#omg I still remember when I first began to play and how I found the game

[hazelfoureyes]

The Radio Demon Fucks a Human Sacrifice (epilogue)

Mom gets fitted for dentures next week 🎊 🎉 🦷 💝

Epilogue (Promises)

You had meant it when you said it so long ago. A promise. One you intended to keep

「Warnings/Promises: Alastor x Fem Reader, Valentino x Fem reader (just TRUST ME), nipple chain, Val exists too much, Kaiju cock, pussy wet??, aphrodisiac, Alastor shade, fanatic sinners, misleading porno covers, Angel Dust is perfect as always, blood, stabbing, filming sexy things, Val in a thong, licking, hair pulling, why bad man have big dick, Alastor isn’t horny but he is possessive, pussy in the ether」

Part 1 smut 💦 Part 2 smut 💦 Side Story Part 3 smut 💦 Part 4 smut💦 Epilogue sexual

***Spoiler for people that need Val warnings*** Val dick touches reader pussy. Val explicit scenes are purple. if you skip the purple parts you will still understand the story and still be in the scene, interacting with him. Reminder, reader is there intentionally and consenting.

minors omg look over there! (🏃‍♀️💨Dni)

“I will admit, I was surprised to get your message.” Val exhaled, one hip out as he rest his weight on his right foot. You hadn’t planned on seeing him again, but as you became comfortable in hell you found yourself remembering the promise to yourself. One you made that day you met Alastor. On the floor of that studio. Your eyes scanned the room. The space was different, the set no longer your cursed cabin scene.  “To what do I owe the pleasure?”

You took a deep breath, you’d practiced this, “Well I’ve been in hell for a while now… and I see you everywhere. I’ve been thinking,” your eyes caught on the door you were confident led to the room that held you. To the bed. Another shaky exhale, you never were much of an actress. “I really missed my chance with you. A powerful overlord… a celebrity.”

A dark chuckle from the moth, his ego fluttering, “Ooh, you’re a little celebrity in your own right. My best seller in ages.”

Oh, right. The tape. You hadn’t watched it yet. Alastor set the VHS copy on the bookshelf, an agreement made you could revisit that memory together if you ever wanted to. Not that you hadn’t heard it before. Nearly two years after its release and still people played it in public. Your first visit to Rosie started with you red faced and sputtering, having had someone on the way there thrust a DVD in front of you. 

The stranger asked for an autograph, but as soon as you saw the cover photo the entire thing had been knocked into the street by Alastor’s microphone. He had been trying to shelter you from interacting too much with the movie.

“Was that—is the cover—?” You were frozen as the sinner ran off, mind trying to process the image.

Alastor hummed, “Not what I’d choose, but I signed away all rights when I made the deal. A little misleading of a photo if you ask me.” He watched with glee as a car pulverized the disc and case. 

A blood red demonic seal splattered with a white liquid and a slender hand scraping into the wood.

“But that’s the Vees for you!”

Indeed, that was the Vees. Val gestured at you with his cigarette and its dramatic holder, “Aren’t you still with the radio demon? Not that I care.” He took a few steps towards you, getting you into arm’s reach before grabbing you by the back of the head and pulling you into him, “Just cuz there's a goalie doesn’t mean I can’t score.”

With how your head was angled back as he had your hair tightly wound in his fist you could see the TV. Always Vox News, you assumed. The time was displayed in the corner. “I am but— he doesn’t, ya know… he doesn’t know I’m here. But he’ll be looking for me soon.”

He stared down at you, pupil-less eyes without emotion. Your scalp began to burn and after a few seconds you had to shift your weight to relieve some of the pull. It made your upper stomach rub against his crotch. Not at all your intention. But you knew you’d have to touch him eventually.

“Unfortunately for you, I don’t do shit at anyone else’s speed.” His hand released your hair, “Could be fun though…,” Valentino traced along your jaw with his tongue before squeezing your cheeks in his hand, “fucking Alastor’s woman.”

He was off you as quickly as he had pounced, makeshift jacket swirling behind him as he spun around and walked to the door you’d seen before.

Another glance at the television. You had 10 minutes before Alastor would be calling. A small panic that you didn’t have enough time. 

Alastor rarely called on you, because rarely were you very far away. He didn’t have you on a leash, you just enjoyed his company. You’d scroll on your phone while he worked in his radio station  or read a book while he enjoyed his breakfast in the morning. 

Also, well, going out alone could be intimidating. People swung from two extremes when they saw you— excited fan or terrified sinner. 

The fans knew you were with Alastor. 

The other sinners knew you were with Alastor. 

The DVD incident had spooked you, not helped by the fact it had been your first outing. Alastor had been eager, even if he didn’t say it, to introduce you to the cannibal overlord. 

Having you back in his presence brought a deep seated sense of calm to him, one best compared to the feeling he had when gossiping with Rosie over coffee. Naturally he wanted his closest friend to meet the soul who’d stolen his attention. And Rosie was delighted to meet you, evident with the extravagant tea (and a singular coffee)  she set up and her litany of questions.

