#or maybe the fact that I've worked for various religious places

[thetimetravellercat]

.

[silverskye13]

I adore all your hels stuff! What other ideas do you have about some of the other helsmits, maybe the ones mentioned in your interview? Like, Hels!Stress was pretty interesting. Plus Joe and alive Cleo.

I'm mostly all vague ideas except for the stuff that finally gets written down and tossed here, but I can give you a list of my many vagueries if you want! Various helsmets and world-building under the cut. It's a very long post.

Some baseline world-building I've got figured out:

First thing's first: we're all going to have to cope with the fact that in my head, hels looks a lot like Bloodborne. I'm sorry. I don't know why I'm like this either. Now that that's out of the way--

Hels are a phenomena not exclusive to Hermitcraft. Any SMP could have a hels, or an evil double or mirror image or whatever-you-wanna-call-it split from them and spontaneously spawn one day in hels. Hels is a world with no overworld, it's all nether all the time, and a pretty miserable place to be. It's not impossible to live there, but given just about everyone is made up of the worse/discarded traits of someone better, people tend to be harsh and mean first and make friends later. The Deep Dark exists in hels (because I think it's fun) but its up by the bedrock ceiling. This makes sense because hels is a mirror of the real world, and also the Deep Dark would probably exist as far away from the light lava provides as possible, I figure? So it's by the bedrock ceiling.

All hels denizens are destined to two paths in life. Either you become one with your other half someday, or you set yourself so far apart from your other half you become your own person. I figure because of this, hels has a lot of religious undertones? They're a race of people grappling with the idea that any day, one of them could just stop existing. That's something you've got to cope with actively if you're going to cope with it at all. There are a lot of churches in hels [loosely churches. if it's vaguely philosophical and you can put it in a building, it's called a church. some are actually religious, some are just a little spiritual, some are thinly veiled fronts for criminal activity...]

Some noodling I've done with helsmets:

Evil Xisuma: Xisuma's helsmet, but they've been independent of each other so long there's no way they'd ever become one person again. Evil X has limited access to creative mode and uses it solely for selfish gain. Being the only person with god powers gets boring though, and he's long exhausted his tantrums of raining TNT on various parts of town just to see what'll happen. Now he spends most of his time sulking in his tower, being melodramatic and vaguely evil, and occasionally making formal speeches.

Helsknight: A very active member of the community and a big fan of vigilante justice. He is either the most popular or least popular helsmet, depends on what side of his law you fall on. He is very dedicated to the church that hosts his knightly tenets. When he isn't threatening everyone who looks at him funny and moonlighting in the shadow of his church, he hones his swordcraft in a coliseum, which is my justification for the rap lines "Everyone lives in fiery cells" and "I'm their greatest champion so ring your warning bells" in Diabolical. He's a champion, he fought his way through the coliseum. Any knight worth their metal started in the cells there and worked their way up.

JoeKills: He doesn't live in hels, he was forcibly exiled for disturbing the peace shortly after he first spawned. It's one of the handful of times Evil X has ever had to ban someone from hels. He spends most of his time leaping from world to world, enacting mild-to-extreme terrorism and vigilante justice on anything that doesn't match his world view - mostly to the tune of tearing apart large corporations brick by burning brick. He hates JoeHills with a fiery passion, and heaven help the both of them if they ever meet in person. I'm on the fence if I think they could ever be one person again. They're both so unhinged, their coming together would probably kick off the apocalypse.

Alive!Cleo: She's a mob boss who uses a church as a front. It's a very thin front and most everyone knows what's up, but she's scary so no one does anything about it either. She runs a decent chunk of the east side of the Main Hels City I Haven't Named Yet And Probably Won't. Her and Hels come to blows often. She, like Evil X, has defined herself from Cleo enough they could probably never be the same person. It was mostly unintentional. She needed something to do, she figured out she loves her work, she's building an empire. HumanCleo is the big picture planning to ZombieCleo's impulsiveness. Where Z!Cleo rushed The Red King at Dogwarts and died, H!Cleo would've found a way to join Dogwarts to tear it down from the inside. H!Cleo is also terrified of dying. Doesn't matter that respawn is a thing you can do in hels. As far as she's concerned, this is a hardcore world and she's winning.

Hels!Stress: She says "lovely" instead of "gorgeous". She wears all black instead of pink. She thinks her hermit is adorable but in that patronizing way a villain thinks the hero is adorable when they first meet. That's not to say Hels!Stress is evil. She's just very aware of how competent she is. She gets things done and she does them easily, unflappably. She has a larger-than-life reputation. Did you hear she once wrangled a ghast and used it to break through the bedrock to the ceiling above? Did you hear she growled at the Warden and it ran away? She fought ten warriors in the coliseum with one arm tied behind her back and won. Most of them are probably lies, but people have witnessed enough of them in person to wonder how many are truths - and she definitely starts some of the rumors herself just to see how far they balloon out of proportion. I kinda wanna call her FinesseMonster.

Docm77: His hels doesn't exist. Undecided on if he existed once and doesn't anymore, or if he's just never existed. If he did exist though, I think he would be a Doc who actually follows through. Listen, Doc does a lot of grand standing. He's scary until you dare him to flinch, and then 9 times out of 10, he flinches. If Doc had a hels, he would be quiet, and whenever he spoke, he would always follow through.

Grian: Pesky bird! I kicked around the idea that Grian's hels would be a Watcher, just because I never do Watcher takes seriously. I think it works with Grian as a player, since he's very active and engaged with the world he's in [hermitcraft]. So a helsmet who watches and manipulates would actually be very good for him. Bonus points for the fact that Grian is a bit manipulative himself. He's known for pushing buttons. A hels who observes and only ever quietly points out when you're giving in to your faults would be insidious in how close it is to your personal thoughts, especially when they grow so close to you, their voice is identical to your own. How much of this is intrusive thought and how much of this is just voice? How long has it been since you were able to tell?

FalseSymmetry: [I've read before that her hels would be TrueSymmetry and I think thats amazing, lets keep that]. Anyway, I think her hels would be scary, or would be based on the idea that people think False is scary. False is a lot like Etho in that her reputation precedes her, but compared to her inner voice - her videos - she's actually very nervous and a bit bumbling. It's just that she's quiet in a somewhat stoic way when it comes to competition, that gives her the reputation. So I think TrueSymmetry and FalseSymmetry are a lot alike. Visually they're very similar. Their voices are almost identical. But while False is quiet because she's nervous, True is quiet because she really is stoic and intimidating. I think she takes a lot of pleasure in pointing out to False when people are scared of her. I imagine when Tango released the withers in the nether, and he laughed nervously and said, "Well hey we only need you, right False? You can take on three withers all on your own." True was a little voice in the back of her head saying, "See? He's scared of what you're capable of. You're going to hurt them all someday... or let them down..." False insisted they wait until Grian could come and help as well.

