#or a diff needle size maybe?
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fictionkinfessions · 14 days ago
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Thought my feelings for Error were very Normal but turns out I kin him 🙃 and this has now given me two canons with Errorberry??
As Yanberry I think he was my beloved? I wasn't super violent but I was definitely very protective of him. We both had BPD swag honestly :). I was also really protective of Paps but not in a romantic/incestuous way, I was just very much a "you aren't nearly good enough for my brother so I'm gonna make your life hell until you leave him alone" kinda person. Skeleton. Whatever. But yeah I think I just kinda followed Error around and tried to help with the whole destroying timelines thing? I'm pretty sure I fucking *hated* Ink too since he fought Error? Ummm sorry Ink, you're actually super cool and I really like you in this life, I was just not entirely stable lol
As Error I think I just slowly developed feelings for Blue? He was everything I wasn't, at least outwardly. As far as I could tell he was optimistic, peppy, observant, a good strategist, all kinds of things! Eventually I realized he apparently also carried the depression that seems to follow every version of Sans, but still! I really saw him as a "better" version of me. Probably put too much pressure on him because of that, sorryyyyy. Oh, btw! Hey Blue? I don't think I ever got the hang of knitting. Thanks for trying to teach me though! Apparently that has carried to this life because I'm complete ass at knitting, every time I try I manage to drop every stitch immediately somehow??? Maybe I'll get better though, for you :)
~ Anyanon (#🥀💊)
w
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brosser-les-dents · 5 months ago
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hi.
ive never done this before but um im not very good at taking care of myself and ive been trying to fix that, especially when it comes to getting myself to start a routine of brushing my teeth.
its really hard because im pretty sure i have sensory issues. i just really hate the physical feeling of every step of the dental care process and how aware i become about how my mouth feels during it. its so bad that even the thought of trying to go brush my teeth immediately makes me uncomfortable and put off and hyperaware of my mouth which makes me feel bad about not brushing and starts a whole negative thoughts cycle.
i procrastinate doing it even though i know i need to do it and feel the consequences of not brushing everyday, all the time but i don't know how to even get myself into the bathroom with my dental stuff. i even bought specific paste and mouthwash that would help repair the damage and i got one of those tongue brushes (i have a fear of using floss) but i just can't seem to actually go and do the thing.
i was wondering if you had any advice or coping mechanisms or methods of distraction while brushing or something that can help maybe get my mind off what im feeling and doing so i can actually get through it without feeling terrible and just make the whole process a little less uncomfortable?
sorry for going off on a sort of tangent. i just really need help and i never really know how to go about asking or looking for it so i thought asking a stranger on the internet was probably an okay idea lol.
thank you for this blog and thank you for whatever advice you give in advance.
Sorry it's taken me a bit to reply, it's been a week and I had think about your ask for a bit as this isn't something I struggle with and I wanted to provide something helpful.
I know you mentioned you got special oral care things but didn't mention a toothbrush, so a diff one might help. There is a curaprox toothbrush and it's ultra soft and the bristles are tightly packed so you get a more overall brush feeling over your tooth instead of intense pokey from a regular toothbrush.
If you haven't heard about them, there are also these 360 or all around toothbrushes that will brush everything all at once so it's less sensory nightmare on one spot. They're shaped like the pic below, there are a bunch of diff ones. Mostly kid sizes but some adult sized.
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Another thing I can think of is to brush with your non dominant hand. Lol. You may end up spending so much time focused on making sure your non dominant hand is working properly to brush that you'll distract yourself from the feeling of brushing.
Another distraction tactic that I use is reading or watching something on my phone. Or wiggle your toes while brushing to distract from the sensory information you're getting in your mouth. (useful for when you're getting a needle or your blood drawn too)
Reading your ask, it also sounds like you may have developed an overall aversion to even being in the place of brushing, the bathroom. So take some baby steps at the kitchen sink, instead? Maybe just start by putting the brush into your mouth and do one very short cursory overall with your non dominant hand, and slowly work your way up until you're more used to it and then move back into brushing in the washroom. I'm hoping in your case, exposure will dull your senses and get you used to brushing, especially when you've made some changes to hopefully make the process bearable.
I really have nothing else. I hope at least a little of this was helpful. If anyone else has suggestions, please do share!
And remember to brush and floss everyone!
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solar-halos · 27 days ago
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knitting diaries: the improvement
first and foremost: the tutorial i followed. no one is doing it like ikoxun
i finished my second hand warmer, and i’m so happy to report that it turned out wayyy better than the first!! the ribbing on the bottom turned out pretty good imo, but i got really sloppy when i was doing the top ribbing. i think the problem has less to do with me not purling correctly and more to do w me not remembering if i knitted or purled into the last stitch which i know sounds ridiculous but i have the same problem when doing the lemon peel when i crochet, i have very bad goldfish memory lol. i said in the last post that the stitches were gappy bc of the needle size i used, but tbh the stitches for the heart one dont really pull at all so maybe it had more to do with my tension + the different size of the alternating pink and white rows since the yarn sizes were a bit diff?
i was thinking about redoing that hand warmer entirely, but then i figured that if i was doing that, i might as well redo the heart hand warmer too since it’s very off center if i don’t position it a certain way on my hand. i don’t know where this perfectionist attitude is rlly coming from lol esp since when i crochet i’ll make a million mistakes that really should be frogged but then am just like fuck it we ball. overall i would really recommend this project to beginners. i initially was gonna make leg warmers but since my legs are longer and wider than my hands i did get kinda unmotivated bc it felt like i was working forever only for the project to increase by like one millimeter lol
anyway, without further ado, here is the visual comparison. i tried to make it prettier than the last pic by putting it underneath an outfit i actually wore today. i was like ooh the pink on the tank top matches w the pink on the hand warmer and when i put them on i was like waitttt even the striped one looks cute when i wear it like this. shoutout to this shirt bc it really pushed me to finish the heart hand warmer hehe
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the shadows .. wtf. i gotta go to bed
edit: my hair got caught in the heart hand warmer 😭😭 hair reveal i guess
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dancedance-resolution · 5 months ago
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ugh i am having the most frustrating time with my first two crochet colorwork projects! tried a diff technique on the keith harring one and it does look better i think??? im still frustrated though, i feel like maybe there is no good way to do this in hdc. any form sc would be too stiff to wear as a garment and 2dc per pixel would make this way too big to embed in a crop top unless maybe i sized down my needle 1mm (which risks further splitting this cheap yarn….) UGH i am trying my best not to let perfect be the enemy of good but im increasingly thinking i might just have to do surface cross stitch i suppose! sigh it will waste a lot of yarn though esp on designs like snoopy where there’s a lot of color so we’ll see :/ tunisian crochet is also another option but intimidates me
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siriusmydeer · 4 years ago
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ron weasley smut alphabet
ron weasley x fem!reader
warnings: um this is all smut
a/n: i started at 4:45pm let’s see how long it takes. *update: it is now 10:20pm, my god*
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A = Aftercare (What they’re like after sex)
he takes a bath with you, with small kisses. then after when you’re done he gets snacks for the both of you. you lay your head on his chest as he praises you.
“up, up darling.” he coerces you from your laying position on his four poster bed. “m’gonna make you feel all nice and clean, yeah?”
the you most you could give him was a small nod, all fucked out from previous rounds, hours prior. your body covered in splotches of red and purple. your hair all messy and your whole body flushed with a sheer layer of sweat.
he dips both of your bodies into the bath, cleaning up your body. “you’re so good f’me, dove.”
he continued to praise you as he dryed you off with a towel and dressed you in a pair of his navy boxer shorts and his freshly clean cotton-quidditch jersey.
he layed you on the clean sheets that had changed themselves due to his manipulation of magic. he rummaged around his trunk trying to find your favourite snacks and one of your favourite muggle films to put on.
“last i went to hogsmeade ‘ve got your favourites.” he mumbled grabbing the snacks sprawling them out at the foot of the bed crawling over to your worn figure and immediately curling your body into his side.
his hand found the root of your hair massaging his way down your hair playing with your tresses. “i love you, my darling.”
“so so good, all f’me.” he praised.
B = Body part (Their favourite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)
UR MF BOOTY. ron is an ass man if u try and tell me differently bitch i’ll take u outside and tell u a lil SUM. yes ron appreciates your whole body, i mean molly raised him with a LIL respect but the thought of him just laying his head on your bum while your watching a movie and he’s just caressing it just makes his heart go 💞
“ronald, you know the point of watching a movie together is too actually view the movie together. not just smoosh your face into your girlfriends arse.” you said with faux-anger lacing your tone.
you were laying on your stomach in the room of requirement, the room giving you the ability to invision anything you like; a king sized bed with a plush white comforter and a massive tv fit to showcase any movie of your desire.
ron had some other priorities consisting of stripping off your sleep shorts and laying his cheek on your bum tracing the small stretch marks that glittered your sides. he thought you were utterly perfect and just appreciating and kissing your body was one immaculate way of showing it.
“m’simply just appreciating my beautiful girlfriend.” he teased, squeezing your bum. his eyebrows then furrowing. “and stop calling me ronald! merlin woman, you know how to drive a guy mad!”
C = Cum (Anything to do with cum basically… I’m a disgusting person)
whewwww the thiught of him cumming inside of your fertile velvet walls, the THOUGHT OF IT makes him hard. that man loves his creampies🙄
“m’gonna cum y/n.” he groaned, his calloused hands squeezing at your hips. your trembling fingers gripped at the sheets below you, arching your back more for him.
“s-sir, cum inside me, please.” you pleaded to the red head, moaning as he prodded at your cervix.
at your word, he let go; the ropes of his seed exploding inside of you, his vision starry and his body quivering. you whimpered at the feeling of him pull out of you; clenching around nothing and feeling desperate for his warmth again.
you felt his two dominant fingers push back inside of your clenching cunt, he spoke to you as he arched your back till your stomach hit the plush of the mattress.
“gotta keep you full of m’babies, understand?”