But every time she asked something she also seemed to answer it herself.

“Are you happy to be together again in your body?! I’m sure you are.” She offered you a finger you had to decline. 

“I bet you two have been busy.” A wink, “Though you must have been for it to take so long to get down here.”

Alastor shrunk a little as she smacked at his shoulder. You hadn’t seen him allow others to touch him before. Had that been Angel, the second one of his many arms cocked back Alastor would have stepped away or disappeared. Just a hit and you could see how close they were.

You made a point of befriending her, coming often after that initial meeting to her shop for gossip and advice. As time went on, you began to learn about Alastor’s normal. It was nice to have a mutual friend to discuss your worries and ideas with. 

“And oh! That video. Talk about hot under the collar!”, a petite laugh, “Did you see it?” Rosie waited for you to answer this time. When you shook your head no, she waved her hand, “For the best. The climax was totally unwatchable!”

You turned to Alastor, not sure what that meant, but he didn’t meet your gaze and instead slowly blinked out of sync at the bookshelves behind Rosie’s shoulder. 

“Did you know he’s not into all that?” She took a sip, “You better be patient with him ya got it?”

That question caught you off guard. Apparently for him too, Alastor coming back to life at the change of tone, “This isn’t really a tea topic, dear friend.”

Rosie hummed, “Where are my manners! I was just so relieved he didn’t up and leave for another seven years.” 

What’s a scowl shared between friends?

But shared between whatever you and Val were…?

Valentino’s wings unfurled revealing long fishnet covered legs. You watched as he swayed his hips side to side on his way to the bed. The same bed as before. You remembered the shape and purple comforter that you could see down your blindfold.

“Oh, I wasn’t expecting you to already be undressed.” Where were his pants and button up? This was moving faster than you’d anticipated. 

He turned back to you as he plopped down onto the bed, “What I wear isn’t any of your business. Though, speaking of business.” He pointed to the corner, a part of the room you’d never seen before. A camera on a tripod stood there. “Turn it on.”

Your grimace was immediate. “You sure you wanna film this one?”

Impatient, he crossed his legs and leaned back on two hands, “Did you think you could just come in here, ask to fuck me and … what? It’d be all on your terms?”

Yes. 

You’d worn a dress expressly for ease, and slipped off your panties before going to the camera. For some reason you didn’t want that recorded. It seemed embarrassing. More so than what you were about to do.

Val’s turn to gawk, “You’re seriously not planning on staying dressed.”

“What I wear isn’t any of your business.” You opened the view screen and hit record.

His laugh was dark and deep, “Ooh, I forgot how feisty you were. Maybe this can be a recurring thing.”

Ignoring the comment, you tried to take in the details of the room, checking the walls and small bits of furniture. But you were immensely distracted by the moth demon, who had taken to spreading his legs open and running a hand down his barely contained bulge. Tiny, little, itty black thong, fishnets, nipple chain and… well, the hat. 

Two arms pulled you by the waist, hands gripping the flesh of your ass through the dress. 

“Why are you dressed like you’re off to teach Sunday school?” His hands slipped under the fabric and dug into your bare skin. He glanced at the camera and its small monitor to make sure he was in frame.

Your knees were brought to either side of his legs before he began to open his stance wider and wider. The action lowered your center more and more until your naked heat was resting on his package. Things were speeding up, he was moving you around so effortlessly. A problem, an absolute problem.

“Ya know I haven’t had a believable good girl to break in awhile.” His hips rose of the bed suddenly and made you bounce on his growing erection. Val groaned, a sound that made your skin crawl. 

In the reflection of his glasses you saw the white face of a marble clock on the wall behind you. 

“Could we—- can we do this lying down? Missionary? It’s been awhile and I’m feeling insecure.” The thought of the overpowering demon towering on top of you and pinning you down was… a tad terrifying. But you needed to see the clock, you couldn’t keep turning around. 

A brief thought, maybe just turning around on his lap and staying facing away from him would work, but then you remembered the camera. Didn’t need your now-rising dress to give the Vees anything exploitative to keep.

Not that everyone in all nine rings hadn’t already seen you spread open and screaming on camera.

“Actually maybe it’s okay, I can,” turn around? Your suggestion was cut short.

Val lifted you like a toy and flipped around. Your head hit the bed hard, brain jostling in your skull. One hand instinctively came to his chest to keep some distance. “No, I like this better.” A wide grin as he settled between your legs.

You leaned to the right to see the clock past his shoulder. Five minutes.

Why didn’t you wear a watch? Fuck.

He dropped his lower half onto you until his full weight was pressing his half hard cock into your stomach. Your breath tightened, running out of moveable space to expand your lungs and diaphragm.

“I wanna see you squirm.” Pink smoke was blown directly into your face, catching you off guard. But, where was the cigarette? You didn’t see it…

Your muscles went loose, the stress of the moment washing away. Both of your hands came to the center of your chest and pressed down. Security. Readiness.

