#once again kicking something out of the drafts lol

[lizardkingeliot]

interview with the vampire (2022-) 1.01 | in throes of increasing wonder

What rage you must feel as you choke on your sorrow. The first time I laid eyes on you, your beautiful face, I saw that sorrow. I did not know how it got there, or why it was so voluminous. I can take away that sorrow, Louis. I can give you that death you begged your feeble, blind, degenerate, nonexistent god for. But I can do it. Joyfully. I can swap this life of shame, swap it out for a dark gift, and a power you can't begin to imagine. You just have to ask me for it. You just have to nod your beautiful head and say yes.

[mistymisfit]

Hounds of love

Summary: Jason wakes up from a bad dream, lucky for him he's got you to make him feel better. Based on the song Hounds of love by Kate Bush (and that post I made in april)

warnings: hurt/comfort, established relationship ,I think it's gender neutral but lmk if I missed anything.

wc: 1,5k

a/n: sorry for the --summarized-- psychoanalysis class lol (this has been in my drafts since april idk why I didn't post sooner)

Jason had always yearned for love, any type of love he could get. Ever since he was a child, afraid and hiding in the dark cold streets of Gotham, he's always wanted to be loved- to be so full of love he wouldn't be able to take it anymore. But he's always been a coward, every time someone would get close enough he'd start fighting it, self-sabotaging as if he subconsciously knew he did not deserve it. His own father, his mom, his stepmother, Bruce, he'd been let down time and time again by the adults in his life supposed to protect him. If they couldn't give him what he wanted, love him, who could?

The dread, or rather the certainty he had over being unlovable shadowed over him, as much as he tried to push it down and pretend he didn't need it. His own biological parents left him, they never wanted him. The very people who were supposed to love him, he was their son. They brought him into this world, it was their responsibility. Then he'd say he didn't even like Bruce to begin with, who cares if he chose to adopt him? Who cared if he looked up to him so dearly once as a child? He had died under his care, Jason had almost everything he wanted and went ahead and ruined it-- all because he was too afraid to accept it, because he was too stubborn. You just had to go after him on your own, he'd blame himself.

Now he keeps having this recurring dream; he's being chased by something in some woods, and he keeps running. He wants to ask for help, he really does but his mouth won't open. Then he gets to a lake, takes his shoes off, throws them in the lake and takes two steps on the water. Some days that does it, he feels like the thing is no longer chasing him. But most days he wakes up before he can feel he's lost the thing chasing him.

Tonight he's holding a wounded fox in his hands, attacked by bigger animals, in the midst of escaping. The poor thing looks at him with kind, almost human, eyes. He feels its little heart pounding fast on its chest, the little animal feels familiar. He knows this fox from somewhere else. How else would it let him hold it? Why else would he stop running, too guilty to leave it alone? He feels ashamed of running away, but he has to. He's too scared to be there, he doesn't know what makes him so afraid to leave the poor animal on its own. None of this was real, there was nothing following him, he's never seen what's after him. So why couldn't he stay with the fox?

This night he wakes up sweating, agitated and with his heart kicking his ribs. He immediately kicks off the covers, and takes off his shirt when he feels the cotton starts to itch and stick to his skin. He knows he should try to calm himself down before he wakes you up, you had to be up in a few hours.

"Jay?" You slur, barely a whisper.

"Sorry my love," He apologizes, looking back to you rubbing your eyes "I'll go sleep on the couch"

"mmm, stay" you hum, still groggy with sleep but a hand of yours reaches out for him "bed's too cold"

He takes your hand in his before cuddling back next to you under the covers, limbs getting tangled together once again. And before he knows it he's got his head on your chest as you wrap your legs around him to keep him close.

"Where'd your shirt go?" You mumble, hands softly going across the expanse of his back.

"You complaining?" He teases to distract you and it works because you shake your head no with blushed cheeks. His hands sneaked under your clothes to hold you in a way that was almost a tradition now. He'd reach for your skin just to feel you there, to make sure you're safe and next to him and you weren't some hallucination he'd made up in his loneliness. If Jason had to he'd die and come again, crawling out of his coffin if it only meant he'd get to hold you like this one more time.

"Do you want to talk about it?" You ask

"About what?" He hums, too comfortable in your embrace to even be bothered with remembering what he was so stressed about.

"Why you are awake" There's a beat of silence after the sentence has come out of your mouth. The only thing that can be heard is the city's never-sleeping traffic in the distance. He doesn't want to burden you with something as measly as a dream, so what if it made him wake up in a sweat? It made no sense so he had no reason to be upset.

"Had a bad dream, wasn't really a nightmare..." He confesses after the silence." 's stupid go back to sleep"

"It's not stupid, tell me about it"

"Baby" He sighs, hoping he sounds pissed off enough for you to drop the subject.

"What? A dream can be your subconscious trying to get something you can't when you're awake"

"Mine must hate me"

"It doesn't, but it may want something youre not aware of"

"Since when do you know so much about dreams? Nerd" He teases, nuzzling his head to you. Realizing you're just as stubborn as him, he accepts defeat and tells you about his dream, "There's a thing chasing me and I'm running through some woods"

"What's the thing?" You ask

"I don't know" He scoffs, quick to dismiss it.

"Just think about it," You hike your leg higher up his waist and squeeze him closer to you if it was possible. "how did it feel?"

Tangling himself with you to the point where he can't tell where you end is where he feels like he can be vulnerable. Only when it feels like he might just become one with you he can let his guard completely down. So he sighs and takes a moment to do what you ask. He knows damn well what is after him, he's always known.

"Me, I think," He hides his face even further into your chest."my feelings"

You only hum in response, so he asks "Is it hard to love me?"

Now you understand where the dream came from. The moment he connected the thing chasing him with its meaning awoke an insecurity, something he was trying to keep buried down. So you waste no time in your reply.

"Loving someone has never come easier to me"

He finally lifts his head up, big blue eyes swelling up with tears. He looked so helpless but at the same time so full of devotion for you. He's loved, you love him, so it must mean that he can be. If he's deserving of your love, your selfless and pure love, then he's not unlovable. He kisses your jaw, and then your neck hearing a soft sigh of his name coming out of your lips. Knowing he's handed you his own heart in a silver platter, that he is yours to do as you please, Jason can rest at ease that you'd never harm him.

"Why do you ask?" You don't let yourself get distracted by his kisses.

"It's just that-" He sighs, maybe he can be vulnerable one more time with you. So he fights against the need to push you away and tries to find the right words "Don't think anyone's ever felt that with me, ever"

"Jay, your father became a henchman to provide for you," you point out, holding his face with both of your hands "Catherine raised you like her own, and believe it or not Bruce loves you, even if he's too emotionally constipated to show it"

He scoffs at that last part, blinking away the tears brimming his eyes, which, in your opinion, made them look shiny like a tainted glass panel in a church.

"Your older brother, loves you too, he calls me to see how you're doing every other week 'cause you won't answer him" You continue, "So does Alfred"

"Let's go back to sleep, okay?" He stops you; the sudden reality check is much more than what he could process at the moment. He's been so deep into his own thoughts, what he believed to be truth, that he didn't even bother to see it from a different perspective.

"You didn't even tell me what happened in your dream" You insist with a pout.

"I'll tell you tomorrow, I'm sorry I kept you up"

"I'm not" You smile, giving him a quick peck on the lips. A hand cups your cheek, making the kiss longer. You know that if he was on a better mood he would've said something along the lines of it not being a proper kiss. You giggle against his lips, and Jason just wonders how was he ever able to function without you.

[norman-fucking-reedus]

I read something that you said Scud liked to be recorded and I’m actually foaming at the mouth at the idea of that because it’s so real. I NEED a fic for that. So glad I found someone with a Scud obsession as bad as mine

LIGHTS, CAMERA, ACTION

THE GOOD GOOD: FemDom!Reader x Sub!Scud, recording during sex, lots of teasing, and edging, bit of bondage, your much needed dose of pegging, and scud crying during sex, don't forget the hair pulling

GUYS I LOVE SCUD SO MUCH I ABSOLUTELY ADORE HIM MY PRECIOUS LITTLE ANGEL

I'm really trying to get my drafts cleared out LOL hopefully sometime soon I'll have a big major posting spree and then I can start working on my inbox

I HAVE SO MANY REQUESTS AUUUGH IDK WHY I LET THEM ALL PILE UP SOMEONE KILL ME

The idea of Scud being recorded is still my favorite because I feel like he'd be so nervous under the lens, trying to hide from it and not be seen but he'd still end up looking like a slutty pornstar (my precious pornstar)

also scud in lace. its been on my mind for I don't even know how long at this point.

You sighed as you walked down your complex's dingy, dimly lit hallway, silently hoping that Scud wouldn't be too mad at you for coming home so late into the night. After all, you had told him that you would only be about ten more minutes, but that had been almost an hour ago.

Things got a little out of hand, nothing you couldn't deal with sure but it was quite an inconvenience. A short, fifteen-minute task had easily turned into a full job, one that included running around the shop looking for spare parts. With what you had learned from Blade and Scud, it didn't take long to find all the little pieces you needed, and even a reward for yourself.

"Scud! I'm back! Look at what was in the shop" You called out to him when you jingled your keys in the lock and swung the front door to your apartment open, eagerly kicking off your shoes as you toyed with the little camcorder you had come across, flipping through the random pictures on it. There was no clear indicator of who's camera exactly, but you had always loved photography, so just one day with it wouldn't hurt anyone.

There was no response to your voice, the apartment barely lit and quiet, soft thumping coming from you and Scud's shared bedroom. He was probably playing on his PS2 with his headphones in, loud music blasting at levels you’ve already scolded him for.

As you padded through the cozy living room, you pointed your camera at random things and took little cameos of them, making your way down the short and narrow hall towards the room where you could see some of the orange lighting spilling out through a crack in the door.

You approached, about to call out Scud’s name once again as the soft thumping faded into a rhythmic beat, a Lady Gaga track when you finally stopped short in front of the door, pushing it open a bit and poking your head through, combing hair out your eyes as your mind drew a blank, greedily taking in the sight in front of you.

Scud was in fact not playing on his game system, but rather prancing around the cozy room what he didn’t know was your very expensive lingerie set. An all-white, delicate full ‘angelic’ lingerie set. A satin ruffle top with a waist-high lace garter belt that clipped onto the white mesh fishnets, all paired with lacy underwear that had a large bow on the back, topped with a fair-sized opening that revealed a large portion of his dumb butt.

You had originally bought it to surprise your boyfriend a few months back, but you had both gotten so overcrowded with work that it slipped your mind, collecting a thin layer of dust somewhere you weren’t even sure where you had put it. Scud always got curious about your things when he was rocket-high, digging through things and asking a million and one questions. Now here he was, looking pretty as ever swaying his hips around in the bedroom, mumbling along to the current track playing.

You found yourself flipping the camcorder's small screen open and resting against the door frame as the device started to record, capturing Scud’s fluid movements as he obliviously danced around, brown curls falling sweetly in his face, and skin glowing orange from the multiple sources of warm light in the room.

He really did look like an angel, his broad body looking much more supple and soft, legs long and lean, hips wide and divine. A walking, talking piece of pure eye candy, reserved for your eyes and only your eyes. Guess this camera just found itself a new owner.

