#oooooohhhhhhh

[teslathelame]

you might say crowdstrike got

crowdstruck

[okcoolthanks]

THERES A REASON THE STREET LINES ARE LIKE THAT IT ISNT JUST BECAUSE THEY RAN OUT OF PAINT??????

[humancosplay]

Who are you, so wise in the ways of the world

Impel Down is the reason they made Buggy hot in the live action

[merakiui]

it may be super freaking cold, but sampo can throw me on the snow and plow me away, or he can take me to a cabin - making it seem like an innocent trip - but it's actually a means to have his chance to fuck you senseless. <3333

YES YES YES UUWUWWAAAA....... orz the moment I saw him, I gasped and thought that this is a man who would have the most debilitating breeding kink. I may not have known Sampo for very long, but I think he has himbo energy. <3 ALSO HIS ULTIMATE????????? THE RIZZ????? The way that he's the type to slide all the way to you on his knees with a comically large bouquet of flowers and beg you to take him back after you've rejected him LOL. He does the absolute most because that's who he is and he adores you so, so much.

And Sampo fucking you in the snow or in a cabin... yeah. <3 after all, how can you distrust his handsome face? He's a sweetheart, right? You have to trust someone so kind, who calls you his dear friend and is always so nice to you. :) surely his ulterior motive isn't to have you all to himself in an isolated location so he can fuck you dumb. Definitely not. (but then it backfires because he gets pussy-drunk and you're cock-drunk, so it's a good match hehe!!)

[their-destinys-writer]

Akuma Flashpoint - Chapter 1

Art by @carolgpr (thank you so much again for this fantastic work)

Rated: M

Chapters: 1/?

Summary: It was over. Gabriel was in jail, the butterfly miraculous had been recovered, Emelie was in recovery and the heroes knew their identities. All that was left was the sentencing of Gabriel, and they could finally, after eight years of superhero work, close that chapter of their lives. But when Gabriel escapes for one last hurrah, and akuma, things didn't resolve quickly. One ill-timed wish warps reality around Marinette, and she suddenly finds herself in a world where nothing is right, and Hawkmoth is winning.

Canon compliant up to Season 3, Episode 'Ladybug'. Miracle Queen never happened. Canon divergent from that point forward, but might borrow a few details from later seasons. Very loosely inspired by DC's Flashpoint Paradox (the animated movie). Updates on the last Monday of every month.

Ao3 | Wattpad

A/N: I'm super happy to be sharing this story, finally! For the record, I already have up to Chapter 10 of this story written, so it's not one that's going to suddenly be abandoned. I already have the end of it and everything, and if I manage to get a few chapters further ahead, I might consider posting more than once a month. But that will depend on how it goes. Enjoy what I hope becomes a wild ride for your feelings!

Next

Distorted Reality

It was over. After years of fighting, of struggling with knowing the truth, it was finally over. Hawkmoth was defeated. But at a price.

Team Miraculous never had intentions of releasing Hawkmoth’s identity to the public. Ladybug gave him the chance to quietly return the butterfly miraculous and let him move on with his life. But Gabriel Agreste was tougher than the smell of dog excrement under a person’s shoe. Even after Nathalie betrayed him and Adrien begged him to give up, the man refused. And soon enough, law enforcement intervened.

Gabriel was then arrested and made to wait for the justice system to do its work.

It was a bittersweet ending for the team, but it didn’t stop them from having a small get-together the day before he was convicted. Everyone arrived at Marinette and Adrien’s apartment as a team, for what they hoped would be the last time. There were kwamis flying about. Teammates who had never interacted befriended each other. But for Adrien, it was inevitable to hear forms of condolences, as if he had lost his father.

“It’s not like he was ever there,” Adrien complained at the end of the night, when the most trusted team members where the only ones left sitting around a coffee table. “How can you lose someone you never actually had in the first place?”

“They’re just saying what they think is respectful,” Luka sighed, pulling back the few bangs that had fallen down his brushed back hair. “They don’t know what else to say, and they don’t want to be rude to you by saying what they really think.”

“I’m sure that whatever they think, I’ve already thought of it.” Adrien took a sip of his glass of wine.

“Yeah, well, they don’t know that,” Nino added, giving his best friend a light pat on the shoulder. “But what matters is that you know and helped put his stiff ass in jail.”

Adrien snorted.

“They have a point,” Marinette said, cozying up on his other side, holding a glass of her own with both hands. “Besides, we gave him a chance. It’s not your fault, or any of ours, that he didn’t take our offer.”

“Ridiculous,” Chloé said under her breath, before taking a swig of the bottle she was holding. “Utterly ridiculous.”

“How much of that have you had?” Alya asked, as she took the bottle from the blonde.

“Clearly, not enough, if I can still understand all of you.”

“Half of that bottle and two glasses earlier,” Kagami responded instead.

“Snitch,” Chloé scoffed. She tried stealing the bottle back, but Alya gave it to Nino to keep it away. She huffed before standing up and heading to the kitchen.

“I still can’t believe this is real,” Marinette sighed. “After eight years, I was starting to think we’d never get those miraculouses back.”

“Hear, hear.” Nino lifted the bottle.

