#one thing about me is that i will give every man a tattoo idc idc

[katasstrophy]

you know how shidou’s always drawn with these inky demon wings whenever he enters his flow state or does something absolutely monster level genius on the field?

yeah these <3

what if. what if he got those wings tattooed on his back. intense black tendrils stretching along his entire broad frame and hugging the curve of his prominent shoulder blades, jagged dark lines continuing south along the expanse of hard muscle framing his spine, the pointy edge of the devilish wings ending low, low on his back, almost teasingly dipping past the waistband of his shorts worn even lower. i’m actually being so normal about this thanks for asking

[unreadpoppy]

Festis bei umo canavarum (part 1)

Fenris x F!Hawke

Read on AO3

Summary: Hawke and Fenris' relationship, from the moment they met, to them irritating one another, to feelings growing and more.

A/N: This is too long and it's only the first part but I got stuck and decided to post it anyways. Basically, there's many scenes from the game but with some added stuff. These two have been consuming my brain and I needed to write it down to distract myself from real life. Also, there's some sexual harrasment in this chapter, so be warned. Maybe it's a bit OOC but idc.

Word count: 7,774

When Meeran had contacted Hawke about a job, she did not think it would lead her to meeting a handsome elf, but she wasn’t complaining. 

Before being attacked by yet another bounty hunter, a white haired man, covered in white tattoos, killed them in a rather unusual way - his hand phasing through their chests while he said “I am not a slave.” 

He introduced himself as Fenris. He explained that those hunters had been sent after him by his old master, a Tevinter magister named Danarius. He needed protection and asked Hawke and her companions to help him end Danarius’s life. 

They failed, as the magister had already fled his mansion, leaving only shades and rage demons behind. Fenris went outside, to catch some air, and when Hawke and the others appeared, he was leaning against a wall. 

“I escaped a land of dark magic only to have it hunt me at every turn. It is a plague burned into my flesh and my soul. ” He said, turning to look at Hawke. “And now I find myself in the presence of yet another mage.” 

She raised a brow. It seemed that he was yet one more person that did not like mages. Though, considering his story, she wasn’t surprised. 

“Oh? Am I?” She asked, although she knew the answer, Hawke hoped she could try to play dumb as to not reveal her identity, just as she did with the templars from time to time. 

He did not buy it. “I saw you casting spells inside. I should have realized sooner what you really were.” 

She did not like the tone he used. “When you speak like that, you make it seem like I’m sort of a terrible, hidden abomination.” 

Fenris squinted his eyes and said “You are a mage.” As if the two things were one and the same. He then shook his head and asked “What manner a mage are you? What is it that you seek?”

Hawke crossed her arms. “Do you have a problem with mages?” 

“I have an issue with magic and those who are careless with it.” 

It was then that Carver said “If you have a problem with my sister, you have a problem with me.” 

“I imagine I appear ungrateful. If so, I apologize, for nothing could be further from the truth. Idid not find Danarius, but I owe you a debt.” He proceeded to give Hawke all the coin he had. “Should you find yourself in need of assistance, I should gladly render it.” 

Once again, she raised a brow, suspicious. “I’m surprised. You did not seem all that thrilled with me a moment ago.” 

Fenris sighed. “You are not Danarius. Whether you are anything like him remains to be seen.” 

After that, he proceeded to explain what led him to Kirkwall. His previous master had experimented on him, injecting lyrium into his skin, the reason as to how he had killed that man earlier, and why now Danarius was after him. 

“He wishes his precious investment back, even if he must rip it from my corpse.” 

It was then that Hawke found the perfect opportunity to tease the elf. “Seems like a waste of a perfectly handsome elf.” 

Fenris chuckled nervously, clearing his throat and changing the subject. He spoke a bit more of Danarius, his markings and Tevinter, telling Hawke that he would reclaim the mansion as his own and should she need him, he’d be there. 

With that, they said their goodbyes and left, Hawke saying she would talk to him later. 

“Interesting fellow.” Hawke said to Varric and Carver, once they were heading back to the Hanged Man. 

“An escaped ex-slave who hates mages.” Varric said. “This sure will be fun.” 

. 

True to her word, Hawke met with Fenris at his mansion the following night. 

“Aggregio Pavalli. There are six bottles in the cellar.” He said, holding a wine bottle in his hand. “Danarius used to have me pour it for his guests. My appearance intimidated them.” 

Hawke smirked. “I can’t imagine why they would be put off.” 

“You say what’s on your mind, I’ll give you that.” 

“I’m a very opinionated woman. Might as well share it with the world.” 

Fenris huffed, taking a swing from the bottle before throwing it at the wall. “Good to know I can still take pleasure in the small things.” 

Hawke raised a brow and looked at him. She worried for a second, questions raising in her mind about his behavior, and in part she wanted to comfort him. 

Instead, however, Hawke decided to go with her usual sassiness. “You could at least offer me a glass first, you know.” 

“There’s more, if you’re really interested.” 

She waved a hand. “Perish the thought. How else would you redecorate the walls?” She leaned back in her chair, getting more comfortable. 

Fenris laughed and then eyed her for a moment before sitting down. “You never answered my question.” She raised a brow and he clarified. “About what you are seeking.” 

Hawke sighed. “Not more than what everyone else seeks. A good life for me and my family.”

He squinted his eyes. “A noble purpose. But I’ve seen many crimes committed in the name of that.” 

“That’s rich coming from the man who carved his path to freedom in blood. By his own admission.” 

Fenris clenched his jaw. “You saw that as if we were anything alike.” 

“Are we not?”

“No.” He said harshly. “We are nothing alike. You mages will always hold more power than those of us who don’t use magic.” 

She frowned. “If we were so powerful, we would have already ended the chantry and the templars.” 

“It’s practically what they have done in Tevinter.”

“Good thing we are not in Tevinter then.” Hawke said. 

“No, we are not.”  

The conversation was growing tiring for the both of them. Before it became worse, Fenris decided to change the subject. He turned to look at the flames. “I’ve wanted to leave my past behind. But it won’t stay there.” Then he looked at Hawke again. “Tell me, have you never wanted to return to Ferelden?” 

‘When he asks that after that little argument, it’s almost as if he wants me to leave’ Hawke thought. Instead, she said “I’ve no home to return to.” 

“The Blight is over. You could rebuild what you lost. Do you truly not want to?” 

She looked at him, studying his face, and something told her this question meant more to him than just mere curiosity. What it was, however, she could not tell. 

Hawke sighed. “I must admit, I have thought about it. But if we were to return, we would face the same challenges we did when we arrived in Kirkwall a year ago. Better to stay here and tend what we have, then to start over again.” 

“So you just moved on?” 

“I had to.” She said. “My home was destroyed, my father and sister were dead, and while I’ll always carry them and Ferelden in my heart, I can’t cling on to the past forever if I mean to live my life.” Hawke looked at him. “Change is good.” 

His lips formed a line. “I see.” He turned his face away, a frown appearing on his face and she wondered about what he was thinking. 

“Do you intend on staying here?” Hawke asked. 

“I haven’t decided.” He shrugged. “For now, it’s as good as any other place. I would return to Seheron if I could but…there is no life for me there.” 

“You’re from Seheron?”

“It’s what I’ve been told.” 

She frowned. “You were very young when you left, then?”

“Perhaps.” 

Hawke blinked and decided to drop that line of questioning. “Speaking of plans for the future…You could track your former master down, I assume. Strike him when he least expects it.” 

“I imagine he has returned to Minrathous, though I would not dare go near the city while he still lives.” He paused for a moment. “No, it is better to wait for him to leave his fortress. Fight from a fortified position.” Fenris looked at Hawke. “I do not expect your help when that day comes, but I would not turn it aside.” 

“What, you think because I’m a mage I wouldn’t help you?” She said, smirking. Before he could reply, she added “I’m teasing you, don’t worry. But tell me, how long have you been running from Danarius?”

“Three years, now. He has a way of finding me - perhaps it is the markings?” He questioned to himself. “Whatever the means, it never takes him long for him to follow. This is the first time I’ve given him reason to pause. I suppose there’s an advantage in numbers.”

“Oh? So you’ve been alone this whole time, then?”

“Sort of. I had hirelings from time to time, when I had the coin. Never anyone of substance - until you.” He shook his head. “Danarius will not give up, however. I await his return.” 

“And what if he gives up? What then.”

“Then I go to him. I will not live with a wolf at my back.” 

“You won’t let sleeping dogs lie?” 

“No. I am no fool.” 

“I understand.” She said. Although they had only just met, Hawke noticed that Fenris seemed the type to never let go of the past. If that would be good or bad was yet to be seen. “Although, if you want to begin a new life, you could stay here.” 

“I could see myself staying. For the right reasons.” He said, looking at her.

She raised a brow, a half smirk on her face. “Maybe it’s just me, but it sounds like you want to stick around.” 

He smiled briefly and then shook his head. “I should thank you again for helping with the hunters. Had I known Anso would find me a woman so capable, I’d ask sooner.”

Hawke smiled. “It sounds like you’re about to ask for a loan.” 

“Well, this mansion does require some upkeep.” He then stood up. “Perhaps I’ll practice my flattery for your next visit? With any luck I’ll become better at it.” 

“Hopefully.” Hawke stood up, making her way towards the door. “It was quite a nice visit. I shall see you soon. Good night, Fenris.” She said as she left, and he only nodded

.

The week after they had met, Fenris followed Hawke and Varric to the Gallows for the first time. He had heard the stories about the place, of its past and present, and that now it was where the Circle of Magi resided. 

Fenris had never been in a Circle before, though he had heard of them in Tevinter. He always wondered what they were like, if they truly could contain the mages and stop them from their wickedness. 

At first, he had been somewhat excited about the idea. A place where mages couldn’t hurt anyone. But this one felt more like a prison, and for a moment, Fenris did not know if that was better or worse. 

And although he usually did not mind the presence of templars, there were too many here and for a moment, he worried about Hawke’s presence there. 

“Are you certain it is wise for you to be here?” He asked her. 

She turned around and raised a brow at this question, but then smirked. “Oh, I’m sure nobody will notice little old me.” 

“Very reassuring.” 

“What? You mean to say that Hawke’s not your everyday, regular, citizen?” Varric chimed in sarcastically. 

“Exactly. There’s nothing special about me for them to question.” Hawked then leaned. “Besides, these templars are so stupid, they could not tell someone was a mage even if they saw them practicing magic.” 

Fenris scoffed. “If the templars are truly that bad at their jobs, why are you and Anders and Merrill so careful all the time?” He took a step forward as Hawke clenched her jaw. “I mean, by your own words, you should be able to easily parade magic around here and no one would notice.” He crossed his arms. “But the templars are good at what they do. Maybe a little too good, or else Anders wouldn’t complain about his little apostate friends being recaptured all the time.” 

Hawke’s nostrils flared. “You are infuriating.” 

He raised a brow. “Now you know how I feel.” 

Before she could reply, Varric stepped in between the two. “Sorry to interrupt your lovely argument, but people are starting to look.” He said, pointing to the others around them. 

Hawke took a deep breath and stepped behind. “Don’t worry, Varric, I’m sure Fenris and I can act like responsible adults.” She gave him a tight, fake smile. 

“I know I can.” He said. “I’m not so sure if you mages can.” 

.

Fenris did not understand Hawke’s interest in him. He never thought the woman to be so curious but after walking out of the Qunari compound, she began questioning. 

“I didn’t know you knew the Qun.” She said. “Or that you spoke Qunlat.”

He huffed “There is much you don’t know about me.” 

“And what if I wanted to know?” 

“I would say you’re a bigger fool than I thought.” 

“Why? Because I want to know more about you?”

“Precisely.” Fenris walked ahead, trying to end the conversation. 

But apparently, Hawke wasn’t done yet, as she soon catched up to him. 

“You’re an interesting guy. What’s the harm in wanting to know more?” 

“I’m not interesting.” He said, looking ahead and trying to ignore her. 

“Oh, but you are.” She smirked. “I’m sure underneath that facade you put-”

Fenris stopped and turned to Hawke, irritated “I don’t know what you’re trying to get at, but I suggest you stop.” 

“Or what?” 

Fenris frowned, confused. 

“If I don’t stop, what are you going to do?” She said. 

“I-” Fenris hesitated, not knowing what to say, when Hawke began to laugh. 

“You should see your face when you get mad.” She sighed. “Don’t worry, I just like pulling on your leg. I’ll leave you to your brooding.” 

“I don’t-” Fenris began to say but Hawke had walked away, Varric showing up besides him.

“Yes, you do, Broody. Yes you do.” The dwarf said chuckling, and followed behind Hawke, leaving the elf to shake his head and wonder what exactly had he gotten himself into. 

.

Fenris was an enigma that deeply confounded Hawke. 

By all accounts, she should hate him. At every possible turn, Fenris would voice his distaste for mages. He’d speak on how they could not be trusted, give them too much power, freedom and you’ll have another Tevinter. The circle, the templars and the chantry’s actions were all justified in his eyes - after all, to him, mages were not strong enough to not give in to the temptation of demons and blood magic. 

Hawke did not blame him for having that opinion, not after all he had endured. She believed anyone in his shoes would think the same. Maker, even she would hate mages if she had been stripped of her memory, her personhood and been experimented on, fated to carry those marks forever. 

So no, Hawke did not blame Fenris for hating mages. 

But it still hurt whenever he spoke so ill of them - in a way, he was speaking of her. 

In Lothering, Hawke never thought much about her fellow mages or their plight. Of course she knew how bad things could be in the Circle, her father having escaped one, but besides herself and her family, she didn’t think of others. 

Perhaps it had been selfish of her to not care about those beyond her family but it was not like there was much she could do. She didn’t know other mages besides her father and Bethany, why should she care about them?

It was only after Kirkwall that she began caring. 

Although she was accustomed to hiding her identity in Lothering, the dynamic in Kirkwall was more oppressive. Knight-Commander Meredith seemed intent on squashing every mage under her thumb, the number of Tranquils rising everyday. 

At first, she thought Anders was a little too radical in his views about the Circle and the Chantry. But then they met Karl and reality came crashing down on her. 

She didn’t know how to explain what she felt. The idea of having her emotions, her personality stripped from her because she commited the sin of being born was too much to bear. Surely, there must be some other way, she thought, some other way to ensure mages wouldn’t turn to demons without doing…this. 

“All color, all music in the world, gone.” Karl had said. 

Hawke’s heart beat loudly in her ears, she felt like vomiting and she wanted to cry. She wanted to not be born a mage, to live in peaceful oblivion where she did not have to think of this, did not have to hear every templar she met say how dangerous her people were. 

For days, that had been the only thing on her mind and maybe that was why she snapped at Fenris that night. 

She did not remember what he had even said. It was probably another one of this comments on how all mages were terrible. Usually, she’d ignore them, but that night, she didn’t.

“Did you know” Hawke said, turning back to face him ”that mages do not choose to be born with magic?” 

He frowned, getting by surprise with the question. “Yes, I do know. Why do you ask?”

“Well, because it certainly doesn’t look like it when you say those things about mages.”

“Am I supposed to turn a blind eye to all that mages have done simply because they were born that way?” He said angrily. 

“That is not what I said.” Hawke tried to argue but he didn’t listen as he continued his rant. 

“Is what Danarius and every other Tevinter magister done justified because they didn’t have a choice? You mages are all alike” he scoffed “You think your perceived oppression allows you to do whatever.”

“Perceived? Have you not seen how the templars treat us?” 

“That’s because you give them all the reason to! If anything, the templars are not enough. Look at all the blood mages running around in this city.” 

“They only do so because they have nothing else to turn to!” She shouted. “They take us from our homes, they give us no freedom and if we step just one hair out of line, we get ripped of our very essence. What else is there to do? There’s so many blood mages because of the templars and the chantry’s actions.” 

“So you think blood magic is good?”

“No!” She groaned, frustrated. “I don’t agree with blood magic but I can understand why so many turn to it.” 

Fenris shook his head. “Then you are just as bad as them.” 

Hawke closed her eyes, taking a deep breath before looking at him defiantly. “Then why don’t you go tell the Knight-Commander about me?” 

“What?” 

