#once again though this is out of context no one come for me pls + ty

[ghoulbats]

“short grass is good” - joel smallishbeans, 2024

[lunamochii]

2:04

a/n; i literally wrote this out of spite so please expect grammatical erros and wrong spelling! Don't forget to comment your reactions and feedbacks! Also, pls reblog with tags!!

warnings; mature, smut without plot(or a lil bit of context), mdni

Messing with Sylus is all fun and games until he decides to put you in place and have you remember of who he really is.

"Hm, what's this? Already wet? But I barely did anything yet, kitten."

He got your body press up against the cold glass window that faces that city lights, his long and slender fingers tuck inside your mouth while his other hand is busy pumping your tight cunt

"Weren't you giggling back at the cafe by playfully running your hands around my thighs?"

"It w-was—"

You yelp when he suddenly plunge his fingers back in but this time instead of two, he inserted three fingers

"Uh-uh are you going to say your same pathetic reason again?"

He remove the his fingers that was in your mouth and squeeze your cheeks, tilting your head up so you can meet his gaze

"No! I was gwonna shay thawt— mwore- Sylus!"

He laugh seeing how you couldn't even finish your sentence when he starts to rub your clit with his thumb

"You're so cute, darling. Now, be a good girl and place both of your hands on the window."

You did as what he told and gave you a good hard spank and his name drips out from your lips

"Hmm let me hear more. C'mon...."

Aside from the sound of the running water from his bathtub, the spanking sound echoes throughout the bathroom silencing the other noises

Sylus moans out your name before plunging his cock deep inside you and your thankful that this window doesn't break easily because it is your only support on trying to balance yourself.

He put one of your legs up with you balancing on the tub as he relentlessly bully your wet cunt, his big calloused hands groping your breast and his lips leaving marks all over your shoulder

"So deep! Your cock is so deep inside me, Sy! Give it to me harder, please!"

"I knew you were a fighter."

He smirks and pulled you out from the tub. He made you face the glass window again and in one swift move he got your legs parted. The cool air brushes against your expose cunt making you instinctively close your legs but he got a firm grip

"Don't make unnesecarry movement. Wouldn't want to drop you, not that it would happen though."

He breathes in your scent and moans your name right on to your ear

"Please fuck me... I need your cock inside me, Sy. So bad, please."

"Damn, princess. When did you get so good at begging?"

He got his cock brushing against your cunt and you just want him to put it in

"Just so needy! Please Sy, won't you fuck me?"

"Don't come complaining that you can't walk."

Your nails dug deep on to his arms as he push his big cock in to your pussy, no matter how wet and stretch you are, his cock is always way too big for you. He watch how your boobs bounces and how your eyes droop with your tongue desperately licking your lips

"Face me."

When you did, he shove his tongue into your mouth and he got you moaning through the kiss. One of your hand move to grab on to his hair.

You close your eyes and just let Sylus handle you, you know that he won't let any harm come to you.

"I'm going to cum! Sylus! Fuck fuck!"

"Together!! Take my cock, take it!!"

You both scream each other's name as his cum filled your insides and your juices squirting out from you. Sylus didn't miss the chance and rapidly rub your clit making you cry out as he push one more orgasm from you before setting you down, letting your back once again touches the cold window and eats you out

"Holy shit— s'too much— Sylus!"

"One more— your scent is so addicting..."

He inserted two fingers and thrust it faster and his tongue flicking back and forth on your clit, you keep on moaning out his name and with that you began to ride his face and Sylus began to make choking noises as you push your hips down, both of his hands are now grabbing on to your leg

"Fuck fuck fuck!!"

You bit your lower lip and came undone on to his mouth, he lap your juices and made sure to drink it all. When his done, he place one last kiss on your cunt before standing up and hugging you tight

"Have you learn your lesson, kitten?"

He says softly while rubbing your ass cheeks

"Maybe.."

"Hmm~ such a naughty kitten. Guess, we'll go for more rounds until you understand."

You were about to retort when he stop you by planting a kiss to your lips

"I don't wanna hear more complains from you. Kneel down and clean the mess you made on my dick.

You look down and saw that it's still hard and standing proud. You gulp and slowly got on your knees, his hand resting on your hair grabbing a fistful of it

"Now, be a good kitten and clean my cock."

[banj0possum]

Heyo! Hope you're doing alright! Firstly, sorry if this is too long... summary: yan oc reactions to male/gn reader with a high pain tolerance whose platonic affection language is rough housing (biting , headbutts, body slams/shoulder bumps, aggressive bear hugs, or a good grip/squeeze. All of these forms of affection are done by reader with as much force as is allowed without actual damage and which reader happily reciprocates). Bonus, what're the reactions of rough housing intolerant yans when said reader starts trying to find someone else as an outlet for this affection need. Context: I saw the mini react to the affectionate chair wielding and had a thought. I am a very energetic and affectionate individual with folks I'm close with, and often times a gentle hug or soft touch just isn't enough to get across the energy and emotion or i just NEED something more grounding/comforting cause "yes this gentle hug is comforting my stress a little but i really REALLY need you to crush my soul and being back together with this next hug. Really trash compactor my body so i can feel whole again :) 💪". It's what i grew up with and what some of my friends encouraged/reciprocated (have definitely popped backs when giving each other hugs and once i popped someone's fingers when i was allowed a good squeeze). When soft affections aren't hitting right (and i have permission from my friend) I tend to turn to play bites (at whatever maximum safe pressure is allowed by the person being bitten), headbutts, body slams/shoulder bumps (again, at a maximum safe force that is allowed), and harsh grips/hugs (again, whatever maximum safe force is allowed). It's really a grounding/comforting thing cause it allows me and my friend to destress, release energy, and also kinda reassures us that we're truly physically and emotionally there. It's definitely not something for all my friend circles and i usually turn to my high energy friend circles that have similar needs (and they come to me if they feel the urge as well). A good example is the time Friend A saw me out and about, shouted out my name and charged me full speed from 30 feet away. I tanked the brunt of their full body affectionate tackle and honestly? Was one of the happiest and closest i felt to my friend. Haven't done that in a while cause we got warned not to do that again by personnel lol. We usually try to meet up at parks (cause indoor places understandably don't like when a group of adults start rough housing) though it's hard to rn cause of the heat and stuff

OCs w/ a Rowdy Darling

My OCs x GN Reader

THIS IS LITERALLY AMAZING !! you seem like a really cool person to hang out with ! id definitely let you give me a back popping hug >w< not sure if im strong enough to give you a hug as strong as that though hehe ^^" anyways heres the fic ! (´ ∀ ` *)

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Adrian is literally the same as you. Every shove or punch or rough housing is a sign of affection.

You two probably rough house all the time ngl, and he loves it!

You're his energetic little lover and he's all for it!

You two might have gone to detention for rough housing to hard a few times hehe..

If you bear hug him, he'll try to hug you harder, it's like a competition to him!

Honestly, he sees everything as a competition. You push him playfully? He'll push you harder.. headbutts? You might get a slight headache after he's done..

He might be your boyfriend, but he's still a bit of a bully, but it's all in good fun! He stops if ever he notices you're getting uncomfy.

Not a biter though, but when you do it, he melts like putty!

He loves how strong and rowdy you are and that you're not afraid to express it, it shows how tough and confident you are!

He likes his gentle moments once in a while, but being able to love you in a love language you both share is so special to him <3

"Cmon babe! One more hug! I can take it!"

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Brandon is kind of impressed..

He's one of the best football players in his school and his little darling is biting and shoving and headbutting him, so adorable!

You remind him of a little goat, so excited and happy and lively!

Definitely makes him more protective of you because of how precious you are to him.

If you get to rowdy for his liking, he grabs you and traps you in a bear hug until you calm down or if you give him an even tighter bear hug than the one he's giving you.

Invites you to play a bit of football with him and his team.

But protection is key! He wraps you in all sorts of gear before you play, he knows how high your pain tolerance is but he still wants to keep you safe! and also he likes seeing you wear his helmet

Your body slams are praised not just by him but by his team, it's too cute!

If he catches you being your little rowdy self around anyone else, he'll get jealous fast..

He shoves you affectionately to get your attention.

"Heya baby! How's my little ram doing huh?"

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Valeth just thinks you're copying him in a way and is flattered.

Aweee, little mate is so strong and tough! He's so proud!

Encourages the behavior, as long as you don't hurt yourself!

He's much stronger than you so your affections don't do much, but you bet your ass he's putting his whole soul in pretending to get hurt.

Rough houses with you as if you were a little child play fighting, he loves playing with his little warrior!

If you do get hurt, he's putting all play fighting to a halt! He's checking up on you and making sure you're ok with the softest voice you've ever heard from an orc.

You might be fine but he's not taking no for an answer, you're getting some rest!

Love love loves your bearhugs! He tests your strength and lets you squeeze him as hard as you can!

Biting is met with kisses all over your face, it's what you get for being so cute!

Body slams are more like you latching onto him and trying not to fall off because of how large he is..

"Oh my little duckling can bite! How fierce! You're so strong haha!"

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Bo appreciates how energetic and lively you are, but please no rough housing ;-;

He doesn't want you to get hurt or hurt anyone else, even though you're perfectly capable of regulating how rough you can me, he's just a lil protective is all

He only allows bear hugs and squeezes, anything else is greeted by the time out corner (him trapping you in his arms in the bed until you give up)

"Now now hun, not so rough ok? I don't want you gettin banged up or anythin.."

Ribs is also a feral little man and absolutely loves that you're as rowdy as him!

You two love play fighting and biting affectionately!

He loves your headbutts! he returns them all the time

"Ahahaha! Again again!"

Soda tolerates it, he just appreciates that you're comfortable enough to rough house with him.

He's not the energetic type but he'll give you sleepy kisses and squeeze you back if you bear hug him

Doesn't bite but he likes nibbling on you

He's not as lively as you, but he loves reciprocating your affection!

"You're so strong hehe~"

Screw is scared

He is oddly aroused

He's also hopelessly trying to stop himself from called you sir or daddy or any dominant title because oh my god you are so awesome

He's looking at you with puppy dog eyes asking for your love and attention

PICK HIM UP TOSS HIM AROUND SHOVE HIM BITE HIM PLEASE HE LOVES IT!

Imagine him kicking his legs and rambling about you to the others

"H-hello si- dadd- (Y/N)! Hi (Y/N) heheh.."

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Wolfie loves how rowdy you are! he loves playing!

That's his way of telling you he loves you, but of course he's extra gentle when playing with you, he wouldn't wanna get his mate scratched up!

Loves rolling around and playing around with you, it makes him feel like a pup again!

Doesn't like you biting him though, you might get something icky in your mouth!

Licks you all over if you get hurt or get a little too rough to make you feel better!

Headbutts are rewarded with his big paws bopping you on the head like he's trying to pet you!

If he's tired and you're being your lively little self, he just takes you and sleeps on top of you so you can't escape.

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Dorik actually has a lot of brothers and sisters back in hell and you remind him so much of how they used to play around with him.

As much as he adores cuddling you close and doing gentle and calm things with you, he loves how tough you are!

Yes he moans when you bite him.

Everytime you're affectionate with him, he can't help but kiss you all over, you're just so cute!

Almost cries if you give him bear hugs, this man is touchstarved!!!!

He gives you his own love by wrapping his tail around you or rubbing his face into your clothes, chest, hair, anywhere! He loves how you smell so good everyday!

Shrieks if you body slam him, but somehow he's as solid as a rock, he didn't even stumble..

But he's all over you asking if you're ok.

"Master? My love? My darling are you alright?!"

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Kalva unfortunately doesn't like rough-housing, he's made it a rule that you can only mess around outside the nest!

But he adores your bearhugs and headbutts and bites, they're comforting to him in a way, it shows that you're close to him!

He headbutts you too, it's his way of asking for your love and attention.

For a while it was also how he kissed you since he didn't know how to do it properly yet.

He might indulge in your rough ways sometimes by jumping around and messing up his feathers on purpose, but you should promise to help preen them afterwards!

Nevertheless, he loves you to bits and just wants to keep you safe <3

"My mate is so excited! My mate is happy!"

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Jasper is scared for his life but in a fun way.

He never knows the next time you're gonna bite him or tackle him into a hug, it's like a game for you both.

He gets you back by surprise tickling you, it's pretty effective.

If he expects the biting, he definitely bites you too, kissing the area right after for extra measure.

Don't get me wrong he's absolutely flustered whenever you do it, but he gets used to it after a while.

But no rough-housing with him! He's fragile and might break something.

Legit asks you to crack his back if ever he's having back aches.

"Hey love, my back's a little weird again, can I get another hug~?"

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Viktor is surprised and a little intrigued.

Oh? My darling is so energetic, I love it!

If you ever try anything on him, he chuckles and 'punishes' you with kisses all over your face and cuddles you until you give up.

Your bites kind of freak him out

Like he's supposed to bite people! It's kind of weird having people bite him, it's a bit exciting..

"My my~ Is my little bat misbehaving again~?"

Garrick doesn't tolerate roughness at all.

You might get hurt! What if one of them reciprocates the affection and goes too far? He's not having it!

That is until you do it to him and he absolutely melts at your cuteness.

He goes from strict to 100% on board with your love bops

Refuses to bear hug you, he might break your spine because of how much he loves you!

"Remember to be careful my turtledove! And I love you!"

Silas is all in on your rowdiness, considering he's like that himself.

He's a mischievous little shit and loves play fighting with you.

