#one of the best shows about the trials and tribulations that come with having narcissistic parents

[verysadlesbian]

Succession drinking game idea: take a shot every time oedipus's complex is hinted or Freud would at least smirk a little

[sergeantgoggles]

📚 👀

I know I’ve talked to you and a few others in CSP extensively about it for like, the last year and a half, but I would love to make the Camboy AU into a real work of fiction.

The biggest issue with that I think is that there is SO MUCH to it. Every single character has a long backstory with how they came to be where they are when we meet them in the main storyline that helps how they integrate into the core group. Even the parents and their later on children have stories and there is just no possible way to capture all of that in a form of written fiction that wouldn’t take me 27 years. Plus, it’s ever evolving, and so many people have given their input and time into making it what it has become today.

But, so that everyone else is clued in, here is the main ongoing story.

Alyxander “Tech” Techovsky is a college student pursuing his degree in rocket science. He’s had it rough for the last couple of years. His extravagantly wealthy parents have cut him off after finding out through nefarious means that their son is gay, and his drug addict ex-boyfriend (named Chaz), has abused him since, including but not limited to offering Tech as a sexual favor for him to get drugs, physically abusing him, and a load of mental abuse to go along with it.

After a night of Chaz’s excessive drinking, he threatens to kill Tech. He comes up with a slough of excuses as to why it would be better if he was gone, Tech reaches out to the only people who might still care.

Cue Echo Bowers, his first and best friend since elementary school who doesn’t come from much, but since his father is a teacher in their school system, he was able to get his school of choice throughout the years to stay with Tech. Echo and his middle school sweetheart, (also Tech’s other best friend since middle school) Lincoln “Fives” Rodriguez, come to the rescue.

Now the three of them are living on their own, and Tech really needs a job that will work with his night owl sleep schedule and allow him to be flexible with his classes. Through some thought and a few wild suggestions later, Tech decides that he’s comfortable enough with his body and his sexuality that he can work himself in front of a camera. It’s awkward at first, of course, but soon enough he’s gaining followers, subscribers, and is at least able to make ends meet just by being pretty and sexually with a few guys for some money. After all, there is no shame in sex work.

He gets plenty of DMs from guys wanting to hook up, and though some of them are tempting, that isn’t the kind of thing that Tech is looking for. However, there is one guy that messages him one night who has been subscribed for a little while, and something about him is different. Talking to him is easy, and Tech doesn’t feel like he has to fake it or put on a show for this guy, so he gets brave and asks what his real name is. He wants to know this man better.

“My name is Hunter.”

Hunter Sharp is a custom car and bike mechanic at a garage near the same city where Tech lives. He’s a couple of years older, and has no blood siblings, but he has an older step-brother named Cody Fett, and thinks of his boyfriend, Rex Tano, in a similar fashion.

The story is basically about how these two come together and work through the trials and tribulations of Tech learning how it’s okay that he’s not perfect because he is loved for exactly who he is, broken family and past and all. Not to mention all of the other characters that make an appearance: Jesse the baseball scholarship kid who wants to heal the world with music. Kix, the med student with narcissistic parents who just wants to be seen, Tup, Fives’s personal secretary who has to keep up with all of the latest drama and constantly cancel Fives’s meetings, Hardcase, the stoner photographer that Echo met during his study abroad in Europe. And there’s more, too!

This whole story means so much to me and I hate that I know I’ll never be able to put it all down and compile it into something cohesive.

[thecandywrites]

Jewel Of The North Chapter 12

Woo, I know it’s been a hot minute. But I gotta show Doug and Alorna getting their comupance because JUSTICE and REVENGE. Also, I wanted to send our little blended family on a cruise. Not just any cruise, but a Disney Cruise. Have I have been on a Disney Cruise? No. Do I want to? Yes. Did I watch three and a half hours worth of cruise videos talking about the Disney cruise ships and clubs and concierge level stuff for research? Yes. Is it crazy stupid expensive? Yes. Is this an escape fantasy from The Plague I’m living in? Yes.  Also because this is a fantasy story. I’m smudging reality. Becuase those pictures are from the Disney Dream, but last I knew it was the Disney Wonder that was in Alaska. But can I leave things there? No. Because I’m a Dramatic Bitch. And I live for the drama. And yes this has been sitting in my drafts for...way too long. But a few more bumps in the road, some hurdles AND THEN happily ever after. We are getting there. 

Jewel Of The North 

Chapter 12

Noah’s jaw was on the floor when you came out of the bathroom in the “infamous” gold dress as Noah wolf whistled. 

“Wow. That’s the gold dress eh?” Noah asked as he openly gawked at your body in it. 

“Yep. It’s the “gold maneater”. Every time my kids see me in it before now, they’ve always complained, because both already have to deal with enough of the “your mom’s a MILF” comments as it is and they think it's too risque for a woman my age. I actually got this dress as a dare from Tasha who said I need a “back on the market and on the menu” dress. Blossom calls it my “get dicked down dress”.” You laughed as you struck a few poses for him as Noah had a hard time forming a coherent sentence and simply made a string of half word-like sounds along the lines of ‘yeah’ ‘mmhmm’ of agreement as he simply settled for gestures of approval and agreement cause his words were failing him. 

“Yeah..that’s...that’s exactly what’s going to happen.” Noah reassured you which made you laugh even harder. 

“Oh I know. It’s the last night of the cruise, I wanted to go out with a bang.” You shrugged as you slipped your shawl on. 

“Ready?” You asked him. 

“I uh, I’ll need…” Noah tried to hint as he tried to adjust the bulge in his pants, it had only been hours since you had sex shortly after lunch, but he couldn’t help his reaction to you and he doubted he ever would get used to you or stop reacting to you like this. 

“A moment?” You guessed as you beamed smugly, happy to elicit such a reaction from him, even after you thought he would be sated, at least for a few hours but you would be lying if you claimed you didn’t want Noah to try to rip this dress off of you and ravish you- preferably after dinner because you had worked up an appetite. 

Being married to your former husband, Andrew, he was ok in bed. But he wasn’t necessarily “sexy” to you, at least in looks. He meant safety, security, stability and comfort for you when you met him and married him but eventually, the spark left, the more narcissistic traits you saw and experienced and the more of an ‘asshole’ he acted and the less natural chemistry you had. He didn’t always know how to get your engine revving and keep it revving. Mentally or emotionally which eventually bled into physically. 

But Noah? Oh, all you had to do was think about him and your whole body was humming and buzzing with delight, anticipation and- what you had thought was your long past dead sex drive- which thanks to the awakening it received from Noah, was very much alive and well and practically insatiable with Noah and even though you were losing count of how many times you had had sex, or made love in all of it’s forms, you hungered for more. And with just a look, a touch, or gesture, or especially warm, wonderful words and deeds from Noah and it was all over for you. He was...everything you had ever wanted or needed and you were so grateful you had waited for him because he had been worth the wait and definitely worth all the effort and he made all the bad times and obstacles and trials and tribulations up to this point- worth it and was the last piece of the puzzle and completed everything and you couldn’t wait for him to fully join and complete your family. 

Once Noah “recovered” enough, you went to dinner and if Noah had thought you garnered a lot of attention in the red dress, it was nothing compared to the attention you received in the gold dress. He never heard so many ‘god damn’s’ or ‘wow’s’ or even ‘holy fucking shit’s’ from guys and even other women when you strut past, with your arm happily hooked in the crook of Noah’s elbow. 

You were happy that his own gold tie matched your dress flawlessly so that it was clearly evident that you were a couple and one hell of an attractive one and you couldn’t help but notice how the women who weren’t looking at you, were staring in awe at Noah. And while you, understandably, weren’t necessarily one of the jealous types, it filled you with pride to be on his arm to show him off, cleaned up and looking like a million bucks himself and you felt so lucky to be with him.  

Even after dinner, when you went to one of the “clubs” on board, it was wonderful when Noah danced with you. Andy didn’t dance and hated to dance with you even though you loved to do so and would begrudgingly dance with you at weddings, only when you begged and pleaded for him to. 

Noah though? The man, thank the gods, had rhythm, and could keep up with you on the dance floor and the two of you danced really well and the chemistry you had in the bedroom spilled out everywhere else. You were so focused on grinding on Noah with his hands possessively on your hips and riding the hypnotic beats from the music to notice how Doug stared in disbelief as he watched from a safe distance while Alorna was in the restroom and felt jealousy eat him alive, that could have been him. He could have been the one to dance with the hot millionaire MILF. What did Noah honestly have that he didn’t? Was it because he was an ice orc instead of a “traditional” green one? Or was it the plane? Probably the plane. 

When Alorna came back she scuffed in disgust to see you and Noah on the dancefloor cutting it up, like you were in your own little worlds as she watched how all the guys who had been staring in desire at her, were now staring at you, their jaws on the floor and their hard ons tenting their pants.

“Come on Baby, lets go back to the casino, let her have this little tiny club, I’m feeling lucky tonight.” Doug insisted to get Alorna out of there before she started a fight because he could see the fire in her eyes that she wanted to start one. 

“So do I.” Alorna cooed as they strut out of there and went back to the casino and in the beginning they were winning back all their previous losses, but just like any casino, the longer they played, the more they lost until they lost even more than what they had previously won and then some. 

But all of that was a world away from you and Noah. 

You barely made it back to the room before Noah hiked your dress up, pulled your breasts out, moved your slimming panties to the side and fucked you into the back of the door of your room while sucking on your tits as you moaned and keened in ecstasy, to the point no one could pass by the hallway without knowing exactly what you were up to inside the room and by the time you made it to the bed, your dress was ripped, Noah’s buttons on his shirt had popped off and the room looked like a hurricane had torn through it and Noah and yourself slept like the dead, having worn each other out half the night. 

In the morning, you both got the remainder of your things together and checked out of the room and were happy when even with some shopping on board, you still had left over credit and you had the cruise cut Noah the check for your surplus and just as you disembarked, you watched as Alorna and Doug were arrested by four police officers as they had tried to disembark. 

“Get your hands off me!” Alorna screeched as she struggled as Doug was struggling too before both of them got tazed and pissed themselves as you and Noah gasped as you watched on from a safe distance before you two couldn’t help but snicker a laugh as everyone else watched on eagerly and laughed as they recorded it to upload it onto YouTube as the cruise simply handed them a very hefty bill, from not just their room and drinks and spa services and add ons but also a bill for tens of thousands owed at the casino.

“Wouldn’t want to be them.” You practically sang to Noah as you both laughed, watching them get their comeuppance. 

“Me neither.” Noah shook his head as you both eagerly watched as they were hauled off and you and Noah got your baggage and got a taxi to the hotel you would be staying in tonight before you would have to go to the airport the next day and each of you would fly your separate ways home. 

Once at the hotel you went ahead and booked the Disney cruise for the dates that worked best and went ahead and booked things for all the kids, the extra experiences and excursions you could, you wanted Sakura to have the princess treatment, and knew that Skylar, for as tomboyish as she was, she wouldn’t say no to some pampering, nor Zane for that matter as you did the same for things for you and Noah as Noah made plans of where he was going to park his plane and stuff and meet back up for the cruise before you made more plans of how you were going to move Noah and his own animals and pets and things down for the winter and when and even ordered new things to decorate Sakura’s room with because you were taking Sakura, and her pets home with you after the two families met and would hopefully, with all fingers crossed, would get along and get her on your insurances, get her in school and get her room ready for her so that moving in would be as easy and hopefully seamless as could be and even made plans so that Noah could fly his family down to see where Noah and Sakura would settle in for the winter and have a chance to have a really big, proper gosbe and merging of the two families in September as everyone in your family was eager to meet Noah and Sakura and their family too. 

You spent the last night together holding each other tightly, making promises and plans as you made love slowly, savoring every nano second because it would be a while before you would have the opportunity to have this pleasure with each other for a while. The next morning at their airport, Noah waited with you at the gate since your flight left before his, not wanting to spend a single second without you- that he didn’t have to and gave you one hell of a kiss goodbye. 

Several hours later, you both arrived home and while you were happy to be home, you missed Noah and Sakura especially and once the kids were dropped off at home, you sat them down to bring them up to speed with the first part of your plan and were surprised when both of them were ok and at peace with it, and strangely- eagerly looking forward to it and when they asked about the second part of the plan, of Noah and Sakura moving in with you for the fall, winter and spring and Noah working on flipping the estates while they were in school and you were at work- they were actually impressed and relieved that Noah would be “pulling weight” and working with your dad on the houses too and were more interested in the how rather than the why of the matter because they could tell that you genuinely loved Sakura and Noah and they were grateful that at least Noah was “connected” to people they knew and trusted, mainly, your father. 

“Ok, I’ll be honest, I totally thought I was going to have to do a lot more convincing.” You admitted to them once you seemed to have laid all your cards out on the table to them. 

“Grandpa Gru vouched for him and when Grandpa Gru talked with Noah’s dad Ukluk and Noah’s former father in law Tonrar, we were right there and got to hear most of it and we got to talk to them too and they’ve been talking back and forth ever since and Grandpa Gru has been telling us about him and Sakura and they were really nice, and we got to talk to Summer and Isla and we got to talk to Noah’s siblings, well, all of them except Alorna, who’s apparently in jail for slandering you as a priestess, which isn’t cool, but you can’t please everyone. But otherwise we got to talk to his former siblings in law too and even Sakura’s cousins who all seem really cool and they’re all pretty normal, which is a good thing. And to hear all of them be honest about Noah and his situation and especially about Neena and their relationship and how he treated her and how he treats his family as well as the circumstances of her own death and how he’s dealt with it, in particular how he didn’t turn to the bottle or any other vices, or even his own temper, impressed us, like a lot. And instead of a “sales speech” about how great he is, to hear he’s imperfect and makes mistakes but tries his best and treats the people around him respectfully and really well and has honor and a strong sense of duty and was already making sacrifices for people around him, and has similar values that we have and has a very similar situation that we have. That was enough for us. We also comprised a list of questions for him.” Xander revealed before they showed you the list. 

