#or what her reaction was. but i dont want to have a big fight with the siblings here.

[etherealkissed88]

how i manifest when i feel anxious •°. *࿐

i decide i have what i want…

when i feel anxiety -> i let it pass while knowing its only a human reaction

◦ since i am beyond just a human (i am limitless imagination/self), i know any anxiety is below me and it has nothing to do with my limitless self. i have exactly what i decided i have, regardless of any anxiety.

know anxiety usually comes from a fear of failure

◦ so, i cannot limit myself based on what i see or what i negatively assume my future will look like bc i am always beyond the 3d, no matter what feelings/anxiety my human self experiences.

◦ i become indifferent/i dont care about what i see or what i assume i will see because i know everything comes together in the 3d once i change self/know its done. fact: everything always comes together and works out in the end. being indifferent to the 3d = being indifferent to emotions, anxiety and everything that doesnt serve you.

dont fight it, dont avoid it, tackle it head on

◦ acknowledge you are experiencing anxiety bc you are. yes it can feel like shit but it doesnt have to affect who you are being (whatever version of self you are embodying). again, i can choose to be indifferent to this anxiety. you dont have to be scared of the anxiety. it is a natural human response. cry if you need to, let it all out. dont try to suppress it bc that will only come to bite you back in the ass, believe me.

◦ take care of your mental health in whatever ways necessary. when i used to experience anxiety, i used to take walks in the park, clear my head, meditate, express myself and my emotions through art and journaling, etc. remember nothing you do (or feel) in the 3d has to affect who you are being/your state.

"how can i still have anxiety yet still be a desired version of me?"

anxiety has no affect on anything unless you allow it to change your identity. you are the one with power, the anxiety is only an experience, similar to breathing in oxygen and using our sense of touch; its all neutral. when you start surrendering to the anxiety, you are creating and accepting negative stories that you create based on the feeling of anxiety. allowing that anxious feeling to change your state/identity is surrendering to something you view as more "powerful" than you. stop transforming that anxiety into a state that you embody based on the false, negative stories u imagine.

remember a 3d experience or anxious feelings doesnt have to influence who you are being. an example: a model who knows (fulfilled) that she is graceful and beautiful can have anxiety about doing her catwalk. the anxiety is normal, she can experience the symptoms of anxiety (shortness of breath, dry mouth, shaking) but her core identity/state is still a graceful model. the anxiety is only a temporary feeling. usually when we experience these feelings, they occupy all of our attention in that moment which is why it seems so scary but in reality, its not that big a deal. know that anxiety is just a feeling. you are safe. you can still experience shitty feelings while knowing you are a bad bitch!

you dont always identify with everything you experience. for example, a lot of people experience good things and still identify as people who are unworthy of good things. so its really up to you to choose what to identify with.

i know my only job is knowing its done

◦ if i just decided its done, as the operant power, as i say goes, therefore its done. so my job is done. anxiety is part of the 3d, not my limitless self, imagination. so i can be indifferent and experience it without identifying with it, the same way people manifest what they desire while experiencing their shitty circumstances daily (because they do not identify with those shitty experiences).

◦ ive heard/experienced situations where we know its done yet we cried and felt like shit, and what we wanted still manifested into the 3d. bc anxiety is only a feeling. do not allow your feelings to take hold of your state, but if it does, its never the end of the world... just get back in the state. 3d shit/anxiety doesnt have to intervene with who you are being/what you identify with.

kisses, jani ☆

[mrsparrasblog]

POLY 141 x pregnant Reader

reaction if they are the biological father. if they are not the Dad

Postpartum Depression

Ever thought about what it would be like to be pregnant with this gigantic pile of handsome men? Because I've thought about it, and I can go into heavy detail—I will go into heavy detail!

Price: This man has a heavy breeding kink, and no one can convince me otherwise. He was so happy when he found out you were pregnant that he immediately got into heavy Dad mode. "What do you mean?" he asked after you told him he doesn't need to baby-proof the house when you're only in the second month. He attends baby preparation courses with you and overall turns into a super daddy.

Johnny: The second one with a heavy breeding kink is 100% sure he is the father. "It's the MacTavish genes," he says confidently. "We're going to have at least three bairns by the end of the five-year mark." He wouldn't admit it, but he called his mother crying while he told her the news. The MacTavish Family was special, so they all came with big stroller gifts and the urge to overwhelm you with their love. They don't care who the baby's biological father is; in their hearts, you're a MacTavish, exactly like your sweet little bairn.

Kyle: He is really excited. He already loves the baby and is also 100% sure it's his because you two have the most sex out of all of them. He always fights with Johnny about who the father probably is. Kyle is the one who thinks the most about you. He knows how you struggle with the pregnancy and how it isn't easy for you with all the overwhelming baby daddies around you, so he takes his time to care about you. He compliments you more than ever, and if you have a weird craving, he's already ordered it before you even said a word. He is constantly trying to find a baby-safe option of your favorite food. He doesn't drink coffee anymore so you don't mourn alone. Check-up? He is the first to be there, and when the baby was born and everyone looked at it, he went to you. Not because he loves the baby less—it's his world—but because he was so afraid the whole pregnancy of losing his soulmate, the only thing worth fighting for, the only thing that kept him alive.

Ghost: He never wanted kids—at least he thought he didn't—but it made sense with you. He knew you would be the best mother in the world. So why was he so afraid? He thought about how he could hurt the baby all the time with his pure strength or how he would scare the baby or hurt you. For a blissful second, he thought maybe it would be better if he left so you'd be safe from all the shadows of his past. But he was better than his family. He bought lots of parenting books, went to his psychologist regularly, and attended dad meetings, not daddy meetings—a terrible mistake he made. He even bought you a guard dog for the possibility that you and the baby are alone. To his surprise, but not to yours, he was the most gentle and understanding dad there ever was.

Dont ask me why my brain came up with this weird stuff again but Im already thinking about how they react when they found out who the biological father is lol

[animeshotsh]

Family meeting | Dad!Lucifer x Kid!Reader

Summary: Lucifer wants you to meet Charlie, the only problem? He needs to go to the hotel.

PT2 Of This and a full one shot of this.

Warnings: Off Canon in terms of time | Mentions of past abuse | Cursing | Reader gets loved by everybody | Probably some OOC | SFW | Grammar mistakes |

Lucifer undertood, really, he knew Charlie was too worried about her Hotel to ever leave it alone. He also felt bad about asking her to just come home to meet you, after all he was not a present figure in her life.

"(Y/n) are you ready ?" Lucifer called you who went to him with a cancerberus plush on your hand and a backpack with some toys.

"Im!" You declared showing off your things, and letting out a smile. You were now dressed in the best quality clothes Lucifer could afford, he had to take a moment to snap a pic of you (again).

"Let not keep them waiting then" Lucifer said taking you and supporting you on his hip, his wings out.

"ARE WE GOING TO FLY THERE?" You screamed making the house shake, your hyped self could not be contained.

"Yes, what better way to travel?" Lucifer joked. The first time you two took a fly together Lucifer was distracted and ended up dropping you. His reaction time was fast so he was able to catch you, already making promises to never fly again with you but your laught stopped him, turns out you loved to fly and loved the adrenaline from falling. Lucifer found it strange but decided not to question it.

He later went to the internet to look for more information.

Once you two took fly everything felt at peace (and you two were in hell...). Demons and sinners could see their King, no one dared to mess with him. Some ignored him, others bowed and some even waved at you.

From the Sky, the city seemed beautiful in its own type of way. The fire from fights and the buildings falling apart...big neon adverstiments...

If you were honest you liked hell.

Lucifer felt your self become sleepy making him smile. This would usually happen, something about flying with him relaxed you. Maybe being with the king of hell and on top of that flying around the city made you feel Powerfull and protected, enough to make you dizzy. Closing your eyes you let the feel of the wind caress your skin as Lucifer's wings moved towards the Hotel.

~☆~☆~☆~

Charlie was not nervous, not at all!!

That was a lie. Charlie was so stressed over his dad coming to the hotel and with you no less. When he had called her and asked to meet up she had said she had too much work (and it was true) then after listening to how he wanted her to meet you and how you have been asking about her.

Her heart could not take it so she accepted, saying she would make the hotel the safest place for you.

"Husk, put the alcohol away, OH! And be sure to remove any broken glass" Charlie exclaimed getting the most are you for real look from Husk.

Any sharp object had been locked down, weapons hided away and they even took extra care of things that could fall over you.

"Angel, try to...keep the sex jokes as...."

"As good as a good suck in a alley corner after some Drugs?" Angel asked getting an annoyed look from Vaggie. "Fine, I get it. Im not a monster you know" he responded offended going for a drink only to get some appel juice from Husk.

"Princess rules" he simple said.

Vaggie was behind Charlie as she went on checking everything. This was worse than one Lucifer had first come, this was Lucifer and you. The New kid, the new lil relative of Charlie.

"And- and did we get Alastor to go out?" Charlie asked Vaggie knowing how him and his dad were not at good terms.

"Well..."

"Now my dear, why would you want me away?" Alastor asked appearing besides her. "Its because your dad its coming today? Dont worry the hotel wont suffer any type of damage" he promised bowing "or maybe a bit"

~☆~☆~☆~☆

The sound of the door being opened alerted everyone. Charlie was sweating as she saw her dad entering with a small kid on his arms. Puffy sheep skin and cat hears and tail could be seen but their face was pressed against Lucifer's chest.

"Charlie!! Its so good to see you again" Lucifer exclaimed getting closer. "Sorry, (Y/N) felt asleep when coming here" he explained looking down with a lovely father gaze at the kid.

"Oh...thats...thats fine!! We have made everything kids safe for the time (Y/N) is here" Charlie responded still stressed, however now seeing you in the flesh and not only by photos her dad would send her, her heart softened at your sleepy form.

"Well, not everything..." Lucifer let out a groul seeing the Radio Demon who stood with his usual smile.

"Greetings your majesty, I never expected to be seeing you again so soon, maybe grow a few inches instead of getting kids from the streets on your free time"

"Hahaha, oh at least kids like me" Lucifer responded going towards Alastor.

"Hahaha only because you are their size"

"Hahaha, or because I dont have that broken record voice"

"Hahaha, fuck you"

The small beef between them was enough to wake you up, looking up you first saw Lucifer's face. A very angry look then the look of another Demon, a redish one that looked like a deer.

"...are these your ears or hair?" You asked half sleep getting everyones attention.

~☆~☆~☆~☆

"Oh ignore him, we are here to meet with by daugther!!" Lucifer quickly turned around making you face Charlie. He carefully let you down on the ground and saw how you went to her.

Charlie went to your eye level, her heart beating fast. "Hello! Im Charlie, and welcome to the Hazbin Hotel!!" She cringed at her introduction, laughts from Angel and Husk could be hear at the back.

"Im (Y/N)! Are you my older sister?" You asked moving your head to the side taking her appearence, no doubt she was Lucifer's child, she had a different aura, something cheerful and good, something your insticts told you to reach for.

Charlie's mouth went dry, her eyes having now tears as she remember the story her father told her about you, about how you ended in hell. How unfair it was and how Heaven would not listen.

"Y-yes Im" she responded trying to content her tears then almost getting knocked off when you hugged her. Your soft hair rubbing against her cheeck.

"I always wanted a sister"

Vaggie had to look away to keep her emotions in check. She undertood the malice from heaven and was thankul you had ended in Lucifer's way. Her heart broke a bit seeing your small form hugging her gilfriend.

Heaven its damed she tought to herself.

~☆~☆~☆~☆~

"And this is Angel Dust!" Charlie presented you the spider Demon who was looking down as he was thinking about someone else.

"Hello Kiddo" he ruffled your hair getting a laught from you.

"You have four arms?" You asked looking at Angel who showed them then picked you up

"You bet!! And do you know what form arms can do?"

Everyone was holding their breaths now.

"Lots of ticklets!!" He finally responded tickling you. Your laught and smile resonated in the hotel. Your cat hears moving from side to side as Angel tickled you with a small smile of his own.

~☆~☆~☆~

You pulled Angel around the hotel, telling different tales you have been reading from Lucifer's private collection. Angel just nodded at you, he took note of how your eyes would light up when you were talking about a favorite character or a special part of a story.

It melted his heart.

"I want juice" You suddendly said stopping and making Angel almost fall over you. Luckly he was able to catch his balance.

Juice? Angel thought then smirked looking at a very sober and pissed Husk.

"Here, this one makes the best drinks and im sure he has some juices for you" Angel said taking you towars Husk who was giving Angel a very do not dare look.

"Uhhh, he seems scary" you said softly looking at Husk while Angel seated you carefully.

"Scary? Pff he is just sober" Angel said getting a confused look from you.

"I mean-"

"What would you like kid?" Husk asked keeping his voice with no emotion. He had hear you said he looked scary and honestly, that was funny. By the fact that you had touched Alastor's hair and ears earlier and you got the radio Demon to almost break his cool.

Yeah not scared over the radio Demon but scared of him? You were something.

He passed you a juice with appels. You were quick to forget your fear as you sipped the drink looking at Husk. "I liken your wings"

Husk looked a bit suprised but soon relaxed giving you a easy smile.

"I like your horns...what are you?" He finally asked getting an annoyed look from Angel.

"Well...im not sure?" You responded now feeling shy.

"You are a sinner my Dear!" The voice of Alastor echoed as one of his shadows picked you up keeping you from touching his hair again.

"And who are you?" You asked back macking Alastor glitch, static forming around him but then going away.

"Im Alastor, the Radio Demon! I have a show, maybe you ever listen to it or you prefer these boxes..."

"You mean tvs?" Alastor nodded "I used to watch a bit during mornings but...my father hated when we did it he would scream at me and-" your voice broke making everyone look towards you Lucifer almost going for the Demon's neck.