Loves picking you up and spinning you around, making you hold onto him as you two giggle like young lovers together.

Always does this thing where he cups your face and shakes your head side to side, he says its because you're too cute and your face must be a mask because no one is that perfect!

Gives you gentle and soft kisses after your rough moments because he wants to make sure he didn't hurt you. He feels the need to remind you always how much you mean to him and how happy you make him feel.

"My little owl, so cute, so adorable~ I'll never leave you Darling~"

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Baron tries his best to keep you calm but you're just to fuckin adorable!

He's a cold hard assassin! Why is he smiling over weak little attempts to hurt him?!

Scolds you for rough housing but his heart breaks if you pout or if he hurts your feelings

Immediately says sorry and holds your hand tight to show he still loves you, he just doesn't wanna see you potentially hurt yourself.

If you're rough with anyone else, he's pulling you off and dragging you away whilst holding you in the tightest bear hug, his actions screaming out 'you're mine!'

Of course he denies it all, saying excuses like 'what if they think you wanna pick a fight?'

But you know he's just jealous that you're not giving him that attention.

Still doesn't tolerate bodyslams or bites but bear hugs, headbutts and squeezing his hand are highly appreciated. Highly

"How about we settle down now boss hm~? I'll run you a nice hot bath if you'd like~"

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Caspian is a wimpy little bitch and gets upset if you play fight with him.

He'll start whining for you to stop but like also whine if you stop giving him attention. (little shit)

Lives for your bear hugs! SQUEEZE HIM HARDER PLEASE!!!

Headbutts make him dizzy and otherwise just confused but he appreciates it and thinks you're trying to kiss him.

He'll pull you close and show you what a real kiss is like~

Bite him and he's flustered.

Like about to have a stroke and can't form a complete sentence flustered.

"Ohohoh~ Oh my~ H-how fascinating~!"

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Hallow loves playing! Wait what are you doi-

Gets the message (i think) and starts to play fight with you too, chasing you around the house and wrapping you up in his long arms to tickle you all over!

Pretends to be a scary monster and nuzzles his face into you once he catches you, imitating eating. That's what you get for trying to fight the big spooky Hallow!

Your headbutts and affections make him so happy he starts jingling from how much he's trying to hold back.

He loves roughing you up a bit too, but his little bops aren't so strong since he's made of cotton and love <3 <3 <3

If you're getting a bit too rough, he wraps you up and kisses you softly before letting you go once you calm down.

"You tired from lovin on me all day sweetie~? It's alright, I got a looooootta lovin left for you~!"

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Ashvan is terrified!

On one hand eeeeee so cute! He wants to return your affections so bad!!!

But also you might die???

He's a big guy, and he's aware of his size and strength, so he's pretty wary on how he handles you.

You're like a little porcelain doll to him! He'd be so sad if anything happened to you just because he wanted to express his love to you!

He loves your bops, but giving you a warm smile and a kiss is all he can do really.

He makes up for it in giving you gifts, helping around the infirmary, cuddling you at night, the little things.

He wished he was more gentle so he can do the things you do to him! He so wishes to hug you as hard as he can!

"S-so cute...I-I mean so uhm..strong and fierce haha! So not adorable and precious in every way possible! Yeah.."

[duskandcobalt]

Everywhere, Everything: Chapter Seven

Chapter Summary: Elain heads back to Velaris for Christmas after rejecting Graysen's marriage proposal.

Word Count: 6.6k

Warnings: mentions of dv (please see authors note below), smattering of smut (18+ pls)

Missed the first six chapters? You can find the Masterlist for this fic here 🥰

A/N: *peaks out from the hole I've been hiding in* heyyyy  😅

Once again, I must begin by saying thank you for all your lovely comments and messages about this fic and all the others. I cannot appreicate how much it means to me. A special thank you to everyone who's checked in with me over the past few months and given me kindess, support, and patience. There are some lovely people on this app and I am so honoured that you choose to read and engage with my fic.

Please note that there is a very brief mention of domestic violence in this chapter within the context of a conversation. If that's something you'd rather skip reading, please feel free to do what's best for you.

ENJOY XX

Read on AO3

The fire was dwindling down, empty cups were scattered on every available surface, Christmas music played over the speakers, and wrapping paper was strewn on the floor of Azriel’s living room. 

It’d been a Christmas like all the others - drinking and eating and lots of gifts exchanged, though Nyx had made out the best of  anyone, spoiled rotten by all of his aunties and uncles. They’d played a few games, exchanged a bit of gossip about mutual acquaintances, and throughout all the festivities, Azriel had kept a careful eye on Elain. 

He watched her now, his brows pulling together above the rim of the whisky glass he’d raised up to his lips. She was sitting quietly in her usual spot on his couch, lazily tracing circles around the rim of her nearly empty wine glass. 

There was something different about her tonight that he couldn't quite place but he was determined to figure out. While everyone else had been enjoying themselves, he could sense a peculiar cloud of something sad that seemed to follow Elain around no matter how hard she tried to smile and laugh and pretend like everything was okay when it was clear - to him, at least - that things were far from fine.

His first sign that something was wrong was when Elain had walked into his house earlier, avoiding eye contact and barely even bothering with a proper hug as she muttered a ‘Merry Christmas’ and a ‘thank you for hosting’ all while hiding behind a pile of gifts stacked tall in her arms. Even when she'd come back home with Graysen in tow she hadn't held back from him like that and her iciness had caught him completely off guard. 

He’d been so anxious to see her again after all this time, that he hadn’t fully considered the reality of the situation. Azriel knew that the last time they’d seen each other had been tense but it hadn't ended badly by any means. And sure, he hadn't spoken to her properly in well over half a year but she replied to his sparse texts and he still woke up to a voice note from her on his birthday so he’d figured that that had to count for something. That maybe that was to be their new normal. He’d resigned himself to taking what he could get - that’s what he’d told her after all on Nesta’s porch that night. He wanted her in his life in whatever way he could have her. 

The second thing to clue him in that something was wrong was that right after she’d placed the presents under the Christmas tree, Elain had made a beeline to the kitchen and poured herself a shot of whatever bottle of alcohol her eyes had landed on first.

It wasn't that he wasn't used to seeing her drink, although she’d certainly never been a drinker in the way the rest of their friend group indulged, but he’d never once seen her drink like this - knocking back shot after shot when she thought no one was watching. It was rare for her to even pour a drink without asking if she could. Almost a decade of knowing her and Elain always asked permission no matter how many times he insisted that she help herself to whatever she wanted. 

Azriel had counted at least seven trips to the kitchen tonight - all for a drink, none for food. Even the speciality cheese she adored and that he’d purchased just for her after she confirmed her attendance, sat untouched. But for having downed a minimum of seven drinks, she didn’t really appear to be all that drunk. He had to give her credit because she held her alcohol surprisingly well - the only real give away that she was drunk was a slight stumble as she stood up from the sofa the last time she went to the kitchen and a droop to her eyelids that could be attributed to exhaustion.

Elain had sat quietly most of the night, speaking only when spoken to and channelling most of her attention on Nyx when he’d been awake but now that her nephew was fast asleep on the sofa next to her, Shadow curled up at his feet, she had no real distraction and Azriel watched curiously as she shifted uncomfortably in her seat, opening her mouth a dozen times as if to speak only to seemingly decide against it and retreat back into herself. 

He’d planned on once again cornering her to try and figure out what the hell was going on and to see if there was absolutely anything he could do to ease whatever clearly ailed her. He’d intended to follow her into the kitchen the next time she went to drown her sorrows but he never got the chance because after a prolonged moment of silence amongst the group - she finally spoke. 

Azriel all but froze as Elain cleared her throat and wrung her hands together in her lap, tugging at the sleeves of the long sleeved black top she was wearing. Her empty glass of wine had been carefully placed on the coffee table in front of her.

“Graysen proposed,” she hiccupped, nervously tucking her hair behind her ears as she delivered her news without even a second of preamble. 

The two words were softly spoken and she’d said them in one breath with no break in between but Azriel heard her loud and clear.

His stomach dropped, the three or four drinks he’d consumed turned sour in his stomach and did very little to ease the pain of his heart slamming against his chest as Nesta and Feyre began firing off question after question - all of which were ignored by Elain and none of which he could actually hear over the incessant buzzing in his ears. 

He prayed that he’d heard her wrong. Prayed that there was no way she’d actually said what he thought she’d said. It wasn’t until he saw Feyre reach for Elain’s left hand that Azriel forced himself to focus, his eyes zeroing in on her fingers - at the vacant space where one would expect to find a ring after an announcement such as the one Elain had just made. 

“I said no,” she whispered, catching Feyre’s confused expression as her sister’s index finger slid over Elain’s bare skin. 

No. 

She’d said no. She’d said no. She’d said no. 

Azriel repeated the words to himself over and over again as it was his own personal mantra, drilling it into his head as he finally allowed himself to breathe. He couldn’t look at her face, couldn’t bear to find out what expression he’d find there. All he could do was stare at her hand - at that perfect, unadorned finger - no glimmering diamond to be found. 

“A few months ago,” he heard her tell the girls. 

“Why’d you say no?” Nesta asked, her voice soft although Azriel could hear the smallest inkling of relief in it that mirrored his own feelings. He wondered if maybe Nesta had seen through Graysen’s facade as well and had quietly hoped that her cousin would come to her senses and leave him. 

Azriel tore his attention away from Elain’s fingers and up to her face only to watch as her eyes lifted to meet his for a fleeting moment before she quickly looked away from him and back to Nesta. 

“I don’t know,” she shrugged. “We hadn’t even talked about it and I was caught so off guard. It just didn’t feel right.” She took a deep, staggering breath, Azriel could see the shimmer of tears beginning to well along her lash line. “I don’t think I ever really loved him…. I never really like them all that much.”

She said the last part to herself, a drunken admission whispered to the floor. It was a confession that she’d spent her entire adult life with men that she didn’t even truly care for. Azriel couldn’t bring himself to wonder why she did what she did or why she’d finally admitted it. He wouldn’t let himself consider that maybe she found herself staying in meaningless relationship after meaningless relationship for the same reason he found himself avoiding them all together. 

“I think… I think I may need to lay down,” Elain muttered after a moment of tense, awkward silence. It was clear that no one in the room quite knew what to say or do. Feyre and Nesta were staring at her dumbfounded. Cassian and Rhys were exchanging mildly panicked looks as they tried to figure out what to do in this situation. “I feel a little dizzy all of a sudden.”

“Come upstairs,” Azriel was on his feet before he could even think to stop himself, speaking without even consciously meaning to as he bypassed Feyre and Nesta to get to Elain. He stepped forward, one hand outstretched towards her. 

He didn't miss the look Feyre gave Nesta. A silent enquiry as to whether they should let him take her upstairs - as if the two of them knew what had happened the last time he and Elain had been left alone on Christmas. Nesta just nodded, one subtle dip of her chin that had Feyre watching in stunned silence as Elain placed her hand in Azriel’s. 

Neither of the girls had ever said anything to him about that night other than to acknowledge that Elain had, in fact, flown home the following morning. An emergency at work was the flimsy excuse Nesta had given him the following day when he’d called her and done his best to enquire about Elain’s whereabouts without raising any suspicion. 

Azriel carefully pulled Elain up, keeping her hand in his as his other arm wrapped around her waist to keep her upright as he slowly and carefully led her up his stairs, guiding her to the guest room a couple doors down from his own bedroom. 

He flipped back the duvet and sat her down on the bed. He could feel her eyes on him as she silently watched him lower himself to his knees so he could unzip her boots and slide them off her feet. 

“Lay back,” he tapped gently on her calf, hands hovering around her in case she needed help. 

“Not the first time you’ve said that to me,” Elain quipped, flopping back in a less than graceful manner before turning onto her side to face him. There was the tiniest smirk on her lips, the smallest bit of amusement shining in her sad eyes. He almost found himself smiling at the drunken comment until her expression changed, those pretty lips of hers turning down at the corners. 

“Az.. will you stay with me? After everyone goes?” 

Azriel grimaced, ignoring the pull from the part of his heart that was ready and willing to bend to her every whim. “I can’t, Elain.” 

“Why?” Her eyebrows pulled together to create a small crease on her forehead. He fought the urge to reach out and smooth away that visible line of tension with a gentle pass of his thumb. “You always used to stay with me.” 

“It’s different now,” he exhaled, shoulders dropping as he absentmindedly ran a hand through his hair. “You’re not mine, Elain.”

“That’s not true,” Elain frowned, fighting to keep her eyes open. “I’ve always been yours.” She said it with every bit of drunken sincerity in the world, whispered soft and sweet even as she lost the battle to sleep and her eyes began to flutter shut. 

Her words were like a knife to his heart. He knew she never would’ve said it if the amount of alcohol in her bloodstream didn’t outweigh her good senses. He had no idea whether she’d even remember any of this in the morning. 

“Why did you stay with him? If you didn’t love him? If you didn’t like any of the others? Why would you stay with them?” Azriel couldn’t help but ask, going against his better judgement to seek an explanation for the questions that had haunted him for years even if he knew that whatever answer she gave him, it was unlikely to offer him any semblance of peace. 

“It’s easier to pretend if there’s someone else,” Elain’s hands came up to her throat, her fingertips mindlessly searching for something. She frowned when she came up empty, her nails digging into the space between her collarbones instead. The sight unsettled Azriel enough to momentarily distract him from what she’d just said. 