Scud spun around on his heels and toes, once, twice, before he stopped, eyes focusing on the small little red dot, flickering up to meet your gaze and feeling his entire exposed body heat up in embarrassment.

“W– Wha– How– How long– Hello– ” Scud sputtered, completely frozen in place as he stared at you.

You, who was now fully entering the bedroom, “Don’t stop now, I barely got any footage” placing your free hand on his small waist and dipping fingers under the fabric of the garter. A smile tugged your lips as you started taking in the entirety of your boyfriend's body up close, his skin soft and hot under the tips of your fingers. “Y– You’re re-recording me?” He knew the answer, but hearing it from you verbally just made a chill run down his spine, and his cock twitch.

“Does that make you nervous love?” Your fingers trailed up his scarred chest, brushing across the lose ruffled top and grazing his nipples, a small whine coming from Scud as he dipped down in order to hide his face, but you wouldn’t let him. “Look at me” You said as you lifted his head up by the chin, forcing his gaze onto yours.

Scud lightly whimpered, desire burning in his gut as you brushed hair out his face, fingers dancing along his skin. He felt exposed under the camera’s lens, so much of his raw and bare skin visible to the naked eye. Your gaze on his body made his cock throb.

“What do I always tell you about playing in my stuff?” You said in a condescending tone, teasing the tips of your fingers down his textured belly.

Scud shivered at your touch as goosebumps prickled his skin, a strained grunt coming from him as his face flushed. “N– not without mommy’s permission”

You slowly walk around him, taking in his full body in the set. “Don’t touch mommy’s things without permission. That’s a rule, right?” You murmur as you stop recording to take a picture of Scud’s ass, definitely filling out the panties better than you could.

“Yes…” He mumbles, and it almost comes out like a squeak. His cock aching with need and his stomach with embarrassment, heart pounding from a combination of nerves and weed.

You brush your lips against the skin of his shoulder, slipping fingers under the waistline of the lace undies. “So can you explain to me why said rule is broken?”

A whimper broke past Scud's lips as your fingers teased and explored his exposed skin, squeezing his hips and tracing scars. "I just– I just found it under the bed and didn't know what it was" Scud stumbled out, heart thumping in his chest as your hands covered more ground on his body, circling around to his back.

"Mhm?" You hummed, tracing your finger up his spine. He let out a moan as chills ran through his core, trembling under your touch as he could feel goosebumps explode across his skin. "Well, do you know what it is now?"

Scud nodded frantically at your words, "Yes! Yes– I know now" quivering as he spoke.

With one hand on his waist, the other still holding the camera, you guided him to the edge of the bed and pushed his upper half down onto the mattress, smiling softly to yourself as you eyed Scud's new position through the lens.

Click! Click!

The electric snap of the camera made Scud feel fuzzy and warm, slightly embarrassed, and very exposed. His skin was flushed a light red, some areas more blushed than the others. From where his cock was confined in the small panties, he was completely pulsing, throbbing with pure need in his gut.

"Do you also know not to break the rules?" You questioned, flipping through the few shots you had taken before moving your attention to the small walk-in closet, crouching down and reaching inside a box.

Scud whined into the soft comforter when you returned behind him, his socked feet barely reaching the rug between them. He could hear the small beep of the camera as you pressed your front to his bottom, a yelp coming from him when your palm made contact with his exposed cheek. "I asked, so answer"

"Y– Yes! Not breaking the rules is a rule" He whimpered, a shudder running through him as his skin tingled.

You smiled at his words as you caressed his side, squeezing his waist and hip slightly. "Good. Very good. So don't you think you deserve a punishment?"

Scud didn't respond, but he nodded his head, hiding his face the best he could behind his hair. You pushed the strands back and cooed at his cherry-red face, tiny whines coming from him as he squirmed under the camera's lens, jerking his hips slightly as he rutted against the edge of the bed.

Your hand made contact with his cheek again, a choked-off groan coming from his throat at your palm. "Words."

"Y– yes ma– ma'am..." He stuttered, trembling slightly with anticipation. It wasn't often that Scud got punished, even with as bratty as he was, so his cock was totally aching just thinking about whatever vile shit it was you were thinking about doing to him.

And you were thinking of doing some quite horrid things.

Teasingly, you ran your hand over the opening in his panties, prodding your finger at his puffy rim. A suppressed shudder traveled through him as his cock twitched, his hole fluttering at your air-light touch. You softly cooed at how needy he was, smiling to yourself as you single-handedly took off your shirt and tossed it on the floor somewhere to be picked up later.

From the box in your closet, you had pulled your strap set, a pair of cuffs, and a long vibrator that you had been wanting to test out for a little while.

Cuffing Scud's hands behind his back with only five fingers was a bit of a challenge, but an easy one. He squirmed a little as you did it, wiggling his fingers as his wrists adjusted to the new sensation of the cuffs.

You shuffled around behind him, cursing softly as you knocked a few things over before tossing a bottle of lube along with the rest of your toys, pressing yourself against Scud as you leaned down near his ear, breath feather-light and hair tickling his skin. His heart pounded in his chest, and you could hear his pulse in his neck thumping.

“Just how should I punish you?” You murmur, trailing your lips against his ear lobe and teasing the skin with the very tip of your tongue.

“Maybe I should spank you ‘til it hurts to sit,” You run your free hand down to his ass and give it a slap for emphasis, followed by a squeeze just cause.

“Or maybe I could tie up those cute balls and see just how long it takes for you to pop” You hum, nibbling on Scud’s ear and tugging it with your teeth until you dropped it with an idea lingering in mind.

“Or," You said as you pulled away from him. "I could just leave you here by yourself” You smirked, watching Scud’s face twist in horror.

“No! No– please no” He pleaded as he squirmed on the bed, hips jerking in a desperate search for relief, cock painfully hard and throbbing. “Need a punishment, need mommy to punish me” Scud blabbed, his body trembling as his eyes darted from your face to the camera's lens, his body coated in a thin sheen of sweat.

“But how should I punish you?” You teasingly coo, combing some of a Scud’s bangs out one of his eyes as you smiled softly at him. “I could smoke our whole stash right in your face”

Scud groaned, “Please don’t” squeezing his legs as arousal burned hot in his gut. “I’m really sorry mommy, I– I’ll do anything”

“Oh, I know you will. Just stay still for me ‘kay?” You pushed yourself back up to your full height, pausing your recording to swap out the camera for the bottle of lube, shaking it slightly before uncapping it and squeezing out more than enough of the clear liquid onto Scud's puffy rim, watching the shiver that ran through him as the cold sensation rolled down to his sensitive balls.

You scooped it up with your two fingers and easily slid them inside Scud, a soft moan coming from him as he clenched around you, almost instantly pushing back in search of more. "Such a greedy little hole, you just wanna be fucked so badly don't you?"

Scud whined and squeezed his slick walls around your digits, "Yes! Want mommy to fill me up so bad, need her so bad" rubbing his face against the soft comforter as he could feel it burning hot.

"Don't worry baby boy, we're gonna get you all nice 'nd full right now" You spoke sweetly to him as you picked up the camera with one hand and the vibrator with the other, resuming your recording as the toy harshly rumbled to life after the click of a button. Without wasting a second, you watched as the buzzing wand glided into Scud with zero resistance, pressing it directly against his sweet spot and causing him to loudly sputter, blabble, and cry out nonsense as the sudden vibration traveled through his entire nervous system, cock throbbing with the uncontrollable urge to cum.

Scud sobbed around his loud moans, choking out gasps when you started to quickly thrust the toy in and out, each hard bump to his now very sensitive prostrate only sent him closer to the edge, hands twitching and pulling where they were restrained as his body spasmed, heaving as his heart started to pound in his chest the harder and harder you fucked him, hips jerking down into the mattress as he tried to pathetically chase his rapidly building orgasm, a burning pleasure coursing through the entirety of his body before–

You swiftly pulled the toy out of him right as he was about to topple over the edge, a confused, strangled whimper tearing from his throat as his poor hole needily clenched around nothing, so full and pleased just a split second ago and now suddenly empty and crashing down from the way you abruptly ruined his orgasm.

“Sorry, my hand slipped” You mumbled, obviously not sorry at all as you teased his fluttering hole with the toy, capturing all your torturous movements through the little camera lens.

The cuffs rattled as Scud whined and squirmed at the contact against his sensitive skin, trying his hardest to push back onto the vibrator while also jerking his hips away from it. He was so high, so hot and sweaty as he heaved from where he was on the bed, shaking as you tauntingly dragged the toy up from his slick balls to his drenched rim, only ever applying the slightest amount of pressure.

It made him push his hips back in desperation, letting out a surprised yelp when you smacked him with the toy, tutting your lips as you shook your head, placing the camera down and positioning it to capture Scud's hidden face, forcing his head up by roughly yanking a fistful of hair.

He whined as a shiver ran down his spine, trembling as his eyes nervously darted away from the lens, feeling his cheeks heat up in embarrassment at being recorded in such an exposed state. His cock was still painfully aching, whole body throbbing uncontrollably from your early treatment.

Scud made tiny little whimpers when you started to tease his hole again with the toy, his hips twitching as he tried not to jerk them back, desperate and craving to be filled up again. His gut ached with arousal, cock leaking painfully where it was confined in the small panties.

"P– Please fuck me, please mommy" He begged as you dipped your head down and started nibbling at his bare shoulder, teasing the skin of his hip with your fingers.

You blew on his ear as you ran the length of the vibrator up his slick crack, a keen noise pulling out his throat as his hole fluttered in anticipation. "Is this what you want pretty boy? To be stuffed like a dumb slut?"

Scud whined at your words, nodding his head and hiding his face shyly behind his hair, jumping slightly when you tightly gripped his jaw, lifting his head once more and dropping it to pick up your camera.

"You're so cute when you're nervous" You said to him as you smooshed your cheek against his, pointing the lens at the both of you and snapping a few pictures, Scud's face red and embarrassed as the flash flickered, electric shutter ringing in his ears.

Scud huffed slightly as his socked toes brushed the rug beneath him, kicking his feet impatiently as need and heat burned through his veins. He whined softly when you pulled away from him entirely, leaving the camcorder pointed at him to capture his facial expressions when you suddenly shoved the entirety of the vibrator back into him, a loud and shaky moan tearing from Scud's throat as the toy easily slid into him, almost yelling when it buzzed to life against his sensitive walls.

His hands curled into one another where his arms were stretched behind his back, yet immediately scrambled to wrap around your wrist when you trailed fingers up his spine, his fingers twitching and trembling as they latched onto you, incoherent mumbles leaving Scud's lips.

As you started to properly fuck him with the toy, quickly thrusting it in and out as he tensed up at the sensation, shuddering as his jaw went slack and he started to desperately yet sloppy push back against your movements, toes curling into the carpet as you shoved the vibrator right into his sweet spot, stars dancing in his eyes and coursing through his body.

"I bet that feels so good huh pretty boy? Gonna cum aren't you?" You taunted as you fucked him quicker with the silicone toy, watching the way he had started to twitch and squirm, his whimpers and cries starting to increase in volume. Scud tried to respond to your questions, but his words only came out as a garbled mess.

