#ortho just wants his nii-san to make friends as bad at people as he is

[m4nym03]

Idia: *sighs heavily* In order for this to work, we need someone willing to go outside.

Ignihyde: *stares silently at screens in horrified introvert*

Ortho: *professional shit-stirrer pointing at one of the couches* What about Alastor-nii? He goes outside every day! :)

Idia + Ignihyde: *slow turn to stare at the who went to the common room in person* e-extrovert? *fight flight freeze instinct activated*

Alastor: *looks like death warmed over, is laying upside down on a the long lounge, pot of coffee in hand and surrounded by energy drinks*

Ortho: *viscously pleased he'd introduced Alastor and his brother*

Alastor: *notices the floating tablets* have I finally overdosed on extroverts or are there people here?

Ignihyde + Idia: *instant relief* introvert established

Ortho: *proud of himself* Nii-san needs you to talk to some people, Alastor-nii!

Alastor: *internally crying as he poured an energy drink in the mostly full coffee pot and chugged, looking nonchalant* that's nice, email me and I'll do it tomorrow

[tklpilled]

ship in a bottle

with all the time idia spends on his computer, it should come as no surprise that he has plenty of things on there that he’d…rather not be shared. he has folders of (totally legally) downloaded animes, his collection both impressive and highly embarrassing. he even has them nicely organised, into categories like “super underrated, binge when sad. or when happy”, and “terrible ending, can’t have shit in twisted wonderland”. he’s had to tinker with the storage a few times to make it all fit while still running smoothly.

then, of course, his games, dating sims and gachas and horror on occasion. he’s played just about every game anyone’s ever heard of, and then some.

even so, all of that isn’t even close to the worst on there. plenty of people watch anime and play those types of games, after all, and the fact that he likes them isn’t any kind of secret. he doesn’t have anything bad on there, exactly, just things that he’d rather die a slow and agonising death than let anyone else see.

like that one thing—

“idia-san.” azul’s voice breaks him from his trance. idia snaps his head up, blinking a couple times. the board sits on the table, displaying a half-finished word game. “it’s your turn.”

“o-oh, yeah.” idia scans the board in search of azul’s most recent play. he has some odd letters, but he’ll probably be able to make it work—

he freezes.

of course that’s the word azul put down.

he stares at it for a moment too long, hoping that maybe he’d misread it, but the letters don’t change. six of the tiles, in a neat row. does azul know? no, he can’t. it’s just a coincidence. it has to be.

azul speaks up. “idia-san?” he asks again, tilting his head, expression laced with concern. “are you alright? you seem rather flushed.”

“fine!” idia chokes out, squeakier than he’d like. he grabs some letters from his tile rack, spelling out jukebox using previously placed u and o tiles. he doesn’t think azul believes him; hell, not a person in the world would believe such a blatant lie. still, the topic is dropped and the game continues.

—

“you should tell him, nii-san!” ortho encourages, bouncing on his feet. “you want to, so go for it!��

idia buries his face in his arms, his normally freezing cold room feeling way warmer than usual. “i can't! there's no way he'll ever think i'm cool!”

he regrets even telling ortho about his problem. he should have seen this coming. doesn't ortho get it? azul is basically idia's only friend. sevens, he'd rather confess his stupid crush on azul over this, and he can’t begin to express how badly he doesn’t want to do that. literally anything but this.

“azul ashengrotto-san isn’t the type of person to judge his friends,” says ortho. “plus, his affection levels towards you are higher than usual.”

“th-that’s the problem!” idia squeaks. “being friends with him is already, like, a secret route! if he finds out, it's totally game over for me!”

azul is nice enough, but idia is still nothing short of terrified of what his reaction would be. maybe he'd distance himself, stop coming to club meetings or quit entirely. avoid idia at every chance. tell the whole school what a fucking weirdo the ignihyde housewarden is.