The necklace he’d given her on her birthday a few years ago, the one she’d worn religiously every day since, the one that tethered her to him, was missing from her neck and it was like a punch to his gut. 

“The chain broke,” Elain whispered, having followed his line of sight to where he’d been openly staring at the place the gold pendant had sat against her skin for half a decade. “It’s in my bag, I was hoping you’d be able to fix it.”

Azriel nodded, relieved that she hadn’t actually taken the necklace off herself. He stood there, arms hanging uselessly at his side for a couple more seconds until her eyelids drifted shut once again. He walked towards the door, deciding to let her sleep this off, but he paused before he could leave, turning towards her once more. 

He thought maybe he was a sadist because asking these questions, pushing for these answers, would only serve to expand that ever growing crack in his heart. Still, he couldn't seem to help himself. 

“Lain?” Part of him hoped that she’d already drifted off to sleep, that she wouldn’t answer and he wouldn’t get to ask his question and have to hear her response.. 

“Yeah, Az?” The corner of her eyes crinkled as she looked at him, squinting. 

“What did you mean?” He asked. “When you said it’s easier to pretend?”

She paused for a moment, teeth scraping over her bottom lip as she turned so she was on her back, her eyes focused on the ceiling. 

“When I’m with someone else,” she started, voice so quiet that he had to strain to hear her over the music carrying up the stairs and under the gap in the door. “It’s easier to distract myself from the fact that sometimes I want you so badly, I think it might kill me.” 

The ache in his chest was so sharp and so immediate that he had to grip the handle on the door harder just to feel like he had some sort of control over his body. He had no idea what to do with that information. Had no idea what to say back. He’d waited what felt like a lifetime to hear her say those words to him, he’d just never imagined that it would be so painful. 

He couldn’t speak, could barely even remember his name. He hadn’t realised how long he’d been silent until he noticed that she’d fallen asleep, her head now tilted towards him. 

Azriel set his shoulders and backed out of the room, quietly shutting the door behind him. He took a deep breath, pushing back every bit of emotion that he felt, before slowly making his way back downstairs.

Elain stuck an arm out from under the covers, her fingers blindly reaching to her nightstand for her phone. It wasn’t until she felt the sharp corner of a wooden surface instead of the rounded edge of her own bedside table that she realised that she wasn’t at home in her own bed. She peeked out from under the covers, taking in her surroundings with one blurry eye. 

Light was beginning to filter in through a pair of cream curtains covering a rather large window. The bed she was in was comfy and not completely unfamiliar, the bed linen looked similar to a set that she’d helped Azriel choose back when they’d gone shopping for… 

“Fuck,” Elain groaned, sitting up and dragging her hands over her face. 

She wasn’t at home. She wasn’t in her designated room at her sister’s house. No - she’d been fast asleep in Azriel’s guest bedroom. 

It didn’t take much to figure out just how she’d ended up here. The pounding in her head and the dryness in her mouth were enough to tell her that she’d maybe taken it a little too far with the alcohol last night.

She’d started drinking before they’d even left Feyre’s, just a couple of glasses while getting ready that she told herself were for liquid courage. She’d known the second that they pulled into Azriel’s driveway that she’d need far more to get through seeing him again under a whole new set of circumstances that only she was privy to and so she’d thrown caution to the wind and had been throwing back drinks any chance she got. 

She really hadn’t even been planning on telling anyone about the proposal but after an hour or so of drinking, she’d felt the urge to say it - to let them know what had happened. To let them know she and Graysen were done. Elain couldn’t remember much past the moment she’d drunkenly blurted out the news.. she remembered Feyre and Nesta’s surprised faces and the faraway look on Azriel’s face when she’d dared to glance at him but everything past that moment seemed to be a blur. 

If she really tried to push for details, she could vaguely remember being helped up the stairs because she was too far gone to manage on her own but that was all her hungover brain could string together.

“Lain?” The low register of Azriel’s morning voice rumbled through the door as a knock lightly sounded on the surface. “You up? Can I come in?” 

“Yeah, come in!” She called back, wincing at how sore her voice sounded in her ears.

Elain sat up, quickly running a hand through her tangled hair as she propped up a pillow behind her and let the duvet fall to her waist. It was so much colder in this room than she’d expected and she didn’t fully register why until Azriel walked in. 

“Morning, how you feeling? I brought some -” he’d been halfway through his sentence, sleepy eyes scanning over her until they widened at the exact same time the tips of his ears went red. 

She’d lost her top at some point during the night - something she hadn’t realised until the cold morning air had hit her bare skin. Azriel turned around quickly, the glass of water in his hand sloshing over slightly with the speed at which he averted his gaze.  “Fuck. Sorry! I thought.. You said to come in and I thought… fuck .” 

Elain quickly tugged the sheets back up to her chin, fighting the urge to pull them over her head altogether and suffocate herself from embarrassment. Twice now, she’d woken up in Azriel’s house on the day after Christmas naked in one of his beds. Maybe next year she’d check off the last remaining room. 

“No, I’m sorry, I didn’t even realise I - wait, you can turn around…” she fumbled with her words, watching as he slowly turned to face her. His cheeks were pink and the hand that wasn’t cradling a glass of water and an entire pack of headache tablets came up to fidget with the worn neck of the old t-shirt he’d chucked on this morning. “I always get so hot at night and I usually sleep with a fan and I just must’ve… taken it off. I’m sorry.”

“It’s okay, I should’ve gotten you a change of clothes but I didn’t want to…” he trailed off, coming closer to hand her the water as he opened up the packet of tablets and slipped out a few. “I barely saw anything, if that helps.” 

Elain took the tablets from him. “Barely anything, huh?”

She took a small bit of satisfaction from the way he frowned in confusion before he caught on, the blush that had finally subsided from his cheeks came back full force. 

“ Not what I meant,” Azriel shook his head, raking a hand through his hair as she tossed back the tablets. “There’s plenty to see… just the right amount.”

“I’d stop speaking now if I were you,” Elain rolled her eyes. “Thank you for the tablets and the water and for letting me stay the night.”

“It’s nothing,” Azriel shrugged, gingerly sitting on the very edge of the bed. His eyes scanned over her again, lingering on the bare skin of her shoulder that had escaped the cover of the duvet before they slid to her fingers and then back up to her face. “Are you feeling alright?” 

“Could be better,” she answered, realising that she hadn’t actually gotten around to responding the first time he’d asked her. “Can’t drink like I used to, I suppose.”

“You’ve never drank like that, Lain.” Azriel chuckled. “I think that’s part of the problem.”

He was right. She was notoriously a lightweight when it came to alcohol and had never needed more than four or five drinks before she was just the right amount of drunk. 

“A shower and some food and I’ll feel brand new,” she sighed. 

“I’ll grab you a towel and some clothes,” he nodded, fingers mindlessly tapping at his knee. “Have a shower and come down, I’ll make you some breakfast and then if you’re up for it we can go over to the studio and I’ll fix your necklace. Fresh air might do you some good.” 

“You don’t have to do that, Az. I’ll call Feyre to pick me up and get out of your way.” Elain started to look around for where she might’ve tossed her top, suddenly anxious that she’d been here too long. That she was eating into his day, once again taking up time that she didn’t deserve. 

“I know that I don’t have to, Elain. I want to.” He insisted, voice gentle as ever as he looked over at her. “You aren’t in my way.”

Elain didn’t say anything, just looked down at her lap as he stood up, adjusting the waistband of the plaid pajama pants he had on. “Chocolate chip or blueberry?” 

“What?”

“Pancakes,” Azriel clarified, a shy grin on his lips. “Chocolate chip or blueberry?” 

“Blueberry, please.” Elain couldn’t help but mirror her grin, especially when her stomach audibly grumbled at the mere mention of food. 

An hour or so later, Elain sat quietly, perched  on a bench top in Azriel’s workshop. She was warm from the scorching shower she’d taken and clothed in an assortment of clothes that he’d handed her with a towel this morning - his shirt, his sweatpants… a lacy pair of underwear she recognised as the ones she hadn’t bothered to search for when she’d snuck out of his house the previous year.

She watched him as he took a seat, sliding a frame of protective glasses over his eyes before he fired up a small torch. He situated himself, leaning forward as he began to carefully solder Elain’s necklace back together. 

She told herself she was just watching a master at work but her attention had drifted from the actual work being done to focus on the movement of his deft fingers, the shifting muscles of his strong back and shoulders. She studied the side of his face - the slope of his nose, the concentrated furrow of his brows, the way his lips pressed together as he worked. 

She didn’t realise just how intensely she’d been staring at him until she found herself looking into his actual eyes rather than just his side profile. Elain quickly sat up straight, rolling her shoulders as she lowered her eyes and tried to keep her cheeks from flooding with colour. 

“You said the necklace broke while you were changing,” Azriel stood up, pushing his glasses back, using them like a headband to keep his thick hair off of his forehead. It was ridiculous that he managed to look good even like that. 

“The way the chain was broken,” he spoke carefully as he approached her. “It didn’t look like a simple snag, it looked like there was some force behind it. 

Elain swallowed, her cheeks now burning for an entirely different reason. She turned to look out of the window to her right, pretending to watch the snow as it drifted lazily from the cold, gray sky. 

“Lain?” Azriel tried again. He was standing in front of her now, just inches from her knees. “How did the necklace really break?”

Elain paused, unsure how to proceed or what to even say. She couldn’t lie to him. Not again. She’d told herself in the shower this morning - after she’d had a small cry and wallowed in self pity - that this needed to be a new start, that she couldn’t keep shutting him out. Especially now that she no longer had the excuse of having a boyfriend in the picture. 

“Graysen… he didn’t like the necklace very much,” she started. “He always had an issue with it, even before he met you. He didn’t like that I never took it off or that it was from a friend . It only got worse after he came home with me and saw us and then when I… when he proposed and I said no, he said that if I didn’t want to accept the ring, I needed to take off the necklace. I guess to prove that I cared about him even if I didn’t want to marry him just yet.” 

“You didn’t take the necklace off,” Azriel stated, eyes boring into her even though she couldn’t quite bring herself to look back at him. 

“I couldn’t do it,” Elain’s voice shook slightly as she thought back to that night. “He obviously wasn’t happy with my choice and so he just… he reached forward and pulled it off of me.”

Elain’s eyes were shut, her heart racing at the memory of how she’d felt that night. How alone she’d been, how momentarily afraid. She couldn’t bring herself to tell Azriel that she’d woken to a small, raised scar on the side of her neck the next morning. She hadn’t realised that she’d been crying until Azriel’s hand cupped her face, the rough pad of his thumb gently sweeping across her cheek to brush away hot tears.

“I’m so sorry,” she mumbled.

“What are you apologising for?” Azriel asked. 

She could hear the restraint in his voice, the underlying anger that he carried on her behalf. 

“I don’t know,” Elain finally looked at him, giving him a sad smile. “I’ve just been so awful to you for so long now.” 

“You haven’t,” he assured her. “You have nothing to be sorry for, Lain. I just hope you know that how he acted - pulling this off of you - that’s not okay. You didn’t deserve that.” 

“I shouldn’t have led him on…” she shook her head. “I wasted his time. I wasted yours… he was right to be angry with me.” 

“Look at me,” Azriel demanded, palm sliding from her cheek down to her jaw so that he could tilt her face up towards his. “None of that matters.”

“It does though because I -” 

“Elain, did he ever…” Elain’s eyes travelled to the clench of his jaw, the way his throat flexed as he trailed off. “If he put his hands on you…” 

“No, Az.” Elain lifted her hand up to cover his where it still cradled her face. “There were words occasionally and he’d… when we… never mind,” she blushed, swallowing away the bitterness at remembering what the sex had been like after an argument or whenever he’d been jealous. “It was never… he never hit me.” She said finally.

Elain studied Azriel’s face carefully. Let him see that she was okay. That the only marker that anything had happened was a broken necklace that was easily mended. 

She knew where his mind had gone - knew his fears of her being treated the same way his mother had been treated. 

He’d confided in her years ago - told her about what he’d witnessed growing up and the anger he felt towards the man he didn’t even care to call father. Explained how ashamed he felt at being too small to really be able to do anything to help. 

Elain couldn’t bear the thought of him feeling like that again. Certainly not over her. 

“Azriel,” she squeezed his fingers to get his full attention. “He didn’t hurt me. I promise.” 

“Okay,” he nodded eventually, worried eyes meeting hers for one more moment as if to confirm that she was in fact unharmed before he leaned back and picked up her necklace from where he’d sat it on the bench next to her hip. “Here, just like new.” 

Elain didn’t reach for the necklace, instead she just gave him a shy smile and echoed the question she’d asked him when he first presented her with this necklace all those years ago. “Put it on me?” 

Azriel returned her smile with one just as shy, waiting as she gathered her hair and twisted it up to move it out of the way. His hands slipped around her neck, the chain cold against her skin. 

Azriel’s head dipped so that he could see what he was doing, his cheek skimming her hair as he took his time fastening the necklace. She’d missed the feeling, the reassuarance that the small bit of gold nestled against her chest provided her. 

“Last night… Did you mean what you said?” His question was so quiet, half hushed by the way his face was tilted into her hair. 

“Oh god,” she groaned, dread seeping through her veins. 

She’d been wondering all morning what had happened last night, had been trying to fill in the blanks between the bits she could remember… which wasn’t all that much. She was scared to even ask - afraid to know all the ways she might’ve embarrassed herself the previous night. “I don’t really remember what was said, to be honest.” 