D = Dirty Secret (Pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)
oh my god breeding kink, THE THOUGHT OF YOU FERTILE AND POSSIBLY GETTING PREGNANT IS LITERALLY HIS BIGGEST KINK LIKE ITS SO HOT TO HiM.
your back was arched against the plaid comforter covering the mattress below you, you moaned into the air coarse of tension and arousal as you let your release wash over your body.
the feeling of calmness and euphoria settled into your nerves as your orgasam came to an end, your boyfriend close behind.
soon enough you felt your rons cum shoot inside of your empty-feeling cunt, just waiting for him to breed you. he waited a moment before shoving his fingers inside of your stuffed pussy.
you whined at the feeling of overstimulation as his fingers got comfortable inside your clenching pussy. “aw baby y’gonna cry? better take my fingers like a good girl or m’gonna spank you.” he obeyed you as your trembling arm made its way to his arm, feeling pins and needles mixed with slight pleasure on your clit.
“you’re my cumdump, yeah? gotta make sure all m’babies stay in there. none go to waste.”
E = Experience (How experienced are they? Do they know what they’re doing?)
i feel like you taught him everything. i mean who else has he dated either it was lavender or nobody. so i feel like the both of you learned together and yk he got good FAST 💯
you were seated atop of his slack-clad thighs, slightly squirminn and circling your lace covered cunt over his clothed cock. you moved your lips towards his jugular, his adam’s apple bobbing at the feeling of your smooth lips dancing over the column of his neck.
“y/n.” he stated in hesitation, encasing his pale hands between your cheeks and bringing your face towards his.
“m’not sure.” he mumbled, deaf to your ears.
“what?” your tone lingered in the air confused at what he murmured, you lovingly carded your fingers into his bright red hair pulling at the strands.
you wanted him to feel comfortable in whatever he had to confess, so you waited patiently until he cleared his throat; a light crimson coating his cheeks as he diverted his eyes while he spoke to you.
“m’not sure- ‘ve never- never... y’know?” he said embarassed, his hands dropping from your face and into his lap. he looked in the direction of his lap as-well until your forefinger snuck under his freckled chin diverting his gaze into yours.
“no need to be embarrassed, love. we can- we can learn together?” you proposed to him, both of you quite inexperienced when it came to sexual instances.
“you’re sure?” he wanted to double check with you, before continuing both of your acts.
“positive.”
F = Favourite Position (This goes without saying. Will probably include a visual)
definitely riding or doggy. riding because he just adores watching you bounce on his cock AND he can grab your tits AND he can see your face AND he can watch your squirm; it’s like an all in one. and doggy bc he can push your face into the mattress and just watch your back arch perfectly. when he’s feeling particularly rough, he can just grip the root of your hair and pull to his hearts desire while smacking your ass. i’m mumbling now.
you were stat atop of the red heads cock as you feveroushly bounced close to your release, his hands darting towards your tits in a firm grip feeling your nipples harden in his palms.
his one hand drifting to your waist to encourage grinding movements while the other gripped the column of your throat feeling your smooth adam’s apple bob beneath his palm.
“you look angelic on top of me, angel.” he praised, following a groan as his cock twitched inside of you.
“daddy- please, can i cum? please let me cum.” you pleaded, almost out of breath from all of the movements you had been continuously making seated on top of him.
“go on darling— cum.” he started, taking a moment to groan as his own orgasam quickly approached him too. your body almost going limp, relying on his two hands gripping the sides of your waist to continue the grinding movements as his own seed shot inside your velvet walls. your moan high pitched as his low-groan in sync.
your body slipped off of his cock, and resting on top of his freckled pectorals attempting to catch your breath.
“my sweet girl, always so good f’me.”
G = Goofy (Are they more serious in the moment, or are they humorous, etc)
i feel like he has his moments where he accidentally tickles you, or he might crack a joke or maybe an accidental head butt. other than that i feel like he’d be completely serious almost like he’s a diff person in bed.
he was moving at an unfathomable pace, his chuck buried into your cunt. the side of his face sunken into the column of your neck feeling his groans vibrate against your soft skin.
“fuck.” he groaned into you, as your arched your back into his clenched torso feeling his muscles rub against your bare skin. you released a moan in pleasure as his cock prodded at the beginning of your cervix.
his pace started to falter as he slurred into the shell of your ear, “want you to make a mess all over me, —my cumslut.”
he groaned again, as you released yourself all over his cock and throughly coating it.
you were drenched, this got him to his orgasam faster. “my messy little slut.”
H = Hair (How well groomed are they, does the carpet match the drapes, etc.)
question of the day: does the carpet match the drapes. i think yes. i think he’s shaven but not cleanly shaven like he doesn’t fully shave there’s still SOME hair there.
manz could not give less of a fuck if you just shave or if u havent shaven for a literal month he would fuck/go down on you at ANY time.
I = Intimacy (How are they during the moment, romantic aspect…)
at first i think he struggled because he didn’t really know how to make it special but his way of showing intimacy during the do is prasing you with small kisses and just very slow and passionate. 
“beautiful, angel.” he murmured into the skin of your arched torso, moving his lips up as he continued with his praise and wet kisses.
“you’re so ethereal, my y/n. so beautifully layed out for me like this.” this time, he whispered into the skin of your breast bone suckling then leaving a small mark, before pressing a small kiss to it and moving up to to your throat.
“all to myself, my darling girl.” pressing small kisses under the shell of your ear.
“glowing like an angel.” this time the mumble of praise was against the skin of your inner thigh, sending a vibration into your skin.
“all mine. forever ‘n ever.”
J = Jack Off (Masturbation headcanon)
either he does it to much or literally not at all. because he would much prefer your hands or mouth to his, he just feels like you know his body so much better.
“fuck— y/n.” he stuttered out with a groan. the sight of you on your knees for him, your hand wrapped around the girth of his cock and the other keeping yourself steady by holding his clenched thigh made his thoughts run wild.
“you’re so s-sexy— on your knees for me. just like that, fuck.” he moaned, head falling back jaw going slack in pleasure.
“knowing my weak spots so well.” he continued, precum leaking from his tip and his cock begging for a release.
you sped your pace, his prick spurting out his cum all over the hard would floor of his dormitory.
“ahh- fuck.” he groaned finishing his high.
“knowing my weak spots so utterly well, my darling. you deserve a reward, yeah?”
K = Kink (One or more of their kinks)
two words: size. kink.
that man has a literal FETISH at the fact he could throw you around at his will.
“would you look at that, dear?” his voice hoarse, and his eyes diverting to the bottom of your belly.
an imprint of his cock moving in and out of your pussy. his pupils blew with lust barely seeing his blue iris, grabbing both of your cheeks in his large hand moving your gaze to where he was erratically moving in and out of you.
he snatched your palm pressing it to yourself so you could feel him moving in and out of your cervix.
your back arched into him, a moan vibrations into his chest feeling so much full and so much smaller than his large body due to training from quidditch.
“it’s like ‘ve claimed you. all to myself.”
L = Location (Favourite places to do the do)
ronald billius weasley is a voyer at heart. so his favourite location would be the gryffindor common room couch right by the fire.
“shh— y’know i love your noises but if someone gets down here we’re going to be caught. understand?” his hand craining over your mouth and looking into your swirling irises making sure you understood.
both of his rings looped over your fingers as his fingers thrusted in and out of you. you bit your lip a slight vermillion covering the bottom of your lip and a metallic taste on the tip of your tongue as you tried to hold back your moans.
your eyes proceeding to roll back to your head and your own head falling back in his grasp as he brought you closer to your orgasam and still attempting to be quiet in the depths of the night, on the ruby couch.
the fire being the only light source, his hands easily finding their way to your cunt and hitting your g-spot with his fingers.
“ron— fuck!” your voice muffled by his hand still covering your mouth.
M = Motivation (What turns them on, gets them going)
when u touch him a specific way. ron isn’t an idiot and he can decipher when you’re innocently touching him and when your touching him that’s gonna lead to something else.
in the middle of the great hall, dinner time. ron normally would’ve been stuffing his face in delight; instead your hand was steadily gripping his upper thigh as he attempted to eat to distract his mind from the hard on growing from your touch.
“y/n.” he lowly growled in your direction. “yes?”you turned in his direction, seeing his crimson face. you bat your eyelashes at him feigning innocence.
he moved his face closer to yours, touching the shell of your ear with his slightly chapped lips.
“you better prepare that pretty pussy of yours to not walk for a month after i’m done with you, brat.”
N = NO (Something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)
during sex i feel like he wouldn’t want anyone else to see you, like you’re for his eyes only. like your his prized possession that he has all to himself and he definitely doesn’t wanna share, so i feel like he wouldn’t be into threesomes or anything.
“c’mon ickle ronniekins, you know they always say ‘sharing is caring.’ and i’m personally offended.” fred teased his little brother on his sex life with girlfriend after finding out ron had lost his virginity and wasn’t their “ickle ronniekins anymore”.
“oi, sharing is caring i mean if fred can then so can i.” george added, both the twins were simply just trying to rile ron up and get on his nerves.
they had no interest in having sex with his girlfriend but today they were feeling particularly annoying and wanted to see how far they could push him till he had a tantrum.
“but she did pick me and not you two sod’s, right?” ron quipped.
“so i don’t believe she’s particularly interested in any other person besides me, and i don’t share.”
O = Oral (Preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc)
ron would literally eat pussy everyday if he wanted to, and HE DOES. literally hours he could spend under your skirt it’s like HEAVEN TO HIM.
“sir! so sore, m’so sore.” you whimpered as he continued to swipe his tongue through your glistenening folds and around your cunt.
this has been your third time of the night cumming on his tongue, and he wouldn’t stop until you atleast did four.
your ankles were locked behind his head, both of his hands squeezing at the sides of your thighs; his rings and kneading of the flesh guaranteed to leave marks.
“m’gonna cum— please can i—“ you stuttered out trying to have atleast one coherent thought.
“go on angel, wanna feel you on my tongue.”
P = Pace (Are they fats and rough? Slow and sensual? etc.)
ron is fast but ron is passionate, i feel like if it was rough and fast it would just feel too rushed and he doesn’t want that so he has a fast pace but it’s also really passionate in the way he’s lovin u up.
