#op i luv luv ur songs!!!
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@secretlyafiveheadeddragon @choccochocco @cipherinator @lalilacana @gender-roles-can-suck-my-dick @swooshywoo @abot-tom-lol @w1n3bunny @panoramaaa @boredoricorio @ohmytitan
When you get this, list 5 songs you like to listen to, publish them, and send this ask to the last 10 people in your notifs 💖
Okay!
@coswinx @pennyroyald @bella-but-not-hadid444 @manicali @steph-schuyler @coswinx @lillianemerald @thatonestarkid
@orchid-merryweather, and you @bestfriendshipdynami lmao
#thanks 4 the tag <3#op i luv luv ur songs!!!#chappel roan is bae and so is olivia#hope ur ok has been making me cry recently lmao#Spotify
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HELLO OMIGOSH I FOUND UR WORK IN PINTREST AND I NEED TO READ THE FULL THING. CAN U TELL ME WHAT THE TITLE IS 😇😇
https://pin.it/3gvjL81Qe HERES THE LINK TO THE PIN; OR THE PICTURE INSTEAD. THANK YOU OP🩷🩷
hii!! :’3
the fic’s called “into my flesh” (title from simon curtis’ song ‘flesh’). while that snippet may look, uh, fluff pls do be warned that the whole fic is a smut fic. there’s a short lead up, but the bulk is just them fucking :D
it’s genuinely so, so heartwarming to know u came from pinterest to here to read my fic 🥹🫶🏼 happy reading luv n take care <33
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It's time ...to play truth ...or ..lie ..and it's gonna be ✨️.....Russian roulette 🩷🤪
But that thank you for the tag my luvies: @marthawrites 🥺🩷🩷
◇ Nickname: CONSUI / CONNORSUI : ight so I got this Nickname when I was a pre-teen? (11-12) when I finally started playing Call Of Duty: Black Ops 1 Zombies-- I used to play this constantly with other family members and the number one thing I would do all the time was place ...C-4's ...eveeeerryywherreeee...by the door? ...C-4 ...by the window ...C-4 ...by the hallway? ..C-4 💀💀 and someone ended up finding out that the long name for C-4 was: Compo so I roll with the name Compo for a good awhile until my friends decided it was better for it be shorter ...
Making it CONSUI instead 😭
◇ Sign: ...Aries ...I don't even know if I act like my sign 💀
◇ Height: 5'3 ...the most basic npc out there 🩷
◇ The last thing I googled: I AINT GONNA LIE ...I FUCKING GOOGLED "SIMON X READER" FOR AO3 💀💀💀...I'm ovulating
◇ Amount of sleep: this might be bad for my little health ...but I literally sleep from 2am-9am ..so that's what? ..7hrs? ...I'm running on redbulls and dry scoops of protein powder 🧍♀️
◇ Dream Job: Aerospace Enginner ...ur girl like building stuff 💅🏻
◇ Favorite Song: yall ever heard of Eat Your Young By Hozier? ...nah ...plz do its a fucking vibe 😭
Movie/ Book that summarizes me: ight lowkey idk what kind of movie or book will summarize ...ME AS A PERSON ...but yall ever seen the show "Shameless" ?? ..it has 11 seasons ..and it describes exactly what you think "shameless" means ....that's me 💀💀
◇Favorite instrument: Violin/ Piano / Chello/ Trumpet / Flute ....I played the last one in middle school ...I fucking hated it ..every bit of my existence ...that middle school music teacher was treating the class like it was sum top ivy league shit ...
◇ Aesthetic: clothing wise I'm very tech casual and like dressing in very cool modernized tones with a baggy essence -- the only time you gonna catch my ass wearing tight clothes are in formal settings 🩷
◇ Favorite Authors: literally anybody ...I ain't picky
◇ random fact about me: ....I love galaxies (anything astronomy related) ...it's habit ...an obsession ...that if the galaxy was a person I would be a stalker 🧍♀️
(no pressure tags I still luv you) @dornebloodlines @chompchompluke @aemonddtargaryen @sapphire-writes
and anyone else that wanna go ahead !
Get to know me game!
Thank you for the tags @aemondsbabe and @adragonprinceswhore ♥
Nickname: As an adult I don't really have one! When I was a kid my family called me "Marti" and my brothers called me "sister"
Sign: Libra
Height: 5'6"
The last thing I googled: "Spotify". Had to renew my premium sub! Fucks off ads!!
Amount of sleep: Usually around 8. Sometimes a little more and sometimes a looooot less
Dream job: My dream job is to literally not work
Favorite song: Ahhhh this is such a hard question! I'll just go with my #1 song from spotify wrapped which was "Vacation" by Dirty Heads
Movie/Book that Summarises Me: Apparently I'm drawing a blank because I literally cannot think of anything LOL
Favorite instrument: Piano and violin
Aesthetic: Probably best described as casual. Jeans, t-shirts, flannels, hoodies, dresses. I don't like my clothes very tight. I defs prefer to be comfortable more than anything!
Favorite authors: Stephen King, specifically his older books
Random fun fact: Thank god I'm alive in our modern day and age because if I wasn't my blind ass would have been DEAD a long time ago! I'm a glasses girl. Contacts freak me out. VERY near sighted hahaha
(no pressure) Tagging: @aemonds-fire @boundlessfantasy @theold-ultraviolence @dornebloodlines @connorsui and anyone else who would like to do it!
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OMG HAPPY 2OO LUV!! ILYSM, AND YOU DEFINITELY DESERVE MORE!! AS EXPECTED I'M HERE FOR THE MATCHUP EVENT AND I'M SO SORRY FOR BEING LATE KSDJFHSDF
1 | name : amie 2 | pronouns : s/her 3 | preferred gender : doesn't really matter 4 | self-description :
— it's ya clown sho <3 anyway, i'm an ambivert but more inclined towards the introvert side. my MBTI is INFJ and i'm a Gemini. i'd describe myself as someone who's very observant? yea, i guess. i'm awkward and you know it. My favorite color is blue, specifically sapphire, but i love all pastel colors. My fav show is Chicago Medical and all the psychological and crime thrillers out there are my favorite ( silent patient is my #1 though ) I love painting, playing piano and basketball!
— what i look in a partner you ask, uh, someone who can tolerate my silence. there are times when i go quiet for a whole day, i'll barely speak, no interaction nothing. i want someone who'd not exactly 'deal with it' but 'understand it.' also, i want someone who i can talk to without any hesitation. i have a hard time opening up so i don't do it but when i do, i spill almost everything. i might cry, might have anxiety attack, i might even shout. i know it's not very healthy but i want someone who can help me with those. plus someone who i can read with please <3 cheating and not having any respect for personal space would be the major deal breaker for me
5 | gen. aesthetic : my fashion sense starts from sweats and ends in sweats. i'm a big fan of those oversized hoodies and shirts, like something really comfy. however, i do have a collection of formal wears like blazers and dress.
6 | color/s to describe myself : red, actually. if not read then blue. it switchers but red 90% of the times.
7 | fav song/s : literally everything by Chase Atlantic and The Neighborhood. However, my absolute favorites are some of the famous classical pieces like Experience by Ludovico Einaudi and Chopin's Ballade No. 1 Op 23.
8 | fav genre of music : classical music ( Beethoven, Einaudi and Chopin own my heart )
Lol this is very lengthy I'm sorry, btw congrats again!
I looked into MBTI, I looked into zodiacs, I went off of what you said
Here he is, the man, Seijoh’s do-it-all guy
HANAMAKI TAKAHIRO ur new boyfriend
There is not enough content for him, anyway
How You Met
Bear with me here
Think about this
Artist!hanamaki
You love painting? Art club.
Idk if youre actually in any art club but shhh
Anyway, it was probably some sort of community thing full of tons of different age artists (bc you’d have basketball or something after school and he had volleyball)
So like once a week on thursday afternoons everyone gets together and does all sorts of artsy stuff
Everyone listens to lo fi music (or you can bring headphones) and chit chat and just paint for a couple hours
Its in the back section of a library (bc the library near me does stuff like this its awesome) so if you want you can go read a book while you wait for things to dry
One day the person that ran it suggested you talked to the new guy
He was about your age, it was his first day, they didn't know what all he was good at, and tbh they thought you two would look cute together
Just the vibes yk
So you set up your canvas and stuff next to him and introduced yourself
And you guys just vibe to the playlist
He’s REALLY good
Compliments you a lot too
Which is fun because he’s cute so it makes you a little flustered
You find out you guys go to the same school and he’s on the VB team
And says he has a (practice) game that weekend and asks you to come if you can
Which you do
And they win! So its fun!