Iskall85: Iskall and his helsmet are also a lot alike, but where Iskall broke away from his "official hitman status" and started pursuing other things like building and redstone, his helsmet never left the life. There's is a mirror that reflects two choices in life, a splitting point where Iskall's life could've gone much differently. They don't dislike each other, but they do regard each other with a lot of sideways glances. Someday they will be so different they'll be unrecognizable. This is the best chance for both of them to survive the fact that they are hels and hermit. It takes a lot of restraint to end a friendship with your reflection. Years of progress will be undone if one of them breaks and looks back too long.

The Red King we've mostly heard of! And what little I have left on him I'm keeping to myself for if I write him more.

Tanguish is also pretty thoroughly revealed.

VintageBeef is a blood god as a hels. Because I love that for him. Very eldritch entity, The Slaughter from TMA. He has a public face he barely holds together. He likes to emulate his hermit in order to scare people.

Noodling I've done with hels denizens that aren't hermits:

Vaugely I think Dream and DreamXD are probably hels doubles. No idea which is which. I don't follow DSMP enough.

Pixlriffs: The King of Pixandria has a hels! He thrives in a place with such an affinity for spirituality and death. I fell like while Pixandria Pix had a healthy respect for death and honored it, shepherdly almost, hels!Pix views death as a cruel inevitability.

The Mad King of Mazelea: He has a hels as well. I haven't gotten much farther than a vague Red King-ish figure but with more wildly swinging moods.

LDShadowlady: You cannot tell me in every incarnation of Lizzie in her many SMPs that she's not her hels' best friend. That seems like her kind of chaos she's be very on-brand for. They drive each other deeper and deeper into shenanigans, constantly egging each other on. It's like playing chicken but instead of driving two cars towards each other you're both driving for a cliff and you're both definitely not stopping until you've driven off it.

[gardenerian]

Absolutely no pressure to actually write it obviously (I know how it is lol) but what are your ideas for that S8 re-write? 👀 I just like hearing your thoughts

whew! i don't have any concrete storylines in mind, so if i ever did it i'd have to really sit down and plan it out. it would wind up being very ian-centric but would anyone really be surprised by that? but hmm here are some random thoughts i've had about it:

ian would not get all Weird about trevor. idk if trevor's even still around in this, unless it's for an official break up. i'd let him have a little more self-respect in my s8 😇 and no chub bar.

and we would not forget mickey exists ✨ ian will think about him, and i think even talk about him with lip - but probably no one else bc he doesn't want to risk mickey's safety

might extend the monica storyline beyond the third episode - maybe focus on that as the catalyst for an episode rather than the shelter. there would still need to be a conflict with the siblings i think... something to take the place of fiona/ian and the church.

so i don't know what is it is, but something that alerts his siblings to the fact that something isn't right... but i think they'd still likely miss the severity of it till it's too late - but IDK what happens??

ian's still feeling alienated, especially in the wake of losing mickey again... maybe that brings around some repressed trauma from the first time around... tips him further over the edge?

but i am still thinking there would be a religious element to this episode - maybe he's looking for something in the wake of losing both monica and mickey... how you can do everything "right" and still lose? maybe he's even inspired by saint francis aksjdhf and he starts exploring ways to find meaning...

so he's working as an EMT and studying various religious texts/probably attending services of some kind (but it's NOT a JOKE unlike the "real" s8)

and maybe this sparks that god complex and starts the delusions... something about healing and saving and ??? idk

i am not sure how it all comes together.... bc while i understand jail as a method to write cam off and bring mickey back... and while i LOVE prison boyfriends.... and i understand it as a consequence for the van... i do not want to write that 😌

so idk something happens, ian has to deal with the fallout? does he lose his job? does he get arrested still? maybe there's some time in jail or a hospital for whatever reason, i don't know!!!!

AT THE SAME TIME, i would start working on getting mickey back earlier. do i know how? no! do i know why? also no! maybe he somehow hears from ian and is like "???!!!!" i simply do not know. but i would give him a whole ass storyline on getting back. maybe he still rolls on the cartel and gets time served.... i don't know!!! but he gets back home and finds ian... well. ian's a fuckin mess.

then what happens? who knows! especially not me askdfh i just want to make gay jesus disappear 😇

BUT it's more thoughtfully written than s8 😡 and it doesn't make of mockery of everything ian has been through 😡 that's all i got 😡

[viridiave]

Daylight Prairie- Creatures of the Light (lore dump)

I've had a couple of theories and headcanons stirring around my head regarding Prairie for a while now- so right here we're gonna tie some of them together cuz I haven't lored in a good long while XD

Note- btw I'm not part of beta so this is purely just me- a crackhead- putting together a crackpot narrative. SOME spoilers for Eden are present.

<THE CEREMONIAL WORSHIPPERS>

okay these guys drive me fucking nuts

We barely know anything about these guys- and what little we do know is derived purely from their closed off uh... Worshipping space. Look at this freaking thing.

In the middle of nowhere. Surrounded by clouds for miles. Fairly advanced diamond technology. Altars with graves decked out in gold and candles. The mechanism for the entrance to the elevator to begin with is fairly complex as well- activated by butterflies and the butterflies don't even die in the process. And to top everything off, this place has a portal that leads directly to the Prairie Temple.

If this isn't sus I don't know what is- but I think I have an explanation.

There are six spaces for six more people that we are not aware of. The only people we DO know of is one bald person in the short garb and another bald person in the long garb. I propose that these six missing people are the Whisperers.

Which is... pretty out there, I know. Counting the 'voices' that we get in game, (including the ones from previous Seasons like Lightseekers and Sanctuary) we have one for Birds, Whales, Mantas, Memories, Crabs, and Jellyfish. For now, we're not counting either Butterflies or Krill- and I'll explain why in a bit.

As for the initial proposition that these Whisperers are the missing six, first we need to ask ourselves what exactly it was that the Worshippers were... worshipping. There is a possible god of which we see in game, and the name of this god is the Megabird.

Megabird here was heavily present in concepts, and in the final product we only ever get to see traces of her and heck to this day we're not sure if she's a canon entity in the final game at all. Megabird as an entity in the concepts is basically the god overseeing the world of Sky and is comprised entirely of light. It's unclear whether or not the Ancestors were aware of her existence after or even before the King rose to power. The Elders themselves are likely privy to this information, but somehow I doubt that it's something anyone wanting to assert control over their people would encourage.