It earned a small laugh from you, pressing yourself up against him and dipping your head down to attack his neck, running your tongue over his pulse, and feeling his heart race under the muscle. "Didn't quite catch that" You murmured into his ear, slowing down your movements as you searched for Scud's sweet spot, a broken sob tearing from his lips when you found it. "Yes," He gasped, trembling underneath you as he heaved for air, clumsily stuttering out his words. "Wanna cum so bad, want mommy to make me cum"

Scud tugged and pulled at his restraints as he choked back cries, clumsily pushing back against your movements desperately as he chased after his rapidly building orgasm, babbling brainlessly. He could feel the buzzing sensation in his toes, all the way up to his teeth, it made his head foggy and his jaw go slack, not sure if the high he was greedily riding was from the weed or sheer pleasure, but it had him on cloud nine either way.

Each thrust brought him closer and closer, so close he could practically taste it. A needy, broken whimper came from his chest as his body twitched against you, small pleas starting to fall from his lips as his untouched cock throbbed from his burning climax, lungs running out of air as his body started to tense up, standing right on the edge and about to fall down face first when you yanked the toy right out of him again, Scud whining and basically sobbing in protest as his hole uncontrollably clenched down around nothing, heavy groans leaving him as his body struggled to recover from the way you completely denied him again.

"Oh Please, please mommy, please" Scud sobbed as his body felt so empty and used, desperately craving the relief that he needed so badly.

You shut the toy off and tossed it down on the bed, taking hold of the camcorder and stopping your recording, snapping a few pictures of how utterly destroyed Scud was, face soaked with his tears and drool as he weakly rutted his hips in search of any type of pleasure. He whimpered softly at the flash of light, feeling exposed and nude under the lens.

"It's okay Scud, you've been doing so well for me. Momma's gonna make you feel so good" You murmured comfortingly into his ears as you pressed a kiss to his cheek, pushing your body up off his and leaving the camera on the bed. Scud still whined out in protest as your body heat left his, leaving him cold and lonely. His heart started to soar and quickly pick up speed when he heard the familiar sound of your strap buckling together, small mutters and curses coming from you as there was a slight struggle.

It wasn't long before you reappeared behind Scud, this time pressing your cock against him. Anticipation sparked to life in his tummy as you dragged the silicone through his slick, unable to help himself from pushing back against you with tiny little sounds. He needed it so bad that his body was practically begging for release, involuntarily twitching.

Scud was so close to an absolute breakdown, whimpering and mumbling incoherently as you finally started to push in at a tauntingly slow pace, the lube helping to make it an easy glide and blissful stretch. His head dropped down onto the mattress as sparks flew up his spine, so understimulated that even the slightest of touch would probably send him tipping over the edge.

You readjusted your camcorder with one hand and the tightly tangled the other in his hair, yanking his head back up to be captured in the lens, giggling at the groan that left Scud’s lips. “Come on pretty boy, keep your head up for momma”

“Need– Need it–“ Scud started to babble, head totally clouded and overworked as he desperately jerked his hips, rocking them back and forth to get any type of stimulation at all, trembling like a leaf on a branch when he felt the tip of your strap finally, finally jab right into his tender and used sweet spot, knees buckling between him as he involuntarily squeezed your wrist tightly, nails digging into the flesh as the orgasm his body had been begging for completely took over, loud and broken sobs leaving Scud’s lips as his untouched cock throbbed and pulsated, cumming right in the lace panties of the lingerie set.

The fact that you captured that on camera almost made your mouth water, and you cooed at Scud when he went ragdoll in your hold, stroking his side to give him some comfort as he slowly came back down to earth. “Oh, you poor little thing. Did I tease too much?”

Scud could barely even muster out words, breathing into the mattress as his body twitched, small grunts and whimpers coming from him your hand in his hair kept his head upright and his face vulnerable, tears streaming down his reddened cheeks.

“Or, did I not tease you enough?” You murmured the question softly in his ear, moving to grab a fist full of hair from the front and gripping his cuffed wrists, yanking both backward as you took a step forward to shove the entirety of your cock into Scud, who could almost taste the pleasure coursing through him. A choked sob tore itself from his throat, eyes darting frantically between the wall and camera lens as it felt like pure heaven burned it’s way up his spine, hands twitching and curling in on themselves under your grip.

It was arguably the best he’s ever felt in days, weeks even. When you started to relentlessly and mercilessly slam into him, each thrust going right to his core and sending his eyes rolling into the back of his head, lips glossy and slick with spit as he drooled from the mouthwatering pleasure.

“You’re just so, so cute Scud. I can’t wait to watch our little movie over and over and over again” You said as you tilted his head to the side by his hair, biting down harshly on the flesh of his already bruised and marked neck, a shriek pulling its way out his chest as all five of his senses were at a complete overload, skin flushing a deep red when he felt your teeth blissfully break skin. It was all so overwhelming, the wet glide of your cock slipping in and out against his tender velvety walls was simply too much for his mind to be able to comprehend, hips jerking as his second orgasm built up rapidly, like a can of soda that had been shaken up and was just waiting for someone to pop the tap.

He heard the sound of the cuffs clicking off before he felt the fuzzy material sliding off his wrists, your hands finding his and intertwining your fingers together, pinning his hands down on the mattress to fuck him with all the womanly strength left in you, sending the silicone as deep and hard into your angelic boyfriend as your body would possibly allow for. Scud’s head involuntarily dropped right down onto the blankets, whimpers and broken moans tumbling past his lips as he tightly squeezed your fingers, so close to the edge that this time he really could taste it.

“Please momma, please, please– fuuck, please” Scud helplessly babbled, needily pushing back to meet your thrusts as he was so fucking close, so close that he’d almost do anything just to cum, not that there was much to do considering he was already crashing down the hill, just needing a few more rough thrusts of your hips before his tap was finally popped, an explosion of fizzy stickiness exploding right in his gut, his second orgasm spilling right into the already soiled underwear, seeping through and dripping down onto the floor.

Scud went totally limp where he laid face down on the bed, breathing heavily as he twitched and tried to come down from such an earth shattering high, whining softly when you pulled out.

Tiny kisses were planted all over his face, neck, and shoulders, you gently brushing his hair out his face and unsticking it from his sweaty forehead. “You okay?”

Scud nodded, with his eyes half-lidded and a content smile tugging at his lips. “Mhmm”

“Did you learn your lesson?” You asked, pulling the bra strap and letting it snap against Scud’s flesh, a small grunt leaving him as his skin burned. “Yes ma’am…” He grumbled out, feet dangling off the bed.

You smiled softly, kissing him right below his eye. “Good baby. Now let’s get you all squeaky clean and cozy for bed, then we can find a way to put our special show on the TV for only our eyes to see” You said with a hint of mischief in your tone, reaching for the camcorder and stopping your recording once and for all.

Whoa. Did Norman fucking reedus just fucking finish something. Did Normam fucking reedus just post something. Whoa. How crazy even is that.

ANYWAYS 😝 yes guys I still love Scud he's still my angel boy and be always will be I love the part of the fic where my peenar goes inside his body thats the best part hands down I love to fuck men with my lady peenar

One fic at a time guys 🙂‍↕️🙂‍↕️ I have a few others that eeerm should get posted soon… dont get your hopes up (because mine are already up and that's a problem)

IF YOU SEE TYPOS NO UOU DONNNT 😭 MY GRAMMARLY IS ON MY COMPUTER AND THE APP IS GARBAGE ON MY PHONE PLEASE STOP THIS MADNESS

I was gonna end this with the cam corder MaGiCaLlYy disappearing 👁️ but that's for another fic 🙂‍↕️ (that ill end up never writing)

[deanstead]

With Spencer

Pairing: Spencer Reid x Reader

Requested: no

Summary: Y/N deals with the wave of anxiety that hits her after Spencer's conference

Word Count: 900+

Tags/Warnings: established relationship, anxiety, insecurities

A/N: Had to get this out of my head so I wrote this on a whim, then it sat in my drafts because I was worried it sucked (still am) but @halsteadlover once again threatened to kick my ass (because that's how we communicate love) so I'm posting this. Please do not shoot me if it sucks lol.

SPENCER REID MASTERLIST

You stood off to the side of the spacious conference hall, quietly watching as people approached him after his spotlight presentation.

You’d have been able to spot him anywhere he was standing even if the place was twice as crowded as it was now.

There seemed to be something that had drawn you to him almost automatically since the first time you met, and he seemed to emit a glow that only you could see.

Spencer raised his head slightly, his eyes locking onto yours effortlessly, and he smiled softly at you before his attention was drawn back to the person next to him.

You couldn’t help the small smile that flit across your face, accompanied by the familiar flutter in your gut that only Spencer managed to make you feel.

At the same time, a darker swirl of insecurity seemed to rise up to meet the innocent butterfly flitting around in your stomach.

It wasn’t new. This feeling of being inadequate next to Spencer, the feeling that he was made for greater things and that maybe somehow you were holding him back. It was totally irrational but the thought still greeted you once in a while. Sometimes it reared its head when he made a joke that you didn’t totally get or when he started rambling and you lost him halfway. But even if that wasn’t it, personally watching him stand up in front of an entire conference hall and deliver facts and research you didn’t fully grasp would definitely do it.

You didn’t know how long you stood there, lost in your thoughts while trying to keep the dark swirl of anxiety as controlled as possible.

“Sorry, I didn’t expect to take so long.”

His voice pulled you out of your thoughts and you smiled back at him, although the look in his eyes told you that he knew something was up.

Spencer didn’t ask, merely smiling as he let you lead the way out of the hall and to the car.

It was about halfway through the car ride back that you realized you’d been a little too quiet. But that realization was too late.

“You okay?” Spencer asked quietly.

You looked up into his hazel eyes and tried a smile.

Spencer didn’t say anything, his eyes flicking back to the road before he made a deviation in his route and you raised your eyebrows.

“Caffeine replenish.” He said quietly, as if he could read your mind.

You watched Spencer as he stood at the counter, letting the intrusive thought of ‘maybe coming with him wasn’t such a great idea’ creep into your head.

When Spencer had asked if you wanted to come, all you’d thought about had been how happy you were that he wanted you there, and about how you’d take any extra time you could spend with Spencer before work whisked him away again.

You wondered if you would still have come if you’d known how you would be feeling now. Yet, something told you that you would have. Nothing would have deterred you from time with Spencer.

That thought was merely reinforced when Spencer slid into the seat opposite you, armed with your favorite coffee order.

After a short silence, Spencer broke it. "You okay?"

You nodded, then you shrugged realizing how futile it was to try to hide your emotions from your profiler boyfriend who was sitting opposite you.

You looked back down at your coffee, and sighed.

“You were amazing today, Spence. Really amazing.”

Spencer smiled back at you, the shy smile that seemed to be reserved just for you and you felt your heart flutter once again.

“You are amazing. And I just… well, I’m not.”

Spencer blinked back at you.

“Actually, recent studies have shown that couples are indeed more likely to be similar than different, but it also shows that other than similarities, complementary skills and features are just as important…” He paused mid-sentence. “I’m rambling again, right?”

