#or rather not
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“I’ve just upset the entire history of the future,” said Mort. “Yes?” “You see, when he tried to kill her I killed him, but the thing is, according to the history she should have died and the duke would be king, but the worst bit, the worst bit is that although he’s absolutely rotten to the core he’d unite the cities and eventually they’ll be a federation and the books say there’ll be a hundred years of peace and plenty. I mean, you’d think there’d be a reign of terror or something, but apparently history needs this kind of person sometimes and the princess would just be another monarch. I mean, not bad, quite good really, but just not right and now it’s not going to happen and history is flapping around loose and it’s all my fault.”
Mort (Terry Pratchett)
This is what it looks like, when fictional history's written by a person, who knows a thing or two about the real one, and doesn't care to preach about morality instead.
#Discworld#Mort (book)#Terry Pratchett#Mort#Princess Keli#books#quotes#history#Death (series)#V#Seeing Grishaverse in other works#or rather not
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Sometime at work, my boss handed me an envelope, which I proceeded to open while walking to my office. Dissatisfied with essentially ripping it all unevenly using my hands, I decided I should do the reasonable thing and grab something shaped much more akin to a letter-opener than my index finger.
Passing through a colleague's workspace, I, not thinking much (or at all, indeed), spotted an antique rapier on a rack, took it, and sliced the envelope open in one perfect cut.
Pleased with the result, I put the rapier back and was just about to exit the room when all of a sudden, I heard the bemused voice of my colleague: "I have scissors, too, you know."
It honestly had not crossed my mind to simply ask my colleague to borrow their scissors. That long, historic stabby stick with the sharp edges was perfectly suited to the task, after all. I feel obligated, however, to remind any of you Gentle Readers not to try this at home, please.
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thought: occurrs
me: oh no not this stupid extra feature again
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(Not) WIP Wednesday
Thank you @lemonlyman-dotcom, @carlos-in-glasses, @bonheur-cafe, @thisbuildinghasfeelings and @cold-blooded-jelly-doughnut for the WIP Wednesday tags. I have opened multiple WIP's and stared at them and I just...cannot find words lately. Loved seeing what you're all working on and hope to have things to share in the future!
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so once me and my wife were watching a documentary where a snake ate like a million eggs. that snake just went to fucking town on eggs. and the snake made the eggs look so good that i kept thinking about it, and thinking about it, and thinking about it, and eventually it was 11pm and i ran out of willpower and decided to eat one (1) singular raw egg just to prove to myself that the snake was surely a liar.
the snake was not a liar. texture is like, super important to me and raw eggs are very Texture so i had another one, and then another one, and then another one, and eventually i ran out of eggs.
i had like, fifteen raw eggs.
i didnt really know how to explain this momentary madness to my wife, so my Plan was to put all the eggshells into a grocey bag, and then throw that grocery bag in the dumpster, and if she never noticed that would be Excellent and if she noticed immediately i could lie and say that the eggs went bad.
except i cant lie very good, and of course with murphys law being such, i got salmonella.
so i threw up a lot and my wife asked me what poisoned me so and i tried very hard to dodge the question but i was oozing shame like oil from a room temperature cheese and eventaully i gave in and told her everything and to her enormous credit she was more flabbergasted than actually upset. she did make me promise to not eat any more raw eggs, which i have stuck to, and she gives me weird looks during nature documentaries now as if desire was the only thing keeping me from eating thousands of pounds of krill anyway i made a joke earlier about being able to eat my age in eggs and my sister in law in law made a drawing to comemorate the moment and also because it was my birthday. she's excellent. thank you 10000000% @cintailed. you should all visit her page and admire her work.
#i feel a kinship with that snake#would that i could be a simple tube#and eat my fill of eggs#but being a person is rather nice too#my wife is a saint#and i promise that most of the time she is the goblin and i am the Serious Guy#but i had a little pique of insanity and you know what it was my junior year of college#and i deserved to just go a little insane#you spent 65 hours a week being Rational and then you go home and eat like twenty raw eggs
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https://nationalpost.com/news/canada/theyre-not-human-how-19th-century-inuit-coped-with-a-real-life-invasion-of-the-walking-dead
Indigenous groups across the Americas had all encountered Europeans differently. But where other coastal groups such as the Haida or the Mi’kmaq had met white men who were well-fed and well-dressed, the Inuit frequently encountered their future colonizers as small parties on the edge of death.