"Oh you poor thing" Alastor said deep down (very deep) feeling bad. Memories of his own life coming to haunt him. "Then here!" He made a move and a old fashined radio appear "this radio hosts only my shows, and no one will be angry at you because you listen to it" He said smiling at you, his shadow still holding you and playing with your horns as Alastor watched Lucifer for a reaction.

"Uh...thank you Mister" You finally said getting a lick from the shadow itself.

"No problems Dear and if you ever need a New dad you know for who to look" He smirked at Lucifer.

"But Lucifer its my dad..." you responded, radio in your tiny hands "...could you be my uncle?" You asked innocently ignoring who you were talking to, one of the most powerfull Overlords in the circle.

Alastor moved his head his shadow getting you closer to him, he took a moment to examine your soul. So pure and so...so unlike him.

Alastor could be chained to someone, but right now the only one who could hold a leash on him was you.

"Of course Dear" he finally responded taking you from his shadow and to his arms.

"And can I play with your hair?"

"Hahaha, absolutly not"

Lucifer was being hold in the back by Charlie and Vaggie sending daggers to the Demon.

~☆~☆~☆~☆~

[fullsunfilm]

svt hyung line as your bf hcs

im not sure what inspired this but here are some hcs for svt's hyung line being your bf >.<

svt x f!reader, all fluff

wc: ~1.9k

read the maknae line ver

seungcheol

☆ always "accidentally" leaves his clothes at your place (and loves when you wear them or return them and they smell like you)

☆ puts his arm around your waist whenever he can. he loves how you both look in photos with his arm around you

☆ lets you put kkuma's pins in his hair and poses next to her ("arent we cute? we look alike, right?")

☆ takes you out to eat at fancy restaurants just to see you all dressed up. he likes the way everyone in the room turns to stare at you as you walk in. you look gorgeous, and hes so smug about being your boyfriend its almost annoying.

☆ loves matching couple jewelry, especially rings. will always buy them and give them to you saying "look, these are so cute! we can match!!"

☆ buys you literally everything you look at (hes definitely a big gift giver) and wont take them back even if you leave them in a box at his doorstep.

☆ the type to pull up anywhere at any time with just one text from you just so you dont have to drive. even if youre not a passenger princess, youll turn into one while dating him

☆ possessive; definitely demands that your lock screen is a photo of him kissing you to ward off other guys. hes even asked you to start wearing his cologne so that they know youre taken

☆ loves to pout at you until you give in and give him what he wants (usually, a kiss)

☆ you basically cure his insomnia. he always tightens his grip on you when you try to get out of bed in the morning and makes you late to work ("babe, if you leave i won't be able to sleep. just stay for five more minutes..")

jeonghan

☆ loves to tease you and see your reaction, but reads you well and knows when to stop

☆ a bit mean, but in the most endearing way possible. the type of start play fights in front of your friends and suddenly burst out laughing when they get all concerned

☆ lets you hold on to him for as long as you need to, especially in situations where he knows youre uncomfortable

☆ whisks you away from crowded areas to be alone with you and hug you

☆ keeps a candid polaroid of you in his wallet

☆ sets your lock screen as an extreme close-up of his eyes that jumpscares you the next morning

☆ a bit shy about showing affection in front of others, but eventually gets used to it and becomes more bold as time goes on

☆ knows exactly how to press your buttons and does so all the time, only to relieve the tension between the two of you with a boop on the nose or a kiss that makes you laugh

☆ enjoys spending time with you at home more than outside, but does take you on spontaneous shopping sprees when he gets a burst of energy (you leave the mall after an hour of looking around because he's tired)

☆ listens to you and comforts you when youre having problems, but is able to gently tell you when its your fault without making you upset (its a gift!)

joshua

☆ always thinks of you whenever hes out shopping and ends up buying you gifts that remind him of you

☆ loves to surprise you and see your reaction with back hugs and kisses

☆ remembers your dietary preferences/restrictions and puts in extra effort to buy foods that fit them

☆ pulls up with two drinks instead of one without even needing to ask you

☆ hand-makes you something related to his newest hobby (a bracelet, perfume, etc.)

☆ loves to watch you talk about things youre passionate about. he loves the way your eyes light up and (although he cant understand a single thing about your tangent) tries his best to keep up with you

☆ always up for a challenge, specifically ones that end in him receiving kisses ("really? alright, bet.")

☆ loves to play with your hair and helps you style it whenever he can

☆ listens to you when youre upset and just allows you to rant it all out while rubbing your back and holding you close

☆ makes the cheesiest acrostic poems for you and laughs when you cringe at him

jun

☆ loves hearing your laugh (and he'll do anything to keep hearing it)

☆ goes out of his way to do weird things to make you crack a smile and distract you if youre sad/uncomfortable

☆ likes it when you run your hands through his hair. he lays his head on your lap and lets you massage him

☆ takes photos of you whenever you make a weird face in your sleep and looks at them when hes bored (they give him something to smile about when hes away from you)

☆ hugs you from behind and lays his head on your shoulder whenever he needs comfort

☆ up for anything! a late night drive to get the most unhealthy burgers in existence? sure! dressing up in stupidly large mustard and ketchup costumes for halloween? absolutely! waking up at the asscrack of dawn to prank minghao with silly string? hes already on his way!

☆ tries his best to stay up with you for as long as possible, but finds you so comfortable that he ends up falling asleep with his head on your lap

☆ hangs out with your friends and lets you hang out with his, too. definitely the cause of a friend group overlap/merger

☆ gives the worst advice as a joke before he gives you his actual advice just to see your dumbfounded face

☆ gives in to the kitty agenda and lets you jokingly paint whiskers on him with your eyeliner. the selfie he takes afterwards is saved as your lock and home screen.

hoshi

☆ makes you horanghae for a photo and sets it as his home and lock screen

☆ helps you paint your nails on your non-dominant hand, but ends up leaving a mess. he pays for a manicure afterwards to make it up to you

☆ tries to teach you how to dance and is genuinely encouraging. he doesnt laugh or make you feel bad when you make a mistake, instead just helping you through the movements until you can dance a simple routine with him

☆ is always bragging about you to his friends and is super proud of you and all your achievements ("guys.. my girlfriend is literally the smartest, prettiest, most loving person ever.. how did i even manage to pull her?")

☆ always supports you on your endeavors! he makes constant deep-dives into your hobbies and interests so he can enjoy them with you and talk about them with you

☆ is super affectionate when hes drunk (hes been latched on to you and peppering kisses on your face for the past hour and he has no plans of stopping for the rest of the night)

☆ seems to get into the most odd situations that you bail him out of, but hes thankful every time

☆ hes a big hit with your friends and family. they all love him and he prides himself in that

☆ gets way too excited while spending time with you and ends up spilling the drink hes sipping on (he cleans it up while you laugh at him)

☆ takes you with him everywhere he goes. his friends are accustomed to the two of you being a package deal

wonwoo

☆ normally wouldnt go out of his way to do anything, but commits to any silly bit you have in mind with full passion and force (even if it makes him blush like an idiot afterwards)

☆ likes to have you in the room/next to him when he plays video games (the type to say "gg gf buff" after he wins his ranked games)

☆ he silently cares for you; he puts his hand over sharp corners so that you wont get hurt if you bump into them, he walks on the outside of the sidewalk so that you wont get hurt by the cars, he always puts out your work shoes so that you can just slip them on during the morning rush

☆ hes always watching after you and keeping an eye on your surroundings. he wraps his arm around your waist and is extra affectionate when he sees a creep staring at you

☆ the type to let you hog the blanket on cold nights without much pullback. he resorts to cuddling closer to you to stay warm

☆ reassures you that even though he doesnt show it as boldly as others do, he loves you and plans to stay with you forever

☆ goes grocery shopping with you after his afternoon nap. his hair looks like a bird's nest, but he doesnt mind and follows you around the market fondly, making sure to hold your hand as he walks

☆ loves it when you need help getting things off the high shelf. he loves to tease you about it and likes your frustrated expression

☆ he wears his glasses more often because you like them on him

☆ when he wakes up every morning, his arm is numb from you laying on it for the night. still, he doesnt move a muscle until you stir

woozi

☆ even with one of the busiest schedules on earth, he still makes time for you. for the time he cant see you, he leaves you small, thoughtful gifts

☆ he has a small part of his studio decorated and furnished just for you

☆ he always lets you listen in on what hes making, and asks for your opinions. he really takes what you say to heart and even makes the members re-record some parts just so he can see how your suggestion fits in to the song

☆ he takes you to the gym. regardless of whether or not youre actually working out with him, he likes having you there with him to cheer him on. it pushes him and makes him hit a new PB every time!

☆ even though he doesnt show much affection physically, he shows it through his music. he has countless songs saved in his drafts with lyrics about you, about how perfect you are, and about how youre constantly running amok in his mind and heart

☆ writes lots of his solo songs for you, and even records drafts of them, but can never manage to sing them to you without blushing like a madman and having his voice crack from the nerves

☆ he honestly thinks youre the most wonderful person hes ever met. he loves you completely and has no doubts in his mind about his feelings. you complete him.

☆ his apartment, previous cold and empty, is full of life thanks to your decorating skills and the scent of your lingering perfume

☆ he loves it when you wear lipstick and kiss him. when he looks in the mirror, he can see the hues of your pretty red lipstick all over his face and neck

☆ the type to make you look at him by grabbing your chin and turning your head. he likes your flustered reaction and kisses you to help you regain your composure

a/n: this was so fun to write!! maknae line next :3

[somesaintiam]

bro as someone who used to ship milkvan i can literally say that yes the duffers literally DO want you to be sick of milkvans relationship and that becomes clear in s4. i had a bias bc i never thought such a big show would make a queer ship, byler, happen, but here we are. About milkvan again, i remember literally trying to convince myself that they were cute in s3 and 4, and remembering being confused that mike wouldnt go after eleven after she dumped him in s3. In s4, i was pretty much sick of them, but was still rooting for them. With their ily fight in s4 i was like "mike say ily to her please!!" but guess what. he never did. At that point i was done with them. I didnt really think about their relationship for like the rest of the season and the ily monologue was just sad. I dont really remember what my reaction was but I definitely felt bad for will. And something was off about that monologue. It was my first watch and i never thought to look into it more at the time. But if the duffers didnt want you to be sick of milkvan then why do they always have these annoying conflicts that take forever to get solved or never get solved, and during these conflicts, mike and el dont understand eachother?? But guess which people, in conflicts do still understand eachother? lucas and max, hopper and joyce, nancy and johnathan, most likely at this point vickie and robin, and mike and will. Those are the 5 endgame couples, if it wasnt already clear from the end scene of s4. Im so glad i watched a byler analysis video because now i actually know SO much more about not just byler and milkvan, but the show as a whole.

[onyour-right]

My thoughts on the season finale. First off, a big shout out to The Acolyte for making me (someone with literally no former knowledge of star wars and what its about) actually interested in the universe and curious to know more.

My girl Mae. I love her, she did nothing wrong ever. Her sacrificing her memories of her sister in order for Osha to achieve what *she* wants was beautiful and such a 180 moment Also, the fight scene between them? Exquisite. The way she set up Sol? I could have kissed her on the lips for that. I need for her to be happy though :3

Qimir. My best boy. He is so down bad for Osha and its actually hilarious. They're already a married couple your honour, they protect, they bicker, THEY TOUCH (that thumb touch was just so intimate holy fuck; also when they held hands at the end). His fight scenes with Sol? Fucking immaculate. That moment when he took off his helmet to fight? MUAH. Chef's kiss. His reaction to his old Master? :( I wanted to give him a hug.

Osha. My other girl. I love her, she can do no wrong either. I love that we saw her anger, her fighting abilities, also that she forgave and apologised to her sister at the end which was such a poignant and beautiful moment. I'm glad she's giving into her desires. Her and Qimir as a couple are gonna be a force to be reckoned with (did you see what I did there; please clap for me).

Sol. His ending was poetic justice but gosh, I still feel a bit sad over him. The fact he still couldn't say that his actions 16 years ago were wrong and steeped in bias was so f*cking frustrating.

Vernestra. She can choke. Qimir and Osha are gonna come for her ass in season 2, mark my words.

Shoutout to the senator!!! He came and spoke and he is now one of my faves.

My prediction for season 2 (i'm manifesting it): we'll explore Qimir's background and why he was so triggered by seeing that green headed twot. Qimir and Osha are gonna fully be in their lovers era, training, causing mayhem, some kissy kissy too. We could also potentially see our duo trying to save Mae because i dont trust she's safe.

[yourlocalmerchgirl]

Your Person

Bobby Goren X neurodivergent F!reader

Summary: Bobby has spent most if his life feeling like he didn't belong, that it wasn't possible for him to connect with someone the way everyone else does, that is until me meets you, his person.

Warnings: Cannon level violence and language. So much fluff, love and acceptance. mentions of Panic, anxiety and death/dying. Minimal use of Y/N. Very little physical description of reader

Authors note: This is story was a labor of love and my love letter to Bobby Goren and the way Vincent D'Onofrio played him. I've never connected with or seen myself represented in a character the way I do with Bobby Goren. I dont think you need to of seen Law and Order: Criminal Intent to enjoy this story.

The midsummer sun shinned down on Bobby’s face as he walked to the coffee shop. The sun feels similar to warmth that spreads throughout his chest whenever he sees you. The smile you always give him. God that smile. It’s different than the smile you give everyone else around you.

He can’t help but smile thinking about the day you met. How flustered and embarrassed you were when you’d run into him causing his coffee to spill everywhere. How he felt something tug In his chest when your big hazel eyes looked into his when you realized it spilled on him. He wanted to wrap his arms around you and tell you it was ok when it was clear you were prepared to be yelled at.

