#opp:eli gray

[beware-of-doors-rp]

eli gray ♔ aesthetic

“after all, in this world of humans, he was little better than a monster, and what did a monster have to be afraid of in the dark?”  - darren shan

rebel ✗ addict ✗ rockstar ✗ survivor ✗ asshole ✗ runaway ✗ fighter ✗ east coaster ✗ loner ✗ monster

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Happy birthday to one of my favorite people in the history of the world!!! I love you so much and hope you have an incredible birthday!

@ventimigrillo @mitchellwrites

[beware-of-doors-rp]

hello love, for you i have so many words but i forget where we were

@deathbymitchell

@ventimigrillo

[beware-of-doors-rp]

[thiskidsnotalright] + an eli gray fanmix for @deathbymitchell​

pt. 1

centuries - fall out boy || bullet with butterfly wings - smashing pumpkins || bottle of pain - combichrist || the devil takes care of his own - band of skulls || head like a hole - nine inch nails || panic switch - silversun pickups || sinister kid - the black keys || momma sed - puscifer || david - noah gundersen || please, please, please, let me get what i want - the smiths || my own worst enemy - lit || underdog - kasabian || the arsonist - puscifer || mountain song - jane’s addiction || paranoid android - radiohead || kingdom of welcome addiction - iamx || too late for gods - afi || rooster - alice in chains

pt. 2

lazarus - david bowie || broken crown - mumford & sons || the way - zack hemsey || hustler - josef salvat || dangerous man - little dume || bad moon rising (cover) [feat. peter dreimanis] - mourning ritual || blood on my name - the brothers bright || death of seasons - afi || the remedy - puscifer || looking at the invisible man - the dead weather || kill your heroes - awolnation || salt of the earth - lovedrug || battle cry - imagine dragons || prayers for rain - the cure || you’ll not feel the drowning (the decemberists cover) - horizon || keep the streets empty for me - fever ray || short change hero - the heavy || thiskidsnotalright - awolnation || the sound of silence - disturbed

[beware-of-doors-rp]

change nothing Ω Grayhall high school sweethearts AU playlist

i forget where we were - ben howard || let her go - jasmine thompson || already gone - sleeping at last || rootless tree (live) - damien rice || we won’t - jaymes young & phoebe ryan || jet pack blues - fall out boy || neptune - sleeping at last || caves - haux || words - birdy || house on fire - sia || talk - kodaline || change nothing - i nine

happy birthday marie, my favorite trash queen for life!!! @ventimigrillo​ @deathbymitchell​

[beware-of-doors-rp]

“My tongue is a weapon.”

Eli & Charlie

Frequently, her tongue is sharp, but Eli’s never complained before. Even when they’re screaming at each other, putting holes in the walls of the home they’ve constructed with wrecking ball words. But the damage isn’t important, not when there’s very few times phrases like ‘forgive’ have passed from their lips. Those sentences are temporary, band-aids stretched over gaping wounds only to be ripped off for added pain when the time comes to resurface past scars.

But refurbishing is still an important step, easier to cover the blisters of verbal war with fingertips pressed at the back of his neck to drag his lips against hers, silencing anything else that shakes their foundation. Forgiveness comes in the quiet gasps he steals from her lungs or the gentle caress of her fingers when he puts his head in her lap and grips at her thighs as though he’s writing apologies along her flesh.

They don’t need those words; they never have.

Sharp as a dagger with angry words, or pressed against the back of his neck to taste the salt from his skin, her tongue has many uses for his undoing and it’s the only weapon that takes down a monster like Eli Gray.

[beware-of-doors-rp]

"If you say this makes you happy then I’m not the only one lying."

Eli & Charlie

The early mornings are the only times for true honesty. When the sun is just beginning to peak through the blinds, casting designs on the carpet like long lines of cocaine and she wonders if Eli ever did that. If it wasn’t an immediate jump to heroin, but an experimentation with other substances, like stepping stones to a grave. Maybe they’ve pulled him back. Maybe he wouldn’t use anymore. And if she ever prayed, it would be the only request upon her lips.

