#on-screen lovers and off-screen besties

[iamnotcreativeijustplayitontv]

This is one of the things I love most about some of the shows I watch. I also love when family members play family members (such as Kate Hewlett and David Hewlett as Jeannie Miller and Rodney McKay - best sibling dynamic I think I've ever seen on TV - in Stargate Atlantis), because it just adds another level to the performances that you wouldn't otherwise get.

on-screen lovers and off-screen besties is literally the best dynamic ever

[poorly-drawn-mdzs]

A lasting impression

[First] Prev <–-> Next

[5sospenguinqueen]

Emotional Range Of A Teaspoon | Pierre Gasly

Summary: What right does he have to feel angry at the sight of Y/N and Charles? The answer is none. After all, she's only his best friend. Isn't she?

Warnings: Swearing. Angst. Fluff. Jealousy. One suggestive comment

No faceclaim but British reader. 2024 timeline

F1 Masterlist

Requested: Yes (sorry it's a little late)

This one actually comes with a tiny text paragraph mid-way through

━━━━ ༻𖥸༺ ━━━━

Replies to @ PierreGASLY

Charles_Leclerc c’mon mate, it’s only been two days 

→ PierreGASLY a whole lifetime 

→ ItsYN i can’t even remember what you look like 

→ Charles_Leclerc and the people say that i am the dramatic one 

AlpineF1Team think you can channel that pain into some points this weekend?

→ PierreGASLY why aren’t you taking my pain seriously 

→ AlpineF1Team do you want us to schedule you an appointment with the counsellor?

→ ItsYN i don’t think that counsellor gets paid enough to listen to him

User1 ouch, talk about friendzoned 

→ User2 no, no, they’re in the denial stage of their friends to lovers arc

Replies to @ ItsYN

PierreGASLY i can still hear your voice

→ PierreGASLY although i’m glad you’re not making me suffer through the lost boys again

→ ItsYN okay first off, you love that movie. and second, because of that, i’m telling everyone you cried watching cars 3

→ PierreGASLY traitor!

→ LiamLawson30 as any man would!

Charles_Leclerc don’t worry y/n, i’ll have movie night with you 

→ ItsYN are you going to make me watch harry potter again?

→ Charles_Leclerc yes..?

→ ItsYN @ PierreGASLY come back please 

Replies to @ Charles_Leclerc

User3 not charles tweeting this the day after the canadian gp. y/n missed the canadian gp and you can tell poor charles had to hear all about it 

ItsYN we all know i would be the soldier and pierre would be the doting housewife crying on the platform 

→ PierreGASLY and i would look radiant doing so

Max33Verstappen he wouldn’t shut up about her during the driver’s parade. i tried to walk off and he followed me!

→ PierreGASLY i was in the middle of a sentence!

→ danielricciardo mate you know it’s bad when yapstappen needs you to stop talking

ItsYN stop talking about me. you're making it sound like we're friends

→ Charles_Leclerc excuse me but you know you want to be my bestie

→ PierreGASLY you can’t have her. she’s mine. i saw her first. shotgun or whatever you monagasques say for dibs 

→ GeorgeRussell63 actually i saw her first; her brother was my teammate when we were kids so 

→ PierreGASLY and just for that, i’m unfollowing you 

━━━━ ༻𖥸༺ ━━━━

Replies to @ CHICKEN!!

User4 whoever took this photo needs to go straight to jail. not y’all making it seem like charles and y/n are a sneaky item

User5 i knew she was shady, talking about how she couldn't make it only to end up in the winning driver’s garage 

PierreGASLY oh 

→ User6 wait no, pierre, come back. look at other tweets about this please

User7 stop being a shit stirrer. he’s literally got his other arm wrapped around alex ‘cause he was guiding the two of them through a ton of fans but that’s conveniently been cropped out 

Replies to @ BRAKKEEE

User8 i can’t believe people were trying to convince us ynarles was real when it’s clearly ynex

User9 love that charles was literally only there to keep them safe from fans and after that they were like ‘you’re done babe. now we run off into the sunset’ 

User10 watching him chase after them was so funny tho because he was literally yelling “let me play too” 

Replies to @ ItsYN

User11 oh no, we’re so sorry. we were just so happy to see you 

→ User12 yeah and pierre would’ve been happy to see her as well if you hadn’t blasted her all over the internet 

→ User13 pierre didn't exactly look all that happy though. he wouldn’t stop glaring at poor charles  

→ User12 maybe because you guys made it seem like his best friend lied to him to be with charles

Thumb aimlessly swiping at the screen of his phone, Pierre scanned the tweets as they passed, making note of a cute waffle shop in Monaco that he knew Y/N would love. Nothing of note appeared to have been posted as most of the Grid were waiting to hear where Sainz had signed. Hand halting, Pierre’s eyes flickered across the screen once. Twice. And then a third time just to be sure. His last message to Y/N had gone unanswered and now there was a picture of her on Twitter, claiming to be from today. With Charles’ arm around her. His teeth sank into his bottom lip, and a derisive scoff filled his driver’s room. What happened to being unable to book the time off work, he thought bitterly to himself. Instead she was in the Paddock with a red-clad arm wrapped around her. Before he could restrain himself, he had clicked on the ‘reply’ button. A knock at the door pulled him from his downward spiral, preventing him from looking further into the comments gushing about how cute his best friend and closest F1 friend looked as a couple. 

“Pierre, time to warm up.”

“D’accord.”

He locked his phone before dumping it onto the massage table, storming out of his driver’s room, unaware that if he had scrolled down another two posts, he would’ve seen a picture of Y/N with Alexandra and a tweet from the woman herself. 

━━━━ ༻𖥸༺ ━━━━

ItsYN just posted

liked by alexandrasaintmleux, estebanocon and others

ItsYN an amazing weekend in barcelona watching my best friend do his thing and achieve some well-deserved points. a huge thank you to charles and alex for helping me sneak into the paddock last-minute tagged: pierregasly, charles_leclerc and alexandrasaintmleux 

553 comments

alpinef1team our favourite things rolled into one post 

→ ItsYN mine too! 

→ User1 sis, get off the floor 

estebanocon should i be offended that you wearing my cap didn’t make the post 

→ ItsYN shh i can’t have my people thinking i have friends other than pear 

danielricciardo PIERRE GASSLLLYYYYY

→ ItsYN go thirst over him on his posts. my insta is a 310 free zone

→ danielricciardo just admit that you’re jealous of our love and move on

→ ItsYN was he publicly crying over missing YOU? i don’t think so 

→ danielricciardo that’s because i’m a better friend than you and i’ve been here the whole time

→ ItsYN blocked 

alexandrasaintmleux thank you for trusting me with the surprise! 

→ ItsYn thank you for being so wonderful and helping 🩷 (and stopping charles from throttling me)

→ charles_leclerc it’s because you wouldn’t stop saying thank you and asking me if i was “sure that it’s no bother” to help you 

→ It’sYN sorry for being considerate! 

User2 not to be that person but has anyone else noticed that pierre hasn’t commented?

→ User3 i'm getting the feeling that, despite all his online complaining, he wasn’t overly excited to see his best friend this weekend? 

━━━━ ༻𖥸༺ ━━━━

User4 not the f1wags posting her, they know the truth

→ User5 what truth. it doesn’t look they’re even friends anymore

User7 it’s the way she looks like she’s trying to explain/talk to him and he’s just yelling at her 

→ User8 i used to root for them to get together but now that he’s yelled at her :/

User9 y/n is stronger than me because if a man pointed his finger like that at me, i’d savagely bite it off 

User10 uh, who does he think he is talking to y/n l/n that way

User11 i bet it’s because he thought y/n was there for charles and got jealous 

→ User12 i’ve connected the dots

→ User13 you ain’t connected shit

━━━━ ༻𖥸༺ ━━━━

User14 idk which one i want to be more

→ User15 that’s because you want to be their third instead 

User16 i’m thirsty. anyone else thirsty

LandoNorris oh god my eyes

→ danielricciardo this is why you should stop looking at x rated things on the internet 

→ User17 what happened to your pr training?

→ Charles_Leclerc what happened to pierre’s?

User18 if only he could transfer this kind of passion onto the track 

User19 uh, the clarity of the third one?? did admin take this and then leak it online? 

→ AlpineF1Team i'm afriad that we’re finding out along with you guys but we’re not gonna pretend like we weren’t rooting for this 

ItsYN why am i trending on twitter?

━━━━ ༻𖥸༺ ━━━━

ItsYN just posted

liked by alexandrasaintmleux, lilymhe and others

ItsYN my little pain au chocolat 💕

845 comments

pierregasly we talked about you calling me pastries 

→ ItsYn yes, we did. and i didn’t take into account anything you said

→ pierregasly you are very lucky you're cute

→ ItsYN it's gotten me far in life

User1 talk about a hard launch

→ User2 they weren’t really given the choice considering they were caught snogging all over barcelona last weekend

alpinef1team pierre repping the alpine colours 

→ ItsYN release your chokehold on my man

→ alpinef1team no, you release your chokehold on our man 

→ ItsYN what happened to being supportive of this?

→ alpinef1team that was before all he did was yap about you!

lilymhe babe, this isn’t you. get up and come back to me 

→ ItsYN i’m sorry but i don’t think i can come back from this 

→ lilymhe what about us, what about everything we’ve been through

→ ItsYN you know i never wanted to hurt you

→ alex_albon @ pierregasly guess i’ll be seeing you at the next karaoke marathon 

→ pierregasly only if you sing breaking free with me

→ ItsYN this is why i love you

landonorris let’s take a moment for our fallen soldier… we lost an honourable brit to a french man

→ pierregasly it’s not my fault that i have charm and you don’t 

→ danielricciardo i didn’t realise charm meant having a tantrum when she asks your friend for help to surprise you 

→ pierregasly we agreed not to speak of that! 

→ ItsYN i don’t think you’re living this one down, macaron

charles_leclerc can you tell him to put his clothes back on, please

→ ItsYN i tried but he seems incapable of keeping them on around me

→ pierregasly charles is just jealous of my amazing physique 

→ charles_leclerc best you not talk about jealousy 

User4 @ ItsYN i love that they’ve not had a chance to pr train you yet

→ ItsYN never! 

User5 and they called me crazy when i said friends to lovers! 

→ ItsYN tbf hun, so did we. it took us a minute

→ User6 so pierre is slow on and off the track 

→ pierregasly hey! 

pierregasly just posted

liked by charles_leclerc, yukitsunoda0511 and others

pierregasly from movie nights to drunken karaoke, i would go on any adventure with you 

1,454 comments

ItsYN my best friend and my love 

→ alexandrasaintmleux i thought i was your best friend 

→ ItsYN i’m not allowed to post shirtless pics of you online though

→ charles_leclerc no you are not! 

→ User7 i hope pr never got ahold of her

→ alpinef1team she has an appointment with them on thursday

yukitsunoda0511 is this what they call simping?

→ pierregasly no

→ ItsYN yes

maxverstappen1 does this mean you’ll stop talking about her during driver’s parades?

→ pierregasly no 

→ yukitsunoda0511 he’ll just stop talking about whether she’s interested in any of us 

→ ItsYN he did that?

→ pierregasly no!

→ maxverstappen1 yes, the latest victim was logan

→ charles_leclerc actually i was the latest victim, and i will remain the most famous. my jealousy era is forever captured on the internet 

→ logansargeant @ pierregasly is that why you kept asking me what i thought about her?

landonorris you guys are kinda cute when you’re not yelling at her 

→ ItsYN please stop saying this. i'm the one who has to listen to him apologise over and over for the millionth time

→ pierregasly because i feel bad! 

→ ItsYN omg i know! 

danielricciardo mate, we get it. she’s your girl now but you can let go of her for two seconds. she’s not going to disappear

→ pierregasly it’s called a healthy attachment

→ ItsYN he says whilst cuddled into my neck and following me to the bathroom

lilymhe she’s so hot, drop me her @ please

→ pierregasly back off

→ ItsYN i’m right here bby girl. let me take out on a date 

→ charles_leclerc careful lily or he might start yelling at you next 

alpinef1team we’ve been asked by an anonymous source that you all refrain from discussing previous events. reparations have been made and it’s been advised that such an event remain in the past 

→ danielricciardo lol he ran to mom

→ landonorris anonymous source, my ass. just tag him

→ georgerussell63 this is so lame

→ alex_albon mate, this is more obvious than pierre’s jealousy 

→ charles_leclerc even i cannot support him through this 

→ ItsYN i love you, my little croissant, but i cannot pretend that this is normal

→ pierregasly ultimate betrayal

━━━━ ༻𖥸༺ ━━━━

Sorry if this wasn’t angst enough. Humour and fluff are more my forte.

As always, F1 requests open for the current grid and retired drivers.

Tag list

@peachiicherries @rosecentury

(A huge thank you to both of you for wanting to be added to all f1 posts. It means a lot)

[ktownshizzle]

Love & Lullabies | Part 4.5

✎ ˎˊ˗ Pairing: Min Yoongi x female Reader

✎ ˎˊ˗ Summary: What begins as a simple favor for your best friend Namjoon soon pulls you into the rhythms of Yoongi’s life—afternoons spent caring for his son, late nights filled with candid conversations, and a connection neither of you thought you needed. You’re just fresh out of a long-term relationship with an ex who didn’t want a family with you, so did you really just stumble into a life you’ve always dreamed of? (Thank god Namjoon isn’t the only one who’s clumsy.)

✎ ˎˊ˗ Alternatively: It’s 2025 and BTS is prepping for their comeback. All members seem to have gained muscle weight from their time at camp. But Min Yoongi has gained a different kind of weight—an 8-pound baby and a fuck-load of responsibility. (Thank god you’re there to help him.)

✎ ˎˊ˗ Genre: Fluff, Angst, Smut, idol!au, Acquaintances to Lovers, Reader is Namjoon’s bestie

✎ ˎˊ˗ Warnings: Yoongi is a DILF (!!!) That’s it.

✎ ˎˊ˗ Chapter warnings: porn with some plot kinda, this yoongi is very horny and is a very methodical masturbator (?) in the way he set the mood for himself (could be canon, amirite), let’s fix that boner you left him with, and let’s soothe your weary minds from that Dispatch article, POV switch after the article headline, idk if you know that one video of yoongi in d-day during the piano break in life goes on he does this thing with his tongue… it’s written in here somewhere

✎ ˎˊ˗ Word count: 1.5k

✎ ˎˊ˗ Posting date: December 15, 2024

✎ ˎˊ˗ A/N: Surprise! I kid you not, this was written within a span of like 8 hours? So if it sucks, that’s probably why, lol. Lucky for y’all I am too impatient to wait for notes milestones before I upload the next part, so here you go. 🎁 Also, @glossdebut, you know what you did. Enjoy, my lovelies~ 💕

Part One | Part Two | Part Three | Part Four |  Masterlist

“Fuck me…” Yoongi sighs, leaning further back into the computer chair. He runs both hands through his hair as the preliminary pinpricks of pleasure makes his cock spring to life under his sweatpants.

His phone is now propped on his half-empty coffee mug, of which the screen—maxed out in its brightness settings—is projecting the photo you sent through its 2x dynamic galaxy amoled display—of which his dick would personally like to thank his Samsung sponsors.

He is so horny he might just die if he doesn’t get off in the next five minutes. 

It’s your fault. Of course, it is.

God you’re so fucking sexy, do you even know that? Do you even realize what you do to him? He is literally about to masturbate in his multi-million won worth studio to the pitiful pixels you have afforded him with.

He stands up, curses you under his breath as he pulls his pants down to pool around his ankles. He drops to his chair, about to slip a clammy hand inside his boxers when he decides to adjust the view juuuust a little, zooming the photo closer…closer…  and that’s it.

Just the view he needs. (Sue him for having astigmatism.)

He grabs the aircon remote and adjusts the temp to a balmy 24 ‘cause it’d be hella annoying if he can’t get hard because his studio is an igloo.

Some velvety track with soft percussions filter out from his speakers.

A pump of lube from his hidden drawer, wet wipes at the ready for the inevitable clean up, and he’s off to the fuckin’ races. 

His fist wraps the base of his cock, coating his entire shaft with the gel. It's cold, but it immediately warms up to his body temperature as his palm slides up and down his semi. 

Greedy eyes rake your body on his phone screen. Your tits. They’re a vision. He can see just the ghost of your nipples, peaking in the slightest way against your silky top and suddenly his mouth is dry. What would they look like if they’re not hiding from him? For sure they’re puffy. Pretty jet-puffed marshmallows that he’s gonna be putting in his mouth and sucking until you’re falling apart and creaming with just that. He smirks. Yeah, he could do that.

He tugs at his cock faster, licking his bottom lip as he imagines the texture of your pebbled nipples against his tongue. He shivers, increasing the pace of his ministrations, cock now fully hard.

Back to the photo.

Huh. You knew what you were doing—squeezing your breast with your hand. The way the mound of flesh is about to spill over, and your areola is just kissing the edge of the fabric is actually killing him. It’s diabolical. Pure torture.

Had you been here, he’s scooping out that breast, the one you’re holding out to him, so it’s hanging generously from your top, wobbling as he bounces you on his fat dick. 

He feels his eyes crossing, caught in the spell of the hypnotic movements playing out in his mind. He moves his hand faster, cock throbbing and aching for release.

But he’s not there yet.

Closing his eyes, Yoongi lets himself sink back into the memory, rewinding the moments from just hours ago. The sensation of your weight against him is the first thing he recalls—the way your ass fits so perfectly in his lap, warm and soft, like you were made to be there. The way your body had melted into his touch, so pliant, so eager, grinding slightly like you were inviting him to ruin you, and he was more than willing to oblige.

Your lips—he can still taste them if he focuses hard enough—sweet, intoxicating, like the lingering memory of his favorite whisky. And your neck, the way it arched so perfectly for him, leaving him no choice but to press his mouth against it, the faint hint of your skin still ghosting on his lips even now.

If he concentrates, he can almost smell you again, that sweet, delicate perfume that drove him insane. It’s like you’ve imprinted yourself on him. Or maybe it’s the faint traces of your scent that linger on his hoodie, the one you pressed yourself into while straddling him and he could feel the perfect ass against his crotch. 

The thought is enough to send his pulse ticking faster, his head leaning back against the chair as a low, frustrated groan escapes him. He needs you. Fervently. Urgently. Needs you like he has never needed another person ever. 

Jaw slack, tongue dangling from the corner of his mouth, he imagines licking your nipples from side to side and his mouth stretches into a smile. He can almost hear you moan oh yoongi and wow what an ego boost to have you unraveling for him when in reality it’s he who is actually unraveling in his own damn hands. His cock is getting heavier, balls tighter at his impending demise. He tugs and tugs, collecting some of the lube that gathered on the base and pushing it back towards his angry tip, concentrating his movements there.

You’re not in the room but you might as well be with the way your name keeps tumbling from his lips. He is whining like a little bitch in heat, but he doesn’t give a shit. He hasn’t had a satisfying jerk-off like this in a while. He can’t even remember sex being this good. Nothing remotely like the way this fog of lust has him ascending to another plane of existence right now, because you’re so fucking sexy and so good to him and he likes you so damn much and suddenly he’s coming, warm spurts of cum oozes from his throbbing cock decorating his fingers like the rings he used to wear to the knuckle, and fuck he’s still going, there’s so much and god dammit his boxers are soaked but it feels phenomenal.

Chest heaving as if he ran a marathon, he stares at his ceiling, waiting for his heart rate to slow down.

Not long after, he laughs at his stupidity, pulling a wipe from the packet and proceeds to clean up. He sobers up from his horny thoughts, but not by a whole lot. Not when the photo that started it all is still bright and beautiful from his phone. Shit. He cannot wait to fuck you for real. 

Little did he know, something was gonna fuck him up come morning.

AllKpop Scoop:

Confirmed: SUGA of BTS Dating Actress Lee Sung Kyung

Eagle-eyed fans are convinced the duo has been hiding their relationship in plain sight, pointing to their undeniable chemistry during a past Suchwita episode, where sparks were reportedly flying between the two.

The story was everywhere. News sites, entertainment shows, gossip columns, social media—each one milking it for all it was worth. 

Darling of the press, K-drama royalty, multi-awarded thespian Lee Sung Kyung, had resurfaced from her mysterious hiatus, and of course, the headlines couldn’t resist pairing her name with “infamous idol Min Yoongi.” You roll your eyes so far back your head they almost didn’t come back.

The South Korean media was having an absolute field day.

And as much as it hurt to see it, your first instinct wasn’t to dwell on the sting of the rumors. It was to scan every word, every post, every thread, checking if Haneul had been dragged into the mess.

Thankfully, he hadn’t been. You’d be devastated if your little sarang had been implicated in any of these stories. You don’t know the first thing about how to protect the poor baby from these trolls, but you will be damned if you don’t try.

The photo that sparked the frenzy was everywhere—a shot of Sung Kyung leaving Yoongi’s Hannam apartment. That was it. No Yoongi, no Haneul, not even a hint of context. Never mind that the building housed countless tenants or that there was zero proof they were together. It was enough to send the internet spiraling into speculation.

You were scrolling through the comments under one of the reposts, your stomach churning at the sheer creativity of the assumptions being thrown around, when your screen suddenly switched to an incoming call.

Yoongi.

You didn’t hesitate, swiping to pick up almost immediately.

“Sarang,” he starts, his voice soft and familiar, like he already knows he needs to tread lightly. Bro’s really starting with the buttering up.

“Where’s Han?” Was your first question.

“My parents drove him up to Daegu this morning. It’s better if he’s there for now.”

You let out a heavy sigh, rubbing your temple as you sit back. “Just answer one question, Yoongi: is it true or not?”

“It’s a big fuckin’ lie,” he says without missing a beat, his voice steady and firm. “None of it is true.”

“So it’s all bullshit?”

“YES.” he replies emphatically.

The tension in your shoulders eases slightly, and you exhale, nodding to yourself. This is fine for now. “Okay.”

“Okay?” There’s a note of uncertainty in his voice, like he wasn’t expecting you to let it go so easily.

“Yes. Just get your ass here by 7 and not a minute later.” You say, firm.

A pause. Then, with the faintest hint of a chuckle, he replies, “Yes, ma’am.”

