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reallifesultanas · 5 years ago

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Portrait of Osman I / I. Oszmán portréja

Everyone know that Osman was the founder of the House of Osman, he remembered as the first of the Ottoman sultans. No one knows when or where he was born, and for a long time not a single artefact existed that could be confidently dated to his lifetime. There are two coins (which I already mentioned in the previous post about Ertugrul) from his time, and there are some legends, some descriptions about him, but we don't know too much about him still. So we know Osman was a historical person, but who was he?

His early life

Legends say he was born around 1260 as the son of Ertugrul Bey and Halime Hatun, and was from the Kayi tribe. It seems he had at least two brothers, Gündüz and Savci, who were both older than him. But there are no evidences for these legends. Yes based on the coins he was the son of Ertugrul so it can be true.

He became the bey of his tribe after the death of his father. Some chroniclers hint that after Ertugrul’s death Osman’s uncle, Dündar became the bey, but Osman didn’t want to accept, so he rebelled. Otheres says Osman ebcame the leader and it was Dündar who didn't accept him. Anyhow most chroniclers agree that Dündar and Osman had a fight and in the end Osman killed Dündar with an arrow. The modern sources stay silent about this, because they find it not too glorious to kill your own uncle for the throne. It's hypocrite in my opinion, since fratricide and civil wars were main part of the Ottoman History. So in my opinion there was nothing wrong with this act (if Osman really did that) in such circumstances. Anyhow he became the leader of his tribe at a relatively young age.

Osman's dream

Osman at first was loyal to the Seljuks, but then he began to act independently around 1299. The reason of this act is not known. But the legends say that the whole idea of the Empire – and so his kind of rebel againsts the Seljuks – began quite literally with a dream:

"One night, the first sultan, Osman, was sleeping in the house of a holy man called Edebali when: „He saw that a moon arose from the holy man’s breast and came to sink in his own breast. A tree then sprouted from his navel and its shade compassed the world. Beneath this shade there were mountains, and streams flowed forth from the foot of each mountain. Some people drank from these running waters, others watered gardens, while yet others caused fountains to flow. When Osman awoke he told the story to the holy man, who said “Osman, my son, congratulations, for God has given the imperial office to you and your descendants and my daughter Malhun shall be your wife”."

So after this dream Osman decided that he will creat his own Empire and will not be a servant of another state. Most probably this is just a legend, because these kind of „dreams” have a history with the Central-Asian origin nomad people. For example in the early Hungarian history there is also a dream like this, called „Emese’s dream”. This one is basically the same and story. Emese was the wife of Chief Ügyek, and she was impregnated by a turul bird. The turul appeared to her in a dream and told her that from her womb a great river would begin, and flow out over strange lands. According to dream interpreters, this meant that she would give birth to a son who would lead his people out of their homeland, and that her descendants would be glorious kings. Emese's son was named Álmos, whose name derives from the Hungarian word "álom", meaning dream, thus "Álmos" can be interpreted as "the Dreamt One". And it happened like that, because Álmos became the founder of House Árpád. Interesting fact is that the name Emese had a türk origin, originates from the Old Turkic eme, ana or ene, which mean mother.

So we clearly can see, that these kind of drem-stories can be found in any Central-Asian origin nation's legends and they aremostly have the same meaning.

Osman's life after his dream

Most probably it didn't happened like, Osman had this dream – or not – and he started to build an Empire... Most probably he never even dreamt of such a huge Empire, what later happened to the Ottomans. Most probably he just wanted to make his own beylik, with his own cities.

His first indisputable evidence comes from a Byzantine chronicler, who tells the story of a battle at Bapheus, quite near Nicomedia (Izmit), in July 1302, in which Osman and a force of nomad archers defeated a Byzantine force accompanied by Alan auxiliaries. It is possible that badweather upstream and a rare flood of the Sakarya river downstream made it attractive to Osman and other türk beys to seek to recoup damage to their herds in the lowlands. At this time Osman was no more powerful than a number of other minor beys.

Within a very short time, türk raiders had reached the Sea of Marmara. A contemporary Byzantine chronicler describes how news of Osman’s victories spread and attracted Türks from other areas of western Anatolia to join his following, and how his force was strong enough to defeat a Byzantine army near Nikomedia (Izmit). From their base in the Sakarya valley, where Osman had occupied the old Byzantine fortified places, his men plundered the countryside to the west, forcing the inhabitants into the walled towns. These remained secure, since Osman obviously lacked the military skills to undertake formal sieges: his assault on Nikaia failed. He did take several other fortresses and fortified towns in the Sakarya valley, using them to store his plunder. In a similar manner he destroyed the countryside around Bursa, but also failed to take that city.

His personal life and family

Osman had at least two wives. One was Edebali's daughter for sure, as his dream also suggest. She was named Rabia Bala, or simply Bala but sometimes called Malhun as well. She was the mother of Alaeddin Bey and maybe had other children also. It seems she may had problems with the nomadic lifestyle or her relationship with Osman went wrong, because she spent the last years of her life with her father. She died in Bilecik in 1324 and was buried next to her father’s tomb.

Osman's other wife was Mal Hatun, who possibly was the daughter of the ruler of the Umuri or Amouri principality. According to a Byzantine historian “a son of Umur fought with Osman in one of his first raids against local Byzantine lords”, which may explain the marriage between Osman and Mal Hatun as a political alliance. Mal Hatun was the mother of Osman’s successor Orhan, and she actually outlived her husband as she was buried in the family tomb around Osman’s grave in Bursa. It is not known when she died.

In the first sentence I said at least two wifes... Well yes "a historical tradition regarding the acquisition of one of Osman’s wives calls to mind the Turkish nomadic practice of acquiring women through raids on neighboring tribes. As the story goes, one day on his way to Eskisehir. Osman caught sight of a woman in the village of ltburnu, fell in love with her, and, without telling his father, sent someone to ask for her in marriage. She refused on the grounds that she was not worthy of him, although this may have been an excuse, since there were rumors that Osman intended only a brief dalliance with her. Osman was spurred to kidnap the woman when an erstwhile ally of his, listening to his description of her manifold virtues, decided to take her for himself. Although the sources confuse this woman with Mal Khatun and Edebali’s daughter, she was clearly a person of lesser status. The details of the story indicate that the kidnapping occurred when Osman was quite young and before he had gained more than a local reputation. Women of standing themselves, selves, Edebali’s daughter and Mal Khatun probably married a more mature and powerful Osman."

Osman had at least eight sons and one daughter.

Osman's eldest son - whose name is unfortunatelly unknown - was given to the Selcuk Sultan Gıyasuddin III Keyhusrev to be raised in his household when Ertugrul stipulated a peace treaty with him. He had descendants who were alive at the time in which Bayezid I conquered Malatya. The fact that this son of Osman was sent to the Seljuk Sultan during Ertugrul’s life, suggest that he maybe was born to the women, who Osman captured.

His second son most probably was Orhan, who was born around 1281 and became the second ruler of the Ottoman dynasty. During Orhan's reign the little principality began to acquire a more settled aspect. Osman’s territory had contained no large towns. But in 1326, however, the city of Bursa succumbed to starvation and became, from this date, the first capital of the Ottomans. In the next year, following an earthquake which damaged its fortifications, Orhan’s men occupied the Byzantine town of Lopadion (Ulubat), towards the Dardanelles. Moreover Orhan was the first one who established an Ottoman bridgehead in Europe. He achieved this by exploiting a civil war in Byzantium between the rival Emperors John [VI] Kantakuzenos and John [V] Palajologos. Kantakuzenos sought allies among the Turkish rulers of western Anatolia and, in 1346 formed a pact with Orhan by marrying him to his daughter Theodora. The strategy was successful and, in 1347, Kantakuzenos entered Constantinople and proclaimed himself Emperor, with the other John as his co-regent. So beside his great victories Orhan was the first to use marriage as a tool to get himself supporters. His successors used to do this until Mehmed II, who changed the tradition and stopped the sultans from marrying noble women.

His third son was Alaeddin Ali Bey, who was born around 1290 and later he was made governor of Bilecik. He had a son Kiliç Bey, and their last descendant died in 1530. Aleaddin also built a mosque complex in Bursa. He didn't lived a long life, sources don't agree, but most probably he died around 1330.

Osman's other children are less knowns. We don't know anything for example about Savci Bey, just that his son married one of the daughters of Orhan

I. Melik Bey is also not known, we only know that he had a daughter.

Çoban Bey was surely Osman's son, because he built a mosque in Bursa, and by his complex it is known who he was.

Osman's other son was Pazarli Bey, who was the commander of his brother Orhan I for years, so maybe he was the closest to Orhan? Pazarli Bey also had a daughter, and two sons.

Osman also had another son, Hamid Bey, but we have zero information about him.

Osman had most probably more than one daughter, but we only have evidence for the existence of one. Fatma was named in the foundation deed of later Orhan I, so we know that se existed, but nothing else.

It seems like we know a lot about Osman, isnt it? But actually, even his name is the subject of some controversy!

A Greek historian gave us the description of the Sakarya flood and is the one contemporary writer to mention Osman ’s name, did not call him Osman at all but rather Ataman. The surprising notion that Osman had another name finds support in two later sources. Ataman is a Turkish name or maybe Mongol, while Osman is impeccably Muslim. This has led to some suspicion that Osman, or Ataman, the Ottoman, might have been born a pagan, that he may have taken his new name Osman later when he became a Muslim. But if this were true, if Osman were indeed a convert to Islam who changed his name, why would his sons have kept their genuinely Turkish names, who were Muslims beyond any doubt? From what the greek historian wrote, about the only thing we can surmise of the Turk he called Ataman is that he was a warrior.

Osman's death and legacy

The date of Osman's death too is uncertain. He probably died by 1324, the date of a trust deed registered by his son Orhan. The Moroccan world traveler Ibn Battuta, who visited the area in 1331 - 32, wrote that Osman was buried in the mosque of Bursa, probably the former Church of Saint Elias. This church is no longer standing, due to an earthquake two hundred years ago. Osman's remains now lie next to those of Orhan, father and son in suitable twin mausoleums erected in 1863. All in all it was Osman who was the founder of the Ottoman Empire, and who was to give his name to the Ottoman – or Osmanlı – dynasty.

Used sorces: Colin Imber - The Ottoman Empire, 1300-1650; Peirce - The imperial harem; Faroqhi - The Ottoman Empire and the World; Fleet - The Cambridge History of Turkey, 1071-1453; Howard - A History of the Ottoman Empire; Öztuna - Devletler ve Hanedanlar Cilt 2; Uluçay - Padişahların Kadınları ve Kızları

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Azt mindenki tudja, hogy Oszmán volt az Oszmán-ház megalapítója, és úgy emlékszünk rá, mint az első oszmán szultánra. Azonban senki sem tudja mikor és hol született, évszázadokig létezésére sem volt bizonyíték. Azóta előkerült például két aranyérme, melyeket ő veretett (és amelyekről már szó esett a korábbi, Ertugrulos posztban); ismert néhány leírás is róla, azonban nem tudunk még mindig túl sokat. Tehát akkor ki is volt Oszmán?

Korai évei

A legendák szerint Ertugrul Bég és Halime Hatun fiaként született 1260 körül a Kayi törzsben. Azonban nincs erre bizonyítékunk. Igen, itt vannak az érmék, melyek arra utalnak, hogy Oszmán apja valóban Ertugrul volt, de semmi mást nem tudunk biztosan.

Apja halála után vált a törzs fejévé. Néhány történetíró szerint Ertugrul halála után annak öccse, Dündar lett a bég, amelyet Oszmán nem fogadott el és fellázadt ellene. Más források szerint épp fordítva történt és Oszmán lett a bég, Dündar pedig fellázadt ellene. Akárhogyan is, abban egyetértenek a történetírók, hogy Oszmán és Dündar harcoltak egymással, melynek végén Oszmán egy nyíllal megölte Dündart. A modern források csendben maradnak ezzel kapcsolatban, hiszen méltatlannak érzik, hogy a dinasztia alapító ilyen véres családi küzdelem árán lett bég. Ez véleményem szerint nagy álszentség, hiszen tudjuk, hogy a testvérgyilkosság és a polgárháborúk milyen komoly részét tették ki a birodalom több évszázados történelmének. Véleményem szerint tehát a körülmények ismeretében semmi rossz nem volt abban sem, ha Oszmán valóban így ragadta magához a hatalmat. Mindenesetre azt tudjuk, hogy Oszmán kifejezetten fiatalon vált a törzsét vezető béggé.

Oszmán álma

Oszmán törzsfőként eleinte hűséges volt a Szeldzsuk Államhoz, azonban idővel, 1299 körültől függetlenül kezdett el cselekedni. Ennek oka ismeretlen. A legendák szerint az egész birodalom alapítási ötlet - és ezzel együtt a Szeldzsuk Birodalom elleni lázadás ötlete - egy álommal kezdődött.

"Egyik este az első szultán, oszmán egy szent ember, Edebali házában aludt, amikor:"Azt látta, hogy a hold a szent ember mellkasából a magasba emelkedik, átlebeg az ő mellkasára, majd belesüllyed. Ezekután test��ből egy fa nőtt ki és behálózta a világot. Lombja alatt hegyek voltak, folyók folytak azok lábainál. Néhány ember a folyókból ivott, mások kertjüket locsolták, míg mások szökőkutat alkottak a folyók vizéből." Amikor Oszmán felébredt, elmondta az álmát ennek a szent embernek, aki erre eképpen felelt: " Oszmán, fiam, gratulálok, Isten téged választott, rád és utódaidra bízta a dicső feladatot. Leányom Malhun legyen a feleséged."

Ezután az álom után döntötte el Oszmán, hogy birodalmat alapít, nem pedig más birodalmakat fog szolgálni. Nagy valószínűséggel ez csak egy legenda, hiszen a hasonló álmok kifejezetten gyakranjelennek meg a Belső-Ázsiai eredetű nomád népek hiedelem világában. Például a korai magyar történelemből is ismert egy ilyen álom, Emese álma. Ez alapvetően szinte ugyanaz, mint Oszmáné. Emese Ügyek felesége volt és egy turul madártól esett teherbe, aki álmában meglátogatta és azt mondta neki, hogy méhéből hatalmas folyó fog áradni, mely új vidékekre is eljut. Az álomfejtől szerint ez arra utal, hogy ő fogja világrahozni azt, aki elvezeti új hazájába népüket és, hogy utódaik dicső uralkodókká fognak válni. Emese később világrahozta fiát, aki az Álmos nevet kapta, utalva Emese álmára. Külön érdekessé teszi Oszmán szempontjából a történetet az, hogy maga az Emese név is türk eredetű, amely az ősi török eme/ana/ene szóból ered, mely anyát jelent.

Egyértelmű tehát, hogy ezek az álom-történetek megtalálhatóak a legtöbb Belső-Ázsiai nép legendái között, és szinte minden esetben alapvetően hasonlóak, hasonló jelentéssel bírnak.

Oszmán élete az álma után

Nyilvánvalóan az álom után nem az történt, hogy Oszmán hirtelen birodalmat akart építeni (már ha álmodott egyáltalán)... Valószínűleg még csak álmodni sem mert arról, ami valójában történt leszármazottjaival, hogy ilyen hatalmas birodalmat hoztak létre.Valószínűleg ő csak egy kis bégséget akart magának, néhány városkával.

Első kétségtelen bizonyíték Oszmán uralkodásáról egy bizánci történetírótól származik, aki leírta Bapheus-i csatát, mely Nicomedia (Izmit) közelében történt 1302 júliusában. Eszerint Oszmán és nomádokból álló íjászai legyőztek egy csapat bizánci katonát. Lehetséges, hogy az időjárási körülmények nagyban felbátorították Oszmánt. Ekkoriban ugyanis hatalmas áradás zajlott a Sakarya folyó mentén, amely miatt Oszmán és csapatai szükségét érezték a terjeszkedésnek, hogy legyen hol legeltetni és hová menekíteni állataikat. Ekkoriban azonban Oszmán nem volt több, mint egyike a sok kicsi törzs vezetőinek.