Four minutes.

Alastor didn’t like you having a phone but he didn’t stop you from owning one. You had assumed you’d be on the set where you knew there would be some way to keep track of the time. Or else you’d have just worn a dress with pockets to carry a cellphone. Maybe set a timer.

You weren’t sure about Alastor’s disdain for tech until you witnessed it yourself. That square headed stalker flitting from screen to screen, riding the wires and the radio waves. He had warned you about the Vees, about Vox in particular. He didn’t have much to say about Velvette, and somehow that was better than the nothing he had to say about Valentino. 

As Val’s tongue slid up your neck, you thought about Angel. A confidant. You wished he had asked Alastor to kill Val, as a thank you for his efforts in reuniting you two. And, now that you remembered, uniting you at all. 

Instead he asked for a bigger room. Large enough for two to comfortably cohabitate.

Alastor maybe couldn’t kill Val, but he could try. When you brought it up with him he was upset. He didn’t like his name being spoken at all unless absolutely necessary 

An inadvertent moan you didn’t realize came from you until Valentino chuckled at the sound.

“Feeling it?” He cooed. You weren’t sure which it he meant. This wasn’t going quite to plan. 

Three minutes.

So much could happen in three minutes. Too much. He slid down his underwear, sitting up and letting you see him in his full glory.

Why did he have to be such a bad man?

Many men who carried big sticks were unkind. Between their legs or between their fingers. 

Alastor was an exception to the rule. 

Things did calm down for Alastor after you returned, eventually. Alastor’s desperate need was soothed with you in hell again. His appetite dying. But he hungered in new ways. Ways you hadn’t anticipated to fill your cup so full. Long and intense kisses where his hands dragged down your body and he sighed into your cheeks. You were often pulled into his side and under his arm when sharing the sofa. Soft pets to your hair as you fell asleep. 

And when you felt the need, and if he wasn’t feeling up to it, he’d lie beside you and whisper into your ear. Talking soft and low about all the ways you stole his heart and mind while his hand pumped those long fingers in and out of your own needy pussy. He’d grin into the nape of your neck when you were incapable of keeping your voice down any longer. A feeling you’d come to need. 

You didn’t need a cock to be full. And by the look of Val’s twitching monster, you’d be broken before he bottomed out.

His thumbs pulled apart your bottom lips, “Ready to spread you open so wide you won’t even feel that lanky fuck in you.” 

His third and fourth hands pushed your thighs open and back, hands you could swear felt familiar. Alastor? Or before him?

You struggled to regain focus, your fingers feeling at your bra.

Two minutes.

Legs suddenly too weak to resist, or perhaps Val too strong. Or, a third option, you weren’t trying so hard. Behind his fingers was left a burn on your skin.

“Closer.” Your lips were tingling, it felt good.

“I need you closer.”

His wide chest grew prideful, “Oh? If you’re looking for love you’re in the wrong bed, princesa.”

“No love. Chest. I can’t reach your chest.” You struggled to sit up, but managed to grab the chain connecting his pierced nipples before falling back into the bed.

A screech, a squeak, “Fuck! Watch how you handle that.” His voice rose several octaves. God, you hated him. 

You gripped the chain tightly, the feeling keeping you a little grounded. “Oops.” A whirlpool was behind your eyes, all five senses mingling and amplifying. This was dangerous. He hadn’t used this aphrodisiac on you before…maybe he had liked how much you thrashed when he tied you up and mocked you.  

His length ran up your core and you jumped. He was so hot. So…. Firm.

No. Too close.

One minute.

You had told Alastor you wouldn’t let it go too far. He said he’d not stop you, because you had said you needed to do it. But you could see the conflict behind his own gaze. What would he do if you returned smelling of Val? Dripping of him? 

Almost. Just a few more seconds. His body rolled into you, rocking you with the motion. Every passing had his cock from slit to balls sliding between your wildly wet folds. 

Timing was key for your safety. Though Alastor had made it clear you could always just bail and wait for his call.

The more Val rubbed and pressed against you you felt your mind melt a little more. Surely it would slip down your spine at this rate. 

A brief worry in the pleasurable fog, what if later on you remembered the pleasure and felt guilty? Guilty to Alastor but most importantly to yourself, for gasping and sighing under the abusive trash that dragged you to hell to begin with.

And what if you didn’t? 

Which was worse?

Which would be easier to live with?

He prodded your inner thigh. He was getting closer and closer to actually entering you.

30 seconds.

“Do you remember my promise?”

“What the fuck are you talking about?” His head was hung as he stared between your bodies. He didn’t see you reach between your breasts into your bra and pull out the Carmine angelic dagger Husk had recommended to Alastor. You hadn’t been quiet about your plans.