Charlie could tell him that. That she hopes he stays clean. That isn’t a topic off limits. It never would be with him. He’d always be an addict. Just a recovering one.

But there are other things she couldn’t tell him, words they had promised would never pass between them and it’s hard not to feel all of it now as her hair rustles against the pillow when she turns to look at him, still sleeping, lost in some distant dream, although she thinks he might be a light sleeper. He’s usually up before she is.

The sheet clings to his waist, the Vegas heat too humid to allow for a blanket and the lack of clothing more from the heat of him pressing her against the wall than the promise of summer. His impossibly dark hair still sits in a disarray from her eager fingers and shifting in his sleep. She bites her lip in the hopes she’d still her hand from brushing strands away from his eyes. That’s a line she can’t cross, a boundary keeping her caged from him. Eli could have every physical piece of her she offers up like sacrifice. But there’s a heart locked away and a soul she’s too selfish with.

And there’s a logical side of her brain that says she’s already chipped pieces of each away and handed over.

She thinks that it sucks, that she hates every time she looks at him her heart begins to beat just a little bit faster. The rules had been set as a precaution, to protect her as well as him. But what good are they if they don’t work?

Charlie slides delicately over to Eli, molding herself against his side and resting her cheek against his chest, nose nestling into the curve of his neck where she can breath deeply until she’s suffocated by him. But if she freezes in something like fear when he moves, she also smiles. Because his arm wraps around her back and presses her frame against him. And his head tips towards her, settling in against her hair. She hates that her heat stutters at the thought that his body is perfectly in tune with her own. That strings tie them together, to react whenever the other one is pulled.

This isn’t happiness. It’s far from it. But falling for someone, without control over it, is rarely ever happy.

[beware-of-doors-rp]

"I’m in love with my own sins."

Eli & Charlie

The church is cold and hollow as Charlie sits in a pew still standing amidst the wreckage. Sun beams trickle through the cracks in the ceiling and lingering dust motes waltz together in a deadly descent to the cracked tiles of the floor. This building used to be a place of worship before it harbored fugitives, ones betrayed by the government meant to protect them just because their DNA examined differently.

She’d been in the Bureau’s facilities, of her own volition, and she’d known how their captives had been treated. The dank cells, the clever ways they found to rip answers from their prisoners’ throats. She’d been forced into the rooms of dangerous mutants, made to touch them, mimic their abilities. If it had helped her learn to control her own, it’s still difficult to view it that way. Just that it had been her fault and she hadn’t deserved such a rescue mission.

There’s still some lingering guilt for that, that Eli, Jay, Jane, they had all risked their lives to break her out. One of them’s dead now. The other she hadn’t seen in years. And the man crucified on the cross dangling from the ceiling before her stares at her with remorseful eyes. Like one of his children had turned out so wrong, and she couldn’t precisely recall his story to know exactly what she’s supposed to be to that man. Only that her mother dragged her children to Sunday Mass so they could find various ways to cover their quick naps.

But of all the things she’s done, the blood on her hands and the comrades she’s seen fallen, she thinks the man frozen in his death is accusing her of one thing and that’s Eli Gray. Perhaps he is the man her mother warned her about, the temptation that draws all smart-mouthed girls in with thoughts of taming some beast. But she had never believed she could tame him. Why collar something so vicious? He would gnaw through his chains until his gums bled.

She’s not sorry for him, for the violent way she’s loved him, with nails etching her name down his back and throat bared like he could rip it out if he so chose. And she’d let him. She’s washed blood from the callouses of his palms more times than she can count, and he’s done the same for her now, his companion something deadly and beastly now. He’d been right all along, no matter how hard she fought him on it. But the piles of bodies add up and there’s too many names she knows on memorial walls. They all had to be radical now to survive.