“It’s only too bad he didn’t give it up willingly,” Adrien muttered, slightly sinking into the chair. “Would’ve been nice if he had shown at least one last shred of humanity before getting taken.”

“Screw your pops,” Nino said after taking a mouthful of wine. “He doesn’t deserve your pity or good wishes. You said it yourself when we found out his identity. The dude’s irredeemable.”

“Alya—”

“Got it.” Said woman pried the bottle away from her fiancé.

“Hey, I’m not Chloé level buzzed yet,” he complained, beanie slightly askew.

“Pah-lease,” the blonde in question said as she entered the room with a new bottle. “You wish you had my alcohol tolerance.”

As if the universe wanted to contradict her statement, Chloé missed the sofa by an inch, her butt falling to the carpet instead. She cleared her throat and wiggled about, trying to play it off as if planned.

“Smooth,” Luka commented.

Kagami, on the other hand, rolled her eyes as she got up from her chair and took the new bottle away. Chloé protested, but her drunken state made her a pathetic fighter.

“The hearing is in less than twenty-four hours,” Kagami stated. “Do you all plan on being hungover tomorrow?”

“Maybe,” Nino shrugged.

“Guys, Kagami’s right,” Alya said dejectedly, placing her own glass on the coffee table. “We gotta be responsible for one more night. Marinette, I expected better from you.”

Marinette gasped. “How dare you. I’ve only had two glasses—”

“Two and a half,” Adrien corrected.

“Shh.” He chuckled at her antics. “I am the most responsible woman in this group. I am Ladybug: Queen of responsibility.”

“Until you become Lady Noire: Lady of puns.”

“You’re supposed to be on my side!”

“I’m on the side of truth tonight. That’s Kagami’s.”

“Traitor.”

The rest of the group groaned as Marinette and Adrien playfully bickered. Although they were used to it, Marinette knew it was still slightly annoying for them. But she didn’t care. She enjoyed these moments with Adrien. It reminded her of all the reasons she said yes to his proposal. Of why she had moved in with him and often imagined just running off to city hall, instead of waiting for the wedding they were planning.

“I swear, if you two don’t stop—”

But Nino didn’t get to finish his sentence. There was a sudden collective emergency alarm resounding around the room, coming from all their phones. A sound that had not been heard for three months already. Everyone quietly checked their notifications, hoping that it was not what they thought it was. Only to be sorely disappointed.

“You’ve gotta be kidding me,” Adrien breathed.

Kagami was the first standing to grab the remote. When the television turned on, they were immediately greeted by Nadja Chamack on the streets, reporting their worst fear.

“Police suspect that Agreste had help in his escape from prison. Unfortunately, they’ve yet to find his whereabouts at this moment. In the meantime, an akuma calling herself The Genie has been terrorizing the city, demanding Ladybug and Chat Noir’s miraculouses—”

“TIKKI!” Marinette called towards the kitchen. It only took a second for seven kwamis to zip into the living room.

“We heard!” Tikki said, worried. “We have to stop and find him!”

“Wait!” Chloé intervened, struggling to stand up. “How are we supposed to stop him when we’re in this state?!”

“I’m-hic-with Chloé,” Nino hiccupped.

“Just when you think it’s safe to drink,” Adrien lamented.

“Okay, who drank the least?” Marinette asked. Kagami, Luka and Alya raised their hands. “Okay, you three and I will go on ahead. Adrien, you get these two something to lower the buzz and come as soon as you’re ready.”

“You really think that’s safe?”

“We have to move before he gets away,” Marinette reasoned. “We don’t have time to waste.”

Adrien’s features hardened, as he nodded in understanding. Several magic phrases later, Ladybug, Rena Rouge, Ryuko and Viperion were running through the balcony doors and jumping over the rooftops. After several blocks, they arrived at the source of the commotion.

From their vantage point on top of a building, what they saw could only be described as bizarre. Some people were running away from what looked like giant versions of cute things, like dogs, cats, hamsters, and a snake. Others seemed to be… happy crying? That, while holding either objects or people.

“I don’t understand,” Ryuko muttered, her eyes scanning across the street.

“Talk about weird,” Rena Rouge agreed.

“What’s our move, Boss?” Viperion turned to Ladybug.

“We need to find the akuma first. Let’s split up, and whomever finds it first, call the rest.”

The team nodded, immediately running to separate directions. Ladybug, on the other hand, couldn’t help but search in the direction of Master Fu’s massage parlor: where they had last seen the butterfly miraculous. She had to know if the old guardian was okay, if Gabriel hurt him in any way to get the miraculous back.

When she entered the building where his parlor was, the first thing she noticed was how the door was ajar. Ladybug took a deep breath, holding to her yoyo tightly as she neared the entrance. She slowly exhaled.

BAM

Ladybug kicked the door fully open, just as it was illuminated by lightning from the window. The place was a mess. There was dirt everywhere from the plants. But most importantly to her, at that time, was the small old man unconscious on the ground.

“Master Fu!” Ladybug slid to her knees and took him in her arms. There was a drip of blood flowing from his temple, seeming to be caused by a blunt object. “Please, wake up. Master!”

There was a low groan, allowing Ladybug to release a breath of relief.

“The box,” he croaked.

The superheroine frowned, her eyes quickly scanning the room. While the phonograph was splayed across the floor in two pieces, the compartment containing the miracle box seemed intact.

