#omg going back to my roots with the tiniest little fragment in the world

[autisticlancemcclain]

“No.”

“Good to see you too, Lance,” Keith says, amused. “Thank you for your concern; yes I am doing well. Blade work is hard work, yadda yadda, happy to be back. Good talk.”

“No,” Lance insists, much more vehemently. “This can’t — no.”

Keith smirks, raising an eyebrow. “Something the matter, Bluebell?”

“You’re wearing lifts,” Lance accuses.

Instead of answering, Keith simply takes off his boots. He is still, however, just barely taller than Lance, even thought Lance is still wearing his shoes.

“Spinal elongation surgery is cheating,” Lance tries, a little desperate. “So it doesn’t count.”

Keith’s smirk only gets wider. “I didn’t have any surgery, you goober.”

“You did! You — had to! It’s the only explanation!”

“The only explanation?”

“Yes! You’re not fucking taller than me! I refuse to accept it! No!”

Laughing, Keith leans close, arms crossed over his chest. Lance scowls, eyebrows furrowed over angry brown eyes.

“Hey, Lance.”

“Fuck off.”

“It’s important.”

“Nothing is more important than you going to go fuck yourself.”

“Lance.”

Finally Lance snaps. “What?!”

“You look cuter from up here.”

“I am going to shoot you,” Lance threatens. His cheeks are red, and he’s looking anywhere but at Keith. “When you least expect it. I’m not even gonna use stunner bullets. You’re going to get murdered.”

“If you can manage to aim that high, sure,” Keith teases.

Is he being dramatic and annoying over a four inch growth spurt?

Yeah.

Is it his God-given, natural right to drive Lance insane about this?

Also yes. Lance lorded their stupid minuscule height difference over Keith for years. Keith is never going to let this go.

———

based on this art by @anonaeonn