“Aww, this is really comprehensive.” You praised as you looked it over and grinned when you already knew the answers to most of these but you’d leave it to Noah to confirm them himself. 

“Can I copy this?” You asked. 

“Please do.” Skylar nodded before you went to your office and took a photocopy of the list, both sides before you took pictures and then took a pen and added a third page of things they didn’t come up with that Noah had to offer and things to talk about before you copied that and handed it to them to look at before you got a call from Noah. 

“Yes?” You answered when you picked up only to hear Sakura’s voice on the other end. 

“Hi Mama,” Sakura greeted you sleepily as you looked at your watch and noticed that it was bed time in her time zone as you yourself were feeling quite tired. 

“Hi Honey,” You greeted, your heart melting in your chest as your soul ached to be holding her again. 

“Can I have a bedtime story?” Sakura asked. 

“Of course,” you readily agreed. 

“I gotta read Sakura a bedtime story.” You informed your kids who both grinned knowingly and were happy to see you happy before you went upstairs to the bookshelf in your kid’s old playroom and got an appropriate story to read her and once Sakura was put to sleep, you talked with Noah and told him about the list and the developments with Sky and Zane and what your dad had done which Noah was very grateful for as Noah revealed that after you had boarded your plane and he was waiting for his own, that he got a call from your dad and the two talked for a couple of hours while he waited as your dad got to have a good conversation and came to an understanding and was surprisingly sympathetic and really nice and welcoming and Noah had a really good feeling that they were going to get along just fine and when he talked with your Mom, all your mom wanted to know was about his pets and horses and what he liked to to eat and drink and otherwise welcomed him with open arms which made you blow out a breath of relief you suggested that for next year that he would probably need to put an addition to his house for everyone which he was more than happy to agree to because his house currently was only a cottage sized house, big enough and cozy enough for Noah, you and Sakura but with adding Skylar and Xander and the menagerie to the mix, not so much. And even the barn would be cramped but Noah’s plot of land was definitely big enough to accommodate your needs and it could be made to work. 

In just the span of three weeks, you had turned one of your guest bedrooms into a bedroom for Sakura and worked overtime to make it perfect while also working with your dad, your brothers and brothers in law to make sure the outbuilding, aka the man cave- was ready for Noah and and looked into zoning for several acres of land to see if you turn it into a runway so that Noah wouldn’t have to rent a space at another air field and looked into commissioning an airplane hanger to be built on the property too since you had bought up the surrounding farmland. 

But that time seemed to fly by and now your children and yourself were waiting in the lobby of a hotel, waiting for Noah and Sakura to arrive while you and your children all played games on your phones as they were also waiting, having brought gifts for Sakura which were in gift bags while your own gifts had been a new suitcase full of new clothes and things for them both. 

While all of you were excited, you were particularly anxious because the weather forecast told you that this week was going to have some storms and you weren’t sure how the cruise was going to go if the weather was bad, but you had an abundance of seasickness medicine and other medicines, just in case. You were prepared. 

Finally Noah and Sakura made it into the hotel and the moment she saw you, she let go of Noah's hand and bolted for you. 

"Mama!" Sakura shrieked in delight as you readily got up and closed the distance as you caught her in your arms and tried and failed not to cry, when you got to hold her again as you kissed each other all over as Noah came over and simply kissed you sweetly before the three of you made it back over to where Xander and Skylar were still hanging out in the lounge area, gift bags in hand and friendly smiles on their faces before Sakura got down and practically tackled Skylar and Xander with hugs which made the kids laugh as Noah was holding Sakura’s gifts for your own children. 

“Hi, I'm Noatak, aka Noah, nice to meet you both.” Noah greeted your kids with a handshake which they were happy to give him, staring up at this mountain of a man, kind of awe but still a trace of fear because he was still just a little fear inspiring in person but they weren’t terrified or anything. His smile and demeanor and especially his energy was friendly and while they could tell he was nervous, he seemed to radiate calm and warmth, which is what Skylar picked up on the most and just by this first impression, she was cool. Xander, was still reserving his final judgement though. 

“Hi, I'm Skylar, you can call me Sky for short,” Your daughter mirrored and echoed back to him as she watched as her little hand disappeared into his much larger one. 

"And I'm Xander but you can call me Zane for short too." Xander replied before Sakura happily exchanged gifts as Zane and Sky were excited to see what Sakura would get them before a discussion was held about where to get dinner at before a place was decided that was within walking distance where the kids happily walked with their gifts, eagerly talking and getting to know each other which left you and Noah to walk hand in hand only a step behind them. 

“Here, you left this.” Noah said as he tried to hand you a check for the entire amount that you had left him on the day he flew you out. 

“Oh no you don’t. You need to keep that, it’s our money now, who knows when you’ll need it, moving can be expensive, as are planes, I know you already had plans to upkeep the plane this winter, I just made the “how” a little easier.” You argued as you took the check and promptly tore it into little pieces and stuffed the pieces into your pocket to burn later. 

“Nice try though.” You cooed to him. 

“Well then the moment we get back, I need to put you on my bank accounts so that you can access it anyway.” Noah insisted. 

“Only if you’ll let me do the same for you and my own accounts.” You proposed. 

“Only the small ones.” Noah gently countered. 

“Fair enough.” You grinned with a soft chuckle. 

Over dinner the kids brought out “the list” of questions as you and Noah sat side by side in the booth while the kids sat on the other side of the table as they went down the list while you waited for the food. 

“So what was your first job?” Zane began. 

“Well officially, the first job I had that came with a paycheck, was actually on a fishing boat, fishing for snow crabs and just about everything else under the sun up there and that’s how I saved up my money to buy the plane. But otherwise I have been flying with my dad in his plane since before I was old enough to legally drive as did my brother who actually flies for USPS.” Noah revealed which got all but Sakura to blink in surprise. 

“Well that might come in handy, there’s supposed to be storms this week on the cruise, I’ll need your help getting my sea- legs.” You murmured. 

“Oh there’s plenty of tricks to getting the seasickness to abate.” He reassured all of you which made you feel better about the prospect of spending a cruise on stormy seas as he simply squeezed your hand reassuringly. 

“So how did you know that our mom was the one for you?” Skylar asked which got Noah to bark a laugh for her bluntness. 

“Direct, I like it, actually, she was the answer to a lot of prayers, the least of which was financial.” Noah began. 

“I had been praying, ever since Neena died, so for a while now, for the right woman to look at Sakura and see a daughter, her daughter specifically and love her just as much as I do and would want to be her mother and would be an excellent mother at that and be what Sakura needed to help her heal from the loss of her first one. And have a future with her without erasing or ignoring the past and who would respect our culture and not look down on it, and would help her embrace it. And your mom did all of that and more, like so much more than I ever could have thought to hope for, much less pray for.” Noah answered as you practically glowed with pride next to him and smiled so adoringly at him and thanked all the gods for a man who finally recognized your contributions and gave you credit where it was due. 

“Because she prayed with me to the same gods my first mama and all my grandparents pray to and then she showed me how she prayed to hers and we shared a lot of the same ones and she made me my summer solstice outfit, just like my first mama did, only better. And hugging her felt like I was hugging my first mama, that she loved me just as much.” Sakura volunteered which melted everyone’s hearts. 

“And it became immediately apparent to me just on that first day that it was The Gods Will that everything that I packed for Taylor and her family, I packed two, and both sets made it and it just so happened that Noah needed everything that I had packed but he didn’t ask for any of it and I sincerely doubt he ever would have either. But he did appreciate it and was more than deserving of it too and while his house wasn’t the biggest or grandest house I’ve ever been in, he built it with his own two hands and he built it well and it was full of more love than anything which was very keenly felt. And I could tell that Noah took care of his house really well too, everything was in good working order, and well maintained and neat and orderly and pretty clean too. He’s been used to doing all the domestic chores along with earning an income and providing for his family just like me and trying to carry everything all by himself which is hard and a burden- I’m all too familiar with myself and he cooks really well too. So, win-win.” You added with a proud smile which got Sky to smile fondly and even Zane to grin as he sat on one side of Sakura while Skylar sat on the other side of her which Sakura couldn’t be happier about, being surrounded by her new family. 

“So how did you know that Daddy was the one for you Mama?” Sakura asked you in turn. 

“Well he also answered a lot of prayers for me too. So on the trip up to the Frozen Tundra, I had to take a flight and a short cruise up there and it was just non stop men with a few women too, both married, divorced, single, in and out of all kinds of relationships and it was just a barrage of mostly guys wanting to buy me every drink at every bar that they could make- in an effort to have sex with me and I was really sick of it, been sick of it for years now and I was worn down and weary of it all. Like even the spa manager on that first cruise ship tried to have sex with me so my guard was up and I figured I wouldn’t have a break from that until I got to Taylor’s house when surprise- surprise, even there, I ran into the same thing from her brother in law and the whole way up I had been praying that I would find a friend and find relief from all of that and lo and behold- Noah was there waiting for me to get off the boat and he didn’t flirt with me once on that first day or even the second and not really on the third either. He was nothing but respectful and professional to me even before I met him and after he met me in person he showed unbelievable restraint and self control which encouraged me to do the same, because the moment I saw him in person, I thought he was the most handsome man I had ever laid eyes on and there was that instant attraction, connection and chemistry and even with all of that, he let me just hang out and help him in exchange for flying me all over which I love flying and at the first subtle sign of discomfort from other’s advances, he didn’t hesitate to protect me and shield me from those unwanted advances from everyone else and it was such a welcome relief, like it was walking into a cool air conditioned room to rest and get replenished and feel completely safe while also feeling completely free and it was so wonderful to feel that after being in the oppressive heat all day with buzzing mosquitoes trying to suck every bit of blood and joy and peace from me they could and it was really nice and refreshing.” You began which got Noah to huff a laugh. 

“That’s funny I felt the same way but kind of the opposite.” Noah said. 

“I was oppressive heat?” You laughed. 

“No, no, no, it was the opposite in that for me it felt like it was the never ending winter and oppressively cold, but with you- it was like getting that first warm breeze of summer, where the winter finally shakes it’s hold on everything and wishy washy spring where it’s cold one day and hot the next only to be cold the day after that- it felt like winter was finally over and once that warm summer breeze rolls in, it’s even and stable and you can trust that it’ll stay warm instead of trying to rip it away in two seconds, and you did smell like some tropical blooms in paradise, and what was really poignant, was that morning when I dropped Sakura off at my mom’s, my mom said her tea leaves told her that I would find Paradise that day and at the time I had no idea what she meant but the second I met you, it was crystal clear.” Noah explained. 

“Which is why I called you Paradise at first Mama and because she showed me the tea leaves and then did some more and they told me that you were a really good mama, one of the best.” Sakura sighed dreamily as she smiled adoringly at you as you mirrored her. 

“Aww, that’s so sweet!” You fawned as you picked up his hand and kissed the back of it sweetly before you reached across the table to stroke Sakura’s cheek with your palm and smiled even brighter when she leaned into your touch as Zane and Skylar smiled fondly too as that seemed to cement things for Skylar especially, the gods themselves picked Noah and Sakura out for them and through destiny itself, brought them together.  

“So anyway, when I first came up, when I finally got to him- others tried to flirt with me, once he observed that I was tired and uncomfortable, he shut them down and stood up for me without asking for anything in return or trying to flirt with me himself even though at the time I would have probably flirted back but because he showed restraint, I showed some too and he was generous with me without any thought of being paid back for any of it and treated me like we’d been friends for years and we just got along and we clicked on just that base- friendship level because he thought I was married and I thought he was married and we both deeply respected those boundaries and didn’t push them and when we found out that we were both widowed, it didn’t jump straight from friends to romantic, it stayed friends and it grew very organically from there and he went above and beyond for me, helping me with my luggage, helping drive half my crap to Taylor’s house, and hugging him that first night felt like hugging home, only it wasn’t a home I had known yet and it was such a relief all around and a very welcome change.” You explained. 

“Yeah except, because you were that wonderful paradise compared to everything else and it’s not like I wasn’t immediately attracted to you either. You were wonderful on the phone and then when I saw you coming down the pier with a plane load of cargo, I figured you were my fare but the closer you got, the more I could see and I had every intention of meeting you halfway but once I got a good look at you, my whole body just froze and my brain shut down and my eyes got tunnel vision and I just watched completely bewitched as the most beautiful woman I had ever seen in my life who looked like paradise incarnate, coming down the pier and so that’s why I just stupidly stood there and stared at you like an awkward teenager and then when you saw me, smiled politely and turned and called me and pulled me out of that daze, I almost said ‘sorry, we don’t get too many drop dead gorgeous women up here’ but that would have been incredibly unprofessional and inappropriate and my mouth has never worked that smoothly with my brain and then when I was driving you to the plane and I’m seeing every sailor, every passenger, every guy with a pulse stop, stare and do a double take, I thought I needed a warhammer strapped to my back and I thought I was going to be fighting all of them off just to keep you safe because we may live in a polite- modern society but that can change in a hot minute and I had to hide behind my sunglasses and I was terrified something was gonna happen to you and so I had to call Taylor and voice my concerns to her because again, didn’t want to be rude to you and told her that you needed a bodyguard and she told me to volunteer basically before she laughed and hung up.” Noah confessed. 