Part Five >

A/N: So???? I don't know what that first part was. It just took a life of its own. Anyway, as per ush, please let me know what you thought about the chapter. Feedback is always appreciated. Thank you so much for reading this, you lovely, beautiful human xo

See you in the next half! :)

Permanent Taglist:

@wonh0oe @hyukaluve @glossdebut @kiki-zb @kookiewithluv

@agustblog @maryhopemei @perfectiondazesworld @kimsaerom @kam9404

@00-sleepdontweep-00 @tea4sykes @mggv97 @marnz1990

@whydoeyecare @pastelmin @tarahardcore @minjenna @chimmchimmm

@aaclariww @mar-lo-pap @tinytan-gerine @vesperbells @butterymin

@eve1633455 @baechugff @lilkittenjenjen @wobblewobble822 @coffeedepressionsoup

@futuristicenemychaos @jadestonedaeho7 @granataepfelchen @whoa-jo @annyeongbitch7

@chimmisbae @sexytholland @idkjustlovingbts @kpophosblog @tinyelfperson

@yoongicatagenda @codeinebelle @parapiop7 @diame93 @janeelizabeth1216

@withmuchluv-tannie @abadiimm

@angellekookie @dearmyfavoritepeople-bts @hannahisnotblue @this-most-assuredly-counts

@no-jiminprotested

[twentyfivemiceinatrenchcoat]

”why are you so good at that?”

his caress is gentle. tender, steady, secure; and practiced, you can tell, just from the instant relief you feel — the vivid care in how his fingertips smooth along your skin. 

suguru presses his thumbs into the bridge of your nose, right beneath your forehead, big palms cupping your face. they’re warm, calloused, but still somehow so soft — massaging you gently. the pads of his fingers trail upwards, rubbing soothing little circles against your temples. as if he’s memorized every patch of skin, seen the very inside of your skull. as if he knows exactly where to apply pressure to make the sharp jolts of pain go away. 

and it’s working. the room you’re in is dimly lit, illuminated only by the vermilion rays of the setting sun, bleeding in through the gap between the opened shoji screens. a faint, summery scent accompanies them; like burnt roses, or a salty ocean breeze, not enough to rouse the nausea in your throat. it’s quiet. all you can hear is the soft humming of your lover, and your own relieved breaths, pulled out by his skillful hands. his pointer fingers pinch between your brows, and another one follows. the sweetest little sigh. 

”am i?” his voice is soft, even more so than usual, as if the slightest noise could disrupt your peace. a smile is knit between the vowels. ”i’m glad.”

he sounds a little tired. it’s been a long day for both of you, so it’s no surprise. when you finally got back home, the inside of your skull was tormented by a persistent ache, and suguru was blinking with fatigue — though he still insisted on doing this. lying you down on his lap, like a fragile doll, crossing his legs to give you enough space to rest comfortably; the back of your head finding respite on his thigh, senses enveloped by the silk of his robes, smelling lightly of cherry blossoms and sandalwood. comfy.

and, after only a couple minutes of his loving treatment, the ache began to dull. sweet relief seeping into your nerves.

he reminds you to take deep breaths, watching intently as the contours of your face fall back into a state of tranquility. whenever he shifts, the tatami mats beneath him rustle, and your muddled mind sways like the rocking of a boat; slight, but still enough to coax a wince from out your throat, a tiny spark of pain blooming between your sinuses, followed by a murmured apology from the man above you. 

a hum buzzes in his throat. you hear it, eyes still shut, waiting for him to answer your question. and he does, of course — so weak to you, always, your voice the key to his locked-up heart.

”back in high school…” he starts, diligently continuing the facial massage, comforting circles rubbed into your skin. ”... my best friend got migraines often.” 

a soft groan slips from out your parted lips, when he pushes against a certain spot — locating the pressure points like brushing specks of dust from off his clothing. effortless. 

”ah,” you click your tongue, melting into his touch. turning into a boneless puddle, cradled in his lap, comfy as can be. ”your mysterious bestie, huh?”

it’s not the first you’ve heard of this best friend. suguru’s mentioned him before, though only in passing, in whispers, comments he hopes will sound absentminded. they never do — because suguru says the word friend like it’s a prayer. 

(that explains it, though. no wonder it feels so good; it is practiced. should you feel jealous?

well, maybe. but you mostly think it’s kind of sweet.)

before you can think of what you’re saying, the words have left your lips. they tumble out like little pizzicato drops, spoken casually, matter-of-factly. a tiny chirp of a thing.

”you must have loved him a lot.”

…

silence.

for just a moment, the thumbs pressing against your skin halt — just for a second, but enough to notice, and suddenly you feel a little like the air has been sucked out of the room.

even with your eyes closed, you know suguru’s smile is nowhere to be seen. 

it’s funny, how well you’ve come to know him. how you’ve learned to memorize every expression you’ve ever seen him make, any signs of distress or discomfort. he does this thing with his eyes, sometimes — a thin kind of concealment, when you shuffle a little too close for his comfort. figuratively speaking, because you’re almost certain he’d let you crawl under his skin if you asked. but sometimes you twist the key to his heart a little too abruptly, and his eyes of gold and ochre shift in the light, honey clogging the interior of his cornea. something sickly-sweet. something he’s kept locked up for a long time.

a nostalgia so palpable it breaks your heart just to look at it.

you don’t want to open your eyes. you don’t want to see the kind of face he’s making right now. you don’t want to know if he’s pursing his lips, or furrowing his brows, just because of your carelessly chosen words — you know his old best friend is a sensitive subject. gosh, you’re stupid. 

stupid, stupid, stupid.

(why can’t you ever just read the room?)

blindly, you stumble for something to say, parting your lips. desperate to change the topic, to save him from this suffocating silence.

— but then suguru breaks it.

”yeah.”

when your eyes flutter open, he’s looking out into the garden. watching the sun, as it sinks beneath the mountains, lips curved up into a small smile.

”i suppose i did.”

…

you take a moment to look at him. the bridge of his nose, the firm lines of his jaw — the slightest tremble of the muscle. and those eyes, set afire by the final rays of the setting sun, burned to ash. filled with… something. not regret.

just longing.

suddenly, the pads of his fingers are dancing along your skin again; gliding down to pinch your nose. it makes you yelp, a tiny squeak.

and then he’s looking at you. 

”but i love you more,” he croons, a little tilt of his head that make his bangs move like a black curtain. eyes swirling with humour, something syrupy and teasing, awfully fond. ”my little dove.”

before you know it, your cheeks are blossoming with warmth; the branches of your lips curling up into a shy smile. his attention is a little too much to bear, so you wriggle out of his grasp — turning around to press your face into his stomach. his sleeves cast a curtain around you, a protective veil, but it’s not long until you’re being coaxed back into your original position.

”ah ah,” he tuts, chiding you lovingly; a coo in the back of his throat. ”none of that. let me take care of you.”

all you can do is groan, meekly, squeezing your eyes shut. suguru only chuckles, cupping your cheeks and continuing to apply pressure on your forehead and nose, large warm palms against your chilled skin — unwilling to let you escape his pampering.

the sun sets eventually. but he keeps you on his lap until the headache has faded entirely, until your eyelids have dragged you into a deep slumber, until tiny snores are seeping from your parted lips. until the moon has pulled itself into the night sky above you.

somehow, even on the brink of exhaustion, you manage to feel his warm lips against your forehead; hear the muffled murmur against your skin.

”sweet dreams, my darling,” comes a whisper, deep and silky, coaxing you further into the cradle of sleep. his thumb smooths along your cheekbone, down to the curve of your jaw — a trail of warmth. ”come back to me soon, won’t you?”

he smiles. you feel it, that soft upward curve, a blissed out sensation drowning you in white noise. the space inside your mind is free of pain, filled only with thoughts of him, the lines of his fingers burning patterns into your skin. one final kiss pressed between your brows, and then he’s pulling away; curling his arms under your knees and hoisting you up. into his steady arms, his robes shielding you from the soft glow of the stars.

”… don’t dawdle in dreamland for too long.”

the whisper goes unheard. fast asleep, suguru can only gaze at you, drinking in the serenity on your features. trying not to remember a boy with blue eyes — the similar expression he wore once his migraines had begun to fade.

he shakes his head, and carries you towards the bedroom. safe and sound in his embrace.

[gotta-winwin]

(🎄) ... mirth and good cheer - xmas special

⭐ starring: vernon

🎄preview: vernon used to fly back to new york every christmas for one reason only: his childhood best friend. christmas used to be his and y/n’s thing, until he got seemingly too busy to ever return. now, as y/n departs to korea for the first time, she can’t help but wonder if her and vernon would ever cross paths again. vernon, unbeknownst to her, has been wondering the exact same thing. as the boys set up their christmas tree in their dorm, he does his best to ignore how hints of y/n still seemed to linger throughout the holiday air. 

tw/cw: idol!vernon x nonidol!reader, childhood friends to lovers, estranged friends, slight miscommunication, fluff, slight angst, best christmas romcom vibes, features svt members, stubborn!reader, equallystubborn!vernon, use of y/n, flips between past and present day

☁️ masterlist & a/n: dropping a vernon x reader fic for our xmas special! doesn't vernon just scream childhood bestie to lover (੭˃ᴗ˂)੭ merry christmas my loves!

11 DAYS FROM CHRISTMAS 2024:

“That’s not how it’s supposed to work.” Mingyu slapped Vernon’s hand away from the tree they were decorating. “It’s supposed to be symmetrical, not whatever you’re doing.”

Vernon had to admit he wasn’t really paying attention. Their dorm auntie, the one who came around once a week to clean up the place, had baked them gingerbread men as a Christmas gift, and the smell felt like it had seeped into the walls of their dorm. It was a nostalgic smell, one that took him back to his childhood, new york and-

“Vernon?” Mingyu waved a hand in front of his face. “Are you even listening right now?”

He blinked, brought back from his thoughts. “Sorry, hyung. What?”

Mingyu could only let out a deep sigh, moving to place the bauble where he intended it to be. “You’re like this every Christmas. If you miss her so much, why don’t you just fly back?”

Vernon didn’t really know why he wasn’t flying back. He certainly could be, they were off work for the holidays and a plane ticket back wasn’t hard to find. He would be doing himself a favor, putting himself out of misery and finally seeing his childhood best friend. The thing was, he wasn’t really sure if Y/N wanted to see him. He shrugged. “I don’t miss her.” It was a lie and everyone in the room knew it. 

CHRISTMAS DAY 2003: 

Everyone who knew either of them would say they were smart kids for their age. Both only five, they whispered secrets to each other like little middle schoolers would on the playground. 

“My parents say I’m going to Korea.” Vernon whispered to Y/N as they watched a christmas movie. “Forever.” Vernon always had a dramatic, theatrical side to him, even as a child.

Y/N could only frown. “Forever? Why?” She couldn’t imagine her best friend moving anywhere without her. “Am I going too?” 

Vernon mirrored her frown on his own face. “I don’t know.” Sensing her sadness, he reached over and gave her a hug. “I’ll visit every year.” He promised. 

“Every christmas.” Y/N insisted. She had always loved christmas above all else. “So we can watch movies again.”

Vernon agreed. “Okay. Every christmas. It’ll be like-” He paused, his young mind searching for the word. “Tradition.” He smiled at her, proud of the big word. 

“Promise?” Y/N stared at him with wide eyes, reaching out with her pinky, extended. “Pinky promise me.” 

Vernon grasped her pinky with his, shaking it firmly. He felt like a grown up, making one of those important business deals. “I promise.” Turning back to the screen, he let out a whine when he realized they had missed the best part. “We missed the part where the grinch screams down the mountain.” He complained. “I wanted to watch that part.”

Y/N got up, searching for the remote. “I’ll turn it back.” 

Their dynamic never changed, even as they grew older. Vernon walked through life, Y/N following behind him with eyes filled with admiration, gently nudging the boy whenever he got distracted and began walking off-track. It stayed that way even with the distance, until one Christmas, Y/N woke up and Vernon had not returned. 

CHRISTMAS DAY 2016:

“Mom?” Y/N called as she walked slowly down the stairs. She had returned home from university for the holidays and was confused when Vernon wasn’t at his usual spot to welcome her home. “Where’s Vernon?” He was usually back from Korea by now.

She didn’t like the look of pity her mother was giving her. “He didn’t tell you, honey? He’s been so busy with work, looks like he can’t fly back to join us for christmas this year.”

She felt her heart sink. She had been looking forward to spending time with him, even if it was just a couple of days out of the year. “Oh.” Of course, she understood. His work was important and she was sure the kpop industry couldn’t be easy. “That’s okay. I guess he must’ve been too busy to tell me.” 

--

“What are you still doing here?” Joshua frowned at Vernon, who was lying down on his bed. “Shouldn’t you be in New York by now?” He was used to Vernon flying back to New York every christmas since they had met. 

Vernon let out a huff. “Not going back this year, Josh.” 

“Why not?” His friend pressed, confused. Vernon was usually so excited to go back. “Isn’t your friend going to be sad?”

“I can’t miss any more practice before our comeback. One Christmas should be fine.” Vernon explained, although his voice betrayed his disappointment. He had been looking forward to going back home, to be able to see Y/N again. He thought to himself that one christmas couldn’t hurt, right?

One Christmas missed turned into two. Then four. Then the timing felt too long and awkward and Vernon just never got the confidence to ever go back.

10 DAYS FROM CHRISTMAS 2024: 

Korea was beautiful underneath a sheet of snow. Y/N had landed last night, having made up her mind to give living in Korea a try. Ever since graduating university and landing a job as a screenwriter, her friends and family had always urged her to try working for the Korean film scene. 

She supposed she had always just avoided the country because of Vernon.

Her new job writing for some K-drama started after New Years. She thought maybe spending Christmas in a new place would bring back the mirth and good cheer the holiday used to give her, but she knew she was here for a different reason. A selfish and pathetic one. It burned her, that a part of her still wished to bump into Vernon after all these years. She knew he was doing well, SEVENTEEN was soaring through new heights and she had kept tabs on his ongoing success. It was the only way she kept going: his large internet presence sometimes made it feel like he never even left at all.

It hurt her the most that he could be doing so well without ever seeing her again.

Rounding the corner to the coffee shop, she rubbed her raw hands to regain heat. Ordering, she was relieved to find out she could still hold a conversation in Korean. It had gone rusty, the only people she ever used Korean with back home was Vernon’s dad and sister. 

“Hello?” Someone from behind her tapped her on the shoulder. “Do I know you from somewhere?”

She was greeted by a slightly taller, blond man, sporting black rimmed glasses and holding a cup of iced coffee. Her mind short circuiting a bit from the sudden Korean, she paused, trying to recollect her thoughts before replying. “I don’t think so?” 

The man’s eyes widened in sudden recognition. “You’re the girl in the Christmas photos!” He exclaimed with wonder, pointing at her as if they were long lost friends.

She squinted, giving him another look over. “Um..” She frowned, quite sure she didn’t know this man. 

“Sorry.” He smiled sheepishly at her, extending his hand for a handshake. “That probably came out wrong. You’re Vernon’s friend from New York, right? I’ve seen you in the pictures on his wall.” 

She blanched, all of a sudden feeling very light and disoriented. “I’m sorry.” She smiled politely, still racking her brain furiously for the guy’s name. “How do you know Vernon?”

“I’m Seungkwan.” He explained, dropping her hand. “Vernon’s bandmate.”

She let out a sound of realization. “Ah~” She knew who he was. “Seungkwan. Sorry, I didn’t expect you to have blonde hair now.” 

Chuckling at her shy admission, Seungkwan felt strangely sad to see the girl in Korea. “When did you come to Korea?” He asked, knowing Vernon would lose his shit if he found out they had been in the same location for a while. 

“I arrived just last night.” 

He left out a breath he hadn’t realized he had been holding. Okay, at least it hadn’t been very long. “You should come to our Christmas party.” He suggested, knowing Vernon would be there. “It’s being hosted at Coups hyung’s house this year, and everyone will be there.”

Y/N shook her head. “I wouldn’t want to make things weird.” She already caught on to the fact that Seungkwan knew all about her and Vernon’s falling out, or lack of one. 

“You wouldn’t.” He insisted. “You must come. I’d hate to see you spend Christmas by yourself.” 

It didn’t take much for Y/N to relent. She supposed a part of her had been looking for a chance to see Vernon again. “Alright. I’ll stop by and say a quick hi to everyone.” 

Seungkwan’s smile was contagious as he beamed, grabbing a napkin to scribble Scoups’ address onto it and handing it to her. “It’s at 7pm on the 24th. Bring a present- something small.” He hurriedly gave her all the details as he left, mumbling about being late for a company meeting and how lovely it was to finally meet Vernon’s mystery girl.

Holding the napkin in her still freezing hand, Y/N felt utterly shipwrecked as she watched Seungkwan leave. Nine days was enough to prepare her heart to see Vernon again, right?

12 HOURS TILL CHRISTMAS 2024: 

The frost in the air bit at Y/N’s face and neck as she quickly rang the doorbell to Seungcheol’s home. It was smaller than she had expected it to be, homey and comfortably situated in between two other larger houses. 

“Y/N!” Seungkwan greeted her as he opened the door, tugging her in. “Oh, look at you. You must be freezing. Come in, come in.” Taking her coat from her and hanging it up, he beamed down at her. “I’m so glad you actually came.” 

She bit back a smile, taking off her shoes. “I couldn’t turn down an invitation from Vernon’s friends.” 

“Vernon’s in the living room with the others.” Seungkwan pointed down the hall, directing her over. 

Y/N paused, loitering in the hallway between the door to the living room and the door to the kitchen. She felt strangely pulled towards the kitchen, knowing it’d be safe without the chance of a potential run-in with Vernon. Turning decisively towards the kitchen, she pretended not to hear Seungkwan’s deep sigh as he followed her in, knowing the boy was disappointed she had run away. 

“It’s the girl from Vernon’s photos!” Hoshi sprung off the kitchen island to greet her, handing her  a cup of mystery liquid. 

She sniffed it before cringing away at the strong liquor scent. “That’s me.” She mumbled, shoulders sagging a little. “Does he really still have photos of me up? 

Everyone in the kitchen nodded simultaneously. “It’s been on his wall since we were trainees.” Joshua informed her, his eyes holding a teasing glint. “Every time we move places he just puts it back up.” 

Y/N didn’t really know what to do with that information. “Oh.” She replied, looking down in her cup, thinking. “I didn’t know that.” 

Seungkwan let out a loud sigh once again. “You should go talk to him.” 

She looked up. 

“Please.” He added, his tone bordering on begging. “He’s been so grumpy. Especially during the holiday season. I got a pillow to the face for asking him a simple question yesterday.” He grumbled out, complaining about his moody roommate. 

“What did you ask him?” Joshua asked, mildly curious.

Seungkwan shrugged. “Just if he was going back to New York.”

“Of course he threw a pillow at you.” Joshua rolled his eyes. “I’m surprised he didn’t just deck you, with how you were antagonizing him. You know very well he hasn’t gone back in years.” 

Y/N watched the conversation silently, gagging quietly as she sipped the concoction Hoshi had handed her. She absorbed the information diligently, her eyes widening the more information she got on Vernon. Distance had turned him into a stranger - and now, well, she couldn’t really say she knew him at all. It was strange, having to admit someone she used to read like the back of her own hand was someone she now didn’t know at all. 

“I’m going to the living room.” She decided, having had enough of the topic. If she kept listening to them talk about Vernon’s struggles and heartache about leaving her in New York one more minute she might find herself leaving for the night. Being in the same room with Vernon was just going to be awkward silence anyways. She knew he wasn’t brave enough to approach her. At least not tonight. 

--

“Y/N!” 

It was Mingyu and Wonwoo who greeted her from the couch, the two of them in the middle of an intense round of what looked to be Mariokart. They waved at her from their place, inviting her over to sit next to them. She was painfully aware of Vernon’s eyes staring at her from his place on the rug, fingers busy with a random puzzle that was lying out. 

“Hi guys.” She smiled, sitting down, laughing when Mingyu pushed Wonwoo in an attempt to disrupt his driving. 

“We didn’t know you were in Korea for Christmas!” Mingyu exclaimed. “Good thing Seungkwan bumped into you when he did and invited you over.” 

She glanced at Vernon, who was doing his best to pretend like he wasn’t interested in their conversation. “Yeah. I moved here recently actually. Got a job writing for a TV show.” 

Vernon’s eyes widened as he fixed his stare against the white rug. 

“That’s cool.” Wonwoo smiled at Y/N, happy for her. “It’s good that you’re in Korea now.” He side eyed Vernon, frowning when he realized the boy hadn’t even spoken to Y/N. Nudging him with his foot, he gestured with his gaze. “Did you hear Vernon? Y/N got a job here.”

Vernon nodded stiffly before standing up. “I think Cheol hyung’s calling me, I’ll- I’ll go see what he wants.” And just like that he was gone, rushing out of the living room. 

Wonwoo looked apologetically at Y/N. “I’m sorry about that.”

She shrugged, although her heart had cracked at the movement. “It’s okay.” 

“Maybe now that you’re in Korea you guys can be friends again?” Mingyu suggested quietly, although a part of him wasn’t really certain about it. “Maybe?”

“Maybe.” She mumbled, taking another sip of her drink, feeling her face flush with heat. Anger or embarrassment, she couldn’t tell. 

Maybe it was the alcohol speaking, but Y/N could feel her lips start to loosen the more she sat with Mingyu and Wonwoo, the party heading later into the night. 

“You know I used to hate you guys.” She admitted all of a sudden, jolting both boys out of whatever conversation they were having. 

“What?” Wonwoo frowned. “Why?”

“I hated Vernon for choosing you guys over me.” She lowered her eyes to the floor, feeling ashamed. “I know it’s childish of me, but hating you guys was how I dealt with it. I couldn’t bring myself to hate Vernon for his own actions.” 

Mingyu looked at her with sad eyes as he patted her on the back gently. “I get that.” He reassured her, and she looked over at Wonwoo who was nodding as well. 

“Do you still hate us?” Wonwoo asked, his voice calm.

She shook her head. “No. So I guess I’m just-” She paused. “Confused now.”

She hated how pitiful their looks made her feel as she sat there, nursing her half finished drink, mind spinning. Perhaps it was time to leave her silly childhood infatuation with Vernon in the past. It seemed like he had done so already anyways. 

10 HOURS TILL CHRISTMAS 2024: 

Vernon felt like throwing up the moment he saw Y/N enter the party. It felt like a vision, something he had conjured up within his own mind, until the others had greeted her and shattered his vision into reality. 

“Talk to her, you moron.” Seungkwan nudged him. He had retreated from the living room into the kitchen the moment Y/N had sat down with the others on the couch. It physically stung to be in the same room as her, with all the knowledge that he had failed her and their once cherished friendship. 

He took another gulp of his drink instead of answering Seungkwan. 

“She clearly still loves you, y’know.” The boy continued upon hearing Vernon’s silence. “Or else she wouldn’t be here. And didn’t you always tell us Y/N would follow you around like a puppy whenever you were back home as kids?” 

Screw Seungkwan and his amazing, awfully selective memory.

“So?” Vernon mumbled, rolling his shoulders back and feeling himself tense. “Things change.”

“You’ve changed.” 

Vernon stared at his friend, thrown off by the sudden harsh truths. “What?”

“I don’t think she’s changed at all, Vernon.” Seungkwan observed. “It’s you who’s changed and you who has to fix it.” He paused. “Or at least explain it to her. Why you don’t want to be friends anymore.” 

“I do want to be friends.” He stated plainly.

Seungkwan cut his eyes at him, exasperated. “Then tell her that. Jeez, bro. You suck at this.” 

“We’re swapping presents now!” Seungcheol poked his head out from behind the hallway door. “Everyone in the living room!” 

Vernon grabbed his present from the counter and headed in behind Seungkwan and Joshua, turning the box in his hands as he examined the poor wrapping job he had done last night. He had bought the most generic gift he could find, knowing it was going to be a random swap with the boys. The thing he hadn’t accounted for was Y/N showing up - and now it had thrown both his present and him off the game. 