“Odd, it’s on recording. Maybe you didn’t realize I was talking to you.” As you moved the dagger from your right side to bury it into Valentino’s chest you remembered the man in the woods. The young man at work. Angel. Here you were again. But if this ended the same as the woods, where would you go? Would Alastor be able to reach you?

“My promise to fucking kill you.”

Valentino keeled back, hand raised to slash your throat out when a green light momentarily blinded him. The sound of chains filled the room as you disappeared into nothingness underneath him. He was left slashing at his own duvet while he tried to slow the bleeding.

Alastor caught you as you fell from the portal he summoned you with. Two feet barely touching the floor as he set you in the reading chair in front of his fireplace.

He nodded at the drops of blood staining your cornflower yellow dress, “Was it a success?”

Your body slipped down the chair, dress getting caught in the friction and riding up. He leaned over and tugged it back down to hide your exposed sex.  You were too far gone to feel deja vu.

“No, I think he’s alive. He drugged me with that smoke.” Your legs were spread wide, trying to keep your weight from slipping off the chair. “I was too weak.”

Alastor sat in the chair opposite and took in the scene. Hair messy, legs open, face flush. Bloodied and breathless.

Pride ran a shiver up his spine. His doe’s second murder attempt. While he has despised the idea he couldn’t pretend he didn’t love the initiative. 

“Hey, I know you said you wouldn’t ask.” You crossed your legs at the ankle, which did nothing to stop the way the air that was rising up your dress and cooling your core. “But I didn’t fuck him.”

Alastor shrugged, “As they say, all is fair in love and war. I would understand if you did for the sake of killing him. What’s a little sex if it helps murder?”

Your hand slipped down your chest, a ghostly trail in its wake like your touch had an echo. “What a terrible way to confess you love me.”

A choked cough from the radio demon.

Your eyes slipped close. Relaxed. “I feel good.”

He hummed.

“Not from the stabbing, from the stuff in his smoke. My body is thrumming. Is my heart pounding?” You tried to stand but ended up on your knees, cheek coming to rest on his inner leg. As he leaned forward to let his hand enter your dress and rest above your heart, his face got close to yours.

“It’s frantic.” A low whisper into the shell of your ear. Pulling back he paused at your face to lick an errant drop of blood. “You reek of him.”

“He did lick me a couple times.” You watched Alastor sneer, “And he was naked, like, immediately. Oh! Oh fuck,” your head popped up with a renewed clarity, “He recorded it.”

Alastor stilled, he wasn’t thinking about the recording aspect. He was thinking on your heart, on how flushed your skin was, the sweat dripping down your neck. On the thought of Val’s tongue over your skin. “The medicine— or drug you were exposed to,” a deep breath in, “What does it feel like?”

A topic change you hadn’t expected, your body slouched into his leg, arm over his thigh for support. His eyes on your face as they always were when you were in the room. 

“Like my body is… illuminescent. Every time my clothes or something touches me, my skin lights up and my brain gets so quiet.” His palm stayed on your heart. 

“Hmm,” His hands slipped under your arm, lifting you up. Your feet were entirely off the ground now as he carried you like a dirty cat on its way to the bath. Gently, you were set onto the bed. A lovely juxtaposition.

“Every time I touch where he did, tell me.” Alastor kneeled beside you, deft fingers unbuttoning your dress. A sharp claw popped under the center of your bra and sliced through the fabric.

Your body was humming again, Val’s powerful aphrodisiac lifting up from your senses like dust under heavy footsteps. 

Goosebumps formed up your arms as the back of his fingers traced along the outside of your forearm. As he curved up your shoulder and reached your neck you breathed out a low, “There.”

You watched him lean down, warm lips kissing at your skin. A series of kisses as soft and needy as the ones he often placed on your own mouth. A shudder turned nearly violent as his hot tongue ran up your neck to your jaw.

His nose slid up your cheek, “There.” Kisses to your face, across your nose and to the other side.

He pulled back, eyes lusty and heavy lidded. He didn’t say anything, but his grim smile asked you something. You nodded, running your hands down your chest and to your thighs.

A growl you hadn’t heard in so long rumbled in his chest. He rolled you onto your stomach and pulled the dress off entirely, nails raking along your spine until they dimpled the soft fat of your ass.

“There.”

Alastor straddled you at the back of your knees. You wanted to squirm but your muscles had gone weak again. He nipped at the mounds of flesh, massaging and squeezing after every particularly sharp bite. What little part of your brain could form coherent thoughts was trying to piece together an alarm— his face was so close to your still soaking wet entrance. 

Images bubbled up where words were failing. Val’s large cock head smearing precum up your slit.

His hands roamed down your legs and feet before turning you back to face him. When you could finally see his expression again, you were surprised to see a look he hadn’t given in so long.

Needy. Desperation screamed through knitted brows, hazy eyes, and a weak smile threatening to fall flat.

As his hands slid down your stomach and reached the junction of your thighs, you started to register the little moans you were making.

But it was getting harder to hear past the radio static and pounding heartbeat in your ears.