Bobby knew the moment he started falling for you. He tried to fight it at first because it scared the shit out of him. Pretty much resigning to the fact that he’d always be alone. His job was demanding, which was hard for a lot people to deal with. So he had stopped entraining anything that wasn’t serious. He wanted someone to share a life with, someone that would accept him, quarks and all. So he didn’t want to waste what little free time he had with someone who only wanted sex.

As he dips into the cafe the cashier greets him with a tired smile.

“Welcome in, just to let you know we close in 10 minutes”

“No problem, I’ll have a large coffee cream and sugar”

“Oh, Ah is (y/n) in today?”

“Umm I’m going to grab the owner” she replies eyeing him suspiciously.

Bobby doesn’t blame her, she doesn’t know him, he hasn’t been in, in about a month. She’s doing the safe thing by getting someone.

“Hey, theres this guy out front that I’ve never seen before asking for Y/N”

“Ok, I’ll go up and check it out. Why don’t you start your end of day tasks”

Stacey makes her way to the front to see who’s asking for you. She’s very happy to see it’s Bobby, the one person you’ve really taking a liking too since he started coming in.

“Hey Bobby, sorry about that”

“It’s no problem, I know she was just being safe, doing the right thing”

“She’s here, back in her usual spot doing some ordering on her laptop” Stacey says as she hands him his coffee.

“I wont stay long, I know your trying to close up”

“You’re welcome to stay as long as you want. She’ll be really happy to see you, but you didn’t hear that from me” Stacey chuckles.

She’ll be happy to see me?

Bobby is rounding the corner into the seating area at the exact moment you happen to look up from your laptop.

The way you light up sends a sea of warmth crashing against his chest. He waves awkwardly and you return the wave.

“Hi” he say unable to contain the smile dancing across his face.

“Bobby! Hi. You’re alright?” The smile creeps across your face.

“What do you mean I’m alright?” He asks tilting his head to the side to watch your expression as he sits.

Fuck. You can feel your skin heating up as you pull your eyes down too your laptop.

He realizes by your reaction that he sounded accusatory when he didn’t mean too.

“I didn’t mean for that to sound that way”

“I didn’t mean anything by it, it’s just been a while since I’d seen you in…uh not that I expect you to come in. I know you’re busy. I um just was worried when it had been a while.” At this point youre face is on fire, you’re making an absolute fool of yourself with your word vomit.

She worries about me

“We’ve had several intense cases back to back. We pretty much were working around the clock. Only went home to sleep. Not that I was really sleeping either.” He says studying you intently, trying desperately to figure out if you feel the palpable connection that’s between the two of you.

“I wish I’d know, I would have brought some stuff from the cafe down for you and your partner.”

“That’s really very sweet of you”

“It’s not like you come in everyday, but regularly enough that I just thought something might of happened to you in the line of duty” you say without thinking, almost like you’d forgotten you were talking to him.

Bobby tilts his head trying to look at your face.

“You really were worried about me. I didn’t mean to worry you”

The realization crashing down on you like a brick. Fuck. I really said that out loud.

“I ah. Man I’m saying a lot of things. I’m sorry I’m trying not to be weird. Didn’t really mean to say that out loud” you say dragging your hands down your face as you pull your eyes up to find him already looking at you.

His deep brown eyes are soft, his smile kind as he watches you.

“No it’s not like that. It’s nice to know someone’s worried about me.”

“I’m sure lots of people are worried about you, you’re pretty awesome.”

OH MY GOD. I need to stop talking. What the hell am I doing. This man is not interested in my flattery. Where is literally anyone to cut into this conversation to save me from myself.

Just then as if you materialized her yourself you notice Stacey over Bobby’s shoulder coming towards the two of you.

“Did our girl over here tell you she’s testing out some new recipes for the bakery case? And that she’s knocking it out of park?”

“No she didn’t, she must of forgotten to tell me how much of a badass she is.”

Your face is beat read at that point, meanwhile the both of them are smiling ear to ear talking about you.

“Yea she’s like that, she’s too modest really. I tell her all the time she needs to brag about her pastries more often”

“Man you two are quiet the pair today” you laugh

“Besides, why brag about myself, I’m just an average baker. I’m no Gordon Ramsay”

“I don’t see Gordon Ramsay making apple danishes and apple bread. I bet you could kick his ass” Stacey adds as you all begin to laugh.

Bobby relishes bring included in this moment of banter. Seeing how light and free you are when your wall is completely down and there’s no anxiety in sight.

“I’d love to try them, can I?” Bobby cuts in.

He doesn’t miss the way your face lights up at his comment.

“Sure, I think there’s still some left from my test batch this morning let me go check”

You say before going out back to check.

“Can I ask you something about her?” Bobby asks, his voice soft with a hint of hesitation.

“Of corse you can, though I might not give you a answer”

Bobby can’t help but smile at Stacey’s direct protectiveness of you. He’s happy you have a friend like her.

“Does she have a boyfriend?”

“No she doesn’t” Stacey says arching your eyebrow in curiosity.

“Do you think she’d want to go to dinner with me?”

Stacey looks over her shoulder to see if you were coming before answering.

“I’m going to be real honest for a second. Yes, honestly I think she would love to go to dinner with you. She really enjoys when you come in and truly was worried something had happened to you when you didn’t for a while. But with that being said don’t ask her if you’re not serious about going actually. Don’t ask her just to blow her off or to only get what you want when it’s convenient for you.”

“I get where your coming from”

“I’m not trying to say you’re the type to do that. She just-she has a big heart and people love to take advantage of that. She doesn’t trust or open up easy. At times she has crippling anxiety. So just be patient with her. Your smart and perspective, I’m sure you’ve noticed that her anxiety eases when she sees that you’re here”

Bobby knows exactly what Stacey’s talking about. He picked up on your anxiety immediately, notcing that over time when he’d come in at peak times you’d sometimes be drowning in your anxiety. But he swore you’d look up and connect eyes with you and he’d see your expression soften, your body become less tense. He always thought it was his eyes playing tricks on him, letting himself see what he wanted to see. But Stacey confirming it was real made the fire in his chest burn hotter.

As they can hear you coming back Stacey leans in quickly to Bobby so you don’t hear.

“She finds comfort in you, please don’t take that for granted”

Bobby nods, you’re too close now to respond. He appreciates the serious heart to heart with Stacey.

“Hey sorry it took so long, I think they taste better heated up so I was waiting for the little oven to heat up so I could warm them up for you”

“Well I’ll leave you guys to it, I’ll be in the office for a bit doing payroll. Welcome back Bobby, it was nice to see you” Stacey offers before leaving the two of you alone.

“Thank you, you didn’t have to go through all that trouble for me”

“Oh no it’s no worries, really. Oh I ah should have asked do you need it packed up? You probably need to get back to work.”

“Im actually all done for the day. But I can go, I’m sure you want to go home.” Bobby says as he starts to stand, worried he’s over stayed his welcome.

“Oh ok, here let me pack these up for you”

You’re disappointed, Bobby can tell by your tone. He feels clueless navigating stuff like this sometimes. He never wants to come off as over baring or clingy, he’s been sold so many times that needy guys aren’t attractive.

“It was nice to see you today, hope you like the pastries” you offer unable to tamp down your smile. There was just something about Bobby that drew you too him, that made you feel like there’s this electricity between the two of you.

Bobby’s half way through the doorway when he doubles back. His hearts pounding but he just has to do it.

“Sorry, one more thing. Would you like to go to dinner with me sometime?”

“Like…on a date?” You ask shifting on your feet nervously. It couldn’t be could it?

“Yes, If you’d want that. If not id still like to go as friends.” Bobby wonders if you can see if his heart pounding in is chest because, fuck- he was nervous.

“I’d really like that…to go on a date with you”

A genuine smile rolls so quickly over both of your faces as both of you look at each other in awe.

You go around the counter to get a piece of paper and a pen.

“Here, this is my number just let me know when it works with your schedule and I can make it work with mine”

“Heres mine as well”

The way your fingers graze his when you take his card send electricity shooting through his whole body.

“I’m off the whole week because of all the over time I’ve worked, are you free tomorrow or is that to short notice?”

“No, that works for me I can do that”

Your smile makes Goren feel like he’s the only person in the world.

“Does 5 o’clock work?”

“Works for me”

“Where can I pick you up?”

“You can pick me up here”

“Oh ah I don’t want to rush you, making you get ready here”

“Oh” you let out a little laugh. “I just live upstairs. Stacey and I both do”

“Just ring the buzzer for Apartment 1 next to the graffiti covered door and I’ll come right down”

——————————————————————

The buzzer sounds as you quickly pad across your apartment to the call box.

“Hello”

“Hey it’s Bobby, sorry I’m a little early”

“It’s ok, let me grab my shoes and I’ll be right down”

Bobby fidgets with his hands, rubbing his thumb into the palm of the opposite hand while he waits.

He can’t help the smile that comes at just hearing the door click open and it only grows as you open the door and step out on to the sidewalk. The way the early evening sun hits you makes you look ethereal.

“You look beautiful, I like your dress” Bobby beams.

“Thank you so much, I had to get it when I saw it, but never had a reason to wear it” you smile.

“You look very handsome” you try to turn away but he catches a glimpse of you blushing. Bobby thinks it’s so cute when to get shy like this.

“I really like your suite, it’s a nice color on you” you say reaching over and rubbing the fabric between your index finger and thumb. “It’s soft too” you say with a smile.

Bobby lets out a content hum, the sound makes you painfully aware that you actually did in-fact feel the fabric of his suite coat.

“Oh god I’m sorry” you say pulling your focus to the ground. “I have this bad habit of feeling the texture of things”

“It’s ok, I get it. You’re a tactile person. Please don’t feel bad. I also have a bad habit of touching things. Picking things up and checking them out or playing with them. And most people really don’t like it when you touch their stuff. I try not to but I just can’t help myself.”

“You can feel my dress if you want”

Bobby can’t help but smile at the gesture and the meaning behind it.

His finger tips lightly graze the bare skin of your arm as he takes the fabric of your sleeve between his fingers.

The little giggle that bubbles out of you when the sensation of his touch tickles you leaves him breathless.

To any just passerby this scene unfolding must look awkward. And it is, but it is the must beautiful kind of awkward. The both of you showing vulnerable glimpses of yourselves to one another and being met with nothing but acceptance.

“Do you like Italian food? There’s a great place near here I thought I could take you too, if you’d like”

“I love Italian, that sounds great”

The two of you fall into comfortable small talk as you walk to the restaurant.

The two of you are met with a warm happy welcome when you walk into a quaint restaurant.

“Welcome back, Bobby! Your usual table and meal tonight?” The hostess says with a smile.

He comes here often

“I…ah actually would like table for two tonight” Bobby responds as he turns to smile at you.

“Wonderful, right this way” the waitress beams

“Their food is very good here. The veal parmesan is my favorite but you really can’t go wrong with anything here”

“Can I get anything else to drink besides water for the two of you?”

“I’ll have a glass of red wine please”

“And for you miss?”

“Oh, just water is ok for me”

“I’ll ah I’ll just stick with water too”

“No, no it’s ok, please have the wine”

“Sorry I should have asked if you were ok with alcohol.”

“Really it’s ok. It’s not like that. I just… I’m admittedly very nervous about tonight so if I mix that with alcohol, I’ll just talk your ear off” you laugh.

“I think I’d like that” he smiles. He could listen to you talk all night long.

It’s at this point you’re painfully aware that the restaurant is getting very busy. A huge party arrived taking over one whole side of the tiny space. You’re trying to ignore it, to just focus on the sound of Bobby’s soothing voice. You so badly want tonight to go well, and certainly having a panic attack within the middle of the restaurant would not help in that.

The two of you order dinner, as the loud drone of conversations are crashing together. Your heart starts pounding as all the chatter becomes impossible to sort through. You squirming around in your seat as you try to sooth yourself doesn’t go unnoticed by Bobby. He sees your pulse quickening in the glow of the restaurant, as your eyes squeeze shut. He knows right away you’re having a panic attack without you having to say anything as he springs into action.

Quietly he goes up to the hostess, explaining that you’re not feeling well and asks to pay for dinner and for it to-go.

When he turns back you’re gripping the table so tightly your knuckles are white.

Bobby kneels down next to you,smoothing his hand up and down your back. The way you relax into his touch fills his chest with that familiar warm sensation.

“Why don’t we go” he softly says into your ear.

I really fucking did it now

Letting out a pained sigh you slowly stand. You can’t even bring yourself to look at him as he guides the two of you out of the restaurant, his hand never leaving your lower back.

“Are you ok?” He tilts his head trying to look at your face.

You can feel yourself retreated further and further inward, embarrassed and upset with yourself.

“I should go, I’m sorry I ruined your night. Thank you for taking me out, or atleast trying too”

You turn to walk away but Bobby reaches out for your arm, stopping you in your tracks.

“Please wait. I’ll take you home if you’d like. But you need to know you’d your not ruining my night.”

“That’s very nice of you but…” you start but Bobby cuts you off when he sees tears in your eyes.

“Hey, do you like ice cream? What if we got ice cream and walked around the park?

“Wait you want to continue our date by getting ice cream when we couldn’t even get though dinner”

“I won’t tell if you won’t” Bobby smirks

“Ok” you smile

“Maybe there will be a lot of ducks at the pound” you say smiling up at him as the two of you exit the ice cream parlor.

“You like animals” it’s less of a question and more of making a mental note out loud.

“I do. I love animals. I like them more than most people because all they want is to give and receive unconditional love. They don’t judge you. They’re just there for you.”

“I never thought about it that way, but you’re right. It really is unfair that some of us have to feel that way.”

“It is because I don’t think you ever fully get used to being an acquired for most people. I just wish It hadn’t taken me so long to realize most people were just using me.”