(and yet at the same time, idia can't stop imagining, fantasising about the other possibility. that azul would just laugh, reassure him in his own azul-like way, move closer and closer until his hands are on idia's waist, nimble fingers instantly drawn to all of his most sensitive spots. the mere idea, however unrealistic, fills his stomach with butterflies. he can't think about it too long before he feels likes he's about to explode.)

ortho sighs. “it’s worth considering, at least.”

idia mumbles into his sleeves, “yeah, whatever.”

he’s not going to consider it for a second.

—

idia can't get the conversation out of his head. he can't really tell azul about it, can he? no. no way. out of the question, one hundred percent. possible reaction aside, there’s no way idia would even be able to say it.

azul clears his throat and idia snaps his head up.

“apologies,” he says, straightening his glasses. “there was a bit of a tickle in my throat, you see.”

great. of course that’s the phrasing he uses. idia nods, trying his best to act casual, even though the word makes him so panicky and now he can’t stop thinking about it. the way azul says it, how easily it falls from his mouth. he’s obsessed. he hates it.

there's silence in the empty room as azul moves his piece a few spaces. then, as idia is trying to figure out his next move, azul speaks.

“you're blushing again.”

huh?! well, his face does feel rather warm. his eyes widen and he stammers, pulling his hood over his head to hide the pastel pink tips of his hair. ugh. humiliating.

“um, s-sorry. it’s my turn, right—?”

“tell me,” interrupts azul, tilting his head. idia glances over at him, but doesn’t quite look up. “why do you get so flustered when i mention tickling?”

fuck. fuck fuck fuck fuck.

it’s idia’s own fault, really. he’s the idiot for thinking azul hadn’t noticed. he was just so desperate, hoping that his most well-guarded secret would stay a secret—from the boy he likes, especially. he must have gotten careless at some point.

he realises azul is still watching him. idia coughs weakly, looking anywhere else. “i-i don’t know what you’re talking about! it’s def just some sort of bug, i’m totally fine…!” he’s talking too fast, too high pitched. it’s not a believable excuse at all.

there’s something dancing in azul's eyes; amusement? excitement? “is that so? then, please,” he gestures towards idia, “explain why your face has gone so red.”

“eh?!” idia hides his face with his hands, peeking out between his fingers after a moment. “j-just…drop it, please…”

and, to his disappointment, azul listens.

—

at least, in a way. he doesn’t mention it outright, but every interaction with him from then on is a constant reminder to idia that he knows (some of it, at least), and he’s not above using it against him.

azul begins to bring up the word as casually but as often as he can, and sevens, why are there so many damn phrases that use it? he jabs idia’s side when he spaces out, squeezes his knee under the table, pinches at his waist when he walks past. each touch is brief, and it only leaves idia craving more.

he can’t take it.

“stop teasing me!” he gets the courage to blurt out over a game of chess one day. he can already feel the warmth creeping under his skin.

azul stares for a moment, and in that instant idia has a sudden feeling of impending doom.

and then azul laughs.

he doubles over, pushing the board away from him as he holds a hand over his mouth to muffle the sound. he laughs like idia’s just told him some sort of joke, and idia wants to be annoyed by it, but the sight is just too cute. screw his stupid feelings.

when azul is done laughing, he looks back up at idia. “i'm surprised,” he admits. “i didn't think you'd say anything this soon.”

idia crosses his arms, glaring. his face could easily be on fire and he wouldn't know the difference. he can't say anything. he doesn't know what to say.

azul straightens the frames of his glasses, still smiling. “so, idia-san,” he starts, “what do you want?”

he must be dreaming. idia feels like he’s going to throw up, in some sort of excited way. is this not what he’s been wanting? what he’s been thinking about for ages?

this can't be real.

it takes a while to find his voice. “please,” he whispers. “i want you to t-tickle me.”

and azul…

…stays silent.

idia’s words linger in the air, neither of them moving an inch. idia stares a hole into the table, his hands trembling as he clenches them.

azul isn’t saying anything. he’s not doing anything. shit, he’s never going to want to talk to idia again, he thinks idia is some sort of freak—

idia stands up suddenly, preparing to run, but azul’s hand grabs his wrist before he can move. idia, finally, locks eyes with him.