You couldn’t help but crack a smile.

“What I’m saying is, you are amazing.” Spencer concluded.

Now, it was your turn to blink back at him.

“You have no idea. I can explain a lot of things, Y/N. But I can’t explain this. I can’t explain why we fit together like the last two pieces of a puzzle that didn’t seem likely but are actually the only two pieces that are supposed to be together. We just are.”

You ran your finger across the rim of your mug and Spencer reached out for your hand, taking it and playing gently with your fingers, almost like a habit.

“We are meant to be, crazy as that sounds coming from me.” Spencer laughed as he said it.

You let out a small chuckle.

“So don’t…” Spencer said, his voice dropping lower just slightly as his voice trailed off.

You glanced up now, unable to miss the crack of slight insecurity in his voice and you realized he was just as scared as you were.

Spencer smiled. "See? Similarity."

Sliding your hand out of his grasp momentarily, you made your way to sit by him in the small corner booth, sitting as close as you could before you slipped your hand back into his.

“I could never.” You whispered, in response to the sentence Spencer hadn't been able to bring himself to finish.

Spencer didn’t answer, just leaned toward you, taking your face gently in his hands as he pressed his lips against yours, almost like he was sealing a deal. You smiled against his touch, pulling closer to him, before you nuzzled your face into the crook of his neck.

The dark swirl was still there in the pit of your stomach, although it was slightly muted, but somehow but it didn’t matter because Spencer was here as well.

And as long as you had Spencer, the dark swirl had nothing on you.

THANK YOU FOR READING!! PLEASE TELL ME WHAT YOU THOUGHT OF THIS!!

If you want to support me, buy me a coffee!

[jennaajoseph]

ㅤㅤㅤ ❛ The beginnings. ❜ ⸻ David Loki x F!Reader.

── ﹙౨ৎ ⋆｡˚ MASTERLIST&INFO.﹚. ☆

౨ৎ ⋆｡˚ SUMMARY. ⸻ You and David remembered your sweet beginnings together.

౨ৎ ⋆｡˚ PAIRING. ⸻ david loki x fem!reader.

౨ৎ ⋆｡˚ CONTENTS. ⸻ none, mostly fluff, female reader.

౨ৎ ⋆｡˚ A/N. ⸻ amazing request from anon!! (I'm so sorry it took so long) I tried a bit of a different style this time, I hope it doesn't look too bad?? I've tried to make Loki more brightful/flirty person in this. I need this man to be happy for once lol.

Work is kicking my ass lately lol, sorry for being inactive with fics, I'm still working on a few requests!! I have a few fics in my drafts I wanted to post for a long time so stay turned.

౨ৎ ⋆｡˚ CREDITS. ⸻ photos - pinterest (cropped by me) , divider - @/cafekitsune.

ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ ﹙©jennaajoseph﹚

You laughed at another funny memory with David that you remembered. "Oh, c'mon, that was embarrassing." He covered his face with both hands, feeling embarrassed.

"What?! It was adorable!" You chuckled softly.

He gently shook his head. A small smile appeared on his face at the memory of him wearing a pink shirt to one of your dates because you once said that pink is pretty. Later, he found out that it wasn't even your favourite color at all. "Do you know how stupid I felt after?"

"I was actually amazed that you were paying attention to little things like that." You leaned a bit closer to his face.

"I just wanted to do my best." He smiled as you leaned closer to him, looking into your eyes. "Impress you, you know?"

"You impressed me a lot, just like the first time we met." You gave him a toothy grin and he raised an eyebrow.

"Was there something wrong with our first meeting?"

"You don't remember? You were so eager to keep talking to me."

"I wanted to keep the conversation going! You really interested me that day." He tried defended himself.

You chuckled shaking your head gently at the memory.

⭑⭒⭒

David was sitting quietly at his table, drinking coffee. His eyes occasionally landed on you from time to time. You were peacefully typing on your computer, trying to finish the work that needed to be done for tomorrow morning.

The cafe was empty, there was no one besides you and him. A few small drops of rain were softly hitting the glass windows, making it not too uncomfortably quiet.

"Anything else?" The server looked at David, holding a coffee pot.

His gaze quickly dropped off you when he heard the waitress. "Oh, no, not really, thank you."

"If you need something, I will be behind the counter." She said softly, smiling. David returned a small smile. When the waitress walked in the opposite direction, his eyes landed on you again.

Your gaze accidentally met his, you quickly turned to look back into your computer, furrowing your eyebrows. His eyes dropped to look at his half-empty cup of coffee.

Despite everything, you could still feel his gaze on you, his eyes were basically burned into you, and you felt it. Your mind was telling you that he was just another creep that wanted to say some nasty joke when the time is right, and that was the last thing that you wanted to hear today.

"Could you stop staring at me, please?" You finally spoke, and his gaze met yours again.

"I'm sorry." He said a bit ashamed, his eyes dropped down again. "I just thought that you look really good today." He added awkwardly.

"Thanks, but you don't need to burn your eyes into me." You chuckled, looking at your computer again.

"It's hard not to look at you." He gave you a small, flirty grin. You rolled your eyes.

"I didn't know I was that pretty for some random stranger." You looked back at him. A small, almost unnoticable blush appeared on his cheeks.

"What are you writing?" He took a sip of his warm drink.

"I have some work due tomorrow."

"I'm probably distracting you, don't I?"

"A little bit." You gave him a playfull smile. "I could feel you staring at me like a creep, and I couldn't focus."

He placed the cup back on the table, chuckling awkwardly. "Sorry."

You rolled your eyes, smiling and started typing on your computer again. "Next time when you stare at some random girl, don't make it that obvious or scary."

He chuckled quietly, shaking his head. David wanted to keep the conversation going, but also didn't want too sound pushy or needy. You intrigued him, and he couldn't just let you slip past his fingers. "Thanks for the advice."

You gave him a quick wink and kept writing. Despite your comments, Loki kept staring at you. There was something about you that was different, unique. Something that intrigued him.

He decided to take another shot, and kept talking, even if it was something that would make you annoyed again. "I've never seen you here before."

"Because I've never been here before." You stopped typing, and looked at him again.

"You just moved in?"

"You are trying so hard, aren't you?" You closed your computer.

"Isn't what people do when they are interested in someone?" He gave you a cheeky grin.

"What if I told you that I have a boyfriend?" You returned the grin.

He shrugged softly. "I don't know, you have one?"

"Maybe."

"Maybe?"

⭑⭒⭒

"You were playing so hard to get, y/n, that's all I can remember." He said suddenly, getting you out of your thoughts.

"You were creepy."

"I was just showing interest in you." He put his arm around you, and pulled you closer.

"In a very creepy way." You smiled, laying your head on his chest.

"What exactly was creepy in my behavior?"

"The way you were staring at me, almost all the damn time."

David couldn't help but chuckle. "But in the end, you agreed for a coffee with me, don't you?" He smiled gently as you looked up at him.

"I think in the end, you intrigued me too."

⭑⭒⭒

"What do you think?" You leaned in your seat.

"If you had someone, you wouldn't talk to me."

"Smart."

"I think there's only one way to find out." He started, and you raised your eyebrow. "Would you go out for a coffee with me sometime?"

You smiled gently, he returned a smile. "When?"

"Same place at 8 tomorrow? I can pick you up."

"You are very forward, aren't you?" You stood up from your seat, and packed the device into your bag. "I will get here by myself, but thank you."

"As you wish then."

You took a few steps towards him and held your hand out. "It was nice to meet you..."

His eyes sparkled a bit, unnoticeable for you to see.

"David, David Loki." His hand squeezed yours.

"Y/n L/n."

"It was also nice to meet you, y/n."

⭑⭒⭒

"I hated the coffee you bought for me the next day." You blurred out suddenly, chuckling.

He sighed, rolling his eyes playfully.

"But I had a very nice time, you know?" You looked up at him. "I'm really glad that you tried to keep the conversation going."

"I'm very glad about that too." He leaned softly to kiss your forehead.

[tom-foolery-incorporated]

hi I saw you do requests but you don't have a faq I can find so please feel free to ignore if this isn't ur vibe but!!! I absolutely Love the past two shockwave x reader petplay fics you've written and i was wondering if you could write something for shockwave trusting his human to get him off in a more submissive bottoming way? like him on the receiving end and maybe submitting to them (in a sort of role-playing situation. we obv know he's like. yknow lol)

if that isn't ur vibe could you write him maybe rewarding + praising his human after working a long, grueling shift ? 😭🥺 thank you!!!

I’m glad you like them!!!! It makes me so happy that people like my writing 😭

I have another Shockwave petplay fic in my drafts but it’s gonna be a lot longer than other two :3c

I just had a long grueling shift a couple days ago soooooooooo

Shockwave x reader, gender neutral, racially ambiguous, SFW (for once), reader’s job is vague, reader goes nonverbal, stressed out reader, Shockwave pampers reader with a bath

Shockwave already knew you were home when he was alerted that the door to the modified bunker you both lived in had been opened.

He turned his attention from his current tinkering to the security camera he had installed at the entrance. He expected to see you making a silly face at him or flipping him off playfully or even just going about your business. Instead he saw you slumped over tossing your bag onto the floor and kicking off your shoes with enough force he could hear the small thunk of them against the floor.

While very few, including Shockwave himself, would say he was in tune to the emotions of others right now your emotions were very obvious. He let out an exvent before pushing himself up out of his chair and making his way towards you.

You heard his metal pedes clanking against the cement floor. His yellow optic shone in the dark hallway as he turned around the corner to greet you.

Your eyes were bloodshot and puffy a telltale sign that you had been crying. The little sniffles you made only confirmed his hypothesis.

“(Y/N),” Shockwave’s voice was cold and even as if he was simply regarding your presence as fact but you knew better.

You looked up at your robotic lover while rubbing your eye with the heel of your palm. Shockwave reached his servo down to rub at your cheek. The soft skin there cold and clammy from your tears. He gently cupped your face in his servo as he knelt down with his canon resting over his knee.

“Are you injured?” His servo basically encompassed half your body as he stroked at your face with his thumb. You shook your head to Shockwave’s question. “I would like to confirm,” Shockwave said leaning down closer to you. “It’s not that I don’t trust you to tell me when you’re injured but I need to make sure you are not damaged.”

Shockwave felt up your body gently looking for any discomfort while he scanned you over with his optic. When he was finished he let he servo rest against your back cradling you where you stood.

“You are fully operational,” Shockwave said mostly to himself. “Has something happened?”

You groaned curling against his servo. That was all the confirmation he needed. “We have implemented a safety plan for when you are in distress,” Shockwave pushed against your back so you’d shuffle closer to him. “I believe it would be most logical to follow our agreed upon methods to help you.”

You looked up at Shockwave with big wet eyes. You reached your hands up at him with your fingers spread wide. He let out an amused exvent as he picked you up and with the same motion stood up to his full height.

He placed you upon his protruding chasis with your upper body resting against his cyclopian helm and his servo cupping your lap to keep you balanced. Your arms flung around his optic in a tight hug as your body started to shake once again stricken with tears. Shockwave’s finials flattened backwards upset with your current state. His digits stroked lovingly over your lap to comfort you as your tears wetted the side of his optic helm.