She took a step forward. “If you think all mages should be locked up, then by all means, go tell the next templar you see about me, Anders and Merrill. We are apostates, after all.” 

“Hawke.” He said in a low tone, almost as a warning. She continued to move towards him. 

“No, because if you truly, truly think all mages are this awful and cannot be trusted, you’d already found the nearest templar and pointed them towards our houses.” She stopped at an arm’s length from him. “So tell me, Fenris, why do you keep us around if you hate all mages?”

It was his turn to take a deep breath. “I don’t…hate all mages.”

It was Hawke’s turn to be surprised. She frowned, waiting for him to continue. 

“I am not blind. I know magic has its uses, and there are undoubtedly mages with good intentions. But even the best-intentioned mage can fall prey to temptation and their power is a curse to inflict upon others.”

“Do you think that of me?”

He looked at her. “You’re strong, Hawke.” He stepped closer to her. “Strong, capable… “ He stopped himself from saying something else, clearing his throat and then continuing. “You might be the only mage I trust to not listen to demons or turn to blood magic. Not all mages are like you, however.” After he said that, Fenris stepped back, walking away and leaving here alone. 

Those sentences kept echoing in Hawke’s mind as she made her way back to Gamlen’s house. It hadn’t been the first time he had said that - after invading Danarius’ mansion, Fenris told her something similar. 

“Had I known Anso would send a woman so capable, I might have asked him to look sooner.”

She remembered that first night when they met. She flirted with him then, finding it amusing how flustered he got when she called him handsome, his nervous chuckle endearing to her. 

“Perhaps I’ll practice my flattery for the next visit? With any luck I’ll become better at it.” 

Hawke shook her head. If what happened between the two of them that night served as indication, he had only gotten worse at it. 

By all means, she should be angry at him, and part of her was. But the other part couldn’t help but latch on to one single thought: Fenris doesn’t hate me. 

Fenris confounded her profusely because at the same time he hated mages, that he disagreed with her, he’d still trust Hawke. 

And for some reason, that made Hawke feel something like warmth. 

. 

It was the middle of the night when Fenris was awoken by a knock on his door. He tried to ignore it but whoever it was, they wouldn’t go away until he opened the door. 

“Varric.” He said, once he saw who was bothering him. 

“Finally. For a second, I thought I was going to have to lockpick your door.” 

“It’s late. What are you doing here?” 

“It’s about Hawke.” 

Fenris straightened his back. “Did something happen to her?”

“Yes. No. It’s complicated.” Varric scratched the back of his head. “Remember how we just got the first payment for all that treasure in the Deep Roads?” Fenris nodded. “Hawke was in a bit of a low mood because of her brother and I convinced her to go drink in the Hanged Man and one thing led to another, and well, I guess you have to see it for yourself.” Varric explained. “Look, I just need someone to drag Hawke back to her home, since I tried and failed.”

“And why call me? Wouldn’t Aveline be better for this? They’re friends and all.”

He shook his head. “Aveline’s gonna give her a scolding, and the others…you how they’re like. Rivianit would encourage her more, Daisy would end up joining in, and Blondie will talk about mages again. It has to be you.” 

Fenris huffed. “Fine. But you’ll be owning me a favour.” 

“Yeah, yeah, whatever you wish, elf.” 

The two made their way to the Hanged Man, and from the outside, music could be heard. 

“A group of traveling bards arrived a few hours ago.” Varric explained, before opening the door. 

The moment Fenris stepped in, he understood why the dwarf was so worried. 

There was Hawke, hopping from table to table, sitting in strange men’s lap and kissing them before standing up, throwing her arms in the air and dancing. Amusing as that was, it wouldn’t be much of a problem if it wasn’t for the fact that, that night, the Hanged Man was filled with templar recruits, many of whom eyed Hawke hungrily. 

For a moment, Fenris just watched as she threw her head around, her brown hair splashing on her face, as she danced with her eyes closed without a care in the world. He had never seen her so…free. So relaxed, even if it was alcohol induced. 

And he only smirked when, for a brief second, her green eyes met his, a blush spread across her round cheeks. 

But the moment was short lived as a templar roughly grabbed her waist, his hands roaming her body, as he whispered something in her ear. Whatever it was that he had said, it was followed by Hawke elbowing him in the stomach. 

“Get…off of me.” She said, speech a bit blurred. 

“Feisty.” The man grabbed her wrist, bringing her close as he tried to kiss her. “I like it when they put up a fight.” 

She struggled against him. “I said get off!” At the sudden shouting, the musicians stopped, and for a moment, all the in the tavern seemed to stop and look at the commotion, all on edge due to the templar presence. 

In an instant, Fenris separated the two, putting himself in front of Hawke.  “You heard her.” 

“And who do you think you are?” The man put his hands on his chest and pushed Fenris. “I’m a fucking templar!” 

Fenris growled, his lyrium markings beginning to glow blue. But before he could even think about striking the templar, Hawke decided to chime in. 

“You…templars think you can…” she hiccuped “do what you…want. That you-you rule this city.” 

“Hawke.” Fenris said, in that same warning tone he used before, turning his head to look at her. 

“Don’t…don’t ‘Hawke’ me.” She said to Fenris and then turned to look at the templar. “You templar don’t scare me.” She took a swing from the cup in her hand, one that Varric immediately pried away from her. “If any- if anything, you should be scared of me.” 

The templar’s expression went from angry to amused as he chuckled “That’s cute, but I don’t see why I should be scared of a drunk girl.”

Hawke stepped forward “You don’t-you don’t know what I’m capable of.” She said and from the corner of his eye, Fenris saw a spark of electricity run in between her fingers. 

“Hawke” He whispered this time, his fingers lightly touching her wrist. She looked down, only now noticing that she was almost casting a spell. 

The man didn’t seem to notice as he said “Don’t I? You couldn’t even fight me off by yourself. So, unless you’re one of those dirty mages…” he stopped mid sentence, noticing how Hawke shifted nervously. 

The other templars seemed to have picked up on that as well, as some of them suddenly stood up. “You’re not a mage, are you?” The oldest of the group said. 

Hawke looked at Fenris, nervous. He thought it weird, as in another time, she would have easily lied to them. But then he realized: she was so drunk, even lying seemed impossible to her now, and the templars had already caught her slipping. 

Fenris evaluated the scene. Killing templars would not go well but he also wouldn’t just let them take Hawke. His jaw clenched, as he moved his hand towards his sword. 

But, before he could act, Varric moved to his side, addressing the templars. “This is Enchanter Hawke from the Circle of Magi in Ferelden, she was sent here by order of King Alistair himself to help with the apostates and this is how you treat her?” He lied and then scoffed. “I remember a time in which your order was more respectable than that.” 

It was the templars turn to gulp. “But she-she-”

“She what?” Varric interrupted him. “Had a little too much to drink? Aren’t you doing the same?” He threw his hands in the air, exasperated. “Maker forbid anyone try to have some fun around here.” 

The templars all looked at each other, panicking. “Madam, I-”

“Oh sod it off. You harassed her enough.” The dwarf stepped in front of the templar. “If I were you, I’d run from here before she decides to tell the Knight-Commander how awful you’ve been treating such an honorable guest of the king.” 

The man nodded, picked up his things and all the templars silently exited the tavern. 

For a moment, everything stilled as no one moved, unsure of what to do.  

Varric motioned to the bards. “Why’d you stop the music?” He said, and they began playing again. He then turned to the barkeeper. “And you - one round of drinks for everyone here, on my tab.” The people cheered and went back to their usual drinking and talking. 

“Thank y-you, Varric.” Hawke said, through hiccups. 

“Couldn’t let the templars mess with my favorite human, could I?” He said, and then turned to Fenris. “You make sure she gets home in one piece, ok.” 

The elf nodded, leading Hawke outside the Hanged Man. It was only then that he realized he was still holding onto her wrist, though she seem to mind - or maybe, she hadn’t noticed yet. Either way, he let go and the two began making their way to Gamlen's house. 

Usually, they wouldn’t have taken long, but due to Hawke tripping every five seconds and getting the way wrong, they had barely walked anything. After the tenth time she stumbled upon nothing, Fenris had enough. 

Without a word, he picked up Hawke, one hand underneath her knees and the other supporting her back. 

“Woah” She said before holding onto him for support. “You’re tall.” 

“I’m not that tall.” He said and then huffed. “You’re heavier than you look.”

Hawke hiccuped. “Ar-are you calling me fat?”

“No.” 

“Good.” She said, and put her head on his chest. For a moment, he thought of how close they were, how he’d never been that physically close to someone before. When he first got his markings, the pain was so unbearable, he refrained from others. But now, it was just a dull ache, one he could avoid if he didn’t think too much about it. Maybe it had been so long that he never realized they didn’t hurt as much. 

Or maybe it was-

“Great, we’re killing templars now.”  His thoughts were interrupted by Hawke saying that in a funny voice, followed by a chuckle. 

“What?” 

“Isn’t that what you…you said once? That one time, in the place with the people.” She explained. “You sound so…exasperated at the thought of killing templars.” 

“Why are you bringing this up now?” 

“Because” she paused to take a deep breath “you looked like you were going to do your….your ripping out heart thing. You were…glowing.” 

Fenris said nothing. 

“Would you?” She asked. 

“Would I what?”

“Would you have killed him? The templar?” 

Fenris thought of his answer for a moment, before saying “Yes.” 

“What?” Hawke said, flabbergasted. “Stop, stop, put me down.” She struggled until he did so. She wobbled at first, but then looked at him. “You would have?”

He crossed his arms. “Yes, Hawke, I would have.” 

“Why?”

“You’d rather I rat you out to them?” Fenris said, deflecting. 

“No…but you could have.” She said. Then, Hawke groaned, dragging her hands down her face. “You’re so confusing to me.”

He raised a brow. “How so?” 

Hawke inhaled deeply, walking around as she spoke.“Every time we encounter some mage and templar, you always take their side, and then you pester me about it when I let the mages go scot-free and I don’t know, you’re always complaining about us and this and that, and I just…” she sighed, frowning and shaking her head “I didn’t…I didn’t think you’d kill a templar for a mage.” 

“Not a mage.” He said. “You.” 

She looked at him, her expression softening. “Fenris-” She whispered.

“We should get to your home soon.” He cut her off and continued walking. “Before any thugs decide to rob us and you’re in condition to be fighting.” 

Hawke gasped offended, walking next to him. “I can handle myself.” 

“When you’re sober. You can’t even walk a straight line.” Fenris commented on how wobbly her walk was.

She only huffed and walked ahead of him, saying “I’ll show you who can’t walk straight, you ass.” 

Fenris chuckled at her antics, the rest of the walk silent as the two finally reached Gamlen’s house. 

“You know, with luck, I’ll be buying the estate back soon.” Hawke said, walking the steps to the front door. “We should celebrate when it happens.” 

“Only if you promise not to get this drunk again.” Fenris smirked. 

Hawke gave him a smile. “You know I don’t make promises I can’t keep.” 

He chuckled and nodded. “Take care, Hawke.” Fenris said before walking away. 

“I’ll try.” She whispered but he was already too far gone.

.

Three years had passed since her expedition to the Deep Roads. 

Three years since Carver became a Grey Warden. 

And three years of constantly thinking about him. 

Fenris.

The more time she spent with him, the more Hawke developed feelings for Fenris, and she did not know what to do with that. It seemed to her that the more they bickered and disagreed, the more she liked him.

It didn’t make sense. 

They’d argue about the right of mages, and he’d stare her down, looking at her with rage, and yet, Hawke would feel a heat spreading in her cheeks. She’d shake her head and turn away, hoping he didn’t notice it. 

She shouldn’t feel like this, not when Fenris spoke of how ‘evil’ all mages were. It was wrong, and yet, she couldn’t help but blush when he looked at her that intensely. 

Hawke didn’t remember who said it, but she once heard how the line between love and hate was thin. But Fenris didn’t hate her, which meant that…

No. He didn’t love her and she didn’t love him. 

Right? 

She didn’t love him, Hawke would tell herself whenever she began thinking about him. They were just friends. That was why she wanted to take all his worries away, to show him that there was so much more to his life than just revenge. 

It was because of friendship that she always seemed to look out for him in battle, even if she knew he was capable of handling himself. And that was why she worried about him, checking on him more than the others to be sure he was doing well. Why she cared about him and what he thought of her, why she wanted to prove him wrong about mages. 

Why she looked at him and wondered what his skin would feel like against hers, his breath on her neck, his whispers on her ear. 

But Hawke could only sigh. They weren’t friends. Fenris disagreed with almost everything she did. They were rivals, too different from each other to ever reach some sort of common ground. 

She didn’t love him because she couldn’t love him. They were too different to ever work together. 

. 

Fenris thought he was getting sick. Or better yet, Hawke must have cast some spell on him because why couldn’t he get her off his head?

Of course she would put something on him to control his thoughts, make him more agreeable and compliant. She was a mage after all, and he knew they were all the same, never to be trusted. 

Fenris sighed. Hawke would never do that and he knew. Yes, they disagreed on almost everything and got into more arguments than he had the patience for, and Hawke was a bloody mage but still, he knew she wouldn’t do that. She wouldn’t mess with his thoughts or deny him his independence. 

He hated that in the time they’d known each other, she proved herself trustworthy to him. He knew that she was the one casting healing spells on him during combat (Maker knows Anders would die before doing that). She’d go to his house and listen to him, even though he rarely had anything to say. Even when they played Wicked Grace, she didn’t cheat as much as the others. 

Hawke was a woman that spoke her mind, even if it got her in trouble. Whether it was to flirt and tease or to sass someone, she wasn’t afraid to say it. And even though it made him a bit embarrassed, Fenris liked it when she called him handsome. 

He wasn’t supposed to feel this way. She was a mage. It was mages that made as miserable as he was right now, who took everything from him. Fenris had seen first hand what mages could do if they were allowed too much freedom and yet, there was Hawke. 

Sighing, Fenris opened another of the Aggregio bottles, taking a swing from it. He wanted to hate her, needed to hate her…then why did his mind kept wandering to thoughts of her. Her and her smile, her laughter, her smirk, her eyes, her hair-

“By the Maker,” he thought “she’ll be the death of me.” 

. 

When Hawke arrived at Fenris' house, Isabela was leaving. The pirate winked at her but didn’t say anything as Hawke entered the room. 

“Three years.” Fenris said, looking elsewhere as she sat on the empty chair. “There’s still no sign of Danarius. I’m beginning to wonder if he’s finally given up.” 

She frowned. “But isn’t this his mansion? Surely, he must know you’re here.”

Fenris turned to her. “Would you be surprised to know that this isn’t, in fact, his mansion?”

“Oh?” 

“It belongs to a Tevinter merchant, one who has evidently given up on the place. Perhaps he is dead. Perhaps Danarius killed him.” 

She chuckled. “He was probably killed.  

“Why do you think so?”

“Tevinters. Never seen them give up on something that they claim belongs to them.” She said. “Besides, isn’t that what they do? Kill each other to get their possessions?” 

Fenris smirked. “Careful. You’re starting to sound like me.” 

She shrugged. “What can I say, you’re rubbing off on me.” 

He shook his head. “Either way, if Danarius is aware of my presence, he has done nothing.” 

“Don’t tell me you’re going to miss the attention.” Hawke said with a raised brow. 

He said nothing, as he looked away, and for a moment, she wondered if she said something wrong. A small moment of silence passed until he spoke again. 

“Tell me: what do you do when you stop running?” Fenris asked, looking at Hawke. 

She looked at him quizzically, then took a deep breath, thinking on the answer. 

“I guess it depends on what you want to do. Some people would go back to what they did before.”

“But I am asking you.” 

Hawke sighed. “My opinion is that you should start anew.” 

“Why?” 

“Because if you don’t, you’ll look back and realize you spent your whole life hunting ghosts of the past instead of actually living.” She shook her head, looking down. “Our past will always be a part of us. It doesn’t mean it has to shape our future too. 

” 

“But what if you can’t forget what happened to you? What if it keeps catching up to you.” 

“Then you keep moving forward.” She looked up at him, knowing he was talking about himself. “You don’t have to forget, Fenris. But you can let go.” 

