#once we’d done that growing already

[reflectionsofgalaxies]

god fucking damnit

[mattybsgroupie]

sleepover | matt sturniolo

contents: established relationship; handjob (m receiving); thigh riding (f); p in v; creampie; mommy kink; sub!matt

- ♡ -

notes: i wrote two dom!matt fics in a row i do not recognize myself. back to the sub!matt agenda, somebody has got to do it, i am the chosen one!!! (please it’s a trump meme) this is a silly little one i wrote cuz i’ve been dreaming some weird things these last few days and i’d very much like to fuck matt afterwards. not proofread but hope you enjoy it. always so thankful for every like, comment, reblog and follow, love y’all sm ♡ btw next week i might post a chris request i got idkkk

- ♡ -

i woke up out of breath, sweat dripping from my forehead as i tried to calm down. it was a nightmare - a terrible one, where i no longer had matt and no matter how much i’d scream, my voice wouldn’t come out. my phone buzzed, the screen lighting up the ceiling and part of my room. it was 3am.

i reached for the nightstand, first taking a sip of water and then grabbing my cellphone, checking my notifications. i had one missed call from matt and two other messages, which only read “babe, you up?”

i felt as the weight of the world had been lifted off my shoulders, my chest gradually lowering as i got more relaxed. i smiled and speed dialed the first number on my list.

“why are you awake!” matt picked up in a surprised tone, not really waiting for my answer. “i just texted you, did you feel it coming or something?” he giggled.

“hi, babe” i said, my voice still shaky. “i just woke up, actually”

“what happened?” matt asked me once again, clearly concerned as he heard how i sounded. i gulped and gave a few taps on my chest as i rested my back on the headboard. “what is it, hm? bad dream?”

“uhum” i nodded, even though he couldn’t see me. he knew i’d soon be curled up between the sheets, trying to fall asleep again. “what about you babe? can't sleep?” i asked, already knowing the response.

matt sighed and i could picture him running his fingers through his hair, trying to not upset me “anxious”.

“i’m sorry to hear that, matty” i pouted from the other side of the screen. “do you wanna facetime?” i suggested what we had done plenty of times. we’d be facing each other, talking nonsense until one of us fall asleep - of course, when things didn’t take a turn to either matt’s or my own horniness.

“actually… was thinking about coming over” i smiled, but he couldn’t see it. he always made me feel like a teenage girl, changing the reason of my nervousness to something silly, like him coming over.

“no way, you’re not getting the road right now” i said, playing hard to get.

“what?” matt sounded confused. “why not?!”

“it’s late and i worry about you” i responded. “don’t you have something schedule for tomorrow?”

“i don’t give a fuck” matt said, “i wanna be with you right now, do you wanna be with me?” i nodded and as if he could see me from there, he continued. “please, mommy?”

“i’m waiting!” i jokingly hang up on him after gasping by the nickname, as if it was too bold of him to call me that.

- ♡ -

i heard three knocks on my bedroom door and didn’t bother getting up. i rolled myself on the bed, waiting for him to join me.

“did i take too long?” matt asked, biggest smile on his face. he locked the door and quickly came next to me, lying down by my side.

“yeah, you know mommy doesn’t like to wait” matt widened his eyes, gulping at my words, realizing what he had done over the phone.

“i just said that so you could let me come over” he said, acting tough as he rolled his eyes before resting his head above my chest, snuggling into me.

“oh, that’s too bad” i pouted, my fingers running through his hair. “you got me all worked up…”

matt quickly raised his head, blue eyes staring at me in surprise, grin growing on his face. “did i? really?”

“of course, my good boy always gets me going” i teased, matt’s cheeks turning red. “why? you came here to sleep?”

“i mean” he started, grabbing my waist, turning my body over and changing our positions. he was now under me, his hands resting on my hips while i adjusted myself in order to get comfortable on his lap. “not anymore”.

matt leaned in for a kiss, holding the back of my head and bringing us closer. i could feel his beard slightly tickling my face as he deepened the pressure of his lips against mine, silently asking to go further by sticking his tongue and teasing me. i opened my mouth and matt’s tongue quickly slid in, the wet sounds taking over my darkened room.

one of matt's hand moved to my breasts, massaging it over the shirt. i gasped for the sudden contact, pulling away from the kiss, which led him to go to my neck instead. he trailed his lips down, altering between biting and licking my skin. my hands went to his hair once again, tangling my fingers on his curls.

matt lowered his head and stopped right above my nipple before looking at me with needy puppy eyes. i nodded vigorously, but instead of removing my shirt, matt hid his face underneath it, streching the cloth in order to fit inside. i felt his wet tongue teasing my nub and since i could no longer pull his hair, i rested my hands on his bare thighs. as matt started to swril his tongue, i threw my head back and couldn't help but start to move my hips forward, trying to get some friction to my already wet pussy.

i let out a moan when his free went to my other boob, his thumb circling the hardened nub that poked through the shirt. i wanted to look at him - wanted to see how his beard looked like rubbing against my skin, which color the hickeys he left would be, how much would the saliva run down my torso.

with my eyes closed and feeling matt sucking my tits, i tried to touch the hem of my shirt in order to remove it, i couldn't stand one more second without looking at his eyes again - however, my palm met something harder, covered by a soft fabric. i groped his shaft and received a muffled moan from matt, still busy in my tits. now with my eyes open i could finally take my clothes off, revealing matt with his messy hair, beard wet from rubbing his face against his own kisses, lips swollen.

“look at me baby” i called and carressed his cheek, “you said you wanted to sleepover and now look at you, already a mess for mommy...”

“i'm s-sorry, mommy” he started, “can't help it, you taste so good”.

“yeah? did you miss me?” i teased, starting to drag myself over his thigh once again. “we saw each other two days ago”

“it's too much” matt complained, hands going to my hips, helping me set a proper pace. “needy again”, he glanced at tent on his shorts, where my palm rested.

“is mommy's baby needy?” i almost mocked him and he nodded pathetically, but still not letting me take full control as he started to pump his legs' muscles, making my pussy clench. i opened my mouth, but nothing came out of it. matt's grip tighetned and he forced my body down, completely leading my movements.

“mommy seems needy as well” matt spoke, smashing his lips against mine. i let out a frustrated whine, wanting to feel more - i needed him inside of me. “aren't you?”

“yes- fuck” i said, trying to come back to my senses regain control of the situation “babe, be a good boy for me hm?"”

when i finally stroked matt's boner, his hands rapdly went to my ass, both palms groping it harshly as i entered inside his pants. i wrapped my fingers around his aching cock, and being the good boy he was, matt lifted up his hips, allowing me to pull down his shorts and reveal his hardened dick. he touched my waistband in response, silently asking if he could do the same to me. i mimicked his moves, letting the fabric slide down my legs.

“thought i had told you to not wear panties to bed” he said, pulling the strings of my underwear. “isn't mommy supposed to be good as well?” matt was driving me crazy with all the teasing.

i suddenly started to move my fist up and down, quickly jerking him off. matt was used with me starting slow and building up his excitement until he climaxed. but tonight, it didn't seem like he wanted to be treated kindly. matt threw his head back and closed his eyes, groaning loudly “f-fuck!”

i brushed my thumb over his tip, matt’s body immediately reacting, jointing his hips forward into my fist. i dragged my finger on his slit as matt’s nails dig into my skin, spreading the pre-cum down his shaft. his breathing got heavier, chest rising and falling quickly while he bit every inch of skin he could reach.

“not talking back anymore?” i asked, gradually stopping my motions, receiving a groan in response.

“mommy, don’t be mean” he pleaded as his sneaky fingers made their way to my entrance, pulling my panties to the side. he kissed my neck, making my eyes roll as i melted into his touch.

“matthew” i caught his attention since i didn’t really use his full name often. “stopping teasing so fucking much and just fucking say it”. he widened his eyes before letting the grin grow wide on his face.

“please, please, please” he said, “ride me, momma”i immediately got out of his thigh, adjusting myself to be in between his legs. i could feel matt’s cock being lazily dragged against my now bare pussy, panties removed as soon as i got up.

i lowered myself on his shaft, nearing my throbbing cunt to his leaking tip. both of my hands went to matt’s shoulders, looking for balance as his grabbed my hips, helping me fully sit on his length. matt’s dick was huge, stretching my walls as he hid his face on the crook of my neck, tickling beard making me giggle as i tried to adjust myself to his size.

“wasn’t so hard, was it?” i asked, getting comfortable to move my hips up. as i started riding, matt wouldn’t say a word, only muffling moans in my ear. he denied with his head, whining as i fastened my pace.

“c-close” he said, gripping tighter. “mommy- fuck”

“hold for me baby” i spoke, already out of breath, bouncing harder on his dick. matt decided to stick his face on my boobs and dragged his tongue along my skin, biting my nipple and holding me by my waist, jointing his hips forward in order to reach his high quicker.

“yes baby, just like that” i praised, matt now pounding mindlessly into me. “good boy, good boy” and that’s what took for him to snap, groaning loudly as his cock twitched and he released the knot on his lower belly, spurts of his warm cum filling my insides.

his spasms brought me closer to the edge, but i wouldn’t stop riding him. i kept on bouncing on his cock, now in search of my own climax. “mommy- mommy, fuck!” matt cried from the overstimulation. his whimpers got louder and so did my moans as my orgasm washed over me, mouth hanging open with my trembling body as i came over matt’s shaft.

i was too tired to remove myself, letting my weight fall over him. matt rolled us over, both of us laying in my bed. he turned to the side and pulled out, the mix of our realeases running down my legs and staining my sheets. matt let out a chuckle as he wrapped his arms around me, bringing me closer to his chest.

“should we sleep now?” i asked, running my fingers through his tummy.

“kid” he called, pointing to my bedroom widow. “the sun is already up” he spoke - as if this was gonna stop us from sleeping till noon. “but that’s why i came here, right? sleepover”

“of course, you’re always so clever” i rolled my eyes and giggled, allowing my body to relax next to his. i closed my eyes and knew that, while matt was around, the bad dreams would no longer come.

- ♡ -

taglist (drop a 🌸!): @thepubeburgler @submattenthusiast @pearlzier @mattsfavbitchhh @her-favorite @bugeyedgrl @mattswhore-44 @sturncakez @riowritesitall @joemamaaa42069 @mattttypooh @sturnsmia @sturnthepot

[stararch4ngelqueen]

just need soft sex with jason

May have gotten a little carried away but ✨🔨🫠

—

Time written - 12:23 p.m

“I think I can walk just fine, Jason.”

Jason’s tone in response is lighthearted, playful even.

“It’s romantic, don’t you think? Carrying your girl to bed—” he pauses and chuckles at your expression, catching view of that eye roll while sipping your drink.

“We’d be like that painting of the angel holding a bride,” he suggests with a wide smile. “C’mon, not the first time I’ve done it.”

“Oh my god,” you giggle, tilting your head back in exaggeration. “Wow, look at you trying to be all cute and chivalrous.”

“Hey, let’s not downplay it. I thought I was being the most romantic guy ever,” he pouts, his expression turning faux-offended.

“I guess not,” he shrugs. “If you can’t appreciate that.”

He leans against the kitchen counter, acting as if he really is hurt. Then, without warning, he turns around to face you, broad hands clutching hold of you by the waist.

He hoists you up over his shoulder without hesitation, smirking from your sudden surprised yelps. He leaves your abandoned tea mugs behind, neglecting the lightswitch as he carries you down the hallway.

“I can walk Jase—!” Your amused beginning cuts off with an abrupt gasp when a firm palm smacks down on your ass, your shirt riding up over your curves.

“Can’t walk if your feet aren’t on the ground.”

“Jason!” Your annoyed tone didn’t last more than half a second before a smile breaks over your face. Chivalry was never dead with a man like him.

Your joyous fit of giggles merely died down after he gently sets you into bed, your head settling along your minor pile of unnecessarily comfortable pillows. Jason joins you without a second thought, his broad body comfortably caging you in. Any light from the hallway shadowed out once he floods your vision, enveloping you in a blanket of safety.

Then, without word, he presses his lips against yours, gently nudging your legs apart to snugly settle in between them. His breathing grows slightly rough, his braced hands grip tightly to the sheets as he feels your delicate little fingers find purchase along his back.

One of your hands trails up and down along his spine, causing the hair on his neck to flare up. He can already feel himself getting worked up, the hunger within him getting a little harder to control.

Jason spares a hand to roam along your minimally clothed body, running his palm along the soft skin of your hips and thighs.

A soft, little hum leaves your plump lips, his hand grasping along your soft, moisturized hip. The ache that bloomed in his gut desired more of those sweet noises, biting down on your tongue before rocking his hips forward.

You might’ve been just as eager as he was, your damp panties leaving a little impact against his navy sweatpants. The paired friction makes his waistband tug down, exposing the taunt v-line visible by lack of boxers.

“Jason,” you whimper out his name in the midst of him proceeding to litter your neck with kisses. He knows what you’re going to ask, he’s well aware of it. All he wanted was the green light to do it, one word to allow him this privilege.

“Yeah baby?” He murmurs against your skin, anxiously awaiting permission.

“Please.”

Such a gorgeously spoken sound, accompanied with a pretty bloom on those supple cheeks.

Jason groans as his body shivers. As much as he wants to control himself from going too fast, he wraps his arms around your legs, hoisting them up around his waist as he gives in.

With resuming where he left off, body hands running further up your body. You wore no bra to sleep, per his advantage. Pulling off the very shirt you borrowed from him to sleep in, he’s pleased with the sight of your breasts gently bouncing after momentarily sitting up.

“Oh my God,” Jason utters out in the midst of a groan, his calloused palms cradling both your sweet, glistening tits. “Mmm. Fuck, babe.”

You smelled incredibly good, like sweet honey cake dipped in melted frosting, sprinkled with toasted sugar. He’d fall asleep with his nose buried into your neck nearly every night, blessed with such a comforting fragrance off your warm body every morning.

You stuck to his memory as well as his clothes, every part of you tasting as sweet as your scent. The falsified rumors of the late Queen of France’s words held the most truth when Jason thought of eating you.

“Smell good?” You teasingly hum, biting your lip from his thumbs circling both your nipples, imagining your tiny hands in comparison to his rub luscious body butter along your chest every night after your shower.

“Smells fucking amazing.” He grunts, gently pinching both your nipples in between his fingers. Whatever smart remark you’re about to make dies in the back of your throat as Jason leans down, teasing your nipple in between his teeth. You suck in a deep breath, tangling your fingers into his messy black hair.

He’d help you take another quick shower after this, for now, all he needed was you.

Four fingers hook along your thin panties while assaulting your other nipple, your hips raising to comply with him pulling them off and down your legs.

“Oh, fuck,” Jason lowly groans from such a pretty sight greeting him from in between your legs, teal eyes heavy lidded with overpowering lust.

Jason shifts himself closer, raising your hips off the bed to rest further up along his lap. Both thumbs caress the smooth skin of your inner thighs before tracing around your puffy lips, one thumb nudging your clit before inserting two fingers into your pussy, pumping them at a slow pace.

Jason utters plenty of dirty, feverish promises as he pumps his fingers in and out at a quickening pace, his thumb moving in fast circles around your throbbing clit. He can’t wait to feel your rosy walls squeeze around him, muttering in between a handsome chuckle that your pussy is crying for it, gushing around his fingers so quickly.

Purplish plum colored hickies coat your inner shoulder as he draws a slow, modest orgasm from you, hooking his fingers with every buck of your hips, making you quiver and squeal.

Prayers composed of his name alone continuously leave your tongue, your pussy drooling as he removes his fingers, strings of arousal connecting between both digits. Chest heaving while Jason sets you back down, glazed over eyes watch his free hand tug down his constricting pants, pulling himself free from his confines.

He strokes himself with his wet fingers, further coating the tip of his fat, leaking cock with additional lubricant. He always knew you needed prep; not only wanted to, but needed to. He wasn’t being cocky (too cocky anyway) about his size, he was incredibly blunt about it when it came to the first time you had sex.

Even more so when he had been your first.

He never wanted you to hurt, even when the itch of impatience nagged at his brain to fuck you here and now.

His hand cradled the back of your head, fingers interlacing with your shower damp hair. To further stoke those flames, he parts your flushed lips with still damp fingers before shoving them in, tasting of salty precum and yourself as you run your tongue along them.

“Ohh, fucking dirty girl.” Jason mutters while watching, catching the crook in your lips form while sucking on his fingers. He takes your lips after retreating them, sucking on your tongue while lightly fucking himself with his hand, slicking up a majority of his length.

He guides himself closer, fighting back a grunt as the thick, heavy length of his cock rests across your slippery opening, sticky and sweet with arousal.

The both of you moan as he pushes inside, your walls stretching tightly around his girthy head. A low groan of satisfaction erupts from his chest while he sheaths himself in your warmth, his breath coming out hot and embarrassingly shallow through his nose.

“Fuck,” Jason mumbles before stifling a sharp whimper, fingers tightening on your hips in a death grip. “Shit, Princess. so goddamn tight.”

The heels of your feet digging into the back of his thighs, your nails drawing crescents into his skin. You want him as deep as he can possibly get, until you can’t remember where you end and he begins. The stretch is deliciously potent, a reminder that no matter how many times you do this, you’ll never fully get used to him. Neither of you would have it any other way.

He moves quite slow, rocking his hips in a speed that carries no pick up or roughness as he absolutely loses himself inside you. His lips roam all over your face, kissing away winces and mumbling soft apologies to your whimpers while you adjust.

Regardless of the pace, being stuffed full of his cock garnered pleasurable tears spewing from your eyes.

Your nails drag against his biceps, leaving raised lines along his muscles. He quietly pleads for you to dig deeper, desiring for his blood underneath your nails, wanting your marks to affect him for as long as possible.

The stinging pain has the desired effect on Jason, who spews out a sharp kiss as he thrusts into you hard once. The bed squeaks, the mattress buckling in the frame as it thuds against the wall.

A little cry leaves your mouth, your hips hitching up until your walls swallow him whole. Skin directly flush against skin, him buried so deep, kissing your cervix directly, his blunt head throbbing all against your sweet spots.

“Shhh,” Jason exhales against your cheek, both hands cradling your cheeks with eyes full of guilt from his impatient mistake.

“Shh, babe. M’sorry.” He reassuringly whispers along your lips, massaging soothing circles along your sides. “You’re alright, you’re okay. There’s my girl, my pretty girl .. takin’ me in so damn good.”

The gentle rock of his hips after a moment of rest isn’t subtle, much softer than either of you have had yet, but hot. So genuinely hot that the pure compassion between two star struck lovers almost makes up for the lack of speed. Two, aroused bodies taking in on such erotic pleasure as they made love for the first time all over again.

Jason catches your lips in a messy kiss as he plunges into you again and again, skin softly patting against damp skin.

Your lips travel along his sharp jaw, looking for the one spot by his ear that almost always makes him unravel each time. He tenses as you find it, cursing richly in your ear before grasping you closer.

“G-God fucking damn, Princess, you’re killing me,” he grunts out, growing a little louder before his voice cracks, gifting you a symphony of eagerly impatient whimpers whilst fisting handfuls of bedsheets, finally rutting into you just a little faster.

You can tell from the sloppiness that he’s close, and you’re not far behind.

You know every one of his weaknesses. Hell, you were at the top of that list, and it scared the shit out of him. Now, it makes him feel secure. And it’s in that security that he gives you everything.

His hips stutter as he fills you with thick, heavy ropes of cum, forcefully buried deeply with each staggered, drawn out thrusts. A cracked whisper of your name is all the warning he gives before flying over the edge, dragging you down with him shortly after.

You didn’t care if he finished first, all that mattered was the stark beauty of him that displayed across his face while he did it. Furrowed brows, eyes screwed shut in euphoria.

“I love you,” he chokes out, grunting heavily in your ear while hugging you against him for dear life, muscular arms slipping under your arched back, his pelvis rocking deliciously against your sensitive clit. “I love you I love you, I fucking love you—“

“I love you too,” you whimper out during a shudder, overstimulation creaking up and down your spine. You have him in a death grip, legs tangled tight around his waist, arms still tightly secure around his shoulders.

Your most favorite expression on him was the relief that followed after the euphoric tension diminished. Facial muscles melting as every inch of stress vanishes from his body, coupled with the satisfaction of doing so with the woman he so dearly loved.

His most favorite expression on you was the beautiful glimmer in your eyes after opening his. Gorgeous irises full of crystalline tears, tinted pink with satisfaction and awe of doing so with the man you so dearly loved.

[snowysosturn]

Speeding Car - Matt Sturniolo Part 29

64.media.tumblr.com

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 6 Part 7 Part 8 Part 9 Part 10 Part 11 Part 12 Part 13 Part 14 Part 15 Part 16 Part 17 Part 18 Part 19 Part 20 Part 21 Part 22 Part 23 Part 24 Part 25 Part 26 Part 27 Part 28 Part 29 Finale

Pairing : y/n x Matt Sturniolo

Summary : After six years with your boyfriend Alex, you start to mentally check out. At a UCLA party, Alex reconnects with his childhood friend Emily, who proposes a double date with her boyfriend Matt. Your attraction to Matt grows as he pays you the first real attention you've had in years, sparking a complicated emotional journey.

Warnings : MDNI, mentions of memory loss, guilt, mentions of car accident, anxiety, angst, trauma

Matt’s POV

Picking Nate up from the airport with Nick and Chris was a nice break from the whirlwind of thoughts that had been consuming me. He looked exhausted after his flight, so we agreed to head straight home so he could crash for a bit. The ride back was full of the usual routine, Nick making jokes, Chris trying to keep Nate awake by asking him random questions. But I barely joined in. My mind was elsewhere, stuck on things I didn’t want to think about.

Once we got home, Nate headed straight for the Chris’ room, mumbling something about needing a few hours of sleep before he could even think straight. I just nodded, feeling the weight of my own exhaustion, even though I hadn’t done much all day. Just eat and drive.

I went up to my room and lay down on the bed, staring blankly at the ceiling. My mind was all over the place, it was all one tangled mess. No matter how much time had passed, being around Y/n today had brought it all back. Seeing her sitting across from me in that cafe earlier.. how I blurted out her order without even thinking… it felt like a slap in the face, but it was me slapping my own face out of pure stupidity. I was trying to keep my distance, but there was this pull, like no matter how hard I tried to let go, part of me just couldn’t.

I don’t know how long I lay there, just lost in my own thoughts. It felt like minutes, but it ended up being hours. Everything was a blur until I heard a knock on my door.

Chris walked in without waiting for an answer - classic Chris. "Yo, you good?" he asked, leaning against the doorframe.

"Yeah, I'm fine" I mumbled, though we both knew I was lying.

He didn’t push it. "We’re thinking about going to Topgolf. You wanna come?"

I hesitated. The last thing I wanted was to be around people, especially since my mind wouldn’t shut up about Y/n. But I needed the distraction. I couldn’t keep lying here, spiraling.

"Yeah, sure" I said, sitting up and running a hand through my hair. "I’ll go."

Chris grinned, clearly happy with my answer. "Alright, let’s go then. Nate’s already hyped about beating everyone."

I forced a small smile, but inside, I felt like I was barely holding it together. Maybe a few rounds of golf would get my mind off things, or at least, I hoped it would.

-

We pulled into Topgolf and headed inside, grabbing a booth on the top floor. As we settled in, I couldn’t shake the uneasy feeling building in my gut. This was the same booth we’d been in when Y/n came with us. I hadn’t been here since that day, and now it felt like everything was rushing back all at once, like the past was coming back to haunt me.

I logged into my account on the screen, waiting for the players to load, and there it was, her nickname, still saved as a player. A flood of emotions hit me hard, like I was drowning. I felt sick. Everywhere I turned, there was a reminder of her, and I couldn't seem to escape it.

Trying to focus, I sat down on the seat, but my mind was spinning. Everything about this place, about today, felt wrong. Nate stood up to take his first shot, when he suddenly turned around and asked: 

"How's Y/n doing Matt? Has her swing gotten better since the last time?" He laughs.

My body froze up. My mind scrambling for what to say. I’d forgotten Nate didn’t know everything that had happened.

"Uh.." I started, but the words got stuck in my throat. What could I even say? That things were beyond complicated?

Nick must’ve sensed the tension, because he quickly jumped in. "She's doing alright. She was in a bit of an accident so just getting back to normal, you know?"

Nate nodded, oblivious to the weight of his question. "Oh god sorry to hear.. You two were pretty close for a while there."

I felt Chris glance at me, but I avoided his eyes. "Yeah.. we were" I muttered, focusing on the course ahead. The words stung more than I expected.

“I’ll talk about it another time, man” I said to Nate, my voice low. “Maybe when my head's clearer.” He nodded, sensing that now wasn’t the time to push it, and thankfully didn’t bring it up again. "Shit, I should’ve asked Madi to come" Nick said, already calling her on FaceTime.

I could hear their conversation from the side, his voice casual. "Can we go to the beach after?" Nick asked. "Madi said she’s near Venice, that she could meet us there."

Venice Beach. Of course. There was just no escaping it. It felt like the universe was messing with me, constantly reminding me of Y/n, of everything I’d lost or maybe never even had.

I sat back, staring out over the range, feeling like I was being pulled in two directions. Was this a sign I was meant to take? Something telling me to face the truth, or just a cruel joke from the world reminding me of what I couldn’t have?

The sun was setting, casting a warm glow over the Topgolf range as we wrapped up the session. Chris was all smiles, having beaten Nate this time. The light banter between them helped ease the tension I’d been feeling, if only for a little while.

We piled back into the car and drove toward Venice Beach. The ride was mostly quiet, the chatter from earlier dying down as we all settled into our own thoughts. I kept my eyes on the road, trying to focus on anything other than the mess swirling in my head. I wondered what Y/n was doing now.

When we got to Venice, the sky was pitch black. We parked near the skate park and met up with Madi, who was waiting with a smile on her face.

She greeted us with hugs, and Nick immediately looped his arm around her, walking ahead as they chatted. We walked toward the beach, the sounds of skaters in the background mixing with the ocean’s waves. I kept my distance, trying to act like everything was fine, but the more I looked around, the more restless I felt.

Being here wasn’t helping. If anything, it was making things worse.

As we walked along the beach, Nate fell in step beside me. He didn’t say anything at first, just quietly observing. Eventually, he broke the silence.

"Hey, man" he started, his voice low, "you wanna talk about Y/n?"

I hadn’t expected him to bring it up so soon, but I guess Nate always knew when something was off. I hesitated, staring at the sand beneath my feet, trying to figure out if I was even ready to say everything that had been eating at me. But avoiding it wasn’t going to help, and maybe talking to someone outside of it all would give me some kind of perspective.