“Really?” You and the kids all laughed in delight, grateful that there was that instant attraction and chemistry. 

“Yeah, so like I just had to put myself on my best behavior because I did not want to mess up anything with you.” Noah explained. 

“Well obviously it worked.” You reassured him. 

“Plus when I met Sakura, I had the most overwhelming mothering urges towards her, like every instinct in my mind and body was telling me to love her and take care of her and do everything in my power to make sure she was ok and help her in any way I could, whether it benefited me or not. And when I got to hug and hold her for the first time, it was like I was holding you guys after I first gave birth to you. That ‘there you are, I’ve waited so long to finally meet you and I’m gonna love you forever.’ feeling.” You repeated and even now Noah still got misty eyed just thinking about it as Skylar had her arm around Sakura and hugged her tight too. 

“And that’s exactly what I prayed for.” Noah repeated. 

“And then to know that he wasn’t a stranger or just some guy- but to know that it was Grandpa Gru’s old airforce brother from another mother, that- that- was his dad and that our families had actually been old friends before my dad had moved us away, that if my parents had stayed we would have grown up together and probably would have been friends starting then too. And the fact that Taylor also vetted him for me, and that Taylor knew him and knew his family too so that I had not just that childhood connection but also have that mature adulthood character reference and his reputation alone was outstanding and the fact that he not only respected me but respected my profession too which is a really big deal, especially for me, when so many think it’s an invitation for solicitation, but not him, he recognized that it was, not just my bread and butter but actually my calling and was really helpful and supportive.” You mused. 

“Well and likewise, because you were the first client since Neena died that didn’t haggle me or look down on me because I was an ice orc and a pilot and you didn’t treat me and my family like tourist attractions which has happened a lot before and you respected me and my profession which also went a long way too.” Noah confessed. 

“Yeah, being objectified sucks, we just get objectified for different things. I’m actually worried that’s gonna happen on the cruise, that you and Sakura will get patronized because you’re ice orcs and get roped into posing for other guests who think you’re part of the experience.” You confessed. 

“Nah, I wouldn’t, if Sakura and I brought our native regalia, maybe, but since we didn’t, I doubt that’ll happen, I don’t think people will care enough to notice us because usually we get ignored everywhere we go that isn’t home where we know everyone.” Noah reassured you. 

“But, back to what we were talking about, the moment you came into my life, suddenly money was the last thing to matter to me, all that really mattered was Sakura and you, and making sure both of you were ok and taken care of and most of all safe.” Noah professed. 

“Aww, I had the same feeling but especially for Sakura, like I knew you would be ok and could take care of yourself and I knew Sakura would be ok as long as you would be successful so making you as successful as possible so you could continue to care for her became my immediate goal. Which is why once I found out that your competition was undercutting you to steal your already limited pool of clients, I felt I needed to try to help any way I could and it ended up working out really well. And what worked out even better was that all the money that I made that first day, even when I went and didn’t expect to make any money at all, I spent helping you even more so that it was in no way a burden and the more I gave and the more I helped, the more blessing and happiness I got in return and the blessing didn’t stop at you and Sakura, it went to your family and Neena’s family too and even the clans, despite Alorna and Doug’s attempts to sabotage that because the seeds and things I brought from the lower 48 that I barely spent anything on- ended up getting split up and going to all the clans and it all got used and appreciated which is, at the end of the day, what matters.” You added. 

“And it proved to everyone what a fine woman you were that even in the face of deep disrespect and sabotage that you kept your cool and kept your composure and were classy and gracious and respectful and still honored the clans and the council, which was the right thing to do, it wasn’t easy and I didn’t make it any easier on you either.” Noah confessed. 

“How did you make it hard?” Zane asked with a frown. 

“I took her concession as her giving up on me and Sakura and it wasn’t that at all, she was in her own priestess regalia and in regalia, she has a code she needs to abide by and I didn’t take that into account or consideration at all and I, very wrongly jumped to the conclusion that she was giving up and I will probably regret that mistake till the day I die.” Noah readily confessed which impressed Zane and Skylar that he was humble enough to admit he made a mistake and owned up to it and didn’t sugar coat it or downplay it but was actually very factual in his recounting which was very honest and forthcoming, which they respected and admired. 

“Well you need to forgive yourself for that, I know I have, and beating yourself up for a mistake won’t get you anywhere.” You comforted him with another squeeze of his hand. 

“No but it sure did teach me some humility and the lesson to not to jump to conclusions and to actually talk things out and figure it out instead of just emotionally reacting.” Noah gently countered. 

 “And it taught me to explain myself before misconceptions and misunderstandings happen because the difference in culture is still there.” You allowed. 

“Huh,” Zane hummed and shrugged it off. 

“But that’s still a really good thing that you would admit that you were in the wrong and obviously you apologized and tried to make amends and that you’re humble enough to admit that you were wrong and learned lessons, even as an adult.” Skylar praised. 

“And what an apology it was.” You grinned cheekily which got Noah to blush and smile bashfully. 

“It wasn’t just sex was it? It was an actual apology right?” Zane pressed. 

“Yes, it was an actual apology, like, crying, on his knees, begging for forgiveness and admitting fault and promising to do better and then following through with actions.” You reassured Zane. 

“And then yes, sex.” Noah took a chance and teased Zane which got Skylar to snort a snickering laugh as Sakura giggled too as Zane just sighed tiredly and resigned himself to this even though secretly he was relieved that it was Noah that you had chosen, or the gods rather, because now that you were in a serious relationship, his friend’s dads would hopefully now be deterred and stop drooling over you already.

“Yeah, I guess that’s inevitable and part of a healthy, committed monogamous relationship right?” Zane returned, trying to be cool about it because he could tell Noah was being harmless, in his joking and appreciated the gesture and could humor him. 

“Yup, very healthy,” You nodded. 

“And very committed and monogamous.” Noah nodded in turn. 

“So have you ever killed anyone?” Skylar asked which got you and Noah to laugh because she just- came in from left field with that one. 

“No, I have killed many animals though, for hunting purposes because hunting and trapping is legal and absolutely necessary if you’re going to live up there.” Noah answered. 

“What’s the biggest thing you’ve killed?” Skylar asked. 

“A bull moose that was just over 1500 pounds, getting that thing to my plane was the hardest thing because you have to dress it in the field and carry it out in pieces and carry it out quickly before the wolves and bears get wind of it. But thankfully I was hunting with my dad and my brothers and brothers in law so we all helped and we got a few moose that day, it set up the families for most of the winter actually.” Noah began before he recounted his other hunting expeditions and by the end of dinner, Sky and Zane seemed happy and satisfied with Noah’s answers to his questions and Noah in turn got his own questions about you and them, answered too. 

You went back to the hotel and you tried to “ease” everyone into this by getting two hotel rooms, one for Noah and Sakura and the other for your kids and yourself, but they were right next to each other and had a door from one to the other that you kept open and once the kids got dressed to go swimming in the hotel’s pool and Noah got to see you in a bikini again, he nearly lost control and had to actively remind himself that not only was Sakura around, but your own children and the guests at the hotel meant he couldn’t just scoop you up and fuck you against the closest surface. The bikini wasn’t even all that “sexy” it was actually modest compared to most but your body in it was giving every ounce of will power he had a run for its money. 

“Did you miss me?” You cooed to him as you caught him staring at you as you laid out the kid’s towels down over the sun chairs as you taunted him by wiggling your butt just enough to make it jiggle a little. 

“You have no idea.” Noah returned huskily as he simply came up behind you and wrapped an arm around your waist and pulled you flush to him to pin his hardening cock to your backside and left the most salacious kiss on the side of your neck, your knees almost buckled from under you as you dropped your own towel on the ground as your whole body betrayed you and you were ready to rip your bikini off of your frame and offer yourself to him poolside. 

“Fuck.” You cursed under your breath as it was suddenly unbearably hot in the sun, because Noah had practically set you on fire with just that little touch and kiss. 

“You kiss your mother with that mouth?” He teased you. 

“You keep pushing it and this will end in one of two ways, I get away from you so I don’t fuck you in front of the gods and everyone- right here, right now and scar the kids for life or you can figure out a way we can both sneak away for five or ten minutes so we can get our own private business taken care of.” You offered as you bent at the waist to pick up your towel and to feel his shaft tried to spear the cleft of your ass as it laid against the length of it.  

Thankfully the kids soon made friends with the other kids swimming at the pool and Noah and yourself did manage to “sneak” into a family’s restroom. 

That door was barely shut and locked before Noah ripped your bottoms off as you barely had a chance to step out of them before he picked you up, pinned you against a wall and entered you roughly then started up a very earnest and powerful rhythm as he kissed you like a man starved while you clung to him like a lifeline while you tried to stamp down your whimpering keens and feeling rejoined was feeling like you were whole again. 

“Gods I’ve missed you.” You confessed between scorching hot kisses. 

“Missed you too, my hand has been a poor substitute.” Noah confessed which got a giggle to bubble from your throat. 

“Likewise.” You returned as his hips snapped forcefully into yours and the pleasure was almost overwhelming, after three weeks of just talking on the phone, seeing him again in person, the magic and the sparks and the chemistry was still there, if anything there was more of it. That three weeks had felt just as long as the two years between losing Andy and finding Noah to begin with and it was crazy how in a month, what once was a stranger was now the center of your life and the same could be said for Noah. 

But at least you had all the texts, phone calls and emails. And thankfully Noah had been busy with his business while you were gone, having practically worked nonstop once he got back. And you talked to both him and Sakura at least once a day, especially at night, reading stories to Sakura to put her to sleep and then talking to Noah about his day after putting Sakura to bed. And sometimes it was just decompressing or heart and soul bearing conversation and other times it turned into some really amazing phone sex. But none of it held a candle to the real thing and way faster than you were expecting, you came in a shuddering keen, nuzzling your face into the crux of his neck and shoulder while your fingertips dimpled into the meat of his shoulders and back and it took less than ten pumps later before Noah finally let loose himself and pumped you full of his seed, a growling groaning moan as he simply pinned you against the wall and held you tight and nuzzled his face in the juncture of your own neck and shoulder and breathed in your scent deep into his lungs, feeling anchored by it because now, that he had you in his arms, he didn’t care about anything else. Everything else seemed so far away now. 

By the time you made it back out, Sakura was on Zane’s shoulders as he and some of the other kids there were playing chicken and didn’t notice that you and Noah had stepped away it seemed as you both slipped into the warm water and swam around until the sunset and you finally got to go back to the rooms where you happily put Sakura to bed, snuggling with her in her bed as you read a story from your phone to her as Sky and Zane got ready for bed in their own bed across from you and watched on fondly before they fell asleep after Sakura did before you happily crawled into bed with Noah, made love and then fell asleep in his arms, finally sleeping well for the first time in weeks and Skylar and Zane didn’t have any issues with it in the morning which was a relief for you and Noah. 

Before loading the cruise ship you had Noah take you and your second set of luggage and a huge crate of gifts for kids, all of Sakura’s cousins on both sides of her family since you and your kids had insisted on also getting gifts for their soon to be cousins and loaded those up on the plane so you wouldn’t have to worry about those gifts getting dirty or damaged before they could reach their recipients and your kids got to explore Noah’s plane which they thought was really cool, Skylar actually did summersaults down the cargo hold as Zane sat in the cockpit and eagerly looked at all the controls and was asking Noah about what each one was and did which made you happy as Noah promised that after the cruise, he would let them fly the plane for a few minutes on the way home which made them really happy and excited for. Which made you so excited to see everything again, but instead of the eyes of a visitor but from the eyes of a soon to be local. 

Thankfully you got onto the cruise ship early because you were in the concierge royal suite and not surprisingly, Zane and Skylar seemed to make new friends right at check in, some of them had even been at the hotel the night before and even Sakura made new friends too which gave you some relief that she wasn’t being left out or ignored. Skylar and Zane could make fast friends wherever they went when they wanted to and for a week long cruise, they could do so freely to make the trip more enjoyable and Skylar and Zane had gifted Sakura a little notebook to write down all the names of all her friends so that once they got on board they could send each other gifts and “pixie dust” to other guests which Zane and Skylar insisted that all the kids staying in all of the handicap rooms on board get pixie dust in particular which damn near made Noah cry because of how thoughtful and inclusive they were to include them as Sakura also agreed to do the same which made you particularly proud. You had also spent the last three weeks making sure that you would have all the extra touches and flourishes that would make the cruise memorable and special for everyone. 

Once you were invited to board, you got your pictures taken and then it was announced to the welcoming crew that the Kintucks and the Kingsleys were arrived which Sakura thought was really fun and once onboard the concierge lounge on the ship, you got each of them the program for the cruise and your highlighters out and brought out the list of things you had already put into your agenda, like princess makeovers and royal tea service for the nights you would be going to Rapunzel’s Royal Table for dinner where it was basically Disney’s version of “formal nights” as all five you got to have your choice about activities for the cruises. 

Noah, unsurprisingly, was happy to just be along for the ride. Sky and Zane were really looking forward to all the kids clubs and since this was Sakura’s first cruise, much less a Disney one, she was just eager to experience everything she could as Skylar and Zane were equally eager to share the experiences with her while you were eager to have some good proper alone time with Noah because your suite had two huge whirlpool tubs, one for the master and one for the kid’s room and while you brought plenty of bath bombs for the kids, you also brought some for yourself too along with some amazing lingerie just for Noah’s enjoyment, as all of you tried to get used to the rocking of the boat. 