“I don’t know how.” He frowned slightly. “My first memory is receiving these markings, the lyrium branded into my flesh. The agony wiped away everything. Whatever life I had before I became a slave…it’s lost.” He stood up abruptly. “I shouldn’t trouble you with this. My problems are not yours.” 

For a second, she didn’t know what to say. But as a smirk began forming in her face, she found the perfect opportunity to tease him. “I might be able to help with your problems…” she raised a brow “or give you a few more.” 

He crossed his arms. “More problems than you probably do, I assume.” 

She gasped dramatically, a hand on her chest. “Me? Causing problems? Never.” 

Fenris chuckled, amused as she laughed at herself. “You’re a beautiful woman, Hawke. Is there no one else who has your…attention?” He asked. 

That caught Hawke by surprise, as a blush spread on her face. 

Fenris thought she was beautiful? 

Moreover, he wouldn’t ask if there was anyone else if he wasn’t interested in her…would he? 

In other circumstances, she’d probably say something witty. Now, however, she chose to say “Do you see anyone else here?” 

Fenris uncrossed his arms. “I’m an escaped slave, and an elf, living on a borrowed mansion. None of those things bother you?” He asked. 

“And I’m an apostate refugee.” She replied. “Does that bother you?”

“You have me there.” He took in a breath. “You raise an interesting point. I’ll have to…consider it.” 

Hawke stood up from her seat. “I’ll leave you to your thinking then. It is getting late.” She said and left. 

On her walk home - which was not too far from Fenris’ home - she pondered on what he had said. Did he think that his status as an ex-slave, as an elf, would make her want him less?

Hawke allowed herself to hope that her feelings were reciprocated. That Fenris was starting to change his mind on mages. 

That comment… ‘You’re a beautiful woman, Hawke.’ She kept replaying that sentence in her head again and again as she lay in bed. It wasn’t the first time someone had said that, but somehow, it coming from him felt…different. Special. 

‘Witch’ he called Merrill. ‘Abomination’ he called Anders. ‘Dangerous’ he called every other mage. 

But Hawke, he had called ‘beautiful’. She shouldn’t be blushing lie a girl as she was, especially with how he treated the others but she couldn’t help it. And so, that night, Hawke went to sleep with a smile on her face. 

. 

Not too long after their last conversation, Fenris called Hawke to his mansion again. When she arrived, he was already drinking. 

She shook her head at the sight. 

“Last bottle of the Aggreio. I’ve been saving it for a special occasion.” He offered the bottle to her. 

“And what’s that?” She asked and drank from the wine. 

“The anniversary of my escape. Astia valla femundis.” Fenris said as she gave him the bottle back, his voice showing the first signs of drunkenness. “Care to hear the story?” 

She leaned back on her chair. “Of course.” She said “I do enjoy listening to you talk.” 

Hawke saw a corner of his mouth turn upwards in a half smirk. “There are few pleasures greater than speaking with a beautiful woman.” 

Once again, she blushed, seeing his smirk widen at it. 

She shook her head. “Flatterer.” 

“What can I say? I told you I’d practice it.” He cleared his throat. “Let’s see. You’ve heard of Seheron? The Imperium and the Qunari have fought over the island for centuries now.” Hawke nodded and he continued. 

“I was there with Danarius during a Qunari attack. I managed to get him to a ship - but there was no room for a slave. I was left behind. I barely got out of the city alive.” 

Hawke raised both eyebrows. “Well, nothing like a war to cover one’s escape.”

“I had no intention of escaping.” He clarified. “That time.” 

Fenris explained how a group of rebels - the Fog Warriors - found him and helped him. How they were free and didn’t want to give him back to Danarius.

“He ordered me to kill them. So I did. I killed them all.” 

“Once a slave always a slave?” She said

He looked down. “It felt inevitable. My master had returned and this, this fantasy life was over. But once it was over, I looked down at their bodies. I felt…I couldn’t…” He didn’t finished the sentence, looking away. “I ran. And never looked back.” 

The two of them were silent for a moment. 

“You have questions.” Fenris said, looking at Hawke. “Ask them.” 

“How well did you know these Fog Warriors?” 

“I only knew them a few months, but in that time, I felt as if I truly lived.” He said. “They were bold. Strong. Free with their affections. I was in awe of them, and owed them everything. And I turned on them even so.” 

“But then, why didn’t you escape Danarius earlier?”

“You were not a slave. A slave does not dream of freedom, or wonder at possibilities. You think only of your master’s desires, and what the next hour will bring. It did not occur to me that I could be anything else until I had a taste of it.” He spoke in a soft tone. 

Although Hawke had other questions, she decided to stop there. She looked at him and said “Thank you for sharing this with me. It can’t be easy to talk about it.”

He took a swing from the bottle. “I have never spoken about what happened to anyone. I’ve never wanted to. You and I don’t always agree but…” 

Fenris stopped, as if measuring his next words and he looked at her…pained? ashamed? There was an emotion in his eyes that she couldn’t quite figure out. 

“You were saying?” 

“I…have never allowed anyone too close.” He said. “When my markings were created, the pain was…extraordinary. And the memory lingers.” Hawke frowned at that, but her face quickly softened as he said the next words “But you are unlike any women I’ve ever met. With you it might be different.” 

“We could find out.” She said. 

“On another evening, perhaps.” 

Hawke’s heart hammered in her chest as she felt the heat rising once again to her cheeks at the prospect that her feelings for him were not one-sided. As she noticed the half smirk on his face, due to her reaction, she decided to deflect for a moment.

“Does that mean that you’ve never…”

He shrugged. “If there was someone before, I have no memory of it.”

She inhaled. “And after you escaped?”

“I stayed nowhere for long. Who would I even trust?”

“And you trust me?” 

“You sound surprised.” 

“Well, I just…you’re always wary around mages. I wouldn’t put it past you to never trust me.” 

A small smile began to form on his face. “At first, I didn’t. I thought you mages to be all the same. I kept waiting for the moment you’d prove my suspicions. But it never came.” Fenris took a deep breath. “I didn’t think I needed anyone. Or wanted anyone.” He looked at her through half lidded eyes “Until now.” 

Hawke felt hot. She leaned forwards and grabbed the bottle from his hand. “I’ll be the one needing this now.” She said before taking a swing from it and returning it to him. 

Fenris raised the bottle high “A last toast, then: to the fallen.”

[regardingjenmish]

Just a tiny “review” of the new album

Okay so these are just some first thoughts I had while listening to the album. No, fr i just wrote it down on post it notes while listening so half of it probably makes zero sense

First thought: Jensen absolutely KILLED it on this album. Second thought: oh this is why it took so long because Jensen was busy working and this is a lot of Jensen. Lowkey his album ngl Right Kind of trouble: A little more vibey and chill than it was at the concert. Jensen obviously sounds amazing and the song is for sure still a favorite. I love the piano solo towards the end and when the song speeds up it becomes even better just like at the concert if that makes sense(?)

Forever ain’t long: Jensen, sir?!?!?!?! his voice is insane and I’m obsessed. I love this song and once again the piano/guitar solo makes the whole thing even better. The song is beautiful, it is a little slow but it’s amazing. And again HIS VOICE

Every Light: that’s Dean’s song idc I didn’t make the rules. I am still obsessed with the ‘booze and cheap tattoos’ lyric, especially because of how Jackles sings it. (also the violin in the back is perfect)

Ain’t no tellin: JENSEN??? The voice!!!! It has a really familiar vibe and i love it. His voice sounds fucking amazing (i swear this is a remark on every song and no one is surprised)

You made me blue: It’s a nice song, obviously a little sad and Steve is the one singing it..

Keep on ramblin’: Jensen bby.. at this point just give me a solo album please. I like the lyrics. It makes me think of something/a feeling that I can’t put a finger on right now. It kind of makes me think of just playing this song while you’re driving in the middle of the night with the windows down even tho it’s not that type of song im sorry idk how to explain it, i did say it won’t make sense

Sweet Escape: hey steve

Return to me: it’s a lovely song that’s more calm and it’s both of them so the vibe is pretty good. it does make me think of like a movie scene where people are slow dancing and someone is just about to leave in the middle of the night idk how to explain otherwise fjdhjfksjs

Restless man: Jensen???? sir, your voice is making me emotional!! I can’t handle this shit! the lyrics are also a little sad. I don’t know how else to explain except that it reminds me of a goodbye from a certain type of life? Nothing bad or sad, just that feeling when you realize a certain moment is ending or beginning idk leave me alone its 1 am however that could be me projecting bc im going through it jshdkjskd. When he sings ‘I found out long ago’ i fucking love the way he sings it, his voice sounds absolutely amazing are we really surprised. And I love the song, especially when it picks up a little bit.

Velvet sky: It’s a nice calm down to end the album especially after Jensen absolutely killed it. Steve is the one singing (Jensen joins in a little bit) and it’s pretty good song. good way to end it.

[in-my-feels-probably]

Congratulations on 400 followers!! That's so exciting! (this might be crap because English is not my first language)

This idea is fun but it makes me melancholic since my favourite character is Remus Lupin; the more I saw the films and read the books the more I was drawn to him... He was kind, a great teacher, he suffered more than I could ever take but at the same time I could empathize to his loneliness and insecurities as a child.

As I started to get older and getting more involved in the fandom as a teen and now young adult, I began seeing him in a romantic way and I guess two things happened: 1) I know what it feels to be (or feel) alone and unworthy of love, so I'd want him to NOT feel like that and just shower him with affection and give him a well-deserved hug; and 2) we already have his sweet and mature demeanor shown in the books so the rest of his personality and likes are 100% up to us - the reader. I, like many, picture him as a Welsh man who always carries chocolate with him, who loves literature and has a high emotional intelligence.

I always wanted to get a HP tattoo but something that was only mine... and I knew it had to be related to Remus. After months of thinking one post came up in my dashboard that read "the word or phrase that most accompained Remus Lupin throughout the series is simply 'Lupin smiled'" and I knew it. Now I have a part of him forever ♡

hi! thank you for participating :)

don't worry, your english is great, thank you for all the detail.

i adore remus, he's one of my favorite characters ever. and i'm so jealous of your tattoo, that's such a sweet idea. i've been considering a HP themed tattoo too, but idk what i would get yet.

i can't imagine going through the suffering that he did, and all the loss he experienced. and after all of it, he was still so willing to love and sacrifice. he holds a special place in my heart. i'd give him a giant hug if i could, he deserves one.

i'm glad you see him how i do, and i'm happy to see how much he means to you :)

so, my songs for you are:

fourth of july by sufjan stevens - particularly the lyrics "did you get enough love, my little dove, why do you cry?" and "shall we look at the moon, my little loon" and "we're all gonna die." i highly recommend all of sufjan's work, although i will warn you that it's sad. something about this song just hits me deep, and it makes my heart ache in the same way that remus does, if that makes sense.

we fell in love in october by girl in red - this song is really soft, and about love, and it just evokes fall to me. remus is such a fall character

yellow by coldplay - "look at the stars, look how they shine for you, and everything you do." there's something about the symbolism of stars that always gets me. i guess its kinda how i see remus as the moon and sirius as the stars. idk, but this song feels full of love, and i hope remus got to feel a love like that.

beautiful boy by john lennon - "close your eyes, have no fear. the monsters gone, he's on the run, and your daddy's here. beautiful beautiful beautiful, beautiful boy." idc what anyone says, remus is a beautiful boy, and i hope he knows it. every beautiful boy deserves to be told so.

good old-fashioned lover boy by queen - something about remus gives off the 80's to me, rock in particular. and despite what anyone might say, remus is the casanova of gryffindor tower, he deserves a song that matches that. i'm not entirely sure remus would like queen, but i think they would remind him of his friends, and that makes me smile.

i hope you like these songs, sorry if any of them aren't your taste. thank you again for participating, and than you for your kind words. hope you enjoy :)

[sir-crocodile-smile]

Hello Smile, I saw your inbox opening and thought I'd try my chances! Could we get some headcanons for first times (e.g. first meeting, first kiss, first date...) headcanons for Sanji and Law? Thank you in advance, I hope you're having a great time. ♡

OMG MY FIRST REQUEST (((o(*ﾟ▽ﾟ*)o)))

I will try to do these boys justice! I’m fairly new so pls bear with me!

Sanji

First Meeting

Ah, my son!! look at my beautiful boy

Sanji saw you while you were working at a stall in a market on your home island and immediately swooned

He spun like a top over to you, full heart-eyes, asking if the beautiful angel on earth before him would grace him with the knowledge of her name

He immediately follows up with introducing himself, asking if you would be so kind as to dine with him this evening

“Sure! Why not?” You giggle. And Sanji is. Shocked.

This. Never. Works. And yet here you are, smiling like the sun.

His face turns red as he stumbles over his words now, eyes still hearts but now he’s too flustered to make direct eye contact

He didn’t know it, but from this moment forward, his life would change

First Date

Your first date is that evening, as promised. Sanji prepares a delightful mix of food for you, since he isn’t sure what you like yet, and brings you on a picnic on a grassy hill

(this totally isn’t him freaking out that you actually said yes. not at all. he completely intended this 100% and is not one bit flying by the seat of his pants. he’s completely lying to himself calm)

He’s a perfect gentleman, treating this picnic blanket like the finest restaurant in the world

The food is amazing of course, and he takes mental notes on what you like, blushing so hard when you complement it that you’re worried he might pass out

He starts to relax a little and ask you about your life, get to know you some more. He’s not expecting you to be so interested in his life, his adventures with the Strawhat crew, but feels his heart come through his shirt when he sees how your face lights up with each story

The date ends, and he walks you home, bending to place a single kiss on the back of your hand before you go

First Kiss

You traded den-den mushi numbers before the Strawhats left the island. You and Sanji call each other regularly, usually when he’s cooking

He looks forward to talking with you so much. The second he hears your voice he shouts “Y/N -SWAAAAN!!! I missed your beautiful voice!!! How are you today?”

He thinks about you all the time, wondering how you are, missing your smile. The ache in his chest every time he thinks of you becomes unbearable

One night while on a call with him you sigh dreamily, “I wish I could go on adventures with you all”. He gets very quiet, asking if that’s what you really want.

As soon as he says yes, he’s out of the kitchen like a shot, begging Luffy to turn around. He bribes Luffy with promises of great food, and that you’d make a great addition to the crew. He’s so passionate, tears starting to well in his eyes, and when Luffy and the crew see how important you are to Sanji, of course they let you join!

Sanji is first off the ship when they arrive, running to you at full speed. You open your arms to him and he lifts you by your waist and spins you around, both of you laughing

When he finally calms down from the thrill of seeing you again, he sets you down and asks you quietly if this is what you truly want. The life of a pirate is dangerous, it’s unpredictable, but if you want to come with him, he swears to protect you no matter what it takes.

Your arms hug around his neck as you tell him there’s nothing you want more. Your faces are so close together, noses nearly touching. You can feel the heat coming from his blushing face. He slowly, gently leans in for a soft, tender kiss, communicating without words how much he cares for you.

And then poor Sanji goes directly into cardiac arrest lol

Omg this turned into a mini-fic. I probably spent too long on this but idc! It’s my first request, it gets to be special.

Law under the cut b/c LONG

Law

First Meeting

Law firsts spots you when he’s conducting research at a library on his route through the Grand Line. At first it’s with a little annoyance in his eyes; you’re reading one of the books he was interested in

But he’s a patient man, he can read something else while waiting for you to finish. You catch him staring at you multiple times, his intense eyes burning a hole in you

Eventually you just ask him what the hell his problem is. He smirks, and tells you not to be so jumpy. He’s just waiting for you to finish with that book

You, to his surprise, suggest he just sit next to you and read over your shoulder. He’s tall enough to. He hesitates. You playfully joke, “Come on, I don’t bite”. You don’t seem to be intimidated by him at all

You read together for a good while, both politely pausing to let the other take notes. Law hums every now and again when he reads something that catches his attention. At some point he gets so absorbed in the text that he starts to lean closer, his breath ghosting over your neck

You don’t see a single word on that page

“Shame I missed the first part...” he mutters when you both are done. You smile and offer to copy the notes you made and give them to him. His eyebrows pop up in surprise and a slow, relaxed smile begins to spread on his face

“Same time tomorrow...” he begins, flipping open the cover of the book to read your name on the check-out slip. “Y/N-ya?” Your face grows hot as you nod to him, tongue-tied.