“Would you like to bathe before changing into your sleep coverings?” Shockwave asked tenderly.

He could feel you nod against his helm. His grip on your lap tightened protectively as he started to make his way towards the human washroom he had put together for you. It coincided with the wash rack he had built for his own sanitary purposes making your bathroom look like a carwash with a vanity. It was oddly cute how Shockwave would combine your necessary spaces. While he always claimed it was “-only logical due to our limited habitable space,” you knew he simply just wanted you around him at all times.

While Shockwave secretly wished you’d quit your job for this very reason he understood that the current economic system you lived under didn’t allow that just yet. Shockwave fantasizes about having you as his perfect house spouse preparing him his energon and helping with him relax after a long day working in his lab. In fact, how cute would you be as his little lab assistant? The idea made the scientist giddy and his spark skip a pulse at the idea. However, Shockwave would keep his self indulgent fantasies to himself for now. He still needed to care for his beautiful partner as they shiver so sadly in his servo.

The doors to your shared bathroom slid open with a whirring noise. You peaked out from your hiding place against Shockwave’s helm to watch him make his way to the human part of the washroom.

“Do you believe speaking about your day will help you cope with your current stress?” Shockwave asked as he knelt down next to the tub. Using the end of his canon arm, he tilted the spout handle into the on position letting the bathroom be filled with the sound of rushing water. He messed with the handle adjusting it until he saw that the temperature was fit enough for you. You only shook your head to his question.

“Very well, sweetspark,” Shockwave turned his helm to look at your poor body slumped against his shoulder. “I need you to test the water to make sure it is to your liking.” You nod letting Shockwave gently lift you off his shoulder and onto the tile floor. You reach your hand under the water then nod before twisting the plug to the bath closed.

Shockwave stroked your back gently. “I will fetch your scented items while you undress.” You looked over your shoulder at Shockwave and gave him a grateful smile. You could hear the whirring of his metal joints as he lifted himself up and moved towards your vanity. He poked through the cabinets looking for your special bath supplies as you stripped yourself of your work clothes.

“Will this suffice?” Shockwave asked holding up the bag of epsom salts in your direction. You nodded now fully nude and stepping into the warm water. Shockwave kneeled back down gently tipping a good amount of the salt into your water before resealing the bag and setting it down next to the tub.

“You have worked so hard today,” Shockwave said while stroking your hair with one of his digits. “I believe you deserve to rest.”

You felt your bones turn to mush as you pushed your head up against Shockwave’s finger. You could hear a soft amused hum from the mech before he grabbed your wash cloth and favorite soap. It was honestly impressive how gentle and accurate Shockwave was when handling your things seeing as he was at least five times your size.

When he deemed the wash cloth properly lathered in soap he nudged your arm with his canon so you’d lift it out of the water for him. “You do not need to prove your worth through your work ethic,” Shockwave said softly as he rubbed the soapy cloth up your arm. It was a bit awkward for him to maneuver the wash cloth due to his size but you didn’t even care to notice. “I already know your worth, my love.”

You could feel the tears welling in your eyes as Shockwave rubbed the wash cloth along your back making sure to massage you with his fingers. “Now you will rest while I take care of my sparkmate.”

[svltzmans]

could you do fiona taking reader with a strap for the first time? 🙏

meddle about - f.g.

fiona gallagher x fem! reader

warnings: smut (18+), strap on use, dirty talk, nipple play, mommy kink if you squint really hard, this is so smutty lmaoooo

a/n: i'm back with a bang (literally lol). this has been in my drafts for so long 😶 but i'm obsessed with this request. i'm also writing this and posting without proofreading but i might check it later lmao

fiona kicks her shoes off, relieved to finally be in her apartment.

managing a diner is surprisingly difficult, and she had found that out the hard way.

despite the aches in her knees and ankles, she was quick to make her way home. she knew her girlfriend, y/n, had stayed over.

fiona makes herself blush, thinking about how thrilled she is to get home to y/n.

hearing the door close and fiona's shoes drop to the floor, y/n practically jumps out of bed, making her way to the foyer.

"hi baby," y/n coos, pulling fiona into a welcoming kiss.

fiona finds herself melting into y/n, her thoughts escalating despite the innocence of the contact.

"someone missed me, huh?" y/n teases, noticing fiona's change in reaction.

"just been thinking about you all day," fiona responds, wrapping her arms around her girlfriend.

"c'mere."

y/n extends her hand to fiona, encouraging her to follow.

fiona does so without thought, allowing y/n to guide her to their bedroom.

y/n sits on the bed, beckoning fiona to sit on her lap.

fiona wraps her legs around y/n's waist, resting her arms on her shoulders.

y/n instinctively leans in to kiss fiona, her fingers in her hair.

the kiss escalates quickly, fiona letting her hands roam over her girlfriend's body.

hearing y/n's quiet whines and feeling her start rocking back and forth flips a switch in fiona.

"lay down, baby girl," fiona mutters, gently pushing on y/n's chest.

y/n does as she's told with no hesitance, letting her body sink into the mattress.

fiona hovers over her, finger rested below her chin. she leans in to kiss y/n again, the closeness to her girlfriend's body driving her crazy.

y/n can't help but frown when fiona pulls away, only for her face to change immediately when fiona starts kissing her chest.

fiona stares up at y/n, her piercing eyes locked into hers.

she starts licking cirlces around y/n's nipple, her fingers rubbing the other.

"fi..." y/n moans, throwing her head back at the sensation.

hearing her girlfriend moan only turns fiona on more, and she can't help sucking harder to elicit a louder reaction from y/n.

"fiona!" y/n almost screams in pleasure, her body instinctively jerking upward.

hearing these sounds from her girlfriend practically breaks fiona. she pulls away, looking into her eyes.

"wanna try something new with you," fiona coos, running her finger along y/n's chin.

"new how?" y/n responds, growing more excited.

"you'll see. close your eyes for a sec."

y/n feels the bed rise and fall as fiona stands, retrieving something from the drawer.

a few seconds later, fiona stands at the foot of the bed.

"you can open 'em now."

when y/n takes her hands off her eyes, she has to blink a few times to ensure she's not dreaming.

her girlfriend had put on a strap, tightly affixing it to her waist. the sight put y/n in a daze immediately, her eyes instinctively rolling to the back of her head.

to y/n's surprise, fiona sits at the edge of the bed next to her waist.

her hand quickly makes it's way to y/n's underwear, their lips touching once again.

"gonna get you ready for me, use my fingers first," fiona mutters between kisses, her fingers hovering over y/n's clit.

y/n nearly screams when fiona puts two fingers inside of her, slowly pumping them in and out.

"fuck, faster baby. do it faster," y/n chants out, craving more of the feeling.

fiona hovers over y/n once again, slowly sliding her fingers out.

"think you're ready baby? i'm gonna fuck that pretty pussy of yours," fiona teases, putting a coil in y/n's stomach.

"please, oh god," y/n instantly responds, her desperation growing by the second.

"spread your legs for me."

fiona taps y/n's clit with the strap, earning sharp whines from the girl below her.

"holy shit, you're so wet already y/n," fiona praises, still lazily rubbing against her.

"are you gonna fuck me or wha-"

before y/n can even finish her quip, fiona pushes herself into y/n, the tip of the strap inside her.

"oh," y/n sighs, adjusting to the new sensation. she had never felt so full, even though fiona was far from all the way in.

fiona pushes deeper, burying half of the strap into y/n's pussy.

y/n lets out a guttural moan, the sensation driving her crazy.

"don't know if i can take it all, fi," she moans, hands laced in fiona's hair. "it's so big."

"i know you can take it baby. wanna fuck you so deep."

fiona is shocked by how good wearing the strap was making her feel, the base of it colliding with her clit with every movement.

they both moan loudly when fiona pushes all the way in, their waists colliding.

fiona starts slow, y/n quickly adjusting to the feeling.

"faster, please," y/n begs, desperation growing in her stomach.

fiona picks up her pace, moaning at the feeling of the strap against her body.

they both moan loudly, sloppily kissing as fiona hovers over y/n.

"that's my girl," fiona praises, feeling herself already growing close.

y/n feels like she can't stop making noise, her body out of her control.

"don't stop mo- m' getting close," y/n manages to save her slip up, not knowing fiona's thoughts about being called names like that.

fiona doesn't seem to notice, her body overtaken by such intense feeling.

"fuck baby, gonna cum with you. feels so good to fuck you like this," fiona breathes out, throwing her head back.

"need you inside me more often," y/n smirks, more whines escaping her lips.

"oh my god, i- i'm right there. cum with me, please," she cries out, grabbing onto fiona's shoulders.

"god baby, i'm cumming," fiona sighs, her body shaking as she struggles to stay up.

soon enough, she can't, and collapses next to y/n, starting to giggle.

"that was one hell of a surprise," y/n smirks, kissing fiona gently.

"wait, what did you call me before?" fiona sees y/n turn beet red, smiling at the shyness of her girlfriend.

"um, that's a tomorrow conversation."

[cringearenachamp]

The Trial By Fire Debacle, Part 2: Real Gay Tragic Idiot Dum Dum Hours

The Journey reunion was already something that Steve had agreed to very reluctantly, but if it was something he had to do, he wanted to do it for Neal. Various songs that I talked about in Part 1 of this particular analysis go over that, but the most sweet-but-also-heartbreaking song that hammers it home, for me, is an unreleased demo from the early 90s called Home At Last, which includes the lyrics: "Out of the shadows through the night/Keeping myself far from sight/I was a child lost and alone/Look at me now, this child has grown//It’s all in the past/With you I’m home at last//Standing together again/We’re face to face old friends/Feeling your truth here in my heart/I’m back again playing the part/My heart beating fast/With you I’m home at last"

Like, even without the Neal context this sounds like a coming out narrative. We've got the shadows/darkness references, feeling lost/alone/childlike, wanting to hide himself-- but now, also, stepping *OUT* of those shadows, so excited to show... someone... that he's finally learning to accept who and what he is, and wants to share it. This someone is an old friend, maybe someone who he feels is hiding something similar (but he's not telling hiiiiim~ *ahem*). It's also a reunion with this old friend, someone he felt he played some kind of role next to. It's a hope for acceptance and love. (There's a chance this could be another born-again religious song-- the "you" being god or jesus or whatever, lol-- and you can read it that way, too)

In a way, at least with the first reading of the song, this almost sounds like an early draft of Anyway-- one that was way more directed towards Neal than anyone else, and one that was probably WAY too open and vulnerable for Steve to actually put out on an official album of his (considering how guarded and private he tends to be). There's SO much hope in it, and when you listen to it within the context of how the reunion actually happened, it's kind of fucking crushing.

Steve's hopes of being more open with Neal were something that were already troubled by the new weakness within his voice (likely post-pneumonia effects), and maybe even more troubled by the fact that he was getting older just generally. So were all of them, of course, but Neal was still that reckless, impulsive 15 year old deep down. Impressing Neal meant racing cars with him, either drinking hard or putting up with his drinking (if i recall correctly Neal hadn't kicked alcohol yet at this point but def correct me if im wrong), and generally looking young: none of Neal's marriages were things that lasted, and they were all to young blonde women (and like... those poor women lol i really hope they had fun while it lasted and found someone better later). Steve probably hoped that he was different, somehow: they had a serious long-term connection on professional, emotional, and musical levels. He was also a ~man~, and maybe that would make a difference, too (of course, overlooking how a guy treats the women in his life because you don't think that applies to you or that it's not your business is a patriarchal tale as old as time). Would that be enough, regardless of what type of relationship he wanted? He extremely wanted it to be.