Matsukawa basically asks you out for him though
He’s heard all about you already
“You don't get it issei! She’s so pretty!! God, she touched my hand and I thought I was gonna die!!!!!” “the enthusiasm is new for you” “shut up asshole” (conversation from the night before)
So he walks up to you after the game and is like “Hey so,,, we’re going out to get some lunch, you wanna come?”
Makki thinks HES flirting with you and is pissed off about it
Until you all sit down for lunch and oh, the only open spot for him is next to you (since when is matsukawa willing to sit between iwaizumi and oikawa??)
He asked you out after art club that week (Mattsun threatened not to give him any more monster for the rest of the month if he didn't get the guts to do it)
General Headcanons
You date hanamaki, you're also dating matsukawa
There’s no separating them (good thing ur MBTIs work together too, especially for strong friendships)
This was literally my first thought
So
Good luck with both these trolls
More on that later
Of course he’s going to be worried if you go radio silent for a while, but he'll understand
There are some days he’s not gonna wanna talk either
He’s really supportive on your bad days of course
Expect a random text in the middle of the evening from him
“Hiya sweetheart, just wanted to remind you that you’re beautiful, I love you, and I hope your day is going well.”
When he’s having a bad day, the same thing is all he needs from you to keep moving
He’s a really honest person. If you want to talk to him, be prepared not to get any sugar coating. If you tell him to shut up because you don’t want advice, he will. But if you expect advice from him, expect brutally honest advice. Subtlety is not his strong suit, so when it comes to advice, he’s going to tell it like it is. He's just trying to help, yknow?
However, he’s pretty good with people, so will know how to comfort you when something is bothering you. Tea and cuddles? Gotcha. Dancing at 11pm because neither of you want to sleep yet? On it. You want him to hold you? Perfect.
He’s not like...the most touchy person? There are some things he’s really indifferent on, and other things he’s stubborn as hell with. Whatever you wanna do, though
His weakness though
⚠️this part is slightly little bit suggestive⚠️
He will randomly walk up to you and pull you against him, give you a really deep kiss, smirk and walk away like nothing happened
Like hands in hair probably almost making out and then just
Walk away
Because that’s how he kisses and it’s breathtaking every time
It’s either little temple kisses or forehead or cheek pecks or something
Or that
And probably leaves you flustered and it’s funny (to him) (and to me if I was there with you) (bc that would be funny)
Hmm I’m thinking
I’m thinking hair dye dates
He needs help doing his hair from time to time Y’know (he doesn’t he just likes spending time with you) and he wants to make it pink again
So he teaches you how to do his hair and even offers to dye yours one day
Either just a strand or the ends or everything, up to you
Imagine having twinning hair dye with makki isn’t that cute
I think it’s cute
I said ur platonically dating mattsun right
Yes you are now
He absolutely adores you and loves how much makki loves you
Probably would have asked you out if makki didn’t but he was really pushing for makki to because he was just all over you in the beginning
He wasn’t overly attached to you romantically so being friends? Perfect. Sounds great
You two get along wonderfully though like you act like siblings once you warm up to each other
Again, very brutally honest person, but a little more awkward so doesn’t know what he’s saying might come off as he’s acting like a dick
He doesn’t try to though and he does really care about you
Flat out told makki if he breaks up with you and breaks your heart he’s gonna kick his ass (makki doesn’t know he had the same (less aggressive) conversation with you)
Tbh all of the VBC at seijoh loves you
Oikawa loves talking to you he thinks you’re great for makki
Gets you in on he and makki and mattsun’s antics
Iwa thinks you’re good too he just doesn’t know you as well
I think that kunimi would like you (he was almost a runner up--)
Kindaichi too
The first years just think you’re cool even if they won’t say it out loud
Seijoh VBC loves you
You got mattsun’s approval
And hanamaki loves you with literally everything in his life
So
You’re pretty set with your strawberry baby huh
Date Night!
SLEEPOVERS
I was waiting for some matchup to come along that gave me sleepover vibes
In a perfect world where you could do sleepovers with your bf because most parents would,,,not let that happen
Imagine…
He shows up at like 7:00 after practice, pizza in hand because he picked up dinner
You two eat, chat about your day, he probably scarfs down half the pie bc it’s after practice ofc he’s hungry
So when you guys are done eating you head up to your room
And make pillow fort
It’s mandatory
Different design every time, but there’s a pillow fort nonetheless
And then when there’s just enough room for the both of you to climb in
You get a blanket and a couple pillows and one of your phones or laptops or whatever and watch a movie and cuddle
When the movie is over you guys break out the face masks
You ever wonder why he has such great skin? It’s thanks to you (or if you don’t have masks, he picks them up on the way home from practice)
But anyway you guys talk shit about people for a while and sit with the masks on (it’s usually him talking about how Oikawa is a bitch as much as he loves him) (or about whatever he and Mattsun were talking about lately)
You both get chances to vent while the masks sit on your face and you just vibe with music (usually that you pick) (he listens to like,,,meme songs and like CORPSE yk)
After masks you guys make/get some snacks and munch on those during another movie but this time you’re in comfy jammies and more relaxed Y’know
Less paying attention to the movie you’ve seen a million times and just vibing in each other’s presence and it’s just really sweet
Fall asleep on his chest
Let him fall asleep on yours
Either way, you’ve got him whipped for you he loves you
Not that he doesn’t already but that’s his favorite thing ever so please just let him do that
Always makes sure to tell you he loves you before you sleep too
If you fall asleep first he takes embarrassing pictures of you with your hair being a mess & you best bet he sends them to mattsun because “she’s so cute omfg” “dude” “dude what” “you’re so fuckin stupid” “?” “Whatever—good luck being whipped just tell me when you need to get a ring, k” “you’re such a jackass” “yeah yeah Gnight”
Zodiac/MBTI
Okay so I’m not doing a big long paragraph for all this BUT from what I understand, Gemini/Aquarius are really compatible, and ENTP and INFJ are known as “perfect matches” sO (I had a really hard time deciding between Atsumu and Makki because they're both ENTP)
Psst Gemini + Leo is compatible and so is INTP + INFJ,,,, so, again, asking you to marry me sho 💍💍
Aesthetic/Vibes
Playlist
Prelude and Fugue No. 1 in C major, BWV 846
Linus and Lucy by Vince Guaraldi Trio (meme song)
Sky Full Of Stars by The Piano Guys
Someone To You by The Piano Guys
Shut Up And Dance - Simply Three
Runners Up
Miya Atsumu, Tsukishima Kei
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TY @anarchy-penguin SOZ I ONLY JUST NOW SAW TEH MENTION >~<
8 songz - 8 peepz (づ ̄ ³ ̄)づ
tagz: well i wuz gonna tag sum mootz but then i couldn’t remember ur usernamez TwT so if ur my moot pretend i tagged u!! i just have the wurst memory evah :’)
i couldn’t choose 4 sum of these so there’s moar than 1 4 sum :P
fav song atm xP
- Joestar Rap by None Like Joshua & Musicality (ft Rustage, Nux Taku, CDawgVA, JY Shawty, The Anime Man, Chi-Chi, Caleb Hyles)
- Jojo Villains Rap by None Like Joshua & Musicality (ft Nux Taku, GR3YS0N, Shao Dow, CDawgVA, Sketti Lmao, JY Shawty, Caleb Hyles)
I LOVE THESE SONGZ SM AHHH!! i don’t listen 2 much rap but these r on repeat constantly (>ω<) teh lyrics r so clever n having teh music b each character’s theme is just!! so kewl!! i especially like josuke & tooru’s parts :D hopefully we get 1 4 teh jobros soon!!