“I’m sure it terrified people,” said Eber, 91, speaking to the National Post by phone from her Toronto home.
And it’s why, as many as six generations after the events of the Franklin Expedition, Eber was meeting Inuit still raised on stories of the two giant ships that came to the Arctic and discharged columns of death onto the ice.
Inuit nomads had come across streams of men that “didn’t seem to be right.” Maddened by scurvy, botulism or desperation, they were raving in a language the Inuit couldn’t understand. In one case, hunters came across two Franklin Expedition survivors who had been sleeping for days in the hollowed-out corpses of seals.
“They were unrecognizable they were so dirty,” Lena Kingmiatook, a resident of Taloyoak, told Eber.
Mark Tootiak, a stepson of Nicholas Qayutinuaq, related a story to Eber of a group of Inuit who had an early encounter with a small and “hairy” group of Franklin Expedition men evacuating south.
“Later … these Inuit heard that people had seen more white people, a lot more white people, dying,” he said. “They were seen carrying human meat.”
Even Eber’s translator, the late Tommy Anguttitauruq, recounted a goose hunting trip in which he had stumbled upon a Franklin Expedition skeleton still carrying a clay pipe.
By 1850, coves and beaches around King William Island were littered with the disturbing remnants of their advance: Scraps of clothing and camps still littered with their dead occupants. Decades later, researchers would confirm the Inuit accounts of cannibalism when they found bleached human bones with their flesh hacked clean.
“I’ve never in all my life seen any kind of spirit — I’ve heard the sounds they make, but I’ve never seen them with my own eyes,” said the old man who had gone out to investigate the Franklin survivors who had straggled into his camp that day on King William Island.
The figures’ skin was cold but it was not “cold as a fish,” concluded the man. Therefore, he reasoned, they were probably alive.
“They were beings but not Inuit,” he said, according to the account by shaman Nicholas Qayutinuaq.
The figures were too weak to be dangerous, so Inuit women tried to comfort the strangers by inviting them into their igloo.
But close contact only increased their alienness: The men were timid, untalkative and — despite their obvious starvation — they refused to eat.
The men spit out pieces of cooked seal offered to them. They rejected offers of soup. They grabbed jealous hold of their belongings when the Inuit offered to trade.
When the Inuit men returned to the camp from their hunt, they constructed an igloo for the strangers, built them a fire and even outfitted the shelter with three whole seals.
Then, after the white men had gone to sleep, the Inuit quickly packed up their belongings and fled by moonlight.
Whether the pale-skinned visitors were qallunaat or “Indians” — the group determined that staying too long around these “strange people” with iron knives could get them all killed.
“That night they got all their belongings together and took off towards the southwest,” Qayutinuaq told Dorothy Eber.
But the true horror of the encounter wouldn’t be revealed until several months later.
The Inuit had left in such a hurry that they had abandoned several belongings. When a small party went back to the camp to retrieve them, they found an igloo filled with corpses.
The seals were untouched. Instead, the men had eaten each other.
#being so English you die of racism#because youd rather eat each other than a seal#or try to signal to the friendly locals that you need help#many such cases#UNIRONICALLY#the terror#the franklin expedition#dorothy eber#then they infected all these people with European disease of course#the national post is a chud rag so this is an unexpectedly good article for them
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I turn to Ares.
Thanks to Tyler Miles Lockett who allowed me to draw inspiration from his ARES piece for page 2! Look at his etsy page it's SICK
⚔️ If you want to read some queer retelling of arturian legends have a look at my webtoon
#greek mythology#ares#athena#greek gods#dont get me wrong it aint athena slander but it sure is ares praise#on some level at least#man justly accused of bad things deserves some mid praise more at 11#thank you romi for helping me with words though i duly noted you insisted on ares not being cautious rather than him not being careful#romi be like “i want him to care” and honestly good you should say it#also EPIC led to this and i just..... i want to draw some animatics man i just need infinite time now#my long lost love for greek myths just will never stop coming and they dont stop coming and they dont stop coming#i want some vulture design in here for ares but not sure about this one#kochei doodles
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can’t stop thinking about my friend’s cishet partner who said last night that he doesn’t think anyone is the same gender. god-tier take.