“The box is fine. Whoever did this didn’t—”

“No.” Master Fu started checking his pockets. “The box. With the butterfly miraculous. It’s gone. Nooroo is gone.”

It was true then. It really was Hawkmoth out there. Whoever broke in must’ve entered when Master Fu was in the middle of one of his therapy sessions with Nooroo. The poor little thing had been through so much.

“Do you remember who did this?” she asked. “Was it Gabriel?”

“I don’t—I don’t remember,” the old man said groggily. “I can’t think straight.”

Ladybug immediately opened her communicator and called emergency services, giving the address they needed to send an ambulance. While they waited, she took several blankets to rest his head. She looked around the room, hoping to find any clues on the perpetrator.

Had it been Gabriel, or whoever broke him out of jail? Or both? Who could have such a connection with him to want him free? It couldn’t be Nathalie. She had left for Tibet once her testimony was given to the authorities. She was in charge of overseeing Emelie’s recovery in the Guardians Temple, thus had no reason to help Gabriel.

Neither Mrs. Bourgeois nor Mrs. Tsurugi wanted anything to do with them, much less when they knew it could damage the strained relationships they already had with their daughters. The Gabriel company cut all ties with him, and none of his employees remained loyal. Who else knew him well enough to feel sympathy for him?

* * *

Ladybug was back swinging on the rooftops during light rain, after the ambulance took Master Fu to the hospital. Normally she would have gone with him, but Mr. Raincomprix of the Police Department promised to have guards keeping an eye on him. So, for the moment, Master Fu would be under the authorities care.

With one less problem to worry about, Ladybug was able to go back into the real battle. Following the tracking device in her communicator, she ran towards her team’s signals as fast as she could. She jumped down the building right next to Rena Rouge’s mark.

“I’m here!” she announced, turning to the fox heroine. “What’s the…status.”

Where a superheroine was supposed to be standing, instead there was a woman in a big, puffy wedding dress. Fighting off small dinosaurs.

“This is ridiculous!” Rena Rouge complained, using a bouquet as if it was her flute. Petals flying everywhere. “Let,” swing, “me,” swing, “pass!”

Without skipping a beat, Ladybug used her yoyo to beat away the little critters. Meanwhile, Rena Rouge growled, as she tried to lift her pompous skirt.

“This akuma is annoying,” she said through gritted teeth.

“How did this happen?” Ladybug placed her weapon back on her waist.

“The Genie happened,” Rena huffed, kicking off a pair of high heels. “She showed up, and all she did was look at me and say: Your wish is my command. Next thing I know, I’m walking around in this.”

She gestured towards the dress. Ladybug tapped her lips with a finger.

“So, she probably grants wishes,” she thought out loud. “We need to find Ryuko and Viperion.”

“I think they were around the corner.”

With a nod, the two women ran in the direction they hoped their teammates would be. However, just as they turned the corner, several large toys invaded their path. Before Ladybug could do anything, they took Rena Rouge, yelling ‘Our Princess’ over and over. Ladybug was about to go after them, when she heard Viperion’s distinctive voice yelling reassurances.

She turned to see Ryuko floating upwards, as Viperion did his best to keep her grounded.

“Don’t let go, Viperion!” Ryuko yelled.

“I swear, I won’t!”

“I will kick your ass if you do!”

“I know!”

“What the hell is going on?” The voice of Chat Noir said beside her. Although she was relieved to hear his voice, her attention was on the floating heroine.

“They’re…getting wishes granted,” Ladybug answered absentmindedly, her head tilting.

“Ryuko wanted to float?”

Ladybug squinted.

“With her powers, that doesn’t make sense,” she thought out loud. She placed a hand on her chin. “Maybe it’s about how—”

“LOOK OUT!”

Chat Noir slammed his body against hers, sending them both several feet away from a dog shooting lasers out of their eyes.

“Why would anyone want a dog who shoots lasers?!” Ladybug yelped.

“Some kid out there has been watching too many cartoons,” Chat Noir commented.

“You okay, dudes?” Carapace’s voice said from above. Ladybug looked up, but instead of wearing the green hoodie outfit, he was dressed in a tuxedo of the same color.

“What happened to you?” she asked.

“Dunno,” he shrugged. “I was on my way here, and next thing I know, I’m dressed like I’m going to my wedding.”

“Wedding?” Ladybug scanned the area for Rena Rouge. It seemed she had gotten away from the giant toys and was now still trying to fight in the orange wedding dress, the bouquet looking more like a bunch of dying weeds. She looked back at Ryuko. And then back to Carapace. Her eyes widened. “The akuma is called Genie, right?”

“Yeah?” the men said in unison.

“And we can assume her power is granting wishes, right?”

“What are you getting at?” Carapace frowned.

“I don’t think Ryuko wished to float, and I’m a hundred percent sure the last thing Rena wants is to get married during a battle.”

“Meaning…?” Chat Noir squinted.

“We have to be careful what we wish for,” Ladybug concluded. “We can’t wish for anything. Not even in our minds, just in case.”

“Sounds simple enough,” Carapace shrugged.

“That’s what you think,” a voice behind them said.