song u associate w ur fav ship ^_^
- The Rock Show by Blink-182
- She’s Out of Her Mind by Blink-182
BOTH OF THESE SCREAM JOLYMES PROVE MEH WRONG!!1!!! tbh i do prefer foolymes but therez not a lotta polyamorous luv songz out there xp (if any1 wants 2 recommend sum though i’m all earz >:D) but ahh can’t u just imagine dem meeting a concert if they weren’t in prison!! and scene!jolyne x punk!hermès is just agsjdjjd yes <3 fellow jolymes/foolymes shippers plz send fic recs \(°□°)/
song dat could b abt u :0
- I’m Just a Kid by Simple Plan
LOLZ EDGY ALERT AGDHAHAHA i seriously do luv dis song though and ik its like ‘aww i’m a kid and i’m sad >:(‘ but like, i relate 2 it, n i like it, n it’s helped meh a lot :D (dis totally bumped my emo level up by a lot didn’t it lolz)
song u find overrated 0.0
most pop songz rn ig, but that’s just cuz i don’t like that kinda music XP
song dat remindz u of a gud memory :)
- Reindeer Games by Oso Oso
dis song remindz meh of blasting pop punk & indie music w meh bro in teh car!! sum of meh fav memories :D
last song u listened 2 ฅ^•ﻌ•^ฅ
- You’re Mine by DAGames
uhm...i can explain i swear...ITS A GUD BEAT OK!!
song dat makez u laugh XD
- Mr. Douchebag by Your Favorite Martian
- Orphan Tears by Your Favorite Martian
Y DO THESE GO SO HARD?? they’re just so random but still such bops!!
song u want ur moots 2 listen 2 ᕕ( ᐛ )ᕗ
- Chase by Batta
listen, ik it’s a jojo opening, but it’s still an emo bop!! i luv this op so much if u like pop punk/emo den u should def check it out!!
aaaand dats it!! ty again 4 teh tag!! dis was so fun :D <3
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Not Nineteen Forever (18) (Branjie/Scyvie/Ninex)- Ortega
a/n: heeey heyheyhey! i tried not to leave u all on a cliffhanger for too long. thank u so so much for all the love on the last chapter, it honestly made my whole week! again if u like this one feel free to send some love either to AQ or on my blog. hope u all enjoy! P.S. i knew i forgot to mention something! the song the girls sing at the end is called Good Girl’s Gone Bad by Booty Luv (lmfao) if u want to get the vibe of how it actually sounds, because i hate trying to convey a song via simply italicised lyrics lolol)
trigger warning: alcohol xo
please note: this fic contains young adults often behaving in irresponsible/unadvisable ways with regards to alcohol, drugs and sex. if you are someone who feels as if they could be heavily influenced by fic and incorporate what happens in the plot into ur own life, pls steer clear!
summary: Brooke, Yvie and Nina are three flatmates who forged a friendship in their first year of university and picked up some other waifs and strays along the way. Now in their final year, there are feelings that need to be unravelled and confessions to be made whilst navigating drunk nights, hungover mornings, takeaways, group chats, library meetups, cafe gossiping, and the small matter of getting a degree.
last chapter: the gang headed to a big house in the country and things between Brooke and Vanessa got a little more than civil in the hot tub.
this chapter: the girls have to pick up the pieces for the 195th time. but karaoke and gin solves everything, right?
***
Scarlet lay back in bed, panting and looking up at the ceiling as Yvie emerged from the covers underneath her, her cheeks red. Holding her arms out for a cuddle, Scarlet’s heart swelled up as Yvie, exhausted, threw her head down against Scarlet’s chest. Scarlet knew Yvie would be able to hear her heart beat. She liked that. She liked being intimate with Yvie in ways like they just had been, when Yvie’s tongue was between her legs and Scarlet was crying out into the silence of the house without a care for who heard them, but she also loved the intimacy of Yvie knowing parts of her that nobody else knew, like a secret they both shared.
“I love you,” Scarlet sighed, pressing a kiss to Yvie’s chaos of curls as the other girl wrapped her arms around her waist and squeezed.
“I love you too, baby. So much,” Yvie replied, Scarlet able to feel how she smiled against her skin and unable to stop herself from smiling too.
They lay there for a moment in the foreign room, Scarlet taking in their surroundings. A green carpet, scuffed and worn. A white ceiling with endless cracks snaking across it like a map. An inexplicably out of context painting of a hunt in the countryside, and a window with no curtains where the bright sunshine of the new day shone in unrelentingly through the unpolished glass.
“How are you this morning, you hanging?” Yvie asked her, Scarlet frowning.
“Nah. I never drank that much. You?” she asked, sitting up a little and causing Yvie to shift.
“I’ve got a little headache but I’m not sure if it was the alcohol or just this bed.”
“We were drinking red wine, to be fair. That was a bad call,” Scarlet rubbed her temples, concluding that she’d had a lucky escape. They’d bought it when Plastique had stopped at the small Co-Op in the village nearest the house to stock up, and they’d giggled in the wine aisle as they had decided to buy something civilised to pretend they were characters in an Agatha Christie novel and swan around the big house dressed to the nines. Although when Scarlet had seen Yvie last night she’d immediately wanted to rip her dress off. It had turned out Yvie had thought the same, and a little smile spread across Scarlet’s face as she remembered them, pressed up against the bedroom wall, messy and passionate as they hitched their dresses up and touched each other frantically and came apart. Scarlet wriggled, crossing her legs and squeezing them together.
“Jesus, what is with you this weekend? You’re so horny, like, all the time,” Yvie laughed, noticing her reaction. Scarlet gave a guilty smile.
“I can’t help it that I have the sexiest girlfriend here,” she shrugged, Yvie rolling herself onto her back and throwing her fists in the air into a triumphant stretch.
“Actually I think you’ll find I have the official hottest girl in the room as a girlfriend, so. Check and mate, princess."
Scarlet gave a snort. "Hey, I was merely a pawn in the huge game of fucking chess that is Vanjie and Brooke at the moment, I don’t think I was anything more than a jealousy crash test dummy.”
“Hmm, well. You got dummy right,” Yvie said playfully, laughing as Scarlet pushed her slightly off the bed, then pulled her back again. Scarlet pulled her close, unease forming in the pit of her stomach.
“You know I’m just yours, right? I only-”
“Oh my God Scarlet, relax!” Yvie laughed, squeezing her. “I know there was nothing to that kiss at all, shut up. I trust you. I love you. It was a dare, these girls are our friends, and Vanjie’s about as harmless as an actual cucumber. Chill.”
Scarlet obediently relaxed, glad to have reassured Yvie even if she didn’t need reassured in the first place. She paused, then spoke again. “I don’t know, you could do a bit of damage to someone with a cucumber.”
“I’d do a bit of damage to you with a cucumber,” Yvie wiggled her eyebrows, Scarlet screeching a laugh and swatting at her.
“You’re disgusting. I hate you.”
“You wish you hated me,” Yvie stuck her tongue out at her, and Scarlet sighed.
“It would make my life a lot easier if I did,” she replied playfully, a loud rumble from her stomach cutting her off. She frowned. “Hungry.”
Yvie gave another stretch, her ankles cracking loudly. “Do you want to go down, get the glasses from the living room and stick some bacon on a pan or some shit?”
“Stick some bacon on a pan or some shit. Gordon Ramsay, love your work!”
The two girls continued to bicker as they threw their pyjamas back on, bounced down the stairs and collected the glasses left in the living room from last night. Scarlet was glad to see that there were no rings left from any drinks on tables, her airbnb account safe from a scathing review from whoever even owned this place. Looking at the sofa her and Yvie had sat on last night, she laughed as she remembered her and Vanjie’s ridiculous kiss. The girl got no points for subtlety.
“How did Brooke get more jealous than you when me and Vanj got with each other? You’re my actual girlfriend and you gave less of a shit,” Scarlet mused, walking into the kitchen behind Yvie and setting the glasses down beside the sink.
“Because I know that I’m yours and you’re mine and Brooke knows that she fucked it with Vanjie so she can’t kiss her whenever she wants to like I can with you. I got to have you back in my arms after that kiss and have you reassure me, she didn’t get that,” Yvie shrugged, getting the bacon out of the fridge. She ran her tongue over her teeth as she locked eyes with Scarlet. “Plus it was hot, not gonna lie.”
“Fuck, are we going to have a threesome now, is that what this is?” Scarlet asked dryly, secretly flattered.
“Bad enough having to throw your fuckin’ teddy across the room whenever I’m dicking you down at yours.”
“Just once I’d love to talk about sex with you and not want to blow my own brains out,” Scarlet continued deadpanning, snorting as Yvie began to laugh in her own goofy way. Scarlet loved the old married couple bickering that they always seemed to fall into, having absorbed so much of Yvie’s humour the longer she spent with her. It was one of just so many things she loved about her. “Did something go on between them last night, by the way?”