“Grab a pair.” Seungcheol announced loudly to everyone in the room, as there was a mad scramble for partners. 

Vernon found himself standing alone in the midst of his bandmates all already coupled up, limbs tangled together in an awkward mad dash for a partner. His eyes met the only other person with a partner and he stifled a pained cry. 

“It looks like you and Y/N are exchanging gifts this year, Non.” Seungkwan shot him a large grin from his spot next to Mingyu.

He knew this had to be preplanned - fate couldn’t be this cruel, right?

“Go on.” Seungkwan poked him in the back, urging him to approach Y/N, who suddenly seemed to be very captivated by a nearby portrait of Seungcheol and Kkmua, placed on the shelf next to her. She stared at it intensely, although Vernon knew she was still hyper-aware of the fact that he was slowly walking towards her. She had that funny way of darting her eyes towards the person she was avoiding while not facing in their direction. 

“Y/N.” Her name sounded so foreign yet so familiar across his tongue as he spoke.

“Vernon.” 

Her voice felt like coming home. 

“Here.” He placed his gift in her hands as he took hers, turning it awkwardly in his hands. “What is it?” He asked, shaking it gently. 

The corners of her mouth lifted. “Telling you would defeat the purpose of it being a surprise.” 

“You said that last time too.” 

He watched her stiffen at his words and he immediately regretted bringing up the past. They both knew last time had been years ago. 

“I guess I did.” She replied stiffly, turning his gift in her hands. “What’s yours?”

“Thought you liked your presents to be a surprise?” He recalled, remembering how she used to whine that he must wrap her presents, when the teenage him had insisted that just putting it in a bag would be fine. 

“I do.” Her tone made it sound like she was just remembering that fact herself. She looked up and shot him an awkward smile. “I guess I don’t really know what to say.”

“Me either.” 

He could’ve sworn he saw her face drop at his words. 

They separated soon after, the uncomfortable silence taking over and suffocating them both out of the vicinity of each other. Vernon returned to his spot in the kitchen, picking at the pieces of takeout still leftover on the counter, listening to the others squabble over meaningless things. 

He watched Y/N leave, feet rooted by the hallway door and mouth firmly shut closed - he didn’t trust himself to say goodbye to her - he knew that if he had, a million unsaid words would have spilled out and the night would have ended terribly for the both of them. But it was the fear that kept him still most of all, as he watched her exchange numbers with Seungkwan, hugging the others and promising to keep in touch. He stayed as still as a statue as the door shut behind her. 

“You idiot.” Seungkwan turned to face him as soon as he locked the door. 

“Seungkwan.” Seungcheol’s warning tone made Vernon look at him. He was sending a strong warning glance at the boy. 

“What?” Seungkwan protested. “He is being stupid.” 

“I think I’m going to head back.” Vernon mumbled, grabbing his coat and hurriedly throwing it on, Y/N’s gift clutched tightly under his arm as he headed for the door. “Thanks for the party, Coups hyung.” He called behind him, shutting the door behind him and welcoming in the cool, biting winter air. 

He released the pent up breath that had been choking him all night and furiously wiped away the tears that had begun to form the moment he shut the door behind him. 

“Idiot.” He quietly chided himself. “So stupid.”

CHRISTMAS 2018: 

“Are you really never going back to New York?” Joshua prodded at his arm with an insistent jab of a finger. 

Vernon hummed in response. “There’s no point. My family prefers coming to Korea for the holidays anyways. They get to visit family here and everything.” 

“What about your girlfriend?”

Vernon turned his head to see Joshua sporting a shit eating grin. “You know she’s not my girlfriend.”

“Might as well be.” He shrugged, pointing at the various photos that featured her against his wall. “Look at your pathetic loving gaze at her in all of these photos. You’re not even looking at the camera in any of these.” 

Vernon frowned at his comment, taking a good look at the photos and realizing Joshua was right. “Doesn’t matter what I feel, hyung. She’s not my girlfriend.”

“She’ll never be if you don’t go back.” Joshua suddenly got serious, as he shifted in his seat to look at Vernon better. “Is there an actual reason why you won’t go back? I know we were too busy the last two years but this year we’re free.” 

Vernon stayed silent even though the answer was clear as day in his mind. He was scared, terrified even. Terrified he had hurt her by neglecting her due to his heavy schedules, that she would slam the door in his face if he tried to visit her. “I don’t want to see her hate me.” He finally spat out, cringing as he said it. 

Joshua let out a tiny noise of understanding. “So you’re avoiding her. Pretending so you don’t have to deal with the consequences.”

“When you put it like that you make me sound like an asshole.” 

Joshua gave him a look that bordered on pitiful. “I don’t know what to tell you, man.” 

“I’d rather remember her like this, y’know?” He said, pointing at the way she smiled at him in the pictures on his wall. “Instead of-”

“She might not hate you.” Joshua reminded him quietly from next to him. 

“I really, really doubt that, hyung.” 

5 HOURS TILL CHRISTMAS: 

It wasn’t computing properly into Vernon’s head that you had just gotten him the one thing he’s been wanting all his life. 

He had been ogling the Novation Launchpad Pro that was currently sitting on his work table for the last hour, not really believing what he was seeing with his own two eyes. Unwrapping it had been a heart attack in of itself, as he opened up Y/N’s present to reveal the one thing that had been sitting on the top of his childhood wish list since he could remember. Even now, as a famous artist who could afford the splurge, he had never gotten it for himself, knowing it was a luxury and a purchase he didn’t necessarily need. 

“What the fuck, Y/N.” He muttered in disbelief, sliding his palm down his face as he continued to stare at the gift. It was fucking fantastic and exactly what he wanted, and it made him feel even worse about the whole situation. 

She might not hate you. He recalled the words Joshua had told him one time, Christmases ago. 

“Someone who hated me wouldn’t have gotten me this, right?” He said aloud to himself, reaching a timid hand out to fiddle with the launchpad controls. “How did she even know we’d be exchanging gifts anyways?” And how on earth does she know I never got myself one? In what felt like a split second decision, Vernon felt himself walking towards the door of his apartment, sliding his shoes on and grabbing his keys - only one destination in mind. He had to fix this, somehow. Because there was no fucking way she still hated him.

4 HOURS TILL CHRISTMAS:

She would’ve complained that the sudden doorbell at 3am woke her up but she hadn’t really been sleeping. Y/N had been lying in bed with her eyes wide open since the moment she’d gotten home, the bag of chocolates and various snacks from Vernon left on her kitchen counter. She had stifled a laugh when she opened it - even till this day, Vernon’s go to gift was still the same. Chocolate and snacks can never fail, he had told her, defending his choice of gift. Especially when you don’t know the person too well. 

She supposed that line made sense for their situation too. 

“Vernon?” She squinted at the figure standing on her porch in the dark. “What are you doing here?” She rubbed her eyes, mildly wondering if she was dreaming. 

He rubbed the back of his neck awkwardly as he stared down at her. “You got me the launchpad.” 

She blinked. “Yeah.”

“How’d you know?”

She stared back at him, stunned at his bluntness and the randomness of the current setting. “You never shut up about it.” 

His mouth opened and closed again. She watched as he tried looking for words, his vocabulary ultimately failing him. 

“Come inside.” She said quietly, noticing how the harsh winter wind blew at his thin coat. Dragging him gently inside, she shut the door behind them both, turning around awkwardly to face him. She never thought she’d ever see him in his apartment - yet he looked so perfect.

“I’m sorry.” He mumbled, eyes darting around her place, taking it all in. “I know it’s late.” Glancing down at her pajamas, his lips quivered in a small smile. “Cute.”

“What?” She stared at him indignantly, completely thrown off by his behaviour. “Are you drunk?” She reached out a hand to touch his face, trying to check his temperature, but he caught her hand in his before she could reach. 

“I’m not drunk, Y/N.” He dropped her hand like it had burned him. 

“Then what are you here for?”

She watched him moisten his lips as he stalled for time. 

“I wanted to say sorry.” He finally said, his words tumbling out as if they had been held back for long enough. “I shouldn’t have cut you off like that.” 

She thought she’d have a more visceral reaction to the apology she had been waiting for all this time, but she didn’t. “Why are you saying this now? It’s been nearly ten years, Vernon.” 

“I know. I’m sorry.” 

Her shoulders sagged at his words and the sight of his dejected, ashamed face. “Why didn’t you come back? Or text me?” She asked him, pleading for an answer. 

He finally looked up and met her eyes. “I guess I was scared. I got busy one year and didn’t go back- and I neglected our friendship. And then-” He paused, his voice breaking. “I left, and time passed and staying away felt simpler than going back. No goodbye felt better than a bad one.” 

“It wouldn’t have been a bad goodbye.” 

He shook his head. “You hated me.” 

She looked away, remembering all the times she had cursed him for leaving her behind when she was younger. “Maybe. But never for long.” She mustered all her courage to tell him her next words. “I loved you too much to hate you for very long.” 

Vernon blinked at her. “You loved me?”

She hummed in response, still not quite looking at him. They stood there, by her door, in the dim lights of her apartment. 

“How did you even get my address?” She suddenly asked, forgetting he shouldn’t have known where to find her. 

Vernon stayed silent, his mind still reeling from the sudden love confession. She used to love me? 

“Vernon.” Y/N nudged him. 

“Oh.” He finally responded, although his own voice felt like light years away as his mind continued to reel. “I asked my sister. Didn’t know you guys still talked.” 

“Oh.” 

“You used to love me?” He asked, incredulous, not quite believing her words. “Why?”

She laughed, and the sound wrapped around Vernon like her hugs used to. “What do you mean, why? Of course I loved you. I followed you around like a lost kid our entire childhood.” 

“I loved you too, y’know.” 

Her smile dropped as she paused mid-laugh. “What?” 

He took a step closer to her, unsure where the sudden confidence was coming from. Vernon searched her eyes for some figment of affection, for truth, for the way she used to look at him when they were younger. “I don’t think I ever stopped loving you.” He finally admitted. “I definitely tried to, but your hold on me lasted through distance and time.” 

“Me too.” 

“What?”

“I never stopped loving you too.”

[maddie0101]

guilty pleasures pt.2 ౨ৎ

౨ৎ summary: you get a text message from dean saying he needs to talk to you about something, so you leave class to meet him—only you don't make it to the lockers and neither does dean.

౨ৎ warnings: smut (mdni). fingering. dean’s got a dirty mouth. unprotected sex. wrap it before you tap it kids. p in v. semi public sex. dean’s got it bad for the reader. besties to lovers. lmk if I missed anything.

౨ৎ word count: 1.5k

haven’t read part one yet? link is here!

You honestly tried your best to pay attention in class but ever since you and Dean had that moment back in study hall, you couldn't think straight. Dean had always been flirty with you but you never imagined that he might feel the same way as you did. Was he about to kiss you back in study hall? Surely not, considering the two of you were in class and around other people. Right?

A sudden buzz of your phone quickly caught your attention as you reached down into your purse and hid the device under your desk. Tapping your fingers on the screen your eyebrows furrow as you read a text message.

Need to talk to you asap.

Meet me by our lockers.

Is everything okay? You texted back, chewing on your bottom lip and waiting for him to reply.

Yeah, just something I have to talk to you about.

Your eyebrows furrowed into confusion. What the hell was so important that you had to leave class? Sighing and shaking your head, you raised your hand and asked the teacher if you could use the restroom. Once dismissed you quickly started walking to where your and Dean’s lockers were.

Not even halfway to the lockers you suddenly gasped as a hand latched onto your bicep and pulled you into a room. A hand covered your mouth before you could scream, and your back slammed against the door as you felt the body warmth radiating off the person holding you.

Suddenly the person flicked on the light and you relaxed as you realized who it was.

“What the hell, Dean?!” your voice came out muffled before whacking his hand away from your mouth. “Why are we in a janitor’s closet?”

“Because I needed to talk to you in private.” Dean responded, seeming a tad nervous. Your eyebrows furrowed in confusion as you watched him sigh before running a hand through his hair out of stress.

“Okay…and we gotta talk in a janitor’s closet?” you giggled but noticed how Dean wasn't going to relax anytime soon. As you realized he was either stressed out about something or sad, your smile faded into a frown.

“Dean?” your voice was soft, just above a whisper. “Are you okay?”

Dean sighed again before dropping his hand. “Yeah, I-” he stopped himself as he tried to think of the best possible way to confess his biggest secret. Deep green orbs finally burned into yours for the first time since study hall.

Dean’s shoulders relaxed as he took in the sight of you. A small amount of pink dusted your cheeks and the way you were looking at him with those big beautiful eyes caused Dean’s heart to flutter in his chest. Running his tongue along his bottom lip, Dean fought against the voices in his head before he couldn't take it anymore and muttered a “fuck it”

Surprise and confusion flickered over your features before Dean rushed forward, cupped both sides of your face, and smashed his lips down onto yours. Shock initially caused your body to stiffen before you realized that you were kissing the guy you’d been in love with for years. Dean’s lips were soft and the butterflies in your stomach caused your body to feel electric.

Finally, you kissed him back and instantly melted into the kiss. Dean groaned into your mouth, thankful that he hadn't just ruined everything. Sparks ignite in both of their bodies as their lips move against each other. It's slow and extremely sensual at first but quickly develops into a sloppy and desperate exchange.

Dean’s warm hands pull you impossibly closer and he deepens the kiss. A groan of satisfaction rumbles through his chest as you involuntarily let out a small moan. The noise was like music to his ears and was better than what he’d dreamed you’d sound like, fueling the fire already burning inside.

“God sweetheart, I've been wanting to tell you for so long.” Dean managed to confess in between kisses, completely drunk on the taste of you. “I’ve been in love with you since we first became friends.”

“Me too.” you managed to get out in between kissing Dean and catching your breath. “Fuck I always thought about you while reading my books.”

Dean let out a mixture of a growl and a groan at the thought of you reading such dirty little things and imagining him doing those things to you. Only now he could get what he wanted and he was going to get it today whether or not the whole school heard you scream his name.

Reconnecting their lips in a desperate and messy effort, Dean snaked his hand down and popped the button to your jeans loose. Your eyes immediately rolled into the back of your head as his fingers made contact with your clit.

A moan filled the small space as you threaded your fingers through Dean’s hair, tilting your head to the side a little as his mouth placed kisses along your neck.

“Is this all for me?” Dean asked, groaning at the feeling of the amount of you coating his fingers. “If I would’ve known you were so turned on at the thought of me fucking you, I would've done it a long time ago.” Dean admitted but you only responded with a moan as he slipped a finger inside your entrance.

You rocked your hips down on his hand wanting nothing more than to relieve the ache between your legs. A second finger slipped inside of you before you could even manage to get a word out. The only word you managed to get out was Dean’s name as he fucked you with his fingers.

“I’m almost—” You started to whine and tell him that you were close but before you hit your high he quickly pulled his hand out of your jeans.

“I've waited too long for this.” Dean reconnected his lips to yours before breaking away and fiddling with his belt. “I wanna watch you come for the first time around my cock.”

Your eyes immediately locked into his and he worked his way out of his belt. You could only clench your thighs together as you watched him take the belt off with one hand before Dean gripped the side of your hip and spun you to face the door. Gasped at the feeling of being pressed up against the door and Dean right behind you. The rustling of his jeans sounded from behind you before you felt his large hands reach in front of you and pull your zipper down. Gripping the jeans on either side of your hips, Dean yanked your jeans down to your ankles and slipped them off but left your panties on.

“We’re gonna leave these on.” Dean’s voice sounded gruff as he placed a hand down on your back, bending you over.

You instantly gasped as you felt the tip of him brush over your folds, causing you to whine as he teased you. “Dean don't play with me right now. I need you.”

You heard no reply before he suddenly slammed into you. Gasping as he stretched you out, you melted as he started thrusting in and out of you. The feeling was absolutely euphoric as he continued, causing you to say his name over and over again like a prayer.

Dean groaned as he felt you clench around him, knowing you were close. Quickly pulling out and spinning you around, he slammed you up against the door and whispered “Jump.” Tapping both sides of your hips to encourage you. You jumped and he caught you. Immediately he pushed himself back into you and fucked up into you. “Wanna see your pretty face when I see you make a mess around me.” Dean’s words fueled the fire within you and caused your ache to grow.

“Dean.” you moaned, not able to think of any other words than his name. The coils in your stomach tighten before you finally come undone around him. Dean finds your lips fast, picking up his pace to ride you through your high. The feeling of her pulsing around him sends Dean to fall out of rhythm as he sloppily snaps his hips against hers. His face buries into her neck as he feels himself unravel inside of her, the feeling of warm liquid filling her insides as the two turn into a moaning mess, painting her inner walls white.

“I love you,” Dean admits as he connects his lips to yours gently. “I’m in love with you.”

A drunken smile lazily spreads across your lips as you watch Dean’s eyes soften and stare at you with hooded eyes. “I love you too, De.” You confess, still feeling the butterflies fluttering around in your stomach, tickling your insides.

“So you wanna recreate some of those scenes from your book later?” Dean’s small smile shifts into a smirk as he recalls googling the rest of the smut scenes in your book. He'd been curious to know what other things you’d read besides the small snippet he skimmed across.

“Actually, I’d love nothing more.” A smirk of your own spread across your lips, matching his energy. “I have a few different scenarios I wanna try.”

Dean’s eyebrows raised at your new attitude. “I’m so happy I caught you reading sex scenes.”

You giggled before informing him of the term. “It's called smut, Dean.”

“Whatever.” Dean rolled his eyes before bringing his lips back down onto yours.

more of my works here!

tag list: @freeluigihesbae @lieutenantchaos

[simp-ly-writes]

The Comments Section (pt.8)

─────── · · A Social Media AU Fic

Pairing: Spencer Agnew x gn!Reader

─ · · SUMMARY: after taking some time away from the spotlight, you return to surprise friends and fans alike with your more recent updates...

─ · · TAGS: gender-neutral pronouns, slowburn, fluff, light angst, cheesiness, friends that act like lovers, friends to lovers, mutual pining, attempt at humour, social media au.

─ · · MASTERLIST | TAGLIST REQUEST | PART SIX | PART SEVEN | PART NINE

─ · · A/N: can't believe its been over a month since the last update, sorry about that y'all 😬 but hope you enjoy this part!

─────── · ·

🔔 (name)s_username just posted for the first time in awhile.

─────── · ·

Liked by co_mill, spennser, sydney_sweeney, and others

(name)s_username Hey... so it's been awhile. I've taken time away from the internet and from the cameras to focus on myself and on my relationships and in that time I realized how far I was pushing myself and other's away from me.

I will be taking a step away from my on-screen role(s) at Smosh since it is not fair to you, the fans or to anyone working at Smosh to work around my schedule. I will try and make guest appearances if I can and I'm sorry if I ever got your hopes up for things to go back to where they started but I hope that at least some of you will come out to support my new projects and I understand fully if you cannot.

Thank you to my team, my friends at Smosh, Sydney and Glen, and to Spencer for always being there for me. I know that I have not been myself these past few months but I think I'm finally finding what I need so stay tuned for a more happy update later lol.

Love you all!

View all 7,342 comments

username01 Always supported you and always will, (name)! Hope you find what you're looking for 💕

co_mill gonna miss having you, bestie! But I can already see how much happier you are and that makes me happy! 😊

↳ (name)s_username you're so sweet. I'll miss you too, bestie! 🥹🫶

username44 eh, still does not make up for everything. I felt like you used Spencer and Smosh to make your "career."

username70 Mixed feeling about this but wishing you the best!

anthonypadilla your dads are here to give you a virtual hug goodbye, so here it is!

↳ ian_hecox yeah, best hug you ever had here: ↳ (name)s_username I can feel it! 🤣

username22 I don't know about you, but I'm feeling dust in my eyes! I'm sad to see (name) go but if they can be like an Olivia or Keith- I can live with that ❤️

angelagiovanagiarratana wait so you're LEAVING? WTF GUYS why does nobody ever tell me anything?!? Like good for you bestie, you get that mental health back on track but seriously? I had to come here from twitter to learn this 😭

↳ (name)s_username Girl! I left you a voice memo yesterday 👀 ↳ angelagiovanagiarratana oh shit, I thought that was spam 😬 ↳ username30 OMG LMAO!!! 🤣

username88 I was so worried about you! Happy to know you're back on the up and up again 💕

shayne_topp you're gonna kill it out there but you'll always have a seat at smosh cast to tell me and Amanda all about it!

↳ (name)s_username give me a month or two and I will be there lol ↳ shayne_topp counting on it!

filmingamanda happy post you say? 😉

tomeybones who's gonna cry with my in the bathroom now??

spennser 🫶

↳ (name)s_username 🫶

─────── · ·

🔔 SmoshGames just uploaded! Turn off notifications here.

─────── · ·

Thank you (Name)!

Smosh Games ✓ [Subscribed] 👍 4k | 👎 7.75M subscribers 1.1M views 2 days ago #2 on trending a complication of (name) moments from over the years... click to expand

5,992 Comments

⚲ Pinned by Creator Smosh Games ✓ From a decade of on and off-camera shenanigans, everyone here at Smosh wishes (name) the very best! (even though we are jealous others get to work with them too). Be sure to comment your favourite memory/moment of (name)!

username01 this feels like a bad break-up since you're still in love with them lol 😭

↳ username61 you know that this is going to happen with everyone one day but you never expect today. fuck i'm going to miss them. * [this comment has been censored for interfering with Youtube's Community Guidelines; for more information press HERE]

username30 everyone is out here acting like they died. PEOPLE (NAME) IS GOING TO COME BACK FOR SPECIALS DONT WORRY! god.

username24 I still think back to that hide and seek video, I hope that future update comfirms (yourshipname) for good!

username77 "don't cry because it's over, smile because it happened"

username11 (name) falling over and accidentally discovering what is cake by face plant will never not be the best moment on this channel 🤣

username40 where are all the "#imdonewith(name)" people now?? Sure to have changed their tune quickly...

(yourshipname)updates ✓ any moment with (name) and Spencer is a certified classic for Smosh. I mean they are the Shayne and Courtney of nerds.

username09 I was so scared that (name) was going to fall into that Hollywood lifestyle... happy yo know that they're still there.

username52 "this isn't goodbye, it's see you later" - and I'm counting on it for (name)'s return!

─────── · ·

🔔 (name)s_username just posted, check it out!

─────── · ·

Liked by spennser, ian_hecox, tomeybones and others

(name)s_username good company, 9/10, could have talked more about movies but was too caught up on video games. idk if I would recommend for anyone else 😬

View all 3,229 comments

username01 (name) be having the most aesthetic blog possible in this new era and I'm here for it 💕

spennser decided to take out the image of my soul-crushing win?

↳ (name)s_username no! I left it in right beside you almost face planting if you scroll to the left 😄 ↳ spennser ☹️ ↳ (name)s_username 😂 ↳ username40 I seriously cannot tell if this is a soft launch or them just being dumbasses again...

username80 just two friends spending casual friend time together... right? right? right? 👀

damien_Hass why wasn't I invited??? you know how much I love bowling!