He walks away casually, before you remember to ask for his name

First Date

You and Law are doing research together, as you usually do. He stretches, letting out a yawn

“I need coffee. You coming with me, Y/N-ya?”

Of course you do. How can you say no to this man?

He insists on paying for you both, teasing that there’s no way your pockets go as deep as his (he’s right, but heyyy)

You make casual conversation, both sipping on your coffee and enjoying the break from research. The conversation lulls, but it’s a comfortable silence as you gaze out the window of the cafe.

Something brushes your fingertips. You turn to see Law’s fingertips just barely interlaced with yours. He’s looking out the window, avoiding your eyes

In this moment, the strong, capable captain of the Heart Pirates looks timid, like your hand is a bear trap he’s reaching into against his better judgement. You gently move your hand closer to his, thumb brushing the tattoos on his fingers to soothe him

He lets out a breath he was holding in, small smile coming to his face, warmth spreading in his chest

You guys definitely argue about whether this was technically a date or not later lol

First Kiss

“You stay right here, Y/N-ya”, Law says, setting you down in a hiding spot away from the violence and commotion that broke out

You argue with him. You can fight! He knows you can. You are perfectly capable of taking care of yourself, and he shouldn’t go out there alone

This is not up for discussion in Law’s opinion. He’s a cautious man to his core, but this was a little extreme

You’re already pushing past him to head into the fray with your comrades when he grabs you by the shoulders and pulls you back

You’re about to yell when his lips are on yours, stealing your thoughts and breath. He kisses you fiercely, passionately, pulling away to gasp for breath

You’re both a little stunned as he rests his forehead to yours

“I need you to be safe...” he whispers. You nod, not willing to argue with him anymore after realizing how much he cares about you

He steals one more kiss, softly this time but with so much need, before turning to join his crew in the fight

HOO BOY that was a lot!! I hope things weren’t too OOC, this is my first time writing for these lovely boys. I hope you enjoy this!!

[normal-thoughts-official]

I.t.a (Identity thief anon)

I thought I had replied (if I did and you just hadn't post it it's 1000% fine ahshs)

I love Elliott so much!! And his crush is so cute (but also looking at the bigger picture is hilarious that I killed his would be father in law lmao) also awfullest thing pixelberry did was making me choose if I wanted to be his legal guardian or if I wanted him to be emancipated only to not have to do any of them since, you know, our grandpa was still alive...

Also I thought about it way too much for a choice (with no actual impact) in a game ahshshshhs, emotionally wise I'd have wanted to be his legal guardian but I think it'd make more sense (legally) emancipation because he would still get government help but there wouldn't be a risk of someone taking him away of in case I wasn't a successful guardian, and he could apply for scholarships more easily while I worked or something lmao I was just excited in that part.

I know there are some books in which you can be poly but the only I remember was moty (mother of the year) which was a better than expected book (to be fair I didn't goof have expectations) and in that one I started to date the three love interests <3

How far along are you in endless summer, who are you romancing, what do you think of the classmates + lila and what do you think about the story in general 👀

u hadnt replied!!!! hi i missed you!!

i didnt know u could be polyam in moty! i might try it out then, i never gave it a shot cuz i hate the idea of having kids 😬 but anything for rep i guess

and YEAH I KNOW DIDNDIDNDO i love elliot so much and him and robbie are SO cute together but damn his in law straight up tried to kill us huh. like robbie deserves better than bobert or whatever his name is and im glad to have killed him but

also okay im in the middle of the second book idnfidndidndo around the part where the arachnids show up for jake. my opinions so far are kind of messy but uhhh

grace and raj are my faves, hands down. craig is a close second

i like almost everyone except for jake because hes just military propaganda in a trenchcoat with that annoying wahh im too conflicted to care about anyone white boy complex, and aleister because he was a dick to grace. idc how much he simps for her now she deserves better than him. and Quinn is kind of whatever. like her whole personality is uwu and its kind of annoying but i dont hate her or anything

the story is such a fucking mess?? udndidn i have NO CLUE whats going on 😩 if they manage to make everything make sense by the end ill be REALLY impressed cuz damn wtf is going on

im romancing sean!!!!!! what can i say, i have a type and that type is self sacrificial idiot. he has a heart of gold and he deserves better and aaaa 😭😭 u idiot man stop putting ur life in danger as the instinctual reaction BLEASE. i just want to wrap him in a blanket and make him take care of himself for once

i also like estela a lot but im not really that interested in romancing her ig? i enjoy our moments together but my feelings for her are more casual ig

i rlly want to like lila but i cannot stand her simping for discount tony stark my god. please lord just make it end

i rlly like everyone's dynamics???? its so nice to see how the group has been growing together more and more. i love them ❤️

i LOVE the vaanti. every last one of them. my beloveds. if they tried to kill us it's cuz theyre valid

varyyn and diego are the greatest couple this game has ever given me i am SO grateful for them. i just got to their first kiss and aaaaaa it was so sweet. upset at choices for not giving me art of their kiss when i had to watch aleister and grace's but 😩 its fine im fine. holding onto hope that ill get art of them eventually but i dont want to look it up and risk spoiling myself

i actually like craig and zahra as a couple a lot too which i didnt expect. i still dont fully understand what happened between them but i really hope they work it out :(

on that note i love zahra. anticapitalist queen. cant believe she fucking hacked wall street. id die for this woman even tho she wasted tiramisu

tbh i dont wanna get off the island. like what for? to go to college? when i could stay with the cool vaanti culture and be happy and not have to worry about capitalism and have sick ass tattoos? lets just kill tony stark and stay there besties

really like how they made the MC's past a mystery? like yeah we have absolutely zero past and backstory as per usual but this time it actually is an integral part of the story that we dont know that we were born in la huerta or basically anything about ourselves truly (even tong stinky didn't so like?). and it was nice to see that being a part of the story rather than just this weird feeling of detachment from the MC

the MC is so stupid and i love him

sean and craig are gay for each other. michelle and quinn are gay for each other. i diagnose everyone with gay

i literally dont have a single theory as to what the hell is going on like not one. and i have gotten almost every clue/idol/file but like i literally have no idea how to tie all of this together. this is such a mess didndkdndkdndidn im kind of excited to see what happens because ES seems to be so popular in the fandom i can only imagine the plot is gonna blow my mind, but im kind of afraid of being disappointed

and thats all ive got so far i think? udndidjd god

[yikeswtfmate]

Peonies

Pairing: Tattoo Artist! Steve Rogers x Reader

Summary: Steve has a new client who knows exactly what she wants. And a tattoo.

Word Count: 3.5k

Warnings: language; filth F I L T H, i’m not joking this is smut (praise kink; slight daddy kink; fingering; slight spanking; unprotected sex; hair pulling??? Steve Rogers’ face??????????)

A/N: listen. LISTEN. Steve Rogers has been the bane of my existence for too many days to count now, so i had to let it all out somehow, ok? @the-chocolate-moose is the sole reason for me unleashing this filth on you all so go yell at her if you don’t like my first ever attempt at smut, i can’t be held responsible

A/N2: THIS is what prompted this whole thing; have these images in your heads as well, so now sit back and enjoy this fuckery

A/N3: @the-chocolate-moose​ suggested i name this Peonies bc “it’s nice and close to penis”; i thought “just fuck me up man idc anymore” would be more fitting

masterlist

Steve is not in the mood today. He’s not in the mood to listen to Nat constantly blowing and popping her gum, he’s not in the mood to watch Sam obsessively clean the leather seats in the entire studio, he’s not in the mood to smell the acrid odour of cigarettes that Bucky brings in with him after he’s had his break.

He’s definitely not in the mood to feel his tshirt sticking to his back and shoulders as he’s working on the design of a new tattoo. With the AC broken, he’s more than grateful for the small autumn breeze that occasionally wafts in through the open doors. Maybe he should just close for the day. After all, none of them have any appointments left and who even comes in to get a tattoo at 4 pm on a Friday?

“Hi.”

Steve looks up from his notebook to be greeted by a woman leaning on the high counter. She’s smiling, a cheeky grin that he’s only ever noticed in regular customers whenever they come up with a new idea for a tattoo. Her fingers tap on the mahogany, indicating nervousness and she tucks a strand of hair behind her ear when he hikes his glasses up on his head.

“Hi.” Steve smiles – customer service force of habit or just because she���s so damn gorgeous? “How can I help you?”

“Well, uh – I’m here for a tattoo obviously.” She says, eyes flashing down for a second. “My friend recommended your studio and I was in the neighbourhood anyway, so I thought I’d stop by to make an appointment.”

“What do you have in mind?” Steve asks, taking out the planner, ready to find a free spot for her.

“Oh, I want my hip covered in peonies.” She says with such nonchalance as if she’s just going to buy some milk.

A quick inspection of the upper part of her body over the counter makes Steve wonder if she does have any tattoos and whether she knows what she’s getting into. His weariness must be written all over his face because she just giggles and waves her hand in dismissal.

“Don’t worry. I have a pretty big back tattoo. I know I’m going to be yours for at least five hours.”

And the way she says it, a corner of her lips raised into a tiny smirk and her head tilting to one side makes Steve lick his lips. He chuckles, shaking his head because he’d be damned if he doesn’t like the way she’s making it sound. He’s more than aware of her eyes on him as he stands up and invites her to take a seat on the couch. Planner and notebook in his hands, he settles down next to her, without failing to notice the way her tight skirt rides up her thighs when she scuttles closer to him.

“Tell me.” He says, glasses back on the bridge of his nose and pen on paper.

“Right, well I want it big.” And there it is, that amused tone in her voice again, but he’s more focused on her fingers brushing the top of her hipbone to the middle of her thigh. “And I want it in illustrative style because I can’t deal with blackwork and watercolours are just too much for me.”

Soon Steve has a pretty clear idea of exactly what she (Y/N, he found out earlier, after she’s repeated his name, tasting it on her tongue like a particularly delicious candy) wants; she seems to know a lot about tattoos, and he would be lying if he would say that doesn’t turn him on just a little bit. Maybe that’s why he can’t help himself from biting his finger, while listening to her. He’s excited to start to work on her tattoo, and he’s more than excited to spend some time with her, so when she asks him whether they’re open on Sunday he doesn’t even take time to consider.

“No, but I can open up only for you.” He offers and he doesn’t miss the thought that can be clearly seen on her face for a split fraction of a second.

“So it would only be the two of us in an empty studio while you’d be working on me for – how many hours did you say? Four?” Her eyes narrow, her voice purring and her fingers lightly graze his forearm.

“At least.” He nods, playing into her game with a smirk.

“Well, then. Being yours for at least four hours does not sound bad at all, Steve.”

“I couldn’t agree more, Y/N.”

*

Bucky and Sam give him hell after Y/N’s left, hooting and hollering like two fucking teenagers. Steve just rolls his eyes at them, ignoring their jabs and lewd jokes, but he doesn’t miss Nat’s knowing smile.

“What?” He snaps when she wouldn’t look away. “What???”

“Nothing.” She shrugs. “It’s just funny how you wouldn’t even show her our portfolios.”

“Why?” He asks defensively. “You don’t do big ink, Bucky only does watercolour and Sam’s on holiday next week anyway.”

“But she’s coming in on Sunday.” Sam points out, chuckling.

“And you seem to have all the answers to support your already possessive behaviour there, punk.” Bucky laughs.

“Fuck off, all of you.” Steve grumbles, already on his way to the back of the studio where he can work in silence on what must be now his new favourite flowers.

“Just make sure you don’t drool on her when you’re gonna tattoo her, bud!” Nat yells after him and he slams the door shut on a wave of laughter.

*

It’s Sunday and Steve looks at the clock right when it turns exactly 4 o’clock. His gaze instinctively turns to the door, but of course he shouldn’t expect her to be there right on the dot. Instead he looks down at the paper, trying to decide whether it’s detailed enough or too detailed? Is it too big? Too small? Would she like it? Would she want to have his work on her body for the rest of her life? And then another shiver runs along his spine, fingers twitching in anticipation, and his cock might pulse just one second at that particular thought – his work on her body for the rest of her life.

Steve’s startled out of his thoughts by a quick rapping on the glass door. She’s standing there, smile already evident on her face and he takes his time observing her as he makes his way over. He silently praises her for choosing a flowing skirt today, he knows that last tight one would’ve been hell on freshly tattooed skin; yet she’s making up for it with a very tight tiny top. Thank fuck for this particularly warm autumn.

“Hi!” She beams, stepping in and letting him lock behind her. “Ready to do me?”

Steve chokes on fucking air, but he has the good sense to start laughing. He’s thankful her back is to him because he already has to adjust his fucking jeans. She’s throwing her bag on the couch, takes in a big breath and turns to look at him, practically vibrating with excitement. Steve raises an eyebrow, but doesn’t comment on it – he knows how addictive the experience can become, his plethora of tattoos can only stand as an example.

“We’re gonna be in the back, babe.” Steve says absentmindedly, as he goes to pick up the hectograph paper.

“Babe?” She remarks, closer to him than he thought, her breath right on his cheek. “I hope you don’t call all your clients that.”

The tips of Steve’s ears turn pink. He hadn’t realised what he said, and he definitely wouldn’t have said it out loud, but every time he’s thought about Y/N in the last days his mind only supplied him with the image of her saying his name, her tongue darting out to wet her lips, her fingers on the tattoos on his right forearm while staring in wonder – babe, be a doll and suck my cock. Pink on his cheeks now as well.

“Come on, big boy. Show me where you want me.” Y/N winks and she’s already sauntering off to the back door.

It’s not his fault that all his blood is rushing to his dick now, it really isn’t. It’s her swaying ass and those long legs that will be completely bare in just a few seconds. Or maybe her inability to say anything without making it sound like an innuendo. Whatever it is, Steve has to readjust his jeans again.

He’s behind her in a few seconds, and he knows she’s doing it on fucking purpose when she steps back into his chest to open the door. She smells like vanilla and patchouli and Steve grunts deep in his throat; she doesn’t even apologise, instead she just tilts her head back until she can look at him and grins.

“You’re really big, did you know that?”

Steve just smirks and with a well-placed hand on her hip, he guides her forward. He can hear the faint giggle; the little minx is playing and she has him lapping from her hands, but two can play at this game, and he doesn’t like losing.

The room is definitely darker than the sunlit reception, but the bright lamp right next to the leather bed makes up for it. It almost feels as if it’s night, and Steve notices the way her back arches just an inch.

She hops on the bed, feet dangling over and she’s holding out her arms, reaching for the paper in his hand. Steve hands it to her without much preamble, and sits down in his chair, set to prepare the ink and his gun. He’s suddenly very aware of the closed door and how small this room is so he’s trying to distract himself in case she’ll be disappointed.

A gasp escapes her lips, making his head snap up. Now or never he supposes, but she’s grinning widely.

“I love it.” She whispers and there’s relief rushing through his entire body. Pleased, more than pleased to be entirely fair – he’s fucking aroused by her praise. Interesting.

“Do you want me to make any changes to it?” Steve asks, remembering that he’s actually supposed to do his job right now, and not get a fucking boner over her glinting eyes. “You’re gonna have this on you for the rest of your life so now’s the time to voice any concerns, sweetheart.”

“No, it’s perfect.” She promises and hands him the paper. Hopping off the bed, she looks at him, maintaining eye contact as she speaks. “Now. Should I get this skirt off or do you wanna do it, babe?”

And there it is. Back to being a little shit, especially when throwing that ‘babe’ back at him. Steve grunts and waves his go ahead, turning back to his gun. He refuses to look at her, to watch her shimmy out of the flowery thing, to look at her legs stepping out of it, to see the smirk on her face that he’s more than sure she’s sporting. He hears that small huff of air she lets out when she lays down, hears the creak of the bed under her body, hears the big inhale he has to take in before he moves his chair to finally face her.

Oh, fuck.

It’s not the long legs or the curve of her thighs or that very glaring dip that he’d so like to explore that do it for him, it’s the panties she’s wearing – red, lacy, small. His hands are hovering above her, blinking lazily over the expanse of skin and she must know now, beyond a shadow of a doubt, exactly what he’s thinking.