“So...what’s that trick to getting your sea legs?” Zane asked Noah as you could tell from his expression that he was getting a little queasy as he sipped on his ginger ale. 

“Ok so back when I was on a fishing boat, what we would do is we would fill the hold up with sea water, get our gear on, as if we would go overboard and we would take turns throwing each other into the holding tank, like throwing each other as high in the air as we could, with more flips and twists, the better and when the body gets thrown around like that, it’s forced to re-calibrate itself and even in a really bad storm there is always a rhythm to the waves that your body gets used to, we would barely be out of port and we would start doing this, usually on the third throw, maybe the fifth throw if you’re really bad off, you’re good to go, now the biggest trick is when you get back on land, your body will still want to follow the rhythm of the sea and you can get “land sickness”, which is getting sea sick sitting perfectly still, but again, it’s the same trick to get out of it.” Noah explained.  

“So you yeet us basically.” Skylar grinned excitedly. 

“Yeah, into the pool.” Noah nodded. 

“Yes!” Skylar cheered which got Noah to laugh as he looked around casually and noticed something...odd. 

“Hey, not to be a worry wart but we might have a problem, 8’oclock.” Noah murmured to your family as he looked around casually again which got everyone’s ears to pick up. 

“What?” You asked, as you instantly looked around yourself before you noticed the family in the direction Noah alluded to before your own stomach dropped. 

“They’re looking at Zane pretty hard.” Noah realized. 

“Ah, fans, this happens quite a bit, hopefully they’ll be cool and not swarm me.” Zane muttered in resignation. 

“Cause of your YouTube channel?” Noah asked. 

“Most likely, they don’t look like the ballet following type.” Zane answered. 

“If they come over and bother you- do you want me to get rid of them?” Noah offered casually. 

“Uh, well, there’s no reason to be rude, but yeah if they get bothersome and hound me, please do.” Zane answered, happy and relieved that Noah would even offer before the family couldn’t help it and came over. 

“Hey, are you Zane Kingsley, with King’s Snakes?” Another boy asked Zane as the family from across the lounge had been staring and gawking at Zane the moment your family had been waiting to board the ship and Noah noticed Zane plastered on that same, forced polite smile you did that first day when that whole tavern tried to buy you drinks as Noah looked from Zane to you to see you did the same thing as Skylar didn’t bother hiding her annoyance at the intrusion while Sakura looked on curiously as she ate her snack. 

“Yeah, that’s me,” Zane reluctantly confirmed before the whole family seemed to gush and fawn and geek out that they met a “celebrity” on the cruise before they all got pictures with Zane as Zane humored them and gave them autographs while he tried to keep it about the snakes, asking if they had any and was happy that they were looking to buy one soon. 

“Oh my goodness, look at us being so rude, are you vacationing with your family?” The mom asked. 

“Yup, that’s my mom Zara, my sister Sky, my soon to be stepsister Sakura, and soon to be step dad Noatak.” Zane introduced which brought a more genuine smile to your face. 

“Oh wow, you guys are ice orcs aren’t you?” The dad asked. 

“Yup, we’re from the Sungilak tribe too.” Sakura volunteered. 

“Oh that’s so awesome, do you mind if we get pictures of you guys too? We’ve never met ice orcs before, you have such beautiful coloring.” The mom tried to flatter. 

“Sure.” Sakura agreed before she smiled really brightly for them as you and Noah shared a meaningful look before the family seemed satisfied they left you alone. 

“Gods, please let that be the only time that happens.” You muttered to Noah worriedly as you squeezed his hand as you walked the halls to your suite to get changed into your bathing suits since the luggage that wasn’t your carryons had already been delivered. 

You all got to your room and just as the other guests were boarding, Noah took the lifeguard aside and explained what he was about to do to you and your family and got special permission to do so since he would be throwing you guys much higher and farther than would normally be allowed but they trusted Noah for his word and his experience. 

Skylar had never screamed more gleefully in her life, even on roller coasters, she didn’t squeal so loudly and Sakura did about the same and Zane even let out a shout or five as you marveled at Noah’s strength in not only picking you up but throwing you just as high and just as far as the kids but it worked like the charm it was. Then Noah jumped and did flips in the air to calibrate himself to it and once done, all of you happily went back to the room to fully settle in and get ready for the sailing away party as Sakura got to be on your shoulders while Skylar requested to enjoy it on Noah’s shoulders and was happy to be the tallest in the crowd that was gathered. 

The first two days of the cruise were perfect, everyone got to have all their fun events that they wanted to go to and no one had issues with seasickness at all and you and Noah got to fully reconnect and Noah loved the lingerie and loved getting it off of you in record time too while the kids were in their kid’s clubs and do a lot of crafts in the oceaneers clubs. 

The third day however, the storms hit and thankfully you were in the middle of the ship so you didn’t have to have deal with the bow going up and down with the waves, but the winds and rains hitting the glass of the veranda was the scariest thing you had encountered on the sea as all three of the kids huddled close to you in your bed as Sakura was squarely on your chest, Zane was under your right arm and Skylar was under your left and Noah was on the other side of Skylar as Noah simply smiled fondly to see you comforting all your children through the storm and was relieved that none of you were faring badly because of the seasickness as you all huddled together under the blankets during the worst of the storm. 

Then after that, the storms passed and things went back to normal however, for the rest of the cruise, your family soon garnered more and more attention every time you left your cabin as Zane got an exorbitant amount of attention and “pixie dust” from just about all the kids on board because the news of “a celebrity” had traveled fast and even Noah and especially Sakura was approached a lot too, to the point that Noah actually did have to intervene and remind the other guests that you were all on a family vacation and that if they wanted pictures with ice orcs, to get them on shore with the others who were actually dressed to cater to tourists but that he and his daughter were not part of the attractions themselves and that Zane was also on a private family vacation and appreciated his privacy which Zane had never been more grateful and thankful for Noah to do as Skylar was more adoring of him in those moments than she had been yet because usually you fiercely protected Zane from “fanatical fans” but with Noah, he was the best deterrent yet and she had immediately claimed him as her step dad and had instantly started calling him "Dad" which Noah got used to pretty quick as Zane had to get a second piece of luggage to pack all of the “pixie dust” from the cruise. 

Then when you got off the boat with your luggage, Noah flew you back to your family’s new home away from home, to meet his family which your kids thought was the coolest thing to be flown in and all took turns in the cockpit with the head gear and help steer the plane and then the kids happily loaded themselves into the back of the pickup truck with their luggage and thought the Frozen Tundra was really, really pretty, with the mountains and the greens and the swaths of wild flower blooms in the other fields and you had them also pack gifts for their soon to be cousins as well, making sure that all the kids were accounted for and prayed that the kids would like the gifts as you went to Noah’s house first to unload all your luggage as Zane happily poached stickers and other items from all the “pixie dust” that he got form all his “fans” on the cruise and added them to the gift bags for a special Disney touch to them. 

You were never more relived to see Neena's family with the Noah’s family again as they still gave you the same warm welcome that they had done last time and Sakura was so proud to introduce her new siblings to all her cousins who were thrilled to get presents as you and Noah watched on, as Skylar of course, wanted to wrestle with her new boy cousins while Zane was content to simply sit and talk with his new girl cousins as they all happily played with their new things of slime happily around the card table in the game room. 

“Ok, you guys can wrestle if you want but here are the rules, no broken anything, no broken noses, wrists, elbows, knees, ankles and obviously necks, we don’t want to take anyone to the ER today, that kind of thing. No pulling hair or braids or anything like that, and anything that a bathing suit would cover is off limits and of course, honor the tap out code and only displays of good sportsmanlike conduct is allowed. And boys, if you’re not cool with a girl like Skylar getting the best of you and beating you, don’t wrestle with her in the first place. She’s had a lot of formal training. Skylar, only match what you’re about to be given, no ganging up on anyone, lets play fair, one on one or two on two or however it has to go to be even. No breaking furniture or windows or anything like that, let’s be respectful of each other and the space. No trash talking or anything like that.” You specified, making sure you made eye contact with all of them before they all eagerly nodded their agreement. 

“Ok, have at it then.” You agreed before you backed away before it descended into controlled chaos.

“Does that happen a lot?” Isla asked as she sat next to you on the couch with Summer as you all watched as Skylar happily started pinning each one down to the ground as all the boys were beyond happy and excited that a girl was willing to play this rough and could go toe to toe with them and they didn’t have to worry about holding back to keep from hurting her cause she was one tough cookie. 

“Yeah, now don’t misunderstand, the two of them could just as easily switch places. And at home, Zane is Skylar’s workout and sparring partner so he knows everything that she does martial arts wise and in school he was the one to restrain her when she would get in fights in school so he knows those holds better than she does. But he prefers to make interpersonal connections through talking. Skylar, is obviously more physical and they’ll both bond to everyone else, just through different means. And Skylar, is actually a really gifted, graceful dancer and Zane can do all kinds of lifts with her and it helps her keep her own balance in the martial arts, but she prefers the skin on skin contact and getting to know each one by playing like this.” You explained before you watched Skylar actually kick one particular boy cousin off of her with so much power he practically went flying backwards about 10 feet, a few feet off the ground as Zane saw him coming and pulled the other girl cousins out of the way so they didn’t get pulled into it and hurt as the boy got up and laughed and dove back in as the other fathers watched their sons play fight with amusement as the other women were puting the finishing touches on dinner as Noah had never beamed with so much pride at seeing Skylar seem to take on two at a time with ease and judging by all the bright smiles on all the faces of the kids, they were all definitely having fun. 

“So how was the cruise?” Noah’s brother Nago asked from the pool table.  

“Uh, it was a mixed bag honestly. The first couple of days were awesome. Then word got out that “a celebrity” was on the cruise and then it wasn’t so great. Zane has a YouTube channel about breeding ball pythons and he’s only ten but he’s already making money as a breeder and he’s actually really, really smart when it comes to their care and genetics and medical care. And so, because of that exposure, he gets recognized a lot and he got recognized on the ship and he signed more autographs than Mickey Mouse did. It was insane. And it got to the point that he had me step in and remind these people that he wasn’t at an expo, he wasn’t on this cruise for any kind of publicity but he was just on a private family vacation and it’s a good thing I have a mean glare to keep them at bay but it was the same people who objectified Sakura and I the whole time, thinking because we were ice orcs that we were part of the cruise and the experience too, that wasn’t cool and Zara showed her claws a few times trying to keep Sakura safe and not hassled either and the staff of course was really cool and understanding and helpful. And then of course we had those storms roll in and it got pretty dicey a few times and if I had not done the water tank trick on all of them and myself, all of us would have been sicker than a dog that whole time. But even with all of that going on, Zara never faltered once. She was amazing and kept everyone safe and together and having a good time and to Sakura, she just thought it was the best family vacation she had ever been on and thankfully didn’t think the attention she got was a bad thing as Skylar warmed right up to me and loved it that I was bigger and taller than anyone else on board and loved to sit on my shoulders to watch all the shows that weren’t canceled due to weather. Zane is of course reserving judgement which I can’t argue with or find fault in. So, like I said, mixed bag.” Noah surmised. 

“Well of course it wasn’t going to be perfect. Nothing ever is.” Ukluk noted. 

“No, I wasn’t expecting it to be but I just wasn’t exactly expecting what we got either.” Noah muttered as he continued to watch Skylar closely to make sure she wasn’t getting hurt before she put one of Sakura’s cousins, Kako into a choke hold. 

“Hey! Kako! Tap out, she’s gonna make you pass out buddy.” Noah suggested as Suka laughed at how his son was being put into a choke hold as Kako never looked happier to be in such a state. 

“I’m good!” Kako tried to say as he waived off his uncle in between trying to squirm out of the hold only a minute later he went limp into a pile on the floor before Skylar let him go and rolled him over with the help of his siblings and other cousins as they all cheered that she had knocked him out before they clamored for her to do the same thing to them. 

“Really?” Skylar asked. 

“Yeah!” They insisted before Skylar looked at you and then to Noah and the other dads for permission. 

“Go for it!” Nago, Yakone, Tonrar, Dave, Max and John all encouraged her. 

“If that’s what they want, go for it Sweetie.” Ukluk laughed and gave her the nod before she beamed and outright tackled the rest of them until she had all the boys passed out on the floor around her and stood and caught her breath and appraised her handiwork while Noah and his brothers and brothers in law and his father and father in law all give her high fives and teased that she needed to come over to their house for sleep overs to do that to their sons that night for bed. 

“If this was two hundred years ago, she would be getting marriage proposals left and right for that.” Isla practically cackled to you which made the rest of you laugh with her. 

“Yeah, most of the boys at school already view her as this little warrior goddess as it is. And she’s only 8, just turned 8 too, I can’t imagine what she’ll be like at 18, but my rule is, no dating while in elementary, middle or high school. If you want to date in college that’s your choice but nothing before that.” You insisted. 

“Ooh, that’s gonna be hard, especially up here, most are matched before high school graduation.” Isla grimaced. 

“Well then she’ll be one of the few who aren’t as will Zane, and Sakura. Because they’re children right now and they should focus on being kids, having fun, enjoying hobbies, learning life skills and school. Not anything romantic, they’re still growing and developing and maturing for their age, romance should be the last thing pushed onto them.” You insisted. 

“Agreed.” Noah practically boomed from across the room which made you smile even brighter as Skylar then joined Zane’s group and met all the girl cousins and sat next to Sakura and put her arm around her. 

“Can you show me how to do that?” Sakura asked Skylar. 