There's certainly the possibility that these Worshippers were a religious sect dedicated to the Elders themselves- but since I'm here trying to propose that they're worshipping something tangential to the possible actual god, we're going to assume this isn't the case. On that note-

<THE WORSHIPPERS WERE DEVOUT TO LIGHT ITSELF>

I propose that the Ceremonial Worshippers valued the Light above all else- and this worship was extended towards the light creatures themselves.

'Oi. Vir. Crabs are DARK Creatures.'

Not all of them. Heck, a dark crab might not have been the norm back then, but that's a stretch and besides- the fact is that these crabs on the far end of Sanctuary are docile.

Keep in mind that these followers were stationed in Prairie, of all places. You know what else is in Prairie? Sanctuary Isles- home to several kinds of manta, butterflies, jellyfish, and even the elusive Elder Manta (yes that's what the big chonky boi that looks like a light krill is called- it's not a whale.).  Daylight Prairie is in no shortage of light creatures- and at the center of it all is its Elder.

Prairie Elder is implied to have responsibilities toward the light creatures as presented in the SkyShop poem featuring them:

'Fields of harvest, prairies of joy.

Farmer and fauna as one.

The Elder protects the creatures of light,

For darkened days to come.

Fly up, fly away,

For the Children of Light in need.

We shall recall our days of wonder,

And feel its air once more.'

-SkyShop Poem (Prairie Elder Pin)

In the greater context of the story, Daylight Prairie is the primary source of light energy in the form of the light creatures- it makes sense that the Elder of that realm would oversee the flow of light creatures from one realm to the other, and that the Ancestors in their domain would have a greater respect for the creatures than others. They're the ones working with them, and they're the ones that know them best.

Enter the Worshippers- who were likely serving directly under the Prairie Elder. I'm not confident that the Prairie Elder could have shared information about the Megabird- or if they even know the god existed. 'The Light itself' is pretty vague for something to be worshipped, and it's possible that the Prairie Elder instead encouraged people that the Light manifested itself into the various light creatures that we see.

In this world however- industrialization marches on, and eventually these light creatures became things to be harvested rather than worshipped. It's speculated that light creatures were used in the production of diamonds- we see signs of this scattered throughout Forest, and Wasteland by proxy. The mural under the bridge in Forest and the doors to the Temple seem to suggest as much at least. Eventually, this industrialization will grow out of hand. I have a few theories on what the Prairie Elder might have done to passively rebel against this.

<PRAIRIE ELDER AND THE BUTTERFLIES>

We learn in the Prairie Elder's cutscene that they are able to form- not summon- butterflies from fire. I'm not proposing that the Prairie Elder is single-handedly responsible for the existence of butterflies- rather I'm proposing through the Prairie Elder's abilities that light is able to be manipulated in such a way that one can create light creatures, should they know how.

It could just be the butterflies, honestly. And really it could just be the Prairie Elder that's capable of such a feat- and because of these holes in this theory it's the first to go.

And yes this is the reason why the Butterflies don't count. I think. That has holes too and I can make a case for the Butterfly Charmer technically being part of this... But I digress.

<SANCTUARY ISLES>

Sanctuary Islands could be a literal Sanctuary for the light creatures- there is an impressive variety of them present. It's also very out of the way, tucked away in a corner of Bird's Nest. The theory I'm proposing here is that the Prairie Elder and the Sanctuary Guide worked together to keep this place hidden from the rest of the Kingdom- and that it was the Sanctuary Guide that broke the bells that would have granted the Ancestors access to the light creatures.

<THE WORSHIPPERS DISBANDED>

This is... probably improbable, but my whole post was leading up to this so we're doing this. The missing six Worshippers are the Whisperers that we've encountered throughout the game- leaving in order to either develop their relationship with or protect their creatures of choice.

The Bird Whisperer stayed close and remained in Prairie- and is probably the reason why Bird's Nest exists at all. The Jellyfish Whisperer remained as well, opting to stay in Sanctuary- the natural habitat of the jellyfish.

The Whale Whisperer ventured to Forest- where there probably once was a small population of Whales, given the corpse we see in the Bridge Area and the live Whale in the Underground Cavern.

The Manta Whisperer went to Valley- I'm guessing to see how mantas were being used for labor and competitions? And Valley is right next to Wasteland so I might be reaching but they could have been monitoring that too.

The Crab Whisperer is a tricky one because we see them travelling with the Lightseekers, and yes I am proposing that this lady was formerly a Worshipper. But because we're dealing with a creature that we now know is more dark than light, maybe the Crab Whisperer joined the Lightseekers in order to observe that phenomenon more closely? Because she does refer to the crabs as friends in her SkyShop poem. Wasteland wasn't always a... wasteland, after all. Things could have been different, and the crabs could have been adapting in a time where they would be relatively dangerous but not so much that an Ancestor couldn't approach them.

And then there's the Memory Whisperer. For this one, I don't think a spirit manta actually exists- at least, not as an organic creature and moreso just an interactive holograph courtesy of the machinations of Vault. I'm actually not too sure on what this person could have been doing, but they have a call- and my best guess is that the Memory Whisperer is one who listens to the last vestiges of light leftover by a creature- because we do see skeletons in Vault, and one is of a creature that looks like an amalgamation of several spirit mantas.

<WHY DON'T THE KRILL COUNT?>

As far back as Prophecy, Krill don't appear to be aligned with the light. They aren't depicted as former light creatures, nor a corrupted variant of an elder manta or whale- they are presented as thenselves in that Prophecy mural. Though I'm sure we'll get a Krill call later on, I'm not going to count them until then.

<CONCLUSION...?>

This huge post is... full of holes and heavy speculation, I'm aware. Mostly I just wanted to dump a bunch of shower thoughts and leftover lore I came up in the Discord lore chat. Go check it out sometime, I've derived a few points in this from interacting with people there. I'd love to hear your thoughts on this matter, by the way- it's fun theorizing! I haven't done this seriously in a long while.

[ggukachuwu]

Chapter 1 | Guardian of Gold | Jeon Jungkook

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Pairing: jeon jungkook x f!reader

Genre: fantasy, alternate universe, illegitimate heir! jk, witch descendent! reader, angst, fluff, dual dimensions, magic, strangers to lovers

Warnings: nothing, except for mentions of the grandmother acting strange and the fictional use of various religious/spiritual practices for a fictional spiritual practice.

Synopsis:

In a world adjacent to our own, long lived the Guardian of Gold.

During your summer vacation, you decided to spend it with your quite eccentric grandmother. However, when you get there a series of strange events, odd dreams of different dimensions, and late night escapades with an illegitimate heir to some magical throne start to haunt you after you get your hands on an old book you found under the floorboards of you grandmother's home. Or was it really a dream at all and your grandmother has been hiding some dark and gruesome secrets that has followed your family for centuries?

or

"WHAT DO YOU MEAN I'M THE HEIR TO POWERFUL WITCH BLOODLINE FROM ANOTHER DIMENSION?!!?!?!?!"

