#or like... not get too close (hence him holding the grab handles) | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

blissfullyapillow · 1 year ago

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┃If I can’t have you.. (everything means nothing)

₊˚⊹♡ Xiao x fem reader

₊˚⊹♡ wc: 9k~

₊˚⊹♡ Prompt: Xiao finds himself falling for a human despite his better judgment, while said human is hesitant to give their heart to the sweet yaksha who saved them, in fear of becoming a burden.

₊˚⊹♡ warnings: slowburn, fluff, you’re visionless (gasp), tons of mutual pining, Zhongli acts like a parent figure to Xiao here (istg it’s so cute)

₊˚⊹♡ Pillow Talks: GUYS I AM SO PROUD OF THIS DFHUQI, I’ve been slowly writing the the last couple of weeks and I love how it turned out! I, once again, randomly got inspired when listening to a song. This time it was Shawn Mendes’ song, ‘If I Can’t Have You,’ hence the title of this work. I came to the sudden realization that the song would totally fit Xiao, and I realized it’s been a long time since I wrote something for him. I tried to make this as canon compliant as possible, as in Xiao would actually do & feel these things; I hope I did him justice! With much love, please enjoy this fic! Xoxo ♡(੭´͈ ᐜ `͈)੭

₊˚⊹♡ Masterlist

It’s an average night for the Vigilant Yaksha; Adeptus Alatus. Said adeptus is currently carrying out his duty as he watches over Liyue, defeating any man-eating monsters he happens upon.

Tonight there appears to be more of these monsters than usual, but it’s all the same to the mighty illuminated adepti.

He wastes no time in slaying said monsters, and within a moment's time they are all subdued.

At least that’s what he thought.

A sudden cry from afar immediately grabs his attention, and he wastes no time getting to the source. What he finds does not surprise him. A lone girl hesitantly backs away from a group of monsters, creating what distance she can as she inevitably becomes surrounded.

Xiao’s hand grips his spear as he readies himself to eliminate the threat in front of him. He falters when the lone girl emits a battle cry of sorts. He watches as she bends down to grab a..

A stick.

Xiao can’t help but snort at the comical sight.

This girl, all alone and surrounded by monsters, chooses a stick as her last means of survival. Almost as if the monsters can sense her foolishness as well, they emit sounds akin to laughter.

Xiao moves to help the girl, ready to save her, and yet…

He finds his feet glued to the floor when his eyes catch sight of her burning orbs.

Most people he’s happened across in these situations are full of fear as they shout for someone, anyone, to save them.

Not this girl. She straightens herself with her measly yet sturdy stick in hand before she starts to swing.

Xiao guffaws when she accurately lands a hit on one of the monsters. He’s flabbergasted when the small monster actually falls to the ground. He knows her stick won’t amount to much as a means of protection; it already looks like it’s on the verge of breaking. Despite this, she wastes no time in attacking another monster with her stick.

Xiao is rooted to the spot as he watches this girl miraculously handle herself pretty well in this situation. His sharp gaze flicks to the monster that creeps up behind her. He moves now, and in a moment’s breath he appears right behind said monster.

The girl has yet to notice the monster behind her as she swings her stick at another monster in front of her; the monster behind closes in on her from behind.

He’s relieved he’s close enough to stop the monster before it reaches her since she seems all too unaware of her surroundings.

So, imagine his surprise when the girl spins around, kicking the monster to the ground before his spear can deliver a devastating blow.

Their eyes meet, and although all she can see is his mask her expression morphs into one full of wonder and awe. That is, before she swings her stick at him.

Xiao easily catches hold of the stick, and in no time it snaps in two in his firm grasp. He ignores her attempt to hit him once more as he now focuses his attention on the remaining monsters around her.

He makes quick work in slaughtering them all. Once the task is complete he faces her. He expects her to retaliate once more. maybe attempt to hit him again.

His eyes widen in slight surprise when he’s presented with a formal bow. Her head hangs low, and her hands are pressed together as if in prayer.

“Thank you almighty adeptus!” He scoffs at her grateful exclamation. This mortal is quite the handful. He opens his mouth to speak, his face still hidden beneath his mask, when she straightens herself once more and her eyes meet his.

Any response he would’ve had dies in his throat. His mind goes blank as her wide orbs bore into his. How does she even know where his eyes are? Aren’t they hidden behind his mask?

A touch of his fingers against his cheek, not his mask, answers his own question. He must’ve been so consumed with his thoughts that he didn’t notice his mask disappear.

Speaking of said human, she now tentatively takes a step in his direction.

“Stop. Do not come any closer.” His words are harsh and prickly. He crosses his arms across his chest, and he stands firm.

The human takes the hint, but her eyes still stay on his. For some reason this flusters him, and he finally averts his gaze. The human seems to take this as an opportunity to come closer, and a noise of surprise escapes him when a warm pair of arms wrap around him.

Does this mortal have no sense of danger!?

His hands quickly grip your arms to pull you off of him, but he stops himself when he sees your expression.

Your eyelashes house unshed tears and your lips are quivering. He quickly comes to the realization that your tough exterior was just a front. Now, you’re clinging to him as loud sniffles leave you.

He’s as stiff as a board as you cling to him, but he can’t bring himself to pull you off of him. A few moments of awkward silence, save for your sniffles, pass by. Eventually he awkwardly raises his hand to pat your back.

You two stay together in this awkward embrace until you pull away. He wants to scold you and tell you to return to your residence at once, but…

He remains silent.

“Thank you. I did my best to defend myself and remain calm, but I knew there was only so much I could do. I don’t have a vision, so I was feeling pretty desperate haha.” Xiao’s taken aback by your words. How come he didn't notice that before?

He looks over your person. Sure enough, there isn’t a vision in sight. He’s.. a bit impressed by your mental fortitude. You stood your ground and put up a fight despite having no external means of help.

Honestly, he finds that very admirable of you.

“Whatever. Go home. It’s late. There are still monsters around.” The words leave him quickly, and he ushers you away.

You don’t budge despite his pushing, and you turn your head to look at him.

Archons, why do you keep gazing so deeply into his eyes?

He awkwardly coughs as he looks anywhere but in your direction. His hands on your person feel like they’re being lit aflame, so he quickly pulls them away. You turn to face him fully now, only to place a gentle hand on his arm.

He visibly jumps before his hand firmly grips your wrist. “What are you doing?” He grunts. “Can you escort me home? I’m still a bit shaken up...” You murmur the words under breath. You’re so quiet; Xiao wouldn’t have heard you if he weren’t paying such rapt attention to you.

Xiao has no inclination to help you, let alone entertain you any further. He should just disappear from sight like he usually does. You’ll surely be fine. He may have fibbed a bit earlier, there are no more monsters nearby.

His eyes reluctantly meet your orbs once more. Something about the sincerity in your gaze compels him. He finds himself heeding your request despite his better judgment, and soon he falls into stride beside you as he accompanies you home.

“This is foolish.” He mutters under his breath. “It may be to you, but I greatly appreciate your time and generosity.” He didn’t think you heard him, so he’s more than a bit startled by your sincere reply.

He remains silent for the rest of the journey. He doesn’t comment on your close proximity as you walk side by side.

He pays no mind to the occasional brush of your shoulder against his.

He doesn’t notice the way your eyes are curiously drawn to him as you two walk, or the way they rove over his form.

After what feels like a millenia you two arrive at your residence. He should leave now. He’s indulged you more than he needed to. “This is goodby-” You cut him off when you throw your arms around him in a tight, warm hug.

This is the second time you’ve done that tonight.

He hates the way his heart lurches as a result of the unexpected proximity from you.

“Thank you, really. Is there anything I can do to repay you?” Your voice is soft, mesmerizing, and your words are whispered by the shell of his ear and you continue to embrace him.

Honestly he wants you to stop hugging him so his heart can stop pounding in his chest. “You can stop hugging me… and also… stay out of harm's way.” At his request you quickly pry yourself off of him.

He abhors the disappointment he feels now that you aren’t close to him anymore. “I can do that. Thank you…” You trail off, hoping he’ll fill in the blank for you with his name.

This has gone on long enough.

He turns now so his back faces you. He remains silent as he disappears.

You feel a bit disappointed that he didn’t reply, but you’re grateful to him nevertheless.

Little did the both of you know, this encounter was only the beginning of something more.

𓆩♡𓆪

“I thought I told you to stay out of harm's way?” His gruff tone makes you giddy as he holds you in his arms, out of reach from the swarm of monsters.

You truly didn’t expect to see the adeptus that saved you that fateful night ever again, yet here he is.

“I did my best to follow your advice! I just.. Have a bit of a knack for finding myself in crazy situations.” You sound sheepish as you laugh it off, but the yaksha holding you sounds anything but amused.

“You mortals are always such a handful..” He quickly sets you down in a safe area before he gets to work defeating the monsters in front of you.

You cheer him on as if you were his personal cheerleader, and you swear you see the tips of his ears redden.

In no time at all the threat before you vanishes, and the adeptus stands tall in the midst of the aftermath.

Well, as tall as he possibly can. He is quite short after all.

The thought brings a cheeky smile to your lips. The adeptus notices your expression, and a familiar frown presents itself on his pretty features.

“Are you sure you aren’t actively putting yourself in these situations?” He interrogates you. “No! I promise. I really could do without the added stress to my already busy life.” You smile as you make your way over to him.

He doesn’t stop you. He’s clearly contemplating your words.

You don’t blame him. This is your fourth encounter after all. The previous two encounters consisted of him saving you from monsters as well.

Unfortunately he hasn’t walked you home since your last encounter, or told you his name, but you’re determined to learn that information tonight.

“So, mighty adeptus, will you please do me the honor of-” “You can find your own way home. I know you don’t live far from here.” He turns away from you, his telltale sign that he’s about to disappear.

“No, please wait!” You grimace at the desperation in your voice. You notice him flinch slightly at your words.

Surprisingly, he doesn’t leave.

You close the distance between the two of you, and you wrap your arms around him from behind in a hug.

He sighs, a sound you’ve grown quite used to hearing from him. “You are one troublesome human…” He grumbles under his breath. Despite his harsh words he makes no attempt to move away from you. You enjoy this moment as you close your eyes and hold him.

You smile to yourself since he lets you.

“Please escort me home tonight? I’m still figuring out the best way to repay you for saving me so many times; It’s only right that I do something in return.” You fear your words won’t be enough to convince him.

Your fears are promptly quelled. He regretfully moves away from you, but he begins to walk in the direction of your home.

The smile that lights up your face is radiant.

You easily fall into step beside him.

The night air is chilly. You rub your arms with your hands to generate a bit of warmth as you rack your brain for a suitable topic of conversation. From your few encounters with the adeptus you can tell he isn’t the most social individual.

Even so, nothing ventured, nothing gained as they say.

“Is there really no way I can repay you?” You decide to be blunt and cut to the chase. You’re rewarded by a startled snort. The sound is strangely cute coming from him.

Your head whips in his direction, but his face remains stoic as if he made no sound at all. “If I say there is something you can do, will you stop pestering me?” He grumbles. Your eyes shine with delight at the prospect of doing something for the kind individual beside you.

“Yes, please!” You encourage him. He hums in contemplation before he goes silent once more. You pout as the comforting sight of your abode enters your line of vision.

Once you’re standing in front of your door you turn around to wish the adeptus a monsterless rest of his night. Just as your lips part to say your farewells, he speaks. “You can make a dish of almond tofu. Bring it here tomorrow. After that, your debt will have been repaid. Now go to sleep. It’s late.” With those brisk words, he turns and leaves.

He doesn’t completely disappear on you this time, and the delusional part of you believes it’s progress. Unfortunately you still didn’t catch his name, but you’ve made progress in a different sense!

Too bad you don’t have the slightest idea how to make almond tofu…

𓆩♡𓆪

“I’ve been up since early this morning, scouring multiple sources, and said sources have all referred me to you! So please, pleasseee teach me how you make almond tofu!” You’re on your knees in front of the chef of Wangshu Inn, pathetically begging him to teach you his wonderful ways.

Not too far behind you stands Verr Goldet, hunched over and clutching her sides in laughter. The chef takes one look at the sight of you in front of him before a deep, heavy sigh leaves his lips.

“I just can’t catch a break here, huh..?” Those are the only words you hear from him before you're hoisted on your feet and put to work.

Hours full of failed dishes and disgruntled sighs pass by. At one point the chef looked ready to cry, but hey, everything worked out!

Of course by the time you finally manage to make a successful dish of Almond Tofu it’s late into the night. You bestow your thanks upon the chef, but all he does is shake his head as he shoos you away. He may be far off in his assumptions, but he has an idea of who the intended recipient of that dish is.

You carefully wrap the dish in a pretty carry on before you begin to set off in the direction of your home.

Before you’re able to get far a familiar voice stops you. “Wait! Y/n, was it? Head up to the highest floor of the Inn before you go. It’ll save you a lot of time.” Verr’s words confuse you, but you’d be a fool to deny her request. She was the one who told you to seek out the chef after all. So with a firm nod you quickly make your way to the place she insisted you visit before your departure.

Once you get up there, the ephemeral sight of the full moon greets you. The little balcony is empty. It’s quite a beautiful sight, but you’re still a bit lost. Why did the boss want you to come up here?

You turn to leave since you’re eager to get home and present to the adeptus your hard work. You manage to take only a single step before a hand on your arm stops you. “Where do you think you’re going so late into the night?” You shriek and jump a mile into the air.

Wait, that voice. It can’t be…

Yet sure enough when you turn around the adeptus is there, glowering at you. “Did you make the almond tofu?” You want to scold him for his blunt question. Instead you hold your tongue as you shove the food into his hands.

He’s startled as he scrambles to hold the food properly. “You fool! What if I dropped all your hard work onto the floor?” He scowls deeply, but his words make your heart pound. “How do you know that I worked hard to make this?” You breathe.

His cheeks warm considerably; a light pink hue makes itself visible on his cheeks. The moonlight casts an ethereal glow on his person.

“It’s obvious.. with.. how well it’s presented.” His soft words are surprisingly sweet. You find yourself swooning as he unwraps the food you delicately packed for him. He moves closer to the edge of the balcony before he plops himself down with your dish of Almond Tofu.

You slowly make your way over to him before you sit down comfortably beside him.

A stupid smile stretches your cheeks when your knee bumps against his.

You watch attentively as he slowly takes his first bite. He closes his eyes as he savors the taste. He remains eerily still which causes your heart to drop to your stomach. Did you mess up the recipe again? But the chef sampled it and he said it was the best patch of Almond Tofu you’ve managed to make all day! You tried it too, and it tasted pretty good! You hope the adeptus doesn’t take this as an insult.

Wait- were you supposed to properly make an offering of the Almond Tofu to the adeptus, like, in a traditional sense?

Your spiraling, anxious thoughts are stopped in their tracks when he eagerly takes another bite. Two bites turn into three, and soon the plate is wiped clean.

You’re stunned. You watch in awe as he gracefully sets the plate down at his side before turning to you. “It was okay.” You blink. Glance over at the empty plate again. Look at his deadpan expression.

It takes a moment for the giggles to build, but soon you’re full on laughing as you clutch your stomach, similar to Verr Goldet earlier in the day.

The adeptus huffs in faux annoyance as you laugh. Unbeknownst to you, a small smile is on his lips.

“You don’t need to meet me anymore now. Go home earlier, okay?” His words make your laughter come to an abrupt halt. “Huh?” You splutter out in a confused daze. He says nothing as he moves to stand up.

You clutch his arm.

He takes one look at the expression on your face before he sits down. “Please don’t do that. I mean, I understand if you don’t want to see me anymore. I’m sure I’m just another ‘silly mortal’ to you, and I know you have your own burdens and duties to attend to…” His breath hitches at your words. You wish you could delve deeper into that, but unfortunately you don’t know him well enough. Hell, you don’t even know his name.

“I understand, truly.. But..” You turn to face him. Your knee bumps against his once more, but you pay the electrifying tingles no mind as you gently grasp his hands. He sucks in a breath. You expect him to wrench his hands away, but he doesn’t. Whatever the reason is, you won’t waste this chance.

“I want to get to know you better. Maybe it’s simple curiosity.. Maybe it’s something more..” You subtly imply, “But I want to keep seeing you. On your time, of course. Please…” You’d say his name, but you don’t know it.

You squeeze his hands before your eyes seal themselves shut in anticipation of his rejection. He has no reason to accept. You feel like the fool that you surely are, for even suggesting that he’d want to spend more time with- “Xiao. Adeptus Xiao.”

Your eyes shoot open, and your mouth parts in shock. “Stay at the Inn tonight. I’ll speak to Verr Goldet for you. Get some sleep.” His eyes move down to your hands, still gently gripping his, and the faint color on his cheeks deepen its shade.

He averts his eyes, looking down at his shoes before they trail over to the moon, back down to his shoes.

You find his embarrassment to be absolutely adorable.

You thank the archons for their generosity as you finally let go of his hands. You swear you see a smile on his lips before it disappears just as fast as it appeared.

He stands, offering you his hand to take. You gleefully take it and he hoists you up on your feet. “Have a goodnight…” He trails off expectantly.

Huh? Why is he looking at you like that?

“Your name.” He prompts.

Oh.

Wait.

Your cheeks warm to a dangerous degree as your hand flies to your mouth. You’ve wanted to know his name so badly, you focused so much on it. So much so that you forgot you never told him your own name!

“Y/n.” You whisper, your feelings of embarrassment blatant in your voice.

Xiao smirks at your reaction. “I see. Goodnight, Y/n.”

Then he’s gone.

You take a few minutes to cool down and quell your embarrassment before you go down to talk to Verr. Somehow, she has a room available. You gratefully take the room she offers. She tells you it’s on the house, and no matter how much you insist on paying she refuses to take payment.

Aw well, you’ll leave a generous tip in the room before you leave.

A yawn escapes your lips as your eyes fall shut. As you drift off to sleep, images of the short adeptus- Xiao- occupy your every thought.

Meanwhile, in another location, said adeptus continues to whisper your name into the wind.

Y/n.

Y/n…

....

Huh.

He likes the way your name sounds on his tongue.

𓆩♡𓆪

His heart throbs, and his throat feels dry.

His eyes roam over your figure before he quickly turns around, staring off into the distance. Why does he feel so.. Embarrassed? No, that’s not the right word. It’s more like..

You move to stand a bit closer to him, to make space for the person passing the two of you. The hairs on the back of his neck stand on end; he’s acutely aware of your presence.

Ah, self conscious. That’s the word he was looking for.

He can not wrap his head around these newfound feelings he’s having around you. He only told you his name last night, nothing more. Why is he acting like it’s such a big deal to him?

When you move away to create a bit of distance between the two of you he feels oddly disappointed.

Maybe he’s feeling this way because to him, telling you his name and giving you his time is a big deal, whether he’ll admit it to himself or not.

He’s not particularly fond of spending his time with humans. Well, he wouldn’t mind learning more about human culture if it weren’t for his karmic debt.

Speaking of, you seem none the wiser as you two embark on a leisurely stroll. The sun is high in the sky, a stark contrast to the full moon that witnessed the fateful exchange of your names.

Ah, there he goes again.

He scolds himself for thinking of that encounter again. He spent all night thinking of you, enjoying the way your name rolled off his tongue with ease. Even as he fought a few monsters, his thoughts kept drifting to you.

He starts to break out in a cold sweat as he continues to think of you, even as you’re standing right beside him.

Will he be able to perform his duties appropriately? How will he, when’s he’s thinking about you constantly like a lovesick-

Woah.

Where did that word come from? He doesn’t even know you like that.

Xiao’s cheeks redden from his thoughts. He pushes the thought out of his head, refusing to entertain the silly idea any further.

“Thanks for walking me back… even though it’s broad daylight.” You tease. Xiao jerks a bit at your teasing. Why does that lit in your voice sound so alluring to him?

Xiao. Stop.

“It’s nothing. The threat of monsters linger, no matter the hour of the day.” He mentally pats himself on the back for that smooth explanation. He sees the way you nod your head in agreement, but more importantly his eyes zero in on the small upturn of the corner of your lips.

When he catches himself his eyes quickly tear away from you. He awkwardly coughs into his fist before he looks down at the ground.

Is he.. Sick? Why is his heart beating so fast when all he’s doing is walking beside you? Maybe he should ask Zhongli if-

“Earth to Xiao?” You’re in front of him now, your face dangerously close to his as you wave a hand in front of his face.

Oh, Archons.

He abruptly stops walking, and it takes everything in him to avoid leaning further into you.

“Uh, ye- AHEM… yes?” Oh dear. His face burns at the slight crack in his voice. He silently hopes you didn’t catch it.

You most definitely did, but you won’t tell him that.

“Are you alright? It seems like you’ve been zoning out..” Your kind eyes look over him. His palms sweat as he racks his brain for a quick, sensible justification for his wandering thoughts.

“I was.. Just thinking about..” His eyes move every which way as he tries to come up with a new topic of conversation to distract you. He catches sight of a group of fishermen a few feet away, chatting happily amongst themselves as they wait for their lines to lure in their catch.

Ah, perfect.

“What are your hobbies?” You blink owlishly at him before you take a step back.

He releases a breath he didn’t realize he was holding.

“My hobbies? Hm… let’s see..” You resume your position beside Xiao as you begin to delve into your pastimes. You unintentionally talk his ear off, but he’s grateful for it. This way, you forget about his rare moment of absent mindedness and he gets to learn more about you.

He doesn’t delve further into why he wants to learn more about you.

“So there you have it. What about you? I’m sure you’re busy, but I find it hard to believe even the adepti don’t have ways to unwind.” Your question is thought provoking, and honestly a bit insightful.

“This may disappoint you, but not all the adepti have the leisure to indulge in moments of frivolity.” He leaves it at that. In another instance, he may have commended you for your bold question and challenged you to a duel of sorts, but you don’t have a vision and you’re not a renowned traveler.

“Ah, I see. Well then, care to indulge me?” Xiao looks at you with a questioning stare, but you don’t elaborate. At this point in your journey the both of you are close to your abode, as well as Liyue Harbor.

You suddenly grasp his hand as you take off in a jog towards what he assumes is Liyue Harbor. Xiao splutters as he effortlessly keeps pace with you.

“Mortal- I- Y/n- What are you…” The rest of the question leaves his lips in a gasp when you turn to face him, an ethereal smile on your lips.

He’s quiet the rest of the way as he allows you to drag him to Liyue Harbor.

Oh, Zhongli.

This human is nothing but trouble.

𓆩♡𓆪

Xiao finds himself being dragged around Liyue Harbor all day, engaging in various activities with you.

Xiao knows the entirety of Liyue like the back of his hand. He doesn’t need a map; he’ll know any location in Liyue based on a vague description alone.

Yet here you are, bringing him around Liyue Harbor as you force him to encourage him to participate in activities with you and the other citizens of Liyue Harbor.

“Hey, Xiao. Do you like kites?” Your delighted voice drifts through the wind until it reaches his ears. “Hmph. I have no need for such a thing.” Is his stern reply. You seem to anticipate said response since all you do is playfully roll your eyes.

“Mhm. Well lucky for you, I got you one! Ta-da!” You swivel around with a newly purchased kite in hand. Xiao audibly sighs. You wish farewell to the kind old lady selling kites before you two head off once more.

Xiao foresees the way you gleefully fall into step beside him as you walk side by side. Xiao even anticipates the way you subtly sneak the kite into his open hand. What Xiao doesn’t expect is to see Iron Tongue Tian narrating a story to Zhongli.

He freezes.

His feet stop moving forward as he’s rooted to the spot. His thoughts spiral as his mind scrambles for what to do. Should he approach him? It’d be rude not to, but then he’ll know about you. Well, not like it matters. You’re just another human to him and-

“Oh, I love Iron Tongue Tian. He tells the best stories. Come, let’s listen!” Before Xiao’s mind can catch up with his actions, he’s being gently pulled along to sit at the same table as Zhongli.

Oh boy.

Zhongli immediately catches his eye. Xiao almost hates the subtle recognition in his eyes, accompanied by what Xiao discerns to be bewilderment.

He knows Zhongli won’t let him talk his way out of this.

Xiao chooses to sit down between the two of you, as a mediator of sorts. Iron Tongue Tian is currently telling a story, so surely-

“That concludes my story. Fret not, I have come prepared with another story to tell. Please give me a moment of respite as I prepare the scene for my next narration.”

Archons, Why?

Xiao is nonplussed to see the subtle upturn of Zhongli’s lips.

“Ah, Xiao. It’s rare to see you in this setting. Who is this young lady accompanying you? Please, spare no details.” Xiao swears he can feel the lone drop of sweat that travels down his face.

“Mo-.. Zhongli… this is.. Y/n.” Xiao internally berates himself for the breathless way your name leaves his lips. If Zhongli wasn’t curious already, he certainly is now.

“Ah, Y/n is it? A pleasure to make your acquaintance. I go by the name of Zhongli.” Zhongli smiles in your direction as he introduces himself. Xiao turns to gauge your reaction; He doesn’t expect the familiar smile on your lips, or the knowing twinkle in your eye.

Why are you smiling at Zhongli like that?

He feels conflicted.

“I know who you are, Mr. Zhongli. I’ve seen you sitting here, listening to Iron Tongue Tian’s stories many times. It’s nice to meet you.” You reach over, extending your hand for something.

Before Xiao can ask what you need assistance with, Zhongli’s hand grasps yours. You both exchange a gentle shake between the two of you before you retract your hand.

Oh, you were shaking Zhongli’s hand.

He wishes you would shake his, too.

“What a delightful young lady. Tell me, what brings you here? How did you manage to accompany Xiao here, of all individuals?” Xiao hears the underlying tease in Zhongli’s words. He turns his head to face Zhongli once more. A small pout forms on Xiao’s lips, and a small shake of his head signals Xiao’s displeasure of Zhongli’s teasing.

You, none the wiser, happily sit beside Xiao as you hum a tune to yourself. Zhongli leans down to whisper to Xiao, “It’s rare to see you interacting with the citizens of Liyue, yet alone to be accompanied by another party. Especially a human. The last individual I saw you spend your time with was the traveler. What is the occasion for this meeting? Did you orchestrate this? Do you feel comfortable?” Zhongli’s incessant questions only give Xiao a headache.

“I’m fine. There’s no need to concern yourself.” Is his gruff, short answer. Zhongli has become an expert at reading between the lines when it comes to Xiao. Based on Xiao’s body language and tone of voice, Zhongli deduced that nothing of immediate concern was occurring. If anything, Zhongli suspected something else to be at play.

Something he would wholeheartedly support, depending on the type of person he determines you to be.

“So, Y/n. Would you care to tell me more about yourself?” Zhongli elegantly picks up the tea resting on the table in front of him. As he softly blows against the cup, Xiao’s attention is brought back to you.

He watches the way your facial muscles twitch as you open and close your mouth. It’s clear you’re not exactly sure how to respond. Xiao’s patient as he waits for your response, enjoying the telltale sign of nerves you express, as your leg bounces up and down under the table.

“Sure, what would you like to know? My hobbies? My favorite food?” You fill the comfortable silence with a tentative question. “All of that and more, if you will.” Xiao’s a bit taken aback by Zhongli’s forward statement, but you don’t miss a beat. “Okay, sure.”

Many hours pass as you soon fall into easy conversation with Zhongli. Xiao occasionally contributes with your insistence, but overall you and Zhongli engage in pleasant conversation between Iron Tongue Tian’s stories.

Xiao would never admit this, but he’s pleased by this turn of events.

Zhongli is evidently intrigued by you as you two converse, and you’re eager to listen to his wisdom. By the time you two wrap up your long winded conversation, the sun is setting. The sky is a beautiful blend of purples, pinks, and orange hues.

“It seems to have gotten quite late. I’ve immensely enjoyed our conversation Y/n, but I must head off. I hope to see you again soon, friend. Also, it was a pleasure to see you again, Xiao. ” With that Zhongli slowly stands to take his leave.

Wait, friend?

Zhongli referred to you as a friend!

Xiao feels an odd sense of elation. If Zhongli has referred to you in that way, that means Zhongli approves of you as an individual.

Xiao abruptly stands up after Zhongli as he sends a pointed look his way. He hopes Zhongli takes the hint.

“Ah, I see. My apologies Y/n, but I must speak to Xiao privately about a certain matter. Please wait here for his return.” You happily nod as you shoo Xiao off to go talk to Zhongli in private.

Xiao’s cheeks burn for a reason unknown.

He follows Zhongli to a quiet corner. Before Zhongli can speak Xiao’s words burst out of him like a waterfall, unable to be held back. “Zhongli, what do you think of that human? Did they annoy you? Do you approve of them? I recently got to know them after saving them from a group of monsters. Through my many encounters with them, my physical symptoms seem to worsen. My heart pounds, my palms feel sweaty, and I find myself compelled to seek their eyes whenever they speak. Is there something wrong with me Zhongli? Do I need medicine?” Xiao’s words leave him so quickly, so fast, he’s sure Zhongli thinks of him as a nutcase.

Xiao would typically refrain from expressing such concerns to Zhongli. He’d rather shoulder his own burdens and have Zhongli remain none the wiser, but this is something new, Xiao’s never felt these things before. He’s a bit worried, to be quite frank. He knows this isn’t normal since he doesn’t feel this way when he’s around the Traveler or Paimon. Is it something you’re doing? Is-

“Hahah!” Xiao’s thoughts come to an abrupt halt.

Xiao’s eyes widen a fraction as he watches Zhongli’s eyes crinkle with mirth.

It takes a few moments before Zhongli is able to collect himself, but once he does he places a firm, reassuring hand on Xiao’s shoulder.

“Young adeptus, please keep the former word in mind. You are young, and there are many thoughts, experiences, and feelings this world has to offer that you have yet to experience. What you’re feeling right now is normal. It does not matter whether I approve of them or not, as what ultimately concerns me is whether you feel happy around them. If you must know, I find them pleasant to be around, albeit from this brief interaction. None can speak for future events yet to unfold, but I believe you should exercise patience as you navigate this new experience. Don’t fret, my young adeptus. You are doing just fine.”