Rövid időn belül azonban győzelmének híre elért a többi türk táborba is, elkezdték őt csodálni és egyre több türk tábor csatlakozott hozzá Nyugat-Anatóliából is. Így a türkök már a Marmara tengerhe is elértek nemsokára. A Sakarya völgyben táboroztak, és innen indultak újra meg újra lerohanni a környező területeket. Valóban sikerült ezzel területet, legelőket szerezniük, azonban egyetlen fallal körülvett várost vagy erődítményt sem sikerült bevenniük. Oszmán megpróbálta Nikaia-t is bevenni, ám nem járt sikerrel, mint ahogy a Sakarya-völgy más városainak esetében sem. Hasonlóan járt Bursával: bár a környéket sikerült meghódítania, a várost magát nem tudta bevenni.

Magánélete

Oszmánnak legalább két felesége volt. Egyikük Edebali Seyk leánya volt, akire az álom is utalt. Rabia Balának, Balának vagy Malhunnak hívták. A források nem értenek egyet nevében. Az bizonyos, hogy ő volt Aleaddin Bég anyja, de lehetséges, hogy más gyermekei is születtek. Úgy tűnik, hogy idővel kapcsolta megromlott Oszmánnal, vagy a nomád élet nem volt nekivaló, de utolsó éveiben visszaköltözött apjához. Bilecikben halt meg 1324-ben és apja mellé temették.

Oszmán másik felesége Mal Hatun volt, aki feltehetőleg az Umuri vagy Amouri területek urának leánya volt. Bizánci történészek szerint "Umur fia Oszmán mellett harcolt, amikor azelőször győzte le a bizánciakat", ami megmagyarázná a valószínűleg politikaiházasságot is Mal és Oszmán között. Mal volt Oszmán örökösének, Orhannak az anyja. Bizonyosan túlélte Oszmánt, ám pontos dátum nem ismert haláláról. Végül családi türbébe temették Bursa közelében.

Az első mondatban azt írtam, LEGALÁBB két feleség... Igen, a történészek szerint Oszmán egyik feleségét a nomádokra jellemző asszony-rablással szerezte. A történet szerint Oszmán egyik nap Eskisehirbe tartott, amikor meglátott egy gyönyörű leányt Itburnu falujánál és azonnal beleszeretett. Apja (Ertugrul) engedélye nélkül odaküldött valakit, hogy kérje ki neki a lányt. A lány elutasította azzal az ürüggyel, hogy nem méltó a férfihoz, ám ez valószínűleg csak kifogás volt. Oszmán ezekután elrabolta a lányt. Sok forrás összekveri ezt a lányt Edebali lányával vagy Mal Hatunnal, azonban egyértelmű, hogy egyikük sem lehetett, hiszen mindketten jóval magasabb rangú nők voltak. A történet részletei arra is utalnak, hogy ez még Ertugrul élete során zajlott, tehát Oszmán igen fiatal volt és nem volt semmiféle befolyása. Edebali leánya és Mal Hatun egy már érettebb Oszmánhoz mentek feleségül.

Oszmánnak legalább nyolc fia és egy leánya volt.

Legidősebb fiát - akinek neve sajnos elveszett az idők során - a Szeldzsuk Szultán, III Giyasuddin Keyhusrev nevelte. A fiúval pecsételődött meg Ertugrul és a szultán béke megállapodása. A fiú Szeldzsukoknak való átadásának idejéből következtethetünk arra, hogy talán az elrabolt parasztlány volt az anyja? Mindenesetre a fiú utódjai egészen I. Bayezid uralkodásának idejéig Malatya környékén éltek.

Második fia valószínűleg Orhan volt, aki 1281 körül született és később ő lett a második oszmán szultán. Orhan uralkodása alatt a kis bégség, melyet Oszmán hozott létre sokkal kifinomultabbá vált. Oszmán ugyanis nem tudott elfoglalni városokat, Orhan azonban 1326-ban sikeresen kiéheztette és elfoglalta Bursa városát. A következő évben pedig egy földrengés után Orhan seregével sikeresen tudta elfoglalni a megrongálódott Lopadion (Ulubat) városát a bizánciaktól. Mindezek mellett Orhan lett az első, aki az európai politikai színtérbe is bele tudott avatkozni. Kihasználta a háborút, amely két rivális között, VI. János Kantakuzenos és V. János Palajologos között zajlott. Kantakuzenos egyezséget kötött Orhannal, ennek megpecsételésére pedig hozzáadta feleségül saját leányát, Teodorát 1346-ban. A stratégia sikeres volt, 1347-ben Kantakuzenos belépett Isztambulba, és császárrá nevezte ki magát. Tehát győzelmei mellett Orhan volt az, aki először kötött jelentős politikai házasságot is. Utódiai egészen II. Mehmed uralkodásáig rendszeresen használták a szövetségkötésnek ezen módját.

Oszmán harmadik fia Aleaddin Ali Bég volt, aki 1290 körül született és életében Bilecik helytartója volt. Született egy fia Kiliç, akinek leszármazottjai még 1530-ban is jelen voltak. Aleaddin emellett mecsetkomplexumot és építtetett Bursában. Nem élt sokáig, a források szerint 1330 körül hunyt el.

Oszmán további fiai kevéssé ismertek. Nem tudunk például semmit Savciról azonkívül, hogy született egy fia, aki később feleségül vette unokatestvérét, I. Orhán leányát.

Oszmán, Pazarli nevű fia Orhan mellett tevékenykedett annak parancsnokaként, tehát lehetséges, hogy a két férfi közel állt egymáshoz. Pazarli bég gyermekei is ismertek, legalább egy lánya és két fia született.

Oszmánnak volt egy Hamid nevű fia is, akiről sajnos nincs semmi információnk.

Oszmánnak mindezek mellett valószínűleg több lánya is volt, azonban csak egyikük létezésére van konkrét bizonyíték. Fatma ugyanis meg volt nevezve I. Orhan egyik alapítványának papírjain, mint Orhan testvére, így ő bizonyosan létezett és Oszmán lánya volt, ám semmi mást nem tudunk róla.

Úgy tűnik sokat tudunk Oszmánról, igaz? Azonban valójában még a neve is ellentmondásos!

Egy görög történész, aki a Sakarya folyó menti ütközetet taglalja Oszmánt nem Oszmán néven említi, hanem Atamanként. A meglepő tény, hogy Oszmánnak lehet egy másik neve is, két másik forrásban is bizonyításra lel. Ataman egy türk vagy mongol eredetű név, amely arra utal, hogy Oszmán eredetileg nem volt talán muszlim sem. Ebből történészek olyan következtetéseket vonnak le, hogy Oszmán talán idővel tért át az iszlámra és vette fel az Oszmán nevet. Azonban ezt cáfolja, hogy fiai kétségkívül muszlimok voltak, mégsem változtatták meg eredeti türk nevüket. Abból, amit a görög történész jegyez az egyetlen plusz információ Atamanról, hogy nagyszerű harcos.

Oszmán halála és hagyatéka

Halálának pontos ideje nem ismert. Valószínűleg 1324-ben hunyt el, mert fiának alapítványi papírjai ezt a dátumot említik. Emellett egy marokkói világutazó, Ibn Battuta 1331-32 körül meglátogatta Bursát és lejegyezte, hogy Oszmán Bursa mecsetjében nyugszik, mely korábban a Szent Elias templom volt. Mára a templom/mecset már nem áll, ugyanis 200 éve egy földrengés elpusztította. Oszmán földimaradványai most Orhan mellett nyugszanak egy ikermauzóleumban, melyet 1863-ban építtettek számukra.

Összességében tehát Oszmán volt az Oszmán Birodalom alapítója és az Oszmán - Osmanlı - dinasztia neve is tőle eredeztethető.

Felhasznált források: Colin Imber - The Ottoman Empire, 1300-1650; Peirce - The imperial harem; Faroqhi - The Ottoman Empire and the World; Fleet - The Cambridge History of Turkey, 1071-1453; Howard - A History of the Ottoman Empire; Öztuna - Devletler ve Hanedanlar Cilt 2; Uluçay - Padişahların Kadınları ve Kızları

#osman i #bala hatun #malhun #malhun hatun #rabia bala #orhan i #bursa #ottoman empire #osmanlı #ataman #osman #orhan #şeyh edebali #edebali

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scotianostra · 5 years ago

Video

youtube

Today's first anniversary is about one of our most popular Folk singer-songwriters.

25th June 1936 saw the birth of Roy Williamson.

Roy Murdoch Buchanan Williamson was born in Edinburgh, the son of Archibald and Agnes Williamson. From a very well-to-do family of Aberdeen solicitors, Archibald had moved to the capital, where he soon established himself as a prominent advocate who was tipped to become a King’s Counsel. His mother was Agnes Cumming, the daughter of a master haberdasher from Haddington. Since Agnes was a talented pianist I think we can safely assume her son’s musical gifts probably came from her, as Archibald was described as a serious man and worked hard with very little time to play with his sons, Roy and his 1 year older brother Robert.

While the blend of creative genes and intellectual genes ultimately proved successful in the embodiment of Roy and his brother Robert, it did not serve a good combination for a happy marriage. Neither Robert nor Roy have ever commented much on their childhood, but sources say the household was a strained one, with tension and arguments between the husband and wife, and the boys relying on each other and the servants for love and affection. At age 8, the boys would lose his father, and it would not be until almost 30 years later that they would learn the truth. While the 1944 obituaries for Archibald Williamson that were carried in all the leading Scottish papers praised the achievements of the 45-year-old advocate, they delicately avoided the cause of death, describing it as “sudden” and “unexpected”, and it was not until the 1970s when Roy's mother died that he learned the cause of death was coal gas poisoning,at the time, the most common form of suicide in the at the time.

Although the marriage was strained Archibal's death had had a profound effect on Agnes, who suffered a nervous breakdown and was confined to a psychiatric hospital for almost a year.

Cared for by neighbours and relatives in Aberdeen during this period, it would be a short time before they were sent to Aberlour, a preparatory school for Gordonstoun, the boarding school in Moray. Despite having asthsma, Roy threw himself into sports, which was easily done as Gordonstoun largely emphasised outdoor activities and this time period would see him develop into a decent athlete who, while a student, was a winger for the Edinburgh Wanderers rugby side.

Although his mother was by now back in residence, Roy and Robert recalled that “our mother phoned up the school a day before we were due to break up for the holidays to say she couldn’t have us. Whether she couldn’t cope, or whether she wanted to push responsibility on to the school, I don’t know."

With no other family members willing or able to take the boys, their "family" memories of holidays were being "sent back to our old prep school and the headmaster took us in for Christmas and on another occasion we were put into the care of a young German master, and off we went to the Bannavil Arms in Newtonmore to spend Christmas and New Year there.”

While one brother seemed to take this in stride, Roy handled the situation by building a wall between his mother and himself, which never came down. When, after a brief spell teaching seamanship at Burghead, Roy became a student at Edinburgh College of Art, he moved into lodgings rather than stay at home. His mother reciprocated by refusing to attend his wedding in 1958, and when she died Williamson wasn’t among the mourners at her funeral.

While still a student, Roy met Violet Thomson, a fellow art student working in the laundry when he came to wash his clothes. They dated briefly and were still students when they married in Inverness. By now, as young art students, Roy and Vi, as she was known were two of the many of a generation that was entering into a scene that would change not only their lives, but the world's, the swinging sixties.

Casting off the conventions of Gordonstoun Roy and his wife’s lifestyle was becoming increasingly bohemian "generation of love and peace" penetrated Edinburgh’s Presbyterian defences. They embraced the times, and not even the very quick arrival of two daughters, Karen and Sheena prevented the Williamsons’ home from becoming a popular venue for parties. Their parties were frequented by such people as Marianne Faithfull and her date "Mick Jagger". As well, there was a particularly strong Irish influence, and Roy became great friends with The Dubliners, The Clancy Brothers and, later, Finbar Furey. It was listening to their passion for Ireland, at this heartfelt time when music reflected the soul, Williamson began to think more deeply about his own feelings for Scotland.

From an early age, with his mother having taken refuge in her piano, Roy had been exposed to and interested in music and one of the few things Agnes Williamson had done with her boys was to regularly take them to concerts at the Usher Hall.

In this interest Roy had also found an ally in Ronnie Browne. Although they directly opposed each other on the rugby field, as Browne was also a winger for Edinburgh rivals Boroughmuir, they were in the same art classes. With another friend, guitarist Bill Smith, the three formed the Corrie Folk Trio, they would later add singer Paddie Bell, but, circumstances would lead to arguments and by 1966 Williamson and Browne forged out on their own.

With the folk music scene in Scotland flourishing, adding their talent it was no surprise that within a short time the Corries were a hit. By now no longer art students, but teachers, with Roy Williamson at Liberton High School and Browne teaching in Musselburgh they found it increasingly hard to meet the demands of their on the road tour career and be present everyday at their day jobs. Nightly gigs along with a day job soon proved impossible and Williamson and Browne resolved to organise and run their own concert tours. Now, also appearing on television, with Browne's wife, an accountant, taking care of the business side, the Corries became an increasingly popular group as well as a successful business venture. Although the Corries gave the impression of performing easily and "off the cuff", rehearsals were meticulous and nothing was left to chance.

The Corries were a phenomenal success and most people can tell the story from here. Roy, talented but private, was in fact, the antithesis of his partner Browne, and off stage, they did not coexist. While oddly, on the surface, they had so much in common, with shared passions for painting, music, Scotland and rugby to this day Browne concedes he knows very little about Williamson’s life outwith The Corries, which is an astounding admission to make of his musical and business partner of 30 years.

Roy Williamson carried the spirit of the 60's for the rest of his life, however, his wife Vi did not, and the decade ended, so did the marriage. While a simple and pure folk singer on stage, Roy embraced the lifestyle of "wine, women and song" and partied as hard as he worked. Where Browne favoured financial and emotional security, ultimately being married for more than 50 years, Roy Williamson eschewed material possessions and had a much more nonchalant view about relationships. He would also have several serious dalliances in the next decade.

In 1980, Williamson would enter into a relationship which seemed to be detrimental to him and became a concern for all around him. With Nicky van Hurck, from Holland, he moved from Edinburgh to Forres, buying Mayfield, a large old stone house with a garden. Whether due to Nicky’s influence or not Williamson became more reclusive and he spent time painting seascapes, but did tour with Browne once a year.

It was during the Corrie's 1989 tour that Williamson's health started to decline. Diagnosed with a brain tumour, and having an unsuccessful surgery in January 1990, Roy Williamson died at the age of 54. I always feel a sense of sadness when someone who, like Roy, was a big part of my growing up, my mum was a big fan and her and her pal Nicky Bruce used to go see the Corries, I was never so lucky myself but am glad of Youtube so I can listen to them.

Let's finish the post with an upbeat tune, Bannockburn anniversary has just passed and this is the Corries doing a comedy song, the lyrics of which come from the late great Matt McGinn. The song might not be exactly correct history wise, but it's guid craic.

Bannockburn

In 1314, the twenty-fourth of Jue King Eddie says "We're ready now to steal the stone of Scone" He brought his biggest army but discovered he'd backed a duece At Bannockburn he found that he was up against a Bruce cho: Well, we raised our pipes and the English kept a-coming But they werena quite so happy when we gie'd the pipes a blaw Struck once more, they began a-running Ready steady Eddie, go, it's time to shoot the craw Well, we had a bowl of porridge and a wee bit pinch of salt We had a dram of whisky and it was the finest malt We each wore a tammy and we wore the philibegs Eddie was in terror when he seen the hairy legs Now poor King Edward, nearly had a fit When he seen his cavalry falling doon a pit His men looked up from the trap that Bruce had built And they were shocked to find out what was worn beneath the kilt He sent for his archers, a group of country folk They erred and they purred, what a funny way they spoke With those archers Eddie had a go But they were as effective as the ones on radio On the fastest horse that you ever saw King Eddie went a-racing o'er the Border and awa He was fond of Scotland, but he never did return He didn't like the welcome that he got at Bannockburn

#Scotland #scottish #folk singer #singersongwriter #the corries

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pineaberry · 5 years ago

Text

Fictober 2019: #16

Star Wars: The Old Republic.