Bobby’s both saddened and surprised by your comment. On one hand it hurts him that you’ve ever had to feel this way, that you’ve had to experience that same kind of loneliness. And on the other hand he’s never had someone pull the thoughts right out of his own head, to be able put to words to what that exact feeling is like.

A thought occurred to Bobby- Would she let me hold her hand. Before he can stop himself hes sliding his hand softly down your fore arm to lace his fingers with yours.

“Is this ok?” Bobby asks bashfully asks as the two of you enter the park.

The way you lock eyes with him when you answer, the way you’re filled with pure happiness radiating off of you makes the breath catch in his throat. He’s never felt this free before with anyone and he’s prepared to make sure you feel that you’ll always feel that way too.

—————————————————————-

That one date turned into the two of you seeing eachother every day that week that Bobby was off.

That week turned into months, 4 months to be exact and as you burst onto the street below, your arms full of bags Bobby cant remember a time he was happier.

“What’s all this?” He laughs as he takes the bags as you two wait for a cab to his place.

“We havnt gotten to see each other in a couple weeks, I though I could cook dinner for us and we could just relax, watch some movies or read.”

“You don’t have to go through all that trouble”

“Well I want too, besides I got a new cookbook with some of the gift cards you gave me for the bookstore. So there’s some stuff I’ve been dying to make.

“ you know.. you didn’t have to do that you know. You didn’t have to send that gift card over”

“I know. But I was upset I couldn’t take you to the book store to get that new book you’ve been excited about. Were you able to get it?”

“Yes! I was able to get the last signed edition they had” you beam up at him, unable to contain your excitement.

“I havnt finished it yet, but it’s so good Bobby! I brought it so you could see it, can I show you?”

“Of course” he smiles as he leans against you, looking on as you show him the book.

“Do you mind if shower quickly?”

“Of course, no rush. I’ll get started on dinner. Take your time, don’t worry about me” you coo, wrapping your arms around his neck as you push yourself up on your tippy toes to kiss him.

As Bobby wipes the steam covered mirror with his towel he can’t help but stare at his own reflection, desperate to see himself the way you see him. Everything about being around you feels like a dream, still In disbelief that a girl like you would choose to spend time with him. That a girl like you who’s so kind, patient and loving wants him in her world.

Bobby knew he wasn’t for everyone, that most people thought he was to weird, obsessive and by the book. He had a short fuse when it came to other peoples bullshit and could be somewhat of a loose cannon but the moment someone made comments about him he would shrink back into himself because deep down he always believed their hateful words.

But when you look at him, your eyes are always filled with a level of love and empathy that he’s never received from anyone before. Bobby knows he’s weird, that there’s a lot about himself and his personality that he can’t help. When it comes to you though he feels free, he never feels out of place or like he doesn’t fit into society when he’s with you.

The sight of you swaying to the music you have on as you cook makes his heart thunder in his chest.

I love this women

“Dance with me for a moment while dinner cooks” Bobby whispers, his breath fanning your neck as he wraps his arms around you nuzzling into you.

“I don’t know how too” you giggle, never getting enough when he’s like this- clingy and playfully romantic.

“It’s ok, follow my lead. I’ll teach you.” Bobby relishes moments like this. He loved teaching you things.

“There, that’s it, just like that” he coos as the two of you glide around the kitchen.

You let out the cutest content hum as you buried your face in his chest. He gradually slows the two of you to a stop as he holds you In the middle of the kitchen.

“What are you thinking about?” He asks kissing the crown of your head.

You tilt your head up to find his deep brown eyes watching you intently.

“I’m thinking about how happy you make me”

Just as he’s about to reply Bobby’s work phone starts ringing. He lets out a gravely growl.

“I’m sorry, that’s work I have to get it”

“It’s ok” you whisper stepping back to busy yourself taking dinner out of the oven. You try to hide the fact that you’re sad, but it’s useless, Bobby knows he can feel it, he knows your micro-expressions like the back of his hand.

“This is Goren” he answers the phone as he steps into the living room.

The rest of the phone call is in a quick hushed tone. You can tell Bobby’s frustrated by the call.

“I-I have to go. I’m really sorry. There’s a huge development in our case and they need me”

“It’s ok. I’ll just put this in the fridge and go too”

“No no. It’s ok please stay. Make yourself at home. I will be back I just don’t know when.”

“O-okay”

This couldn’t have come at a worse time is all Bobby can think as he makes his way to the station. You’re always so good about his schedule but this is the first time he’s had to leave abruptly like that for work and while you were at his place no less. A place you havnt been many times and he knows your probably anxious right now about being there alone.

“What’s the update?”

“The manager of a motel in the Catskills called the tip line saying a father and two children matching Nathan and his kids checked into his motel a couple of hours ago. Chef wants us to go out there and stake it out.”

“Alright let’s head out then”

——————————————————————

“Sorry to have to call you in Bobby” Eames says finally breaking the silence in the back of the stake out van.

“It’s fine, wasn’t trying to be short on the phone” Bobby waves his hand as he’s looking out the window.

“Eames I think I got something” he says handing her the binoculars.

“Over there at the vending machine, I think that’s Lilly, Nathan’s daughter”

“She was pretty glued to you when we were there for questioning drew you that picture, maybe she remembers you. If she does she could get us access to Nathan.”

Eames and Bobby cautiously approach the little girl at the vending machine.

“Hi Lily, do you remember me and my partner Alex? We came to your house a few times.”

“Yes, policeman Bobby. Did you hang my picture up?”

“Of course I did, right next to my desk just like I said.” Bobby says kneeling next to Lily.

“You did! I hope everyone likes it!” Lily’s eyes light up as she scoots closer to Bobby.

“Can you tell us where you dad and brother are?” Eames asks

“They are in the room. Dad and bothers hair is turning blonde but the room is really stinky so I came out here. Dad said mine would change too.”

“He’s bleaching their hair” Bobby says locking eyes with Eames.

“Sweetheart, do you think you could take us to the room, we’d like our hair blonde too.”

“Ok, but could I have some more chips? I’m hungry”

“Yes, let’s get you some more chips” Bobby says pulling a dollar from his pocket and slipping it into the machine and handing the chips to the girl.

“Can you show us the way? we don’t know where to go?”

“Mmhmm” Lily hums happily as her little hand grabs Bobby’s.

Bobby and Eames hang back a moment as Lily enters the room.

“Daddy! My friend are here and they got me some chips!”

Nathan looks up to unexpectedly to find the pair starring back at him, scrambling he draws his gun.

“Hey..hey point your gun at me not my partner.” Bobby’s voice booms

“We’re just here to talk Nathan, we walk to help you.”

“Bull shit you don’t want to help me. You don’t give a shit about me. You just want to take my family away.” Nathan gestures angrily, turning his attention back towards Eames.

“Hey what did I tell you focus on me, not my partner.”

“We do want to help you, and we will. We will make sure that you have access to therapy and meds on the inside.”

“Fuck you man I’m not going away, you’re not putting my kids with strangers” Nathan reaches for Lilly while waving his gun at Bobby.

“Daddy please stop shouting at my friends”

“Shut up, they’re not your friends, they want to take you away from me just like they did with mommy”

“Why don’t you let my partner take the kids to the diner to get some food and you and I will have a talk.”

“Give her your gun and phone, put them on the floor and slid them over to her, no funny business” Nathan motions his gun towards Eames.

Bobby does what he’s told. He knows it’s risky but he needs to get Eames and the kids out of here.

“Lily can you draw me some new pictures to hang up at work?”

“Ok I can do that” she says as she takes Eames and her brother’s hand and they all leave.

“You know she looks up to you, ever since the two of you came poking around the house asking question she’s talked about you guys nonstop. It’s pretty cruel to tell a child you care just to get what you want.”

“I’m not lying. I hung the picture up next to my desk.”

“You’re the one lying to her about us taking her mother away.”

“If you hadn’t of been hanging around asking questions….” Bobby cuts Nathan off mid sentence.

“Nathan. Your embezzling money, stealing from your clients. We’re doing our jobs asking questions.”

“If you didn’t come around asking questions that made my wife suspicious she’d still be alive.”

“Don’t put that on me. You killed your wife not me.” Bobby shouts unable to keep his cool any longer.

“You don’t get it do you? This is a eye for a eye situation”

“So what, you want to hurt me? You want hit me? Go ahead, give me the best you’ve got.” Goren snarls.

Nathan laughs

“Only one of us is leaving this room and it’s not going to be you Bobby”

“You’re really stooping to a new low threatening a detective.”

“It’s not a threat. Your not leaving this room alive”

Bobby’s starting to panic, his heart pounding against his chest as he try’s to figure a way out.

“If you kill me youll never see your kids again, you’ll loose everything.”

“I already lost everything when you forced me to kill my wife. My only choice is to take you out.” Nathan says as he takes a step closer

“And what are you going do when your daughter comes in here and sees you’ve killed her friend.”

“Do not talk about my daughter. She needs to learn that the world is cruel and that not everyone is what they seem” Nathan spits as he digs the gun into Bobby’s chest.

Bobby’s mind races as he try’s to slow his breathing. He knows Nathan wants to see him panicking, he’s desperately trying to ease his mind. In all of his career he’s never felt this close to death, he can’t do that to Eames or to you.

“Hope you told the person you have at home that you love them because you’ll never see them again”

In an instant all Bobby sees is your face, the way you looked into his eyes as he lead you around his kitchen in a dance. Everything about it was so simple and romantic and then you told him how happy he makes you. And then he never got to tell you how happy you make him, how he’s never loved anyone the way he loves you. The idea of never getting to see what life would be like with you makes him see red and he snaps.

“Well come on, do it if you’re going to do it” Bobby Growls. The pain of his thoughts being flooded with moments that would never be with you, hurts worse than death it’s self he’s sure of it.

A rapid secession of bangs rings out from the other side of the door rendering Nathan distracted for a slipt second. Bobby lunges forward grabbing ahold of the gun and kicking his knee trying to knock him down.

He pushes against Bobby causing him to stumble back, he attempts to take a shot at Bobby but when does he pushes hard back into him. The bullet lodges into the wall as Nathan regains his footing holding the gun on Bobby.

Eames bursts through the door in this moment.

“Nathan drop your weapon” she shouts holding her gun on him.

“Your going to have to shoot me or I’m going to shoot your partner”

Nathan lunges torwards Bobby and with out hesitation Eames shoots him in the b chest in self defense.

Bobby sits there in the back of the van, his head in his hands as they make the couple hour drive back to the city.

“Are you alright, Bobby?” Eames asks needing to check on her partner.

“Am I am ok? No I’m not ok. I almost died. Almost never saw her again.” He grits out, frazzled and shaken by the whole ordeal.

“Ugh sorry. I didn’t mean to yell, I’m just shaken up”

“I heard what he said to you. You love her don’t you?”

Bobby nods in response, afraid to say it out loud.

“Does she know?”

“No” Bobby shakes his head with a low voice. He lets out a long breathy sigh as he leans his head back against the wall of the van before closing his eyes.

“I feel loved too” Bobby breaths out into the dark quietness of the van as they pull back into the station garage.

Bobby never talks like this, so Eames knows he’s being genuine and vulnerable with her.

“You go, I’ll go up and do our paperwork before I go home.”

“No it’s ok”

“You’ve had a long night, you deserve some rest. Take a few paid days off. If the captain has an issue with it he can take it up with me”

“Thank you, Eames” Bobby gives her a tight lipped smile before heading to his car.

You’re all he can think about on you his drive home. He’s so distraught and disheveled over tonight’s events. All he wants right now is for you to crowd his senses, to be in your arms with your hands messaging through his hair as you tell him everything going to be alright.

As Bobby pulls up to his places he hope that some luck is on his side, that you’ll still be there but he fears it’s unlikely. After a few minutes he drags himself inside. You left the light on above the sink for him, there’s a note telling him that dinner is in the fridge for him. He takes this as a sign that you’ve left and his shoulders sag a little.

He just stairs at the small plate of food on the counter. His nerves are still through the roof from work but he knows he needs to eat, not really remembering the last time he did. He’s aimlessly pacing around the kitchen picking at the plate of food when he notices warm dim light coming from his bedroom.

Maybe she did stay.

Bobby stops in his tracks at the sight of you sound asleep in his bed with a your book laid across your chest. He can’t help but tear up as he sinks down on the bed next to you, leaning over you to grab your bookmark off the bedside table. As he gently takes the book off your chest and places the bookmark inside he notices your wearing one of his undershirts as a bed shirt.

Softly he lets his body fall onto yours, his head nuzzling into the crook of your neck.

“Mmhmm Bobby” you hum sleepily as you wrap your arms around him tightly, one hand instinctually messaging through his short greying curls.

Bobby lets out a ragged breath as he melts further into you.

“What time is it? I should go and let you get some rest.”

“Please…don’t go. Don’t leave me alone” Bobby chokes out.

“I-I I’m not going anywhere Bobby”

“Do you want to talk about it?”

“Not tonight, not right now. I’m just to-I was just to scared I’d never see you again. I just want to be near you”

“Why don’t we take a shower, that will help sooth you.

Bobby watches you in complete awe of the way you move around the bathroom getting the shower ready, at how caring and loving you are with him. It’s hard for him to believe that all of this is real. That someone like you would truthfully care for him, would want to spend time with him. It’s hard for him to trust people because of his line of work and the life hes had, but opening up to and trusting you was the best decision he ever made.

Taglist: @malindacath @aselys @jupiteress @yesalwayswelles @samfromstardewsgf23 @pixiehex1985 @celticwitchofsorrow @capondi @thatsjustdandy @storywriter12 @namesirrelevant @lzrdonaleash @thegirlthatwillstealurman @modestlyabsurd @cheyanne-chan @darkangelforever333 @gertieisayellowjeep @shuilian @elefrog25-blog @nightsore @dumbasswalkinghere @liviadrusilla44 @musicalwayshelp0193-blog @malevolent-muse @mandy426 @missingfromthephotographs

[whereispearlescentmoon]

Wild Life Pearl POV Reaction

Hell yeah! Scott’s on board with being chaotic!