A/N: sorry for the wait between the prologue and chapter 1 ahaha. I've been kind of busy lately with work and other things. Also, I won't be using any Korean honorifics in this fic just because I don't want to misspell anything. Jungkook should be introduced in Chapter 2!!!

Your grandmother had been acting odd when you had arrived at her home a day earlier. It was almost like she was hiding something from you based on the way she seemed to hold you at arms length.

Granted, your grandmother had always been rather odd.

As a child, you remember watching her prance around her home chanting in some language that sounded made up.

Even the blessings or talismans she would regularly give to you and your cousins when you visited were different than what your friends would get from their grandparents. Your friends had always said it looked like she was giving you curses.

Of course, you didn't like that. You considered the things your grandmother gave you to be precious and they always gave you a warm tingly feeling that you would describe as happiness.

But regardless of how she's always been, this time was very different than what you were used to.

And that may be due to the fact that you were an adult now and not the wide-eyed child you once were. You were a grown woman who matured and wasn't so childish anymore, something your grandmother probably wasn't used to.

Still, her behavior made you feel odd.

The next day, while your grandmother was visiting a friend of hers, you stayed at the house.

You had spent most of the morning alone in silence, well...more like asleep. Lunch time was when your day started. You took a shower and ate some food.

You groaned, flinging the arm that was resting over your eyes to the floor. Oh, how incredibly bored you were. Your grandmother had been gone for a few hours and you weren't sure when she would be getting back. There was absolutely nothing to do in the house and it was so quiet.

"Ugh...what should I do?" you mumbled to yourself as you stared up at the ceiling.

After a few minutes of staring blankly into space, your eyes focused on something in the uncovered rafters. A tiny piece of what looked like the corner of a piece of paper stuck out just slightly from the rafter above you.

Curiosity filled your mind and bones like wandering ants, so you jumped up to find a stool to reach the piece of paper.

Unfortunately, the stool is just a little too short for you to be able to reach the piece of paper and you have to stretch on the toes of one foot to be able to reach it.

Your fingers brushed the piece of paper, wiggling it so that it falls off the beam. It flutters down into your hands, landing softly. The piece of paper is tinted a yellow-tan color, probably from age. It's crumpled and creased in places.

The piece of paper is actually bigger than you thought it was at first. Since it was crumpled up it looked smaller, but it's about A5 size.

As you opened up the paper and flattened it, you noticed the fading ink etched onto it.

The words written were an older form of Korean that you had a bit of trouble reading, but you were able to make out what seemed to be directions.

Under the floorboards near the alter lays the key to our success.

The directions were odd to you. Key to what success? You didn't understand.

Regardless, you went to the one place you could think of: your grandmother's prayer room. That was the only room with an alter.

In that room she kept the shrine that was dedicated to passed family members. It was also where she kept the books of your family history and everything about what exactly it was that she practiced.

You entered the room. It had a nice smell, likely from your grandmother's morning prayer where she lights her incense sticks and candles.

There was also a bit of fruit sitting on the alter and a glass of water. An offering to your ancestors. Pictures and nick-knacks rested on the table top, an apple or orange resting in front of each one.

Near the alter, under the floorboards.

Under the floorboards.

While holding the piece of paper delicately in your hand, you shuffled around the room near the alter looking of a loose floorboard. It took a bit of time, but in the corner next to the window, a board creaked and wobbled when you put your weight on it.

You had been trying to pry the floorboard up for the past thirty minutes, it felt like. You just couldn't get your fingers under it enough to get it up.

What could you do?

Standing up, you looked around the room. There was nothing that would be of use to you, except maybe something on the alter, but it would be disrespectful to your ancestor and grandmother to use anything on there.

Next you made your way to the kitchen in search of a spatula or something flat enough to get under the board.

Luckily for you, you had hung the spatula over the sink so it could dry after you washed the dishes you used to make your lunch.

You snatched the spatula and flung of any of the excess water still on it and swiftly went back into the prayer room.

Crouching down, you shoved the spatula in between the floorboards, praying that you wouldn't ruin it, and angled it just enough to get it to catch under the loose board to pull it up enough to get your fingers under it.

With a bit of creaking from nails coming out of their holes, you were able to lift up the loose board.

It was dark under the floorboards, so you pulled your phone out of your back pocket and turned on the flashlight.

There, at the very bottom of the hole, sitting on top of the dirt foundation under the house, was a wooden box. It had a dark wood stain, black metal hinges, and black embellishments.

You used your flashlight to look around the hole for a moment longer, just to make sure nothing was going to jump out at you and bite you before reaching down and pulling the box out of the hole.

Thankfully, there was no lock, just a little latch to keep the box closed.

You sat back and crossed your legs, resting the box in your lap. With a deep breath you glanced at the piece of paper that lead you to the box.

Under the floorboards near the alter lays the key to our success.

Who was the "our" the paper referred to? Your family? And success in what?

With a slight tremble in your fingers, you unlatched the box and lifted the lid.

The contents of the box was not what you expected. In the box was a single book, an old one, for that matter. It was made in a traditional book binding style, with yellowing pages, and curling edges.

You picked the book up, setting aside the box it was once contained in. You turned the book over in your hands, examining it. There was nothing really special about it. You weren't sure how this was supposed to be the "key to success."

The inside of the book was written in an older version of Korean, much like the piece of paper was, but thankfully you were still able to make out the gist of what the first page said:

The Guardian of Gold and the misfortune he caused for our kin. His reign must end and his empire must fall.

[unicornprincessinthetardis]

My (often relatively reasonable) dad: ...so Enoch Powell was right, what he said has happened.

Me: and you don't think maybe he could've said it without inciting racial hatred and literally saying that in time the rivers might run with the blood of 'native' British people because of immigration, do you?

My dad: no, you're being ridiculous, it had to be said, and there really are areas of cities that are majority black or Muslim now so he was right in his predictions, and it didn't change how things were anyway

Me: *goes away to calm down and read up on the 'Rivers of Blood' speech*

[I already knew some of this but here's a précis for those unfamiliar: in April 1968, in Wolverhampton, UK, a Conservative MP, Enoch Powell, made a speech, about the proposed 'Race Relations Bill' (which subsequently made it illegal to refuse housing/ employment/public services to people on the grounds of race/colour/ ethnic & national origins).