Inspired by all the Quinn love on my dash, here it is:

The Transponder Station Pt. 3 aka You Dun Goofed

Pt. 1 Found Here: [X]

Pt. 2 Found Here: [X]

For @doomhamster who was very distressed after part 2.

And also, the Quinn fam:

@sunsetofdoom, @fluffynexu, @riajade01, @aliyamirat, @kunoichi-ume, @cinlat, @semper-draca, @gerdavonrinnlingen @velvetsunset

________________________

Malavai awoke with a start. He immediately sat up and looked around in confusion. The last thing he remembered was the Transponder Station…

His hand immediately flew to his throat but he felt nothing, no soreness, no dull ache to remind him of his foolishness. He was in Tremas’ quarters, in her bed. He could hear the water running in the refresher. How many times had he woken up to that sound? Had she brought him back? After everything, had she let him back into her life?

He glanced at the chrono nearby and froze. The date was wrong. It was off by at least a week. He frowned as he reached for his datapad and verified that it too displayed the date of one week ago. Suddenly the datapad sparked in his hands and flickered to reveal the schematics of assassin droids. Instinctively, Malavai dropped the datapad and it smashed onto the floor.

It was wrong. This was was all wrong.

The refresher opened with a hiss and steam spilled into the room.

The scent of vanilla sugar filled his nostrils.

__________

Dead or alive…

Tremas watched Malavai’s sprawled, unconscious form for a moment before nudging him onto his back with the tip of her boot. He was unresponsive but he was breathing.

Alive then.

She supposed once the rage filtered away, she would be glad of it. Right now all she could do was focus on the pain of her injuries so she could harness the force through them. The inferno of her wrath had burned away and now all she had left were the cold ashes: remnants of what they’d shared.

Baras had sought to crush her with Draag, but it was Quinn –efficient, brilliant, resourceful Quinn- who managed to utterly destroy her. It was a sound decision. Between the two of them, Quinn was the most dangerous, Sith or not. Her cooling anger allowed her to gain some perspective. She analyzed every moment, every phrase uttered between them.

She’d known from the beginning Baras had sent him. Mercy and genuine affection had allowed him to join her group. After all, who knew what Baras would have done to him if she had refused to take him? It would have been a waste to lose someone as dependable and skilled as Quinn. She often mused that she fell in love with him the moment he cut off that smug Jedi’s escape on Balmorra. The way he lorded his superiority over the Republic spy as not only attractive, it was accurate. Quinn was a resource, a weapon of deadly accuracy in the right hands. Then again, Baras excelled at needlessly destroying loyal agents under his command.

No, bringing Quinn along with her had been the right call. Personal feelings aside, it had been beneficial to the empire. She’d believed, perhaps naively, that her actions could sway him to switch sides when the inevitable happened. She cultivated a meticulous image of respect and devotion to her master. Although she often encouraged Vette’s snarky retorts behind his back, she always exuded an aura of submission in his presence.

It was fortunate that Baras thought her so completely loyal to his cause, as it blinded him to the danger she posed. Her flattery and deference was mistaken for weakness. It was little wonder that he didn’t put much effort into plotting her destruction. Had he viewed her as the threat she truly was, he would have chosen to do away with her in a far more vicious manner. Instead, he sent a weak excuse of an apprentice who ultimately butchered the job so badly he ended on the wrong end of an incinerator. Her deceit had paid off. Her master realized her true power only once she had slipped from his fat, greedy fingers. The fact that Baras didn’t consider Quinn as his first choice simply emphasized just how skewed his judgement had become. Even now she was having to scrounge every bit of force energy to keep from succumbing. If it had been Quinn who had acted against her in Quesh, well… She wouldn’t be around now to mull about it.

Quinn…

Her thoughts turned nebulous as the emotions around him were still raw and bleeding. She’d never put much stock on love. She never saw a need for it. On Korriban, acolytes toyed and vied for each other’s affections but it had been a power play to build up and exploit. She too had played that game. A quick smile here, a gentle word there. She had always excelled at finding what people wanted before giving them a taste of it. The promise of more often was enough to lure them to her side. Alas, Sith were volatile and fickle, but soldiers -she recalled- soldiers were easy. When she was assigned on missions with them, she made sure they all returned and with minimal damages. She provided them with protection and respect. Some she gifted with her approval and recommendations of promotion to their superiors. In return they were loyal and provided her with intel on what the other acolytes may be plotting against her.

Perhaps that had been her mistake, believing Malavai’s loyalty would be so easily given like the soldiers’ on Korriban... believing his loyalty was so easily bought like Pierce’s. His situation was far more complex. Disgraced once before, he owed Baras his career, perhaps his very life. No doubt Moff Broysc would have executed him given the chance. He had come to her with his loyalty already pre-determined. Honorable to a fault, he had served his master, his true master to the only logical end. How could she kill him for that? How could she destroy such an iron will simply because she could not make it bow to her?

I’d be no better than Baras.

It was genius really, her own game turned against her. At some point she had wanted that loyalty for herself. Not just his loyalty. His skill, his power, his deadliness, his brilliance, his passion, his heart… she’d wanted all of him and no doubt he had sensed it. Never had she met a more intelligent man. Never had there been anyone she wanted to make Hers -with a capital H- with such intensity. Her Clever Captain had known her desires all along, she made no secret of them, and he allowed her a taste. Just a taste so she would be lulled into a sense of complacency. A taste so she could believe she held claim to him like a trophy she had wrested away from Baras’ grubby hands. A taste to make her feel victorious and invincible. She’d forgotten -or forgiven- the fact that he was Baras’ man. She’d forgotten when he whispered those sweet words, and held her close, that there was a threat and a danger just beneath the surface.

She’d been a silly child, seduced and duped by a man nearly a decade her senior. How could she not have seen it before? While Tremas toyed and bantered with Quinn, he humored her all the while biding his time. Her own overpowering obsession with possessing him as her property coupled with basic Sith arrogance had blinded her to the truth: Quinn would say and do anything to ensure that, when the time came, she would believe his word as fact.

She grappled with the emotions attached to those memories before her mind finally accepting the truth. Quinn didn’t love her... and it was devastating.

She analyzed that last emotion finally coming to terms with the feeling seizing her chest. Far beyond the mere denial of a cherished prize, she felt the cataclysm of having her still beating heart torn out of her. There would be more time for deeper introspection later, but at least now she knew that what she was feeling had a cause, and a name. Her weakness made itself manifest. A one-sided love was a poisonous way to live.

Adapt or die.

How many times had Overseer Tremel echoed those words? Usually before throwing her off a cliff. Things rarely went according to plan. The messy emotions and relationships surrounding said plans often shifted them when they did not outright derail them without warning. She was Sith, the Emperor’s Wrath, not some tender hearted Alderaanian maiden who would waste away in despair. Emotions were but an arsenal at her disposal, even pain was useful in its own way. The choice, if it could be called that, was clear.

“A Sith’s strength doesn’t lie in never failing, but by never letting failure defeat them. If you cannot pick yourself up after a fall, then you are no Sith at all.”

Circumstances had changed. A new center would have to be found. A new center other than Malavai. As though on cue, Quinn’s eyes snapped open and he yelped as though in pain. As he became aware of his surroundings and he seemed almost puzzled at first. The droids lay in pieces scattered about the room and the implications of his actions struck him. There, leaning heavily against a broken droid, was Tremas. She seemed almost calm amidst the destruction. The droids awkward limbs curled around her in a cruel mockery of an embrace.

He braved to look into her gaze and noted the gold had left her eyes but in its place bone-white pupils remained. An expressed Sith gene, no doubt brought about by the strain of the battle and a testament to the purity of her lineage. The skin around her left eye was a glistening twisted mess of charred skin. His inner medic wanted to reach out and place soothing kolto bandages over the wound to prevent infection and scarring.

“You disappoint me Quinn, I had such high hopes for you,” she said and damn him if he didn’t believe it, “but you fell into the same trap as everyone else. I could respect the fact that you were bound by honor. I can understand how you felt you owed Baras your loyalty after he had saved you. I could even understand your reasoning that you believed him to be better for the Empire. But that wasn't why you did this was it?"

Her voice darkened towards the end of that sentence.

"It is the same reason why you failed so completely. How little you must think of me. How weak am I in your eyes." Her voice was cold and unyielding, like a metal blade grazing his throat. "After all you've seen, after so much observation, you underestimated me. You judged me lacking just as your Master did, and countless others before him. I really thought you were smarter than this, Quinn. Did you learn nothing? For all your calculations, you truly believed I would be so easily destroyed? Did you think I had destroyed my enemies out of sheer luck? Or did you expect I would simply lay my weapons down and allow you to execute me? Regale me, Captain. Exactly how stupid did you think I was?”

He was taken aback by her berating although not for the first time, he was at a loss. She had, of course, come to her own conclusions. For all the ways this conversation could have gone, he hadn't expected this. He stood staring at the floor unable to voice a response that wouldn't shame him further. He could feel that pallid stare burning a hole through him as the tense silence wore on. Mercifully, she continued.

“Stupid enough not to know Baras had placed you in my crew as a spy? Too stupid to intercept your monthly reports to Kaas City? Or perhaps so stupid as to not to realize there was an entire communications channel encrypted on my ship that only you used?”

Malavai’s heart sank as he stared at the floor with widened eyes. She’d known from the beginning. But then why…?

She visibly strained to keep her anger in check otherwise he was sure he would have found himself in another choke hold.

“What you have done has broken the trust between us. However, I understand that this… all of this… is a result of the same toxic Sith infighting poisoning the Empire. You do not… you will not die by my hand today. Caught between us both, I fail to see how you could have done anything that didn’t result in either of us destroying you. I suppose you were wise to try your luck with me. I will keep you alive, and we will see if you earn my trust again.”

He stared at her stunned at her decision. She had refused to kill him. At best she would have left him stranded on the station, at worst, sent him to Baras for punishment. To keep him in her care, under her protection, it was more than he could have hoped.

“My Lord, I’m… this is unexpected. Darth Baras would never forgive such a failure,” he uttered unable to formulate a more apt response.

“I am not Darth Baras… nor do I aspire to be, but my forgiveness is not some cheap trinket feely given,” she scowled before jabbing a finger in his direction, “You will pledge your absolute, unwavering loyalty to me and me alone.”

“I pledge myself-”

“Do not speak those words in haste, Captain! Listen. No, really listen. I will not tolerate you taking my decision to spare you lightly. I've had my fill of you and you Master finding reasons to call me inept,” she cut him off and he flinched at the as her words hit home, “if you have no intention of following through with your pledge just say so and we go our separate ways. The choice is yours.”

All the love in the world had not changed the fact that he had betrayed her. His failure had been predetermined but it remained. And still she gave him a choice. He could walk away, tail between his legs and simper back to Baras or worse… defect. The very thought of having to live without her became stifling and he knelt before her out of sheer instinct.

“If you will permit me to stay in your charge, my dedication to you will never come into question again,” he vowed.

"Trust is difficult to rebuild, Quinn. But I'm willing to try," she replied looking tired.

"I understand if things are different for a while," he said casting his eyes down, "this interruption has delayed you enough. I'm eager to return to the ship and put this behind us."

He needed to leave this place and the stain of his betrayal lest it cling to him forever. She turned to leave without a word and he quickly followed her.

“The ship is through there. Prepare for departure, I'll join you shortly,” she ordered as they passed the station’s medical droid.

“Of course, my lord. One thing, my lord -- do you plan on telling the others what happened?” he asked and immediately hated how much he sounded like a nervous child pleading with his teacher not to tell his parents. She stopped in the middle of the corridor and turned to face him. He couldn’t help but flinch at the sight of her face. Her gaze was tinted an eerie silver by the light refracted off the metallic walls and her left eye was encircled in charred skin. Self-loathing rose in his throat as he realized the selfishness of his question. To her credit she took it in stride.

“I fail to see how this involves anyone else. I don’t plan to tattle, Quinn,” she replied with the ghost of a smile on her face. Her expression sent a chill up his spine as it seemed far too cold and broken to be the Tremas he knew.

“I appreciate it, my Lord. I will see you back at the ship,” he nodded thankful at having an order to execute. She watched him depart with her mind still clouded and weary. Slowly she made her way to the nearest console and began running one of Vette’s slicer programs. Soon she had access to the ship’s surveillance. With a deft keystroke, she erased the data, and proof of Quinn’s actions. Baras would be denied even the shadow of his prize, just as he had denied her.

Her armor felt too tight and constricting. With the danger past, she saw no harm in loosening the belt around her waist. Something hot ran down her side and soaked through her greaves. Perhaps a kolto packet had burst, regardless, she paid it no attention. Tremas managed to reach her airlock doors before she noticed the visible trail of blood she was leaving. Vette, of course, was the first one to spot her.

“TREMAS!” her cry brought the rest of the crew to the doorway. "What happened? Your face, you're hurt!"

“Baras fed us false information. It was a trap,” she stated as she wobbled. Quinn came down from the bridge looking pale and distraught as he saw the effects of the battle had finally caught up with her, “…didn't see it coming. Captain, are we on course... for... Corellia...”

Quinn’s throat went dry as he saw the once powerful Sith staggering. Her face was far too white and crimson blood was falling from her side in thick heavy drops to pool on the floor. Pierce was the one who caught her as she collapsed like a house of cards.

“Medical, now!" Quinn barked out the order as he ran to prepare the kolto tank. His mind raced trying to remember all the damage she had sustained. Blaster wounds cauterized on impact… He froze as he recalled the vibroknife he had driven into her side.

It was his fault. This was all his fault.

________________________

Read More About Tremas HERE!

Original Fictober Promp List HERE!

#Malavai Quinn #SWTOR #SWTOR OC #Tremas Cidran #Fictober19

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visarcana · 7 years ago

Text

Kamakura

Since I have made quite a lot of research about Hitomi’s hometown, I thought it may not be a bad idea to write it all down. In this part, Kamakura itself, the trains and Hitomi’s school. I plan to make a shorter second part, too.

The series’ production team modeled the scenes after the real Kamakura, which is a Japanese coastal town with a quite long and important past. At one time, it was considered the (unofficial) capital, which is why one chapter of Japan’s history is named “Kamakura period”. Today, the population is under 200 000, which cannot be compared to the biggest cities of Japan, but it can be reached from Tokyo in just about an hour, which by some definitions makes it a part of the Greater Tokyo Area. It is probable Hitomi&co. can make trips to Tokyo quite easily. For example, Hitomi’s dream date with Allen takes place near (a version of) Tower 109 in Shibuya.

The very first scene of the series takes us to an imaginary school called Kamakura Kita Private High School (Shiritsu Kamakura Kita Koukou), where Hitomi experiences her early high-school dramas together with her classmate, Yukari Uchida, and the upperclassman, Susumu Amano. The inscription on the track suit suggests the name of the school can be casually shortened to ‘Kamakita’.

Since the school is private and ‘all ages’ type, I somehow believe that the students are middle class and higher. I made especially Amano’s family loaded in my fic, it was just offering itself with his overseas study and the connection to Allen (whose family is by no means poor either).

Kamakura Kita itself means “Kamakura North”, which would suggest the position of the school in the city. As Hitomi and Yukari are on their way back from school, they pass by some existing buildings (I have an artbook with map regarding just that). However, the most specific location given is by the Sasuke Inari shinto shrine, which (but only when this anime is concerned), is right across the street from Hitomi’s school track field. Of course, in real Kamakura, there is no high school in the vicinity (in fact, there are no buildings where the school is supposed to be - just hills with a forest). The shrine itself is one of the main tourist attractions of the town, along with the steps with the set of red gates which lead to it.

As Hitomi&co. run “up the hill” to escape from the dragon, you see them pass something that looks like a bus stop sign to me, called Kita Kou-mae - “(in front of the) North High (school)”.