He finally pulled back and straightened up, hands reaching forward to gently maneuver the necklace until it sat just right around her neck. Each brush of his fingers against her skin made her shiver in a way that she couldn’t possibly hide from him. 

The way that he was looking at her certainly didn’t help. Neither did the drag of his thumb against her neck, right over a pulsing vein that gave away her racing heart. 

“Right,” Azriel gave her a nervous smile that made her stomach drop in anticipation. “When Nesta asked you why you said no…”

“I do remember that part,” she cut him off, unable to bear hearing it again although she knew it could only get worse. 

“Well, when it was just us upstairs, after you’d asked me to stay -”

“Jesus, Az, I’m sorry -”

“Not something to apologise for,” the fingers of his other hand tapped out a pattern on her knee that caused yet another shiver to zip up her spine. “I asked you why you stayed with Graysen or with any of the others if you didn’t even actually like them and you told me that it was easier to do that than admit that you, um… wanted me.”

Elain bit the inside of her cheek as she glanced away from him yet again.

“Is that true?” Azriel prodded her for an answer and when she found the courage to look at him again, the look in his eyes, the unmistakable heat, threatened to stop her heart altogether. 

“What happens if I say yes?” She felt breathless, a little dizzy. Just like she felt a year ago when she’d been in a very similar situation - sat on a countertop, Azriel standing in between her knees. Their entire world balancing on a precipice. 

She wasn’t sure when she’d started to lean into his touch. Couldn’t pinpoint when her face had moved so close to his that his nose practically grazed hers. She had no way to tell if he had leaned down or if she had keened upwards, her body arching up to him like a flower seeking the sun. She didn’t know when any of it had happened but she didn’t fight it as her eyes fluttered shut and her lips parted in anticipation. 

Waiting. Wanting.

He didn’t answer her, only smoothed his thumb over her throat once more before repeating his own question. “Is it true, Elain?” 

“Yes,” she breathed, her voice verging on desperation. 

Azriel swallowed once, eyes tracing a slow path from her eyes to her lips before he answered her with action. 

Their lips met, clumsily at first though they fell into rhythm quickly, muscle memory kicking in as their mouths came together in a way that bordered on frantic. Her hands tangled in his hair while his ventured to her waist, pulling her into him while simultaneously pushing her further back onto the workbench until she was practically flat against it, his body pressing hers down.

“Elain…” Azriel’s voice was almost pained as he said her name, his lips coasting along her jaw, a different kind of restraint in his tone than the restraint he’d spoken with a few minutes before.

“Please,” she all but whimpered, desperate to feel his lips on hers again. 

“Can’t do this if you’re going to run again afterwards, Elain.” He told her, his hands still wandering, sliding under the soft fabric of the shirt she wore. His shirt. 

“I mean… my flight is booked for tomorrow,” she couldn’t help but joke, squealing and squirming as his fingers pressed into her side as punishment. 

“S’not funny,” he grumbled. 

“Sorry, sorry…” she schooled her face into a serious expression. “I do have to go tomorrow but it won’t be because of this, Az. Not this time. I promise.”

“We have a lot of talking to do,” Azriel told her, all the while his hands travelled further up her torso until his fingers grazed the soft skin of her breasts. 

Just that slight touch had her tugging him down towards her as she leaned further back once more, presenting herself to him. His for the taking. 

“Later,” she told him. “Talk later.”

She knew it was stupid  - to once again go down this route without having properly spoken about what they were doing. What this was. If it was even anything. All she knew was that she was tired of pretending. Tired of being afraid of the unknowns, of the what ifs. She wished she had any idea how this would all end, how it would play out. But that was a conversation for another day. Right now, all she wanted, all she needed , was this.  

“Later,” Azriel agreed, smiling into the crook of her neck before coming back up to kiss her again. This time it was unrushed, almost lazy. He took his time familiarising himself with her mouth the same way he took his time circling her nipples with his thumbs. She moaned into his mouth - half at the blissful feeling of his hands on her skin, half at the memory of what that same motion had felt like when he’d slid his hand up under her skirt the last time they’d done this. 

“Always want you like this,” she admitted, mind hazy as his mouth travelled down her neck and over her sternum as he pushed up her t-shirt until his lips were on the bare skin of her stomach. 

“Yeah?” his fingers tucked into the waistband of her sweatpants, tugging them down as she lifted her hips to aid in the process. Her underwear was pulled to the side, his fingers gliding over her entirely too easily with how wet she was for him. She heard him swear under his breath, in awe at his effect on her.

“Always,” she reiterated, gasping as he slowly slid a finger inside her. “For you. Always like this for you. Az, please can we just -”

She was speaking complete gibberish, anxious to get what she’d been coveting all this time even if she hadn’t wanted to admit it to herself. She didn’t want to waste any more time.

“Don’t have a condom with me,” he told her with a kiss to the inside of her thigh as he continued to touch her. She was distracted from her disappointment when he added another finger - tested the stretch of her. 

“You don’t have any here?” The lack of a condom hadn’t been an issue last time but it had been a year and she knew Azriel had a rotation of girls that he occasionally saw so when he didn’t follow up with a but I haven’t been with anyone, she didn’t let herself linger on it for too long. 

“Don’t really make it a habit to have sex in my workplace very often, or ever, to be honest. Safety concerns and all…” he trailed off, his breath hot over where she ached for his touch. “So this might just have to do for now, wanna make you co-”

His words were cut off by a shrill ring from somewhere besides them. 

“Ignore it,” she told him, hips tilting up in search of more as she flung a hand out to the side in search of her phone. Her fingers blindly fumbled on the screen until the ringing stopped. 

Azriel continued, fingers curling in just the right way as he circled her clit with his tongue - ever so slowly bringing her closer and closer to the edge. 

“Az, oh my God, I think, I think -” Elain gasped, grasping at his hair. She wanted to tell him she was close, to not stop, that she was going to come. But the shrill ring of her phone sounded again, effectively ruining the moment.

“You should probably get that,” Azriel reluctantly pulled away, fingers slipping out of her. He sighed deeply, forehead resting against her bare thigh as she reached for her phone and glanced at the screen. 

Two missed calls and fourteen unread texts. If it wasn’t for previous trauma of missed calls and texts, she might’ve let it go and urged Azriel to continue. She tapped on the screen a little harder than necessary.

“Hello, Nesta.” Elain huffed as she sat up, gently pushing Azriel away as she adjusted her underwear and pulled her pants up and her shirt back down. 

Azriel grinned, shamelessly watching as Elain made herself decent to speak to her sister while she tried to pretend like she hadn’t been splayed out on his workbench half naked, with his mouth in between her thighs mere moments ago. 

“Where the hell have you been? I’ve been texting you all morning, it’s almost one in the afternoon. I’m glad to know you’re alive.” Nesta rattled off, exasperated. “Azriel wasn’t answering his phone either.” 

“I’m alive. I’m with him. I’ll be home soon.” Elain’s words were short. She couldn’t keep the annoyance out of her voice at having their time so rudely interrupted. 

She knew the moment was over, that she’d need to go back to her sisters and explain herself. God knows they’d be anxiously waiting for answers now that she’d sobered up. But her disappointment faded because the way Azriel was watching her with bright, happy eyes and lips swollen from kissing her more than made up for it. 

She half listened to whatever Nesta was saying, too focused on the man in front of her - his dark, messy hair. His broad shoulders and strong arms. His calloused hands. All those tattoos that snaked up his arms and over his chest - old, familiar ones and a few new pieces that she longed to learn about. His enviably long eyelashes. Those kind emerald flecked eyes.

This was Azriel. Her Azriel. Her best friend. 

How could she have ever thought this was anything but exactly right?

[ashsostrange]

"averagegirlie" is just "xxoxobree", formerly known as "breeandhermunches" on a burner. newsflash, your "fav" miles writer isn't who you think she is!

ik a lot of us must be VERY confused so let me help you out. @/averagegirlie and @/xxoxobree are the same mfkn person! why did bree make this account? i assume that it's so she could fend for herself and keep the "unbothered" act up on her main page. that's why she deletes all her reblogs after arguing w someone then comes over to this account to start bsing. not to mention she can say extremely problematic things with no repercussions, because she doesn't have a following on that page + it's not tied to her.. at least it wasn't before! bree's a very messy liar. i peeped the truth so lemme share it w y'all.

bree if you're seeing this, go take a couple shots before you read. you should've kept it cute but you didn't, so let's get nasty mf.

i have receipts! let's start right here cz i find this the funniest:

nobody but her spells "internet" like that... this is one of the many examples of the two accounts talking alike, even though bree said she wouldn't refer to "yao" as a friend when the whole rashad thing was going down. yesterday, i reminded yao of that. she said "i like bree, so what" but she deleted that and changed it to "when are y'all gonna catch on to the fact that we talk?" mhm.. bree's a lil confused, but next!

y'all see "yao's" tag? telling alexa to play some bs... then y'all see bree?? NEXT!

go look on miss average's page. she only comes online to defend and ride the hell out of bree's dick. remember ts w amani? why are you going so hard for someone who says they dk you like that LMFAO. not to mention, when the rashad shit was happening, bree said "this my girl and she never been wrong" but then she turns around and says "i wouldn't say we're friends" WHICH ONE IS IT MISS MUNCH??! 😭🤣🤣 next!

why we praising tf out of bree's oc? ts was ai bro. we got a self supafan. next...

look at this smart anon, putting tg the pieces and shit. "ash and dalia fight your battles every time" is literally.. a lie. what battles are we referring to? talia's never in drama as much as you're implying. and ima ride for my friends anyway, tf? but my entire blog will never be centered around ONE human being. it ain't that serious ever. "yao" and bree need hobbies cz writing obv ain't doing it for her. next.

bree has also said she's messy lol. she likes drama. hm!

look at how she came on her white horse when bree was battling the great war w anons over miles morales smut (which i don't fw, js to be clear.) who summoned her? BREE LMFAIOFHDGFKJAS... NEXT!!!

here's miss xxoxo munches being ableist, much like her alter ego. bro went silent and blocked lia after this. now let's get into miss average again.

look at this bs. ion even gotta say much.. this girl is black & not chinese!! y'all should know why this is weird. here's the "evidence" she gave me btw:

here's me proving her wrong! she tried! next.

y'all see the way they're tagging their posts w their usernames? mhm.. ik you do.

HMMM....

these are both bree. i don't mean to bring up maye again, but i have to for context. what happened wasn't js "drama"... the things she said to dalia were racist + that post she was lyin' about lia in. she also liked the post.. dead giveaway you silly bitch! 🥱 nd she was also instigating in honey's inbox. i know her typing style and her emoji colors lol. it's common sense atp. it's not hard to tell when an anon is bree. and from what i'm seeing not even maye is fw her.. LMFAISAIDHSAY GIRL YOU'RE DONE! 😭 feel free to go thru their accs, you'll see ts too. she's funny asf for this, i'll give her that and that only. i've never laughed so much in under 24 hours. 💓

in conclusion, bree is messy, bored, insecure, ableist & miserable! she thought nobody would ever find out but here we are today. she fronts not gaf but then switches to this acc to let off some serious steam... as miss freeman once said: "Alexa, play yikes!"

but bless bree 💗 maybe if you change now, you'll still be able to collect your tokens like dalia says.

[storiesofsvu]

CM 17.3

Alright!! 17e3 here we go!!

(I meant to rewatch the first 2 eps before this but didn’t get around to it, so a more in-depth review/more film student analysis is still to come.)

Enjoy this chaos with no context for now! (a lot of it likely isn’t gonna be fully fleshed out cause I have a full thought/reply and try my hardest to type it all out super fast before the show moves on but I have to stop to pay attention OR something else comes up and im just SCRAMBLING)

Absolutely hate there’s no subtitles right away for this but I mean.. I could wait a couple of days til its on Disney I just have no patience.

GOD why is it so fucking dark.

Thank you Emily for not letting luke spill the beans, like, kinda like Rebecca as a person, but can’t trust her as long as her job goes

Okay, em is in the right here, both in the sense of keeping it quiet originally but also making luke keep hush. Cause im sorry but she’s right. It would’ve 1000% drove the team to the brink and split them apart AND made them spiral so deep about what was on the site/other people seeing them/trying to cleanse the web of them (which obvi is impossible). Esp jj of all people? Like I’m not really sure *what* is on there, but jj is the one with KIDS, a full family, she’s still in contact with her parents (at least the mom?) she’s probably likely known in the circle of the boys friends parents? Like that’s SO much damage control to stress over??

Im so fucking excited for prentiss’ wacko neighbour to come back loool

LOOOOLL em’s “oh.. oh no…” reaction. I love this.

Did pen just say “tik tack” instead of tik tok? or was I not listening properly lol

“what are you gonna do?” “put out fires” that is LITERALLY a boss’ job. This being said as a boss.

“I don’t want to say no to your face…” SAME girl… same

GOD Emily is so fucking beautiful

This back and fourth with Garcia and her opinions on tyler is SO annoying. At first she hates him and doesn’t want to even look at him, then they’re flirting, then they’re fucking. Then she’s all twitterpated and wrapped around his finger. Then she AGAIN wants nothing to do with him?? Even though in the last ep she was all high school girlie about working with an “ex”?? I GET that the writers/showrunners are piling the comic relief onto her/the situation but come ON.

“I didn’t call you” “your landlord did” BRUH. COME ON. I don’t care how crazy things are, you ALWAYS double check that! I once saw a dude backing into my driveway with a ladder and immediately went outside to be all “uh..hello?” he immediately pulled out his phone, named my landlord, pointed out what he was there for (damage to the siding of the house, I hadn’t noticed cause I hadn’t left the house and live in the basement) AND offered to call my landlord. ALWAYS BE SUSPICIOUS.