↳ (name)s_username next time 100%!

filmingamanda I think I used to work in a bowling alley... then again maybe it was mini golf place. Anyways cute pictures!!

username30 eh, I'll count this as a win for (yourshipname).

username00 WHY ARE WE ALL SO CALM, THIS IS A SOFT LAUNCH PEOPLE. A. SOFT. LAUNCH. You heard it here first, folks!

username11 waiting on Spencers post now to confirm it but AAAAAHHHHHHHHHH. Has the angst finally stopped for some fluff???

username16 Love how all the regular comments are being stationed at the top for us shippers to be down in the trenches analyzing every image.

username19 " idk if I would recommend for anyone else..." mhmm yup, you take that man!

─────── · ·

🔔 This post is getting a lot of likes! Check it out!

─────── · ·

Liked by (name)s_username, anthonypadilla, filmingamanda and others

spennser do the math- the answer's probably right.

View all 7,002 comments

(name)s_username so lets see here, college meet-up + years working together - a few years and months apart x some texts = ...

↳ spennser I mean I would format it a bit differently but I came to the same conclusion 🤷 ↳ username60 now they are just playing with us, what is this curelty??!?! Spit. it. out. already. please!

username24 so the answer I got was "and then they kissed," am I right?

username00 I've always hated math.

↳ tomeybones fuck! someone already took my caption!

co_mill the math is mathing so hard rn.

shayne_topp so... beopordy (math edition) next?

username01 only real fans will remember that 1st picture 🫶

filimgamanda I've never felt older in a comment's section till now, WTF is a "soft launch"

↳ ian_hecox ummm, its when Nasa tries to send off something or something like that ↳ filimgamanda oh, okay! ↳ username40 its like watching two robots communicate with one another 😭 ↳ username10 not another Harambe situation again!!

username43 Alexa? please order me another three bottles of wine. we're gonna need them...

─────── · ·

─ · · A/N: only two more parts to go!

─ · · SPENCER AGNEW TAGLIST: @lisiliely @missflufffanfics @little-stitious-studios @thejourneyneverendsx @sibsteria @lizzylynch1 @babble2 @delaneyburghardt @thevintagefangirl @uniquely-haunting @maricarorp @sarahskywalker-amidala @laurasdrey

[tadhannahj]

hey @vancityreynolds

it's never too late to join the off-screen besties and on-screen lovers dynamic

[anomaly-hivemind]

Glad to hear your doing alright and i figured you would be tired with kinktober so it's alright take your time to write my request

The longer I wait the more I know it's gonna be good❤️

And good it is because your request is FINALLY DONE. We were taking out sweet time making sure its perfect. ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

Monster’s Congregation

Tags: non human genitalia, Gangbang, Bukkake, Rough Sex, impregnation, breeding, pregnancy, Overstimulation, Come as Lube praise kink, creampie, size kink, Size difference, face fucking, multiple orgasm, Piv, manhandling, groping, large cock, spitroasting, monster fucking, monster fucker, monster lover, monster x reader, teratophilia Voyeurism, biting, marking cunnilingus, knotting, double pentration, double pentration in one hole, free use, cock warming. body worship

You were watching a movie, gushing over the nonhuman character, not caring in the world about whether your friend was judging or not. Who cares if it's not human, it's sentient enough to be able to take you on its own account. If only they were real, you sigh as you think on the borderline depressing though. You’ve had an odd interest in them for as long as you can remember.

“I want that in me!” You exclaimed, grabbing hold and shaking your best friend over and over again. Who looked at you with an amused face.

“That's an alien babes.” You both look at the screen as the monster throws one of the side characters into the wall with great force.

“Exactly. A sexy sexy alien,” You flop into their lap with a whine, and she holds back a snort.

“Be careful what you wish for; you never know what's listening in.” Jay pets your head as if you were a house cat or anything with your opinion of cute enough to make an attempt to pet.

“Well, I'm manifesting this shit. I want a bunch of monsters on… sideways, upwards downwards, filling my holes all at once, now. If only! My kinks would be satisfied with only this one wish!” you ramble on for a little while, thinking about your wish and hoping to have it come true if only in your dreams so you could jill about it later.

“That's really what you want?” Jay asked you in a dry tone, almost like they didn't care. You poke their perfect face in annoyance.

“You could at least humor me a little” “I'll get you something for your birthday.” Jay gives you a half smile as they speak.

You smiled at them as they told you this, you couldn't be happier. “Like something from Bad Dragons?! Wait wait! I don’t wanna know, don't tell me. I want it to be a surprise,” You giggled as you thought of all the things that your best friend could come up with for your birthday.

You spend a couple of hours together as you continue to watch the movies until you doze off and fall asleep in Jay’s lap. They watch you sleep for a bit with glowing eyes and a smirk on their face.

When you wake up it's in your bed and you get up and head to your kitchen, to see Jay preparing a bunch of stuff in your kitchen, and half of it is stored in a couple of containers. They were cooking breakfast and lunch and maybe even some dinner as we were having some kind of cookout.

“Jay, what are you doing?” Your voice catches their attention and they look over to you with a smile.

“Happy birthday hun,” Jay goes back to making stuff.

“Thank you... So what are you doing?” you repeated and stepped closer only to trip over an ice cooler.

“I’m preparing your birthday gift, obviously, we're going on a trip. “ you roll your eyes.

“In our favorite rocket ship?

“No, now get dressed, we have to load all this in my car. “

You get dressed in your best and slutty outfit for your birthday, thinking that you might be going to a little house party with a few other friends that you know. You head back into the kitchen and smile at your friend who is staring at you with some kind of hidden emotion before cutting off the stove. Jay gives you a container of breakfast food and a water bottle. You dig into the food, always loving your bestie's cooking and you are starving. Jay finished packing everything up and put them in bags ready to be carried to their car.

After you were done with the food you helped with grabbing everything to put in the car. You loaded up and then got in the car with Jay getting in the driver seat. Jay takes you to another friend's house and you see her lovely house. You both get there but Jay only takes out a few things for the party and tells you to leave the rest. You still have a shit ton of things left in the car, like a bunch of water and some foods that didn’t need to be heated or chilled much or at all for that matter. You get some cake, chat with your friends a bit, and play a few games before Jay pulls you to the side.

“You are ready to leave, I still have to give you your birthday gift.” Jay put a hand on the swell of your back as they whispered in your ear over the music. It makes you shiver a bit as you look over at them with an excited glint in your eyes.

“Yes let's dip right now” You almost bounced in place. You yell goodbye to everyone before anyone can try to convince you both to stay any longer. You book it to the car and Jay starts to drive off, Jay tells you to take a little nap because it is going to be a long trip in your sleep you don’t see the car teleport.

You look to be in the middle of a dirt path in a dense forest. You looked over to a focused Jay who seemed to not be worried about where you both were so you didn’t worry either. Jay had their hand on your thigh, which seemed to travel upward slowly, you woke up fully and looked at their hand, slender fingers digging into your inner thigh lightly.

“We're here.” Jay looked over to you after stopping the car; you gave them a confused look. This was just a clearing in the middle of nowhere, in the forest.

“Where is here?”

“I have a lot I need to tell you first, but it’s easier to show you.” Jay gets out of the car and the curiosity causes you to follow after them.

Jay stands in the center of the open field and looks at a set of trees that curved into an archway. It was kinda hot out here if you were being honest. There was no one around for miles and no one looked like they have even been out here before.

“What are you going to show me, Jay?”

“I am a fay… well a pixie to be more specific.” You looked at them in confusion, at their words.

“Like you're into men?” Jay looked at you with twitching eyes before rolling there at your statement.

“No bitch, I’m a supernatural being.” They shake their heads and before your eyes, they start to change.

Their bodies ripped out of their clothes, and they grew unnaturally fast, while also changing to a pale whitish almost iridescent color. The white of their eyes turned black and their hair grew longer. Jay’s ears grew and moth-like wings formed from their back. You can’t help but stare, because they are so pretty and very creepy, you were looking them up and down when you saw the large appendage between their legs and your eyes widened before placing your hands in front of your face and peaking from between your fingers.

“Woo. That's a dick” You can’t take your eyes off of the mystical shaft, which was literally sparkling and glistening.

“You seem to be so surprised.” Jay’s voice was a bit deeper than it was before.

“Are you my birthday gift?” You also felt a bit hot and maybe that you were dreaming.

“No, but I can't let you have all the fun, and you're going to help me get your actual gift.” you both ignore how quick you came to terms with your best-friend being a supernatural being.

“So what's my actual gift” you may or may not have been drooling a bit as you stare at the curves of his veins creating ridges along their shimmering rod.

“I’m going to open a portal for your monsterfucker dreams to come true and summon all of them to take you. They’ll be happy to breed you like you always wanted, and then once that's completed they can stay in this world permanently.” Jay explained to you in a casual tone about what they planned out for you and you can’t help but blink for a comment.

“You're pulling my leg” You watch them shake their heads.

“No, I was actually elected for this little project, to find a home for many species like me to find a stable planet from a higher power. You are only the start of something much bigger. So happy birthday, hun,”

“Yeah, happy birthday to me, can we get started then?” You take a step closer to Jay, who’s much taller than before.

“Gladly” Jay puts you on the hood of the car with a quickness, you shiver from the cold feeling of metal.

Jay pulled your pants off and let them fall onto the ground, any attempt to close your legs was pointless with the strength Jay was using to keep them open for their exploration. They bite down on the meat of your thigh and you jump a little. Jay makes a trail of wet kisses up to your clothed core, Jay’s eyes staring up at you before they place an open mouth kiss onto your panties. You moan as you feel their tongue soaking your underwear only getting the faintest taste of you dripping behind the fabric. It stuck to your folds like duck tape and you wanted it off. To feel Jay’s actual tongue teasing your entrance instead of pushing your panties between your lower lips.

“Please take them off”

“You sure might forget to control myself and actually do the spell,” Jay smirked as their sharp nail pulled at the seam of your underwear.

“Yes, please.” Jay nods before ripping your panties off and pulls any random bits of fabric from under your ass.

Jay then brings your hips up to meet their face halfway, you are lifted off the hood when their long slimy tongue pushes deep into your pussy. A loud pleased moan escapes you as you feel the fat of your tendril-like tongue slide in and out of you, before finding a place on your clit. It was like it made you see stars and all they did was suck on it a little. You try your best to keep still but your body had other plans as it made futile attempts to squirm.

Jay starts creating symbols over your clit and you feel like something new is running through your veins. It was like the body inside of you was being set ablaze with every flick and shape Jay carefully created with their tongue. The ground started to vibrate and cracks formed into the earth, causing things to shift and pop to life. You felt yourself getting close to a climax. You pull at one of Jay’s ears and they let out a wince-like groan but stop eating you out. You feel dizzy but, at the same time, you are getting some boost in energy. Jay was literally performing magic using your pussy. You had the half in mind to look around you and open your eyes, you could see something akin to a rift forming and growing. Sucking in air at the same time you moaned out in pleasure.

As your body started to shake and tremble a large archway which was pulsing with energy opened, you only caught a hazy view of what looked like armageddon before a small cluster of beings you could only describe as monsters from the shows you liked appeared. Once they all stepped out, the rift closed, and as you were still coming down from your high. You with shaking arms sit up to get a better look at their forms

You reluctantly let Jay pull away from your wet cunt as they turned to greet the monsters that seemed to be quite buddy-buddy with each of them. You pull yourself together and sit up to watch this all go down. Each of them came up to you, and in front of you were nine monsters.

The oni comes up to you first, letting out a grumble before picking you up and putting you on the ground with surprising care, you giggled. A mix of nervousness and excitement as you looked at the massive body that was in front of you.

The oni was shaped like a man but you can tell he was far from it, that much you can tell. He had large manly hands and his nails were sharp. beastly in human form, body littering in shades of grays and reds, while his hair was a mix of blacks and sprinkled whites.

He was wearing a traditional Japanese montsuki but there were also parts of armor that were wrapped around his waist and on his shoulders. He had long pointed ears and long curved horns that headed at least a few inches to his already large height. The oni was around seven feet tall. He had wild glowing yellow eyes and shaped teeth where his canines curved up and out and the bottom went downward. Along with a pepper-colored beard that fits his chin.

“Can I get a name big guy, you know before you tear into me”

“Baru’bane” He muttered before pushing a thick finger into your hole, feeling the wetness of your cunt before pulling it out and putting his finger in his mouth. He frees himself just enough to see the angry red of his fat thick cock.

The sight of it makes your pussy throb with desire and you can't help but try and part your legs open to show that. They all get a look at how wet you are, eyeing you with hunger and impatience as if they were all going to pounce on you at any moment.

Baru’bane grips your ankles and holds them together with one hand. He pushes his red cock into your tight hole. A loud moan erupts from you, in sync with the groans of the oni now fully inside of you. Jay was watching with a smirk from the car hood. Your open mouth moaning out with each thrust was a begging invitation that the group jumped at the opportunity.

Your mouth is filled with the warm flesh of the being you could only describe as a werewolf. He was huge like the rest of the monsters that had come to your world, towering at almost nine feet tall, bulky, and covered in fur from head to clawed toes. His face had shorter hair, a snout like a wolf, and eyes like a hungry beast. Muscles bulging shrouded in fur and hair which was everywhere on him.

You looked up at the beast with teary eyes at them as he pushed his way into your mouth, gagging around him as he stretched your jaw and you could only moan as you tried to help in letting him thrust his wide knot into you. He lets out a sound akin to a howl when he finally manages to get it into your mouth.

“Since he doesn't seem to care about the introductions, I'll do the rest to save you all the trouble of asking,” Jay smirks when you try to look over at them only for the werewolf to hold your face in place. You were feeling like you were in a cloud of nice being thrust into from both ends when you heard Jay speak, you did your best to pay attention and hear what they had to say.

“ Jasindrik is the werewolf for starters, Tegarozann the minotaur, Motoros the shadow breast, Valqoba the Beastman, Naziros the dragon, he's Dakalba a top predator alien species, Urosebira pretty boy type of an elf race, and of course Nodagha the Orc.” Jay listed everyone, and you did your best to look at them while being thrust from both ends.

Baru’bane feels you clenched around him, he groans, getting ready to fill you with his seed. he lifts you up, tilting your body upright so he can fuck into you harder. You get pushed down on Jasindrik as he gets forced deeper down your throat, face deep in his fur. you gagged around him, muffled moans trying to escape and failed to do so. You feel dizzy as an orgasm ripples throughout your body.

You get filled up with the one's thick load, coating your walls in white. Your legs shake here and there and you get a second of respite when he pulls out if you. Jasindrik pulls out of your mouth and slams his cock, knot deep back inside your lips so you can take his finish, filling you up with his werewolf cum. You let out a cry as he slowly pulls out with a loud wet pop coughing up the cum you couldn't swallow.

You try to catch your breath now being empty of men, you take this moment to think about how happy you were and hoping it wasn’t a dream you would wake up from. You were limp on the ground soaking up the breaking you were having. You were covered in sweat and other bodily fluids and you were a bit thirsty and could use a food break. This is what you do for the next thirty minutes as you have time to eat everything, so your body could recover for a second.

You watched as Tegarozann would inch forward ever so often until his large bull-like head was nuzzling against you. He was quite precious looking, his wandering touches light as he made sure not to poke your eyes out with his long hours. You can’t help yourself from feeling him up, touching his brown rays of fluff, his plush stomach, and his tail that curled around your wrist causing you to giggle.

“So pretty” Tegarozann licks your neck causing you to shiver, his highland horns had rings of jewelry on them.

“You're one to talk to, you're so cute.” you can’t resist the urge to run through his hair and pat him like a kid with a new pet.

You pushed his hair from his face looking into his hazel eyes, his hand rubbed at your bare skin, gripping your thighs as he lifted you onto his lap. You tried to look back at him, only for his flat tongue to run up your face. You tense up as you feel his flattened tip stretch you open, you moan as he slides you down his thick length. You scream at the feeling of him sliding deeper than anything you've ever taken, your body feeling split open as he finds a way to enter your womb. You cry, your mind feeling blank as if every shift of Tegarozann’s movement was erasing any thoughts.

He fucks into you from behind, your body against his chest as you hold put by your thighs. Your legs were shaking and your pussy was grippy. Clenching tightly around the cock that literally created a bulge inside you with each womb thrust. Your legs were up by your head and he had you bound against his body. So much for the gentle giant you thought he was a moment ago. You babble incoherent sounds of what you think were sentences. They were not but you have no way to tell. You lost count of how many orgasms you've had since this all started and there's no point in starting now.

You feel him throbbing inside you, knowing he was close after a few minutes or hours of being inside your gate-opening cooch. You feel like you could cum all over again, you were gushing around him, and each impact of his thrust worked to make you dizzy and lightheaded as it kept knocking the wind out of you.

The full Nelson he had you in making it so all you could do was simply take every inch he pumped in and out of you. When you feel his cock comes to a standstill you can feel the amount of his cum filling your stuffed womb. He pulls out when one last moan as he carefully places you on the ground. You whip away the drool that had dripped from your mouth and look at the next monster that was getting ready to take you.

Naziros crawls over to you, his dragon features make you a little nervous but all the more turned on. His wings create a shadow over your form as he moves on top of you basically scooping you off the ground. His black scales shimmered in the setting sun, causing them to actually look purple. His tail pulls you, holding you towards his waist. You try to grab at the tail around your waist, merely trying to get it to loosen up. Naziros takes to this as you are trying to escape and growls at you, a loud bellowing sound as he glares at you with bright orange eyes. You gasped as his grip tightened around you, pressing your stomach down, you thought that it wouldn't be that much of a big deal until he started to penetrate you.

You don’t have anything left to cry, your voice is hoarse and your mind is tipping back into the void space. Naziros has not one but two dicks and he was fully determined to make sure that your womb would have all of his seed. You feel the dual tips wriggling their way into your sensitive walls making you panic a little.

“Wait wai- wait” you stammered, but your pleas were left unheard.

Naziros bottoms off into you, tickling your cervix just enough to feel like he was gonna slip inside if he tilted you. He had one clawed hand holding your arms between your chest as you got thrust into with vigor. You didn’t think you would last long, as you feel the cluster of monster fucks catching up to you as you start to go in and out of consciousness. His cocks rubbed against each other as he was fully inside you. Puffs of black smoke left his maw here and there as he reveled in his pleasure.

The tight grip on your waist pushed your walls against his dragon shlongs. It was a lot and it was taking you out. He nips at you, biting at your exposed flesh to claim you before he fills you with his seamen. You cry as everything starts to hurt you a bit and you run out of orgasms to have. Your body trembles and you pant and heave. You feel like you are about to die as he finishes inside of you and unwraps his tail around you.

“No more, no” You cry out weakly as it comes out as a shaky whisper.

You pass out, and everyone is still hungry for more. --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

You wake up thinking you were feeling phantom strokes from the day before but that was not the case. Motoros was using his floating cocks to fill you to the brim. He uses his disembodied hands to hold you up, suspended upside down, legs spread open, as two different glowing blue-tipped cocks forced entry into your abused pussy, while another was pushing into your mouth and ass respectively and then the final one used your hand to jerk itself off. You moan around his appendage letting the shadow beast know that he has awakened you from your once peaceful slumber.

“Finally awake, are you darling?” His reverberated voice seemed like it had more than one set of sounds to it. His glowing blue eyes and mouth were gleaming with amusement and chuckled as he sped up the pace of his disjointed cocks.

You whimper around, and you feel like the cock that was trying to reach your throat was a choking hazard as you really think if he really wanted to he could go very far into your esophagus, then again his balls would stop that right? He had different rhythms for each cock inside of you and it was an all kind of overwhelming feeling.

Your eyes rolled back in your head and all the cocks finished like a set of dominoes. The one in your ass, then one in your hand which manages to shoot onto your face and chest, one in your pussy, and finally the one in your mouth. You get dropped with a thud, and spasm as you come down from yet another climax. You open your eyes and see that Motoros’ cum is like movie ectoplasm; a glowing greenish-blue color.

“Need some help. “ Jay and Urosebira walk over to you with a couple of napkins and help you clean. you give them a nod and enjoy your downtime while it lasts. letting them clean the sweat and cum off your body.

“There you go, all decent”. Urosebira said while ripping his strawberry red locks dramatically as it caught some wind time. A unique contrast to his purple skin, his eyes matching more of his hair than his skin, he was looking at you with an enthralled gaze.

“ Now it's fine for us to mess you back up with us,” Jay smirks as they massage your hair, and pull you back on their lap. you look up at them.

“Besides you owe me these lips” Jay traces your lips slowly as they part your lips with their thumb. You part your mouth and let them slide, their fingers into your mouth gliding against your tongue. Jay let's have a slightly amused breath, meanwhile, Urosebira makes a home seated between your thighs.

You suck on Jay’s fingers, while Urosebira spreads your folds open before his easy insertion. Urosebira slides his slender and smooth cock. He moves forward until he can't anymore. you whimper around Jay’s fingers which were slick with spit. He sits up so he pats your face with his pretty cock. Your mind escaping you after all the countless cocks that have claimed me over and over.

Urosebira gets fully seated inside with a sultry pant that causes you to clench around you. He had you twisted waist down sideways. One of your legs up against his chest as he started to roll his hips. Your upper body has you laying a bit on your chest as you suck Jay off. Causing you to have to contort to please both of them properly. You shudder when Urosebira starts to circle your clit in tune with his thrust.

Jay massages one of your nipples as he fucks your face. Switching between the others to give them both attention. They plunged into you over and over at an alternating pace. They eventually start to pick up their pace as they get closer to filling your holes. you along with them getting closer and closer. Urosebira puts more pressure on your clit. You whine around Jay as you fall into your climax. They work you through your peak, gently.

“You did so well for us” Urosebira coos as he pulls out of your filled pussy.

“Pretty sound honey. makes me want to do more with you” Jay pulls out of your mouth and learns to kiss your forehead.

You smile at them, really pretty decent and like you could go again. But this thought is seemingly not a good one. When you see a certain beast pull you with an aggressive yank in his direction. Dakalba holds you down, his tough bumpy skin of the predator.

His unnatural mouth clicks with mandibles as a growl rumbles within him. Dakalba's claws dug into your skin, scratching his way up to wrapping his hand tightly around your neck. Your heart was racing with fear and adrenaline, but also excitement. You almost screamed when you felt him ram his ridge-covered cock. The bumps add a confusing pleasure within you. His hip was like a thick flower pushing at every spot you could have.

His thrust was rough from the start, it caused you to squirm or at least you tried to. His cock is on the line of sensory heaven and hell as he pounds into you. He heads using your body to move you on his cock treating you like a fleshlight. He had a tight grip on you and you can't escape. One hand was moving you up and down his cock and the other hand was around your neck which was definitely getting together.

You whimper as you get dizzy and Dakalba basically starts to choke you. Grabbing his hand around your neck you try to pull it off of you even if just a little. Instead, he leans down and bites you.