But on her way to school, Hitomi waits at the Kamakura Koukou-mae tram station, which means “(in front of the) Kamakura High School” itself, probably dating back to when there was just one high school in town (meaning, it’s a coincidence and the station is not close to Hitomi’s school, but rather, her home).

It is one of the most famous stations in Japan because of it’s captivating views of the sea, Mt. Fuji and Enoshima island. And because it serves the historical electric railway (or tram) called Enoden. The tram connects the railway stations of Kamakura and the neighboring town. The station has besides Esca been featured in the anime/manga Slam Dunk and some movies!

Anyway, it can be assumed that Hitomi (and possibly Yukari, who accompanies her on her way home) live somewhere in the southern (southwestern) part of town, closer to the sea, and take the tram on their commute to their school which is located more north (northeast).

In Vis Arcana, Yukari&co. take the same tram to the main railway station so they can board the Tokyo train there. The logistics got a bit difficult, because I could not give up on some details, for example, I wanted to open with Yukari having the same view Hitomi had at the end of the series (which fixed her at the tram station). And I could not really see how Hitomi could get into the life-threatening situation there.

Now that I look at the screenshots, I see a similar scene as the one I wrote was maybe possible, but looking at the map I thought there was not even a reason to cross the track on the tram station. Or the road. Because you know, the very first draft of this chapter from, idk, 2014 or something, had Hitomi almost ran over by a car. But then I was hit by a realization, “Wait, you have her being ran over by a CAR in front of a TRAIN station???” Also, I specifically wrote it to be a VAN... and when I reread later I was like... “Won’t someone take this as a symbolism of the crappiest sort imaginable, lol?”

Anyway, the main train station looks something like this [IMG SRC]:

What surprised me is that there are only two tracks/platforms and the station is relatively small. Apparently, the Tokyo train always leaves from the track/platform 2. Since there are train otaku out there, I even found a video of how it looks like, haha (from about 3:00 there are trains leaving from platform 2):

youtube

When I saw the situation on Google Maps, I saw that backyard shortcut opportunity, you can even get to the parking lot behind the station with Street View and see the little hill and fence which divides it from the station.

So there, this should explain the first chapter in more detail than anyone ever wanted, haha. In my defense, this is several years of rewriting the chapter, occasional rewatching and researching. Especially when I felt I wrote myself into a corner, things like these helped me to get back on track (no pun intended).

I plan to make another (much shorter) post like this in relation to chapter 4, because there were some interesting findings as well... see ya!

~Rin

#visarcana #background notes

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minatozaki-sana · 7 years ago

Note

Can you help me with one kind of stupid thing? How can I start rping on tumblr? Like... How do i plot and interact?

we all had to start somewhere, so this is a more than valid question ! first off, here and here are two pretty extensive guides to tumblr rping, but i’ll try to cut everything short under the read-more and have it be more up to date. also if you have any more questions or want more details on a certain topic, don’t be afraid to ask again !

i. types of rps.

since you found this blog i hope it’s safe to assume you somewhat know your way around the rpc ? but just in case, the following tags are most popular for different type of rps: appless rp, bio rp, skeleton rp, semi appless rp, twitter rp and lsrp. there are also a good amount of subcategories for rps, for example apartment rp, mumu rp ( multi-muse ), new rp, pairs rp, etc. it all kind of depends what you’re looking for but for starters i’d recommend appless rps as they’re the easiest to step foot in.

all of the above are group roleplays with set rules, but if you’re not into that, there’s also indie rping. the main tag is indie rp with different subcategories as well. the indie com is more laid-back as you basically write down your own rules ( always make sure to read other ppl’s rules as well ) and you can take as much time for your replies as you’d like opposed to groups where the time limit is 2 - 5 days nowadays. though, i’d only rec the indie com for people over 18 as it has many muns who like to post smut starters without properly tagging them but using nsfw gifs. also there are quite a few nasty ppl out there who like to write inc*st or non-consenting threads which just .. yikes Blocked.

ii. joining a rp.

as you’re browsing the tags, you’ll hopefully find a rp you like and would like to join. please, please make sure to read the plot, rules and if applicable faq pages completely and if it’s a new rp also scrolling through the blog itself just to avoid possibly joining a rp that allows something ( or someone ) you’d rather not be affiliated with. in case everything’s fine and you went through all the pages, it’s best to have the taken / characters page open along with the application format just to avoid using a faceclaim ( the celeb you’d like your character to look like ), name or even label that’s already in use.

most admins are very adamant about the app format not being changed ( ex. all lowercase or certain words in uppercase, etc ) so please listen to them otherwise they’ll ask you to resend the app or they’ll have to change it on the taken page. it’s always good for an admin to see that their members actually care about what they created.

most apps ask for a faceclaim, name, age, gender, pronouns, label ( + tag ), occupation, positive and negative traits ( + tag ) and sometimes a fun fact, their zodiac sign, what they googled last, a movie / song / show they love, etc. basically just send in your app as soon as it’s finished ! below you’ll also find an old app of mine for an appless rp.

iii. setting up an account.

hopefully you know how to set up an account on tumblr, but if not, the first guide covers it well. as soon as your account is set up, install new xkit ( without it you basically won’t be able to write replies ). select xkit on your dashboard and install the following extensions ( click ‘ get extensions ‘ ): anti-capitalism, drafts+, editable reblogs ( the most important ! ), go-to-dash, no recommended, old sidebar, old stats, one-click reply, outbox, timestamps, tweaks, xinbox. as for tweaks, go back to ‘ my xkit ‘, find ‘ tweaks ‘ and try to see what you like best.

from here on i recommend following the steps from the first guide, starting at ‘ THE ACCOUNT: AESTHETICS ‘ as i basically do the same. here’s also my theme tag along with a general one.

iv. writing your intro.

now before you’re able to plot with others, you’ll have to write an intro. it’s essentially just to introduce yourself with a small blurb and then elaborating on your muse ( character ). below you can find an example in the form of an old blog of mine, it was for a skeleton rp, but basically it’s the same for appless rps ( except that i never write a bio or create a headcanon page for those ). if you follow the link to the intro, you’ll see a load of text.

the first thing i always do for my intro is add a gif icon ( usually 100x100 pixel or below and you can find them by typing in https://www.tumblr.com/tagged/danielle-campbell-gif-icons for example ), write something small about me / the rp and then add the app format under a read more. everything underneath is the muse’s backstory, personality and wanted plots. ( also as a tip it’s always good to trigger warn your writing. )

v. plotting.

this is often dreaded due to bad past experiences or anxiety but honestly.. keep calm during this. plotting is actually one of my favorite things and i tend to ramble a Lot while talking to strangers so as long as you’re passionate about your muse it’ll work out. and if someone’s not interested in plotting with your muse someone else definitely will. as a true flop i didn’t include any wanted plots in my intro, but i’m also very spontaneous regarding connections aka i’ll read their intro and think of a plot that could work and let them add onto it bc only the mun knows their muse best. if you need any connections idea though, here and here are a few.

as for approaching someone, most of the time i’m looking for something in their intro i could use to bond over outside rping, like with my intro it could be a shared interest for dc and / or marvel. or honestly just compliment them on their muse bc i love doing so when you can really feel they put a lot of effort into creating them. alternatively just quote a vine in all caps.

one thing to avoid doing is sound soo very monotone when you can clearly see that they’re excited to plot and you just don’t seem to care. sharing excitement is a good thing while plotting and the rpc in general !

vi. replying.

plugging in this guide one last time bc the last part covers all of it !

vii. extras.

make sure you’re only following blogs from the main rp’s blogroll to avoid confusion.

if you want to leave a rp, please message the main. a simple ‘ hey ! i’m afraid this rp isn’t for me ‘ or ‘ i won’t have time to dedicate to this rp ‘ will do. it’s always better than to just delete or switch to another rp.

it’s nice to check the starter tag from time to time to make sure new members feel welcome ( most if not all rps have their own starter tag which can be found on their blog ).

in case you join a rp that has meme days, don’t be afraid to ask the admins for help even if it’s just to find some to reblog ( museinspo has a tag for them as well along with other musings blogs ). in addition it’s polite to send everyone a meme to answer / reply to.

museinspo’s navigation might also help clear up a few things, plus it’s a great blog for character creation and development.

hopefully this was beginner’s friendly ?? and happy rping !

#rp guide #rph #anonymous #answered #i .. really tried with this but also knowing me ? probably forgot half of the stuff.

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survivormagictreehouse · 5 years ago

Text

Christmas in Camelot Final Immunity

Welcome to the final stretch of your grand adventure, Master Librarians.

Someone has invited you all to Camelot in its greatest hour of need. You must complete four trials in order to break the curse and save everyone, Morgan included!

Beyond the iron gate

The keepers of the cauldron wait.

Four gifts you will need

The first from me,

Then a cup, a compass

And finally a key.

If you survive to complete your quest,

The secret door lies to the west.

The fate of Camelot rests in your hands, this is your most daunting task to date. Don’t let your concentration slip, you can’t afford to lose this one.

For one last time...

“...The tree house started to spin.

It spun faster and faster.

Then everything was still.

Absolutely still...”

Hello, survivors! This round, you will be participating in multiple competitions to become the final immunity necklace holder of the season!

The goal of this final immunity is to score as high as possible over the next TWO DAYS on four different challenges!

CHALLENGE ONE: LIVE TRIVIA

Starting at 11PM tonight, you will be added to a challenge chat where random trivia questions will be asked sporadically for the next 24 hours. These questions will be about anything from the history of this season, pop culture, and niche facts that may require a quick google. Your goal is to be the first to answer correctly!

Spelling DOES NOT matter as long as we can tell what you meant to say. If the question asks for multiple answers, YOU MUST include them all in one message. YOU MAY ONLY GUESS TWICE FOR A QUESTION, but once someone aside from you guesses, you can guess twice again (basically you can not send more than two messages in a row). YOU MAY NOT TALK IN THE CHALLENGE CHAT OR YOU WILL LOSE 3 POINTS AUTOMATICALLY!

It would benefit you greatly to study what has happened so far in the game!

Any further questions can be forwarded to your host or tribe chat!

CHALLENGE TWO: FLASH GAME

Starting now, you may start working on the flash game: Winterbells.

The goal of this challenge is to simply score the highest on the flash game and send a screenshot of your score to your host chat.

YOU MAY ONLY SEND YOUR SCREENSHOT ONCE, so please be cognizant of that. As soon as we see a score from you it will be locked in, regardless of why you sent it to your host chat.

YOUR SCREENSHOT MUST INCLUDE YOUR NAME, THE DATE AND TIME, and “MTH FINAL IMMUNITY” ON THE SCREEN. You may also screenshot your score with your host chat visible on the screen instead.

You can find the flash game here: LINK

CHALLENGE THREE: ENDURANCE

At any time you wish, you may begin the endurance portion of this challenge (in a separate challenge chat that you create, not your host chat).

Your goal is to count as high as possible within five hours (meaning your first and last messages MUST be time-stamped within a five hour span, otherwise they will not count. You may choose when to do this comp entirely on your own). How you will count will go as follows...

Message one: I read Dinosaurs before Dark with John.

Message two: I read Dinosaurs before Dark with Czern.

Message three: I read Dinosaurs before Dark with Dan.

You will continue counting up like this in the order that the eliminated players were voted off.

The list of eliminated players in order is: John, Czern, Dan, Austin, Jay, Vi, Timmy L, Zach, Keegan, Bodhi, Cindi, Chips, Collin, Timmy Z, Jess, Rachael

Once you have read the book with every player that has been voted off, you will move on to the next book and start again. It will go as follows...

Message sixteen: I read Dinosaurs before Dark with Rachael.

Message seventeen: I read Knight before Dawn with John.

Message eighteen: I read Knight before Dawn with Czern.

A list of books can be found here: LINK. It will start with Dinosaurs before Dark and end with Camp Time in California.

If you happen to read all 35 books with all 16 eliminated players, the person to do it quickest will win.

For this challenge, spelling and punctuation DO MATTER. Capitalization, however, DOES NOT, so don’t worry about capitalizing the book titles if you don’t know how.

YOU MAY NOT EDIT MESSAGES, BUT YOU MAY DELETE THEM IF NEEDED. If you mess up, your score will be set back down to 0 and you will have to start again. We are NOT accepting your highest score, we are accepting the score you leave off on when your five hours are up.

Any further questions can be forwarded to your host or tribe chat! We STRONGLY recommend asking questions before starting so you don’t waste time when you begin.

CHALLENGE FOUR: ON CALL

For the final challenge, you can schedule a time to go on call alone with a host. The challenge will require you to be on cam with your hands showing and will last less than 20 minutes.

What this challenge is will remain a mystery until you are on the call. Once you are done, you are forbidden from discussing the challenge with your tribemates.

Even though it is a mystery, we can confirm that it will not involve any physical or mental endurance. All you must bring is yourself and you do not have to research anything ahead of time. You just have to be able to speak.

Live trivia will not be sent when you are on call for this challenge.

10 points will be handed out for each challenge...

1ST - 5 points

2ND - 3 points

3RD - 2 points

4TH - 0 points

That means a maximum score for this challenge is 20. If there is a tie, we will conduct a live tiebreaker comp on Thursday night!

-The LIVE TRIVIA will begin tonight at 11PM (est).

-Your FLASH GAME screenshot is due by 9PM (est) on Thursday, 8/6.

-You must begin your ENDURANCE by 4PM (est) on Thursday, 8/6 as to ensure you have enough time to compete for five hours.

-The ON CALL challenge can be done with a host whatever time is best for you before 9PM (est) on Thursday, 8/6.

Results will be out the night of Thursday, 8/6, and we will have Final 4 tribal on Friday at 9PM (est)!

Only on more immunity sits between you and the Final 3! Give it your all and good luck!

#themagicawaits

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rebeccadunne · 8 years ago

Text

Your Chroma

by Sinead Gleeson from the latest edition of essential Irish literary journal Gorse

How does it start? The black of pre-consciousness, the pink

of uterine breaths, the red highways of arteries, splayed.

The beginning is red.

Fly over

This country

Of the body.

A spy photographer

On an aerial loop.

There is

breast and

brain and

bladder and

bowel.

Begin the descent to bone.

Dive into fissures of marrow,

To the source,

The red and white cells

of the blood.

Canada,

Japan,

Poland,

Peru.

Venal Vexillology.

III

To put down words about the body—medical, biological,

anatomical—is to present the body as fact. Its being in the

world—a being ‘being’—is irrefutable.

There is a photo of you. Your child body in a red dress at

a trout farm, the brown glitter of a fish wriggling on the

end of the rod’s line. You smile for the camera, and avoid

looking at the bubble of blood at its mouth. Its red gasps.

‘Colour is consciousness itself, colour is feeling,’ said William

Gass, who prioritised blue above red. Blue, he writes, is ‘most

suitable as the colour of interior life.’ Blue, above corporeal

red? What was he thinking?

How do we decide this interior colour? We are one colour in

life, another in death; one in youth, another in old age; one

in sickness, another in good health. We channel Yves Klein

and create a new shade for the interior. A born again hue.

VII

Because of his synaesthesia, Wassily Kandinsky associated

colours with shapes, and sounds. For him, red was a square,

the ‘sound of a loud drum beat.’

VIII

Repeat red over and over—red red red red red red red red

red red red red red red red red red red red red red red red

red red red red red—and it’s a hum, a drill, a drumroll. It is

also not-blue, not-green, not-black, not-white.

In the Tate, Rothko’s reds are dreamlike, hazy around

the edges. Are they on the canvas or under it, bleeding

through?

In an old cinema, long closed down, we watched Derek

Jarman’s Blue. I’m curious about his choice of colour, but

don’t question his motivation to use blue. In his book Chroma,

he says: ‘I know my colours are not yours. Two colours are

never the same, even if they’re from the same tube.’ I think

of his eyes and his failing sight. To be a person who has

spent their life looking, photographing, regarding—and

now cannot see.

You are both redheads, and tell me you like to mark this

by taking photos of the backs of your heads. You do this

in special places. Howth pier, the Cliffs of Moher, various

lighthouses.