“Oh, hundred percent,” Yvie rolled her eyes as she wrenched a frying pan from a cupboard. “Yay, another Brooke Lynn shaped mess me and Nina are gonna have to pick up the pieces of! Can’t wait!”
“Yves,” Scarlet warned, dunking the glasses into the hot, soapy water she’d filled the sink with. “Be nice. She’s your best friend, we all make mistakes.”
“I want to grab her by the shoulders and shake her like a fucking maraca. It’s like she’s been challenged to make as many bad decisions that she can and if she gets to a certain amount she wins a prize. What do you think her target is? Two hundred? Five hundred?”
“Stop,” Scarlet laughed, her smile almost cracking her face as she turned around, hearing a set of footsteps pad softly down the steps to the kitchen. Akeria emerged, her makeup from the night before smeared across her face like a child’s painting and her long, blonde hair twirled up into a bun. “Morning, Kiki. You sleep okay?”
“The sleep was fine. It’s the awake part I’m strugglin’ with,” she groaned, sliding into one of the wooden chairs and resting her head in her hands. “Is this what a hangover’s like when you turn twenty two? I don’t want it.”
“No, that’s what a hangover’s like when you drink three bottles of six pound Shiraz,” Yvie raised an eyebrow at the suffering girl, Scarlet feeling guilty as she laughed.
“Leave me alone, it’s my birthday,” Akeria whined, Scarlet’s stomach rumbling again as the smell of bacon began to waft through the kitchen.
“Are you gonna use that excuse for the entirety of March?” Yvie chuckled, turning around from the aga. Scarlet took the rolls they’d bought out of the cupboard and got the butter out of the fridge.
“Yes,” Akeria rubbed her eyes so hard Scarlet worried for her eyelash extensions. “Tell me I didn’t do anythin’ embarrassing?”
“You honestly didn’t,” Scarlet said kindly, her heart going out to Akeria. “I don’t think you have any bad decisions to worry about.”
“Apart from the whole drinking three bottles of wine thing,” Yvie shrugged.
“Vanjie, on the other hand…” Akeria sighed, Yvie growing animated at the stove.
“Right? We were just talking about this. Do you know what happened?”
“Not yet. She better be in that fucking room with Silk and Plastique or I’ll personally whoop her ass,” Akeria narrowed her eyes.
“She’s not,” came Plastique’s voice from the stairs, Silky following after.
“Good morning campers! How are we?” Silky’s voice boomed cheerfully into the echoing kitchen, making Scarlet flinch even though she wasn’t all that hungover.
“Silky, I’m honestly going to murder you in your sleep,” Akeria said flatly.
“You think this is bad! The bitch decided to give me a full one-woman show of The Bodyguard last night before bed!” Plastique cried in outrage, filling the kettle up and flicking on the switch.
“It was BEAUTIFUL and EMOTIONAL and GROUNDBREAKING!” Silky yelled, throwing herself down into the chair next to her flatmate dramatically.
“Please someone kill me,” Akeria sighed.
“Were you guys talking about Brooke and Vanjie?” Plastique steered the conversation back as the kettle bubbled. “They’re in Brooke’s room. She didn’t sleep in ours.”
“I’m losing the will to live with her, I swear to Jesus,” Akeria sighed woefully, shaking her head like a long-suffering mother.
“So wait, what exactly is going on between them? Like, we can build quite a unique perspective here. We got me and we got Yvie to tell you what Brooke’s thinking, and we got you three to give us Vanjie’s perspective,” Plastique said, with all the energy of a detective solving a mystery. Yvie snorted.
“Yeah, good luck with that, we all know Brooke’s mind is like fucking Alcatraz,” she rolled her eyes, distributing the bacon between the rolls Scarlet had sliced open and buttered.
“And Monet can give us the Monique tea. Once she stops banging Nina,” Plastique shrugged. “Who wants tea, who wants coffee?”
“I want the sweet embrace of death,” Akeria murmured.
“TEA!” Silky ordered at top volume.
“Or failing that, to be deaf.”
Scarlet helped Plastique dish up teas and coffees. She remembered Monet and Nina were both tea people, and how they both took it (she’d spent enough time round at Yvie’s to be a tea-making expert for everyone that lived or was frequently round at the flat) so she made one up for each of the girls in case they emerged within the next five minutes or so.
“We should set up a charity. Flatmates Living with Absolute Pisstakers,” Yvie laughed humourlessly, Scarlet laughing as she realised something.
“FLAPS,” she abbreviated, causing the girls round the table to snort out a few giggles.
“Okay so what do you know?” Silky pointed a finger at Scarlet, the girl jumping a little in surprise. “We wanna see if it matches what we know.”
Scarlet shrugged. She’d had lectures with Vanessa and hung out like she always did, but if she was honest Vanessa hadn’t given away much about how she was feeling about Brooke. Scarlet had tried to prise something out of her, mentioning how it was good they had seemed to get along at her birthday party, but Vanessa had just shrugged and said she had to grow up and be civil eventually. She relayed this to the girls, Silky sighing deeply.
“Okay, good. So we know about as much as you,” she said, voice full of regret.
“She’s treating the whole thing as a massive joke, but we know different. We were there when she cried herself to sleep in the flat, we made her food when she couldn’t get out of bed. None of which she fuckin’ ate, but still. We know how much Brooke affected her, even if Brooke doesn’t,” Akeria explained. Scarlet’s heart hurt remembering how badly Vanessa took the breakup.
“She’s pretending that she’s over her and fuckin’ around with Monique ain’t helping,” Silky hissed.
Plastique made a face. “I think Brooke knew how much Vanessa liked her. She felt really bad about the breakup, but she was just doing what she thought was best.”
“Which is okay if that’s the decision that she’s sticking to! But it’s not! The bitch got up last night, kissed her in front of all of us and then probably slept with her!” Akeria sighed irritably, tearing into her bacon roll with aggression. Scarlet mirrored her sigh. That was the thing, she did have to agree with Akeria- Brooke breaking things off with Vanjie was fine, but changing her mind so violently? It had to mess with Vanjie’s head.
“Well, basically,” Yvie began, exhaling a little as she presumably knew what she was about to say would cause tension. “I get the impression from Brooke that she has changed her decision.”
Silky laughed harshly in disbelief. “What?!”
Yvie raised her hands in the air. “I mean, don’t shoot the messenger, but yeah. She was big pressed when V started sleeping with Monique. I think she feels like she fucked it.”
“Well, she did,” Akeria said venomously, just as footsteps came from the little steps to the kitchen. The girls held their breath, Scarlet’s eyes growing wide as she craned her neck to see who was coming.
“Morning!” Nina’s sing-song voice cut through the silence happily, pausing abruptly when she felt the atmosphere in the room. Scarlet felt sorry for her; she had no idea what she was walking into.
“Hey, girl. We made you both tea,” she smiled, addressing Monet who had traipsed in behind Nina in her huge baggy pyjamas, looking every inch still half-asleep.
“Okay, and what is the tea? Because you’re all suspicious as fuck right now. In the time I’ve known these girls, they’re never silent,” Monet raised an eyebrow, taking her cup and leaning against the counters. Silky leant forward, her face conspiratorial.
“We’re talking Brooke and Vanjie.”
“Oh, good,” Monet flared her nostrils as she celebrated sarcastically.
“Good, so you’re about as done with them as we are,” Akeria rolled her eyes. “V didn’t sleep in her own bed last night. We think she slept with Brooke.”
“Well, that was obvious enough when they never came to watch the film.”
Scarlet pulled a face, eager not to jump to conclusions. “Maybe they talked everything out? We can’t assume.”
“Scarlet, come on. If there was talking involved, it wasn’t gonna be U rated,” Yvie smiled indulgently at her. Scarlet had to concede.
“You’re Monique’s flatmate, girl, where does she come into all of this?” Plastique asked Monet, bringing her knees up to her chest and balancing her coffee cup on top.
“It’s none of my business,” Monet threw her hands up in the air. Akeria rolled her eyes.
“Come on, bitch, give us a crumb.”
Monet sighed, relenting. “Aight, well. Monique is well aware how much Vanjie still seems into Brooke, because from what she’s said Vanessa has made that perfectly clear to her.”
“Oh, Jesus Christ on a crucifix,” Silky exclaimed, rolling her eyes.
“So Vanjie’s still hung up on Brooke?” Scarlet asked, trying to clarify the situation.