"Yeah" I finally said, letting out a breath I hadn’t realized I’d been holding. "I guess it’s time I told you everything."

We slowed our pace, letting Nick, Chris, and Madi walk ahead. I glanced at them, making sure they were out of earshot before I began.

"It’s complicated, man" I said, shaking my head. "Y/n and I… we were something before her accident. I don’t even know if I can call it a relationship, but it felt real. Then she lost her memory after it, and it’s like she doesn’t even know who I am anymore. Alex.. her boyfriend at the time.. remember? Well he was there when she woke up in the hospital, and she thought she was still with him. And I.." I paused, trying to keep my voice steady, "I just didn’t fight for her the way I should have."

Nate looked at me, frowning. "Wait, so Alex just slid back into her life like nothing happened?"

"Yeah" I said, bitterness creeping into my tone. "And I didn’t stop him. I didn’t push, didn’t tell her how things really were between us. I just.. let it happen because I thought she needed space. But now I realize I probably screwed everything up."

Nate nodded, processing everything I was saying. "And she still doesn’t remember you two were together?"

I shook my head. "Not really. She’s been around us but I don't know if she’s putting the pieces together slowly.”

Nate ran a hand through his hair, clearly taken aback by everything. "Damn, man. That’s a lot."

"Yeah, tell me about it" I said, letting out a frustrated laugh. "I just don’t know where I stand anymore. Should I push? Should I let her figure things out on her own? It’s killing me, being around her and pretending like none of it ever happened."

Nate clapped a hand on my shoulder, a serious look in his eyes. "I can’t pretend to know what that’s like, but if you care about her, really care, you can’t keep sitting on the sidelines, man. Maybe it’s time you stop letting everyone else make the moves."

His words hit me harder than I expected. Maybe Nate was right. Maybe I’d been standing still for too long, waiting for something to change when I should’ve been the one making the change.

We caught up to the rest of the group, and I could see Chris running ahead along the sides of the water like a dog chasing a bone.

"Wait, why doesn’t Y/n like fish again?" he asked.

"It scares her when they swim around her feet" I said, laughing a little as the memory came back to me - the small reminder of her, her little quirks, what makes her her.

Chris continued to run ahead, and Madi laughed next to me, unable to control her laughter at the way Chris was running. The beach was nearly empty, and for a moment, I wished more people could’ve seen it like this. Venice was peaceful and quiet tonight. It felt like we had the beach to ourselves.

I glanced around, taking it all in, but that’s when I saw her.

It couldn’t be.

There’s no way she’s here too.

She was leaving.

Fuck.

I have to go after her.

Y/n’s POV

I slammed the door to my car, letting out a heavy sigh. I didn’t even need to think about where I was going, muscle memory took over, guiding me down streets I had driven hundreds of times before. I didn’t bother with Google Maps, I could do this journey in my sleep. My hands gripped the steering wheel tighter than necessary, the feeling of numbness settling deeper with each passing second. Every thought in my head was blurred, but somehow the path ahead was painfully clear.

After what felt like short drive was actually an hour. I turned into the near empty parking lot. LA Kings Valley Ice Center. It was almost surreal seeing it so quiet, the lot nearly deserted, like it was waiting for me, offering me solace. Apparently I hadn’t been here in years, yet it felt like only yesterday that this place had been my second home. A sanctuary. A part of me I’d given up without realizing what I was losing.

For him.

I parked my car, sat there for a minute, and just stared at the building. It loomed in front of me, a reminder of everything I used to be, everything I could have been. The memories of countless hours spent on the ice flooded back, laughing with friends, perfecting routines, pushing my body to its limits. A life I’d left behind, foolishly, for someone who had no place in my future.

Stepping out of the car, I headed toward the front desk, a strange mix of anticipation and apprehension swelling inside me. The older man at the desk smiled at me as if he recognized me, and I couldn't help but smile back, though it felt half hearted. I asked for a pair of skates, and he handed them over with ease, no questions asked.

Walking into the arena, I could hear the familiar hum of the ice machine in the distance. There were two people skating on the rink, a man and a woman, moving leisurely, chatting as they circled the ice. As I stood there, watching them, they drifted off toward the stands and finally out of sight, leaving the entire place to me.

I was alone.

Completely alone.

The feeling of solitude was oddly comforting, like the universe was giving me space to reconnect with the person I used to be, the girl who thrived on the ice, who had dreams that went beyond a relationship or the approval of someone else. The arena was mine tonight. No distractions, no noise. Just me and the ice.

I sat down on the bench and laced up my skates, tightening them carefully, just as I’d done a thousand times before. It felt like a ritual, grounding me. When I stood up and took that first step onto the ice, it was like nothing had changed. The cold air brushed against my face as I glided forward, the sound of the blades cutting through the ice was the only noise in the massive space. It felt like slipping back into an old, beloved routine. How could I have abandoned this?

I started skating faster, gaining momentum with each stride. My heart pounded, and for the first time in days, I felt alive. The ice beneath me seemed to fuel my every movement, my body responding as though no time had passed at all. I weaved across the rink, testing my limits, pushing harder and harder. My muscles remembered every motion, every turn, and I couldn’t help but wonder how I could have traded this feeling for something so fleeting, so shallow.

The thought made my stomach churn with regret and anger. I sacrificed so much for someone who betrayed me, who wasn’t even worth the sacrifice in the first place. The realization stung, but it also fueled me, made me more determined.

I thought about the tricks I used to practice, the ones I’d nail after hours of trying and failing. The triple axel came to mind, one of the hardest, but the one I’d obsessed over. Could I still do it?

I skated faster, building up the speed I’d need for the jump, my mind and body trying to sync. I bent my knees and launched myself into the air but the landing was rough, unsteady. I stumbled out of it and nearly fell, my breath hitching in frustration.

"You know you can do it, Y/n" a voice called out, breaking the silence.

I whipped my head around, searching for the source of the voice. There, standing just outside the rink,

Matt.

I blinked, unsure if he was really there or if my mind was playing tricks on me. He was leaning against the barrier, watching me with an expression I couldn’t quite read.

“What.. what are you doing here?” I asked, my voice shaky as I stood up, brushing off the ice.

"I knew you'd be here" Matt says, his voice steady.

"Wait, how did you—" I start to ask, but before I can finish, he cuts me off.

"I know you better than anyone else, Y/n," Matt interrupts, his eyes locked onto mine with a quiet intensity that leaves me speechless.

I shake my head, overwhelmed. How could he possibly say that? How could anyone claim to know me when I don't even know myself anymore? The last few weeks have been a blur of confusion, pain, and revelations that have turned my entire world upside down. I feel like a stranger to myself, piecing together memories that don’t feel like mine.

"You don’t know me, Matt." I say, my voice trembling slightly as I take a step back, trying to create some distance. "Not anymore. I don’t know if i'm the same person I was before."

He looks at me, his face softening, like he understands more than I want to believe he does. "Maybe not" he admits, stepping forward slowly, careful not to push. "But I know the you standing right here, right now. The you who comes to this rink when the world gets too heavy. The you who still feels at home on the ice, even if everything else feels out of control."

His words hit me harder than I expected. The weight of them presses down on me because he’s right. As much as I want to push him away, to tell him he’s wrong, I can’t. Because in this moment, standing here on this rink, in the place where I’ve always felt the most like myself, he sees me. Maybe even more than I see myself.

But then I really deep it, trying to hold back the emotions building up inside of me. I’ve been holding everything in for so long, trying to be strong, trying to figure it all out on my own. But with Matt standing there, looking at me like he can see through all the walls I’ve built, I feel exposed. I don't understand why he’s here though. All he’s done is act cold towards me for the most part. I skate off the rink into the stands, almost in embarrassment.

"I don’t even understand why you’re here, Matt" I finally say, my voice cracking slightly. The words are more vulnerable than I meant them to be, but I can’t help it. I need answers, and I need them now. "What are you doing here?"

For a moment, he doesn’t say anything, just stands there on the edge of the rinks stands, his expression unreadable. The tension in the air is thick, and the silence feels unbearable.

"I’m here because I couldn’t stay away any longer. I need to tell you everything." Matt finally says, his voice quiet but steady. He looks at me, really looks at me this time, and something in his eyes makes my breath catch. "I know you're confused, Y/n, and I don’t blame you. I should’ve been more honest with you from the start, but everything got so messed up."

I stare at him, trying to process what he’s saying, but it feels like my brain is working against me. "But why?" I ask, my voice almost pleading. "Why didn’t you try? Why didn’t you tell me?"

Matt sighs, and for the first time, I see the vulnerability in him, the cracks in the wall he’s been putting up. "Because I thought you deserved better than to have your life thrown into even more chaos. I didn’t want to confuse you or hurt you more than you already were. Everything was my fault.”

"Your fault? I know everything that happened with Alex, thats not your fault Matt." I say, the words heavy as they leave my mouth. My voice is more uncertain than I intended, and I don’t even know if I’m saying it for him or myself. “I’m sorry I didn’t listen to you in the hospital, it was all just so overwhelming. But I'm confused about where you come in. What we were.. I just don’t understand it."

Matt stands still, watching me closely. His face doesn’t give anything away, which only makes this more frustrating.

"I feel this pull to you.." I continue, trying to find the right words, even though they feel like they’re tumbling out awkwardly, "And I don’t know why. I feel stupid because you can't even look at me properly."

I stop, catching my breath. The weight of it all feels suffocating, like I’m drowning in a past I can't fully grasp. My heart beats faster with every second of silence between us. Why isn’t he saying anything?

I take a shaky breath, trying to steady myself. "Why didn’t you fight for us?" I ask, my voice barely above a whisper. "Why didn’t you try?"

Matt looks down, and for a moment, I think he’s not going to answer. But then he looks back up at me, his eyes filled with regret. "Because I was scared" he admits. "When you lost your memory, I didn’t know what to do. I thought maybe it was better to keep my distance. You had enough going on, and I didn’t want to make it worse. I had lost you once, I was afraid I was going to lose you again. I blame myself for the accident."

“What accident?” I interrupt, my frustration boiling over. I can feel my hands trembling, my heart racing. “Everyone keeps saying there was an accident, but no one wants to tell me what it is. What happened before? What happened during it?” I take a shaky breath, the words spewing out before I can stop them. “Can someone please just give me the fucking answers?”

Matt’s voice breaks through the silence, heavy with guilt. “Y/n, you were hit by a car.” The words hang in the air, an anchor dragging me down into a sea of confusion.

“What do you mean?” I whisper, feeling the world around me blur as I struggle to grasp what he’s saying.

“We were at a party” he admits, his eyes filled with an agonizing regret. “I should have kept you safe. I was the one who was supposed to be there for you, and I failed.”

“What happened?” My voice trembles as I try to piece it all together.

Matt’s expression darkens, and he takes a shaky breath. “You ran into the street. I tried to get you off the road, but I was too late..”

He stops, his throat tightening as he presses his hands to his face, fighting against the impact of memories. I can see the pain etched across his features, and I want to reach out to him, to reassure him, but I’m frozen, trapped in my own whirlwind of emotions. His words cut deep, and I feel a mix of anger and sadness wash over me. How could he carry this burden alone? I want to scream that it wasn’t just his fault, that I made my choices too.

“Matt, you shouldn’t beat yourself up over this, its not like you were the one driving, you could’ve never prevented that..” I finally get some words out. 

He shakes his head, tears pooling in his eyes. “You should have never been in that situation. If I hadn’t pushed you away.. if I had just told you how I felt instead of running from it, you wouldn’t have been on that road in the first place.”

I take a step back, trying to absorb everything he’s saying. The fragmented pieces of my life start to form a picture, but it’s still so hazy.

“Please, just tell me what happened” I plead, my heart racing. “I need to know. I need to know it all. From whatever we were to the accident. I need to know it all.”

He looked up at me, I could see the sorrow in his eyes as he nodded at me.

"The night we met.. We clicked instantly. It was a double date. You and Alex. Me and Emily.  There was this connection, like we just understood each other. I remember everything about you.. the little things, I remember your fears and that your favourite colour is green."

He runs a hand through his hair, clearly grappling with the weight of what he’s about to tell me. "We had seen eachother a bit after that, in group settings.. I held a party in my place, Emily actually invited you and Alex. Emily was a mess that night, it was almost like you could see the cracks in my relationship with her too. I could see them in yours too. Our bond only grew stronger that night. There was this one night that changed everything in my eyes. Emily asked me to get her purse from your place. You’d been hanging out the night before and she left it in your apartment by mistake. She got invited by Alex to go out to celebrate his captaincy so she needed it. It was the same night Alex got into that fight. When you opened the door, I could tell you’d been crying, and it killed me to see you like that. I thought about you the whole way home. So after I dropped Emily off at the club, I went back to check on you."

He smiles faintly, as if remembering the night. "I brought you back to my place. We all ended up playing Mario Kart together. Me, you, Nick and Chris." He glances away, a shadow of regret crossing his face. "That's why I was so off the other night.. I felt like I was reliving that night again but in all the wrong ways. But that original game night.. Y/n I can’t explain how much comfort I felt just being near you. I would've kissed you that night, Y/n. I wanted to. But then Nick came in, talking about that fight Alex had gotten into, and the moment was gone. I took you to the hospital since that's where Alex was, and the four of us waited there all night."

His voice softens, and he looks away for a moment. " When I left you and Alex at home, Emily gave me hell for being around you. So I had to cut you off. But.. the feelings I had for you didn’t go away. They never did."

I feel a tightness in my chest, as if my heart is trying to process all of this, the weight of it pressing down on me like a storm.

“I should really thank Nick for a lot of this, because the two of you got close really fast, and no matter what I had going on, he still always included you. He invited you to Topgolf with us one night when I was meant to be keeping our distance. He actually overheard Emily give out to me that night about you. Told me I was stupid for listening to her. It was almost as if he knew I had feelings for you then and there, he never was really fond of Emily. But her and Alex were out of the country together on a school trip , our friends Nate and Madi were coming along that night too so it seemed like no big deal. And I knew deep down I wanted to be around you.”

"Being at Topgolf.. I’ll never forget it.." Matt lightly chuckles, “You were swinging the club as if you were playing mini golf.” He breaks out into a laugh. My jaw drops, “Oh my god.. I’m so embarrassed” I say, covering my hands with my face. "Don’t be embarrassed.. It was cute..” Matt continues. “I helped you with it and you swung like a champ straight away. You didn’t win or anything now but I could see the improvements thanks to me.” He grinned. I gave him a light hit on the arm, the feeling of butterflies bulling through my stomach. 

“Chris wasnt ready to go home so soon, so we went to Venice beach..” We locked eyes with eachother hard. I wonder if he knew I was there tonight.

“We were walking alone on the beach, everyone went ahead into the water. It was just the two of us and I loved every second of it. Being by your side again felt.. freeing. I wanted to kiss you so badly that night too, but then Chris had this whole jellyfish thing." He lets out a bitter laugh. "Even then, I couldn’t get enough of you. You opened up to me that night, told me about giving up skating for Alex."

I stare at him, my mind racing as he speaks. These pieces of a past I can’t remember, the fragments of a life that still feel foreign to me.

"I could just picture you on the ice." Matt says softly, his voice full of admiration. "You were so sad you stopped training for the Olympics. I just wanted to see you happy again. So the next night, I rented out this ice rink right here, just for you. And god, Y/n, if you could’ve seen how you lit up that night. I kissed you. That night, I kissed you, and my god was it euphoric. I stayed in your place that night and we were just inseparable since. Going for brunch, hanging out all the time.."

My breath catches in my throat, but Matt looks away again. I cant believe he’s done this all for me. He tries to speak again clearly struggling with what comes next. "It wasn’t just a crush. I cared about you more than I’ve ever cared about anyone. I wanted to protect you, to be there for you.. but I couldn’t even do that right."

I can see the pain in his eyes, the rawness of his confession. The words he’s about to say feel heavy, like a weight hanging between us.

"The night before Alex and Emily came home from Europe, Nick and Chris went to our friend Tara’s party.." he begins, his voice quieter now. "It was just the two of us in my house and you told me that Alex and Emily were cheating on us. I thought that was it. Our way out. I thought we could leave them and be together, I thought it would happen anyway, Youd made it clear you were done with Alex but I know how hard Emily could be, but I was ready, Y/n. I was ready to walk away from Emily and start something real with you."

His words hit me like a punch to the gut. All the confusion I had been feeling, the pull towards him, it suddenly made more sense. 

"But then…” He stops as he reaches in his jean pocket, pulling out a piece of jewellery and handing it to me. An earring, my missing earring. “It must’ve fallen off in my bed when you passed out that night" he said, his voice softening but struggling to get the next sentence out. "You’ve never know this part.. but Emily found it before I could confront her about Alex. She didn’t even give me a chance to explain. She blackmailed me, Y/n. She told me that if I left her, she'd ruin your life. She’d tell Alex everything, twist it, make your life a living hell. I know what shes capable of, so I believed her." Matt’s eyes finally met mine, full of regret. "I didn’t know what else to do. I was a coward. I should’ve walked away, should��ve fought for us right then, but I didn’t. She told me I had to act like nothing ever happened, and that I could never see you again. She made me go to that party with her the night.. I didnt expect you to be there.. Maybe I can give out to Nick for this part of the story since he invited you along to this one.. My world stopped when I spotted you. It was awful. You were so clueless to everything. I knew you say me sitting with Emily. I was torn by what I wanted to do and what I had to do.. I found you in the bathroom.. I told you that what we had was a mistake.. That it was over."

My heart clenched at the memory of his words, even though I couldn’t fully recall them. It was like an emotional scar that hadn’t healed, even if the details were hazy.

"You were devastated, Y/n. I saw it in your eyes. And I’m not going to act like I wasn’t devastated too, even though I had to pretend then." His voice broke again, and he took a shaky breath. "I shattered your heart in that bathroom. And then.. you ran. You ran into the street."

I could see him reliving it, the horror flashing across his face. His hands trembled, and he brought them to his face as if trying to shield himself from the memory.

"I tried to stop you. I tried to yell at you from the balcony.." he whispered. "The last thing I heard you say was that you loved me. I know you were about to say you thought I loved you too, but I cut you off. I told you to get off the road... and then-"

He couldn’t finish the sentence. His breath hitched as he choked back the words, pressing his palms against his face like he was trying to push the pain away.

I stood there, frozen, my thoughts racing, trying to make sense of everything. The accident. The way he’d pushed me away just when its evident I thought we had something real.

"It’s my fault" he whispered, his voice barely audible. "All of it. You were only on that road because I made you believe what we had wasn’t real. But it was, Y/n. It was the realest thing I’ve ever had. I’ve never experienced anything like you. And I’ve been grieving you ever since."

His confession hung heavy in the air, suffocating me with the weight of the truth. All the anger, confusion, and longing I’d felt since waking up in the hospital crashed over me like a tidal wave.

“And I’m so sorry I never fought for you. I know I should’ve, but then Alex appeared in the hospital. And you couldn’t remember me. He was acting like you were still together. You had no memory of us, I caused you enough pain as it was. I didn’t want to make it worse.”

I looked at him, my heart pounding as the reality of his words sank in. Matt's eyes glistened with unshed tears. "I thought I was doing the right thing. I thought it would be easier for you, that you could heal without me dragging you back into the chaos. But I was wrong. I was so wrong."

There was a silence between us, thick with unspoken words and feelings that had been buried under layers of hurt. I could see the regret etched across his face, the guilt weighing heavily on his shoulders.

"I thought I could forget you, that maybe it would make everything simpler," I admitted, my voice barely above a whisper. "But you’re unforgettable."

He stepped closer, the desperation in his eyes mirroring my own. "Y/n, I’ve spent every day since that night wishing I could take it all back. Even how I acted so standoff-ish around you. It’s because I love you. I always have.”

“I want to show you that what we had was real, let you relieve it all. I want to fight for you, if you’ll let me.”

a/n: we have one more part :(

taglist : @muwapsturniolo @anitahunt @sturnfannn @jayde510 @chrissfavhoe @babyalliah-777 @v33angel l @urmom69lol @willowrites @ribread03 @2muchofaslvt @sturnsaver @sleepysturniolo @jcsturniolo11 @jessie-essie @hoeforchrizz @mynbbys @sturniolopanini i @mattsturnxoxo o @delicatechrry @t77te @sturnsyaper69 @hotdismylife @maggot3647 @ivysturnss @noplaceissafeanymore @mattssgf @yourfavsturniologirl @maethem0nth @sillyponygrl @mattyblover07 @imjusthereforthesturniolosmut @dominicfikeenthusiast @mattsfavbigtitties @ncm9696 @chrisstvrns @schlutt4matty @lvrsturniolo @chrissolos @ilusa @amelia-sturniolo3 @wonnieeluvvr @pussydestroyer100 @amexiass @mystinkylefttoe26 @lizzysmith110 @sturniololovebot @secret-sturniolo @freshythefishy @witchofthehour @stvrnlover @alizestvrnss @beachbabe000 @pinkdyit @pvssychicken @starkeyszn @matts-girlfriend

[and-claudia]

Little Sundress (Charles Xavier x Fem!Reader) SMUT!! DAY 1 of KINKTOBER

Set during First Class

Warnings: sundress kink, oral (f receiving), I think that is it, let me know if I missed one though!!

Wordcount: 1500+

Being in Charle’s childhood home was interesting, to say the least. He and I had very different upbringings, and seeing how massive this place truly was only seemed to prove that more. 

“And here is the kitchen.” He said, “I know it’s not anything crazy b-”

“I love it.” I said, cutting him off. 

He turned to me and smiled. 

“It’s charming. And honestly, anything is better than our tiny one back in Oxford.” I said with a laugh. 

“Well, I am glad you like it. And you do know, you don’t have to cook for all of us.” He said, stepping closer and placing his hands on my hips. 

“I know, but I want to. Plus, it will make me feel more helpful… my mutation isn’t the most useful in a fight.” I said, looking down. 

“That won’t be the case much longer, dear. That’s why we’re here to train and grow our abilities. I believe you’ll be able to copy any mutation of anyone at any time without touching them by the time we’re done.” He said, using his thumb and pointer finger to grab my chin and tilt it up to look at him. 

I smiled at him, “I hope so.” 

I didn’t actually say it to him out loud. Since he was touching my face, I was able to say it to him telepathically. 

Charles finished showing me around and ended in the room we’d be staying in. I took some time to unpack while he went off to do his own thing. Once all my clothes were unpacked I decided to take the chance to shower before I went down stairs to make dinner. We had been traveling all day so I felt a little gross and I knew a shower would feel amazing, especially since I would be getting the hot water before everyone else. 

When I got out, I decided to throw on one of my sun dresses. It was always so rainy in Oxford I hardly ever got a chance to wear them, so I intended to take full advantage of that. I threw on some simple kitten heels so that I wasn’t walking across the mansion barefoot. Then, I made a few adjustments to my outfit before heading out. 

On my way to the kitchen I passed a few Raven. 

“Why are you all dressed up? Are you and Charles going out or something?” She asked, slightly confused. 

“No, not tonight. I am actually just on my way to make everyone dinner. I just never really got to where these dresses often, so I figured I’d take advantage.” I said. 

“Make sure you make it to the kitchen before Charles sees you. He won’t be able to keep his hands to himself once he sees you, and I’d like to make sure we get fed tonight.” She teased, and I just laughed and rolled my eyes before continuing to the kitchen. 

Once I got there I set about getting everything I would need for dinner ready. I was just beginning to chop the vegetables when Erik, Charles and Hank all walked in. 

“Hello, boys,” I said, spinning around to greet them, causing the dress to flow out. 

Erik and Hank both said their own hellos, but Charles was too busy staring… I was starting to think Raven may have been right. 

“Dinner will be ready in probably half an hour.” I informed them. 

“Do you want some help?” Hank offered. 

I was about to tell him that he could help finish chopping while I got the chicken in the oven, but Charles cut me off before I could. 

“I got it, I can help her… you two go ahead and… yeah.” He said, clearly already a little flustered as he walked over to help me. Luckily, the other two men got the hint and left us alone in the kitchen. 

“Well, that was smooth, Charlie…” I teased. 

“What?”

“I got it, I can help her… you two go ahead and… yeah.” I mocked his voice as I repeated what he had just said. 

“Well, can you blame me?” He asked, turning to look me over, not even the slightest bit ashamed of the way his hungry eyes racked over my body. 

“I have no idea what you’re talking about.” I said, stepping past him to grab something from the fridge, but he caught my arm. 

“Oh, but you do. It doesn’t take a telepath to know that… but it is useful being one because now I know that you have nothing on under there.” He said, reaching for the hem of my dress but I smacked his hand away. 

“I gotta cook dinner.” I said, leaning up to press a quick kiss to his cheek but he turned his head and I kissed his lips instead which he immediately took advantage of that. His hands gripped my hips as he pulled me against him. 

“Mm, I’d rather start with dessert.” He said against my lips as he grinded his hips against me. 

“Charles, we can’t. Not here.” I said. 

“Who said? It’s my house, I should be able to fuck my girlfriend wherever I please…” In one swift motion, he turned us around so that my back was now to the table that sat in the middle of the room, “And right now, it would please me to fuck her right here.” 

Without our lips separating, he lifted me up onto the table as we continued to make out. His hands slid down to my knees, and he pulled them apart so he could stand between them. 

“What if someone walks in?” I asked, glancing over to the door. 

“Don’t worry about that, darling.” He said, subtly inching my dress up higher and higher. 

He finally broke away from the kiss and gave me a look before dropping down to kneel on one knee between my legs. 

“You should wear these more often, love.” He said as he began planting kisses along the inside of my thigh. 

He left a trail of kisses and a few love bites all the way up my inner thigh. Then, when he reached where I wanted his lips the most, he hesitated. I felt the cool air of him sighing so close, sending a chill up my spine. I was mentally preparing myself to feel his tongue delving into my cunt. So, when I felt his lips press to my other thigh and begin working their way back down it, I accidentally let a small whimper slip through my lips. 

“So impatient.” He mumbled, and I could feel his smirking against my skin. 

“No, you’re just a fucking tease.” I sighed. 

“Oh really? Maybe I should just let you get back to cooking then.” He said, going to stand up. 

I reached forward and caught his shoulder, pushing him back down, “Don’t you dare. You’re going to eat me out.” I said to him telepathically. 

“As you wish.” 

He dropped back down and went straight the my cunt. No time was wasted as he began fucking me with his mouth. His tongue was working wonders. I was trying so hard not to let anyone hear me. 

Suddenly, he pulled away and looked up at me. His lips were shining with a mix of my wetness and his own spit. 