XII

There is a black and white photo in a local newspaper,

dating from the 1930s. It’s creased, and heavily pixelated,

with that old photo blur. But it’s him, Red Con. This is the

only photo we’ve tracked down. I’ve never met him, nor has

my father, but we are related. I descend from red hair.

XIII

If blue, as Gass argues, is the colour of interior life, this

makes red a colour of the exterior. But red is the body. Red

is blood, organs, tendons, the red elements:

Rashes

Hives

Sores

The raised bridge of a new scar

Platelets working on the crust of a cut

The speckle of heat rash, like pebbles on the bed of a

stream.

XIV

Driving over the Golden Gate Bridge in a convertible,

sucking in cool Californian air, they argue about the shade

of the steel. Red. Scarlet. Terracotta. Red again, some

consensus. Circular talk of colour under the shadow of

heavy cables, but he knows the bridge’s shade is officially

called ‘International Orange.’ The company that makes the

paint sells a cheaper version called ‘Fireweed.’ He takes this

as a sign to roll a joint and tells his friends that 98% of

people who jump into the bay don’t survive. Those who do

always have the same injuries: broken vertebrae, smashed

ribs, punctured lungs.

You say tomato

I say blood

You say traffic light

I say muscle

You say fire engine

I say vein

XVI

LITTLE

Across the woods, basket swinging on a girlish arm, she

weaves off the path to pick flowers. Hood as protector—

stay hidden, girl, cover yourself up—in a tocsin shade of red.

Anti-camouflage. Here I am, come and get me! it says. And so

the wolf did.

RED

Get up! Her mother pulls the blanket off her teenage bed.

Take this to your granny, and wear your hood, it’s cold. The girl

is menstrual, cramped, innards torn. Her mother relents,

returning with a hot water bottle, and a box of Feminax.

There is a wolf in her womb, and she placates it with hot,

vulcanised rubber and codeine.

RIDING

The girl remarks on the size of her grandmother’s ears, eyes,

and teeth, failing to notice the lupine mouth, the rich pelt,

the cross-dressing, the anthropomorphic imposter in the

bed.

HOOD

In the belly of the wolf, she is safe. She cannot be eaten again.

Consumption saves her from more (male) consumption.

Stay hidden girl. Belly as cave.

XVII

Fairytales are always about women’s bodies. Rapunzel’s hair

and Sleeping Beauty’s somnolent face and Snow White

choking and Cinderella dancing with glass-slippered feet.

XVIII

Not glass slippers, but her aunt buys her red clogs, the first

shoes she ever loves. The heavy wooden stomp on the

concrete of the street, the scarlet curve of the leather a

possibility. She learns that women are meant to wear heels;

that heels appear to lengthen a woman’s leg, to accentuate

her calf, to make her more attractive. She decides she will

only wear clogs, or no shoes at all.

XVIX

Four women in black body con dresses gyrate to a 1980s

song. Robert Palmer, dressed like someone’s office manager

dad rolls through Addicted to Love. The women are heavily

made up, their eye shadow a palette of storm-cloud colours,

but it’s their lipstick I’m obsessed with: my mother’s matt

pinks and creamy browns having nothing on this. This red is

a declaration of war. The gloss is so high it looks like glass.

I practise on my lips with saliva. The models are arranged

democratically, two either side of Palmer. The only contrast

in uniformity is their faces and length of their dresses. Their

whiteness is a shock, the scraped-back hair severe. These

porcelain-faced, storm-eyed she-tomatons are part homage

to Art Deco painter Patrick Nagel’s women. The shock and

sheen of their scarlet lips is the only thing that interrupts their

monochrome faces. Is it because it’s the ’80s that the scene

is so homogenous, so lacking in multiculturalism? White

bodies the epitome of capitalism, even in pop music.

How should we present our face to the world?

How should we present our (female) face to the world?

Make-upped, pore-blocked in shades of ivory and sand.

Brow-arched, lash-lacquered, glitter-lidded. Branded by

brands.

XXI

We used to paint our lips with whale blubber, but now it’s

mostly wax and oils. I have yet to find the perfect shade of

red lipstick. Too orange, too ephemeral, too knife slash.

XXII

I once worked as editor of a spa magazine. I wrote dull

copy about acrylic nails and Glycolic peels, and was sent

endless products: emery boards and seaweed unguents,

poultices and tanning sprays; exfoliation aids in wood and

sisal. I interviewed a woman who gave facials with coloured

oils selected for a person’s mood and personality. Part spa

treatment, part mystical woo. In her tiny salon, above a pub,

she told me about oneness and inner beauty, self-examination

and higher powers. After a pause in her well-rehearsed pitch,

she pointed to a fleshy bump on my forehead and said:

Would you not get that removed?

XXIII

In 1967, Irish-born writer Lucy Grealy moved to the US

with her family. Life opened up with possibility, but aged

nine she was diagnosed with Ewing’s Sarcoma, a rare facial

cancer. Grealy endured thirty operations, radiation and

chemotherapy. In Autobiography of a Face, her novelistic

memoir, she writes: ‘This singularity of meaning—I was

my face, I was ugliness—though sometimes unbearable, also

offered a possible point of escape. It became the launching

pad from which to lift off, the one immediately recognisable

place to point to when asked what was wrong with my life.

Everything led to it, everything receded from it—my face as

personal vanishing point.’

XXIV

I have never broken a limb, even if my bones are

troublesome.

I have never needed stitches because of a cut.

I have never exposed my insides except for surgical

wounds.

My skin resealed with metal, paper and thread.

XXV

When my teenage hip started to disintegrate, baffled doctors

kept asking increasingly random questions:

Did you fall?

(Who doesn’t?)

Have you ever been knocked down by a car? (Once, but the driver

was going slow and we lived in a cul-de-sac.)

Have you ever had a tropical disease? (Can you get one from

going to Spain?)

Have you ever been bitten by an animal or strange creature? (I tell

him about Lough Derg.)

XXVI

At Dromineer, Lough Derg was like a beach. I swam out

far from the shore to float in the navy current that skirted

the lake like isobars. Swimming back, I stood when the

water was knee high, and felt a sharp pinch on my foot. It

wasn’t glass, and felt more like a bite, but I couldn’t see what

lurked beneath. I thought of monsters and sea demons, the

creature of the lake. There are not enough horror films set

underwater.

XXVII

A hotel exterior, painted walls, a fleeing woman in a scarlet

coat, the vertical lines of blood on a hanging woman’s legs, a

nosebleed, a trickle from a mouth. In Suspiria, Dario Argento

reminds us that we bleed; that the body is vulnerable—not

just to psychologies and fear—but to knives and violence.

The body is the ultimate horror setting.

XXVIII

I look at the mottled skin at your back as a forensic scientist

examines blood splatter.

XXIX

After major surgery:

I wake up to find my skin yellow and assume this is iodine

or antiseptic used to prep the body for being opened to the

elements.

I wake up to find that this yellow is not an ointment, but

bruising, from the pressure of knives, the kneading of

hands.

I wake up to red and yellow patches, pools of colour, the

body’s semaphore.

I wake up during hip replacement surgery and feel strong

hands shoving, the weight of arms, a rearrangement.

Who’s pushing me? I ask, before the anaesthetist tops up

the spinal block, shoving me back under the waves.

XXX

Arthritis and surgery withered my bones. My left leg is

thinner than the right, full of metal and scars. Frida Kahlo’s

right leg was thinner than her left, a result of childhood polio.

Kahlo painted not just her body, not just pain, but body and

pain united. Exposed spinal columns, a womb that triggered

miscarriages, herself pierced by nails in multiple works. In

her diary, she wrote: ‘I am DISINTEGRATION.’

XXXI

Eventually Kahlo’s leg was amputated below the knee and

in 1953, a year before her death, she had a prosthetic limb

made. A laced-platform boot with Chinese embroidery in

red leather. Red as defiance, and for the body and for all the

blood she’d shed.

XXXII

For nearly three months, I wore a cast that covered most

of me. When it was removed, the skin had piled up, and

looked like wax. The sediment of immobility. Removing it

was like rubbing smudges on a windowpane. I felt like a

snake shedding its skin.

XXXIII

Bones are hard as rock but our edges—skin, lids—are not

shores. The body is an island of sorts, containing several

isthmuses, in the throat, fallopian tube, prostate, thyroid,

urethra, aorta, uterus. Body as outpost, as tidal island.

XXXIV

In Northern Ireland we pass bays and inlets, but also red

phone boxes, red postboxes. Imperial, post-Colonial red.

The red stripe of St George’s flag, many Red Hands of

Ulster.

XXXV

I think of you as though you are a map. Of the contours of

your jaw, the hill of your back, the compass of your arms. I

see them now, at 10 and 2, an almost-Jesus on a cross. I try

to imagine your body at 11:11, or 12:34.

XXXVI

We play The Alphabet Body game and you laugh when I get

Z. What about Zinn’s Zonule? I offer, but you think I’m making

it up. The suspensory ligament holding the crystalline lens

of the eye in place. It’s not immediately tangible; there are

no children’s flash cards like there are for eye or mouth.

Zygomatic Bone you say, and ask me its location. It sounds like

zygote, so I guess it is uterine or cervical. I’ll answer by kissing

you there you say, and brush your lips against my cheekbone.

XXXVII

After the birth of my daughter, by C-section, my husband

said he looked up at the wrong time and saw my intestines.

The operating theatre floor looked like a murder had been

committed. And you were red too on the outside, viscous

and slippery as albumen, but your skin was blue, your lungs

working to inflate.

XXXVIII

After the birth of my son, he weighs no more than a couple

of bags of sugar, but I cannot pick him up. A new pain

in my wrist is intense, and feels close to the surface, like

someone tipping a scalding cup over it. I take a glass lift five

floors to see a man who will fix it. De Quervain’s Syndrome,

he says. Can you get it from lifting babies, who are light,

almost not there? Two tendons wrap around each other in a

red embrace. One surgical slit with a scalpel, like a ribbon-

cutting ceremony and it will be free. This injury is also called

Washerwoman’s Sprain (not Washerman’s).

XXXIX

The patron saint of childbirth, St. Margaret of Antioch, was

a committed virgin. Tortured for her faith, her flesh slashed

with nails, she was given the title after an encounter with

a dragon. The creature swallowed her whole, so Margaret

made the sign of the cross and promptly burst out of its

stomach, Alien-style. (Film critic Mark Kermode once said

that Alien is a film about male fear of childbirth).

I know a girl with Rosacea, which makes me think of

‘Rosary,’ not red. The skin is affected with papules and

pustules, reminding me of holy beads. I love these words

for awful things, and the galaxy of red under the moons of

her eyes.

XLI

You do not own your body if you live in this country. Your

womb is not under your control. Legislation owns your

ovaries. Lawyers lay claim to your fallopian tubes. The

government pays stamp duty on your cervix.

XLII

Tick tock, women’s body clocks.

Have a baby even though you’re not ready.

Have a baby when you can’t afford a home.

Have a baby when you’ve been raped.

Have a baby because you can’t afford the airfare to London

or Liverpool.

Have a baby between twenty and thirty-four, it’s the optimum

fertility window, they

keep

reminding

us.

The ticking of ovaries, your body as timepiece, swinging on

a chain.

XLIII

Heads, shoulders, knees and toes, knees and toes.

HIPS! TITS! LIPS! POWER! (REPEAT)

XLIV

Once you enter the medical system, there are rooms and

hospital numbers, blue disposable gowns and Styrofoam

cups. There are people speaking—always speaking—asking

questions, taking details. The body you think of as yours

is not private. It is in the system, on charts, in operating

theatres. Your body needs to take the lift to x-ray. Your body

needs to drink more fluids. Your body needs to come back

in three months. Your body is ours.

XLV

Just before her lumpectomy, photographer Jo Spence wrote

on her left breast: Property of Jo Spence? The question mark is

defiant and panic-stricken. The need to hold on to this part

of herself. To assert autonomy, even over the toxic growth

in her chest. To have a say in her own medical life. Later,

post-lumpectomy, Spence is photographed in profile, breast

puckered and scarred. Wearing a crash helmet, the image is

uncompromising. Come at me, it says.

XLVI

In the hospital, you are not supposed to use your hands.

In the bathroom, toilets flush and taps spill and blue

paper towels dispense with the wave of a sensor. Germs,

cleanliness, DO NOT TOUCH. The ward is a bubble,

confined and contained, and I feel like Margaret Atwood’s

‘Girl Without Hands.’

No one can enter that circle

you have made, that clean circle

of dead space you have made

and stay inside,

mourning because it is clean.*

XLVII

He used to give himself stigmata. Burning the hollow of his

hand with cigarettes. Pressing the red sieve tip into his heart

line, head line, life line. This is for you, he said, but I know it

connected him to himself.

XLVIII

The Catholic Church’s list of notable stigmatics is comprised

mostly of women, including St. Catherine of Siena. Born in

the mid-fourteenth century, she believed she was married

to Jesus, and that her (invisible) wedding ring was made of

his foreskin. Her stigmatic wounds were visible only to her,

and she suffered from anaemia. Every day, she fasted and

engaged in self-flagellation until she drew blood. In one of

many letters to her confessor, Raymond of Capua, she spoke

of a vision where she leads her followers into the wound in

Christ’s side, guiding an army into his blood.

XLIX

My birthday is the anniversary of the death of St. Ignatius

Loyola. Once a soldier, he was shot through the hip,

shattering his leg. I’ve never gone to war or been beatified.

There is no redness in death. Maybe this is where William

Gass’ interior blue comes in. But the body turns many

colours at the end: white, grey, blue, purple, a tinge of green.

The body spent and stopped and still is not red.

But when will the red stop?

When will I die?

When will you?