“You know,” she purrs from somewhere to his side. He’s not sure, because her thighs are rubbing together now. “I think I’ll have to take these off as well, considering how big it’s going to be.”

And that’s it. Steve’s had enough of it. He looks down at her, sees her teeth sinking into her bottom lip, one hand right above the line of her underwear, the other squeezing the edge of the bed. He grumbles deep in his chest, which makes her pupils dilate even more. Does she want to play then? Fine, he’ll give her something to play with.

“Yes, I think it would be best if you would.” He says, leaning back into his chair, arms crossed in front of his chest.

She’s startled then, confused for a moment at his blatant answer, but it’s easy to read his smirk. Easy to read what an arm over the armrest and a finger in his teeth means, as his tongue darts out to wet his lips – waiting. Are you going to do this? Daring her.

“Come on, baby, are you going to take them off for me?” He prods further, and it seems that does it for her.

Fingers slip under the waistband and he watches as she lifts up her ass, dragging them over her thighs, knees up and completely off. The piece of cloth dangles from her finger, as she offers it to him in her own silent dare. Are you going to do something about this?

“Any other requests, sir?”

His cock twitches once more, as if he isn’t already fucking hard with her half naked in front of him, an inch away from his touch. He stands up, grabs the panties and tucks them in his back pocket.

She squirms under his stare, legs pressed together but he doesn’t like that. One finger on her knee, and he pushes it to the side, then does the same thing with the other one. Pussy on display, his mouth is watering just as much as she’s dripping on the leather.

He leans closer, hands now behind his back and she’s shivering under his breath on her ear.

“Tell me what you want, baby.” He grunts.

A whine and her fingers grab his forearm in a vice like grip. “You know what I want.”

“You have to use your words, Y/N.” Steve tuts.

She groans in frustration, letting her head fall back. “Please, Stevie, I need you to fuck me.”

He smirks then. An eye for an eye, wasn’t it? But she’s pleading and he’s been thinking about fucking her for three days straight already. He’s not in the mood to delay this any further – he’ll have time to savour her inch by inch later. For now, he just wants to fuck her.

He takes off his jeans, already feeling some of the tension leaving him. His boxers follow and he smiles like a Cheshire cat when her reaction is to lick her lips and sit up on the bed in anticipation. She wanted to play, didn’t she?

Steve sits back down on his chair, slowly, languidly and looks up at her. She’s waiting, but he notices the twitch in her fingers, the way her legs press together and she’s squirming on the bed, trying to find some kind of friction. He smiles then – benevolently, like a generous benefactor and raises his eyebrows. What do you want?

“Please.” She moans – practically drooling.

Steve pats his thigh, “Come on, baby. Come here.”

Y/N is on top of him immediately, straddling him, fingers grazing his scalp, tugging at his hair. His hands circle her waist, big hands on her hips and he’s guiding her down until she can rut against his legs. Her lips are on his then, biting, tugging, moaning into his mouth, lapping at each corner, saliva dripping just like her pussy.

“Please, Steve. Please.” She whimpers, because fuck she needs more, she needs so much more, she needs to have him fill her up and Steve is just there, his cock twitching right on her stomach and she can’t take it anymore.

“What do you want, baby?” He grunts, right when his fingers slip inside her folds and yesrightthereyesfuckohfuckStevefuck. “Are you going to cum for me, honey? You going to cum for daddy?”

And shit, she must’ve not known that was something that she likes, because the moment those words leave his lips, as his fingers so expertly pump into her and his thumb is circling her clit, she throws back her head with a scream. Blinding stars and all the lights in the world play right in front of her eyes, and Steve can feel her pussy clenching around his fingers before he takes them out and licks them clean.

Steve waits for her to regain her breath as he kisses her collarbones softly, before he gets annoyed with the fabric between them. He tugs at her top until she weakly raises her arms, allowing him to throw it somewhere she doesn’t really care about. She does, however, care about the fact that he’s also still wearing his tshirt and that’s just a shame because underneath that it’s the most glorious sight she’s ever seen.

The sleeve tattoos are usually entirely on display, but Steve would be lying if he’d say he doesn’t know the effect the eagle on his chest has or the way that BROOKLYN on his abs is always either licked or touched. And of course, her fingers also instantly follow the letters’ path.

“Fuck.” She whispers.

“That’s what I intend to do, sweetheart.” He grins and with one arm around her waist, he has her standing up, pushing her into the bed, ass in the air.

He’s surprised for a second to see the massive lion tattoo on her back, her previous words forgotten somewhere in his hazy mind. She looks at him over her shoulder when his hand traces the lines, before his tongue licks a strip right through the middle of her spine. She arches back, a shudder going through her whole body when she lines herself just perfectly to him. Steve has to steady her with his hands on her hips before she starts rutting against him again.

“Steve, please.” She mewls and he hears the leather hissing under her fingers.

“Manners.” He grunts, lining himself just right.

“Oh, fuck you, Steve!” She seethes, but her words turn into a moaning hiss when a slap crackles on her ass.

“I said manners, baby.”

A low growl, but she knows what he wants. “Please, daddy. Please, I need you to fuck me, please, I can’t. I just – please, please, please.”

Her chant fills the small room, turning into an entire litany of profanities and obscene noises the moment Steve enters her. He groans when he feels her so tight and wet and warm around him and fuck he’d stay like this forever, if she wouldn’t push back into him, asking him to move already. She settles her forehead on the bed when his large hands squeeze her hips almost painfully, dragging himself slowly back, and then thrusting into her with force. He continues his ministrations painstakingly slowly, until she starts meeting his thrusts.

“Fuck, faster, please. Please, Steve.” She pants, hands scrabbling at the edge of the leather.

Steve grunts when she starts moving again, but a hand in her hair keeps her in place. He starts thrusting deeper, faster, rougher, and her head falls back into the bed, letting him do all the work because fuck if she could keep up with this.

“Is this what you wanted, baby? You wanted me to fuck you hard?” Steve grunts.

Her words are slurred in response, but he picks up the slew of ‘yes’ and ‘fuck’ and ‘shit’ and his name – his name falling off her lips like a delicious chant, and he’s never heard anything more perfect than the sound of his pounding into her, her moans and his name from her mouth. He can already feel her walls clenching around his cock, so he drags her up by her hair, until her back is pressed to his chest, hand around her throat. Her head falls back onto his shoulder, giving him plenty of access to bite along her neck.

“Are you going to cum for me, baby? Come on, sweetheart, cum for me. Be a good girl and cum for me.”

His movements are becoming frantic, and he removes his hand from her hip to bring it to her clit, rubbing circles on the sensitive bud. She’s whimpering now, breathless and a fucking mess, yet he’s never seen her more beautiful than right in this moment, right when she’s coming undone around his cock. He’s right behind her, the moment he sees her eyes roll back into her head, feeling her go slack in his arms. A growl deep within his chest and they’re both sagging over the bed, spent and fucked into oblivion.

He slips out and she lets out a low hiss at the sudden emptiness. Steve watches the way his cum drips along her thighs, and would care more about how much cleaning up and disinfecting he’s going to have to do later if it weren’t for her nails on his forearm. He looks at her, a smile on his own lips in reply to her blissful grin.

“I think I’m relaxed enough to have that tattoo now.”

[porthecrawl-witness]

Hey, I'm so glad to see you're still working on this! I wanted to gush over on CoG but a n x i e t y. :'D I really love your world building, and every character is memorable in their own way. I just wanna squish everyone (especially Faye and Elle and Talbot, my bebes)

That said, I've decided to dub Talbot my gumdrop (he's colorful, can be a lot to chew on, not everyone's favorite but he sticks to you and has his own unique flavor, and the people who love him do a lot) idc if he can hold his own, I will throw down over this one if there's a fight lol. How would he react to that kind of thing? Also, how would the ROs feel about pet names in general?

Alsooo because I can't gush enough, I'm really glad to see nice ace options, being demi myself. You're great, you're doing great, I'd totally buy you desserts and caffeine. K thanks I'm gonna stop now before I embarrass myself.

...I...can I just have a minute to scream to myself, because thank you so much?

And, trust me, I get the anxiety thing! I’m working through it! Seriously, anon, I really appreciate you reaching out with the kind words.

...also...gumdrop? (I’m sorry, I’m incoherent) the way you’ve described Talbot is perfect, and really reassuring to me that the character has come across as I’d hoped!

So...I hope you don’t mind (and this probably wasn’t what you were asking for, but your message meant a lot to me when I needed to hear it!)...but...*ahem* a hypothetical situation, post throw-down in Talbot’s defense, huh?...

...each breath feels an effort, though not quite your own. These...assholes, you think, wishing you had the presence of mind to call them something else, had come out of nowhere.

They hadn't liked his look, they said. Or the way he had talked to them when they'd tried to approach you in the bar.

Their mistake had been following you outside. Talbot had taken some persuading to leave, but -- when he'd realized how serious you were -- he'd acquiesced with only a silent gesture toward the door.

He'd slipped his blue coat around you on your way out.

Funny, it's still there. As much a part of you as it is of him.

You've never been in a fight before. Not any meaningful one. It leaves your hands shaking -- trembling. Like a child who can't separate the nightmare of a thunderstorm from reality.

They had followed you out, the group of them, threatened *him*, because he didn't belong here. Didn't belong with you.

And he had smiled at their objections.

At you. At them.

You wish you could say they had moved first. Because Talbot's softer than anyone gives him credit for. Tamer. Sometimes you think that's your doing.

He's loud and he's colorful, but he's yours, and you would have been disappointed if he'd struck first. So, he hadn't.

But you had. 

At the first crude word, you'd launched yourself at them. The little reporter in their first fist fight. For Talbot.

The best of reasons, you think, as your breath finally catches up to you.

You hear a groan from behind you. A man's...Talbot's? But as you turn, he's still standing, obscured in the ugly alley light. He flexes his hand to wring the pain from it. Below, one of the men lies at his feet, jaw askew, one eye already swelling shut.

You open your mouth. "Are you --"

But he doesn't let you finish.

In a step, Talbot's hands are on your face, his forehead pressing to yours.

"You shouldn't have done that," even now, he smells of cloves and cinnamon, and it's with a dazed, sluggish thought that you remember he hadn't touched the first drop while you'd been at the bar. He doesn’t drink. Not these days. He says, "You're mad. Electric. Like lightening in the daytime."

You want to tell him he's full of shit. Anybody else and you would have.

He takes a breath. Ragged beneath his tattooed chest. "Don't fight for me."

"They --"

"Don't fight for me." He says again. He means it. His eyes are hard, even on you. They're so dark. They've no right to be blue.

"They deserved it." The argument feels weak. And immediately, you're angry you've said it.

"Not you," he says, "Not for me. Did they hurt you?"

"No." You don't think they had. Your adrenaline is still pumping, buzzing away in your ears to drown out even his voice.

"I -- " His lips press shut. Full. Beautiful as the rest of him.

You speak when he can’t. You say, "I wanted to look out for you. You don't need it, but..."

All at once, the ever-present pride bleeds out from Talbot's expression. It's only then that you see his nose is bloody. He'd taken a hit. Maybe a few. He’s taken them before. They’ve left him scarred where no one can see. Beneath the tattoos. Beneath the bluster. 

"I --" He says again. He makes it no further this time. It's several drawn breaths later, the warmth of him pressing closer as the noise from the wounded swells. "You're right. I didn't need it. But...you did it because you wanted to?"

He doesn’t know. It hurts you that after all this time that he’s unsure. Unconvinced. You might change your mind. He hopes you will. 

"Yes," you say.

Always because you want to. That's all that ever seems to matter to him. So, you say it again.

“Yes.”

He blinks. And then, he looks stricken. He looks like it’s finally clicked. You’ve drawn blood for him. The last thing he’d wanted.

And the only thing that mattered.

He’s so...beautiful. So much more than average. With a resolute nod, he says as much. "Then, that's all that matters.”

With little more than a click of his tongue, he releases his grip on your face. His hands move to pull at your coat -- his coat.

"Let us go? These...men --" No, you can already tell he doesn't like the term. "Cowards. They'll call the police."

One of them seems to have heard him. You try not to hold your breath when Talbot steps away. The blows that follow are brutal. Ugly. Uncivilized.

Like him. Sometimes. And sometimes not.

He joins you again, this time, his chest is heaving beneath the bloodied silk. His knuckles are split. They’ll need mending. You or Staci. You both love him, wretched as he is.

"I don't need you to fight for me." He takes your hand, the only indication that you're *more* to him. "But I'll love you for it, if you're so inclined? Only if."

You've never been in a fight before.

The thought seems new. The question uncertain.

The idea of coming to blows over someone. For someone. It, too, seems new.

You squeeze his hand. "I am."

"You don't think I'm...soft?"

"I think you're everything."

The dark in his eyes shines back at you. An abyss with a beautiful fall. He's no good. He's cruel and he's brutal and he's kind and he...

You swallow. You still don't know what he is. But he's yours.

As you are his.

For you, anon. Whoever you are. Thank you very much. Also, if you don’t mind, I’ll save the “pet names” part of your ask for something special?? I’ll update soon with that part of the response! 

[im-just-trying-to-survive-man]

ok so i feel like telling the world my bias list (kpop) for no reason and i was a little scared to but oh well lol

im gonna do this in parts. this list is my bias’ in boygroups pt.1

soo yeah if you wanna see some beautiful asian men you can keep reading lol

kinda turned out long oop

imma do nct on another post bc thats fucking loonngggg

1. kim hongjoong; stage name: hongjoong (leader of ateez, rapper, lyricist, producer and composer (i forget if those are the same thing) )

king of the lesbians

personally i think hes SOME type of gay but, y’know, you do you baby (’good lil boy’ is the song he wrote on their new album akjsdl)

prince of mullets in kpop (king is minghao from seventeen)

so?? pretty???

he paints his nails for the polished man campaign!!! (this was before the group became ambassadors.) v socially aware as well

his voice is very high for a rapper but i rly love it

wanna hear what he thinks of atinys?? (the fandom) listen to ‘aurora’

korean big minion 

very very good at english, despite what he says

is so caring for his ‘children’ ugh such an amazing leader

also a little brat sometimes but we dont talk about it

a MAN

fuck gender roles

5′7 skirt guy you’ve probably heard of in the kpop tiktok community

the official campaign pic:

2. han jisung; stage name: han (main rapper of stray kids, lead vocalist, producer and composer, lyricist, ult bias uwu)

heres the tea

this man literally saved my life

he has been through so much and i relate to that. seeing that he made it through the worst gave me hope.

his music and lyrics just speak to me (wanna see me cry? send me the song ‘19′, its written by him)

on to the happier things

his s q u i r r e l   c h e e k s

hes honestly so pleasing to look at ugh

vocals????? fricking great???? listen to ‘hellevator’ and ‘district 9′ for his vocals

jEoGiYa NoOnA HoKsI nAmJaChInGu IsSeOyO (’wow’ 3RACHA)

part of 3RACHA, a rap group between him and two other members

his american name is peter and he loves nat geo wild and cheesecakes and honestly if thats not amazing idk what is

lived in malaysia??? for 6 years???? lovin the melanin y’all

THE FUNNIIEST MAN ALIVE Y’ALL WAIT PLEASE WATCH THIS VIDEO IDK WHY BUT ITS SO FUNNY TO ME

3. im changkyun; stage name: I.M. (lead rapper of monsta x, sub-vocalist, maknae (the youngest), producer and composer)

fam im WHIPPED for this man like honestly i dont like subbing or sex in general lol ace things but i’d let him r a i l me

lived in america for 3 years and israel for 4; speaks fluent english and its SEXY

rapping skills??? on point???? both in english and korean ugh

LOOK AT HIM HIS DIMPLES AND HIS FACE AND UGH

is one of those people that does n o t like to be touched but then he’ll kiss your cheek out of nowhere

babie

VERY SOCIALLY AWARE LIKE HE SAID FUCK TOXIC MASCULINITY AND MISOGYNY 

confident in his own skin and super open about it

“For IM, ‘Wearing a harness is just to express our song concept. Showing the audience what we want to show is the most important thing. We’re not ashamed. We’ve done a lot of sexual items, like harnesses and chains. We’re comfortable.’ “ 