Xiao releases a deep breath. It feels as if an invisible weight was lifted off his shoulders.

Oh, maybe it was Zhongli’s hand.

Xiao notices Zhongli has retracted his hand, and now he stands before Xiao tall and proud.

“It pleases me to see you engaging with others more. Take care. I shall see you again.” Zhongli’s words feel like a warm hug from a loving, doting parent.

All Xiao can do is watch as Zhongli walks away, looking as refined as he does composed.

Xiao takes this opportunity to close his eyes and center himself. He recalls Zhongli’s words as he takes them to heart.

Xiao takes a deep inhale through his nostrils, and out once more. Zhongli’s right. He’s doing just fine. Despite his better judgment, he’s savored each and every interaction between the two of you. He really should keep his distance, as per his karmic debt, but..

For some reason, the thought of being away from you makes his chest feel tight.

How odd.

Xiao decides you’ve waited long enough. He turns, opening his eyes to return to your side. As he slowly approaches you, waiting patiently at the table, you happen to turn around.

Your eyes lock with his, and a slow smile spreads across your face. Your hand is propped to allow your head to rest upon it, and your eyes twinkle and shine with delight.

His chest feels tight once again, but this time it feels good.

𓆩♡𓆪

Xiao has noticed an obvious change in your behavior; it began after you met Zhongli.

It’s not a bad change per se, but he doesn’t know the meaning behind your actions and sweet words.

It makes him a bit flustered in all honesty.

This scenario is just one of many that he’s had to endure this week alone.

"Stay with me tonight. Please." Goosebumps rise along Xiao’s arm as your whispered words caress the shell of his ear.

“You know I can’t do that.” He retorts. His words are firm and strict, as he moves to put some distance between the two of you.

This is the first time he’s been in your abode, the one he often accompanies you to, and now you want him to stay. He stifles a groan when your arm wraps around his, effectively keeping him where you want him.

He made the mistake of accepting your offer to come inside. He’s not someone who typically indulges such requests from others, but with you, he’s found himself doing things he would never do for another.

You successfully lured him to your room, claiming you need his help with something that only he could assist you with, and now you’re trying to fall asleep with him by your side.

Xiao swears it’s not happening.

"I'll keep you warm."

…

Okay, maybe a few minutes wouldn’t hurt.

“Fine, but I’ll only stay until you fall asleep.” Your eyes widen in shock at his acceptance of your proposal. Your soft lips part as your hands squeeze his arm-

Get a hold of yourself.

Xiao scolds himself at his inappropriate, wandering thoughts. Why is he focusing on how soft your lips are? Or the way they curl up into a cheeky grin as you pull him down beside you? Or-

He awkwardly coughs into his fist as he averts his gaze.

You act all too familiar with him as you snuggle up beside him, resting your head on his shoulder.

Archons, his heart is pounding.

“Did I say you could do that?” He grumbles. You only giggle in reply, pressing yourself further into him.

His Adam's apple bops as he swallows any further complaints.

Xiao peers intently at your face, and he notices the faint bags under your eyes.

Ah, no wonder you’re acting so familiar with him.

Xiao picked up on a cute habit of yours, whenever you’re sleepy you act more familiar with him. You also tend to voice things he believes you hold back in fear of making him uncomfortable.

"You feel like home."

Ah, except he secretly wishes you’d say things like this to him all the time,

His cheeks warm at your whispered confession. “D-Don’t be ridiculous…” He spits the words out, false contempt within them, but you only release a blissful sigh as you relax against him.

He finds himself at a loss for words as you slowly drift off to sleep.

He hesitantly raises his hand to place it upon your head, fingers mere centimeters from your hair, before he stops himself.

Honestly, what is he doing?

As an adeptus, he shouldn’t indulge in these things. He has a duty to carry out, and his karmic debt could cause you harm at a moment’s notice.

With such sobering thoughts in mind, he quickly retracts his hand.

He sighs, slowly removing yourself from his person. For some reason the thought of leaving you causes his chest to constrict. He clutches his chest where his heart lay beneath.

Why does he feel this way?

With a huff he turns to leave, before he spots sheets of paper on a desk in your room.

Curiosity piqued his interest, but he refuses to invade your privacy. A blank sheet of paper catches his attention, so he makes his way over.

Deftly, he grabs a writing utensil before scribbling a message to you in neat script.

He leaves the note on your pillow where his head previously lay, before he vanishes in thin air.

His thoughts wander back to your sleeping figure for the rest of the night, and an unfamiliar warmth blossoms in his chest.

𓆩♡𓆪

You awake the next morning, content after finally getting a good night’s rest. You stretch, and something crinkles by your ear.

You look for the source, and a small piece of paper catches your eye.

When you gently lift the paper to read it’s contents, the words bring back a rush of memories from the night before.

When you were being overly clingy with Xiao.

Your entire body burns as you force yourself to read his note. You hope he doesn’t hate you! Gosh, you hope you didn’t make him uncomfortable…

Your worries are quelled when you read his words.

When you are in mortal danger, call out my name. Adeptus Xiao. I will always be here when you call.

Your lips form a goofy smile as you re-read his words over and over again. “Adeptus Xiao…” You murmur his name under your breath, only to cry with a shout when he suddenly appears before you.

“You called?”

“Uhhh..” Your cheeky smile is enough to clue Xiao in; you had accidentally called his name.

He expresses his annoyance with a cross of his arms and a twitch of his eyebrow, yet the corner of his lips twitch upwards as well. You don’t focus on the implications of that since he’s already scolding you, “I’m certain that I wrote, ‘When you are in mortal danger,’ did I not?” A nervous giggle escapes your lips, and once again the corner of his mouth twitches.

“I.. I’m sorry Xiao. Your name just kinda slipped out when I was thinking about you…” Your face flushes with warmth as you glance every which way to avoid looking at his face.

You hear footsteps approach you, and it only heightens your nerves. “Relax. I’m not upset.” His fingers gently lift your chin, forcing you to look at him. His bright amber eyes peer deeply into your orbs.

It takes every ounce of strength in you not to lean into his touch.

“Y/n…” Your eyes flutter close when your whispered name escapes his lips, flowing into your ears like a whispered confession of love.

“Xiao…” Your eyes open once more when his fingers are suddenly gone.

He’s standing on the opposite end of the room, looking a bit uncomfortable now. You’re a bit confused, but you figure it’s nothing personal.

“Xiao, can you meet me at Wangshu Inn tonight? The same place we met when you tried the Almond Tofu I made you?” Your abrupt suggestion catches Xiao off guard. You’re surprised by your own outburst, quite frankly.

You just want to see him again.

“I.. okay. Same time. Don’t be late.” He forces the words out before he vanishes before your eyes.

Yet a smile remains on your lips as you stare at the space he once occupied.

𓆩♡𓆪

You’ve spent a lot of time thinking before you left for Wangshu Inn. Why did you ask to meet up with him today? Why have you gone out of your way to be close to him?

Well, it didn’t take an Archon to figure out the reason behind your actions.

So, with a firm resolve, you’ve decided you won’t tell Xiao how you feel. You highly doubt an adeptus has time for a relationship, yet alone can harbor romantic feelings for a mere mortal like yourself. You think you’re a pretty cool person, but you also don’t want to be a burden to him.

The last thing you’d want to do is make Xiao uncomfortable and destroy this wonderful relationship you’ve developed with him. You’re wise enough to know Xiao doesn’t form friendships easily, let alone dedicating time to people like has with you.

So, with your renowned resolve you make your way to Wangshu Inn, intending to spend quality time with Xiao.

As you make your way up the steps, your eyes light up when you see Xiao already waiting for you. He’s standing with his back to you, his face tilted towards the sky. Your heart squeezes in your chest, you want nothing more than to tell him how you really feel, but you’d hate it if it ruined everything…

Almost as if Xiao can hear your racing thoughts, he turns around. “Why are you just standing there?” You jump slightly, quickly making your way over to stand beside him. “Sorry…” You murmur.

Xiao says nothing, turning back to look up at the sky. “Y/n… this isn’t easy for me to do but… I need to be honest with you.” Your heart races when his words reach your ears. You turn, staring intently at his face. He doesn’t turn to look at you, opting to continue staring at the night sky littered with stars.

Said stars twinkle in anticipation as your conversation unfolds.

“I think it’d be best if I… wasn’t around you so often. My karmic debt isn’t something to be taken lightly, and…” The rest of his words are muffled as your face flushes with intense heat; your ears ring and your world temporarily spins on it’s axis.

You don’t even notice when Xiao gently shakes your shoulders, before he’s shouting your name in panic.

“Y/n!” His voice snaps you out of whatever daze you were in. Your vision clears and suddenly his amber eyes are oh so close to your face.

Your breath hitches.

Is he trying to leave you? …

Honestly, you wanted to keep your feelings buried deep inside, but you won’t let him leave you behind without a fight. With no hesitation you firmly place both of your hands on his cheeks, holding his face in place.

A radiant blush presents itself on his face, but you refuse to acknowledge it if only to tell him the words you desperately need him to hear.

“Xiao, I didn’t plan on telling you this because I’d hate to be a burden to you. You’re an adeptus and I’m a human. You have a longer lifespan than I do, and I honestly would hate to drag you down or give you more problems than you already have, but…” You take a deep breath to slow the rapid beat of your heart.

Emotion swirls in Xiao’s eyes, but you refuse to let go of him as you continue on.

“Even so, I don’t want you to distance yourself from me! These past few weeks have been so much fun, and I’ve been so happy. You know why? Because you were there with me, Xiao.” You hear his sharp intake of breath at your words, but he looks down at your shoes.

His hands place themselves over yours, trying to remove your hands from his face. “I’ve heard enough Y/n, you don’t understand-” “No, you don’t understand!” Your loud exclamation startles the both of you.

Xiao freezes, but he stops trying to pry your hands away from his face. Instead, he closes his eyes, nodding his head to prompt you to continue.

You cough awkwardly, a habit you seemed to pick up from Xiao.

“S-Sorry..” The words quietly leave your lips, but Xiao’s quick to dispel your worries. “Nonsense. Continue speaking.” So, you do.

“I know you’re worried about your.. Karmic debt will result in me being hurt, but.. Honestly Xiao, you may not see it yourself but you have such a kind soul. You continue to fight monsters, watching over Liyue no matter how hard you have to push yourself. I remember the other night, when it seemed the wave of monsters were endless, you still kept fighting not only to protect me, but to protect everyone in Liyue. If by chance something does occur, I promise you we can figure it out when that happens. Xiao, you deserve happiness too. I don’t want to assume being with me makes you happy, but if those little twitches your mouth did earlier are any indication, then you shouldn’t distance yourself from me and cut off our connection before any relationship can even begin.” At your words, his eyebrows furrow and he visibly starts breathing faster.

His eyes slowly pry themselves open, and the pain you see swirling in the depths of his irises makes your heart lurch in empathy.

His lip trembles, and with a steady hand your thumb slowly swipes across his lower lip.

He exhales at your touch, visibly shivering. He’s silent, his brain clearly trying to think of something to say.

You patiently wait for him to collect his thoughts. In the meantime, you admire the teal undertones of his dark hair, tugging lightly on his hair.

You hesitate to do more, but he seems to appreciate your gentle touch. His eyes close once more, so you lean in, pressing soft kisses along his jaw.

He trembles, eyes snapping open, and he moves back to remove himself from your touch.

“These hands have slayed many, you’d be wise to stay away.” The words almost sound foreign coming out of his mouth, and he appears unsure of himself. You get the feeling he’s giving you every opportunity to back out, if only for your protection.

You huff, a soft laugh leaving your lips; it appears the both of you were suppressing your own feelings in hopes of preserving the others’.

“Hm? These hands?” You allow him to remove his face from your touch, but you slowly reach down to grasp his hands.

Some irresponsible, foolhardy part of himself allows you to.

You unhurriedly lift his hands to your lips. Said lips brush along his knuckles, placing well meaning kisses against each one.

He remains silent, but makes no move to pull away.

You smile to yourself, moving to stand closer to him.

He stands in front of you, stiff as a board.

“Do you mind if I touch you, Xiao?” His eyes are teeming with emotion. He gazes deeply into your own, before he slowly nods his consent. “I need to hear you say it, sweetheart.”

That gets a reaction out of him.

Dark cheeks accompany his hurried, “Go ahead.” You press your body to his, placing a tender kiss to the place between his neck and shoulder.

You continue to press kisses along his body in hopes that your actions get your feelings across to him.

Your eyes trail along his body, fingers applying slight pressure below his stomach as they outline his waist. He swallows thickly, mentally telling himself to remove himself from your addicting touch.

Despite his intentions to move away, he’s enraptured; rooted to the spot as your loving touches bring life to his dormant heart.

You suddenly lower yourself, and Xiao swears his heart jumps in his throat when you press a kiss to his hip bone, over the fabric of his clothes. “That’s enough!” His words are harsh, and he roughly lifts you up by your arm, only to pull you in by the waist.

Now your body is pressed firmly against his.

You can feel just how fast his heart is beating, and you’re sure he can feel your speedy heart pace too.

No words are exchanged as you raptly stare into each other’s eyes. Neither of you comment on the lack of distance between the two of you, and you surely don’t object when your lips are soon mere millimeters apart.

Soon, they aren’t apart any more.

The two of you simultaneously groan when your lips press against each other. It’s an innocent kiss, full of emotion. Your arms wrap around his neck as his hands on your waist pull you impossibly closer to him.

It feels like an eternity passes before you pull apart.

As you stare at each other in silence once more, you feel a lopsided smile on your face. Xiao’s cheeks are painted a beautiful shade of pink as his amber eyes zero in on your lips.

Surprisingly, Xiao is the first to break the silence.

"Sorry, that was my first kiss."

You giggle.

"I could tell."

"...."

"I'm kidding!"

He rolls his eyes as you burst into a fit of giggles. He figures the only way to shut you up is to kiss you again.

…

So he does; eagerly.

𓆩♡𓆪

“Zhongli, do you remember Y/n?” Xiao now sits across from Zhongli, as Iron Tongue Tian prepares to share a scene from his new narration.

“Of course I do. It’d be hard to forget a human who has formed such a strong connection with you, Xiao.” Zhongli’s words hint at an underlying meaning, and it makes Xiao bristle.

Zhongli only laughs; he’s fond of teasing Xiao.

“What about them, Xiao? Have you found answers to your previous questions?” Zhongli leans forward, giving Xiao all of his attention as he patiently waits for his response.

Xiao hesitates before giving a slow, deliberate nod of his head. Zhongli’s eyes crease with glee as Xiao’s mouth forms a sweet smile.

“Yes. I have.” Xiao’s simple response earns a hum from Zhongli. “And what is your final answer?” Zhongli leans back as he studies Xiao.

He notices the way Xiao shifts his weight in his seat, and how he fails to hide his shaky hands underneath the table. “My final answer is that I..” Xiao glances up at Zhongli, but all he finds is patience within those amber eyes.

Xiao takes a deep breath before he willingly admits, “I have grown quite fond of this human, and it appears they share similar feelings for me.” Xiao waits with bated breath for Zhongli’s response.

Zhongli closes his eyes as he digests Xiao’s words, yet he can’t contain his smile.

“I see. Do you feel happy when you’re with them?” Zhongli’s question confuses Xiao, and a tilt of his head displays that. “Of course I do. Otherwise, I wouldn’t spend so much time with them.” It appears Xiao doesn’t recall Zhongli’s previous words from their earlier conversation, but that is quite alright with him.

“Then that is all that matters. I am happy for you, Xiao.” Zhongli opens his eyes, leaning across the table to gently grasp Xiao’s hands in his. He gives it a squeeze, before he pulls away. The action visibly flusters Xiao, clearly embarrassed.

“Zhongli…” Xiao groans. Zhongli beams, blithely expressing his delight as he laughs without constraint.

“Ah, there you are.” Xiao immediately turns around at the sound of your voice, and a twinkle Zhongli has never seen before presents itself within his eyes.

That’s all the confirmation he needed.

With a small smile, Zhongli stands. He shares a brief greeting with you before he looks at Xiao once more. Xiao stares at him with a neutral expression, before it slowly morphs into a shy grin.

Zhongli turns to leave without another word, whistling a tune under his breath.

Ah.

He almost forgot how beautiful love can be.

…

Xiao watches Zhongli leave before he turns to you, gently taking your hand in his. You lean your head on his shoulder as you close your eyes, listening to Iron Tongue Tian’s story.

Xiao’s hand squeezes yours as he plays with your fingers.

He fails to suppress his smile when you squeeze back.

#xiao x female reader #xiao x fem reader #Xiao x reader #Xiao x female reader #Xiao x fem reader #Xiao x reader genshin impact #Xiao x you #xiao x y/n #genshin x you #genshin x reader #reader insert #genshin x female reader #genshin x fem reader #genshin reader insert #xiao x you #xiao x reader

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maplebean2003 · 4 months ago

Text

Master millers daughter headcanon

Now imagine the anxiety he had probably when his wife was giving birth

Him pacing silently irritable waiting but cause he's anxious only to immediately be brought to mush the moment he saw his new family

Being terrified he'd be a bad luck charm or fuck this up somehow

Now imagine him hearing her first word be maxi buns and him laughing with his wife immediately picking their daughter up in his arms and cooing at her

Protective dad whenever someone gets too close

Him making baby formula while holding her and also on the phone

Him gently feeling her face to make it out since he can't see and just chuckling when he realizes she has his own eye shape or something cute idk

Him putting his glasses on her and snickering at how badass she looks

Him cursing only to immediately panic for her not to repeat it

her playing with her dad's long hair tugging on it even which hurts

Her puking on him the first time and him being sooo grossed out 'this is why I hate kids' he'd think only to see her face and immediately retract his thoughts with 'except her...she's the only acception.'

Him struggling so hard to properly get a diaper on her so his wife has to show miller how to fuckin do it and then he becomes an expert

Miller vanishing one day knowing he'd wind up dead at some point so to protect them he vanishes letting them think he was a deadbeat but nah he just couldn't handle the thought of his daughter or divorced ex wife finding him dead

Hence why no one knew for three days or showed up

Him actually having a tear slip down his cheeks as he dies knowing he never will get to see his daughter grow up

But smiling in relief that he got at least one good thing out of his lives entirety for once

Her

Her finding old photos one day of her dad looking like a stud in the 70's and realizing she has his exact old watch on her wrist having never realized it was his and just kinda grabbed it cause it looked neat

Or her having very similar glasses or hair aw

seeing big boss in the photo and raising an eyebrow when she turns it over only to see hearts skribbled on it finding out her dad would've been okay with her being LGBTQ+ as well

Chuckling lightly in amusement 'what a loser' she'd think not aware of how much he actually loved her

Wedding pictures dusty and not looked at for years

He'd look so happy and dorky in those pictures with his ex wife for once looking hopeful and even dapper even with his silly mullet

When his ex would tell him the news about her being pregnant miller would be flabbergasted and choke on the curry he was eating almost dying then and there in shock

He would panic thinking he would never make a good father but yet he'd make himself become one while he was alive

He'd shake and tremble when he'd feel the first kick in his wife's stomach and tear up emotionally but when asked if he was he'd lie and say no he wasn't

But a small smile always gave it away, he'd scold liquid and solid for cursing around his kid she's too little

Holding her he'd be shocked how fragile a child really was and he'd remember his own mother wondering if this is how she felt as well before she died

He wished she were still there to be a grandmother of this cool kid but he felt content believing that she was watching above

Just like he would for his own child once he'd be killed

Happiness For just a few brief months

It was the best few months of his life probably

He'd forever be glad he got to meet his daughter even if she wouldn't remember him and how he'd protect her with his life

So bittersweet

Sorry,I'm at work and just like

Realllllly love the dynamic and my mind is brainstorming so hard rn ;∆; I'm now sad

Had he gotten to live he would've been the dad that lets his daughter play makeup on him or like tea party time

Or maybe she'd prefer more war themed toys much to millers dismay and he'd scoff but have fun in the imaginary field more then the real field because at least when he Lost the imaginary field she'd jump on him and squeal and laugh triumphantly because she'd won the play time and he'd pretend to fall over Everytime surrendering

The only time he'd ever surrender would be to her and only her :'))

Now imagine them fighting each other for realow

planning to give his glasses to her when she's older to keep but never being able to because liquid wanted that inheritance first (aka millers death in a nutshell lmfao)

That's all MGS1 is is liquid being overly jealous that his siblings were liked better then him

The theme now in my head is bigger than the whole sky from Taylor Swift but it's Kaz to her :'))) FUCKING OW OW OW OW OW

#mgs #mgsau #mgsheadcannon #headcanon #master miller #mgs kaz #kazuhira miller #kaz miller #kazuhira mgs #kaz #Catherine miller #metal gear solid headcannon #metal gear solid au #metal gear solid 1 #metalgearsolid #metal gear #metal gear solid #angst #Spotify

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rottenpumpkin13 · 1 year ago

Note

zack’s chaotic mukbang frightens yet intrigues me

SOLDIER Vlogging Shenanigans pt. 38

[The video starts and there's a nose pressed right up to the lens. It sniffs, and then an "oh crap, I'm too close" is heard before the nose backs away]

[Zack appears fully now. He's grinning and waving at the camera. Behind him are Sephiroth, Angeal and Genesis all sitting on the floor in front of a coffee table. Genesis is on his phone, Angeal is organizing the various takeout containers, and Sephiroth is eying the food]

"What's up vlog? Today we're doing things a bit differently! We're doing a .....Drumroll please!"

[The three behind him start rythmically banging their fists on the coffee table. Genesis is still on his phone]

"We're doing a Mick-Bing!" Zack announces, bouncing on his feet.

"MUKBANG!" Genesis echoes from behind him.

"Mukbang!" Zack corrects himself, still grinning. "As you can see behind me, we've ordered from that place in downtown sector three that's famous for their tongue-transplant-wings and—"

[Sephiroth raises his hand in the background. Zack stops talking and turns around]

"Yes, Seph?"

"Why are they called tongue-transplant-wings?"

[Before Zack can answer, Genesis shoves his phone in Sephiroth's face with a smack]

"Because those who eat them suffer tongue injuries! Look at this article. One gentleman needed a tongue transplant! Hence the name!"

[Zack backs up from the camera and sits down at the coffee table]

"It's not that serious." He waves one hand dismissively while opening a takeout box with the other. "We're SOLDIER, right? Our pain tolerance is, like, crazy high! We'll be fine."

[Sephiroth is still reading the article on Genesis's phone, his eyebrows raising further up with every word he reads]

"Zack has a point," Angeal says with a shrug, then immediately grimaces as if the words taste bitter on his lips. "Even if the wings are lethal to unenhanced humans, we'll still handle it no problem."

"Alright!" Genesis shrugs, annoyed. "So what this means is that even if my tongue melts, I won't feel it! Yup! That's comforting!"

[Sephiroth looks up from the phone as Angeal and Zack start laughing]

"Don't be such a baby, Gen!" Zack mocks him. "What? Are you scared of a little bit of hot sauce?"

"Are you scared you're going to get your fingers dirty?" Angeal chimes in with a smug look.

[Genesis looks into the camera furiously. Smoke is practically billowing from his nostrils as his face reddens. Sephiroth watches as Genesis tears open his box of wings]

"You know what? Let's just get this over with. Then, when we're all bonding in the Infirmary, I'll have the pleasure of saying I told you so!"

[Sephiroth stares at the glistening, red chicken wings inside his own box. He looks apprehensive]

"If you still have a tongue with which to speak, that is," he says.

[Genesis's eyes widen comically, making Angeal double over laughing. As Zack tries to catch his breath, he grabs a wing from his own box, prompting the others to do the same]

"Alright!" Zack clears his throat. "On the count of three, ready? One, two, three, eat!"

[All four of them take a bite out of their food. The camera then films Zack spitting his piece back out]

"THIS IS WHAT MURDER TASTES LIKE," he yells, fanning his mouth, "IT'S LIKE A CHAINSAW IN THE FORM OF A CHICKEN WING!"

[Angeal is sweating profusely. He's hysterical, reaching for the glass of water in front of him]

"HOW THE HELL IS THIS LEGAL?" He screams before splashing the water on his face.

"I TOLD YOU SO!" Genesis screeches back. His face is the same color as his coat. He's inhaling his third glass of milk. "I TOLD—"

[Genesis starts retching]

[The last thing the camera films is Genesis running to the bathroom to throw up, Angeal diving across the table to get to Sephiroth's glass of milk, and Zack screaming "MY TONGUE IS MELTING!"]

[The next video starts with Sephiroth. He's walking around Angeal's apartment, holding a chicken wing with one hand and filming himself with the other]

"I don't know what all the fuss is about." He continues to chew. "The chicken wings are quite nice. Wouldn't you say so, Genesis?"

[He pans the camera around. Genesis is on the floor with his head completely submerged in a bucket of milk. Genesis lifts his head briefly. He's drenched in the drink]

"Fuck you," he says simply.

[Genesis dunks his head back in the bucket of milk]

[Sephiroth laughs, then ends the video]

#ffvii #ff7 #genesis rhapsodos #final fantasy 7 #sephiroth #angeal hewley #ffvii crisis core #ff7r #zack fair #final fantasy #ff #final fantasy vii #ff7cc #final fantasy vii crisis core #soldier vlog

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thatonegenshinsimp · 2 years ago

Note

Hello :D may I request a quiet or slightly shy reader teaching Childe how to use his bow? Childe has never seen them use a bow either so he gets surprised when they help him a lot. ùwú

Of course, anon. This was so fun to write tbh. It’s kinda short but anyways, enjoy!

Masterlist

"You're holding it too far to the left, you're going to shoot it left if you keep holding your bow like that."

Those were the first words you said to him on the day of your date with him, which was supposed to be in Liyue Harbor. He had made a last minute change of plans, and invited you to take a walk with him through the mountains instead.

"What do you mean? This is always how I've shot a bow." he chided. "Yes, hence why your bow skills are still lacking." you said. Ajax looked over at you and sighed, watching as you fidgeted with the smooth river stone on your necklace. it was a nervous habit of yours that he'd picked up on over his years of dating you. It wasn't that you were nervous about talking to him, far from it, in fact. You were nervous about his skills failing him and costing him his life on the battlefield. Just thinking about him not coming back to you one day scared you. "Alright, show me how you shoot then, since you’re the expert and all." he sarcastically remarked. Although you'd never shown him, your skills with a bow were exemplary. You were considered to be one of the best sharp shooters in Liyue. You grabbed the bow and aimed carefully, closing your non-dominant eye and thinking for all of two seconds as your body practically melted into the bow. It seemed to become a part of you as you nocked an arrow and shot it, sending it flying through the air before it hit the dead center of the target. You turned to look back at your boyfriend, who stared at you slack jawed. Ajax walked over to you and wrapped you up in his arms, tangling his fingers in your hair as he pulled you close and slammed his lips against yours. “If I’d known you were struggling to use a bow, I would have helped teach you, Ajax.” You mumbled, putting your hands on his shoulders as you looked to the side. “Why didn’t you tell me you knew how to properly shoot a bow like that?” He asked, pulling away slightly. “I don’t really know. Do you want me to teach you?” You asked, looking up at him. “Yes, I’m struggling with using a bow if I’m being honest.” He admitted, scratching the back of his head. “Alright then, I’ll show you how I do it first.” You said, picking up another arrow from the quiver at your feet. You demonstrated the steps you went through before setting the bow back down and standing up.

"Now then, your turn. Pick up the bow." you commanded, silently watching as he did as you told him. "Relax your shoulders. your rigid posture is what's causing you to aim to the left." you advised. Childe slowly relaxed his shoulders and held the bow more naturally. "Now then, keep a firm grip on the bow handle. you don't want the arrow to miss because of a bad grip, do you?" you asked, listening to him as he chuckled softly. "Point taken, now what?" he asked, watching as you smiled softly. "Nock an arrow, you goof. What else are you going to shoot?" you joked, laughing softly. Ajax looked at you and laughed with you, grabbing an arrow and getting back into the position he was in before. "Do I look good?" he asked, smirking back at you. You huffed softly, shaking your head. "Shut up and aim." you retorted, watching as he did so. Childe looked at the target and closed his non-dominant eye, aiming and shooting the arrow. He hit barely into the second ring of the target, but he cheered when he saw that he actually hit it. "I did it. I finally did it!" he cheered, looking over at you. "That deserves a kiss, don't you think?" he teased, causing you to look to the side as your face went slightly red. You almost timidly leaned forward and pressed your lips against his, before pulling away and taking your bow back. As you did so, he gently grabbed your wrist and turned you to face him. “How did I get so lucky to have you?” He thought out loud, wrapping his arms around your torso. “I- um- mph!” He didn’t wait for you to answer before kissing you again, falling back onto the soft grass below as he held you close to him. “Ajax, are you ok?” You asked, eyes wide with worry. He nodded, a bright smile on his freckled face. You would have scolded him if it weren’t for the look he gave you. His blue eyes seemed to swallow you whole as he gazed at you with so much love. “I love you.” He whispered, his voice heavy with emotion. You smiled softly before pressing your lips against his yet again. “I love you too, Ajax.” You replied, your hands reaching up to hold his face. The two of you stayed like that for a while, silently holding onto each other and talking the day away together.

#genshin impact #genshin impact x reader #genshin #childe #childe x reader #childe genshin impact

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ghostieevie · 2 years ago

Text

Gain Courage

Link was gone, and Ravio couldn’t handle it.

Link came back, left again, and Ravio knew too late that he loved him.

Legend came back, and Ravio was gone. Legend couldn’t handle it.

Now Ravio has to fight in a war that’s not his own. Aiding a different Link through his adventures and fighting his own demons as well.

He has to gain courage. After all, he won’t survive as the coward he is. That isn’t an option, because he has to get back to his Link.

Or: Ravio gets pulled into Hyrule Warriors. He kicks ass, takes names and simps for his Mr. Hero.