Soft fingers traveled between your closed thighs, you hesitated before offering what you thought was a quiet, “There.”

You couldn’t hear yourself think let alone speak as the sounds both in and outside your body grew louder with every signal he’d found a new spot to cover up.

His knees pushed open your left thigh, then your right. Lowering himself, he hitched your knees and lied flat on his stomach. A bite to your inner thigh, nearly the back. A suck, sharp and strong, that ended with a pop as he released.

Nose inching closer and closer to your core, Alastor could see your hole clenching. A dribble of the evidence of your arousal being forced out and down the cleft of your ass.

You heard and felt his breathing quicken, when a finger slid down your folds you couldn’t stop the raise of your hips.

“There.”

The lights went out with a pop. Shaky breaths as his tongue swiped from entrance to clit. Lick after lick to your center like he was trying to make you clean again. Another moan you were only sure was yours cut through the now biting static that filled the air around you.

Your mind tried to piece together a sentence, “Crazy stuff… it had me so horny”, your hands ran up your chest without thinking, “I was almost hoping Val would put it in before time was gone.”

The static cut. Not even the sound of the fireplace or the crickets in the swamp portaled into his room were present anymore. 

“Isn’t that insane? Have you ever heard of such a drug?” Your eyes had closed, feeling his breath wafting down your saliva coated lips. “Alastor?”

He was being honest when he said he’d not hold it against you. But he hadn’t even considered a situation where you wanted more to happen. Than had been discussed. The very idea of Valentino mixing with you brought bile to his throat.

The drug was to blame and he could understand that, as a man. But as an overlord, as something more akin to animal in some aspects, he had the clawing urge to reclaim you. To write over even the thought of wanting to feel Valentino.

“My darling little doe, I think you need a reminder of just how much of you I possess. And the parts of me you own in turn.” 

You looked down to see glowing eyes from between your legs, his fingers snapped and while you couldn’t see what was happening past the light of his eyes, you could hear the VHS player click and then a small, “Aunt Sara….” whispered in a familiar voice.  

“I don’t understand what’s happened….”

It took a moment to register it was your own voice you were hearing from the darkness. 

“Aunt Sara isn’t here.” 

Alastor’s acting debut crowing from the old TV beside his bayou door. His eyes shifted with a blink from glowing red to black, just sharp dials visible in the shadow of his face.

“She’s made an exchange, she gets extraordinary power….and I get your soul.”

The prongs of a buck ready to clash over his territory creaked past your open thighs.

“But I want more than that. I need more than that.”

˖ ݁𖥔.Summoning the Horny Little Deer Cult.𖥔 ݁ ˖

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[areislol]

“You really took care of us huh?”

►— pairings. genshin men x gn! creator! reader

►— warnings. nothing that i know of?

►— synopsis. albedo created a machine where it would bring back their creator, who was stuck in another world, back to where they belong. but instead of bringing you here to them, it brought them to where you were.

►— a/n. OMG IM SO SORRY FOR PUTTING THIS OUT LATER THAN EXPECTED 😭 instead of writing i was playing a game so that’s on me, i was also unbelievably tired this week, my fault! but it’s out now 🫶🏻

►— wordcount. 4.1k

✧ part one | ✧ part two | ✧ part three | ✧ part four | ✧ part five | more tba.. NAVIGATION

recommended to listen to: wave to earth - seasons or only - leehi

You never expected, not even in a million years or like.. in a lifetime for the video game characters coming alive and appearing in your room.

And they were handsome too, like, drop-dead gorgeous and the fact that they all respect and love you… You were surely the luckiest person alive right now.

These men also made your bank account cry, the amount of money you had spent on them—pulling for them (and losing many 50/50’s) and their weapon, grinding for hours trying to get their materials to ascend them and for their weapons, artifacts (you’d rather not talk about it) skills and EVERYTHING.

You put more work into making sure they’re all fully taken care of and put to the best of their ability than compared to your work. It was a bit concerning yes but, this game—the characters, we’re so comforting to you than anything else. So of course you poured your whole soul into the game and their characters.

(Also the fact that you also read fanfics about them and now they’re suddenly in your room does not help with your infatuation with them)

And so this brings you to where you were now, showing off their showcase at 10 in the morning.

“Oh wow Y/n! You worked really hard to make us strong.. no wonder why I felt so strong all of the sudden in one day..”

Aether watched in awe and amazement as you showed him his artifacts and his weapons with Venti, Pierro, Diluc, Kaeya, Tighnari and a few others hovering and peeking out from behind your chair, watching as you showed Aether’s build to everybody.

The rest were in your living room, eating breakfast. You had decided to eat breakfast after showing the people who wanted to know their builds.

For some reason their characters were still in the game despite really being in your world. You would have to ask Albedo about this later.

“What about me?” Diluc grumbled, trying his best to ignore the states he got. “What? I can’t ask Y/n something so simple?” Everybody shook their heads “no”.