“No, let them hear you, darling.” He said. His eyes were the darkest I had ever seen them. 

He didn’t even wait for me to respond before going back to lapping at my cunt. His nose was now also rubbing up against my clit, sending me soaring towards ecstasy. 

“Fuck, Charles, keep going.” I said, running my hands through his hair, pulling it lightly, which earned a grunt from him that I felt vibrate up through my cunt. 

I could feel that oh so familiar and welcom feeling of the coil tightening, knowing it would snap soon from the tension. Charles must have felt that I was getting close too because he began to speed up. 

“You taste so good, love.” He said to me telepathically, “Wish I could eat you out every day.” 

“Charles…” I moaned out loud, not caring that I could hear my moans echoing off the walls. 

“Go ahead, darling, come all over my tongue.” 

“Fuck!” I moaned as I came. 

Charles refused to let a single drop of my release go to waste as he lapped up every bit of it. Once he was done, he pulled back, chin wet with a mix of my release and his own spit. As he stood, he grabbed the rag from off the table and used it to wipe his chin, and only his chin, before he leaned over to kiss me, allowing me to taste myself on his lips. The kiss was so soft and gentle that I never wanted it to end. That was until I smelt something burning. 

I reluctantly pulled away and glanced around him. 

“Fuck, the chicken burned.” I said. 

Charles turned around and just turned the oven off. 

“Oh well, that gives me more time to fuck you… where shall we take it next? My new office, perhaps?” He asked. 

The thought did excite me, but what was everyone supposed to do for dinner now? 

“Change of plans. Go into town for dinner tonight.” Charles said to everyone in the house using his mind. 

“Problem solved.” He said before leaning in to give me another kiss, “So… my office?” He asked, raising his eyebrow at me. 

Kinktober taglist:

@comicbookslut

[strnilolover]

.✦ ── Kiss ‘n’ Cold ── ✦.

♡ Bff!Chris x Bff!Fem!Reader

⚠︎ Warnings : Mutual Pining, Fluff, best-friends who share a kiss (smooch), Rainnnn, mention of a pet name (sweetheart)

♡ Wc : 1.3k

♡ A/N : Have you ever had a kiss in the rain moment? I’ve only ever had it once, I’m not normally a fan of the rain cause it’s cold and wet lmao. Also wanted to write a fluff thing for Chris cause I need to write more for him :(

Fall was your favorite time of the year, of course Chris knew that, he was your best friend. Lounging around inside his house wasn’t how you really saw your day being spent, and he could see that.

Chris looked over at you with a playful smile, his eyes bright with an idea. "Hey, why don't we go for a walk to the park?" he suggested, his voice carrying that familiar warmth that made your heart thump every time you heard it.

It was a simple request, one you guys had done a hundred times before. Without hesitation, you nodded, getting up off the couch to slip your shoes on. Chris followed in tow, slipping his shoes on as well.

You paused momentarily, turning to Chris after your shoes were on and your scarf was wrapped around your neck. “I don’t have a jacket Chris.” You stated. Your big eyes looking into his, having asked a question without needing to speak.

He just smiled again, moving from his spot on the couch to a closet by the front door, pulling out two different zip up jackets that were his. He turned to face you, holding the fabric items in his hands. “Which one do you want sweetheart?” He asked.

You stood there analyzing the two jackets, a dark grey zip up and a more fluffy zip up. Of course after looking at the two options, you chose the fuzzy one. Chris nodded when you pointed to the one you’d like, moving toward your frame and spilling the jacket over your shoulders.

You smiled at him, looping your arms in and zipping the jacket up while Chris put the other one on. “Alright,” Chris started, walking toward the front door. “You ready to go?” He asked, turning the knob and opening the door for you.

You nodded eagerly, walking through the door as he held it open. He followed suit, closing the door and locking it before he turned and held his arm out for you to take. You obliged, looping your arm through his own as you guys started to walk.

The air was crisp, fallen leaves crunching under the weight of your feet. It was chilly, but not enough to be deathly cold, the jacket providing extra warmth. There was a comforting silence between you both, not needing to say a word to just enjoy each others company.

You hummed softly, kicking little piles of leaves. Chris watched, lips tugging up into a smile.

“You know, we should get hot chocolate.” You stated, turning your head to now look at Chris as you continued to walk. He hummed, “we’d have to walk so far for that though.” He whined, lips turning into a pout.

You shook your head, eyes rolling as you laughed at his childlike behavior. “A little walking never hurt no one, besides we’re already out and I know there’s a place up the way!” You cheered excitedly. Chris couldn’t keep up his pout for long, seeing how happy you were. So he just nodded, “okay okay — let’s go get your hot chocolate.”

-

You guys had been walking for about 20 minutes now, the hot chocolate place just a few more blocks up. The whole way you and Chris had been talking nonsense, laughing at one another’s jokes and bad puns.

Though mid laugh, you noticed the sky turning darker. Casting a gloomy look over the town, the wind growing a little more chilly.

You tapped Chris’ arm, his laughing stopping as well. “Chris, I think it’s going to rain.” You whispered softly, eyes gazing up into the sky as more dark clouds seemed to roll in.

Chris groaned, “well so much for our nice walk.” He muttered, kicking the ground slightly. You giggled, watching as he basically threw a small tantrum. “You know Chris, rain isn’t all that bad. I actually enjoy it.” You say, holding your hand out in front of yourself.

The first drops of rain fell softly against your hand, almost unnoticed at first. But, soon the sky opened up, the once light drops becoming heavy, drenching both you and chris as you walked side by side.

Your legs continued to move as the rain drenched both your clothes. The items clinging to your skins, but you couldn’t find it in yourself to care. Chris on the other hand, didn’t like the rain as much as you did. Silently complaining under his breath as he began to grow cold.

You thought to yourself for a moment, breathing in the now earthy smell of the air. “You know Chris, I’ve never kissed anyone in the rain.” You say, Chris’ brows pinching in confusion as his eyes looked at you.

“You mean like from those mushy romance movies, where they confess their love for one another n’ shit?” He asked, faking a gross expression.

“Yes like those you weirdo.” You said, rolling your eyes at him. He chuckled, his eyes lingering on you a little longer. He couldn’t help but notice your cheeks now more pink from the cold, your nose the same shade. It made you look adorable. Your hair sticking slightly to your wet skin.

Chris stopped dead in his tracks, your interlinked arms tugging you back slightly as you turned to look at him in confusion. “Chris, why’d you stop?” You say, the sound of rain muffling your words slightly. He just looked at you, his own face pink from the coldness of the rain.

He gently pulled you toward him, your feet carrying you without hesitation. His arms wrapping around your back, practically holding your wet body against his own. Your head tilted to the side, brows pinched together.

“Do you want to have it?” He asked, his right hand coming up to your face, thumb brushing against your cheek softly. You froze, face now heating up at what he may be implying. “You — what do you mean?” You mumbled, tongue darting out to lick your lips, collecting water in the process.

Chris leaned forward more, “I mean, do you want to have it. Cause I’ll give it to you.” He said. You could feel his warm breath fan across your face despite the cold weather. “You mean..you’ll kiss me?” You asked, your head tilting up more to look at him better.

He nodded, the hand on your waist gripping you slightly tighter. “If that’s what you want, I’ll be happy to give it to you.” He said again, and you just stared at him, dumbfounded for a few moments. But once his words registered in your head, you couldn’t help the butterflies you felt. So you quickly nodded your head, a silent answer to his question.

He smiled, his right hand now gripping your chin softly as he pulled your face to his own. Your eyes fluttered shut, lips meeting each others. Surprisingly, his lips were warm despite the water that decorated his features.

The rain poured down around you both, the world a blur of gray and mist, but all you could focus on was Chris. His hands cradled your face, his touch gentle, almost hesitant, as if he was still unsure this was real. Your lips met in a kiss that was soft, yet full of everything you had held back for so long—years of friendship, of unspoken words, of wanting.

When you finally pulled away, both breathless and shivering from the cold, Chris rested his forehead against yours, his eyes half-closed, a smile tugging at his lips. “You know,” he whispered, his voice barely louder than the rain, “I think I’ve been waiting for this for a long time.” You laughed softly, heart swelling as you looked into his eyes, and in that moment, the chill of the rain was forgotten, replaced only by the warmth between you guys.

“I never thought you’d be willing to make my kiss in the rain come true.” You whispered back before you pushed your head forward once again, capturing his lips once more.

© Strnilolover

♡ A/N : you both might catch a cold with how long you both were in the rain for. But I’m sure it was worth it. (Sorry if this seems dragged on)

[marlynnofmany]

Other Uses for Packaging

I waved goodbye to the customers — other humans this time — then sat back and waited for the trash pickup. I didn’t blame them for not wanting to take all the packing material out into the spaceport. They hadn’t brought a hovercart or forklift, and had been unprepared for the huge crate full of bubble wrap and foam.

Other times, our little courier ship had done deliveries where time was short or regulations were tight, and all we would have been able to do was advise them on where to rent a hovercart or buy a crowbar. Luckily for these customers’ convenience and my conscience, today we could stick around and help them unpack the custom end table or whatever that was.

They’d left happy, with something much easier to carry, and Captain Sunlight had headed for the cockpit to call in the station’s trash crew. (Apparently this was a regular feature at this space dock, which was a nice change from the last few where we’d had to move the ship’s garbage over to the trash area under our own power.)

Zhee looked over the crate that he’d just taken great joy in disassembling. “Wood may be valuable here,” he said with a thoughtful click of a pincher arm. “If not to the station at large, then surely to another ship. I wonder if the captain thought of that.”

I glanced back at the open cargo bay. “Probably?”

“Probably,” Zhee agreed.

We were both silent for a moment while the spaceport bustled around us.

“I’m going to check,” he said, tapping his way up the ramp on his many bug feet. “Make sure none of that blows away.”

“Sure thing.” I looked at the piles. The only breeze in here was the faint wafting of ventilation systems and the occasional gentle landing of other ships at a safe distance, but I understood the impulse to be careful. That one package awhile ago, full of styrofoam beads, had been memorable. And terrible. The darn stuff was almost as bad as glitter, what with the way it stuck to things with static electricity. Nobody wanted a repeat of that.

This set of packaging was much better. The boards made a tidy stack, the foam was in rubbery sheets that didn’t leak bits everywhere, and even the bubble wrap was in long rows instead of individual panels. This was no top-of-the-line cryo suspension or force field generator, but it was respectable.

I organized the mess a bit while I waited. The rest of the crew either had stuff to do on the ship or out in the station, so despite all the ambient noise, things were quiet.

I started rolling up the bubble wrap, thinking someone might want to use it again, but found that many of the bubbles had gotten popped in the disassembly, leaving it only good for one thing.

The first bubble popped with a satisfying snap. By the third I’d pinpointed which direction the sounds were echoing from most, and I enjoyed the different noises I could get by tilting my head. None of the pedestrians were close enough to pay much attention, so I happily worked my way down the roll. I’d seen multiple other types of bubble wrap, some made by different cultures and different materials, and most of them didn’t actually pop. What a simple joy to find the regular old Earth kind again.

Mur’s voice from the cargo bay asked, “What’s making that sound?”

I sighed and turned. “Don’t tell me, this is another swear word in your language.”

Mur waved a tentacle. “No, of course not. I just wanted to know what’s breaking out here. It sounded like a problem.”

Before I could answer, Paint appeared behind him in a rush. “Is there a problem??”

“No,” I hurried to say. “Everything’s fine. It’s just bubble wrap. See?” I held up the section I’d been working on and popped another bubble.

Paint winced. “Is there something wrong with it?”

“No, it’s just garbage.” I rolled up the part I’d already flattened, then twisted it to pop the next row all at once.

“Okay, that almost sounded like a swear word,” Mur admitted.

I had to laugh at that. “Of course it did.”

Blip and Blop hurried out to join the growing crowd in the cargo bay. “What keeps breaking?” Blip asked, frills waving anxiously.

“It’s just bubble wrap!” I exclaimed. “See?” I held it up and popped another one.

Instead of nodding and going back to whatever they’d been doing, my alien coworkers remained perplexed. “Why does it keep popping?” Blop asked. “Are you doing that?”

“Yes!” I exclaimed.

“Why?” asked both Frillians at once. Paint and Mur also looked curious.

“Because it’s fun?” I replied, scrambling for an answer. I hadn’t thought this needed explaining. But apparently it did.

Paint asked, “How is that noise fun?”

“Well, it echoes—”

“You don’t need to worry about condensing materials for the trash pickup, if that’s the concern,” Mur said.

“Yes, I know—”

“Are there food items on your planet that you have to open like this?” Blip asked. “Large fish eggs, maybe?”

“No, ew! It’s just—”

A shadow loomed taller than the Frillian twins. “It is violensssss,” Trrili hissed, making them twitch. (I don’t know how she found a shadow in the cargo bay. Sometimes I think she brings them with her.) “Small-scale, sanctioned violence. These can be destroyed without repurcussionssssss.” She was choosing which words to hiss on, for effect.

“Sure,” I said, spreading my arms and lifting the bubble wrap. “Let’s go with that.”

Trrili wasn’t done. “Each tiny section can be crusssshed individually, with precision, or multiples at once for maximum volume.” She glided forward on quieter feet than Zhee’s, and the others made room for her.

I held out the bubble wrap. “You want a turn?” Her pincher arms didn’t seem suited to it, but I was curious to see where she’d go with this.

“Plasssssse it on the floor.”

“Sure.” I flapped the row out in front of her like a red carpet, and she moved like the predator she was to crush one after the other. With precision. And shiny black bug feet.

It gave me an idea. “Hey, wanna see who’s faster?” I grabbed another section and laid it out to one side. “You’ve got more feet, but my shoes are bigger.”

Trrili spread her mandibles in her favorite creepy smile. “Challenge acssssssepted.” She crouched like a spider and waited for me to be ready.

I glanced back at the others. “Anybody else wanna race?”

Mur spun on his tentacles and scooted back into the ship. “No thanks! I’m going back where it’s quieter.”

“Me too,” Paint said. “But thank you!” She scampered off.

Blip and Blop looked at each other in silence for a moment, fins waving. Then they turned to me. “We’ll judge,” Blip announced.

“All right!” I said. I wrangled my own section of bubble wrap, roughly the same length as Trrili’s, and struck my own ready pose. “Say when!”

The twins chorused, “Start!” and we were off. Pops filled the air along with Trrili’s delighted hisses and my laughter. There were probably people staring, but that didn’t matter.