Don’t expect a schedule lol

It had been thirteen months, two weeks, six days and ten hours since Link fell through a portal that appeared from under him, and closed before Ravio could even blink.

It had been ten months, three days, seven hours and six minutes since Link came back as Legend three months after Ravio saw him disappear.

It had been one week after that, that Link was torn from him again.

It had been nine months, one week, four days and nine hours since Ravio had gotten the first of many letters which prompted a constant back and forth of writing.

It had been then, as he clutched the precious letters to his chest that Ravio realized that he was hopelessly, undoubtedly and stupidly in love with Link. Head over heels? No no no more like tumbling down several hills and mountains before impaling his heart with a stick.

And it had been exactly one minute, that as Ravio was placing some of his most important items into his bag, that he himself was falling into a dark swirling purple abyss, positively reeking of dark magic.

And as he closed his eyes, he hopes he would end up with Link on the other side. But fate was always one to play tricks.

❦

Ravio hummed a cheery tune as he walked up the leaf covered pathway to Link’s house. He had just returned from the market because they ran out of ingredients durning breakfast. Ravio glanced up at the mid-day sun. Okay, so maybe lunch. He shook his head as he opened the door. Grinning he cupped a hand to his mouth.

“Oh honey!~ I’m home!~” He made sure to drag the ‘o’s out in a typical annoying fashion. Link groaned (good naturedly to the few who knew him) ahead of him, lounging at the table.

“Not married, fuck you. And even if we were, you would the house wife. You stole my line.” Ravio scoffed as he lifted up his hood. He cocked his hip and placed a hand on it in sass and faux confidence.

“Oh? Is that because you never do any housework, go to the market or cook?” Ravio pointed a finger at him. “Well then of course I’m the stay at home partner!” Ravio held back a smile under a playful scowl as Link began to hold in a laugh.

“Oh ho ho? Now your laughing at me? That’s it! We’re getting divorced and I’m taking…” Ravio trailed, looking around the room. He quickly grabbed a small plush rabbit.

“Mr.Hero jr. with me!” And with that it seemed that the man burst out laughing. Ravio began to laugh himself at the inane joke. Internally however his heart melted and he wanted to paint the scene in front of him, he hadn’t had a clue why.

The light from the window seemed perfect, hitting the hero from the side in all the right places. Link himself was still sitting in the rosewood chair, slightly curled in himself with one arm across his stomach and the other held up so his hand could futilely hide his laughter.

Ravio stood mesmerized by the light playing with the pink strands in front of Link’s face he could never manage to stay dyed, from his pink bunny adventures that Ravio would tease him of, hence the soft baby pink rabbit in his hands. He wanted to stop time, for just this moment.

Ravio shook himself out of his thoughts, bringing himself back to the moment as Link stopped laughing. (He couldn’t help but miss the sound) The merchant bent down and began to pick up the cloth bags he used for shopping, that he set down sometime durning the conversation, only to look up as gloved hands picked up half of the bags in one swoop.

“Well I wouldn’t much of a husband if I didn’t help out, no?” Link grabbed a few more and headed into the kitchen, Ravio following suit.

❦

“…nd then he told me that the bread was blessed! If that wasn’t just plain ridiculous, then further proof was that I didn’t sense jack crap from it! Honestly just tell me your up charging bread.” Ravio finished his rant as he bit down angrily on a bite of beef stroganoff… and promptly melted into the bite of his favorite food. (Unbeknownst to him, Link found him quite endearing, perhaps even cute… and mentally slapped himself.)

“I would have figured people would have tried to stop scamming you by now. After all, you are the biggest scam of them all.” Ravio gasped at his words, trying to act offended. Pfft, he knew that he was a scammer. How would he make a living otherwise? Honest profit? Perish the thought.

“I’ll have you know I am but a fair merchant, I’ll even let you take something for free!” He trilled, pointing his fork dramatically to punctuate his statement. Ravio was already planning on giving Link something free for his quest he would be going on after lunch.

“Yeah right.” Link flicked his nose, causing Ravio to drop his fork and hold it with his hands. He pouted at Link as he was getting up.

“Well then, I’ll just have to show you! Come on Mr.Hero!” Ravio went up to the bedroom with Link behind him. Ravio slid out two small boxes from under the bed. (“How?? How did I not notice that under my bed-“) He nervously chewed on his tongue as he rose to his feet.

“Kay! So this won’t look like much but this will offer you some basic protection from the elements.” Ravio began to ramble as he sat on the bed and gestured for Link to do the same. “Mostly everything, so long as you don’t jump into lava or get frozen in a block of ice for more than twenty four hours.” He lightly glared at Link at the last part. He put his hands up in mock surrender.

“Okay, that wasn’t my fault and it was only half an hour!” Link attempted to defend himself as he took a seat next to him. Honestly, Ravio was worried sick when he came back with blue lips and fingers!

“Yeah, well it happened so this should make sure you don’t die via ice block.” Ravio stuck his tongue out. Link huffed and rolled his eyes before Ravio handed him one of the boxes, the darker one of the two. He held his breath baitedly as the box was examined closely, before it was opened. Inside lay an intricately carved wooden ring. The dark cherry wood was carved to give the illusion that two wooden pieces were intertwined, like a braid but with only two pieces and not three. And most notably, the purple gem that lay in the middle.

Ravio squirmed as the silence dragged on, and began his horrid stuttering. “The taa- Ahem the taaffeite- gah! The taaffeite is said to bring good luck and fortune. I carved this ring myself y’kno- ack!” His sentence was cut short by the hero tackling him into a tight hug. He didn’t know what to do, if he was honest. The last time he was hugged… oh goddess when was the last time? Wait hold on… Link of all people was hugging him. The least tactile person in Hyrule.

“Thanks, Rav. This is- you MADE this for me?…” He nodded before Link backed away. Ravio could actually burst in excitement. He lit up as he remembered one last thing up his sleeve.

“Not only that buuut-“ Ravio opened the other box which held a similar design but with a bright pink thulite gem in place of the taaffetite. He put it on. “I have one to match! Put yours on and I’ll show you why!” Link took a second to look at Ravio’s own ring, probably realizing the matching colors to eachother. It wasn’t what Ravio had intended but it worked out alright. The other eventually slid on his own ring.

Ravio grinned as he pushed a bit of magic through the ring, and watched Links face as his own ring responded with a light glow, and what should be a slight tugging sensation.

“This is so that I can at least know your alive and well. Just push a small- ish amount of magic through, and it reacts.” Ravio explained. Link nodded, and he could feel a small yank, enough to pull his hand forward. The ring glowed bright. Ravio giggled, and waved Link off.

“It shouldn’t take much or any magic. That being said, if you’re completely drained you can also tap it on something containing similar magic to yours. It won’t feel the same, more impersonal than with your own but it should do.” Ravio watched Link concentrate once more, and this time as the ring reacted, it was subtle just like how he himself had done it.

Ravio cheered, he did it! Link rolled his eyes and playfully pushed his shoulder. “Shouldn’t I be the one celebrating? Why are you more excited than me about me being able to control my magic flow?” Link teased. And to anyone else it was in a harsh tone, but not to him. To Ravio it was playful and an obvious attempt to provoke another banter match.

Sadly, Link had to leave before to much longer lest he not reach a safe place before dark.

“Oh hush! Don’t you have stuff to pack?” And as Link walked out of the room, Ravio couldn’t help but want him to stay longer.

❦

Ravio sighed, glaring as he put more rations and snacks in. He had the space! Besides, who knew how long this would take? What if he ended up somewhere with no clean water? Or if there was contaminated food?

“Mr.Hero, it’s not wasting food if it’s a good precaution. I’d rather have a bit of food leftover than you starving.” The man in question rolled his eyes for the fifth time but finally stopped trying to get him to give up on packing more food. Ravio decided to be a little cheeky now. So as soon as Link looked away, he slipped in a bright pink handkerchief with a bunny, tying it to a water skin so it would most definitely be taken out.

What did he expect? After shoving more stuff than necessary into the bag he finally handed it to Link.

“Alright I’m done! You better not be coming back fried like a baked cuckoo, ya hear?” Ravio pushed the bag into Links chest as he turned around, having just strapped on his weapons. The bag collided into him, and he made an ‘oof’ noise.

“Me? You’re the mother cuckoo here.” Link flicked Ravio’s nose, causing him to startle back. “No wait, you’re a rabbit.” He’s taking offense to that!

“Hey! I’m just-“ Ravio broke off. Something felt… off. He focused in. The magic felt weird?

“Mr.Hero? The magic. Something’s wrong.” Almost swirly. It was almost like it was congregating around a point… the floor? Ravio’s eyes widened in realization, and he made to grab Link. His hand was almost there!

“Ravio! Don’t-“

It was too late. Ravio’s fingers only just brushed fabric as the hero fell, far from his grasp and far from him. He couldn’t breath. Link was gone. He was gone. Ravio was useless AGAIN. Ravio couldn’t shake the hero’s expression from his mind, the panic in his eyes. And he…

He tried to save Ravio. He tried to make sure Ravio didn’t fall in as well. It seemed the portal wouldn’t let him though, because he stomped on it. The concentrated magic swirled but it was only like glass for him. He fell to his knees and banged on the portal over and over again, until it disappeared. His knuckles began to split but he didn’t, couldn’t, care.

He kept hitting the ground, as if it would spit him back out. And when that didn’t work he screamed at the ground but nothing made a difference. Eventually, Ravio couldn’t even scream anymore.

❦

It was an hour later that Zelda arrived, feeling the magic imbalance. All that she found was Ravio, his hands bloody and bruised. He was only staring blankly at the floor.

“Ravio?” At the mention of his name he slowly dragged his gaze upwards to meet hers.

“He’s gone.” Ravio whispered. He clutched his hair with bloody hands and tugged his hood back on. “He’s… he’s really…”

Zelda fell before him, tugging him into an embrace as the first tear fell.

#Gain courage #the legend of zelda #ravio #Link #a link between worlds #linked universe #legend linked universe #fanfic #ao3 stuff #ao3 fanfic #raviolink

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peanutbutter-doodles · 1 year ago

Text

I Wouldn't Change a Thing about it 18+ Mdni

Velvet Von Ragnar x Paul Stanley

⚠️ Warnings - Sex

Velvet's point of view.

_________________________

His Luscious curls all over the place Draping almost off the bed.

Well toned body drenched in sweat coming close in contact with mine every time making him arch with pleasure as I thrust into him.

Nails clawing into my back, gripping me hard marking me.

Bruises covering his body also when I marked him.

Moans that may sound disgusting due to how loud he's becoming yet there angelic too me.

His eyes making contact with mine, when we look at one another.

Screaming my name over and over again when he's Cumming.

He looked like a mess Yet He looked....

Ethereal.

Sprawled out beneath me, as I fucked him roughly within a inch of his life. Pushing him more and more deeper into sheets as we go.

Like I depended on it. Like he depended on me.

Taking him apart and putting him back together like always I do, when he comes to me all a mess or so stressed out that one more problem could completely break him leaving a broken shell of himself.

I never want to see him broken, ever.

I don't think I could handle that after spending some time with him through these months....wait....365 days....a year!?! It's been a year since we met and starting this with him, Shocking me.

No wonder, I can't stand seeing him down. Hence, all these feelings that I have are evolving every time were together.

Looking down at him, he's squirming with undefinable pleasure. Those little pleas coming out of his mouth, pleading me to go faster to why'd I stop. Taking me out of my thoughts.

It seems that I have stopped moving, He looking at me with those sweet eyes of his. Tears peaking out from the side of his eyes, i go to wipe em, making eye contact with him.

He stays still but he trembles as I touch him Gently. Probably getting overstimulated, I thought.

''You ok, Darling?'' I asked, softly.

''Yes, M-M-Mommy I'm fine...'' He stuttered, shaking.

I Looked at him with concern, He's telling the truth but there's somethin else he's not telling me. Somethin that probably made him come to me tonight. Stressed out and begging me to do this him tonight without holding back.

I never Hold back with him but tonight it seems that I am.

''Do you want me to keep going?''

''Yes, Mo-'' I interrupt him.

''Call me Velvet, Sweetie.'' Caressing his cheek.

He looks at me.

''But Mommy, wHa-.''

''Forget about it, dearie. I don't care, You deserve to call and scream my name as much as you want Starshine~''

He doesn't say anything back, He looks at me Lovingly once I said that.

''Really Velvet?''

I leaned in closer, A inch away from his soft lips.

''Yes...Paulie.'' Kissing him passionately, Closing our eyes as we intertwined ours hands together as we fall onto the bed once more, Continuing our fuck session.

The fuck session that now has become Lovemaking.

We made love Slowly, I thrust and slam my hips into him. Making him moan quietly. I grunted as I went on, enjoying his lovely sounds radiating from him.

Enjoying him more as I love him.

''VE-VELVET!!!'' He cried, wrapping his arms around me. Spewing out obscenities that I never expected him to say but I chuckled a little at it.

''Wh-AH! So funny?''

''Nothing, Darlin. Nothing at all~'' I cooed, Kissing and grabbing his curls hard as i yanked it.

The Night Goes on and on Till I finished in him, Steamy cum Rushing out into him almost gushing out of him as I pressed against his prostate hard. He twists and turns his body much as possible as I fill him hold him tightly, He screams as loud as he can.

''VELVET!!!!! He cried out, Tears streaming from his face as he too finishes, Overwhelmed.

What says next confirms Everything.

''I LOVE YOUUUU!!!'' He screams.

He holds on to me as I gripped harder and kissed him once again.

Pulling away from him, Breaking contact with him except for my cock in him. I Respond back.

''I Love You Too Paul, I love you too.''

......

Once I pulled out, I gave him a soothing bath. Some food for his stomach, he didn't want any at first but his stomach said otherwise.

I praised him, telling him sweet things. Stroking his hair softly as well as caressing him.

We laid together bare on the bed Once more, Tired and sated from the lovemaking.

He looks at me lovingly while I do the same.

He falls asleep before I do, I gather him in my arms holding him close.

his hair in my face as I nuzzled his head, I didn't care.

I never thought That I, Velvet Von Ragnar Could ever fallen for Someone.

Someone who didn't care that I was different from the rest, Someone who cheered me on when I preformed, Who stayed and helped clean up the place. Made exceptional desserts for me to just eat and probably was for other's but I don't care. Someone who was there and...

Yet,

I wouldn't change a thing about it.

______________

Reblogs and Comments are very appreciated~

Some sort of au, I've been thinking about.

Will talk about it later, otherwise

Enjoy ^W^

#mini fic #kiss #kiss band #kissblr #kiss army #okay to reblog #paul stanley #velvet von ragnar #velvet x Paul stanley #starchild #butter's speaking #mini fics #kiss fanfiction

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randomboo256 · 27 days ago

Text

The Missing: J.J. Macfield and the Island of Memories (2018) Retrospective

This post is different than my usual posts, hence "retrospective". It's more of a detailed analysis compared to a usual review of mine. Additionally, this is an expanded version with fixes and new details.

This game was made with the belief that nobody is wrong for being what they are. -from the title screen

Recently, I played through a little horror game called "The Missing: J.J. Macfield and the Island of Memories". It's an indie published by Arc System Works and created by the studio "White Owls Inc.".

As for why I was interested in this title, that's because I heard going into it that it's one of the few video games that primarily focuses on tackling intense LGBT themes in an empathetic way. There's hardly any games like that, so I was really interested in it for that reason alone. Primarily, it's about the horrifying mental health struggles that often come with being LGBT. So, consider this a content warning as well. This game is rated M for Mature, and it doesn't hold back.

Now, the game features many plot twists along the way and it was also meant to be a mystery game, so it's best to go in blind. However, I just have to discuss the contents of the game's story, so I'll save all the story analysis until after I discuss the gameplay. That said, there will necessarily be light spoilers in the gameplay section as well. Additionally, the intensity of the game's story might be too much for some people to be able to experience, so consider this post a way to experience it for those unable to bear it until the game's actual end.

Without getting too ahead of myself, YES I do think the game handles its queer content with a lot of skill and respect. You can really tell the creators knew what they were talking about when they were making this, which is impressive considering this game was seemingly made by a cis straight man. From what I heard, he had close queer friends who he consulted with in order to make this game, and this game really goes to show that anyone can write a great queer story as long as they're willing to listen to queer people.

On that note, apparently the creator in question is a famous Japanese developer who goes by SWENY. I've never heard of him before, but apparently he's famous for a game called "Deadly Premonition", which (from what I can tell) is an artsy horror game famed for it's both incredible narrative and it's buggy so-so gameplay. I've never played Deadly Premonition personally, so I can't comment much on it, but it's worth mentioning here anyway.

With enough preamble out of the way, let's finally discuss the game itself. The Missing is a stiff, realistic 2D puzzle platformer, making it pretty similar to games like LIMBO and INSIDE. If you've never played those, I'll give a rundown anyway. Essentially, J.J. (our lead) can only move very slowly in realistic, human ways. While she can jump, it's not high and it's not far, so you'll be mainly relying on her ledge grab. Instead of raw platforming, the game is more about figuring out how to get a normal human person past all of the game's platforming areas, all done entirely by solving environmental puzzles.

In my opinion, these types of games are very fun, but you have to be in the right mood for it. These are not twitchy platformers. Your character is intentionally very sluggish, and that's the point. If this game was controlled like Mario or Mega Man, it'd be boring and easy. Overcoming J.J.'s realistic human limitations is meant to be both the primary challenge and the main appeal of the gameplay. The slow-moving gameplay isn't for everyone, but it's definitely for me, so I really enjoyed it. Not every platformer has to play the same, y'know.

However, this game has a grisly twist: self-harm. This is where the game's horror elements start coming in. After completing the opening section, J.J. gets brutally murdered, without the player being able to prevent it. Shortly after, J.J. finds herself with a sudden new super-power: regeneration. No matter how beaten J.J. gets, no matter what body parts get torn off or mutilated, as long as her head is still intact, J.J. will live. Then, with the press of a button, J.J. will instantly heal her broken bones and regrow her lost appendages. However, while she might technically survive, she is not without suffering. Every wound suffered is punctuated with J.J.'s horrifying screams, along with every brutal crack of every bone. This is not a game for someone with a weak stomach and a low tolerance for gore. You WILL see this poor woman get her body ripped to shreds again and again, and it never stops feeling any less horrible. Fortunately, the game does censor blood and her internal organs to an extent, so it's not completely graphic, but still: this game seriously earned it's M Rating. Do not go into this if you're especially squeamish.

But nonetheless, J.J. must torture herself over and over, as the majority of the game's puzzles revolve around ripping yourself apart in specific ways. You might have to rip off an arm in order to throw it as an emergency projectile, light yourself on fire in order to spread some flames, or even destroy your entire body, down to just your head as it rolls around and hops, in order to enter small spaces and execute platforming challenges. Interestingly, when J.J. is reduced to a head, she's actually at her most mobile. She's faster, and hopping as a head gives you a tight Mega Man-esc jump, rather than the game's stiff normal jump. I suspect that aspect was very much intentional when it comes to the narrative, but I'm getting ahead of myself.

It's a very unique gameplay concept, and overall, I thought the gameplay worked extremely well. It strikes the perfect balance between realistic gameplay and unrealistic regeneration. The self-harming gameplay is just as addicting as it is brutal. The game comes up with very creative ideas all throughout, and I don't want to just sit here and spoil all of them for you. Honestly, I wouldn't be opposed to more games that took inspiration from this, as the possibilities feel endless. It's such a fun inversion of all your natural gaming instincts. I can happily say that the gameplay alone makes this title worth the price of admission, and that's without getting to the game's real selling point: the story.

For those of you who have either: A) Already played/watched it, B) Are too squeamish to play/watch it, or C) Don't care about spoilers, go ahead and proceed. Otherwise, this review ends here for you.

SPOILER WARNING (FROM HERE ON OUT)

We open on a campfire, as two women have a fun time vaguely bonding in front of it. These two, we quickly come to learn, are named J.J. and Emily. The two are having a camping trip on a small island just off the coast of Maine. Not long after we joined, their conversation turns romantic, and the two profess their love to each other, making a promise: to always be together, no matter what.

Suddenly, the scene shifts. J.J. wakes up to find Emily missing, along with an intense thunderstorm outside. Clutching a plushie, J.J. nervously begins to search for her, calling for Emily as much as she can. The plushie, we find out later, is named F.K., and it was one of J.J.'s first childhood toys, and she's clung dear to it ever since. After exploring for a bit, she finds Emily being tormented by a horrifying, yet strangely familiar, creature. Before J.J. can do anything to help, Emily runs off, with the creature chasing after her. Shortly after, J.J. finds herself in a field of flowers and windmills, while the thunderstorm grows more and more intense. Lightning begins striking the windmills that surround her, and eventually, they strike a tree directly in front of her. J.J. tries to avoid the flames, but fails. She catches on fire, and burns to death. Her precious childhood plushie burns to ashes alongside her. Then, strangely, a man that looks like a doctor with a deer for a head shows up, muttering strange medical terms. Lightning then strikes J.J. and she weakly calls out for Emily. Somehow, her regeneration power was then awoken, and J.J. healed and stood back up. As she sobs, she remembers moments of her time with Emily, as the game enters its title sequence (as well as its second act).

From here, the story takes a back seat. From now until the third act, J.J. is simply quietly searching for Emily as she explores this increasingly fucked up island. Apart from a couple brief cutscenes here and there, the bulk of the story is told via J.J.'s cell phone. J.J.'s phone is the pause screen of the game, and among its features is J.J.'s messaging app, where she has chat logs with Emily, her mother, three of her friends, and her college teacher.

Unlike the brutal horror gameplay, the chat logs are mostly records of calm slice-of-life conversations J.J. had with her friends. They mostly consist of the characters discussing their interests, their work, things that happened lately, and their ambitions. In other words, it's all just ordinary chatting, and that serves in sharp contrast to the gameplay. Beyond the arguable dark humor of some of J.J.'s injuries, the chat logs are also the primary place where the game lightens up a bit and allows itself to add some fun humor to the mix. Personally, I think the texts are all written very realistically, and there's even a lot of care in how they were all handled, such as every character having a specific way of typing. I think the texting app is a well-executed and creative way to bring in a lot of additional characterization and important character development to an otherwise sparse and silent story.

The texting app also serves as a great motivator to continue playing the game, as the logs are all blank at first, and you slowly unlock them all as you progress. Emily and J.J.'s mother's logs are unlocked by game progression, while the other four are unlocked by collecting donuts, the game's main collectible. There's 271 donuts, all tied to additional puzzles in the level design. Most of them are independently strewn around, but others require you to find a cardboard sign of a baker, which gives multiple. If you miss some, you can replay any chapter to grab them. To get the full story, you need 100% completion. Personally, 100% was pretty fun to obtain, although admittedly I did use a guide to get about a third of them.

There is one chat option I haven't mentioned yet though. Shortly after the title sequence, J.J. got a text on her phone from... F.K. The plushie? The destroyed plushie?? F.K. tries to cheer her up, but J.J. is confused, and acts rudely to him. F.K. continues to chat throughout the second act, but J.J. continues to be mean to him, assuming that he's not the real F.K. (cause duh) while also knowing that F.K. is clearly hiding information from her.

As for the other chat logs, they're all chat logs from presumably the past few months. As you unlock them all, they slowly reach the present day. This is how we uncover the real story of the game, over the course of the second act. So, here's your final spoiler warning.

I'll structure this section by breaking down every character, and J.J.'s relationship to them. Starting with the less important characters, and getting more important from there:

Phillip - A rich boy whose dream is to become famous. He starts off by trying to create YouTube videos reviewing cars and protein supplements, and ends up quitting college to be an actor. He rarely did his own class work anyway, instead begging J.J. constantly to do it for him. Based on that description, you can somewhat tell what kind of person he acts like, that being a dudebro who's obsessed with traditional masculinity and who's fairly misogynistic, not treating his many ex-girlfriends well.

Unsurprisingly, J.J. doesn't seem to like him very much. In fact, she never even gave him her number to begin with, as he got it from Abby. Despite that, J.J. does reluctantly text him back whenever he pipes up. She shows a general disinterest to his masculine hobbies and his attempts at fame, and proudly admits to not watching his YouTube videos, even when he begs her to. She jokingly tells him to adopt a kitty to get views from cat videos, but he tells her that getting a cat for internet views would be "evil", which helped redeem him a bit in her mind. After his first audition didn't go well, he was finally humbled a bit. J.J. decides to cheer him on, giving him the advice "Be serious, bold, and genuine." In his most recent text, he tells J.J. that her advice worked and that he got a part in a low budget TV show. However, J.J. didn't respond to his news...

Abby - A typical punk rock style girl who enjoys breaking societal norms. She's in a band, has piercings, rainbow hair, parental issues, and a general "I don't give a fuck" attitude. Teachers tend to scold her for her looks, although she deserves it somewhat as she tends to put off her assignments until the last minute, and then rush it. She often gets judged for her appearance, such as assuming she's a thug, and it pisses her off a lot. She reminds me of a lot of characters like Marceline (from Adventure Time). At one point, she tells J.J. a story about a girl named Sherrie. Apparently, Sherrie is a nice girl who can get a little "touchy-feely", and the other girls began spreading rumors that she's a lesbian and began bullying her. Abby is pissed off at that, not only because the rumor is bogus, but because there's nothing wrong with being gay. Abby tried to defend Sherrie by dumping coke on her bullies, but nonetheless Sherrie became depressed and began avoiding school. Abby ended up confronting her bullies again and it broke out into a fight.

J.J. looks up to Abby, and admires her boldness. J.J. seemingly considers Abby one of her closest friends, and often goes to her for emotional advice, while keeping it vague on why exactly she needs advice. Despite that, J.J. eventually grew distant from Abby. When Abby asked what was wrong, J.J. simply said she didn't feel well. In their most recent text, J.J. says she "needs to tell her something", but when Abby didn't reply immediately, J.J. changed her mind. Abby replied a few minutes later, asking "what's up", but J.J. didn't respond...

Professor Goodman - J.J.'s teacher for her product design class. At first, his texts were purely about school, but after J.J. started asking a few personal questions, the two ended up becoming good friends. He's a kind man who enjoys nerdy media like Star Wars, and he enjoys offering general life advice to J.J.. Occasionally, he can go on long rants about the movies he likes, even though J.J. doesn't really watch movies in general. He also loves talking about his wife and his teenage daughter, although his wife doesn't understand his interests and he worries over whether his daughter will get in trouble.

J.J. views him as an older figure she can trust to have her back. On occasion, she does contact him directly for advice. At one point, she asked "Have you ever felt like you don't understand who you are anymore?" and he told her that he has, and to not worry so much about syncing up with others. At some point after, he mentioned that he heard a strange rumor about her, and she confirms that it's real. He offers her to go to the school counselor, and says he'll defend her from the other students. In his most recent text, he was inviting her to join a special dinner with his family that weekend, as he figured that she needed an excuse to relax. However, she didn't reply...

Lily - A seemingly sweet girl who loves animals and, over the course of their conversations, makes it increasingly clear she has a large crush on J.J.. She works part-time at a pizza place as she has to pay for her own tuition, and she desperately doesn't want J.J. to see her while she's working.

J.J. finds Lily's huge crush kinda creepy and annoying, but nonetheless she considers Lily a friend of hers, and she even invited Lily to go out to eat together, although it quickly got cancelled. However, recently J.J. checked out a library book while spending time with her, and Lily noticed something unusual on the cover. She asked J.J. if it was a "condition" she's suffering from, and J.J. dodged the question. Not long after, J.J. confronted Lily about some rumors people have been spreading about her, and Lily sheepishly admits that she's the one who spread them. Lily tells J.J. that she's worried that J.J. doesn't want to be herself and that the topic of the book is "weird". J.J. tells her to mind her own business. In her most recent text, she asks J.J. to meet up, saying that there's something she has to tell her. She begs J.J. to respond, but alas J.J. never replies...

J.J.'s Mom - An overprotective and bossy mother who works for the Food and Nutrition Service office. She has a tendency to nag and go on long-winded lectures and rambles (I could never...) and she loves to snoop into J.J.'s business, despite her daughter's continuous protests. She constantly gets on J.J. about what jobs she should take, what food she should eat, how much she should sleep, etc. All while constantly reminding her that she's an only child and that she needs to keep up the family legacy. Despite that, she doesn't seem to view her late husband all that favorably, disliking how he would rather focus on his hobbies than further his career.

Before long, we come to learn she's also a bigoted Christian, naturally to our queer lead's dismay. Fortunately, her mother doesn't know that her daughter is queer, as J.J. intentionally distanced herself from her mother, as she can't stand listening to her, often complaining about her to her best friend.

Emily - A sweet, cheerful, and incredibly supportive girl, as well as a childhood best friend of J.J.'s. She dreams of taking a trip around the world, and she wants J.J. to join her on it. The two love to imagine the places they could visit together, even if it's unlikely. She also shares J.J.'s love of sugary food, for better or worse.

Emily has been by J.J.'s side since forever, and she's the only person that J.J. trusts enough to tell her deepest secrets. J.J. worries about Emily though, as she can't really do anything on her own. When they first met, J.J. didn't like that side of her, and Emily didn't like her much either. Well regardless, they somehow managed to become best friends. Unfortunately, Emily moved away some time ago. J.J.'s birthday is coming up, so Emily is planning on visiting soon, and the two began to plan a camping trip that they can go on together...

Actually, speaking of Emily, where did she run off to? Well, long after getting initially chased by that monster, J.J. caught another glimpse at Emily as she fled from the same monster yet again. Each time, J.J. was terrified for her friend and tried to follow. However, when she finally did catch up to Emily, she found that Emily is now actively avoiding her for some reason, all while saying vague lines about whether they're in a dream, who's dream it is, etc. Eventually, J.J. gets some phone calls from Emily, which are similarly vague and weird. Emily starts talking about how, when J.J. and her were kids, Emily shared a big secret to her at a clock tower and how she was so worried that J.J. would stop being friends with her. J.J. tries to reassure Emily that the secret doesn't change anything, but Emily ignores her and tells her that she has to "break their promise", all while spouting vague things that implies that she's gonna harm herself at the clock tower.