#sinead gleeson #gorse #literary journal #writing #new irish writing #irish #your chroma #red

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polyamradiotranscripts · 7 years ago

Text

Ep.4 Polysaturation

polyAM Radio Episode Four-Polysaturation

[Begin Transcript]

[Sophie]: Hello everybody and welcome to polyam radio the best show on the internet about polyamory that weird relationship thing you do with lots of other people

["Crazy little thing called love" by Queen plays]

[Sophie]: Hello everybody and welcome my name is Sophie Last-name-redacted

[Mara]: and I'm Mara Fake-last-name

[Sophie]: you are listening to polyAM radio which you already know because the intro just played

[Mara]: [laughs] just to remind you real quick about pronouns this is Mara's voice I use they them their pronouns

[Sophie]: this is Sophie I use she hers, Mara

[Mara]: yeah Sophie what's your problem

[Sophie]: wow, okay

[Mara]: [laughs]

[Sophie]: umm soo, uh yeah I got a problem though

[Mara]: whats your problem Sophie

[Sophie]: I got, ya know, the holidays are comin up

[Mara]: oh I know

[Sophie]: and uh ya know candlenights is great uh for those mbmbam beanos who celebrate it but uh I got a problem with presants

[Mara]: mmm, mhmm

[Sophie]: I got too many partners Mara, I got too many presants to buy for too many partners

[Mara]: I haven't even started yet Sophie

[Sophie]: oh god, see I'm making some of the gifts for some of my partners soo

[Mara]: and you're only starting now

[Sophie]: no no I already have started well I've started some of them now I've started one

[Mara]: Sophie there's only thirty four days 'till christmas

[Sophie]: oh god

[Mara]: thankfully candlenights is whenever you want it to be

[Mara]: [laughs]

[Sophie]: [laughs] I guess uhh ya know I uh I recently was talking online to some people about people that start their podcasts by doing skits and I'm not a huge fan of it just cause it feels really fake but umm ya know whereas we just normally just kinda pick a topic and go from there but I gotta say that I definitely see the appeal of avoiding a long awkward silence like that

[Mara]: yeah uh-huh having something scripted would really help with that instead of just pulling something out of our asses just now

[Sophie]: yeah that was supposed to be a long and entertaing bit about how hard it is to get christmas presants and stuff like that when you have so many partners and ya know whatnot uhh but

[Mara]: but we suck

[Sophie]: yeah we're not that good at this yet, I got to say I do want to say one thing I guess umm it's starting to feel real for me this podcast uhh I was on ya know I download the podcast and I listen to it actually the same as y'all are listening to it umm

[Mara]: I don't know how you can listen to yourself

[Sophie]: I acutally really

[Mara]: I hate it [laughs]

[Sophie]: I actually really enjoy it because I feel like it makes me better uhh because I can ya know if I listen to it a few times or whatever I can be really critical of myself and say okay these are things I need to do better

[Mara]: I don't know how yall are listening to my nasally Wisconsin accent Im sorry

[Sophie]: oh my gosh

[Mara]: oh my gosh

[Sophie]: oh my gosh

[Mara]: that can't be real plesant so props to you for listening I guess

[Sophie]: yeah but so I do listen to it and ummm ya know I was listening to some of the previous episodes and whatnot umm I was listening to some of the previous episodes and ya know it's starting to feel real like there's enough ya know episodes now that I have to scroll through my ya know in the podcast app on apple and uhh on like spreaker where we host it there's like three episodes now and we're recording the fourth and it's starting to feel like we actually got something here

[Mara]: it's pretty cool

[Sophie]: yeah like this isn't just something like ohh we're going to start and it's not going to take off and everything it feels real and kinda good

[Mara]: yeah yeah

[Sophie]: I'm really happy with how this project has turned out I hope you all are umm we actually our next episode is gonna be a little weird uh it's gonna be uh what did you call it Mara

[Mara]: happy poly day

[Sophie]: happy poly days yeah and it's basically gonna be about all the holiday struggles uh taht people have when they're poly and stuff like that so everything from uh what gifts to get for what partners and how to afford all of them to

[Mara]: families

[Sophie]: yeah families and this person is a really big part of my life and how do I introduce them as my roomate or something like that

[Mara]: or do I introduce them to my family too

[Sophie]: yeah I gotta say I am there's this couple I'm dating right now umm who are some of the most fantastic people in the world uhh and one of whom transcribes the show and is blushing hardcore right now as she hears this but umm they're just they're they haven't been in my life for all that long umm but they're really important to me and it's actually difficult kinda going into the holiday season like I wish that umm ya know I could introduce them to my family and everything and be like ya know both of them to my family and be like hey uh ya know these are some people that are really important in my life and I wish that with all my partners but I'm feeling that really hard with two people in particular right it's it's just kinda hitting me close to home umm not to say that I don't feel that way about the rest of my partners of course I don't wanna set up some weird dichotomy or whatever umm

[Mara]: if you have any uhh holiday struggles feel free to send those in to use

[Sophie]: oh got yess that would be marvelous

[Mara]: so it's not just us talking because we're two people and we have not experienced everything there is to experience in the world so tell us your poly-days struggles

[Sophie]: yeah especially about like coming out to your family as poly and stuff like that

[Mara]: cause neither of us have done that

[Sophie]: yeah neither of us have done that uhh we just have kinda chosen not too uhh our family's are on the conservative side and are barely okay with me being trans uhh like so

[Mara]: yeah we'll just leave that for now

[Sophie]: yeah they're like barely okay with a binary trans girl never the less a uh an enby so

[Mara]: which they don't even know about

[Sophie]: yeah so the fact that ya know we just kinda choose not to go there cause we don't want it to get ugly at ya know christmas and for the rest of our years be the ones who ruined the christmas of seventeen or whatever

[Mara]: [laughs]

[Sophie]: so we're just we're not dealing with it and that's our choice and it's valid and if that's your choice then it's valid too but if you have funny stories or uhh lots of experience and stuff like that it would be really cool to hear from you you can tweet at us you've got two hundred and eighty characters now so what more could you need it's @PolyAM_Radio with an underscore in there capital 'p' 'am' and 'r' or you could send us an email at polyamradio all lowercase all one word at gmail dot com uhh you've actually got that information on the cover art of your umm of this podcast now I put it on there when I updated it so it's pretty cool stuff

[Mara]: you should also check out our facebook page if you're not on those other websites as well

[Sophie]: we're gonna plug all the stuff again at the end of the episode so there's that to look forward to

[Mara]: [laughs]

[Sophie]: umm but so like I said at the begining of the episode and our ya know umm and I I guess what probably should have been a skit but kinda wasn't umm

[Mara]: that's just awkardly rambling

[Sophie]: ya know I'm having some problems with gift giving lately and uhh we actually got an email from someone who has a bit of a problem giving a gift of their own vis a vis love uhh ya know mentioned in a previous episode love is like a gift and you can keep giving it as long as you have resources to give those gifts and everthing kind of spoons and money and everthing and they actually emailed uh this person and with a really heartfelt and beautiful email I thought and uhh well why don't you read it Mara cause it was so moving we wanted to do an entire episode devoted to the topic with it

[Mara]: and I'm so so excited send us emails I think this is real real cool

[Sophie]: yeah absolutely we've gotten ya know this is only the third email we've ever gotten so this is real real exciting for us

[Mara]: Sophie and Mara let me first just say that I am so excited about PolyAM_Radio I've recently been exploring myself as a polyamours individual and it's scary at times listening to your show eases the fear and helps me to know what is healthy and valid this being said I need some advice ever since discovering that monogamy is not for me I have been falling in love with what seems to be everyone I know I can't give everone christmas gifts but gee it sure is hard to decide who I want to give my gifts to and how many I understand the answer varies from person to person and I already have a pretty busy life however I was wondering if you could tell me a general number that seems to work for you and others you know how many partner is too many how can I make sure that if I have multiple partners they're all getting the love and attention they deserve, enamored in Eagleton

[Sophie]: I'm gonna go and, wel they're probably too old now because the Matrix is an old movie but I'm gonna go find the bald white child umm from the Matrix the I think the second movie that was that

[Mara]: there is no spoon

[Sophie]: yeah there is no number

[Mara]: [laughs]

[Sophie]: there is no right number which makes this kind of a hard question to answer because I can't just be like six, or whatever umm

[Mara]: holy shit yeah there are probably people out there with six partner but for me oooh

[Sophie]: I uh I did the math I actually have six partner right now

[Mara]: oh my god you're nuts

[Sophie]: yeah so we're going to get into the number in just a minute here but uh we just want to mention a few things first like I said the reference to giving a gift and everthing uh giving everyone christmas gifts it's a refernce to a previous episode we talked about love is not a pie that you slice up love is a gift and you can give anyone a gift and people are just thankfull for the gifts that they get they're not like ooh I didn't get as many as them or whatever and that's important if you don't understand that what the fuck are you doing you're listning to the episodes in the wront order smack uhh I also wanted to uh there is no wrong number so I guess ya know I'll kinda edit out the five minutes you need to do the math on your fingers but how many partner do you have right now

[Mara]: I can confidently say I have three partners uhh four if you count some more causal comittments that I have that I haven't necceicarily moved forward with I have a couple of comets in my life so this be people who I don't see all that often but when I do it's great it's fun it's really nice so I think I will I'm I'm like ninety five percent certain taht I'm not leaving anybody out when I say I have three partners that I'm pretty comitted to right now

[Sophie]: yeah I umm right now I have uhh I would say four very comitted partners and then I have uhh like at least two if not three kind of comets like we talk about people who are kind of just on your peripherary it's not a super comitted thing it's not a super hardcore thing but when they're around you have a lot of fun and uhh ya know it's it's a really cool thing and that doesn't mean that the relationship is worth less or anything like that but if we're just doing like total numbers of partners I do have six or seven partners right now that's not including like people that I would just have casual sex with or whatever all though I don't really think there's anybody I have casual sex with right now ya know that's not including play partners or anything like that, that's like partners partners

[Mara]: for sure uhh and the most amount of partners I've ever had at a time has been five, five, and that was way too many for me umm that was way too many for me unfortunately it didn't end very well I was I wasn't giving people the amount of attention they deserved and I ended up going to partners and kinda saying hey I'm really sorry I got kinda swept up in this new relationship energy or I've just been so busy with other things that I haven't been able to give you the attention you deserve and I'm sorry, most of them are pretty understanding ya know they appriciated me coming to them and saying hey I'm really polysaturated and I'm trying to work on this but I need to just kind of ya know take a second and re-address some of these comittments that I've made so that it's fair and that I'm giving you the attention that I can and the attention that you want from me

[Sophie]: yeah absolutely I umm right now this is actually the most number of partn- ya know the greatest number of partners that I've ever had that having been said it doesn't feel like that right now because there was a time about a year ago I think or maybe a little less where, man, that really felt like I was just uh I mean I felt like ten pounds of shit in a five pound bag I mean I was just ripping at the seams uhh just with ya know how much and and how many uhh ya know partners I had and and how stretched thin I was to make sure everybody got time and eventually I kind of ya know grew into it and everything and ended up aquiring some more ya know some people come or some people became a little more tangential in my life some people ya know left some people came in umm so I don't wanna make it seem like I'm streched super thin right now because I don't presonally feel that way I don't necceicarily think I'd want to go adding another five or six right now ya know that seems like a lot uhh but ya know I I'm not at what I would call critical mass right now which is a good place to not be umm there's actually a word though for that feeling like you're just gonna burst at the seams like you're being pulled in a million different directions at once and that's called polysaturation umm and so we got this email about it like I said and uh we thought that polysaturation was important enough that we wanted to do a whole episode on it so tell me a little bit about polysaturation Mara

[Mara]: yeah uhh so it's kinda like you said when it when it's that feeling of being stretched too thin it's ya know you don't feel like you're getting the quality time that you want with your partners and you feel like they're not getting the quality time they deserve umm and I think the hardest thing about this is at different points in my life I'm a student right now I've mentioned that before I'm a student and I work and I'm getting ready to apply to grad school which is a big scary thing so the amount of time that I have during different times of the year vary and the summer I have a lot more time as opposed to like ya know right up against finals like we are right now it just it varies so I know that at different points in my life like ya know it's there are times where there's too many and right now the number that I'm at I'm super comfy ya know I know that even if I do get really busy even if I do have that time crunch I'm gonna be able to give the time and attention to my partners that they deserve uhh but it is a problem and it is something that I've dealt with before like I was talking about earlier when I was polysaturated ya know it it took a toll on a couple of my relationships and it was it was a really crappy feeling coming to my partners and saying hey I've been kind of neglecting you and I'm sorry that was something that's really really hard but ya know being able to talk to those partners really helped me to make sure that they were getting the attention that they deserved because if you don't talk to your partners you don't know what they need ya know it it's one of those talk to your partner moments

[Sophie]: you gotta commuunniicattee [drawn out]

[Mara]: you gotta commuunniicattee [drawn out] exactly it's ya know it it's really important to be on the same page as all of your partners and I think that's the best answer I have to your question how can you make sure that all of your partners are getting the love and attention that they deserve, talk to your partners know the level of comittment that they want know the level of comittment you want and then try to structure your relationships around that ya know I think umm unfortunately there's not a good way to know when when you hit peak partners until you're sitting there and you're like well fuck ya know just a trial and error ohh no I've done it again [laughs]

[Sophie]: well and I think part of the problem ya know there's not really ever in your life gonna be a rule as far as ya know oh well this is how many partners I can have because part of it a lot of it has to do in my experience with how many or or pardon me not how many partners uhh you have but with kind of who the partners are and how much attention they require and how much ya know how often they kinda wanna see you and are able to see you ya know uhh I date primarialy other students and what not or people who have been students uhh just that's who I'm dating right now and ya know I gotta say they're pretty understanding for the most part of my time and when I don't have much but ya know a lot of times I mean I see Mara every day because we live together ya know we're nesting partners we wake up next to each other umm ya know frankly if it wasn't Mara if it was someone else this would be a nightmare frankly but Mara's just special and wonderful ya know I'm able to do it, there are other partners I have where I'll go days without talking to them and that's fine, that's not a problem, uhh especially the long distance ones or whatever and then there are sometimes where we'll talk for hours and hours in a day ya know you kinda block your time like that ya know but even just this weekend I was studying for a huge exam that was monday night and I didn't really see you almost all weekend and especially the day of the exam monday I mean it was an evening exam so I basically like you came and saw me in the library at one point but ya know I just didn't have time and that's okay that's not a bad thing so ya know my partners for the most part understand where I'm coming from and where I'm at so I can have more because they're so understaning and because they're usually by in large or at least lately they're usually pretty low maintainence umm people that need more from you that require more from you that is absolutely fine that does not make them bad or toxic but you will be able to have less which again is fine more isn't better but ya know they're going to require more time and more energy and more spoons and more everything from you so that's going to affect your number too umm Mara even said it it also differs ya know the time of year over the summer and over the winter man I can have a million fuckin partners I'd be soo like ya know I'm just swimming in time and then the second the semester starts up again I'm in hell

[Mara]: [laughs]

[Sophie]: I'm in absolute hell and ya know I've had problems with that before ya know with getting in too deep during some of the off months and then going ohh tits

[Sophie]: [laughs]

[Sophie]: this wasn't I don't know why I thought this was sustainible but it is not and hindsight is great but now I have this cool thing that I don't want to end how do I resolve that

[Mara]: well and unfortunately in my experience a lot of it is just it's trial and error it's umm to thine own self be true a little bit know what you're capable of know what you want poly is polyam excuse me is a lot of work truly I think a lot of people look at polyamory like it's the the lazy I wanna avoid comittment thing to do but truly you are actively choosing and actively pursuing comittments with so many other people and so you're sitting there and you need to think about things a lot harder than you do in uhh at least I feel you have to think about things a lot harder than you do in monogamous relationships you need to have a lot of self refelction and that's hard and you're gonna make mistakes and they're gonna suck, making mistakes sucks, in my experience as, speaking as somebody who's made more than their share of mistakes, mistakes suck and they hurt and it might cause break ups to happen and that's not fun and we can probably do a whole episode on polyamorous break ups, but

[Sophie]: damn that's ac- that would be really good I don't have that, I have a list on my phone of episodes that I want to do and that's not on there and that would be really good actually that would be really good

[Mara]: yeah I feel like we could do just, we could talk into your ears for another full forty mintues or however long we tend to go about what breaking up when polyamorous is like

[Sophie]: well especially because recently and ya know it's still pretty fresh it still hurts a lot umm the truth of the matter is a few months ago we had a nesting partner leave us and it wasn't pretty, it was someone who we had comitted to heavily and who we kind of thought was always gonna be in our lives and umm ya know we gave them a comittment symbol and they literally in the they threw it out ya know and umm ya know it was it was hard on everybody and I'm not gonna sit here and slander anybody but uhh ya know that is kinda something we went through

[Mara]: yeah there there was a lot going on there to be sure but umm so anyways yeah no like know yourself talk to your partner and also this is the best the single best piece of advice I have ever been given by someone else who is polyamour it was actually uhh one of my current partners you have to treat yourself like you are dating yourself, you need to know when you need you time you need to know when you need to be maybe with this one partner maybe not spending so much time with this other partner and you need to be with other people who are good communitaters it's it's really important to surround yourself with with people who aren't toxic for you and and someone being toxic doesn't necceicarily mean that they're a bad person it just means that they're not the right person for you and so you need to be aware of that but I guess my best piece of advice is as you meet people you can add relationships I don't think I know anybody who ya know discovers that they are a polyamorous individual and then goes out in one day and comes back with five relationships that's not in my experience how relationships work and it might be for some people but I think often times it's this process of getting to know people

[Sophie]: [Mara]: [singing] geting to know you, getting to know all about you

[Sophie]: can you tell I don't know the song very well

[Mara]: [laugh] umm can you tell that I was a theatere kid in high school, probably um but you ya know you get to know people you get to know their relational style because everyone has different relationship sytles everybody has different umm I know there are people out there who don't think that the love languages exist or are a smart thing or whatever I personally like that I think it's a useful of explaining the way that people give and show love ya know and I umm I'm very much a quality time person, I I wanna spend time with people but if you know you're a quality time person and you are with somebody who is a words of affirmation person you need to learn how to relate to them or maybe that doesn't work for you and that's okay you just need to know that , so ya know know yourself as hard as that is to do uhh spend some time dating yourself getting to know what you want and what's important to you in a relationship