Oh he knows what Pearl did… wuh woh.

Scott changed his skin without turning yellow, so name mc spoilers have actually failed me.

“Operation get Pearl back to green” I don’t think this is going to happen if the namemc spoilers were any indication . Actually why do I feel dread?

BigB is here!!! Guess we really are letting bygones be bygones.

Robot quiz about the Life Series? I actually don’t like this tbh. Doesn’t seem fair to Pearl, Ren, Skizz, Mumbo, and Lizzie who weren’t in some of the series.

BigB is really back!!!!!

“Cleo that looks good on you there. Forgiveness.” “BigB, do you want to test me?”

Ah the hole jokes.

Oh the quiz bots go to one person?

“I forgot, I was out so early” “I see Grian, that’s why you don’t respect my win…” GET HIM CLEO GET HIM

Oh no Cleo got got….

Pearl’s first question. This one is about the current life series so that seems more fair. Although Pearl by her own admission on stream doesn’t watch other POVs because she doesn’t want spoilers of what people are planning.

“Hi! I’m Cleo!” Dont think I didn’t catch that season 9 throw back.

“I’m a spider today!” Aussie Aussie Aussie!

“It’s a question about the only season I wasn’t in!” THIS IS WHAT IM SAYING SKIZZ! And him and Pearl only missed one season! What about Ren, Mumbo, and Lizzie who missed two (three for Lizzie if you count Real Life which evidently the quiz has questions about!)? What about Gem who only joined in Secret Life?

“What did Pearl and Scar use to hurt their soulmates in Double Life?” Every Pearl fan stares off into the distance shaking from the cold. Also Grian just not telling Skizz the solution… Spanner divorce.

BigB, Martyn, and Jimmy mass death? Ohh that’s what happens when you get it wrong. Yeah I’m actually really not a fan of this wild card. And it spawns a ravager which can kill others in the area. Great, perfectly balanced. No notes.

Wait wait, so sometimes it kills you and sometimes you just get huge? How is that fair at all? I’m sorry but it seems like this and the snail twist both needed massive balancing reconsiderations.

“Should we go antagonize Gem and Joel? Seems like a good idea.” “You’re calling the shots so sure.” “All in! All in!” How I’ve always wanted Scott and Cleo to respond to Pearl /j

“On a scale of 1-10 how much do you love me today?” “Oh, like 0,” “*sigh* I try every time,” The shiny duo divorce continues. Also, you don’t seem to hate her very much Gem, given that you’re chit chatting like nothing is wrong at all.

“Don’t be alone today, that’s scary,”

“It’s okay I’ve got lots of lives to spare, unlike some people,”

“That was unnecessary. I’m tired of this fighting Gem! Cant we be friends?”

“No? You want to kill me!”

“No, no I don’t! When have I ever tried to kill you this season?”

“Not this season.”

“Exactly. You know Scar allied with us in that last episode of Secret Life right? You know. I didn’t kill you. I let Scar do it.”

“I know you didn’t kill me,”

“So what are you cranky about? Do we need to talk about it?”

“I’m not cranky”

“You are cranky!”

“I just, you know I wanted drama. So this is the drama.”

“This is the drama. You’re telling me we could have been friends this whole time but you’re just like ‘ohohohoho I hate you’”

“Yeah, I mean why not?” SO EVEN GEM ADMITS ITS ABOUT NOTHING! That’s actually so slay of her.

YOU CANT TYPE IN CHAT????? THE SNAIL IS BACK IF YOU FAIL??? CLEO IS ON SEVEN HEARTS AND NOT REGENING??!? I just… these punishments are so unbalanced. Scar gets insta killed by a snail, one of them triple killed, Grian just got big, and Cleo is fine as long as she doesn’t take damage.

Hi Billy!

Oh Gem is at their base for once! SHE BLEW UP CLEO? Or got her blown up??? Oh she’s gotta die.

“Does anyone have a thing of flint and steel?” Dangerous question coming from notorious arsonist ZombieCleo. “I’m gonna hit Gem in the one place she actually cares about” There it is! Missed you bestie arsonist!

PEARL BLEW HERSELF UP WITH MARTYN!!! And since he’s on light green, she’s on red.

CLEO BURNED DOWN THE RENWOOD HOUSE! YAAAAAY I LOVE YOU ARSONIST CLEO!!!!

“Haven’t you accepted in this series that nothing stays alive?” Hey Pearl, that was the rawest fucking thing I’ve ever heard. Congrats.

Yay Scarlet Pearl! Oh no… Scarlet Pearl… :(

Pearl your kill attempts do get a little sad if you fail like four different times. Love your girl fail nature bestie! Love your pathetic wet cat aura!

A robot voice modulator for failing? Oh wait they can’t understand her at all????? Her pathetic wet cat aura is so strong! Especially her big nods when Gem offers to hang out when they’re both red! Also Gem and Joel just trying to get her to kill Scott while she tries to fight them and they can’t understand is so funny.

Pearl and Impulse pretending to understand each other is so funny. And Pearl still talking in spite of everything is also hilarious. Tango is blooping as well!! Yay!! Also it’s like Skizz could understand that Pearl was complementing him.

Tango getting in a boat and stealing Skizz’s robot is so funny.

We have Etho now! Yay!

Wait a second. Scott didn’t you promise Pearl a life when she went red. Where’s the self sacrifice blue boy? Come on blue boy.

MUMBO FIRST OUT OH NO! Can’t wait for the fandom to once again misuse what a canary is and apply it to him!

PEARL NO DONT HOLD OUT KILL HIM TO GET YELLOW PLS! PEARL! PEARL!

“I get to wack you a little bit longer, get a little therapy” “After this, we’re settled, no more grudges” The Galaxy duo experience is this happening multiple times every season. Not mad about it though.

“The real full circle moment would have been if we had snow in this” Powdered snow mention two! Also not the puffer fish killing Scott before Pearl can hit him lol.

Pearlie got her mace! Yay!

We have BigB and Etho on our team now!

Honestly, my final thoughts are I don’t love this week’s wild card. The punishments seem unbalanced and the questions aren’t fair to those who weren’t in certain life series. I know that people get pissed if you dare criticize anything to do with anything but like, it’s literally just my opinion.

[fenharel]

some of my thoughts after finishing veilguard a couple days ago before i start my second playthrough :)

ok i think its important to note first that the things i was most looking forward too was 1. solas, 2. solavellan, 3. lore. im self aware enough to know that this will have had some influence towards what i expected from the game and what i enjoyed/cared about or not 👍

good

solas: im honestly so happy. my man is finally happy and reunited with his wife!!!!!! my heart feels so full 😭 this game was a solas fans wet dream. absolutely loved everything we got. hunting down regrets and watching old memories. talking to him in the fade. the entire crossroads!!!!!! him shit talking elgar'nan. watching him go trickster mode and imprison rook. fighting the archdemon as the dread wolf!!!!!! i could go on forever. CHEFS KISS TO IT ALL<3333333333333 if anything i wish there would have been MORE im greedy what can i say

solavellan: screaming crying throwing up. i still cant believe it oh my fucking god

lore reveals: i found all the reveals about all our old theories so fun. i didnt like all of them (old gods are just dragons? c'mon.) but overall it felt so rewarding to have picked up on it all. or be totally surprised by something (mythal and solas the reason for the titans and the blight? wow.)

the executors, forgotten and forbidden ones: the next big bads of the next game huh!!!! loved what we got for the most part, the mysterious circle codexes where probably the most interesting in the game. anaris actually showing up shocked me. i wish bellaras brother didnt say "for plot reasons i must die" and actually told us something about him but oh well. im cautiously optimistic about the secret ending for now. what it implied could go either way for now...

main quest: not all of them, but a lot of them were awesome. dare i say some quests were up there with the best main quests in da??? weisshaupt was epic. or the blood of arlathan. every time we get to talk to solas (thehe<3). the final bits. the strong points were so strong that the low points got highlighted a bit too much imo

act 3: by far my favourite act. this was soooo good. the romance finally (?!) kicking it. suicide mission 2.0 stressed me tf out. the varric reveal? send me to the asylum. solas tricking rook? king behaviour i was cheering for him while crying about varric. the dread wolf transformation. the conversation between solas/mythal/lavellan at the end. i basically was in tears throughout half of the thing. couldnt read the credits at all. act 3 was amazing

minrathous vs treviso: i loved this especially with the angst of playing a shadow dragon who failed minrathous. and then the consequences and quest changes this causes throughout the game was really cool. i wish there were more bigger choices like this since it felt a bit flat choice wise besides of this one, but it was amazing.

villains: ghilan'nain and elgar'nan were great. they really felt like the tyrannical gods they were supposed to be. im so glad there was mostly no corypheus-esque cringe. (tho especially ghil had some video gamey lines but sdjkfhjksdf i still love her)

neutral

rook: i dont really care much about rook.. 🙈. mind you rook was certainly not the reason why i wanted to play this game so im sure a second playthrough will make me warm up to them more, now that my head is more free, but it just didnt insta click. rook didnt feel like a real person to me, almost nobody had any (to my taste) realistic reactions towards them. the stakes just were too high for them to get treated this way (nobody is pissed off that they freed the gods? everyone just believes them when they say gods are walking around? everyone just agrees to work with them? nobody cares how rook is doing? or who rook even is? idk.) i didnt like the introduction much either. the shepard treatment didnt work for me here, just believing that rook is fit for the job because varric says so wasn't enough for me. anyway i dont wanna bash on rook, i know i'll end up liking them later. the headcanons will be headcanoning<3

companions: i... don't have strong feelings about most of them? all of them got to me sooner or later, made me cry. but afterwards im still 🤷‍♀️ about most. i didnt feel like we get to know them as deeply as we get to know companions in the previous games. i really really missed sitting in the lighthouse for hours and talk to them, ask them about their profession or what they are about outside of cutscenes like in the previous ones. i think that would have helped me click with them faster. i didnt find all companion quests very strong either. the "high stakes" of the main story made some conflicts feel a bit like we can just fix that after the story lol. i did not like the mass effect 2 treatment of them much... (but me2 is overrated anyway sshh dont kill me<3) some companion quests i did find interesting lore wise (bellara, harding) even if i wish that some of them would have went a bit deeper there. anyway i know i'll probably end up loving them all after a couple of playthroughs, this almost always happens to me, dai is the best example.

combat: don't care. this isn't my type of combat, i don't play a lot of super actiony combo dodge dodge block combat games. still hate the limited abilities. at least it didn't feel too clunky on mouse and keyboard and it was "fun enough" to me so thats good

puzzles: i could put them into the bad category but at least they weren't too terrible so i don't want to be too harsh. but i don't enjoy doing them. i dont want to search for a crystal in a bush. i mean i did them all but at what cost. this felt like filler i thought they wanted to avoid by not adding fetch quests???

bad

pacing: this games hardest battle imo. the pacing of the game is... strange. act 1 is way too fast. it feels like we're running and have absolutely no time for anything. (makes sense! didnt work well though). act 2 then drags a bit with all the companion quests, and the mix really drags the progression of the romances as well to a ridiculous degree. at least with lucanis, idk how it is with the others. i love him and i can headcanon to fill in the blanks so i liked his romance, but it does make it seem like nothing is happening for 50 hours for everyone who doesnt like to headcanon around. anyway, the pacing/storytelling felt often not fitting. it was trying to be mass effect in a story that is too complex and the lore too rich to run through it. this felt like the main reason why we just never went very deep into the lore of the factions or new npcs, or learn or see certain things, the complex nature of the crows, or tevinter magisters and their slaves, we are just running all the damn time? we never get to explore certain things that would feel unnatural to come up in a conversation or in some other way because we are limited by the things the story "has time for". or what the devs had time for.

wishy washy writing: not everywhere but in some places and im not used to that in a da game so its a bit baffling. "the blight is different now so thats the reason for x trust me bro" ok....? "the first of my people do not die so easily" = mythal is shattered and lives on, makes sense. but the other evanuris are all dead, even the ones that were "dead" already? why? idk........ i shall stay delusional for now and hope i've missed something in my completionist run that i now in my next run will find somewhere lol.

limited worldstate: im not tooo hung about it but i certainly wish it was different. i had hoped they at least commit to it. but then adding little references that could have just been made personal by switching one line just made the reference a bit jarring sometimes instead of exciting. or making morrigan eat mythals memories for the regret quest....really? this could have been the well of sorrows choice, why could they not have just made the inquisitor show up in the crossroads if they were the one that drank from it. this whole choice thing + some other problems ended up feeling like something they didnt really want to do but ended up doing because the game was in development for so long they just had to finally fucking finish it. and it sucks for us.

the veil: why... is it still there? they left breadcrumps of clues throughout the entire series about all the positives it would do if it was gone, even add a damn prophecy, and then just dont do it.... ever perhaps? must the blight really be cured for this? demons forever feared? listen im just glad solas is ok at the end of the day but he could still have had his redemption/healing/forgiving himself moment after destroying it imo.

i wish the inquisitor was more involved in everything :((( the moments we did get made me SO happy but. yeah.

no quicksave and the skip button that ruined my screenshots deserve their own bullet point what the hell

anyway enough yapping!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! overall i loved the game because the stuff i cared about the most was the best aspects of the game sdkjhsdjkf im not ashamed to admit that this is my new solas 2.0 game. ..... <3

[cat-autism-wizard]

five times danny's english class learned that he was phantom (and one time he had to reveal it)

3 - Mr. Lancer

it was after a big ghost attack at casper high. it was sadly during mr. lancer's lesson. he didnt know what those poor kids would do in the exams if their educations kept on getting interrupted by the ghost attacks. but right now they had bigger problems to dealt with, like running for their lives.

lancer made sure everyone in his class made it out of the class and making sure everyone was out of school. it was a procedure he had to use so much that everyone knew what to do. of course it didnt mean he doesnt follow it. he still makes sure he follows it line by line. and no matter how many ghosts attacked the school, kids were always terrified which made it harder to count them. lancer didnt blame the kids of course. he was feeling bad for them if anything else. those kids were just teenagers and they shouldnt live through this again and again.

lancer tried his best to keep the terrified ones calm and lead everyone to outside. it was the hunter ghost attacking and phantom was already fighting him. no matter what those lousy ghost hunters say lancer trusted phantom to protect them. he saw him saving his kids countless of times.

after everyone was outside he counted his students. only one was missing. daniel fenton. when he spotted one of his friends he decided to ask her.