Once Steve got that hip injury and arthritis diagnosis, though, all that shit-- and the "worst experience of his career" concert from '91-- was probably at the forefront of his mind. His voice was already not in top form, and now he was physically failing in other ways, as well. From that point onward, I think, he believed he was going to get dumped on the side of the road. He couldn't be what he thought Neal wanted him to be. He couldn't be what he thought the band wanted him to be. He was a "failure". And that, as a perfectionist and as someone with a still fragile sense of self, was an absolute nightmare.

That, to me, is why he didn't talk to the band for months and months and months. He was ashamed of himself, heartbroken, anticipating rejection from the man he cared about most-- and he was panicking so much that all he knew how to do was avoid it all. But avoiding it made his worst nightmare ACTUALLY come true: he got kicked out of the band, and-- insult to injury for him-- JON did it, not Neal. Jon, the guy who had originally rejected Steve in certain ways. Jon, who wrote the song Steve's mother loved the most (Faithfully). Jon, who seemed to be fully accepted by Neal. Jon, who Steve had originally worried about usurping his place in the band hierarchy and structure.

OOOOOOOF.

Of course, there were probably plenty of professional reasons for Jon making the call-- first and foremost, he had the most even keel out of the three of them. Steve had also reached out to Jon in the beginning of the TBF reunion stuff, so it was sort of a reciprocation of that. But to Steve, not only was it insult to injury, but also probably a complete show of cowardice on Neal's part as well. Steve also claims that Jon told him that they were already trying out new singers, and this was one of the things that had gotten Steve to do the reunion to begin with: he still had a jealous streak, still had massive abandonment issues, and saw being replaced as an utter rejection of his Self and the work he did with the band. This particular time, though, probably also confirmed for him (whether it was true or not) that Neal wasn't someone he could count on-- that he was the one being treated like an obsolete model to be upgraded, now.

When someone is marginalized on (at least) one axis of class/privilege but can "pass" as a member of the hegemonic in-group, there can be an understandable temptation to try and assimilate to fit within this in-group as much as possible in order to stay safe and gain certain privileges you might not otherwise have. If you grow up marginalized, you also learn through various means that "normality" and fitting in are virtues, of sorts. Some kinds of assimilation can be necessary for survival purposes and even just getting by day-to-day. However, the conclusions of assimilation are ultimately a trap! For one thing, fitting in with the in-group means policing and disciplining members of that group for any signs of "out-group" behavior-- ex, Jon calling Steve "poncy". It also means treating members of out-groups more poorly-- for example, men's place at the top of the totem pole comes from pushing women downward in various ways (legally, culturally, etc). Assimilating into straight white masculinity means becoming more homophobic, misogynist and racist, even if just ambiently, or even just in what you put up with from your other bros (and bros within the music industry... *shudders* horrors go on in there). On top of all that, the minute you stop "passing" or the bounds of acceptability suddenly don't include you anymore, that's it for you!

So ultimately, I think, Steve thought he could avoid this trap by gaining as much control over the structure that he was trying to assimilate into as he could (the band). This was a failure for various reasons, including the fact that he did so on a mostly individualist/legal basis instead of a collective labor action (for example-- of course, in the 80s labor actions would have been difficult for Reagan reasons). It was also a failure because the structure of the band (and the corporation behind the band) was built by Herbie, to benefit Herbie the most (and then Neal, as his successor of sorts-- and Steve wasn't important enough on his own to persuade Neal, especially not in the maladaptive ways he was trying to influence things at the time).

Regardless of the tinkering Steve and his lawyer made to that structure and despite Herbie's absence, and regardless of how well Steve and some of the other members gelled musically and worked together in that sense, the members within that structure were going to act in accordance with the norms of that structure unless it stopped benefiting them. The norms of that structure were always going to stop benefiting Steve first, so he'd always be the weakest link in that regard. When Steve lost a lot of the power he had in '86 to aggressively seize control of things, he resorted to passive(-aggressive) avoidance. That had worked once before, after all: leaving after Frontiers and returning for Raised on Radio had given Steve a TON of leverage. But things were different now, and he couldn't simply avoid that fact anymore.

Thus, the divorce! Which Steve made out quite well with, and made Herbie treat him like an evil ex-wife that cleaned him out in court ever since (Herbie also called him a "pimp" making the band work the streets for him, but like. Eew. Also a bit of projection 'cause Herbie was the one working the band to death before). Not to say it wasn't also a display of Steve's more petty/vindictive side: it was almost as if he was saying, "oh, you want to tour for the rest of your life, huh? I'll make sure you HAVE to".

In the end, then, Steve did win against Herbie, which he used to very much want to do: but it was a pyrrhic victory. He won some kind of vindication, perhaps, and a continued source of income, but at the cost of the relationships that made the band work to begin with-- and one relationship, in particular, that Steve had been obsessed with on some level since the fucking 70s. He also learned, the hard way, that he wasn't "special" in the sense that he could re-orient the structure of the band to suit him first and foremost.

One of the tragedies of the Steve and Journey story, to me, is about the pitfalls of assimilation: it always seems like the safer choice, and on an individual level it can work out, but you end up hurting and betraying others like you that aren't as easily able to assimilate in the process. There's a poison at the heart of that choice, even if it's simpler or makes things easy in various ways. On a community-wide scale or larger it always ends up in throwing as many people under the bus as you can so you don't get run over. When the answer should be: work with those around you to stop the fucking bus!

(Also pour one out for poor Smitty and Ross. Having to be in the crossfire of the craziest band drama since Fleetwood Mac not once but TWICE.)

[cardiaccat]

fic trop mash asks!!

cj/bryce: 48 and 80

bryce/andy: 27 and 85

<3 <3

Fanfiction trope mashup

Hiiiii Carmen <3

CJ/Bryce fake dating + green eyed epiphany (I had to look up what that was because I had never heard of it before lol but now I know! Anyways)

So for this one im thinking one of them lost a bet or something. Because that's the only way I can think of that they'd be in this situation and still be NFL players (unless this is also a non NFL players au but meh) so roll with me here. They get invited to this party because that's also a part of the bet I guess.

Things are a little awkward at first. Yes, they've been friends since middle school. Shouldn't they just fall into their old routines? Eventually they do, but it takes time. This is the first time they've really been together since before the draft (CJ was off galavanting while Bryce had to put his nose to the grindstone). They try not to focus on their careers being the absolute antithesis of each other. Besides, CJ is seemingly overeager to play the role of Bryce's "boyfriend".

Now, CJ's always been the more tactile person in their relationship. Playfully pushing Bryce around at camps. Aggressively dabbing him up. Going in for one or two hugs and letting the last one linger a bit too long. So, when CJ's slinging his arm around Bryce's neck-a weight that's hauntingly familiar- it's nothing out of the ordinary. But, at the same time, it feels wildly different. Maybe it's because they're surrounded by people: teammates, friends, and strangers alike. Maybe it's because Bryce knows this is all for show. Either way, he can't quite put his finger on it.

Later on that night, they're cuddled up together on the couch. Once again CJ's arm has found itself looped around Bryce's shoulders. CJ is happily yammering on with his fellow party goers. Bryce focuses on CJ's voice, letting the rest of the noise fade into the background.

He feels his eyelids get heavy and he starts to go in and out of consciousness. He lays his head down on CJ's chest, nuzzling into his neck. Before he drifts off completely, CJ brings his head down and places a gentle kiss on Bryce's forehead. CJ's hand softly caresses his arm, threatening to make Bryce fall asleep even faster. Y'know. For the bit.

"aw, are you getting tired, B?" CJ says, a faint teasing tone to his voice. And that- more than the kiss, more than the arm caress- kick-starts something in Bryce's chest. Suddenly, he doesn't want this to be pretend anymore. He wants it to be real.

For what seems like half their lives, they've been intertwined in some way. Why not make it one more?

---------------------------------------------------

Bryce/Andy 27 & 80, sick/injured fic + innocent physical contact

There's been a bug going around the locker room. The O-line room, to be specific. But that doesn't stop Bryce from falling I'll with the same thing.

It starts with a cough after their last game of the season. It was good they were able to leave things on such a high note because now? Now, Bryce is wondering what that feels like because he's stuck in this hell.

The bedsheets stab at his skin and make it feel like he's burning alive, so he casts them aside in the hopes that it'd bring him some relief. There's a dull ache in his skull, the beginnings of headache forming. His joints are sore and seem like they're swollen, even if they don't look like it. Bryce swallows experimentally; no pain follows. Well, at least he's spared that.

He finishes cataloging his symptoms and pries himself off the bed. Bryce's shifting causes Andy to move. The older man mumbles something in his sleep but otherwise seems undisturbed. Seeing him settle, Bryce turns and gingerly pads to the bathroom. Each step causes his the ache in his muscles to deepen, but he pushes onward.

Eventually, he clambers back into bed. He covers himself with only the top sheet. Anything more and he's convinced he'll actually burn alive. It takes awhile for him to get comfortable, but sleep manages to overtake him.

It feels like no time at all has passed when suddenly he's being shaken awake by Andy. Blearily, Bryce opens his eyes. What greets him is Andy leering over him, concern etched on his face. Fire licks at his skin.

"Are you okay? You were groaning in your sleep," Andy says, the same concern that is on his face seeps into his voice.

"M'fine," Bryce mumbles back, covering his face with his forearm. The sunlight that's now streaming into the room is making his eyes hurt.

"You sound like shit."

Bryce doesn't respond. He huffs and turns to lay on his side, hoping to go back to sleep- however fitful it might be. Andy decides he doesn't like that nonanswer and flips the younger man over so he's on his back again.

"Hey! What the-" Bryce is cut off as the cooling sensation of the back of Andy's hand on his forehead gives him the relief he's been craving. A contented sigh leaves his throat as he leans into Andy's touch.

"Geez, Bryce, you're burning up," the older man comments, moving his hand around Bryce's face. "You must've been this way for hours... Why didn't you tell me sooner?"

"Cuz I didn't wanna wake you."

"C'mon, Kid," Andy sighs. He removes his hand from Bryce's skin and gets up. Bryce almost wants to whine at the loss of contact.

Andy comes back a few minutes later with some pills and a glass of water. Bryce props himself up and dutifully takes the Tylenol from Andy. He pops them into his mouth and takes a swig of water. He quickly downs the whole glass without even realizing it.

"Alright, easy there tiger," Andy chuckles as Bryce wipes the remaining drops from his lips. Andy moves to his side of the bed and climbs in. He then opens his arms, an invitation for Bryce to come closer.

Bryce accepts the offer, shifting over to Andy's side. The older man encapsulates him in a hug and they slide deeper under the covers. Bryce lays his hand down on Andy's chest. His steady heartbeat lulls him to sleep.