The speech was strongly anti-immigrant, calling for 'voluntary re-emigration' and for moves to be made to stem the tide of immigration, else Britain would be 'overrun' and sooner or later white British people would find themselves fully second-class citizens, and that in some ways they already were. He also talked about a "tragic and intractable phenomenon which we watch with horror on the other side of the Atlantic", which I take to mean immigration in the USA to the similar end of white people no longer being in charge - which in 1968 was so far from the truth, and just horrible baseless fear-mongering, playing on people’s xenophobia and racist prejudice - and compared pro-immigration/anti-discrimination newspapers to the ones that had denied and hid the rise of fascism and threat of war in the 1930s. Plus, he talked about a constituent of his, a woman who lived on a street that had become occupied by mostly black people, who lost her white lodgers and complained to the council for a tax rate reduction because she wouldn't take black tenants, and instead basically got told not to be racist, and presented it as a bad thing that she'd been treated like that.

The speech's common name comes from a phrase he quoted from the Aenid (because he was also a Cambridge-educated classics scholar), 'I seem to see "the River Tiber foaming with much blood"', although he just called it 'the Birmingham speech' and seemed to be surprised by the uproar he caused.]

Me (to self): So it didn't change things did it? How do you explain the attacks against nonwhite people where the attackers literally shouted his name and repeated his rhetoric? Oh, they would definitely have happened if he hadn't made that speech, wouldn't they? And the British people of foreign descent who were so afraid they might be removed from their lives just for not being white they always had cases packed to go? And the fact that experts says he set back progress in 'race relations' by about ten years and legitimised being racist/anti-immigrant in the same way UKIP and some pro-Brexit types have done within the last few years here (fun fact: immediately after the Brexit vote, people were being racially and physically abusive to visibly Muslim and/or South Asian people, telling them to leave because of Brexit, which was of course extreme nonsense because their presence would be nothing to do with the EU, and more likely the British Empire and the Commonwealth, but they were doing it because it seemed suddenly okay to be openly racist, because Nigel Farage and his ilk, and a legally non-binding vote surrounded in lies, said so) and others have done elsewhere, in the US and Europe and Brazil and so many other places.

Powell was interviewed about the speech in 1977 and stood by his views, said that because the immigration figures were higher than those he had been 'laughed at' about in his speech, he was right and now governments didn't want to deal with the "problem", were passing it off to future generations and it would go on until there was a civil war!

He also said he wasn't a 'racialist' (racist) because he believed a "'racialist' is a person who believes in the inherent inferiority of one race of mankind to another, and who acts and speaks in that belief" so he was in fact "a racialist in reverse" as he regarded "many of the peoples in India as being superior in many respects—intellectually, for example, and in other respects—to Europeans." (I mean, I know I can't hold him to our standards but a) that's still racism and b) he did think that mankind was divided into very distinct, probably biologically so, races, which, yes, normal for the time, but the whole 'each with different qualities and ways in which they were better than others' is iffy)

Me: *goes back to Dad to make my point and definitely not get upset* So here are some things that literally happened as a consequence of the 'Rivers of Blood' speech...

So even if he was correct to say what he did (I mean, he wasn't but you have to tiptoe around Dad and I had points to make), he shouldn't have said it the way he did

My dad: so you think the truth should be suppressed? You're only looking at this from one perspective (he thinks he knows better because he was alive at the time and my brother and I weren't despite the fact that we're both into politics and history and, y'know, not into scapegoating, behaving oddly, and laying blame because people are different to us - he and mum also have issues with trans people and we're trying so hard to change their views/behaviours but I'm not sure it's working & that's a whole different story) and there are these areas that really are Muslim-only (because informal lending and wanting to keep the community together is such a crime, right?) and they don't integrate and want to impose Sharia law (only he couldn't remember what it was called right then) and you don't know what it's like (he is an engineer surveyor and travels all over to inspect boilers and cooling systems and all sorts of stuff, and this includes into majority-Black or -Asian (Muslim and otherwise) areas in Birmingham - which is not a no-go area for non-Muslims, I'm a deeply agnostic white woman, it's my nearest big city and I wish I went there more often but it's tricky as I don't drive, public transport is bad/inconvenient, and I have no friends to go with except depression and anxiety [which are worse 'friends' than the ones that I found out only liked me in high school because I always had sweets and snacks at lunch so when I got braces and my mouth hurt too much to eat much of anything which meant I certainly didn't have snacks, they dropped me pretty quickly] so apparently he's the expert on all such matters)

What I wish I'd said: *staying very calm* well, and that's your opinion, I'm going, I've got sewing to finish *leaves*

What actually happened:

Me: have you considered that they are able to buy up areas like that because white people leave because of their prejudice against the 'influx'?

Dad: they buy up great areas because they buy in groups (I think this refers to a sort of community lending thing to be compliant with various parts of Islam? [Please correct me if I'm wrong] which is effectively what building societies/credit unions were, at least to begin with, and he doesn't take issue with those) and want to stay together. Why do they do that? Sikhs don't do that, they buy big houses and aren't bothered about being close together.

Me: different religious ethoses? I don't know... But you do know that they people who want the UK to be a caliphate ruled by Sharia law are just a minority, and that most Muslims would not want that at all, just like you?

Dad: but they still do want it, and it could happen, if there was a charismatic leader,

Me: *incredulous* you know it's about as likely for that to actually happen as for strictly Orthodox Jewish people to be able to make this country into another Israel, right? Besides, there are the police, and the armed forces, and intelligence agencies, not to mention the Government and civil service (thought I'd got a win there, he hates the unchanging upper-class-public-school-Oxbridge nature of the people who effectively really run the government, constant no matter the leaning of the elected party, but no) who have a vested interest in preserving themselves in their current state so would be able to stop anything like that

Dad: yes, but the cutting of funding to police and public services means they might not be able to stop it (I realise now that he's oddly economically left-wing but also really quite socially conservative in some ways)

Me: *getting angry* but it's still an absolute minority, most Muslims would be horrified if it really did happen, and have you ever considered that maybe they wouldn't be so ill-disposed to us and to integration if we didn't demand it of them the moment that they arrive, demand that they assimilate or go away (he often uses the phrase "yes, but they're in somebody else's country, they should make an effort") and maybe young people wouldn't be so easily radicalised and people generally mistrust the people who don't try to understand them, you know, want them to change everything about themselves (for instance, Dad is violently opposed to the burqa etc and not really a fan of the hijab - still doesn't get that it's a choice and people can do what they want because apparently 'anyone could be wearing one of those things' - burqas/niqabs, I presume - and that it must all be forced because who would possibly choose to dress like that - I have half a mind to show him those sites about Christian modest dressing (one was a shop and a lot of their range was pretty cute!) that I once found, just to see if that'll prove to him it is a choice thing) *tries to leave*

Dad: *angry* You stay there and listen to me! You're just looking at it from one perspective and that's not the truth, you're so biased and closed-minded, you only look at things your way!