“bunny— make me feel so good.” he crooned into your ear, feeling his breath on your neck.
he was thrusting in and out of you, well on your way to your third orgasam of the night. after switching positions and paces this one finally felt perfect.
one hand wrapped around your lower back and his other forearm knealt by the side of your face. your legs were locked around his lower back and your hands interlocked around his neck, previously scratching down his back feeling the muscles clench as your nails ran down; he was guaranteed to be teased when changing into his quidditch uniform tommorow.
his pace was fast moving quickly, but prasing your every move and showering your body in kisses.
he never deferred from making you feel any less than loved, even when being degraded or punished you knew he would shower you in praise and food. loving you in your most vulnerable state.
Q = Quickie (Their opinions on quickies rather than proper sex, how often, etc.)
i don’t think he really likes them? he doesn’t really hav enough time to do what he wants with you. like i don’t think he would want a quick fuck in a class room bc he was horny, he would just take you to his dorm for the rest of the day.
“so, so aroused you couldn’t even wait till after dinner.” you pouted at his standing figure, while you were seated on the bed spreading your legs for his use.
“and i’m the desperate slut, daddy? don’t you think that’s a bit hypocritical.” you whined at him, batting your eyelashes.
“bunny, you better watch your tone.” his slacks falling to the ground, “i’ll take you over my knee right now.”
“you gonna spank me?” whimpering, trying to push him limits.
“if you keep acting like a little brat, i will.” he said while approaching your spread body.
R = Risk (Are they game to experiment, do they take risks, etc.)
as long as your comfortable with it, i feel like he would be okay with it. i mean it is your pleasure that matters most to him at the end of the day.
“and you’re sure?” he confirmed, holding the silk blindfold in between his trembling fingers. He was nervous about trying something where you couldn’t see what he was doing.
you nodded to him, looking into his blue irises full of certainty. “hundred percent. if something happens i’ll call safeword.” you assured him grabbing his hand bringing it towards your face.
“and that is?”
“red.”
“good, good.” he murmured the last word tying it around your eyes, ridding you of sight. you settled on your back against the plaid comforter hugging the mattress.
“ready?”
“ready.” you stated, feeling the cool sensation of ice glide against your stomach.
S = Stamina (How many rounds can they go for, how long do they last…)
ATLEAST FOUR. he plays quidditch. he’s sexy. he’s ron. HE can last ATLEAST four rounds.
“daddy— no more, s-so sore.” you begged as he hovered over you, his finger tips dancing on your clit. you hissed, at the feeling of pins and needles over your over sensitive cunt.
“but weren’t you begging earlier? you wanted to be a little brat and just wanted to be full? what happen to that messy girl?” he taunted, looking down at your sqriming body.
you whined as he continued to draw figure eights on your clit, already stimulating you to the point of another orgasam.
“mhm, daddy, fuck!” you whimpered, moans bubbling from your throat as you felt a burning sensation starting to tremble in your stomach
“daddy!”
T = Toy (Do they own toys? Do they use them? On a partner or themselves?)
i feel like when he is punishing you he would use a vibrator on you but tie you up and edge and overstimulate you till you learned your lesson. other than that i don’t think so because he likes teasing you himself rather than using something else.
the vibrations of a small device pressing directly on your small, overstimulated puffy, bundle of nerves and pushed out two orgasams of you already.
“daddy! no more— please! m’sorry, m’so so sorry!” you whined as your legs subconsciously shook and quivered in the grasp of the ropes around your body.
he turned up the speed, increasing your whimpers. “but, you my brat, were a bad girl. who gave you permission to flirt with harry like that?” he said completely turning off the device and waiting a few seconds before turning it up to maximum speed.
you jumped up at the reoccurring vibrations. “nobody, nobody! i jus’ wanted your attention, daddy! only you.” you slurred, your face burying into the mattress and your legs fought against your restraints.
“well all you had to do was ask, dove. now this is what happens when you’re bad.” he smirked at your figure turned away from him.
U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)
every opportunity he has, he teases. he likes to give and take away your pleasure any time he wants just because he can. and he loves seeing you squirm for him.
he had edged you five times, you were a brat, like always but you thought he atleast would’ve given into your whining and begs by now.
“sir! please, ‘ve been a good girl. i swear it!” you said frantically as your legs squirmed due to his manipulation.
“but good girls aren’t brats, are they?” he questioned to you, you looked at him on your forearms and your quivering legs in his grasp.
“but m’sorry, please sir!”
he thought for a moment, should he give in? but seeing you so vulnerable made him want to edge you longer just to see you beg for his touch.
“hmm, baby. no” he slurred through a hoarse tone, continuing to deny your orgasams.
V = Volume (How loud they are, what sounds they make)
it’s mainly grunts and moans, with a bit of praise mixed with degrations.
“ahh fuck— angel.” he grunted, steadying a pace into your pussy. “my good little girl, letting me use her cunt.”
“aren’t you my pretty little cumdump?” his hand grasping the column of your throat making you look at him.
you nodded at him gasping as we squeezing and continued thrusting into him.
“daddy!” you gasped as he bumped your cervix with his cock that was begging for release.
he moaned at the name, continuing his praise mixed with degrations. “my messy little cumslut— isn’t what you are?” his tone firm as he grasped your cheek in his one hand making your lips in a pout.
“yes, daddy.”
W = Wild Card (Get a random headcanon for the character of your choice)
he would take polaroids of you during sex.
“my pretty little pussy.” he murmured snapping a polaroid of his cum leaking out of you.
“such a messy girl.” he said while fanning out the picture and looking at your limp, worn-out and flush body.
“ron, make sure you put it with the other ones- fuck!” you breathed out to him until you felt his fingers dig into the the walls of your pussy.
“gotta make sure it all stays in there, dove.”
X = X-Ray (Let’s see what’s going on in those pants, picture or words)
i’d give him like 7-8 hard? BUT HES THICK
your lips were hollowed around his girth, sucking and licking his tip in your mouth.
he moaned at the feeling of your glossy lips around his prick sucking to the base cock.
“fuck— angel. m’gonna—“ he slurred out in euphoria trying to manage a coherent sentence when all he could think about how beautiful you looked with your lips hollowed around his cock and tears mixed with mascara running down the apples of your cheeks.
you fastened your pace around his cock, his tip bumping against your reflex causing a small gag to erupt from your throat. you payed no mind to it continuing to breath from your nose until he shot his seed pouring down your throat.
“fuck me, y/n.”
Y = Yearning (How high is their sex drive?)
i feel like it all depends on you? like he’s a horny teenage boy but nothing really gets him going like you do tbh. like if you ever did something sexy or something that could be innocent but has his mind running wild then yes but other than that it’s all on your sex drive.
Z = ZZZ (… how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)
i feel like after the both of you are finished eating he kisses the top of your head and the both of you fall asleep together in eachothers arms.
“my beautiful angel. always doing so well f’me.” he murmured against your hair, gripping the remote with one hand switching off the movie as your eyelids began to slowly droop down. your eyelashes dusting against the apples of your cheeks; you were so fucked out, so vulnerable, so beautiful.
he pushed the rest of the snacks onto the floor, trying to be quiet and not disturb your peace. knowing that he, or rather you would pick up off the floor.
he settled himself on the pillows stroking your hair, his own eyes dropping down as his one hand rubbed your back and the other massaging the root of your hair.
“i love you, my sweets.” he whispered before falling asleep.
taglist: @mushroomfleur @famdomhideout
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liviz-luv · 6 years ago
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1-100 you coward
i love you anon, i hope you know that.
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1: How tall or short do you wish you were?Surprisingly I like being 5′2/5′3, i just wish people weren’t so darn tall. I mean i really have to break my neck just to look at Freshmen. FRESHMEN!
2: What’s your dream pet? (Real or not)A puppy and kitty, I also want a Dragon and a Hydra (from Greek Mythology).
3: Do you have a favorite clothing style?I really like the American style from the ‘70s and back. But I’m a sucker for ‘90s grunge/punk. I also like really cute aesthetic things.
4: What was your favorite video game growing up?Marvel’s Ultimate Alliance 1 & 2. MAN i remember being a lil toddler and holding the 360 controller and going ham on that game with my parents, older sister and uncle… good times good time. THANKFULLY XBOX ONE HAS IT TOO AND I PLAY IT LIKE IT’S MY SOULMATE!
5: What three things/people do you think of most each day:School, Stress, Sleep.
6: If you had a warning label, what would yours say?It would have to say sumn’ like: “BEWARE! Easily hurt, but will not hesitate to put you in your place.” Or “Likes Cuddles, Physical attention and Attention in general,” Or “Watch your S/O She’s out” Or “WARNING! Confident Gay but Panicked Heterosexual/Straight”.
7: What is your opinion on [insert person/thing here]?UHH….yes. Jk, um. My opinion on Zodiac/Horoscope/Tarot Reading.
I just like to read personality traits of diff Zodiac signs (Black women understand), that’s about it. I personally steer away from anything other than that, just my personal preferences, but i’m not here to say that i reject people like that or shame them, i respect everything as much as possible. 
8: What is your Greek personality type? [Sanguine, Phlegmatic, Choleric, or Melancholic]surprisingly i have no idea what  this means, and i’m a Ancient Greek fanatic.
Okay now i do, It says that i’m Sanguine, but i noticed that i was tied with both Sanguine and Melancholic. not really sure what that means….but okay.
9: Are you ticklish?No. not really that is.
10: Are you allergic to anything?bullcrap. stupidity. really though, Pineapple Kiwi and Milk.
11: What’s your sexuality?
bi.
12: Do you prefer tea, coffee, or cocoa?all three.
13: Are you a cat or dog person?Dog person by nature. Although i love cats, i have a soft abyss for dogs
14: Would you rather be a vampire, elf, or merperson?
UP WHERE THEY STAY ALL DAY IN THE SUN!
A MERMAID!!! I have had the biggest crush on mermaids since before i could remember.