As J.J. tries to follow Emily to the tower, J.J. gets briefly chased by the monster. Speaking of, that monster looks kind of like J.J., and is holding a knife. Well, regardless J.J. does manage to reach the clock tower. Inside, she finds Emily alongside the strange deer doctor. As J.J. desperately climbs the tower, Emily continues to spout lines about how she's going to harm herself, until the end, where Emily bizarrely starts saying that SHE'S actually J.J.. When J.J. finally reaches the roof, she sees that it's too late: Emily has hung herself, with a second noose already prepared right next to her. Next to Emily, is a suicide note... written by J.J. Macfield. Upon seeing the sight of her dead lover, J.J. doesn't hesitate to wrap the second noose around her own neck. As J.J. dies, Emily fades away...

If you haven't figured it out already, here's the big twist: Within this dream world, J.J. and Emily had switched places. In actuality, J.J. was the one who talked of suicide, all while Emily desperately tried to stop her. J.J. was the one who grew distant and ran away from Emily, and J.J. was the one who told a big secret at the clock tower. As for what that secret is?

Jackie Jameson Macfield - A closeted transgender lesbian who kept that a secret for most of her life, only telling her best friend Emily. In public, she still looks like and identifies as a man, although she sees herself as much more fem in her imagination. As for what kind of person she's like, well she generally acts rather dull, and is usually quite blunt to people, but she is a kind and selfless woman overall, which you can also tell by the fact she's a vegetarian. Despite that, J.J. is also obsessed with a brand called "Sleepy's Donuts" and she often ends up eating donuts more than actual food. She also dreams of becoming a world class baker. Despite her terrible diet, everyone around her considers her very bright, and she's very talented at her college classes. Her favorite class is one of product design, which has been a fascination of hers since she was a child, back when she would stare at old clocks. She was even complimented by her professor for her custom design of a prosthetic leg, as well as her design for a knife.

However, while spending time with a friend named Lily, Lily noticed a book in J.J.'s possession about transgender people, and so Lily spread it as a rumor around campus. By coincidence, as J.J. became increasingly bullied at college, her bigoted mother finally discovered the feminine clothes hidden in J.J.'s closet, then afterwards read J.J.'s diary. J.J.'s mother then began hounding her via text in an attempt to "fix" her, and even tried to set her up for conversion therapy. J.J. then tried to explain herself to her mother in person, but "it didn't go well". As J.J.'s life falls apart (before it really began), she eventually started to believe the horrible things people said about her and began acting erratic towards Emily, describing herself as a "freak" that Emily should pretend that she never met. All the while, Emily continuously, desperately, tries to console J.J., telling her that she's not a freak and that she is a woman, but it doesn't work. Instead, J.J. starts irrationally lashing out at Emily via text, accusing Emily of just being her friend out of pity. Emily gets mad and asks J.J. if that's how she really sees her. J.J. simply tells Emily that she "doesn't care anymore". Afterwards, she writes a suicide note. Then, while hugging her favorite childhood plushie, she took her own life, using a knife.

The entire game since then was a dream that J.J. was having as she died, with her mind subconsciously forcing her to see what it was like for J.J. to suddenly kill herself from Emily's perspective. As the dream collapses around her hanging corpse, J.J.'s body falls apart and off the clock tower. It lands in a recreation of her college, where she then partially regenerates, and begins limping forward, looking like a freak. She notices Emily and begins to follow, while her mind recreates moments from when she was bullied. Finally, she reaches the roof, where Emily is cornered and terrified. J.J. then transformed into a monster, and ended up hurting a crying and desperate Emily.

J.J. then found herself back to normal in an empty void, and she got another text from F.K. J.J. tells F.K that she remembers everything now, but it doesn't matter now—she's dead, after all. She regrets what she did to Emily, and wishes that she would've done things differently. F.K. reminds J.J. that Emily is still alive, and that J.J. needs to help her. After all, if J.J. kills herself, Emily might follow. F.K. tells her this isn't a story about death, but instead, regeneration. So, J.J. realizes that if she wants to see Emily again, she must regenerate, and the only way to do that is to conquer her literal inner demon, which can only be done by finally accepting herself. J.J. thanks her plushie, and she takes off.

So as she faces off against the monster one last time, now with a new meaning in life, she regenerates instantly upon every hit, reassuring herself that she has to continue going. Finally, once she conquers the beast (in an epic anime fashion), she finds herself waking up at the campsite yet again, but now it's finally day, and the sun is shining. She runs back to the flower field, where she sees Emily again.

We cut back to the real world, where J.J. finds herself waking up as a doctor stands over her with a defibrillator. He explains that what saved her life was none other than her plushie. It was soaked with her blood, and it helped reduce the blood loss long enough for the doctor to arrive. Emily comes running into the room, terrified, hugging Jackie. J.J explains that she had a strange dream, but it was exactly the one she needed. Roll credits.

Via post-game collectables, we find out that J.J. and Emily continued to date, that Emily began helping J.J. in her transition, that her mother seemingly overcame her transphobia, and that (based on a picture she sent Emily) J.J. managed to achieve the body she dreamt of.

THE END.

So yeah, that's my interpretation of the plot. The gameplay itself obviously ties into it, with its themes of literal self harm and all. Overall, it's a pretty damn good story about being transgender. We barely get stories like this in general, let alone in video games. The fact this was made in 2018 and largely slipped under most people's radars is completely insane to me. Hopefully this post allowed some people to learn about and better appreciate this little gem.

I will say, there is one criticism I have of the game, and that's the acting. While it has it's pros and cons, overall the acting felt pretty wooden, especially when it came to J.J.'s actress. J.J. doesn't get a lot of spoken lines, but when she does she can sound a bit... off. Like the actress doesn't really understand the character nor the story very well. Maybe it's just me, but the voice I imagine in my head when I read J.J's text is very different than the one I hear in game. It's a minor complaint, but it can be distracting.

Despite that hiccup, I'd say that this game has easily become one of my favorite games I've ever played. I only wish there were more games willing to broach topics like this, but I guess that requires talking to trans gals...

...

Originally, my retrospective ended there. I had felt like I said enough about the game, but looking back, I really hadn't. Sure, I covered mostly everything that was in the game, but I hadn't covered the most important thing:

"What does this story mean to me?"

I mean, someone doesn't just make a highly detailed and emotional retrospective like this for free without having some kind of personal investment in it, right? At least, that's what I figure.

So, I guess I should reveal my own secret then.

I'm also a transgender woman, and like J.J., I've also gone through my own boughts of suicidal depression here and there. The simple fact is that a story like hers is extremely common for our community, and largely for the same reasons I see covered in the game. Except, for a lot of us, we didn't get to regenerate.

To avoid dating this post, I'll try to avoid discussing modern politics, but unfortunately, I feel like this is one story that will always remain relevant. As the world grows increasingly cruel to queer people, there will continue to be many J.J.s in the future. People who take their own lives after they felt rejected by their family, friends, society, and themselves. The most horrifying part of The Missing is that the story it tells is a dime a dozen for people like us, which is why it's so important that this game is highlighting that fact.

I find it interesting, in a good way, that the biggest plot twist of The Missing is that J.J. is transgender. The game waited until we both fully sympathized with her and until we all unquestionably saw her as a woman before they revealed it. So then, when we cut back to reality at the very end, and we see her IRL pre-transition body along with her masculine sounding voice, it's extremely discomforting. They basically created a simulation of what dysphoria is like. I can't say I ever felt that emotion from a video game before, that's for sure.

I also think reserving it as a twist also works well in other ways. By saving it until the end, after we've read most of the texts and experienced most of her backstory, we spent the entire time imagining a woman typing all of J.J.'s texts, even though she's not out to any of her friends. Not only does that again force the player to view J.J. as a woman, but it also adds an additional layer to all of her conversations if you decide to reread them, like I did.

I mean, I never publicly came out before for the same reason. I wanted people to just view me as a woman, not a trans woman. So, making her transness a plot twist really is perfect, in my opinion.

Even the grisly gameplay premise hits home to a lot of trans people. The idea of a woman who can freely snap any of her limbs off, even destroying her entire body when it's convenient, isn't far off from a fantasy that a lot of trans people end up imagining every once in a while. The thought of "oh, if only I can just chop off the parts that make me dysphoric" is something I've admittedly thought about every now and then. As the gameplay makes apparent, J.J.'s body itself is a massive hassle to deal with sometimes, so wouldn't it be nice to just destroy that whole thing and just roll away as a head...

Obviously that kind of literal self-destructive thought is insane, but suffering from dysphoria can cause us to imagine thoughts like that sometimes. Being transgender can feel like constant painful suffering, and that's without all of the external factors. Self-hatred, usually caused by dysphoria, is a key facet of the transgender experience, for most people.

For many trans people, these scary factors are just so much that we end up with stories like J.J. People who gave up on their lives before they even began to transition, assuming that they won't be able to or that it won't be worth it. Even if The Missing had ended at the reveal of J.J.'s backstory, it already would've been one of the best queer games ever, as it would've been an incredible, yet haunting representation of the worst parts of queer life.

But it didn't end there. It didn't end at the suffering.

Because it's a story about regeneration.

OUR regeneration.

The goal of The Missing was never to just remind trans people why it hurts to be them. It was to remind trans people that, no matter how much it hurts to be them, they should never give up. They should never lose hope. No matter what injury we take, we have to get back up and keep on fighting, because there is a future worth fighting for.

I think it's also interesting that J.J. saves the day, not by somehow stopping the transphobia that drove her to suicide, but by finding a sense of peace and purpose within herself. Rather than desperately try to appeal to others, she had to learn to be proudly herself, regardless of what they might think.

In the same sense, I think all the trans people out there who are feeling especially outcast by society as of late should take a similar note. Rather than be upset about how larger society views us, we should just focus on how we view each other, because that's one thing they can't take from us.

It's true. Being transgender can be really awful sometimes. With what feels like the entire world fighting back against us, it can be really tempting to just accept what happens, and die.

But there's always a sunny day around the corner.

If you quit now, you'll never get to see it.

Pull yourself together, and carry on.

Regenerate.

#gaming #retrospective #the missing

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portraitofadumbassonfire · 2 years ago

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Thots On NOPE (SPOILERS)

I get why this is divisive, but, Jordan Peele has constantly described the themes of the film as dealing with Spectacle. He is 1000% right, but I personally think that the themes have even moreso to do with exploitation.

When it comes to Ricky or "Jupe" I've seen so many reviewers saying that subplot had nothing to do with the film as whole, but it did in a VERY haunting way.

When Ricky is talking about the SNL skit that parodied a traumatic time in his life, he recalls it like a well executed comedy sketch. Then it cuts back to him hiding under the table.

I've seen so many videos online that have some sort of attention-grabbing title, regardless if it's accurate to what you will actually see, but the OP is aware of what makes people click on what's to be supposedly promised in the title or the thumbnail. They know what will attract a crowd. Not to be too graphic, but even porn videos will do the same thing, anything to get clicks & clout.

When Ricky starts the show promising a spectacle, he's used to the reaction he gets, hence why he always does the show showing off the "aliens" at 8:00 PM. Or at least practices the show at night, but the reason he does probably has to do with the "aliens" showing up at that specific time, hence why it's the first time we see activity from the supposed "aliens". (When we see the lights from the show when the sun is down in the first few scenes of the film. We don't know if it's rehearsal or just another show of his.)

He's willing to risk the possibility of an attack from a wild animal like the supposed UFO because he dealt with the attack from Gordy. He was waiting for the other shoe to drop. (like the shoe standing upright, which could be the "bad miracle" OJ refers to) He truly thought he could handle the intensity of the "alien ship" since he survived the attack and lived to tell the tale. He developed some kind of God complex that he could work around the danger of a "trained animal". His wife even said "Even trained animals can be unpredictable."

The people on set with Lucky are a great example. Who the hell stands behind a horse as an adult? Who's the genius who had different chimpanzees for a T.V. show with 0 wranglers? There are still people whom are dumb enough to go to the zoo and go over safety barriers, taunt the animals, or even hold their children close from any danger.

It's ironic how people are very obsessed with the concept of aliens, but if too many people can't handle creatures from earth, what makes us think we can handle the ones not from here?

The stars of the SNL skit straight up mocked a heavily disturbing moment in his childhood, yet he's still profiting off of the moment where this kids dress up as aliens to scare his neighbors as a joke and an intimidation tactic. (notice how their alien costumes look also like ape costumes)

Plus he said he was getting paid by people to sleep in a memorabilia room referencing multiple violent deaths on a TV set. Even with Oprah herself, when she interviewed the woman who was attacked by a chimpanzee and got her face ripped off, people in the comments criticize her for exploiting the woman instead of talking about how she moved on from the spectacle of a tragedy.

For the Haywoods, they're trying to uphold a legacy, they're the only black-owned horse trainers and their great great great-grandfather is someone whom had not been credited for their work as the first motion picture captured. For Emerald to be the one who captured a picture of alien proof as the descendant is SOOOO symbolic.

The cinematographer, Antlers, a white man played perfectly by Michael Wincott, didn't like the lighting in the shot he took so he took the risk to get a perfect shot. The TMZ biker had a whole helmet that reflected everything around him because who else would be obsessed with getting all of the chaos around them than TMZ? (The same publication that somehow managed to know that Beyoncé was filming the music video for "XO" & announces celebrity deaths before the family even gets a chance to.)

I've seen videos of so many disturbing events before, during, or after the fact that I can see what Mr. Peele was going for in commentating on. There's an infamous tiktok showcasing someone in the middle of a near plane crash I've seen reposted on Twitter, there's footage of a bear and a cougar in a circus attacking their supposed "trainers", talk show footage of a lion going after a toddler & almost biting the poor child it was sitting next to, the frozen and preserved bodies of those who've tried do climb Mt. Everest, and I've even seen a man who documented himself after getting graphically attacked by two grizzly bears. Yet the views on those videos reach the millions.

There's so many times a fucked up or upsetting moment in time has been exploitated to the point where it can be made a joke, a traumatic scene, or a topic of discussion, and that for me is what NOPE was commentating on. Some will not catch on with one viewing, but I recommend a second, or even third watch to fully get what's being told.

Films like that, that have a longer shelf life are what inspire me. It's a rarity that a filmmaker chooses to give their audience a challenge.

#NOPE #nope movie #jordan peele #daniel kaluuya #steven yuen #brandon perea #nope movie spoilers #nope spoilers #steven yeun

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gooddaysmeanwritingdays · 2 years ago

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A Smile Like Yours is a Rare Delight

Fandom: The Sandman Pairing: Dream of the Endless x gn!Reader Warnings: allusions to sex, Morpheus’s smile (needs its own warning), reader being overdramatic, all the fluff Word Count: 3.5k Summary: Even after a year of marriage, Morpheus’s smile still has the power to drive you crazy. One day, it’s too much and you have to flee to Fiddler’s Green. Dream races after you, and fluff ensues when he realises just how much you love his smile.

“Come ti vidi m'innamorai, e tu sorridi perché lo sai." (When I saw you I fell in love, and you smiled because you knew) ― Arrigo Boito

You didn’t know how much longer you could handle it. It was all getting too much. Even a minute more would be too much.

“My Lord, you must control your new nightmares.”

“Must I?” Morpheus’s lips twitched further into a smile, and you nearly died at the sight.

Lucienne frowned; her hands wrapped around a mangled book. “They are wreaking havoc in my Library.”

His smile. It was perfect. Your favourite thing in the world. And it was killing you.

All you wanted to do was squeal or grab his face in your hands or just stare at him for the rest of eternity, but you were in the middle of the throne room. That was the last place you could do that. Lucienne had come to the Dream Lord with complaints about his new nightmares tearing through some of the older books in her collection, and the only thing that had kept her from tearing through them was respect for her master.

You stood off to the side half-listening to Merv muse through the construction designs for the new aquarium. The other half of your mind was occupied by how perfect Dream of the Endless looked atop his throne. There was a tottering pile of books on the left arm of his chair and his coat was thrown over the back of it. His hair stood on end as it always did, and you wanted nothing more than to run your hands through it, to see just how much you could mess it up.

But his smile was what took the cake. You didn’t see it often, so every time you did breathing became impossible. Even just the amusement in his eyes when he was smug or teasing, or the way the corner of his lips would twitch up like he was laughing at everything—oh, you loved those smiles. And he wore one now, hence your ensuing death.

Because you had to at least act sane. And squealing over your darling’s smile in the middle of the throne room would be anything but.

So instead, you squeezed your hands together and took a deep breath.

Deep breath. Don’t be crazy. Don’t look like an idiot. Yes, his smile is enough to send you into cardiac arrest, but you just need to hold on for a few more minutes. And then you can take him away for as long as you like.

Like he could guess your thoughts, Morpheus’s eyes flicked to yours and his smile softened.

Nope. I can’t do it.

“Excuse me a minute, my Lord, Lucienne, Merv.” You dipped your head and spun on your heel, interrupting their conversations.

You didn’t wait for any of their responses, just darted out the doors. The moment they closed behind you, you took off. You paid no mind to where you were heading, just away. You just needed some fresh air. Somewhere to get your mind off jumping his bones immediately.

You hand closed around your pendant, and in a sudden swirl of sand, you found yourself in Fiddler’s Green. It had been a gift from your husband a few months ago; a drop of his powers etched into the ruby remarkably reminiscent of his own former tool. It allowed you to travel the Dreaming as he did and gave you a means of communicating with him if you were apart.

Right now, you were just glad it had allowed you to get out of there with your head intact.

You took a deep breath and let the fresh air of Fiddler’s Green into your lungs. You flopped down into the grass and let out a huge sigh.

“Everything alright, dear?” Fiddler’s Green whispered, his leaves rustling in concern.

“It’s been a year—you’d think I’d be used to it!” You dropped a hand to your face. “But I swear every time he does it it’s like I’m seeing him again for the first time. My heart pounds and it’s like I can hear angels singing. The world could come crashing down around me and I wouldn’t notice. All because he smiled.”

“Ah.” Fiddler’s Green chuckled knowingly. “Well Lord Morpheus does so rarely smile; I can see why you would have such a reaction.”

“But he is my husband! We’ve certainly done a lot more mind-blowing things than smiling.”

“I’m aware,” came the dream’s dry response. “I doubt there’s a space in the Dreaming that has not been christened by your…activities.”

You snorted. “How many times have we apologised?”

“Not enough, my dear. That image will remain with me forever.” The trees shivered before he cleared his throat. “What is it about his smile that is affecting you so?”

You sighed again, staring up at the clouds. “I just think sometimes I’m so in love with him I don’t know what to do with myself. I’ve never loved someone as much as I love him. And today it just seems that his smile is what gets me.” You stretched against the grass. “I wonder if he ever gets like that with me.”

“Perhaps you should ask him yourself.”

You sat up in time to see your husband appear in a cloud of hurried sand a few feet away. “My heart?” He crouched by your side, his hands reaching for you. “What is wrong?”

I am so in love with you it drives me crazy.

“Nothing, darling.” You leaned into his touch, smiling softly. “I just needed some air.”

Morpheus seemed unconvinced. “But you looked overwrought and overwhelmed. Tell me, what is on your mind?”

You looked away, your cheeks burning. “Nothing. It’s silly.”

It was silly. Saying it out loud to Fiddler’s Green was one thing, but admitting it to your husband? Surely he would think you ridiculous. You’d been married for a year and sometimes you still got so worried you would upset him, push him away. After all, he was Dream of the Endless, and you were a human—how could you not expect to screw up?

Especially since you hadn’t exactly met under the best circumstances.

His sibling, Desire, had brought the two of you together with the intention you would be Morpheus’s downfall. They had intended you to break his heart into a million pieces, but instead you’d fallen in love.

And by some wonder, he’d fallen in love with you too. Something he proved at every turn. He would take away your doubts and replace them only with the surety of his undying love. And it may have been fast by all normal comparisons, but there was nothing about your husband that was normal—nor would you want there to be. He truly was magnificent. And all yours.

He cupped your cheeks in his hands like you were entirely invaluable to him. “Do not hide your thoughts from me. Please. I want to know all of you.”

You make me feel like I’m the centre of your universe.

Your blushed deepened as you gave in. “I’m in love with you. Absolutely head over heels in love with you. I love you so much I don’t know what to do with myself.”

The worry in his eyes lessened as that beautiful smile of his came out. “I love you too. My heart is yours ever and always.” His thumb brushed a burning path along your cheek. “But that was not what embarrassed you and forced you to flee my throne room like Lucifer themself was chasing you.”

You groaned slightly, dropping your head awkwardly into his chest. “It’s your smile. I like it.”

The way he raised his eyebrow was practically audible. “My smile? That is what made you run?”

“I told you it doesn’t make sense,” you mumbled. “I just got overwhelmed by it and I had to leave before I did something crazy like scream or jump your bones.”

“My smile?” He sounded truly flabbergasted. “That was it?”

“Don’t tease me!” You poked his chest with mock indignation. “Have you ever looked in the mirror, young man? That smile of yours could stop traffic! Launch a thousand ships!”

He chuckled. “I apologise, my heart.” He cradled your hand in his and pulled you into his lap. He sat cross-legged on the grass, his arms holding you as close to him as he could. “I did not mean to offend. I just did not expect you to be as affected with me as I am with you.”

You blinked at him. “I affect you?”

“Do you truly believe you don’t?” His eyes searched yours and he let out a soft breath as he found his answer. “I am wholly taken with you. Every part of my being is dedicated to you and every piece of my heart belongs to you.” He dropped his forehead against yours. “You say my smile sends you mad? Every breath you take sends tremors through my being and just a glance from you could end me. Your smile alone steals my breath, and your touch stops my heart. Had I been mortal I would have died a thousand times over from my obsession of you.”

You wet your lips, breathless at his words. “Really?” You couldn’t believe it. “But you’re Endless. You’ve lived thousands of lives and seen the dreams of people a million times more interesting than me.” You swallowed down the sudden wave of insecurity. “So why did I catch your eye? What’s so special about me?”

Is it because Desire said we’d be the perfect match? Is that it? Is what caught your eye just Destiny’s plans? Just your siblings’ designs that you’ve decided to follow? Will you leave me when you realise the only thing special about me is—

“Everything.”

Your breath caught and the edges of his lips curled upwards slightly.

“Even before I knew you you fascinated me. The way you stand up for what you believe in, and for the people you love. The way you don’t back down when things get awkward.” He rested his forehead against yours and your chest squeezed at the absolute adoration in his eyes. “You walk into a room and you have my undivided attention. Even the way you argue with me when you think I’m wrong delights me.” He cupped your face to stroke his thumb over your cheek. “You caught my eye because you are you. Because everything about you is strong, unique and certain. Even if we were not destined to be together, my heart would still belong to you. Because, of the billions of dreamers I have seen, none of them are you.”

Your eyes filled with tears and your throat felt tight at his words. “Oh.”

He brushed his nose against yours. “Yes.”

You bit your lip, laughing slightly and swallowing back your tears. “You have a way with words darling. But I guess they don’t call you the Prince of Stories for nothing.”

He smiled fondly as your arms wrapped around his neck. His slid his face forward until his cheek rested against yours, and you breathed each other in. In the peace of Fiddler’s Green, you stayed in each other’s arms and soaked in every atom of devotion the other gave.

After a while, he pulled back, his hands on your hips again, to place a soft kiss to your forehead. “You needn’t have left, my heart. You could have stayed in the throne room. I would have sent everyone out had I known.”

You shook your head. “I didn’t want to bother you with it. That’s why I left. I didn’t want to interrupt your duties.”

“You occupy my mind every second of every day. You would occupy my mind even if you were in the farthest corner of the universe.” He cupped your cheeks and your eyes fluttered at his touch. “You could never bother me. I cherish every moment with you, even when we are both busy. And I want you with me all of the time. If I had my way, I would create a throne entirely for you to sit on and I would lavish at your feet for the rest of eternity.”

“I could just sit on your lap.” You shrugged like his words weren’t sending your heart crazy. Like you weren’t melting into him with every devoted sentence.

Morpheus hummed in consideration, his sinful lips curving, and you remembered Fiddler’s Green words about your…activities. “Meetings would certainly be less of a bore if you did.”

One of his hands dropped to your waist and his thumb slipped under the hem of your shirt, leaving a trail of heat along your skin where he touched. His eyes glimmered as he imagined just what could happen in such a position.

You fingers curled into the lapels of his coat, pulling him closer to mouth at the skin of his throat. “Lucienne might take offence if I strip you naked in the middle of the throne room.” Your lips trailed a path down the length of his throat, and you revelled in how he jolted beneath you. You didn’t know if it was your actions or the abrupt image you painted that had him reacting, but you weren’t going to stop. “Not that it would be the first time she’s caught us with you at my mercy.”

You ground your hips against his and surged up to swallow his gasp.

The taste of his lips against yours was as intoxicating as the first time. Better even. Back then you had been unsure of everything, but now you knew how Morpheus loved to be pushed back gently while you straddled his lap. You knew how he loved entwining your fingers with his and using his tongue to make you arch into him. Just like how you knew he always liked to be on top.

“Then I shall build her a new wing to the library.” He rolled you over until he hovered above you and began torturing you with his mouth. His hands cradled yours above your head and every inch of his body was pressed against yours as his lips passed a burning line along your collarbone. He bit lightly at the base of your throat, and you arched into him with a moan. “And I shall build her another when we are caught in the kitchens, because you never can keep quiet when my mouth is—”

“My Lord?” Far too close for comfort, Matthew cleared his throat.

Morpheus froze above you and you sighed. Just when the fun was starting.

“What?”

Matthew’s feathers rustled at the Dream Lord’s impatient tone, and you wondered just how awkward the bird was feeling. “Lucienne is asking, ah, if you’ll be long. Caw!” He shifted again. “She wants to know what you plan to do about the Nightmares in her library.”

“Tell Lucienne that I am comforting my beloved,” he growled, making you shiver at his tone and the tantalising brush of his lips against your skin. “And I do not appreciate being interrupted.”

His lips found their place once more at the pulse of your throat, and you threaded your fingers through the wild mess of his hair.

Unfortunately, Matthew wasn’t so easily deterred. “She said you’d say that—caw! —and she said to remind you of the promise you’d made after—‘The Nightmare of Aisle Seven’ as she put it.”

You blushed heavily and your husband dropped his face into the crook of your neck with a groan. ‘The Nightmare of Aisle Seven’ had been one of the more…strenuous activities you’d been caught in. It had taken a full month before Lucienne stopped glaring at the pair of you for that.

Morpheus sighed. “Tell Lucienne I shall be with her in a moment.”

“But—”

He lifted his head to glare at Matthew. “Leave. Now.”

Matthew escaped quickly with a squawk, and you licked your lips delightedly at the furious stars still in the Dream Lord’s eyes as he turned back to you. You cradled his face in your palms and ached with the need to surge up to meet him again. But you couldn’t test Lucienne. Not after the promise.

Like he was thinking the same, Morpheus dropped his head back into the crook of your neck with a sigh and settled heavily against you.

“Thank you,” Fiddler’s Green whispered to the raven as he flew away. “If they’d gotten any further, I was prepared to escape to the Waking World again.”

“It seems I have some subjects to banish to the darkness,” your husband murmured petulantly into your neck. “Maybe then they’ll end these treasonous interruptions.”

You grinned. “Ah but the threat of being interrupted makes it so much more intense.” You wound your fingers through his hair, biting your lip at the stutter of his breath when you pulled against his locks. “Don’t you think, my darling?”

“You are a menace, my heart.” He placed a kiss on your collarbone that sent shivers down your spine. Pulling away, he smiled down at you and your heart fluttered for another reason entirely. His gaze softened. “What is it about my smile you like so much?”

You melted beneath him. When you had first met him, he had been so distant, like he had to keep himself separate from everyone or he’d break, but as you’d fallen in love with him, you’d had the pleasure of watching him melt. You’d gotten to watch him lower his walls. And it made you melt with pride at how far he had come. Never in a million years would the pre-you Morpheus have asked for a compliment.

You stroked his cheek, watching in soft delight as he leaned into your touch. “You don’t smile often, but when you do, I swear my heart stops. It’s like the stars align and everything’s perfect when you smile. And I don’t get to see it often, so when I do, I just can’t help myself. I want to see you smile all the time. I want to make you smile all the time. I just—” you shrugged. “I just really like your smile. Plus…” you wound your fingers though his hair “…when you do that thing where you tilt your head and smile through your eyelashes— It makes me want to jump your bones.”

He chuckled a little. “Then I shall endeavour to smile more, my heart, if you like it so much.”

You grinned, scratching lightly at his scalp. He dropped his forehead against your cheek and purred ever so softly at the scratch of your nails.

“You smile more too.” He brushed his fingers across your cheek after a moment. “Since joining me here.”

It was true. In truth you felt like you hadn’t stopped since you’d fallen in love with him. Everything about him, about the Dreaming made your cheeks ache with how often you smiled. When you weren’t laughing with Merv and Matthew or smiling over new passages in the library with Lucienne, you were lost staring at Morpheus and his own smiles.

You reached up to cup his cheeks. “How could I not? When I have such a beautiful sight before me.” He leaned closer, his lips hovering over yours, before you pulled away suddenly, gesturing at the greenery around you. “I mean Fiddler’s Green is just so beautiful I can’t not—”

Morpheus cut you off with a kiss, his laughter rumbling over your skin.

After many many (and not enough) kisses, Morpheus pulled back.

“We must resume this later,” his words rumbled across your lips. “I fear I must leave you to your beautiful sight, my heart—I have nightmares to rescue. If I linger any longer, Lucienne may remove them herself.”