“But, for argument’s sake, where does your own sense of masculinity come from? IM pauses for a long moment. ‘Having a dick,’ he says bluntly, sipping coffee as his bandmates’ jaws drop and shocked laughter ripples around the table.”

that interview is here 

kinky lil bitch

i can go on and on about this man but im just gonna stop there

i lied he has tattoos (one on his wrist [ :): ] and the one on the nape of his neck, it reads “the one who wants to wear the crown must bear the crown”)

i like this picture bc its his hands and theyre pretty and fuck gender roles from a kpop idol

thats enough of him 

4. kim wonpil; stage name: wonpil (pianist, synthesizer, and keyboardist in day6, lyricist, vocalist, also a a dj and mc for a podcast)

Y’ALL LOOK AT HIM UGH

was the maknae but then dowoon came along and now hes not lol

Unbothered™

honestly like hes such a good pianist and is really great on the keys

is really good at making song lyrics out of thin air

like, he can hear the sentence “i really want chicken rn but i can’t have it im on a diet” and he’ll get “i crave your taste, but there is a wall i built myself blocking you from my love” like literally

im pretty sure he wrote the chorus for their song ‘zombie’

honestly bruh his vocals are so good

like pls go listen to ‘emergency’ and ‘congratulations’ (theres an english version for that song alsjdk)

guys hes just a big babie honestly

so pretty to look at omg

HES SO FUNNY AND HE DOESNT EVEN KNOW IT 

“i dont really care what my spouse looks like or what gender they are, as long as we’re happy and they love me” (wish i could find that photoset)

5. kim namjoon: stage name: RM (leader of bts, main rapper, sub-vocalist, lyricist, producer and composer)

literally the reason im into kpop, so thank you namjoon

a 5′11 babie, tbh

i remember finding out he had his own like, mixtape (’mono.’) and iT WAS SO GOOD AND IT STILL IS KAJHDJ

an amazing rapper and leader

can sing and i do not CARE what anyone says

so as you can see by now i kinda of have a type (except wonpil, idk wtf is going on there with me biasing him laksjk #no regrets)

anyway yeah he was the first kpop boy i found, and it was on his birthday

so every year on september 11th 11:50 p.m., i start i planting a tree in my backyard (bc then its on his birthday in america and korea lakajs so quirky i know) also bc its the day i started listening to kpop so its an anniversary for me lol. 

mOoNcHiLd

very very psychological

also very inspiring and loving (to the fans)

doesn’t really show affection, hes better with words than actions, and i really relate to that

dimples aGAIN

and last but not least for this list bc its already so frickin long

6. byun baekhyun; stage name: baekhyun (main dancer of exo, main singer, sub rapper, pianist, actor)

he’s so talented???? and amazing???? and overall just kinda perfect??????

AMAZING FUCKING VOCALS LIKE Y’ALL GO GO GO GO GOGOOG OG LISTEN TO HIS GROUPS SONG ‘ONE (MONSTER AND INFINITY)′ BECAUSE THAT SHIT SLAPS UGH

AND LIKE GROWL??? BRO????? MY VOCAL CORDS SNAPPED

dated another idol in the past but personally i think he’s a little *hand goes limp* if you know what i mean

my sister (4) calls him bacon he said it in an interview one time and it stuck to her

chesticles

MONSTER ERA UGH GOT ME DEAADDDD

is a solo artist too!!!!!!! go listen to his albums!!!! theyre really good!!!!

hes so frickin funny omg like i can laugh at with him all day

understands english but refuses to speak it

honestly kokobop baek was amazing idc what anyone says

is in like 3 different groups damn (like two of them are sub-units of his group and the other one is superm lol)

pls go watch the ‘men on a mission’ episodes with exo bc hes so fucking hilarious i will never get over it

a clown ass bitch that is always ready to square tf up a caring and v nice person that wont fight anyone ever

AN AMAZING ACTOR OMMGGGG BABIE GOT SKILLS

can also tapdance

lots of video games

very very very very very loud when playing video games

another man i endlessly love

well. if you made it this far, congrats!!! and thanks!!! i honestly dont care if no one sees this lol i just kinda wanted to do it, so, yeah lol. theres still more groups (superm, nct (seperate post), seventeen, vixx, pentagon, the rose, annnd oneus)then like idk if i’ll do a soloist one, so yeah. this kinda gives me something to do its one big infodump and im sorry lmao. yeah, love y’all !!!

[surveys-at-your-service]

Survey #248

“i was unprepared for fame, then everybody knew my name.”

Are you more positive or a debbie downer? I don't think I'm either, honestly. I'm realistic. How many meals do you eat a day? Since getting a calorie & macro counting app, I try to aim for three, but sometimes I only manage two. I have to be conscious of how I'm spacing out what I eat. If you could have any talent in the world what would it be? Be realistic. Draw exactly what I see in my head. Do you brush your tongue with your tooth brush? Bitch you better brush your goddamn tongue. I didn't know until I saw this as a survey question a while back that there were people who didn't. How many times do you brush your teeth a day honestly? Once. What are you favorite type of jeans? I don't wear jeans anymore, but aesthetically, dark, skinny, torn jeans. Do you pop your bones, crack your knuckles? NO it disgusts me omg. There's this girl who sits in front of me in Women Writers class who cracks her back ALL the time and I have to fight cringing so, so hard. Do you eat your nails? YO NO. I may peel my nails when they get long (to me, anyway) but who the fuck eats their nails. Do you eat the ice in your drink? If it's that good cronchy type, fuck yeah. What do you order at Chic-Fil-A? I used to just get the classic sandwich and fries, but I stopped going there forever ago due to their connection to anti-LGBTQ organizations. By now I can't even stomach the thought of eating something from there. Damn are their sandwiches good, but I'm not giving them business. If you had to go to Mcdonalds what do you order? "Had to" lmao. I have no problem with McDonald's, honestly; you couldn't make me go, because I'd be quite willing. I love their cheeseburgers and, of course, their fries. But because I'm a fatass I have to at least get a double cheeseburger. Have you ever been addicted to cigarettes? No. Which do you use more? Facebook or Instagram? Facebook. Are you a student? If so, what classes will you take next? Yes. "Next," I don't know, considering I haven't chosen classes for next year. Currently I take Painting, Women Writers, Psychology, and Biology. Are you a good kisser? I don't know? How many real bf/gf have you had? Two. Did you enjoy your past relationships? Sure, save for the one with Tyler. That was pointless as shit. Would you ever get back with your ex? Sara, if certain conditions were right. Jason, I honestly don't know and hope I'm never put into the position to need to decide. Other exes, no. Do you like 80’s music? Rock and metal, absolutely. It was a great decade for the genres. Name a comedy that you like. Rush Hour 2 popped to mind first because we mentioned it in school yesterday. Do you like homework? ??????????? WHAT IS THIS QUESTION???????????????? NO??????????????? Something you want to buy real bad? Ugggghhhhh a lot. Being unemployed is a BLAST!!!!!!!!!! Something you would buy a friend as a gift? It depends on the person, of course. I try really hard to give very personal gifts, so what it would be would greatly vary. What is something that would be a good birthday gift for you? Donate Big Bucks to my tattoo fund and I'll give you smooches. Something you would gift yourself? Still tattoos lmfao. Favorite candle scent? Cinnamon rolls mmmmmmmmm. Do you watch beauty videos on YouTube? So here's the tea I genuinely love Jeffree Star and I'm digging NikkieTutorials lately LOOK idk I guess because I find makeup to be an art, I like watching that stuff. My YouTube interests have become seriously diverse lately. Have you ever questioned your sexuality? Ha ha obviously. What is the best thing about life? Man, that's a loaded question. I suppose having people in it that make it worthwhile and a true privilege to simply be here. What do you think will happen when you die? YO, HONESTLY, I don't know, man. I've even questioned reincarnation lately. I 100% believe we are not hollow bodies meant to just decay after death, but creatures with spirits that live on in SOME form or way afterwards. I don't believe in the concept of a "Hell," but I don't really think I accept there being a true "Heaven," either? I think there's just... something. What, I don't know, but guess I'll figure it out at some point. Are you superstitious? No. What kind of surveys do you like the most? Random ones, especially the ones that make you think. Do you go to church? No. Do you like Christian music? No. I get frustrated from just bad memories/associations. Have you ever skateboarded and failed at it? Never really tried. What show/concert have you went to that you didn’t like much? N/A Is sex a must in your life? Nah. Could you wait until marriage for sex? Lol I was the abstinent one years ago, so obviously I could, because I understand it. What do you think about weed? Medically, it's fantastic. Too much evidence of it being so to argue it anymore. For other use, I feel the same way about it as I do cigarettes: bad idea, but whatever. I personally don't care if it's made legal for recreational use or not, so long as it's treated similarly to alcohol, ex. illegal to drive while high. If you found a baby turtle on the side of the road, would you pick it up and keep it? With it being a baby, I'd probably take it to an animal rescue or something. Did you and your mum ever have a big fight that caused you to move out? I stayed at Dad's for a handful of days. Has the last person you kissed ever been to your house? Yes. Does anybody have a tattoo with your name on it? My sister has my initial, anyway. Who did you last see shirtless? My mom. Do you like to make the first move? NONONONONO I'M SHY. Do you think you will ever be married? Probably. If the last person you kissed saw you kissing someone else, would they be mad? I don't think she'd be mad, no. Do you understand football? Nope. Who last called you beautiful? Probably Mom. If you fell pregnant to the last person you kissed, what would you think? We're both female so like- Do you think the body is the most beautiful thing that was ever made? No. Name five things you did today? Stayed at the hospital for my beautiful niece to be born :'), slept far too little after getting home, and that's... kinda it. What kind of phone do you have? It's literally a Tracfone, BUT WAIT! I actually wanted it, ha ha. Mom has one and it is *genuinely* a good phone, so I got one for my birthday. Hell, it's cheaper than paying monthly, so I'm fine with it. When was the last time you talked to one of your siblings? 5 in the morning when we were all still with Ashley. Do you like fire? Sure, I like watching it. Have you ever been to a spa? Noooo, not my jam. Do you know how to do a cartwheel? No. Who’s the funniest drunk person you know? Ehhhhh. When he drank, my dad was either hilarious when drunk or hateful and short-fused as fuck. 50/50 shot. But yeah, if you got Version 1, he'd crack anyone the hell up. Now that he's sober and happy he's always like that. What would you do if your partner still kept pictures of their ex? Well, I'd say it depends on the picture's context. Like, a picture of you two kissing, then I'd be uncomfortable as shit. If you have prom pictures or stuff like that but don't like go looking through them regularly, idc. It was a special event. What if your partner went through your cellphone? BYE, CUNT. What if your partner was flirting with another girl/boy? BYE, CUNT. Is there really a difference between Coke and Pepsi? YES. I can absolutely taste it. Pepsi sucks. Are there any mistakes with your recent ex you wish you could have changed? Stupid and/or impulsive shit I'd said, sure, but for the most part, no. We had a good relationship. Has anyone ever been with you while you were throwing up? My mom always is if she's present. I am terrified of vomiting and even at my age still want her there, even though she can't do anything, obviously. I turn into a baby when I'm about to throw up. Background on your computer? My favorite picture of Teddy. Who has hurt you the most? Jason. Or hell, my own head, idk. Are you happy with where you are relationship-wise now? Sure. What language do you want to learn? I wanna be fluent in German. Who’s the last person that came to your house? A family friend. Is there anyone you would like to fight? God no. I'm not a fighter. Who did you dance with last? Sara. Who is your best friend(s)? Sara. Song playing? "It's A Raid" by Ozzy feat. Post Malone. The album's out T O D A Y , B O Y S. Who is your arch-enemy? I don't have one. What's the most attractive thing on the opposite sex? GODDAMN shoulderBLADES Do you want platinum or gold for your wedding band? Not normal gold, I know. Rose gold is my ideal one, but I really don't care much. Have you ever paid to have your eyebrows waxed? I mean my mom has, seeing as I didn't have an income then, either. Got that done regularly in high school. Not because I asked, but because it was just "normal" since my two sisters did it, too. Do you think that the tobacco companies should pay for people’s medical bills? No, it's not their choice to use the product. Sure, they're making it, but it's really too late to cease production of tobacco. It'd be catastrophic in terms of the job industry. Do you curse in average conversations? Yes; I have to actually make an effort to not curse if needed. Have you ever bought a shot glass? No. Do you have a therapist? Not anymore after my previous one that I loved and trusted gave me every reason to break her jaw. I kind of want another one, but also don't. I'm supposed to, considering my history and that I'm on a lot of medication, but I just do nooooot want to go through the whole trust process again. Do you ever fall for spam mail? No. What color do you wear the most? Black. Do you only eat cough drops because you like the taste? No. Have your parents ever walked in on you having sex? No. Do you like getting stoned? I've never been so and aren't interested in ever getting there. Have you ever gotten a bloody nose from snorting cocaine? YOIKES THAT ESCALATED QUICKLY lol no, I wouldn't touch coke with a ten-foot pole. Red, white, yellow, or pink roses? Pink. What’s the worst name your mom has ever called you? I don't know. She hasn't called me anything too awful that I know of. Have you ever done acid? No. Were you at a rave? Never been, definitely not my scene. Do you post pictures where you look good but your friends look bad? Well, I don't hang out with like... anyone, so, lmao. But I wouldn't. Are you friends with any of your exes? Yes. Would you ever dye your hair pink? ACTUALLY! Pastel pink is on my list. I tested some soft colors out in Photoshop on me and it actually looked really cute. I think I wanna be a smaller size first, though. Do you ever masturbate? I haven't since I came off that godawful birth control that drove me batshit insane in terms of libido. I still don't think it's a bad thing, my interest in that is just, gone. Are you embarrassed about your sex life or lack there of? No. Who’s the last person you said I love you to? My sister. Did you like your life when you were in middle school? Actually fuck middle school with a maul. If you went on American Idol, do you think you’d go through to Hollywood? Nope. Have you ever received an anonymous gift? No, I don't think so. What kind of laugh do you have? A loud and obnoxious one. Do you hoard anything? "Hoard" isn't the right word, no. Are you afraid of flying? I am, but I feel it's only a realistic apprehension. Especially going back and forth to Sara's a few times, you kinda have to get used to it. Most recent Facebook ‘like’? Shit man idk, I "like" a load of stuff. Have you ever camped out somewhere for an event the next day? No. Do you do anything regularly that could damage your body? Can someone please eliminate soda from the face of the earth???? What do you love most in the world? Those closest to me. What woke you up this morning? Ugh, the sun. I need to put my curtain back up after Roman tore it down. Who was the last person you rode in a car with? My mom. Is anything bothering you? There's always *something* bothering me to some degree, but nothing seriously at the moment. Are you in a good mood? My niece was born overnight and is gorgeous and healthy so I have to be. :') When were you the saddest in your life? 2016. Do you own more than one cell phone? Ha ha, I have two old ones. One I used for pictures because the camera was good, and the most recent old one, I just need to get some pictures and contacts from... but I'm lazy. Have you ever had a song written about you? No. What songs make you happy? Depends on what I'm feeling. Next concert? No clue now that Ozzy had to cancel his, bless his old heart. As a child, did you ever get the chance to go to Disney World/Disneyland? Yes. When was the last time you fought with your significant other, if any? I’m single. Do you know anyone, personally, who is in an abusive relationship? Are you? No, thankfully. When was the last time you were on a boat? Where did you travel on it? Not since I went fishing with my old best friend a few years back. We were just in a pond. Are you planning on going anywhere with someone, some time today? Probably not. Do you like cereal? What would you consider your favorite kind of cereal? Hell yeah. Cinnamon Toast Crunch is *maybe* my favorite? Idk, I like a lot. Are there any people you don’t like for your significant other/crush to talk to? This doesn't apply to me, but even if I had one, they're not my damn child. I'm not gonna police whom they talk to. I mean I guess there are exceptions, like, talking to a drug dealer to name one, but talking to most people, that's their business. Just don't hide it from me. Have you ever forgotten your birthday? Did you soon figure it out? No. What color are the curtains in your room if you have any at the moment? Maroon. Is there anyone you are currently trying to get out of trouble? Why? No. Have you ever wanted your significant other to get rid of a friend? Well, calling back to that other question, there was one in a previous relationship that I really couldn't stand, but it wound up working out. If you have siblings, have they moved out or do they still live with you? It's just me and Ma now. Do you ever go to Blockbuster? How frequently would you say you go? WHAT A CALLBACK!!!!! Omg did I love BB. Went like every weekend to rent a game, and sometimes we'd go there Fridays before a sleepover to grab a movie. Do you ever listen to music so you can actually change your emotion? Sure, sometimes.