Smiling, you replied. “Of course! I remember when your skin first came out I was all over it, I made sure to buy it to, did you like it? I think it looked beautiful on you.”

Diluc blushed at your words and nodded his head. “Mhm. I loved it, Y/n, thank you.” He stated, smiling warmly down at you.

You began to stroll through your characters until you found Diluc. “There you are—look at you! So handsome..” you sighed dreamily before snapping out of your trance and cleared your throat and began to go through his build.

Once you had finished showing Diluc and everybody his showcase, more people wanted to know about theirs and obviously you couldn’t say no so that’s how you ended up showing nearly everybody’s build and showcasing their skills and whatnot.

“And yeah! I did spend a lot of money but it was.. I guess worth it? I mean I’m glad you guys felt strong and all!”

Tighnari sighed and rested his hand on your desk. “We are all thankful, but seriously you didn’t have to spend all of the days you worked so hard for..” he explained, Diluc agreed with him.

The rest, too, didn’t want you to waste your hard work but then again for you to work so hard on and take care of them ignited something inside of them, so they couldn’t complain.

Before you could respond, a knock was heard. “Come in!” You shouted, turning around in your chair to see who it was.

Lyney entered the room and smiled at you (ignoring the others) “are you done? Your breakfast may get cold you know..” his gaze wanders off to the guys beside you. “Oh, and yours too.”

You could hear the scoffs coming from Diluc and Pierro. “Yeah I’m pretty hungry right now, and was it (Vietnamese) broken rice I smelt?” You asked, getting up from your seat and walking towards Lyney. He nods his head.

“Yeah, Aether found the recipe in a book and found the ingredients for it, lucky huh?”

As you smiled at him and began to walk out of your room followed by the others as Lyney cocks his head to the side—ordering them to get a move on and out of your room. “Come on, I bet you all are starving right now!”

Making your way to living room, you found everybody already done with their breakfast, with only a few plates placed on the coffee table for you and the others.

“Ouuuuh it looks absolutely delicious? Who cooked it?” You asked, sitting down on a pillow beside Xiao and Wriothesley.

“Thoma did with the help of Neuvillette and Childe, surprisingly.” Cyno responded, eyeing Childe from the corner of his eyes.

“Hey… what’s that supposed to mean?!” Childe yelled, pouting at Cyno before looking at you, betrayed and defeated.

You shrug your shoulders and began to dig in your food with Diluc, Venti, Pierro and Tighnari mirroring your actions, sitting down and eating their breakfast.

Childe began to make his way towards you and pushed the other men away that were behind you, this obviously annoyed them but before they could yell at him (start world war 3*) he had wrapped his arms around your waist and buried his face in your neck.

“You don’t think I poisoned your food, do you?” He mumbled, even though you couldn’t see his face you knew he was pouting.

You shake your head no, not even reacting to his affection—you were somewhat used to it. “‘Course not, I don’t think you could ever actually.”

Childe smiled on your skin and tightened his grip on you. “Mhm. Thanks snookums.”

Everybody cringed (some nearly gagged) at the corny pet name. “Snookums, really? Out of all the petnames.. and it’s not the first time he called them that.” Kaveh whispered to Al-haitham who was obviously disgusted by the pet name.

“Mhm, it truly is disgusting..” Al-haitham whispered back, looking away from the ginger.

Childe rolled his eyes at their reactions and continued to hold you in his arms, Xiao holding back his urge to tackle him right there and then but you were in his arms so he couldn’t, because if he did you would get harmed and he would rather die than hurt you.

While you were eating your breakfast, you grabbed the remote and began to go through the channels—animal documentary, no.. news, yes. Setting down the remote on the table you listened closely to the news.

You weren’t the type to listen to the news but today was an exception, because you just felt like it. “What’s that?” Ayato asked, eyes ogling at the news reporter in the middle addressing the weather.

“Oh-“ “how does she know the weather so precisely?”

“Because, she is a news reporter, she reports on the weather and gives us all of the latest news about whatever.”

The sounds of them “oooh”ing and “aah”ing could be heard from all around you. With Al-haitham and Dainsleif just giving a small “mhm.”

You spend the next few minutes just eating breakfast and watching them all eye the TV and listen closely to the woman. This was.. interesting to them, they had never experienced this before.

Finally you were done eating breakfast, you were the last one to finish so as you began to wash your dish, you looked back and found Neuvillette behind you.

“Oh- god!” Your body jolted as your heart rate spiked up. “You scared me!” You said, sort of breathless.

Neuvillette sends you an apologetic look and apologies. “I’m so sorry for scaring you like that.. I apologize. I should’ve told you beforehand..” his brows furrowed, he looked extremely guilty it was eating your heart away. You couldn’t just not forgive him!

“It’s really okay Neuvillette! I just got a little scare was all..” you laughed at his scared face and turned back around to wash your dish. “What did you want?”

There was silence at first, Neuvillette didn’t respond, there seemed to be a nervous and awkward tension between you two.