You hummed, not ready to let go just yet. “Surely they can hold their own for a little longer. I’m not done yet.” You pulled him down for another kiss, revelling in the feel of his smile against your skin, before you pulled back, sighing. “No. They crossed a line when they went after her books, it’ll be a miracle if she hasn’t ripped into them already.” You shuddered. “Never cross a Librarian.”

“Particularly not that Librarian.” Morpheus was as unwilling as you to leave your arms. “She once locked me in my room for folding the corner of a book.”

That was enough to make you pull back. “You did what?” You stared at him aghast. “I’d have locked you in your room too!”

He shook his head, laughing as he pulled you both to your feet.

Did he think you were joking? That was a book crime! The wors—

Your thoughts quickly broke off as you were suddenly distracted by the tantalising brush of his lips against yours.

“Hurry back, darling,” you whispered into his mouth.

“To have one such as you waiting for me, I will be faster than ever.”

A/N: I love writing his dialogue in bold. I love it so much.

A/N: I have quite a few Sandman fics planned, but ADHD does not equal a solid attention span, so maybe by season 2? 😅 Anyway, hope you enjoyed. This one has been sitting in my draft pile for a while

Reblogs and comments are much loved and appreciated 💖

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landosgirl97 · 3 years ago

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Big Energy - Chase Stokes Smut

A/N: So if you're looking where I'M looking in this photo, you'll notice a (not so) little something.. hence this fic ;)

I stood at the bar, eyeing him up and down. I knew exactly who he was, his reputation tends to precede him, especially on weekends. I told the bartender to send him a drink about 5 minutes ago and I watched as the bartender dropped it off at his table and pointed me out. I gave him a smirk and a sexy wave before turning back around and facing the bar, ordering another drink for myself. I felt a presence behind me but I refuse to turn around until I hear his voice. "How did you know what I drink?" he asked, leaning onto the bar beside me. "You think everyone around here doesn't know what you drink?" I smirk at him. "Oh, so my reputation precedes me I see" he sighs. I nudge his shoulder, "Not in a bad way, I promise. I've only heard good things." Suddenly, a song came on that I recognized and I asked him if he wants to dance. He agreed, letting me drag him to the dance floor. As the song played, I felt the confidence boost as I grinded against him face to face, singing along to the lyrics. Chase had his hands on my hips and swayed with me to the music. "I like what I see, A boss like you need a boss like me, Daddy from the streets, So he move low-key, Tryna rock that mic like karaoke." I smirk up at him as I feel his grip tighten on me and he pulls me closer. "Someone's in a good mood.." he whispers in my ear. I just smirk at him, looking him directly in the eye as I continue, "Blindfold, Tie me to the bed while we role-play, Can't skip foreplay, Kill the pussy cold case, I'm a boss bitch, But tonight we do it your way." His eyes go wide as he looks down at me. "Bad bitch I could be your fantasy, I can tell you got big dick energy, It ain't too many (people) that can handle me."

After the song was over, we continued to dance until he leaned down to whispered in my ear. "Want to go get some air?" I just nod, grabbing his hand to follow him through the crowd and out the door. The bouncer saw him, walking with us to his vehicle as we both got in. We drove around for a bit, finally deciding to park and talk on the top level of a parking garage. Nobody else was parked up there and we had security on standby. He laid his hand on my thigh as we decided to just enjoy the skyline. I snuggled up closer to him, due to the chilly breeze off the water and he wrapped his arm around my shoulders. "You cold?" I nod. He pats his lap for me to come sit, playing into exactly what i wanted. I moved myself over the center console in the Bronco, straddling his lap and laying my head on his chest. We laid like that for about 20 minutes before I got uncomfortable and started to readjust. Chase grabbed my hips, holding me in place. "Stop moving.. unless you want to pay the consequences." I smirk up at him, slowly grinding my hips into his. Chase lets out a low growl, grabbing the back of my head and pulling me down for a kiss. I kiss him roughly while he wraps his arms around my waist, pulling me as close as possible. I reach my hand down beside his seat, pulling the lever to lay his seat back completely. Chase's eyes went wide but he smirks when my hands trail up his abs under his shirt, eventually pulling it off of him. I kissed down his neck, sucking hickeys onto him. I was surprised he didn't stop me, but he grabbed my hair, pulling my up to kiss him again before hiking my dress up and over my head. He let out a groan at the realization that I am not wearing a bra or panties. "Jesus.. are you trying to kill me?" I giggle as I reach down, unbuttoning his pants, and pulling those and his boxers just below his hard cock. My eyes widen as his cock slaps up against his stomach, precum dripping from the tip. "Holy shit.." He smirks, "like what you see?" I just nod, grabbing his cock and pumping it a few times. His head fell back against the seat as he let out a soft whimper. "Fuck.. c'mon, please? You've had me worked up since the club." I rub my slick folds against his cock a few times before lining him up with my entrance. I finally sunk down on his cock, moaning out loudly as I could feel him all the way in my stomach. I could've sworn he was going to tear me in half. When our hips finally met, I let my head fall onto his shoulder and he massaged my hips softly. "You ok?" he asked, concerned that I reacted the way that I did. I nodded my head and whispered, "you can move now." He slowly started to thrust up into me. I winced as he did so, getting used to the feeling of him inside of me. Eventually, I sat up on top of him, hands resting on his chest, and bounced up and down, meeting his thrusts. "Holy shit baby.. you feel fucking amazing." Chase murmured. I let out a loud moan as I feel myself clench around him. "Chase.. i'm close" he nods, bringing one hand down to rub my clit harshly. I rolled my hips against him as I came hard around his cock. Chase followed soon after, groaning as he came hard inside me. "Well, everyone else was correct.. you are incredible" I tell him. "Hopefully we can do that again soon?" he asks, and I smirk back at him. "Round two at my place?" He quickly agrees and we drive toward my place.

Tagged: @adventuresinobx @wannabestarkeysgirl @maybankforlife

@samxslaughter

#chase stokes fic #chase stokes #chase stokes smut #john b #john b routledge #outer banks #obx #outer banks smut #outer banks imagine #obx fic

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filthforfriends · 3 years ago

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The Spare Room Scene

Damiano x fem reader

Word count: 2.1k

Summary: You and Dami have a fight at the recording studio over him being majorly careless. He has a short temper, you have an attitude, and things end up getting...physical.

“Yeah Damia, fine, I get it.” You silently dug your vape out of your purse and left the rehearsal room. You’d normally never fight in front of people, but Damiano had blown you off this morning and you didn’t really care what the band or a couple Scandinavian producers thought. You hadn’t flown to London to sit in a hotel room. He’d been so excited to get breakfast together last night and this morning he was just gone. No note, no text, no phone call, no voicemail, no smoke signal, no Hedwig, nothing. Your heart had dropped to your stomach for the 20 minutes it took to get a hold of him. Apparently he got called into the studio early and forgot. It was Leo that responded.

“Y/n, I’m looking at him recording right now, he’s fine. Did he really not tell you?”

“Um, no.” You were quiet. It was embarrassing that you’d freaked out and called everyone. It was embarrassing that Damiano hadn’t valued your sanity enough to tell you his whereabouts. It was embarrassing that missing out on morning sex played a huge role in how pissed off you were.

Of course Damiano called and apologized profusely, inviting you to watch him record. Everyone lamented that he was being an ass. But it was 2:15pm and they still hadn’t taken a break for the apology lunch he promised you. So you were sighing in annoyance and drumming your fingers on the couch to communicate impatience.

“Like I said before, we only have these producers for today. So however long it takes, okay?” Hence, nicotine time. Damiano pushed open the heavy studio door as soon as you let it swing shut.

“C’mere,” he growled, roughly grabbing your wrist and pulling you down the hall. He backed you into a door, then reached down to turn the handle, and stumbling into a carpeted room with a sink. Damiano refrained from slamming the door, but turned the lock angrily. He spun around and by the look on his face you’d provoked him more than you’d meant to. Well shit.

“I apologized,” he emphasized, slowly, crowding you into a corner. “Is this bitchy little attitude because I didn’t make you cum this morning?” You couldn’t meet the intensity of his gaze. “Are you really so desperate that you’ll ruin my studio time?” Damiano grabbed you between your legs and applied harsh, upwards pressure that made you mewl. “Huh?”

“I’m sorry, um I-” Everything freezes when Damiano undoes the button of your pants and rips down the zipper. Your voice, your movement, your breath, maybe even your heart. He shoves his hand inside and shamelessly cups your pussy over your panties

“I know you like being a pain in my ass because you’re soaked through your underwear.” Damiano twists the crotch on your panties around his finger then lets the elastic snap back against you. You yelp too loudly at the harsh sensation and he hushes you. “Quieter, tesorina” he purrs, so close that you feel his hot breath hit your eardrum. He strokes your pussy over your underwear, cocking an eyebrow when you don’t answer.

“Okay, okay,” you concede. Damiano’s hand moves back up to the waist of your panties, snapping it against your skin, torturously. Without warning, he sticks his fingers down the front, finding your clit for only a moment before pulling away. “Damia -” He hauls you in front of the mirror and stands behind you, left arm wrapped around your waist, holding you tightly against him.

“Look at yourself, tesorina. Aren’t you so beautiful when you’re needy?” He hums, agreeing with himself, before reaching back into your underwear. Damiano goes right back to rubbing your clit attentively, applying pressure to surrounding areas with his warm fingers. You can feel him getting hard as he holds you against him. He slides his hand between your legs, caressing your labia, before pushing two fingers inside. You let out a whimper and feel his lips on your ear.

“Normally you could never take two right away. But I’ve been stretching you out every day and night, haven’t I, tesorina?” Your jeans have been pushed down from Damiao forcing his hand into them, they sit below your hips. His thumb reaches up to stimulate your clit again as his fingers piston in and out of your pussy.

“Dami, Dami -” you gasp, eyes rolling back in pleasure.

“I bet you could take three if I made you. What do you think?” You nod vehemently, chest heaving. “So eager for me to stretch out that pretty pussy,” he cooed. “Little slut” He pulled his hand away and slapped your cunt in disapproval, then shoved three thick fingers inside. His other hand clamped over your mouth just in time to stifle the animalistic noise you released.

You tried to make room for him, but your jeans wouldn’t allow you to spread your legs any further so Damiano barely made it to the second knuckle. Once he realized the issue, he yanked your pants down to the ankle. He left your ruined panties, stretched out and soaking from his ministrations on. Then he proceeded to thrust all three fingers inside, again to the second knuckle and started talking you through it.

“Cara mia, I need you to relax. This doesn’t work if you don’t relax.” You took a deep breath and focused on relaxing your pelvis. Each exhale Damiano would push his fingers in a little further, until they were all the way inside your pussy. “Tesorina, you did such a good job,” he cooed. He moved his fingers in and out a few times before you lost the ability to stay silent.

“Now you.”

“Now me, what? Now my dick, you mean.” You whined, bending over the sink so he could take you exactly as you were. “Would you stop being a little brat if I I gave you the cock you need?”

“Yes,” you chanted in a whisper, trembling with anticipation.

“And what am I to do with these?” Daminao snaps the elastic hip band, cruelly. “I was planning to take you out to lunch and make you sit in a puddle of your own cum, but…” He clicks his tongue, “but with all the work I put into ruining them, I think they belong to me now.” You agree adamantly, anything to avoid wearing this pair of underwear again. Damiano reaches to remove the offending garment with both hands. You think he’s going to pull them down, but then you hear the rip of stitches and feel the fabric go taught. He rips the other hip and pulls the panties off of you, sticking them in his pocket.

You release a small squeal of delight when you hear him undoing the buckle of his pants and the rustle of fabric hitting the floor. You watch Damiano in the mirror as he focuses on lining up your anatomy. Once the head of his cock is inside, he thrusts to the hilt and stills. Damiano is a couple inches longer than his fingers and that last bit of stretch makes you whimper in relief at finally having him in the bounds of your body.

Your eyes shoot open at the feeling of Damiano’s hands on yours. He’s tenderly trying to unfurl your tightly curled fists. You hadn’t even realized you were tensing. His stomach is pressed against your lower back and you can feel when his abs and dick twitch at the same time. You lay your hands flat on the counter and look at Damiano in the mirror, observing you so closely. There are moments like this, and you don’t think he knows that you see. In his intense domineering, when he’s coarse, “makes you take it,” says he “doesn’t care how you feel,” he's actually watching your level of discomfort like a hawk. You’ll catch him between moments of scowling, hard-jawed machoism looking at you with an open face and precious eyes.

“I’m ready.”

“You sure?” You look in the mirror and smirk.

“Yes.” Damiano fondles your clit as soon as he finds a good rhythm. The objective is that you both finish ASAP so his pace is quick and intense. He’s being too rough on your clit, rubbing it at the pace and severity with which he is thrusting. He's caught up in finally getting some of his own release. You shove his hand away, whining and he immediately knows what's wrong.

“Sorry cara mia, sorry,” he pants in your ear. Damiano slows way down and switches to brushing the pad of his finger in a circular motion against your clitoral hood. You look in the mirror and cannot breath for a moment. Damiano is leaning his entire upper body against yours, giving you a little bit of his weight. His chin is resting on your shoulder, he’s fighting to keep his eyes from fluttering closed. His cheeks have a beautiful, healthy flush, and his rapid breaths are hitting your forehead.

“It’s okay Tesoro,” you purr, faces resting against each other. Damiano gets a hand up the front of your shirt, to find your breast. He pulls the bralet down and works your nipple, rolling it between his fingers and tugging it outwards. You careen forward onto the counter, gasping. He moves to the otherside, feeling blindly and gives the same treatment. The nipple play feels like a lightning bolt straight to your groin and Damiano knows that too. Your toes are curling in your boots, hands balling into fists again.

“A little more,” you moan and he massages your clit intently. He can’t fuck you hard because the collision of your hips will make too much noise, although you’ve probably made too much noise already. You can feel yourself reaching for orgasam, it's in sight, but all the emotional intensity of the day is clouding the purity of your pleasure. You’re getting so frustrated, trying not to tear up. It feels like you’re going to hyperventilate soon and if that happens your body will freak out and you’ll never cum.

“You’ve gotta let go cara mia. You’re holding on so tight, you’ve got to let go.” Damiano slows down for your benefit, and it feels like he’s really with you. He bends down to kiss the nape of your neck, nudging his nose into your hair and breathing in deeply. “I’m so sorry that I scared you,” he murmurs. The tears break and so does the wall holding you back. You feel yourself catapulte into orgasm, nails raking down the counter top.

Damiano speeds up again and pulls out, coming on a paper towel. You manage to quiet the sobs before then. Sobbing with your pants on seems decidedly more dignified than with them off to you peel yourself off the counter and do-up your jeans. The entire time Damiano’s trying to touch you in some way: face, hair, arm, back, waist.

“What's wrong? What's wrong? Cara mia! Hey, what is it?” He’s distraught.

“I was so fucking scared. Damiano, I was so scared.” Talking seems to alleviate the urge to cry a bit.

“I know, I know. Y/n, cara mia, I know.”

“No, I really don’t think you do. Seriously, imagine with me for a sec. You wake up and I’m just gone. No note, nothing on your phone.” Damiano’s expression becomes pained, but this is important to you. “You’re in a city you don’t know, that you’ve never been to before, okay? You don’t know where I am and if you did want to find me, you wouldn’t know where to look.” His lips started shaking and he had paled.

“I would loose my fucking mind,” he croaked. “I wouldn’t, I wouldn’t be able to...“ You watch his Adam's apple bob as he swallows hard.

“So call my friends, anyone that might know me in the city, and they either don’t pick up or don’t know where I am. Okay, Damiano? And no matter how many times you call, I won’t pick up. On top of that -”

“Please stop! I feel like I’m gonna be sick.” He rubbed his face harshly with trembling hands, his eyes were about to spill over. You felt ice cold shame.

“Tesoro I’m sorry, I didn’t want to make you this distressed.” You open up your arms and Damiano walks into them, fitting his face into the crook of your neck. There's tears, you can feel them. “I wanted to force you to have empathy for my situation and that was a fucked way of going about it. I’m really sorry.”

“What’s fucked is that you’re the one apologizing,” mumbled Damiano. He straightened up and kissed your forehead, squeezing you tight in his arms. “I’ll never do it again, I promise.”

“I know Tesoro, I know.” You nuzzled into Damiano’s chest, smelling his sweat, cologne, the lavender dryer sheets he used.

“Fucking christ, how long have we been in this room?”

Notes: started as a Thomas fic but the Damiano fans need content for their cult doctrine. This was me trying to write short and sexy but it became angst. Just like my life. Also might start using Italian pet names I like the vibe

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221bshrlocked · 4 years ago

Text

sweaty hands, reluctant hearts

Pairing: The Mandalorian (Din Djarin) x Fem!Reader

Words: 13685 (god this wasn’t supposed to be this long I’m actually sorry this time)

Warnings: Angst and Smut (my fav). Hurt/Jealous Mando -> Touch Starved/Rough Mando -> Fluffy Mando -> Shy Mando. Penetrative Sex. Oral Sex. There’s lot’s of sweat because exertion yall. Breeding Kink 😏. Slight Exhibitionism. Overstimulation and slight slight non-con because of oversensitivity. Umm, squirting 🙃. Dirty/Sweet talk. Spanking (ass and hoohaa).

Summary: He never thought the day would come when he’d hear you saying you wanted to leave him. Yes there was an understanding between the two of you that you were hired to help him care for the Child and to somehow keep the Razor Crest alive and working. And he knew it made sense for you to find work elsewhere now that the Razor Crest was destroyed and the Child was with his own kind. But he just assumed you weren’t going to leave considering it’s been a couple of months since he’d given the kid to the Jedi and you never brought it up. It hurt hearing you say those words, especially when he realized he wasn’t meant to hear them and that you were confiding in Cobb Vanth of all people. Turns out, all Mando needed was to see the Marshal eye-fucking you as you fixed the new ship and overshared your thoughts for him to snap and finally make a move. Hopefully he can change your mind...

A/N: Yall, this is post Season 2 so sadly Grogu is not here, hence the angst! Umm, this was a lot to handle because you know, that gif here. Enjoy ☺️

It’s been months since the events that transpired on the cruiser. Months since he’d given away a piece of himself to an unknown being. Months since he’d sat down and re-evaluated his life’s mission. He wasn’t sure why he’d chosen to return to Tatooine of all planets but he needed some time to think of his next steps. So much has changed over the course of the past year and it took the Mandalorian longer than usual to realize that he can’t use bounty hunting to fill the void in his heart.

One thing he did know for sure, however, was that he couldn’t have managed to survive the emotional and physical changes without your presence. Somehow, you’ve managed to make his life easier and by a whole lot. He has never felt this grateful for having a companion, maker, didn’t even think it possible to ever consider another as such. He’d spent years and years living by the Creed and never once doubting his way of living, but he found himself questioning everything about himself when you came in. It wasn’t that he was suddenly open to the idea of taking his helmet off or anything, it was more of a passing thought on what it would be like if he were to open up to you more, perhaps even share with you more than his name and an abridged version of how he became a Mandalorian.

He mulled over how he would approach the topic with you, finding himself growing more nervous when he considered how you’d react. You’ve never given him any inclination of ever thinking of him as more than your boss and he knew he needed to figure out a way to make this seem natural and not forced. Frankly, he found it interesting how you managed to read him better than anyone he’s ever met, and he wished he could ask you how you’d done so when he never took off his helmet.

Mando pushed the thought aside for now, cursing to himself as he dragged the giant piece of scrap you’d requested for him to pick up from Peli. He wanted to argue with you then, tell you that the only reason for coming to this awfully hot planet was to take some time off, if that was even possible, and avoid falling into the temptation of another mission. But he couldn’t find it in himself to say any of these things, mostly because you were the one that managed to procure the new ship for him and you were also the one that told him the two of you were in serious need of rest. He’d only realized the ship needed fixing when he landed and you told him you would get right on as soon as he picked up the necessary pieces from Peli. He felt a little out of the loop when he’d gone to her and found her giving him everything you’d requested for, and he knew you must have contacted her before you landed or else she wouldn’t have been this quick.

As he made his way through the quiet “streets” of Mos Pelgo, he thought back to what Peli said to him an hour ago. Had he not considered her as a friend, he would have responded rudely when she bugged him about you. As much as he wished to humor the idea that you looked at him as more than a colleague, partner, whatever it was the two of you were, he didn’t want to grow any more false hope, especially now that he’d already given up the one thing that managed to crawl into his heart.

Mando saw that you’d moved the ship behind the cantina and he chose to blame the heat for the way his skin crawled with goosebumps because no, he didn’t suddenly feel calm at the thought of you.

He shook his head from the intruding thought and was about to say something to you when he saw who was standing nearby. If there was ever a time where he didn’t wish to see Cobb Vanth, it was definitely now. The bounty hunter put down the scraps of metal before moving closer to where the two of you were standing. He was sheltered behind a shack of sorts and allowed his heart rate to return to normal before listening in on you.

“I don’t believe you sweetheart.” The Marshal threw back his drink and shook his head when you shrugged your shoulders at him and Mando felt his stomach twist at the endearment. Since when were the two of you on such a close basis?

“Believe whatever you want Marshal, I was only answering your question. Besides, it’s not like I’m actively looking right now.” Mando watched as you swiped the sweat rolling down your face with the back of your hand and swore when he felt the fabric of his pants grow tighter around his crotch. He felt dirty watching your every move, but he couldn’t take his eyes off of the way your muscles gleamed under the excruciating sun rays. He cursed the day you bought that garment and he recalled back to the first time he watched you work in it. Mando had almost tripped over the child that day because he never expected to see you walking around with the chest binding so visible to his eyes. It was worse when you reached up high for something because if his eyes lingered long enough, he could see your undergarment peeking from the low-hanging pants of the overalls.

The bounty hunter had to take a few deep breaths to move on from the inappropriate thoughts he was having and he narrowed his eyes at Cobb when he saw him walk closer to you.

“Are you ever going to tell him?” The Mandalorian watched as your expression shifted slowly to a more sombre look and he was familiar enough with you to know that you weren’t too happy with that question or the answer you were going to give Cobb.

“I- I don’t know. I wish I could tell him about how I fe- what I’m thinking about but I can’t...and I also can’t just say ‘Hey Mando, I had a blast taking care of the kid and getting hunted by the kriffing Empire. I fixed the ship for you so see you later.’ It’s not right and I didn’t realize it would be this difficult to come to terms with what I have to do. But I can’t keep doing this, it’s not fair.”

Whatever the Mandalorian thought you were going to say, that certainly didn’t make the top of the list. He almost fell back when he registered the meaning behind your words. You wanted to leave. You’ve been wanting to move on for a while and you weren’t sure how to tell him. You were confiding in Cobb Vanth of all people and relying on his opinion to decide what you were going to do. A thousand thoughts flew through his mind and he tried to see if he’d done anything wrong. Besides the whole thing with Gideon and Bo Katana, there wasn’t really anything he’d done that would inspire such a reaction from you. Not that those weren’t enough to change your mind about staying with him but it was all in the past now.

The sound of laughter broke Mando out of his haze and he turned towards you again, watching as you slithered down the ship, clenching his fists tightly when he saw Cobb grab your hips to help you down. He was torn between strutting towards the two of you and punching the daylights out of him and remaining where he was to listen in on your conversation. He had no right to do either, but he needed to know.

“I hate to ask you this question because it defeats the whole purpose of this entire chat but...have you thought of how he’d take it? Should you decide on-” You pointed to something on the floor and Cobb leaned down to grab it for you, handing it and gauging your reaction to his question as you continued to work.

“Why else do you think I’ve been putting this off? Of course I’ve thought of how he’d react. But I deserve more than...ugh, I don’t mind this, I swear I don’t, but I also can’t just sit back and pretend I don’t want more.” You motioned violently to the ship and to what you were doing as you spoke, shaking your head at the man smiling smugly in front of you before throwing out the tools and snatching his drink from him.

Mando couldn’t stand to be near you, not after what he’d heard and certainly not after taking in your body language and the way Cobb was practically undressing you without shame. He stepped back, leaving the scraps where they were and heading to the cantina to take his mind off of what he’d just witnessed. He walked in and paid no mind to the patrons scattered across the room, handing the man behind the counter more credits than he cared to count and asking him for his strongest stuff. He didn’t bother to address the judgmental stare he was receiving and took hold of the bottle before walking out again.

It was close to sunset and the Mandalorian walked until the edge of the town before deciding to continue until he reached a small hill filled with large boulders. Sliding down one of the rocks, he sighed deeply before taking off his helmet, the hissing sound instilling a sense of guilt deep in his chest. He was ashamed at feeling such an emotion towards what he based his entire life on. But he couldn’t take it anymore. His anger rose as he opened the large bottle in his hand, throwing it back until he felt the stinging drink burn his throat for a few seconds before aggressively setting it on the floor next to him.

Mando wasn’t able to put what he was feeling into a proper string of thoughts but he did know it was an odd mixture of hurt and anger with a tiny bit of sexual frustration. He couldn’t get the image of you sweaty and heaving as you worked on his ship out of his mind, shutting his eyes and throwing his head back to meditate back on the way your muscles clenched and pulled every time you molded two metal scraps together or how they positively shined when you carried things across the sand. He’d tried his hardest to set all of these feelings and rather inappropriate thoughts aside but he couldn’t any longer. Not when there was a chance of you leaving him, and perhaps to someone like the Marshal too.

Perhaps it was unwise to deny his heart’s desires for so long and Mando was sure that he’d met his breaking point because he couldn’t stop thinking about you. Normally, he was able to distract himself and force his mind to stray away from conjuring up the filthiest images of you wreathing and crying beneath him as he drove his cock into your heat. But he had no hold over his mind at this moment, not that he was to blame. He went from shutting his own self out to opening the floodgates, and there was no going back.

He sighed heavily when his thoughts shifted to what you said about him and he took a long sip from the bottle before turning his attention to the setting suns. He didn’t know what he could even say if you ever approached the topic with him. You’d been wanting to leave for a while now and somehow managed to hide it from him. All those nights spent running from Moff Gideon and other bounty hunters and you haven’t complained once, choosing to keep it to yourself. He wasn’t sure if he was hurt because you felt the need to hide something like this from him or because you were awfully understanding of how these complaints could distract him.

And then there was the whole thing with the ship. He had assumed that the two of you sort of shared it now but it seemed that you never saw it as belonging to you but only to him. And you went out of your way to fix it now when you didn’t have to. Mando didn’t notice his tears until he licked his drying lips and tasted the saltiness across his mouth. He wiped his cheeks and laughed at himself. When had he become like this? First it was the child and now you.

He wished he could take it all back, to have never met the kid or you. His life was simple and not complicated and now, now he was faced with the prospect of losing you as well. The bounty hunter dismissed the thought as quickly as it came because he knew deep down that it was better to have had the two of you in his life, even for a short while, than to have never known you. It wasn’t ideal but since when was his life ideal?

As the suns set beneath the sky, the Mandalorian looked down and saw that the bottle was still almost full. Not wanting to finish it now, because he might actually need it later when you decide to leave, Mando stood up and slowly made his way back into town. He needed to sleep, not to rest but to put a pause on his rather depressing thoughts if only for a little bit. When he saw the town come into view, he took a deep breath and put his helmet back on.

The town was quieter than usual and the Mandalorian found himself going straight to the ship instead of joining the others. He’d spent the past few days enjoying his nights in the corner of the busy cantina, watching as you won one Sabacc game after another without breaking a sweat while everyone groaned in annoyance at how well you were kicking their asses. But he couldn’t trust himself tonight, not around you and certainly not around the Marshal.

Trying not to bring too much attention to himself, Mando walked past the cantina towards the ship, already thinking of how relieved he’d be once he used the refresher. Going up the ramp, he was about to walk to the small, private room near the cockpit to grab a change of clothes when he heard a loud shriek that sounded a lot like his name coming from the opposite end of the ship. Mando quickly turned around and shut his eyes in exasperation when he saw you approaching him far angrier than he’d ever seen you. He set the bottle down and turned his attention towards you, raising an eyebrow to himself when he saw your chest heaving beneath the chest band. He averted his eyes quickly, refusing to think of you sweaty and breathless under other circumstances. Maker, he couldn’t go no like this.

“Where in the kriffing hell have you been? You were supposed to bring the parts from Peli hours ago and I have to find out from some kid that you just left them on the ground and walked away to- hell, I don’t even know what was more important for you than bringing me the scraps so I could fix the ship? Really, Mando, I understand that it’s been a little weird and difficult lately but I barely ask for anything and, ugh, maker.” You held back from voicing more of your thoughts, afraid that you’ve already gone far with asking him where he was. He didn’t really need to tell you what his business was but you’d assumed the two of you have come to an understanding regarding such matters, at the very least to ensure everyone’s safety.

Mando stood there in silence and took a deep breath before turning around and walking into his room, afraid he’d give himself away if he tried to respond to you.

You furrowed your eyebrows in frustration when he quietly walked away from you, anger rising in your chest as he came out and made his way past you to the refresher. Before you could think twice of what you were doing, you were sprinting past him and standing in front of the open door, pushing your fingers into his beskar-clad chest as you hissed at him.

“I’m not sure what happened or why you’re giving me the silent treatment right now but this is not how we deal with our problems okay.” Mando took a few steps back as you continued to shove your finger into him, trying his hardest to not grab your wrist and push you against the nearest wall. “We talk things out and we come up with a way to fix things and compromise if need be.” Mando’s back hit the wall, and he threw his head back to avoid your gaze, unable to hold back the chuckle that rose from beneath the helmet at your words.

How ironic.

“Did I say something funny?” You narrowed your eyes up at him and wished for once that he’d remove that god damn helmet so you could gauge his reaction.

“You mean we should talk things out like you and Cobb Vanth today? Or would it be different?” Mando’s chest tightened when he noticed the surprised expression on your face, knowing very well this was not what you expected to hear from him. He was a rational man, never once letting his mind give away to such simplistic thoughts but you’d struck a nerve and he could no longer hide his jealousy. Yes, it was jealousy. As much as he hated to admit it, that’s what he was feeling right now, what he’s been feeling all day long. It was childish and unlike him but it wasn’t going to do him any good if he continued to ignore it.