"ms. manson, i couldnt see mr. fenton do you know where he is?" just for a tiny second lancer saw a little panic flash in the girl's eyes.

"uhh yeah he is with tucker." sam blurted out. lancer could tell she was lying. he was a teacher for almost 15 years, he could tell when a student lied to him.

"great then you wouldnt mind accompanying me see mr. foley and mr. fenton right?" sam cringed to herself probably scolding herself for her bad lie.

"sure" she said with a fake smile.

they walked towards tucker as he was dealing with his phone. no fenton to be seen.

"mr. foley have you seen mr. fenton anywhere?" lancer talked before sam ever could.

"uh yeah he was with sam." tucker said without looking up his phone. only when he heard sam cleaning her throat tucker decided to look up. sam glared at tucker.

"uh did i say sam i meant to say pam" tucker tried to play it off.

"we dont have a 'pam' in our class mr. foley." lancer sighed.

"if you kids didnt know you couldve just said so. he might still be inside im gonna check before he gets hurt." lancer said as he start to head back inside. when both sam and tucker tried to stop him or run inside before him but lancer stopped both of them.

"ms. manson, mr. foley i understand that youre worried about your friend but if you step inside now, you will be suspended for a week." did they really care? no, but they were both smart enough to know that could damage their school record and neither of them wanted that.

not getting a reaction, lancer went back inside to look for danny. he searched almost everywhere but he was nowhere. the only place he didnt check was the hall of his class which had a fight going on. lancer carefully headed to his classroom. then he heard phantom saying something about 'souping the ghost' which meant it was probably safe for him to go there and thats what he did.

he expected to see phantom, yes but what he didnt expect to see was phantom looking so worn out. he looked like he was about to pass out. as lancer was about to thank him and ask him if hes alright glowing rings appeared around phantom's waist. then he transformed into danny fenton.

what. lancer couldnt believe his eyes. he was terrified. he was terrified of the fact that wes was right. what he was more terrified was that danny fenton, a 14 (soon to be 15) year-old kid was fighting and protect them all from the ghosts while trying to pursue his education as well. lancer wasnt easy on him either since he would always be late or fall asleep in the class. now he knew why.

danny was barely staying on his feet. he was tried. before he could fall lancer caught him. a fear set in danny. as lancer realized that, he started to scold him.

"so you were here. youre so lucky that phantom was around mr. fenton. you cannot wander around the school when theres an attack. if i catch you next time like this there will be consequences." with that danny was relieved. he was stressed about the next time because there will be a next time but at least lancer didnt know his identity right?

lancer forced fenton to stay in the infirmary for a few classes. danny whined at first but he was fast asleep as he relaxed when lancer made sure he wasnt going to be called absent in the attendance.

after that day lancer tried to give danny slightly more time on his works and when in detention, he gave him somewhat of an extra class knowing he fell asleep in those lessons.

1 2 3 4 5 +1

[idle-compy]

*JWCT SPOILERS BELOW*

extremely messy live reaction

watched ep 1 from the roblox thing and didn't live react so

ep 2:

BEN GET UR EYES ON THE ROAD

ben eating out of a boot what is wrong with him

this whole van scene is fucking hilarious

BEN BROOKLYNN MEMORIES?? ON A ROOFTOP???

gonna make me cry on ep 2 I see how it is

darius just being overall disgusted with bens lifestyle I'm drying

"benjamin if you don't pull over I'm jumping out of your moving van is that what you want"

"is your friend ok?" "no 🙂"

USING THEY THEM PRONOUNS AS A DEFAULT HELL YEAH

ben has brown eyes at 17 mins

the roadtrip vibes are immaculate once u get past all the conspiracy stuff

why are these 2 licorice fanatics I hate them sm (affectionate)

ep 3:

"that is not at all what Hay smells like. have you never been around Hay before?" I'm obsessed with the dialogue

SAMMY HAVING AN ESTRANGED RELATIONSHIP WITH HER PARWNTS HUH????

"why are we running? we do not have a good track record with running!"

BUMPY CHASIMG BUTTERFLIES MY BABYGITL

she still picks him up 😭😭

mantah corp island investigation hmmm..

"that destructive carnivore" DONT SPEAK ABOUT MY DAIGHTER LIKE THAT

ANOTHER BROOKLYNN MEMORY KILL ME NOW

is that the fuckimg pink jakcet

sammy holding thr box with no effort anf bens big ass almost dropping it

why is so much happening in Sammy's life I wanna give her a hug

"he's getting more than a mud pie! he's getting a knuckle sandwich!" "You kiss your mother with that mouth?"

OH SHIT CARLS DEAD

now sammy has blue eyes wtf

damn that atrocitaptor really hates pies

SAMMY RUN GIRL

bumpy basically telling ben to leave omfg 💔

do his eyes ever stay on thr road

the hug 😭😭

THE BROOKLYNN CONSPIRACY BEGINS

MYSTERY WHISTLE PERSPN

Ep 4:

this eps called "brothers" time to cry

darius mocking ben I love him

"she's fine 😌" "I'm not fine!"

ben calling bumpy a "strokg independent woman" " strange thing to say but ok"

TWO BENJAMIMS??

BEN HAS A GIRLFRIEND NOOPOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

fuxk this

"she lives in.. europe?" he met her on that fucking conspiracy site didn't he

THE ALLOSAURUS

ben u eat food out of a boot u cannot talk ab kenjis place like that

"were not exactly on speaking terms" WHEN ARE YOU EVER

did kenji fucking shrink why does he seem so small

HE SHUT THE DOOR ON DAROUS STOP

THE STICKERS 😭😭

"this is. really something kenj!"

THE FANILY PHOTO IM GONNA SOBBBB

oh good lord the tension

"that's where my dad lives" OH FUCK

"I think we should split up" "you and yaz?!" TJE DISTRESS IN HIS FACE

his hand on his heart for the rest of the conversation he would've been more hurt by a breakup then they wouldve omfg

sammy tickle attacking ben THE FACT THAT SHE KNEW IT WOUD WORK

kenji masterfully climbing while darius is fighting for his life trying to put the gear on

WHY ARE THEY FIGHTIJG ON A MOUTNAIN SIDE

KENJI DUMPED BROOKLYNN?? OMG??

ANOTHER MEMORY

"I can't be with you anymore if you're not going to be with me" 😭😭😭

OH HES CRYING

ope kenj I saw that smile

KENJI AGREED TO SEE HIS DAD THE ANGSSTSTTSTSTST

NOOO THEY GOT BUMPY

ep 5:

WHY IS SO KUCH HAPPENING AROUMD THIS SANDWICH

WHY IS IT EVEN IN THE ROAD LIKE THAT

"that bush looks like ben" what does that even mean darius

KENJI CALLIMG DARIUS' MOM EVERY WEEK HE LOVES HER SM

I love this relationship ben and sammy have they're acting sm like siblings

ANOTHER BENJAMIN

HE STILL EATS CAROB

ben and sammy being dino activists ik that's rihht

mr king dino they could beat ur ass

FUCK YOU DANIEL STOP LOOKIMG HAPPY

THIS MAN TRYING TO LOOK GUILTY STFU

"did you have brooklynn killed?" straight to the point ok

"worried what?? that I'd double cross ya??" WHAT WAS ON THAT STICKY NOTE

BEN PUTTING SAMMY AS A SUSPECT?? ID BE PISSED TOO

he can't say the right thing to save his life

DANIEL TEYING TO KEEP SECRETS I VATE HIM

"just never had a father around to practice with" YEAH YOU GET HIM KENJI

NAH WHATS HE GOT PLANNED

"yeah ok I'll get my violin" kenji ily

NAH DANIELS STILL A SNAKE DONT TRUST HIM KENJI

sammy and ben causing mass destruction without meaning too hold habits die hard ig

YEAH SAMMY BEAT THAT MAN

bens list of loyal and amazing friends:

1) bumpy

2) corndogs

3) his van

DINO KING IS SUSPICIOUS?????

4) sammy

"he's just so!" "graah?" "yes! yes! exactly"

THE BROTHERS ARE COMMUNICSTIJG YEAAAHH

oh God I hope kenji has a backstabbing plan with this agreement

"I won't let you control me anymore" YEAH KENJI WALK AWAY

NUH UH YOU DO NOT GET TO LOOK SAD DANIEL YOU DID THIS TO YOURSELF

"there was something about her that was different. almost dangerous" I am taking everything be says with a grain of salt but things are getting so suspicious??

OH SHIT ANOTHER DEAD GUY

LET 👏 HIM 👏 DIE 👏

THE WHISTLE AGAIN

what in the goddamn green earth is that woman

daniel u may have saved kenji but I still don't like u

THEY KILLED DANIEL WE ALL CHEERED

she seems so robotic I'm terrified

now who is this

not him speaking Japanese 😭 he needs a hug so bad

ep 6:

YAZ I MISSED YOU

her ptsd is hurting her so much omfg

ANOTHER BROOKLYNN MEMORY

moment of respect for the outfit changes in the memories

brooklynn got yaz into dino immersion therapy 😭

these memories are killing me man am I allowed to stop cryjng

SAMMYS CONTACT PHOTO 🫶🫶

BEN LIKES ROCK MUSIC CALLED IT

WHATS HE DOIN THE BG

"we haven't really talked much lately" does ANYONR have a good relationship in this show

"It'll be good for you two to reconnect"

"yeah.. I hope so" IT WILL BE SAMMY IT HAS TO BE

the gfs are still healthy all it good all it well in the world

"no dinosaurs?" "judging by the look of that thing I'd say we have one now"

oh sammy really is treating her like a fragile flower

I already watched this scene in the released clip but bens scream is somehow even more funny

ben still callimg her fadoula I love their relationship

THE GIRLF ARE FIGHTIJG NO

"girlfriend?" "why does everyone act so surprised when insay that" bc u are gay

I feel so bad for all these people like imagine dinos get into the place ur promised they won't be

OH THAT AINT DPW OH SHIT OH FUCK

IVE BEEN WANTING TO SEE THE AFTERMATH OF THE VAN GOING OFF THE BRIDGE YEAH

off topic but I am obsessed with the end credit cards

ep 7

the ep is called "that night" I am in fear

oh that's the moment sammy saw how much yaz has grown calling it now

I feel so bad for kenji rn hes in so much pain :((

he's probably so conflicted rn. daniel only ever hurt him but he's all kenji knows as his dad

THE HUG THE HUG THE HUGGGGG

"I'd be dead if it wasn't for her!" what do you know mateo WHAT DO YOU KNOW

"it was there on purpose" AAAAAAHHHH I mean we knew but AAAAAAHHHHHHHH

HEY DONT DO THE HOPELESS MHSIC WHILE THEYRE TRAPPEDBIN THE VAN I DONT LIKE WHAT IT INDICATES

"I can't have the last thing I see be bens soggy van!"

YEE HAW THEY GOT OUT

MATEOS STORY WOO HOO TIME TO GET SOME GAPS FILLED IN AND SOME ANDWERS QUESTIONED

oh shoot did he accidentally help the bad guys

now why would he get out ofbthe truck in such suspicious circumstances

WE HAD TO SEE HER DIE FROM A DIFFERENT ANGLE ARE YOU KIDDING ME ?!?!?!?!?!??!?!?!?!?

OH HE TOOK THE PHONE

THEY SWITCHED SCENES BEFORE WE COULD SEEBWHAT WAS ON THE PHONE AVAAAHAHAH

oh wow the wet hair animation is so much better omg

GIRLCEIEND MOMENT GIRLFRIEND MOMENT

"I guess we need each other huh" *makes out*

them having their moment while bens grieving his baby

"ciao cara mia" I hate him

BROOK HAD A SECRET HOUSE

kenjis night just keeps getting worse

bros been DYING to throw those phones

"oh I am so gonna haunt them from beyond the grave" never change yaz

where on earth are they gonna hide on that truck

mateo seemed like a decent guy hope all goes well for him

her apartment was cute asf ok brooklynn

DID YALL SEE THE MOTORCYCLE HELMETS ?????????????? YEAH BROOK U WERE THAT GIRL

kenji stop reminiscing ur gonna make me cry

THE BROS ARE BONDING THEYRE GETTING ALOMG

KENJI WHAT DO U SEE

darius putting all the pieces together is so rad bc I sure am not

A SUSPICIOUS BAG OF MONEY???? IN HER CLOSET??? BFOOK GIRL WHAT WERE U A PART OF

SHE WAS WPRKING WITH DANUEL SHE WAS WHAT WHAJAJDHSLAJHFJSLAJD

I hope she was doing it for an investigative purpose SHE BETTER HAVE BEEN

but why didn't Daniel bring it up HMmmmmm...