[didyoulookforme]

heeey b, are u still writing for the love triangule w matty n george? i loved it so so much would love some fluff 🥹

love love love ur writing and love youuuu ♥️

hi hi hi <333

thanks so much for stopping by!

i haven't written for them in so long :((( but fun fact, they were my first fan fic venture ever lol. the spin the bottle blurb was the first thing i ever wrote back in 2023, before this blog existed.

here's something silly (and not flushed out) that's been in my drafts since a year and a bit ago...

“someone had a bad day, huh?” you look up from your book as matty walks through the front door of your shared flat. poor thing. he looks exhausted, hair sticking out in every direction, jumper messily hanging on his frame, dark circles under his eyes. must’ve been a long session at the studio.

he kicks off his dirty trainers, mindlessly tossing them into the corner and nearly knocking over the lamp lighting the room.

“hey! watch it.”

a muffled “sorry” escapes his lips before he drops onto the other side of the sofa, slouching down until the cushions nearly swallow him whole.

“so, are you going to tell me what’s going on with you, or…?”

“don’t wanna talk about it, really.” his hands cover his face, making it difficult to read his expression.

“hmm, not sure that’s gonna work for me.” you put your book down on the coffee table, turning to face him, your foot nudging his leg. “what is it, matty? what happened?”

he exhales deeply before finally meeting your gaze. “it’s a bit hard to have a nice day when your daft ex-boyfriend keeps reminding me of how good you felt under him.”

“…you're fucking joking.” that catches you off guard. yes, you’d dated george, but that was two years ago. not exactly something you like to think about on a frequent basis. “i’d really appreciate it if my sex life wasn’t the subject of discussion with your bandmates. or anyone else, for that matter.”

“he fucking started it!” sure he did. you shuffle, crossing your arms.

“he got upset that i didn’t like one of his drum fills and started reminding me that you two used to, y’know, be a thing. and once he gets going, he cannot fuck off because he knows i hate it when he runs his mouth about you and him.”

oh, how easy he makes it for you to antagonize him.

“…are you jealous, healy?” his eyes go wide.

he loves to pretend he’s tough, but you know better. the smug grin and daily cocky attitude don’t fool you in the slightest. underneath it all, he’s got a soft heart, even if he refuses to admit it. boys will be boys, after all.

“what? why would i be jealous of him?” that last word practically burns his tongue. “he’s a prick, and i don’t even like him half the time. i just put up with him because i need a drummer, and he’s the only decent one i’ve found.” again, sure. like they haven't been best mates for years now.

you just stare at him. he stares back. neither of you say anything.

and then, the silence cracks him wide open.

“ugh. fine. yes.” he throws his arms up in defeat, even though you haven’t muttered a single word. “yes, i’m jealous. i’m the jealous boyfriend. there, i said it. happy now?”

you try to keep a straight face, but the way your lips curl at the corners instantly gives you away.

“you’re being a brat, matty. an adorable one, but still a brat.”

“is that supposed to make me feel better? ’cos it’s not, y’know.” always a drama queen, but you secretly love it.

you kneel in front of him, taking his hands in yours. “yes, i shagged george, and nothing can change that.” the look of disgust on his face is priceless. “but if you haven’t noticed, i’m with you now. we live together.” you gesture vaguely around the flat. “and you’re the one i have sex with. not him. so there’s that.” you kiss the top of his head before settling beside him on the couch.

a heavy breath leaves his body, making him relax a little. “i know. i just fuckin’ hate him sometimes. and i get worried that…” his voice quivers. “that you’ll get tired of me and leave. go back to him.”

he buries his head in the crook of your neck, seeking comfort, and your heart clenches because, god, he’s ridiculous.

“matty. you know i love you, right?” he nods slowly against your shoulder.

“and you know damn well we’re probably going to fuck after this.”

that earns a quiet laugh.

“so please, don’t let george drive you mad, okay? otherwise, you’re going to end up strangling your drummer, and then i won’t get to see you this jealous and tease you anymore.”

you can’t help it, but to make up for it, you press a quick peck to his cheek, reassuring him he has absolutely nothing to worry about.

[jessconsumesmedia]

Ghosts 4x12 It's The End of the World as We Know it and What Were We Talking About?

Wow that is a long title. I really like it though so it works out. Okay, wow, I am immediately off topic this is my silly little(not) analysis essay thing. I have decided that I write these for me but for the few who enjoy this kinda deal sorry it is late lol. (There will be more but maybe I won't actually be caught up until hiatus)

I really loved this episode so I am very glad I finally got enough time to be able to write about it!

Yummy Spoilers under the table! (This implies they are on the floor?)

First off they really ate with this episode and not just the food in the restaurant. (I am so sorry that was a bad pun I'm done) I really enjoyed all of the parts of the episode and I went a little cray at the whole H-Money Power Friends deal. So be prepared for a lot of talking about that :)

The Opening of Jay's Restaurant

(I want to eat there really bad) To be so honest I just loved this whole bit. Jay is finally getting to live his dream of owning a restaurant and I love that the opening seemed to be pretty full of diners. I know the fact that it seems like they can't decide whether the BnB is successful or not is a complaint I have heard, (and I am sure it is one I will hear about the restaurant also) but it doesn't seem odd to me to be honest. Like all businesses have times when they aren't busy, and the BnB is still technically a newer business. With most businesses you have to be prepared not to turn a profit for years and I don't think they are so far from that timeline that it causes a plot hole. (Which again whatever is funniest is probably always going to take precedent it is a comedy)

Jay's staff being amalgamations of the ghosts makes me laugh

The End of the World?

Flowers part in the restaurant opening or her part in trying to stop the restaurant opening is amazing. As the viewers we basically live through Sam in this situation because so many people forget that Flower is really smart she just died in an unfortunate state. Flower was in a tough spot with when she joined the cult it was something for her to be attached too that allowed her to remain checked out in some shape or form. She has her moments but she isn't stupid and I am really glad we got to see Sam react to her mistake in real time. Sam deserves to yell at the ghosts sometimes. And to be fair they need it along with the boundaries that comes with.

Hetty and Trevor Once Again Try to Murder Me

HETTY AND TREVER?!???! When I first started watching this episode I honestly kind of thought that they would immediately fall back into bed with each other. Which I wouldn't have been mad at, but the way they managed to put them in a situation that sets them up perfectly for a classic sitcom slow-burn just makes my tv loving heart happy. Like I am genuinely giggling and kicking my feet at these little goofies. (using this phrase out of spite) They are going to cause so many problems as power friends.

So I am deeming this good enough cause I want to post it but I am sure I have so many other thoughts and also I probably left thoughts in the dust (I did not re read) but I need this out of my drafts.

-Jess🤑

[unitchiefs-blackbirdphoenix]

CME 17x06 Reaction/Spoilers Pt. 2 (The Jemily Ep)

Had to split into a second part lol. The first part is here. (thanks once again @blackbirdsaltzman!)

JJ not wanting Emily to quit :(

Luke speaking Spanish! Luke speaking Spanish! I called it for this season!

Omg Luke saying he still loves Penelope 😭😭😭

"Dating a coworker is a bad idea" omg

Rossi and Voit again

Video games? Hmm

Quest games?

Idk a lot of shit about conspiracy theories but do video games really help structure them?

Jade and Damien are searching for clues...

Voit's so done with him haha

"North Star is where it all starts"

"when you're lost and desperate and on a quest. all you want is something to connect the dots."

Jade and Damien might want to blame this North Star

Stuart House possibly was used to create serial killers... huh.

I mean, he's not wrong. A profile is an educated guess.

Yoo wtf Gasper

Back at the Stuart House

Dang Tyler

Luke and Tyler about movies! Omg I might actually like this beginning of a possibly beautiful friendship lol

"Hoo-ah!" Luke my boy! They're totally going to have movie marathons together now after that case hahahaha

Jemily scene #4 🥰😭👀🥺 (I have so many thoughts on this that it deserves a completely separate post)

I fucking called it! Chopsticks is now a jemily thing!!

Omg wait

Jemily is now officially cheetobreath stoner X salt and vinegar chip stoner (+chopsticks as their child 🥰)!!!

JJ's still so far gone lol "These are brilliant" as she's playing with her chopsticks

"All those years with cheesy fingers?" and the little mind-blown🤯 is so cute. JJ learning it from Emily now ahhh

"Shit. What was I talking about?" JJ swearing again yesss hahaha

"Gideon, Hotch, what do they have in common?" They're all men. Oh. That works too.

"They left. The two of us, we were kicked out." I honestly thought JJ was going to say "fucking kicked out" here ngl

"we're still here, Emily. We are stronger than anyone gives us credit for" oh 🥺

JJ finally getting fed up with Emily saying she'll quit. She doesn't want Emily to quit 🥺

"I didn't quit on you in Paris." Paris mention! Also ouch.

"You didn't quit on me after my miscarriage" "Oh, god damn it" Double ouch!! And JJ's voice shaking when she says it omg 😭😭

So Emily canonically knows about JJ's miscarriage then. I got a little one shot if you want to read it hehe (may be another on the way...)

"This job takes a lot, but you know what it gives? It gives me... y-you" oh FUCK 😭😭😭 my heart!!

Shipping or not, this is such a powerful moment for JJ and Emily. And this whole scene was definitely also a huge fuck you to CBS and a nod to what AJ and Paget went through in season 6 behind the scenes with the network. I highly recommend listening to AJ and Paget's podcast eps in Michael Kahan's "Funny in Failure" on youtube or anywhere you listen to podcasts on.

And yes, I got a whole lotta thoughts behind this scene.

"I'll support you, I will. Always." Omg JJ 😭😭😭

The way JJ looks at Emily before looking away and starting to cry aaaahhh 😭 and Emily looking at JJ 🥺 god I love this ship so much!! You can never take away their relationship and special connection from me or JJ or Emily, no matter how hard you try!

"Oh shit, it's Rossi" another shit from JJ haha

Emily deciding she'll stay bc of JJ. For JJ's sake 🥺 fuuuuuck I love them so goddamn much

“Grab your keys, let’s fucking roll” ok love JJ and Emily swearing in the same scene hahaha

JJ's "yes!" hahaha she's like "I knew it would work"

"I can't- I can't drive" lol "Rideshare?" There's a missing scene in the rideshare car ride huh?

Omg not the howl 😭

I seriously feel like they're trying to set Luke and Teresa up

Lol not JJ chugging down water 😭😭 she's still out of it

Also girly how are you fully standing right now??

JJ trying to focus but she's still "wooo" like she was trying to focus on the papers in Emily's hands

Not her shaking it off when Emily hands them to her omg. AJ thank you for that

So Gideon and Rossi were working on drafts for this assignment of the study of serial killers, a hypothetical scenario

Isolation in worse conditions.... controlled and directed?

But who would else would know about Gold Star?

"North Star is us, the BAU."

Oof the last shot of the team (and Tyler ig) being a "star" around the roundtable ooooh

And that's it! Also request to have more high/stoned jemily content for future seasons??