[rolandovieraofficial]

A letter to my soulmate:

Hey, im sure i have called you my soulmate more than a million times. And you might ask yourself how do i know this? Well.

You have a personality thats strong, willed, capable of anything, brave. You also have a heart of gold, you might not talk about it alot or open up your emotions like my soft self does. But you have such a sweet delicate heart. You love with such passion, you care so immaculately. You worry about me, you think about me. You make me happy just with the fact you exist. We have gone through the bad and the good to achieve this love. And we weren’t even looking for love when we found each other. And thats just a fraction of why i call you my soulmate.

Why are am i so blindly in love?

Well, many things. I have never had someone pay attention to me down to how i like my olives and my pant size. You truly pay so much attention to me, you always had in mind the little things i like, you always understand me, you help me through my bad moments, you are there when im not doing good, you always know what to say to me, you respect me, you even care for me now, the fact you have the strength to tell me its not time or the fact you dont lead me on and you say it all how it is, makes me respect you and love you so much more. Also you are beautiful to me, i cannot stress the many times youd see me and id just melt with your look, your eyes, your smile, all your tattoos your body. And when the red lipstick is on, wow i die. You always find an accessory to add to yourself and you always suprise me with it, or the random urges of a tattoo, or the dresses to special occasions that always end up on the floor or off when we get back in the room. Your skin is so delicate so soft, your smell is always pleasant and addictive, when i kiss your lips your neck ur back anything on you the taste is sinfully good. Your style is so beautiful to me, how u rock ur low chucks cuz of how i rocked em in hs, we love vans and ripped jeans, also any big shirt or sweater that’s comfortable we love. Your bracelets your gold chains, your rings and all of ur piercings, little things that just make you stand out, you’re so special and gorgeous. You’re so perfect my eyes will never desire someone else, soy tuyo de por vida. And thats some of the reasons why im so blindly in love with you.

Why dont i move on or forget?

Well this one is easy to answer, i dont move on simply because you have become this person in my life whom i would do absolutely anything for, and who I literally every single day i try to reach and get to. You’re my ultimate goal, you’re my dream, you’re my biggest wish, you’re the love of my life, you’re my true love, you’re everything ive ever wanted and more. The thought of moving on doesn’t remotely cross my mind. All i think of is you, ao how will i forget? If all i do is remember you, wonder about you, think of our memories, think of ways to improve and be a better man for you, think of how no one will ever be like you, thinking how theres a girl out there with the name of Rox that loves me back. Youre it for me Rox. Idc about anyone else, idc for someone new, for new sex, i dont care. I told you this, after you. Im never loving anyone again. You have my heart Rox you is all i want to love and care for. You always give me new experiences, you always show me something new about yourself. You’re vast, you’re an amazing work of art im always admiring and getting to know. You’re everything rox. You’re my baby. So no i am not moving on nor will i forget about you.

My goals?

My goal is you, there’s something that more important to me than anything and thats you. Why? This life is full of money, material things, and all these “riches” that are nothing but temporary. Your love, thats endless, you are timeless, you are forever. You enrich me and fill my soul with the happiness and love that nothing in this whole wide universe will ever even come close to. The permanent thought of someone loving you and being there no matter the situation, is just more meaningful than anything else. My triumph is your happiness, i want to make you feel happy, loved, wanted, i want you to be yourself and enjoy life. I wanna be the man that gives you a family, a whole experience that just makes us last life together, i want you to always see me the same, to look at me and smile, and say wow. To when we have sex you just love it as much as the many times we have it. That car rides and dates all feel magical and pretty like the first. I want you for life and thats my goal. My goal is you, your happiness, and your love.

This is a letter just to let you know why you’re my soulmate, i could write a book on this topic. I just want you to know whats in my mind, and how i view you and i think of you. Hopefully whenever you feel sad or alone you can read this or even reach out to me, because i truly love you. And hopefully one day you can be mine again. Im here for you always. And im always gonna be thinking about you. Tuyo X100pre

-Rol

[substantialshordy]

i want to... no i NEED to act like you don't exist. like we didn't ever happen. u are not real. not even a fever dream, a nightmare or message sent to warn or guide me. i don't know who u are. and i don't feel right saying; i want the worst to fucking happen to u. if karma doesn't hit urself personally i NEEED it to hit the people u care about most. whether it be ur mom, brother, sister, best fucking friends, aunts and uncles, ur fucking new loves idc karma needs to destroy u from the root. and this is coming from the darkest parts of me. bc for the longest i wished u nothing but good/happiness and love.. even after u scream "FUCK YOU" and u took that and me for granted. i hope it all catches up w u and u drown in ur own sorrows. i hope it makes u feel like the worthless piece of shit that u are. i would give anything to see u in the same low ass fucking state u brought me to. u deserve wosre. future greatness, character development, future children u could have (god bless the woman that has them), the woman u decide to reside w, ur job, and u as an insignificant man, live w the lowest parts of the things u produced and accept it as ur life. i need u to crumble at the thought of the things u could've done better w me and the other girls. bc its all a reflection of what comes from ur decisions. and even before me u weren't making the greatess ones. it all has to do with ur insecurities and self awareness. u stroke ur ego with the love bombing, manipulation and pride. u are more than pathetic. it was never love between us. love lasts, u managed to turn everything i have had, every miligram of love i had for u, into hate. i would've tattooed ur name onto me and sadly carried ur children. be safe to the greatest/most chaotic/heartfelt/genuine love i have ever felt in my 24 yrs of living. u changed every prospect and concept of love for the worst. i hope and pray u r unwell and remember me always. i hope ur fam asks about me <3

[nylenol]

ALL OF THEM. 1-50. GO.

1: Do you ever wish you were someone else?

yes and no! i value the idea of fate a Lot a lot and idk i believe things happen to certain ppl for a certain reason whether in this life or others so. yeah. i also think that everything i’ve been thru makes me a certain way, and throwing that away to go like,,, possess another body or some shit makes everything not worth. i wish i had better financial status and had more resources at my disposal tho! so if i could change my social/financial standing thatd be hot as fuck

2: What is your full name?sandra whot (thats what i write on my physics tests)

3: How old are you and how old do you get mistaken for?im 17 but god knows i still look 12

4: Have you ever dyed your hair?no but ppl ask me if i’ve dyed it bc the natural colors kinda wack! also i spray painted it blue once does that count

5: What’s your eye color?healthy soil mmm wormy

6: Your opinion about your body and how comfortable you are with iti like my body! i used to not bc shes a little chonky but its okay now^^

7: Do you have any tattoos or piercings?i really wanna get an industrial/helix piercing in my ear but im scared of piercings djhgggg i used to have those little asian baby hoops that all asian babies have but it got caught in my necklace and started bleeding like fuck when i was little so i was kinda traumatized, dont wear earrings anymore and the hole closed up on one side ; as for tattoos i want one eventually! maybe something small and meaningful on my ankle/wrist or smth

8: What would you say is your best quality?i’m really tolerant of a lotta bs tbh; a lot of times when my friends cant handle a person/situation i still find myself p okay with it and they tell me that so ya!

9: What are you really bad at?oh my god so many : cant dance; cant sing; drawing mediocre; meeting deadlines? whos she! etc etc my work ethic just sux

10: What talent do you wish you had?i wish i could sing well/play an instrument!! love live renewed my love for music a lot and not being able to express that love for music IN music makes me rlly emo

11: Are you nice to everyone?yeah i’d like to think so,, sometimes i shittalk if they like do something Genuinely Morally Wrong like hello but for the most part i think everyones deserving of kindness even if i dont know them that well!

12: What do you think about the most?i spend a lot of time thinking abt the past and what i could have changed and the future and what i could have been and its ugly dont like it but it nags at me!! thanks obama

13: Things you like/dislike about yourselfi like the fact that i have a lot of passion for certain things and dedicate myself to them!! but i dont like the fact that i get demotivated rlly easy and let things pile up after signing up for too many things that i care about; ; ;  then i dont drop these things and end up in a shithole of responsibility like hello o o o o 

14: What is your least favorite word?i dunno! but any word i cant pronounce correctly is my mortal enemy (colosseum)

15: What is your favorite word?idk but i say hello so much ,, about time i start punctuating my sentences with goodbye.

16: Are you more like your mom or your dad?i look exactly like my dad but i like my mom more! i wanna be like her, that woman works so hard to keep me and my sister alive hello

17: Would you ever smile at a stranger?yeah! but honest to god if the strangers a crusty man then no i aint risking shit

18: A reason you’ve lied to someoneuhh the other day i went out for dim sum w benji and told my mom that only BENJI was buying dim sum but actually he paid for both of us bc im a broke bih (my mom hates owing ppl money) and yeah i feel terrible i dont lie often

19: Are you lying about anything right now?i dont think so ? only person im lying to is myself kek - John 1:14

20: Have you kissed someone older than you?never kissed anyone ! but wheres my milf @ god

21: Do you believe in love at first sight?yes in a way ??? but i think thats a superficial, physical kind of love and the love that matters can only form after like. years of both platonic and romantic bonding

22: Do you believe in soulmates?yes! the definition of a soulmate to me is someone who would fit best for you both romantically and platonically - but while there will always be someone who fits the best, there will always be someone who fits about the same, and someone who fits about the same right under that, etc etc. while we dont end up w/ the OG Soulmate tm in most situations, we do find a variation of them somewhere in the world.

23: Are looks important?a little bit?? but it doesnt matter in the long run, if you love someone then you’ll also grow to love the way they look its a package deal brent

24: Opinion on relationship age differencesi like ppl around my age or maybe a year younger/older but if ur 25 n dating a 35 yo then thats ur business! idc as long as neither party is in their teens and its healthy

25: Would you date someone off the Internet?unless i met them irl? no

26: Have you ever cried over a boy/girl?lol yeah in part, i normally dont cry until i have 6000 different reasons to cry and sufficient hydration (like 3 times a year hello)

27: Have you ever wanted someone you couldn’t have?lol

28: Anyone you’re giving up on right now?lol

29: Have you ever liked someone who your friends hated?yeah! my friends disliked one of my best friends for like a Long time, me n her aren’t close friends anymore bc shes kinda snakey but w/e

30: Have you ever liked your best friend?lol

31: How does someone win your heart?be a good friend! same humor helps a lot, if someone’s aura is comfy for me to be in then hhhello ;; also genuine concern and compassion is my biggest turn on yeet

32: What turns you on?having enough food on me to eat every single period of the day, fruit, vidya games, sleeping,,, when teachers extend deadlines mr. geil i love you ? i lo

33: What turns you off?ketchup poured over fries like hello what is wrong with people.

34: Do you get jealous easily?yes cerritos auto square

35: What is your definition of cheating?cheating (noun) - the conscious pursuit of non-platonic relations with a person other than your significant other

36: Do you forgive betrayal?not really but depends on the situation

37: Have you ever been cheated on?nop i gave someone my hw to copy a few times tho

38: Have you ever cheated on someone?nop but i copy other ppls hw on a daily basis :)

39: How often do you listen to music?24/7 all the time always every waking hour right now immediately at the moment, this bitch DEAD without her earbuds

40: First concert you attendedactual actual concert in a venue was the AX one where Aqours performed!!

41: Last movie you watchedCarol it made me sososoos emo i was watching it on a bus next to a bunch of hetties i was Crying. crying

42: Favorite type of movieromance! and for some reason disaster movies,,, also psychological movies r Really up there

43: Is there something that happened in your past that you hate talking about?hoohooheehee

44: Are you good at hiding your feelings?yeah when i need to, its obvious to other ppl tho i think

45: Do you fall in love easily?not really

46: Do you think people say I love you too much?yes and no, it depends on context and frequency

47: What’s your favorite holiday?tet bih

48: Are you a forgiving person? Do you like being that way?im pretty forgiving i think, i wish i wasnt

49: Where’s the most magical place on earth?right here in my bed! wish i could sleep forever

50: What’s your “type”?idk if i have a type but ppl are hot and this lesbian is too weak to go on! i like ppl who are kinda similar to me tho: little crazy little wack but ultimately well meaning

[glisteria]

all of the nsfw asks pls ?

(lowkey doin it bc u asked even tho i wanna do it anyways)

1. Are looks important in a relationship?•In my personal opinion? No. If you focus truly on the outside you may never find someone you connect with that is pretty too yknow? If that makes sense??

2. Are relationships ever worth it?• Of course

3. Are you a virgin?•No

4. Are you in a relationship?•God i wish i was

5. Are you in love?•Wouldnt classify it as love? but maybe

6. Are you single this year?• Uhhh for the most part

7. Can you commit to one person?• Yes

8. Describe your crush•Well you see im weird and like boy a guy AND a girl so ill give u 2 description? The guy is loud and stupidly funny and is a dweeb. The girl is cute asf and very smart and talented plus i keep circling back to acting like a school girl over her so 👀

9. Describe your perfect mate• Someone i can talk with. Make jokes and be comfortable around. Someone who understands my weird mood shifts or try’s to understand

10. Do you believe in love at first sight?• Maybe

11. Do you ever want to get married?•Depends ask me in 10 or so years

12. Do you forgive betrayal?•Depends on how bad it was

13. Do you get jealous easily?•Honestly situational but sometimes yes

14. Do you have a crush on anyone?•Ya yeet

15. Do you have any piercings?•Oh dude ya i have 3 per ear and would like more

16. Do you have any tattoos?•Cat on my inner right ankle (want more tho)

17. Do you like kissing in public?•Yes

20. Do you shower every day?•Try to but #depression

21. Do you think someone has feelings for you?•Haha i thought so but then he decided he didnt wanna be around me :)

22. Do you think someone is thinking about you right now?•Hope so. maybe not im a dISASTER

23. Do you think you can last in a relationship for 6 months and not cheat?• Yes

24. Do you think you’ll be married in 5 years?• 🤷🏻‍♀️

25. Do you want to be in a relationship this year?• Plz

26. Has anyone told you they don’t want to ever lose you?• Yes

27. Has someone ever written a song or poem for you?• No but i for them

28. Have you ever been cheated on?• No

29. Have you ever cheated on someone?•No but i was ‘the other girl once’ and i regret

30. Have you ever considered plastic surgery? If so, what would you change about your body?•Idk smth about my stomach? Breast reduction

31. Have you ever cried over a guy/girl?•Oh yea all the time

32. Have you ever experienced unrequited love?• HA yes

33. Have you ever had sex with a man?•Yes

34. Have you ever had sex with a woman?•Not technically

35. Have you ever kissed someone older than you?• 👀 yes

36. Have you ever liked one of your best friends?• Oh yes the cliché friends to lovers trope. Yes ive fallen for friends

37. Have you ever liked someone who your friends hated?• OH YES

38. Have you ever liked someone you didn’t expect to?• 👀 Sophomore year looking @ u

39. Have you ever wanted someone you couldn’t have?• Do idols count

40. Have you ever written a song or poem for someone?• Ya

41. Have you had sex so far this year?• HA in a dream yea

42. How long can you just kiss until your hands start to wander?• Depends on the persons preferences

43. How long was your longest relationship?•6 months

44. How many boyfriends/girlfriends have you had?• I dunno 6?

45. How many people did you kiss in 2012/2013?• Considering i was 13/14 from what i can remember not many

46. How many times did you have sex last year?• 0

47. How old are you?• 18

48. If the person you like says they like someone else, what would you say?•Id support them because the heart wants what it wants

49. If you have a boyfriend/girlfriend, what is your favorite thing about him/her?• Physically probably their eyes and hands