“Neuvillette..? Did you want something?” You repeated, placing your dish in the dish rack before washing the other utensils, still awaiting his response.

“I-..” Neuvillette pauses, cheeks slightly tinted with red. “I uhm. I wanted to..” all of the sudden Neuvillette suddenly pulls you in a hug from behind, his arms awkwardly wrapped around your waist.

You were caught off guard by his action but you already knew all of them were touch-deprived and or just wanted to be next to you all the time.

“What’s the matter?” You asked, letting him embrace you in his warm arms from behind. “When I saw Childe hugging you I just.. felt something weird. I wanted to, lord forbid, push him and take his place.”

His words caught you off guard causing you to laugh abruptly and drop the utensils in the sink, a loud "CLUNK!" could be heard. "Oh whoops.. any who uh- Neuvillette are you.." you turn around and raise your brow, smirking up at him.

"Am I what?"

"Are you jealous~" your teasing voice made his heart skip a beat, his eyes focused on you, brows furrowing. "Me? Jealous? I don't know what you mean." Neuvillette sighed, his grip on your waist tightened.

You eyed him and slowly nodded your head. "Mhm.. sure.." Neuvillette peeks his head to the side and spots the utensils still unwashed. "Would you like me to clean the rest? You could go rest and bond with the rest."

Turning your head back around to look at the utensils that laid in the sink. You hummed for a few seconds before responding—"why don't we both clean them? You wanted to be with me right?"

Neuvillette nods his head, offering you a smile. You two began to wash the dishes together with Neuvillette standing beside you, after a few minutes all the dishes were on the dish rack, water dripping off down into the sink.

"All done! Now let's go join the others" you excitedly hummed, grabbing a hold of Neuvillette's arm and walking over to where the rest were.

Kazuha smiled and waved his hand at the both of you, once spotting you with Neuvillette. "You're back! What do you want to do now?"

You sit down on the end of the couch and sighed. "I'm not sure.. I do need to clean my house though, its been a while since I last cleaned it." ever since the men appeared in your room your house has.. sort of been trashed.

Not entirely trashed (Thoma, Kazuha, Diluc, Tighnari and Al-haitham kept the house clean) but still, you really needed to do a deep clean—ever since you've bought a house it really has been a hassle to keep everything in place as you were still in college and had to multi-task.

The mention of cleaning your house definenetly perked some heads up. "Cleaning? I can help!" Thoma offers, eyes shining with excitement (yes he loves cleaning and cooking and everything domestic, he IS the male wife).

"Me too!" "me three, I can help as well!" others chimed in as well, Childe stood up and raised his hand. "I will be the biggest help, don't worry Y/n! What's the biggest job I can do?"

Everybody groaned at the ginger's words and shook their heads in disappointment. Giving his words a thought, you hummed and put on your thinking face.

"Hm.. well I would say cleaning every single crevice you know.. the nook and crannies." you replied, smiling at Childe. He immediately grabbed a duster and set off to clean single crevice.

"I'll wipe the surfaces and all." Al-haitham states, getting up and grabbing some wipes before doing his thing.

"I'll organize your clothes Y/n! Oh and ours too"

"I'll go mop the floors."

Soon, you pretty much gave everybody a role to do (or they just gave themselves the role) and they all set off to do their jobs. Honestly, this had to be one of the best days ever—your house was going to be squeaky clean and plus you get to see them doing domestic chores.

"If you guys need any help just ask me okay?" you mentioned, dusting the books on a shelf. A collective "yes ma'am!" could be heard. They were so respectful it made you fold.

After what felt like hours of cleaning (it was, approximately 4 hours of cleaning) you flopped down on the couch along with a few others and heaved a great sight.

"Good job everybody!! the house looks so much cleaner now..." you sighed, chest heaving up and down. You were all tired, apart from Thoma, Tighnari, Al-haitham and Albedo, they still had energy left.

As you got up from the couch to fetch a glass of cold water, you got a fright from seeing Gorou sitting at your feet, looking up at you with puppy-dog eyes.

"Gorou? What's wrong?" you asked, your heart melting at the sight of his ears pressing flat against his head. Gorou stared up at you—his eyes glistening.

He inches closer to you, his arms wrapping around your legs. "What. Is. He. Doing." Childe whispered to Pantalone, eyeing Gorou with... some disgust. Pantalone shrugs. "Lord knows what."

"Uhm, If I may ask Y/n.. Do you think I did a good job today? For uh.. cleaning the house."

Your brows furrowed in confusion as he asked the question. What does that even have to do with anything.. "Yes, you have, why?" you questioned, watching Gorou lower his gaze to the floor.

Everybody watches as the scene unfolds, they were confused, scared, worried, but more so confused.

"Could I get a head-pat?" Gorou asked quietly, his eyes still focused on the floor, his head lowered as if to invite you to pat your head. Was he asking for a head-pat (some kind of reward) for his hard work?