Maybe I could talk Trrili into a dance-off afterward. On whatever was left when one of us was declared the champion of small-scale, sanctioned violence.

~~~

These are the ongoing backstory adventures of the main character from this book.

Shared early on Patreon! There’s even a free tier to get them on the same day as the rest of the world.

The sequel novel is in progress (and will include characters from these stories. I hadn’t thought all of them up when I wrote the first book, but they’re too much fun to leave out of the second).

[flokali]

♢ Worship | Zhongli

Warnings: AFAB! Reader, Non/con -> Dub/con, Mind break (MC), Yandere, Cult AU, isekai, past violence towards MC, patronizing behavior towards MC, penetration, fingering, delusional behavior/thoughts from Zhongli, cum is everywhere, unprotected sex, dumbification (MC) (kind of), dirty talk, use of the c^nt, manipulation of MC, repetition, cock-drunk MC, desperate Zhongli, degradation towards MC (slut, liar, whore), implied exhibitionism, implied s.ex between MC and other Archons, unrealistic sex. Ask to tag!

Roles: Top! Dom! Zhongli | Bottom ! Reader

A/N: Here it is... it's definitely something new for me;; It's absolutely not for everyone and I am begging you to read the warnings, if this is too much for you do not read it! It's 100% fictional and falls under Dead Dove / Dark Content: it is not meant for anyone under the age of 18. Anon, ILY and you're the best... my beloved ! Took me forever to get this out, but here it is... yipe >_<

Word Count: 5.2k !

— Minors do NOT interact —

You were shunned away and hurt by those who you had once loved.

Already weak and alone, it was as if they took joy in seeing you despair, as if the way you crumbled around them was entertaining.

It hurts, oh Heavens above, you were miserable.

It wasn’t just physical, it was emotional and mental as well – every single weakness you possessed was exploited until you became a shell of yourself, your mind and body governed by fear and hatred and a need to survive, because you needed to survive. Even if it meant being reborn anew, you couldn’t let them win.

You couldn’t bring yourself to forget, it was all too painful, too cruel, too unjustified; they drove you to your limits and pushed you further until you broke. Until the person looking at you in the mirror looked like you, spoke like you, thought like you, but didn’t feel like you.

It’s why you couldn’t forgive the man standing in front of you, because deep down you knew he would have killed you if given the chance back then. You knew he held no regrets, that he’d do it all again to the next person who committed the crime of being deemed unworthy.

“I cannot,” your voice was assertive, or at least as assertive as you could muster in front of a God, “I… refuse to forgive you.”

“Please be reasonable,” Zhongli begs of you as he approaches you slowly, like a hunter would its prey, even if he claimed to think himself bellow you - you knew he held more power than you “we had no idea – I had no idea… if we’d known earlier, I swear upon Liyue Harbor itself, things would’ve been different.”

“And yet, time runs forwards,” you reply, slowly walking further away from the approaching man, or at least attempting to, but it was no use as he quickly makes his way closer to you, long legs and fit frame having no qualms in cornering you, “I have no use for ‘what if's’ or ‘could be’s’ - what is done is done, we have nothing to talk about, now let me leave because this is getting ridiculous.”

“My god is so stubborn,” he chuckles, acting as if your words meant little to him, something that greatly confused you - he spoke highly of you and yet seemed to think lowly of your person -, “I am afraid I don’t yet know if that’s something I like or not,” he mumbles that last part to himself before addressing you once more, “alas, I cannot let you leave until we reach a suitable agreement, your grace, you’re clearly not thinking clearly if you don’t see the multiple benefits that having me as your servant shall bring; with me by your side, you may as well be unstoppable.”

You scoff, a sense of disdain flows through your veins as you glare at him; you were slowly growing agitated by him and his presence, “First, you claim I’m your God and now you speak of me as an equal, as if I needed you - as if you had a right to speak to me at all -, what is it, Zhongli?”

He says nothing, his eyes take you in, you both know you’re cornered with nowhere to run, with you now completely at his mercy. It reminded you of the times he’d hunt you down with the intent to kill, if you were honest you much preferred the way he looked down at you back then than the current look in his eyes as he judged you with his eyes, as if assessing how worthy you were of his time albeit claiming servitude and humbleness before you.

“How utterly foolish, how… cute.” He chuckles, now only a mere inches away from your face. You hadn’t even noticed the stones he’d raised from the ground caging and forcing you into his proximity.

His hands, cold as they were, find their way to your cheeks. You attempt to swat his hand away but he’s simply too fast, quickly gathering both of your limbs and forcing them against his chest; the position was uncomfortable as you were forced to look up at his larger frame and feel his toned chest, a strange feeling was brewing in your lower region you desperately tried to ignore.

“Of course, you’re my God,” he says, his words serious, he spoke with such conviction it made your skin crawl, “and I’m your humble servant, which is why I am begging you to reconsider your opinion on not only myself but my people as well.”

“Absolutely not.” You accentuate your words, even if they come out a bit muffled from the way he gripped your face, to make your point loud and clear.

“Very well then, you leave me no choice,” he smiles and it sends a shiver down your spine because nothing good has ever come from someone smiling at you like that, “if you won’t let me worship you, then I’ll have to do it by force.”

His lips crash into yours but he makes no move to withdraw his hand from your cheeks, instead he uses it to press deeper into you - as if attempting to consume you whole.

You have no idea how long he’d been kissing you for, all you know is that his lips were devouring your own and that his tongue was battling with yours for control over your own mouth. The hand that grasped your wrist guided your hand to caress the archon’s chest, over his hardening nipples and around his pecs. There’s short intervals between kisses, but he doesn’t properly pull away until you’re begging for him to let you take in oxygen.

“Ah…” Zhongli finally pulls away to breathe, you’re in shock as you look at him, pure anger running through your veins, a complete contrast to the blissful look in his face as a blush overtakes his godly features, “You taste… divine.”

Ridiculous, Zhongli was being completely and utterly ridiculous! Making a joke, and a poor one at that, at a moment like this where he was doing this to you was incredulous. You wanted to scream at him, forcefully make him understand that you didn’t want him nor his sick worship and yet your body easily made way for him to slot his lips against yours once more as he parted them with a squeeze of your cheeks.

“Mhm~” You can’t help the moan that escapes your lips as you feel his tongue enter your mouth once more, “Ah, hmgh… humgh!”

Your back is flat against the wall, the Lord of Geo’s body effectively caging you in, and you have no choice but to part your legs as he places his knee between your own. You can barely breathe properly as he attacks your mouth, as if he’s making sure to explore it until he could map it out, his groping hand that had now left your cheeks and teasing touches don’t help at all as you feel yourself grow dizzy with unwanted arousal, a feeling shimmering in your pussy that has you unconsciously bucking your hips into his strong and firm limbs.

“You look so much better like this, Your grace,” he says as he takes a breather, his eyes – eyes you once adored back when you were home – glowed with arousal as he looked you up and down, “so quiet and docile, so obedient, it makes me want to eat you whole.”

“Rex Lapis! How dare you – ah, ha~ah!” You’re about to scold him and speak up when you break into yet another moan, you almost go cross-eyed as you feel his knee tease your neglected crotch; the cloth of his robes create a texture that feels heavenly against your hardening clit.

“Hmm? What is it, your highness?” He asks, feigning innocence as if he wasn’t the man responsible for your aroused state, “If you wish me to stop, speak up now before I get too, ah, excited.”

Zhongli once again doesn’t give you time to respond before he’s attacking your neck with fluttering kisses, “Come on, if you want me to stop,” he mumbled hungrily, it’s almost brutish the way he handles your body forcing jolts of arousal and pleasure to spark through your body, “say so.”

He’s challenging you to speak up, it’s as if he’s daring you to tell him to stop. He knows, the sick bastard knows that somewhere deep inside you - you still adore and want him, that a sick part of you wants to forgive him and be loved by him.

“Mora-ah~ !” You moan as he sucks at a particularly sensitive spot in your neck, his hands teasingly run across your thighs, caressing the skin in a seductive manner that has you trying to close your legs. Your core is slotted near his knee, where he can teasingly bump it up against it to give you momentary sparks of pleasure.

You want to scream at him to quit toying with you but you can’t formulate the words, not with the soft whimpers and groans you were letting out. He gives you a particularly strong bump, one where your clit — which was growing more sensitive by the second — and his clothed knee come into direct contact. You let out a particularly high pitched moan at that, the feel of his muscle against your lower lips simply intoxicating, that has Zhongli responding with a grunt of his own, something that sounded like your name rumbling from deep inside his throat.

“Such a slut for me,” he manages to get out, he’d been too busy teasing your skin with his teeth to comment on anything for a while, “such a good whore…”

It felt demeaning to be talked down to like that, especially by someone who claimed to wish to become your humble servant, but his words had a primal part of you beaming with satisfaction at being called good. You’re so taken aback by your own reaction you don’t notice him tugging at your robes and undergarments, not until he’s freed your cunt - allowing it to come in contact with the air.

“There we go,” he praises you, finally detaching himself from your neck, which was now littered with bruises and hickies, “your grace, I am truly honored… to be the first of your followers to make love to you…”

There’s a sick, almost delusional, look on his face as he breaks into a soft grin as he palmed your cunt, thick fingers gathering the slick that slowly poured out of your cute hole as it desperately tried grasping at anything.

His hand parts your legs further so he gains better access to your cunt, before he takes his free hand to properly caress your nerves. Slow and sensual movements against your clit and slit have you desperately bucking your hips to meet his fingers, he never inserts a full digit up your gummy walls instead opting to slowly work the opening by stretching your entrance and fingering you only up until his dip joint. Your arousal soon is leaking down your thighs and hitting the floor, making a mess of cum and love juice that would’ve made even the Devil blush, even the amount that escaped your soaking hole surprised, was it normal to be aroused enough to leak into the floor, you wondered.

“You’re ready,” you break out of the hazy mist of lust that clouded your mind as soon as you hear the man speak, “hah… I’ll… I’ll stick it in now, your grace… I’ll make sure to fill you up.”

“What…?” You manage to pant out, but he doesn’t answer you - instead he opts to free his hardened cock from beneath his clothes, a thick and long monster that sends a shiver down your spine as you questioned how he even thought someone could take it without hours of prep beforehand, and directs it towards your soaking entrance, “Z-Zhongli… don’t, please… you’re too big and… I’m not, I’m not ready… please, don’t… I’ll forgive you if you stop, stop! Just please, no… stop, I… I’m sorry, I…”

He pays your begging no mind as he slots his tip inside of your hole, which is enough to have you desperately clawing at his arms; “Hah, your highness… we - we’re becoming one…”

The Lord of Geo decides to ignore you, opting instead to slowly sink himself further into your gummy walls, even with the previous preparation and the slick you’d released your cunt was gasping in pain as you felt his thick dick enter your poor, tight pussy; before you knew it you were practically spasming around his length, awkwardly jolting and jumping as his cock slowly made its way past your tight muscles. The pleasant burn and torturous slow pace has you gasping and rolling your eyes towards the back of your head; he’s not even completely inside of you and you feel so… full. You don’t even want to imagine what it’d be like to have all of him inside you.

“Hah~ Hah,” you hear him pant beside your ear, his hot breath making you shiver, “you’re… tight…”

Your face is heating up at his words, it doesn’t help he’s slowly pressing himself deeper into your hole nor that he is slowly grinding himself against your walls in an attempt to ease your tense body.

“You’re t-too big…” You miraculously manage to get his hands off of you, “Fuck, get off… please… g-hgkh! ”

You trail off, too focused on the pleasure at hand to finish your thoughts. You didn’t want this, you didn’t want to have his dick inside you and yet your body sucked him in so greedily. You’re shaking and panting by the time he finally bottoms out, his balls hitting the fat of your ass with a soft thud that made your walls momentarily tighten at the lewd and erotic sound, it was too much and yet you were beginning to grow fond of the feeling of his cock bulging against your stomach.

Zhongli lets you sit on his dick for a while, allowing you to get accustomed to the feeling of fullness, probably trying to get used to the feeling of your warm walls encasing his dick, you try to pull him off you one last time but he doesn’t even budge, he’s too big, in retaliation, he gives a smooth roll of his hips that has his cock rubbing against every nook and cranny inside of you, including your special, spongy spot that had you seeing stars.

“U-ugh…” You let out a gurgle, you don’t want to admit it but the way his dick felt inside you had you seeing Celestia.

It’s the realization that he had no intention of letting you go un-fucked, and the shame of feeling aroused, that has you finally releasing the death grip you’d had on his arms, a sense of defeat and humiliation settled in your stomach; to preserve any reminder of your dignity it’s best you just let him use your hole like a toy. You’d denounce him, obviously, once the act was done and you’d have him sentenced, hopefully, to death for defiling you - that’s truly the only comfort you have.

It seems he takes your now compliant state as a go ahead to start moving. It’s painful at first, you’re overly aware of how his cock is moving inside of you and the feeling of pleasure is almost completely overshadowed by hatred and humiliation, your companion, however, seemed to be enjoying himself. You’re certain this whole event would be uncomfortable and unpleasant, you doubt you’ll even finish, or at least, you did until a particular thrust hit a particularly sensitive nerve that sent an aggressive wave of pleasure coursing through your veins, it’s blinding, it quite literally took your breath away as your brain struggled to process the unexpected yet erogenous sensation.

“S-shit!” You gasp, your whole body twitching. For a second, all thoughts left your mind, only a primal need to feel good again taking over as the wave rocked through your body, infiltrating every nerve and muscle, coursing through your brain as you desperately tried to prolong the almost intoxicating sensation. You don’t even realize how tightly your cunt is clutching his dick until he lets out a condescending, deep laugh.

“D-did you feel good, your highness?” His breath hits your ear and you suddenly feel overstimulated from your recent release and the feeling of his burning skin encasing you.

His words bring you back to reality and you have to restrain yourself from biting a chunk of his skin, you’re still trying to come back from your high, a high you desperately wanted to deny; “A-as if, hah, a monster-r such as yourself could pleasure me… f-fuck!”

“Is that a challenge, your grace,” he asks, golden eyes narrowing in amusement, , “if so,” he adjust your position, suddenly your legs are no long touching the floor as he’s taken them into his arms, his hands hold your knees so you can’t fall nor escape his brutal thrusts, you’re at his mercy, “I won't back down.”

That’s the start to an agonizing pace, one where he’d give deep, sensual thrust into your pussy - he’d start of slow, making sure you felt every vein and bump that made up his cock -, and then pick up the pace momentarily with short yet precise, rapid thrusts that had you bouncing in his arms like a rag doll.

“Do you like it, my beloved?” He lets out as he desperately tries to coax a confession of pleasure out of your lips, keenly aware of the way your insides became harder to exit the more aroused you were, “If, ha-ah, if I pleasure you like this everyday, you surely will forgive me, r-right?”

You’re too preoccupied with the way Zhongli’s hardened length rubbed a particular spot inside your walls that had your legs tensing helplessly in his grasp to answer; you could feel a ball of uncomfortable pleasure build up in your lower region that had you panting the more it grew.

Your thoughts were slipping away as the man lowered his hand to toy with your hardened clit, you felt like you were about to cum from that ministration alone but you helplessly try to stop yourself; you’re certain that if you cum even once you’d completely lose yourself, it was already hard enough not to beg for him to stop teasing you and fuck you properly as it was, and you’re certain that the minute your slick coats his dick, you won’t be able to stop yourself from begging to be fucked like an animal in heat. But it was so hard, so terribly hard, especially when he began kissing and teasing the hickies he’d previously painted over your body, the added feeling of your clit being rubbed as your cunt was being pounded into in different rhythms had you bucking your hips to meet his own - even a second without his cock inside of you was becoming unbearable, you… you needed his dick, you needed to feel good.

You wanted to sob from the frustration of the never ceasing pleasure that was building inside you, you wanted to cum so bad you were growing desperate, not even realizing your hips had begun moving on their own in an attempt to hurry up your release. You don’t think you’ve ever been so sexually frustrated, continuously growing restless as your head began clouding from pleasure.

It’s as if he was reading your mind because as soon as the thought hits you, he moves near your ear to moan in a low voice; “Go ahead, my love, cum for me… just know that if you do, I’ll take it as an invitation to become yours… Come on, make this dick yours, I… ha-ah… I know you want to.”

Wasn’t that so lovely? Wasn’t that such a wonderful agreement; in exchange for your slick, you would have one of the greatest cocks in the continent as your own personal servant!

Because it was what you deserved right? After all those months of pain and hurt, you deserved to feel good and be loved like you always were meant to be loved.

Zhongli notices your apprehension and he doesn’t blame you, but he was going to make things right; he had to, no matter what, no matter how, no matter what it takes, he will make it up to you. Even if it meant lowering himself from the status of Archon, even if he had to apologize and beg.

“I’m so sorry,” he begins mumbling into your skin as his cock keeps abusing your hole, he knows it’s an underhanded method but he doesn’t care, he meant every word he said - even if his way of showing his feelings was wrong, “you didn’t deserve any of it, no… y-you should be worshiped, you’re – fuck! You’re my savior, you’re everything to me, everything… I love you, I love you, I-I’m y-yours,” your cunt unwillingly clenches at that, “I-I’m yours to do as you please… you’re so good to me, so good… Come on, cum on me, use my cock… Allow me to repent for my actions, you will - won’t you?”

As one of his hands continues to rub your clit, the other supports your body weight, he doesn’t even seem to break a sweat as he holds you and fucks himself silly inside your tightening cunt.

There’s something about his desperate tone, the way he whines into your skin in between kisses and sucking, that has you believing his words; maybe he was regretful, maybe he did see what he did wrong, he was clearly trying to make it up for you by having sex with you, right? This was okay, right? He was sincere, you both knew he held a deep hatred for his actions, he’d been begging to see you ever since he’d learn of your true identity, he’d sent you gifts and offerings in an attempt to swing your favor; Rex Lapis didn’t do that for anyone, Zhongli didn’t do that for anyone.

He kept going on and on about how sorry he was, how desperate he was to feel you cum on his cock, how badly he wanted to serve you, how much you meant to him, how everything he ever did was for you; he loved you, he needed you, he wanted to be with you, he needed to be with you. His voice was growing raspy and whiny, a completely new side to the normally composed and cool Zhongli you were used to.

His words begin to seep into your brain, his admissions of guilt, his declarations of love, the way he begged you to take him as your own.

“I-I feel your pussy tighten,” he mumbles, “you’re so… you feel so good, mhm… I’ll be yours, I’ll make it up to you, everything – Please, s-shit, let me be yours, I want to be yours, allow me to serve you, I love you, I love you, I love you, I love you, I love you, I love you.”

“Zh-zhongli…”

“Your grace,” he moans and you can feel the way his body shudders as you whimper his name, “I’ll do anything for you, please - please, ha~ah?! Make me yours, let’s cum together, please, I want to cum inside you, I want you to come… If I make you cum, you’ll let me serve you, right? M-my lord, mine, mine… I’ll claim you as mine, my own god, only m-mine, mhm-mmph… I’ll make it up to you, you’ll be mine, you’ll love me, you’ll love me-ah, we’ll do this e-everyday a-and you’ll be mine, hah~”

You felt the last of yourself break as the words he whispered made your cunt squirt all over the Archon, the one who’d hunted you for sport, made your life a living hell, who’d offered his body and power as an apology; he now stood with his hips and pelvis covered in your cum.

“C-cumming! Ah, ah-hah… I’m cumming, ‘m cumming, shit! I’m cumming on your c-cock! Hah, hah… ah~ah, ghk-k!”!

Yet you couldn’t stop, your poor pussy kept leaking as you convulsed from the intensity. It didn’t help that Zhongli made a point of pressing himself as deeply as he could inside of your pussy, as if trying to penetrate your womb with the tip of cock.

It’s as if your body had been lit on fire, your body twitches and turns as you gush all over the floor, it’s an electrifying feeling as you give up control and succumb to pleasure.

Cock, you were cumming on Zhongli’s cock, on the man who wanted you dead only a few weeks ago, you were on his cock, his cock was inside you, your cum was coating his cock - the cock that was humping your pussy, the man who was groping you, the one who’s threatened to kill you. You could only think about his cock, the big, long, thick, fat cock that had you drooling over yourself. You didn’t know what was leaking out of your pussy, it kept coming and coming out, coating the Archon’s lower half with your love juices - your legs hurt as you tensed and twitched and your nipples and clit all felt painfully hard.

It takes you a few seconds to stop cumming and yet, even as you were held in his arms panting from the feeling, you weren’t tired – in fact, you don’t think you’d ever felt better.

It seemed the man balls deep inside of you was feeling the same way for it doesn’t even take him more than a minute to start bouncing your limp body on his cock once more.

“More… I want more, more, wanna… wanna cum again.” You’re too out of it to realize you were speaking your thoughts, too desperate and drunk on the feeling of sex and the pleasure it was bringing you to feel shame.

Even though your body felt heavy as lead, you weakly try to match the rhythm set by Zhongli with your hips, desperately searching for the pleasure he’d given you minutes before.

If you’d been looking at his face, you would have been able to see the look of surprise that washed over his handsome features; was this really you? Had it truly only taken you a good fuck to temper you out? His golden eyes seem to glow brighter as his excitement grows, his dick somehow hardening even more albeit still being inside of your warmth. He takes it as a sign to adjust your body one more time, taking you in his arms once more and allowing him to bounce you on his cock like a toy.

You’re too sex-brained to fully comprehend what was going on, only truly thinking with your cunt - desperate to feel the white ball of pleasure explode inside of you once more and to feel Zhongli coat your insides with his cum.

“Ha-ah, Zhongli,” you whine, your voice comes out airy and unsteady as your whole body bounces on his dick, “p-please… c-cum inside me! ‘Wanna feel your cum inside my pussy, pl- fuck! Ah, ah - feels good, your cock feels so good! ‘m gonna cum again, wanna cum with you… hah, hah, l-let’s cum together…!”

You can feel his breath hit your neck as he nuzzles into into your shoulder, an airy chuckle soon followed by teasing words;

“I-I, hmm… I thought you’d never f-feel pleasure from a monster such as myself,” his voice is raspy as if he were barely containing himself, “my grace is such a g-greedy liar…”

As if to prove his point he gives you a particularly rough thrust, one that has you seeing black as your eyes roll back from the pleasure.

“P-please… I want your cum inside of me, ghk! Want your cum, wanna feel your cum on my pussy, wanna be your… your, wanna…! Fuck, you feel s-sho’ good, so go~oh~od, aha, ahhhh…!?”

“Don’t worry, my beloved,” he breathes out, hurrying the pace of his hips, he never fully removes his cock from you, instead opting for shallow thrusts that are aided by the length and girth he possesses, “my only wish… is to serve you.”

You can’t even respond as one hand comes to massage your breast and the other lowers itself to play with your clit, the added ministrations have you panting and desperately grinding yourself against the Archon; your body felt like it was on fire from the heat that bloomed from where your two bodies became one.

“‘M close, ‘m gonna cum inside you.”

Those are the only words you have to brace yourself before hot, sticky cum is shot inside your aching body, painting your pink insides white with his depraved love. He doesn’t say anything, his own brain seemingly turned into mush, only capable of low groans and moans that border on animalistic while he made sure to press himself as deep as he humanly could, making sure that not a drop of the cum you’d asked for escaped your greedy hole.

As he rides off his high, emptying his balls inside of you as he softly rocked your body, you can feel your sex clench and slick begin to ooze out of your cute hole. He notices it, and begins rubbing your clit in an attempt to coax you into cumming for him. His finger feels heavenly as he rubs it in quick, fluid motions across your clit and vulva, the cum from your previous release and the overflowing left overs from his own aid you as your feet begin to curl and a ball of pleasure that had been growing inside your lower half finally explodes and you cum one more time on Zhongli’s cock.

Albeit not nearly as sudden nor shocking as the first one, you’re still left a twitchy and aching mess as your legs fall limp in your captor’s arms.

But after tonight, your brain could hardly process him as a threat, everything before the second he’d inserted his dick inside you felt like a distant nightmare, the man who now cradled your body was no longer your enemy - not now, not to you. Your eyelids feel heavy and you’re beginning to doze off as you feel a sloppy kiss be left on your cheek, you look up at Zhongli for the first time since he’d started to fuck you.

His pale skin is burning pink, sweat rolls off his handsome features, his lips look rosy pink and you can see faint bites on them from when he desperately contained his moans, he looked nothing like the God who’d terrorized you previously; his eyes were the easiest give away, however, where they once were full with hatred and disgust, they now shined with passion and servitude.

In his mind, he’d earned your forgiveness, the debauched act of taking you against your will was his last ditch attempt at making things right, and so from today onwards, in his perturbed mind, he was officially your first follower in the continent of Teyvat and most devout worshiper.

“Mhm…” A smile blooms on his lips as he squeezes your ass, the geo wall vanished and you’re left clinging to Zhongli as he adjusts his cock inside of you, the soft movement has you jumping from overstimulation, your sex drunk look endears the Archon as he duly noted his guests’ footsteps approaching, “let’s show them how to properly serve you, shall we?”’

[amournoir]

Hi gorgeous, could you do a second part of Shadows of Doubt where reader is pregnant with Hope and spending time with Hayley who's a good friend of hers. Elijah and Rebekah realize they were being assholes because she's exactly what their brother needed, Klaus misses her and wants her back, though once he finds out about her pregnancy everything gets more angsty, as he blames his siblings for it, believing yn had moved on not knowing the child was his and etc. They get back together at the end, with a lot of fluff and etc.

𝐬𝐡𝐚𝐝𝐨𝐰𝐬 𝐨𝐟 𝐝𝐨𝐮𝐛𝐭 ┄ 𝐢𝐢

pairing: niklaus mikaelson x f!reader

count: 1.5k

warning: slight angst + fluff

author’s note: after several requests and messages, here’s part 2 of shadows of doubt (here’s part 1). i hope you enjoy it like you guys did the first one! 🫶🏽

It had been weeks since I last cried and almost four months since I last saw him. It was the most painful thing I had ever done but I knew it had to happen, there was no need to make the situation more difficult. I walked away. No goodbye or anything. I wasn’t going to let his siblings have the satisfaction of seeing me ‘weak’ as they often told me.

The gentle breeze rustled the leaves as I sat in the courtyard of my home, my fingers unconsciously tracing the subtle curve of my belly. The soft flutter of life within me was a constant reminder of the precious gift growing inside. It had been a whirlwind of emotions since that day— the day I had found out I was pregnant with her. She wasn’t planned but she’d be wanted, if not by him then me, she was my miracle…my hope.

In the months I had spent away from him and his family, I had met people. Amongst them was a woman called Hayley, she had become my closest confidante and friend. She sat beside me, her gaze understanding and supportive. “How are you feeling, Y/N?” she asked softly.

I smiled, the love and excitement for the life within me radiating through my words. “It's strange, but in a beautiful way. I feel this little one moving, and it's like she's already a part of me.”

Hayley's eyes softened, and she placed a comforting hand on my shoulder. “You're going to be an amazing mother, Y/N.”

As I looked around the courtyard, memories of him flooded my mind. His charming smile, his passionate love, and the painful distance that had grown between us. I couldn't help but wonder if he was thinking about me, if he ever missed the moments we had shared. Little did I know, he was wrestling with his own demons, haunted by the realization that he had let go of something precious. Elijah and Rebekah, his once-disapproving siblings, had opened his eyes to the truth— that my absence had left a void in his life.

One evening, as the sun dipped below the horizon, Klaus stood outside the balcony, his heart heavy with regret. The memories of time spent together played like a filmstrip in his mind, each moment a painful reminder of what he had lost. He swirled the glass in his hand around, mindlessly watching it.

Elijah approached the open balcony doors and stood still, his voice gentle but firm. “Niklaus, we’d like for you to hear us out. You can’t go on like this anymore brother.”

Klaus was silent for a while then with a huff he said, “Very well, say your piece.”

“We were wrong. I apologize for the part I played in hurting Y/N. You need to go to her.”

His back was still turned, facing the city in front of him. His jaw clenched and unclenched, his voice sounding venomous. “You do not tell me what I need Elijah.”

“Then tell me what I can do.” Elijah removed his hand from his pocket, waving it in front of him.

“What I needed you to. I needed you to stand by me and support us…you made me choose.” His voice cracked at that last sentence as he spun around to face his older brother.