“ow ow ow” You cried out a bit and you clenched around his cock. You looked at the drops of your blood dripping down from the mark. His mandibles find a new place to mark you up and draw blood. Dakalba picks up his already ruthless pace. His claws ripped into your back and you swear you start to see spots in your vision. He controls the angles of your body by treating you like a rag doll and choking you out everything you tried to move on your own.

He slams his hips over last time as he cums inside you, licking your wounds and working you from a lightheaded orgasm. You go limp and complicit after he pulls away from you with a couple of what you assume are happy clicks, leaving you alone.

“Oh that looked like a lot, are you okay?” Nodagha asked even though he had an amused look on his face, looking at all the scratches and bruises along your body.

“Everything is intake… I think” you muttered with a nod.

“How about I take you over here for a somewhat secluded spot for lunch and a break.” Nodagha picked you up and brought you to a new spot.

Nodagha holds you upside down, you dangling in his grasp as he has your legs on his shoulders. you wrap your lips around his cock, sucking him eagerly. He tilts your hips to meet his mouth as he starts to eat you out. Nodagha tusk rubs against your thighs. you moan against his cock as you take him as far as you can, boring your head along his length. Nodagha’s fat tongue laps up your juices with a growing hunger. You were dizzy from being upside down for so long but you don't care.

You keep slurping his meat, gargling his taste like it was a defined taste you needed in you. your legs spasmed as you got closer to what felt like your hundredth orgasm. He rocked his hips into your face as he reached an end. He eats you out to completion. He bends you over and pulls out of your mouth. He rams his hips into your wet pussy letting you have the fruit of your mouth’s efforts. You let out one final moan as he cums inside you.

“How about we get you some actual food?” Nodagha laughs a bit as he pulls out of you with a sloppy sound. A smile on his face as he gets ready to try and feed you.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

After many rounds, you feel like you need to break and everyone is still so needy for you. When they pull away from you, this is your chance to try to run off. Shaking legs only carry you so far before they give out, dropping to the ground. You then use your arms and try to army crawl away which only aids in you feeling chagrined. You still try to get away like a wounded animal. This also triggers the animalistic beast to tap into their instinct and pounce on you and claim your pussy one after another. You were sure that they were gonna eat you.

Valqoba being one of those beastmen, he reminded you of a large wild cat. He had a lot of energy and he was coming back for more after everyone else had gone after you. He pulled you into his lap, holding you like a bride in his arms. your legs pulled together and you knew what he wanted. You tilted your head and grabbed his cock from under you and helped guide him to your heat.

He bounced you up and down his shaft, stopping just before his knot couldn't force its way inside you, like a slight teasing notion that you couldn't help but clench around him. Valqoba picked up the pace, leaning his head down to suck on your breast. A loud bellow escapes your lips and you wrap a hand in his fur.

“You're so perfect for this” Valqoba mumbled against your skin as he continued to bite and suck the closest parts of you to his face.

He pulls you deeper onto him, his knot moving in and out of you with several of you with wet pops. Valqoba was getting close and so were you. His movements are getting frenzy and rougher with you. However, he made sure to litter you with kisses and mutter soft praises in your ear. You both reached your peak together in a harmonized sound. You feel him paint your inside, talking to you as you come down from your high.

He was still inside of you, his knot seated within you, he had you on your side as his little spoon and was kissing your shoulder and neck. Valqoba made sure that you were resting comfortably, laying on the softness of his fluffy tail. It was like a warm pillow, and you quickly fell asleep next toValqoba. When you woke up he was still inside of you, still petting you, and still kissing your exposed skin while praising you softly. It was enough for you to fall right back asleep and snuggled up with him.

By the time you woke up empty, you had just been looking up at the sky after all your encounters, staring at the setting sun, with no will to move. You were full of joy with the whole encounter and this was the best birthday week you could ever ask for and it will be one that you remember forever. You were limp on a little blanket, just enjoying the warm air on your naked body, making you shiver a bit. You have never been more thoroughly fucked like this ever. Nothing could or ever compare to this and you had no regrets. You watched as several shadows surrounded you.

“I think we're in need of a celebration of what's to come” You look around at all of them stroking themselves.

You enjoy the view of all of them about you. Using your image to get off to you, full of their cum. They stare at your naked sweaty body like you are a fine cuisine. You were drooling a bit, holding your mouth open ready to lap up any cum that would land close enough to your open mouth. You listen to each sound they make as they get closer to their final release for the night. You watch them shoot their loads onto you, and you giggle, relaxing as the warm liquid lands on you.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

In about a month's time you noticed you were getting kinda pudgy, you supposed that you had been eating more than usual but not enough to have your stomach poking out like this. Were you… pregnant? The timing matched up but showing this early?

So you did only what you knew to be the right decision and went to ask Jay.

“Hey, Mamas, you’re sure glowing today,” Jay said as they leaned on the counter and ate an apple.

“Is that you being yourself or am I actually pregnant?” You asked.

“Oh, you’re pregnant alright, after all the breeding you went through there was no way you weren’t going to end up with a bun in the oven,”

You talked some more about what to expect with Jay, after all a monster pregnancy would be nothing like a human one, and even then you’ve never been pregnant. You ate some breakfast and then went to look at yourself in the mirror. Pregnant, huh? You never really thought about being pregnant but you weren't opposed to it.

As the months passed pregnancy was… wild. From the cravings to the mood swings. Luckily all your monster lovers pampered you with more love and attention than you could ever ask for. And if you weren't getting showered with attention from your friends and family. If you were being honest you were putting off telling them. It wasn’t exactly the easiest thing to explain, that you were impregnated by several monsters and your best friend.

They understandably freaked out, but in the end, they took it well, if anything after a while you got tired of how much special treatment you got, you didn’t need to be escorted to the bathroom. At least that was the case until your third trimester.

Your stomach was starting to look like a torpedo, your back hurt like crazy, your feet were swollen and sore, it was so bad you had to be put on bed rest. So for the last month, you spent most of your time. In catching up on K-dramas and being fed fancy organic food

Birth however… was another story altogether you had to get a c-section, just the thought that they were going to have to cut you open made you uncomfortable, but it was the safer option as a human having a monstrous pregnancy. You almost died but hey you didn’t!

And SURPRISE! You had twins, a boy and a girl. For how big your stomach had gotten you had expected them to be bigger however, they were surprisingly small compared to what size you thought they would be. Compared to the average size for twins though they had some size on them. They grew surprisingly quickly, not much time had passed a few months and they already were toddler sized. Still babies but very big babies..

Your children look more and more like their fathers every day, tusks, scales, fur, shadow hands, vibrant colored eyes, horns and wild hair. They were a handful that’s for sure. Luckily for any trouble they might give you, their many fathers are there to help you

Now you’re bonded for life with your own special harem of monsters and the gateway has opened from their world. Now anyone can fuck and be fucked by the monster (or monsters) of their choice.

[mononijikayu]

chapter (3) — omg

GENRE: alternate universe - actors/celeb au!

WARNING/S: not safe for work (nsfw), r-18 and above, actors/singers au!, romance, fluff, minor angst, slow burn, humour, slice of life, will they won't they, light-hearted, flirting, playful, possessiveness, teasing, explicit content, possible, kissing, sexual content, innuendos, drama, feels, hurt/comfort, falling in love, love, happy ending, actor/singer! sukuna, actress/celeb! reader;

WORD COUNT: 3.3k words.

NOTE: i really think that if this were to happen irl, everyone would just really really lose their minds like??? genuinely. i really think that people would be entertained and also not. these are the in between of the kinktober event, which starts october 4th (6 pm pst, 9 am for ph time and 4 pm uk time) - the first one is also a sukuna one too!!! please enjoy them as they come out!!! thank you for your continued love!!! i love you all <3

TAGLIST: @kunasthiast, @midnight-138, @v3nd3ttal3on, @r0ckst4rjk, @theshxaverse, @cheescakebroom, @kariatenoh ;

masterlist

hey lover! series

IT WAS THAT SIX MONTH PERIOD THAT STUNNED THE WORLD. The internet was already on the verge of a meltdown the day it was announced that you and Sukuna were going to star opposite of each other in a new romantic drama film.

The plot? A searing, emotionally intense story about a husband and wife’s failing marriage. That alone was enough to send fans into a frenzy. The idea of you two, already known for your incredible chemistry, playing lovers on the brink of collapse was the stuff of internet gold.

Speculation ran wild for months. There were endless fan theories about how much tension would be in the movie, the inevitable blow-out arguments, and the long, charged stares across dimly lit rooms.

But the moment the real rumor started spreading—that the on-screen couple would have a full-blown romance scene—it was like gasoline was thrown on the fire.

Twitter threads were filled with fans practically holding their breath, trying to figure out if this was just clickbait or if the movie would actually go there. For weeks, fans analyzed trailers and snippets of scenes, slowing down moments to see if they could spot any clues.

There was talk of “the tension is unreal” or “there’s NO WAY they’ll pull off that scene without killing us all”. But despite the rampant speculation, nothing could have prepared them for what came next.

Then, the movie premiered. And that’s when everything exploded.

One fan was the first to drop the bombshell:

SukusukuOne Tweet: “WAIT. WHAT? A SEX SCENE BETWEEN THEM?!?!”

That single tweet ignited a wildfire across every social media platform. It took only minutes before reactions flooded in from every corner of the internet. It was as if the world collectively gasped and lost its ability to function.

Fans who had managed to watch the early screenings immediately went into panic mode, sending everyone else into spirals of anticipation.

Y/N’sWorldHQ: “I KNEW IT. I FREAKING KNEW IT BUT I WASN’T READY. NOT LIKE THIS.” 

SukuY/NHQ: “BESTIES, THIS IS NOT A DRILL. THIS IS SO FUCKING REAL!!!

Y/N-Rin: We asked for tension and got THIS. I CAN’T BREATHE.” 

SukunaSource: “Forget the plot—I need a minute to process what I just saw. That scene? UNREAL.” 

Y/N–SUKUONE “Y’all. It’s not just a scene. It’s THE scene. They went THERE and I’m not okay.”

For Y/N:  "I WAS NOT READY FOR THIS. SOMEONE HOLD ME." 

Suku–king: “SUKUNA. SEX SCENE. I REPEAT: SUKUNA. SEX SCENE. WITH Y/N?!? breathes into a paper bag" 

Y/N–Hiromi: "Oh, y’all are just gonna drop this bomb and leave us to SCREAM?" 

Pop Star Kuna: "No, because how am I supposed to sit through that scene like a normal person? I’ll be watching through my fingers." 

Y/N Movie Era: "WHO THOUGHT THIS WAS OKAY TO GIVE US THIS LEVEL OF ENERGY IN A MOVIE?!? MY WIG IS IN ANOTHER GALAXY.”

GIFs of you and Sukuna in slow, sultry close-ups began circulating within minutes. The intensity, the way the scene built from raw emotion to passionate release, left fans utterly destroyed.

People were making reaction videos, pausing the exact second the scene got too hot to handle and screaming at their screens. Thirst tweets, memes, and GIFs of fans collapsing on their couches like they’d just run a marathon became the norm.

HiroKuna: “I’M YELLING. THEY REALLY DID THAT. NO ONE TOLD ME I NEEDED OXYGEN.” 

KukuNa7: “I knew it would be good, but I didn’t think it would be THIS. I feel like I need a cigarette and I don’t even smoke.” 

Hiromimimi: “The way they LOOK at each other?! The rawness of it all?! This scene is pure FIRE.”

As if the internet wasn’t on fire enough, you and Sukuna decided to fuel the flames even further. You hopped on Twitter, casually posting a behind-the-scenes video of the two of you messing around in between takes.

In the shot, Sukuna was leaning back on the bed, one arm draped over his eyes, mid-laugh, while you sat there making faces at the as you got your retouching make up done. You tell him to stop, but you just both kept laughing and got scolded by the make up artist. Sukuna then calls you beautiful, and you blush.

Y/NTheOne: “When the ‘passionate scene’ turns into a blooper reel. 😂 No one tells you how hard it is to keep a straight face. #BTS #MovieMagic”

The reaction? Absolute chaos. Fans didn’t know whether to scream, cry, or laugh.

sukurin: “They’re just gonna post this like it’s no big deal??? WDYM SUKUNA CALLS HER BEAUTIFUL AND SHE JUST BLUSHES??? BRO???” 

y/n’s princess: “OKAY BUT I LOVE HOW CASUAL THEY ARE ABOUT THIS. HELP.” 

sukuy/n’s love child: “I’M NEVER GETTING OVER THIS. NEVER.”

kunatuna: “The fact that they’re laughing like this in between scenes, and we’re out here struggling to breathe??”

Not to be outdone, Sukuna joined in on the fun a few hours later by posting his own video on his Instagram story. The clip showed you two rehearsing the confrontation scene between the spouses and you were screaming at the top of your lungs before he made a face and you immediately break, falling into his arms and suddenly laughing as hard as humanly possible. Sukuna wrapped his arms around you too, hugging you back.

ItsRyoSuku: “Professional actors, by the way. 😂 #HappyTogether”

Cue more pandemonium:

JJK (Taylor’s Version): “NOT THEM POSTING BTS FOOTAGE LIKE THIS. STOPPPP.” 

kukuna1989: “I can’t breathe. How are they this funny and attractive at the same time???”

y/n on the ring: “This video is sending me. They’re out here clowning and we’re suffering.” 

y/nkunaaaaaahhhhhhhh: “I’m trying to focus on their acting, but instead I’m watching them roast themselves. THIS IS GOLD.”

kukukufukukukuku: WHAT DO YOU MEAN HAPPY TOGETHER??? RYOMEN SUKUNA????

Fan TikToks:

Y/N–Na–Na–Na: (in a shaky voice) “So, I just watched the scene… and honestly, I don’t think I’m okay. No spoilers, but if you think you can handle it—YOU CAN’T.” Cue someone throwing a pillow at the camera.

SukuPop: "There’s thirst traps, and then there’s THIS MOVIE. HOW DID WE GET HERE?"

And as if that wasn’t enough, a massive fan thread started trending on Twitter titled:

"Are They Dating or Just TOO Good at Acting?"

Enter you and Sukuna again, ready to add more and more fuel to the fire.

You once more jumped on the bandwagon with another cheeky Twitter post, sharing a behind-the-scenes photo of you both between takes. This was the alternative extension that was cut from the film — one which the director really liked. But it just didn’t make the final editing cut.

Still, the shot was perfect:  Ryomen Sukuna, half-dressed from the scene, lying on the bed resting his head against your shoulder, laughing about something you said. You? Half covered in the blankets. You were looking down at him, also laughing as you were in the middle of speaking, holding onto a pillow for dear life, your hair tousled from filming.

Y/NTheOne: “Sukuna tried to hold it for this shot. But I wished this made it too! 😂 #BTS #MovieMagic"

The internet? Instantly set ablaze. ONCE AGAIN.

HiromiRyomenCentral: "OKAY BUT YOU CAN’T JUST DROP THIS AND NOT GIVE US MORE!" 

KingofCursesStan: "They’re out here laughing, and I’m out here crying. MAKE IT MAKE SENSE."

Y/NStan: "Not them acting all cute and casual when we’re out here clutching our pearls. I CAN’T."

Then, of course, Ryomen Sukuna couldn’t lose here—of course, in classic Sukuna fashion. 

He posted a behind-the-scenes video on Instagram of you both rehearsing the scene. But instead of being sexy and intense, it was pure comedy. The two of you were dramatically exaggerating every move, making ridiculous faces at each other. 

You were both exhausted, but you both wanted to wake each other up. So, it came to this — both of you losing your minds to make everything as funny as possible. At one point, Sukuna dramatically threw himself back on the bed, rolling his eyes in a mock-swoon while you burst into giggles so uncontrollable that you doubled over.

ItsRyoSuku: “Multiverse of Madness 😂 #ItsAComedyActually"

Fans were once more  losing their minds in the comments:

RyoHQ: “NOT SUKUNA TURNING THIS INTO A COMEDY SKETCH?! I CAN’T BREATHE.” 

SukuRy: "I’m gonna need 48 hours to recover from the whiplash between the actual scene and THIS." 

SukuStar: "Please tell me the DVD has a blooper reel. I BEG YOU." 

StarStarKuna: "Y’all are just CLOWNING at this point, meanwhile I’m struggling to form a coherent thought after seeing that scene.”

The memes were iconic. Some were based on popular crying reaction GIFs, while others used dramatic slow-motion moments to parody the sheer intensity of the scene. One particularly viral meme had Sukuna’s character looking down at you in the scene with the caption: “When your favorite ship finally goes canon and it’s STEAMY AF.”

Soon, clips from the movie were being re-edited with dramatic soundtracks, making the moment between your characters feel even more cinematic, even more romantic. Someone even edited the entire scene to Celine Dion’s “It’s All Coming Back to Me Now”, and the internet practically screamed.

You and Sukuna couldn’t help but keep the fun going. A few hours later, you responded to one of the fan edits with a quote-tweet, saying:

Y/NTheOne: “Honestly, this edit is better than the actual movie. 😆”

Sukuna, naturally, followed up with a comment that sent everyone into a tailspin:

ItsRyoSuku: “Still waiting on our Grammy for ‘Best Chemistry On-Screen.’ 😏”

The internet was absolutely living for it. Fans were quick to point out every tiny behind-the-scenes moment, analyzing the body language, the laughter, and of course, the constant playful teasing between you two. Some fans even swore up and down that they knew you two had undeniable off-screen chemistry, and this was just proof.

MimiHiro67 Posted: "Look at the way he looks at her like that. I’m telling you, IT’S NOT JUST ACTING." 

Kuku/Y/N Replied: "The flirting during the bloopers?? HELLO?! WE’RE SEEING IT." 

HiroKunaFT Replied: "They’re out here, trolling us, but I KNOW they’re secretly dating. THEY HAVE TO BE."

Before you knew it, fan art, memes, and theories flooded every corner of the internet. There were edits of you and Sukuna as modern-day star-crossed lovers, wedding fanfics, and even whole video compilations of you two joking and messing around during interviews.

But perhaps the most hilarious reaction came from one particular fan who summed it up perfectly in a single tweet:

Y/NKunaSource: “Let’s be real. We’re all just happy to live in a world where they exist and can mess with us like this. Bless.”

By the end of the week, the internet was a beautiful mix of chaos, laughter, and way too many thirst traps inspired by that one scene. You and Sukuna continued to play along with the fans, leaning into the fun and teasing just enough to keep everyone guessing—and loving every second of it.

The chaos continued to escalate in the following days, with the internet running wild over every new detail, theory, and behind-the-scenes snippet about the two of you and your relationship. Fans were relentless, and you and Sukuna? You weren’t about to let things calm down just yet. If anything, you leaned into the frenzy, becoming the ultimate internet trolls.

It started innocently enough. You posted a cute boomerang of the two of you at a cast dinner, clinking glasses and flashing cheeky grins at the camera. You looked stunning resting against Sukuna’s chair. Harmless, right? Not according to the fanbase.

Y/NTheOne: “Cheers to being the internet’s favorite scandal 😜🍸#StillNotDating #OrAreWe?”

That was enough to send your followers spiraling into madness again. Fans combed through the boomerang as if it held secret, hidden messages. Someone even analyzed Sukuna’s scarlet eye contact in slow motion, trying to decipher what it all meant.

Sukuna’sHuh!?: “THE CHEMISTRY. I CAN’T. They’re definitely dating.” 

YoHiroKuna: “Every time they say they’re ‘not dating,’ I lose five years off my life from the lies. 😂” 

Kukukukuna: “Why are they like this?! Just admit it already!”

Veteran Actor Ryomen Sukuna, never one to miss out on the fun, upped the ante. He soon after posted a selfie of the two of you on set, both of you in full costume, right before filming a scene. The twist? You were sitting in his lap, giggling as he gave the camera a devilish smirk. The caption?

ItsRyoSuku: “Just another day at work with my favorite co-star, my baby doll  👀 #WeLiveForMethodActing #OrDoWe"

The comment section exploded:

SukuDw: "EXCUSE ME, SIR??? SITTING IN HIS LAP?!?" 

Y/N’sbabygirl: “Method acting? Is that what we’re calling this now?? LMAO” 

RyoRyoYoBoat: "My mind can’t handle this level of chaos. 😳"

Then came the real kicker. In the start of the promo junket, there was an interview shot to promote the movie. And the host, unable to resist, asked you both about that scene again. The moment the question was out there, Sukuna leaned back in his chair, arms crossed, eyes sparkling with mischief.

The host clears his throat. “So, everyone’s talking about that… intimate scene between you two. How did you prepare for it?”

Without missing a beat, Sukuna deadpanned, “Oh, we didn’t prepare at all. We just winged it. All natural chemistry. It’s just like that between me and my doll, right here.” He shot you a wink, making you snort with laughter.

You, trying to play it cool but clearly failing, added, “Honestly, I think the hardest part was not laughing through the whole thing. I mean, darling, we’re professionals, but…”

Sukuna cut in, “But when you’re this close with someone…” He leaned toward you, smirking, “… things just come naturally.”

The internet immediately combusted. Clips of the interview spread like wildfire, with fans collectively losing their minds. The phrase “all natural chemistry” trended on Twitter for hours.

JJK4HiroKuna: “’Natural chemistry’ MY HEART IS DONE.” 

HiroKunaHiroKuna: "He WINKED?! IS HE TRYING TO KILL US?!" 

OneY/NKunaNation: “We all just agreed they’re married at this point, right?”

Y/N–Y/NHQ: I bet the bed chem is also natural, huh?

Memes flooded every platform. One fan made a video edit of you and Sukuna’s most flirtatious moments, set to some dramatic, romantic soundtrack. The edit quickly went viral, with even more fans joining the speculation train. Soon, someone added to the thread a GIF of Sukuna winking from another project, captioning it with, “When he knows EXACTLY what he’s doing.”

The internet was already hanging by a thread after months of anticipation, memes, and wild speculation, but that night—that night—Sukuna and you delivered the ultimate bombshell that no one saw coming.

It was the end of the movie's promotional tour, and just when fans thought they had seen everything there was to see, Sukuna decided to drop a casual little Instagram story that sent the entire fanbase spiraling.

The video was simple enough at first: the two of you chilling in his trailer during a break, scrolling through Twitter and Instagram, laughing at the flood of comments, reaction videos, and memes about your on-screen chemistry.

But it was the soundtrack that immediately caught everyone's attention—George Michael’s “Careless Whisper” playing softly in the background. That instantly iconic sax riff was the setup for what was about to be an unforgettable moment. Fans knew something chaotic was coming; it was only a matter of what.

Sukuna, ever the mastermind, flipped the camera towards himself, giving a mock-serious look before turning it to you, sitting next to him on the couch, grinning like you were in on the joke.

Sukuna looks at you, smirking. “So, the rumors are true.”

That one line was enough to make everyone sit up, hearts pounding, fingers hovering over their keyboards, ready to fire off tweets. You, already sensing where this was headed, played along like the pro you were.

You raised your brow, matching his smirk. “What rumors?”

Sukuna turned his head slowly, looking directly into the camera with that signature smirk that drove fans wild. His voice dropped to a low, sultry tone, dripping with fake seriousness.