“And Brooke’s still into Vanjie,” Nina said casually, some of Yvie’s coffee splashing onto her pyjamas as she whirled around to face Nina.
“What?!”
“She told me after Scarlet’s birthday. Shit, I wasn’t meant to tell you guys that,” Nina clamped a hand over her mouth involuntarily, worry etched onto her face. “Guys, fuck, you can’t tell her I told you.”
“Nice of her to let me know, Jesus!” Yvie snarled, Scarlet reaching a hand out and stroking her knuckles soothingly.
“I wouldn’t take it personally, babe. You know it’s like trying to get blood from a stone with her and her feelings. I guess it’s good she at least told one of us?” Nina gave a sympathetic shrug, clearly feeling bad.
Plastique tore a hand through her hair. “So wait, Brooke likes Vanjie and Vanjie likes Brooke? Why don’t they just get back together then?”
“Because like fuck is my girl getting hurt again when Brooke changes her mind for a third time,” Akeria scowled up at Plastique. “And anyone who thinks they’re gonna be good together after everything that’s happened is trash, sorry.”
“Kiki, c'mon. That’s harsh,” Nina frowned, disapproving. Akeria shot her a nasty look.
“Nobody wants to see Brooke or Vanjie get hurt. They’re both our friends,” Scarlet cut in, trying to play peacemaker.
“I’m just sayin’, Vanj would do well to just focus on Monique, who from what I’ve heard actually treats her right. She certainly doesn’t use her like a fucking sex doll whenever she wants,” Akeria spat. Scarlet grew tense as she saw Yvie bristling.
“Actually that’s exactly what their entire friendship is built on,” Monet cut in with a laugh, keen to ease the tension.
“Akeria, come on, we both know that’s bullshit. If Brooke and Vanj did sleep with each other last night it was one messy fuck after a bit of drinking, they weren’t thinking straight.”
“Did you see V top up her drink once last night?” Akeria shot back instantly, the lawyer jumping out. “Yeah, exactly. And Brooke had what, three, four beers? I was sinking more than that in parks when I was fifteen, that’s fucking children’s numbers. Weren’t thinking straight my ass. They both knew exactly what they were doing.”
“Brooke doesn’t exactly know that V still likes her back, does she? For all she knows this is just a bit of fun to her. Let’s not be too quick to judge,” Nina soothed. Silky snorted with derision.
“Nina, I love you, but the blind man’s fuckin’ guide dog can see Vanjie’s still got feelings.”
“Ah, but you have to remember Brooke’s got the emotional intelligence of a Build-A-Bear,” Plastique pointed out, Akeria shrugging slowly and nodding.
“I guess.”
“I have a great plan for you all,” Monet said suddenly, frowning ever so slightly. “Why don’t you just let the pair of them make their own fuckin’ decisions and mind your own damn business? This has nothing to do with any of us.”
“Sorry Monet, but if it involves our best friend getting her heart broke again then it damn right does have something to do with me!” Akeria objected, Plastique breaking out into awkward laughter at the tense trajectory of the conversation.
Monet calmed down, taking a deep breath. “Look, Kiki, it’s hard for me too watching one of my best friends sleeping with someone that’s clearly still hung up on someone else. But it’s their lives, not ours. We can’t make them do anything. You just have to be the good friends I know you bitches are and be there for them if it all falls down.”
“When it all falls down.” Yvie raised her eyebrows and took a long sip of her drink.
“Yvie, you’re not helping!” Scarlet hissed.
As Monet’s words sank in, the girls had a small moment of silence to reflect on their conversation. Before Scarlet had time to generate any new thoughts, however, there came a sharp thud of footsteps down the stairs and Vanessa emerged, her hair brushed, her makeup removed, and wearing plain jeans and the orange jumper Scarlet had seen her wear so often. Her face was grave, and she pulled her trainers onto her white socked feet as she spoke.
“Kiki. I’m packed. Ready to leave when you are."
The room was silent as she haphazardly tied her laces, stood up, and left as quickly as she had come in.
The rest of the day was decidedly tense. Vanjie hardly spoke a word to anyone that morning, and when Brooke emerged she was similarly silent. Nobody ripped into them about the obvious- usually they would, but this time was different. Feelings were on the line, and people were getting hurt. Scarlet and Yvie spoke about the situation with Plastique all the way home, and by the time they both got back to the flat Brooke had already barricaded herself in her room. Yvie would usually try to talk to her, but not today. Today, Brooke was best left alone.
It took her three days to say something.
Scarlet was round at the flat and she and Yvie were in the living room with Nina, watching Coronation Street (Yvie’s choice, of course) when Brooke came into the kitchen, walked calmly through to the sofa, threw herself down on it and let out a small sigh.
“Hey, babe! How’re you- oh shit. Oh, girl, what’s wrong?” Nina sighed, seeing two tears fall from Brooke’s face that she quickly hid in the sleeves of her black hoodie.
“I’m a fucking terrible person,” she cried quietly, still burying her face in her hands as Nina launched herself into the armchair Brooke occupied and wrapped her arms around her in a hug.
“No, Brooke, you’re not. You’re not, honey,” Nina sighed, shaking her head and murmuring into Brooke’s hair.
“Everything’s ruined. Vanessa hates me…and you guys probably all do too,” Brooke sniffed. Scarlet sighed.
“Brooke, nobody hates you. Least of all us! You’ll always have us!” she smiled comfortingly. Brooke brought her head up to face her, resentment in her eyes.
“Oh, Scarlet, come on, I know your loyalties lie with Vanessa.”
Scarlet let out a displeased laugh, appealing to Yvie. “Fuck me, right!”
Brooke let out a sob as if she’d immediately regretted snapping. “I’m sorry Scarlet, that was unfair. Shit, fuck, there I go again. All I do is just push people away and bottle up my problems and never tell anybody anything. What the fuck is wrong with me?”
“Nothing’s wrong with you! And you can always tell us anything. You know that!” Nina shushed her, tucking her hair behind her ears. Brooke smiled gently at her.
Yvie piped up, leaning towards Brooke. “Yeah. And you could start by telling us what went down between you two the other night when we were away, because I don’t understand what’s happened.”
Brooke took a long, deep breath and sighed. “We got carried away…she’d been joking with me all day. Like she was flirting and being touchy…anyway, we were in the hot tub and we were talking about us. Kind of. How long I’d liked her for before we got together, and the fact we’d kissed. And then everything just sort of happened. You know we slept with each other, I know you all know. You’ve all got brains. Things were said…and I don’t think she believes any of it. Even though it was all true. And even if she wanted to speak to me, I wouldn’t even know where to begin…fuck-”
“What did you say to her?” Scarlet asked gently, holding her breath a little.
“That I missed her. That I was sorry. But I feel like she thinks I was saying it because I just wanted her so badly. I mean, I did. I do…fuck,” Brooke sighed, rubbing her face with her hands.
“What happened when you woke up? That morning. You were both obviously…not yourselves,” Nina said, trying to word things tactically. Brooke let out a huge exhale.
“I woke up and she wasn’t even in bed with me. She just pulled on her bikini from the night before, had a face on like she wanted to kill me. I tried to talk things out, but she just told me there was nothing to say. She didn’t want to speak to me…” Brooke hung her head. “And that night, after we’d slept together, we’d just…lain there and held each other. We never said anything, she didn’t leave to go back to her own room. She put her head on my chest and I put my arms around her and just felt her breathing. It was like everything was back to normal, back to how it was. Jesus, I’ve absolutely fucked it.”
This time it was Yvie that fell forward and hugged her as Brooke sobbed, quiet and resigned. Scarlet felt her heart hurt for her. As much as Brooke had behaved inconsiderately and rashly, she’d clearly recognised the mistake she’d made. Scarlet believed that she did genuinely care about Vanjie, that she wanted to make things right with her. The only issue was how to try and make Vanessa see that.
“Right,” Nina said decisively, slapping her thighs. “I’ve got an idea. Let’s go out. Let’s put all of this out of your mind and just remember what it feels like to have fun being silly and drinking with friends before all this drama happened.”
Brooke, to her credit, let out a genuinely humoured laugh. “Nina, I was silly and drinking with friends three nights ago. That’s exactly what got me into this mess.”
"No,” Nina said firmly. She was going to make such a good teacher, Scarlet thought, as she watched the girl’s face snap into a frown. “This time you’re not going to think about V. If she turns up, you don’t interact. If Akeria makes a fucking nippy as shit comment, you blank her. This is going to be a fun night, with no drama. I promise.”