In an instant, Ladybug and Chat Noir rose to their feet, making a battle pose. In front of them was what looked like a character from the animated Aladdin movie. Her skin was completely blue, and she wore a bustier with baggy pants. Her nose and mouth were covered by a belly dancer veil. Only her purple eyes were clearly visible under her bangs.

“I’m not a pushover, like other champions,” The Genie declared, slowly pulling her arms back. “I will get what I wish for, and not even you will stop me.”

“Isn’t there a rule that genies can’t grant wishes for themselves?” Chat Noir quipped.

“But I’m not a regular genie, now am I?” the villain then rested an elbow on her hand, fingers under her chin. “Once I have your miraculouses, I can get any wish a genie could want.”

“Miraculous wish?” Ladybug parroted. She and Chat Noir exchanged gazes, hoping they hadn’t arrived at the same hypothesis. Before they could say anything else, Carapace had placed a hand on her bicep.

“You’re not making any sense,” he said. Ladybug frowned, but noticed his eyes glimpsed to somewhere behind Genie. “I still don’t understand how your wish could come true with the two miraculouses.”

“It really isn’t clear,” she joined, trying not to give away Queen Bee sneaking behind the villain, ready to strike Venom.

“I think you’ve been given some false promises there, Genie,” Chat Noir mocked, using his staff like a cane and leaning forward on it.

“Hmph.” Genie closed her eyes. “You really think I’m that stupid.”

With a split-second movement, Genie was facing the other way, squeezing Queen Bee’s wrist. The superheroine screamed in pain, her weapon clattering on the floor.

“Bee!” Ladybug, Chat Noir and Carapace shouted in unison, as they ran to her aid. However, before they could get to her, Genie swung her towards them. All four landed painfully on the ground, as the villain vanished in swirling smoke.

“Where did she go?!” Ladybug panted, sitting up. Not a second later, a chilling laugh echoed in the air, with no point of origin.

“Bug,” Queen Bee grunted. “I think she broke my wrist.”

“That’s not good,” Chat Noir whispered, taking off his belt to wrap it around the injury.

“I can’t remember the last time one of use got seriously hurt in an attack,” Carapace commented, holding Queen Bee’s arm steady through her hissing.

“I shouldn’t have asked you two to come,” Ladybug lamented. “Not only are we a little rusty, but we’re clearly not in condition to be fighting.”

“This was my choice,” Queen Bee retorted, burning her eyes on their leader. “We had won. I am not letting stupid Gabriel get away with this. Not after everything we’ve been through. After everything we achieved. Everything I achieved…”

Ladybug’s face fell. “Chloé,” she said quietly, placing a hand on the blonde’s shoulder, “He’s not getting away with it. We beat him once. We can do it again.” She looked at Carapace. “Keep her safe, while Chat and I go after Genie.”

“Sure thing, Ma’am,” Carapace nodded, placing an arm around Queen Bee. “Kick that akuma’s ass for me.”

“Aye, aye, sir.” Chat Noir gave his best friend a two-fingered salute.

The original duo stood up and walked together to the middle of the street, where they stood back to back. Alert, waiting to see where Genie would show up.

“Just like old times, huh?” Chat Noir commented, loud enough for his fiancé to hear.

“Don’t we always say that, every time it’s just the two of us again?” Ladybug quipped back, while scanning the area.

“And it never gets old, Bugaboo.”

Ladybug chuckled. “You always know how to break the tension, Chaton.”

“One of my many talents.”

“ENOUGH!” A voice echoed angrily in the air. There was a puff of blue smoke, and the next thing they knew, both were sent flying in opposite directions.

Ladybug landed hard on the concrete. Suddenly very thankful that the suit protected her from scrapping any skin against it. She raised her head, to see Genie standing where she and Chat Noir had been only a moment ago. On the other side of the street was her partner, almost on his feet.

Unfortunately, the second he was up, Genie disappeared from where she was, to reappear right behind him.

“Chat Noir!” Ladybug yelled. But it didn’t matter. He still got hit on the back of the head, with enough force to make him fall on his knees. Genie raised her arm again, but Ladybug swung and wrapped her yoyo just in time to stop her.

Gotcha, she thought triumphantly.

Genie’s head snapped towards Ladybug, sending a chill down her spine. Nevertheless, she kept her grip firm on the yoyo. The problem was that so did Genie. The villain grabbed the string and started pulling on it. Meanwhile, Ladybug did her best to stand her ground, but the akuma was surprisingly strong.

“Come here, Little Bug,” Genie hissed as she yanked the string hard enough to drag Ladybug several meters forward.

The superheroine gritted her teeth as she attempted to do the same to the akuma. With little success, only managing to anchor her feet where she was.

“You’re so annoying,” Genie huffed.

The next second, she was gone again, making Ladybug fall backwards. Chat Noir had regained his balance enough to run to her side, to make sure she was all right. He had just helped her back to her feet, when she was pulled back as if from an invisible rope around her stomach. Once again, sent flying across the street.

“Why don’t you fight us head on, you coward?!” Chat Noir yelled, any trace of playfulness gone.

A chilling chuckle resounded in the air.

“As you wish, pretty boy,” the disembodied voice of Genie said.