15: Do you have a favorite Youtuber?Liza Koshy, exosexo, and many more, just ask me for a part two. i love crack video youtubers
16: How tall are you?
5′2/5′3 not really sure, just that i’m fun sized. :)
17: If you had to change your name, what would you change it to?When I was younger, I had this odd fixation with the name Victoria, and Jade. then last week i found out that when my grandmother was choosing a name form my youngest uncle my mother had a fixation on Victoria also. so maybe it a genetic fixation.
18: How much do you weigh? [Only ask this if you know the user doesn’t mind!]last time i checked i weighed 120lbs, but i never get heavier than 125 so any where in between could be true. 54.43klg - 56.69klg
19: Do you believe in ghosts/spirits?angles & demons: yes, ghosts: no, well more like supernatural. Like a ‘ghost’ of a person living on in your thoughts and memories, then yes, ‘ghosts’ are real.
20: Do you like space or the ocean more?trick question. I love both too much. the stars are full of wonder and mystery. the ocean is full of questions and fright.
21: Are you religious?maybe…not really sure. I definitely know that i respect people and their faiths because that’s how i was raised and i don’t like blasphemy of any kind.
22: Pet peeves?ignorance, being judgmental ect.23: Would you rather be nocturnal or diurnal [opposite of nocturnal]?nocturnal. i am a natural night owl, AND I AIN’T CHANGING!
24: Favorite constellation?
oof. i really have no idea, maybe the Libra constellation because that’s my Zodiac
25: Favorite star?
second star to the right, and straight on till morning. (if you get that reference, you are now my favorite person). the north star that lead the slaves to FREEDOM!
26: Do you like ball-jointed dolls?
no and yes, no because they look creppy and yes because they are easier to use as a drawing model.
27: Any phobias or fears?
acrophobia, claustrophobia, uhhh, atelophobia, many more. Sleep paralysis (that is soo scary and it happens frequently to me too.) 
28: Do you think global warming is real?
have you walked outside?????? i want your opinion. because i know that Global Warming is a real thing and it is happening.
29: Do you believe in reincarnation?
no.
30: Favorite movie?anything Marvel, Disney, 60s and back… anything Tom Holland, Benedict Cumberbatch, Tom Hardy, Ryan Reynolds, or Pokémon.
31: Do you get scared easily?no. not really. it’s gotta be some outta this world creepy mess and demonic stuff.
32: How many pets have you own in your lifetime?
a few fish when i was a lil tot, then a puppy, two cats, and a bunny right now. his name is Ash Ketchum.
33: Blog rate? [You’ll rate the blog of the one who’s asking.]
this was an anon, but imma say 100/10
34: What is a color that calms you?
blue, pastels.
35: Where would you like to travel and/or live?
Anywhere outside of America. I always wanted to go to Africa, Puerto Rico France & Italy to see my heritage, and South Korea so that i can get a feel of the culture up close and in real time.
36: Where were you born?
in a hospital. on Earth.
37: What is your eye color?
Dark Chocolate.
38: Introvert or extrovert?
Ambivert with Introvert tendencies.
39: Do you believe in horoscopes and zodiacs?
zodiac, yes. Horoscopes, no. But I understand where people get the belief that the horoscope will help you live ‘your best life’ i guess you could say. but personally no.
40: Hugs or kisses?
hugs. physical contact beyond that freaks me out. but i like it.
41: Who is someone you would like to see/visit right now?
my bias list and family, and my tumblr friends and tumblr crushes, and my friends i don’t get to see on a regular basis.
42: Who is someone you love deeply?
Do people on my bias list count (no.)…oh okay. uh, i guess my family.
43: Any piercings you want?
i remember in middle school i was abosultly in love with the Emo scene (still am tho) and I wanted Plugs(i have two), and snake bites. My mom never objected…but still idk i still want them, but i’m afraid of needles
44: Do you like tattoos and piercings?
have you seen B.A.P, GOT7 or Jay Park. or any person who makes Emo/Post-Hardecore/Punk music?? IS THAT EVEN A QUESTION??!! REALLY THO
45: Do you smoke or have you eiver done so?
yes. i vaped and i smoked weed. i don’t recommend because it’s not good for you. please don’t hate me.
46: Talk about your crush, if you have one!
he teaches my lil bro to play Saxophone. he’s a senior, uhhhhhh. he’s honest, and taller than me. but i mean anyone could be taller that me. and he helps me write lyrics, and he doesn’t know i like him. oooh~ he and i both fought for the top shelves because we’re tops and alphas. so it’s funny.
47: What is a sound you really hate?
loud unneeded sounds, loud voices for no reason.
48: A sound you really love?
music, laughs from my friends, baby laughs. the voice of people i love. crunching leaves, the sound of my tea kettle, popcorn. dogs barking, cats meowing.
49: Can you do a backflip?
nope
50: Can you do the splits?
nope
51: Favorite actor and/or actress?
marvel. Angelina Jolie, Will Smith, Jada Pinkett-Smith, Noah Centeno ect. ZENDAY AND TOM HOLLAND 
52: Favorite movie?
Spider-Man (all of them), really old ones Like Shirly Temple movies. Disney, ect.
53: How are you feeling right now?
tired.
54: What color would you like your hair to be right now?
blue, anything pastel really
55: When did you feel happiest?
when i’m listening to new music and i get lost in it. heck when i’m listening to music and i get lost in it. when i talk about something that i’m passionate about. when i’ve somehow cheated the system by making someone feel special
56: Something that calms you down?
sleep.
57: Have any mental disorders? [Only ask this if you know the user doesn’t mind!]
depression, anxiety, social anxiety, O.C.D, i’m not sure about one were you detach yourself from your ‘mind’ and just become numb to everything, but yeh got that. 
58: What does your URL mean?
bde-wonho-yoongi. It was supposed to be bde-soft-wonho-yoongi, but i said naah. it just means that they radiate dominance and i love people like that. like it drives me insane cuz i demand dominance too, so it’s like who will come out on top.
59: What three words describe you the most?
Scary, Caring, Sleep
60: Do you believe in evolution?
no.
61: What makes you unfollow a blog?
porn, mainly just because i was not prepared for it. Hate speech, and ignorance
62: What makes you follow a blog?
having content that i look for.
63: Favorite kind of person:
Someone like my best friend @rome-arrow. Someone who understands me and some how can handle my antics. Someone who listens.
64: Favorite animal(s):
the living kind/
65: Name three of your favorite blogs.
other than my mutual @monstaxnight @minmindreams @wonhopes
66: Favorite emoticon:
😂🤣😅😆😉😊😋😎😍😐😑😶😢😭😛😜😝
67: Favorite meme:
oof yall already know
68: What is your MBTI personality type?
Mediator (INFP-t)
69: What is your star sign?
Libra AND PROUD
70: Can your dog roll over on command, if you have a dog?
i think of i tried her enough then when she was around she would have
71: What outfit out of all your clothes do you like to wear the most?
skinny black jeans, baggy flannel a band tee, snap-back and some shades.
72: Post a selfie or two?
now?? uuh it won’t let me add it. Just go on my website and look under the link “me”
73: Do you have platform shoes?
nope
74: What is one random but interesting fact about yourself?
i’m double jointed.
75: Can you do a front flip?
on a trampoline.
76: Do you like birds?
yes
77: Do you like to swim?
i don’t know how…. but yes. i like being in water
78: Is swimming or ice skating more fun to you?
neither. i don’t know how to do either. but i preferer swimming
79: Something you wish didn’t exist:
pain
80: Some thing you wish did exist:
mythological beings
81: Piercings you have?
ears.
82: Something you really enjoy doing:
sleeping, writing, reading, listening to music
83: Favorite person to talk to:
@rome-arrow
84: What was your first impression of Tumblr?
I heard Troye Sivan and Dan & Phil talking about it so i was like sure, and i some of my favorite memes come from here. so i thought it was a safe place. and it is for now.
85: How many followers do you have?
94
86: Can you run a mile within ten minutes?
hell no
87: Do your socks always match?
nope
88: Can you touch your toes and keep your legs straight completely?
only with my left side
89: What are your birthstones?
Opal
90: If you were an animal, which one would you be?
prob a Puppy or Kola, or Sloth, or a cheetah (i used to be the fasted person on my middle school track/cross country team. and when i was a little girl i wanted one as a pet and i wanted to be one ‘when i grew up’
91: If a flower could aesthetically represent you, what kind would it be?
dead rose. it’s cliché but not all at the same time. It’s a glimpse of the dead past in our hands, plus they smell good.
92: A store you hate?
Spencer’s.
93: How many cups of coffee can you drink in one day?
as many as i want
94: Would you rather be able to fly or read minds?
fly. so that i could get places faster
95: Do you like to wear camo?
yes
96: Winter or summer?
summer
97: How long can you hold your breath for?
as long as it takes me to see the promised land.
98: Least favorite person?
my biological father
99: Someone you look up to:
my mother
100: A store you love?
Hottopic
I’M DONE WOOOOOOOOO
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GIVE ME MORE STUFF
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monsterparty1989 · 7 years ago
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big ol dream post; many dreams from multiple diff (out of order) dates
(sorry if the readmore doesnt work on mobile)
i drew a couple of pics for some of these dreams but not all of them. the ones that don’t have drawings will have some fairly-accurate images accompanying them
dream 1 - date unknown
i had a dream that i went into a local restaurant with my mom, dad, and brother. the restaurant in real life is very small, and it started that way in the dream-- however, as time went on the restaurant's floors and ceilings began to stretch out far. i had gotten up to go use the restroom, and when i came out the restaurant had grown so much that i got lost. as i was wandering around, i noticed some of the guests had begun to distort or just straight up turn into animals or monsters.  there was a child who was following me around, and when i told him to please leave me alone, he held up a large kitchen knife and started chasing me-- eventually i get away, but when i see him in the distance, he looks like this;
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(idk why i drew him twice)
he stalked me through the rest of the dream, but i dont think i really encountered him again face to face, i just saw him walking around. 
anyway, as i kept trying to find my way back to my table, the restaurant began to fizzle and dissolve away as more and more guests turned into monsters/animals/at this point just vanishing.  eventually the walls and floors were gone completely, leaving a vast pitch black void. the restaurant’s decorations remained floating there however, such as the tables and chairs + lighting fixtures, but things like paintings distorted as well, into bright vivid alien looking creatures whose eyes would follow you. also, to avoid falling, i’d decided to float around on a hollow galapagos tortoise shell. 