Nina was clearly some level of convincing, because Brooke rubbed her eyes and sighed. “I mean…getting drunk and turning our speakers up so loud I can no longer hear my thoughts sounds pretty good.”
The three flatmates shared an indulgent grin with each other. Brooke laughed, letting out a resigned groan.
“Yves, Scar. You down?“
Scarlet smiled at Brooke so hard she felt her face hurt. Reaching out and squeezing Yvie’s hand, she knew what her answer would be. “Always, angel.”
Impromptu nights out were always the best ones, Scarlet thought, and she hoped tonight would be no exception. To be fair to Nina, it seemed as if it had been a good idea. Brooke had smiled and laughed as she helped the other girls decide what to wear, cobbled together pre-drinks from the random assortment of spirits and mixers they had around their flat, ordered Nina to either skip or turn up songs on the playlist. Nina, seemingly the one in charge, had heard about this karaoke bar from Monet which seemed to simply be a karaoke machine in the middle of a quintessential old man’s pub named The Swan, but Monet had posed it to Nina as one of the best nights out she’d ever had so of course her word was gospel. Secretly Scarlet kind of hoped Vanessa wouldn’t turn up, which was harsh but Scarlet was as much Brooke’s friend as she was Vanjie’s and she just wanted Brooke to have a good night after so much upset.
“We don’t have to message the others, you know,” Scarlet shrugged as she emerged from Yvie’s room in a borrowed red cropped jumper and the jeans she’d worn to the flat in the first place. She got the vibe that this night out was not a fancy one.
“Noo, I wanna see Plastique. And Silk’s always fun,” Brooke pouted, apparently a little tipsy already.
“If we have a night out without at least offering it to Antigua Road it’ll only start more drama,” Yvie rolled her eyes. “Besides, they’re still our friends. Also I would live to see Plastique doing karaoke.”
Scarlet laughed, agreeing as she typed out a message to their group.
Yvie’s Bitch: Ladies, we are thinking karaoke tonight??? Anyone down? Xxxxxxxxxx
okay then: omg yesyesyesyesyesyes!!!!
okay then: can Ariel come too???
Scarlet was glad of the prospect of a new addition to their night. Ariel’s presence would hopefully diffuse a bit of the drama, nobody could exactly kick off when someone new was there.
Yvie’s Bitch: Yes absolutely!!!
There was a pause. Scarlet flicked her eyes over to Brooke, who had an insincere smile on her face as Yvie and Nina did every horrific TikTok dance imaginable. Scarlet saw her turning her phone over in her hand, looking at it anxiously. When Scarlet’s phone buzzed, so did Brooke’s, and she watched as the girl practically pounced on the message.
large incongruous silkworm spiced praline: KARAOKE BITCH????? OH LAWD WE COMIN
Pres that evening were divided up between the three flats, a mutual and unspoken understanding that it was probably for the best if they met at the bar. Scarlet was glad that Brooke seemed to loosen up as the evening went on, and by the time they were in the taxi she was chatty and giggly, her words spilling out of her like liquid. When they arrived the pub was packed, and they nearly couldn’t see the girls sitting cramped around a small table that was clearly only meant for four people but was also the best they were going to get in the crowds. Scarlet didn’t miss the way Vanjie blanked Brooke as if she wasn’t there, going for a hug with Yvie and then with Nina who were on either side of her. Scarlet vowed to speak to her about things at lectures on Monday. They only had a week of classes until the Easter break began, and then they would all start basically living in the library as dissertation hand-ins and exams would start looming over them like a huge stress boulder. Scarlet tried to focus her energy into chatting politely with Ariel, who was sitting beside an already very drunk Plastique. Scarlet had met her only a few times before when she’d been with Plastique on campus, but she’d never come to any big group nights out with the girls and Scarlet wanted to make her feel welcome. Although that was currently hard with the tension between Vanessa and Brooke, and by proxy Akeria, who had a protective arm slung around Vanjie like a mother lioness. Scarlet was distracted from the scene for a moment by Yvie, who had bought her a gin and lemonade. Scarlet thanked her and squeezed up on the chair she was sitting on to accommodate her girlfriend. She felt herself smile involuntarily as Yvie kissed her cheek. Yvie, the drink in her hand, and somebody new to get to know. Those were the three things Scarlet would focus on.
And that worked out. For a while. But Brooke had wanted to drown her feelings and it looked as if she was giving that a pretty good attempt. She’d returned from a simple drinks round with Jagerbombs for everyone (even Vanessa, although as peace offerings went it was one of the worst Scarlet had ever seen) and had been quite happy to sink the ones that some of the girls had refused. Then she’d dragged Nina up to sing a duet of Beyonce and Shakira’s Beautiful Liar which Brooke was essentially making into soft porn judging by the way she was flipping her hair and grinding on Nina, who was dying of laughter as she tried to get her notes out. Scarlet was nudged by Yvie who nodded to Akeria and Vanjie. The two were frowning at the girls on stage and muttering disapprovingly.
“I’m going to say something. This is a joke, they’re acting like they’re in high school,” Yvie rolled her eyes, as the girls got up from their seats and moved in the direction of the bar where Silky was in the queue for drinks.
“Don’t, Yves. Kiki’s only looking out for V, and she’s still upset. Brooke’s taking it a bit too far, to be fair,” Scarlet winced as Brooke hit a note that definitely wasn’t written anywhere in the song.
“She’s trying to have a fun night, Scarlet. But she can’t, because Judge fuckin’ Judy’s giving her death stares any time she so much as breathes,” Yvie seethed, whipping her head around and trying to find the girls in the crowd. It appeared they weren’t in the queue any more.
“They’ve probably gone to smoke. Yvie, leave it, baby. Brooke is having a good time, look!” Scarlet insisted, as the song came to an end and the girls laughed and hugged each other. Brooke almost took a tumble going down the steps from the podium the stage was on, and flopped back onto her chair.
“I’m the next Beyonce. I’ll take autographs later,” she murmured, Scarlet laughing at her ridiculousness. “I also need to pee. Anyone else?”
Scarlet indulged her and went with her. She didn’t actually need, but she also needed to make sure that Brooke wasn’t about to pass out on a toilet floor, so the two of them crammed into the only cubicle that wasn’t out of order or already in use.
“You’re having a good night, then?” she asked, looking at the grubby floor as Brooke pulled her jeans down.
“I’m actually having…the best time,” Brooke nodded emphatically, carelessly ripping bits of toilet paper out of the dispenser. Scarlet watched it fall like gigantic blossoms as Brooke rambled on. “This was the best idea, Nina is…Nina’s just so good with ideas, she’s going to be a primary teacher…and she’s going to be so good at it…they’ll probably make her a headteacher within the year…”
Brooke finished, stood up, flipped the lid of the toilet seat down unnecessarily loudly, yanked up her jeans, then fell back onto the lid. Scarlet sighed.
“Jesus. This is like babysitting. Come on, zip up your jeans.”
Brooke obeyed, her limbs moving as if she was made of jelly. As she did up her zipper and the button at the top, she kept speaking. “I’m having such a good time, oh my God, Nina just has the best ideas ever…you know this whole thing was her idea? She’s going to make the best teacher ever…I wish I had a teacher like her when I was little…”
Suddenly, Scarlet froze as she heard quiet sobs come from the cubicle next to them, and judging from the way Brooke had stopped talking, she’d heard them too. The two girls were still and silent, and Scarlet could see the same hope dawning on Brooke’s face that she felt in her gut.
Please don’t let this be Vanjie, please let it be some random drunk girl instead…
“Shhh, shhh, babe, c’mon. It’s gonna be alright,” Akeria’s voice was soft, lilting through the wall, and Scarlet felt her heart sink. Fuck. She snuck a quick look at Brooke, whose face was blank and expressionless, just blinking slowly with glazed eyes as she looked in the direction of the voices.
“But it ain’t alright, is it? None of it’s alright,” Vanessa’s voice came, thick with emotion and sadness in a way that made Scarlet’s heart crack.
“Vanjie, the goddess herself Miss Whitney Houston told us that it’s not right, but it’s okay,” Scarlet was unsure who spoke next until she realised that it was Silky, her voice softer and more gentle than she’d ever heard it before. She’d coaxed a blessed laugh out of Vanessa, and Scarlet was glad she was there for her. “You’re here, you’re doing the hard part. It’s gonna get less hard every day.”