"or what else she was hiding from us" OH HES HURT HURT

darius driving the motorcycle instead of kenji I'm cackling

ep 8:

THEY HID WITH THE SEDATWD DINO ARE THEY INSANE

not the dino smacking rhe lips it doesn't have

now why is she gonna stand on the dino instead of getting bens giant self to look out the gap

the drop is gonna be how they reunite isn't it

kenji screaming bc of a spider he's so real

THEYRE BEINF BROTJERS YEAH WERE SO BACK BABY

oh so they're working for extra cash too hmm

oh this place actually looks nice

VIDEO MEMORIES IM GONNA SOB

I am sufficiently uncomfortable thanks for asking darius

the boys are fighting again JUST VET ALOMG PLEASE

darius misses her so much seeing a bird made him think of her 😭😭

lookimg at the dates on the voicemails it's been at least 3 months since she died

DARIUS IN BATHTUB I laughed this is supposed to be sad and I laughed

I sense something big coming I gotta walk around for a bit

"I was in love with brooklynn" OH FUCK OH SHITNOH AJAHDKLAQKHFLAKHFKLAL

now I REALLY have to walk around for bc WHAT

WHAT WHAT WHAT WHAT WJAT WJATBQKHRLAJFLAHSLALKFHAL AAAAHAAHAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

rewatched the scene and I am no more sane ab it

BEN THIEVING ABILITIES MAKING A COMEBACN HELL YEAH

NAH WHATD THEY DOBTO BUMPY THEY BETTER NOT HURT MY GIRL

"boo." Yaz ily

THE VIDEO THE VUDEO AAAAAAAAAAAA

"were brothers righr?" HE SAID IT HE SAID IT WE WIN

every single moment with these 2 is so painful how am I supposed to exist in these conditons

WHAT DID THEY DO TO BUMPY WHAT DID THEY DO TO HER

THE GFS SAY I LOVE YOU SO MUCH ❤️❤️❤️❤️

THE DINOS JUST CHILLING INSTEAD OF STAMPEDING

YES QUEEN DINO U KILL THE MAN THAT TORTURED YOU

love the steggos just watching everything

yaz was smart with the lights u go girl

my heart is genuinely pounding for bumpy I am too attached to this fictional dinosaur

avocado costume?????? girls be fr

KENJI AND DARIUS ARE HERE TOO??

DARIUS IS GONNA FREE THAT BABY I KNOW HE IS

I hope the sino causes chaos later

"with me by your side, you kon climb anything too"

YEAH THE SINOS CAUSING CHAOS WOO HOO

"bumpy.. are you dying?" NUH UH BEN DONT SAY THAT NOPE

ALL THE CRYING SCENES THEY GOTTA STOP

kenji doing everything with graceful agility vs darius and his childlike experience

sammy kicking kenji TWICE now

TWO HUGS?? IN A ROW?? IM FED

the hugs are so much more natural in this series the animation improvement is insane

"creepy micro bangs'" that is a fantastic description kenji

THE ALLOSAURUS AGAIN

sammy being bumpys other parent 🫶

istg I'm already cryjng

if they kill bumpy idk what'll happen

bumpy is genuinely a part of their family they are completely falling apart rn

"move her tail!" IS SHE ABOUT TO LAY AN EHG

BUMPYS A MOM????!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!??!???@?!?!?!?!?!?!??

them passing the egg around like a baby in a hospital such a proud family

"wait what?" "don't think about it bud"

"ben! you're gonna be a grandpa!" glad they also see her as his daughter

NAH THE GUY I FORG9T THE NAME OFNIS EVIL

ep 10:

LAST EPUSOXE ALREADY??????

cabrera thats his name

YEAH SAMMY BEAT HIS ASS U GO GIRL

NAH FREAKY BOB LADYS BACK

she is genuinely somebhorror movie shitnor something

that scene was genuinely so intense I completely froze

EHOS DRIVING THE TRUCK

MATEO MY MAN I KNEW YOUNWERE GOOD

THE DINOSBARE GOING FREE BEAUTIFUL GEORGOUS THROWUNG BOUQUETS

obsessed with the shot of the t Rex in front ofbthe explosion hell yeag

"leave my girl alone!" SCREAM IT YAZ

DARIUS FREEING THE ALLOSAURUS I SMELL CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT

WAS THAT BUMPYS EGG IN THAT CASE

about time this man died

creepy lady is actually super pretty I hate that she's evil and kinda insane

darius finally stopped blaming himself 😭

"my guy. you're still here?" "unfortunately yeah. you all get real vulnerable with each other. it's weird" I'm dying

FUCK DUXK A AKHDLAKWYAPAHHFLAHWLAK

BROOKLYNNNANNAMANANNN

OH MY GODBOHNMYNGOD SHES SYDNEY GUYS SHE FUCKIMG SYDNEY ITS FUCKIKG BROOKLYNN AKSHALAKQLLQKDJALJFL

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAJKALAFJAJ

[justanotherpersonsuniverse]

DAMN CAP YOU COOKED THIS IS MASSIVE!! SPOILERS FOR CHAPTER 72 OF PN BELOW BEWEAR!!

OHH SHE TOOK THE EARINGS WITH HER STEALING THEM ok i’m a fool right this makes sense. 

Girl. girl please. “You gotta trust me marinette I’m the only one you can trust” YOU WERE TRYING TO SCAM HER 

Love Fei, the dichotomy of man is so real with her

Damn brother what an intro, and then we snap back to Juleka pretending she is Batman. I hope she is at least enjoying running around on the rooftops she wanted to chapters ago

I genuinely can’t tell if girly has a concussion or not. I am one to be tricked by the narrator so since she’s saying she doesn’t i’m like “Oh ok, i trust you”

Aww cute Alya and Juleka friending it up real style, I like how Alya was begging panthera to find marinette, so real of her. 

Juleka: dont worry i actually do this super often

Alya: be concussed on a rooftop?

HA-

Yooo super soulmate tracking activated??

I still find the fact that Marinette said that they “speedran dating” to be hilarious

Fei panicking like this is her first sleepover is so silly style

AUGH NO MARINETTE IS NOT THE PERSON TO ADMIT YOU WANT TO KILL SOMEONE TO

Like i love girly but damn Fei you did not choose the right person to admit murderous intent to

Like maybe this is good for Fei to be told “hey girl that’s a bit far” but like let the girl get her emotions off her chest before invalidating them LB damn

Cash, my brother, fuck off. Fei, kick him in the balls, I command thee. 

She was being emotionally vulnerable! Let her have her moment! 

Damn brother, Cash really just hit Marinette with the fact that good people can do bad things for reasons they see as good, this will literally break her good people meter.

Panthera where be you

Ricky, ricky when I catch you ricky (me about Cash)

YES GIRL (marinette said screw you, i’m hype)

Oop- Marinette is fighting back, and now she pointed out the obvious (to us, not to Fei) 

Damn brother plot twist (which I forgor) 

Oh dear oh dear oh dear, poor Fei. Girly it’s ok he took advantage of you in a vulnerable state that’s not your fault augh I feel awful for her

NOOO HAWKCOCK RETURNS BAD TIMING FUCK OFF

Help “what’d her glove do?” his hysterical

She pointed at the little akuma resting on her finger, “Are you gonna eat that?”

“Obviously not! Are you- oh you are. Okay.” ok so. Can marinette eat akumas to purify them?

Hey did Fei just get a real concussion?? Exciting

Who are these random lesbians in my father’s ancient duty cave? I ACTUALLY LOST IT

Oh damn the prodigious have shown up this chapter! Nice. 

NAH NOT HAWKMOTH HAVING PTSD FROM PANTHERA HAAA

Sorry not many comments on this bit i’m too into it to write

Realest reaction to gaining super powers

Wha da hell the renlings are mad. I do not remember them from the shanghai special i just remembered big lion guy

Damn motherfucker this shit bangs

Fei having the time of her life is very fun, it’s also been rather novel to have so much not-Juleka POV lately! Though that tracks with how much you like Fei!

I do wonder if you’re going to have her show up outside of this arc or naw, I guess i shall wait and see >:3

Could these lesbians please focus? HELP FEI STOP BEING SILLY

Damn nobody wants her to kill Cash. except me, Kill him Fei. I demand thee. 

I mean i think it would permanently scar her, but yknow, character building gotta come from somewhere buddy

Goddamn!! That rocked. Fei kicked his ass, hell yeah. Glad she didn’t kill him though (shush i have layers)

Help the awkward after battle chat with Hawkmoth what is this

FEI HAS A POINT THIS IS WEIRD AS SHIT

Backstory?? For Cash?? Ohhhh its that fucker. Cash is the guy who- oh ok it’s all coming together

HELP THE CHAOS

YOOO LION AKUMA HELLLL YEAH

I’ve always thought his akuma was sick as fuck

HAWKMOTH DIED/??

HELP SO MUCH IS HAPPENING ROSE CALLED AND- GTVNBUREFI

Ok so my suspicion that Adrien will find out has dimmed, but the embers are still there. Maybe he’ll be vaporized. 

Yeah maybe now isn’t the time for impromptu therapy ladies

Hell yeah, Panthera for the emotional intelligence win you go girl

Oh no it went wrong, Fei running away from your problems doesn’t work this is an awful time to do that!

No because Fei literally challenges Marinnettes ideals of a good person, her black and white way of thinking about things has been a (interesting!) source of conflict throughout this but i don’t believe she has ever disagreed with someone in this way that she actually likes. Idk if this makes sense, basically what I’m saying is this could be an interesting way to develop her black and white view on good and evil

I have feelings about it all ok??

“I can’t think about this” YES YOU CAN LB

I’m curious when Juleka will use that power again, also what is it called?

HELP NO i am actually out of breath from how much i laughed at Juleka picking up the phone for Rose WHILE CLIMBING WHATS HIM NAME SHADOW OF THE COLLOSUS STYLE 

GIRL. HAVE SOME PRIORITIES. 

WAIT IWIAIT WIH3W

WHAY

WITA

JULEKA CALLED HER SUNBEAM? ISN’T THAT WHAT SHE CALLED ROSE AS PANTHERA OR AM I GOING INSANE

WAIT. ROSE HAS A CLUE NOW? I’M GOING INSANE CAP

CAP PLEASE

I HAVE BEEN WAITING FOR THE ROSE-JULEKA REVEAL FOR YEARS

WHEN. 

Sorry i went mad

In my head when LB was flung off the big guy she pinwheeled through the air silly style

Is. is fei just flying about crying? “A mournful cry” and “red and gold streaked above them” like. As a bird i think that counts as flying about for the fuck of it and sobbing it up real style

It has been. A week maybe more. Sorry got distracted read 1.4 mill for another work got way too invested, we are so back though

And back to Fei’s POV epic crying girl montage qued

“And it was all her fault” girl please, there is a dickhead called HM and I think it’s more his fualt than yours, get over yourself

The renlings are so cool, the dialogue you had them do was mega cool cap

Dragon renling is bad ass, personally i would name them. He is now dubbed; Daniel.

Damn move over Juleka, there’s a new therapist in down, his name is Daniel the Dragon

Oh thank fuck, when Daniel said forgive i was like bitch Cash doesn’t deserve that, but forgiving herself makes so much sense. 

Not Panthera offering to fix her makeup- Juleka is so sweet girl

“We’ve got your back, Fei.” Ladybug exclaimed, “L-Like; If you need a plan, I’ve got one. I’ve got a great plan. I just need a GIANT jug- this made me lose it. What the fuck LB what would a giant jug do pray tell

YEAH DRAGON TIME

Sorry, that piece about her dad was lovely and it was awesome to read, it swept me up so i just ended up saying dragon time

Hm how does the dragon speak if it doesn’t have lips (in my head) 

No because ack what is this plan that involves a giant vase. Panthera you go girl don’t let her get eaten by another akuma, the dinosaur was enough. What will they do for Feast if not be eaten though that is the real question

Ya girly Fei just kicked kaiju ass in under 5 minutes because their timers were going off so, current MVP of the series; Fei, followed by Juleka for her metallica moment

Aww Mei Shi is adorable

He's so nice help

WHERE DID HE GO

Also wonderful break POV, that was a good line

Get his ass gang, cash is a dick

MEI SHI IS ADORABLE YAYAY AND SMALL

Fei has like 13 friends now. Is there 12 renlings or no i can’t remember

“Ooh sounds yummy.”

“You sounded a lot more professional as a robot guardian guy.”

“I was. Now I’m small and terrible.”

“Joy.” I LOVES HIM SO MUCH HE IS SO BABY!!! If only they returned to Paris with LB and Panthera, he could be friends with plagg.

Juleka now has a favor… 

Oh yeah plagg realised he could leave the ring while Juleka is transformed. That feels like an important detail. 

“OH MY GOD I HAVE PARENTS.” i love marinette. I loved this whole interaction actually, “water under the bridge, forced under the bridge” and all that was really funny

Also the fact that Adrien didn’t know your not allowed to sleep with a concussion has me concerned. 

Oh yay!! Juleka and Fei ‘therapy’ session

“That’s our everyday Ladybug!”

“AHA. YEAH. THAT SAYING. LANKS ADRIEN. I MEAN THANKS LADRIEN. THANKS. ADRIEN. AHAH.” realest reaction to that

The ending was very cosy, lots of fun :3

Finito!!!!!!! Amazing chapter Cap, ten out of ten, no a hundred out of ten is more fitting. I look forward to what comes next >:3

DANIEL I’m wheezing

I’m so glad you enjoyed bud! I’m gonna try and keep Fei in her lane for the rest of the fic or else my favoritism will show.

as for Panthera’s “special mode”, that’s called Mass Obliteration!

Plagg leaving the ring while Panthera is transformed is a marker on how much experience she’s had being Panthera.

When characters are transformed, they absorb that Kwami’s power to wear the suit. Then they expend a lots of that magic to use their powers and if they’re young and haven’t used that miraculous much- or don’t have lots of magic in general- then that magic is pretty much depleted to nothing once that power is used and their battery runs out after five minutes.