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i’m not entirely sure what happens after this point. i remember looking for something other than my table but i don’t know what it was. i think in the end i fell down into the void and woke up. 
dream 2 - 9/20/16
in this dream i’m babysitting a small child, and he tells me of a place that only other little kids can go. a place that adults can’t even see. however at the time of the dream i was 17 so i was still “technically” a kid, so i was able to see it. he leads me there, to one of the most frightening locations i’ve been to in a dream. 
it looks like a garage, placed on a busy street corner. adults pass by and dont even glance at it, but there are children my age and younger, even so young as about 7 years old hanging around it.
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  the garage itself is very old and dirty looking even on the outside, the walls are painted with the 3 primary colors, but they are cracked and chipped, but also not somehow faded. the inside is fairly small, maybe about 15x15 feet.  the walls are dingy plain white, with dirt smeared all over them. the floor is hard concrete, as dirty and stained as the walls are. however, near the far right corner of the garage, the dirt seems to accumulated a lot. on the far right corner in the floor there is a metal chute, just large enough for a child to fit into. its rusted and there are clearly dried blood stains all over the inside and around the entrance. 
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as i’m peering down the chute a child of about 12 walks up to me and says that all the cool kids hang out around here-- and the even cooler kids aren’t scared to jump down the chute.  i say to him, if he’s so cool then why doesn’t he jump in? he pushes me back and climbs inside, falling into the long dark hole.  i hear metal clanging as he hits the sides of the metal grate, yelps of pain as skin scrapes on the walls. eventually, it’s quiet.
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the children gathered around outside are staring in, staring at the grate, hypnotized. the child i’m babysitting seems to mindlessly follow after the older boy and climbs into the grate. i panic and grab his arm as he falls down into the grate and i get pulled down into it too. everything goes dark for a moment, before i open my eyes. i’m in a dimly lit purple room, and the floor is soggy with blood.
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there are no bodies around me that i can see, however in front of me is one of the weirdest dream monsters i’ve had. it’s human.. kind-of. its in some sort of motorized wheelchair that is melded to its body, and it can only move at an extremely slow pace. it has a bulbous and greasy neck, with beady insect eyes still the size and shape of human eyes, just bugging out of its head. it’s slack-jawed, with gnarled rotten human teeth. it didn’t ever move or talk or anything. on the arm of the “wheelchair” there’s a very strange device i couldn’t figure out what was.
i’m trying to stand up but i’m injured from my fall. i realize that this creature is very very slowly moving towards me. i have nowhere to run, the room is only about as big as the garage was, and my injuries are making it hard to move. i try to stay away from this thing but it ever so slowly keeps chase. eventually, i get tired and collapse.  i then discover that the device on the arm of its chair was made to grind parts of your body up individually while keeping you alive and completely conscious. 
typing it out and reading it is not as scary as it was experiencing it. i was shivering when i woke up. 
dream 3 - 9/27/16
this ones not particularly scary i just like the “monster” in it in this dream i felt an itchy sting on my leg, and when i inspected it there was  a giant blood clot sticking out of my skin. i tell my mom and i’m rushed to a doctor’s office, and in that office all of the patients are all different monsters; none malicious however, just there for their checkups i guess? they had heads like detailed halloween masks, they were very cool looking anyway i get called into the Doctor Room, where the doctor is standing in the corner, facing away, and when the door closes he turns around and says in a very cartoonish voice: “what seEEEeEEEEeeeeEEEms to be the PrOOOoooOOBLEM!!” and dream me is like. well. this is a good doctor obviously.  he’s in surgeons scrubs and wearing a cartoon wolf halloween mask, like this:
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i try to play along and i say “well doc, i’ve got some bad news...” and trailing off saying “i’ve got a huge blood clot on my leg.”
he sits me down in an examination chair thats super low to the ground and really small, leans me back and straps me in. he pulls out a “syringe” which is really a small red plastic water gun with a needle poking out the end of it. he holds it above the blood clot and i say “w-wait! is this gonna hurt..?”.. i can see his eyes through the holes in the mask and he looks infuriated. he dips his hand into some sort of numbing gel and slathers it onto the clot, but then starts rubbing it over my entire leg. he tells me to shut up, and then pulls the water gun’s trigger over the clot, which jabs the needle inside of it, then out. a hole is left where the needle was and blood begins pouring out. “did it work?” i say as i slowly start to pass out. my vision got redder and blurrier as i saw the wolf doctor and my mom standing above me, staring. 
there’s more to this dream but i really just wanted to talk about cartoon wolf doctor, ok
dream 4 - date unknown
for some reason i’m living in my childhood bedroom again and it’s become infested with bugs. they’re extremely large and have no legs, they’re like maggots with chitin. with 3 body sections, beady roach eyes, gigantic ant wings, pale yellow flesh, and a set of blood red mandibles about an inch in length or longer. the ones i found were jabbed into my mattress and were stuck there, writhing and wiggling trying to escape. they were hard to get rid of, because they kept trying to jab into our skin. 
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thats all the ones i wanna write for now. thanks
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danceswithdinosaurs · 7 years ago
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I'm going to skip straight past the vanilla ones because we both know we're past that. Anyway: monsters, size diff, vore, bloodplay, knifeplay, needleplay, CBT
AY now we’re getting to the fun!
Monsters
No | rather not | I dunno | I guess | Sure | Yes | FUCK yes | Oh god you don’t even know |
Now if they are outright monstrous then HELL YES give me that beast. If they are largely just humanoid with some monster features then… still a yes but my enthusiasm dies a little. The real, full deal is just more exciting~
Size diff
No | rather not | I dunno | I guess | Sure | Yes | FUCK yes | Oh god you don’t even know |
I sure do love for my baes to tower over me. It’s hot but anymore I feel myself craving fluff with whatever giant I’m getting stuck with. Kinda like the idea of being the larger one too nowadays too (look a smaller partner is cute alright???)
Vore
No | rather not | I dunno | I guess | Sure | Yes | FUCK yes | Oh god you don’t even know |
We all probably knew this about me but I mcfreakin love Vore. Mostly Hard Vore
Bloodplay
No | rather not | I dunno | I guess | Sure | Yes | FUCK yes | Oh god you don’t even know |
I used to be a little more into it a couple years back on either end. At this point I think I would mostly enjoy it if it was just not me bleeding now (if I’m in the right mood then it’s not so bad)
Knifeplay
No | rather not | I dunno | I guess | Sure | Yes | FUCK yes | Oh god you don’t even know |
idc what anybody says knives and daggers are sexy as it is and I like playing out more dangerous scenarios with it
Needleplay
No | rather not | I dunno | I guess | Sure | Yes | FUCK yes | Oh god you don’t even know |
Needles kind have taken on a different meaning anymore so it’s not that I am squicked out by them but I don’t know how well it would go. But I would be willing to try incorporating it into a more kinky setting
CBT
No | rather not | I dunno | I guess | Sure | Yes | FUCK yes | Oh god you don’t even know | 
before it was a thing I was like “yeah I’d try that maybe once” but I have developed a huge fondness for the idea and tbh anymore with as much as it’s been on the mind it’s almost a little embarrassing (call me the ball breaker because I am coming and so will you when you catch these hands)
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rebeccahpedersen · 6 years ago
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The First Week Back!
TorontoRealtyBlog
I was in the office on January 2nd, to the surprise of nobody, especially not my wife.
I’d had just about as much “time off” as I could handle, and couldn’t wait to get back to the cozy confines of my office.  The only problem was: there are no new listings in the days after New Year’s!
January 2nd was a Wednesday, and very few, if anybody, is going to list a property for sale on January 2nd, 3rd, or 4th.
So this past week was the first true week “back” at it, and while new listings were still scarce, I was pleasantly surprised by the quality of the listings that we did see.
Don’t get me wrong, it’s not nearly enough to satisfy the demand.  But it’s more than expected, and I found myself making three offers for buyers last week, which was surprising for early-January.
I fielded some calls and emails from new prospective buyers and sellers, and by the time the week was done, I realized that the different experiences I’d had might shed some light on the current state of the market, what’s hot and cold, and where the surpluses and deficits lay.
Or, maybe it’s just five days to start the year, which means nothing.  But I can’t help but think it’s the former…
Clients of mine have been looking for a freehold home for over a year.  They came to me after working, unsuccessfully, with another agent (this happens quite a bit in our industry), and were eager to get started in 2019, as soon as listings came about.
To our collective surprise, there was a perfect new listing in their target search area which hit the market on Tuesday.  This is, keep in mind, Tuesday the eighth day of January.  Who in the world would choose to list their home only eight days into the new year?  It was strange, but welcome!
When we first discussed the home, I told my clients, who have a budget of $999,999 due to the obvious mortgage restrictions, “This is a hard-no.  It’s a great house, but even without parking and backing onto a main street, I think this is a $1,050,000 house.”
My clients were obviously disappointed, but I always tell my clients in that price range, “We have to be active in order to be successful.  We need to try to make something happen.”  And while I’m not the type of agent to run around the city making dummy offers (ie. the ones without any chance of being accepted that oh-so-many buyer-agents make), I told my buyers that I would chat with the agent.
The agent was admittedly bearish on the market, and so too were her clients.
I asked her point-blank, “Is this a high-$900’s house, in your opinion?” and she said, “Absolutely, my clients are reasonable.”
I further asked her, “Would they be interested in a bully offer?” and before I could finish the sentence, she was already telling me that, indeed, they would be.
She questioned the timing of the listing, and the condition of the market.  She told me her clients were reasonable people, and they didn’t have any illusions of grandeur.