WHY THE FUCK ARE JJ AND LUKE PAIRED UP!!!!????? Jj’s a profiler, she’s obvi gonna be able to get it outta luke, or press him for details, or whatever. If he’s supposed to keep shit quiet why tf are they off together. (or were they specifically asked to be together by voit? Cause that’s just him playing into his bullshit again)

“Emily practising deception isn’t a lie. It’s good leadership” THANK YOU.

Also...to feed all the jemily shippers out there… if this was a fic written by me.. it would be bundled into the AI shit, but there would be pics of Emily and jj hooking up that were very easily proven to be legit and the entire situation would out them and that’s what the actual issue was/is with the site…

I understand jj is outside with Sydney and luke’s job is to keep the girls distracted inside but of COURSE its himbo’s first reaction to pull out the soccer ball INSIDE.

Okay is that just some weird direction/camera angles or are we eluding to the older sister being a cutter?

Emily’s reactions to brian were perfection.

JFC NO! who’s out there stalking them? Uggghh (though I will say that the moment something clinked in the parking garage I said to myself “pls don’t let her get kidnapped in ep 3…”

I KNEW IT WAS CARBON MONOXIDE!! So smrt

Why does it feel like tyler knows more about gold star than the bau does?

Oooo but he cloned the phone! Good boy!!

Penelope: in charge of tracking down tyler

Tyler: texts Penelope “I need to see you”

Penelope: “NO!” doesn’t reply….

Ah yes.. I was right about the cutting… oof. Uugggh talk about heartbreaking..

LOOOOL tara teasing rossi! “I think I pulled… everything…” HHAH

Im not gonna lie, I absolutely HATE that they went down this AI *porn* route, as if these fucking poor characters haven’t been through enough, and like, again as I said, JJ… she’s got the most damage control to do no matter what, and poor girl hasn’t dealt with more than half her trauma so far…

“but I didn’t exactly get it legally, so you know what rebecca’s gonna say” THANK YOU. But also, like fuck that. cause this show has ALWAYS been above the law in that sense. I can’t remember if I said it in last week’s summary or if it was another random post, but CM vs like, SVU is WILD because we NEVER see things past the cuffs being put on/the unsub getting killed/killing themselves. We never go to court, we never see the legal side of it BECAUSE 99% of them would be not guilty due to mental…defect? LOL I know that’s not the right word/phrase but you know what I mean. CM is about the mind of the criminal and chasing them down and finding out the trigger and stressor and figuring out the pattern, not seeing things through to court and prison.

and while I love the addition of her character (Rebecca), it’s making other characters act in ways they never have before/never would simply because now the show is implicating the legal side of things. again, love having Rebecca and that boundary in line for the team but it is messing with the normal dynamics we are used to. Like..as IF Penelope would have any issue using an illegally cloned phone in the past. She was all “don’t ask questions” “well yes I *could* get access to that record, but it is technically sealed” and hotch would be all “I didn’t hear anything…”

LOL Emily with a full bottle of wine at her desk. Love her. god she’s SO annoyed with brian and I love it.

SEE this is why luke never should have said anything. Cause it doesn’t matter how hard you try not to look, you’re never going to be able to resist being able to look it up, no matter how bad it is, how fake and evil and ugly it is, you’re still gonna want to know and jj didn’t need to see that/know about it. How is she supposed to go home and act ok now??

“okay they’re here… somehow” DUDE YOU KNOW BETTER EM! Doesn’t matter that youre in an fbi parking garage, no cop gets there that fast!!

Also..that red coat is TRENCH COAT. YEESSS

Oh FUCK YOU BRIAN

“FUCKING BRIAN!” thankkkkk you em

THAT’S HOW IT ENDS SEERIOUSLY? Ffs.

Also…in all seriousness. Em was in HER office at the BAU, somewhere you (I assume) need clearance to get on property, much less in the building or into the parking, so WHY/HOW the FUCK were both brian, the guys who beat him up and whoever took the pictures get clearance?? SHOULDN’T QUANTICO HAVE SOME PRETTY FUCKING HIGH SECURITY LEVELS???

[ohgodmyeyes]

Hello love, I got someone else hooked to disassembly and we both can’t wait for updates to resume when possible ❤️

hey! i'd been meaning to do this for a couple of days, because you've been so unimaginably kind and patient.

i didn't anticipate ever needing such a long break from a creative project; but then, i've also never poured quite this much of myself into that kind of endeavour before. (*not sure whether i'm talking about disassembly by itself, or my anakin stuff in all its entirety, not that it especially matters in-context.)

anyway, because you trusted me enough to recommend it to someone new after watching it go so long without an update, i feel like i owe it to you to show you what i've written for it over the past couple of days. it's unedited, so there might be typos or notes or continuity problems or (most likely) egregious word repetition; despite that, i hope it measures up conceptually to the rest of the story.

i also hope it reassures anyone who's been in doubt that this fic means more to me than ever, and isn't far from being updated. i've loved working on it again, and i hope a few of the people who engaged with it before will enjoy coming back to it too.

i'm not going to shoot myself in the foot by deigning to offer a timeline, but i will say that there are approximately 700 words worth of SPOILERS for Disassembly behind the cut — including the baby's name!

if you would rather wait until the chapter is completed to read it, DO NOT LOOK BEHIND THE CUT.

for any/everyone else... well, i hope i'm off to a good start. (and for god's sake, pls be gentle if i'm not lol.)

...

...

"Liam. Do you like it?"

"Sure. I mean, I don't not like it. But I thought you said you wanted to pick something to make my dad happy, since Leia already used 'Ben'."

"...I thought I did. Didn't he ever tell you about his mom's old fiancé? They were going to get married; he treated your dad like he was his own kid, but he died before the wedding ever happened."

"...Oh. Right. I— I'm sure he must have mentioned him, at least once or twice."

...

Even now, you had no idea whether Luke had been feigning his familiarity with the name you'd chosen for your son. Maybe Anakin had told him; maybe he hadn't: Both possibilities seemed equally likely to you. All you really knew was that Anakin had disclosed the information to you while you'd been sitting on his couch with him, late one evening back at his old house. You'd been drinking that night, just passing a bottle back-and-forth while you watched the news scroll by together— not that you ever planned on revealing to Luke that particular bit of the story.

All Luke needed to know was the name itself, and the barest explanation as to why you'd picked it.

"I barely remember telling you about that," Anakin murmured from his seat next to your hospital bed, glancing up from the tiny bundle in your arms through a few stray strands of his own hair. His eyes were tired, but he looked happy anyway— happier, even, than you'd seen him since that last time he'd smiled at you in the car, after seeing his cardiologist. That hadn't been so long ago; now, though, it felt like another lifetime.

In more than one way, you supposed it sort of was.

Liam squirmed, prompting you to look down at him, too, but he didn't wake up. It had only been (maybe) an hour since he'd been pulled out of you; you'd placed him on your breast as soon as the nurse managing the ward had locked your bed into position and handed him off to you, but he hadn't suckled for very long before falling into what appeared to be a fairly restful sleep.

You hoped you'd fed him correctly: The next time he did wake up, you thought, you would have to ask someone for help.

"We'd both had a lot to drink that night," you said to Anakin, with as quiet a laugh as you could muster. "I'm actually almost surprised I remember— but something about it must have stuck with me."

Anakin chuckled back, but didn't appear to have anything else to say just then— evidently too wrapped up in the baby to give anything else very much of his attention. You recalled what you'd learned from Luke about how he and Leia had come into the world; by the time their dad had seen them with his own eyes, they were already more than a week old: Having been greeted, fed, changed, held, and dressed for days and days by people who weren't him.

Liam, in contrast, had almost certainly seen more of Anakin's face in his first sixty minutes of life than he had of yours— and it was Anakin who'd held him first, and taken photos of him first, too— not to mention given you the most helpful advice you'd received so far concerning diaper changes.

Fortunately for you, not knowing quite how to feel about any of that made it a lot easier to remember to try not to feel too much of anything about it at all.

"Have you heard anything from Luke yet?" you asked Anakin, not necessarily wanting to hear the answer.

"No, but I wouldn't expect him to call me. You should probably check your phone."

It had probably taken you the better part of an hour to shower and dress following your 'encounter' with Luke in the hallway, you thought; after that, you'd spent perhaps fifteen or twenty minutes in transit in the back of the taxi, and then another hour or so being evaluated before your c-section. Then there had been the operation itself, followed by your time in the recovery room, not to mention the time you and Anakin had already spent fawning over Liam—

"...You're right," you admitted, thinking about the way Luke tended to wake up early when he'd been drinking. "I probably should."

Your phone had been wrapped up in the clothes you'd come in wearing, and placed on the table next to the bed: Maybe by Anakin, or maybe by a nurse; you couldn't know. After gently depositing Liam into the bassinet on the opposite side of the bed (lifting your arms to do so precipitated a distinct stabbing sensation in the muscles close to where you'd been cut open, which you expertly ignored), you untangled it from your leggings and lit up the screen.

"Shit," you said— out loud, without meaning to.

"What?" asked Anakin, seeming almost to come out of a trance.

"...Luke thinks something happened to you. I— well, I think he might be on his way here soon." The prospect of Luke showing up at the hospital (maybe even still half-drunk) shouldn't have filled you with dread, but it did. By some miracle, your brain didn't even chastise you for your lack of enthusiasm; maybe, you thought, even it couldn't blame you.

Anakin paused, as if to think. He'd been doing a lot more of that recently, and so it wasn't difficult (for you, anyway) to remember to wait. It wasn't that his brain 'didn't work', as he seemed to have taken to characterizing it; rather, it was that it didn't work as quickly as he or anyone around him was accustomed to it working.

He was still himself, and he could even still act like it, too— just so long as you gave him enough time.

"...How does he know where we are?" he finally asked, all of a sudden making you regret your own patience, at least that time.

"What?" you asked back, this time intending to buy a few seconds for yourself instead.

"How does Luke know we're here, at the hospital? If he'd called, they would have told us."

Great job. Are you going to tell him about the dog tracker you put in his leg, now?

...No. No, fuck you.

"He must have told the computer at home that I lost my phone," you lied.

"Oh," said Anakin, followed by another long and thoughtful pause. "...Are you sure you're okay with that?"

You laughed, and laughed bitterly; you didn't mean to, exactly, but you also supposed that if anyone was liable to understand, it was almost certainly Anakin. "It doesn't matter whether or not I'm okay with it," you told him, stealing a guilty glance in Liam's direction as it occurred to you that you should probably start trying to be a bit more quiet for his sake.

"I think it matters," said Anakin. "If you don't feel like seeing him right now, then—"

"Then I'll see him anyway," you finished decidedly, looking down to offer a poke to your own still-tingling legs because you didn't want to look up at Anakin just then. Something like a cramp seemed to run through one of them; right up into where you'd been cut open, but it didn't hurt so much as it felt foreign: Enough to bother you, but not in a way that was liable to make you say 'ow'. "If I start treating him differently now, it's only going to make things worse for all of us."

"Before tonight I probably would have said the same thing, but—"

"But nothing. Did you forget what we talked about before— when I was still in the shower?"

Anakin shot you a look. "No. No, I didn't 'forget'— actually, I'm starting to think I remember it better than you do; I'm not the one who's been making excuses for him this whole time."

"I'm not 'making excuses'," you said, all of a sudden too tired to bother to mask the hurt in your voice. "I'm trying to hold all of this together long enough to give Liam the kind of life he deserves. He's only a baby; he can't grow up with Luke and I hating each other."

"He doesn't have to." Anakin looked past you, and over at the little hospital bassinet instead. "...I really wasn't joking when I said I thought you should call someone. If you leave now, Luke will—"

"Luke will dump you in the veteran's home, and none of us will ever see each other again," you hissed, cutting him off as sharply and deliberately as you could without shouting at him. "You say you haven't forgotten, but we've been over this more than once, and—"

"And every single time we do 'go over it', it gets worse! I didn't agree to move in because I thought it was a good idea; I did it to make you happy— because you thought we could keep flying under the radar, and I wanted to trust you. We're not anymore, though, whether we like it or not, and Luke—"

"Luke is going to be a great dad! You might not have been able to give him the tools to be a husband, but I know he's going to be a good father; all you have to do is let him try. Anyway, I need him as much as I need you... especially now," you added, with yet another glance in the direction of Liam's tiny, sleeping form.

"You don't need either of us," said Anakin, shaking his head. "You could do it alone, and I think you probably should."

You winced at his bluntness, not that you hadn't expected it. He'd said the same thing about Leia and her boyfriend, after all: Projecting his own fears around intimacy onto the people he cared about; pretending it was hard-earned wisdom instead. You supposed he could very well have been both 'correct' and 'projecting' at the same time, but...

...

...

...