[Sophie]: yeah and I think that's really good advice uhh ya know and again I try to ya know this is a show by polyamorous people for polyamours people but I always hope there are things in here that anyone can take away that monogamous people can take away, that aromantic people can take away, umm ya know uhh and I think that really whenever you're in a realtionship ever you should always say yes I'm dating this person but I'm also dating myself or I'm not dating anyone but I'm also dating myself because you have to put time and energy and active thought into a relationship and you should treat yourself with time and energy and active thought you should be treating yourself well so I gotta ask ya know after all this uhh is this, how real is this problem, how serious is this and how serious should we be taking it uhh ya know is this something like new relationship energy where it's kinda a minor problem and it can make you do some foolish things and it can get you into a little bit of troube but it's not that serious as long as you know it's there and look out for it, is this something that it can really start to impeade your life if you don't pay attention to it or is this something that in your opinion doesn't realy cause a lot of problems

[Mara]: I think it's something that can really really mess with your life and it in any relationship ya know monogamous or friendship or whatever if you're neglecting somebody if you're not spending time with somebody you're just kinda like oh yeah yeah we're in a relationship but I don't have to spend time with you right I don't have to talk to you or give you any attention that's that's bad, that's bad for your partners that's bad for you and I think it is, it's a real problem I think ya know before it escalates to it it absolutely is ya know kinda like new relationship energy and being aware and wow I'm being a dumbass right now and I need to check myself before wreck myself kinda thing

[Sophie]: yeah absolutely I think that it's a lot like being stressed out or having a panic attack, it doesn't necceicarily it ya know it doesn't neccecitate that there is something wrong things could be fine there might not be a problem but even if there's not whatever the situation is you're not handling it and a change needs to be made even just for your health and well being even if you're not currently neglecting your partners you are stressed out about this and doing something different would probably be good that doesn't neccecarily mean ending the relationships but probably at this point certainly not starting any new ones right I mean

[Mara]: yeah

[Sophie]: if you're feeling polysaturated the best thing to do is give yourself some times say okay I'm not gonna date anybody new and if you meet somebody amazing and if you fall in love and if it's perfect and if and if and if tell them hey listen I just ya know I really like you but I just got into this new relationship and it's taking a lot of my time and energy and I want to be with you but we gotta put it on hold because I just need some time to adjust to this new thing and figure out where it's going and what's gonna happen ya know versus just ya know devil may care jumping into a new thing I think that's really foolish personally umm, is there a kinda of a a solution a cure-all a ya know cure-all cure nothing as they always say in sawbones but umm,

[Mara]: you're such a dork

[Sophie]: [laughs] I'm a McElroy fangirl I can't help it

[Mara]: ya know what it's okay because when we were talking about ya know if theres a rule as to how many people I almost said ya know it's not like a rule of two kind of thing

[Sophie]: [yells] yes! you don't even like star wars

[Mara]: no I'm just around it all the god damn time

[Sophie]: yes

[Mara]: [laughs]

[Sophie]: Mara isn't even in to star wars, they've just absorbed enough about the Banite Sith to know that the rule of two is like a really big deal from me reading the novels if you haven't read them go out and read Drew Kapershick's Darth Bane trilogy path of desctruction, rule of two, dynasty of evil it's amazing and then read Darth Plageius by James Lucino, holy crap mind blowing books, really really well written umm and if you like star wars at all you'll love these books the audio books on audible are amazing, they're not paying me to say that I'm just a fan

[Mara]: you're trash

[Sophie]: I'm trash

[Mara]: [laughs]

[Sophie]: I'm absolute trash

[Mara]: is is there a solution,commuunniicattee [drawn out]

[Sophie]: you gotta commuunniicattee [drawn out]

[Mara]: you gotta commuunniicattee [drawn out] yeah no talk to your partners know yourself, refelct [laughs] ya know uh think before you snack, act

[Sophie]: think before you snak

[Mara]: it's from mulan when she's got the umm caligraphy on her arm and shes

[Sophie]: ohhh

[Mara]: reciting the final admonition I'm also a huge Disney nerd umm but yeah ya know think think before your snack, act

[Sophie]: [coughs]

[Mara]: yeah no it's kinda we we've covered the solution a couple of times throughout the podcast, know yourself, know your partners, just spend some time thinking about what you need to do

[Sophie]: yeah and and I think that ya know I would say if I had to give a solution mine would probably be treat it like stress because that's really what it is it's just stress about the relationships and about being streched to thin and generally speaking when I feel stressed I often feel like I don't have enough time for anything and that's really really really bad because the soulution to that is to take more time to do things and to move very deliberately through your life

[Mara]: mhmmm

[Sophie]: umm take more time to do basic self care I'm not talking about giving yourself a fun ya know a bath with rose petals in there I'm talking about showering with a fucking uhh pumice stone and scraping three weeks of dead skin off your arms I'm talking about eating at all, I'm talking about drinking water, enough of it, you need to take more time to do these things when you're stressed, not less, you need to take more time to study if you're stressed about school than when you're not stressed and it often feels like you don't have any time and you can't do these things, that is your brain lying to you because it thinks you're being chased by a tiger and that you're going to die, my grandfather had a saying uhh that he he was a cartoonist and he used to write this saying on everything umm and ya know I think he had a really interesting perspective because he was I'm not big on the military I'm not big on imperialism and and and stuff like that but he was in the military uhh he was in the Korean conflict and umm [laughs] actually in his old age he used to say that he didn't wanna go on walks because he walked across Korea and that was enough for anybody, regardless he had a saying that the way to relieve yourself of a burden is not by refusing to carry it

[Mara]: mhmm

[Sophie]: the best way to relieve yourself of a burden is not by refuling to carry is the way to relieve yourself of this stress with this relationship is not by refusing to carry it and it's not by just saying oh well I'll give my partners more time and I'll spend more time and I'll go on more dates, no, the way to relieve yourself of it is to do the uncomfortable thing talk to your partners and then sink more time into yourself because chances are if you're feeling polysaturated the one who's not getting enough time more than anyone else is actually you, okay, and I'll just say that out there because pretty much anytime when you feel streched too thin by comittments and stuff like that and ogbligations generally speaking we drop things that we need first and it's important to take care of yourself and do the things that you need to do to keep going and to subsist

[Mara]: well and and Sophie you're kind of a ch-emist

[Sophie]: I am indeed a ch-emist ch-emistry

[Mara]: ch-emistry umm but

[Sophie]: I'm a bio ch-emist

[Mara]: you're a ch-emist [laughs]

[Sophie]: I wish I was a ch-emist I'm a wannabe ch-emist, chemist chemist for those of you who are having trouble figuring that out

[Mara]: with saturation when a solution is saturated it means that there's too much of one of the uhh of the solvent, no the solvent is the thing that, can you tell that I'm real real bad at chemistry

[Sophie]: can you tell that I'm not helping and that I'm just gonna let you flounder

[Mara]: uhh

[Sophie]: so when a solution reaches saturation I just said I wasn't gonna help, umm but when a solution reaches saturation basically you have your solution and you have your solute

[Mara]: solute! that's the word

[Sophie]: [crosstalk] and your solute is what is dissolved in the solution, and basically at that point you cannot get any more solute into that amount of solution it won't dissolve anymore it's just going to sit there at the bottom of the beaker stubbornly and not dissolve and you need to do one of two things if you want to get away from saturation and I think Mara's gonna talk about it

[Mara]: No I was gonna ask you what you do I just you really you kinda stole that from me

[Sophie]: sorry

[Mara]: I was trying to be clever

[Sophie]: I'm sorry I get really excited about ch-emistry

[Mara]: so what do you do when a solution is uhh saturated

[Sophie]: you can do one of three things, umm the first thing you can do is find a way to remove some of the excess solute that's in there by filtration or something like that remove some of the stressor, in our analogy, another thing you can do is add more solution if you have something that is taking up your time and whatnot and you lets say it's school and you graduate from school and all the sudden it's ah I've got so much more time it's wonderfull, great, you can sink that into your relationships if you want, you've added more to the solution, the third thing you can do is heat up the solution because a greater amount of free energy in the solution will result in a greater amount of uhh ya know solute being able to dissolve in there, I don't really know how that applies

[Mara]: set the things that are taking your time on fire

[Sophie]: yeah for sure

[Mara]: set it on fire

[Sophie]: light your obligations on fire

[Mara]: [laughs]

[Sophie]: I will say that it's actually very interesting

[Mara]: don't do that please don't do that

[Sophie]: yeah please yeah please don't do that

[Mara]: for the love of god no

[Sophie]: I do wanna mention there is something that can happen only with certain solutes in certain solutions uhh but you can reach a point called super saturation if you heat it up dissolve more than is natural to be in there more than is uhh kind of chemically comfortable to be in the solution you can reach a point of super saturation and then everythings fine as it slowly cools down and you can go type in super saturation into youtube and look this up but any disturbance say a finger poke in the top will cause tons of solute to spontaneously umm uhh umm uhh word to spontaneously percipitate out of solution wow I went to college to get stupid I guess, uhh but basically the metaphor equivalant of that will be is that if you try to super saturate your life it'll end poorly and I'll have like very little sympathy for you cause like I warned ya and you heard it on the podcast

[Mara]: so don't light your obligations on fire

[Sophie]: please please don't do that thing

[Mara]: uh oh

[Sophie]: oh go for it sorry

[Mara]: did, do you hear that

[quiet klaxon sounds, grows louder]

[Sophie]: what

[Mara]: in the distance

[Sophie]: in the distance, I hear it

[Mara]: it's getting closer

[Sophie]: it is it's getting louder, I think do we have a polyfolly

[Mara]: we have a pollyfolly

[Sophie]: son of a bitch we have a polyfolly fucking pollyfolly

[Mara]: [laughs]

[klaxon fades]

[Mara]: so today's pollyfolly is getting into too many realtionships too quickly which uhh this is like new relationship energy and polysaturation in one fun package

[Sophie]: yeah I umm I wanna mention that this also includes joining triads and things like that if you find a cool couple or if you find a cool triad or a cool polycule of any size that you think you wanna join that is cool I am happy for you but

[Mara]: check yourself

[Sophie]: it could get very bad very quick especially as the new realtionship energy wears off I would not be shocked at all to hear that someone in that situation would begin to feel polysaturated again doesn't make you bad doesn't make you wrong it just means that it's something you need to be aware of going into it that way you don't make an ass of yourself, get it, cool, also probably uh ya know you mentioned new relationship energy and I wanna throw this in there a lot of new relationship energy can convince you to get too serious too soon in a relationship that's definitely gotta be a big polyfolly

[Mara]: yeah well and if you haven't listend to that episode yet we have a whole episod-

[Sophie]: what are ya doing ya lis- doing in the wrong order

[Mara]: there's no order Sophie

[Sophie]: there is an order, no when I export these to m-p-three they ask me what the track number is and I put it in there

[Mara]: there's not an order, but yeah we have a whole episode that talks about why that's a difficult thing you should go listen to that that's why that's a polyfolly don't jump up that relationship escalator

[Sophie]: don't jump up a podcast escalator listen to it in the right order

[Mara]: all right, uhh also failing to get to know someone fully before getting comitted to them that is that is guilty

[Sophie]: yeah guilty

[Mara]: you can't see it , raising my hand guilty guilty as fuck

[Sophie]: can you tell, ya know these polyfollies we don't have like a magic book that we look into that somebody else wrote and we say ahh these where the polyfollies are if we're saying usually means we've done it and is usually means it went poorly

[Mara]: yeah so good to know people

[Sophie]: getting to know you [singing] getting to know things about you

[Mara]: a;lsdkfj not wrong, that's fine [laughs ] but yeah no get get to know your partners it's cool

[Sophie]: we're gonna have no downloads after this episodes because people aren't gonna want to listen to my voice

[Mara]: before you saddle that comittment monster [comittment monster growl]

[Sophie]: every fucking episode he's gonna be in now I swear

[Mara]: yeah he's a reocurring character well see it's the less than four times more than seven times theory so I'm sorry for the next few episodes you're gonna fuckin hate the comittment monster but

[Sophie]: oh but then it'll start to be ironically funny again

[Mara]: yeah

[Sophie]: yeah because we've doing it too much until we've done it sooo much that it just becomes funny again

[Mara]: mhmm

[Sophie]: got it okay

[Mara]: yeah

[Sophie]: now I understand

[Mara]: but before you saddle up that comittment monster get to know the person that you're saddling that comittment monster with because oh wow this is gonna get real real dark they might stab you in the back and ride off with that comittment monster

[Sophie]: they might steal your comittment monster and then you'll have to go find a new comittment monster

[Mara]: and I just nobody wants to do that

[Sophie]: breaking in a new comittment monster is a terrible line of work

[Mara]: [laughs] umm yeah so I think that's all we have for polyfollies today

[Sophie]: before we finish up I have a few points of order

[Mara]: is this a meeting

[Sophie]: this is well

[Mara]: I didn't know you're falling roberts rules

[Sophie]: roberts rules

[Mara]: roberts rules, meeting, no we don't have points of order

[Sophie]: uhh well we do have this point of order, umm I didn't pay much attention in my commuinications class that my college required me to take um I'm pretty sure I did actually go to college to get stupid but umm I just want to mention again like we mentioned at the begining we do have a twitter and a facebook but as you can also see on the cover art of this we have a patreon now which is really cool and uhh like I said the link should be in your cover art it won't work if you click on it but it's seriously patreon dot com slash polyam radio it's pretty easy and before you turn this off because we're asking you for money just hear me out for one second umm we have some really cool rewards that we're gonna be putting on patreon and it would really help us out seriously it starts at just one dollar a months

[Mara]: give us your lunch money

[Sophie]: yeah I'm gonna start out I'm gonna just read very quickly some of the cool rewards that we have on there you can go uhh ya know read them yourself on the link but I'm just gonna ya know briefly briefly umm kinda go through it so for the first level which is patrons this starts at just one dollar a month uhh seriously y'all that is fifty cents an episode that you're basically paying for this I think these ya know frankly I think these episodes are worth more than fifty cents a piece uhh but you're getting them for free right now and if you'd like to show your support but you're kinda straped for cash that's absolutely fine for just one dollar a month you'll get a personal shout out on this show probably on most of the episodes umm ya know that's a pretty cool thing ya know you can hear your own name and other people will know how cool you are and I think that's a really awesome thing uhh for partner that's partner of the show not partner of us, that's a five dollar a month tier and at this level you'll not only get a shout out on the show almost every episode but uhh you'll also get access to a few bonus episodes we're gonna record and post and those are gonna be cool topics that only our patreon users will have access to so that's some very cool stuff and ya know frankly I hope everybody ya know wants to support on patreon and I hope everyone is able to because these are gonna be really cool episodes that you're not gonna have access to otherwise and ya know it's not that we wanna keep things from other people we just wanna ya know those people that uhh wanna go the extra mile and support us that way we wanna do them a little something umm and then primaries this is the top teir right now for ten dollars uhh a month or more I wanted to make a glucose guardian slash sugar daddy level but all I could think of the reward was show you my tits and I don't think I'm allowed to do that especially over an audio only medium umm so basically at the ten dollar a month level uhh you'll get the shout out on the show you'll get the bonus episodes and uhh you will get all the episodes a week before they come out for everybody else so basically once we get some ten dollar basically what we're gonna be doing is over winter break I'm gonna create kind of a backlog of these episodes and we're gonna have a few of them stored up and I'll be posting them a week early on patreon for our ten dollar a month primary umm uhh patrons I guess our primary patrons umm so if you really really love this show and you wanna support it and you wanna get some early episodes and everything and see it before everyone else does and be the cool one at the bar who ya know knows what's going on in everybodies favorite podcast then that's a real good option I encourage you umm I made the descriptions of these levels very funny in the text I didn't wanna read them here because I wanted the surprise to be there for you but I encourage you at least visit our patreon give em a read umm maybe consider it and certainly share the link and tell your friends because umm we're looking at investing in some new recording equipment and stuff like that our microphone is really high quality but it's just sitting on the counter right now we don't have a mic stand umm we don't have a kind of a one of those cloth like pop ya know buffer things umm uh I'm sorry I've been really sick all week and yeah like I said sorry I'm getting sick and or I'm just getting over being sick rather and its reall- this is really taking a toll on my voice today umm but anyways umm ya know I know that umm uhh it would mean the world to both Mara and me if you would at least consider supporting and if you'd share with your friends so we can get more listeners right now this is only the fourth episode we're recording and right now we've got about twenty or so people who listen a week and I can't tell you how amazing that feels I know that's not much in the podcasting world when people have ya know six figures of followers but I'm an activist who does events at the colligiate level right now and when I put on a program if twenty people showed up uhh ya know I'm in heaven ya know that's great in my world truly umm ya know we love and appriciate every single one of your you're the absolute ya know I guess you're our fans I guess and like ya know not that you like bake us cookies and send us things and whatever but I still think you're the best fans in the world and I just I can't tell you how much we both appriciate this so like I said please consider supporting us and please this week if you could it would mean a lot to us tell at least at least one friend or partner about this podcast and just download it on their phone for them just give them that just say hey I'm just gonna do this quick and then ya have it and listen to it whenever you gotta because then they got it and they won't forget the name of it it would really help us out and it'll help us uhh ya know it would help our confidence and whatnot it would help us knowing that we're getting a wider reach and it'll help more people find this and hopefully it'll help more people learn more about polyamory because that's what this whole thing is about so yeah that's enough for the formal meeting portion of this and I think that's actually about all the time we have today so uhh have a nice holiday and remember don't date you're dad's best friend

[Sophie]: [Mara]: and don't date you're best friends dad

[Sophie]: see you next time folks

["Good old fashioned lover boy" by Queen plays]

[Announcer]: This show was part of the trans podcaster visibility initiative

[End transcript]

#polysaturation #polyamradio #polyam #polyamory #queer #trans #transcript #ep4

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Text

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davidoespailla · 6 years ago

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‘Thousands of People Will Lose Their Property’—Homeowners Battle Over the Border Wall

Getty Images; Mauricio Vidaurri; realtor.com

Texan Mauricio Vidaurri fears he will soon lose his father—again.