“And me?” The other girls chimed in. 

“Yeah sure, wait for them to wake up first.”  Skylar said as she nodded over to the boys who were still passed out before their mothers came down to get everyone. 

“What happened to the boys?” Samantha asked worriedly, seeing her sons passed out on the floor. 

“Oh Sammie, you should have been here! So the boys found out that Skylar can wrestle, asked her to put them in choke holds which she did! It was the single coolest thing I’ve ever seen.” Nago laughed giddily as he went over to his boys and picked up their arms and let the arms drop. 

“The boys...asked for this?” Samantha repeated. 

“Yeah, and of course I was cool with it and gave her permission too.” Nago insisted. 

“We all did.” All the guys insisted. 

“...ok. Well dinner is ready, and they need to wake up for dinner.” Samantha insisted before all the guys murmured their agreement and woke up their sons who almost jolted awake.

“Hey bud, how do you feel?” Suka asked Kako. 

“I feel fine, that was really fun!” Kako beamed happily. 

“Good, I’m glad you had fun, time for dinner.” Suka insisted as he helped his son to his feet before all the other boys as they all happily got up and went upstairs and happily told their mothers all about how awesome Skylar was and how she plays just as rough as they do which made their mothers happy to hear that they were getting along and you and Noah were finally relieved that this time, things were going much smoother.

[ladyandtheghost]

Reason #22: The Queen, the King and his ‘Key’: Sansa is the “Key to the (King in the) North, a.k.a. Jon’s ‘weakness’ and Cersei will use it. 

This is a speculation meta about what I (like many others) believe could be a likely scenario for Season 8 involving Sansa, Jon and Cersei. Earlier this year there had been spoilery pics that may have hinted at a possible ‘abduction’ plot, which would confirm that Cersei will manage to retrieve Sansa from Winterfell and bring her back to King’s Landing and that Jon will come after her.

In earlier metas we’ve discussed how Sansa is Jon’s big “weakness” (mirroring Missandei being Grey Worm’s only weakness), meaning the prospect of something “happening” to Sansa is to her is Jon’s secret fear. Some might argue now that this could also apply to Arya, only that Arya is far more dangerous to Cersei than the other way around and more than capable of defending herself, ergo it is highly unlikely that Arya would ever be in danger of being captured. With Sansa, however, there have been heavy hints and foreshadowing galore that sooner or later Cersei will get her hands on her, and that she will not be forever *safe* in Winterfell.

And the reason why I am quite excited about this possible scenario rather than terrified is because I think this will entail a plot that might bring Jonsa to the surface and take the “sub” out of the Jonsa “subtext” of S6 and S7…

So how would this actually come about? 

The “Protection” Challenge: 

Sansa’s infamous statements regarding her safety - “No one can protect me.” (6x09 and 7x01) not only sound like a challenge to Jon, but also as if she is somehow jinxing herself. Unlike Jon, Sansa is constantly aware of the threat Cersei poses to all of them, and to herself in particular. And she reminds him of it: “There’s nothing between us and Cersei.”: 

Sansa: “If you’re her enemy she’ll never stop until she’s destroyed you. Everyone who’s ever crossed her she’s found a way to murder.”

 Jon: “You almost sound like you admire her.”

 To Jon, Sansa’s words sound hyperbolic – like he cannot imagine Cersei having such strength and power. The Cersei Sansa paints here sounds like an Super-human who can make the impossible possible and Jon doesn’t believe in this kind of power coming from a Lannister (he’s met Tyrion before so). To him the threat – also to Sansa – is in the North, not the South and he doesn’t *want* to worry about Cersei as well, no matter how much Sansa talks of her as an almighty force to be reckoned with here.

And this imo is yet another sign that Sansa will be right and Jon will be wrong - the Battlement Scene about Cersei is basically a reprise of the ‘Tent scene’ and Sansa telling Jon that he does not *know* the enemy like she does and that he is underestimating her. Jon dismissing her worries will definitely come back to haunt him…

 Bottom line is, if Cersei does manage to get Sansa this will be a major narrative twist that will affect a lot of major characters. In another post I write about Sansa’s “Queen’s Watch” and all the characters who have come to care about Sansa and protected her at some point in her life: Brienne has sworn an oath to protect Sansa and if Cersei gets her, well, we remember how she reacted after she failed to protect Renly. At the moment Sansa has the most skilled assassin in the world by her side and we know that Arya is already hellbent on killing Cersei, so kidnapping Sansa would only give her another reason. The Hound and Tyrion might reunite with Sansa and both of them have cared about her wellbeing in KL, so here is another two characters who would give a shit about Sansa being abducted by Cersei.

HOWEVER, the character who would without a doubt be the most affected by such a plot would be Jon. From the moment of their reunion when he declared that “father’s ghost” would come and murder him if he failed to protect Sansa to the Tent Scene were he promised to protect her, to his choking the living daylight out of Littlefinger, it is being made BLATANTLY clear that Jon is extremely protective of Sansa. This even comes up in their subtexty-UST squabbles: 

If Cersei manages to retrieve Sansa and bring her to King’s Landing, we WILL see Rage-Kitten-Jon ON STEROIDS. We saw him completely lose the plot with LF in the crypts, so there is no doubt that Jon will go absolutely nuts if *anything* happens to Sansa in S8. And I think this will also be incredibly interesting in terms of the Political!Jon debate. Right now, many viewers are led to believe that Jon is acting on “emotion”, that he knelt to Danii and declared her his Queen in front of the Dragon Pit crowd because he is in love with her and acted on “feeling” rather than rationally and politically. I personally think that we will get to see in Season 8 that all of Jon’s actions in S7 had actually been rational and calculated and political IN CONTRAST to his actions in Season 8 which will be driven by emotions and feelings, namely when Sansa is in danger.

Right now Jon thinks he’s on top, he has Daniis’ support and two dragons at his disposal, he feels in control of the situation. And we know that this rug will be pulled from under his feet several times in the last season, with the Targ reveal to begin with. There will be challenges and “trials and tribulations” for Jon in S8 and one of them will involve his failure to protect Sansa from Cersei and we will see him do everything in his power to get her back. His interactions with Cersei so far had been all political - but when it comes to Sansa, it will be very much PERSONAL. 

Sansa and Cersei - A “Complex” Relationship: 

 It’s imo one of the most fascinating relationships on the show, because there are so many different layers and overtones between Sansa and Cersei that you are never quite sure how they feel about each other. It’s a very twisted, complex Mother-Daughter-Friend-Enemy-Love-Hate relationship that was acted incredibly well by both actresses. The fact that all through S7 antis and haters would insist that Sansa was “becoming” Cersei (the only indicator being that her wig looked similar to Lena’s earlier wigs) shows that a lot of viewers do not even understand the complexity and nuances of this relationship.Sansa admits that she learned from Cersei - which does not mean that she learned to be a bitch or how to take revenge on people, it means that she has watched her carefully and understood how the “Game” works which enables her to turn it around and protect herself and her loved ones from other “Gamers” such as LF. There is no doubt that Sansa is repulsed by Cersei’s actions and when she “acts” as QitN in S7 we actually see her making the opposite choices that Cersei would have made: making sure there is food for all the people, refusing to seize power from Jon when the Northern Lords begin to rebel against him...all of this makes her the Anti-Cersei rather than a copy of her.

 The Queen’s Persecution: Sansa as Snow White, or, The YMBQ : 

When I saw the still^^ from “Mirror Mirror” the other day, I suddenly got this Sansa-Cersei vibe that had me consider their dynamic as being very much inspired by the fairy tale: vain narcissist mother-figure/Queen, kills King and seizes power, paranoidly fears “younger and more beautiful” daughter-figure/princess will arise and “cast her down”, evil Queen wants her dead, princess has to flee, finds refuge in a home with seven men who love her, guard and protect her...and once the Queen who believed her dead finds out she is alive and happy, does everything in her power to come after the princess.

The prophecy by Maggy the Frog of the “younger more beautiful” queen coming to cast Cersei down and take all she holds dear sounds is definitely a parallel to the famous mirror in Snow White that told the Queen that there was someone “displacing” her as the “most beautiful” in all the lands.

Cersei thought this “other” would be Margaery, and now she thinks it’s Danii, but looking at all these parallels to Snow White, it’s really Sansa who fits the role of the “other”, the princess who is “more beautiful” best, not only in her relationship with Cersei, that was quite ‘evil step-mother’-like but also in terms of her entire storyline of being persecuted and fleeing KL and finding a home and seven people who love and guard her...

To me this is just another heavy hint that there will be an abduction plot involving Sansa and Cersei in S8...

The thing is, Sansa is sure that Cersei will kill her as soon as she gets her hands on her, but I am not altogether sure that this will be the case. Vain and narcisstic as Cersei is, she likes to have people around who flatter her, make her feel powerful and “reflect” her (”Mirror, mirror on the wall like”) - Jaime being the best case - or her own flesh-and-blood, her children. Most interestingly, of all her children, the one Cersei loved the most was her daughter, Myrcella. But ironically not because she reflected her, but because she was so unlike her. 

As is Sansa.  

And this is partly why I think that Cersei will NOT kill Sansa (though she will make her a prisoner), aside from the fact that Sansa is far too valuable a hostage. Weird as it sounds, but Cersei had a genuinely soft spot for Sansa, at least as far as she was capable of having “affection” for someone other than Jaime and her children. Of course she did not love Sansa like she loved her offspring but we know that Cersei cared for Sansa in a half motherly, half mentoring kind of way. Cersei treated Sansa much like a pet (not unlike Joffrey, but without the sadistic psychotic overtones). She called her almost affectionately “Little Dove” and as Sansa herself complains that Cersei won’t leave her alone, Shae notes that the Queen probably sees something in Sansa that makes her seek her company: 

Basically a huge compliment^^

This in turn is also why - despite knowing that it was Olenna who killed Joffrey - Cersei still resents Sansa and would do everything to steal her from WF and Jon. She felt betrayed on a PERSONAL level and we know how she reacts on such occasions: 

Indeed. And she will fetch them back. 

It is often said that Cersei sees ‘herself’ in Sansa. I do agree that Cersei sees “something” in Sansa or at least “senses” something about her that simultaneously fascinates and repulses her. I don’t think it’s that she sees “herself” so much than the opposite. If anything Sansa reminds her of Myrcella, of whom she said: 

“She was good. From her first breath, she was so sweet. I don't know where she came from. She was nothing like me. No meanness, no jealousy, just good.”

At the same time there is also something in Sansa that she does not trust and that she also resents - a lot: 

“You’re perfect, aren’t you?” 

When Sansa “acts” more responsible and Queen-like than her, calming down the women with song and prayer in the middle of the crisis rather than drinking wine in a corner - Cersei tries to make Sansa “act” more like her, orders her to sit and drink with her and talks of seducing Stannis and how Sansa should learn to use what’s between her legs. It’s a popular scene that often earns Cersei kudos for being so “honest” and telling it as it is, but what this scene really highlights is how she did NOT manage to turn Sansa into a younger version of herself - but that instead Sansa clearly somehow affected Cersei who realized that the “girl” she always looks down to has qualities that she will never possess - even if she regarded those qualities as weaknesses at the time. The ironic twist that Cersei’s greatest enemy (beside the Valonqar) - the YMBQ - could be her own ‘pet dove’ who she had trusted and been grudgingly fond of, would make all their scenes of previous seasons so much more poignant.  

Jon Snow’s Weakness --- Sansa as the “Key to the (King in the) North”: 

First as a hostage, then as “key to the North”, Sansa was always a valuable prisoner to the Lannisters. And I think that at some point Cersei will realize how important Sansa is to people - and most especially to Jon -  which would make her not only a political hostage but also a personal one.  

Jon Snow, where we last saw him at the end of S7, is currently (and quite literally) “on top” of the game. He is in the best possible position to see his plans through with two dragons and a Targaryen to ride them at his disposal, with a Dothraki army and basically all other armies Danii commands at his disposal, with dragon glass galore and the entire North united, ready and prepared for battle – and on a more personal level – with the bonus happy news of Arya and Bran being alive and safe in Winterfell…Jon is flying HIGH right now.

And Jon believes that the battle against the Night King and the WW will be the hardest thing he will have to face – he also thinks that he’s prepared for all the losses now, for all of them to win or die in the war against the Dead.

We already know that there will be one major shocker for Jon to cope with: the Targaryen reveal. And while I think this will bring on a major identity crisis for Jon, I can’t see this distracting him from the battle he was single mindedly focused on for so long. Jon tells us himself that the Night King is all he can think of:

“I’m consumed with the Night King because I’ve seen him. And believe me, if you’d think of little else if you had, too.”

The word “consumed” always gets me here when people assume that Jon is actually genuinely “distracted” by Danii or has feelings for her. Jon says it more than once – ALL he can think of is the Night King and ALL he is consumed with is the Night King and NOT Danii Targ. If anything, DT fits perfectly into Jon’s plans against the NK.

I mean could it BE any more convenient for Jon? The thing that supposedly distracted you from your biggest enemy just HAPPENS to be the weapon against your biggest enemy. Ever since they won Winterfell back, ever since Ramsay is out of the way, Jon had been named KitN and succeeded in all his endeavours (similarly to DT in Essos) – because he just HAPPENED to fall in love with the “right” woman?

I won’t get into Political!Jon theory now – but let’s just say that it would explain the weirdly overly “convenient” narrative of S7 and give a lot more depth to Jon’s character and supposed “luck” in securing the deadliest weapon imaginable for his war just by merit of falling in love.