“I’m dying to know if that’s what you mean. You obviously don’t have an issue telling him about how difficult it’s been working with me and how you can’t keep doing this.” It was your turn to take a few steps back when you saw his shoulders push out and make him taller than he already was. He continued to walk towards you, throwing his clothes to the ground and almost apologizing when you tripped on your feet when he was only a foot away from you.

“How about this, let’s start with what you apparently wish you could tell me but can’t seem to find the right words to do so. What was it you said to him? You deserve more than taking care of a kid and constantly escaping the Empire and other bounty hunters? Or wait, how can I forget...it’s not fair dealing with this mess of a ship and you’re looking for somewhere else to go?” You swallowed the lump in your throat as the Mandalorian repeated back the words you voiced perhaps a little too loudly earlier today, already feeling your eyes fill with unshed tears at harsh his tone.

“I- I didn’t…you weren’t meant to-” You tripped over your words and almost flinched when he cut you off.

“What? I wasn’t supposed to hear you say any of those things? A little strange don’t you think, since you seemed to have a lot to say about me to the Marshal.” Mando should have stopped himself from saying the next few words but his heart was torn into a million pieces and it wasn’t fair for him either.

“Well guess what, sweetheart, the Razor Crest blew up. Moff Gideon is taken care of and the Empire isn’t after us anymore. Every bounty hunter knows better than to so much as look at me and...and the kid isn’t around anymore for you to take care of. He’s gone, I lost him. So if you were worried about hurting me, you’re a little too late for that.” The Mandalorian barely held himself back from pulling you into his arms when he saw tears rolling down your cheek, clenching his fists tightly when he noticed the way you hugged yourself and frowned at him.

“Din-” It broke him to hear you use his name, especially now of all times. He hasn’t heard you say it once in the past few months, even when the two of you were alone. It was the twisting of the knife, and he bit his tongue to distract himself from saying something he couldn’t possibly take back.

“Do what you want, I won’t stand in the way. Besides, I’m sure he’ll be more than happy to help you out with whatever it was you were telling him today. After all, you deserve more right? Deserve someone more than me...someone who’s willing to share a lot more than his name.” Not bothering to wait for a response, Mando stepped away and walked back to his room, not caring about the clothes on the ground or how hurt you must have been feeling from listening to him.

He softly shut the door behind him and moved to his bed, throwing himself on it and hanging his head low to catch his breath. This was not how he saw the night going, not remotely. He was hoping to ask you about this tomorrow in a less hostile manner and without making it seem like he was blaming you. But something about your words struck a nerve in him and he wasn’t able to hold back anymore, not when you were suggesting things you yourself weren’t willing to follow.

Din wasn’t sure how long he sat there in silence but the hissing sound of the door opening brought him back from his haze and he opened his eyes when he heard you walking towards him. You’d never once come into his room, not even when he occasionally gave you permission. You sniffed twice before approaching the bed and standing right in front of him and he was reminded of when the child would cry to try to catch his attention.

“Din, it was never my intention to hurt you. I was trying to do the opposite..thought I was doing the right thing by thinking about this before I could talk to you but I’m realizing now that I’ve hurt you.” Din noticed the way you were ringing your fingers nervously and held himself back from taking your hands into his to try and put you at ease.

“I- I only spoke with Cobb because he- because he noticed the way I was looking at you. He noticed how I can never seem to focus on anything or anyone else when you’re around. He- he could tell I was having a hard time coming to terms with how I feel about you...how I’ve felt about you for a while now.” Din’s heart skipped a beat at your confessions, unable to properly register what you were implying because he could never even humor the idea that you’d have feelings for him. He raised his head and finally looked at you, frowning when he saw how red your eyes were from crying.

“The last thing I want to do is to leave you, please believe me. But I wasn’t sure if you even wanted me around after...after everything with Moff Gideon and the Jedi. As far as I knew, you brought me on to take care of Grogu and fix the Razor Crest. We’ve barely spoken ever since the cruiser and I just thought that I was only around because you couldn’t find the time to tell me that you don’t need me anymore.” Hearing you say that you thought he didn’t need you caught Din off guard and he wasn’t able to hold back anymore, instantly taking hold of your hands and pulling you towards him until you were standing in between his legs. You swallowed the lump in your throat and maintained your gaze on his visor, hoping that he could see how truthful you were being with him and maybe respond, if only with just a simple word.

“When I said I deserved more, I was just- I swear I wasn’t talking about your Creed or wanting to see you. As much as I wish that was possible, I would never...could never ask you for something like that. I was only telling him that I might need some time away to maybe forget how...maker, to perhaps try and set aside my emotions because the last thing you need right now is for me to lay that on you. I don’t want you to think that you owe me anything because you don’t, gods you don’t owe anyone anything, not after what you’ve been through. But I could feel myself becoming more attached to you, especially after everything that happened on the cruiser. I want more with you but I don’t want to push you towards anything you’re not ready for.” Before you could wipe the tears away from your cheeks, Din was raising his glove-covered fingers and softly skimming them over your skin, and he hadn’t realized how harsh and loud his breathing was until he felt you rest your hand on his chest.

“There’s nothing between me and Cobb. And you should know by now that he’s...friendly, with everyone.” You smiled shyly at him before leaning into the hand resting on your cheek, nuzzling further into his palm when he swiped his thumb against your lower lip. There was so much Din wanted to say but he couldn’t find the right words that would convey what he was feeling. He was having a hard time wrapping his mind about your admission and the fact that you have been returning his affection for a while now.

Din didn’t realize how long he was quiet until you cleared your throat and let go of his hand, stepping away from him and looking around to see if you should just leave. Before you could head to the door, however, Din was standing up and moving towards you, his eyes searching your face for any signs of discomfort before he made his next move. Your chest was rising and falling a little quicker than he liked but he quickly realized it was probably because of how you were coming to terms with what you just said to him.

You watched as he took his gloves off and set them on the small table behind you, suppressing a gasp when you felt his warm, calloused hands wrap around yours before bringing them to his helmet. He could tell you were letting him control all of your movements and found it difficult to accept just how much you were willing to give to him.

“As much as I hate to admit it, I have been thinking about this for a while.” Din smiled when he saw your eyebrows furrow in question at his words. “Taking this off.” He saw the moment you understood what he was saying, not expecting you to pull your hands away from him and taking a few steps back until your back was against the wall.

“That’s...that’s not what I- Din, I wasn’t lying when I said it wouldn’t matter to me if-” He smiled at how defensive you suddenly were and stepped towards you once more, and you found it annoying that he barely kept a foot between you two, his natural scent hitting you like a blaster to the gut.

“I know.” Din cut you off before taking your hands into his once more, rubbing your knuckles to put you at ease as he continued. “I’ve had a lot of time to think about this and- it’s not that I’ll walk around without it now, far from it. It’ll only be when we’re alone, when no one is around.” He hoped you could read in between the lines because this would be the closest he’d come to admitting how important you were to him, for now at least.

“Besides, it’s nothing you haven’t seen before.”

That definitely snapped you out of your haze and you tilted your head to the side before asking home what he was referring to.

“I’m not sure what you’re talking about.” Din raised an eyebrow at your response. Have you already forgotten?

“On the cruiser, when I- before Grogu went with the Jedi.” His hands tightened around your fingers as he said the child’s name and you were momentarily distracted before realizing what he meant.

“Din I...I never saw you.”

For a split second, it felt like someone had taken Din and carbon froze him before throwing him on an ice planet.

“What?” He held his breath, unable to move a muscle until he made sure he heard you correctly.

“I never saw you. I turned around when you reached for your helmet. I didn’t...it was a moment with you and Grogu. It didn’t feel right to look at you.” You tried to maintain a semblance of control on your voice but it cracked a few times as you admitted to him. As much as you yearned to see him without the mask, you didn’t think it proper without his clear consent.

Din’s sudden intake of breath made you nervous and you hated how for a moment, you wished you didn’t tell him because there was now a high probability that he wouldn’t take the mask off.

“Cyar'ika, please.” you shivered at the low tone of his voice, finding it harder to focus on anything but the touch of his skin. Once again, Din slowly brought your hands to the sides of his visor, pushing the palm of your hands on the beskar and softly nodding at you. A sudden sense of relief washed over him when he saw the slight nod of your head.

Din found it endearing how your whole face scrunched up in focus as the two of you slowly pulled the helmet off of his head, the soft hissing sound as it unlocked making your hands dampen with sweat. As you raised the visor along with him, you couldn’t help but shut your eyes as soon as you saw the skin of his chin. Unbeknownst to you, Din was watching your every reaction and felt a little nudge in his chest when he saw how tightly shut your eyes were. When the beskar was off completely, Din took it from your hands and placed it next to him, swallowing the lump in his throat when he turned back and saw you were still refusing to look at him.

He reluctantly took your hands into his and placed them on his chest, hoping that you’d finally open your eyes without him begging you again.

“I’m sorry I- maker, this is..this is probably more intense for you than it is for me and I’m not making it any better with my nervousness and- okay. Okay.” You took a deep breath before allowing your eyes to flutter open, unable to exhale as soon as you laid your gaze on him. Din was probably unaware of how nervous he looked and it took you a few longer seconds to realize you needed to breathe again. You weren’t sure what you were expecting, the long nights where you imagined what he could look like fading into thin air because nothing, absolutely nothing, prepared you for what you were currency seeing.

His features were somehow soft but a little rugged, and you found yourself committing every inch of his skin to memory, filling your mind’s eye with every minute facial expression so you could dream of him when you fall asleep. It was oddly not surprising at all that he had a stubble, the scattered dark and slightly graying hairs across his jaw and above his lips making him seem older than he probably was. And you weren’t sure if he knew he was furrowing his eyebrows and then you realized he most likely didn’t because he was so used to wearing his helmet that he never had to learn how to control his facial expressions around anyone. And it was endearing how his nose flared as he continued to breathe heavily under your gaze, and if it weren’t for the fact that this was a serious moment, you would have leaned over and kissed the curved bridge of his nose and the scrunch of his eyebrows to put him at ease.

Din wasn’t sure what he thought your reaction would be and he felt his chest tighten with every long moment you spent without so much as a comment.

You were unaware of how long this dreadful moment must have been for the Mandalorian and you continued to study him in hopes of finding answers to questions you’ve wished you could ask him ever since he hired you. There were heavy bags under his eyes and you wished you were more persistent with him when it came to his resting schedule but he always seemed to wave you off whenever you told him he needed to sleep. Though you knew this stress had to do more with Grogu no longer being here and less with how often he slept. You had half expected to find his gaze harsh and far off but when you did finally meet his eyes, you found them filled with unshed tears and a multitude of emotions that you knew would go unexplained until he had the strength to voice them. They were a deep and beautiful shade of brown, ones you knew you’d never be able to turn away from now that you’ve had a proper look at him. And you couldn’t help but notice how their color reminded you of a Nightbloomer just after you picked it from its roots.

All of that, however, could not compare to when you finally let your eyes descend to his lips. They were a darker shade of pink, and you swore you saw them parting as soon as you looked at them. His lower lip was trembling and you wished more than anything to swipe your thumb against it if only to feel the soft skin melt at your touch. You wished that was as far as your mind had gone but the longer you looked at the curve of his mouth, the more you wished you could lean forward and mold your lips with his. It was even worse because you had a feeling that the stubble of his mustache would cause the softest of burns on your lips.

Din could no longer take the loud silence enveloping the room and he swallowed nervously when he saw how focused you seemed to be on his lips. He had some idea of what you were probably thinking because he was thinking the exact same thing but he wasn’t sure if he should be the one to make the first move. This reluctance evaporated when he noticed the way your eyes instantly moved to his neck as the cartilage moved and returned to rest when he gulped, and he realized that you may have been having slightly more inappropriate thoughts than he originally thought.

He was about to voice his worries when he saw your hands move from his beskar-clad chest to his face and he couldn’t stop himself from looking down apprehensively at the digits moving closer to his skin. You misunderstood his nervousness for uncomfort and immediately ceased all movements, returning your focus on his eyes to look for any inclination as to what he wanted.

“Can I- mhmm, may I touch you?” Your whispered question was too loud for the two of you and Din parted his lips to say something but noticed how dry his throat was and realized he couldn’t trust his own voice. Nodding slightly at your request, he waited with bated breath as your fingers rose to his face and found himself shaking with anticipation at the prospect of finally feeling your touch on the most intimate part of him.

When you were only a few inches away from him, Din felt his heart thumping wildly at his chest and he immediately shut his eyes when he felt the feather-light touch of your fingers on his cheeks. The harsh yet shaky intake of breath almost made you lose control and you had to remind yourself that, besides Grogu, you were the only one to ever touch him so intimately and so softly since he was a child. As much as you wished to wrap your arms around his neck and pull him closer so you could lay as many kisses on his face as you could, you knew it would be too much for him and that he needed you to go slow with him. He was practically shattering under your attention and you hoped he would allow you to do this as many times as possible in the coming days.

Din couldn’t put a name to what he was experiencing at the moment but he knew he didn’t want you to stop touching him, ever again. He decided that he’d spend every moment with you alone without his helmet and with yours hands skimming some part of him. The longer you kept your palms on his cheeks, the calmer his heart beat and it wasn’t until a few moments later that he realized his eyes were shut. As they slowly fluttered open, he was met with the most beautiful sight in the world: your own deep irises staring at your own thumb as it softly passed over his quivering lips.

“You’re...beautiful.”

It was a simple truth and you wished there was a more sincere word you could use to describe what he was to you, what he meant to you but your mind was overflowing with images of waking up next to him every day and kissing his eyes and cheeks and nose and lips and anywhere else you could reach.

Din’s hold tightened around your waist and you watched as he leaned forward until there was barely an inch between the two of you.

“Mesh'la, I would really like to kiss you.” The request barely passed his lips yet you were already standing up on your tiptoes and pressing your lips to his, finding them as soft and gentle as you imagined them to be. Din was afraid his heart would give out any moment now because nothing could have prepared him for the taste of you, let alone the boldness with which you were claiming him. He sighed into you, unintentionally parting his lips and pushing you harder into the wall when he felt your tongue sneak into his mouth and explore him. Din wasn’t sure what he should be doing but then you were moving your hands to the nape of his neck and tangling your fingers into his hair and he all but lost it. As you gently tugged on his hair, Din found himself mirroring your actions and before he knew it, the kiss was no longer innocent and sweet but hungry and needy. You sucked on his tongue and tilted your head to the side, wanting to commit every small detail to memory so when you shut your eyes at night, you’d kiss him in your dreams.

Reluctantly, you pulled back for a second to allow the two of you to breathe but Din didn’t like that, chasing your mouth and molding his lips with yours once more to be certain that yes, this was happening, and that no, this was not a dream. You moaned into the kiss, finding his desperate need to claim your mouth again more of a turn on than you cared to admit. And then his hands were slipping inside your overalls and holding you against his chest, the warmth of him stretching down to where you wished you could feel him.

This sudden intrusive thought and the harsh grasp of your hips snapped you out of your haze and you realized you should be slowing things down for his sake. Against your will, you gently pushed his chest away and tried to think of anything but the way he was heaving above you from the intensity of the kiss. When you looked at him and saw panic and hesitation etched on his face, you returned your hands to his cheeks again and lowered his head until it was resting against your own.

“There’s nothing I want more than to feel every inch of your skin against mine right now...but- but I don’t want to push you to do something that- maker….that might be too much for you?” You pulled back and waited until he opened his eyes again before continuing. “I feel like you just made a dramatic decision by taking the helmet off in front of me and- and you’re probably feeling a multitude of emotions right now and I don’t want to make you think that I-”

Din didn’t like what you were saying, frowning down at you as he grabbed the back of your neck and violently pulled you towards him again. You were surprised by the sudden shift of his touch, fisting your hands in his cowl as he devoured your lips once more, not really giving you a chance to say anything else. Biting your lower lip, Din abruptly ended the kiss and pressed his lips across your skin, nipping and licking at your jaw as he pulled your hair down until he had access to your neck. You gasped his name and felt his stubble scratch deliciously at your shoulder. As you moaned against the wall, Din couldn’t back anymore and bit down hard on your shoulder, smiling when he heard your breath hitch at his rough ministrations.

“Din, oh gods, Din please.” You weren’t sure what you were asking of him exactly and you hoped he’d at the very least continue what he was doing.

“Cyar'ika, I want to have you. I’ve spent many nights dreaming of your lips, your touch, y-your skin against mine as I-” Din hesitated and it wasn’t until you felt his fingers slipping beneath the chest band that you finally registered his voice. Fuck, how had you not notice it a second ago? You thought the vocoder was what altered it, made it deeper perhaps. But no, it only made it sound more intimidating. You weren’t sure what made you clench your thighs together, the way he spoke to you of his desires, or how strained and gruff his voice was as he whispered his secrets to you. You gulped loudly and hesitantly met his eyes, finding the soft brown irises barely visible, his dilated pupils letting you know what he was thinking.

Licking your lips, you nodded at him and fell into a fit of giggles when he leaned down and picked you up as if you weighed nothing, quickly moving to his cot and laying you down on your back before moving away. You were about to ask him what he was doing when you saw his hands swiftly move through the beskar armor. For some reason, watching his hands expertly take off the cuirass and move to the beskar of his thighs made your heart skip a beat and you wouldn’t dare move a muscle, afraid to miss the show he was unintentionally putting on for you. So busy marveling at his deft fingers, you didn’t notice Din slowing his movements and looking at you, eyebrows raised in curiosity when he saw how hard you were breathing.

You broke out of your trance when you saw he stopped moving, embarrassment washing over you when you realized Din had caught you shamelessly staring at him as he came closer to revealing to you more of his skin. You’d expected him to move on, or at least pretend he hadn’t just caught you licking your lips while staring at his fingers but no, it seemed that Din was very much enjoying the effect he had on you because his smile grew when he saw your eyes look past him, pretending to focus on something else behind him and not his hands.

You never lost his attention though, and he maintained his eyes on you as he removed all of his armor and took his boots off. You tried to be a little more subtle but gave up when he leaned down over you and pushed you into his covers. You wanted to ask him why he was still dressed but bit back the inquiry, afraid he’d misunderstand and move away all together at your question. He captured your gaze and didn’t blink once as he slowly undid the buttons holding the overalls and you realized you would have preferred him to keep the helmet on because that meant you wouldn’t notice how passionate and direct his deep brown irises were. You’d expected him to be intense considering how touch-starved and lonely he was, but you never once thought he’d be this vigorous? Ardent? Maker, there wasn’t a single word that could describe the way he was looking at you right now.

Din kneeled at the foot of the bed, waiting until you finally noticed what he was doing and raising your hips before he pulled on the pants of the garment. He slipped your shoes off and finally removed the article of clothing that made his cheeks blush and pants tighten whenever you wore it. He would eventually tell you that this is how you came to him in his dreams almost every night, all spent and sweaty in that gods-forsaken fabric that gave him the perfect view of what you were wearing beneath.

His focus shifted from your face down your damp skin and he breathed in deeply at the sight of your undergarment. Din almost choked on his breath when your legs parted for a moment, giving him a glimpse of the growing wet patch at the center of the flimsy material.

The Mandalorian wanted nothing more than to worship your body, kiss every part of you and whisper his devotion against your skin as he pleasured you over and over again. He’d spent countless nights imagining what he’d do to you if you were ever naked and willing in his arms and he was damned if he didn’t make sure you were thoroughly spent once he was done with you. He wanted to hear his name fall from your lips and he wanted to swallow your sighs and your moans as he sank into you all night long. And by the gods, he wanted to mark your neck and your arms and your waist, and nothing made him harder than picturing you doing the same to him, biting and nipping at his skin so he could wake up in the morning and watch the evidence of your lo- your touch on him. It didn’t matter that no one else would see those bruises but him and you. He just wanted you, in any way possible, sinking beneath his skin.

And then he heard his voice calling for you over the comm link just outside the room and something snapped deep in his chest. He looked up from you to the open door of his room and listened to the Marshal’s words. Your eyes widened in shock when you saw several emotions pass through Din’s eyes, the most prominent of which was anger, maybe hurt. Of all the times Cobb would ask you to join him for drinks, this was most definitely the worst of them. It didn’t help either that he was laughing over some inappropriate joke one of his friends was saying about your sabacc skills. It wouldn’t be the first time this happened and it certainly wouldn’t be the last but then Din was clenching his jaw tightly before looking down at you and you knew he wasn’t too happy. In fact, you had a pretty good idea which emotion won out and you hated how much it affected you, how wet you became as thoughts of the Mandalorian claiming you as his flooded your mind.

Before you could try and reason with him, attempt to tell him that it was just a game and that the Marshal’s friends were probably just teasing him, Din was standing up and stripping of his long-sleeve shirt, revealing his perfectly chiseled, bronze skin that had your mouth watering within moments. You noticed the few dozen scars littering his beautiful torso and wished you could kiss each one of them, the old ones and the fairly new ones, until they didn’t sting with pain. But Din had different plans for you and he didn’t give you a chance to question him as he took hold of both of your wrists and slammed them above your head. His hold was painful and it should have scared you how quickly his mood changed but you said nothing, looking into his dilated pupils as his nose flared and he growled at you.

“Keep yours hands there,” Din warns you with a piercing look and you gulp loudly before nodding at him in understanding. He removes his hand and kneels on the bed, eyes narrowing at you before they sought after your most private areas. He wasn’t sure where to begin. He’d given this much thought but now that he was here, he realized it was a more difficult decision than he anticipated. He’d longed to wrap his lips around those hardened peaks always teasing him through the chest band, lick them until you cried for him, perhaps begged him to stop because you were sensitive. But then he continued down the lines of your navel and found your parted legs much more inviting.

Now that Din knew how you felt, there was no reason for him to feel jealous. But he couldn't stop himself, wanting to be certain that you knew as well as he who you belonged to. He hated himself for having such primitive thoughts about you. You were your own person that much was made clear early on. But he could hope at your words, couldn’t he? He could hope that you were now his, and that he was yours. Maker, he was always yours. He just couldn’t admit it to himself, his heart reluctant at opening up to another.

Din was lost in thought longer than you liked and you moved your feet towards him, nudging his thigh in hopes of reassuring him that you were right here, in his bed, beneath him and at his mercy. Din’s eyes focused on your again and he looked down at the soft gesture, hands instantly grabbing at your ankles. You jumped at the sudden movement, trying your hardest not to whine at the painful grasp because somewhere deep inside of you, you wanted nothing more than to be marked by him. By his teeth, lips, fingers, any part of him. You didn’t care where you’d bear his touch, you just wanted to see it, touch it in the privacy of the refresher when he wasn’t around.

Din saw the needy look you were throwing him and he knew that you were willing. Willing to go as far as he wanted, willing to completely submit your body and soul to him, willing to do whatever he wished of you.

Before your eyes could flutter closed, Din was pushing your legs wide open and falling in between them while maintaining his gaze on you. He almost smiled when your stomach shook at how feral he probably looked. Leaning forward, he closed his eyes as his mouth latched onto the wet patch forming on the soft fabric of your undergarment, moaning into your cunt as he savored the taste seeping through. You were surprised by the boldness of the action and wished for him to lick your skin instead. But there was something erotic about the desperation behind his actions, wanting to taste you so much that he didn’t care what he was licking.

The thought was gone as soon as it appeared because you felt two fingers stretch beneath the waistband right before he ripped it off of your body, shoving the torn fabric in his nose and taking a long whiff of it before humming in approval. Your eyes widened in surprise at the filthiness of his action, hands shaking above you when he threw your panties expertly into his helmet. The thought of knowing that your scent could potentially stick to the inside of his helmet as he walked around twisted your insides and you whined shamelessly at him, wishing he could just take what he wanted.

“Your sounds belong to me,” Din spoke with a commanding voice as he sank in between your thighs again, his tongue dragging across your folds so deliciously hard until he pulled away, leaving a trail of saliva behind. “Your arousal belongs to me,” his hands went to your thighs and he squeezed, knowing fully well there would be bruises dawning your beautiful, smooth body the following morning. Again, you fought to keep your eyes open, wanting to commit every second to memory but finding it difficult to focus on him and not the pleasure zapping down your back. “And I will be damned if this cunt,” Din let go of one of your thighs, pulling his tongue away from your core right before the palm of his hand landed a slap straight on your clit, “doesn’t belong to me either.” You cried out his name, legs shaking violently at the pain shooting through your clit. Din didn’t give you a moment to relax back down on the covers, spanking the outer folds of your pussy twice more consecutively before he replaced the harsh touch with his cooling tongue. Tears trailed down your cheeks as he fucked you with his tongue and lapped at you like you were the only source of water on this gods-forsaken planet. He rotated between soft, quick licks to long, harsh ones, occasionally sucking on your clit and grazing his teeth on the bundle of nerves until he was sure you were going crazy.

“D-Din oh maker, please. Stop I- slow down.” His touches were far from gentle and the pleasure blurred into pain as you tried to reach that delicious peak you’ve longed for ever since you harbored feelings for the man above you. But he was making it difficult, his needy and erratic movements making it near impossible for you to dive into the lake of pleasure. You should have known that the Mandalorian was as intense in bed as he was in every other aspect of his life. You shut your thighs around his head, wanting to push him away as his teeth continued to graze against your wet folds and nip at the pulsating nub.

“M-Mando...I can’t.” You couldn’t take it anymore, hands moving to his hair and fisting in the beautiful brown locks as you tried to push him away. As soon as Din felt the tight grasp on his hair, he snarled at you, pushing up on his knees and bending your body along with him until the only thing resting on the bed was your neck and your shoulders. You cried out for him, begging him to give you release but it only drove him mad with lust. His eyes locked on yours, daring you to look away from him as his fingers dug into your butt cheeks and pushed your cunt into his mouth.

Din pulled away for a split second, biting your inner thighs to grab your attention.

“You will take what I give you ner Cyar’ika.” You saw a hint of darkness in his soulful brown eyes, and shivered at the mere implications of what he had in mind for you. Din sucked and licked at your folds like a crazed man, feeling your legs shaking on his shoulders. He pulled away for a second, and you had no time to beg him to be gentle as he slapped your heated core three times again, hissing when you shut your eyes and bucked against him, your juices drenching his face and chest, leaking down your back as he smiled before taking your cunt into his mouth one last time to prolong your pleasure. You were too busy trying to remain sane to realize what had just happened and Din slowly lowered you back onto the wet covers before letting go of you. You were panting beneath him, stomach fluttering from the force of your release and chest heaving as you tried to fill your lungs with air.

When you opened your eyes and looked at Din, your eyes widened in horror when you saw his glistening skin, finally realizing what he'd just done to you. You flushed under the scrutiny of Din’s gaze, gasping as he wiped his mouth and jaw with the back of his hand as he looked down and chuckled at the wet spot beneath his knees. You quickly shut your legs and tried to crawl away from him but Din was faster, grabbing your ankle and pulling you back to him, the show of strength already making your cunt clench around nothing again.

“You do not run from me Ad’ika...nor hide from me ever again. I own your body, your skin, the cum still leaking out of this sweet cunt.” His words were filthy and you didn’t know how to react to this new possessiveness he was showing. He pushed open your thighs and fell in between him, bringing his chest flush against yours and kissing the breath out of you, not bothering to be gentle as his fingers twisted and pinched at your nipples. You clawed at his back, wanting more of him but not knowing if you would be able to take any more of what he was offering.

He pulled away suddenly, his jaw clenching tightly as he took one look at the hands wrapped around his back.

“Did I not tell you to not move your hands sweet girl?” He whispered against your lips, breathing in the air leaving your lungs as he pecked the corner of your mouth before flipping you over on your stomach.

“I- I’m sorry...it was just t-too much and-” You couldn’t finish the rest of the sentence, screaming against the covers as you felt Din’s palm land on your ass. You looked back and saw him eyeing your reddening skin, looking up at you and smiling as he treated the other side with the same kindness. Four more times his hands smacked your ass and you were ashamed at how aroused his violent actions made you. When he snuck his fingers in between your thighs and swiped haphazardly at your folds, you moaned and bit into your wrist.

“Filthy sweet girl,” Din whispered more to himself than you before he fisted his hand in your hair and pulled you flush to his chest, the slide of your dampened back against his sweaty chest bringing him more pleasure than he would have liked to admit because not a few hours ago, he was picturing your sweaty, glistening skin beneath him. And now that he had you here, he was going to make the best of it.

“Mando, oh Mando-” As much as he loved hearing you scream his nickname in the throws of passion, he wished more to hear his given name fall from your lips.

“My name...scream my name sweet girl. Let the stars know who pleasures you Cyare.” Din kissed your shoulder before biting into the sweaty flesh, the hand in your hair letting go right before wrapping softly around your throat and pressing you harder against him. Your hands twisted back to try and grab his hair but he immediately took your wrist and twisted it until it was behind you, between your back and his chest.

“Ahh Din…” You wanted to beg him to allow you to touch him, tell him that you were yearning to touch him as much as he was in need of touching you. But you had a feeling that this wasn’t true, and that this was his way of being certain that you weren’t going to leave him. That you were his.

If only he knew that you have already belonged to him. Long before tonight.

You felt each breath leave your lungs as Din tightened his grasp around your throat and you parted your lips to moan his name, only to feel his tongue shamelessly licking into your mouth. So distracted by the desperation in this kiss, you didn’t notice the fingers trailing down your chest and digging into your skin until the palm of his hand softly cupped one breast. Din teased you with feather light touches, flicking at one nipple before moving to the other and circling around it until it hardened. He continued to swallow your noises, sucking on your tongue to quiet you as he pinched your nipples. You twisted in his arms, wanting to reach for him again but knowing that he would probably pull your hand away.

When Din pulled away to allow you to breathe, you panted and finally opened your eyes, not daring to look away as he kept you motionless with his gaze. Din watched as you tried to form a coherent thought, waiting until you parted your lips to speak to him before reaching down and cupping your quivering cunt as he broke the silence.