The elder Vidaurri, a World War II veteran, is buried in a 200-year-old cemetery on his 1,300-acre La Laja Ranch, which was passed down to Mauricio and his seven siblings. The Zapata County property has been in their family since the late 18th century. It was issued through a Spanish land grant before the United States of America declared its independence.

But now the younger Vidaurri worries that a portion of the property, which lies along what is now the U.S.-Mexico border, will be seized by the federal government to make way for the wall championed by President Donald Trump. And he will be forced to surrender the graves of generations of his forebears.

Texas is about to become the front line of the real battle for Trump’s border wall—one that could pit the U.S. government against an estimated 5,000 landowners who have no intention of giving up their family legacies or hard-earned homes. It’s a conflict that could drag on for years and cost taxpayers far more than the nearly $1.4 billion congressional leaders have allotted for fencing along the border in their latest proposal. (Trump has estimated the price tag for a full wall could be as little as $15 billion, but his adversaries have pegged it at as much as $70 billion.)

Trump hasn’t signaled whether he’ll sign the latest bill, which funds only 55 miles of fencing along the border in the valley. He had wanted 215 miles.

Currently, only about a third of the 2,000-mile U.S.-Mexico boundary is fenced or walled, or has barriers in place. It’s typically in the most populated areas in California, Arizona, and New Mexico. Much of that land is government-owned, so there was no need to invoke eminent domain to seize it.

The barrier along the U.S.-Mexico border

Tony Frenzel

But in Texas, where most of the border property is privately owned, the Rio Grande has served as a natural border and deterrent. The last big round of border fencing, part of President George W. Bush‘s Secure Fence Act of 2006, triggered hundreds of lawsuits in Texas, dozens of which are still in the courts.

“If this goes forward, this will be one of the largest exercises in eminent domain in the modern history of the federal government,” says Ilya Somin, a law professor at George Mason University and an adjunct scholar at the Cato Institute, a think tank. “Realistically, hundreds, even thousands of people will lose their property. There will be legal battles over the legal compensation.”

The court challenges are likely to multiply even further if the president bypasses Congress and declares a national emergency to get the wall built. A particularly contentious battlefield could be the 62 miles of a Native American reservation along the Arizona border. It’s not clear if the president could seize that property without congressional approval. And it’s unlikely that a Democrat-controlled House of Representatives would approve the emergency taking of that land.

Of course, not all lawmakers believe the wall is necessary. The only Republican member of Congress along the border, Rep. Will Hurd, called the proposed barriers a “third-century solution to a 21st-century problem.” All nine members of Congress serving the districts along the border oppose its construction.

Mauricio Vidaurri fears the federal government will seize his family land along the U.S.-Mexico border.

Photo provided by Mauricio Vidaurri

Residents such as Vidaurri aren’t interested in political squabbling. For them, the barrier is personal.

“We’ll lose our history that goes back almost 300 years. … That’s painful,” says Vidaurri, 60. He lives in Laredo, TX, about 22 miles from the family land. But he visits his 140 acres of the ranch at least twice a week to check on the graves of four generations of his family. The land is currently used for hay production, hunting, and natural gas drilling.

This doesn’t mean that Vidaurri and his family would lose all of their property on the Mexican side of the wall. They would cede the land under and around the wall—which in Vidaurri’s case would likely include the family cemetery. Under the Secure Fence Act, gates were erected that landowners whose property straddled the border could open with a code. But many property owners don’t feel safe having such gates.

“You’re putting a big ol’ bull’s-eye on my back,” Vidaurri says. “Guess who wants that code? The cartel, the drug smugglers, and the human smugglers.”

Legal challenges could drag on for decades and jack up costs

Landowners aren’t likely to win a David-and-Goliath-style battle with the federal government. But they may be able to successfully challenge the amount of real estate they ultimately cede, says Jim Burling, an eminent domain attorney at the Pacific Legal Foundation in Sacramento.

They can also push back against very low offers—in effect, driving up the price tag for the wall.

“Local, state, and federal agencies are notorious for trying to pay as little as possible for properties they take,” says Burling.

About a decade ago, the government took less than 10 acres of Tudor Uhlhorn‘s property along the border to put up fencing. But it lowballed him, so he went to an attorney and received a larger settlement.

That’s typical. Of the 334 eminent domain lawsuits filed in the southern part of Texas during the George W. Bush years, about 70 cases are still in court, according to the Washington Post. Most of those lawsuits revolve around money. And property owners with attorneys received about triple what they were initially offered, according to ProPublica and Texas Tribune.

“Everybody needs to have an attorney that knows what he’s doing,” says Uhlhorn, the commissioner of the city of Harlingen, TX.

The Tohono O’odham Nation, which has 62 miles along the border on their Native American reservation in Southern Arizona, already has its attorneys in place.

“The land on the U.S.-Mexico border is precious, sacred land. This land is not for sale,” says Verlon Jose, vice chairman of the Tohono O’odham Nation.

The tribe has about 34,000 members, although only 9,000 to 10,000 of them live on the reservation. The pain of losing the property, Jose says, would be akin to “taking a knife and cutting it across your heart.”

But even as the question of funding remains unresolved, the government is gearing up to take private property from scores of homeowners.

The federal government is planning to survey Nayda Alvarez’s land, a preliminary step before seizing it.

Krystal Anne Gonzalez

High school speech teacher Nayda Alvarez, 47, received a letter from U.S. Customs and Border Protection in January stating the agency will be filing an action in federal court that will allow it to access her property on the outskirts of Rio Grande City, TX, for 12 months to conduct “necessary” surveys. It’s one of the first steps toward an eminent domain seizure.

“Border security tactical infrastructure, such as border walls, lighting, and roads, are critical elements to gain effective control of our Nation’s borders,” reads the letter dated Jan. 9. “The purpose of border security infrastructure is to deter illicit cross-border activity such as drug smuggling, border violence and illegal immigration.”

The agency did not respond to a request for comment.

These are very real issues along the boundary of the two countries. About a year ago, drug smugglers abandoned a car on Alvarez’s property as they were pursued by border control. (They didn’t cross into the U.S. through her property.) The vehicle was removed before she came home from work.

But Alvarez still feels safe in her four-bedroom, two-bathroom home, where she had planned to retire. She scrimped and saved to build it 12 years ago, and now is afraid the government will take it away.

“I’m very upset. I’ve worked my [butt off] to pay for it,” says Alvarez, who shares the home with her 22-year-old daughter. “And now I’m going to start at zero.”

Last year, the Army Corps of Engineers attempted to lease part of her grandfather’s property, next door, for four years for a grand total of $750. She refused.

“I’m a born U.S. citizen, and I don’t feel like it’s right for someone to take away what is mine,” says Alvarez.

Will a wall save—or sink—struggling border towns?

With the exception of San Diego, about 30 miles north of Mexico, border towns tend to be sparsely populated and lack good jobs.

The border cities of McAllen and Brownsville in Texas, about an hour apart, are two of the poorest cities in the nation. Both already have some fencing along the U.S.-Mexico line.

In the 80 U.S-Mexico border ZIP codes, median home prices are about a third lower than the rest of the nation, at just $195,282 as of December 2018, according to a realtor.com® analysis. And annually, homes aren’t appreciating nearly as much as those in the rest of the country—2.3% compared with 7.1% nationally.

“In Texas alone, you’ve got cities on the border where you have high levels of unemployment and poverty—and real estate values reflect that,” says Terence Garrett, a public affairs and security studies professor at the University of Texas Rio Grande Valley in Brownsville. “[We’re] so far away from the state capitals and Washington, DC, [we] become an afterthought, an area that is not well-understood.”

But the wall could also have benefits for some in these struggling communities and real estate markets. It would make some folks feel safer as they wouldn’t have to deal with the repercussions of immigrants crossing through their properties illegally. (Opponents say immigrants without documents will still find ways to enter the United States.)

“Once those problems are pushed out of those areas, it raises the property values,” says Tom Fullerton, an economics professor at the University of Texas at El Paso, who specializes in border economies.

“It’s going to be viewed as a safety [protection],” adds Sue Ann Taubert, a Texas real estate broker and president of the Harlingen Board of Realtors.

While a wall may not be a scenic sight, it’s not likely to affect too many folks on a day-to-day basis. The areas where it would be built tend to be fairly rural.

And in the short term, construction of the wall could create an employment boom for nearby towns and cities. Although most new workers would likely be temporary, they would still be spending money locally, including on housing.

Intertwined economies are difficult to unwind

But the economic picture is complicated on the border. Communities often have large sister cities on the Mexican side, and locals go back and forth between them frequently. Those economies tend to be closely intertwined.

Mexican customers “are extremely important to support businesses on the American side,” says Garrett. “This is the fear about amping [up] border security: It drives customers away.”

It could also affect U.S. businesses that have workers, plants, and warehouses in Mexico as well as the Rio Grande Valley’s emerging eco-tourism sector. A wall would cut through the National Butterfly Center in Mission, TX, and the 2,088-acre Santa Ana National Wildlife Refuge in Alamo, TX. Congress previously spared the refuge, a popular destination for bird-watching, from division by a barrier.

The National Butterfly Center is expected to be plowed over to clear the way for President Donald Trump’s border wall after the U.S. Supreme Court rebuffed a challenge by environmental groups.

SUZANNE CORDEIRO/AFP/Getty Images

Already talk of the wall, and the weaker peso, has deterred Mexican nationals buying homes in the Rio Grande Valley, says McAllen, TX–based real estate broker Rene Galvan, of RGV Realty. Many are selling the vacation homes they already own on the American side—for a loss.

“All of these things are mounting up,” Galvan says. “It’s like pulling the welcome mat off the front door.”

The post ‘Thousands of People Will Lose Their Property’—Homeowners Battle Over the Border Wall appeared first on Real Estate News & Insights | realtor.com®.

‘Thousands of People Will Lose Their Property’—Homeowners Battle Over the Border Wall

#TRUSTED LOCAL REALTOR #‘Thousands of People Will Lose Their Property’—Homeowners Battle Over the Bor

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meghancheyenne · 7 years ago

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What is a Fraudulent Transfer in Bankruptcy?

A fraudulent transfer can basically be defined as transferring property out of your name to delay or defraud a creditor. If you “sell” a home worth $1 million to your Uncle Joe for just $1 dollar because a creditor is breathing down your neck, you’ve likely triggered state and federal fraudulent conveyance statutes. In Utah, the statute is 6 years from the date of transfer according to a Bankruptcy attorney.

What is constructive fraud?

There are two types of fraudulent transfers. Actual fraud involves transferring property with the actual intent to defraud creditors. Constructive fraud involves a transfer that is made for grossly inadequate consideration, such as the “sale” to Uncle Joe in the example above, which supplies a presumption of fraud even absent direct proof.

The structure of constructive fraud in bankruptcy includes two parts:

a lack of “reasonably equivalent value” and

a sign of financial distress

Signs of financial distress are being insolvent or rendered insolvent, unreasonably small capital, and incurring debts beyond the ability to pay as they mature.

In Bankruptcy, the Trustee Can Sue to Unwind the Transfer

Once a property transfer is deemed fraudulent, either because there is proof of fraud or the sale price is too low, the trustee may attempt to recover the property, or the value of the property, and make it part of the bankruptcy estate. This is done through filing a lawsuit.

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In our example with Uncle Joe, if you transferred your house to Joe for $1 and then filed bankruptcy, the trustee would serve Joe with a complaint seeking to recover the value of the home. If the conveyance is then found to be fraudulent, you’ll lose your right to claim an exemption for the property.

The trustee may recover the property from either the immediate recipient (Joe) or from anyone else to whom the property was subsequently transferred (perhaps a cousin). An exception is the bona fide purchaser rule. A bona fide purchaser is one who acted in good faith to purchase the property without notice of the outstanding rights of others to the property. The bona fide purchaser has the right to retain the property.

The Look Back Period for a Fraudulent Transfer

How long can a trustee look back in time to find a fraudulent conveyance?

Under the Bankruptcy Code, the look back period is two years; however, the trustee may use state law if the allowed look back period is longer. Many states, including Florida and Massachusetts, have adopted the Uniform Fraudulent Transfer Act (UFTA), which allows creditors to look back four years to find a fraudulent conveyance. Some states implement an older version of UFTA called the Uniform Fraudulent Conveyances Act (UFCA).

In any case, if your state is a UFTA state, the trustee will then have a four-year period to try to unwind transfers that appear fraudulent. Note that some states will have longer look back periods. In New York, Minnesota, Michigan, and Maine, the look back period is six years. In Kentucky and Iowa, it’s five years.

The Bottom Line: Seek the Help of a Bankruptcy Attorney

Conveyance laws inside and outside of bankruptcy can be complicated. Seek the help of an experienced bankruptcy attorney before transferring property. If you’ve already transferred property that may be construed as constructive fraud, a bankruptcy lawyer can help you avoid negative consequences — namely, your bankruptcy being denied a discharge — by recovering the asset before you file for bankruptcy.

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And remember, fraud — whether it is intentional or not — is not the only way to screw up your bankruptcy discharge. Destroying records, lying under oath, hiding property, and/or not being able to explain why certain property is missing from your bankruptcy estate are other big reasons a bankruptcy can fail. Be smart and be honest with the bankruptcy court. The last thing you want to do is waste your precious time and money filing a bankruptcy case that will be denied — and you certainly don’t want to go to jail for bankruptcy fraud.

Free Consultation with Bankruptcy Lawyer

If you have a bankruptcy question, or need to file a bankruptcy case, call Ascent Law now at (801) 676-5506. Attorneys in our office have filed over a thousand cases. We can help you now. Come in or call in for your free initial consultation.

Ascent Law LLC8833 S. Redwood Road, Suite CWest Jordan, Utah 84088 United StatesTelephone: (801) 676-5506

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