“okay,” azul says, smiling so genuinely in a way idia has never seen before. “i'll tickle you.”

and idia stops thinking altogether.

azul guides him to the ground, lays him on the floor of the classroom and hovers over him, practically straddling him. their position in the end would surely give anyone who walked in the wrong idea; but then again, maybe that assumption wouldn't be too far off.

“okay?” azul asks once they're settled, tilting his head. he's waiting for idia's go-ahead—as if he would say no.

idia can't find the words in him, so he merely nods.

he flinches almost violently when azul's fingers meet his stomach, both because his hands are cold and he knows what's coming. he gasps in a breath of air, but it doesn't matter. the moment nails begin to drag across his skin, he falls apart. he couldn't keep from laughing if he tried.

“az-azuhul-shi! wait, plehease, please…!” he doesn't even know what he's begging for. he doesn't want it to stop, but he doesn't think he could handle any more.

azul giggles, a light sound that barely carries over the sound of idia's desperation. “please? is this not what you've been waiting for? make up your mind.”

idia can't remember ever laughing this hard. he doesn't even remember the last time he was properly tickled, if it ever happened at all. he didn't know his body could even be this sensitive; it's overwhelming, any attempt at a coherent thought being instantly washed away.

yet at the same time, it's euphoric. he can't deny that he loves this, even as azul manages to find the spots that make him practically scream. it's such a relief that all the classrooms are soundproofed.

“please,” he begs, “dohon’t stohohop!”

[raven-at-the-writing-desk]

Happy Birthday Ortho! Waaah!!!

You look so cool in your Birthday outfit!! You look like a superhero in a movie or story!!

Oh wait I'm kinda getting side trackted here sorry! 💦💦

Here you go! It's my gift to you Ortho. :3

It's an Uno card set, you may not know what this game is but it's like a fun card game you play with your family and friends or anyone basically.

This was a game that I used to play alot with my friends and family back at home, but since there isn't anything like this here in Twisted Wonderland.

I had help from Idia-san to make these and even had them specially made for you, since I heard you sometimes like to play games.

Oh right here, it's called an "Orange Blossom." It was kinda tricky to get this flower but with some help from the others and a lil bit of Hardwork, we managed to get this.

I thought the flower might suited you since "Orange Blossom" was traditionally associated with Good Fortune, which might become useful to bringing you luck whenever you play games with the others.

And it also means Eternal Love, your always so sweet and kind to other people Ortho. And so I thought gifting you this flower would mean you would always have eternal love, to give to other people and to have for yourself.

Happy Birthday Ortho! *Hugs him*

“Do I really look as cool as a superhero?” Ortho clasped his hands together excitedly. “Alright, then I can be Nii-san’s superhero! The next time a ghost ride tries to put a hand on my brother, I’ll spring into action and rescue him!”

“I actually saw a movie like that the other day! The robot hero was all round and squishy, like a marshmallow. It was originally designed to provide healthcare, but then one day it started fighting crime bad guys. Cool, right?”

“Oh, and don’t worry! I understand how to play Uno. I scanned the rules card that came with the deck I received earlier, so I’ve committed them to memory now.” His eyes glittered with fondness. “I can definitely see Nii-san’s influence on the design of these cards! There’s a lot of cute and fluffy mascots here. It’s very moe and kawaii.”

You stared at Ortho, cocking an eyebrow at his vocabulary. 

“Are you surprised?” He chortled into a hand. “I’m always learning, picking up new words and phrases, and expanding my dictionary. It’ll help me communicate better with others.”

You shrugged--you supposed that made sense--and offered a bouquet of orange blossoms to the robot.

Ortho bounced up and down in delight. “Ooh, flower language is another way to communicate--although it’s greatly outdated now. It’s romantic and not realistic at all.”