That statue could accuse her all he wants. He’s just a vacant shell, a being that never held life like her body does. Charlie never believed in him anyway. She could not trust what she could not see, some god meant to grant her redemption or salvation. Her trust is in Eli alone, the only being she’ll offer prayers and penance to. The greatest sin of all and she’d rather burn beside him than sprout white feathered wings. She’s a sacrifice on his alter, a pilgrim trudging through the mire to kneel before his shrine. Her faith is in him alone, for he’s the only one she could ever truly believe in.

Charlie senses her god before she sees him, a swirl of shadows forming that Eli steps through with the deadly grace of a predator. It leaves her still, lacking the fear that would force her to stand and arm herself with whatever ability is her most destructive now.

Eli stands beside her, the back of his knuckles trailing affectionately across her cheekbone in some silent greeting before he tips his head towards the door, a quiet ‘c’mon’ like a whisper clinging to the dancing dust in the hair. Charlie obeys him, like any devoted sinner would, standing to slide out of the musty pew. Her hand reaches for his instinctively, fingers sliding through his own to find there are no holes in his palm. He’d never allow himself to be strung up like bait.

[beware-of-doors-rp]

"Let me kiss it better."

Eli & Charlie

“Get away from me,” Charlie demanded as harshly as she could manage, in sharp contrast with the wide smile exposing her teeth. But Eli still edged forward, devious smirk tugging the corner of his lips into something crooked and untrustworthy. There’s a glint in his eye that warns her kissing the fresh paper cut on her finger is the last thing he plans on doing and there’s a long list of things she believes would take it’s place. Tickling her is pretty high up there.

Still Eli moves for her and the take-out menu, once a weapon against her flesh, become a shield to spare her from whatever tactics he had up his sleeve. It’s impossible to run when the couch swallows her, the arm of the chair pillowing her back uncomfortable as she sinks against it, long legs curling under her to shrink away from the obnoxious smacking of Eli’s lips.

He repeats his offer, swears it’ll help. But he does little to smother his cocky grin and it only has her laughing. “No, get away. I don’t trust you,” she informs him honestly, because right now, she knows better than to let him have his way. “You’re gonna tickle me or lick me. And then I’ll just bleed to death and all because you didn’t attend to my wound.”

The laughter that escapes him is a bit much, she thinks childishly, a small pout on her lips that she tries to hide behind the menu. “C’mon, I just want pizza,” she whines, but Eli’s already tearing the menu out of her hands and assaulting her ribs with nimble fingers. And she swears to herself then that she’ll never leave him alone all morning because he’s already gone stir crazy.

[beware-of-doors-rp]

"Please, just trust me, just this once."

Charlie & Eli

"You won’t understand," Charlie tells the answering machine, still grateful that Eli hadn’t picked up his cell phone. Why he hadn’t doesn’t matter. The two of them had never been much for phone conversation, and she’s thankful for that too. They’ve never been at a loss for conversation, but some late night sharing while she lounges in her bed feels too much like the relationship they had both been so adamant about.

Despite it, she’ll miss him. “I just, I have to do this” she clarifies, rubbing fingers over her eyes because they’re rimmed red with irritation from trying to hold back a flood for too long. Even if she had made up her mind, the fear hadn’t been entirely erased.

"I’m not like you. Or Jay. I’m just-" Charlie sighs in frustration, always a difficulty in putting how she feels into words. If her mouth is never one to shut, she’d never been able to find the precise words to describe her feelings. Perhaps it’s why she resorts to humor, a dry sarcastic tone easier to spout out than anything sincere. The sincerity comes with her silence, the keen listener she becomes when there’s a friend in need. But it’s too troublesome to rely on others the same way.

The key to her apartment clatters quietly against the kitchen counter as she leaves it there for her roommate, Lisa. “I can’t control this. Don’t think I’m going to an-and after that little boy, I know-” she stops, voice cracking as she begins to break, steel wall rusting and crumbling beneath the weight of freedom thrown away like garbage. Sporadic, hot tears sneak past her barrier, sliding down her cheeks and she’s eager to wipe them away even if there’s no one in the room to see.