Vanessa’s sobs quietened, and a huge sigh came through the wall instead. The next time her voice came it was quiet, nothing more than resigned and sincere. “I miss her…so fucking much, girls.”
“I know you do, angel. I know you do.”
There was a pause, a sniff, and a small stifled sob.
“It just hurts that…I’m still in love with her, and I never got the chance to tell her in the first place.”
Scarlet felt as if she’d just been launched out of a plane on a parachute jump with no goggles, safety gear, or parachute. Fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck. This was bad, this was so bad. She looked frantically to Brooke, who had a single mascara tear rolling quickly down her face, her eyes threatening to overflow.
Akeria’s voice was strict. “Who do you love more, Brooke or yourself?”
There was a pause as Vanessa let out a breath. “Myself.”
“Correct answer. Come on, girl, look at you. This ain’t how you spend a night out.”
Another small laugh from Vanjie, meanwhile Brooke looked more broken than Scarlet had ever seen her. Back in the bar, whoever had been singing had finished, and the host’s voice was now booming over the speakers. The loud noise was muffled as it came through the bathroom wall.
“Alright, up next we have the dreamgirls! Do we have the dreamgirls?”
Silky let out a screech. “BITCH! It’s us!”
A little pause, then Akeria’s voice. “Your call, V. Home or stay, what do you want?”
There was a small sniff, a pause, then a scramble from the cubicle. Silky let out a cheer, and Scarlet heard the bathroom door swing open then shut again. Scarlet and Brooke were silent and frozen. Scarlet didn’t know what to say- didn’t know what she could say, so she simply held out her arms for a hug. Brooke stood up, shuffling forward and wrapping her arms around her, Scarlet trying to convey how sorry she was through squeezing her tight. The ditzy, drunk girl from before had been replaced with this quiet statue, and Scarlet didn’t know if she was imagining it or if it had been the confession they’d both just heard but Brooke seemed to have managed to sober up slightly. There was silence, and then Brooke gave a murmur against her shoulder.
“I’m in love with her too.”
Absolutely nothing about Brooke’s admission came as a shock to Scarlet. She sighed, rubbing the taller girl’s back. “Then tell her.”
She felt Brooke shake her head and let out a breath, her ribcage shrinking in Scarlet’s arms then blowing slowly up like a balloon as she took a shuddery, verge-of-tears intake of breath. “No. It’s…no.”
Scarlet nodded understandingly, then stepped back, tilted Brooke’s face up to look at her and swept two fingers underneath each of her eyes, catching her tears before they fell. “Hey. We’re not gonna let this ruin your night, okay?”
Brooke nodded silently. Scarlet knew the words were bullshit as soon as they’d left her mouth but she had to say something vaguely positive, she had to at least offer a speck of hope. She took Brooke’s hand and squeezed it, forcing a grin. “Besides, Silky singing is going to be a mess that we need to experience.”
Brooke let out a snort, a smile gradually creeping onto her face as Scarlet led her out of the cubicle. They washed their hands rapidly then grabbed fistfuls of scratchy paper towels before re-emerging into the bar and sitting down at their table. Plastique, three sheets to the wind, put her hands on either side of Brooke’s face.
“Where were you, bitch?! The girls are doing a song!”
Almost on cue, the lights began to flash purple and pink and a dance bassline blew out through the speakers. Silky’s voice cut through it loudly, the three girls already assembled on stage and holding microphones.
“Good evening, Swan! We are your Dreamgirls, show us some love!”
Scarlet couldn’t help but laugh as she whooped along with the rest of the bar, Akeria launching into her verse in a moderately tuneful voice.
“So you think that you can play around,
And that she will simply stay around,
Did you think that she’d just wait around for you?
Wait ‘til you get the news, wait ‘til you get the news that she’s,
��Bout to do the same thing, ‘bout to play the same game!”
Scarlet risked a look at Brooke before the girls launched into the chorus. She was sure the song choice had been a coincidence. Maybe not. Scarlet always tried to be optimistic, but Brooke was smiling tightly as Plastique clung to her arm and screeched with excitement. The three girls hit the chorus, attempting and half-succeeding at a harmony.
“When ya good girl’s gone bad, whatcha gonna do,
When she’s out there doin’ the things that you do?
When ya good girl’s gone bad, whatcha gonna say,
When she’s out there playin’ the games that you play?
Whatcha gonna say to that, whatcha gonna do when she hurts you,
Whatcha gonna say to that, whatcha gonna do?”
Scarlet’s attention was pulled from the song as Yvie sat down next to her with two drinks, sliding one across to her. “This is like cats being strangled.”
Scarlet bellowed a laugh. “Aww, come on! They’re not that bad. Plus everyone seems to be loving them.”
She watched Yvie looking around the bar. There were a group of five middle-aged women in front of the stage, dancing around and cheering them on. In the corner, a big stag night group were shouting approvingly during Silky’s current verse, Silky of course winking and waving at them mid-solo. The rest of the bar was either punching the air for the girls or singing along incoherently. Yvie laughed, kissing Scarlet’s temple lovingly. “Babe. Everyone’s pissed.”
Scarlet laughed, shrugging as the three girls launched into the ever-so slightly cutting chorus again. She didn’t look at Brooke, even though she wanted to. Plastique would be looking after her, she hoped anyway. Suddenly Vanessa launched into the breakdown, her voice loud as she sang out into the microphone.
“She’s been watchin’ everything you do,
She’s been learnin’ everything from you,
And it won’t be too long before she shows you just how it feels…”
Silky and Akeria grabbed Vanjie by the waist as they backed her up, making their flatmate laugh as they belted out the last chorus together. Scarlet felt her heart swell up. As much as the whole situation was messy and people were getting hurt, Scarlet supposed it had brought out the love everyone had for their friends. Akeria had said she was done with Vanessa, but she wasn’t, not really. Scarlet could see that as she twerked against her on stage, making Vanessa laugh through her final lines.
“Whatcha gonna say to that, whatcha gonna do when she hurts you,
Whatcha gonna say to that, whatcha gonna do?”
As the pub roared their approval, Silky yelled into the microphone. “Thank you, Swan! Gentlemen…I will be at the bar.”
Scarlet grabbed Yvie’s arm as they both burst out laughing at Silky’s no-fucks-given approach to finding her men. As Scarlet turned to Brooke in the hope that Silky’s comment would’ve made her laugh, she saw with a small flash of panic that her chair was completely empty- no jacket, no bag, and no Brooke.
“Plastique! Where’s-” Scarlet shouted over to her, then realised that she’d had her back to Brooke’s chair and had been talking to Ariel. As the girl turned to face her, Scarlet shook her head. Casting her eyes to Nina’s chair, she found it equally empty. She knew they’d both gone home, and Nina would make her tea as Brooke got upset over the confession she’d overheard earlier. Casting an eye over her friends that remained in the bar, Scarlet did a small calculation in her head. Just over three months until graduation.
Scarlet hoped to God they would all get their shit together soon.
#rpdr fanfiction#not nineteen forever#n19f#ortega#branjie#scyvie#ninex#brooke lynn hytes#vanessa vanjie mateo#yvie oddly#scarlet envy#lesbian au#college au#university au#nina west#akeria davenport#silky nutmeg ganache#plastique tiara#monet x change#s11
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Happy 2nd birthday to guksthighs!!!!!! I sincerely love every single piece that you have written!! 💜❤️❤️ i hope ur doing well and i miss u :( I'm happy to have discovered ur blog, i luv u and take care Also, question, whats ur fave song from the map of the soul: persona? Mines is Home 🏠
AAA omg!! thank you nonnie and i miss you too :((
also i love persona because namjoonnnn kills me,,
Celebrate my birthday with a memory, op, etc!
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16 thru 20 if u want ^_^ also i luv ur new theme + carrd !!!
oh you are so lovely thank you >.<
16. a song that you like that romanticizes being a teenager:
ohno this is a double answer but seventeen by haley blais!!
17. a song that makes you want to grab your friends jump up and down dancing and screaming the lyrics:
(any queen or abba song or) electric love by børns
18. a song that you like that the lyrics are just so beautiful they’re practically poetry:
?!?!?!? this was so hard for me i guess i don’t care about lyrics that much so i just chose favoritism by she’s only sixteen
19. a song that you can imagine listening to in an abandoned church:
i think op of the questions asked for hozier so; like real people do by hozier
20. a song from the soundtrack of a film that you like so much after the film finished you immediately looked for it:
sugar man by rodríguez (and the entire cold fact album).