So we put together an offer for $999,000, obtained a bank draft for a deposit, and submitted the offer at 2:00pm with an 8:00pm irrevocable.  The timing is always tough with bully offers; you don’t want to give the seller too much time, ie. 11:59pm in this case, as we would fear the door to other offers coming in is left far too wide, but you also can’t shove it down their throat by giving them an hour to decide.  The house, by the way, was listed at $874,990.
At about 3:30pm, the agent called me to say, “They’re going to work with the offer,” which in bully-offer terminology basically means, “We are going to forego our scheduled next-Wednesday offer night, and accept your offer, provided another offer doesn’t come in and beat it.”
The last part of that sentence is never said, but inferred.
If the seller decides to “work with” the offer, it means that they’re now going to get the ball rolling, so to speak, and call all the other agents who have shown the property to let them know that there is a bully offer, and it will be presented that evening.
As an aside, were are still seeing a handful of listings that specify, “Seller Reserves The Right To Consider Pre-Emptive Offers Without Notice,” which is illegal, and was a problem back in the spring of 2017, but those agents are mostly discount brokerages and fly-by-nighters that you’d expect this behaviour from.
In any event, my clients and I waited on pins and needles to see if our offer would have legs.
The first step was now complete: we had convinced the seller to move up their offer review day, and convinced them to work with our offer, which was well below what we thought was fair market value for the home, but the sellers seemed to think the price was fantastic!  Now we had to hope that we would catch the market sleeping, and that other buyers wouldn’t materialize, and wouldn’t be able to get their act together to draft an offer and procure a bank draft within 3-4 hours.
As is always almost the case, however, two more offers were submitted by 6:30pm.
And when I called the agent at 7:00pm, I could hear it in her voice.  You just know by the way they pick up the phone.
Along with our bully offer, there were four more offers in the end.
And by 8:00pm, the property had sold firm for, wait for it……..$1,050,000.
Hmmmmmm….silver lining?  That I pegged the price?
Do we take any solace in the “efficient market,” in that this house sold for what it was worth?
Irrespective of my clients’ situation, I suppose.  But the entire point of this excursion was to try to catch the market off-guard in early January, and yet the market countered our offense with brilliant defence, and the house sold for what it should have.
What does it say about the market that only one week into the year, a house is selling for 20% over list, with five offers on a bully attempt?  What does it say about the market that four other buyers came to the offer table, within three hours of a bully offer being submitted, all in the first damn week of January?
It tells me that the market is resilient, at least in this price point.
Later in the week, I was called in to price a Scarborough home which I noted had been languishing on the market for the better part of two years.
This house was listed for sale in March of 2017 at a price that, even then, seemed really high, and then sat on the market through the spring and summer.
It was a beautiful house, but a new-build in an area that was full of new builds, and while the getting wasn’t just good, but rather great in 2016 and into 2017 for builders, things really cooled off in April of 2017.
The house was eventually rented out in the fall of 2017, and that lease expired by the end of 2018.  The tenants are now on a month-to-month lease.
I met with the seller at his home, and we weren’t alone.  A family of six was present in the house, although it felt as if a family of at least twelve lived there, based on all the stuff.  Call me a minimalist, that’s fine.  I’m O.C.D. and I like things a certain way, not to mention I hate clutter.  But I’m being fair with respect to this home when I say it was a……hmmm…….what would I call it….
…..rat’s nest?
That’s harsh.  But I don’t care.
This house was a rat’s nest.  It was God-awful.  I simply cold not believe what tenants had done to this house in such a short amount of time.
And yet the photos of this house from when it was up for sale in 2017 show a gorgeous renovation, with gleaming, never-used-before features, in a never-lived-in house.
I found it to be very odd to present my market analysis to the owner in front of the tenants, but the owner didn’t seem to mind, and the tenants (the father, at least) was extremely curious.
I went through my evaluation with the seller, and I could tell by his body language that he didn’t like what I had to show him.
This house was on the market for $1,299,900 in March of 2017 when it was probably “worth” $1,200,000 and yet it still could have sold for that ridiculous price, only because everything was selling back then.  By the time July rolled around, he’d have been lucky to get $1,150,000 for it, and perhaps I’m just being generous here, and feeling his pain.
I compared his home to every single new-build that had sold in the past 24 months, making adjustments for every conceivable feature: bedrooms, bathrooms, square footage, garage and/or parking situation, lot frontage, lot depth, location, features/finishes, school district, proximity to transit, etc.
I used four different metrics for the time adjustment:
1) GTA average home price 2) 416 average home price 3) 416 average detached home price 4) Scarborough average detached home price
I showed him what his home would be worth with all the adjustments, and then each of the adjustments for time shown above.  Then I showed him what it would be worth with an average of those four, just for good measure.
In the end, I felt that the 416 average detached home price metric made the most sense, since there weren’t enough sales in Scarborough to avoid a sample size error.
I concluded that his home was worth $1,100,000, but we could try listing for $1,169,000 for a short period to see if we have any bites, and perhaps let buyers feel that they’re getting a “deal” if we dropped the price by $50,000, either in a negotiation, or via revised listing after 30-45 days.  This listing, I told him, would be a long, drawn out process due to the current market conditions for this home in this area.
With his arms across his chest, he said, “I wouldn’t sell for less than $1.4 Million.”
What would be going through your mind, if you were in my position?
I was just floored.  Absolutely gobsmacked.
“Do you think that your house is worth $1.4 Million?” I asked, “Or do you mean that you wouldn’t sell for less than $1.4 Million?”
“What does it matter?” he asked me.
I explained that it matters because I would love to wave a $20 bill around in the parking lot at Best Buy, offering to part with it for $25, but I didn’t think I would have any success.  I explained that “wants” and “needs” are two different things, and there is zero correlation.
“I want $1.4 Million for my house,” he told me, “And if you want my listing, you’ll get me my price,” he explained.
I told him in as respectful a way as possible that I didn’t want his listing at $1.4 Million, and that nobody would get him his price.  Further, any agent that did want his listing at $1.4 Million should represent an immediate red flag in his field of vision.
I knew this wasn’t going anywhere, so I asked him, “Just to confirm – this house will be vacant when it’s for sale, correct?”
He presented a bit of a cocky smile, as I think that by this point, he didn’t like me, and he said, “Now why would I do that?”
This was tough, given the tenant was sitting right next to me, but I believe in this business, truth trumps feelings, so I said, “This house shows poorly.  Very poorly.  When I list properties for sale, I recommend that they are vacated, cleaned, painted, staged, and marketed.”
“Let me tell you something about the math,” he responded, as I literally began writing this blog post in my head.  “I’m getting $3,000 per month in rent for this house.  I can’t afford to have it sit vacant for two months while you rearrange the furniture, then have it sit for another five or six.”
Playing on his theme, I said, “My math tells me that eight months represents a paltry $24,000 in lost revenue, and yet you’re about $300,000 high on the price of the home.”
He went on to explain that every month he had the tenant in the house, he lost $5,000.  He was leveraged up the you-know-what on this project, and had a construction loan to boot.  He had apparently lost $75,000 by holding this home for 15 months, which is why he figured he could simply add that number to his original ask of $1,299,900, and then round up for good measure.
I left on cordial terms, asked him to keep my evaluation, and encouraged him to look it over with whichever agent he hires to list the property.  I told him that a small loss is better than a large loss, and that it might make sense to cut the cord.  I explained that not every builder/flipper/renovator makes money on the first go-around, and that in the long run, he would look back at this a small bump on the road.  I felt like his mother, trying to put a positive spin on getting beat up at school; something like, “They pick on you because they’re jealous of you!”  But in the end, I could tell my words were falling on deaf ears.
That home will never sell for anything close to what he’s asking, and with that family living there, I don’t believe buyers will even look at it.
My last story is about as basic as they come – it’s about an entry-level condo in King West.
I’m working with a few investor-clients right now, all of whom want to buy a condo in the downtown core, close to cash flow neutral, with long-term appreciation potential, and low maintenance fees.
My client threw me for a loop when he told me in the New Year, “I want to keep the purchase under $500,000,” which is a number that I think will be really, really hard to achieve this year, unless you’re considering bachelor units or junior-one-bedrooms.
Low and behold, a unit came up for sale for $499,000 in prime King West – 545 square feet, with $203/month maintenance fees.  This building, FYI, has seen its fees decrease every single year since its inception, and from what I can tell, has the lowest fees per square foot in the downtown core.
Within about five minutes of entering the condo, my client said, “Let’s make an offer.”  Investors usually know right away, although to be fair, I see this a lot with end-users as well.
We submitted an offer by 9:30pm, for full-price, with a deposit.  The offer was set to expire the next day at 12pm.
I didn’t hear back from the agent until 11am the next morning, and he had some “life circumstances” that were not ideal to our situation, but to be fair, life happens, and we were forced to wait until later that evening to get a response to our offer.
Of course, by later that evening, there was a second offer, and we ended up losing.
We had come up to $510,000, but the other offer was also $510,000, albeit unconditional, and with a very quick closing.
Knowing that the listing agent had yet to order the Status Certificate, this means that the competing buyer was willing to make an offer without a condition on Status, or even a review of the status.  That’s something we saw a lot in early 2017.
I have no doubt that this was still a good buy at $510,000, but we would have likely had to offer $515,000 or more, and who knows how much we’d have to actually pay in order to beat out an unconditional offer, when our offer had a condition.
So all in all, it was a busier-than-expected week, for the first real week back.
These three situations underscore what I had predicted going into the year: entry-level freehold homes in the central core will be hot, downtown condos will be hot, and houses outside the core, as well as builder-spec-homes, will remain cold.
So far, nothing out of the ordinary in the market.
But I will say that inventory is suffering.
We saw 5,034 active listings in January of 2017, and then 11,894 in January of 2018.
Do you believe the 2019 number will be closer to 2017, or 2018?
The post The First Week Back! appeared first on Toronto Realty Blog.