“Luck can be boiled down to numbers and statistics. The concepts of time and eternity are constructs created by the human condition in an effort to better quantify the world around them. Love is nothing more than chemicals released by the brain... but in the language of flowers, and to humans, all those things mean much more than that.”

“Love...” Ortho closed his eyes. “... it transcends even life and death.”

In that moment, his voice held no feeling. Flat, emotionless, like a dial tone droning in your ear. Ortho had been speaking about the flowers, yes--but a part of you had the sneaking suspicion that he had other things on his mind.

What must he have been thinking then? What must he have been feeling then? You didn’t know, and you weren’t sure if you wanted to. And so, you only did what you knew best.

You embraced him with all of your heart, with all the kindness and love you could muster. The scent of orange blossoms enveloped the two of you.

Ortho fell silent, his head nestled neatly in the crook of your neck. The warmth of electrical generators, the hum of mechanical parts, the weight of his metal limbs... You felt every little bit of his existence within your arms.

An existence that transcended life and death, just as he had said.

[jhoudiey]

Let the Rescue Mission begin!

Finished writing the Yoru crashes the Ghost Marriage story, her and Ortho are going to fuck shit up, no one marries Idia on their watch. What did they blow up? Probably Crowley tbh. Also remind me to never draw Ortho again, 11/10 regrets.

I tried to make it fit along with the regular story as best I could, so I used some of the text from @kibadreams​ translation of it! (Go check out the translations if you haven’t already, and leave a tip if you can :D) All translation text I’ve used I’ve got in italics, final word count is 1900! Full story under the cut.

Crowley gestured grandly at the students gathered around him, “A friend's life is in danger. And I know the wonderfully kind students here will save Shroud-kun……” He wilted with the resounding chorus of no’s he’d received in response.

“What, why? You've gotta help me!” Ortho said, rejected and hurt that no one was willing to help his brother.

Vil sighed and shrugged, looking at Ortho with pity ”He's always avoiding people, and only appears when there's a problem to be solved. You're asking too much.”

”This is your "brother's" problem. Do something about it yourself.” Leona drawled, not willing to help either. 

Ortho sighed, dejected. ”….. I see. Fine, ugh. I'll be okay by myself. Simulating: Idia Shroud recovery pattern. Condition: prioritize speed of rescue operation. …..Simulated operation successful. Now executing actual operation. Now loading dark magic. Target locked: Set on Nightraven College, Main Building. Time until dark magic beam fire: 5 seconds. 4…...3…....2….....”

”STOP THIS AT ONCE------!” Crowley said, shocked that young Ortho would go to such lengths “You actually intend to blow our school, with hundreds of years of tradition, into smithereens? Dark magic beams are forbidden!” He shook his head

”...Well no one was prepared to help, so this is all I could do.” Ortho said, downtrodden that his only solution had been denied.

Yoru dropped from the sky into the students' midst, to a chorus of “what the...?” from everyone who hadn’t met or seen her before. 

“Boooooo, you all suck” she said to the group at large, she looked at Ortho “I’ll help you get Idia back, don’t worry.” 

“Thank you Yoru-san! Together we will save Nii-san!” 

“You could still blow up the school though if you want, might be fun” Yoru laughed, grinning at Crowley

“Hey now…” Crowley started before Leona butted in 

“Who the hell is this, anyway?” he asked, jutting his thumb towards her.

“Ahhh Yoru-san, it seems you were watching the whole thing?” Azul asked, hand on his chin in contemplation “that unique magic of yours does seem to be very handy…”

“Yea. Ortho, maybe you should threaten to destroy his shitty Octopus lounge too and he’d help” Ortho giggled “Anyways, let's get out of here, these useless guys can’t do anything anyway”. She grabbed Ortho under the arms and flew away from the group as quickly as she came. 

“Excuse me, would someone please explain why there is a feral woman with wings on campus?” Vil said, clearly annoyed.