He snickers back. “The ones about us, doll.” He paused, letting the tension build, eyes twinkling with mischief. And then, with perfect comedic timing, he delivered the finishing blow. “We do love keeping people on their toes.”

That was it. That’s all it took. The fanbase erupted into chaos as the video zoomed in dramatically on both of your faces, just before you two completely lost it, bursting into uncontrollable laughter. The screen faded to black, but the internet was already ablaze.

The hashtags #TheRumorsAreTrue, #SukunaAndHisDoll, and #KeepingUsOnOurToes were trending worldwide within minutes. Memes were being generated at lightning speed, GIFs of the dramatic zoom popping up on every corner of the web. And the fan comments? Absolute gold.

HiromiSource: “WHY ARE THEY LIKE THIS?!? I CAN’T KEEP UP.” 

KingofCursesHQ: “They’re literally trolling us and I LOVE IT.” 

HiroKuna4Lyfe: “The fact that Sukuna just casually said ‘the rumors are true’ and then did THAT?? I’M GONE.”

Reaction videos flooded TikTok, fans filming themselves losing their minds as they watched Sukuna drop the ultimate tease. One user even posted a slow-motion edit of the zoom with captions like “My heart cannot handle this level of trolling, this is bad for me” and “They’re playing with us like it’s a sport, and I’m here for it.”

But just when you thought the chaos had peaked, Sukuna decided to throw another wrench into the mix. About five minutes after the video went live, he took to Twitter to reply to the overwhelming reactions.

@ItsRyoKuna: “Oh? Did I? Hm…..I wonder if I did?”

That tweet sent fans into a frenzy all over again. The cryptic nature, the smirk behind the words—it was peak Sukuna, and they were living for it.

HiroKuKu: “HE KNOWS WHAT HE’S DOING. STOP THIS MAN. NO DON’T.” 

Pop Sensation Kuna: “’Did I?’ SIR I’M NOT OKAY WITH THIS LEVEL OF TEASING.” 

YoItsKukuNa: “Sukuna’s out here stirring the pot like a pro, and I can’t even be mad.”

Of course, you couldn’t resist getting in on the fun either. A few minutes after Sukuna’s tweet, you replied:

@Y/NTheOne: “Guess we’ll never know 😏”

And that? That was the nail in the coffin. Fans went into full meltdown mode. Screenshots of your reply were immediately plastered across every fan page, each theory more dramatic than the last.

HiroY/NHQ: “NOT YOU TOO. ARE WE EVER GONNA GET A STRAIGHT ANSWER???” 

SusuKuY/N: “This is literally a soap opera and I’m addicted. GIVE ME MORE.”

It’sY/N’sWorld: Y/N ITS TIME TO STOP IM GOING CRAZY

@Y/NTheOne Replied: No <3

Before long, the internet was awash in fan art, with some recreating the trailer scene in elaborate comic-book style panels, and others painting romanticized versions of your characters together, always with that cheeky, ambiguous vibe that kept everyone on edge.

The fans were even dissecting the choice of “Careless Whisper” in the background. Some insisted it was a secret code, a hint that there was something more going on between you two than just professional chemistry. Others joked that it was Sukuna’s favorite way to troll, playing the ultimate cheesy song during the ultimate tease.

HelloDoll: “Careless Whisper? REALLY?? That’s the most dramatic song choice and I’m here for it.” 

JJKuna: “They’re basically telling us they’re the chaotic couple of the century and I can’t handle it.”

The memes kept coming. Someone edited a video of Sukuna saying, “The rumors are true.” then cut to fans fainting and screaming in reaction clips. Another fan took a screenshot of your zoom-in moment and slapped “I WILL NEVER RECOVER” in bold letters across it.

As the fanbase continued to spiral, Sukuna and you just watched from the sidelines, laughing at the chaos you’d unleashed. It was a perfect storm—your playful trolling, the cheeky teasing, and the undeniable chemistry that everyone loved to speculate about.

By the end of the night, the internet was convinced they’d been played in the best way possible. The mystery surrounding your relationship status was still intact, but you’d managed to make the entire ordeal one of the most memorable and entertaining situations in pop culture for your fans.

And for the fans? They wouldn’t have had it any other way.

[absolutebl]

Best & Worst BLs of 2023

My Top 15 BLs of 2023 are (in order)

1 Our Dating Sim

Korea Viki

Nerds in love, deadlines, gaming, teasing, pining tiny idiots, casual affection, linguistic oops, ADORABLE. If you haven't watched this, it's a must. A perfect short form KBL, an office set reunion romance featuring geeks that really suits 8 eps with no fluff and no chaff. Just comforting and yummy.

I adored every aspect from the casting to the pristinely simple premise to the quietly smooth execution. Sure it’s low stakes, but that makes it high domesticity and extremely warm and gentle. This is a fuzzy blanket of a story - a cozy BL. It lives in my rewatch pile and you know what’s best about it? Every single episode is in that pile. There’s no skipping with this one, it might be good natured and calmly sweet but it’s tight and the pacing is excellent.

Also recieves my 2023 award for best giggle.

2 I Cannot Reach You

AKA I Can't Reach You AKA Kimi ni wa Todokanai

Japan Netflix

This classic friends-to-lovers BL is everything Japan does best. Angsty. Emo. Aching. Driven by real thirst. Yamato is deeply in love with his childhood bestie, Kakeru, and has been for ages, unable to hide his ungainly damaging high school need. He wants Kakeru in every way possible and it oozes off of the screen.

Kakeru is silly and a little simple, but not frenetic or overly camp about it. He is earnest, and genuinely wants to keep Yamato in his life which means giving a romance (and gayness) a fair chance. We watch him realize his affection and what form it can take in a truly authentic way.

This show was impossibly kind to both of its lead characters and I felt almost honored that I got to watch something so lovely and rare play out on my screen.

Also wins the best thirst award.

These were the 2 BLs that got 10/10 from me in 2023. The rest of these got 9/10 from me.

3 My School President

Thailand YouTube

GMMTV gave us a classic high school set Thai BL with tropes like messy boys singing their feelings that made this one Love Sick for the modern age with all the gentle sweetness and pining ache, but none of the dated damaging tropes or issues. Who let my BL be this wholesome and funny? My favourite GMMTV BL offering to date. And yes, I've watched them ALL.

Received the Namgoong award for best wingman 2023.

4 I Feel You Linger in the Air

Thailand grey

IFYLITA is an exquisite BL, from filming techniques to narrative framework. Steeped in history and family drama this is an elegant and classy BL. The main couple (both as a pair and individuals) were excellent, particularly Bright (Yai) whose eye-work acting style is a personal favorite of mine. It's a marker of how great it was that it's so high on my list despite the ending which was very much not what I wanted.

Additional accolade, sexiest moment of 2023 - (the oil scene).

You could try to fight me, but you'll have no grip.

5 Kiseki: Dear to Me

Taiwan Gaga & Viki

The plot is totally ridiculous and slightly unhinged. There’s a gum-ball machine of cameos, elder gay rep, great chemistry from all pairs (everyone is queer), and a KILLER side couple. It involves all the tropes under a very offhand framework of gay mafia gangs + food = love. As a result Kiseki is a poster child for Taiwanese BL, and I happen to love Taiwanese BL. Bonus? They also managed to END IT WELL, which we cannot expect from Taiwan.

Best side couple 2023!

(thank goodness Taiwan made this list!)

6 Jun and Jun

Korea Viki

A delightful office romance about an ex-idol who joins cubical life only to find his new boss is his first love. With a snappy (sometimes even raunchy) script, enjoyable sides, a pretty as peaches cast, and descent chemistry this show made up for in style what it lacked in substance. I like fluff. I loved this. I smiled every moment I was watching.

Best flirting 2023.

AKA "the tongue knows" award

7 The Eighth Sense

Korea Viki

This one is a bit chewy and sticky and less perfect than most KBLs. It’s got a bit of an age gap, country boy/city boy, stellar acting, complex characters, and leads with great chemistry and tension. This isn’t in the KBL bubble, there’s sharp edges and lots of triggers. For a BL the darkness of the content left me feeling unsettled (which is the only reason it didn't get a perfect score) but it has a glorious ending and that counts for a lot.

2023's most likely to appeal to non-BL watchers.

8 Unintentional Love Story

Korea iQIYI

The lead, Gongchan (maknae of B1A4) is a fucking GIFT, who carried this show. He was luminous with extraordinarily expressive eyes, which he used to carry a killer plot and challenging role. Forced into a totally understandable betrayal, falling in love despite himself, put into a corner he can't get out of, the AGONY, the eyes EMOTING at us in PAIN. Driven by external conflict, social tension and pressure this story seems simple but it's actually refined and quite complex. I loved this show.

Best story structure 2023.

9 My Personal Weatherman

AKA Taikan Yoho

Japan Gaga

This is classic yaoi of the kind that really only works from Japan. Basically: boys who fell in love in college end up living together but both are so repressed they actually don't realize they're in love. It's high heat is well done, but it leaned into the "why don't they just talk for fuck's sake?" which is exacerbated by the fact that they're already fucking. Sure is sexy tho.

Best use of props 2023 for the shower of sheets.

10 Our Dining Table

AKA Bokura no Shokutaku

Japan Gaga

Lonely salaryman and talented cook gets accidentally adopted by a college kid and his little brother. It’s a quiet & cozy little parable of found family alleviating loneliness. It's lovely & sweet with the romance beats used to build a family relationship, not just couple intimacy. Special.

First prize for domesticity.

11 Laws of Attraction

Thailand iQIYI

This is a great gay suspense thriller with several solid couples, fun plot, killer characters, queer rep, and a happy ending. It’s tons of fun and I had an absolute blast watching it.

Charn wins my favorite character of 2023.

12 La Pluie

Thailand Viki

This BL takes to task the fated mates trope and what it means to have love chained intimately to predestination. It’s about how faith in destiny before choice diminishes the authenticity of emotion, relationships, and connection. This is a high concept to examine through the lens of a BL. With good chemistry and decent acting all around, plus some excellent high heat and representation of consent and a few other rare tropes, this one has to (like it’s sibling show My Ride) earn high marks.

Most interesting concept 2023.

13 The New Employee

Korea Viki

So good, SO QUEER, so soft, a near pitch perfect office BL with conflict derived from that setting. Also found family and a lesbian bestie. This is what I wanted from this new crop of office set KBLs ALL ALONG. Rainbow rice cakes forever!

Best overall queer rep from Korea.

14 Step By Step

Thailand Gaga & YouTube & Viki

This was Thailand’s answer to The New Employee, and everything I loved about that show I loved about this one. This was an office romance between stern boss and sweet subordinate that felt more authentic to an office environment than previous Thai BLs of this ilk which added tension to the narrative and character development.

Chot wins best queer character 2023.

15 Love Tractor

Korea iQIYI

Most of this country-set BL had me feral for the beautiful broken city boy and his hot young farmer. Hyung romance, puppy/cat pairing, open frankness meets jaded reserve, language play, water hose frolicking, only one bed = all my favorite silly tropes.

Biggest "he so pretty" gasp of the year award.

10 Worst BLs of 2023 (that I watched)

My Blessing

My Universe: Casanova Begins

Boyband the series

Cafe In Love

Chains of Heart

Hit Bite Love

Only Friends

Senior Love Me

The Luminous Solution

The Promise

Yes, you read that right. I know I'm against the flow but I really did not like Only Friends. Everyone's taste is different.

However I DNFed faster and more BL's this year than ever before, so that means my 10 worst probably aren't quite reflective...

10 Probably Actually Worst BLs (I dropped 'em)

My Story

The Day I Loved You

Beyond the Star

Crazy Handsome Rich

Dinosaur Love

House of Stars

Mr Cinderella 2

Love Bill

Stormy Honeymoon

The Star Always Follow You

Codicils in General

I only carefully track/watch Thailand, Taiwan, Korea, and Japan. Other countries are not fully represented.

My Numbers

So my spreadsheet chronicled 138 BLs that finish airing in 2023.

101 = watched & reviewed

2 = still in the docket (WDYEY2 & Love Syndrome III)

15 = CNF (could not find)

20 = DNF (which also accounts for how few very low scores I handed out in 2023 as opposed to previous years, I just stopped watching). Speaking of which...

Ratings spread

(# of stars. #of BLs given that rating)

0 (see the DNFs instead)

2 - IT'S DEPRESSING they killed the gay, save yourself

7 - I DON'T KNOW WHAT I AM WATCHING AND NEITHER DOES IT

7 - FATALLY FLAWED but still basically BL, however… do we want to support this kind of behavior?

9 - WATCH IF YOU HAVE NOTHING BETTER TO DO but don’t expect much, it’s a total hot mess

17 - WORTH WATCHING BUT FLAWED probably around the ending or in narrative structure/cohesion or censorship

14 - RECOMMENDED WITH RESERVATIONS i.e. isn’t quite BL, convoluted, not strictly HEA, too short/long, or chemistry issues

30 - RECOMMENDED some concerns around tropes (like dub con) or story structure but still satisfies as BL

13 - ABSOLUTELY RECOMMENDED probably a few pacing issues or one flaw

2 - HIGHLY RECOMMENDED faithful to tropes, happy ending, good chemistry, few flaws, high rewatch potential

(source)

[dabiloveln]

☆‧₊˚🎤✩ ₊˚🎸⊹♡✮˚｡𖦹 °✩ | part THREE❕finally ❕

being Fuyumi’s bestie and Touya’s girlfriend headcanons !! [ everyone is ooc ]

[ you are Fuyumi’s co-worker teacher and Touya is a rockstar ]

[ weeks later ] “sooo… will you be my girlfriend?” Touya asked you while he nervously walked from side to side in his room and waited for your answer through his phone. “Yeah… i mean… why not !!”

you agreed to help him with his upcoming solo project and to be a part of his music video as a “girlfriend” for his character, like you know, with the most basic storyline

[ the day the music video was released] You were sitting next to Touya looking at the screen and reading the comments and GOD it was so embarrassing you turned red, Fuyumi sat behind and was laughing at both of you

[ some comments under the music video ] they’re like a real couple :0 / OMG ? WHO IS SHE ? TOUYA GIVE US HER NAME / uhmm… i know they’re just pretending to be a couple but the way he looks at her…. i’m jealous / THE KISS SCENE DUDEEEEE / oh imagine if they’re dating oops / and more…

“Damnn… who knew we would look so good as a couple huh?” Touya said rewatching the mv once again, “and stop blushing, i’m just teasing, or not” he winked at you.

[ 01:17 ] You were walking home accompanied by him, discussing every topic possible, his further music plans, your work, his family, then laughing at cringe moments you remembered from filming the music video

he walked beside you and you glanced at him and GOD he was so gorgeous. under the moonlight his turquoise eyes looked even prettier than usual, his white hair and shiny piercings, literally everything about him was mesmerizing

as you reached your home you both stood awkwardly, not wanting to separate from each other and asking each other dumb questions just to talk more 😭

“uhmm… y/n, aren’t you having a day off tomorrow? maybe we can walk a bit more? if you’re okay with that, of course” minutes later you both reached the nearest beach

you both slowly walked by the shore admiring the beautiful view you had there “we should have filmed the kiss scene here” he was teasing you again but damn, you wished he wasn’t

once you were tired Touya sat on the sand, putting his jacket next to him for you to sit on it. you didn’t know what made you feel so nervous. maybe you were just cold? or maybe the feeling of something bad coming?

“y/n… i got to tell you something, but promise me you won’t beat the shit out of me okay? i mean you can, but please do not, hah” he was looking away from you, his voice sounded shaky, you never saw him so nervous before. “sure”

he made himself comfortable turning to you: “you know… i’m not really serious when it comes to flirting or teasing, i’m actually very bad at these things, call me a loser if you want. i’m so used of being alone and distant from people, not counting my family though, but it’s not about them. i never had close friends, or lovers or anything like that, i just… didn’t care about it. maybe i just wanted to think so, but then there’s you in my house, being so sweet and kind to a guy who barely speaks to you, showing me your interest in my music and becoming someone who’s willing to help me… even if it’s just dying my hair hah, you feel so comfortable to be around with. Every time we spend time together i find myself craving for more and more… like what the heck? i never was serious but i am right now. i actually suck at this game, i’m so unromantic and stupid, but… y/n. i like you, i REALLY do. it feels like you’re the only one i’m not scared to be open with. and i want you to feel the same about me… i know i can’t force you but i just-” he couldn’t finish his speech as you shut him up with a kiss.

you both confessed your feelings that night. “so, will you be my girlfriend? oh shit, wait, no… will you let me be your man?” Touya held your hands.

he even told you he enjoyed reading the comments about how good you two look together ;)

he proudly called you a rockstar girlfriend when you started dating (his dream came true) even in front of his family

they already know you as Fuyumi’s colleague and friend, but they just like you even more now 🥺 mama Rei treats you as her second daughter and always asks you to stay overnight, Enji is like… as always (but deep down this man felt actually glad his son is happy with the right person)

you were added to the family chat !!

Touya decided it would be better if you both kept your relationship as a secret, at least your identity. your safety was his responsibility and he doesn’t want jealous fans bother you

THIS MAN SPOILS YOU SO MUCH 🤚🏻 you want to see your favorite band? he will get you the best VIP tickets. you mentioned that one black dress that caught your attention? check your wardrobe the next day. you never needed anything for him, but he was taught to take care of the loved ones (mama Rei and Fuyumi give him the best advices)

COUPLE PIERCINGS with the matching accessories is a must.

of course you’ve got the endless free pass ticket for his concerts, and of course he sings the songs which were written inspired by the relationship while searching for you in the crowd

bonus:

[months later]

Touya is lying on your chest holding you tightly while you’re caressing his head and playing with his now dyed black strands of hair. You’ve moved into your own apartment recently and nights like this one are usual. Both tired of work just spending quiet hours together.

Touya speaks softly, “you know, lately i’ve been thinking about what would be if we never spoke. i’d probably still be in my room rotting lonely..,” he looks up at you, “but i’m glad i don’t have to worry about it when i can feel your touch in moments like now”

little did you know he already knows your finger size and he’s planning to spend the rest of his life with his little rockstar.

guys i’m so sorry for taking so long with part three, but i hope you like it even a little bit 🤍 thank you for reading !! i’m not a writer at all but i really wanted to make this a thing and bring some delusions hah (if there are mistakes please forgive me)

part one part two

taglist: @sikuthealien @briethekitsune @cici-sunshine @moonchild701 @greenmanshoe @miikalias @ravenredwine

[lurkingshan]

Japanese QL Corner

We've got a jam packed post this week, folks. The live airing shows continue to impress, a sequel film and a recent GL dropped, and one of my favorites of the year cam to an end. These are all streaming on Gaga or provided via fansub (feel free to ask if you don’t know where to find them).

Our Youth

This week the show gave me everything I wanted from a POV switch, as we finally went back a little to get a peek into Hirukawa's head and learn how his feelings for Minase developed. From there, we continued with the high school era story, with Hirukawa and Minase going together to see his dad's new film, which turned out to be a BL. The show really nailed how meaningful that moment was to both of them, to see characters like themselves depicted on screen and realize what it meant (@twig-tea). This episode also gave us more of a sense of what's broken in each of their relationships with their parents, and they are now heading off to spend the weekend with Hirukawa's mother. I'm nervous to see how this past iteration of their relationship ended, but also excited to get back to the present.

Love is Like a Poison

An excellent ending to all around solid as a rock show. This drama managed to blend several genres and develop a great romance and tell so many good jokes and somehow never take a single misstep in its storytelling. So refreshing! Shiba and Haruto are a battle couple for the ages and I wish them well on their future domestic and legal partnership. Can't recommend this one highly enough!

Love in the Air Koi

Color me charmed. I really like Fuma and Kai as a pair, more than I expected to. Fuma comes across more good-humored and unserious than he does sleazy, and it's clear that he is actually very serious about Kai. “Why do your eyes always look like you’re asking for help?” was a great line to demonstrate that Fuma sees through Kai's bluster, but at the same time he knows when to back off and give Kai space to process. Kai got me with his constant smiling whenever he thought Fuma couldn't see (the shot in the side mirror of the car being my favorite). I also loved the quick scene we got with Arashi and Rei discussing their friends and the casual affection between them now that they're a couple. This show is great, and so far I think they've done a good job with the darker aspects of Kai's story. I really appreciated @bengiyo's reflections this week on what it's doing well and how the show is subverting expectations with the casting.

The Fragrance You Inherit

This week we got more context for Sakura's college days, including meeting her bestie Ryosuke (an ace king!). I definitely suspect that Sakura's affections were not entirely one-sided back then, but Mone remains a mystery for now. This story is definitely about closure rather than any new romance, and maybe in the end allowing Sakura to be who she is more freely. Speaking of which, Toki might just be my favorite teenage son character ever. He's such a good boy, and he seems driven primarily by a desire to know his mother and support her in pursuing her own happiness instead of just his. I look forward to meeting Mone's husband next episode and continuing to watch all these lovely people treat each other with compassion and kindness. You can find the show here, with big thanks to @isaksbestpillow for providing English subs.

Let's Eat Together Aki and Haru: More Please

This week Gaga dropped a sequel to this charming if inessential little food BL film. The first one let us down by not making the relationship explicitly romantic, and the sequel did rectify that as the characters prepared to leave school and contemplated life no longer living together. Though still no kiss for us. It didn't blow me away, but it's a nice little bit of fluff if you have free time and want something light.

Salty Blue

This short GL film (only 15 minutes) tells a solid and sweet little friends to lovers story, with some surprises thrown in for fun. I recommend giving it a watch! You can find it here with big thanks to @nicks-den for subbing and sharing it.

[mochidoie]

CO-

kim doyoung x reader wc - 8.7k genre - very slow burn, frenemy to lovers (light banter), coworkers!au, roomates!au warnings - a small kiss scene

You and Doyoung coexist in two specific ways: cohabitation and as coworkers. However, your friendship, if you can call it that, is far from besties and more on being cordial with one another. Nonetheless, in this dreary corporate world, he is the only one who just gets you and despite his coldness, he feels the same about you.

Doyoung annoyingly types on his keyboard in the cubicle next to you, completely disrupting your concentration and general workflow. Groaning, you hope that it was enough to signify how irritated you were. However, instead of the obnoxious typing coming to a halt, it intensifies tenfold and catches the attention of everyone else who sits on this floor.

Embarrassment washes over your body as you forcibly stand up and peer over the short wall that divides both of your desks. “Knock it off.” You gently smack the back of Doyoung’s head and he winces forward, looking up at you immediately with a glare.

“I’m seriously going to report you to HR one day.” He whispers, his threat just barely sounds legitimate. Doyoung is the greatest at bluffing and empty threats. 

“Well today won’t be the day. You’re typing so loud that it could be a noise complaint.” Rolling your eyes, you drop back down into your seat. Smoothly swiveling your chair back to the intimidating project blown full screen on your monitor, you dread every minute of being here. Your day is full of reports, documentations, and boring project meetings. 

You’ll have small talk about the weather in the break room over some watered down coffee made by a machine and happy hours on random days of the week at the nearby upscale restaurant.