Elijah's expression softened, his concern for his brother evident. “It's not too late, Niklaus. Reach out to her, before it truly is.”

“This was your doing! You and Rebekah!”

“We’re sorry for doubting her Nik, alright? Is that what you want to hear?” Rebekah yelled back at her brother. She had been silently watching and listening from the door.

“What I wanted was her and you drove her away!” He throws his glass of liquor across the room, the bottle following quickly behind.

Rebekah flinched and shut her eyes as she whispered, “Nik we’re sorry.”

“Go to her brother. We will not fail you again.” Elijah extended his hand out to him and Klaus gave it a firm shake. With a nod, they reached a silent agreement.

Without a word, Klaus left to his room to think it over. He knew he could never gain her trust again after letting her go so easily. He often used his art room to conjure up his master plans but not this time. In a few hours he had decided and that was how he found himself standing outside my door, his heart pounding as he raised his hand to knock. He hesitated, the weight of his emotions holding him back. The door swung open, and there I stood, the sight of him taking my breath away. For a moment, time seemed to stand still, and the unspoken words hung heavy in the air.

“Y/N,” he finally said, his voice a mix of longing and regret.

“Klaus,” I replied softly, my heart racing.

“I missed you love,” he admitted, his voice vulnerable. His hand reached out to me, gently placing it on my cheek.

I looked into his eyes, the depth of his emotions mirrored mine. “I missed you too, Klaus. But things are different now.”

The silence between us spoke volumes, a symphony of emotions that echoed the pain of our separation and the hope for a second chance. As our gazes held, a sense of understanding passed between us. I wanted nothing more than to stand there and take it all in, take in the sight of him. Call it weakness or strength but in that moment I needed to be honest so I revealed the truth.

“I'm pregnant,” I whispered, tears welling in my eyes.

Klaus's expression shifted from surprise to confusion, and then to anger. “You moved on so quickly?” he snapped, his voice laced with bitterness. He pulled back as though my touch burned him.

I shook my head, the tears spilling over. Desperately, I took a step forward to be closer once more, “No, it’s yours. Our child, Nik.”

He couldn’t believe it and I wouldn’t blame him, he didn’t know. Ten years ago I triggered my curse and quickly learned a few things, one of them being scent. A witch that was a family friend offered to hide it as a way to thank me for saving her children. From that day onwards, I could smell other wolves but none knew my scent which hid me from supernaturals alike. Klaus never knew, I would have told him one day but after realizing I’d never gain his siblings' trust and the constant doubts from him, I kept my secret.

Still even with my revelation, he was partially in the dark. If I had any chance of convincing him, I needed to tell him the entire truth. I placed one hand over my abdomen and looked at him, tears falling freely. I knew in the silence he’d hear it. Time seemed to have slowed in that moment as I saw his face morph into different stages of understanding.

The realization hit him like a tidal wave, his anger giving way to shock and disbelief. “What?”

I took a step closer, my hand gently caressing my belly. “Hope. She's ours, Nik.”

“How?” His voice was small, almost child-like, though his gaze remained on my abdomen.

With my free hand, I reached down for his and placed it on the side of my head. I wanted him to know everything, I wanted him to trust me fully which is why I let him inside my mind. “See for yourself.”

Moments later tears glistened in his eyes as he looked at me, his heart torn between regret and joy. “I can't believe I doubted you,” he whispered.

As he reached out to touch my belly, his fingers gentle against my skin, I felt a rush of emotions—love, forgiveness, and the chance for a future together. This was all I had wanted. Right here, I had all that I could ever ask for and I’d be damned if I let it go without a fight. He was my home.

“Love I'm truly sorry. I don’t deserve you,” he murmured, his voice thick with emotion.

I smiled through my tears, feeling the weight of the past lifting from my shoulders. “Klaus, we have a chance to start again—for Hope and for us.”

“Hope?”

“You don’t like it? We can pick something else.” I quickly said, worried I had already done something wrong.

He leaned forward and placed a soft kiss on my forehead then looked down at my belly. “No, I love it.” His fingers moved around in slow circles and I could feel her inside me as she pressed closer to him. “Hope Althea Mikaelson.”

I let out a soft gasp, immediately looking up at him. “Althea?”

“She’ll take after her mother, it’s only right she has your name as well.” He lifted my hand with his free one and kissed the knuckles, adding “I vow to never leave either of you. We will be a family sweetheart.”

And in that moment, as one hand rested against his growing daughter and the other on me, I knew that the shadows of doubt that had once clouded our hearts were finally dissipating. As we embraced, a sense of utter completeness settled over us, a promise of love and a future that would forever be intertwined. I was back home and soon our greatest Hope would join us.

🏷️ taglist:

⤷ @mrs-maximoff-kenner @thatfanficstuff @elijahmikaelsontrash @mxacegrey @thatfictionalwh0re @catmikaelson20 @loverswillowed @panic-at-the-fiction @iiskittles16ii @original-siphon @hellotvshowtrash @onlyfreds @onlyfredslibrary @imgoingtofreakoutnow @slinthoex @i-love-nora @multiversediaries @decoffinated-vamps @hopester08 @aloneatpeace @hopes-wife @softcoremaybank @klaustopia @dreamingwithrafe @sweetestdesire @cottontears @cottonreads @buckyysdoll @spnandtvdudeservedbetter @impossibleheartflower @madetragic @spike-and-angels-gf

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[belovedwhore]

pretty boy pt 3

ethan landry x reader

warnings: smut, little bit of plot, oral (m!receiving), lowkey sub ethan

notes: hey y’all here’s pt3, i hope this is better than pt2 and ik it seem like the reader not getting much but trust she gon get hers soon, i already have an idea for it so just stay tuned! also i will be writing other smut for ethan that is separate from this series so stay tuned for that too. thanks for all the love and welcome new followers!!! anyways enough chit chat hope you enjoy!

pt 1 , pt 2 , pt 3 , pt 4 , pt 5 , pt 6

—————————��——————————————

the morning after. you woke up before ethan just admiring the sleeping boy laid next to you, thinking about last night. something about him got you and he’s all you want. couple minutes after you woke up he began to stir, looking over at you as if you were a dream.

“good morning pretty boy,” you greeted.

“good morning,” he rasped in his morning voice. god if he was gonna sound like that in the mornings we’d be doing something different right now.

“what’d you think of last night,” you asked.

“it was great,” he blushed clearly reliving the events of last night.

“good, would you wanna do it more?”

“oh right now,-” he perked starting to sit up on the bed.

“easy there pretty boy,” you laughed, “i meant generally but i’ll just be taking that as a yes.”

“ohhh ok yea, definitely a yes,” he added, “imma go grab a shower, i’ll be right back.

he got up from the bed and walked around to your side, kissing you briefly before leaving the bedroom. you laid looking at the ceiling for a bit, thinking about last night once again. your thoughts were interrupted by a knock at the door,

“back already?” you called out.

“it’s me sex demon,” you heard tara say as she opened the door, “making sure you’re decent, god knows if you have clothes on after last night.”

“oh no were we loud?” you asked.

“no just the occasional ‘oh my god ethan’ ,” she faked moaned, “and can’t forget about the ‘oh oh oh my god,” in her best ethan voice.

“oh god, i can’t,” you covered your face with your hands, peeking through you started, “wait what about you and chad, anything happen?”

“nada, kinda a turn off when you and ethan are over here fucking like it’s your last day on earth.”

“ok we didn’t fuck yet just some… other stuff.”

“mmhmm, well you might wanna get out of sam’s room before she gets up here because she definitely thought you were in my room.”

“oh shit you’re right,” you said getting up off the bed and heading over to tara’s room.

as you walked to tara’s room you heard the shower running and knew ethan was in there.

“i have to get something from the bathroom.”

“ethan’s in there,” she stated.

you didn’t answer, just smiled as you walked backwards to the bathroom. tara flicked you off jokingly as you entered quickly and shut the door.

“hello,” you heard ethan call out from behind the curtain, “chad i swear to god if you’re trying to scare me right now-“

“not chad.”

poking his head out of the shower he saw you sitting there on the bathroom counter, “oh hey, i’m almost done in here so you should be good.”

“it’s hot as fuck in here,” you told him as you drew shapes on the mirror.

you heard him turn the faucet off and saw him reach out to grab his towel, “yea i usually take hot showers.”

he stepped out of the shower with the towel wrapped low on his waist, revealing his v-line. his hair was still curly, resting on his head like a mop. you beckoned him closer with your hand. as he came more within your reach you grab his hand and pulled him closer to you, kissing him passionately. he melted into the kiss, allowing you to take control. as he moaned you slipped your tongue into his mouth, tasting him completely unable to get enough. your hands drifted to his wet hair while his went to your waist drawing you forward, closer to him. you tangled your hands in his curls, pulling at them making him groan into the kiss. as he pulled you closer you felt his growing length against your core, he grinded against you, giving you both some kind of release. suddenly you had a thought. pushing him back slightly you hopped off the counter onto the ground without disconnecting your lips. ethan’s back was now against the counter while you stood in front of him. you kissed him harder, now palming his cock hidden under the towel.

you separated your lips, moving to kiss down his body instead. you kissed down the middle of his chest, swiping across his nipples with your tongue. ethan groaned continuously as you worked your way down, head rolling back in pleasure. next you got to his abs, tracing the ridges with your tongue all the way to his v-line. as you were kneeling in front of him now, you dropped his towel, freeing his now fully hard cock. ethan hissed as the air hit his exposed tip already leaking precum. you looked up at him as you began stroking his shaft,

“guessing you’ve never had a blowjob.”

he nodded his head as he couldn’t get any words out. you saw his jaw clench as you worked his cock, sliding your finger over his slit he bucked his hips into your hand, chasing a relief. finally you wrapped your mouth around the tip of his cock, swirling your tongue around it. his steps faltered as he gripped the counter, groaning at the unfamiliar feeling. you took him deeper into your throat, looking up at him struggling to contain himself. pulling your mouth off it, you pumped it more as your saliva covered the length. he squirmed beneath your touch, moaning as you stroked his shaft tightly. again you went in with your mouth, this time taking him deeper. as his tip hit the back of your throat he bucked his hips forward, causing you to gag around his cock,

“shit, i-i’m sorry i didn’t mean t-,” he rambled.

“it’s fine,” you assured him as you licked up the side of his cock, “i like it.”

as you palmed him in your hand you moved your mouth to his balls. as you sucked on one of them, ethan hit the counter with his palm, overcome with pleasure.

“is everything okay in there,” you heard someone call out from the hallway.

“yea, just uh dropped my shampoo,” he croaked.

“y-you’re gonna kill me,” he whispered, unable to raise his voice any higher due to his current state.

after you moved to the other, you resumed sucking his dick, lowering your mouth down until your nose tickled his pelvis then back up again. each time you lowered back down he came closer and closer to cumming, at this point basically whimpering under your touch, jaw clenched and eyes screwed shut.

“fuck,” he said breathlessly as his tip hit the back of your throat again.

and the next time you came down on his cock, he came hard. you felt his legs shaking as he emptied his load in your throat, jaw clenched, eyes screwed shut, and gripping the counter for dear life. you swallowed his load, milking him through his orgasm until you felt him trembling, overstimulated with his release.

you then stood up in front of him with the towel, hanging it to him you said, “you might wanna put this back on.”

quickly he grabbed your face, kissing you roughly, grabbing the curves of your ass as you moaned. it left you breathless.

“you uh- had something right there,” he joked as he wrapped his towel around his waist again.

“mm hmm, yea,” you played into it as you slipped out of the bathroom carefully, having to remain unseen.

[blessedwithabadomen]

in love with the mess - day zero

summary : Aubrey is going on tour and, for once, she's decided to focus on having as much fun as possible. Oli can be a little shit but he does nothing short of adore Audrey and... well, maybe Noah a little, too. Noah likes the flirting, as long as no one gets too close, emotionally. But what will happen when the three of them take it too far?

content : fluff

length : 3.2k

tags : @veronicaphoenix @cookiesupplier @lma1986 @jilliemiw86 @bngurngheart @lacktoesandtoddlerants @narcissisticbehavior81

a/n : hi everyone!! I hope you'll enjoy this, comments and reblogs and asks are always more than appreciated!!

•••

day zero

Time moved differently on tour. It always had, as long as I’d worked on them. Go away for a week and it’ll simultaneously feel like you only left home yesterday and as if you’ve been on the road for a month straight. 15 days didn’t seem too bad this time around. I’d done double that, triple that, easily. I basked in the feeling of how it fucked with time perception. Days flying by so fast I couldn’t quite grasp it, memories so fleeting and yet so fully anchored to my being. At the same time, in between, I already knew that I’d have days where this tour felt like a lifetime. Too many places in too little time, so many faces, different venues, different people, fans, the same setlists every night. And afterward, life wouldn’t be quite the same. Not this time around.

•••

“There she is!”

Oli’s voice was much too loud in the hotel lobby. Several people turned around, even if I wasn’t sure if it was because they recognised him or simply because they were questioning who was being so damn loud in this rather nice place. He crossed the room in long strides as I quickly gave the receptionist a nod while she handed over my room key.

He looked different than the last time I’d seen him in person, which, admittedly, had been… a while. There had been constant texting, a familiar voice in my ear whenever I needed it, video calls at any opportunity, all based on a friendship we’d both worked hard to grow over the last decade or so, but lately both of us had been busy on such opposing schedules that any in-person meetings got delayed and delayed again.

Whenever he was on the road, I was stuck at a job far away and when I was working on a different local tour, he was busy recording in a different country. It was why he made sure that now, when he was embarking on a massive arena tour with his band and I was miraculously free for all of January, he got me a job allowing me to tag along. It was so much more than I could ask for.

Still. It had been longer than I’d like to admit since the two of us had met in person and none of the pictures I’d been looking at or the video calls we’d been chatting through had done Oli Sykes any justice. He’d been hitting the gym, I knew that much, but the way he now filled out his frame had me giving him a once over as he approached. His hair was longer now, too. He looked healthier, I thought. Healthier and happier.

At least I wasn’t crushing on him anymore. I had spent a good few years with a special place in your heart reserved just for him, well aware that it had never been reciprocated. Nothing had ever happened, save a few harmless flirtations here and there. One of us had always been in a relationship, had someone else on their mind or simply enjoying their single life. It wasn’t like he’d be interested in me either way, I told yourself. And I was over all of that, even if both of us actually were available at the same time for once. It didn’t matter.

I greeted Oli with a smile as both of us immediately went for a hug. He’d always been a very touchy person, something that had been feeding my crush in the most unhealthy ways, but as someone who was also constantly in a state of touch starvation, I appreciated it either way. His arms held me tightly. I was convinced I could feel every individual muscle under my fingers as they traced his back and I just knew he was smiling into my hair as he rested his head on mine, his perfume engulfing me, and-

Yeah, fuck. I wasn’t over him. Like, at all.

I let go of him a little too abruptly, terrified he could feel the way my heart rate was speeding up, but he didn’t mention it. The weight of my realisation was hitting me hard.

I was going to have to spend the next two and a half weeks with him, as close as ever. And I was going to be crushing on him as much as ever. Great.

“Thank you for getting me on this tour,” I said anyway because truly, having someone basically fight to create a job for me just to make sure I could tag along and get paid for it out of pure friendship wasn’t something I was taking for granted. It wasn’t Oli’s fault my feelings weren’t under control.

“I’ll have you know that I missed three meetings to convince them that I needed a personal assistant to keep me on track.”

“Damn, so I’ll actually have to interact with you and make sure you are where you need to be at all times?” I joked.

“You also get to go on burger runs after the show. You’re basically my slave now.”

I decided to ignore the way his statement makes a shiver run down my spine. He didn’t need to know how far my services would extend, if he ever asked for it.

“Everyone in the tour group chat is making fun of me by the way. They’ve all very lovingly changed my contact name to ‘Oli’s slut’, so you’re not that far off.”

“Wait, there’s a groupchat I’m not part of?” Oli was halfway to pulling out his phone, apparently shocked at the idea that other people working this tour would connect without him being the centre of attention or even included at all, but he was interrupted.

The interruption came in the form of Noah Sebastian, tall, all smiles, and, somehow, even more beautiful in person than I’d gathered he would be from pictures and videos. One of his hands came to rest on Oli’s shoulder, making him look up with a bright smile, as the other reached out to me.

“Noah Sebastian,” he introduced himself, as if there was any chance I could possibly not be aware. “I sing in Bad Omens.”

“Hi! I’m Oli’s slut.” A brief pause. Panic as I gripped his hand tighter upon realising just which words had left my mouth. “No! Wait! Personal assistant! Oh my god. Aubrey. That’s my name.”

I couldn’t tell whose laughter was louder out of the two of them, but I was mortified. This was possibly the worst first impression I had ever made. And I’d made a lot of them.

“Where did you find her?” Noah laughed. “I like her already.”

Oli slung his arm around me, pressing my blushing face to his chest. I both wanted to burrow myself into the fabric of his hoodie and withdraw immediately before the heat in my cheeks got any worse.

“Oh, years ago, mate. She’s a keeper. A little socially inept though, obviously.”

“I fucking hate you,” I mumbled as I untangled myself from Oli. “I’m gonna go to my room and hide away until I’ve learned how to behave in public again.”

Grabbing my bag from off the floor and double checking that the key card I’d been handed hadn’t, somehow, vanished into the abyss, I turned to take the handle of my suitcase only to find it was already in Noah’s hand.

“I’m going to join you,” he said. I didn’t miss the way Oli raised his eyebrows. “In going upstairs, I mean, not going to your room. I’m… very jetlagged.”

“You two are a right pair,” Oli commented with a chuckle and a shake of his head. “This is going to be a great fucking tour.”

•••

“Is this the first tour you’re working on?”

I stopped at the door leading to my hotel room, Noah coming to a halt next to me and pushing my suitcase in my general direction. I was unreasonably nervous. Somehow, even though we were in a pretty public hallway in a pretty public hotel, no one else was around. I hadn’t counted on being alone with him so quickly, even if it was possibly the least conspicuous situation imaginable. Leaning back against the door, I fumbled with the keycard to keep my hands preoccupied.

“Oh no, I’ve done my fair share, actually. It’s how I met Oli, years ago, on one of the first jobs I ever had. I’ve mainly been doing merch or helping out as someone’s assistant, usually a tour manager’s. When he found out I was going to be free for this tour, he really wanted to get me on it, but they’d filled all positions already, so he convinced management that he needed a personal assistant. And here I am!”

“What’s that entail then? Your job? I might be in the business of hiring a personal assistant for myself, some time in the future.”

The way he was towering over me as he leaned against the wall, a smirk on his lips, eyes travelling over my face… was he flirting with me? I’d always been terrible at telling. Especially when it came to attractive people. There was a constant fear my interpretations could just be down to wishful thinking.

“Knowing Oli, it’s probably going to be a lot of running around to fetch him food and the most random assortments of items that he suddenly needs for no reason whatsoever. Other than that, I’m responsible for kicking his ass and keeping him on time for everything. I’m allowed to use physical force if necessary, he gave me that in writing. I’m definitely going to enjoy that part.”

“Sounds like Oli’s your slut, to be honest.”

If there had been any liquid anywhere near my mouth, I would have done a spit take. The implications of it, as well as the tone of his low voice muttering the word slut was enough to do me in. There wasn’t, though, so I simply gaped at Noah for a moment before erupting into laughter.

“You know, it really does. I’m going to remember that. Don’t tell him though. He likes to think he’s the dominant one in this situation.”

Noah pushed himself away from the wall, giving me another smile that sent shivers down my spine, before turning to walk away. “I can’t wait to see you put him in his place. I’m going to be watching.”

•••

The room was nicer than any I had ever been put in while working on a tour and, even more importantly, I wasn’t sharing it with anyone. I didn’t know what kind of strings Oli had pulled to make this happen, but I would thank him thoroughly for it. In any way he deemed acceptable.

I shook the thought from my head.

It didn’t work.

So, I did the only thing that made sense. I called my best friend.

“Lia, I’m in fucking trouble,” was the first thing I said to her. We’d never been too fond of greetings.

“Did you get arrested before tour even started again?” Her voice came through the phone, somewhere between accusatory and amused.

“That never happened! It was a case of mistaken identity and they let me go immediately. Anyway. No. My problem is that I want to fuck my boss.”

“And that’s news to you how?” she scoffed.

“Lia!”

“What! How is it any secret, or ever has been, that you want to bone Oli Sykes?”

I fell down onto my bed in defeat. It was extremely comfortable, which did ease my pain momentarily. I would get an amazing night’s sleep here.

“I thought I was over it,” I whined. “I thought I was going to be fine but he’s fit as fuck and I’m gonna have to spend every fucking day with him. Never mind Noah.”

“Noah? Okay, now you have my attention.”

“I didn’t have it before? Rude.”

“Less complaining, more talking about Noah please.”

“He’s fucking dreamy, I’ll tell you that. And a flirt. I think? I’ve yet to determine it for sure. And I’ve only seen him and Oli interact once but Oli looks at him like the sun shines from his arse so he’ll probably be around all the time, too.”

Lia didn’t say anything for a long, long moment. Long enough that I pulled the phone from my ear briefly just to check that the connection hadn’t dropped. When she finally spoke again, she sounded much more serious than I’d heard her in a while.

“Aubrey. I know I make fun of you a lot.” True. “And I know that I don’t always give the best advice.” Also true, sometimes painfully so. “But I love you and you need to listen to me for once, yeah? Have some fucking fun.”

I had to admit, that wasn’t the advice I thought I was going to hear.

“You have this weird thing about not allowing yourself to let loose and enjoy yourself but I’m giving you explicit permission. Do whatever feels right. Flirt with anyone who’s attractive to you and wants to flirt back. Make a move on Oli. Make a move on Noah. I don’t fucking care. But stop depriving yourself of happiness because you, for some unexplainable reason, think you don’t deserve it. Please, Aubrey. Have some fun on this tour. Okay?”

I was dumbstruck. For a while, I didn’t know what to say, but Lia stayed silent, waiting it out. Waiting until her words seeped into my brain. Started to make sense. And I knew. I knew she was right. I’d been focused on chasing after job opportunities, constantly trying to prove myself, travelling from one place to another, and never had I stopped and taken a moment to allow myself to really be happy. I hadn’t had a relationship since… I didn’t want to think about it. Hell, I hadn’t even touched anyone in forever. I couldn’t remember the last time I’d gotten drunk, stayed out until sunlight, sang my heart out, let go.

And this tour… Oli had given me the job because he wanted to hang out with me. I didn’t have anything to prove. So I took a breath. And I told Lia a single word.

“Okay.”

•••

I was almost asleep, clad in a pair of shorts and an old shirt and covered under the blanket, when my phone chimed with the tell-tale jingle I’d assigned to Oli. He was my boss, after all. I felt like I should at least make an effort to make sure I’d notice his attempts to contact me, even if it only came in the form of a personalised ringtone.

Oli u up? Aubrey Is this a booty call Oli come over

I knew I didn't have a good enough reason to refuse. Double checking that I had noted down his room number, I grabbed my key card and phone and quickly padded down the hallway, thanking the lords that no one bumped into me. Oli opened the door the second I put my knuckles against it to knock. He didn't waste any time pulling me into the room and onto his bed by my hand.

“Wow, forward much? Normally I at least get dinner before jumping into bed with someone,” I joked.

“Love, I’ve taken you out for food so many times, you should get on your knees without me having to ask.”

I landed a good slap to the back of his head for his comment. It seemed better than to acknowledge the fact that I would, definitely, without question, get on my knees for him, and now my head was once again flooded with inappropriate images. Settling on the mattress next to him, I tried not to get too close to Oli, which shouldn’t have been a difficult feat on a double bed, but as soon as he had grabbed his laptop again, he shuffled so close that his thigh was touching mine.

“Can I show you some stuff?” he asked, blissfully unaware of the turmoil in my heart, as he was rapidly opening and closing tabs on his laptop. I simply nodded, waiting for him to continue. “I know you’re going to see most of it tomorrow, I made sure the sound tech people are cool with you staying at the sound desk if you want so you can get a good look at the whole show, but look, we did a whole video montage that’s going to play before the encore, and…”

Oli talked and talked and talked, about the show, about the planning of it all, about their rehearsals, showing me pictures and videos and blueprints and all I could do was sit and listen and fall in love with the sound of his voice a little bit more. He was catching me up on everything I could have possibly missed, letting me listen to everything he was expecting to happen in the next two weeks, and how he couldn’t believe I was actually there and part of it all.

“Having you and Noah here is the fucking best,” he grinned, somehow snuggling even closer into me. I let him, against my better judgement, as always.

“Someone’s a bit in love with him,” I teased.

“Everyone is a bit in love with him. You’ve met him. Prettiest dude on tour.”

“Apart from you.” It slipped out before I realised the thought was even in my brain, but Oli seemed delighted.

“You think I’m pretty?” He fluttered his eyelashes in a way that would have been purely obnoxious, usually, but all I could focus on was how fucking pretty he did indeed look. “You think I’m cute? You wanna kiss me? You wanna hold my hand?”

“Oh my god, I take it back,” I groaned, pushing him away and attempting to crawl out of his bed, but his arms grabbed onto my middle and pulled me back before I got anywhere at all. He seemed to anticipate me trying to fight his grip, because as soon as I made any further move, his fingers found the skin under my shirt and began tickling my stomach in relentless cruelty. Within seconds, I was reduced to a shouting, giggling mess, tears threatening to spill from my eyes as I wriggled underneath him, to no avail.

“Please, please, Oli!” I gasped, breathlessly. “You’re- fuck, you’re the prettiest!”

His torment stopped immediately, but our position didn’t change. I was still trapped under his broad frame, his hands still on me, his hair almost tickling my face, he was that close. My breathing was going fast, trying to calm down after his attack, but his proximity didn’t help at all. For a moment, a long moment, we simply stared at each other, all fight leaving our bodies. Then, just as I wondered if anything was actually going to happen, he sat back up, busying himself with his laptop and fixing the blanket.

I almost missed it when he muttered, “For the record, I think you’re the prettiest, too.”

[a-heart-attack-ow]

The Arrangement. Part Eight

Part Six

Part Seven

Part Eight: Smut/unedited

The cameras flashed like lightning snaking across a dark sky. Blinding and magical all at the same time. I held the soup ladle with my left hand as I’d been instructed to, my massive black diamond ring on display to my audience. I smile widely, making sure to remember that the smile needs to reach my eyes to be believable. Before me was a line of homeless individuals waiting for me to serve them. I’d done work with the soup kitchens before, but this was the first time that I had photographers watching my every move. I try to focus on the people I’m serving, the camera flashing as daunting for them as it is for me. I recognize some of the faces of the people in line and I greet them accordingly, an action that makes the cameras flash in another quick frenzy. I serve the food and try to remain focused on the people I want to bring awareness to. I mentally remind myself that this is why I’m doing this. 

Well, one of the reasons why I’m doing this. Aside from keeping my in-laws happy and aiding their goal of making Colby Brock’s image better to the public. Aside from the fact that if I don’t do this my father could pay the price for my insubordination. 

Worse than he already had. 

I try to shake the thought from my head, my focus returning to my work. I try to remember all of the points that Sam had walked me through this morning. The angles I needed to stand at and the facial expressions I needed to maintain appearances. 

Appearances that couldn’t indicate the agony bubbling beneath the surface of my skin.

The true nature of the family I married into. The true nature of what my husband got up to on behalf of his family. My smile grows as I serve the last person in line, my eyes locking with the cameras. 

As if on command, I feel Colby’s hand on the small of my back as he joins me at my side, the sensation uncomfortable and alien after the past seven months since that night. Months that had made us strangers once more. Except when there was a camera pointed in our direction, then we had a show to put on. He kisses the side of my head, my eyes fluttering closed. My heart skips a beat when he does this, the spark still evident between the two of us. 

God I loved him. Despite everything I loved him. Despite the distance that had grown between us.

He feels it too. The spark. I can tell by the way that his fingertips lightly rub where his hand is resting on the small of my back. A small reassuring gesture. I open my eyes and look over at him, our gazes meeting. 

Suddenly, it feels like it’s just the two of us. The way that it should be.

I want to tell him I love him, but I don’t. Instead, I simply smile up at him and he smiles back. The rest of the event passes by in a blur and before I know it, he’s holding my hand and guiding me to the car. Making sure the cameras see that we’re holding hands. It’s not until we are in the car and he pulls away that we drop the act. His hands grip the wheel tightly as he drives, his eyes on the road ahead. 