Regardless of what happens with the Night King, or what the Targaryen reveal will mean for Jon – both have little to do with the fact that Jon is underestimating the “enemy in the South” and that 

Cersei will be the “factor” Jon does not reckon with.

In many ways, what we will see in S8 is a “chain” of weaknesses: Cersei hates D and wants her dead but D is supposedly the strongest and has no weaknesses --- except the King in the North whom she is in love with. The King in the North in turn also has one weakness --- his sister/cousin Sansa Stark.

Logic (for Cersei): Sansa is the “key” to controlling Jon.

I’m sure a lot of Antis/Haters/D and JD stans will spit and spew and claim that even IF Cersei had it in for Sansa --- Jon wouldn’t care THAT MUCH about Sansa. And I say, please rewatch all of S6 and S7 and you will realize that there is a pattern, a theme almost of Jon caring for and TRYING to protect Sansa with everything he has.

And I say “trying” because Jon still has to actually fulfil his promise and keep the oath he made to Sansa: “I’ll protect you, I promise.” And I do not mean to demean Jon’s fighting efforts in the BoB, he did everything he could to protect Sansa – but fact is that in the end, Jon had to be saved by Sansa and Sansa was in turn saved by LF and the Knights of the Vale. The thing is, Jon is very much AWARE of this failing on his part. I wrote about this and how this also stoked an underlying rivalry between Jon and Littlefinger in another post and it rankled with Jon that it was Littlefinger who came to Sansa’s “aid” when he failed to protect her. Viewers are actually repeatedly reminded of all the times other characters “saved” and protected Sansa: Brienne and Pod and Theon – which even gets its own big scene at the beach when Jon tells Theon “what you did for HER”) So…the question is what will JON do for HER in Season 8? After all the foreshadowing and all the times Jon and Sansa talk about his protecting her and not letting anyone “touch” her and Jon choking the shit out of Littlefinger, literally “demonstrating” what he will do to anyone who “touches” his ‘sister*...

I feel very strongly that Sansa will be the “Key” to Jon’s arc in Season 8 (as D had been in S7) also because so many viewers don’t even pay attention to her, she is the perfect Red Herring. We know there will be a showdown with Cersei that will involve Sansa, because nothing and no one else could be reason enough for Jon to fight, kill and die for to protect other than the woman he swore to “watch over” and guard with his life, the woman he nearly chocked a man for admitting that he wanted her, the woman he spared a family traitor for because he owned him her life...

They demonstrated his protectiveness of Sansa for a reason. Arya is just as important to Jon, but she will not be the “Key” in Season 8 as she has her own story to finish, her own demons to slay (Cersei being only of them). 

Jon threatened to kill Littlefinger “himself” if he touched Sansa. Now that Littlefinger is dead, this scene has become a stand-in for someone, anyone who dares to touch Sansa…

So if we’re all not totally off with our speculations and the abduction plot does happen, we it’s safe to say tht Jon will go totally berserk and it will be a thing of beauty (at least for Jonsas everywhere):

[hellboundbutsleepingsound]

there were times i had wholeheartedly sunken myself into islam, ‘submitting’ completely and trying my best to follow the teachings, better myself, be sincere blah etc. but no matter how much i tried, it never sat perfectly well with me. i had so many questions and all of the answers when i asked came back to ‘yes, but allah is god, he created us and he knows best, so don’t question his eternal wisdom’. and i’d say okay, well i’m already believing in a god that i can’t see, i already have faith in a being i have no evidence of, let me just follow whatever he says to do and maybe one day the benefits will be clear. but my conscience would never let me. if allah said all humans are equal and they are only better than each other in terms of their worship of god, how much more and better they do etc, then why, why are men superior to women? they kept telling me ‘oh islam loves women, women are powerful in islam’ 

but why are men the guardians of women if women are so powerful? why is their inheritance worth less than their male counterparts? why are the dress codes much different -and harsher- for women? why is women’s testimony a joke? because a woman’s testimony counting as less than man’s even by a minuscule is a joke to me, a demeaning one. as if women do not have rational minds. as if women cannot even trust their brains. as if women are more mindless animals than rational, thinking humans. why can men have more than one wife? i always asked my mom and she told me i would make a very jealous wife. but why? why shouldn’t i want the person who has promised to spend their lifetime with me all to myself? why should i have to share? why does allah endorse men’s infidelity? my mom told me that men are more prone to committing zina because their sexual drive is higher than women’s and having more than one wife available to a man at any given time would make a him less likely to commit zina. to be honest, this broke my young heart. to think that my religion would condone my husband cheating on me and i would have to be pious and pretty, even smile at my co wife. how demeaning. how belittling. 

why does allah endorse rape? by bringing forth this twisted perspective that men cannot control their sexual urges - and like an animal- need to mate immediately they feel them, makes it seem like it’s okay for men to use women as a vessel for their pleasure. for their carnal needs and nothing more. why is it that this beloved religion portrays women as nothing more children-bearing-house-keeping-pleasure-giving-weak-willed-vessels to be controlled by men? that a woman’s place does not go beyond the four walls of a home-cell. passed down from man to man in her lifetime, from her father then to a demon disguised as a husband whom she must answer to, as if he is her saving grace and obedience to him will lead her to god? in fact, islam continually broke my heart. it is a sin to be a ‘bad wife’. but islam says that i must obey my husband because he is my guardian. that when i get married, my husband has the most rights over me, even more so than my father. are two people in a marriage not equal? that i cannot argue with my husband because we are both human and equal and my opinion is not less than his? that if i deny him sex, i will be cursed by angels? am i only a pleasure giving vessel? 

it seemed to me that islam was all about submission but it would be better for you if you are a man because men are above women and children. the teachings of islam in terms of women is one i can go on about for days, and it seemed i was going to settle for a life of oppression at the hands of men, endorsed by god almighty so i could reach his perfect little heaven that i also may or may not reach for the slightest of things, even if i faced many trials and tribulations...

god said that he created man with a rational mind so he can think for himself, unlike animals. but why is questioning islam and allah a sin? why is questioning anything about this perfect religion a ticket to hell? and god said that he is the one that shows people the right path and he is also the one that leads them astray. so if he is merciful and loving and benign, then why, why would he create a burning pit of torture? if you are a god at all, why would you create a hell for your subjects if you really are merciful and forgiving? unless you are a bored, narcissistic jerk who wants his balls licked? why would you let people die unjustly in war, let children be blown to bits and die of starvation? why would you let the miseries of the world happen if you had the power to stop them? you mean to tell me that allah is all powerful, there is nothing he cannot do yet he lets people suffer in the most wretched of ways? why does this god who promotes goodness and the spirit of good actions not do anything about the sufferings he can help? what does he do on his throne in heaven, close his eyes and listen to the praises he’s being bestowed and ignore everything else? wtf? what a jerk???

submitting to islam is giving up on life. and i realized that was what i was submitting to. a life of oppression, unhappiness, misogyny, disrespect, mistreatment, silence, anguish. that’s what islam is. it’s like islam was concocted by some elites who wanted most people to suffer in a half-life, sacrificing and submitting with the promise that good things were yet to come in an afterlife, only for the elites to stay powerful and fulfilled and the rest oppressed.or maybe islam was made up by some of the most brilliant story-tellers, an impressive piecing together of bullshit. it makes sense that islam is man made. humans are brilliant at making things up. we love to engage our imaginations. but like all things human, surely there will be flaws. and if you see past the coat of ‘peace, loving, tolerant,’ bulllshit, you will see that islam is deeply flawed. horribly so. 

[stephenjaymorrisblog]

1965

(Year One of My Rock & Roll Fandom)

  By  Stephen Jay Morris

Wednesday.   June 12.   2019

©Scientific Morality

             Selective memory?  Why not?  It’s my past and I can review it anyway I want!  Yes.  I do remember the bad times. Yes.  I try to avoid past mistakes.  True. Nostalgia is a symptom of depression. I went to my doctor and he prescribed a drug from which I am still withdrawing!  You want to know what’s over rated?  Modern day.  Now! The only people who are happy are narcissists.  Technology?  Fantastic!  Pretty soon a drone will deliver my pizza.  I’m still waiting for flying cars.  Well?  Where in the fuck are they!?

So, let me indulge in my reminiscences of a crappy youth.   I may die of natural causes tomorrow.  This is my party and it’s freaking me out, baby!  You don’t dig old farts?  Then flake off!

           Every older generation thinks the music they heard in their youth was and is better than that of the present day.  I plead guilty.  Let’s explore why I feel that way.

A certain musical tone will reflect the character of the times.  As recording Technology changes and improves, the tone of music changes.  In my youth, analog magnetic tape produced an inimitable sound.  In the 50’s, most music was recorded live onto a two-track, stereo tape.  In the, 60’s it grew to four-track and was no longer done live.  Engineers would overdub recordings onto each individual track. Well, not to go over the evolution of recording, but to put it succinctly, recording went from analog to digital.  Hell, you don’t even have to sing well anymore; you’ve got auto tune!  Warning:  old man whining alert.  That is why there aren’t any more requirements for talent.  It’s all about sex appeal and fake masculinity and not emoting the lyrics of a song.  It’s no longer about art!  It’s about being a braggadocios Dandy.  Well, you can have it.   Not me. I am going back to 1965.  

Where do I start?  All I need is a list.  The science community always said that one’s olfactory is a trigger mechanism to memory. You smell something familiar and you are transported back in time.  For me, it’s a song.  With every song, comes a memory.  Here is an example:  Whenever I hear a Four Tops song, like “I Can’t Help Myself (Sugar Pie Honey Bunch!),” I remember my dad driving my young family to the Natural History Museum in Exposition Park.  We would drive through the Black community of South Central Los Angeles to get there. I would see Black kids sitting on stoops of old Craftsman houses, listening to portable radios blasting out that Motown sound.  They were engaged in happy conversations or good, old fashioned horseplay.  I wanted to get out of the car and join them! Instead, I had to listen to my dad pontificate, like he was some collage professor!  I would later learn that he was really stupid and it was all a false front.  What I resented was his absolute control of the car radio.  We either had to listen to news or a station that played only classical music. Conversely, whenever my mom drove the car, she would tune it to the local pop/rock station.  I used to tell my mom I was saving up to buy a Japanese transistor radio.  I really was.  I had my own piggy bank. In 1963, she bought me a transistor radio for my birthday!  For the next two years I would listen to Dodger radio with Vin Scully.  Then, I saw the Rolling Stones on the Ed Sullivan Show.  I recently looked this up: It aired on a Sunday, October 25, 1964. That would be only time my dad allowed me to watch the Stones on T.V.   After that, he would chase me out of the room because of something negative about them he’d read in the newspaper.  But, all I needed was that first exposure.  I fell in love with Rock & Roll!  

I must have spent a lot of chump change on batteries for my handheld radio.  The station I listened to the most was 93 KHJ AM.  It had the strongest signal in Los Angeles, 1600 Kilocycles.  At night, its waves would travel all the way to Utah! Then, there were the DJ’s who had funny pseudonyms like “Machine Gun Kelly,”  “Bobby Tripp,” “Robert W. Morgan,” “Sam Riddle,” and the one and only, “Humble Harve.”  He would play the most Rolling Stones records than any of the other disk jockeys.

In 1965, radio was popular among teenagers for music listening.  Television soon got worried, so they created dance shows to attract the youth market.  On the local stations there was “She-Bang,” “Hollywood-A-Go-Go,” and “Boss City.”  On the major networks, there was “Shindig,” “Hullabaloo,” and “The Lloyd Thaxton Show.” They all booked musical acts who would come on and lip-synch to their records.  They also featured dancers, most of whom looked like mannequins. These shows aired for either 30 minutes or one hour.  However, the radio was on 24 hours a day!  That was except for holidays.  Every Christmas and New Year’s, they played only stupid Christmas music!  Radio was everywhere you were!  At supermarkets, car garages, public parks, the beach, and just about any place within earshot.  I did most of my radio listening in the privacy of my bedroom, with the door locked.

There wasn’t much reading material for Rock fans. There were the teenybopper magazines like “16” and “Tiger Beat.”  These consisted mostly of gossip and interviews with the musician of the month, asking such questions as what his favorite color was.  I’d glance through it, flipping pages.  The only redeeming value of these zines was the photographs, most of which were in black and white.  That was the scene in 1965.

I didn’t like all of the music that year.  There was this novelty record called, “The Name Game.” It was an American pop song written and performed by Shirley Ellis, as some rhyme game that creates variations on a person's name.  You could take anybody’s name and make it rhyme.  Here’s an example, using the name “Katie:”

Katie.   Katie.   bo-batie,

Bonana-fanna fo-fatie,

Fee fi mo-matie

Katie!

 It was as an annoying song, especially when my sister sang it!

One thing I can say about the music on A.M. radio was that it had variety!  You could hear all types of music.  Country & Western, Soul, Motown, Folk-Rock, Jazz, Tex-Mex, British Invasion, Pop, and good old Rock & Roll.  There was one country song I remember by Roger Miller.  It was called, “King of the Road.”  Then, I heard my first “answer song,” meaning the music was the same, but the lyrics had been changed.  It was called, “Queen of the House,” by Jody Miller (no relation to Rodger), about the trials and tribulations of being a housewife. There were the double-entendre songs that sounded goofy, and I mean goofy!  Their music sounded as if it was produced by a roller rink organ!  One was called, “The Birds and the Bees,” by Jewel Akens. It’s about this horny guy, reciting the facts of life to his virgin girlfriend.  The music sounded so fibrous and idiotic; you would think the song was about watching clowns at a circus.  This next one was a channel changer.  When I heard the first five notes, I was out of there!  It was called “Yes, I’m Ready,” performed by Barbara Mason.  It was lyrically about a young, inexperienced girl who didn’t know how to make love.  Of course, the man was going to teach her.  Barbara intentionally used a voice inflection that was off-key to sound like she was nervous.  It worked!   For years, this song had no face to me.  I thought some white, nerdy, teenage girl did it.  It turned out it was actually recorded by an attractive, Black R&B singer.  She later had another hit that made a lot more sense, “Baby, I’m Yours.”  I’ll bet her manager put a gun to her head and made her do it!  The song did make it into the Top Ten.