There was another puff of blue smoke, and the villain hit his chin upwards with the palm of her hand. Chat Noir staggered backwards, attempting to raise his staff. The next blow he managed to block with is weapon, but Genie immediately followed it with a hard kick to his stomach.

All the while, Ladybug slowly stood up, trying her best to ignore the pain on her ribs. This akuma was of the kind they rarely ever saw. It was almost like she had purposely allowed herself to be akumatized. Much like Catalyst on the first Heroes Day.

If there was anything she had learned from these type of akumas, it was that they were far more powerful than the regular brand. Mainly, because they weren’t aimless. Not only was their goal clear, but they collaborated with Hawkmoth to create a more coherent plan.

Ladybug breathed heavily, her arm over her torso. She looked around at her incapacitated team. Viperion had even turned back to Luka, for his five minutes were wasted as he kept his hold on Ryuko. How did it get this bad so fast? And why did it have to be Adrien fighting his father once again?

She could see it in Chat Noir’s eyes. Yes, he made jokes and insulted his father all the time, but he was still hurting. And at that very moment, his heart was simply not in it, if the way he was fighting was anything to go by. Why couldn’t Adrien be freed of such pain?

Genie puffed out again, to appear right in front of Ladybug. The heroine didn’t even get a chance to move, before a hand grabbed her neck and pushed her into the wall. Ladybug struggled, trying to both focus on the villain and on freeing herself.

“You’re so predictable,” Genie whispered, with a menacing grin.

Ladybug could feel her consciousness wavering, as her eyes focused on the glowing necklace on Genie’s chest.

“You’re wish is my command, Little Bug.”

And there was a glowing purple light…

* * *

Marinette’s eyes snapped open. Above her was a plain, white ceiling she didn’t recognize. With a gasp, she bolted into a sitting position. She gazed around the room, still not recognizing anything of it.

There was a desk topped with fabrics, a mannequin with several hats on it, papers scattered on the ground, a floor length mirror. And she was lying on a full-sized bed she didn’t recognize. Marinette shuffled out of the bed towards the mirror, hoping she hadn’t been transferred to someone else’s body.

To her relief, she was still her. And yet…not. Her hair was much longer than she originally had it. Gone was the pixie cut and now her hair almost reached her waist. Under her eyes were heavy bags she hadn’t seen in a long while. Like she hadn’t slept in days.

But what struck her most were the scars around her bare arms. When did she get those? Did she have them all over her body? Marinette dared to lift the shirt from her stomach, to see three more scars. As if leftovers of a battle.

From the reflection, she saw something move behind her. Marinette snapped her neck towards it, luckily to see a familiar little blob of red burying herself in the fabrics over the desk.

“Tikki,” she whispered called, scurrying towards the kwami. “Tikki! Wake up!”

“Shh,” the small being said.

Marinette’s brows furrowed. It wasn’t like Tikki to be lazy. With gruntled determination, the woman poked her little friend, calling her again.

“No,” Tikki responded.

“This is important,” Marinette whisper-yelled. “Something is really wrong, and I need your help to figure it out.”

“Talk to the tail,” Tikki mumbled, turning enough to point her tiny butt towards her charge.

Marinette gaped. “Since when are you this rude?”

“Since when do you not let me sleep in?”

“Are you really Tikki?”

“How much did you drink last night?” The kwami snapped back.

“You know very well I only had two glasses and a half.”

“And you know very well that I wasn’t there!” Tikki finally turned to Marinette, her eyes with a fury she had never seen.

“What are you talking about?” she said. “You were all in the kitchen. You were there when I divided up the team before going out to fight.”

Tikki looked at her like she had grown a second head.

“You’ve finally lost it.” With that, she turned and collapsed in the fabrics.

“Lost what?! I have no idea what’s going on or—” Marinette’s eyes widened. “Adrien.”

“Wait, what?”

“Of course!” The woman rummaged through the room until she found a cellphone, a jacket and a pair of pink flats to wear. “I need to find Adrien. I need to know if he’s okay, what happened to him, if Plagg is acting the same way—”

“Plagg?!”

“—maybe he’ll have answers. Hopefully he remembers what happened last night, when we fought The Genie.”

Ignoring Tikki’s sudden interest, Marinette yanked the door open and crossed what seemed to be a small living room to get to what she hoped would be the exit. Once in the hallway, she started inspecting the phone that luckily had no lock.

“Ugh.” She grimaced at the background picture of a ridiculously revealing dress. “Whosever phone this is, they have terrible taste in clothes.”

Marinette continued tapping on the screen, ignoring a mutter from Tikki nearby about the phone. Looking into the contacts, she had to admit surprise when she saw Alya almost at the top of the list. Without waiting any second longer, she called the number.

Once. Twice. Three times. No answer.

“Dammit.” The voicemail came through the speaker. “Hey, Alya, it’s Marinette. I need you to call me to this number as soon as you can. Something very weird happened. Call me back, please!”

She hung up and continued scrolling through the contacts.

“Huh.” She tilted her head. “This phone is the same model as my old one.”

“You’ve had that phone for three years already,” Tikki said loudly. Marinette stopped on her tracks. She glanced at the kwami peering from under the jacket, and back at the phone.

“You’re not making any sense,” she resorted to say.