I can feel he wants to say something, but he doesn’t. He’s quiet. 

The way that he had been for the past seven months. Since that night.

Sure, we still fucked, but he seemed more reserved around me. More determined to only truly interact when he had to. He slept next to me every night and brought me along with him to his meetings with his associates, but I couldn’t place why he was so distant. I kept repeating that night in my head and I couldn’t figure out what I’d done wrong. He was just hot and cold and hard to read. 

Without realizing it, I’d been watching him for too long and he noticed. His jaw clenches and his eyes remain focused on the road ahead.

“There isn’t anyone watching us, you don’t have to pretend you care.” 

His words hurt and I can’t stop my eyes from watering. I couldn’t understand why he was so mad at me. I hadn’t done anything to warrant this response. I’d done what I was told the entire time we’d been together. This entire arranged marriage, I’d been good and now he was punishing me for something I wasn’t aware of.

I just couldn’t figure out what that something was. 

I hadn’t been unfaithful or strayed. All that had happened was my father got hurt by his parents and ever since then he was distant. The tears sting my eyes as I look down at my dress covered stomach. Down at the secret I’d been keeping from everyone for the last three weeks. 

I’m pregnant.

The removal of the I.U.D. had been a success and now I was carrying the heir to the Brock Family Estate. 

Just like I’d been told to.

The tears slip out silently as the weight of my situation hits me. I know that I needed to tell Colby, but I didn’t want to. Not when he’d been acting like this. I wasn’t even sure he’d be happy about the baby. 

Would he be upset that things were going to change? Would things get worse when they did? 

I tuck my hair behind my ear and remain silent as I break down in the passenger seat. I don’t know if he’s noticed, but I decide that I don’t care if he has. All I do is try to control my breathing as he pulls up to the gate outside of our house, buzzing security to let us inside. He parks the car in our driveway loop and I don’t wait for him to turn off the car before unbuckling and getting out of the vehicle. 

My feet move along the gravel of the driveway and up the thirteen marble stairs that lead up to our front door. I hear him turn off the car and get out. The sound of the car door slamming behind him the moment I reach the front door. I leave the door wide open for him, but I don’t make it too far into the house before I’m met by Sam’s sympathetic blue eyes. He sat on the steps of the grand staircase, waiting for an update on today’s events.  A look of confusion flashes over his face as he studies the tears escaping me. He glances behind me at Colby when the front door closes. 

“What the fuck did you do to her?”

He growls at Colby, standing up from the steps. The blonde brushes past me, his hands going for Colby’s black button up as he pulls his friend in close. I turn to face the two of them, my tear soaked face now evident to Colby. From the look on his face, he didn’t know I was crying, but now that he does an undetectable look flickers over his face. 

“Sam, please. He didn’t do anything to me. He just said something rude in the car. I’m sorry for getting upset.”

The words fall from my lips in a sad desperate tone. A tone that causes Sam to look over at me. His grip is still firm on Colby, who doesn’t move out of Sam’s grasp. 

“Don’t say sorry Emilia. This entire time that you’ve been here it’s always you apologizing for his behavior towards you. It’s fucked up and I’m tired of it…”

He pauses looking from me to his friend and adopted brother.

“... You’ve been treating her like shit since our parents hurt her father. As if it’s her fault or something, but if it's anyone’s fault it's yours. You’re supposed to protect her and you should’ve been the one to talk to mom and dad before anything happened to her dad in the first place. Instead, you ran away and did a delivery that any one of the guys could’ve done. You just didn’t want to step up.” 

Sam’s words hit hard to my husband and I can tell. It's in the way that he looks at Sam, the bitter look of disgust that overtakes his handsome face. My tears worsen at the words, my hand moving to my nonexistent baby bump. I can’t help but the feeling of heartbreak that I’m experiencing will kill me. Surely, I would shatter underneath all of this weight. 

“I’m pregnant.”

The words fall from my mouth in a gasp. Like a breath that had been held for too long. The desire to keep it a secret seemed to vanish under the tension I hadn’t been expected to feel today. The moment I speak, it’s like the air has been sucked out of the room. 

Two sets of eyes stare back at me in shock. Two mouths agape at the newest development. A sob escapes me as I look at Sam, my heart breaking at the look of kindness that he directs to me. Over the past seven months, Kris, Celina, and Sam had been my only friends at the house while my husband had chosen to ignore me. 

Until he wanted a fuck.

Even the other guys that worked with Colby had come by to visit. I’d become friends with Corey, Johnnie, Jake, and Nate. What would they all think when they found out? Would they look at me like Sam is right now? I hate to imagine how disabling that would be to experience. How their looks of sympathy might be the straw that breaks me completely. 

“When were you going to tell me?” Colby’s voice rasps in a mixture of frustration and disbelief. The tone of his voice is enough to make me want to snap and instantly I’m defensive. 

“I don’t know Colbs, considering you only truly talk to me now when there’s a camera stuck in our faces I wasn’t sure.”

His eyes narrow at my words. 

“What about last night when I was balls deep in you? Or this morning? You didn’t think to tell me then?”

There’s a smirk that finds the corner of his lips. The same smirk he wore whenever he talked about fucking me. A smirk that normally got me hot and bothered, but now made me want to slap him. This time I look at him with a clenched jaw, anger radiating through me. 

“Fuck you…”

The words come out in a broken sob. It had been years since I’d let myself get so angry that I cried.

“... All I’ve done is love you. Despite everything and every gut feeling that told me not to. All I’ve ever wanted was for you to be the bright spot in this fucked up situation and for months you were. I thought maybe everything would be okay, but you took that from me the same night your parents chose to threaten me…”

Sam lets go of Colby and moves to my side, holding me against him as I break down, my knees wobbling. 

“... And the worst part is I’m still in love with you. Even though it’s clear you aren’t anymore. I don’t know what happened that night, but I’ve missed you so much. I’ve been mourning you and you didn’t even notice. I’ve been so alone even when you’re next to me and it's been agony.”

I stop speaking because I can’t say another word. I just crumble against Sam and his arms wrap around me as I sob against his chest.

 I hear him mutter something to Colby about ‘getting the fuck out of here’. 

But I can’t bring myself to care. 

I’m so tired of caring.

—

I fell asleep on the couch after spending hours crying into Sam’s lap, his fingers playing with my hair to soothe me. I don’t know how long I’d been out before I felt someone lift me from the couch, their arms strong as they held me tightly against them. The smell of his cologne is all that gives me the hint that it's Colby’s arms I’m in. Despite our arguing earlier, he gives my head a soft tender kiss. His grip on me tighter when he starts to take me up the stairs. It’s this softness that had made me fall in love with him in the first place, a softness that I’d been missing recently. 

“I got you darling.”

He whispers once he reaches the top of the stairs. I’m still out of it enough to be sleeping, but awake enough to know that he’s bringing me to our bedroom. Once we are inside, he lays me down on the bed and makes sure to pull the comforter up over me. I feel him brush the hair out of my face as he sighs. 

“I don’t know if you can hear me, but I have to say this now or I won’t say it at all. The dinner with my parents was harder than I let on. Yeah I cried like a little bitch and you saw that, but it's the way my parents view me that really got under my skin. I have a history of messing up or not being enough of what my parents wanted me to be. I never worked hard enough, I never kept secrets well enough, and then I messed up with you. The thing that happened with your father should’ve been avoided, I should’ve done the talking that night we had dinner with my parents. They saw that you’d become someone I cared for, that I didn’t have you under control and in line with what they wanted you to be with me. So they hurt you to punish me. I am so sorry about that...” 

He pauses to take another deep breath.

“... That’s why I’ve been so distant. If they knew that I was keeping you in line and not letting my feelings for you cloud my judgment they wouldn’t hurt you again. But in doing that, I’ve hurt you and I honestly didn’t mean to do that. I am still in love with you Emilia. I’m so proud of you and your ability to keep your head up in all of this. I promise to be better about communicating and I promise to be a better husband. I promise to be the best dad I can be. I want a future with you, not just an image in front of a camera. I hope that you’ll let me do that. I hope you can find it in yourself to forgive me.”

He finishes speaking without realizing I’ve opened my eyes. He’d been looking forward the entire time that he didn’t notice until he felt my gaze. A small smile finds his lips when our eyes meet.

A smile I don’t return. Instead I look at him blankly, my body still tired from the hysterics brought on by today. I’ve never cried as hard as I cried today. My heart hadn’t ever shattered as badly as it had today. A simple sorry wasn’t going to do it and I needed to stick to that. Even though the sight of him in only his black sweats causes my mind to wander for a second, desire laced deep within me despite it all. 

“This cycle needs to stop. The hot and cold bullshit has to stop. We are having a baby and I’m not going to allow this type of atmosphere for them. You’re either all in now or I’m not doing this anymore. I’ll have our child, but I’ll stay in my own room and keep up appearances for the sake of my father’s life. But if you don’t want us then I’m done.”

He listens to what I have to say, truly listens to every word and contemplates. Not even when I sit up in our bed and look at him does he speak. He really mulls it over and I do appreciate that. We’d both spoken more words to each other in the last few minutes than we had in months. 

I missed hearing him speak.

I shake the thought out of my head as he reaches for me, his hands pulling me onto his lap. I try not to meet his gaze as he does this, but it’s no use. He places a hand under my chin and focuses his attention on me. 

“I want us.” 

He speaks so softly that I almost can’t hear him. Like he’s afraid that he’s going to upset me again if he speaks any louder. I place my hands on his bare chest and breathe out a deep sigh as I trace the tattoo above his heart. He’d explained what it was to me once, a symbol that meant ‘protect your heart’ , something I thought was cute, but now I look at it and I wish that I’d done the same. My heart had been through the ringer for the last year.

Year.

The thought enters my head as I recall the date. One year ago today we’d been married. An anniversary that snuck up on us both with cruel irony.

“We’ve been married an entire year Mr. Brock.”

I state lifelessly as I swallow hard. He nods as if he already knew it, something that makes today worse. He had to choose today of all days to be an ass. 

“Has it all been bad, my darling wife?”

He asks. Eyes trained on me. 

“No, some of it has been good. But my husbands a real dick sometimes.”

I respond quickly, unable to stop myself from smiling when he feigns offense. He places his hands on either side of my waist and I can feel what direction we’re heading in. He bites down on his bottom lip and focuses on how my breathing hitches. Slight annoyance with my own body’s inability to chill the fuck out overtakes me briefly, before he places his lips to mine in caution. 

I don’t bother trying to fight how good he feels as he kisses me. Nor do I bother with the fact that he’s lifting up my dress, his hands finding my thighs. Instead, I lean into it, my hands on top of his as I help him unwrap me. He groans at the action, satisfied that I want him as badly as he wants me. But wanting Colby has never been an issue for me, which is how I’d ended up in this mess in the first place. I can feel him getting hard beneath me, harder as I grind myself against him. An action that practically causes him to growl in sexual frustration. He moves me off of his lap and into our bed, his body straddling mine. He keeps his attention on me as he slides my underwear down my legs and lifts my dress up. 

“I’m sorry I made you cry.”

He rasps, placing light kisses on the inside of my thighs. I lay there with my eyes fluttering closed as the sensation of him kissing further and further up my thigh fills me with anticipation. Anticipation that feels worth it the moment I feel his mouth against my aching core, his tongue dipping inside of my slick sex. The feeling of his mouth was always incredible, but today it felt even better. Today I could feel the extra care he was spending on me as if his tongue was trying to atone for his actions earlier. My back arches into the bed beneath me as his tongue works on me, soft whimpers escaping me with each flick of his mouth. He works on me for several minutes of indescribable pleasure, my head spinning the entire time. I hear him chuckle darkly to himself as he can feel me getting closer to the edge. 

“Come on baby, cum all over daddy’s tongue.”

He speaks in a lower register as he whispers the words against my needy sex. The invitation is all that I need to release, his tongue lapping up my orgasm with feverish need. A moan escapes my lips as I come down from my high. My hands grip the comforter I’m laying on top of as my chest heaves up and down. 

“Fuck, Colbs.”

I whimper as his mouth moves from me, his body suddenly straddling mine. In the darkness his pale blue eyes find me, his face serious as he studies me closely. I can tell he wants to say something, but that he’s unsure of what exactly to say. He knew words wouldn’t change my frustration. He needed his actions to reflect a change, but he wasn’t sure where to start. 

I didn’t know either.

But at this moment I make the executive decision to deal with all of that later. Instead I move my left hand to the back of his head, guiding his lips to mine. His breathing gets heavy, when I deepen the kiss and my fingers lace in his hair. Moments like this made me thankful for the electricity burning between the both of us. It was undeniable and magnetic. 

It had always been. Regardless of whatever else was happening at the time. 

A groan escapes him as my hips lift slightly, enough to cause friction between the two of us. I may have just came, but I was more than ready to feel him inside of me. 

It didn’t matter how many times we’d done this. Everytime felt like the first. 

The air around us is heated, our bodies needy for each other. I slowly move my hands from his hair, my fingertips ghosting along his toned body and down his chest. I reach his sweatpants, the pads of my fingers lightly toying with the fabric. I drag them down an action that causes him to chuckle. 

“You seem to know exactly what you want Mrs. Brock.”

He lets me drag the sweats down and to expose himself to me. A sight that I knew I wouldn’t ever get tired of seeing. For a moment he stares down at me in wonder, at the mess he’s made of me. The heap of uneven breaths and a look of desire in my eyes. I smile up at him, a smile he returns. 

“I’ll always want you, Colbs.”

My voice sounds more sentimental than I intended it to, but I meant every word. He knows I mean it as he looks down at me, his face sweet as he presses his lips back to mine. This kiss is slower, more cautious as if he’s trying to savor the moment. As we kiss, he aligns himself with me, the tip of his cock sliding in slowly. Another groan from him sounds against my lips as he allows himself to savor how tight I am around him. He breaks the kiss as he slowly starts to thrust inside of me, our eyes meeting once more. He’s so gentle as he fucks me, a slow satisfaction that I didn’t want to stop. 

We remain entwined in each other, his head leaning down to rest in the crook of my neck. Light kisses a trail along my collarbone as he continues moving in and out of me, my body moving with his in perfect rhythm. He marks me carefully, aware of where he’s leaving the marks. The gentle sucking of his lips sent shivers up my spine. He thrusts deeper and deeper inside of me and with each movement I feel the nerves of my stomach building up. I can feel him getting closer to the edge as he thrusts. 

“I’m going to cum Emilia, but I want you to cum with me too.”

He rasps against my skin, breath heated. I moan in response, unable to form a coherent word. As he thrusts once more, I feel myself spill over the edge at the same time he does. Filling me with his cum. 

We lay in heated silence as we try to catch our breaths, our bodies slowly coming down from their high. We remain entangled together as I feel his cock twitch inside of me one more time before he pulls out of me to lay at my side in our bed. His blue eyes remain on me as he studies me closely. 

“I really am sorry.”

Softly he speaks, his hand reaching out to tuck some of my hair behind my ear. I can hear how sorry he is, but again I need to see a change before I’ll fully believe him. 

“How do you feel about me being pregnant?”

I ask instead of responding to his ‘sorry’. I knew that we had to get pregnant because that’s what his parents wanted, but now that it was happening I didn’t know how he actually felt about it. We’d only briefly spoken about it prior to this moment. He sees the insecurity in my eyes and the uncertainty of this new chapter of our lives. 

“I’m excited. There’s no one else I would want to have children with, but…”

He hesitates, his brows furrowing as he chooses his words carefully. 

“...I’ve got to figure something out about my parents. I don’t want my parents to get their grubby hands on our child. They’re not going to do what they did to me to them. I have to figure out a way of standing up for us and what we need without them retaliating in some way.”

His fingertips run through my hair, his face full of thought. I’d be lying if I said that I hadn’t worried about the same thing. If I hadn’t worried that somehow they’d retaliate if we did one thing they didn’t approve of with our child. 

How else would they hurt my father?

The thought dances in my head, spinning out of control for a second before Colby’s hand moves to my face, his thumb lightly tracing over my cheekbone. The worry must’ve been evident on my face. 

“I’ll take care of my parents. In the meantime, you are literally growing a human inside of you so I want you to just focus on that. I’ll do the heavy stuff with my family.”

He draws me in against him, my head resting against his chest as he kisses my forehead. After what had happened with my father I wasn’t sure if I could fully relax. 

I trusted that Colby wanted to do the right thing, but could we out smart his family when they always seemed to be two steps ahead?

I wasn’t sure if we would be able to.

But God, did I hope I was wrong. 

[bellewintersroe]

Max Verstappen X HornerDaughter!

Part 9 here’s the LINK to part 8. eeeeee I love drama, who’s ready for more?! Warnings: mentions of cursing, jealousy, cursing, arguments, Leni has a hard time admitting her feelings.

Max finds Carlos and Leni closer than ever, getting along like a house on fire. After a gruelling race in the Qatar heat and his win of the 2023 Grand Prix, he’s obviously hurt and confused when Leni barely congratulates him. When a few drinks are involved and there’s no escaping Max directly, he confronts her much to her dismay.

Taglist: @ironmaiden1313 @callsignwidow @fangirl125reader @norassimpingzone @roseseraj @eugene-emt-roe @copper-boom @its-elias-world @cassiopeiia24@larastark3107 @maxxiemoo @crashingwavesofeuphoria @18754389

“God it’s hot.” I fanned myself, complaining yet again to Carlos who sat besides me on the small couch, directly under the fans cold breeze.

“You are telling me.” The Spaniard shuffled in the chair. My gaze roamed up to the TV again, watching the race which was currently occurring just outside of this room. Carlos’s car faced technical difficulties which meant he couldn’t race today, not in this weather. I could see the effect it was having already on some of the drivers and I immediately began worrying about Max. The worry that consumed me was mixed with the sensation of my stomach that twisted and knotted every. Single. Time. I thought about Max. The past few weeks I’d avoided him completely, I didn’t attend Japan and now I was in Qatar I’d stayed out of his way completely.

We watched the whole race, occasionally jumping up and running outside. The sweat would cover my skin every time I went outside, so I figured it would be best just to stay inside. Already, Logan had retired from the race, there were incidents occurring left, right and centre. When the race did draw to a finish, I was on the edge of my seat, returning back to the Red Bull paddock perfectly in time for when Max crossed the finish line and became the Champion of the 2023 Grand Prix. My heart was in my throat, I cheered and celebrated for the driver like nothing had happened, I truly was happy for him, it was his third championship. I ensured I’d linger away from where Max was hugging everybody, I could be happy for him from a distance. It might’ve been the wrong move, but I just couldn’t bring myself to speak to him, not after we’d not talked since that night on the yacht. It wasn’t until I was heading out of the paddock did I come face to face with him. Nobody else, just Max. My heart tightened and I audibly gasped. He stared back to me, eyebrows slightly raised. He looked just as shocked as I did.

“Max!” I blinked, his lips pulled into a half smile, “ah- well done today, you deserved that win more than anybody.” I nodded surely. Max scanned over my face as though he was waiting for something else. “Thank you, Leni.” He sighed after a moment, sipping his water again. I forced a smile, before heading back past him, on my way. I heard him sigh once more as my face heated to a deep shade of red. I was mentally cursing to and at myself because of the longing I felt myself growing for him once again. That was seriously the most awkward thing I’d ever experienced. I was a horrible, stupid girl.

That even I tried not to go out. I’d decided it wouldn’t have been right if I was there, celebrating for Max when we hadn’t even spoke. Of course nobody knew of this but me and him, but somehow that made it all too worse. I’d talked to a few of my friends who thought I was literally crazy for just blanking him. Looking back in hindsight, they were right. Soon enough, I had both my dad and then Carlos begging me to come out. Carlos stated he was in a partying mood, which ‘wasn’t often these days’ so I’d have to come out. It turns out he had already been drinking in the hotel with Lando, which made perfect sense when they physically refused to move off my bed, feeding me alcohol until I got ready.

It’s fair to say I was absolutely steaming before I even got to the club. My inhibitions were lowered at a worrying rate, and I didn’t give two shits stumbling past paparazzi alongside two drivers, not from my fathers team. Besides, they didn’t give two shits about me anyway.

“Leni Horner, where is Max?!” One of them questioned. I snickered to myself, where was Max? Inside I presumed. Of course I wouldn’t know because I hadn’t spoken to him properly in weeks…

I’d like to have said the night was amazing, but I couldn’t remember the majority of it. That’s not me being dramatic or forgetful either, I was black out drunk, throwing up all the contents of alcohol before heading back to drink more. It wasn’t a good look on me. With some chewing gum and perfume, and a lovely girl who helped me in the girls bathrooms, I managed to freshen up, stumbling back out to where Carlos pulled me to get some air. He was flailing around, stumbling over his own two feet. I was laughing so hard that I collapsed onto my knees. The security didn’t like that so much and ushered us into a quieter part behind the outside area. In hindsight, considering the country we were in, we should’ve been a lot more careful. Thank god the security had kept an eye out on us because we were being dumb. Being so blindsided in amusement from Carlos, I completely failed to notice who else was sat in the outdoor area, watching our behaviour unfold.

“We have to act sober. Okay, one, two, three. Be sober.” I prepped up the Spaniard, hooking my arm around his. As if it was magic (or because it was Carlos Sainz) we were allowed back into the outdoor area. I pushed him onto a bench and sat besides him, giggling like a school girl whom had just been told off.

“Carlos- Carlos you’re too fucking funny!” I slurred out.

“Estoy tan jodidamente borracha, Leni. Oh no, esto no es bueno.” Whatever he was spewing in his native tongue, I felt my smile drop noticing who’d made their way over. Carlos fell backwards, into the wooden wall behind, sinking down. I didn’t have it in me to laugh, not when Max was the one who’d hurried over.

“Jesus Christ, man. What happened to you?” He began tugging on his friends arm. The nerves got the better of me, I began giggling uncontrollably. “Leni, help me sit him up.” Max spoke as I became borderline hysterical, trying to yank the man up off the floor. I don’t think I was much help, not when I slipped on the wooden floor myself and fumbled down with a harsh cry of laughter.

“Jesus.” Max muttered, not seeming too amused, especially when Carlos’s hand curled around my own, I shot him a glance to which he was staring directly at the contact. As soon as Carlos sat up, Max retrieved him a glass of water.

“You ok?” I asked the Spanish man. “Yeah.” He responded in the most monotone voice ever. “Leni, why did you stop racing?”

“Me? I just turned into a teenager.” Surprised by his question, I was honest in my response. “I should’ve kept doing it.”

“Yeah.” Carlos nodded as Max slid down across from us both, handing over two glasses of water, one for me, one for Carlos. Carlos gulped his down, whereas I sipped at mine awkwardly, thanking him without a glance in his direction.

“Max- did you know Leni used to race?” Carlos slurred out, water splashing from his glass, onto my bare leg. “Sorry.” He then proceeded to use his sleeve, wiping at my bare leg. “Carlos it’s fine.” I laughed, overly aware of how all this was looking, especially in front of Max.

“No, mate. I didn’t know that.” Max bluntly responded to which my gaze landed quickly on him. “I-I thought you knew.” I stammered, making direct eye contact with him. God, he looked angry, pissed off, I hated it- the worst thing was I made him feel this way.

“I must have forgot.” He then shrugged, reaching out and drinking from his glass of alcohol. My heart sunk and I completely turned away, tears pricking at my eyes pathetically. I had no reason to cry, absolutely none, but seeing him there hurt how badly I wanted him. I just couldn’t have him. How could he truly want me? Like it made no sense to me.

“I’m gonna go.” I stated, standing up on a whim. “I’ll come.” Carlos grumbled. “Oh, you’re going with him now are you?” Max scoffed in my direction, luckily, Carlos didn’t hear or catch on, but I could only stare back to Max with a horrified expression.

My mouth opened to respond something, but an overly excited Oscar came bounding over, giving us all big squeezes. “Hey guys!!” He greeted. Carlos seemed like the only person willing to match his temperament, I felt terrible, but when he took the Spaniard by the arm inside to dance some more, I decided that was the cue for my exit.

“Leni.” I heard Max sigh as I scurried away towards where drivers were already waiting for us. “You can’t go back alone.” Max huffed, pacing after me. I gripped my bag harshly, striding around the pathway around the back of the club to reach the exit.

“I wanna go, I don’t care.” I firmly spoke. “Look, I think we really need to have a talk.” He winced. My brows knotted as I stuck my tongue to the inner corner of my tongue. “I’m not- I can’t-” I began stumbling over my response. Max let out a sad scoff of laughter.

“Typical, running away from me again.”

My cheeks heated at his words, feeling an awkward sense of sickness bubble inside of me. I hated confrontation, especially with men, specifically those I liked. “Max I-”

“No, I get it. You regret what happened.” He outright spoke, I could barely look up at him, bothered by how truly wrong those words were. I never once regretted it in the sense of what happened, it was just weird for me.

“What?” I dumbly spoke, looking down to his shoes. “You know, you could’ve just told me. Rather than acting like I do not exist.” The Dutchman spoke, my teeth burrowed harsher into my bottom lip. “Why didn’t you just tell me, Leni?” He borderline pleaded, stepping a little closer. This time, I turned up to him again. He looked so hurt, so confused, I couldn’t believe I’d made him feel this way. I was selfish, so so selfish.

“Because…” I inhaled harshly. “Because?”

“You- you don’t get it Max.”

“No, I do. You don’t like me the same why I do to you!” He exclaimed, my heart tightened in a painful manner and I felt myself beginning to tear up.

“How can you? It’s so soon.” I gulped harshly, my gaze becoming blurry as I stared behind him, to whatever was happening in the distance.

“So soon for what?”

“You broke up with Kelly, what, a month ago?”

“Why does that matter?” His voice cracked, he seemed on the verge of more anger and when he pushed it once more, tears began falling from my eyes. “Leni that doesn’t dictate who-who I can like and when?!”

“Yes it does! I don’t want somebody who’s fresh out of a break up, thinking that they like me when they’re still hung up on their ex!”

“You knew how I felt about everything to do with that last relationship!” He harshly spoke. I shook my head, wiping my eyes.

“Like Jesus Christ, how much more clear could I have been?”

“You were clear enough when you told me all this whilst you were still together.” I blurted out, my emotions getting the better of me. Max stood back, sighing and pinching the bridge of his nose.

“What the fuck can I do, Leni?”

“For what?” “To make you feel normal about me again, to-to stop all these stupid games.”

“I do feel normal about you.” My bottom lip blubbered.

“You don’t have to lie. You were willing to go back with Carlos.” Oh, wow.

“Why the fuck would I leave with Carlos?!” Judging by his expression he knew he’d fucked up. “I’m sorry for ignoring you, I really am I know it was childish, Max, but it doesn’t mean that I want anybody else!” I admitted, feeling like a weight had been lifted off my chest, literally.

“Wha- so then why not speak to me?” He stammered.

“Can we just go now?” I attempted to turn around but he hooked a hand around my arm gently. “Please tell me.” He gently spoke. My tearful gaze met his, stomach knotting at the eye contact. I had two choices, be honest with him, or lie yet again.

“I just- I’m scared Max, of how soon it all is after your break up. Everything just happened so quickly.”

“You don’t have to be scared. I like you, Leni. Like, a lot more than you know.” My acrylic nail was now between my teeth, his confession was so beautiful, I just had this bothersome fear inside of me. “It’s too soon, Max.” I whispered, my guard slowly building itself back up.

“It’s not.”

“It is for me.” I felt his hand slip off my arm gently. The two of us didn’t speak for a few seconds, Max sighed, leaning forwards and beginning to use his thumb to wipe my tears away. “That’s ok.” Max lightly spoke. “I’m sorry, Max.” I whispered.

“It’s ok.” He hushed again, the proximity between us was so close, it was comfortable, but I was still slightly shell shocked from the whole confrontation between us.

“I don’t regret what happened on the yacht.” I then added on, calming down from my tearful state. Max’s larger hand remained on my cheek, just gazing down to me, creating the most intimate thing I’d ever experienced.

“Like… I want you so badly, Max.” I admitted, watching him gulp at my words. He looked so beautiful, he was so gentle with me, and his expression of his feelings towards me made me feel insane. “I want you.” He whispered back, my hand smoothing onto his chest.

“I just- we can’t- it’s so soon.” My head then dropped once more. Max shuffled forwards, arms wrapping around me as he embraced me in a gentle hug. “I will wait for you, Leni.” He spoke the most romantic words I’d ever heard. “If you want time then we can just go on as normal.” He hushed. I nodded, sinking deeper into his hold, hands flattening over his back. I was positive this would create the most gruelling tension between us both, but truth be told I was too wasted to even consider that.

“Just please, no more ignoring me…”

[honestlyvan]

CONTROL ANNOTATED: DIDN’T WE JUST DO THIS?

(Also available on Dreamwidth!)