Me: *furious* Really? Really? Am I? *Scoffs/incredulous exhalation* I'm closed-minded, am I?... *Storms out, shouts as I go* I'm not the one who said Enoch Powell was right!!

This is all heavily paraphrased, because I've been writing this for literal hours now and I was angry and don't remember well at the best of times, it may have been worse than how I'm writing it

Also, going to be tricky to patch up but right now I stand by what I said, because I know my perspective is limited, but at least I actually admit that and try to find out what people different to me think, rather than basing all my opinions and things on my own experiences which can't be universal, as he seems to

Other bs my dad said during the two conversations: "don't get so upset about it, it's only history" (which is bold, considering it was the 50th anniversary this year and he was literally 11 years old when it happened so probably saw/heard news coverage)... "Yes of course far right groups use 'Enoch was right' as a slogan, it doesn't mean anything"... Reiterating the 'nothing changed' thing multiple times... Dismissing the fact that Powell said there'd be a civil war because apparently just because the British/Europeans were aggressive conquerors anyone else who came in numbers anywhere would eventually have that aim and how ridiculous that view actually is... Dismissing the fact that Powell basically incited racial hatred and violence with the inclusion of an irrelevant Classical phrase which spread fear on all sides...

I could go on but I'm so tired and don't want to make myself more upset

I love my parents but I really don't like them very much lately but I don't know if I just put up with it or leave sooner or later and if I do leave I don't know where I'd go because no friends

Basically I'm so sorry for my parents' prejudices which I'm still trying to unlearn myself - I apologise wholeheartedly to all Muslim and Jewish people and honestly pretty much everyone they're prejudiced against

[spiritroots]

Hi Yejide. Recently, I've been feeling a calling to explore root workin' and ancestral veneration. I've been raised Baptist and still maintain a relationship with Christ, but lately I've just been feeling this internal pull to honor my ancestors. I don't know exactly how or where to start. My entire life, I've been raised to believe that doing any kind of root work is witchcraft and inherently evil. How did you decolonize your mind and break out of that fear?

Hi anon (: Welcome to the struggle! I’m happy for you that you’re feeling the ancestral call, and I hope some of this very long response (+1.4k words, I counted lmao) is helpful in one way or another. 

First off, I want to emphasize a couple different things. For one, hoodoo/rootwork is NOT the same as witchcraft at all. It can be overlapped with witchcraft and/or it can be referred to as a form of witchcraft by black folks who wish to call it that, which is a perfectly valid, personal terminology choice. However, historically, rootwork/hoodoo derives from the various ATRs (African traditional religions) that were practiced by black slaves brought to the US. 

ATRs are not witchcraft either, they are traditional religions practiced by peoples indigenous to Africa that deserve the same amount of respect as any other religion in the world. The negative stereotypes about them are based on racism and attempts to dehumanize African peoples and their descendants in the diaspora who practiced their ancestral traditions. Any time you start to slip into that way of thinking about ATRs, remind yourself that they are religions as deserving of respect as any other religion.

Most African slaves in the US were forced to practice various denominations of Protestant Christianity and abandon their traditional religions or face severe punishments - even death. Hoodoo/rootwork is largely the result of many different practices and beliefs from ATRs combined together and syncretized with Christianity. It is a folk magic tradition that was developed not only during slavery but also largely within the black church. The ties between hoodoo and Christianity are very deep. You don’t have to be Christian to practice rootwork, but it’s not at all un-Christian to practice it either if that’s something you’re interested in doing. (Since you mentioned you still maintain a relationship with Jesus, I figured that might be something you’d wanna look into.)

The majority of traditional rootworkers in the US have always been and still are Protestant Christian. It’s traditional in hoodoo to pray to Jesus during workings, and it’s said that Moses himself was the very first rootworker in history. Why? Because the original Christian rootworkers viewed rootwork as powerful prayers, asking for the help of God to heal, protect, and sometimes issue divine judgment. Hoodoo wasn’t traditionally seen as witchcraft at all, and in fact, has long been used as a method for fighting against witchcraft. Many of the most respected and famous rootworkers in history were also preachers and pastors. Some consider being a good church-going Christian as a pre-requisite to being a rootworker. The Bible itself, especially the Book of Psalms, is traditionally viewed as a powerful source of hoodoo magic.

Now, I’m not sure if you were already aware of any of this or if this information is helpful to you, but I think it’s important for anyone studying hoodoo to understand this side of its history whether you want to connect with these aspects of it or not. If you’re curious at all about my personal journeys of dealing with Christian views on witchcraft and also decolonization within my magic and religious practices, see the mini-novel I ended up writing at 3 am for this ask under the read more line below 😂😂😂

[ Ask me anything ] [ Buy me a coffee ] [ Spirit Roots Shop ] [ About Me ]

It took me about a solid ten years to get to where I am now with decolonizing my mind and breaking out of Christianity-related fears around magic practices. I’ll still always be in the process of decolonization for the rest of my life, but within the past few years, I’ve made some big strides that I’m very proud of for myself. As I hope most of my followers know, I’m not a witch and don’t identify as one for personal and historical + cultural reasons within the context of Africana traditions. BUT that being said, for much of my life I did identify as a witch and actively study witchcraft for a very long time.

I declared myself a Wiccan at the age of thirteen, which was inspired by watching Charmed, yes, but that didn’t lessen the seriousness of it for me as being an actual religious path and practice I wanted to commit myself to. Being an only child who told my very liberal parents everything, I quickly confessed this to them expecting acceptance and happiness for me. Unfortunately, their Christian knee-jerk reaction alongside concerns about a thirteen-year-old learning about witchcraft, fertility rites, and sex-related rituals was enough for them to give me an ultimatum to stop being both a Wiccan and a witch.

That sent me deep into secrecy about it for around a solid 8 years or so - essentially all the way through high school until I had more independence in college. During that whole time, I always felt like I was genuinely a witch and Wiccan and no other religion fit me, but I was too scared to practice because of my parents’ reaction and them having “banned” it. I remember that constant longing mixed with fear of being a witch in my heart while feeling like it would never actually be accepted by anyone in my life.

During college, I finally realized that I could practice it more actively without worrying about my parents anymore. I remember going through all the stages of testing the waters with that, the ex-Christian pangs of guilt and intrigue, the concerns about what Drew and my friends would think and then being the cool and edgy witchy friend after finally mustering the courage to tell them. It was like I could finally be who I always knew that I was inside, but it had required a long process of unraveling the shame and the guilt and the fear, too.

Now, to be totally honest with you, I wouldn’t consider ANY of that decolonization. That was really just my journey of breaking away from a mostly Christian upbringing (my Jewish roots didn’t really play an anti-witchcraft role at all tbh) and finding the freedom to more openly be a witch and deepen my practice of witchcraft and of Wicca. Beginning to decolonize for me was a whole other journey that started soon afterward.