Yet her mind started racing as she ran down the stairs. The phone was clearly not hers, if it didn’t have the background picture of Adrien and her on their engagement party. Then again, things had been pretty bizarre already that morning.

Once in the ground floor, Marinette powerwalked towards the exit. Hopefully, she would find some answers once she stepped out of that door.

However, it wasn’t much help.

Stepping into the blinding sunlight, Marinette only realized she was an arrondissement away from her apartment. She was suddenly tempted to transform, to reach her home faster. But with Tikki’s mood, perhaps it was best to walk.

As the woman marched, she scanned her surroundings. From the looks of it, there was no sign of The Genie. As if it had never happened. No giant pets, no reanimated toys, nothing strange at all. She checked the phone again, which was very unhelpful when it barely had any contacts. Tikki said it was her phone, so if that was the case: where were Nino and Chloé? Was it even safe to try other numbers?

Marinette sighed, her head starting to hurt. Just as she looked up, she noticed a blond mop of hair she would recognize anywhere.

“Oh my gosh!” she breathed, breaking into a run, eyes trained on the man exiting a café. “ADRIEN!” she yelled.

Said man raised his head in bewilderment, almost apprehensive. She called several more times until he looked to her direction.

“Marinette?” He barely said her name, when she threw her arms around his neck, almost making him drop the brown bag in his hand.

“Adrien!” Marinette sighed in relief. “Thank goodness, I was worried something may have happened to you.”

“What?” the man questioned, brows furrowing.

“I’ve been so worried, and so confused,” she pulled back, grabbing on to his biceps. “I woke up this morning and I was in a strange apartment, and you weren’t there, and Tikki wasn’t talking to me, and I couldn’t get a hold of Alya, Nino or Chloé, and everything feels weird, and—”

“What are you doing?” Adrien cut in, shrugging his arms away from her. “Did you hit your head or something?”

“Huh?” Marinette frowned. “W-well… I don’t know! Adrien, nothing feels—”

“Why are you talking to me?” he snapped when her hand had reached out again.

The woman slowly straightened, staring at her fiancé dumbfounded.

“Chaton?”

“Chaton?” Adrien parroted. “You really have lost it now, haven’t you?”

“What are you talking about?”

“What are you talking about?” Adrien rolled his eyes, before checking his watch. “Look, I don’t have time for this, I have things to do. So, if you’ll excuse me—”

“Wait, no!” Marinette grabbed his wrist desperately, only for him to roughly shake it off.

“Listen here,” he said, pointing at her menacingly. “I swear that if you come at me like this again, I will be forced to get a restraining order—”

“Restraining order?!”

 “—against you. I don’t want to, but you know very well I can’t be seen with you. Or do you forget I’m a public figure?”

“Why are you threatening me? Are you under an akuma spell?”

“Marinette, it’s been two years!” he shouted, rendering her quiet. He let out a defeated sigh. “And here I thought we were past this. Just… I’m with Lila now, so just deal with it.”

Without a second look, he walked past her shell-shocked form. The words slugging through her mind, wondering whether they had been real or not. Two years? Two years of what?! Since when would Adrien threaten her with a restraining order? Since when does he not recognize his own nickname?

But most importantly… Since when were they not together?

---

Next

[hum-suffer]

I went from Ranjish hi Sahi to Take Me To Church and I'll go back to Jab Koi Baat Bigad Jaye and back to Wanna Be Yours and back again to Kali Kali Zulfon Ke Phande

[dustorange]

I was surprised to see heaven in your eyes…………………….

[funkbeat]

^ seeing people i want to commission to draw my squid is making me feel like this

[icarusredwings]

For the lovely person in the tags <3 You get it. @banneriscarried

It's 8 am. Here recently, it was normal for Logan to be up before either of his room mates, the second the sun shown in on his face from the couch was the moment he was up and he couldn't sleep until Althea was asleep too.

Maybe it was the way he was raised. Maybe it was the fact he's been used as a soldier as far back as he could remember (ironically seeing as he didn't take orders) but if you payed attention, you always noticed him near that old woman. Like a grandson worried about his grannies health. Fetching her medicine, water, refusing to get her coke bag, giving her the newer pillow to sit on, etc. This was all mindlessy done, might I add. He seeked no validation nor reward, because at the end of the day, he did what was right, not out of morals (these were far proven to be broken for him) rather then what was kind. It was as simple as bringing her the plate that Wade prepared for them during dinner to passing her the remote when she reached her hand to feel around for it.

At 10, he had shrugged off the fact he still wasn't up, having made Althea and him cereal for breakfast. Oh, well. It was like Wade to skip the first meal. Something about making him nauseated?

But now, at noon, his eyes lingered more and more on the doorway that led to the single bedroom, staring off as he mentally waved a hand. Bah. Wade would get up when he wanted. Besides. It wasn't THAT late, nor was it a big deal. And he DID just get back from that job only yesterday.

Quickly, noon became 3:30 as he now was standing a little longer by the hallway than he should when getting himself a drink, subconsciously grabbing two. Blinking, he shook his head, bringing a soda to the woman who didn't need to see to hear his heavy steps and corresponding grunts of thought.

"I wouldn't if I were you."

"Huh? Wouldn't what?"

"Don't play coy with me, boy. You know what."