50. If your first true love knocked on your door with apology and presents, would you accept?•No absolutely not

51. Is there a boy/girl who you would do absolutely everything for?•Yes multiple

52. Is there anyone you’ve given up on? Why?• Yes and because i cared too much and he cared not at all

53. Is there someone mad because you’re dating/talking to the person you are?• I have friends who dont like my other friends if that counts

54. Is there someone you will never forget?• Of couese

55. Share a relationship story.• Haha i dunno. Most are bad

56. State 8 facts about your body• I have a tattoo. I have horrible acne. My right ankle cracks if i bend it. I have a random hard spot on my right leg. I have a large belly. I have a freckle on the outside of my right hand. 3 holes in each ear. I have large brown eyes

57. Things you want to say to an ex• Please stop toying with my even though you are out of my life

58. What are five ways to win your heart?• Be kind to me. Dont pressure me into anything and let me be the way i am. Plz dont make fun of my obsession with kpop or certain games. Food? Literally just like me. Bam you got me

59. What do you look like? (Post a picture!)• HNNNNN ill send (the asker) a selfie

60. What is the biggest age difference between you and any of your partners?• 2 years

61. What is the first thing you notice in someone?• Personality wise probably sense of humor and physically eyes and hands bc dont talk to me i love em

62. What is the sexiest thing someone could ever do for/to you?• Like me?

63. What is your definition of “having sex”?• Situational imo

64. What is your definition of cheating?• Romantic/Sexual advances or actions with someone that isnt your partner without exolicit permission

65. What is your favourite foreplay routine?• Idk kiss me and let’s figure it out

66. What is your favourite roleplay?• Not gonna out myself

67. What is your idea of the perfect date?• Listen to music and talk

68. What is your sexual orientation?• Idk? I like someone for who they are not what they are

69. What turns you off?• I dunno honestly been too long

70. What turns you on?• haha not gonna out myself too much but uhh anything on my neck/behind my ears. Praise like fuck

71. What was your kinkiest wet dream?• Never had a wet dream :)

72. What words do you like to hear during sex?• My name honestly

73. What’s something sweet you’d like someone to do for you?• Idk. Write something about me on their page? Tag me in smth nice? hug me? come to ohio and socialize with me? (come see the nutcracker and phantom of the opera with me this month plz plz)

74. What’s the most superficial characteristic you look for?• Idk

75. What’s the sweetest thing anyone’s ever done for you?• I honestly dont know?

76. What’s the sweetest thing you’ve ever done for someone?• I dunno. Wrote a song to make them feel better? Sent them a whole care package when they were depressed? idk

77. What’s your opinion on age differences in relationships?• As long as its legal idc

78. What’s your dirtiest secret?• O boyo if you wanna know you gotta dm me

79. When was the last time you felt jealous? Why?• Literally any time my friends do something without me or with a new friend

80. When was the last time you told someone you loved them?• Other than friendly and parents probably about a month? i just masked it as friendly?

81. Who are five people you find attractive?•The Person who asked this 👀•Literally all my kpop boys• uhh

82. Who is the last person you hugged?•My dad

83. Who was your first kiss with?• His name was John

84. Why did your last relationship fail?• He decided his ex who was manipulative was better than me

85. Would you ever date someone off of the Internet?• Yes. I actually have

[nc-ty]

Ultimate Bias Tag

I was tagged by @hydranoel (thank you!!💕 i’m really excited to do this tag wooo)

Rules: answer the following questions about your top 3 ultimate biases and then tag 5 people.

the questions below are for each of the biases…

(i thought this would be short but no, i hope you’re prepared)

1. who are your 3 ultimate biases? (any group)

lee taeyong, kim hanbin and kim taehyung (i’m assuming any group can mean from different groups?? i’m gonna do it like this anyway because idk who my top 3 biases are in nct..)

2. when did you first see your bias? *list all three*

taeyong - the fire truck dance practice (i always watch dance practices for a group first lol) in september/october maybe

hanbin - rhythm ta dance practice ages ago but i didn’t get into ikon until recently so i only really saw him in the bling bling mv when it came out

taehyung - dope mv when they featured it on youtubers react to kpop on the finebros haaha, i think early last year

3. was he/her your first bias? *all three*

taeyong - ye i remember thinking ‘the one in the orange sleeves is cool’ (he is cool)

hanbin - no, it was jinhwan for the first while because he’s the cutest

taehyung - yep always and forever

4. your favorite thing about your bias?

taeyong - asjodghawcf this is hard, i love the way he dances, and i also love the way his onstage persona is so different to his actual personality.. he’s so sweet idk, he’s such a caring leader and it breaks my heart that people misunderstand him also i lowkey love his kinky lyrics and if none of you are willing to whip his ass then i will do it happily #stopkinkshamingleetaeyong

hanbin - again the way he dances is👌👌👌👌 i’m so in awe of him as a human in general?? i love watching him doing leadery stuff because he’s amazing at it aaaAAAH but the fact that he is simultaneously a genius and also v dumb is probably my fave thing (plus serious and goofy too, he’s the definition of “get you a guy who can do both”) anD AND ALSO HIS NIHILISM TATTOO

taehyung - he just makes me smile all the time like he’s an angel!! every time he smiles i smile, he just makes me happy ahh (also his voice wow, especially when he sings in his deep voice😍 sometimes it really gives me chills) plus the way he is with kids makes me emotional

5. what do they specialize in?

taeyong - rap, and dance i guess? also leadership and visuals x1000

hanbin - what doesn’t this guy specialise in tbh

taehyung - vocals and being a fashion icon 

6. what group are they from?

taeyong is from nct, hanbin is from ikon and taehyung is from bts

7. zodiac sign?

taeyong - cancer, hanbin - libra/scorpio cusp and taehyung - capricorn

(i just spent like 20 minutes reading about the signs and my compatibility with various signs help)

8. favorite picture / gif and why? 

lmao the question is singular oops 

taeyong - i have over 500 photos of him saved on my phone so idk how i’m gonna do this ahahah (one day i’m gonna make one of those long ass posts with just loads of gifs of taeyong) 

 http://taeyongdata.tumblr.com/post/157653550174/angelic-do-not-edit-1#  (i just did a link because it’s fantaken and i’m p sure i’m not meant to repost so hopefully the link works lol (i spent 40 minutes looking so the link better fking work))

so sparkly 

is this too many, idk and idc

hanbin - i’m honestly swerving for him so hard (taeyong better watch out) like i just lvoe him so much idk it’s a bit weird i’m concerned for myself 

not sure why a grown man throwing a small tantrum is attractive to me but apparently i’m living for it 

okay sorry that’s enough (please help me)

taehyung - i am so soft for him, i have been for so long now and i can’t imagine that ever changing

i mean woah

sorry that’s irrelevant but i found it and i just wanted to share it with you, i hope you all republish it. support johnny seo.

anyway 

look he’s an angel ok

9. why do you love them?

umm how do i even answer this? i just do idk (i guess i sort of answered this in the ‘favourite thing’ question because i wrote paragraphs instead of just answering the question like a normal person) they’re all wonderful and so talented and i can’t believe that they actually exist??

i’m tagging @jeno-jeyes @cherry-ten @lemmetalkaboutkpop @griffinrunes @reikojinxx @yongguksgummysmile @couleurdetoiles @jongdaesarethebestdays @day21-97 @artaehyung @dorkyungsoe @mad-ncity @baeked-kookie @jaehyunscult anddd @jungsjaehyn 💞

sorry i got carried away with the gifs oops, and sorry if you didn’t want to be tagged!! i just loved doing this and i figured most people would enjoy talking about their biases so i thought it would be nice to tag a load of people :)) you don’t have to do it if you don’t want to!

i understand if you want to block me after being subjected to this horrendously long post

[wisehowell]

just a lot of questions

got tagged by @teatowelhowell to answer these 92 questions- that’s a lot, btw THE LAST 1. Drink: water 2. Phone Call: one of my best friends to rant about something 3. Text Message: hm oh on sc i was ranting about bts to another best friend 4. Song You Listened To: let’s open spotfiy... coming home by tuen/anki. oh that’s a good song. i don’t think anyone knows it exists, but 5. Time You Cried: heh like i remember i probably hit my toe against something HAVE YOU EVER 6. Dated Someone Twice: lol single life (my parents no let me anyway) 7. Been Cheated On: heh 8. Kissed Someone And Regretted It: heh 9. Lost Someone Special: my grandma :( also three best friends bc we went to different high schools and it was too hard to stay together 10. Been Depressed: uhm no i’m too confident it’s kinda insane but yea 11. Gotten Drunk and Thrown Up: yep, at age fifteen. (altho i’m like 19ish days away from sixteen) LIST 3 FAVORITE COLORS 12. teal, green with a hint of blue. not aqua, which is blue with a hint of green. 13. silver (especially if it shimmers) 14. a rich blue IN THE LAST YEAR HAVE YOU 15. Made New Friends: of course! i made about thirty, idk. but i love em all. some graduated high school tho so now i’m sad 16. Fallen Out of Love: what is love 17. Laughed Until You Cried: duhhh 18. Found Out Someone Was Talking About You: nah i’m that “smart, cute girl that’s too loud and follows every rule ever” according to my friends we got no drama 19. Met Someone Who Changed You: my four best friends 20. Found Out Who Your True Friends Are: mhm. for now. but college... 21. Kissed Someone On Your Facebook: do you mean ig or sc bc fb is dead 22. How Many of Your Facebook Friends Do You Know in Real Life: like i have fb no it’s for old people like my parents 23. Do You Have Any Pets: a hermit crab named digger! nickname- diggles 24. Do You Want To Change Your Name: well my name is annoying bc ‘phoebe’ is never in any gift shops and people (guy friends mostly) say it wrong on purpose or spell it wrong. people i’ve known for years spell my name wrong- pheobe. i’d change it to idk what something cool like olivia or kat. 25. What Did You Do For Your Last Birthday: that was a year ago jeez but i think i went to a waterpark 26. What Time Did You Wake Up: 7, altho today was a rarity usually it’s 8ish 27. What Were You Doing at Midnight Last Night: tumblr and anime and sc 28. Name Something You Cannot Wait For: taylor swift’s new album. yes i’m a swiftie. fight me. 29. When Was The Last Time You Saw Your Mother: last night i’m still in bed lol 30. What is One Thing You Wish You Could Change About Your Life: my mom having the job she wants instead of being a librarian. nothing about me tho i’m good. 31. What Are You Listening To Right Now: i paused my music for that other question but okay the same song as before 32. Have You Ever Talked To a Person Named Tom: i know a tommy? but his full name is thomas. 33. Something That Is Getting On Your Nerves: fffffa- i’m not saying 34. Most Visited Website: google 35. Elementary: idk what that is but im assuming you mean primary school? so my favourite memories of primary school was egg-rolling in the park, my first best friend, sandboxes, jumping pig game, the ditch, cleaning fruit baskets, horrible pizza,SITTING ON THE MOTHERFUCKIN BENCHES, the music trolley, the ditch, love tunnel, shirt signing, plimsolls, penguin bar jokes, bringing in an old shirt for art, lunchables, recorder lessons, the shoes from clarkes with the shitty toys in the heel, doughnut socks, the 3d shape bag,PGL/ Residential trips, stuck in the mud, turning the lights off in the toilet, biff and chip, being told we were to big for the play equipment in year 6. (I feel like that was the most british thing I’ve ever written and any americans probably have no fuckin clue what half of these things are)

OKAY BUT I’M KEEPING  WHAT @teatowelhowell PUT BECAUSE as an american i have no idea what this says. like jumping pig game? lol is that like the frog jump game kids do? but pigs are frogs bc maybe there’s no frogs over there? altho i don’t think so. i know what a trolley is from british vlogs. but love tunnel? plimsolls? shoes with toys in the heels? biff and chip? huh? girl your language is confusing. as for my elementary it was pretty and i made a lot of friends but they all went to a diff high school & middle bc of boundaries so i only know like ten people from my elementary in high school. 36. High School: should i tell you? my mascot is shark 37. College/University: hm i wanna go to uc davis or uc something. 38. Hair Colour: brown with goldish highlights that are natural bc my dad used to be completely blond and i guess i got some of that 39. Long Hair or Short Hair: like medium 40. Do You Have A Crush On Someone: no bro just jensen ackles 41. What Do You Like About Yourself: i make friends with literally everyone i love it 42. Piercings: no bc i do year round soccer- for like ten years- so i never had time XD also i know why piercings are popular and how it all started with early us- natives- so idk it seems kinda uncivilized to stick a hole in a body part and put a stone in it. so when i’m done with soccer i don’t think i’ll pierce my ears bc it’s kinda weird to me 43. Blood Type: my parents don’t even know. whatever the most common one is, i’m sure 44. Nickname:(phoebe is pronounced FEEBEE) phoebs, phoebster, fo-e-be, phobe wan kenobi, anne (i give other people nicknames usally) 45. Relationship Status: go away 46. Zodiac Sign: leo. roar. 47. Pronouns: she/her 48. Favorite TV Show: Supernatural, Reign, Once Upon a Time, Sherlock, Arrow, Gravity Falls when it still lived 49. Tattoos: no 50. Right or Left Hand: right FIRST 51. Surgery: i had an extra tooth so i had to get that taken out before it grew in. but i also destroyed my elbow in kinder and had to get stitches? idk if that’s a surgery 52. Piercing: we went over my feelings on them 54. Sport: soccer! did flag football with my soccer team too for two years it was fun but all the guy teams beat us bc we weren’t really trying we were just laughing 55. Vacation: uhm my parents take me a lot of places so idr. uhmmm maybe yellowstone? 56. Pair of Trainers: trainers? uhm are those pants? a bra? oh lol i looked it up. they’re tennis shoes. my first pair were probably just nike. 57. Eating: wtf ? is this like the first time i remember eating? << wisehowell agrees with her. 58. Drinking: i’m not old enough to drink legally so 59. I’m About To: eat breakfast? 60. Listening To: uhm whattt i just said i paused the dang song so same oneee but here i’ll rec you a few artists: BANNERS, LIGHTS, and clairity. (those two are supposed to be caps) 61. Waiting For: school to kill me 62. Want: nothing just my friends 63. Get Married: sure 64. Career: that’s confusing YOUR TYPE 65. Hugs or Kisses: hugs 66. Lips or Eyes: eyes altho i have brown eyes and everyone hates brown eyes so idk man. but i’ve never been complimented on my eyes in my life so i feel rude if i say eyes bc as a lame eyed i know how cruel it is to judge by eye color 67. Shorter or Taller: i’m 5ft flat so everyone is taller than me 68. Older or Younger: idc 70. Nice Arms or Nice Stomach: no 71. Sensitive or Loud: idc 72. Hook Up or Relationship: relationship 73. Troublemaker or Hesitant: neither bro 74. Kissed a Stranger: no 75. Drank Hard Liquor: no I’M FIFTEEN usa has strict drinking laws okay like yea my uh fun friends get high and drunk but i’m a valedictorian i gotta keep my rep 76. Lost Glasses/Contact Lenses: i have glasses but i would never lose em 77. Turned Someone Down: when someone turns up i’ll let you know how it goes << I’M LAUGHING 78. Sex on First Date: again do i need to say my age 79. Broken Someone’s Heart: some guys had crushes on me and my friends told me that they told them like a year later so i guess i did 80. Had Your Heart Broken: no 81. Been Arrested: no, i luv rules 82. Cried When Someone Died: wth 83. Fallen For a Friend: nah my guy friends are too stupid to love DO YOU BELIEVE IN… 84. Yourself: yea 85. Miracles: no god isn’t real 86. Love at First Sight: uh we’ll see 87. Santa Claus: nooo not since i was four 88. Kiss on First Date: why not 89. Angels: no if god isn’t real why are his slaves (i’m kidding, i totally respect the religious community) OTHER… 90. Current Best Friend’s Name: i’ll give the first letters of the four. a, a, c, c. (i’m not kidding for whatever reason most of my close friends have a or c names like i had two old best friends with both a. and another with c) here i’ll tag one. @galaxy-searcher 91. Eye Colour: brown (boooooo) 92. Favourite Movie: idk i don’t pick favs but song of the sea is cute

uhm. i don’t want to tag people bc it’s 92 questions. do it if you want XD