AND THAT'S IT FOR NOW. i was tired last night and whatever else i wrote after that is still gibberish. back to it tonight, though, i hope. i would be lying if i said i didn't feel anxious and rusty, but it's okay to feel that way once in a while.

anyway... 'Liam' is a deliberate reference to Liam Neeson, because of course 'Qui-Gon' doesn't exactly fit into the AU. I wasn't sure whether it was a good idea to shoehorn a brand-new character into anakin's past for the sole purpose of justifying the name, but at the end of the day, it's not the clumsiest thing i've ever done as a writer (even within this story).

there's a chance i might go back and add a scene to an earlier chapter so that it isn't too jarring to new readers, but part of me also thinks it's fine the way it is. they've had lots of time to talk, frankly, and we were never going to hear all of the conversations, were we...?

anyway, i'm obviously not going to tag the ships or let people reblog this... but if you happen to know of someone who might appreciate it, you're more than welcome to link them. hopefully i'll see you again soon.

thank you, @lilahelynora — and everyone/anyone else who's been in any way patient with me recently (i'd tag a few other special people too, but frankly i don't want to bother them). it all means more than you know.

[ohkaranetsmkor-blog]

The Little Mermaid Ramble w Spoilers Below

Loved loved loved like 8.5/10 loved and I am a picky gal. Got a couple of spoilery thoughts so only read if you have seen the film. There are spoilers to this film even though you basically know what happens so just read this when you’ve seen it ok!!!!

- The opening with the waves was stunning, gorgeous, omg like out of a David Attenborough documentary or something it got me straight in.

- Wanted to see what happened to Ariel’s mum low key... show don’t tell ya know. Same with Eric, I wish we got to see him as a baby or something I just would have liked to have seen IT rather than a monologue.

- In terms of Halle and Jonah’s chemistry I AM SOLD on the romance but just wish they had a couple more scenes together, especially at the end cause they kiss once and then *cut* they married. Even that final shot, I wanted just a little more.

- New songs are great and all the reprises of POYW are heartbreaking oml Halle you really are an Angel/Mermaid with a siren call that voice is impeccable.

- Scuttlebutt was a lot better in context I must admit, but eh I wouldn’t say I love loved it but glad that it fit with the rest of the songs. 

- Wild Uncharted Waters I like as a song but was I the only one who felt Jonah was overacting just a *tadddd*. Like dude was hunched over and running up and down WHICH IS FINE before you haters come for me, but it just sometimes felt a bit overdone and didn’t match with the lip syncing. Speaking of lip syncing, couple times where Jonah was so obviously lip syncing and it just didn’t fit. But ehh it’s minor so I’ll let it pass.

- The whole scene when Ariel first sees Prince Eric and finds out how similar they are/facing the same problems. To me it just showed how much they’re meant to be together. The whole shipwreck scene in general was AMAZING, probably my favourite moment of the film. The part that sold me was when Ariel helped Max get on the lifeboat what a perfect addition and just shows how loving Ariel’s heart is.

- I really loved the plot change that Ursula put a spell on Ariel so she wouldn’t remember the three days to get a kiss requirement. Thought it was super inventive and made for some great scenes where Ariel and Eric could just be together without Ariel being burdened with trying to kiss him. It meant their scenes and the chemistry felt so organic and less forced. 

- The whole Kiss the Girl sequence and Eric finding out Ariel’s name was soo cute ahhhhh. It was perfect!!! Not to mention their library meet cute that whole scene was adorable. Give these two a sequel for the love of god pls so I can see them together again!!!

- And Grimsby you Cupid matchmaker I see what you doin kicking that ring away and I fully support it

- Jodi Benson’s little cameo on the beach was perfect. So so sooo cute

- Ik I’m going back and forth but I loved Ariel’s interactions with her older sisters. They actually felt like older sisters because of it and Ariel is totally the youngest its giving youngest sib in the family.

- The best change they made was Ariel saving the day though. It honestly makes no sense in the original that Eric kills Ursula. Having Ariel do it was so much more gratifying cause you see all she’s learned from watching Eric and being on land. Ya Princess Ariel is a SMART CAPABLE BOSS of a Princess in the best way and I’m here for it. Not a Mary Sue, just some good writing okk

- Eric coming back to shore and letting Ariel’s blue dress go was all the feels. Wish it was just a bit longer rather than a cut to black, just felt a bit off or as if it needed a scene where the two can visually see how separate their worlds are. Kinda wish there were more moments were Eric saw Ariel as a mermaid, it just would have driven that longing and theme of a forbidden romance a bit harder.

- But... Max coming back with Ariel *chefs kiss*. So romantic and so cute. Again wish it was longer so FANFICTION WRITERS I NEED YALL TO SAVE ME WITH SOME FLUFF OK???

- The send off with Triton and all the mermaids coming ashore was so touching, a perfect ending. I just wish the final shot was a little better done, perhaps a shot of Ariel and Eric’s faces sailing into the sunset of a new adventure rather than a wide shot of them rolling on the waves. Don’t get me wrong it was fine, nothing bad, just wish it was a lil different you know.

- My final note is not a note on the film but more so a theory... since they never showed us how Ariel’s mum passed away but HEAVILY implied it had something to do with humans, is it in the slightest bit possible Ariel’s mum saved Eric from a shipwreck when he was a baby? Like how does a helpless orphaned baby survive a shipwreck without someone saving him? Idk, I could be going down a desperate rabbit whole here but maybe sequel in the future? I’d be down... but for now imma say this for the billionth time I BEG AND PRAY FOR FANFICTION PLS.

[thephantomchronicles]

“i know this hurts, but you have to stay awake.”

“don’t close your eyes, please don’t close your eyes!”

with willexxxxxxxx pls and thanks :))

ao3 link here

“I know, I know this hurts, but you have to stay awake,” Alex pleaded with him. “Okay? Don’t close your eyes, please don’t close your eyes!”

Alex woke up with a gasp as he shifted on the bed. He fell back against his pillow, squeezing his eyes shut once again and breathing out. He wasn’t even sure whom he’d been calling out for in the dream. With everything that’d been going on lately it could literally be anyone because all Alex could feel was worry and uneasiness.

And it was over, they were okay, they were safe once more, but this time it’d just been… He didn’t know if he could describe it. He didn’t really like thinking about it to be honest. Julie was gone, but now she was back. And Alex would love to carry on with his life uninterrupted, but there were so many loose ends left and so many talks he felt like he should have with a lot of people and he just…

How much longer would they keep getting away with it?

Maybe he was just being paranoid. Maybe he was just extra worried because now he had a kid to care for too. And he had to do everything in his power to protect him. But by the Angel, all he felt right now was fear. For Matt and everyone else. For the next big thing that happened to them.

He reached for his phone on the nightstand, only to find out it was 1 am. Still early for his usual schedule, but he didn’t have to go on patrol tonight which was supposed to mean he could actually catch up on some sleep, but that didn’t really seem to work out for him well.

The other side of the bed was empty which wasn’t alarming since Willie was just supposed to get off work at around this time, but Alex didn’t really think he could just go back to bed right now while his head had started buzzing. 

He sighed, leaving his phone back on the nightstand and sat up, a hand going over his face. He figured he could just spend the rest of his time until Willie got back, pacing around in the living room or something, when he suddenly heard quiet voices coming from inside.

He frowned, getting up to go check out what was going on. The lights were dimmed, but there was definitely a conversation happening and Alex was actually surprised to find Willie and Matt on the couch even though they were the only other two residents of this apartment.

“Hey,” Willie said, noticing him first. Alex wasn’t sure if he’d actually heard him waking up, but he also had many other questions here. “Did we wake you up?”

“No,” Alex said, coming closer. “But I thought you were at work. And I’m pretty sure I left you in your bed hours ago,” he added to Matt as he sat down on his other side.

“Willie came home,” Matt said as if that explained everything.

“Yeah, I finished with my shift a bit earlier,” Willie said.

“And… is everything okay?” Alex asked, glancing up at Willie. They were past the point where Matt woke up every night in tears, but still, not every night was a quiet one and they were doing their best to deal with every situation thrown at them.

“Willie was telling me about werewolves,” Matt said. And Alex fully believed that this all made sense in Matt’s head, but he was pretty sure he was missing the context to actually be able to follow.

“Right,” Alex said with a nod. “And what prompted the sudden werewolf curiosity at 1 am?”

Matt seemed kind of reluctant to answer, staring at his hand on the couch. Was Alex still disoriented from sleep or was he really out of the loop tonight?

“Well, you’re not the only one with cool lore to share,” Willie jumped in with a smile when he didn’t answer. “And Matt’s mom was a werewolf too.”

“Oh,” Alex realized belatedly what was going on. He still wasn’t sure why it was happening at 1 am, but he wasn’t going to really question it either way. “That makes sense.”

“You’re not mad?” Matt looked up at him.

“Wha- Why would I be mad?” Alex asked, confused.

“Because I’m a Shadowhunter,” he said.

And finally it clicked in Alex’s sleep deprived head what was this all about. “Oh, Matt, of course I’m not mad,” he said. “It’s not bad wanting to know more about your parents. And the Shadow World.”

“Sarah didn’t like talking about werewolves,” he said.

Well Sarah was a prejudiced Shadowhunter who didn’t even tell you goodbye when you moved to LA, Alex wanted to say. He didn’t.

“Well, that doesn’t sound right. How else are you supposed to learn about werewolves if no one talks to you about them?” Alex said.

“Willie knows a lot of things,” Matt said.

“Thanks, I find being a werewolf has increased my werewolf knowledge,” Willie said, making him giggle. “And we can definitely talk more about it in the morning because it’s incredibly late right now and we should all be asleep.”

“Yeah, okay,” Matt said with a yawn. “I want a story,” he added.

“Go lay down and I’ll be there in five minutes, okay?” Willie said.

“Okay,” Matt said, getting up from the couch. “Good night.”

“Good night,” Alex called out, watching him walk back towards his room. “Okay, I woke up for an entirely different reason, but what was that?”

“I guess he must have woken up around the same time I came back,” Willie said. “He’d probably come looking for you if I wasn’t here.”

“He wouldn’t ask me about werewolves because apparently he thought I’d be mad,” he said.

“It’s not your fault,” Willie said. “He didn’t exactly have the best role models before coming here. We’re trying to fix that.”

“I’d say you’re doing a pretty good job,” Alex said.

“I’d say we both are,” Willie corrected him. “Why were you awake though?”

“I don’t know.” Alex gave a shrug. “Residual anxiety that everyone I know and love is going to die and I won’t be able to do anything about it, especially now that we have a kid to protect too. You know, the usual.”

“I’d say we’ve been doing pretty good till now,” Willie said. “He’s alive, safe and happy.”

“I know, but what about tomorrow?” Alex asked.

“Tomorrow Reggie and Kayla are bringing Han over. The worst thing that can happen is he bites you,” Willie said.

“By the Angel, I hate that dog…” Alex sighed, making Willie laugh.

“No, but seriously,” Willie sobered up. “You went through a lot with Julie and everything that followed… It’s only been a few weeks, nobody’s expecting you to magically be okay with everything.”

“I know…” Alex trailed off. “I just… It was unbearable. And the thought of doing it again…”

“Alex, you don’t have to-”

“I don’t have to go there, I know,” he said. “And we have many good things to look forward to. But it’s the middle of the night and that’s the best time for your fears to come knocking.” He fell into Willie’s side with a sigh of relief this time, glad to at least be close to him now. It wasn’t enough to make the nightmares disappear, but it made things quieter.

“You wanna talk about it?” Willie asked, his arm wrapping around Alex, bringing him closer.

“Not right now,” Alex mumbled. “We’re both tired. And you promised someone a story before bed,” he added, regrettably pushing himself back again. “But I’m still glad you’re here.”

Willie smiled, leaning in to kiss him softly. “I love you so much,” he said. “And I know it’s hard to block the bad parts out, but I promise there are a lot of good things coming. I heard something about a wedding?”

Alex chuckled. “Yeah, I heard that too.” There were good things coming. Maybe he could focus on them. “Come on, don’t leave the kid waiting.”

“You should go to bed too,” Willie said.

Alex snorted. “You’ll come read me a bedtime story too?”

“You doubt my skills?” Willie asked with a raised eyebrow.

“Never,” Alex said, before pecking his lips once again. There really was something about Willie that just put people at ease. Alex didn’t know if he could really explain it, but it was reassuring. A constant in his unstable life. And he really could use that right now.

There was more to discuss, Alex knew, but going back to bed that night… It didn’t feel like his world was ending anymore. Not when he had Willie by his side.

[delusionalisted]

hello! I'm P.P and i’m here for a tarot reading from u! could i pls know how S.B feels about me now that i confessed my feelings to her? for some context we met around 9-10 months ago and became good friends! we continued to get closer and i started seeing some romantic potential in our connection. unfortunately she left for another country last month, so i made plans with her and told her the day before she left of my feelings. i had gotten some readings prior as to if she felt the same for me and got a yes. though when i did confess she said she saw me as a friend and we are still friends. i do have an idea as to why she may have had that reaction but i would like to see what the cards say. i'm devastated that i won't see her again for a while 😭 its likely i'll see her again maybe next year but i worry i have damaged the friendship as she hasn’t really contacted me much since leaving.. ty once again 🫶

Good evening P. thank you for entrusting me to read for you today. I laid a Celtic Cross spread for you, let’s read it together.

S.B. current state of mind is certainly conflicted. On one hand she’s looking at her joyful past with you, yet feeling trapped and anxious out of fear of ruining your connection; on the other hand, she’s nurturing and filled with sweet emotions like the Queen of Cups and curious like the The High Priestess. She’s wondering about what would happen if she decided to date you or at least get you know on those terms, but she doesn’t feel ready to take on that risk.

What I’m sensing from the reading is that she has troubles committing to something this big, with the 8 of cups as the main issue, it feels like she’s avoiding settling for something uncertain and is looking for something better* elsewhere.