Tilting his head, he thought for a second, not sure what she meant by that.

"He gets grumpy." She says as suddenly he understands.

"Oh.. No I just-"

"You've hesitated by that corridor 4 times already."

"How would you know that?"

"Im blind, Not deaf."

"And?" He scoffed.

"And! You're loud as hell!" She told him, reminding him that the floor always creaked a certain way depending on who was walking around.

"Mmh..." Getting up, he began to take his drink to the room.

"That's what I thought." She mumbled. Al might have been a coke addict but she wasn't stupid.

With each step he took, he could smell weird things, something he wasn't quite sure of. He could smell the sweat, fear and something he couldn't quite pin point. A scent he ussually just marked as 'Wade' in his mental files but now it was much stronger. A lot stronger.

"Wade?" He asked, softly knocking. Waitng a moment, he opened the door when there was no awnser. There, in the bed, was the man curled up in an old T and fluffy jammie pants that he had cut into shorts after the bottoms were "ruined by not-my-blood", Shivering. Shaking. Sweating. Twitching in some bits of his body.

For a moment, he took in the sight, trying to assess the situation, setting the can on the dresser. ".. Wade?" He asked, firstly checking his arms. Or at least tried. The instant they were touched, he flinched and pulled them close to his chest, still shivering. Glancing over, The AC was completely off but it did look like he had kicked off his blanket.

"Wade." He said a third time, trying to turn him over only for the man to practically jump.

"W-what!?" He snapped, though the end trailed off more into a whimper. There was that smell again. The fear. The sweat. He was soaking the sheet. He couldn't get sick.. could he?

"..Are you okay?"

"Does it look like im okay?"

"...Wade...Are you withdrawling?" He was just checking off the boxes of possibilities. Actually, a bit of heroin might do him some good. Or Adderall. Though they were bassically the same thing.

"What?! Go away! Just.. leave me alone."

Without even grabbing for the blanket, he turned over, hugging himself tight, curling into a ball. Cold.

"Do you want your- Ah ew-" he gruted, trying to pick up the blanket, discovering that the reason he pushed it off was because he vomited on it. Now he was really worried.

"Do you want a drink? I brought you a coke.. erm- the drink. N-not the drug."

(Joke stolen from @monkepenguin )

But he was already passed out again.

"Wade??"

He was completely unconscious. Just like that. But how so quickly? Maybe he was sick?? Perhaps some asshole coughed on him on that mission? No- they were borderline immune to all of that. You had to have specially modified diseases for them, and he doubted he'd ever come home knowingly with a disease knowing how high risk Al was.

Sighing, He came to the closet, getting out a spare blanket and some sweat pants. But wait- should he put sweat pants on him if he was already sweating to death?

Seeing how hard he was shaking made him frown. He looked miserable. Whatever was going on, He didn't like it. And whatever that smell was (that wasn't vomit) stunk in this room, particularly the closer he stepped towards him. What was it?

Maybe it was the illness? Ah, well. If it really was an illness, he needed to sweat it out, but he needed to keep the room sterile.

"Alright, bub. Don't get any ideas. This is strictly for medical reasons. Got it?" He muttered. When there were no jokes about rectal exams or sexy nurses, he took this as an 'Uhh do what ever you want, I'm super dead', moving to put the pants on over top of the shorts.

Immediately, he tried to kick him, and hard from the looks of it, watching how quickly he backed up and the look he gave him was sheer confusion and irratation mixed with terror, as if his mind wasn't functioning enough to tell who he was.

Logan of all people knew how it was to be woken when your brain wasn't - or couldn't - process what was going on. A lot of people have gotten stabbed for touching him while sleeping, so he took no offense to this what so ever.

Watching him proceed to curl up agaisnt the corner of the bed and the wall made him swallow, a string tugging his heart. Ohh.... this was bad. Really bad.

"Get the hell off of me!! I already said leave me alone!"

Tossing the blanket on top of him, a small mumble of 'Ill fucking stab you. I will..' came from under it, but was slower and distorted as if he was sleep talking. Was this a bad nightmare? They've never been this bad before. Not that he's seen anyway.

Leaving the drink, he brought the puke blanket to the dirty hamper, making his way to Al.

"You said he gets grumpy. That's not grumpy. That's a cranky toddler who hasn't slept in 3 days, and he's sweating himself to death."

"I told you."

"So whats wrong with him?"

"Same thing that has been wrong with him since I've known him."

"Which is?? These are not mental symptoms. They're physical."

"Oh sweet boy. What do you think chemotherapy and radiation do to you? You can't honestly think he was born this batshit insane do you?"

"...but I thought." If it wasn't for his patches, Logan would forget that he was stage 4. He didn't show it. Barley at all.

"It's still killing him. Just about as slowly as time is killing me, though."

"But he regenerates.."

"And how much of a toll do you think that takes on him, hm? See you don't get it. You're nice, young, and healthy."

"I'm older than you." He muttered quietly but understood her point. Maybe that's why they got along so well. Because Wade had similar issues to an older person. Either that or he thought she was funny. Perhaps that was the only reason he litsened to her.

"So what do I do?" He asked, not sure how this stuff worked.

"Nothing. Just wait. Even if you found a cure for cancer, he'd still die." She mumbled, petting the sleeping dog in her lap.