“This belongs to me,” your breath hitched when Din pressed the palm of his hand against you, not quite applying pressure on your clit but just enough to hold your focus. “Only I get to touch you, kiss you, watch you as you come undone in my arms.” You nodded briefly at him, continuing to hold eye contact as he began to increase his actions. “No one else will ever have you Cyar'ika. No one but me.” He slipped two fingers past your wet folds and rubbed against your walls, humming in approval when he felt you flutter around him the harder he shoved his fingers inside you.

“I’m yours Din, y-yours. Whatever you want, oh gods please more...need more, Din you make me f-feel so good.” Din keened at your words, curling his hand until his palm was passing deliciously over your clit as his fingers picked up the pace.

“That’s right sweet girl, you’re mine. Mine to fuck, mine to take whenever I want...mine to-” Din hesitated for a second, unable to voice his heart to you even though you’ve bared your soul for him. “Pal'vut at kar'taylir darasuum...kriffing gods you’re wet, so wet for me. Come on, cum for me again ner Cyare. Show me how good I make you feel. Show me how needy this little cunt is, fuck- I...can’t want to have you wrapped around my cock little one. Can’t wait to sink in this pussy, my sweet tight cunt, mark you with my seed, over and over again...fuck a load in you all night long till you can’t feel anything but my cum dripping down your thighs. Shit, I need you to cum, now!” Your mind became foggy with pleasure, unable to focus on anything but the words whispered into your ears as his thick fingers fucked into you. You grabbed the wrist of the hand wrapped around your throat, digging your nails into his skin as you came around his fingers. You almost fell forwards but Din held you flush against him, continuing to drive his digits into you and rub at your clit with this thumb until you were sobbing in his arms.

“Beautiful,” Din kissed your shoulder as he slowly inched his hands away from you before laying you down slowly. His eyes took in the flushed, wet skin of your back, chuckling with pride when he saw your legs shaking as little sobs escaped your lips. Your breaths came in shallow and quick, and you tried to silence your whines by biting into your wrists but then you felt Din slide his hand back and forth on your back as he laid next to you and you shivered under his touch because from the way he was moving closer to you and touching you, there was no way he was done just yet.

“You’re all I think about, every waking moment. It’s difficult to focus on anything else when you’re always in my mind Cyar'ika. I- I burn for you, for your lips to caress mine every moment, your eyes to never leave mine as I brand you, your skin against my own as you mark me with your touch. I- maker, I cannot think of a life without you here, with me…” Din thought he would have to force himself to say such things but he found it remarkably easy now that he had you here, responding so openly and shamelessly to him.

“Din,” you turned your head and shifted towards him, kissing the hand resting between the two of you before leaning your forehead against his and shutting your eyes. “I’m not going anywhere. I’m staying right here, for as long as you’ll have me.” Din ceased all movement at your words and he looked away from where he was stroking your back, meeting your eyes and furrowing his eyebrows before you felt him grab your arm and pull you on top of him. You surprised gasp died in your throat when you felt Din wrap his arms around your back and bring you against him until you could feel his chest hairs tickling your nipples. You could feel his cock jutting against your core through his pants and as you rested your hands on his chest and looked to him, you saw the frown ease from his expression, replaced with something akin to reverence.

“I will have you until my dying breath Mesh’la. Let me show you how much I want you.” The force of his declaration hit you instantly and you pressed your lips against his just as you felt him rid himself of his pants. Din’s hands were roaming your back and you felt bolder with every caress, combing your fingers into his hair and pulling on it as he squeezed your ass and bucked into you. The growl emanating from his chest shot straight to your core and you raised yourself from him for a moment.

“Din, I want you. Crave to feel you inside me. Please, do it fast and don’t- don’t be gentle. Show me, show me how much you lo- want me.” Din’s heart skipped a beat at your words and he wasted no time, taking hold of his cock and teasing your clit with his leaking tip before slowly inching inside you. You shut your eyes and dug your nails into the back of his neck as he continued to sheath his dick deeper in your cunt. You could feel every ridge and pulsating vein dragging against your inner walls, finally allowing your lungs to breathe as you felt him nudge and twitch against that soft, spongy spot in your core.

Neither of you moved for a few moments, with Din trying to wrap his mind around finally becoming one with you and feeling you clench so sweetly around him. He was torn between fucking up into you without mercy and taking it nice and slow until he pushed you over the edge again. But then you were gyrating your hips and sighing his name on his cheek and he knew what he wanted.

Planting his feet on the damp covers, Din held you flush against him with one arm while resting his other hand on your thigh, nuzzling into the crook of your neck as he snapped his hips up before sinking into you again. You let out a surprised sob and rested your forehead against his shoulder, whispering more pleas against his skin and begging him to move.

The usually quiet man breathed the sweetest wishes in your ears, thrusting up into you with immense force that made you clench tighter around him. “Ni copad gar an te ca'nara Ad’ika, ni vercopa be gar anay ca. You have made a home for yourself inside my heart.” Din felt your shaky breath blow on his neck and it drove him mad with lust because he wanted to have you reacting to his touch so wantonly every minute of every day. His grip only tightened around you and he prayed you wouldn’t mind the bruises that would surely color your skin in the next few hours. He wasn’t planning on being gentle tonight, perhaps later, but not tonight, and he was going to ensure his touch would be visible for anyone that would speak with you tomorrow. Thoughts of the Marshal passed through his mind’s eye and he growled, pumping his cock into you harshly for some reassurance. You cried out his name over and over again, feeling your skin heat up at the declarations of love he was peppering on your skin because even though his words were gentle, his touches were far from it.

The squelching sounds of your cunt flooding Din’s thighs as he drove himself into you should have embarrassed you but you could tell he enjoyed knowing how wet you were for him from the way he continued to quicken the pace just to hear your juices flowing over him. His grip on you was becoming more painful the more you moved against each other but you couldn’t find it in yourself to let him know. He was letting go, showing you how much he wanted you, how hard he was for you, and you weren’t about to make him feel conscious over his affection.

“Maker...oh Din, Din I- you feel so good inside me. Filling me up like no one else. Could feel you so deep, gods, could feel you everywhere Din please- don’t stop. Don’t fucking stop, I need it. Need you, want you- want you to mark me, d-do whatever you want with me.” You had no hold over your own speech and weren’t sure if you were making any sense but Din moaned each time you praised him.

“Good girl, sweet girl...taking my cock so well, kriffing hell. Your- your pussy is squeezing the fuck out of me..could feel every tight inch of you stroking my cock Cyar’ika. Ah pfassk...you’re- you’re perfection.” Din moved the hand around your back up to your neck, pulling on your hair and pressing his lips with yours as his cock throbbed inside you. You whined as his tongue roughly swirled around your own, barely able to breathe as he continued to snap his hips against you and suddenly feeling a rush of relief as his navel rubbed at your clit until you came around him. Din broke the kiss, screaming expletives in his tongue as the force of your orgasm pushed his cock out of you. You shuddered as you gushed on his dick, wrapping your arms around his neck when he forced his cock into your tight cunt again.

You were so overcome with emotions, so lost in Din’s scent mixing with your own, and his touch leaving bruises on your skin, that you didn’t notice the faint sounds of footsteps coming up the ramp and halting in the middle of the ship right in front of the door. But Din noticed, managing to look up just in time to see Cobb standing in the middle of the ship and staring with wide eyes at the scene unfolding in front of him.

Something completely otherworldly took over the Mandalorian and he quickly sat up, expertly moving the two of you around until he was kneeling on the covers with you straddling his thighs. He smiled against your shoulder, allowing your hair to hide his face as he grabbed both of your hips and fucked up into you.

He could vaguely see the Marshal and was surprised that he hadn't dropped the bottle of drink in his hand just yet. You wailed into the night air, arms keeping you stead in Din’s arms as he forced you on his pulsating dick over and over again.

“Tell me...tell me Cyare, tell me how much you love it when I fuck you. How much you need my cock like the filthy little cockslut you are. Go on sweet girl, grind that little clit on me. Fucking tell me ner Ad’ika.” Din smacked your ass twice, chuckling when your moans grew more lewd with every touch he laid on you.

“I- I- ahhh love your cock...oh maker, no one fucks me like you. N-no one makes me c-cum like you. Fuck me harder D- ahhh,” Din bit down on your shoulder to prevent you from saying his name, looking through the mess of your hair and watching as his audience remained incapable of moving.

“I own this pretty little pussy. Pffassk- ride me harder Mesh’la. You’re such a good girl, could feel your cunt drenching my thighs, the smell of you is driving me mad. Fuck- keep that pretty mouth open to me when I’m fucking you, let me hear you scream for me.”

“Please- please...fuck me harder, ruin my pussy. Gods- I..I’m so close please. Tell me you own me, tell me I’m you’re sweet girl. Please- I want to be good for you, want you to cum inside me Din...cum inside me. I need it, need you to fuck me like you own me and mark me, make me yours Mando. Cum in me, please-”

“Ah fuck you’re my sweet little girl aren’t you? Wanting me to fuck a load in you, cum in you all night long and keep my seed in that tight cunt? That’s it sweetheart, I’m so fucking hard for you. Could feel you clenching around me...be a good girl and cum again ner kar'ta. Fuck, yes yes you feel so good wrapped around my cock Cyare you’re going to make me cum. Spill my seed in that tight, wet pussy, fill you up till you can taste it in your throat. Shit, and- and I’m going to keep fucking you sweet girl, till my cum is sliding down your thighs. My little fucktoy- come on, come on love, cum for me. Cum on me, drench me again. Mix your juices with me.” Din watched as Cobb finally had the mind to leave and he almost laughed at how the man almost tripped on his own foot as he sprinted out of the ship. He pushed you on your back and spread your thighs open, resting his weight on the arms around your head as he thrust in a few more times before he felt you clench around him. Leaning down, Din took a pert nipple in his mouth and sucked on it, growling into your skin as he came deep in your pussy, painting your walls with long strings of his seed until he couldn’t breathe. He’d never cum this hard before and was sure to tell you when you had the state of mind to pay him any semblance of attention.

Din continued to lazily push into you, your words from earlier replaying in his mind as he felt you quiver around his softening cock. You were still coming down from your high and twitched occasionally when you felt him throb inside you. There was a pleasant kind of warmth washing over you and you sighed happily when you realized he was still bucking against you to push his cum in your belly.

“D-din...you’re filling me up so good. Feel so full ah- gah.” He laughed when your body shook, wrapping his arms around you and flipping you around until you were laying on his chest. You kissed his jaw and his neck, moaning in unison when you felt his dick rub against that sweet spot inside you.

“That’s because I’ve never cum this hard sweet girl. You’ve milked me dry Cyare. Could feel you sucking my seed out of me.” He was amazed at your obvious embarrassment, wanting to tease you about it but choosing to wait for later instead.

Din rubbed at your back, kissing your forehead as he whispered sweet things in your ears and smiling when you nipped at his neck some more.

“Promise me you’ll never leave.” Din’s quiet voice broke the silence and you pushed up to look into his eyes as you responded. “I’m not going anywhere, even if you tell me to go. I’ll stay here, always. I promise.” You kissed him gently and felt his pulse beneath your fingers calm at your words.

Not much time has passed before Din had you on your knees in front of him, fucking your mouth and shoving you down on his cock until you gagged and his seed slipped from the corner of your mouth, mixing with your spit as it fell down your breasts. You lost count of how many times he brought you pleasure, and you made a mental note to ask him how he managed to fuck you all night long. You weren’t sure it was possible for a man to cum this many times over the course of one night but you had a feeling Din was not like anyone else. A man who has been touch starved for almost three decades must have had a lot of pent-up aggression that he needed to release. And you would gladly help him in any shape or form through that.

And when he wasn’t pumping your cunt full of his cum, he was nuzzling into your neck and laying kisses across your arms, making sure he caressed every inch of your skin. You shouldn’t have been surprised that Din loved to snuggle with you but you did find it hilarious that such a big and scary Mandalorian whimpered when you licked down his neck as you nestled into his arms. You wouldn’t tell him just yet but besides his rough grasps and his filthy words, you loved to taste the saltiness of his skin and from the looks of it, the feelings were mutual because at some point in the night, he’d told you of all the times he had to lock himself up in the refresher and try his hardest to not think of your sweaty limbs entangling with his own as he kissed you.

By the time the two of you made it outside the following day, the twin suns had already been in the middle of the sky, scorching rays of heat on everyone across Mos Pelgo. You tried your hardest not to walk too funny, mostly because it made Din apologize every now and then, but it was difficult when you could still feel traces of his touch on you. You told him you needed him to stop making it obvious but realized he was apologizing out of regret not out of humor. It took you all of the afternoon to convince him that you were feeling more than okay and that you’d asked him for this. And when he didn’t seem to stop, you teased him and told him that you knew he secretly loved watching you wobble from side to side.

This all, however, peaked when you walked into the cantina and tried to play Sabbac with Cobb Vanth and the others. You could tell that the Marshal was avoiding all conversation with you, going out of his way to pretend you weren’t even sitting on the table, let alone the room. You hoped that Mando hadn’t spoken with him or anything and decided to call it quits earlier in the night. When you did make it back to the ship and saw Din cleaning his weapons, you made sure the ship was secure before moving to sit on the bed across from him.

“Did you talk to Cobb today?” You gauged his reaction, already sensing that something was wrong when you saw him nervously clench his jaw before rubbing furiously at the beskar weapon.

“No, why do you ask?” Din wished he hadn’t already taken off his helmet because as soon as he responded, you knew he wasn’t telling you the whole truth.

“Din?”

He looked up at you and cleared his throat before speaking.

“He- he saw us...last night. I- I must have forgotten to raise the ramp and-” Din took a deep breath when you shot up from the cot and began to pace back and forth.

“HE WHAT?”

“We were...I couldn’t- there wasn’t a chance I could…you felt too good around me Ad’ika I- I couldn’t stop. Not when you were clenching around me so tightly. Now when you were finally in my arms. I-” He stood up and walked towards you, taking your hands into his and kissing both of your wrists. You flushed at his words and looked up at him, only to find him blushing under your gaze.

“You did it on purpose didn't you? You wanted him to see...to watch as you- as we...as I said-” Din didn’t let you finish the sentence, leaning down and molding his lips with yours as he walked you back to his bed. He pushed you down on the covers still holding your scents, his hold hardening the more you moaned against him. Before he could strip you of your clothes, you pushed him off and stuck out your finger in warning.

“Oh no you don’t. Go raise the ramp.”

“You’re giving me orders now Mesh’la?” Din raised an eyebrow at you as he got off of you and walked around the bed, halting at the doorstep to look back at you.

“Never…”

Translations:

Ad'ika - Little one

Mesh'la - Beautiful

Cyar'ika - Darling/Sweetheart

Cyare - Beloved

Ner - my/mine

Pal'vut at kar'taylir darasuum - mine to love

Ni copad gar an te ca'nara - I want you all the time.

Ni vercopa be gar anay ca - I dream of you every night.

Ner kar'ta - my heart

#The Mandalorian fanfiction #The Mandalorian x Reader #The Mandalorian smut #mando x reader #Mando smut #Mando fanfiction #Din Djarin x Reader #Din Djarin smut #Din Djarin fanfiction #The Mandalorian #Din Djarin #Pedro Pascal #star wars #star wars fanfiction #baby yoda #grogu

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starlightxsvt · 4 years ago

Text

Home | k.mg

pairing ➳ businessman!mingyu x female!reader

genre ➳ strangers to lovers, romance, slice of life, angst, fluff, gets spicy at the end

word count ➳ 5.6k (apx)

warnings ➳ cursing, reader is really indecisive, heavy makeout, implications of sexual activity.

synopsis ➳ an attractive stranger visits your cabin for a week with whom you quickly bond, developing some strong feelings in the process; leaving you to wonder if he's worth leaving everything behind.

A/N: henlooo~ I finally posted! This has been sitting in my drafts for a while but I didn't really feel like writing for a while, hence the delay. I hope y'all enjoy this piece and please don't forget to leave some feedback! It really motivates me :)

A cool gust of wind blew by as you finished typing your last column, leaving a soothing feeling behind as you exhaled loudly. It was hard to finish this piece of writing for some reason, maybe because you lacked inspiration or maybe because your life had been monotonous for a while or simply, a mix of both. Closing your laptop you stretch your hands and legs, feeling somewhat productive. Humming a tune, you looked out the window to see a Lamborghini come to a halt at the entrance.

It piqued your interest because it's not often that people riding Lamborghini come in this cabin so genuinely you're interested in the visitor. You shifted in your chair, waiting for the man to come upstairs to the reception and sure enough a tall- really tall man dressed in a neatly pressed suit appears into your view, briskly walking towards the reception where Chan stood to greet him. You could not get a good look at his face as he moved around quickly, grabbing his small carry on and heading towards his cabin after the formalities.

You watched his tall frame walking away as you got up from your seat and moved towards Chan.

"Who is he?"

"Kim Mingyu," Chan explained, resting his arms on the reception table." A millionaire, owns a lot of companies. No wonder he looked familiar."

"Oh, really? How long is he staying?"

"He has booked for five days. Said he might extend his stay."

"I see."

"Why are you so curious though?" Chan raised a brow at you, tilting his head to a side.

"Nothing." You shrugged. "He just has different vibes than the other people that come here you know?"

Chan hummed in agreement.

There was never much visitors during the rainy season which was both a blessing and a curse. Blessing because that meant the cabin was less hectic and curse because sometimes you are bound to get a bit too bored. You were helping yourself with a cup of tea to somewhat feel re-energised when your newest and the only guest for the week appeared from his cabin, padding through the corridor and stepping into the common kitchen area. You were taken aback for a moment before you composed yourself and smiled at your guest, "Good morning, Mr. Kim. May I help you with anything?"

"Mingyu, please," the tall male replied while scanning the kitchen area. "You're the owner right? What's the food arrangement here?"

"Well, our guests generally cook for themselves or order takeout. When there are many guests I sometimes do the cooking."

Nodding, he hummed before putting in a capsule in the cappuccino machine. You took a seat by the window, tea in your hand as you watched the male move around like he knew this place. Dressed in his pajamas and judging by the fluffy mess that his hair was you assumed he had a good night's sleep.

"I hope you had a pleasant night, Mr- Mingyu." You said to your guest who had whipped out a pan from the cupboard and was making omelette. "Yes, surprisingly so. Normally I have trouble falling asleep but I slept like a baby last night," he casually conversed as he prepared his breakfast.

You smiled, "Well, I'm glad to know that. If you need anything let my staffs or me know."

"Sure. Oh- I didn't get your name though." Mingyu turned to meet your eyes.

"___," you smiled.

"___, okay."

"This is gonna be a rainy week," Hoshi said from behind you as he stood holding a tub of fresh soil for the plants in the backyard of the cabin. You sat on your knees, eyeing the plants which needed their soil changed.

"Yeah? Well, good thing there isn't much guests now."

"I think there should be, I mean it's so pretty here during the rain too. People need to look at it themselves." Hoshi complained.

"Well, most people don't like going out in the rain. Pass me the soil, Hoshi. Let's get this finished before the shower starts."

Hoshi handed you the tub of soil as the sky above started growling, full of thick black clouds. It was gonna start raining soon.

Hoshi spoke, "Oh, Mr.Kim, Mingyu you know, asked me about the beach by the marketplace. Apparently he wants to visit so he asked me if I was free to show him around."

"And let me guess, you aren't?" You rolled your eyes.

Soonyoung pouted, "No! Well I would have given him a tour today if the weather wasn't so bad. And my friends are coming tomorrow, so I'll be busy then."

"Wait- you're friends are coming?" You turned, glaring at the boy who smiles sheepishly, "Oh! Um- I didn't tell you? Well they're only staying for a couple of days and it's not like they're staying for free."

"Well, make sure they clean after themselves okay? If I see them trashing all over the place like last time, I'm kicking you out with them." You gave him a pointed look.

"Okay okay," Hoshi rolled his eyes, puffing his cheeks. "Just- take the CEO out on a tour tomorrow for me okay? I haven't seen my friends in a long time."

"Alright, I will...if the weather is good which probably won't be." You sighed, gently removing the old soil.

Hoshi mused about Mingyu, "Bummer for him, he came in a wrong time. It's weird, no? We don't have such guests like him."

"Yeah," you hummed, focused on handling your roses.

Hoshi's friend, Seokmin and Seungkwan appeared early in the morning next day as you watched Hoshi vibrate from happiness when he hugged them. You smiled to yourself, laughing at at the antics of your staff as you saw him guide his friends into their cabin. The day was once again filled with dark clouds and raining which occurred every other hour. You and Chan cleaned up and completed some chores as the noon fell.

"Should I cook something up for them?" You wondered as Chan finished cleaning the common space of the first cabin.

"Nah, Seokmin hyung is cooking for them. He's a pretty good cook actually."

"Really? That's nice." You said pulling up a chair to sit down. "Are you gonna join them? Hoshi has been with his friends since they came."

"Yeah, probably. You should join us too."

"No, I think I'm gonna take a nap. I feel so tired."

"Alright."

You watched as Chan climbed down the stairs and stepped towards the second cabin where everyone else was. You were about to head to your room when the CEO, Mingyu appeared in the kitchen.

"Oh, hello."

"Hi."

"I haven't seen you since morning," you said watching as Mingyu poured himself a glass of water.

"Yeah, I woke up early today, went for a jog."

"Ah, I see."

"Couldn't go far though, the weather sucks you know." He said leaning against the kitchen top.

"Yeah. But I heard that it should get better from tomorrow. I could show you around if you want to. Hoshi, my staff, is going to busy for a while so I can guide you around."

"Really? That would be cool." Mingyu smiled. There was a small stretch of silence as you both listened to the rainfall before he spoke, "Have you had lunch?"

"Uh-no."

"Would you like to join me?" He asked "This is the longest time I've been alone and it feels a bit weird," he murmured more to himself than you.

"I mean- I don't mind," you shrugged. "Though I should be the one doing it."

"It's okay. People say I am a good cook," Mingyu smiled, his eyes crinkling.

"Well, I suppose it wouldn't hurt to see."

It was weird how comfortable you felt watching Mingyu being clumsy and bump into things as he prepared your meal. It felt like you've been doing this forever- like you've known him forever and you thought to yourself what was suddenly wrong with you. He made small talk as he cooked and it felt easy talking with him- almost impossible to believe that he was stranger. He was friendly and easy to get along with, definitely not a cold and grumpy businessman like you imagined him to be.

Mingyu grinned as he set down the food in front of you- chicken soup, rice and cheese omelette. His eyes twinkled excitedly as he watched you take a bite, waiting for you to say something.

"What are you? A part time chef or something?" You tried not to moan as you chewed because it was that good. Mingyu laughed- a sweet, shy laugh that had his canines showing and his eyes forming crescents. "Thank you. I learned from my mom. I like cooking for myself when I get the time which is not often," he smiled- almost sadly.

"Well, you can cook for me all you want as long as you're here because this is amazing!" You grinned at him, cheeks puffed with food.

Mingyu chuckled softly as he dug in and you both started eating. It felt nice, to talk to someone new and spend time with them, someone other than Chan or Hoshi. It was a nice change- a change you probably needed for a while.

"So...What brings you here?" You asked as you finished your food, setting down the spoon and leaning back into the chair. Mingyu who was still eating, looked at you with a perplexed expression so you spoke, "I mean...we don't generally have guests like you. And it's not even a good time to visit...so I was wondering what brought you here?"

"Guests like me? What does that mean?"

"I mean...rich, okay?" You fumbled, feeling awkward. Maybe you shouldn't have asked. "Like...there are fancier places to visit, you know..."

Mingyu smiled at your words for a moment before he deadpanned, "I'm running away."

"Running away?" You gasped, almost jumping from your seat, "From who? The cops?"

"It would have been better but no, my family," he said, his voice as serious as ever.

"Oh...I see," you fell quiet. It definitely wasn't the answer you expected. You both remained silent for a while as he started out the window, lost in thoughts. "It must have been really bad if you're hiding out here." You spoke softly.

"It has always been," he mumbled. "I just couldn't take it anymore, you know? I desperately needed a break," he spoke more to himself than you. Instead of prodding further, you sat quietly, watching him and listening to his words. Seeing him now, he definitely looks troubled and you didn't exactly have the words to console him.

So you whispered, "Well, I hope it gets better."

Later that night, you find Hoshi and his friends and Chan preparing for a bonfire in the front yard of the cabin.

"Wow, you all are really having fun, no?" You said as you fisted your hands in your pockets from the chilly weather. The air was colder than other nights and everyone including you had put on some warm clothes.

"You wanna join us?" Seokmin asked as he stacked logs on top of each other.

"Nah, it's fine. You four carry on," you patted his back as you started walking back towards the cabin and saw Chan and Hoshi coming out with some boxes in their hands.

"Hey! There are marshmallows in the kitchen cabinet if you want.... nevermind," you finished as you saw beer cans and soju bottles in their hands.

"We're gonna get drunk baby!" Soonyoung yelled, grinning like a fool.

"Hyung, you look drunk already," Chan gave him a side look as they trudged towards the bonfire.

Laughing at their antics you climbed the stairs to the kitchen, preparing some hot chocolate for yourself. Holding the mug on one hand you knocked on the door to Mingyu's room, checking up on him since you haven't seen him since lunch.

The door opened revealing Mingyu in a baggy shirt and pajamas, his hair fluffy and messy.

"Hey," you chriped. "Wanted to check up on you. You wanna join the others in the bonfire?"

"Nah, I'm good. I've been watching them from the balcony." He smiled, his pointy canines showing.

"Oh, I see."

"You wanna come in? I've been getting lonely." He offered, moving away from the door to make space for you.

"Uh- I don't mind," you murmured, surprised that he asked you to come in. You tentatively stepped in and it was fair to say that you were surprised to see the room neat and pristine as most guests kept their room messy.

He ushered you into the balcony, which had a great view of your yard and the forest behind. You saw others laughing loudly as Soonyoung acted something out. Mingyu's voice pulled you out of your thoughts.

"You didn't join them?"

"Nah, they can get too loud sometimes," you chuckled, taking a seat on the bench. You eyed an empty mug lying by, guessing that Mingyu already had his fill of hot chocolate.

Mingyu took a seat beside you, stretching his legs and sighing as he mused, "The view is great."

You hummed your agreement. It was indeed. Not only did you have the full view of your yard and the forest, but you could see a vast horizon of the night sky, some stars twinkling through the clouds.

"It's even more beautiful during summer. You can see so many stars that it feels unreal." You told him.

"Then I will try to visit again during summer," he smiled and you were not sure if he was serious or joking. However you replied with a smile, "You're always welcome."

A silence falls among you two after that but it's not uncomfortable, as you both watched the night grow and Soonyoung and his friends got louder.

"Things got really hard for me, you know," Mingyu started speaking, his voice soft as he stared at the mesh of trees ahead. You were somewhat surprised at his words, but you didn't interrupt, opting for him to continue.

"Running a million dollar company was never easy but...it suddenly was unbearable. My parents always interfered in my work and how I run the company but I managed through all of that, really...until..." Mingyu heaved a long sigh, abruptly stopping.

"Until?" You tentatively asked, peeking at him.

"They want me to get married. With the daughter of their business partner. A marriage of convenience, really."

Oh.

You fell silent, watching him as the moonlight dimly lit the side of his face. There wasn't enough light to see his face completely, but enough to see the curve of his face, his sharp jawline and the sad, lost look in his eyes. Your heart suddenly ached for him. Silently you patted his shoulder, conjuring up some words to console him.

"That's ...awful, really. I'm sorry."

"I've never been so mad in my whole life. Can't they just leave me alone? They treat me like a puppet, like my only job is to live for them. I'm so done. " He said, his hands forming fists.

There's a beat of silence as you quietly patted his back and watched your friends get wasted by the bonfire before he chuckled softly, "I'm sorry for dumping all these on you. I just couldn't hold them in you know-"

"It's really fine, Mingyu. I don't mind. It would be nice if I could actually help you," you sighed, retracting your hand.

"Trust me, you are," he said and you caught a smile on his face.

"I suppose you don't have a significant other? Someone you could talk to freely?"

He shook his head. "That is why I came here. Needed to get my thoughts together, away from them. Not to mention I don't remember the last time I went on a vacation."

"And have you got your thoughts together?"

"I think so, yeah." He shrugged.

"What are you gonna do?" You asked tilting your head.

"Stand strong in my ground, I guess. There's no way I'm marrying their business partner, I'd rather die. And if all else fails, I'm staying here. I'm sure you have some type of job for me, right?"

You laughed at his words, "Maybe. But I'm not sure about your skills, Mr. Kim."

"Oh I'm a fast learner, Miss ___."

You both grinned at each other.

That night when you went back to your room, your thoughts were plagued by Mingyu and you could swear you saw him in your dreams too.

The next morning is brighter and shinier; the sky relatively clear other than some light clouds. After getting dressed and checking up on Hoshi and Chan who were still sleeping, you trudged through the cabin and towards Mingyu's room, before knocking on it. A fully dressed Mingyu appeared, clad in a white polo and jeans, his hair styled messily. He looked effortlessly attractive, making your heart skipp a few beats.

Damn it, what was wrong with you?

"Hi," you almost missed a breath, your face flushed with warmth.

"Oh, hey. I was about to come to you. I believe you were to show me around." Mingyu grinned, his pointy canines showing.

"And that is what I'm here for, Mr. Kim."

"Great! Let's get going. We'll take my car."

After showing Mingyu around for a couple of hours, you both ended up at the beach by the marketplace, sitting on the sand next to each other. The weather was nice; not too hot, not too cold as a light breeze flew by occasionally. Though you could see some black clouds gathering above, it wasn't to rain until evening if the forecast was correct.

"This place is so pretty," Mingyu mused, making you smile.

"I know right. The weather is great too."

You both watched the waves crash to the shore, occasionally wetting your feet as you both relaxed on the sand. There was a silence, a comfortable one as you finished eating the corndog you bought from the market earlier with some groceries. As you finished the last bite, Mingyu turned to face you and asked, "Tell me about yourself."