The Kwami is like the power source to the holder’s battery/charge, with the miraculous being the chord between them. Usually you need them “plugged in” aka in the miraculous at all time when the holder is transformed. However! Panthera’s gotten so used to Plagg’s essence that even if he leaves the ring for a bit, she can stay transformed as she has a bit of his magic to naturally spare. I hope that makes sense I’m babbling. Thank you to my buddy @ghostatjoes for that lore.

The base was in the original Shanghai episode. Ladybug’s plan was to get vored and break the akuma from the inside. It had organs. Mei Shi had organs. I was so disturbed, I didn’t wanna write that— and also I felt like Ladybug overhauling Fei’s fight was wrong. That was HER villain yknow. Wanted Fei to finish it all by herself.

I’m glad you enjoyed! This was def one of my favorite chapters ever to write. I think the size is an obvious indicator. I hope you guys enjoy Season 3! It’s coming I swear. I’m just writing a fun chapter before I drag you all into my hole of hell that I’ve been stewing over for years.

[pumpkinsy0]

could you please write how the curtis/shepards gang would react to papercut getting homophobic comments when they’re out together

ALLLRIGHT SO☝🏽☝🏽

the shepard gang ill say has mixed reactions??? let me make it clear that i think most of the shepard gang deals w toxic masculinity, some of them r homophobic, some of em rlly aint, but i dont rlly think theyre coming to their defense!! if tim SAID so, yea if course but thats inly bc 1) hes their leader, what he says goes 2) i dont think tims that kinda guy (ill go into depth bout that later) 3) i dont think they rlly care for curly like that to beat someone up for him on their own accord yknow??? to them, curlys the equivalent of a nepo baby!!!!

so while not all of em is exactly homophobic, i dont think they think highly enough of curly to care and some of em would join in on it, they dont rlly gaf bout pony

w tim, id say he does care, but a few of the reasons r more selfish???? like yes he cares for curlys image, but also his own rep. and then when it comes to ACTUALLY doing something about it, i cant see him going outta his way to actually beat someone up for JUST that, like yea hes mad about it, but he would honestly just keep that in minda and have one big planned attack for the countless other stuff the person did, when it comes to tim, i feel like just the idea that tims mad w em would already kinda spook em

is angela part of the shepard gang???? technically shes an unofficial member so ill add her here<333 dont rlly need to think much about this one, shes def getting her revenge for curly, shes the kinda girl who wants karma immediately

nowwwww when it comes to the curtis gang!!!

i think they all address the issue in their own way

two bit/soda/johnny- not interested in fighting them as much as they r interested in making pony feel better and secure in himself

darry- hes not gonna fight the person, cant rlly afford to and hes not that kinda guy, would try to teach pony to just shake it off, but the problem is hes seen as #theemasculinestandard, so he doesnt understand that its harder than hes saying it is, hes not saying its EASY, but hes making it seem easiER

now when it comes to dally, steve, and two, i could totally see them not VENTURING out for the guy, but if they bump into em, they cause problems in the name of pony🙏🏽🙏🏽

im srry this took so long i was busy😭😭

[tomboyyyaoi]

Vashwood thematically feels like two starts orbiting each other very closely, while Vashmeryl is like a planet naturally orbiting a start or large force of mass. Like they both are about two people revolving around each

i see u and if u dont mind me pulling off this to make it much more essay-ish than it needs to be,

for me it feels like vash has 2 sides to his character and both wolfwood n meryl are there to understand each of those sides

wolfwood relates to and resonates w his more "monstrous" side, theyve both seen hell and come out with completely different views but despite that they still are probably the only two who really Get eachother for that, just feeling too big for your skin and that theyr only deserving of loneliness, but they find eachother and they click because they fit more in with the monstrous, evil, barely human people of nomans land who want to see it burn and theyr always pulling themselves from comfort and happiness because they feel they dont deserve it and they need to atone for the people who Made them, but they find it in eachother whether they mean to or not until the very end. they even became so enamoured with eachother that when wolfwood died, in a sense, he joins rem in vash's head as someone to fight for and someone who shapes his reasoning, he only kills legato to save livio because wolfwood died for livio, just like how rem died to save everyone so then anyone dying would be a waste of her death

for meryl she sees herself in the more human side of vash, despite all hes been through he still smiles like its nothing and she knows damn well thats not normal and hes hiding his pain because hes still a person. when vash kills legato he breaks down completely she holds his head in her lap and thinks about how she did the same when she first killed someone because its such a human reaction, something the people of nomans land seem to have forgotten. theyr horribly terrified to get close to eachother because she knows hes not human, she knows what hes capable of and shes absolutely got issues herself with being emotionally closed off and for vash we know he punishes himself by not allowing himself simple comforts as well as the fact he knows hes a danger to those around him but theres still a person in there and meryl sees it and vash knows she does and is so relieved that Someone does but theyr both too traumatised to get close but by the end of the manga we start to see them perhaps warming up to the idea of being closer

you can even expand further on this with wolfwood's status as a victim of the narritive by watching how all the gungho guns are picked off one by one (besides livio) including knives and wolfwood because thats vash's whole reason for not just giving up and living a quiet human life as eriks, wolfwood (and knives, and the rest of the gungho huns) dying can be read as vash losing his need to be a monster, and while it pains him to see his partner and brother die its like that inhuman part of him - or the need to use it - dying too, which can also be seen in his hair turning black, and whos still there by the end when his hairs fully black and theres no threat forcing him to be a monstrous angelic saviour to the world? meryl - his humanity. we dont really see much of him living as human (such as allowing himself to grieve, recover, love, eat, sleep, form bonds, laugh, smile, be happy) before the series ends but i love that it lets us fill in the blanks

anyway uhh TL;DR wolfwood brings understanding and comfort in vash's inhumanity and meryl reminds him of and encourages his humanity

[tabithatwo]

HONEST QUESTION by why do u think no one (until shauna did at their fight) ever called jackie out on being oblivious to other people’s feelings? Like we all know jackie is never mean on-purpose nor does she ever want to cause any harm but there are times where she has no idea that she is indeed doing so.. or is somehow influencing that.. And its like why has no one else ever tried voicing this out to her? BC we can clearly see she would’ve done something to change her behavior if it was pointed out. I just dont get why no one tried to other than the fact that it was probably just pretty privilege or people just being too scared to say so

WELL okay this question really got me thinking lmao my answer is sort of twofold so walk with me here…I don’t fully think jackie IS oblivious to other peoples feelings and I don’t think people have any issues calling her out when she misreads tone. The people who do tend to snap at the others when they say stuff that annoys them—off the top of my head shauna (obviously lol), tai, nat, mari, and van—all do at jackie at some point.

I think in canon, with the group as a whole, jackie is actually very in tune with their emotions. She corrals them at the kegger and they genuinely react positively. I think she’s honestly extra in tune with people’s emotions, perhaps partly because has to work a little harder at things. I think that’s why she’s captain.

When I say “off” in my original post, I mean that I think people can sense the way that someone picks up on and addresses behavior (aka loading time/processing/trying to problem solve when that isn’t what’s desired/etc) more than I mean that jackie is saying shit that upsets people regularly. I think that, other than shauna, jackie doesn’t upset them much more than anyone else until later in the season when things get bleaker.

Once they’re in the woods, jackie has lost her entire social script. It’s funny to me how people say she was the enforcer of society, because really I think society has kicked her ass and she’s simply learned how to exist within it and doesn’t know how to adapt to change. This isn’t the setting she’s used to, she doesn’t know how the people she’s learned and adapted to will react to these things, because who the fuck does?? It’s now unpredictable and she’s just really lost in a compounding way. We see her actually cheer people up again when things fall back into a script that she has access to—the seance, doing mistys makeup for her, etc.

As far as shauna goes, she has NO problem letting Jackie know when she’s upset with her lol. She just gives her no clue why. Shauna doesn’t communicate her feelings with anyone really and she certainly doesn’t delve into big picture things. (There’s a tai shauna tangent here that I’ll go on one day but besides that relationship, shauna is really just closed off and expects people, especially jackie, to read her mind.) Shauna snaps or gives the cold shoulder and Jackie adjusts and readjusts, until she’s fixed it the best she can.

I think that shauna’s reaction to being called out for cheating with jeff is something that greatly colors a lot of peoples’ views on jackie, when really it says a whole fucking lot more about shauna herself. Shauna is a horribly fucking unreliable narrator. We see her get confused and forget what her own lies are when she’s fessing up to callie about adam. She was writing her own narratives and letting resentment build even before the crash. So to me, taking what shauna says during that fight at face value, over what we actually see of jackie and their relationship, is a mistake. Shauna’s backed into a corner. She’s caught out. Little miss I’m with homeland security, first panic instinct is to lie is going to make shit up. She was trying to hurt jackie. That was the goal. For a myriad of reasons—I love shauna shipman don’t get it twisted lol. (And we see jackie realize shauna is tying to hurt her. Jackie tries to hurt back for a bit and she sucks at it lol and then she slips back into shocked hurt.)

So anyway, yeah. I think shauna clearly felt overshadowed, but she just does. In general. All the time. We got to see that in 2x09 when she spells it out for us in her journal lol. So using this scene to read jackie as someone who actually does the things shauna is accusing her of feels like a big jump to me.

Shaunas feelings were real. But I don’t fucking think shauna hated soccer. I don’t think jackie ever actually pushed her into her shadow, unintentionally or not. I think that jackie couldn’t navigate shauna’s emotions in any way other than placating when she could and trying to cling to her, because she was constantly terrified that shauna would leave her. Why did jackie expect shauna to go to rutgers? Probably because that’d been their entire fucking plan and jackie had no way of knowing that shauna didn’t want that anymore. I’m gonna talk more about their fight one day when it isn’t a tangent on a different topic lol, but basically I think reading what shauna says in the fight as truth is a common and inaccurate take.

To the last point, I think prettiness definitely impacts a person’s life on like every scale and makes people overlook things they might not normally, but I don’t necessarily feel like jackie got off with no feedback basically. And I don’t think she was actually that hurtful. I’ve talked about the nat situation here and how it’s unique, but that isn’t jackie being oblivious, that’s jackie trying to get an outcome. She is clearly oblivious sometimes (when she tries to give a pep talk post insane leg breaking lol, when she tells travis about who nat has hooked up with, when she is pragmatic about things like rationing food) but really she rarely says overtly hurtful shit, even on accident. She does less so than the other girls.

So I think it all comes back to that thing that a lot of viewers do—view jackie as fake. The fact that she doesn’t really give any evidence of meanness sort of was my point. Even when there is nothing bad said, general social awkwardness can be taken as an indication of insincerity. I think this is sometimes especially true when someone is overall decent at masking, at least enough that they’re superficially seen as well liked. Because then people see a hiccup (which is really an adjustment to new input) and take it as an intentional behavioral change.

(Grain of salt, I am someone who had a keen fucking interest in being as pretty as possible at her age lol, to the degree that when I was asked how I got so good at “beauty stuff” I said “well, you can be weird if you’re hot enough!” Until I learned that was actually NOT the answer people were looking for of course lmao so I am close to the subject of performative attractiveness to skate by and I also know that it only tends to cover more superficial likability—aka homecoming queen, but you’re only got like 1-2 close friends and your teammates have no issue giving you bizarre looks when you miss the mark lol)

Thanks for the ask, clearly it got me thinking. Like a lot. Many tangents and I’m not even sure how well I addressed the questions lol but I don’t feel like going back and making it more focused so this is the ramble we get!! <3

[weebastic]

Wind breaker Ep 1

Yeah so my reactions to the ep as it goes on as i write my physics notes, also how do you add emojis on here ?

this is a creeepy starting but whatever lessgoo

seems like our mc is the local loner but you shall see through this incredible journey we shall find out the power of friendship cue mlp soundtrack, look there can be a lot of movies and media about friendship but none of them can beat the og mlp. OK LETS SEE HIM FINDS FRIENDS BY FIGHTING.

my parents when i want to colour my hair

first opinion he should be in mashle

girls are so pretty just like look at them ugh

your mom bro

YOOO WOW MC REVEAL THE NEW TODOROKI SHOUTO but this guys obsessed with power

HELP WHY IS HER FACE LIKE THAT, its like god i jumped from one idiot to another alternately my friends when i do random shit

i love their dynamic already it would be better as a polycule with dumb and dumbest with a side note of done with this shit

I AM 5 MINS IN AND AM ALREADY RELATNG SO HARD TO HIM LIKE HES SO BABYGIRL I CANT I WANT HIM AND I WANT TO BE HIM GOD

THSI DYNAMIC MELTS ME GIVE ME FOOD AND ILL GIVE YOU THE WORLD

BABY HAD A GOOD INTERACTION WITH ANOTHER HUMAN im waiting for him to get sick like zuko when he got a fever from doing something good

THEYRE SO CUTE I FEEL LIKE SHE JUST ADOPTED HIM AS HER BROTHER OR SOMETHING. She just took one look at him and was like yeah hes about to starve or somethng bqwxguchg

SHES SO HOTTT LIKE OMG

GUYS CUE MLP BGM WERE GOUNG FREINDSHIP IS MAGIC but srs though shes right this is called gang wars wheres your gang buddy where your homies to back you up

GUYS FORGET EVERYTHING calling a short person a cat is the ultimate insult i have first hand experience

I really dont understand this like baby needs to get on tiktok or smth within an hour he'll be called the next big thing atleast 300 thirsty messages will be in the comments and dms like srs ???

Next is an awesome fight scene but whenever i paused it to get a screenshot it came so wierd

WHAT IS THIS SCENE LMAO IF IT WASNT SO STRESSFUL I WOULD BE WHEEZING ON THE FLOOR BUT YAY OUR OTHER CHARACTERS ARE GETTING INTRODUCED

OK all in all episode was so good and the animations too like which studio is this you guys are damn good,ill move on to the second ep

Sakura has entered the top 10 ranking of babygirls