“Ahhh, my apologies” Crowley batted his hand at them “That is my daughter, she is… uhh...spirited, to say the least”

“You look pretty proud though” Leona chuckled, looking at the puffed up and smiling Crowley

“Well you know… fathers and their daughters… anyways, back to the task. We can’t leave it up to my sweet and cute daughter to save Shroud-kun, Operation “guilt trip them is underway!” He said, straightening his jacket

“Did he just say… operation guilt trip?” Ace muttered under his breath

“Ah, here's one now! A Nightraven College student!" Crowley said getting in Ace’s face with a make believe microphone

Ace jumped back from him, confused “Wha- what are you doing all of a sudden?”

Crowley, undeterred, continued to push his fake microphone into his face "I'm a reporter from TBC News! You are a student of Nightraven College, yes?!"

“Whaaat is happening?” Ace asked, looking around at his classmates

***

“K Ortho, how do you want to do this? I saw what happened, but I don’t think I’ll be able to fight a ghost” Yoru sat across from him in the tree she’d flown them to. 

“Well I can blow up the school but…” he paused

“It might be a bit of an overkill” They said together, laughing

“What sort of specs do you have in that body of yours? Anything that can destroy a ghost?”

“No, if I did I’d have saved Nii-san by now” Ortho said sadly

“Well, that’s alright” Yoru replied, patting him on the shoulder “I can see where they are, but we’ll need a distraction to get him out of there...and we’ll need something that we can actually hit them with”

“So we gotta go to Sams Mystery Shop!” Ortho said, excited to start the rescue plan

“Eventually... the idiot party has moved in front of his shop and I’d rather avoid them, I don’t really like being seen around campus” She grimaced

“But what about Nii-san! We need to save him right now!” Ortho stood, indignant that Yoru wasn’t wanting to jump to action immediately.

“Ortho, it’s okay. I’ve got eyes on Idia, and eyes on the shop, we can go once everyone has moved on, they’re planning on helping after all. Dad must have guilted them good” She laughed and stuck her tongue out at Ortho, he was reassured and sat back down in the tree. 

They stayed in the tree, making plans and discussing how to fight ghosts. Eventually Yoru saw through the crows that the last group of students had left the shop, and she signaled to Ortho that it was time to go.

“Ahhh more little devils have come to visit my shop! Anything you need is IN STOCK NOW!” Sam said jovially when they walked through the door

“Hey Sam, we need something to repel ghosts” Yoru said with no preamble or pleasantries 

“Another devil wanting to fight ghosts! Lucky for you, I always make sure to have some extra goodies for my favourite little demon!” He teased her, patting her on the head. She swatted his hand away

“Haha” She said flatly “I don’t want to marry the crappy ghost bride, I want to destroy her for kidnapping my friend” Ortho furiously nodded behind her. 

“Haha what funny little demons you are! Let me know how it goes, I do love hearing stories from the dead” He handed them a small torch and grinned at them. “This will attract the ghosts and they’ll be temporarily frozen in place. Remember to use it, your feet will be of no use to you in this fight” he smiled.  

“Okay Ortho. They’ve moved Idia to the cafeteria, if we go in through one of the windows do you think you can sneak up to him and grab him while I cause a diversion? ”

“Yup! Don’t doubt me when Nii-san is concerned! He’s in danger so I’ll do anything to save him!” 

“You’re a good kid, Ortho. Lets go get your brother back” She grinned and grabbed him in her feet, speeding off towards the great hall. 

The sounds of slaps rung through the hall, Yoru had to suppress her laughter from where she hid in the window with Ortho. This was too good to ruin, Idia could wait a few more moments. The look on Azul’s face was particularly satisfying after his initial refusal to help.  

“We should use the others as a diversion, when they come to attempt to propose to the princess we’ll grab Idia and get out of here” She whispered to him, keeping a close eye on the ghosts. “Shouldn’t be long now…”

“But Yoru, they’re all chanting Kiss! Kiss! Nii-san is going to be taken away to the land of the dead!” Ortho whispered, getting more upset by the minute.