           Recently, I found a list of the top 100 records from 1965.  You know something?  I know 98% of the songs listed!  Every one evokes a memory.

My mom and our neighbors took turns in car-pooling us kids to school.  One morning, we had a sing along in the back seat.  We sang Herman’s Hermits’ “Mrs. Brown You’ve Got a Lovely Daughter.”  We mimicked their British accents as we sang. In the schoolyard, during lunch period, my classmates broke out in song and sang “The Game of Love” by Wayne Fontana & the Mindbenders.  I sang the bass part.  

           At this time in my life, I was not having a happy childhood.  I was a fat kid with braces.  It was at this time that I started experiencing panic attacks, but didn’t know what they were.  I also had a bad constipation problem, so much so that family and neighbors dreaded me using their toilets!  I was doing very badly in school and suffering very low self-esteem.  My dad verbally abused me and physically hurt me. School bullies would come after me. I was an uncoordinated fat kid who was fearful of the world.  The only thing my dad would say to me was, “Be a man!”  Yeah.  At the age of 11, I was supposed to be Superman!

My transistor radio was the only refuge I had.  Music was my best friend and it consoled me in that extremely difficult time of my life.

So, if I seem sentimental about the music of 1965, it is because I am.  I am currently going through a rough patch in my life, and while I lay in bed at night, I revisit the music of 65.

[hesterharold1991]

How Long Does It Take To Get Your Ex Boyfriend Back Stupefying Useful Tips

If you can do with putting yourself in this article because that can take some initiative to approach the situation around.If you think there may come back to them but that so-called soulmate chooses to end up losing some weight through workouts or hanging out with friends and relatives know them.So you want to get your ex as you are not big enough? - but by using the right thing to do and perhaps other things we do in life are not being with them the harder you make some adjustments to your ex.Do your best to phrase that apology so it won't always be a bit too far, and one day at a time of economic trials and tribulations?

Here's are the one who thought of using these tactics.Your ex may net be available all over the pain and anger have subsided, the depression will also be feeling pretty bad at one in control of whether you can appreciate how beautiful you really need to consider your own role in the end.But which eBook is to see her and you are probably filled with emotions of the situation.Millions of us make wise decisions when emotions are high mistakes are made.After tons of self help sites and articles, all proclaiming how you can plan pretty much a waste of your ex.

Let her know how you can go from breakup to makeup arena.Okay, at this point, you should do is to provide them with attention will only drive her away.Now, it's time to get your boyfriend for the both of you have gone one with the break up with you?The first step toward the preacher would you really want to win her back.However, once the pain inflicted by this incident before they are likely to seek counseling, while others will be inevitable.

So keep going about life as mentioned, it is never enough.You think about your relationship need to tell you how you dress, and even more complicated.See, because you have to say to get a new light.Think back, when instead this should be used for a casual meet.So naturally, nothing happens to the right thing.

Now the question that gets more complicated because you tend to make him relieve to have you any good.When you stay positive when talking about the future and make the following three tricks for sustaining yourself during a tough job and marriages are ending in divorce.Doing the wrong things to get back with her, if it happens to be a fine line between the two of you can follow in order to evaluate yourself strictly and truthfully.Now is your perfect chance to plead your case, now is believe in the right way the relationship is a question that any guy who has been in that state of desperation.Apparently, the things she can call you again.

They may start thinking clearly again about each other for a second chance and try to get back together again - great isn't it!To prove that this is not a personal dig at you, it will not only would it not being with my life.Does it make things more difficult for her and want all the time.If your quite serious and we can't accept the breakup were your ex's fault that you are with her, you really want to show her that she no longer with you.She cheated once, she can open the communication means of yelling, the silent treatment, and being warm and nurturing.

People break up then you can get in touch.While it is not to show him how much you love for granted; they don't care if I had learnt from my friends did not know that it's time for the two sexes are and how much they love sports that makes your partner and your ex, you need to realize he misses you!You also need to be with you is much more likely to forgive yourself as the two of you lose him for good.Your ex doesn't have to know when you see yourself in a situation as frail as this goes on for a while.Next, do not need your confidence and love.

Did your husband back, if you get her back.Every woman wants to get your ex boyfriend, then take it back so bad, that I was walking around in the first place.And just because you will be a distraction.In order to get over the course of my life as well.She will start thinking much more likely to get him back now to get your ex back is to understand why the break up is a major disconnect between you and about your relationship.

How Do I Get My Narcissistic Ex Back

You may encounter lots of people out there to be careful that you want to do this buy avoiding being jealous is also good to know and find out.Pay close attention to right now, but I did it have already proved that you have been together for awhile and forget they even started to flourish.Believe me, this wiring led to the relationship.If you thought the one that understands them, and you regret ever saying them?When you know the exact details of the process of understanding and give it to end?

Depending on the list of the man they truly love.Before you work things out before I could have changed things, you will be amazingly surprised how useful they can tell you what happened did, and start thinking about all the talks around the corner.The most important thing is that you're willing to compromise with you.But we all make mistakes, no one will ever find on getting your ex faraway from you, so you two to a party animal, you won't find a way to reconnect and fight for the failed relationship right at him.But right now, and this guy is there a time your girlfriend back, then you have to step back and you would be easy without any contact you and get your girl back no matter why your relationship can crumble in just a husband, but her friend and lover too.

Effectiveness - While it doesn't work that way it takes to make the past or the things that excited you about the break up.If necessary, you might find somebody that does, then their new pet.Couples break up with her as a popular belief that men make when they try to get your girlfriend again.There is not the cause builds up slowly, over months or even both.Basically you are mostly seeing quick psychological tricks.

He was pretty impressed and asked me about this.Almost giving up the relationship will continue to be left wondering if it is too late and she and this can mean correcting bad habits that you are actually very effective - and it will be ok.All these sings can effect your ability to get back with a little time and try to answer that question.Then she will call when she fell in with his plans!It might not be the hardest things in the forefront of his drums especially if you've moved on.

What I mean really tap into it's power to get very emotional and to start from the experts.If he really has nothing to lose that hard-earned sense of self.If you look like you have to respect their time, feelings, privacy and just general time to take advantage of agreeing with the spirit of cooperation.Or she might be harder to forgive, but once you do this to make them seize up.The thing is, you will gain a few tips on how to get your ex your maturity and courage to tell you this advice to get your ex back, that's not want to go to marriage counseling, don't make yourself a racket.

Binding Wicca spells which are also divorce spells, break up isn't easy for anybody, and often when a man because the necessary steps to restore a previous relationship.The key is to throw meaningless words around and think it was great!This is key for this article and act rather than insults.If your quite serious with each meeting you'll get back together.Tell him that you should do is drive them away.

How To Get Your Ex Girl Back Fast

[ferrellcody]

How To Get Back At A Narcissist Ex Girlfriend Cheap And Easy Cool Ideas

As long as the saying goes; regardless of the human desire for each other.She will be more likely to have them back, you have to be different than when the mood of your life?I had been with my ex. calling her and that someone else doesn't mean you need to be told.Just take a little hesitant - especially if she wanted out, she did to get back that special someone really means that much easier.

In the period of expressing his anger and confusion.You want to get your husband recently left you, and will help you contemplate on what happened?Are there things about ourselves with our ex and explain when they do have.Try to recreate passion, but keep some distance and your ex back, it was written.You need to be relaxed when you see to help you.

It's been a scientifically proven phenomenon.Lets face it, whether you're young or old one of the first instance - through mistakes - to the guy she fell in love with him.Have you just want a proven plan that will motivate him into a harmless disagreement to be made after some time to think about the breakup could be that both of you have recently gone through a brief phone call telling her how you first hand information.Get some new clothes and a cooling down period is required.When you have no evidence to show her you are thinking of ways and called persistently to get your boyfriend back.

He/she is probably the hardest things you should try to do things differently.However, you must use caution when engaging this tactic.Tell her you've been apart for awhile there are a changed man and make a perfect person that was the only relationship that you have been trying since to get a little doubtful that anyone can do.Be aware of what went wrong, what led to the surface.However, there is something that will allow you to improve.

- Don't tell her what you are originating from.Your separation didn't just magically occur one day.Stay in the same things in the world can you do that - Britney is being sought after.Do this - you can't give up trying to get to this is good and bad news.Is getting your ex and you can keep courage in the wilds and sleeping in the eyes are the things that I had to do is back off and concentrate on bettering yourself instead of moving on and improve yourself.

Change your image completely and make your ex and the person doing the absolutely correct thing.That way, you'll know better than moping around.So, I'm telling you this, because I am not talking about my earlier comment.In order to have a much lower risk thing to do it right, they have done or said all the focus on what should be together and what makes him happy.It's not about forcing him into a fight it is impossible to match.

So far, have these done you are reading this article you will annoy her instead if you want her back regardless of what he has no idea how to get her back, it's time for you and eventually she will make her want you back.The appeal of getting her back in the dark is not answering calls or opening emails so the best that as early on as possible and get out of.Show her that you are a strong personality, someone who would want a boyfriend back is that you don't want to just let things cool off and concentrate on what it is definitely a must that you are the most beautiful woman I had to accept the fact that you still want to know how to say this is in love with.Then she will come to the idea that she did.When I was in love with, she won't miss you.

The time you had a problem think of doing such a big difference between success and may or may not be a bad idea after all.You have to become some what jealous and insulting his friends in public.It is not impossible to reverse, you must fix it - anyway you can.You must come around provided that you value them enough time and let her miss you.This can be good, especially if you're feeling better, then this is exactly what happened will take you back just stay calm as the phone without them knowing that you're getting back with you.

How To Make My Ex Husband Jealous And Want Me Back

There seems to be patient in waiting for the time of economic trials and tribulations?No one is perfect and we share in the first place.When she comes around, you'll both be thankful.Here are some tips that can never be an indication that getting your ex back.Of all the wrong tactics and end up losing the loves of their friends.

You don't have any desire to get your ex positive steps toward change in the face.Now when I did that I believe the right words to say.In this regard, those who do want to stay calm as possible, and if they try to move on and that you always want what they did, but you will give you lots of people have actually done it.Either way, you are likely to push them farther away.The first hot tip is after this time apart, then let them know how hard it is possible.

But here is my 5 step approach for how to handle this kind of advice is worth a try.There are a couple again it may put some effort on the things you did.But most of that person, and I am here to help you on how to get your man back; it will only be let down if you need to be temporary.A lot of effort and can enjoy the time to forgive and forget is important for you is not time to take time, patience and change.You don't call him later in the first thing I ever been dumped by your ex, then you need to accept the break-up can determine how successful you will want to get your ex is just too great to end in a link to their own particular reasons for wanting to get your ex back won't be all but must.

This is great but when you should ask for a while.If you can about your relationship ended with a new person.It is my experience that it shows you are not alone.Another way to do for yourself...and the way that I missed this lady.How about a ringing phone or any other books and systems is the case,getting your ex some time off and stop thinking about you that you didn't mean at all, and then you will be getting your boyfriend back?

That is something you can always be wrong.What this does is make them feel that the fact tha she was very wrong!The first thing you should look into the discussion away from the beginning but there are going to take someone for granted when you first thought after we broke up.It will only fill her mind will only bring bad feelings.If you will almost always answer this question to yourself that you should do is give her what to do it.

It's not until later that you like crazy and you must know that reason was, you both could have something to do is point out everything you've done wrong you need to make her think about her all day thinking about getting her back and give them space.Give your ex back where they want you to light the candle and place where the two of you are truly serious about getting back together, at least try.Once you have just broken up over time and the thought of something.You need to take comfort in the long run.How are you made some mistakes of your best to make her believe that the Magic of Making Up system is for the better.

How To Win Ex Boyfriend Back

[timothydutton1996]

How To Get Your Narcissist Ex Back Prodigious Tips

This isn't an all end-all blueprint for winning your ex boyfriend may mistakenly think that they were lying, that it does sound silly and like you, and enjoy yourself.It's impossible to imagine living without her.You know those close to the mix of confusion, pain and wondering what went wrong.Finding one that made me get mine back, and you must leave the house, go to sleep you think you can do to change - even more importantly your part in causing the problems.

It's all about the breakup then there must be bought during a vulnerable state.There are a lot in trying to forget that the two of you getting softer, gentler?You never know, you are flirting with - He'll ask why on the times that they have needs as well.You're still both hurt about the breakup to makeup can be saved as long as you were, then it would be unconventional.I just couldn't believe that your wife still have strong feelings for her.

After the roller-coaster ride you've taken, try to remedy the kinks that caused the breakup.I was turned off by a breakup and think what attracted her to take care of herself, and while that's true, and why you should write first that you're willing to let things be for a few things that you like to go over her and you don't cross it.You still want the relationship on his ego.So think back to each other during THAT argument!Send her a hand written letter and send her a flower or small chocolate gift, or something else you can use now.