#sky.txt#we were talking about how some people conceptualize nonbinary as like a 3rd gender#rather than a huge spectrum of experience#and he just hit us with that
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License to Kitty.
#dungeon meshi#izutsumi#marcille donato#chilchuk tims#I still stand by my tags on the Izutsumi character study piece I did in January - but I will repeat myself on a few lines here:#I *really* love this character. I love that all of the dungeon meshi crew are complicated and have difficult to love components.#But Izutsumi is a particular kind of hard to love. I foresee a lot of people being turned off by her abrasiveness and lack of teamwork.#She is very self-centered and openly goes against what the party agrees on.#She's a picky eater in a story that is 50% about eating good and healthy food!#It is in part about her growth but admittedly even *then* she remains rather true to her self-centeredness.#Even though she isn't as nice or funny or compassionate as the others...Izutsumi is still someone worth loving.#Even the more difficult people are someone worth loving.#And those people in turn are people who have something and someone they love.#She may be a girlcat but she is the most human of them all.#I hope that if you are an anime only watcher and are feeling put off by her at the moment; you'll give her a chance.#By the way: *yes* I worked very hard to draw that skateboard pose. It was worth it.#EDIT: HAPPY 500th POST OF POORLY-DRAW-MDZS!!! What a comic to commemorate the milestone with!
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i am a being capable of immeasurable love and whimsy
#and also. am a ilittlel kitty :3#mine#cats#brain empy. felt tip cats ONLY#we were promised snow today n then they decided actually :) rain all day for u#i bought new wool for a cardigan today im SO excited its gna be so colourful#i was going to do some sort of Thing on the back like a heart or something but im still too scared to do colour changing stuff#maybe....maybe next time#i think i will try a patter w like. an actual grid with it first rather than just rawdog it#bc i . do not know what im doing :3
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...weird amount of dunmeshi fans have been saying being a caretaker in a relationship is the worst thing ever..marcille must want to killl everyone soo bad because doing things for people suuuucks sooo muchh
it's an act of love, not just a job i promise. we all want someone who's willing to take care of us in some way, just like how senshi shows care for others by cooking for them :'|
#marcille donato#dungeon meshi#dunmeshi#laios touden#falin touden#chilchuck tims#izutsumi#delicious in dungeon#this is also about kabru and mithrun stop focusing so hard on how it was ‘forced upon’ kabru as if it’s the most evil thing in the world#they took care of EACH OTHER during that time and mithrun wasn’t doing nothing#people are so weird about him and reduce mithrun down to his disability as if he isn’t CAPTAIN for a reason#it’s sooo insane#try thinking about how their time together serves the themes of the story rather than a biased interpretation#of all the things that happen in this manga people focus on the weirdest things to apply to real life#people try to construe is as something evil with evil intent as if it’s not there to benefit the THEMES of the story#woah a huge...heron? just landed on a tree i've been staring at it for like 10 minutes its pretty#dungeon meshi spoilers
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I could get over anything as long as I have something new to be obsessed with
#without a silly book or show or comfort movie idk where I would be genuinely#like I’d rather just be entirely consumed rather than self aware today thanks
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Tell me you know nothing about history without telling me you know nothing about history
#'turned him gay'#newsflash asshole he's been gay (bi rather) the entire time!#alexander the great#history#to clarify this is a reaction to the tweet#I don't know anything about the documentary itself or how accurate it is
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Wenn du die Depression nicht als eine negative Einschränkung siehst, sondern als DROLLIGE Charaktereigenschaft, dann ist sie zwar immer noch da, aber die Leute gewöhnen dich dran.
Man ist halt dann der immer, mürrische Kerl mit dem pechschwarzen Humor.
Lieben wir~
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