"What?" A squeak of surprise escaped from you.

"I shared a lot about myself last night. It's only fair I get to know about you too."

"Well..." You pondered. "There isn't much to tell. I've a pretty dull life, unlike you."

Mingyu chuckled, shaking his head, "Does the cabin belong to your parents? Is it like a family business type of thing?"

"No, not really," you smiled softly. "My parents are dead. The cabin belonged to my grandfather."

"Oh- I'm sorry."

"No it's okay. They passed away in an accident when I was a kid so I don't remember them much." You spoke, watching the sea, "My grandparents raised me. Growing up I've spent a lot of time in the cabin and when my grandfather retired he handed the job to me."

"Are they alive? Your grandparents?" He asked tentatively.

You shook your head, "Grandpa passed away a couple years ago and it's been a few months since grandma did too."

"I'm sorry, you must've been lonely," Mingyu offered, his voice soft.

You shrugged, "Yeah, like I said, nothing interesting going on in my life."

Mingyu hummed noncommittally and there was a few moments of silence before he spoke again, "Was managing the cabin something you have always wanted to do?"

You were quiet for a while as you thought over the question, "No...not really. I've just kept doing the job I was handed to. I haven't really thought about what I want to do."

"Well...I think you should hire a manager in your place and maybe...I don't come to the city and make friends, see what calls for you."

"Yeah, I've thought about it. But I don't know really." You murmured.

"Well, give it some thought. I could help you find a manager. In fact, I could help promote and upgrade your cabin if you'd let me. It'll be a good investment."

You laughed softly, not taking his words too seriously. He was just a guest. He was probably just being nice.

A gust of strong wind flew by, ruining your hair as it poked into your eyes and you laughed when your eyes landed on Mingyu.

"What?"

His hair was sticking in different directions because of the wind and you shook your head with a smile as you reached to pat the hairs back into place. It happened naturally, before you could stop yourself. For a moment your eyes meet as you quickly retract your hand, face heated.

Something was definitely wrong with you.

Mingyu's gaze stayed at you for a while; you could feel his intense eyes on you and you thought maybe he didn't like you touching him. Before your thoughts ran more rampant, he spoke.

"___?"

"Y-yes?"

"Do you...Do you have a home?"

"Home?" You were confused.

"Yes, home. Not like a real house but like a... person. Someone who makes you feel at ease, someone with whom you can be yourself without judgements, someone who keeps you cozy and safe and loved...like a home."

Somewhat taken aback by his words, you fell silent but their depth hit you and you found yourself thinking about it. Do you have a home?

No. No, you don't.

You shook your head, murmuring, "No."

Mingyu nodded taking his eyes off you.

"What about you?" You asked.

"Me neither."

You smiled, "Figures. Because if you had someone you wouldn't have run here but went to them."

Mingyu smiled, a sad smile gracing his lips. It was a somewhat bitter truth, he hadn't found his home no matter how much he looked for it. Maybe that's what he was doing wrong, looking desperately.

"Let's get going. It has started to rain," Your voice dragged him out of his thoughts as he felt small drops of water fall on his face. You reached your hand out to him and he took it, standing up. As you both jogged towards Mingyu's car, your hands remained connected, no one bothering to let go.

That night you had dinner with Mingyu again but this time it was you who did the cooking. After enjoying dinner over small talk, Mingyu like the gentleman he is did the dishes as you poured some wine for the two of you.

Sitting on the small table in common space by the window, you both watched the clear sky that had appeared after the shower. You sipped your wine, watching the vast expanse of stars that blinked in the dark sky.

"I think I've to go back tomorrow," Mingyu suddenly whispered, his tone so low you almost thought you misheard him. A bolt out the blue, you looked at him.

"Tomorrow?"

"Mmhmm," he fiddled with the hem of his cardigan as he stared at the table. "I've got so many calls and messages from work. My company won't run on its on, I can be gone for only so long." He sighed.

You didn't offer any words, too shocked to know that he'd be gone tomorrow. What is this attachment you've developed towards him? Why did the thought of someone, almost a stranger going back to where he came from, where he belonged hurt you so much? You didn't know what to label your feelings but realizing that you'd probably never see him again was tugging at your heartstrings.

Should you ask him for his number and stay connected with him? Is there even a point in that? You both live miles away from each other. Or should just take his advice and follow him to the city? Would that even be a good idea? Are you just reading all this wrong?

You were so invested in your thoughts that you didn't realize Mingyu was calling you until he shook your shoulder.

"You okay, ___?"

"Huh? Yeah...it's just, the news is really sudden. I didn't... expect you'd return so soon." You mumbled.

Mingyu sighed, his shoulder dropping a little bit. "Trust me, if I could I'd stay here forever. But...I can't keep running. I need to face my parents, the sooner the better."

At a loss of what to say, you just nodded. Reaching for your drink you took a big gulp, trying to calm your nerves. It's okay, you can do this. He's just another one of your guests.

You stood up, taking the empty glass in your hand, "Well, I better leave you alone now. I'm sure you've got packing to do."

You almost turned away; until a strong hand gripped your wrist and pulled you back, making you stumble towards Mingyu's body.

"Don't. Stay for a while. I don't want you to leave." His voice was soft yet deep and it immediately broke your resolve as you set the glass down and looked into his eyes.

He didn't let go of your wrist; instead only wrapped his other hand around your waist, pulling you closer, leaving just a few inches between your faces. You didn't tell him to move neither did you make any effort to get away from him- you didn't want to. It felt good, comforting as he held you and looked at you almost like you were his whole world. His eyes had so much emotion swirling in them and you were sure yours looked the same too.

"___?" His voice was breathy and it set your heart aflame.

"Y-yes?"

"Can I...kiss you?"

You inhaled sharply as his hold on you got tighter. You couldn't process a reply, overwhelmed with emotion. So you just nodded and Mingyu leaned in, pressing his lips to yours.

It was soft at first, his lips just resting against yours, as if he was testing the waters. When you didn't resist but only pulled him closer, he started devouring you, his tongue prodding in your wet cavern. Moans espaced from you as you kept pulling at his hair almost grinding on him, desperate for more. He was the same, kissing you with so much passion and vigour like you were the last female standing.

You somehow managed to tug off his cardigan between the kiss and when you pulled apart for air, Mingyu panted, "Can we take this to the bedroom?"

His deep raspy voice spread liquid heat throughout your body and you had to stop yourself from pouncing on him.

"Yes please," you breathed. Mingyu stood up straight, his tall and built body intimidating you in the best ways possible, "Oh baby, you don't have to beg. I'll give you anything you want."

Once again your breath was trapped as he picked you up, his hand under your ass to support you. When he dropped you on his bed and took off his tee you realized you were in for a long night. In the back of your mind, you also realized that this would make it even harder to let him go.

Next morning you were the first one to wake up as the sun barely seeped through the blinds. If you had to guess it wasn't any more than six am. Mingyu's hand rested on your waist as he remained snuggled against your back. It was so comforting that you almost forgot your reality and went back to sleep, until you remembered what had happened last night. Before you could start overthinking and possibly had a breakdown right there, you ever so carefully removed his hand from your body and scrawled out of the bed, grabbing your shirt and quickly throwing it on. Then you tiptoped out of his room despite the ache between your legs and rushed straight towards yours.

Slamming the door shut, your sat down, head in your hands. You've to now prepare for saying goodbye. Right, you just need to act casual and not let him know that you might have developed feelings for him in the past week.

His words came back to you.

"Do you have a home?"

You didn't have one until now but the realization that you may have found it brought tears to your eyes.

You spent the next hours wallowing in your self pity, curled up in your bed too afraid to get out and face Mingyu. Soonyoung dropped by once, knocking at your door and asking if you want breakfast, which you declined. Time slowly ticked away and you watched as the clock struck eleven. You couldn't stay inside forever. You needed to bid Mingyu a goodbye- that is if he hadn't left already. But you were sure he didn't; he wouldn't just leave without any words.

Sighing, you gathered every last bit of your courage and stepped out of your room. Immediately you saw Mingyu coming out from the opposite end of the corridor, the carry-on he brought with him in his hand.

"Hey, where have you been?" He asked, his steps getting quicker to come and stand in front of you.

"Oh- um, I took and shower and then dozed off, sorry," you lied easily, not meeting his eyes.

There was a beat of silence as you both stood in front of each other and when your eyes finally met his, a blush spread across his face like wildfire. The air was heavy with unsaid words and you coughed, trying to get rid of the terrible awkwardness.

"So, you're leaving now?"

What a nice question.

Mingyu seemed to be lost in thoughts as he snapped back to reality and scratched the back of his head, "Oh yeah, right. It'll be a couple hours drive so the earlier I leave the better."

Nodding you motioned your hand towards the exit, "I'll see you out."

Mingyu seemed to have something to say but he pressed his lips in a thin line and started to climb down the stairs, you behind him. Soonyoung, who was standing at the entrance gave you a conspirational wiggle of his brows but said nothing as he watched you follow Mingyu out.

You observed as Mingyu loaded his bag in the trunk, peeking glances at you every other second. When he finished, you spoke, "Well...good luck. I hope you can overcome your problems."

"Thanks. It won't be easy and my dad will probably take away my shares of the company but...I'm done living like this."

You nodded, smiling softly as you crossed your arms against your chest. It suddenly felt cold.

You both gazed at each other, saying nothing even though you've so much to say, as if the silence would carry your unsaid words to him. You were torn- wanting to talk about last night but chickening out knowing it was probably just a fling, a one night stand for him.

"___..." Mingyu spoke but the words died on his tongue. Not trusting yourself to speak, you swallwed the ball of emotions and looked at him with a curious tilt of head.

"...I hope you find what you really want to do. And I hope you find your home too," he said, his words so soft and gentle. For some reason you had a feeling that those were not the words he wanted to say yet you forced a smile and nodded, "You too, Mingyu."

His eyes swirled with so my emotions but you didn't know what he was thinking. He looked pained, just like you but you were too afraid to speak your feelings, scared that you misread him.

When you spoke no more, Mingyu sighed and backstopped slowly, "Well... goodbye, then."

You managed to choke out the words, "Goodbye."

Your emotions overwhelmed you, tears stinging your eyes as you watched him enter his car. Why did it hurt so much? Why did it feel like your heart was being ripped right out of your chest?

His engine roared to life and your stomach sunk. Was this really the right thing to do? Should you just let him go like this?

You made a split second decision that moment, just as his car moved forward a little.

"Mingyu!" You called after him, immediately making him stop the car. He came out, almost in a hurry, an expectant look on his face as you ran towards him. Then you made another split second decision as you wrapped your arms around his tall frame and held tight.

"I like you, Mingyu. I really like you." You mumbled in his chest.

He didn't say anything back but you felt his arms wrapping around you tightly and you stood there in each others embrace for a while. It felt like time has stopped, the warmth and safety of his arms comforting you and making you realize how you would have regretted if you had let him go.

Mingyu pulled back to take a look at your face, his hand cupping your cheeks, his warm but intense eyes on you, shining with love and adoration.

"Say something," you whispered, still unsure.

He chuckled, a light-hearted, carefree sound that made your heart swoon. "I like you too, if it wasn't obvious after last night."

Elated, you pulled his face down and kissed his lips as you felt him grin and wrap his arms around you once again.

"I want to go with you...to the city," you murmured into his chest as he rested his chin on the top of your head.

You couldn't see it but you felt him smirk, "Good. Because I think I found my home."

Your heart couldn't become fuller as you grinned like a happy child.

"Me too."

A/N 2: If you enjoyed reading don't forget to like and reblog and let me know your thoughts!

#seventeen #seventeen fic #seventeen imagines #seventeen scenarios #seventeen fanfic #seventeen smut #seventeen au #seventeen fluff #seventeen angst #svt imagines #svt fluff #svt scenarios #svt fic #svt smut #kim mingyu #seventeen mingyu #svt mingyu #svt fake texts

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banqdanfnfic · 4 years ago

Text

which, as they kiss, consume | jjk

you just wanted to get a tattoo from your boyfriend

pairing: tattoo artist!jk x reader

genre: established relationships au, tattoo artist au, smut

word count: 4k

warnings: unprotected sex, biting, making out, grinding, licking, nipple play, jk has a lip ring, oral (f receiving), fingering, shy jk and oc, sexual tension, slight choking, slight aftercare

♫ : Streets by Doja Cat, Candy by Doja Cat

♡ Aesthetics: Playlist | Moodboard

He visibly chokes on his glass of beer as he almost snaps his neck to meet your gaze. He could say that you were awfully drunk and hence the sudden confession out of the blue, but behind your heavy lidded eyes, Jungkook could sense that you were serious.

“You what?”, he gulps abruptly, moving closer to your face, doe eyes pleading to repeat yourself.

“Yes Kook. I want that tattoo on my breasts. I’ve decided”.

It’s not that Jungkook didn’t have experience in his career with inking on different parts of a human body. He just had never given a tattoo to someone who is romantically associated with him and the thought of seeing you half naked made him chuck down the rest of his drink in one go.

The most physical he had ever gotten with you was a kiss shared occasionally since it’s only been over two weeks you had started dating. Okay maybe you made out once in his car but that’s it. It never got to the point of shedding clothes or anything intense.

“Are you sure?”

You giggle at the sudden hoarseness in his voice and nod positive. Ironic how his aura never matched his personality. His inked skin, athletic body proportions covered in black monochrome bad boy outfits gave out default energy that he is a local heartthrob with multiple chicks wrapped around his finger each night and a heavy demeanor to carry in his smirk.

You were one of those believers until Jungkook asked you out in the most hopeless romantic way possible after constantly visiting the café you work in, a few shops besides his parlor. He was a gentleman with respectful boundaries, warm hands to hold yours and sweet sensual kisses though you are pretty sure he probably has a good game.

For any outsider it looked like those cliché bad boy and shy girl love stories, but for real both of you were a good percentage of introverts.

Jungkook runs his tongue around his lip ring while he is stressfully ruffling his dark locks into a mess. He is trying to explain his reasons to postpone your decision considering how shy he got at this point. But then that’s exactly why you were requesting him with soft eyes, it would be so uncomfortable to be shirtless in front of anybody else. Or maybe it’s your way of saying the relationship is open for higher levels of physical affection.

After debating around in vain, he finally hums and clears one of his slots for his beloved client.

Friday approaches way quicker than you assumed and now your heart is beating in your throat. Right after you are done cleaning the tables, you have to make it to Jungkook’s parlor for your appointment.

Running on three hours of sleep, black under eyes even after a decent amount of makeup, you groan as you check yourself out in the mirror. You opted for a simple shirt and skirt (also known as the outfit you bought for occasions with Jungkook), light beach waves resting on your shoulders. Hoping that a few cups of coffee will save you, you stride across the street to stop before the infamous parlor he worked in. Hopefully the full body shave and chocolate body butter has kept its excellence on your skin below the clothing.

The door chimes as it opens with a dragged creak on the musky wooden flooring. It felt like an otherworld where air smelled like men’s perfume and faint tint of cigarettes. In other words, intoxicating.

You ask the first person you meet at the reception, one of Jungkook’s companions at the shop and he assists you to his cabin located at a comfortably remote location.

His space is hidden with a simple black curtain. You are met with Jungkook’s back facing you, working determinately on a client’s arm and cares to spare a glance only when the guy with you is informing him about your presence.

“This will be over in a few”, he grins to your face and goes back to focusing his coil on the skin of a woman in her late twenties laying down his chair. The vibration from his inking machine fills in the silence and you excuse yourself to sit on a small black couch beside them.

This was the first time watching him at work and now you can understand why people rumored so much about his attitude because damn it is intimidating.

Brows knit together and inked muscles flex as he drags the needles around for finishing touches. Meanwhile you can pretty much smell the drool from the woman who is shamelessly checking out your boyfriend. Though you are pretty sure Jungkook gets such glances more than he can count every day, you can’t help but feel jealous. Partly because of the childish possessiveness and partly because you want to be the reason behind his dark eyes and intricate concentration, in profession or not.

To stop from mentally throwing daggers on the client’s way, you grab a random fashion magazine from the side table and flip through pages, though other four senses are inclined on your man. With a close attention to his low sigh you conclude that he is done.

The customer with now a fresh tattoo on her arm is discussing random useless topics to get him to talk, a very vain job realizing how Jungkook doesn’t bat a friendly lash at anybody, especially to those who hit on him. To be honest a large part of the ink business was linked with the obsession to attractive people who worked here, even if it meant trading an area of your skin. You grip the edges of the magazine a bit hard, not able to contain the sanity particularly at the high pitch voice she mumbles in before finally leaving his cabin.

A little excited and a lot nervous, you stand up as Jungkook bids goodbye to the third person.

He is quick to notice your discomfort, though not sure if it was the woman or the thought of finally getting the tattoo, he knew you were nervous and surviving in several cups of espresso by the dark circles slowly showing through the faded layers of your concealer. But nothing pulls down the opinion he has about you, beautiful and simple, no dramatics attached.

“Hey are you okay?”

You nod as soon as you sit down on the black tattoo chair, shifting a little to find a comfortable position. He is taking out a box full of equipment and fine needles, already making you break a sweat at the side of your forehead.

But more than that, it’s the way he is sharp and professional that catches your attention more.

You have never seen Jungkook this serious before. The choice of his vetiver perfume digging through your nostrils was driving you insane. If he doesn’t smile soon, you are going to melt into a puddle at his gaze.

“Are you nervous?”, he smirks this time, a newfound reason for your worsening gut health.

It’s mostly going in cycles at this point. Every bit of his skilled motion causes a vigorous hormonal reaction which initiates his next set of effortless teasing.

“I’m a little nervous”, you say, fiddling with your freshly painted nude nails.

“Me too”

It’s something you least expect to come out of his mouth observing how confident he looks right now. He basically has you cornered with his gaze. But whenever he had been truthful about his emotions it felt like a hug.

“I can take off my shirt too, so that we are even. Is that okay?”

He said it so softly like he is handling a child and the duality of the situation had your mind fogged and limbs frozen for a few minutes.

“Yeah it’s okay” It’s far beyond than okay. It’s great actually.

Jeon Jungkook is ripped, a Greek God sculptured masterpiece covered in self designed artwork you are more than happy to wake up to every morning. He hears you gulp at the feast before your eyes while he discards his black t-shirt to a nearby chair.

Now you don’t know if this whole thing is supposed to warm your heart or make you play several erotic fantasies like a movie before your eyes.

Both of you share a small smile while his long fingers are tugging at the hem of your shirt and pulling it up over your head.

He almost wishes you don’t opt to wear a bra but he is met with lacy black, a-bit-over your-usual-budget fabric hugging the roundness of your breasts.

It seemed like you were way too competitive about today. Anything less than complete awe from Jungkook for you was straight disappointment, you don't want anything less.

Well it seems like it did from how blown his pupils were at this point. He peels his gaze off your chest with a sharp gulp to look at your eyes suddenly devoid of any fear and staring back at him with all ease. He is filled with an exapnse of warmth and he isn't sure why does spending just a little amount of time with you had such a grip on him. He can’t wait to propose the idea of getting a couple tattoo together soon and as far as you know how Jungkook is, he is very serious with his body art so apparently he does trust you a lot already.

“Where exactly are you trying to get it?”, his voice is a lot deeper suddenly as he waits for your fingers to guide to his canvas.

You softly trace the spot at the upper circumference of your right boob, “Here”.

You suck a breath through your nose as his own fingers are mimicking your gesture, lightly pulling down the lace to inspect the fitting of the design at hand.

These violent delights have violent ends

And in their triumph die, like fire and powder

Jungkook traces each word on your burning skin, now leaning dangerously close which was questioning your control to put your palms flat on his pecs. He doesn’t notice that though, his mind is busy creating his own fantasies about the women under him.

After two minutes and twenty four second long of inspection and mutual thirst, Jungkook is selecting a bunch of needles to set into the rotary machine. Five fine sharp like a painter's brush moves in and out at a set regularity as Jungkook tests it out.

The next of his actions had you flushed into a pool of crimson. He gently lifts up your resting torso with one hand while the other is unclasping the hook of your bra, making you half naked for the sake of the tattoo.

"I'm going to start", he says shyly.

You still have time to save yourself from the growing phobia for the object, but another unlogical part of your brain says it's a piece of cake considering you have a whole distracting full course meal in front of you.

It stings at first. Well, okay it hurts like hell but your face is devoid of any indication, except your right hand is gripping on the rim of the chair for dear life.

Jungkook on the other hand had never felt this much diversion of mind during his work. He knows that you are probably hurting very badly, especially for a first timer. He is biting into his lip ring, trying to get this over with for the well-being of your pain and his hormones.

After he had scribed one word into your dermis, you are no longer able to contain the ache so you give out a small squeak out of your glossed lips and the vibration of the machine at his hands stops as he looks at you.

"You want me to stop? ", he is relaxing his face as he cups yours with one hand. You don't want to answer that question, but the drumroll of the current situation is making your heart flutter and everything about the little burn on your chest is forgotten.

"No. It does hurt but I'll be fine I guess", you whisper. His breath is mixing with yours slowly as he is leaning more towards your face. If it isn't for a kiss then you are likely to be disappointed.

"It'll be over before you know it. I'll make it quick", and then he kisses you, a small act to get off the pressure of sexual tension between your bare upper bodies.

Before you think of any tongue in the act, he is breaking off the contact and returns to his position on your chest. He misses the pout that forms on your mouth but right now both of your heads are in cloud nine.

The pain starts again, only this time you are busy reliving how his lips felt in yours; soft, firm and controlled.

You gasp when you feel one of his hands cupping your right breast to further his design but it's lowkey an act empowered by lust which is straining behind the so called professional eyes.

You just sit there flustered out of your mind and then Jungkook is suddenly squeezing, full palm hiding your breasts like it's a protected treasure, but he isn't showing the slightest facial expression other than determined eyes and his lower lip caught between his teeth.

Fuck you can't take it anymore. Jungkook can feel your nipples harden against his hand and his brain isn't helping much to concentrate on the design. But by the grace of some positive karma left on his side, he makes it through the long text and when he is letting go of your chest and standing tall, your skin is popping out with redness on the places the text lays embedded.

He fishes out a mirror for you to look.

"It looks beautiful thank you Jungkook", you smile.

"Can I give you one more tattoo on your left one?", he asks while you are contemplating whether going through the pain is worth it, not to mention you really want to get back at a private space with Jungkook as soon as possible.

"It won't hurt I promise", and then he is kissing you a lot filthier than before; all tongue and teeth, while his hands are grazing on the skin of your waist, pressing a little firmer than before.

The coldness of his lip ring rivaled around your mouth, and you try sucking on it to which Jungkook responds with a growl and pushes his body adamantly against yours.

Skin to skin, you are lost in euphoria of everything happening and finally, you roam your eager hands around his body, to his pecs and the definition of abs.

As your fingers scraped against his scalp, Jungkook is biting eagerly down your jawline to your collarbone and continues his ministrations at a particular spot which is bringing out melodic moan variation from you.

He is going down your skin, licking on your left boob before he starts planting violet tattoos as he had promised. As if it couldn't get better, he is massaging the right breast, in a way to soothe pain.

He loses it when you stutter his name, but he is just a fucking tease when it comes to making love and doing anything in a public space is the last thing he wants to do. There isn't much room for all that he wants right now.

"Why did you choose this particular tattoo Y/n?", he rasps while he is planting small pecks on his artwork, and you reply when he is finally eye level with you

"I just felt like it's a good one", your breaths are uneven and mostly caught in your neck. He pecks your lips before speaking, "Those are lines from Romeo and Juliet".

He takes your hands to trace over a line of text among the many designs on his chest.

which, as they kiss, consume

"We pretty much have a couple tattoo now Y/n", his breath is matched with your pace and you are not very sure how to respond to this new knowledge.

"That's… hot"

You break into giggles along with him, he just can't stop dragging his lips around your skin, but he isn't able to word his feelings right now either.

"I have some aftercare healing ointment for the tattoo at my place, wanna come over?" Now that may be a little lame of an excuse to get his little friend out of his pants but you are too unfazed to analyse any of that.

His hands find place on your ass under the skirt as soon as the door to his apartment closes, and before you know it, you are in his bedroom, sitting on the soft mattress and tongue lost devouring each other.

While eagerly getting rid of every article of clothing, Jungkook notices that you don't have your bra on beneath the shirt, so it's probably back at the parlour, but none of you have the slightest care for it, might as well make an excuse with it later to fuck you in his cabin.

He is pushing you farther towards the headboard, him on top, grinding sensenslesy while your lips mould with his. Though he has his whole body pressed against you, you can't seem to feel his weight at the slightest, every one of his actions were just balanced and perfect.

As Jungkook goes down on you, his smile is evident against your skin, finally able to find out how every one of those scenarios in his head will come to look like. He lets out a satisfied hum being finally able to suck on your tits, your fingers finding place on his hair, twisting it out of stimulation.

His pelvis is flushed harshly against yours, grinding and rubbing against your pussy for as long as he is rejoicing the feeling of moving his tongue around both the nipples.

He stops rubbing after some point and you whimper at the loss but his fingers are soon to meet your core as a quick apology. All your later moans are muffled on his mouth once again.

Feeling the controlled movements of his fingers on your clit, you dig your nails down on his toned shoulders. It's becoming impossible to reciprocate his lewd movements of tongue on your lips at this point as the excitement between your thighs is growing every passing second.

Your mouth remains slightly parted as he removes his face to watch you squirm underneath, lips swollen, deep red and glossy from all the saliva.

He pecks at the shell of your ear before going down past your navel.

You haven't had much heads in the twenty years of your life, most of the guys being completely against the idea which made you feel insecure to bring up the topic in bed, but Jungkook does it like his life depends on it.

He growls at the sight of you dripping into his sheets and he seems to enjoy the idea of being the influence behind it. But none is going through your head at the moment, not the metal on his lips grazing against your folds, or the fact that Jungkook is grinning each time you cry his name, it feels unreal to feel something like this.

His mouth is wrapping against your entrance and he is balancing your lower body on his palms to help him reach the right depths inside you. While all you can muster up is the strength to grope the bedsheets in your fist and close your eyes at the pleasure.

Jungkook brings his head higher to give some attention to the throbbing clit, catching it between his teeth and triggering the bundle of nerves just the perfect dose to have your hips jolting up to his face.

He can't take it himself when you are now whining and chasing for your release, so he is slightly humping against the bed to get some friction.

He licks a slow stripe up till your abdomen and slowly raises to your face, already fucked out and dishevelled to keep up with his dominant orbs.

He swears he had never felt so much warmth and care for sex with any of his previous partners, in relationship or not, all he could think is how good can he treat the pleading eyes underneath him.

"Is there something you like that you want me to do?", he says, fingers grazing once again to your crotch to not deny you from his contact. Only this time he is exploring the tightness of your pretty cunt with two skillful fingers.

Is there? You are not sure. Or in other words you are too caught up at the sense of him fingering you. It's not like you had enough experience or people who cared enough to ask that question. It astounds you that never in this entire foreplay he asked for any favor for himself.

"I'm not sure…", you whisper and then maybe you have something on your mind " um I guess I would like to be choked" Okay this felt embarrassing.

He smiles before sliding his free hand from your lips to your neck, and applies slight force, careful to not hurt you in the slightest bit.

"Is that fine?"

"Yeah", you muffle through the decreasing course of air.

He pulls up your face by the throat to attach lips once more. He just can't seem to get enough of kissing you senseless. Then, the tip of his long ignored cock is teasing the length of your pussy twice before it's stretching you out to the brim.

Bodies flushed and hot, his pace is deep and slow, making sure to kiss the cervix every time he is inside.

He watches as your eyes close shut and flutters around whenever he is grazing against your sweet spot. Both of your ears lost and eager for the moans looming out of each other, his more like what he sounds at the gym. Nice observation Y/n.

In this span of sexual energy you shared, you can make some obvious conclusions. Sex with him was surreal, both in terms of domination and the care he had. Rocking against him and keeping up with his hips was attainable— Compared to the intense eye contact he tries to hold, or the way he cups the side of your face and rubs the pad of his thumb on your cheeks while he kisses you during sinking back in, or the way his eyes glow at the beauty of your body open for him. It makes you feel special and it's difficult to respond to these gestures when you never felt this way before.

Jungkook could tell that from your face, but he hopes he lasts with you enough to help you know the worth you hold. You couldn't think too much about anything when you are busy squeezing around his length and coming twice in the first ten minutes.

By the third orgasm Jungkook is nearing his own and he pulls out to pump a few times before coming on your stomach.

"Was it okay?", his voice is all over the place, still balancing his body on his arms while you are amazed by his strength.

"It was amazing Jungkook", you smile. You have known a lot about Jungkook over the few dates you spent with him. That he likes literature, classics and philosophy, designs tattoos as a subconscious thing, that his game is A-1, and he likes working out almost three hours a day. Good for you. But it wasn't until now you know him to be gentle, like he is afraid to crush you under a feather touch. You don't know him as someone who is staring deep into your face after a good fuck, speaks nothing, smiles widely, and plants a peck on your forehead before getting off the bed.

He does the honors of cleaning both of your bodies with a towel, it's not like you have any strength left in you anyway. And then pulls out an ointment from the bedside table and plops next to your body.

"There. You need this to protect the tattoo", he takes off the nozzle and applies a required amount against the words on your chest and massages against them.

"Now go to sleep Juliet", he mocks, pulling up the sheets over you both "good night".

You snuggle against his hard chest, kissing his pecs before resting on it, "Good night Romeo".

thank you so much for reading!! please leave a feedback!!

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★ credits: @/rainbeary on spotify : songs that'll make you feel everything's in slow motion playlist

★ banner & boards: by me :)

a/n: this is my first time writing smut and i basically died of second hand embarrassment during the process. pardon for my untalented ass, i tried this wip continuously for a week and i seriously don't think it could get anything better though it's probably not much.

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