Hi! It’s me and @drdarling again! We wrote the Alan Wake 2 annotation for Ahti’s dialogue! I’m aware there’s been guides like this out for like three years but also I wanted to do it myself in the style of the previous guide, mostly out of curiosity to see how the style of his dialogue has changed because it’s… definitely different :’D

Once again thanks to Saikku and RH for the help with the translations, and once again Finnish is very regional and my translations are just one Finnish reading on what the fuck he is saying. The point here is to demonstrate that Ahti isn’t cryptic, he’s quite comprehensible but he’s also definitely just saying shit to mess with people.

Spoilers for all of Control past this point.

Ahti intro, points Jesse to the elevator:

There you are! You are here about the job. Janitor’s assistant. You need to go to the interview. Go that way to the elevator. Very good. I’m Ahti, the janitor, by the way. You’ll work for me. You can say I sent you. If they don’t hire you, niin johan on helvetti. There be work for the axe, take them behind the sauna, jumalauta.

“niin johan on helvetti” – cursing. “it (sure is/will be) hell” translates broadly to “there will be hell to pay”

“There be work for the axe” – “olla kirveelle töitä”, open-ended threat; something needs rectifying, with force if necessary

“take them behind the sauna” – “viedä saunan taakse”, “put someone out of their misery”, to execute someone. Saunas are usually built away from the house, so anything happening behind them would not be visible to the main house and yard.

Jesse: Ahti the janitor is a friendly face in my book.

Better than somebody with no face at all. Think about it, no face.

Jesse makes her way down to Ahti’s office in Maintenance:

Well done. You got the job. It’s place for congratulations. Jippii, saatana. (note from Autumn: Very deadpan delivery on this one that makes me lose it every time.) It happened in the last drop. I truly need an assistant.

“Jippii, saatana.” – “Yippee, (saatana)”, loanword from English.

“in the last drop” – “viime tipassa”, common idiom, “in the nick of time”

Jesse asks for help getting to the override to get the lockdown lifted:

Yes, yes. Easy peasy. It’s just around the corner. But first we need to get you working! Very small couple of hours job.

“just around the corner” – interesting case of Ahti using the correct English idiom rather than saying “behind the corner” as we’d say in Finnish.

“Very small couple of hours job.” – not an idiom, but a very common part of ESL English from a Finnish speaker, dropping verbs and particles.

Jesse inner monologues, “Something tells me it’s gonna be more than that.”:

Jahaa, jaa-a, you think there’s a dog buried in this? I can tell you are not a yesterday’s grouse’s son. That’s why you’ll make a great assistant. Very well, I’ll hit the facts on the table. Mä kyllä sanon perkele suoraan että this house has a vermin problem, a bad one. They’ve already messed up the cooling pumps and the power generators of power plant, perkele. And the pensioner inside is starting to feel the band around his head tighten. The situation needs to be fixed before the plant blows up and we all disappear like a fart in Sahara, perkele. But don’t you worry, I’ve left you clear instructions. You’ll catch the end of the thread before I go to my vacation. The works on the task board here you can do later when you have time.

“there’s a dog buried in this” – “koira haudattuna”, common idiom meaning that the situation is not what it seems, or there is a hidden (negative) side to the story being told.

“a yesterday’s grouse’s son” – “eilisen teeren poika”, common idiom, “born yesterday”

“Mä kyllä sanon perkele suoraan että” – “Perkele, I’ll say it (straight, directly), that”

“feel the band around his head tighten” – “vanne pään ympärillä kiristyy”, growing more agitated as the situation gets more serious. Sometimes you also hear “feel the band around the barrel tighten”, about situations that get more stressful before they resolve.

“like a fart in Sahara” – “kuin pieru Saharaan”, common turn of phrase, “into thin air”

“catch the end of the thread” – “langan päästä kiinni”, common saying, understanding the situation, “getting up to speed”

Jesse inner monologues, “Vacation? Right.”:

Yes. No-one's gonna cancel my holiday, or sheaths gonna rattle. But don’t worry at all. You’ll take care of it, and soon this crisis gonna be last winter’s snow. You better go now so you don’t have to run with your head as your third leg. The door in the back leads to the plant.

“sheaths gonna rattle” – “tulee tupenrapinat”, common idiom meaning that there’s going to be an argument or a fight. “The knives will be drawn”.

“last winter’s snow” – “menneen talven lumia”, water under the bridge.

“run with your head as your third leg” – “juosta pää kolmantena jalkana”, common idiom, to be in a rush.

Incidental dialogue hanging around in Ahti’s office throughout:

It’s time for a coffee break soon. Aah, kaffea.

“kaffe” – “coffee”, a Swedicism

Pensioner, yes. Northmoor, mister director. Starting to climb on the walls in his bachelor pad.

“to climb on the walls” – “kiipeillä seinille”, idiom, to act nervous and jumpy, “going spare”

Tango is a window into a Finn’s soul. It came from Suomi Finland. Anyone who says anything else is a lying goat. Perkele.

“a lying goat.” – “valepukki”, idiomatic. What it says on the tin.

(Translator’s note: Ahti is 100% lying when he says this. Autumn confirmed that this is a reference to the Finnish director Aki Kaurismäki talking about Finns inventing tango and sailors taking it to Argentina with them, but unlike Ahti we know he was joking.)

The Bureau is trying to dig a hole in their own cellar, looking for gold. Greedy will have a shitty end.

“dig a hole in their own cellar, looking for gold” – “kaivaa kultaa omasta kellarista”. As far as we can tell, this is not a saying anywhere in Finland, but as always this means it might just be an obscure one.

“Greedy will have a shitty end.” – “Ahneella on paskainen loppu”, a common saying. Exactly what it says on the tin.

Where did I leave my mop again? Pirulauta. Burnout, cosmonaut. I really need a holiday.

“Pirulauta” – “Devil, help me”, more commonly in the form “jumalauta” (god help me). The “devil” referenced in this is not a capital-letter Devil, but rather a folk devil/evil spirit.

“Burnout, cosmonaut” – Not directly a saying in Finnish. “Kosmonautti” gets used the same way “space case” does in English, he is berating himself for his attention slipping.                                             

The Containment Sector has blown to pussy’s splinters. The work won’t end even if you keep doing it.

“pussy’s splinters” – “vitun päreiksi.” “Vittu” is more properly translated as “cunt”, it’s the most common swear in modern Finnish. (Note from Saikku: In Ostrobothnia folks also say "pillun päreiksi", with "pillu" translating literally to "pussy".)

When the time comes, I’m gonna go on my vacation, like dad went into mom.

“like dad went into mom” – “kuin isä äitiin.” Exactly what it says on the tin. (Also not a saying, Ahti is just making a dirty joke.)

You know what’s the worst thing about this vermin? Saatana! The noise! They don’t appreciate good music. And that’s the reason they can go as far as pepper grows.

“go as far as pepper grows.” – “mennä niin kauas kuin pippuri kasvaa”, a common idiom. In essence, “fuck all the way off.”

The first thing I’m gonna do when I get to my vacation is to get drunk. Anyone who doesn’t respect that can go to hell’s spruce tree. Sausages on eyes. A drop won’t kill you and you can’t drown in a bucket.

“hell’s spruce tree” – “helvetin kuuseen”. This is a mistranslation from Ahti, since the more appropriate translation would be “to the backforests of hell”. Also, in essence, “fuck all the way off”.

“Sausages on eyes.” – “nakit silmillä”, common idiom, “extremely drunk”

“A drop won’t kill you and you can’t drown in a bucket.” – “Ei tippa tapa ja ämpäriin ei huku”, a reference to a pop song by Irwin Goodman of the same name about drinking lots of booze.

The Research Sector is the worst. The doctors don’t know how to clean after themselves. That Arish fellow is not a useless guy. Respects his elders. Makes good coffee. Yep yep. The janitor is the one who makes everything running and under control.

What A Mess: Burn The Trash dialogue:

Yep. Burn the trash. Throw it in the fire. Burn it all. Burn it into a reindeer, not into a moose.

“Burn it into a reindeer, not into a moose.” – (Translator’s note: *drags hands over face*) The word for ashes/cinders, “poro”, is a homonym with the word for reindeer, also “poro”. It’s a play on words.

Ahti dialogue on The Clog:

My old enemy, the Clog, is blocking the pipes. You need to deal with that shit. He’s my very old enemy, the clog, Paska.

“Paska” = shit

He’s very clever, he’s trying to sneak in. We got him caught with his hand in the fish trap. Get rid of him.

“caught with his hand in the fish trap” – “jäädä rysän päältä kiinni”, a common idiom. “Get caught with your pants down”.

It’s back. What would kill a bad thing? Paska mikä paska.

“What would kill a bad thing?” – “Mikä pahan tappaisi”, a common turn of phrase. What it says on the tin.

“Paska mikä paska” – “The shit is what it is.”

Ahti dialogue while fixing the power plant:

Broke. Gone to shit. Fix it fast. If the plant goes boom, we can throw the spoon in the corner.

“Gone to shit.” – “mennyt paskaksi”, translates directly.

“throw the spoon in the corner” – “heittää lusikka nurkkaan”, idiomatic, “buy the farm.” (This is a slightly odd translation to me, as it is being used more in the same sense as “throw in the towel”, creating the implication that dying in huge explosions is voluntary.)

It’s fried up. You need to fix it before the old twig-pants inside the plant has a shit-fit.

“the old twig-pants” – “vanha vihtahousu”, idiomatic. Broadly “that old devil”, in Finnish it’s common to have many names for evil or just strong spirits, because calling them by their proper name invites them to come bother you. (“Vihtahousu” gets translated in AW2 as “Ol’ Scratch”)

“shit-fit” – “paskahalvaus”, interesting case of a missed opportunity for a funny Finnicism in the form of “shit-stroke/shit-arrest”

Ahti dialogue while clearing darkness:

Darkness everywhere. New day, same old bloody shit, said the old lady. Like tar, but good for nothing. Get rid of it!

“New day, same old bloody shit, said the old lady.” – “Uusi päivä, samaa vanhaa paskaa, sanoi vanha täti.” This is not an idiom, but the “x, said y” format is a common one for proverbs, and a common way for people to quote wisdom from their family.

Ah, tar. Sauna, tar and booze, they’ll get you through anything! Like the winters in Finland. Long dark winters. As dark as in a sack, perkele.

“Sauna, tar and booze, they’ll get you through anything!” – this is a paraphrase of a saying that goes “if sauna, tar and booze doesn’t cure it, the disease is lethal”.

“As dark as in a sack” – “pimeää kuin säkissä”, common turn of phrase, what it says on the tin.

Ahti dialogue while cleaning up Mold:

The air in here is getting bad. The vents, they are full of mold-shit. It’s no good for you! Headache, nausea, mold-lung... Depression, but how can you tell when you’re a Finn? Helvetin home, eikö siitä nyt saatana pääse eroon.

“Helvetin home, eikö siitä nyt saatana pääse eroon.” – “(Helvetin) mold, is there really no way to get rid of it, (saatana)!” The sentence is in passive voice (“Can it not be gotten rid of”) which gets used in Finnish a lot to refer to ongoing problems.

You need to scrub that clean or there goes my reputation and honor. And then the good won’t swing.

“reputation and honor” – “maine ja kunnia”, common turn of phrase. The “honour” here does not mean personal honour, but rather community reputation.

“the good won’t swing” – “ei hyvät heilu”, common turn of phrase, usually used to threaten someone akin to “you’ll be sorry.”

More of it! This thing is completely leaving from the mitten. Perkele, saatana, helvetin helvetti. Loma tulossa ja tällästä paskaa.

“leaving from the mitten” – “lähteä lapasesta”, common idiom, “get out of hand”.

“Loma tulossa ja tällästä paskaa.” – “The holidays are coming and (we have to deal with) this kind of shit.”

Ahti dialogue while taking care of the plants:

They are very good listeners, you can tell them anything. Or you can sing to them. They like that.

For the plants in Investigations:

The plants in here have died standing up. Piruparat. Lighten them up!

“died standing up” – “kuolleet pystyyn”, common turn of phrase that gets used about neglected plants a lot.

“piruparat” – “poor devils”, again with the small first letter, referencing folk devils and evil spirits.

Ahti tells Jesse to take a break:

Hurry is not good for you. And the contract says you can take a break. Ten points and a parrot patch. Now you know what this job is all about. Could be worse. There are good benefits.

“Ten points and a parrot patch” – “kymmenen pistettä ja papukaijamerkki”, common turn of phrase, “ten points and a gold star”. Comes from an old children’s show called “Sirkus Papukaija” (“Circus Parrot”)

When you’re done with all the tasks:

Tattis! A crazy person works hard, and a wise person gets away with less. Happy vacation to me!

“Tattis” – “thank you”, a Swedicism

“A crazy person works hard, and a wise person gets away with less.” – “hullu huhkii, viisas pääsee vähemmällä”, a proverb about working smarter, not harder.

Here, have a little knick-knack as a thanks from me. Not too owly at all!

“Not too owly at all!” – “ei pöllömpi”, idiomatic, here meaning “impressive” or “well done”.

Ahti goes on vacation:

Now this boy left, said the son of Annikki Tähti. My assistant will keep work in the glove and the house standing. Lomille lomps, holiday homps.

“Now this boy left, said the son of Annikki Tähti.” – (Translator’s notes: *long pained groan*) This is a strange half-pun, half reference. The phrase usually shows up in Finnish as “nyt meikä lähti, sanoi Annikki Tähti” (“I’m leaving now, said Annikki Tähti”, a famous Finnish iskelmä singer who is not relevant to the phrase other than to create alliteration). Ahti is doubling up on the alliteration and saying complete nonsense as a result.

“keep work in the glove and the house standing” – “homma hanskassa ja tupa pystyssä”, common idiom, what it says on the tin.

“Lomille lomps, holiday homps.” – “Lomille lomps/lompsis” is a persistent popculture reference that lives on among Finnish conscripts and the rest of the culture. Ahti’s translation is quite accurate, although “lomps/lompsis” can be used as an onomatopoeia for stepping into a puddle/swamp, while “homps” means nothing. Alliterative jokes like this are common in Finnish.

Dialogue during Finnish Tango when you first enter the Ashtray Maze:

Broke. There is no way through. Badly made. Wolf shit. Somebody cut costs in the wrong place. Contact the janitor if you need to get through.

“Wolf shit” – “susipaska”. The word for wolf, “susi” is idiomatically used to mean broken, flawed or unusable, and is here a modifier for “paska” rather meaning the droppings of the animal.

Jesse contacts Ahti in The Foundation:

Aah. Aijai. Vikingit saatana. Ei kestänyt ruottalaisen veljekset kunnon löylyjä.

“Aijai” – Filler phrase. Literally means “ouch/ouchie”, but can be used to signal appreciation.

“Vikingit saatana. Ei kestänyt ruottalaisen veljekset kunnon löylyjä.” – “(Saatana), them vikings. The Swedish brothers couldn’t stand a proper löyly.” “Löyly” is both the steam from throwing water on the stove in a sauna, and the humid warmth that follows from “throwing löyly”. Ahti is making fun of the Andersons for not tolerating a hot sauna. It’s a very common shot across the border for Finns to say Swedes don’t tolerate “real” löyly. (Translator’s note: Ahti is using “ruottalaisen” rather than “ruotsalaiset”, as is typical of the Ostrobothnian dialect)

Hey, girl. For a Finn, holiday is holy, perkele.

“holiday is holy” – The word for any nationally mandated day off (+ Sundays) is “pyhäpäivä”, literally “holy day”. Extended national holidays, such as the three days around Christmas, and even long weekends can be called “pyhät”, the holies.

Did you miss me? Did you have piss in your sock? Yes. Now now now now. Bark don’t make a wound. You did good. Take my cassette player. You can borrow it. The song is a present from my friends to you. It will get you through the maze so you can do your job.

“piss in your sock” – “kusi sukassa”, common idiom, meaning “frozen with fear”

“Bark don’t make a wound.” – “ei haukku haavaa tee”, common proverb, “sticks and stones can break my bones but words can never hurt me”

Ahti in Jesse’s Hiss nightmare:

Are you sure you are not lost? Maybe you can find yourself in the Director’s Office. You should keep trying. You are getting closer. Welcome back. I knew I chose a good assistant.

Closing notes: Despite Ahti having significantly less dialogue in Control than he does in AW2, this document ended up nearly as long as the other one. All the way through working on this I’ve been commenting on how his English is both weirdly better and worse in AW2, like, his use of English overall is a lot less stumbling and his vocabulary seems larger, but at the same time he uses less English, relies on just directly saying in Finnish what he’s thinking, using a lot more filler Finnish… It’s an interesting choice overall.

I’m not sure it’s relevant to the character, but having seen it I’m now gonna be very interested to hear what he sounds like if he shows up in Control 2 or other relevant RCU projects :3c Hope you had fun, and maybe learned something new.

[heliads]

I recently re-read the hunger games trilogy, so can you write a katniss fic with a fem!reader being secretly haymitch's daughter?? nothing much, just the two of them spending time together, hunting or spending some quality time together, ignoring the capitol, the world and individual problems to enjoy the hours they have together

please let me write for thg i love this request

masterlist

It is a terrible thing to be a Victor. Most people only look surface level, choosing to focus on the gilded trappings and gaudy praise the Capitol heaps upon you. Beneath the facade, living with the memories of what you’ve done is far harder than finding a way to burn through all the money they give you for killing twenty-three other children while all the world watches on. The price of blood was always worse than the price of gold, anyway.

You’ve seen this once before already. The Capitol does its best to stay up to date on every little detail of their lovely Victors’ lives, but when Haymitch Abernathy had his first child, he did everything in his power to ensure that no one would ever find out. That infant would live in someone else’s home, kept out of sight of the cameras and the Arena alike, and she would grow up to be you.

It wasn’t the worst of lives. It kind of was. No one can pick their place in life when they first come into the world, obviously. Otherwise, we’d all be living up in the Capitol and no one would be down here, choking on coal dust, waiting for their bones to turn ash so their body can be burned to heat the homes of the rich and prosperous a million miles away from them.

Haymitch watched out for you as best he could. He sent your foster parents money when he remembered it, always a little out of schedule, a touch too much to cover up for the fact that he forgot the last time around. He started remembering as you got older, though. He stopped feeling ashamed of you and started feeling ashamed of himself.

You see him a lot, although the frequency of your meetings always picks up around the time of the Games. He needs it as a reminder that not everything about him always leads to death and ruin. Once in a blue moon, Haymitch Abernathy is responsible for something good. Something, someone, like you.

There’s a schedule to the Games, one that isn’t known or enforced by the Peacekeepers, and it goes like this:  first there is the before, and then there is the after. Prior to the start of the Hunger Games ceremonies, Haymitch will be over at your place. You’ll talk a lot. Both of you will do your best to keep the conversations light. Remember when you were a kid, crawling around all the time? How you used to laugh like crazy whenever it snowed?

Then he’ll get dragged off by the Capitol to go mentor two kids until they die, and then you reach the second phase of the schedule, the after. Haymitch will hole up in his estate in the Victor’s Village, the only occupied house there, the only living being around because he couldn’t save a single person other than himself, and you will find him because no one else will. It’s quiet most of the time. He doesn’t want to think about anything at all, and certainly not the additional two kids who placed their faith in him just for him to let them down again.

After a while, he’ll manage to claw his way out of it, and then you’ll have the better part of a year before the cycle repeats. You’ve had plenty of time to grow used to this pattern, and you’ve perfected it like a pastime. The right words to say get easier to remember when you say them every year. And now, as a reward for getting it right, you get to repeat the process with Katniss Everdeen.

You say that like it’s a bad thing. It’s not. Truth be told, it’s easier spending time with Katniss than anyone else, even right after her first Games when everything is bloody and terrible. You could see yourself doing this again next year, and the next one, and the next. You don’t think you would mind it. Not at all.

Perhaps that’s why Haymitch set this up in the first place. Maybe he knew it would be okay. Or maybe he was just so ridiculously pleased that he managed to save not one tribute but two that he was only thinking about prolonging Katniss’ survival. The reasons don’t always matter. What happened, happened, and secretly you’re glad of it now.

Katniss had been locked in a death spiral of nightmares and bad memories. It soon became clear that she would lose herself to it if someone didn’t intervene, so someone did. Haymitch took Katniss by the shoulders, shook her a little and told her to get it together, and pointed her to you. You knew what it was like to befriend someone who wanted to shut out the world, who couldn’t sleep without nightmares and couldn’t talk without thinking that someone was watching. You could understand Katniss better than anyone, and Haymitch knew it. Daughters are such wonderful pawns to play, aren’t they?

Again, a cruel way to put it, but this is the truth nonetheless. It’s what Katniss suspected the first time you visited her house, and the second, but after a couple of weeks passed and it grew obvious that you weren’t giving up on her without a fight, she begrudgingly let you in. The two of you had been observing each other for years now, the consequence of there only being so many girls your age in a small town in District Twelve, but things accelerated rapidly after the Games.

You’ll never be entirely certain why. Katniss doesn’t let people in, and she threw up her walls tenfold after she partook in the Hunger Games, unable to discern if someone was talking to her because they wanted to or if they wanted to kill her. She even started growing distant from Gale, because Gale didn’t understand her completely, not anymore. Not like you did.

Over the course of the summer, Katniss’ icy demeanor started to melt. She is hesitant and cautious, but she still smiles at your offhand jokes, always a little surprised, like she can’t believe she’s having this good of a time either. The two of you start meeting up in the forest surrounding District Twelve where no one can see you, where it’s just the two of you and the blissful sunlight waving through endless flurries of leaves above your heads.

And, not according to plan, you realize that you’re starting to fall for her. Katniss is like no one you’ve ever met before, even your dad. You knew how to operate around Haymitch, but Katniss doesn’t require an assembly guide or how-to explanation. You just know her. It is as easy as that.

After realizing such a thing as that, how could you not begin to love her? You can steal your dad’s drinks and get properly sloshed on them, but it’ll never match the tipsiness you feel when you look at her; when she laughs at one of your jokes, always reluctant at first but more easily as she gets more used to you. It makes you want to try again and again, and so you do. Katniss listens every time. She says she likes to hear you.

Instead of running away, you decide to embrace the feeling. You head to the woods more and more often, although never at the risk of the Peacekeepers’ attention. Katniss never tells you when she’s going out, nor do you mention when you’re out here, but the two of you have a habit of finding each other nonetheless. You turn around and there she is, emerging from a stand of trees; she crosses a bank at the same time as you; you climb a tree to get a better vantage point of the forest and you’re instantly drawn to the sight of her doing the same across a clearing. Katniss makes sense.

If you squint your eyes just right, you can make your entire world double. The hazy afterimages of present day will swim before you, a hair out of line but still there, still two instead of one. For example, right now, walking through the woods beyond District Twelve, it’s as if you can see two exact images of the current moment instead of only one.

On one version of this day a few years ago, when you hide away from the world in the forbidden greenery past your district’s limits, you come across Katniss Everdeen and you hide from her, too. You do not know her. Not well, at least. You see her and pretend otherwise. She does the same. She heard your footsteps first and thought herself visited by a deer instead of a girl. Her finger tensed on her bowstring, but she released it the second your face finally came into view. Katniss could not kill a person.

Would not. Katniss can kill a person, as it turns out, she can outlive twenty-two tributes through various purposes and keep one other alive, then do it again, but she does not know that yet. All Katniss knows in this past moment, this one half of a fractured memory, is that she will not kill you, and that is true today, too.

On the other version, the one that happens today, you do not run from Katniss, you go to her. That is the whole purpose of risking the Peacekeepers’ wrath by ducking under the fence to escape to the forest. The wilderness means Katniss, and Katniss means you’ll be able to spend another day relatively free from the concerns of a girl from District Twelve who has increasingly little between herself and the violence of not having enough.

Katniss doesn’t turn when you approach, but you can hear the quiet smile in her voice when she admonishes you, “You’re going to scare away all my game.”

You chuckle. “No, no. I’m drawing them out of the bush so you can shoot them. It’s teamwork.”

“If it were teamwork,” she argues, “you would also have a bow.”

You lift a shoulder. “I would never dare steal your favorite weapon. I want you to feel important.”

This does make her laugh. Almost indignantly, yes, but still a laugh. Still a win for you. She manages to nab a few birds before setting her bow down for the morning. The two of you sit side by side in the tall grass, a cool breeze blowing upon your faces, bringing with it the tender tangy scent of the forest.

Usually, neither of you have ever suffered from awkwardness when you’re out here. You could spend hours out here, not saying a word, and it would be just as fulfilling as if you’d spoken the entire time. Today, though, there’s something stuck on the tip of your tongue, a truth that refuses to go unsaid no matter how you fight it.

At last, you give in and, keeping your eyes resolutely ahead, you tell her what’s on your mind. “I’m glad you’re with me, Katniss.”

You can see Katniss frowning out of the corner of your eyes. “Where else would I be?”

You roll your eyes. “You know what I mean. You could have heard me coming and avoided me the second I stepped into the forest. Probably would have caught more, too.”

Katniss shakes her head doubtfully. “No, we’re good. This is good.”

She sets her jaw determinedly, like this settles everything. It does, in a way. It gives you the courage to continue. “I’m glad to hear it. I like spending time with you.” A pause. “I like you.”

Katniss’ brow knits. “Why would you like me?” Genuinely confused, she adds on, “I’ve done terrible things, Y/N.”

“We’re all terrible,” you whisper back softly.

She rolls her eyes. “I’ve been in the Games. You haven’t.”

This is true. No matter how much time you spend with Haymitch or Katniss, nor how many stories you hear about the Hunger Games, it will never be the same as actually taking part in them yourself. With all luck, you never will. Both Haymitch and Katniss would fight to keep you out of them, and then to keep you alive, should that happen, but the possibility shrinks with every year as you get older.

“I still want you,” you tell her. More the empty forest air; you can’t quite say this to her face, not yet. The fear of rejection after everything is too great a burden to bear.

When you do risk a glance over at her, though, Katniss doesn’t look affronted. Instead, she looks more at peace than you’ve ever seen her. Slowly, carefully, her face upturned to catch the morning sun, Katniss smiles again. You’re not even sure that she’s aware of doing it. It is simply the only way she can process that this, you wanting her, would make her happier than anything else.

And, sitting here in the forest, surrounded by a million memories of all that you have done together, a thousand hopes of all that you have yet to do, you look over at Katniss and you know. You know that she loves you. You know that she can’t say it, not yet, not until she’s certain that you love her as much as she loves you.

She will tell you, though. In time. Perhaps it’ll happen another day out here past the confines of District Twelve, in a space that has always been safe to the two of you and will thus protect her from the fallout of confessing to a friend. Perhaps she’ll tell you while you’re asleep next to her, to avoid a response, or perhaps she’ll tell you while you’re pretending to be asleep, so she knows you’re heard and you don’t have to tell her anything.

Or, maybe she’ll just say it now, unspoken but still startlingly loud, audible in every glance your way, every faint smile she never bothers to hide. That, you think, would be enough.

hunger games tag list: @w1shes43, @ilovexavierthrope

all tags list: @wordsarelife

[cheapsugar]

ONE SHOT 02. vil x idia title: thunderstorm contains: hurt comfort, fluff-ish, aged up (this is pg, don't worry) summary: idia shows up at vil's door for the first time in seven years. note: the thing about me is that i love a little "i know i haven't seen you in years but i miss you" moment! please enjoy! i actually had this like 1/4th written for a year but didn't know how i wanted it to end. and then, suddenly, it came to me! she/he vil and he/they idia as usual, i am betaless so sorry if i totally missed any oopsies in the editing process!

Vil Schoenheit was never much of a dater. And tonight continued to prove that fact.

It had been fine, all things considering. It was normal enough. Dinner with a coworker who she had been enjoying spending time with. They had gone to a restaurant that the coworker had heard of. It was nice, albeit attempting too hard to be fancy. 

Regardless, she had honored it by wearing a neat white jumpsuit with golden accessories. He had done his hair to the side, falling over his shoulders—the length of it now hitting past them.

Sometimes he still wasn't used to it. She had started growing it out sometime after her fourth year at NRC. A...much needed change after events he didn't care to remember. Even if it had happened in, what feels like, long ago now. Vil was now 26... and yet the pain of back then still felt fresh sometimes...

'Don't think about that now.' He thinks to herself.

What had he been reflecting on again...? Ah, right.

The date had gone fine. And, she would even go as far as to say she had fun. But, that's pretty much all she had. There wasn't a spark, there wasn't that romantic pull. She hadn't even invited him inside when he had dropped her off. By the time they had returned to their car to leave, Vil had already slipped off her heels and placed them at the side of the front door to properly put them away later.

He decided right then and there that he wasn't going to ask for a second date. That, once again, it felt like things were destined for more platonic intentions. And, now-a-days, Vil isn't quite sure if it was the people he was dating or because of...well...himself.

And as she sits on the couch in her living room, a soft lamp illuminating the space around her as the soft sound of rain on the window pattered away—Vil recounted the date to Rook via text message. Who, as always, sensationalized Vil being wrapped in 'cupid's quest'. A statement that wasn't false but wasn't particularly true either. The truth of the matter is that Vil hadn’t really been looking for a relationship for…a while now. Every date has been initiated by someone else. 

‘I’m married to my career.’ A common statement uttered out of his mouth quite often. In conversations, in interviews… She’s basically made herself the poster child for all who were overworked. A fact she’d like to think didn’t actually apply to her but, the last several years of packed scheduling between photoshoots, auditions and acting gigs proved otherwise. Working had truly been all he knew. Much to the dismay of, not only his friends, but of her father as well. 