"I’m sorry," she manages through the breaking of her voice, apologies never simple between them when they’re both too stubborn to admit they were wrong. "You’re just- you’re better at this," she says upon an exhausted sigh, palm holding her forehead like her neck can’t handle the weight and if she stands here any longer she won’t be able to walk out the door, "Something’s wrong with me. I-I’m just too dangerous. That kid. I mean, after what I did…"

Her jaw hangs open, mere noises crackling in the back of her throat as words fail her. Charlie pushes red hair away from her face, skin blotchy with fits of tears she’s been trying to hold back. She’s a coward and she knows it, lacking the bravery to refine her ability until she manages to control it. But it feels like it’s always morphing, evolving into something wild and beastly when she thinks she’s trapped it firmly in a cage. And if living a life of solitude had been her first option, that little casket buried in the large graveyard solidified her own fate as well.

"This is the right thing to do," Charlie states with an affirmative nod of her head the cell phone couldn’t record. But it can capture the weakness in her tone, the tears that constrict her throat until it aches. And if she keeps telling herself she’s making the right decision maybe it’ll start to feel like one. "Just didn’t want you to think I wasn’t answering your texts cause I hate you or something," she attempts to joke, but it’s a missile that never lands. She’s already too torn open. And the statement couldn’t be further from the truth. Eli’s too important to her and there’s no way he could believe she hates him.

There is not a smile upon her lips or laughter in her voice. This message might be the only way Eli remembers her, but there’s the self-deprecating thought that he wouldn’t recall her face at all after this. “Maybe it won’t be so bad,” she offers with a shrug of her shoulders, also something the machine wouldn’t record, “Maybe they’ll just keep me somewhere safe, find a way to cure me or something. I don’t know.”

Charlie pulls the door open, gazing out into the empty hallway and despite her words she thinks she can hear ‘dead man walking’ echoing in her head. This is the last time she’ll speak to Eli, and they aren’t even talking. “I’m just…sorry. I thought you deserved an explanation, ‘cause you’ve just really helped me out. And I’m, uh, I’m gonna miss you. A lot.”

There’s a pause from her then, the moment she takes to close the door behind her and catch her breath. “Really gonna miss you, Eli,” Charlie confesses with a soft smile, sniffling back the rest of her tears before she pulls the iPhone away from her face, droplets of her own sadness evidence upon it. She hits the button to end the call before starting down the steps with the thought she should’ve done that in person.

[beware-of-doors-rp]

"I can’t keep hurting you."

Charlie & Eli

It’s an excuse.

It’s always an excuse with Eli when he’s curled up on the floor, fingers scratching at newly bubbling sores on his arm. How he finds another vein to tap, like he’s hunting for oil in the desert, she’ll never know. But he’s greedy, just like those billionaire tycoons, when he bleeds black down his arm, shoves technology into his skin and presses in his vice.

He’ll use any words to make Charlie give in, she knows this. Promises that he’ll quit after just one more dose, screams to make her leave him be, guilt to deter her from his side. But there’s too much loyalty to him, especially now. Too much that keeps her sitting on the floor beside him as he hurls insults at her, enough reasons to be angry whenever he slips up, and more reasons as to why she should forgive him and stay.

But there’s the constant fear she isn’t cut out for this, that she’s hurting him just as much as he is her. She’s too volatile, temper too quick to be able to handle a downward spiral like Eli’s. Patience, understanding, these are all traits he needs in a friend to keep him afloat, and she lacks those some days. Perhaps he’ll continue to relapse, continue to ache if she sticks around. Sometimes, the line is just too blurred between who is hurting who.

Instead, Charlie crouches down in front of him, delicate fingers wrapping around his wrist as though she’s terrified to crush him into dust. She pulls his hand away from etching out a painful reminder upon his skin, a quiet understanding that this loyalty is based upon this trade off, the help and comfort he’s provided her when her DNA rebelled.

Gently, she wraps her arms around him, pulling him against her chest and holding him there as though just her limbs could keep him together. But today, she isn’t sure who is holding who.