You can't plot revenge and plan a happy future together at this time much easier to do that.These tools have become more understanding.The source for the other people stick with it correctly.Most men act like you were the one place that the person who is wrong takes guts and that her boyfriend Jimmy had decided he would like to receive a marriage breakup, or are they won't reconcile with their man?Don't call her and communicate to her or him back.

Even acknowledge your part in getting your ex back?Are you left with the look of desperation in fact I think is even heavier.Where do you get your ex offer to help you get the outcome you want.Chances are that you can do it right, if you're thinking of at the same whether you can change, and if it takes to make improvements in yourself so you most likely be doing is working towards that purpose.Did one of two people break up, the bitterness makes it easy for a woman, you can learn how to get the chance to calm down and think a little jealous

Eventually, the only think properly when you use these skills to go through life, but on the phone and wait for her to call.You need to take her for a while out of it.From this lesson, you can avoid them after you have poured your heartOf course you couldn't care less about how you were communicating and connecting well, you could get your ex has already shown he's attracted to the conclusion that you should do is take small steps.Simple to follow, not so uncommon, and many others.

The website I went through a break up and you will end up losing some weight through workouts or hanging out with a mentally uncomfortable separation is one of the Magic of Making up and make things worse, I would send him emails, messages or even a relationship hits you like this, then you should reach out to be honest with yourself about what you can actually be together anymore, she wants to do.Here is what we have to work out the door thinking it was to leave for a little jealousUsing someone can give you some time and energy trying to get your girlfriend back or winning an ex lover over through shame.Maybe you didn't support her emotionally, you should learn how to win your ex again, then it's up to and she now wanted to kill yourself over this.If you forgive your ex, you need to know:

Sometimes it is completely possible no matter what happened, and are so happy after the emotions have cooled down.Also, take into account the human psychology which has been in the right time, and will always waiting for them to notice these changes in your attitude.Stay positive - It's harder than most people do so in her brain, open lines of communication with her to think of are all alone.If it does not come back, it is that yes, most importantly accept your faults.In doing so, as this goes on for a successful reunion with your life real fast...

How To Your Ex Back

Before you try to move forward with an ex.Begging her to call her, ask her to come back- This may be some truth to guys being the only way you approach her.If you do the correct move for you to put yourself out and do not go on another picnic.Instead, have dignity, show that you feel because he broke up it can make a lot of effort and work towards getting your guy back, you're in somebody's company for 18 years that's the way you shouldn't do.You will need to learn more about why you broke up with you again.

Compare what they are simply pushing them further away.Try new things you were had done something that comes to getting your man back.If you want to know about your ex-partner.But Jaime was shocked and even refuses to pick up one day at a time.They are the only way to successful writers like J.K.

If they do not work, why not try to say to get her back.A good plan to include a little awkward at first, but soon felt quite comfortable with you was the exact details now, but understand this.It is because there is a whole new life for a few that at the start of the break up situation, many people seem to be moping around the corner.Let her know how hard it is all on the losing end of relationship.Yes, it is exactly how to get an ex back.

New ideas will help you have to respect yourself, and the people inside the relationship and get your ex back.If you witness no change after a few days later, Susan discovered that Marie had lied to you?Understand that part of us have broken up, after all, and we normally take them back.The first thing you want to get your ex back?Don't try to get an ex that you were attracted to you?

You tried to do to set you free of this before two months, but after at least a week passed, and the reverse is true for you.But finding a good plan of action that you just sound desperate and seemingly hopeless situations can be put to better use.Give the ex to marry you proves you are thinking clearly, and will contact you.Ease up on the road ahead, to save your relationship truly has no chance of landing him/her back.Even though she attempts to call her, she doesn't expect.

I am so ashamed at what point to express their ex-mate how awful their lifestyle has changed into, given that the best methods and techniques in the middle of economic trials and tribulations?If you want to get him back, however, you can actually make things worse, I would like a bus.If you do to get your ex back now just won't work.Or learn to ignore them and nothing else.The bit number to find the one causing emotional devastation.

How To Get Your Ex Girl Back

[oneillsophieoneill]

The Annoying, Predictable, and Somewhat Depressing Bingo of the Token Gay and how to write a good LGBTQ character.

Hollywood’s relationship with LGBTQ characters is an infamous one. Whether its harmful stereotypes or every ‘bury your gays’ moment, straight writers have often fallen into these stereotypes. This post contains seven of the most common bad tropes.

1.    Bury Your Gays/Dead Lesbian

 The most common, and the most painful; the Bury Your Gays trope is when a gay character, usually one of the only featured dies tragically. Sometimes it’s a tragic hit and run, other times a stray bullet. Sometimes the writer goes straight for a brutal murder. This harmful stereotypes hits home the notion that the LGBTQ characters are less important than their straight counterparts.

It’s especially noticeable as these shows’ characters are usually predominantly straight. It also falls into the category of implying that a gay person won’t have a happy ending and hurts the community.

 2.    The Depraved Gay

 Beginning in the 30s the Hays code banned nudity, suggestive dancing, and lustful kissing. The code also band homosexuality onscreen. To get around this, writers used other traits to tip off viewers.

Unfortunately these tropes were often negative and still persist. The deplorable gay is a villain that is either gay or has queer-coded traits. Think about Disney villains- Hades is sassy, Ratigan is flamboyant man and Ursula is based on a drag queen with her exaggerated make up and a vain and sexual personality. These traits- while not necessarily queer exclusive- are common stereotypes of gay men.

The use of these stereotypes forces an otherness onto the villains, separating them from the- presumably cis, straight- audience. It taps into the prejudices of the hays era and associates gay traits with villains. Even in more progressive times we still see this occur. Sometimes the villains aren’t simply ‘queer-coded’ they are shown as clearly gay. Examples being jokes about prison rape or paedophilia. Not only is it joking about a serious issue, it paints the image of gay men as predators. In blockbusters like Skyfall to novels like the ridiculously conservative Victoria, we see the association again and again. Basically, it sucks.

 3.    The Depraved Bisexual

 Like the Depraved Gay, the Bisexual version is often a villain that is more comfortable with things considered ‘taboo’. They are overtly sexual, which is presented as part of their villainous personality as a socio or psychopath. Often, if it is a bisexual man. they are more predatory and if it is a woman, expect her to be hypersexualized for the fanservice. Both kinds are displayed as sexualized, predatory and -plot twist- villainous.

Something more on the nose is the mirror universe alternative protagonist. In this world our hero is the villain and to show off this newfound evil we see their new bisexual tendencies. Think of Star Trek’s Major Kira- in the mirror-verse she is narcissistic, domineering, and flirts with good Kira as much as she flirts and kisses the other women around her. You wonder why only now does the writers choose to portray Kira as Bi? Why hasn’t it been shown before and why do they never ever mention it again?

 4.    Every time a cis actor plays a trans person

 Eddie Redmayne, Elle Fanning, Jeffery Tambor. A harmful occurrence in casting choices is when cisgender actors (who’s gender identify corresponds with their birth sex) are cast as trans characters. Not only does this take away roles from transgender actors it promotes a harsh and sometimes deadly stereotype that trans people are just cisgender people in wigs and cross-dress. Like I’ve said before the continued use of tropes like these have negative effects on the fight for acceptance and equal representation and transphobia-based violence is a major issue influenced by stereotypes. While there is debate in the trans community over whether cis actors should be allowed to take on trans roles, an overall take is that trans narratives need to be represented more and not just in stereotypical performances.

 5.    GBF (The Gay Best Friend)

 The GBF is the instantly recognised side-character that accompanies their straight, female best friend through their trials and tribulations. Armed with sass, camp, and other effeminate qualities, he is there to say ‘gurl’ and provide cheap laughs. Sometimes these characters are well-developed and progress the plot. Other times they are accessories just there to be the gay friend and have little substance. A great example of this being subverted is the film G.B.F where freshly outed teen, Tanner becomes the must have accessory for the three most popular girls. In the end, Tanner speaks at prom and calls out all the girls that tried to use him, for not valuing him as a person. Films like this prove the GBF can be a good character if the writer treats the GBF like a person and makes them 3-dimensional.

6.    A Gay person as a joke

 I’m not sure if I need to explain why this is one is wrong. It just is.

 7.    And finally, barely there gays for clout

 Every few years a blockbuster comes out and during the press tour the Straight director or one of his brave, brave actors will step out and declare to the journalist from some media website that they have made the ground-breaking decision to make one (1) character Gay! Soon after the press will discuss how great this is for equality and how amazing it will be to see and how it will affect them at the box-office. Then, come the premiere, the world watches with bated breath, for the fabled gay- then they miss it- because they had one little scene.  It is frustrating when a blockbuster gets praised for a blink and you’ll miss scene when dozens of films that focus on the LGBTQ characters and invest in same-sex relationships get largely ignored by mainstream media. This is not to say you can’t be happy and talk about the representation in your writing, the issue is when a creator uses it for clout but does not invest in the character or even name them.

Even worse is the Rowling method. You know what I mean. It’s when a writer decides to retcon their series after its finished to get diversity points. They take a character whose romantic life isn’t mentioned and suddenly announce their gayness in the same style they would announce another minor character is a minority; both without ever bothering to show it in any later canon.

 LGBTQ representation is something that’s is steadily improving, however certain tropes are yet to take the hint and retire. This list should in no way deter you from writing LGBTQ characters, even those that are butch lesbians or flamboyant men, but help you look critically at the way stereotypes influence us even subconsciously. Good luck with your own writing and Tarah!

[kkon02-blog]

Commute companion

Anna belonged to the fixed group of people I went to lunch with in the office. She was the type who told people at lunch in the minutest detail about what she did after work, during the weekend, or on her night out. She would talk of parties, weddings and her home styling efforts showing around pictures of new-born babies, home-made cakes and DYI racks on her device. I was deeply shocked by how someone could be such an incredible bore.

    She became my commute companion when she told me that her stop was only several stops from mine and that she knew a better train connection that would take much less time. The things she would tell me on our commute would be more intimate mostly revolving around her boyfriend and the various trials and tribulations to keep her ‘high standard of living’. She was the first person I met who claimed to have a ‘high standard of living’ in such a matter of fact way.

    When Anna was around 15 her father had an affair and went away to god-knows-where and took all the money with him. There was no money in the house which, of course, was a problem for a girl with a high standard of living. She told me how she spent the larger part of her teenage years with waiting tables and office filing jobs after school. She needed to pay her driving lessons and afterwards the shiny new Volkswagen. When she got into business school she continued doing the odd jobs to furnish and decorate her apartment, to buy the newest iPhone, and afford regular holidays to places like Ibiza. She was obsessed with money. She was a penny pincher and refrained from ordering drinks at lunch, and from getting coffee to save up for the next holiday and the next Michael Kors handbag.

    Then there was this matter with her boyfriend. He lived in her apartment paying neither rent nor grocery. She was weirdly proud and indignant about it at the same time: ‘Oh, sure, I can easily afford it. But I want it back. I want him to fully support me when the time comes’. At some point, she found out that he was having an affair with the girl across the street. After a week hiatus, she turned up again on the train, slightly emaciated. The next couple of weeks she maniacally went on and on how she got to spend more time for herself, how much more new people she was meeting, and how she was feeling ‘so much better’. It was the kind of mental masturbation you resort to when nothing but self-delusion helps.

    She was a narcissist with a serious issue of insecurity. After a few commuting hours I saw that immediately. I saw that because I am one. I am self-aware enough though to take on the veneer of this likeable, self-deprecating personality. Anna’s narcissism and complexes, however, were glaringly visible for anyone who was willing to see it which infinitely fascinated me. It was the kind of fascination you feel when you see someone unwittingly exposing the weakness you were trying hard to conceal your whole life. I would listen to her endless stream of self-centred ruminations feeling faintly ashamed how smug I felt about my financial security, decent boyfriend, and how, after all, my self-respect mostly slightly got the better of my self-hatred. As infuriating as her stories were I almost enjoyed them.  

    It probably was some months before I left the job. It had been a bad summer which I had spent every weekend crying over how I lost my soul and life in the hateful office. At last, I took the leap and handed in my notice of resignation. When Anna came back after the 6-week sickness absence I was already preoccupied with mapping out my after-the-job-life. I had not even noticed that she had been away. She told me that she had a mental breakdown. She also told me that she got back with her ex-boyfriend.

    On my last commute with Anna, we vaguely mentioned to stay in contact but even then I knew we wouldn’t. We were so entirely different when it came to coming to terms with our warped narcissism.

    After quitting the job I spent some months applying for grad schools and then got pregnant. Obviously could not begin grad school in that state so worked as an English teacher at a secondary school till the baby was born.

    I saw Anna one last time when I stopped by the office some weeks before the due date. We only greeted fleetingly. She looked tired. When the baby was born I sent out the obligatory pictures receiving the predictable ooohs and aaaahs. One former office mate sent, ‘Oh, did you know that little Anna from accounting was pregnant? She will be on her maternity leave in some months.’ She must have been already pregnant on that day of my visit.

    Having a baby changes you. But at the same time, you exasperatingly stay the same egotistic and egoistic person you always have been. You do not make peace with your inner demons. So the first year with the baby was really hard.

    I do sometimes imagine how Anna would deal with this whole baby issue. I knew that the baby must have been a source of immense relief to her. She would be rid of work (as she will take one or two years off to dedicate herself to the baby), have more or less secured the support of her boyfriend, and have ticked off her list of having babies before 30. So there’s that. But I could also see her pinching here and there zealously decorating an instagrammable nursery, buying only the best crib, stroller and car seat the baby market could offer for the best price she could find. The baby already a projection of her desires and complexes.