Every other phone call consisted of his father telling him on and on about how he should give himself a break. How there’s a life to live and that she needs to go out there and live it. To which she’d remind him that a lot of her roles lead her all over Twisted Wonderland. So, there was a lot of ‘life’ she was seeing.

Rook Hunt: He is right, though, mon cher.

Vil Schoenheit: I do not need a lecture from you as well, Rook.

Rook Hunt: Lecture you? I would never dream of it. 

Vil couldn’t help the breath of a laugh, he can read the sarcasm seeping from the hunter’s words from miles away. He may not do it traditionally, but Rook was not above letting Vil know when he thinks she ought to do things differently.

Rook Hunt: Will you not see this man again, then?

Vil Schoenheit: No. Not for a second date, at least. We’d obviously still have to see each other for work.

Vil Schoenheit: He was nice. But…

Rook Hunt: He did not stir your heart?

Vil Schoenheit: Not at all.

Rook Hunt: Beauté! Your heart continues to be difficult to win over. How long has it been now since your last relationship?

Vil Schoenheit: We do not need to count the days! 

Or the years…

Vil Schoenheit: In fact, don’t you have other things you should be attending to? A certain lazy prince?

Rook Hunt: Roi des Lions? I am simply passing the time… he seems to be finding a hiding place for me~

Rook Hunt: Any moment now our game will begin.

Vil Schoenheit: Ah. You two are…truly something else.

Vil Schoenheit: I’ll leave you to it then. Go have your fun. Goodnight.

Vil places his phone down, letting out a sigh before lifting herself off the couch. Tomorrow was a day off but she still had her routine. If she wanted to be rested enough for her 5 AM jog, then she’d need to start her nightly skin care now—

The soft knock on the door would’ve gone entirely unnoticed if it weren’t so silent. And Vil would’ve thought it was a trick of the mind, until a louder knock follows.

Who was that at this hour? And during this rain too?

She’s frozen for a moment. Vil had been in a horror movie once and, as ridiculous of a thought it was, he knew how those things started. Exactly like this, during a vulnerable night in one of her best jumpsuits. Vil should ignore it right? Where was her Magipen…?

Vil moves carefully, stepping closer to the door. There wasn’t another knock but she thinks she hears…mumbling?

“This was stupid…Probably not here…Creepy…” Creepy?! Who in the Seven was out there?! Vil shouldn’t check. But…he ought to get a look, right? For the authorities, of course! In case he had to report a potential stalker!

She carefully walks over to her door, moving the cover of the peephole and taking a look to see.

Bright flaming blue hair. 

“Don’t give up yet, Niichan!” A voice says through some sort of communication device. “Knock again!”

“I-I can’t, Ortho! I should just go home…” 

“No!” 

Vil’s heart pounds in his chest. On the other side of this door was a person Vil has not seen in seven years. Not since the day they decided to break his heart. The day he declared that his business with S.T.YX. and Vil’s own responsibilities were just…too much for their relationship to handle. 

Vil’s last relationship. And her last love.

‘I can’t tie you to this life, Vil! I hold you back—’

“Ortho, I’m leaving!” Idia says. 

Vil’s body moves before she realizes it. Unlocking the door and basically throwing it open. The breath he hadn’t realized he was holding, comes out all at once as Idia yelps. 

Blue flames are lively around them as Vil looks on with wide eyes. The silence between both of them gives away the unfortunate truth that neither of them knew what to say. Though, in this silence, Vil is able to see the changes seven years has done to him.

Idia’s hair is shorter. It’s held back in a ponytail and it just barely reaches the middle of their back. The bangs are relatively unchanged, but Vil can see an undercut. The hairdo exposes the piercings on Idia’s ears. A style Vil could only describe as punk. 

A sort of style she had seen in very small bursts in Idia’s closet during their school days, hidden away from the world. What had pushed him over the edge to finally do it? 

On his face sat sleek glasses, the sort of frame that were thin and nearly made the illusion of no glasses at all. The dark metal of the glasses’ temples and bridge being the sole giveaways. On their right nostril sat a single round silver nose stud. 

Despite those changes, the clothing style was very distinctively Idia. Though things felt more…polished. The hoodie was not swallowing them, the pants weren’t baggy at all and…was that a belt?! Time has changed Idia Shroud.

Appearances, at least. The way they looked entirely terrified as they gripped onto their umbrella, as if hoping that the world would swallow him whole, was entirely classic Idia. 

“Niichan?” Ortho’s voice comes from the watch on Idia’s wrist. “Are you still there?”

“I-I’ll call you back…” They answer before cutting the connection. 

The silence, unfortunately, is deafening. But, this time, Vil can not handle it.

“What are you doing here?” She asks. Which somehow managed to make Idia jump. And it’s entirely unfair the way it managed to endear him a little—but it’s only so long until Vil’s shock will melt away. And that pain and anger will settle. 

Idia’s still got a few more seconds. 

“I…” He starts, eyes looking around as if they’re searching for the answer. Oh, those seconds are ticking…! “...I wanted t-to…to see you.”

Vil blinks. And it becomes very clear to the other that that wasn’t the answer she wanted.

“I…” He gulps. “I…missed…” Another swallow. “I missed you…!” They push out their answer. And…there goes those seconds.

Vil’s face twists in confusion, mouth slightly agape. Idia was here because they…missed her? Missed her? The hand on the door grips tighter in bewildered annoyance.

“You showed up to my house at 11 PM out of the blue after seven years because you missed me?” Ah, the annoyance in his tone was rising by the second. “What?! How—How did you figure out where I lived?! How in the Seven—!” 

“—Ortho found it!” Idia rushes to answer. And then, as Vil looks prepared to give them more of a mouthful, they continue to speak. “I—I didn’t t—tell him to do that! He did it on his own! I swear!”

That very well answers the how, but it does very little to answer the why. And Vil is about to tell them that but he’s stopped by a flashing light. Oh no… that meant it was going to—

Crash! 

Vil jumps at the noise. He didn’t see that a thunderstorm was coming and the juvenile anxiety regarding that was starting to rise to his throat. For as fearless as she was… there was one thing that did manage to get him on edge.

“Vil, let’s go inside.” Idia speaks, chin tipping as he motioned to the inside of Vil’s home. “You don’t like thunder.”

Ah. Idia remembered. 

No! He can’t be softened by that! 

…But he didn’t want to be out here to see or hear anymore of this storm. So, despite himself, he opens the door wider and makes room for the other to enter too. He’s met with a brief hesitation from Idia before ultimately shuffling in.

She notes now that Idia is a little fuller than he once was. And Vil wonders if he had been taking care of himself. It was a constant battle in their younger years, trying to get Idia to eat properly. He wonders what was the straw that broke the camel’s back regarding this. 

Moving around Idia, Vil motions toward the umbrella stand next to the door. “You can leave that there. There’s slippers in the shoe rack.”

Idia was different but, also, exactly the same in their own way. Their posture was still horrible, hunched and timid as they closed their umbrella to place next to Vil’s. He then moves to the slippers, kicking his shoes off carefully before slipping into the house shoes Vil typically has for guests. 

He still can’t believe that Idia is standing in his doorway. Vil still doesn’t speak as Idia’s eyes scan the immediate area around them, eyes landing on heels for a few seconds before looking up and over at Vil once more. In response, Vil crosses her arms at her chest.

“You…” Idia starts, swallowing before continuing. “...You look nice…”

Surprise lights up Vil’s face for a moment, not having expected that at all. To compliment so freely? …Well, perhaps it wasn’t all that different. But, it was fitting of the relationship they had prior to their separation. To say that now? It was quite ballsy of him. Still, Vil’s eyes run down Idia’s form.

“You’re eating better.” She settles with. “That’s good to see. Really.” 

Idia lifts a hand to scratch at the back of their neck, a bashfulness showing itself. “Y-yeah…” Their eyes fall to the ground and over to the side. “Guess I do eat better now. I, uh…I-I’ve been keeping track of that… Well, Ortho has been but—” His sentence abruptly stops. 

Vil can only blink as Idia stares down at…something. Slowly the hand on his neck slides off and falls to his side. Confusion falls on Vil’s face, following his line of vision to find that he was staring at… his heels? 

“What are you—”

“—Y-You were on a date?” Idia cuts through, pointing at the heels before pointing to Vil. 

“...What?” Vil’s arms tense for a moment. Painted lips open, sputtering a bit and she has to wonder: why was she feeling guilty? It’s idiotic! And entirely unexpected! His body will have to get with the program—there isn’t anything attaching them together anymore, there hadn’t been for a while. There’s no need to be saddled with unnecessary…feelings. 

“I was.” She says. “Hold it. How did you know?”

Idia’s shoulders are tense. The person before him was always so transparent with his emotions. Even if maybe, they didn’t want to be. Idia wears disappointment familiarly—Vil had always hated seeing it. She finds herself feeling the very same even now.

“...Your shoes.” They say, giving a bit of a shrug. “You uh, wear these types…when you go on a date.”

Vil looks down at her shoes—Idia was right. They’re comfy, but quite tall. In truth, they aren’t made for much walking but absolutely stunning for outings that have a lot of sitting. This is why they aren’t the sort of heels Vil wears everyday, but they aren’t event shoes either. They’d probably make it to an awards show, but Vil’s outfit tonight was definitely not award show ready.

Either way, he isn’t sure how to feel about Idia remembering this about him. So, he turns instead, walking further into his living room. 

What the hell was Idia doing here? What the hell was he doing remembering these things? And why the hell did he decide to turn up now? Vil’s head is swimming and his heart has just barely started to calm down. 

“Would you like… water…?” Vil speaks, trailing off when he turns and sees that Idia is still at the doorway. Hands wringing together, tips of their hair nearly black. 

She can see the indecision from here. And, well, she really can’t help the small feeling of… amusement? Enamorment? As Idia slouches, bangs covering his face. They looked just like they did when they were in NRC. That timid Housewarden; unsure, scared Idia Shroud. Despite her initial feeling, she didn’t actually like to see him upset.

Vil shifts his weight between his feet, hip poking out as he crosses his arms. It’s clear as day, Idia’s looking for a way out.

“It didn’t go well.” Idia’s head snaps up, their eyes wide. “It was rather disappointing, really. He wasn’t a bad guy or anything but, there was a lack of spark. Hardly worth pursuing anything other than friendship.”

Idia looks like a fish out of water, mouth opening and closing as they digest the information. Vil chooses to wait it out. She’s fighting back some sort of smirk. There’s no way to hide it, really. 

“S-So you’re single?!” The question rushes out of Idia like he nearly chokes on it. Vil isn’t sure what made her jump more—the volume the question is asked in or the fact that Idia rushed closer while saying it. They’re still not close, but they’re finally away from the door. 

“Yes, Idia. I’m single.” Now she lets the smirk free. “So you can stop sulking.”

At that, the blacktips finally left Idia’s hair. But, it was replaced by a faint pink—embarrassment. Back then, he would do anything to see that gorgeous pink color engulf his hair entirely. How problematic for Vil, that it appears that the sight of the pink still made his own chest feel tight. They always looked so good in pink.

Vil clears his throat as Idia’s clutching the end of their ponytail, trying to hide the pink they also realize has surfaced. 

“So, that water…?” Vil asks. 

“Oh uh…” Idia seems to be thinking their decision through. After a few seconds, they give a nod. “Yeah.”

“Very well. Take a seat wherever you’d like.” Vil says as he turns to the kitchen. 

In the privacy of the kitchen, Vil allows himself a moment to come to terms with what was currently happening. Placing his elbows on the island, he holds his head in his hands for a few seconds before his fingers slide into his own hair. 

Vil was playing it well for now, but her heart hadn’t stopped pounding since that first knock. With every look, every word—all she could think about was their past. Seven, Vil always looked at the future! There was no looking back! And yet, they were the one thing he could never move on from. 

It was embarrassing! To be caught up in a relationship from seven years ago?! It was juvenile! They were teenagers! Vil met new interesting people all the time. He’d meet actors, musicians, models, production crew, camera-people… but none of them could keep her interest. Maybe he didn’t want them to, deep down. But it was something to work on. It was something Vil was actively working on, in fact…! So it was truly unfair for Idia to suddenly show up on a rainy night!

After all, what was this? Some sort of romantic comedy? She had entertained the idea of trying to be in one, but Vil hadn’t bet on it becoming real life.

“Okay…” Vil whispers to the air around him, getting a glass before walking over to the fridge. He figured he’ll just hear Idia out on all of this… Vil wasn’t an idiot, she knew why he was here. But why now? Why tonight? Why—

Crash! A loud rumble fills the sky, a flash of light following closely behind. Vil jumps, managing to bite back a yell, but he couldn’t say the same about keeping a solid grip on the glass. It shatters on the floor and that manages to get a yelp out of Vil.

“Vil…?!” Idia calls out from the living room, concern in his tone. 

“I’m fine!” Vil calls back, ducking down to quickly try and pick up the bigger pieces of glass. He feels a sort of anxiety to clean this up before Idia could get in. He doesn’t know where it comes from. 

“Vil?” He hears Idia call out again. She’s ducked down behind the island, she doesn’t see him. “Where uh, where are you?”

“Wait, Idia. Don’t come over here. I dropped the cup—Fuck!” Vil drops all the pieces he had picked up, looking as blood started to bead on his pointer finger. “Shit.”

Idia rushes around the island, eyes wide as he slows himself down by gripping his hands on the surface of the counter and island. He examines the mess around Vil before his eyes land on her hand. 

“You’re bleeding!” He squeaks out.

“Yeah, I know!” Vil snaps, making Idia recoil back. An action she immediately regrets. “I’m sorry… I just… behind you there’s a first aid kit.” She says, pointing to a drawer behind Idia. 

Despite the earlier reaction, they still whip around to fetch it. Though, they ignore Vil’s outstretched hand as they reach for the bleeding one instead. 

“I can handle it—”

“I know you can.” Idia speaks, bringing the finger up and close to his eyes. He examines it carefully. “But, I…I want to help… and I’m checking to see if any glass is stuck in your wound.”

Well. She couldn’t stop him now, could she?

Idia examines it carefully for a few seconds more, before they turn to the first aid kit. Flipping it open, they pull out alcohol wipes and a bandage. 

Like this, Vil can really appreciate how much Idia has changed. There’s a maturity that wasn’t there before… perhaps it came with age. Or from working at S.T.Y.X. She decides she quite likes their new look. Really liked it, actually. The sleek glasses sit on them nicely and the undercut gives just that touch of edginess Idia liked. And the piercing? Vil hadn’t thought Idia would ever indulge in that change. And, just as he had predicted back then, it suit Idia. 

This wasn’t the same petrified teenager battling demons that still pained Vil to this day. And, dammit, she felt pride blossom in her. 

“Sorry, this might hurt.” Idia mumbles before passing the alcohol wipe over the cut. Vil sucks in a sharp breath at the sting. 

The silence between them stays as Idia continues to clean the wound. Inspecting it again, they seem to be satisfied when they don’t see any glass. 

“How deep is it?” Vil asks.

“It isn’t. What were you doing trying to pick up glass with your hands?!” He asks, now turning to unwrap the bandaid before lining it up with the wound. 

A small blush of embarrassment colors Vil’s cheeks. “I—There’s thunder outside. I can hardly make any sound decisions when I’m so riled up.” And then, softer, she says, “not to mention the unexpected guest.”

It was Idia’s turn to blush. This time, though, it didn’t reach their hair.

“...I-I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have…” Idia trails off, finishing sticking the bandaid on. “...Ah, ugh…” Idia lets go of Vil’s hand, getting up abruptly before turning away from Vil. “This was stupid, wasn’t it? A-At the very least, it’s rude! Who do I think I am? Some SSR normie protagonist in some visual novel?! I-I’m more of a level one NPC! Or, or the… the creep!”

Vil stands up now. “So, you do still ramble?”

“E-Eh?” Idia says. Ah, good, Vil’s successfully stopped their inevitable downward spiral.

“Idia…” Vil looks behind them, glass still all over the floor. He lets out a sigh before taking their wrist and hiding them on the opposite side of the island. She tries her best to ignore the way her hand tingles once she pulls away, it was so familiar. 

“Why did you come here?” Vil asked. 

“Because…!” Idia swallows, lifting his hands up to his chest. They start to rub the wrist Vil had been holding seconds ago. “...Because I-I miss you, Vil. I know it’s pathetic but, I miss you—”

“—You’re the one who broke up with me.” A momentary silence fills the air between them. Where Vil keeps his eyes on Idia, Idia turns his head away for a moment. Slowly, Vil can see the tips of their hair grow that dark color. 

“...I didn’t want to hold you back.” They say, frowning deeply. “My destiny was always chosen for me. I was always going to end up at S.T.Y.X. a-and I didn’t want to trap you like… like Mom was.”

She remembered this reasoning. Idia had said it then too. Vil can feel that old anger sizzling at her core. It was the same one he had felt back then, before the devastation. Seven! And Idia had been so…. so cowardly back then! Breaking up on the day they were going to go back to S.T.Y.X. All they had left was an hour! It was… entirely selfish!

“Right.” Vil spoke, eyes rolling before he crossed his arms. “You didn’t even try. I told you I was willing to work something out between us.”

“It was impossible back then!” Idia says, turning back to look at Vil. “That’s just fact!”

Vil scoffs. “Fact? No. You were just always too scared to stand up against the status quo. You never liked doing anything that was too hard! Not to mention, your complete inability to see past the negative. You didn’t even let us try.”

Vil can see the mixture of pain and offense on Idia’s face. Their eyebrows furrow, their mouth opening.

“Vil—”

“—You devastated me, Idia!” Vil nearly yelled, causing Idia to jump. Their mouth hangs, opening and closing like a fish out of water. This doesn’t deter Vil. This was the first time he would be able to give Idia a piece of his mind and he wasn’t going to waste it. 

“I wasn’t blind to your future, Idia! Nor was I idiotic enough to think it was going to be easy! But, I just thought that… that we would find a way to still be together. Because we… ugh, because we loved each other. We were in love and it’s stupid to have such a fairytale thought but I was prepared for the fight. I was willing to do anything I could to try and be together.”

Hands push through Vil’s hair, he hated that he could feel his eyes welling up. No. Vil was not going to cry tonight. “Never did I think you would just break up with me. Seven, Idia, you didn’t even give me a warning!”

“I… I wanted to use up every second I had…” Idia speaks softly. 

“Of course. You were always selfish.” Vil says, head shaking. “And I wanted you to be selfish about me. I wanted you to want me enough to work through the hardship.”

The black now fully consumed Idia’s tips. They hunch into themselves for a moment before they bring up both of their hands and aggressively rub at their face, hands going under the glasses. 

“I regret it.” He finally speaks, albeit a bit muffled by the hands. Vil can hear nonetheless. “I regretted it every day of my life. I knew I would but… I… I-I’m an idiot, Vil! You’re right! I’m the useless one in the party, you might as well leave me at camp! My stats suck!”

Vil couldn’t believe that after all this time, she could still understand what Idia was trying to say. 

“You are an idiot. A massive one.” Vil says. Idia’s shoulders slump. 

“...This…this isn’t how I-I thought it would go…”

“Really? I don’t know how you didn’t. Did you think I was going to accept you with open arms?” Vil scoffs, nose to the air.

“I knew you wouldn’t. It’s what I love…ah, um…. loved about you. That you stand your ground…” Idia says, finally allowing his hands to fall at his sides. “But, I meant us. For a moment after everything with Ortho and my… my overblot, I thought my lack of involvement would become my new normal. I had thought we would be together and I’d get to live this life with you I hadn’t thought I’d be able to before.” Idia scoffs, a humorless laugh poking through. “How naive… That all came crashing down when my parents called me days before graduation to see how I was. And to check if I was ready to be a fulltime S.T.Y.X. employee.”

Vil softens at that. “...I didn’t know that.”

“I didn’t want you to know. I-I sort of wanted you to hate me.” They say. “I wanted you to think I was a horrible person so the break up would be, I-I don’t know… easier for you, I guess…?”

“Easier for—” Vil cuts himself off with a scoff of his own. He shakes his head as he pushes his tongue against the inside of his bottom lip. “Please, Idia, I could never hate you. Even now, I don’t hate you.”

“You should.” 

“But I don’t.” She shrugs, head shaking again. “It was so hard for me. My heart broke that day. All I could do was replay that moment over and over. Trust me, I wanted to hate you. I wanted to think about all the ways I would curse you or poison you if I could. But, all I did was miss you.”

Vil sighs. “All I do is miss you.” She admits. At that, Idia’s eyes widen like saucers. Stiffened there for a moment, Vil waits with anxious anticipation as Idia gets their bearings. 

“W-What?” They finally choke out. 

“That’s why the date didn’t work out tonight.” Vil says, pink blush dusting her cheeks. If her heart could pound any harder, it would burst right out of her chest. “That’s why any date never worked out. I… pathetically… would put them up against you and against what we had.”

“I knew it was wrong to do so. But, I just… I couldn’t help it. I wasn’t ready to fall out of love.”

With each word, Vil could see Idia attempting to soak it all in. In truth, Vil was just as stunned. He couldn’t believe how easy it was to admit all of this, now that he was. But, that’s how they had been before. Unafraid to tell each other their feelings.

“...I…” Idia closes his eyes tightly, hands gripping the end of his ponytail. “I never stopped….!” He exclaims now, wringing his hair. 

His eyes were still closed, which was a shame because Vil wanted to search into them to see if this was real. And he wonders, for the first time, if this was some sort of dream. That maybe, he’d wake up on the couch and would be just as alone as he had been. But the cut, the blush on his cheeks, his heart pounding so loud in his ears—this was real. This was happening. 

Pink started to grow in Idia’s hair, finally replacing that horrible black color. 

“I never stopped either.” She finally speaks.

Idia’s eyes fly open. And suddenly, all at once, his hair engulfs in pink. 

“You… you….” Idia speaks softly at first. “....Eh?!”

“Come on, Idia. Don’t you think I would’ve kicked you out? No, actually. You wouldn’t have ever passed the front door.” Vil can’t help the quirk of her lips, a ghost of a smile. “I wouldn’t have indulged in any of this if I wasn’t.”

All Idia could do was blink. And it becomes very apparent to Vil that Idia hadn’t expected this to happen. In fact, she could bet that they probably thought Vil was going to kick her out.

“But… what difference does it make?” Vil asks. “You’re still in S.T.Y.X., right? Why… Idia, why did you show up today? Now? Why not several months ago? Or years?”

At that question, Idia seems to lighten up. 

“Since going back, I’ve been trying to find a way to be able to limit my attendance! At first, I had thought it would be way more of a challenge, but because of my brothers’ interference during my overblot, I was able to get into the system more than ever before! Don’t get me wrong, it was still tricky. S.T.Y.X. technology is packed with security measures, not to mention restrictions in nearly all software and documents.”

“But, Ortho helped me! And uh, if you can believe it, even mom and dad. And together we were able to find a way to be able to ah—” Idia stops, sheepishly scratching the back of his neck. “These terms are going to fly by you…. uh TL;DR: I’m able to remote in from anywhere without needing to be within S.T.Y.X. and with heavy, heavy encryption. But, mwehehe, who’s even smart enough to hack me? But ah, I’ll still have to go in from time to time… probably once or twice a week… Depends, really…” 

“Wait…” Vil starts. “Wait, wait… so… you don’t have to live there?”

Finger scratches at his cheek. “No.” Idia says. “I don’t have to live there.”

Vil blinks, mouth agape as all he could do was stare. What? Was this… How… The amount of times Vil had hoped for this…!

“...And that took seven years?” She asks incredulously.

“Yeah, can you believe it? Ortho and I ran the numbers and we thought it would take way longer because of the sheer amount of data. But, mwehehe, we only took that as a challenge! Seven years is pretty impressive, right?!” 

Vil still couldn’t believe it. It’s like the information wasn’t sinking and yet? It was totally, absolutely resonating with her. Did this mean… but they shouldn’t… No. No, Vil needed to be realistic! What? She couldn’t just jump into his arms! Right? Right! Of course… right?

“So… that means…?” She says, stepping forward. Eyes focus between Idia’s right and left. It’s like she’s searching for something, anything, to put a damper in this moment. Or, maybe, to bring her back to reality!

That doesn’t seem to happen.

“Vil. I want to try again.” Idia says slowly, wanting to make sure they wouldn’t stutter. “I love you.” 

Vil feels absolutely breathless. What…was this? What is happening right now? Not once… not ever did he think this would happen. She was so sure, positive, that Idia had moved on. That it was only she who had been stuck. 

Vil couldn’t remember a time Idia had ever pulled such a move like this. 

Even before, Vil had been the initiator of a lot of their firsts. If it hadn’t been her persistence, they probably wouldn’t have gotten together. Eventually, once they were more comfortable, Idia would initiate but Vil always made the first move. 

Now Idia was making that first move. Now Idia was fighting for Vil. 

“...Idia…I…” She breathes out. Hands grip his own arms. They want to reach out for the other. “This… hah… Idia, I must sit down.”

They move on their own, pulling a stool over for her. Goodness, they move like they know this home. Like they belong here… what was happening?!

“Y-You don’t have to give me an answer…! Now or uh, ever…. i-if you don’t want to!” Idia speaks. She can see it, the beginning of their insecurity starting to eat at them. “This isn’t fair of me to do to you. I know.”

Vil sits slowly, taking those seconds to breathe. Just… breathe. 

“I’m still in love with you too.” He says, the words cascading out like a waterfall. He thinks it isn’t much of a secret, he had already implied it, didn’t he? Still, that seems to affect Idia. Pink hair now comes to life; the flames dance.

“R-Really?!” They ask, leaning forward. 

“Yes. I never stopped, I practically admitted this already.” Vil says. They’re not blind to the small smile starting to grow on Idia’s face. And it’s something she absolutely needed to put a stop to this instant. If he actually smiles completely? Fully and beautifully? Vil might very well let them get away with murder. 

“I-I know, but to hear you say it so openly—” 

“But,” she cuts in, raising a finger to also create some distance between them. And it works, Idia pulls back to avoid it altogether. “I have my reservations. There will be rules… no. They will be laws.”

Idia nods quickly. “The walkthrough…. Got it.”

“We have to start over. I’m not foolish enough to say we have to ignore the past—remembering it is how we save ourselves from making the same mistakes. But, I want to be taken out on a first date. We’ve been out of each other’s lives for so long. We’re different people now.” He says, before the finger he’s held up is joined by the middle finger next to it.

“Second, you have to promise me you’ll communicate—especially if it involves something that will, eventually, involve me too! I want to be able to help you if you need it, but I also want to be prepared if things get difficult or otherwise.”

Idia nods quickly again. “O-Okay… that’s fair.”

A third finger joins in. “...This is your second and your last strike, Idia. I don’t believe in giving someone more than two chances.” She shakes her head at them. “I don’t want to go through that pain again.”

“I promise,” Idia starts. “I won’t mess up this time. I-I won’t let myself lose you again…!”

“Please, Idia. Don’t lose me.” He speaks candidly and vulnerably. He really, really wanted Idia to get it right this time. “And I’ll promise not to mess up either.”

Idia scoffs. “You never messed up, Vil.”

“Still.” She shrugs. “I still want to promise it.”

Idia blinks for a moment, the ghost of a smile starting to pull at the corner of his lips. Vil watches as they massage the bridge of their nose, right where the glasses sit, before he looks up at the ceiling. She can see now that the smile has grown more. And then, suddenly, Idia’s excited laugh bursts through. 

“I…I can’t believe it!” They say, looking back at Vil now. “I’ll have to thank Ortho when I get back…! I—c-can I hug you…?!” 

Again, as always, Idia proves that they are not as predictable as Vil thinks they are. It startles a laugh out of her before she gets up. Vil’s consent comes in the form of hugging Idia first, but it doesn’t take long for the other to reciprocate. With Vil’s arms going around their neck, their own go around Vil’s waist. 

And it… it feels like home. Seven, it feels so much like home. He knew he missed this feeling but he didn’t realize it was this intense. Vil absolutely melts into it. A deep inhale gives Vil the pleasant realization that Idia still used the same detergent. All at once, the emotion makes his heart burst. 

This was where he was meant to be. Always. 

They stay like that for minutes. Hours? Vil doesn’t really know, but when they finally started to pull back, she had this strange feeling like it wasn’t enough. The disappointment settles in her stomach. She just wasn’t ready to pull away yet. 

And as they do, each of them pulling back just enough to look the other in the eyes, the tension and air between them is thick. The emotion was sparking off of them and the other was soaking it up. 

Vil isn’t sure who made that first move, but her eyes flutter close as she feels Idia’s forehead press into hers. Thank Seven, each and every one of them, for bringing them back to him. 

Vil’s eyes open at a half-lid and he can’t help it when they fall onto Idia’s lips. They should go slow. Vil had just said they needed to start over. But, words couldn’t really hold up against history sometimes. History and strong feelings. 

Again, Vil wasn’t sure who started moving first. Hell, he hadn’t even realized Idia’s eyes were open too. All he felt was lips, slightly chapped, pressed against his. 

And this? Oh… oh, this was like a desert traveler’s first sip of water. She was so damn parched. Idia’s kiss is a lifeline. The kiss deepens quickly. The taste of Idia is familiar and yet exciting and new. Vil missed this. Seven, Vil loved this. Loves this. 

Vil is so in love with Idia. 

When they part, both of them needing air, they don’t untangle from each other right away. In fact, it seems they’re both content with staying right here. 

“...You don’t have to leave right away, do you?” She asks in a whisper. They’re so close, there’s no need to speak any louder. 

“No.” Idia answers. “Even if I had to… I-I wouldn’t go. I can’t now.”

Vil smiles before a small laugh pushes past her lips. She bites her bottom lip for a moment before placing her head into his neck. 

“Stay with me tonight, then.” It sounds like a demand more than a request. 

Idia’s own breathy laugh shows itself next. “Okay.”