Fast forward to after I started studying Wicca in enough depth as a college student that I realized it really wasn’t for me and ended up converting to Buddhism instead. In a roundabout way, it was converting to Buddhism that sent me down a very different path. I was and still am a very devout Buddhist, but even though the buddha dharma is universal, Buddhism as a religion is deeply rooted in Asian cultures which is not a part of my heritage. As my Buddhist practice deepened over time, so did my longing for ancestral traditions and practices. This is what got me started with ancestor work and studying hoodoo, which is what eventually led me to an interest in ATRs and Ifá in particular. Even reconnecting with my Jewish heritage and identity was a part of this journey to tap back into my ancestral practices and spirituality.

The more I learned about these Africana traditions, the further away I got from Eurocentric ways of thinking about spirituality and magic. Converting to Buddhism from Wicca began my big push away from Eurocentric frameworks, and getting involved with hoodoo and Ifá only cemented that even further for me. Yes, witchcraft can be defined in whatever way one wants so I’m not saying people can’t practice completely non-Eurocentric witchcraft - some people absolutely do that. But for me personally, leaving the concept of “witchcraft” and the identity of “witch” behind completely was even more liberating than reconnecting with it in the first place had ever been. This was a huge part of my personal decolonization process for many different reasons.

That’s all a very long story and explanation, but that’s essentially my point. It can literally take decades to undergo the personal journeys necessary for unraveling and growing beyond what you were raised to believe and what society impresses upon you. Growing up in a very Christian household and in a Western society that enmeshes you in Eurocentric ways of thinking makes it extremely difficult because that’s all your surrounded by for most of your life. 

Unfortunately, there’s no handbook or manual guide for all this. It’s very challenging and difficult. One thing I wish I had had more of through all of it was support from role models and mentors to understand better where I was going and where I wanted to end up. Maybe if I had, these journeys might have been a bit shorter and smoother. If you can, find communities and mentors who can help you grow, but also always listen to your instincts and your own intuition. I wish you the best of luck on your way

[ismael37olson]

I've Been a Sinner, I've Been a Scamp

A lot of musical theatre fans love Anything Goes, but consider it a guilty pleasure, the artsy equivalent of Mississippi mud cake, just a mindless, old-fashioned musical comedy confection. They register great surprise when I describe it as a sharp satire. But it is. Musical comedy had dealt in gentle social satire since the beginning, but Anything Goes was the first successful Broadway musical comedy to build its story on two parallel threads of fierce, pointed satire. This time the plot came out of the satirical agenda, rather than the satire being just a fun side joke. I've written a lot about the neo musical comedy, which emerged in the 1990s as one of the dominant musical theatre forms. A neo musical comedy involves the devices and conventions -- and usually the full-out joy -- of old-fashioned musical comedy, but with a more socio-political, more ironic, and often more subversive point of view. Think of Bloody Bloody Andrew Jackson, Bat Boy, Urinetown, Heathers, Something Rotten, The Scottsboro Boys, Cry-Baby; but there were a few examples even earlier, like Little Shop of Horrors in 1982, The Cradle Will Rock in 1937, and really, The Threepenny Opera in 1928. And arguably, Anything Goes in 1934. Anything Goes was a dead-on satirical chronicle of That Moment... which also happen to be This Moment. Maybe we're just too used to Anything Goes at this point, to see it as it once was. But this is a show that includes a mock religious hymn to a (supposed) murderer, skeet shooting with a machine gun, a love song that mentions snorting coke, and a parody religious revival meeting featuring a song with a slyly sexual hook line. If you doubt the double entendre of "Blow Gabriel, Blow," this is the same songwriter who wrote in the title song, "If love affairs you like with young bears you like..." That meant then what it means today. And notice in the scene leading up to the song, most of the confessions are sexual. Reno is presented as an explicitly sexual presence from the beginning, so her spot as lead singer / evangelist, and with her randy angels as back-up, it's hard not to read the song as sexual double entendre.

In comic counterpoint to that, the language of the "Blow, Gabriel" lyric is Religious Symbolism as a Second Language. This is an amateur, or more to the point, a religious outsider, leading this revival meeting -- with the help of the fake-minister "Dr. Moon." It's obvious neither of them are really believers, and that doesn't seem to bother the crowd a bit. And by the way, why do we want Gabriel to blow his horn? The Bible says that "an archangel with the trumpet of God" will announce the Second Coming, and people have assumed that's Gabriel, particularly since Milton made that connection in Paradise Lost. During the Depression, many American believed that they were living through the "great tribulation, such as has not been from the beginning of the world until now, no, and never will be." (Matthew 24:21) So riffing on that, Reno and her angels (I think we're supposed to assume this is one of their regular numbers) pray for the archangel to signal the end of the tribulations (Prohibition, the Depression) and announce with his trumpet the coming of Christ. Reno assures Gabriel she's ready to "trim [her] lamp," a Bible metaphor meaning she'll work at and maintain her faith (to keep oil lamps burning brightly and consistently, you have to trim the wick back), that she's mended her ways (we can only guess what those ways included), that now, "I'm good by day and I'm good by night." Of course, that line assumes that Reno hasn't always been "good by night." But these "sinners" aren't asking for forgiveness or anything; they just want to "play all day in the Promised Land." It's a remarkably crass take on the Book of Revelation's thousand years of peace and righteousness. And all this to jazz music, until recently considered the devil's music... In one section, they all chant:

Satan, you stay away from me, 'Cause you ain't the man I wanna see! I'm gonna be good as the day I was born, 'Cause I heard that man with the horn! Do ya hear it?

Once you really pay attention to this lyric, you realize this section is all about the End Times. They want to be good, because Jesus and Judgment Day are coming soon! One of the more subtle jokes in the show is in this song, when the women take the melody and the men sing "Swing Low, Sweet Chariot" in counterpart, also a song about angels taking "me" to heaven. Since this is the male passengers and crew singing this counter-melody, are we to read that as spontaneous, that religious fervor is taking them over? Since this is always a big, involved, full-company, Broadway musical comedy dance number, it lays on top of our fake revival meeting an even more cynical layer of comment -- religion really is show business. But there's even more swimming around in Anything Goes. When the show opened in late 1934, Prohibition had ended just a year earlier, but the Depression rolled on, and the Dust Bowl kept destroying lives. The FBI was at the height of its notoriety, but the public loved some of the gangsters on the FBI's Most Wanted list (which is the whole point of "Public Enemy Number One"). Importantly, the FBI -- standing in for law and order in general -- is not on board the S.S. American. In fact, they arrest the wrong guy at the beginning of the show, and leave the ship! They're not up to the job. They can't/won't protect us. Was this a comment on how hard it was for law enforcement to catch America's celebrity criminals, John Dillinger, Baby Face Nelson, Bonnie & Clyde, et al.?