Originated from http://bit.ly/2sruyzy
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astralsecrets · 6 years ago
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Nonlucids - September 18
Sep 18 2018 (from phone, apologize for quality) Color coded red, but lost. Annoying bc I really knew it. Need a better way, because I reinforced throughout the night and had it memorized, then lost 100% on waking Dim room daylight square, person on bed - needs needle in foot, diff sizes available, I argue for smaller F says just use the big one! But point is flat, not sharp! Ask pt and they say bigger one! Have to swap/refill the compartments which have screw caps like soap sponge, the smaller needs a push piece, like in a click pen, I go off to find cups to do the swap cleanly Clone troopers n beheading (starts as pixelated wii homebrew, then realistic) real uggos (SoMordor orcs) but good swordfights, blocks sort of cancelled out each other, I wasn't lucid, but was using will/intent/control to survive, some real big ones activated before end School, road, early mornish, parking lot (important, not sure why, maybe had to do w foot) Long dark hallway, I took drugs (ingested something, no smoking), halloween party, I'm gonna kill, dad, using umbrella to hide, in dark bedroom I'm forced by invisible forces, not in control of movements, (incubated? was thinking about doing drugs inside a dream last night) College, blind guy, dad, looking for printer or scanner, lights are off but BG memorized rooms and lights come on, he directs us BG inside lab w others, needs poster - long group discussion abt. honors program, girls knew L from HS who said it was serious but I told them it was nonsense King of the hill carnival, guys in corner trying me (bobby) and sister, saying we met before long ago, etc. weird simultaneous nighttime and daytime lighting, there were no clear external lights, sun or artificial
from RSSMix.com Mix ID 8297989 https://www.dreamviews.com/blogs/zad/nonlucids-september-18-85445/
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buildercar · 7 years ago
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New Post has been published on http://www.buildercar.com/one-week-with-2017-ford-shelby-gt350-mustang/
One Week With: 2017 Ford Shelby GT350 Mustang
The flat-plane crankshaft in the 2017 Ford Shelby GT350 is about as big around as, oh, Dwayne Johnson’s bicep. It’s therefore somewhat terrifying to realize that, as the tach needle swings skyward and the exhaust note is shrieking and the car is trembling and that giant crank is whirling around mere inches in front of you at 6,000 rpm, you’ve still got 2,000 rpm left to go.
You’d be forgiven for feeling the sudden urge to leap out of the driver’s seat and straight into the nearest blockhouse.
There’s nothing subtle about this Shelby rocketship. It fairly shivers with power, the exhaust snorting and ripping and bellowing even when you aren’t exploring the tachometer’s upper stratosphere. The 19-inch black-painted aluminum wheels wearing sticky Michelin Pilot Super Sport tires say “don’t tread on me” with a capital “Tread.” A new-for-2017 color, vintage-themed Grabber Blue (a friend called it “Smurf Blue”), stands out like Kim Kardashian in a library. A white racing stripe ($475) is actually named “Over The Top” on the options list. Clearly, Ford understands what it’s baked-up here.
In creating its 2017 model, Dearborn listened to potential GT350 buyers. And, basically, what they heard was “stop pussy-footing around and just give us the damn Track Pack already.” Thus, what was a $6,500 option in 2016 is standard on all 2017 models. That adds coolers for the engine oil, transmission, and Torsen rear diff; an aluminum shock-tower brace; a higher-downforce rear spoiler; and, most important of all, adaptive magnetorheological (“MagneRide”) shocks. A new Electronics Package ($3,000) adds Sync 3, voice-activated nav, and an uprated nine-speaker audio system. Also available is a new Convenience Package (not on my test car), which includes all of the above options but replaces the manual Recaro seats with power leather chairs (ummm, pass).
All-in, we’re now looking at a $60,000 Mustang. Does it deliver?
Well, there’s no denying the chops of that hulking, 526-horsepower V-8. Topping the magic 100 horses per liter without forced induction means this is one finely tuned piece of power art. The flat-plane crank, with each con-rod journal 180 degrees opposite the next in line (instead of at the usual 90-degree intervals), enables a cylinder firing order that alternates between banks — reducing exhaust pulse overlap and allowing the engine to breathe more freely and rev both quicker and higher. (That’s precisely why Ferrari uses the same crank design in the 488.)
Opened wide on an empty mountain road, the GT350’s so-called “Voodoo” V-8 is nothing short of mind-blowing. Acceleration is brutal. Fearsome. And…is there even a redline?
You could convince yourself there isn’t, because the thing just winds and winds and keeps right on winding — all the while emitting a shattering blast of exhaust that’s probably knocking nearby birds right out of the sky. It’s not your typical muscle-car roar, nor is it the finely polished shriek of an Italian exotic. It’s something in-between, unique, a potent, brassy, very American take on an upscale V-8. It’s like riding inside a tornado, if you want to know the truth. Mind you, full torque is on tap by a relatively modest 4,750 rpm, so the engine is pulling plenty hard way before redline. But, damn, there’s something indescribably delicious about winding this beast all the way to its limiter.
Wreaking such mechanical havoc almost seems sinful. After a few minutes going full-throttle at every opportunity I started to feel guilty without knowing why.
Fortunately, the GT350 can use its power unlike any Mustang before it. Especially given the added Track Pack bits, this baby is glued to the tarmac. No limp “Mustang” cornering habits here, this Shelby feels more like a BMW. There’s a ton of grip on tap, I’m guessing close to or maybe right at one-g worth. Moreover, the chassis is balanced, pushing just a bit near the limit (after all, it’s packing a lot of forward mass) but never really sliding into full understeer.
You can hustle this thing like a true sports car, the short-throw six-speed manual shifter firing off gear changes like a quick-drawn Colt, the MagneRide shocks capable of independently fine-tuning their response every ten milliseconds, the structure tight and strong, the big Michelins taking full advantage of the sophisticated platform. And when another corner comes rushing up, fear not: the brakes are freaking enormous. The front discs are 15.5 inches in diameter and clamped by six-piston Brembo calipers. Your jeans will fade before these binders do.
If the GT350 has a downside, it lies in its relentlessness. Yes, the adjustable mag-ride shocks do an impressive job of creaming the rough edges off of broken pavement, yes the Alcantara-wrapped wheel feels great in your hands, yes the clutch effort is surprisingly light considering the brute with which it’s partnered. But the Shelby is, first an foremost, an extreme car. The engine never lets you go; it’s always there and in your face and assaulting your ears. When you’re out for a romp it couldn’t be better; the snarl and noise and fury are precisely what you want. But if you’re going to commute in this thing, by the time you arrive at your destination you may need a little alone time.
The sporty Recaros are appropriately well-bolstered, but it you’re the slightest bit wide you’ll likely say “they bind.” And then there’s that bod. Let me put it this way: When you’re flaunting 19-inch black alloys, bazooka-sized quad tailpipes, and a big ol’ racing stripe, every other rat racer in town is gonna roll up alongside for a sniff — and probably a “dare ya.” I could see other drivers wondering, “Is that thing really as mean as it looks?” And usually they played cautious, not wanting to tempt humiliation. But they all swooped in close for an eyeball.
The 2017 Shelby GT350 is righteous that way. It’s got the swagger and the cojones to back it up. Along with its even-edgier GT350R sibling, it’s the first Mustang with moves across every degree of the friction circle. That is, it turns and stops every bit as good as it goes.
And, man, does it go. After I week I’m not sure I ever found that redline.
Photography courtesy of Juliette St. Antoine 
2017 Ford Shelby GT350 Mustang
ON SALE July 2017 PRICE $55,195/$59,970 (base/as-tested) ENGINE 5.2L DOHC 32-valve V-8/526 hp @ 7,500 rpm, 429 lb-ft @ 4,750 rpm TRANSMISSION 6-speed manual LAYOUT 2-door, 4-passenger, front-engine, RWD coupe EPA MILEAGE 14/21 mpg (city/hwy) L x W x H 188.9 x 75.9 x 54.2 in WHEELBASE 107.1 in WEIGHT 3,800 lb 0-60 MPH 4.1 sec (est) TOP SPEED 175 mph (est)
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rebeccahpedersen · 6 years ago
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The First Week Back!
TorontoRealtyBlog
I was in the office on January 2nd, to the surprise of nobody, especially not my wife.
I’d had just about as much “time off” as I could handle, and couldn’t wait to get back to the cozy confines of my office.  The only problem was: there are no new listings in the days after New Year’s!
January 2nd was a Wednesday, and very few, if anybody, is going to list a property for sale on January 2nd, 3rd, or 4th.
So this past week was the first true week “back” at it, and while new listings were still scarce, I was pleasantly surprised by the quality of the listings that we did see.
Don’t get me wrong, it’s not nearly enough to satisfy the demand.  But it’s more than expected, and I found myself making three offers for buyers last week, which was surprising for early-January.
I fielded some calls and emails from new prospective buyers and sellers, and by the time the week was done, I realized that the different experiences I’d had might shed some light on the current state of the market, what’s hot and cold, and where the surpluses and deficits lay.
Or, maybe it’s just five days to start the year, which means nothing.  But I can’t help but think it’s the former…
Clients of mine have been looking for a freehold home for over a year.  They came to me after working, unsuccessfully, with another agent (this happens quite a bit in our industry), and were eager to get started in 2019, as soon as listings came about.
To our collective surprise, there was a perfect new listing in their target search area which hit the market on Tuesday.  This is, keep in mind, Tuesday the eighth day of January.  Who in the world would choose to list their home only eight days into the new year?  It was strange, but welcome!
When we first discussed the home, I told my clients, who have a budget of $999,999 due to the obvious mortgage restrictions, “This is a hard-no.  It’s a great house, but even without parking and backing onto a main street, I think this is a $1,050,000 house.”
My clients were obviously disappointed, but I always tell my clients in that price range, “We have to be active in order to be successful.  We need to try to make something happen.”  And while I’m not the type of agent to run around the city making dummy offers (ie. the ones without any chance of being accepted that oh-so-many buyer-agents make), I told my buyers that I would chat with the agent.
The agent was admittedly bearish on the market, and so too were her clients.
I asked her point-blank, “Is this a high-$900’s house, in your opinion?” and she said, “Absolutely, my clients are reasonable.”