"There's got to be something I can do. Anything?" The frustration in his voice made her smile.

"You can make him happy until that son of a bitch death finally comes to collect his dues." She whispered, in a serious yet calming tone that made Logan want to hit her for making him feel emotions he didn't understand.

Hearing him huff and walk off, She petted the dog. "I don't know why you make that idiot so happy, but you better wait until after I die because i'm not litsening to that poor boy cry his eyes out when you're gone. Got it?" Al whispered as the dog wagged its tail, waking up just enough to lick her hand.

I wish I could say the same was going as easy for Logan, who has turned on the AC (after googling that Cancer patiants should probably be kept in cold rooms, but kept warm) and now was crawled into the bed too, pulling him close.

"Let go!" He started but was held until he clonked out again a good 7 seconds later, the resisting and pushing of his chest soon becoming the place for him to rest his drooly head on. It didn't take much for Wade to process 2 things. That A. This man had some awesome tits. And B. These tits were warm. And as a cold person with little ability to retain his own body heat at the moment from the rapid level of dying and regenerating cells within his body, heat was good.

So here he was. At 4:15 pm on a Tuesday. Cuddled up with a man who was both dying and agonizingly surviving, letting him nuzzle himself as close and as deep into his neck that he possibly could, going as far as putting his cold hands under his tank top.

"Aye, watch it, bub. Cancer or not, I'll still kick your ass."

The tiny scoff of a chuckle that came from him was enough for the big manly mans act to drop, a small smile coming to his scruffy face as he held him, the warmth helping him come back to the living world and sleep soundly, instead of shaking.

It wasn't until 8: 37 pm that night when Wade was finally conscious again, now teasing him.

"I can't believe you just let me grope you for 4 hours! I should get violently ill more often!"

"Shut up! Next time, I'll just let you freeze!"

"Oh suuree pal. As if you weren't totally snoring too."

"You were asleep! How would you know?!"

"Oh please, I wasn't asleep that whole time."

"Why you-!"

"Ah ah ah!" He says, putting up his arms. "Cancer!"

"Don't care!" He grumbled, slapping him upside the head, a soft, embaressed blush over his cheeks. God.. this man would be the death of him.. and honestly? That might not be that bad..

"Ow!"

Thinking about Logan getting really worried when Wade's (metaphorical) mask comes off and he's not the guy dancing on the bar, making boob jokes and kicking people in the face but rather the one with his face in the toilet at the club, promising he's okay while still struggling with the side effects that come with cancer.

"No no, really its fine! Go on, go have fun ill be out in a second!"

And being the emotionally closed off manly man that Logan is, doesn't press about it but still waits outside by the door, not letting people in the bathroom, ending up causing a bar fight because hed rather get punched in the jaw then let someone see Wade like that and embaress him.

Thinking about him coming home with groceries and finding him dead asleep on the couch, but the kind of sleep that looks like it was taken by force rather than comfy. The kind where you pass out because your body has had enough and just coming to check on him every couple of minutes before eventually sitting next to him and just waits until he wakes up.

Al can't see. But she's had a smug look on her face ever since Logan has walked in the door because she can hear him walking back and forth to go check on her room mate.

"You're really worried about him, ain't you?"

"What?"

"He's fine, you know. He does that. Go on. Go do what ever it was you angry men do."

But he doesn't go. He stays put. Like a loyal dog at his owners death bed, hoping if he stares enough, he'll get better. Eventually, he falls asleep too And Al is going to tease them both about this for the next month. She took photos to prove it.

Soon enough, it evolves into him picking up tasks so that Wade can rest but refuses to tell him why. He doesn't want to embarrass him and make it feel like a big deal.

"Alright. Well, I'm gonna go walk mary puppins. You want anything from the bodega?"

"No.. actually.. could I walk her? I can take her. Being in this apartment is killing me."

"What need to get your steps in or something?"

"Something like that."

"Ah I get it. Wild cat needs to prowl. Well alright. But dont be taking our baby to any skanks house! Shes too innocent!"

[etoilelafleur]

*Adam Driver voice*

EVERY DAY I WAKE UP AND I’M NOT A FUCKING AMERICAN GIRL LIVING IN THE BIBLE BELT DEEP SOUHTH WITH EXTREME RELIGIOUS FEAR!!!!!!

*Slams my fucking fists against my wardrobe and cries*

[theyzilla]

idk how you can enjoy green/yellowish bananas when the beautiful amazing extraordinary brown mushy sweet banana is right there

[skenpiel]

watching the last season of breaking bad is like psychological torture. i have never hated a fictional character as much as i do now

[charlesmars]

*doesn't look up from the laptop as he clicks away*

I think we have an hour... Well, 58 minutes now.

*walking along the treeline, not using his cane*

*his hand slightly out in front of him, his fingers moving slightly every so often*

@voiceinthemidstofthefourbeasts

[newfoundgrxce]

idk if I’ll be able to listen to the new one lol

[theshitpostcalligrapher]

req'd by @fruitytomato

OOOOOOHHHHHHH

text: Death only happens once you stop thinking, and brother you died a long time ago

[quitlebee]

not enough old man yaoi sanuso, oooooohhhhhhh you want to draw old man yaoi sanuso