Here on the S.S. American, we are in Shakespeare's metaphorical woods, away from laws and civilization, where two things will happen. First, love will get "fixed" as our characters de-couple from the wrong partners and re-couple with the right partners. Second, with lots of liquor and very little "law," these passengers are free to act on their impulses, to chase after various forms of vice, to be their "natural" selves. And notice that the ship is called the "American" -- this place of no rules and no law is 1930s America, where (until a year earlier) lots of Americans broke the law by drinking alcohol. When that many Americans broke the law, when they stopped believing in the institutions that failed them, America became functionally lawless. By calling the ship the S.S. American, the show's writers were underlining their social commentary. As a comic microcosm of our country, these passengers showcase the worst of the American inclination to make celebrities out of criminals and show biz out of religion, an inclination as prevalent today as it was in the thirties. But the satiric aim is more pointed than just those two overarching themes. So what else does Anything Goes satirize? A lot. Even though economists will tell you the 1929 stock market crash did not "cause" the Depression, it was still the starting pistol, and most people in 1934 believed rich Wall Street types were to blame. Notice that in Anything Goes we have two representatives of Wall Street -- the drunken, horny, nearly blind Mr. Whitney, and the shit-disturbing rogue Billy Crocker. The name Crocker comes from the French for "heartbreak." In this story Wall Street is decidedly undependable.

Richard Whitney had been the very famous president of the New York Stock Exchange and during the 1930s, he was famed for steering his clients through the treacherous waters of the Depression. But his success was a scam of the proportions of Enron and Bernie Madoff, and he was finally caught in 1938 when his firm collapsed. Still, as audiences watched Anything Goes in 1934, Whitney was the hero of the rich, so naming Billy's boss Whitney -- and making him a drunk -- was a pretty subversive reference. According to Wikipedia:

On October 24, 1929, Black Thursday, Whitney attempted to avert the Wall Street Crash of 1929. Alarmed by rapidly falling stock prices, several leading Wall Street bankers met to find a solution to the panic and chaos on the trading floor of the New York Stock Exchange. The meeting included Thomas W. Lamont, acting head of Morgan Bank; Albert Wiggin, head of the Chase National Bank; and Charles E. Mitchell, president of the National City Bank of New York. They chose Whitney, then vice president of the Exchange, to act on their behalf.  With the bankers' financial resources behind him, Whitney went onto the floor of the Exchange and ostentatiously placed a bid to purchase a large block of shares in U.S. Steel at a price well above the current market. As traders watched, Whitney then placed similar bids on other "blue chip" stocks. This tactic was similar to a tactic that had ended the Panic of 1907, and succeeded in halting the slide that day. The Dow Jones Industrial Average recovered with a slight increase, closing with it down only 6.38 points for that day. In this case, however, the respite was only temporary; stocks subsequently collapsed catastrophically on Black Tuesday, October 29. Whitney's actions gained him the sobriquet, "White Knight of Wall Street."

It is a little weird that Mr. Whitney's first name is Elijah, coincidentally (?) named after the nineteenth-century inventor and arms manufacturer... The Harcourts (and Mrs. Wentworth, in the '34 version) stand in for America's "cafe society," the 1% of 1934. In the original version of the show, the Harcourts' family business was in serious trouble and needed saving, which was the reason for the arranged marriage. Is it any wonder Billy and Hope both would like to escape this culture? According to an article on the PBS website:

The Great Depression was partly caused by the great inequality between the rich who accounted for a third of all wealth and the poor who had no savings at all. As the economy worsened many lost their fortunes, and some members of high society were forced to curb their extravagant lifestyles. But for others the Depression was simply an inconvenience especially in New York where the city’s glamorous venues – places to see and be seen – such as El Morocco and The Stork Club were heaving with celebrities, socialites and aristocrats. For the vast majority the 1930s was a time of misery. But for many American dynastic families, parties helped to escape the reality on the street and the grander the better.

Parties and trans-Atlantic cruises. Many stories of the Great Depression show us the shattered and disenfranchised turning to religion in their time of need. But church attendance grew during the Depression only about five percent. Notably, no one aboard the S.S. American in Anything Goes has that spiritual need, and so for these people religion becomes show business, entertainment, the latest fad. Though the content of "Blow, Gabriel, Blow" is basically reverent, the song's rowdy, fast, jazz music quickly and comically short-circuits any hint of real religion fervor. This is religion as party. The only genuine symbol of religion we see in the show is the comically clueless Bishop Dobson, who's banished from this community (i.e.,mistakenly arrested) before the ship even sets sail; and all we're left with is the fake religion of fake-minister "Dr." Moon, and the gambling "Christian converts." Genuine religion (and conventional morality), the Baptist tent revivals and religious radio shows of the 1930s, are all missing from this place. Here there is no moral control -- it's Shakespeare's woods. In the 1930s, the 1960s, and also today, Dark Times bring forth the most pointed satire. Anything Goes opened halfway through the Depression, which also begat brilliant satires like Of Thee I Sing, Let 'Em Eat Cake, and The Cradle Will Rock.. The 1962 revival opened at the start of one of the most divided, angry decades in American history. The 1987 revival opened on the infamous Black Monday, the day the stock market crashed again. None of the show's targets feel dated, because we're struggling with all the same things now. Still today, religion is often repackaged as slick, high-budget show biz. When America's evangelicals strongly support the womanizing vulgarian and sexual predator Donald Trump, religion in America is on life support. And still today, we make celebrities out of criminals, and depending where the various investigations lead, Trump may be the best illustration of that too. Cole Porter's songs have all the bite, the sophistication, and the smartass humor of Ira Gershwin and Yip Harburg, but Porter's songs often bite a little harder, his lyrics closer to how people talk, instead of always just building toward a funny rhyme. Like those of the great George M. Cohan, Porter's lyrics sound like they could actually come out of the mouths of the characters. If his songs can often be transplanted from one show to another, that's only because many of his shows were about the same kind of people -- smartass, subversive, sexual, clever, ironic, complicated, and contradictory. Just think for a second about all the characters in Anything Goes that have contradictory impulses. Porter wrote both in contemporary slang and in genuinely elevated, powerfully poetic language when the moment called for it. His songs can be emotionally shattering and they can be icily cynical, about the most intimate insecurities or the most macro satire. Porter and his co-writers were writing old-school musical comedy, but they were also chronicling our times -- then and now -- most insightfully. It's so much fun working on this rich, crazy material. Long Live the Musical! Scott from The Bad Boy of Musical Theatre http://newlinetheatre.blogspot.com/2018/01/ive-been-sinner-ive-been-scamp.html