You’ll run into someone from another department on the elevators and feel awkward for several floors until one of you finally gets out. Hiding in the bathroom is the only escape from the depressing gray carpet and fluorescent indoor lighting. 

“You could make this a more enjoyable workplace if you didn’t sigh every three minutes.” Doyoung walks around to your cubicle, crossing his arms like the prick he always is.

“I’m sighing because you keep typing for all of the world to hear you.” You turn in your chair, facing him once again with your lips in a line. “Get out of my space.”

“I’m not in your space.” You watch as he slyly backs up from the wall, the tips of his shoes barely skimming the invisible line that crosses into your cubicle. “What is the bad mood for today?” Doyoung raises an eyebrow.

You despise when someone points out your attitude, it just feels completely unnecessary to bring up in conversation. However, you are normally less mean to him and Doyoung was a sensitive individual. “Rough start this morning, my bread got jammed in the toaster and flat tire on my way to work.”

“This is why I tell you to use the oven and to carpool with me. The carbon footprint we could minimize by just using one car is astronomical.” He shoves his hands into his pressed pants pockets, “I guess this is why I didn’t see your car in the lot this morning.”

“It’s in the shop. I’m out of a car for about two weeks because they found something wrong with the engine or something.” 

“Just your luck.”

You groan, “are you just going to nag and pity me, or are you going to offer me a ride home?” 

Doyoung puts his hands up in the air, as he often speaks with his hands. “You’re always welcome to ride with me. You just normally refuse.” 

“Yeah, because it looks weird if we got into the same car together.” 

He shrugs, “people already know we live together. What’s the big deal about it?”

“It’ll look like we’re … you know… Together.” You keep your voice down to a whisper, afraid for any nosy ears listening into business they aren’t a part of. Doyoung nearly throws himself forward laughing at your shifty eyes and your sheepish statement.

“Seriously? I think people can tell we’re far from ever being together.” Ouch. Not that you had any romantic interest in this vile man, but it was a bigger blow to your ego if anything.

It’s also the way Doyoung says it. It’s pure mockery, a joke that you even though there was a slim chance at the consideration of you two being together. 

You shrug him off, ignoring how snobby he is being. “People make rumors. Someone who isn’t close to us can see me getting into your car and get the wrong idea.” Turning around, Doyoung takes the signal that he probably pissed you off more than he intended to.

He sighs and walks up behind your chair. Placing two hands on your shoulders, you slightly flinch at the sudden physical contact. Doyoung leans down to whisper gently into your ear, “let them think what they want.” It sends a shiver down your spine and you don’t have a snarky comment to say back to him.

The sound of his shuffling disappears as he returns back to his side and resumes his typing. You aren’t excited to tackle the task in front of you, if anything, you wish Doyoung annoyed you for a bit longer.

The suffocating dullness of the office wrings any ounce of creativity out of you. You’re like a wet towel that was left too long out in the sun and now you’re all dry and crunchy. 

A swoosh notification catches your eye, a new email from your manager in your inbox for you to worry about. Letting out another sigh of the day, you’re wondering what minuscule thing she needs now. The subject line already has you rolling your eyes and did you really want to open it? Not really. 

FROM PATRICIA A.

HALLOWEEN CELEBRATION: HH AT 127 BAR AND RESTAURANT

Hello Team,

I hope you’re all having a productive day so far. Our VPs have organized a company happy hour for all to attend. Please refer to the infographic attached to this email for information in regards to the Halloween happy hour event that is being held next week at the 127 Bar and Restaurant. 

RSVP through here by the EOD on Friday. Your attendance is highly encouraged as this will be a chance for everyone to network and chat with our VPs. Appropriate Halloween costumes are mandatory for attendance to be considered. Hope to see you all there. 

Best, Patricia A. Regional Manager 

“Costumes, are you fucking kidding me?” You hear Doyoung over your wall, followed by a ferocious clicking noise. 

“Don’t worry, Kim. You won’t need one, you’re already scary looking as is.” Jumping up, you place your elbows on the counter of his wall and peer over him. Doyoung rolls his eyes and stands to level the eye contact.

“You might want to get one, don’t want our VPs to get too scared seeing your face.” His eyebrow raises as he watches your face contour in disgust. He scoffs, closing his laptop and putting his monitor on sleep mode. He makes his way out to the hallway.

“Where are you going?” Your nosiness gets the best of you, not that you actually cared much about Doyoung’s whereabouts.

“On my way to ask our pretty receptionist what costume she’s going in.” He smirks, making a direct line toward the elevators. Slumping back into your chair, you hover your cursor over the RSVP link. Another damn happy hour. 

Doyoung whistles his way out of the elevator as it dings on the lobby level of the office. Around the corner, he is met with the office receptionist with her hair neatly framing her face and red lips curving into a smile as she greets him. 

“Good afternoon Daisy, how are you today?” He rummages through the candy bowl full of mints and dental gum, despite never really caring for sweet cavity inducing treats.

Daisy leans forward on her desk with her sweet smile never leaving her pretty face. “I’m good, how are you?” She knows Doyoung as the man that would often stop by at random hours of the day for small talk and a mint. Not entirely knowing that he was mostly there to see her, she indulges in the light conversation with the nice man. 

“Happy that it’s Thursday, as usual.” Doyoung tears the mint wrapper with his teeth. His forearm is placed comfortably on the counter of the desk as he leans forward chatting with Daisy. 

“Friday is so close.” Daisy says excitedly, clapping her hands together in a cheery youthful manner. “Any weekend plans?”

“Probably going to see the new movie in theaters with a friend.” Truthfully, Doyoung never really has weekend plans set. He spends his weekends indoors and locked behind his door. A true mystery as to what he does behind it. “Not sure though, I’ll see how I’m feeling in the morning.”

“Yeah, I get that. I try to get out of my house during the weekend so that I’m still productive, even though all I want is to relax in bed.” She chuckles and instantly, Doyoung smiles at her relatability and honesty. Her energy is contagious, he always feels a burst whenever he speaks to her. 

“Hey, I mean to ask, do you have a costume in mind for the happy hour next week?” Doyoung suckles the spicy peppermint, rocking it back and forth between each cheek. Daisy ponders for a second and he finds an opportunity to make a very bad joke. “Anything to do with flowers perhaps? Because you’re Daisy.” He laughs at his own joke and she lightly gives in to such a corny question.

“That would be funny,” she laughs, “but I’m not sure if I can attend. I let Patricia know that I’ll be attending my boyfriend’s sister’s engagement party that night.” What a glass shattering moment as Doyoung was not aware that Daisy had a boyfriend. Then again, a woman like her wouldn’t be stuck being single and moping about her sad love life like his own cubicle roommate coworker, y/n.

“Darn, we’ll miss you there then.” Doyoung finds a way to exit the conversation, knowing his heart is already breaking thinking about Daisy spending her weekends out and about with another man. The fantasy of her is ruined.

“Aw, thank you Doyoung.” Daisy reaches underneath her desk and pulls out a familiar looking earbud case, “also, are you able to hand this back to y/n? They dropped this on their way in, but they were already rushing into an elevator before I could catch them. You two are dating, right?”

Doyoung’s lips part open in shock, hearing those words come from Daisy’s mouth entice a strange feeling. His initial reaction is to deny it, clearly, but she looks at him with such awe that he doesn't know what to say. “Where did you hear that?”

“Oh, I overheard a few people chatting about you two. I think people said you two moved in with each other after 5 months of dating.” Daisy innocently explains. “My boyfriend and I could never move in together, at least, not yet. I feel like we have to hit that two year mark before deciding to do so.” 

He chuckles awkwardly, unsure what he is more surprised about: Daisy’s boyfriend or the fact that there are actual rumors that he and y/n are dating. “We’re not dating, just roommates. We’re not even really close.”

“Oh, I’m sorry! I really thought you two were dating. Please don’t tell them I said anything.” Daisy covers her mouth and Doyoung accepts the earbuds. 

“Don’t worry, I won’t.” He forces a smile, bidding a small see you later to Daisy before heading back upstairs to his boring job. The dating rumor invades every part of his thoughts as he tosses the case back and forth between his hands. He is going to murder whoever spread such a heinous lie.

“Maybe we should stagger when we leave. I’ll go first and start my car, then you come down ten minutes later, walk around the lot and then get into my car.” Doyoung nibbles on his granola bar, leaning against the sink counter. Drying your tupperware, you stare at him in confusion.

“Why such an elaborate plan to just go home?” You question.

Doyoung shakes his head at you, as if you don’t think about the potential risks lying ahead. “Like you said, people start rumors so we should be careful.” 

Halting all your actions completely, you blink blankly at a nervous Doyoung. “You heard something, didn’t you?” 

“When did I–”

“Doyoung, I will rip that granola bar out of your hand. What was it?” 

He neatly places the wrapper back on, setting it down and crossing his arms. “There are rumors of us dating and that we moved in with each other after five months of dating, which in itself is already ridiculous. Obviously, I would wait longer than that to move in with my partner because you never really know if you’d last with that person and then, you’re stuck in an awkward living situation if you ever break up.” Doyoung huffs and puffs. 

Your facial expression doesn’t change, remaining completely unamused and blank as you listen to this man aimlessly derail from the main point. “Thanks for that.” Your tongue clicks and sarcasm laces your words. “I told you, didn’t I?”

“You have to be right all the time, don’t you?” He scoffs, annoyed and grows impatient with your lack of reaction. 

“Uh, with you? Most definitely.” You laugh, which Doyoung does not expect. “People are so bored here that they’ll make up the weirdest out of pocket thing about someone else. Us interacting is enough ammo for them to shoot some made up scenario.” 

“How are you so unphased by this?” 

You pack up your lunch boxes into your bag, “because I know none of it is true. I can barely stand you.” Pausing, you turn to face Doyoung fully. Your hand lightly pats his chest and he watches your every movement, the distance between the two of you closing in. “Like you said, let them think what they want.”

Now, it is Doyoung’s turn to remain speechless at the statement. He should really listen to his own advice.

When you were desperate for a place to live, it did come to your surprise that Doyoung came to your rescue. You two are very distant friends from college, a more accurate title would be acquaintances. Being in the same few clubs made him a familiar figure, but never anyone you personally got close to or spoke much with.

However, there was no harm in networking post-grad. If anything, it became an advantage to come from a big club with so many people aligned in the same field to gain insight into different companies, internships, and  potential job offers. You landed your current adult job with the help of a few connections and chats at career fairs. 

Nonetheless, the offer to move into Doyoung’s apartment was conditional. He had been laid off of his previous work and had to find a new job as soon as he could. Doyoung was able to land the job at your current company through your referral and you were approved to be a co-signer on the lease of the apartment. It felt fated to be and everything fell into its place perfectly, if only you two were compatible. 

The thing with Doyoung is that he always gave off a vibe that he was stuck up and prude. You also had an impression he didn’t like you during college due to you sleeping with his friend, Jaehyun, and breaking his heart when you didn’t want a relationship with him. When you first moved in, you gave Doyoung a lot of leeway but he always treated you coldly. At some point, you had enough of it and decided that he should get a taste of his own attitude. 

Nevertheless, your friendship worked better this way. You’re not entirely sure of the psychology behind it, but Doyoung seemed to communicate with you easier when you were at each other’s throats. All those enemies to lovers tropes you would read growing up were finally making sense to you. 

You two did grow closer when living together, but definitely not to the point where you two were best friends. Doyoung still kept you at arm's reach and so did you. There are a lot of things about him that you didn’t know about, it was quite actually last month that you learned that Doyoung had an older brother. It was only because he had stopped by to drop off some food for him from his mom. 

Doyoung is not the type to warm up to someone quickly, resembling a locked cabinet and a key that is lost somewhere. He is just waiting for the right person to find it. Due to this, you two live very separately at home. Doyoung is quick to rush into his own room and you’re often the one to wander around the living space before finding your way back to yours. 

So on this random weekend, you’re wondering why there is a soft knock at your door. Kicking the blankets off of your body, you rush over to open your closed bedroom door to reveal a messy bed hair Doyoung in his bunny pajama pants. 

“Hey, good….” Doyoung checks the time on his phone to be sure, lifting one eyebrow at your sleepy expression. “Evening.” 

“What do you want?” You groan, ready to let the door hit him in the face. “I get enough of you at work.” You rub your eyes to rid any junk stuck on your lashes. 

“Since your car is in the shop, I was wondering if you needed a ride to run any errands or to grab food. You haven’t left your room the whole day, so you must be hungry.”  His eyes dart left and right, avoiding eye contact as best as he can. Doyoung looks so sheepish, like a deer caught in headlights.

You can’t help, but laugh. “Aw, are you caring for me right now?” 

His face contours into complete disgust. “Not really. I just don’t want to find your dead body in the apartment and potentially get sued for negligence.”

“Well, I’m not hungry.” In that moment, your body couldn’t have had better timing. Your stomach rumbles loudly and Doyoung just blinks at you until it passes. 

You both break out into laughter, “fine, what are you getting for dinner?”

“There’s a new place in town that I’ve been eyeing. A bit upscale, if you’re down.” Doyoung starts walking toward his room, eyebrow raised and waiting for your confirmation. 

“You’re paying.” You close the door before he could protest. You and Doyoung have shared a few meals together, but nothing consistent. It’s not awkwardness that stops the both of you, but that there really isn’t much to chat about over a plate of food. Besides work, you two don’t share any of the same interests or the same circle of friends. 

On top of that, Doyoung would never open up over a sirloin steak. He barely opens up with a bottle of wine. You’ve given up trying to interrogate him with endless questions about his personal life, he never really asks about yours anyways. 

Though, meals with Doyoung aren’t entirely dreadful. His refined palate and hefty paycheck allows for you a delicious culinary experience. You’d never admit it, but eating with him was much better than eating alone.

Dressing for the occasion, you step out in an entirely new and refreshed vibe. Doyoung nearly chokes at the sight of you, not used to seeing you all dolled up and well, nicely dressed. Unintentionally, the accents of your colors match and Doyoung takes note of it, not throwing much of a fit as he usually would. 

“Matching is not a bad thing.” Doyoung clears his throat, hands slipping into his pressed pants and obvious aversion to eye contact.

“Matching with you it might be.” You snicker, but loved your attire too much to change into something else for the night. Both of you head out for dinner and you catch a whiff of something vibrant as Doyoung follows into his car. 

“New cologne?” The strap of the seat belt rustles in the quiet vehicle. Doyoung doesn’t say anything, turning on the engine and pulling out of the parking space with ease.

There is a long moment of silence, at this point you’ve concluded that he probably completely ignored your question. However, after a few blocks, Doyoung follows up with his own inquiry, “you like it?” 

Raising a brow, you’re finding his behavior quite peculiar tonight. It’s a bit unsettling and rather confusing. “I prefer your usual clean scent. This citrus doesn’t match you.”

Without a word of protest, Doyoung grins to himself at your words. Though, you’re too busy scrolling on your phone and participating in the usual silent atmosphere of the car ride.

“Have you thought of your Halloween costume for the happy hour?” Doyoung delicately cuts into his flank, twirling the piece of meat in the brown gravy that was neatly swirled on the plate.

You shrug, popping the broccolini into your mouth. There hasn’t been much thought about that email since it dropped in your inbox. If anything, you hadn’t even considered the fact that it was already October.  It felt like just yesterday you were on a rooftop bar in the warm summer sunset. 

“Any ideas?” You pat your hands on the cloth napkin on your lap, eyebrow raised toward Doyoung. Not that this man would give you any good ideas, you’re already settling on your last ditch effort costume you always went as during your college years.  

The restaurant is incredibly fancy, way more than you had been anticipating when he had mentioned it being a little upscale. It is moderately loud inside, but nothing above light chatter and the jazz music still audible over the voices. You two had been seated right away, the hostess having starry eyes the moment she saw Doyoung walk in. 

The waiters referred to you with proper titles and offered the wine of the night, placing it in its own separate small table. Anyone could have mistaken you and Doyoung for being a couple on a date, perhaps celebrating an anniversary or a nice date night. 

While at any other occasion you would make it incredibly obvious that isn’t the case, the food is too immaculate for you to care. The tenderness of your meat is melt worthy and the taste of garlic butter hits your palette lovingly. You were too busy indulging in the meal before Doyoung had spoken.

“Maybe something with a mask.” Doyoung responds after a rather long thoughtful silence. 

Your face deadpans, rolling your eyes at how silly it was to even ask him for a serious suggestion. “Ha! So funny.” Your sarcasm bites at his skin.

He flinches slightly at your tone, but places his fork and knife on the white table cloth. He wipes his lips with his napkin, “I’m not saying it to be mean. I meant it as a masquerade.” 

“Why would I wear a mask the whole night in front of our VPs?”

Doyoung shrugs in return, “isn’t the point of Halloween pretending to be someone you’re not? Or trying to hide behind a facade?” 

“That’s too philosophical. Halloween is about tricks, treats and pumpkins.” He laughs at your explanation, bringing the rim of his wine glass to his lips.

“That’s one way to view it.” He unbuttons his cufflinks and rolls his sleeves up to his elbows. Your eyes wander before your mind could remind you it's Doyoung you’re gawking at. “I might go with a mask, like a masked prince of some kind.” 

You laugh, “yeah, I’m sure Daisy will swoon over that.”

Doyoung doesn’t smile, instead he clears his throat uncomfortably. “She has a boyfriend and she’s not going.”

“Aw, I’m sorry to hear that your work crush has been diminished.” You pout, quite insincerely and mockingly. Doyoung scoffs at your statement, rolling his eyes at how he’s willing to entertain this. 

“It was never going to work out anyways. She thought you and I were together.” The statement nearly causes you to choke on your wine. He raises an eyebrow at the slight break in your careless reactions. 

“Wow, it traveled all the way to our receptionist. That’s how you know the whole office practically knows about it.” However, he read it all wrong as you began to speak. Your nonchalant answers bring Doyoung no reassurance as he watches with a quizzical look as you eat your mashed potatoes. 

“Maybe you like the thought of us being together.” Doyoung snickers. He doesn’t mean it, but he did want to shake up the atmosphere to see how playful he can get with you. 

You kick his shin under the table and he lightly jumps, “calm down, prince. Don’t want the commoners to know how much of a narcissist you are.” Narrowing your eyes at him, you grumble. The mashed potato now tasted a bit sour from Doyoung’s jokes. 

“C’mon, seriously? Do you actually think that I’m a narcissist?” Doyoung places a hand on his chest, as if you could be referring to anyone else. He is so dramatic, you think to yourself as you see him tap away a fake tear.

So you decide to be truthful and slightly hurtful, simply because he asked for it. “Yes, I genuinely do at times.” Your powerful tone in your words shocked Doyoung a bit, his head shaking a bit from the actual truth.

“Oh,” He clears his throat awkwardly, halting his playful demeanor. “Fuck, I’m sorry. I really didn’t mean to come off that way.” This is the first time you’ve seen him completely vulnerable in his apology. It is a sharp difference compared to his usual snarky “my bad” or “oops”. 

The hurt on his face is evident, pursing his lips on the rim of his wine glass and the thoughts flooding his heavy head. A part of you feels guilty, wondering if a line had been drawn. 

“Unfortunately, you’re still a likable person as people say.” You clear your throat and shift nervously in your seat. Doyoung looks up through hood eyes at your compliment, but holds back the grin that itches to form on his lips. 

Something about his gaze almost makes you falter, “why did you choose such a fancy place for dinner?” 

“Because I genuinely wanted to see what this place was all about. I’ve been hearing Greg from Finance brag about how he’s eaten here for the past two weekends.” Doyoung lightly taps the table with his index finger, like a habit he couldn’t grow out of.

“You let Greg of all people talk you into a $200 bill?” You can’t hold the laugh back because of how ridiculously easy Doyoung can be swayed by someone else’s opinions. “And what do you think about dinner tonight?

Doyoung may have mistaken the implication in your question — if there even was one. He halts his rhythmic tapping, sitting up to straight out his wrinkled shirt and gazing upon you right in front of him. 

“Dinner was…” The bill lands on the edge of the table and Doyoung flips open the book with one flick. He breaks focus from you for a quick second to look at the final grand number on the thin piece of paper. You barely get a glimpse, as he places his card down and shuts it swiftly. 

His eyes back fully on you, “most definitely worth it.” The smile on Doyoung’s face isn’t menacing or mockery, you’re completely convinced that it’s a smile meant for you. And, you’re unsure how to interpret the butterflies that flutter at the pit of your stomach. 

As if the day couldn’t get any worse, you walk into work with everyone in some bizarre work appropriate costume and staring at you as if you’re the odd one out. Your costume is in your bag, which Doyoung so graciously let you leave in the trunk of his car before coming in. However, you’re wondering if it's too late to dash back outside to grab it so you fit in with everyone else. 

“Good morning, y/n!” Daisy, a very chirpy and red painted smile, greets you routinely. Cute flower clips line her hair perfectly and the all green attire can only mean one thing: she is a flower. “What’s your costume?”

Laughing nervously, you’re finding a way out of this small talk. “It’s a surprise! You’ll see when we all leave for happy hour tonight.”

“I might be going before then, but please stop by if you have the time to get it on earlier.” She happily smiles, bidding you a small “have a good day!” before returning her focus back to her screen.

The elevator stops on your floor and it’s as if Jack Skellington came overnight and vomited Halloween all over the cubicles. There always has to be that one coworker who is obsessed with the holiday and they lovingly decorated the office before everyone came in. Including yours and Doyoung’s cubicle.

You’re awkwardly shuffling past your coworkers, saying small good mornings and getting weird looks. However, you’re trying very hard to not draw attention to being the only one not dressed up. A tiny baby pumpkin sits in front of your monitor and a neatly wrapped ghost cookie with your name written on a post it note awaits you. 

“Good morning!” Your coworker’s head pops from over the wall and incites a startled scream from you. Of course, she’s laughing giddily at successfully scaring the living out of you. 

“Hey Mariel, good morning. Did you make these?” There is no second guessing who else would be this enthusiastic about Halloween than Mariel is. She talked your ear off the day it hit October 1st about ghouls, goblins, and ghosts.

She even had a spooky countdown calendar of the days until the 31st. On top of that, she was the only one overly excited about the Halloween happy hour the moment the email hit everyone’s inbox.

“Of course. I do a baking side gig, I had to bring in a few spooky friendly treats for everyone in office!” She rests her chin on her palm and squints her eyes at you, “where’s your costume?”

Your palms immediately get sweaty. It’s like disappointing a kid on Christmas by telling them that Santa isn’t real or your mom buying you a nice and modest dress for graduation, but you accidentally stain it. The nervousness to answer creeps up your throat and before you can speak, a voice answers for you.

“Isn’t it classic of y/n to dress up as an office worker?” Doyoung stands up in his cubicle to interject himself in the conversation. 

Mariel nearly loses a lung from how hard she laughs at Doyoung’s corny attempt at a joke. “It’s actually classic of the both of you to not wear your costumes to work.” She adds, wiping the tears from her crinkled eyes. “What’s next? Matching costumes?” 

“Mariel, it’s a surprise.” Doyoung plays it off smoothly.