#✉️ : asks#shahwol#u r so nice !!<3#i couldnt think of many but i hope you listen to them!!#if u want to :]
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OP DAMNIT!!!! UR LUCKY I LUV BOTH SONGS!!!!
everything is never as it seems
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So long story short I was a really big fan of bts for awhile but I got bored of them when boy with luv came out, didn’t listen to it that much but it grew on me. Tonight my mom called me into her room bc bts was on James Corden and it made me realize that idk I’ve kinda felt empty without them. The point of this: I don’t really like one of the members. I don’t wanna say because I know the backlash for this member would be awful. I don’t know what to do bc I always hear Stan one of none. Plz help
holy shit i never thought that i can get an ask like this and i dont even know if im the right person or can explain properly dhdjdjdd but im gonna just say my thoughts ok? maybe they will help u maybe they wont we r all different and need different approaches right
to me personally the idea of ‘stan ot7’ is a whole realization that everything matters and without 7 members/fans/some dumb shit/whatever happened good or bad there wouldnt be bts we know and that member u may not like is also as huge part of this path as other members without this one member at some point there could not be bts at all its a short version of my thoughts
i dont wanna sound too loud or weird rn but every time people say ‘i read the lyrics and that song spoke to me oh it helped oh this song helped me to accept and love myself oh this song made me cry cuz this is the way i felt too this cured my depression this gave me strength etc’ if everything didnt happen the way it did (aka 7 members complicated path a lot of shit but also good things) there wouldnt be these comments from ppl all over the world there wouldnt be songs wouldnt be uh lets call them saved fans cuz as i saw many people discovered them when they felt really bad and their songs and lyrics and messages helped them
so about not liking one member
1 when i first discovered bts and watched my first mv (ok even before that and when i only saw one clip of bts randomly without knowing them) i had a bias already and he made me dig a little deeper and when i decided to have a blog on tumblr at first i was following only blogs about this member and no one else and thought meh i only liked him why should i follow someone else related blogs rn 🤷♂️ and i didnt know how the whole kpop wolrd worked at that time lol
2 after some time i got used to them but felt a little strange about couple members i just couldnt get them i was puzzled and careful
3 after some more time i watched a lot of content i read some things and oK i got a whole ass knowledge (idk how many months passed) about every member and i remember having a ‘oh my god i love him so much hes such an amazing human being and makes my heart melt’ thingy with every memberrr at some point but it happened gradually
but in ur case u were a big fan as u say before idk for how long idk how old r u idk what kind of person r u so this may be a little harder
so what do i think about not liking one member
we all r very different and our surroundings r very different and our minds too and our preferences etc etc etc and if u think about it as not a kpop situation it would be normal right dhsjdj but we r here talking about kpop and it has some rules so,,, i will continue i personally tried to get to know those members a little more and better to understand them to know what do they feel and how do they treat others or how others treat these members and what r their roles etc and even if i didnt like some idk lets say ‘habits’ after some time i just accepted these ‘habits’ like a part of their personality u know? but yeah at this point i think of them as a family hdjdjdjd after stuff they have been through and how they all supported each other,,, idk its so precious to me its huge and important maybe im a lil oversensitive or empathic but i get it a little and appreciate that they became the way they r today ( while im writing all of this somehow THE EDINGING OF WE R BULLETPROOF ETERNAL KEEPS PLAYING IN MY HEAD AND IM ALMOST A SOBBING MESS) idk how it works but with bts u r breaking ur own principles and it makes sth inside of u expand and be more open minded and mentally flexible
but yO recently in their interviews they mentioned how hard it is ( i think it was hoseok i even took a screenshot oNE SEC) here it is
cr to op
so as u see its a normal thing and even they got used to each other after some time 🤷♂️ (i mean not from the beginning and they needed that t i m e to learn and grow up and accept etc) and ITS REALLY PRECIOUS THAT THEY R AT THIS POINT RN THAT THEY LOVE EACH OTHER SO MUCH it makes me think a lot about me and my friends and rethink some shit or the way i behave 😔
but wait was ur question ‘how do i accept the fact that everyone says love ot7 and i love ot6’ or ‘how do i love that seventh member’
ok about first question even tho i dont like solos etc even tho im ot7 i can say that people love to generalize anyway or love to attack or make assumptions so if u r not thinking anything bad about that member or not discrediting him and u r really realizing his huge role in their group and u just not a big fan of his ‘personality’ i think its not awful cuz we may not like some certain things in people and it happens esp irl with ppl 🤔 but if u r that type of ot6 like ‘ugh when will ______ quIT I H8TE HIM HES ABSOLUTELY POINTLESS’ its not good cuz well h8ing is the most self destructing thing lol and well wishing that someone should quit is also bad (and im saying this not from fans point of view) and should i even explain why
if its about second question hm u know after the beginning of this path of stanning bts and this fandom i faced many of my inner demons all of a sudden and after realizing whats the reason whats the source of those demons and after some work with them i felt a lot better and freer and relieved,, what if after accepting this seventh member and starting liking him too u will feel better too? what if its about having an inner conflict i really mean it think about ‘what do i not like about him/ why do i not like this or that/ is this that bad/ what if i liked ___ about him even tho i never liked this ever in my life/can i change the way i feel about it/ etc’ maybe u have this question in ur head rn cuz it meant to happen and u meant to work with ur inner state through this ?
i truly believe in few things 1 everything happens for the better (even tho realization can hit after many years) 2 everything happens in the best timing (for this thing! in ur life and u r ready for it) 3 if u dont like something and cant get rid of it just change ur reaction/perseption whatever that word is saying this from my own experience and there r more but dhhdhd
so at first just think about it if u need u can write it down somewhere it will help u to get to know urself better as well
ok maybe its not that deep but for quite some time whenever something bothers me i write it down to the notes starting from what happened what do i feel what exactly made me feel like this and why and what can i do to feel better
fr everyone can think of everything like ‘its not that deep’ but at the end of the day literally everything even little thing can help us with our mental state (after some work ofc) we better not underesetimate this world and things that happen to us 😔😔😔
also i wanna apologize for couple things english is not my first language so i tried my best but ofc there r typos and yes i dont have a habit of using punctuation i hope its not a big problem to u 😔
#SORRY IT TOOK MORE THAN ALMOST 1.5 HOURS IK#ask#id also love to say that its not about me treating such ‘simple’ things in this way#as i said it may be not that deep#but i decided to share my own experience#and it is really deeper even tho we may not think it is#everything that u like that surrounds u the way u think#its part of ur life#and u choose this path in particular#so i personally think#if sth bothers u#even such small things#u should think why#and thats why i wrote that whole write it down ask urself questions thingy#cuz it works like this with everything#it may not be about kpop it may be u about liking some art in particular or some way of behaviour or concepts of living#u know? u should listen to urself always#there r situations when others made us think/feel some type of way about sth and we feel conflicted after feeling it in another way#have u ever felt like this?#the most important thing is to listen to urself and not let others do this for u#yeah its more about how to live a life at this point#not about ‘i dont like one member what do i do’#i hope at least sth here will help u somehow 😔
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Have you seen anything about the new precure? Precure a la mode? ;3
Anonymous said to mothsbymoonlight: Hi there :) I know u like magical girls so I was wondering if you would like to share ur opinion on the design of the Cures of Kira Kira precure a la mode. Cause I fell in love with their creative designs. Check them out if u haven’t and have time to do so! Luv u :>
When I first saw leaks floating around I was seized by the fact the themes (animals, food, cafes) are similar to tokyo mew mew- Some people are mad about it but it just makes me biased honestly… fuckin love these food-nekomimi themed lil shits goddammit… lmfaooo…. send me right back to middle school smh
I adooored the squirrel (custard) and lion girl (gelato)’s designs immediately, and I love it when any precure season has a boyish girl on the team- even BETTER if you get two, as in this case with chocolat (wolf gal) and gelato!! Smile did this too with march and sunny, who I love to pieces. There’s a lot of fandom thirsting for macaron (catgirl) and chocolat to be a thing, and I’m trying not to get attached bc i’m tired of bein’ let down ya feel me haha -wheezes-
No idea what the plot will be like, the OP/ED songs aren’t my favorites, but I am delighted to see the fanart that comes outta this season >:3c show me the cute babs and ships i am ready
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