I further asked her, “Would they be interested in a bully offer?” and before I could finish the sentence, she was already telling me that, indeed, they would be.
She questioned the timing of the listing, and the condition of the market.  She told me her clients were reasonable people, and they didn’t have any illusions of grandeur.
So we put together an offer for $999,000, obtained a bank draft for a deposit, and submitted the offer at 2:00pm with an 8:00pm irrevocable.  The timing is always tough with bully offers; you don’t want to give the seller too much time, ie. 11:59pm in this case, as we would fear the door to other offers coming in is left far too wide, but you also can’t shove it down their throat by giving them an hour to decide.  The house, by the way, was listed at $874,990.
At about 3:30pm, the agent called me to say, “They’re going to work with the offer,” which in bully-offer terminology basically means, “We are going to forego our scheduled next-Wednesday offer night, and accept your offer, provided another offer doesn’t come in and beat it.”
The last part of that sentence is never said, but inferred.
If the seller decides to “work with” the offer, it means that they’re now going to get the ball rolling, so to speak, and call all the other agents who have shown the property to let them know that there is a bully offer, and it will be presented that evening.
As an aside, were are still seeing a handful of listings that specify, “Seller Reserves The Right To Consider Pre-Emptive Offers Without Notice,” which is illegal, and was a problem back in the spring of 2017, but those agents are mostly discount brokerages and fly-by-nighters that you’d expect this behaviour from.
In any event, my clients and I waited on pins and needles to see if our offer would have legs.
The first step was now complete: we had convinced the seller to move up their offer review day, and convinced them to work with our offer, which was well below what we thought was fair market value for the home, but the sellers seemed to think the price was fantastic!  Now we had to hope that we would catch the market sleeping, and that other buyers wouldn’t materialize, and wouldn’t be able to get their act together to draft an offer and procure a bank draft within 3-4 hours.
As is always almost the case, however, two more offers were submitted by 6:30pm.
And when I called the agent at 7:00pm, I could hear it in her voice.  You just know by the way they pick up the phone.
Along with our bully offer, there were four more offers in the end.
And by 8:00pm, the property had sold firm for, wait for it……..$1,050,000.
Hmmmmmm….silver lining?  That I pegged the price?
Do we take any solace in the “efficient market,” in that this house sold for what it was worth?
Irrespective of my clients’ situation, I suppose.  But the entire point of this excursion was to try to catch the market off-guard in early January, and yet the market countered our offense with brilliant defence, and the house sold for what it should have.
What does it say about the market that only one week into the year, a house is selling for 20% over list, with five offers on a bully attempt?  What does it say about the market that four other buyers came to the offer table, within three hours of a bully offer being submitted, all in the first damn week of January?
It tells me that the market is resilient, at least in this price point.
Later in the week, I was called in to price a Scarborough home which I noted had been languishing on the market for the better part of two years.
This house was listed for sale in March of 2017 at a price that, even then, seemed really high, and then sat on the market through the spring and summer.
It was a beautiful house, but a new-build in an area that was full of new builds, and while the getting wasn’t just good, but rather great in 2016 and into 2017 for builders, things really cooled off in April of 2017.
The house was eventually rented out in the fall of 2017, and that lease expired by the end of 2018.  The tenants are now on a month-to-month lease.
I met with the seller at his home, and we weren’t alone.  A family of six was present in the house, although it felt as if a family of at least twelve lived there, based on all the stuff.  Call me a minimalist, that’s fine.  I’m O.C.D. and I like things a certain way, not to mention I hate clutter.  But I’m being fair with respect to this home when I say it was a……hmmm…….what would I call it….
…..rat’s nest?
That’s harsh.  But I don’t care.
This house was a rat’s nest.  It was God-awful.  I simply cold not believe what tenants had done to this house in such a short amount of time.
And yet the photos of this house from when it was up for sale in 2017 show a gorgeous renovation, with gleaming, never-used-before features, in a never-lived-in house.
I found it to be very odd to present my market analysis to the owner in front of the tenants, but the owner didn’t seem to mind, and the tenants (the father, at least) was extremely curious.
I went through my evaluation with the seller, and I could tell by his body language that he didn’t like what I had to show him.
This house was on the market for $1,299,900 in March of 2017 when it was probably “worth” $1,200,000 and yet it still could have sold for that ridiculous price, only because everything was selling back then.  By the time July rolled around, he’d have been lucky to get $1,150,000 for it, and perhaps I’m just being generous here, and feeling his pain.
I compared his home to every single new-build that had sold in the past 24 months, making adjustments for every conceivable feature: bedrooms, bathrooms, square footage, garage and/or parking situation, lot frontage, lot depth, location, features/finishes, school district, proximity to transit, etc.
I used four different metrics for the time adjustment:
1) GTA average home price 2) 416 average home price 3) 416 average detached home price 4) Scarborough average detached home price
I showed him what his home would be worth with all the adjustments, and then each of the adjustments for time shown above.  Then I showed him what it would be worth with an average of those four, just for good measure.
In the end, I felt that the 416 average detached home price metric made the most sense, since there weren’t enough sales in Scarborough to avoid a sample size error.
I concluded that his home was worth $1,100,000, but we could try listing for $1,169,000 for a short period to see if we have any bites, and perhaps let buyers feel that they’re getting a “deal” if we dropped the price by $50,000, either in a negotiation, or via revised listing after 30-45 days.  This listing, I told him, would be a long, drawn out process due to the current market conditions for this home in this area.
With his arms across his chest, he said, “I wouldn’t sell for less than $1.4 Million.”
What would be going through your mind, if you were in my position?
I was just floored.  Absolutely gobsmacked.
“Do you think that your house is worth $1.4 Million?” I asked, “Or do you mean that you wouldn’t sell for less than $1.4 Million?”
“What does it matter?” he asked me.
I explained that it matters because I would love to wave a $20 bill around in the parking lot at Best Buy, offering to part with it for $25, but I didn’t think I would have any success.  I explained that “wants” and “needs” are two different things, and there is zero correlation.
“I want $1.4 Million for my house,” he told me, “And if you want my listing, you’ll get me my price,” he explained.
I told him in as respectful a way as possible that I didn’t want his listing at $1.4 Million, and that nobody would get him his price.  Further, any agent that did want his listing at $1.4 Million should represent an immediate red flag in his field of vision.
I knew this wasn’t going anywhere, so I asked him, “Just to confirm – this house will be vacant when it’s for sale, correct?”
He presented a bit of a cocky smile, as I think that by this point, he didn’t like me, and he said, “Now why would I do that?”
This was tough, given the tenant was sitting right next to me, but I believe in this business, truth trumps feelings, so I said, “This house shows poorly.  Very poorly.  When I list properties for sale, I recommend that they are vacated, cleaned, painted, staged, and marketed.”
“Let me tell you something about the math,” he responded, as I literally began writing this blog post in my head.  “I’m getting $3,000 per month in rent for this house.  I can’t afford to have it sit vacant for two months while you rearrange the furniture, then have it sit for another five or six.”
Playing on his theme, I said, “My math tells me that eight months represents a paltry $24,000 in lost revenue, and yet you’re about $300,000 high on the price of the home.”
He went on to explain that every month he had the tenant in the house, he lost $5,000.  He was leveraged up the you-know-what on this project, and had a construction loan to boot.  He had apparently lost $75,000 by holding this home for 15 months, which is why he figured he could simply add that number to his original ask of $1,299,900, and then round up for good measure.
I left on cordial terms, asked him to keep my evaluation, and encouraged him to look it over with whichever agent he hires to list the property.  I told him that a small loss is better than a large loss, and that it might make sense to cut the cord.  I explained that not every builder/flipper/renovator makes money on the first go-around, and that in the long run, he would look back at this a small bump on the road.  I felt like his mother, trying to put a positive spin on getting beat up at school; something like, “They pick on you because they’re jealous of you!”  But in the end, I could tell my words were falling on deaf ears.
That home will never sell for anything close to what he’s asking, and with that family living there, I don’t believe buyers will even look at it.
My last story is about as basic as they come – it’s about an entry-level condo in King West.
I’m working with a few investor-clients right now, all of whom want to buy a condo in the downtown core, close to cash flow neutral, with long-term appreciation potential, and low maintenance fees.
My client threw me for a loop when he told me in the New Year, “I want to keep the purchase under $500,000,” which is a number that I think will be really, really hard to achieve this year, unless you’re considering bachelor units or junior-one-bedrooms.
Low and behold, a unit came up for sale for $499,000 in prime King West – 545 square feet, with $203/month maintenance fees.  This building, FYI, has seen its fees decrease every single year since its inception, and from what I can tell, has the lowest fees per square foot in the downtown core.
Within about five minutes of entering the condo, my client said, “Let’s make an offer.”  Investors usually know right away, although to be fair, I see this a lot with end-users as well.
We submitted an offer by 9:30pm, for full-price, with a deposit.  The offer was set to expire the next day at 12pm.
I didn’t hear back from the agent until 11am the next morning, and he had some “life circumstances” that were not ideal to our situation, but to be fair, life happens, and we were forced to wait until later that evening to get a response to our offer.
Of course, by later that evening, there was a second offer, and we ended up losing.
We had come up to $510,000, but the other offer was also $510,000, albeit unconditional, and with a very quick closing.
Knowing that the listing agent had yet to order the Status Certificate, this means that the competing buyer was willing to make an offer without a condition on Status, or even a review of the status.  That’s something we saw a lot in early 2017.
I have no doubt that this was still a good buy at $510,000, but we would have likely had to offer $515,000 or more, and who knows how much we’d have to actually pay in order to beat out an unconditional offer, when our offer had a condition.
So all in all, it was a busier-than-expected week, for the first real week back.
These three situations underscore what I had predicted going into the year: entry-level freehold homes in the central core will be hot, downtown condos will be hot, and houses outside the core, as well as builder-spec-homes, will remain cold.
So far, nothing out of the ordinary in the market.
But I will say that inventory is suffering.
We saw 5,034 active listings in January of 2017, and then 11,894 in January of 2018.
Do you believe the 2019 number will be closer to 2017, or 2018?
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