt mean im like condoning robbery so like idk you do you boo and keep it coming ;D ilysm btw

OMFG no yeah i get it, i mean i think now especially in this online environment, people are hyper aware of Problematique things and so they’re a little too quick to point fingers without looking deeper than the surface. and whatever it’s fine people are always gonna be like that because people are mostly inherently judgmental, especially when it comes to consuming media. artists/writers face stuff like this all the time because people refuse to look past the surface, hence why works have gotten misconstrued all the time. but yeah i really appreciate this sentiment, thank u i love u

hope this isnt a weird question but what is the image size that u used for your character page?? thnk u 💕

omg it’s 300x300

have u listened to visions of gideon by sufjan stevens i was listening to it while reading ur stories and it made me so :(

oh my boy sufjan aka gianni’s personality claim i love him...and this song is :{ but i love even if it’s from the nasty age gap peach fucking movie

If i was married to Jamie and he treatin’ our daughter like that… oh I swear HES GOT TO GO!

it’s 2 am i’m so tired answering all of these i forgot who jaime was for a sec i was like um why are we talking about GoT anyways good night

how does alpha hair work with reshade? it seems so good in your screenshots and i’ve seen that in others screenshots it looks bad? whats the secret?

well good morning haha jk i never went to sleep anyway here u go

hooow do you make adorable toddlers in ts4?? teach me, gimme some advice please :(((

chubby cheeks! big eyes! small faces! little but plump lips! a good skin! dats all

how did u get ur sim onto the fire escapes?

ze teleporter mod, that’s it

I snickered at the, THE RETURN OF SANTI. Like I imagine it written in red horror lettering and santi just busts down the door and says ho ho ho im back bench, Did U miss me?

honestly i own a calendar and if i knew a definite date u already fucking kNOW it would be up there

ahhh im sorry for asking but im wondering how you find voice claims?? i'm looking for some for my sims, but it's tough to find one that's *right*, you know?? and your voice claims are great!! thank you <3

OMG voice claims are HARD, i literally just like “collect” them over time...i have a list in my phone of voices i like/may use in the future lmao, but try to think of actors or musicians and search interviews/movie or tv scenes with them speaking!!

i don't even read your story but i still follow you because i love your personality, sim style and just your whole entire tumblr

u follow me for ME? UM...what are u doing here...i’m so sorry (i love u...)

do you have a different reshade preset for flashback screenshots and for the present ones?

i do not!! i just edit differently

what happened to the honeycomb?

OMFG it’s still there...but we legit haven’t seen it since girooni’s wedding so um...it’s gonna have to get a makeover. i’m gonna do it when girooni come back home so i can finally show rupi working there like...wow...she deserves to be seen

lou's dad is the biggest asshole and i am waiting for the day that bitch dies

us when he dies

shit theory: caroline goes to find and confront cillian about what he did in teen lou timeline. care ends up forming a crush on cillian and goes back to meet him several more times, but cillian ends up liking lou more which makes caroline jealous. and that's why they don't speak currently, 'cause cillian ruined lou's life in more ways than one.

uM holy fuck that’s all i got to say

pls tell me that Caro killed the dude that choked Lou (or beat his ass)

god i hope so !

how many people do you follow? are you “strict” with who you follow?

i follow 264 people and yeah i’ve gotten a bit stricter with it just cause like...i only want to follow people whose content i truly care about/will actually notice on my dash

would you ever do a sim dump?

probably in the future, it seems like people want more male and female sims from me SO

ramona got some moves tf

the girl is out here bobbing to the chicken dance like nobody’s business

have u seen the end of the fucking world? if u did what are your #thots

UM......................i watched the first episode ‘cause i heard so much about it and um.............................it was so bad OMFG i hated it. way too edgy for me. completely missed the mark. not into it at all. hard pass

CAN LOU PLEASE HAVE A MAN IN HER LIFE WHO IS NOT A COMPLETE TWAT PLEASE

HOPEFULLY ezra will follow through with that and i don’t necessarily mean in a romantic way but like...as her new roommate MAYBE he will be a blessing we can HOPE

I'm not sure if you've been asked this or not, but your poses are so good and I was wondering if you have ever considered making a pose pack? Sorry if this came off as rude! I love your posts!

i will probably in the future!! but first i gotta figure out which ones i’d actually include

okay so this is random but I just wanted to say that I absolutely love your sims stories. Everything is so perfect and I'm forever shook because I can't believe the "sets" you use are actually the game. Your sims are so fleshed out and you are a huge inspiration to me. Anyways sorry if this was weird but I'm like obsessed with ur blog. bYe

AJHSDHJFSD THANK YOU!!!!!!! yes somehow we work miracles into this game can u believe it...ahh but thank you so much, it means everything that i would inspire you in any way...like what...omg

Santi is actually standing outside present Lou’s apartment wondering where the fuck he went wrong

he’s been there for 6 months just on the street standing there please someone let him in .

LOUUUU OH MY GODDD SKKDSNSJDH MY BABY. SO THATS HOW SHE GOT THE SCAR. WOW

there it is fellas. this message is sooooo old i’m so bad

Have you read/heard of The Lunar Chronicles

i have not!! but i’ll jot it down!

I was wondering if you’ve ever had any problems with skins? For me some on the palm side of the hand it’s noticeably darker than what the skin is supposed to be.. like the rest comes out find but the hands are darker.

hmm...that’s weird, i haven’t seen that. i think it probably depends on the skin? or maybe your sim detail settings?

santi my daddy, honeybodies my mommy, lou looking like a cutie when she saw dat tiny puppy. my name is rappin anon, and i just wanted to say, ur are my favorite simblr basically saving my day. rappin anon OUT

o...my god

i love u

i love u...