[rightpastnowhere]

POV, LAST and NEXT for the writing ask game?

hiiiiiii i can always count on you in my ask box with writing games <3

in the time its taken me to respond to this after the other inbox prompt, i actually started working on something new lmfao, which is just a silly one shot where i throw my desire to be comforted after a closing shift onto vex so i can have percy comfort her <3

LAST:

He glances at the rough-hewn analog clock hanging on the wall — an old gift he made for Vex, one of his first clocks, that she’d brought when moving in — to see that it’s about 10:25pm. Vex’s shift ended at ten, but he’s not incredibly concerned; she usually gets out late, either finishing her own task or helping someone else, and the commute itself is fifteen minutes by Vex’s… well-loved (nearly falling apart) motorcycle. 

NEXT:

It’s after about half an hour when he’s broken again from his fixated haze of concentration by Trinket — Vex’s very fluffy, very large, and overall very grizzly bear-like dog — heaving up from where he’s been laying against Percy’s legs. 

POV:

(for context, vex hasn't actually shown up in the draft of the work one-shot yet, so i'm gonna skip ahead a bit in my outline)

"Hello, Trinket," Vex murmurs as she walks through the door to her precious dog's wide grin and wagging tail. She kicks off her shoes, letting them clatter randomly in the entryway with every intent to arrange them neatly letter. She lets her bag fall from her barely-mustered grasp to give the boy some scratches behind the ears, tiredly mussing the fur around his jaw like Vax always does.

He trails after her happily as she drifts towards the couch, which she collapses onto face-first as soon as she's within range. The last of the tension from the past nine hours finally relents, and she feels all of her muscles finally relax.

"Well, Trinket, it seems like your mother has fallen victim to the couch once again." Percy's voice is muffled by the throw pillow her face has sunken into, but not enough to mask the fond, faux-dramatic tone that she adores so much. She lifts a heavy hand to flip him off upside down, and he laughs openly in a way that he really only does at home (or when he's drunk).

Two hands pick up her legs where she'd left them hanging off of the edge of the couch, and gently move them to rest fully atop the cushions. There's a dip in the middle seat as Percy joins her, and then he softly takes the hand and folds her middle finger back down before pressing a light kiss to her knuckles.

"I won't bother asking how work was," he says dryly, and Vex laughs into the pillow.

(i just spat that out into the tumblr text editor because it's late and i'm not going for perfection lol. i hope you enjoy vex participating in my nightly routine, except i don't have a percy, i just have two cats that i scoop up against their will to give them hugs <3)

no excuses writing meme

[the-one-who-lambs]

Ask Game 2. and 5.: Which of your fics is your pride and joy, and What’s something you learned while researching a fic? :)

At the risk of sounding conceited, I'm proud of everything I've written. Even with regards to the ones that aren't as "polished," especially my earlier fics, I'm still proud of them because I was relearning how to write narrative stories (rather than poetry) after about 4 years of not writing fic. Everything I've written and shared has been an important part of developing my skill and creative choices thus far. If I had to pick one, though, it may be recency bias, but I am very happy that The Risen Lamb and the Fallen God is turning out well. It has been an absolute blast to revisit this and give it the "director's cut" version I feel it needed and to develop it over a much longer period of time.

I'll be completely honest about the fact that this has absolutely not always been the case. I used to pay attention to my hit count pretty closely enough that I would check it weekly or twice a week, and when readership kinda lagged I got worried that my writing wasn't interesting enough or some nonsensical shit like that. I finally kicked this habit like a year and a half ago-- I remember it was a month or two after I'd finished writing The Care and Keeping of Eldritch Gods and I was wondering why I wasn't getting as many reads as before until beloved friend and beta reader @surfdudeboy had to tell me "hey yeah so that's because you finished a big writing project that had people following it consistently." And then I realized how fucking ridiculous it was to worry about it in the first place lol. Once I realized how anxious it was making me, I nipped that shit in the bud. And when I did, I stopped worrying so much about a ton of other things regarding my own writing, too.

Sometimes I notice that this old habit tries to resurface, but I'm definitely good about stopping it in its tracks before I start caring about that again. Nowadays, it doesn't really bother me any longer than like... a day, usually when I'm writing a first draft and agonizing over the fact that it's messy due to the fact that it is a first draft. Recent example: I was kinda embarrassed a month or two ago about the old version of Risen/Fallen having 3x the reads that my newer, much improved version has. Anyway I forget who it was but someone basically reminded me "hey it has more reads because you published it like 2 months after the game came out and it's been up for longer." And it felt so obvious, but sometimes being self-conscious (even jokingly) makes you forget or overlook things that normally would be obvious. Anyway, it was an extremely effective reminder. Pretty much instantly stopped caring about it.

For all the confidence I used to lack in the "frequently comparing myself to what I've already done using some arbitrary standard that doesn't even meaningfully measure my growth as a writer anyway" department... I am so fucking glad that my particular anxiety has never really extended to comparing myself to others. I've done that before sometimes, but not really for anything that I do for fun like writing. Sometimes I forget that's a thing that happens in fandom but it absolutely sucks all the joy out of creating. There were a couple times that I think I was almost slipping into that thought pattern, but I caught it pretty quickly, so nothing came of it.

I have to remind myself every once in a while, and sometimes a friend will notice before I do (in which case they know they can straight up tell me "hey Hannah what you just said was stupid as shit"), but it's been very worth it. I realized a week or so ago how little I've been worrying about my progress/ability/skill/etc as a writer over the past few months-- something I didn't realize until now because it's not bothering me and therefore not really on my mind at all-- but oh my god was that an absolute relief. Taking pride in my work is a constant effort, but it's an important part of intrinsic self-motivation for me. Overall, I'm very happy with where I am right now, creatively! I've made a lot of progress, and I'm excited to see how I can continue to grow in the future.

Anyway something I've learned while researching for a fic is that cats have barbed dicks.

[user1286]

Ok. Oh my god. I. I just realized something. I don’t think I ever updated on why I suddenly stopped posting for a while. UH. I basically made this big old post explaining everything and. I genuinely thought I posted it. Turns out, It’s been in my drafts for MONTHS. I NEVER POSTED MY APOLOGY AND EXPLANATION. UH I’m just gonna make this quick atp, bc I feel so bad, bc I KNOW there are people who were pr interested in my Gods of Disappointment fic, and then I just ghosted you. Uhhhh if you have no clue what I’m talking abt, and are not interested, feel free to not care lol, but for those who do, feel free to continue :3

First of all, I am so sorry for literally just disappearing on that. It’s not that I lost my passion and hyperfixation on it, in fact, I’d say it’s EXPANDED in a way I never even thought it would. But it’s just more so, I actually lost like, my confidence in my writing, bc the 4th chapter came out so bad, and I wanted to rewrite it, but I kept messing it up so many times and just. Omg. And now, the thing is, I’ve found a way write it out better, it’s just, I ended up wanting to write an actual story with this and not just a fan fic, like good god, my perfectionism has never been this bad.

REGARDLESS. I really do want to explain my idea of this story, bc I have SO MUCH MOAR TO SHOW. I’m just bad at it in like storytelling 😭😭😭 So I have an idea, and I’d like some input if u big old sillybillies don’t mind :3

What if I just made infodump posts where I’d update old ideas, and like show everything up until the end of the story, and just continue on with my other ideas for the aftermath (it’s developed so fucking much, u guys have NO clue, my autism and adhd have gone off the RAILS with this hyperfixation😭), and IF I manage to get the time(bc of school, they like to kick my ass), confidence in writing, and actually develop my skills, I’ll actually write out the fic, and the new chapter when I actually manage to not be a shy little bitch.

ONCE AGAIN, I am SO sorry for literally vanishing😭

[devoted-horror]

hiii the motivation to write hasnt been motivating and i don't have anything in my drafts ready to post yet so instead here is me rambling on whether or not i think a relationship would work out between me nd certain slashers bc idk. im bored. and i like rambling abt silly things. nd only like... 4 of these r answered in full seriousness so.

starting off strong w michael myers uhm.... he's the ideal relationship for me, i fear.... which is funny bc i never think abt him but i have an avoidant attachment style and he would expect literally nothing from me :thumbs up: there would b no need for intimacy or anything like that it would just b a thing that exists nd never gets acknowledged.

jason voorhees..... idk im uber scared of drowning so i cant even picture getting anywhere near crystal lake bc i'd be scared that i'd fall in lol but. perhaps... i've only seen a small handful of the friday (the first one, goes to hell, x, the jared padalecki one, nd freddy v jason) and i've been far too unmotivated to watch the others but. he's interesting. i think a nice lil life away from people living in a cabin in the woods near a lake is nice to think about, but. idk.

amanda young.... i wanna say yes sosososo badly i could b so good to her but i would die and end up in her list of dead girlfriends i fear. i have a crush on her.

billy loomis is a no personally bc i've known people like him irl nd they make me wanna chew on 20 pieces of rotten tomatoes.

stu macher on the other hand.... i don't think it would b anything serious i think we'd pretend to date as a joke for the funny haha but then oh shit.... maybe it Isn't a joke.... drama happens amidst the ghostface murders.... think.... pretty little liars but better.

bubba and thomas go hand in hand here as a sad no bc i cannot stand hot weather and you wouldn't catch me in the middle of nowhere texas unless something was Very Wrong.

asa emory is a hard no. i hate bugs. i have a fear of bugs. a ladybug or butterfly comes near me and im screaming and running away, and that is not an exaggeration. also bc i have the biggest crush on arkin thts my bbygirl right there guys asa simply stands no chance i fear

quinn bailey.... i don't think it would work out but would i still try.... probably.... i love her sm.

mark hoffman is also a no bc like... idk... he's just not my type.

ethan landry pre-reveal is a yes he's so pathetic coded it has me giggling nd kicking my feet just thinking abt him but post-reveal... probs not.

corey cunningham has me biting my fist because i wanna say yes so badly he is so near nd dear to my heart and i just Know the bastard wld b stupidly romantic nd wld never even think abt cheating nd shit like tht right but also like... it would be overwhelming. like i said, avoidant attachment style, i'd feel suffocated. but it's a nice thought.

bo sinclair. i have.... such a crush on this man... i want to say yes because of that alone, but i simply cannot. there would be fights 24/7 and honestly just turn me into wax already man bc he'd give me a headache.

vincent sinclair would be a yes, i think, if only bo weren't around. it's mean of me to say but vincent doesn't leave town, so in order to be in a relationship with him, i'd have to stay in ambrose as well and deal with bo and once again i cannot.

lester sinclair is an immediate yes under the assumption that he doesn't live in down, but rather on the outskirts of it. nice fuckin cabin in the woods with wicked wooden carvings nd funky animals bones and a dog?? honestly sign me up.

brahms heelshire, as much as i love him and as much as he was the one to make me fall into the whole slasher x reader tag, is a no. again, avoidant attachment style. also, i can hardly take care of myself so there is no way i'd be able to take care of a full-grown man. besides, my cat comes first nd i don't think he'd like that too much.

tiffany valentine pls just one chance is all i ask. fuck it just one date man i'll make it the best date ever pls pls pls

charles lee ray is a no bc he's not my type tbh.

jesse cromeans is also a no. i don't have an explanation for this one i just. idk. it's a no from me.

this isn't every slasher (obviously) nd def not all tht i write for here but i ran out of things to say. so. rambling ends here.