Better as in: date for the purpose of dating, instead of a friendship developing into a relationship. Or that could also indicate that she’s looking for something that *others* would find best suited for her.

With the Judgment card, the Temperance and the 4 of Pentacles what is being asked from you is to be patient and wait for the awakening of something great, new and exciting that is coming your way. Both these major arcanas are passing on the message to keep heart and focus your energies in what you deem necessary, fulfilling and worthy of your time. Is it S.B.? Then allow her to hear her call to action, all in divine timing.

What follows in the “Outcome” is the 3 of cups, a day of celebration with friends, filled with joy, food, laughter and so on. But be mindful of any rush moves. I know you’d like to receive a prompt response to your confession, or maybe a sign from the divine that all will be well, but don’t rush things out, slow progress and a disciplined approach is required to reach the Queen of Cups status. So as for now, sit patiently and wait for the trumpets of Judgment’s sound.

💓

[ofpearlsandstars]

hello! I'm P.P! could i pls know how S.B feels about me now that i confessed my feelings to her? for some context we met around 9-10 months ago and became good friends! we continued to get closer and i started seeing some romantic potential in our connection. unfortunately she left for another country this week, so i made plans with her and told her the day before she left of my feelings. i had gotten some readings prior as to if she felt the same for me and got a yes. though when i did confess she said she saw me as a friend and we are still friends. i do have an idea as to why she may have had that reaction but i would like to see what the cards say. anyways i'm devastated that i won't see her again for a while😭 its likely i’ll see her again maybe next year but i worry i have damaged the friendship. ty once again 🫶

Hey there, sweet bean! ✨

I’m so sorry to hear that things didn’t work out before she left. 😭 It’s so tough when distance comes between relationships. As someone that has been in many LDR’s, it’s not easy being in one, let alone starting your first few months in these conditions. 🥺 Let me look into your question for you!

Since you were the first person to send in an ask in celebration for starting this new blog, I decided to pull a few extra cards to get more details for you. ☺️💙 I must say a disclaimer though to please take all readings with a grain of salt. Ultimately I am not S.B., so I cannot speak for her, but I will relay what I saw + feel.

I know this might be a bit hard to take in, but based on this reading, it appears that the main reasons S.B. did not return your feelings was due to both practicality and not feeling enough romantic potential to pursue something more together. She gives me the air of someone who is very focused on her studies and career - not wanting to jeopardize it for a relationship, and especially not for one that will be short-term or have less chances of lasting because of the distance. My spirits are telling me that since you have known S.B., she was always mentally preparing herself for the move by blocking herself off from feeling significant attachment to any particular person, place or sentiment as much as she could since she knew when she’d be leaving it all behind soon. She seems very grounded, driven and pragmatic when it comes to what she feels she needs in her life, and I sense that at this time, a relationship in general would ultimately feel like a “distraction” from her long-term goals and would be too “emotionally messy” to get involved with for now. In terms of romantic feelings, I am not sensing she had felt this way about you prior to your confession (and now), but I do believe she does view you as a good friend, which is still a huge win, as she seems like such a stellar person! If you can continue to show up for her with unconditional platonic support (and without the intention of getting into a relationship with her in the future - because I do feel she doesn’t take well to those disingenuous intentions), there is still a possibility of patching up this friendship and going back to the way things were before, which I do sincerely wish for you! 🥺 Remain honest and true, and it will surely be a fulfilling friendship for the two of you. 💖

I know this might not have been the reading you wanted to hear, but I hope it resonated and was able to give some additional perspective to your situation. If you enjoyed or appreciated the reading, please feel free to provide feedback (you can send an ask or tag me!) and/or tip me in my Ko-fi linked below.

Wishing you all the best on your journey towards healing and finding the love you truly desire!~ 🐚 💘💫

Mira 🌊🌟

Free Readings are CLOSED!

Detailed Paid Readings are OPEN on Ko-fi!~

I would be deeply honored to serve as your trusted guide through the intricate currents of love, life, career, spirituality, and any other questions that seek profound clarity and insight, delivered with the utmost compassion. I look forward to sharing the celestial sea’s wisdom to assist you in navigating your own ship’s journey with confidence and purpose. 💙

[honeystwiggypeach]

Scenario where their kids/kid are daddy’s boy/girl and they want to do absolutely everything with him leaving them on the side all the time with toji, nanami, gojo, geto and sukuna

If you haven’t done this ❤️❤️

Ok!! I wasn’t too sure how to interpret this request and it seemed simple at first and idk if I over thought it or what happened but suddenly I began to question if it was asking for male dad!reader but I got someone to look at it with me and we decided that’s probably not what it meant but if it is pls let me know because I also love that idea!! Tysm for requesting pls let me know if you want more!!!

Tw- I did do fem reader because that’s just what I did a similar request with last time! Cursing, use of the word daddy to refer to a parent(pls don’t make it sexual that’s weird in this context)let me know if I’ve missed anything!!

Toji

When you first met Megumi, it was after he had toddled into the living room tiny blanket dragging behind him. It was pretty late Toji had slipped off to the bathroom after pausing the movie, Megumi stares at you, the light of the tv screen reflecting off your face, his eyes are wide, shocked even. No one’s ever been in the house except him and his daddy…maybe that’s why he takes off running down the hall the little littering of his feet drowned out by him screaming his head off.

“Megumi” Toji stands in the hall and Megumi reaches up, “what’re you cryin for” he asks walking into the living room with Megumi on his hip.

All he does is try to climb higher on his dads arms when his dad sits beside you. Once he realizes that, you’re definitely ok to be in the house with and that his dad invited you in, he calms a bit though he’s still pouty because you’re watching his favorite movie with HIS dad!

When Megumi gets a little sleepier again, Toji stands to put him back in his room and you both hear the little ‘mine’ that comes from Megumi as he clutches a fistful of Toji’s shirt with one hand and his blanket with the other.

Nanami

Yuji was definitely alarmed when he met you, first of all Nanami’s told him they were going to a cafe to meet a very special person today so he had to be on his best behavior but his dad knew he could do it because Yuji was always good!

But when they both got to the cafe it was just you? You’re the barista Yuji sees everyday before his daddy drops him off at daycare…but now your his dad’s girlfriend? Whatever that means Yuji thinks.

Yuji hasn’t ever really spoken to you, so you offer to bring him and Nanami to a children’s museum in hopes that will make the two of you interact a bit more. Alas that’s not what happens…it isn’t until Nanami excuses himself to the bathroom and convinces Yuuji that he should stay by you that you interact.

And it’s all because Yuji tiredly reaches up asking for you to hold him, you comply and before Nanami can come back from the restroom he’s fallen asleep on your shoulder.

Gojo

Honestly what did you expect? He coddles them and showers them in so much affection it’s insane😭he just never stops giving them attention.

Honestly you asked your daughters if they could help you bake, mind you they live baking! They told you no because Satoru had said he wasn’t going in the kitchen right then.

Geto

It’s led by Nanako having a general weariness of you at first which led Mimiko to form the assumption that she should be cautious around you…but also because naturally Mimiko was quite reserved until she’d gotten to know the individual quite well, which jusg continued to trigger chain reactions.

And while Geto of course lived to hang out with his daughters it saddened him quite a bit to see them not have an interest in the world about you.

That is until you don’t show up for around a week per Geto’s request because he figured you’d been making the girls uncomfortable and he was going to prioritize them over you, they’re his kids.

When he ticks them both in kissing their little foreheads, Nanako shoots straight up in bed almost startling him.

“When’s Ms. Y/n gonna come back?” She asks her voice is quiet she’s a little unsure which is odd for her, she was normally quite confident.

“I thought you guys didn’t like her” his voice is quiet as well.

“Is she gonna be back?” Comes Mimiko’s tony voice as well chiming in.

“I’m sure she’ll be back tomorrow she was just busy this week that’s all” he smiles to himself as he shuts the door, maybe they just needed their own time to process the new changes.

Sakuna

It’s kind of funny to imagine him as a single dad to this little toddler obsessed with fairies and princesses and she immediately thinks you’re a fairy when she sees you😭

All I can imagine is Sakuna who’s only weak spot is this precious baby and she doesn’t have a clue in the world about any of the things that are happening. And Sakuna would rather watch the world burn daughter on his hip before admitting that he’s got a soft spot for her.

Of course it becomes blaringly obvious to you that he definitely values his kid when he seeks you out shows up on your front door and is decent to you…as in he’s not an asshole, originally he did this under the guise of wanting to keep his kid tolerable.

Guys pls request soft Sakuna stuff(maybe we don’t do any jjk lore or anything it’s kinda like modern single dad!sakuna…because omg I want to write a part two😭

Tags~ @nash-bears-blog

[spacexseven]

omg i REMEMBER that line from when I read the day I picked up dazai! very good LN I liked it a lot. maybe that line made me subconsciously start thinking about eelzai lol.

I've been meaning to bug u more about yanderes As Is My Brand but I have SO MANY ideas banging around in my cavernous skull that I end up not being able to pick one and just rambling like a lunatic in my notes app. I will share a little bit about sea monster dazai since he was brought up, though: I've been considering two big things. 1) I remember a while ago reading that there is a belief that a mermaids kiss can allow you to breathe underwater, if dazai happens to learn about THAT little tidbit of information you KNOW hes gonna run away with it! or, swim away with it, rather. he has to test this new theory right away! come on, get in! he has ZERO ulterior motives for insisting you let him kiss you its JUST an experiment come on please? Please? or if we're going with the storyline where ur mad at him for such a frivolous reason as he attacked and tried to eat you (it was only gonna be a BITE! see, not so bad! its was all a misunderstanding pls come back...) it could be a little stunt on his end to get you to trust him again, etc. hed be a bit frustrated if the effect was only temporary, as this puts a wrench in his plan to take you down to his cave and keep you there forever, but the silver lining is now he can demand kisses from you every few hours and have an excuse as to why. 2) in most depictions of sea monsters I've seen, even ones that are mostly humanoid, theyre rather large! like, almost completely dwarfing pirate ships level large! can probably pick a human up with one hand large! there's even a scene in the little mermaid where Ursula gets that big, so do you think dazai would be able to do that? maybe he sticks to a manageable- but still rather Long thanks to the tail- size usually out of laziness and a desire to stick near the shallow shores (cuz he likes the food better, not cuz thats where his little darling lives. just a coincidence.) where there's less room for him to get to his full size. but once he's in the open ocean? ohhh boy.... maybe try to avoid going put too far on any boats, darling, lest dazai decides to start showing off.

- 🩹

finally answering this oh my god i am so sorry again for the delay 100/10 would read ur notes app rambles you have so much fun thoughts it's insane

cw: yandere character, obsessive behavior, non-con kissing, descriptions of sea monster! dazai (including him being unnaturally large, eel-like body, sharp teeth, etc), manipualtive behavior

please don't proceed if any of the warnings make you uncomfortable!!

i do hc eelzai (cute name btw) as being Huge. he can sort of 'elongate' his body when he needs it, but usually sticks to a length of around 10 feet. thing is, when he's underwater and darling is on the surface, they can't tell how big he actually is. relative to regular people, dazai does have larger hands, but it isn't to an alarming extent. it's pretty normal for something not-human to be bigger than an ordinary human, after all. i'd think it's easier to navigate this way, 'cos dragging around a long body isn't the most efficient way of getting around. there's no doubt in my mind he can definitely go bigger. pirate ship big? possibly, but he hasn't really tried to see how much he can grow. it's too much trouble, too easy for some pesky human to spot him. if darling wanted to see, though, he would entertain them without a thought.

THE KISS THING that's so cute actually but not so much in this context. eelzai hears about this from chuuya (aka the most reliable source of information in the seas) and immediately decides it is the perfect solution for all his problems. now he has an excuse to kiss darling all the time, and can keep them with him underwater where their annoying human companions won't bother them. in the 'darling is mad because dazai is insane and tries to attack them' timeline, dazai lures darling in with the promise of breathing underwater despite not knowing if the kiss theory holds any water. what if mermaids were referring to sirens, like chuuya, and not monsters like him? of course he doesn't tell darling this, opting to just lie through his teeth about how they can finally see all the pretty things under the sea up close. what did they mean, asking if he was telling the truth? does he look like a liar? would he risk darling's safety over a rumour? he's almost offended by their lack of trust in him.

fortunately for him, it does work. unfortunately for darling, it has a pretty short duration period. this means if they want to stay longer, they have to kiss him more. dazai thinks it's an amazing deal, of course. but if this happens to a darling who isn't very well acquainted with dazai yet, it's just terrifying to be dragged underwater and sloppily kissed and later dragged down deep by a large monster with too-sharp teeth and a dangerous look in his eyes.

[weirdsht]

Paperback - Cale x Reader

a/n: this is pretty trash forgive me. i'm just trying to function like a normal human again after elections

Warnings: probably ooc Cale, smudge of angst

English isn’t my first language so there will be grammatical errors

Pls don't repost my work anywhere without my permission

If there's something missing in the warnings let me know so I can add it

Any form of interaction toward the post is appreciated <333

Hardbound (pt. 2)

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Caressing the spine of a book, you slowly take it out, not paying attention to the redhead sitting inside your room right now. Cale knows you hear him, he knows you see him in the corner of your eyes. Yet you choose to ignore him as if a ghost was whispering in the wind.

“You know better than anyone that I’ll be fine, so why did you do that?”

Despite your obvious reluctance to acknowledge him and his words, the commander still insists on talking to you. 