“Let me guess, Barbie and Ken?” She taps the counter, like a buzzer on a game show to lock in her answer. You’re already shaking your head and Mariel frowns.

Doyoung sighs loudly and dramatically, “I know, Mar. I’d be such a good Barbie, but y/n didn’t want to give that to me.” Oh god, he’s good.

You laugh along, stiffly. “Well, that was the end of our potential matching costumes. We went our separate ways and you’ll see mine later today.” It is enough to get Mariel off of your back about not dressing up at work. Hurrying to settle your things, Doyoung walks around to your side. 

“Did you see how beautiful Daisy looked?” He muses, daydreaming about the whimsical fantasy of the office receptionist. “Must be a lucky guy.”

“She looks like a true flower.” You’re mindlessly unloading your essentials from your work bag and only half listening to Doyoung ramble. “Damn it, I left my coffee in your car.” Throwing your hands up in frustration, you’re already running late for your first meeting of the day with your supervisor. 

Doyoung doesn’t wait a second to push you back into your seat, thinking you could make a quick sprint if he had handed you his keys. “I’ll get it for you. Patricia already asked about your whereabouts.” He smoothly reaches over your shoulder to grab your laptop, the usual scent of his clean cologne brushes your nostrils lightly as the distance between you closes briefly. 

Your heart is pounding in your ears at the proximity, looking up at Doyoung’s long exposed neckline with his collarbones barely peeking out from his linen shirt. Under this dreary fluorescent office lighting, Doyoung looks rather dreamy. 

Nonetheless, you shake off this sudden and weird daydream when he hands you your laptop and makes his merry way to get you your coffee. You’ve got to be losing your mind, the mundane suffocating atmosphere of an office space is causing you to seek any thrills. You’re being delusional. You could never have feelings for Doyoung, of all the people, never Doyoung.

You come back from your meeting to your coffee neatly placed next to your monitor on a coaster and your bag with your costume in your chair. Silently, you grab your tote and rush off to the bathroom to change before anyone could notice your appearance and sudden disappearance. 

It wasn’t an extravagant costume and it was most definitely not the store bought ones from a pop-up Spirit shop. A black cat has been your go-to DIY last minute costume since college for those rendezvous frat parties or a drunk Halloween night out with your friends. Since it had to be work appropriate, a sexy black cat is out of the picture. 

Smoothing the strands of your hair to adjust the cat ear headband, you give yourself small whiskers with your black eyeliner. “Here’s to Halloween.” A small grumble to yourself, you’re out of the bathroom and briskly walking between cubicles in your slightly form fitting all black attire. 

Your head down and laying low, hoping that Mariel doesn’t notice your costume before you get to your own corner. Making it down the runway, Doyoung’s back is turned and completely working his life away. Somehow, your presence behind him causes a breakaway and he’s spinning around before you could hide back into your cubicle. 

“Thanks, Doyoung.” A small murmur escapes, but Doyoung hears you loud and clear. He doesn’t say anything, instead, his eyes rapidly take in your figure and change of attire. The cat ears on your head cause him to blush, something he didn’t know you could do to him so easily.

“A recurring costume, I’ll admit it’s better than my mask idea.” He gestures, awkwardly clearing his throat at the weird tension that rose from his obvious gawking. 

You’re puzzled, “I can’t recall a time you would’ve seen me like this.” It’s true, you two never spent a Halloween together since you had moved in with him and perhaps, those drunk college nights are too hazy for you to be too sure of yourself.

Doyoung chuckles to himself, peering down at his hands as he delightfully remembers the vivid memory of him catching a glimpse of you for the first time. “Halloween, third year. It was at the NCT yearly ‘Monster Mash’ party. I saw you briefly in the kitchen, looking through the empty bottles of liquor for a drink.”

Then it hits you! That was the night that you had arrived late to the party and almost ditched when there was no more booze left, but you encountered Jaehyun.

“That was so long ago! Wow,” your finger resting on your chin and looking back on the good ole times, “I can’t believe you remembered something like that.” Your voice grows smaller at the end of your sentence, full realization hitting you that Doyoung has known you before you had known him. He kept that memory to himself all these years.

Doyoung, also equally as shocked, feels caught in headlights. Nonetheless, something in his heart wants to open up to you and this feels like an open door opportunity. However, he isn’t sure if he is ready to ruin the dynamic the two of you share. What if he opens more than you’d take? One foot in the door, he can’t imagine this fleeting feeling would come again.

“I couldn’t get you out of my head that night.” He wholeheartedly admits and a heavy tug pulls at your heart. Your jaw drops slightly at his confession and your thoughts are running at godspeed. Doyoung’s heart is pounding in his ears. 

Before you could say anything, Mariel is walking back to her cubicle and is quick to address your costume. You’re half hearing her, mind still stuck on Doyoung’s words and wondering how differently your lives would have been if Doyoung had approached you that night instead of Jaehyun. What could have been? 

Rustic wooden panels cover the walls of The 127 Bar and Restaurant, giving it that upscale cabin/lodge-feel. Cobwebs lined with plastic spiders and pumpkins with ghoul expressions litter the corners of the counters. Festive Halloween music is muffled by the loud ambiance of chatter. You’re already counting down the hour of when it's socially acceptable for you to leave. 

Coworkers dressed in costumes is a silly concept to you, mainly because you don’t associate anything fun with work and you definitely don’t want to see your coworkers in anything else besides their slacks and button ups. Doyoung, however, beats that exception as he walks in with a black velvet cape and fake blood dribble down his chin. His suit vest is surely something straight out of his own wardrobe and there is way too much hair gel slicked in his hair.

“A vampire fits you much better than a masked prince.” Whether it is meant as an insult or a compliment, Doyoung smiles at your comment. 

“A black cat and a vampire, can we be any more cheery?” Doyoung says sarcastically, earning a small laugh as you look upon your very dark attires for the night.

Shrugging, you lightly pat his shoulder to guide him toward the VPs. “We all can’t be Daisy. She takes the cake for having optimism in this cruel corporate world. Now, let’s go get our attendance points so we can leave earlier.”

“A black cat mind reader? That elevates your costume a bit.” Doyoung smirks, leading the way to a doomful 15 minute conversation with important people. 

Doyoung surprises you by how social he can get. You two normally attend the usual happy hours that your coworkers like to have after work, but that is mostly among a few that sit on your floor. This mixer included every department and Doyoung jumps conversation to the next with ease and speed, you could hardly keep up.

“Okay, social butterfly. I haven’t heard you talk so much since college club meetings.” Raising an eyebrow, you’re stopping Doyoung from approaching another coworker dressed as a skeleton. 

“I haven’t seen you this quiet in a while. What’s wrong? Cat’s got your tongue?” He blinks at you with a dull expression.

Suddenly, you’re feeling self-conscious at how he noticed your silence. “Corporate happy hours aren’t my thing. I don’t particularly have interests with any of these people.” 

Doyoung purses his lips, “yet you seem to talk endlessly with me and we have nothing in common.” 

Clearing your throat, you’re unsure of this strange feeling in your chest. You and Doyoung have commonality in background – school, clubs, mutuals, profession – but interests seem to be way far out of scope for the two of you. While the few dinners you two would share are rather silent, it doesn’t eat you alive the same way corporate social events do. Despite the forced close proximity, you don’t know if you and Doyoung would actually be friends with each other. 

“Right, but it’s different for us.” Trying to save the sinking ship seems harder to do as you rack your brain for an argument. 

Doyoung tilts his head slightly, “different? How is it different?” In that moment, there is a shift in his demeanor as he tucks his hands into his pants pockets and leans back slightly on his heels. A hooded stare, eyebrow raised, and a smug smirk waits to hear how your relationship with Kim Doyoung is so different compared to your other coworkers. 

Feeling small under his gaze, you’re wondering why a heat travels across your cheeks. The Halloween music and robust atmosphere are completely tuned out at this point. “We have common things to talk about besides work, like mutuals! I don’t know– you just get me. Lately, I feel like you’ve been opening up a bit more.”

Doyoung nearly beams hearing the last part of your ramble because he feels exactly the same. You just get him, despite always being at each other’s throats. He knows that this banter would not work with anyone else, it had to be you.

It’s like with each interaction, you get closer to the key in unlocking everything about him. Without your knowledge, he so badly wishes you to be the one to find it. 

“Hey you two!” Greg from Finance wraps his arms around Doyoung’s shoulders, appearing rather abruptly and startling the both of you. “How was your date at Bodega 127?” 

Your eyeballs nearly fall out of your socket at the word date being thrown carelessly when referring to you and Doyoung. Doyoung reacts quite nervously and is shocked as well at the odd choice of wording Greg decided to use. 

“I wouldn’t call it a date...” Doyoung chuckles, exchanging anxious glances with you. 

“Yeah, we’re not together.” You jump in with Doyoung at denying such a bold accusation. 

“Oh, come on! There’s no need to feel embarrassed. The whole office knows already, what’s the point in trying to hide it?” Greg continues to poke the bear. 

“I can see how it might come off that way, but Doyoung and I aren’t into each other like that.” Your eyes bounce between a skittish Doyoung and an overly-pushy Greg. “Right, Doyoung, you don’t like me that way?” You’re begging him with your stare, but for some reason, Doyoung hesitates long enough for you to notice.

“Uh yeah. We’re just coworkers.” He averts making eye contact with you and you’re thrown off your tracks at how off-putting he is being. You’re trying to hold back the confusion from showing on your face, but Greg takes the bait.

“Okay, I’ll stop berating you two about your relationship. But when Doyoung told me he brought you there, I will say I thought it was for a date night y’all were having. It’s that type of restaurant experience, y’know?” Greg lightly pats Doyoung on the back before walking off to chat with another group of coworkers. 

You’re standing still next to Doyoung and wondering why the fuck he hesitated when you asked him such an easy question. He doesn’t look your way, gaze remains glued to the floor.

“I think we should leave now.” He says, dashing toward Patricia to let her know of your exits. A sigh escapes your body, completely confused and lost at every feeling roaming in your chest.

The drive back home is completely silent. The elephant in the room becomes bigger at every stoplight. Most of the trip is you staring out the window, trying to process the last few scenes at the happy hour. Doyoung remains focused on the drive, so much that he forgets to put music on to distract from the stiffness in the air. 

When you two finally make it back up to the apartment, you’re the first to break the awkward silence. “Hey, uh– thanks for driving me around these past few days. The car shop told me that my car is ready tomorrow, so I won’t need to carpool with you anymore.”

He nods, despite the long sinking feeling of his heart reaching the bottom of his stomach. He has had so much fun with you lately being around him, he isn’t sure if he’s ready to go back to how things were — living so separately in the same place.

“Sorry about Greg.” Doyoung rubs the back of his neck, “I didn’t know he would say something like that.” He gently wipes off the dried fake blood on his chin.

“We’re used to it, right?” The airy, lightness in your tone puzzles Doyoung. “At least he was courageous enough to actually address it to our faces instead of contributing to the gossip in the office.” 

“He’s just a big idiot.” Doyoung unties his cape and tosses it over the couch. “I shouldn’t have told him we went together.”

It somewhat offended you, “what? You don’t want to be seen with me or something?” You toss your headband onto the dining room table, fixing your hair back to its normal state.

However, Doyoung perks up at the evident tone in your voice and the scorn in your expression. “It’s not that.” 

“You know, Doyoung, you have been really confusing lately.” There is a pause before you continue, wondering how you should word this without sounding so rash.

“First, you’re knocking on my door and asking me to dinner. Then, you’re getting me my coffee from the car. And, you hesitated back there when I said you didn’t like me and our conversations recently have been different, so open ended.” 

Doyoung leans against the couch, arms crossed and  intently listening to your speech. “Are you implying that I have feelings for you?”

He sounds so snarky that it causes your skin to crawl, frustration fuels your soul at how delusional he is making you seem. “I’m just stating the facts.” 

Doyoung scoffs, arms falling back to his sides. A minute passes, but it feels nearly like forever given the silence in the room and how his eyes are glued to the ground, full of contemplation. However, not just any careless amount of contemplation, but real and genuine assessment on how he has felt over the past two weeks with you.

He opens his mouth to speak, but falls short of formulating a coherent sentence and feels a bit choked up and confused by himself. Though, you’ve been standing there and waiting for him and the silence has made you incredibly uncomfortable. “It’s a reach. There’s no possible way for you to harbor any feelings for me. We made that really clear to each other.” 

You’re turning to hide back into your room, but Doyoung quickly stands at your door frame, alert and before you. “It’s not entirely a reach….” He mumbles, “I can’t say confidently that I have true and full romantic feelings toward you, but I have been seeing you in a romantic light.” 

“I don’t fully understand what you mean.” Your eyebrows knit together, finding that his speech sounds too much like a riddle. 

He takes a deep breath in, exhaling to calm the waking nerves in his throat. “I’m beginning to understand that some of what I feel towards you is romantic, like I don’t want to stop being around you or I want to go out of my way to do things that make your life easier.” He smirks coyly to himself, breaking the intense exchange of dialogue between the both of you briefly, “I’m an acts of service kind of guy.” 

“Look, I’m saying that yes, I think I’m starting to have feelings for you. It wasn’t until recently did I feel like we’ve really gotten to spend time together after you’ve moved in.” His shoulders drop, “and I don’t know, I just– like you said, you just get me.”

This moment between the both of you is so real. There are no gimmicks, no foul play, no teasing and banter. Doyoung means every word he is saying. While a part of you wants to joke around and say something snarky, the other part of you feels serious and rather shocked at this confession.

Never in your mind did the potential of Doyung catering feelings toward you exist. And now, even more than ever, you’re actually reflecting on your own thoughts toward him. Doyoung is the first person you want to go to in a crowded room, it’s like you’re searching for him without realizing it. He’s the one you want to rely on, knowing how capable and responsible he is. Doyoung, given the chance, can really brighten up the room. 

If there was anyone in this world he chose to open up to, you wanted it to be you. 

“Can I kiss you?” Doyoung almost stopped himself from saying it, but he had to know. Your eyes are beyond huge at his request, the sound of thumping in your chest growing in your ears.

“What?” You croak, taken aback by this random out-of-character question. Doyoung’s cheeks are as bright red as a tomato, but he doesn’t break his intense eye contact. 

“Kiss me, I want to know if my feelings are real.” He steps a bit closer with lips parted slightly, rosy cheeks, and dilated pupils. Your shaky hands slowly reach to cup his face and there the beating of your heart quickens, fast enough to where you think you could faint. 

“If we kiss and neither of us feel anything, we’ll pretend it never happened.” You’re trying to cushion any chance at rejection, so that it wouldn’t end in complete disappointment from either one of you. It’s to soften the blow. 

Nevertheless, Doyoung nods in your hot hands and brings your chin close with the pull of his finger. Your lips pucker and land gently on his, your eyes still wide open and you’re in utter shock that Kim Doyoung, the man you thought you’d never kiss, is now kissing you. 

It’s as if fuel added to a flame, the fire in your stomach grows violently at this connection. Doyoung swears he could feel a sudden spark in his tight chest, electricity running in veins.

He pulls away and the contact between you two breaks as quick as it connected. He simply blinks at you, with a cute doe-eyed expression and red cheeks. You’re blinking back, heart in your throat and a desire to kiss him again. 

“Are your feelings real?” You ask him a question you’re scared to know the answer to, worried that he didn’t feel that same fire as you did from that kiss and he’d ask to pretend it never happened.

“Real, absolutely real.” Doyoung confirms with a breathy speech. He can’t pinpoint how long these feelings have been locked away and how long he has ignored them. Nonetheless, that kiss proves so much to himself, one being that he is way more head over heels for you than he thought. 

And the next course of action he chooses may ruin your current dynamic completely, but he fully and utterly wants to commit to you. He doesn’t tell you, worried that it may scare you off when he only wishes to hold you close.

The two of you stare into each other’s eyes for a brief moment of silence with tensions high and hearts beating fast. Both are unaware of how to proceed without making things awkward or shifting too greatly from your banterful friendship. 

So, Doyoung eases in with a request so telling, but gentle enough for the two of you to agree upon. “Let me drive you to work from now on.” 

Your eyes glimmer with a shine, clearing your throat before you speak. “Is this about our carbon footprint or something else?”

He chuckles, “we’re saving the Earth while I also get to spend more time getting to know you, it sounds like a win - win situation to me.” 

“And the rumors?” 

Doyoung leans down to whisper gently into your ear, “let them think what they want.” The same shivers that ran through your body before had returned, but accompanied with butterflies dancing lovingly in your stomach.

Strange how two weeks ago, you thought that the possibility of romantically being with Doyoung was close to none and the best way to describe the two of you was that you just coexisted together. But, here you two are: standing in the middle of your shared living room with sparkling eyes for each other and a newfound excitement for a new relationship, more than just coexisting.

[gotta-winwin]

(🎄) ... mirth and good cheer - xmas special teaser

⭐ starring: vernon

🎄preview: vernon used to fly back to new york every christmas for one reason only: his childhood best friend. christmas used to be his and y/n’s thing, until he got seemingly too busy to ever return. now, as y/n departs to korea for the first time, she can’t help but wonder if her and vernon would ever cross paths again. vernon, unbeknownst to her, has been wondering the exact same thing. as the boys set up their christmas tree in their dorm, he does his best to ignore how hints of y/n still seemed to linger throughout the holiday air. 

tw/cw: idol!vernon x nonidol!reader, childhood friends to lovers, estranged friends, slight miscommunication, fluff, slight angst, best christmas romcom vibes, features svt members, stubborn!reader, equallystubborn!vernon, use of y/n, flips between past and present day

🐻‍❄️ release date: christmas day

☁️ masterlist & a/n: dropping a vernon x reader fic for our xmas special! doesn't vernon just scream childhood bestie to lover (੭˃ᴗ˂)੭ i just know i'm going to have sm fun writing this cuz the dynamic is so interesting! its already giving christmas romcom vibes and omg you guys are not ready.

11 DAYS FROM CHRISTMAS 2024:

“That’s not how it’s supposed to work.” Mingyu slapped Vernon’s hand away from the tree they were decorating. “It’s supposed to be symmetrical, not whatever you’re doing.”

Vernon had to admit he wasn’t really paying attention. Their dorm auntie, the one who came around once a week to clean up the place, had baked them gingerbread men as a Christmas gift, and the smell felt like it had seeped into the walls of their dorm. It was a nostalgic smell, one that took him back to his childhood, new york and-

“Vernon?” Mingyu waved a hand in front of his face. “Are you even listening right now?”

He blinked, brought back from his thoughts. “Sorry, hyung. What?”

Mingyu could only let out a deep sigh, moving to place the bauble where he intended it to be. “You’re like this every Christmas. If you miss her so much, why don’t you just fly back?”

Vernon didn’t really know why he wasn’t flying back. He certainly could be, they were off work for the holidays and a plane ticket back wasn’t hard to find. He would be doing himself a favor, putting himself out of misery and finally seeing his childhood best friend. The thing was, he wasn’t really sure if Y/N wanted to see him. He shrugged. “I don’t miss her.” It was a lie and everyone in the room knew it. 

CHRISTMAS DAY 2003: 

Everyone who knew either of them would say they were smart kids for their age. Both only five, they whispered secrets to each other like little middle schoolers would on the playground. 

“My parents say I’m going to Korea.” Vernon whispered to Y/N as they watched a christmas movie. “Forever.” Vernon always had a dramatic, theatrical side to him, even as a child.

Y/N could only frown. “Forever? Why?” She couldn’t imagine her best friend moving anywhere without her. “Am I going too?” 

Vernon mirrored her frown on his own face. “I don’t know.” Sensing her sadness, he reached over and gave her a hug. “I’ll visit every year.” He promised. 

“Every christmas.” Y/N insisted. She had always loved christmas above all else. “So we can watch movies again.”

Vernon agreed. “Okay. Every christmas. It’ll be like-” He paused, his young mind searching for the word. “Tradition.” He smiled at her, proud of the big word. 

“Promise?” Y/N stared at him with wide eyes, reaching out with her pinky, extended. “Pinky promise me.” 

Vernon grasped her pinky with his, shaking it firmly. He felt like a grown up, making one of those important business deals. “I promise.” Turning back to the screen, he let out a whine when he realized they had missed the best part. “We missed the part where the grinch screams down the mountain.” He complained. “I wanted to watch that part.”

Y/N got up, searching for the remote. “I’ll turn it back.” 

Their dynamic never changed, even as they grew older. Vernon walked through life, Y/N following behind him with eyes filled with admiration, gently nudging the boy whenever he got distracted and began walking off-track. It stayed that way even with the distance, until one Christmas, Y/N woke up and Vernon had not returned. 

CHRISTMAS DAY 2016:

“Mom?” Y/N called as she walked slowly down the stairs. She had returned home from university for the holidays and was confused when Vernon wasn’t at his usual spot to welcome her home. “Where’s Vernon?” He was usually back from Korea by now.

She didn’t like the look of pity her mother was giving her. “He didn’t tell you, honey? He’s been so busy with work, looks like he can’t fly back to join us for christmas this year.”

She felt her heart sink. She had been looking forward to spending time with him, even if it was just a couple of days out of the year. “Oh.” Of course, she understood. His work was important and she was sure the kpop industry couldn’t be easy. “That’s okay. I guess he must’ve been too busy to tell me.” 

--

“What are you still doing here?” Joshua frowned at Vernon, who was lying down on his bed. “Shouldn’t you be in New York by now?” He was used to Vernon flying back to New York every christmas since they had met. 

Vernon let out a huff. “Not going back this year, Josh.” 

“Why not?” His friend pressed, confused. Vernon was usually so excited to go back. “Isn’t your friend going to be sad?”

“I can’t miss any more practice before our comeback. One Christmas should be fine.” Vernon explained, although his voice betrayed his disappointment. He had been looking forward to going back home, to be able to see Y/N again. He thought to himself that one christmas couldn’t hurt, right?

One christmas missed turned into two. Then four. Then the timing felt too long and awkward and Vernon just never got the confidence to ever go back.

10 DAYS FROM CHRISTMAS 2024: 

Korea was beautiful underneath a sheet of snow. Y/N had landed last night, having made up her mind to give living in Korea a try. Ever since graduating university and landing a job as a screenwriter, her friends and family had always urged her to try working for the Korean film scene. 

She supposed she had always just avoided the country because of Vernon.

Her new job writing for some K-drama started after New Years. She thought maybe spending Christmas in a new place would bring back the mirth and good cheer the holiday used to give her, but she knew she was here for a different reason. A selfish and pathetic one. It burned her, that a part of her still wished to bump into Vernon after all these years. She knew he was doing well, SEVENTEEN was soaring through new heights and she had kept tabs on his ongoing success. It was the only way she kept going: his large internet presence sometimes made it feel like he never even left at all.

It hurt her the most that he could be doing so well without ever seeing her again.

Rounding the corner to the coffee shop, she rubbed her raw hands to regain heat. Ordering, she was relieved to find out she could still hold a conversation in Korean. It had gone rusty, the only people she ever used Korean with back home was Vernon’s dad and sister. 

“Hello?” Someone from behind her tapped her on the shoulder. “Do I know you from somewhere?”