“It’s not quite time yet, Ortho, please believe in me! I’m not going to let anything bad happen to Idia” Yoru reassured him, patting him on the shoulder again. 

There was a ruckus outside the cafeteria, the guards left to protect the princess from the new would be suitors. “It’s time, Ortho, let's go” Yoru said, dropping down to the center of the cafeteria in a flurry of feathers and fury. 

“Ehhh? Fugu-chan you came to fight a ghost?” Floyd laughed, surprised, grinning at the chaos. 

Eliza screeched for her guards, how DARE a commoner attack her! At her own wedding, no less! She stood back as her ghostly consort moved to protect her from Yoru’s furious attacks. 

“I’m not letting you marry Idia you shitty ghost!” she shouted, flying at Eliza

“Ah, it is almost midnight…. Finally, the time to seal our vows with a kiss!.. Get out of my way you terrible bird girl!” Eliza tried to get passed Yoru to where she could reach Idia.

“Heeeeeeeh is Fugu-chan jealous that Hataruika-senpai is going to marry the ghost?” Floyd pouted from where he stood, frozen

“Fufufu, I don’t think Yoru-san is the jealous one here…” Jade muttered with a smile on his face, looking at his brother

“Ah it seems there is at least some entertainment at this wedding” Lilia chuckled, clearly enjoying the drama as it unfolded. 

None of Yoru’s attacks were having any effect, but the ghosts were weary of the torch she still held in her hand, it could cause them problems if they were caught with it... if she actually remembered to use it. Yoru had so far managed to avoid being slapped, but she was losing. The torch provided her some extra leeway, but there were too many ghosts for her to handle without getting caught and slapped like the rest of them. The doors to the cafeteria slammed open, help had arrived.

“HOLD IT RIGHT THERE WITH THE WEDDING—-!!!!”

The ghosts that were occupied with Yoru turned their attention from her and towards Ace, framed in the doorway. She used the distraction to fly towards Idia, where Ortho was slowly dragging him towards the windows. 

“Yoru help! He can’t move and he’s hard to move like this!” Ortho struggled, trying to lift him

“Time for your dramatic manga rescue” Yoru teased Idia as she grabbed his arms in her feet, scooping Ortho under the arms, and flew them out the window. 

“Does she always enter and leave so dramatically?” Cater sighed, secretly wishing he could master the art of a flashy entrance to the same degree. 

“I’m impressed she didn’t get slapped” Lilia pouted, still playing up his injury like it actually hurt.

***

“Yoru! Do you think you can c-carry us both?” Idia stuttered, swaying in the air from where he was hanging from her feet. 

“I don’t need to carry Ortho, he can float down, I’ve just gotta carry you. I only needed to grab him long enough to get out of the school”. She let go of Ortho, who was happy to float along beside them

“EEEEaaaaaaahhhhhh this isn’t the rescue I’d dreamt oooooffffffffff!!” Idia screamed as they flew towards the mirror chamber, him swinging precariously in her talons. Ortho giggled, glad to have his brother back. 

“Okay, make sure to not get kidnapped by any more ghosts” Yoru laughed as they landed in the mirror chamber, in front of the passage back to Ignihyde. 

“I-I didn’t want to b-be kidnapped in the f-first place!” He stuttered, clearly still shaken at the day's events.

“Ahahahahahah, you almost married a ghost! Luckily we came to your rescue like valiant… uhhh… knights? That normally… save the kidnapped princess?” Yoru poked fun at him “I don’t know what happens in the manga you like to read” She laughed as he sputtered and tried to think of something to protest with

“Yea Nii-san! The princess has to kiss the hero that saves them at the end!” Ortho giggled, looking between them

They both paused, awkwardly staring at each other for a few moments

“...No. Absolutely not. Nu-uh. Nope.” They both said shaking their heads, in perfect unison.