Finally, after minutes of trying you spared him a short glance. It may not have lasted a second but it’s enough to let Cale know that you’re now ready to talk things over. You’ll finally say the reasons for your actions that the poor man has been mulling over for a couple of days now.

As you opened the book in your hands, you finally sat on the opposite side of the couch he was sitting on. Your gaze is more focused on the bookmark delicately placed on the page you opened on than the man in front of you.

“I know you’re fine, I know you wouldn’t do anything that would cause you too much harm. I know that best. I drilled it in my head. All the things you’ll say, your thoughts, your plans, your next moves. I can probably cite it word for word.”

Cale can’t see anything on the open book you are holding in front of him. Even though the book was wide open for him all he could see were blank pages and the pretty bookmark made with the dried-up flowers from the first bouquet he gifted you.

It may look like that to him, but he knows what you see is different. From your perspective, the book is filled with words. Words you were so familiar with, words you have been reading over and over again even before you were brought into this world. 

“But at the same time, I’ve read it from your point of view. And if there’s one thing I learned from reading this very long book was that you’re the worst self-critic I have ever met.”

The redhead swallowed the arguments bubbling from his throat and waited for you to speak again.

“You don’t get just how worried people are for you because they don’t know the context. You simply don’t get all the love they hold for you. I get it, as your reader I get why you’re like that. I get that you ensure that you’ll be fine with your every action. I know too well how smart and cunning you are.”

You close the book and hand it over to Cale. ‘Lout of the Count’s Family’ were the words written in Korean the transmigrator could read clearly. Even though the rest of the book was just a bunch of blank pages to him and everyone else, he could still read the title cover and the back synopsis.

“Yet you don’t regard yourself as high as you should. You think that as long as you’re breathing everything should be fine. Despite knowing that the world has brought you up that way it doesn’t make it hurt less you know. Knowing things in advance only litters me with more anxiety. Knowing that I can’t do anything to change your mind once it has been set has me looking for alternatives.”

Your most precious book that Cale is currently holding used to be your favourite book back when you were on Earth. It’s also the only belonging you had brought when you were placed in this new world. The book is still your favorite of course, but now a little anxiety always washes over you whenever you see it.

“Don’t get me wrong, I fully appreciate all the efforts you have done for me, for us. I also now understand a bit where you are coming from. Still, I can’t just excuse how you deliberately got hurt by White Star and his army. You sustained a graver injury than what I would have if ever.”

None of you know how to go from here. Both parties have already said the things bothering them.

A deafening silence can be heard. The book in the middle resting on top of the coffee table bears witness to all of this.

“I… I’m sorry”

“I apologize too. I’ll try to make more rational decisions from now on.”

You know to yourself that even though he said that, everything would probably still go according to what you’ve read. That’s just how Cale is, and as much as it hurts you, you can’t do anything about it.

“I’ll be going first, Alberu must be waiting for me.”

Cale stood up and left the room first. You merely watched as he disappeared from the room, not forgetting to close the door behind him.

Opening the book again, you started reading. You must check once more the contents of the future as you plan on how to help everyone. Lessen the casualties, and lessen the pain and burden Cale is carrying on his back. That’s something you promised yourself that you must do.

Even if it costs you your everything.

[calxide]

⋆⁺ [ 024 ] we need context

warning/s: if there's any pls lmk! not proofread | w/c: 0.6k

Scaramouche sighed as he remembered their conversation earlier. What was I thinking? If only I had faked the confession, my plan should have been accomplished sooner. He sighed at the numerous thoughts that flooded his mind.

"What has the mighty Scaramouche been thinking?" A voice suddenly spoke behind his back. He could feel the warm air that brushed the tip of his ear. The owner of the voice intentionally copied the words he said to them that day.

the rest is below the cut!

He sneered, "Took you long enough to come. I thought you already went back to your dorm."

Y/N chuckled at his words. "Oh, please. I would not ditch you, don't you worry. Besides, I'd like to finish this today." She placed her things on the table. Scaramouche watched her closely; her face was calm, and she was certainly good at hiding her feelings.

"Stop staring at me, jeez," Y/N complained jokingly, which received a snicker from Scaramouche.

They worked on the project just like they did for the past few days. Y/N noticed that Scaramouche was quieter than usual, but she chose not to speak about it. Maybe the male was likely thinking about something; that's why he appeared so occupied. It's probably something of importance, she assumed.

Y/N stretched in her seat as they made final adjustments to their project; she smiled as she thought about how a warm bath would feel after. Once again, she noticed how Scaramouche was pacing out more than usual.

She took this opportunity to ask and cleared her throat, "Is there something you'd like to say?" she gave him a small smile, "Come on now. We just finished our project! Let's treat ourselves with something good."

Scaramouche was taken aback, "Oh, right."

"Well?"

It's now or never.

He sighed and gathered all his strength. He closed his eyes and opened them slowly, "I... Thank you for working with me on this project. I appreciate your hard work. I hope you don't overwork yourself after this. And lastly..." he took a deep breathe, "...I like you, Y/N."

Y/N tilted her head in confusion. "Sorry would you mind repeating that?"

"I said, I like you..!" Y/N suddenly burst into laughter, not believing the boy one bit. "Y-You can't be serious! Haha!"

Scaramouche bit his lower lip in embarrassment, "You suck."

"Oh, dear," Y/N wiped her non-existent tears of joy, "I'm sorry for reacting that way. It's not like I'm rejecting you or anything. But I think that we're going too fast, aren't we? I truly do appreciate the things you've done for me before- and oh, I'm rambling again."

"Well... I do like you too." Y/N gave him a soft, geniune smile. It made Scaramouche's heart flutter momentarily, but it soon was the reason for his heart to ache. Is he ready to break her heart? He wasn't sure.

His heart ached, his head hurt, and nothing was making sense to him anymore. He was supposed to use her for his plan, but why was his heart aching so bad? It pained him, even though this was his plan in the first place.

He forced himself to smile and tried to make it as genuine as he could, "That... was unexpected. But uhm, thank you?"

Y/N lightly chuckled, "Thank you? You're funny, aren't you?"

Scaramouche ignored her comment and decided to push his plan further, "...I'm willing to wait for you."

"That won't be too long, yes? It's not that hard to fall for you- Well, after all, you technically did trip me, and I fell," she giggled, "Don't worry, I won't make you wait for a long time."

They both smiled at each other, the other not knowing that it was a mere act that he had put up. This was certainly not going to end well.

ABYSSAL LOVE ✰ previous ♡ masterlist ♡ next

a/n: hi 🌚 the pace of this story will be faster for the next chapters, so please expect more written parts 🙇‍♀️

⋆⁺ synopsis — Scaramouche, the person who tripped you on purpose just to see your despair expression on your face, hates how you always appear so happy in front of other people. He hated the fact that you find life enjoyable, unlike him. You, of course, hated him back. You don't understand why he goes to the extent to see your face crinkle in pure dismay. But what if you realize that the person who always laughs at your misery isn't so insufferable after you get to know him?

💌 @r-0-tt-3-n-m-1-lk @kanaqwqbear @berryqueue @nejibot @wrrapedroundmyfingerlikearing @cafescara @ferumie @zannivrs @kazuhasmaid @gunz-nrozes

[rattyoakenbitch]

❝𝐩𝐫𝐞𝐭𝐭𝐲❞ ─ 𝐜𝐨𝐫𝐩𝐬𝐞 𝐡𝐮𝐬𝐛𝐚𝐧𝐝

but when he loves me i feel like i'm floating

when he calls me pretty i feel like somebody

❥ content ; little gn reader, sfw agere, corpse is a cg, mostly fluff with a smidge of angst

❥ warnings ; daddy issues, childhood trauma, hints of emotional & verbal abuse and of course age regression if ur uncomfy w that stuff. also pet names and the use of the word "daddy" but not in a sexual/smutty context!!! agere is not a kink!!!

❥ synopsis ; you age regress to cope and corpse takes care of you through it all

❥ a/n ; i got a request to write this agere fic a couple months ago on my wattpad! i myself used to be a part of the agere community but it has been years so i forgot a lot of what i learned. however, unlike age play and cgl, agere is just a coping mechanism and totally nonsexual!! pls do ur research before u attack members of the agere community (: ur coping mechanisms are valid!!!

With a frustrated groan, you push yourself away from your desk, now spinning slowly on your little office type chair.

You had procrastinated and hadn't done any of your work, and even when you did try to finish it, you were easily distracted or discouraged by intrustive thoughts.

Your mind would never fail to drift back to memories of when you were younger. However, those memories weren't exactly fond or anything you'd even want to remember.

Yet they were there, either popping up unexpectedly or lingering in the back of your unconcious mind.

You were snapped out of your thoughts when you felt two strong arms wrap around you, causing you to nearly jump out of your seat.

Corpse hummed. "Are you done with your work yet, darling?"

"Can't finish it.. My brain doesn't wanna co-operate with me today, or ever," you whine, feeling angry tears begin to form behind your waterline.

Corpse sensed the anxiety and frustration in your voice and immediately knew the cause.

"You're not a failure, Y/N. Your father was wrong, and you know it."

"Yeah, but hearing his words in my head don't exactly help when I'm trying to work."

"I know, baby, I know," Still not letting you free from his embrace, Corpse held your significantly smaller hands in his. "But he's not here. It's just me, doll. You're safe."

He knew what he was doing. And he knew that you knew.

You pulled away from his hold, now standing up to face him. He as well stood up to his full height, looking down at you with soft, comforting eyes.

"A-Are you sure I can..?" You ask timidly, looking down at the floor to avoid his gaze. He nods encouragingly.

"Of course, doll. I'll take care of you."

He brings his hand to caress your face and tilts it upwards so your eyes met.

Your eyes dart across the room, looking anywhere but into Corpse's own eyes.

"Tsk, eyes on me, baby."

You hesitantly bring your eyes back to meet his, prompting Corpse to praise you. You feel the blood rush to your cheeks at this.

"You promise?? I don't wanna be a distraction, I-"

Wordlessly, Corpse brushes his thumb on your bottom lip, causing you to quiet down immediately.

"What are you saying? I always have time for you. Now c'mon."

You giggle as Corpse lifts you up into his arms bridal style and takes you to the living room.

You end up watching a Studio Ghibli movie together, tucked underneath blankets and with you snuggled up into Corpse's chest.

At some point during the movie, you unwrap one of Corpse's arms around you and take his hand. This causes Corpse to unconciously hold your hand in his big, calloused ones, adorned with metal rings.

You both look down to where he held you.

"Awe, now would you look at that. Your hand looks so cute, the way it fits in mine," he coos, causing you to sink further into your blankets, hiding your blush.

"Mm stop," you pout, only making Corpse chuckle some more.

"You're hiding because you're blushing?"

"Yes!! Now stop laughing, you big meanie."

Corpse only responds by lifting you back onto his lap, resting his chin on your head.

"Aww, you really are blushing like a rose," Corpse fawns. "Aren't you just a pretty little thing?"

You decide not to sass back and instead accept the praise.

As you both refocused your attention on the screen, Corpse lets go of your hand and instead runs his fingers through your hair. You hum in satisfaction, leaning into his touch. Corpse continues to do this all while he whispers sweet nothings and praises in your ear until you drift off into a blissful sleep.

After what feels like an hour later, but was really just thirty minutes, Corpse's phone chimes, his screen lighting up to reveal a text notification.

As softly as he can, Corpse reaches over to the side table to grab his phone. Despite his efforts, you wake up from the movement and the sudden lack of warmth that was once wrapped around your body.

You huff in annoyance.

"I thought you said you weren't busyyy."

"I know, little one. Sean wants me to join a game with the others. If you want, you can watch us play. We won't be streaming."

You nod in agreement, and once again, Corpse carries you into the studio, setting you down on his lap soon as he sits down.

You hear a little beep, followed by a variety of voices, all talking above one another. It comes to a stop, though, and you're relieved of the overstimulation as soon as they realize Corpse had joined the call.

"Hey, Corpse is here!"

"What's up, Corpse?"

"Hey guys," Corpse greets them. "I hope you don't mind that Y/N's with me right now. They're little again and I promised I'd spend time with them."

You heard some 'aww's' in the back as voices overlapped again.

"Oh, no, yeah of course we're okay with that."

"That's really sweet!"

"All right, guys, no cursing or excessive yelling! If you scare Y/N, you're gonna have me to answer to!"

Though they couldn't see you, you still shyly huddled closer into Corpse's chest. Corpse's friends, being your friends as well, knew that you were an age regressor and were fully supportive and accepting. So this wasn't the only occassion where they'd played with little you around to watch.

"Thank you," you mumbled sleepily into the mic before yawning and laying back down into Corpse.

He gives you a kiss on the top of your head before he goes back to chatting and playing with his friends. An hour passes, and then it's night. The cold nighttime air seeps in through the windows, causing goosebumps to form on your exposed skin.

Silently, you tug at Corpse's hoodie, prompting him to look down at you. Though you've been quiet throughout the past hour, Corpse hadn't forgotten about you.

He raises a brow, confused for a second until you grab at his hoodie again with pleading eyes.

"'M cold, daddy."

"Shh, okay, baby, I got you."

Corpse pulls his sweater over his head, and on instinct, you raise your arms up as well. Corpse takes his hoodie and puts it on you, causing you to giggle in delight.

"There you go. Is that better?"

You beam, "Mhm!"

As Corpse shared this moment with you, he was still blissfully unaware that his mic was still on. That was, until he heard the choruses of "awe's" in his headphones.