Nodding your head, you began to pat his head softly, enjoying how soft his hair was, your hands would occasionally caress his ears and my god were they super soft!! Heat rushed to Gorou's cheeks as he realized you had no intention of stopping. Not that he was complaining.

"Gorou.. did you know your hair is very soft? Like, unbelievably soft! I could touch it all day if I could.." you exclaimed, if Gorou allowed you, you would definenetly be running your fingers through his hair furiously because it was just way too soft.

You wondered if the other's hair were soft too, I mean, all of theirs's looks soft, Neuvillette and Ayato's looked soft and silky. You should go look for an excuse to touch their hair soon..

As everybody watched Gorou enjoy his head-pats, they all eyed him with jealousy (if you look closely you can clearly see fume coming out of their ears right now), wishing that they were in his position—receiving head-pats from you, what a dream. And they were sure to make it come true.

"Ahem, dearest Y/n, don't you think that I too, did a fantastic job in scrubbing the shower too?" Kaeya sighs dramatically, sliding down and sitting next to you, batting his pretty eyelashes at you.

You turned to face him, pursuing your lips. "Well.. I mean.. yeeeessss..?"

It was a bit confusing after that, Kaeya asked for you to pat his head as well, saying that he "deserved it" (which he did) but then after that the others started to ask for some head-pats too. So in the end you had to give everybody a head-pat, it was very time consuming.

Soon, it was 1 pm—it was time for lunch. Time has gone by so fast with them, you (unfortunately) stop petting Al-haitham's hair and stand up from the couch.

"I'll go make some lunch now okay? Something simple like maybe a sandwich or something, is anyone hungry?"

While a few replied with "I'm hungry" some replied saying that they weren't hungry and would eat a snack of some sort. You began to grab out the ingredients to make a simple grilled cheese sandwich.

You made sure that the men weren't allergic to anything beforehand, you would definenetly not be having beans around Itto at all, while you were busy making everybody sandwiches, Zhongli sat on the chair behind the kitchen counter, watching your every move.

It was sort of uncomfortable, yes, but you didn't really mind at all. You were used to their curious stares after all.

"Zhongli, would you like to be the first one to try it out? I want to see if I need to add anything or fix anything up."

This wasn't your first time making sandwiches but still, you were positive they weren't used to your (earth) sandwiches so why not make Zhongli your taste-tester?

Zhongli nods his head, giving you a warm smile in the process and god was he so handsome. "Of course, It would be an honor to be the first to taste your sandwich." and with that you placed the plate – with the grilled cheese sandwich on it – on the counter, waiting for Zhongli to take his first bite and his opinions on it.

As Zhongli grabs the sandwich and takes the first bite, munching on it. You weren't nervous at all, watching him eat your sandwich. Okay that was a lie you were totally nervous. I mean making a grilled cheese sandwich? Nothing big! But the fact that Zhongli, a handsome, fine, fancy man is sitting right across from you and eating your sandwich is!!!

Studying his face got you nowhere. His face was as always, nonchalant and somewhat still, after swallowing, he looked up and set his gaze on your face.

"It's... amazing! I've never had anything like this before, a simple grilled cheese sandwich I've had but to have it made from you and in your household, in your world, makes it all the better. The taste is also immaculate, truly other worldly. Quite literally."

You crack a smile at his joke at the end and breathed a sigh of relief. "Oh thank god.. so it's okay, thanks Zhongli!" you thanked him before going back to making some more before finally setting them all down on the kitchen table, counter, and coffee tables (and some other places as well since those all of them can't fit in three spots).

Tighnari had noticed that you had a couple of plants in your home, they were.. not in the best condition, he had to say. But that was no problem! He could help you raise and take care of them.

"Say, Y/n. Please do not take any offense to this whatsoever but do you take care of your plants?"

The question was out of the blue, yes, and it did catch you off-guard for sure. "Oh- uh, my plants? Well the truth is I haven't really been taking care of them.. I mean I would love to but I'm very forgetful." You explained while smiling sheepishly, it was embarrassing after all.

Tighnari nods at your response and offers you help to which you obviously agree to! I mean who wouldn't? He would take care and nurture your dying plants? Deal!

Everybody began to eat lunch as for the ones who weren't hungry just lounged in your room, Al-haitham read a historical book that you haven't even finished reading (you only bought it because of you thought the cover was really vintage), Pierro stood in front of your window, staring out to the view of the skyscrapers and buildings. Albedo and Cyno were sitting on your bed in silence, waiting for you to finish eating and come back.

"What a total weirdo.." Cyno whispers to Albedo, eyeing the tall, old (and stinky, that's what they call him) fatui. Albedo simply glances at Pierro and looks back at Cyno, confused. "How so? I think it's totally normal to gaze out of the window, don't you think? I mean, the view is absolutely fantastic out there.. so many things we've never seen and don't you agree that the flowers that bloom down near the window looks absolutely-"

Cyno groaned as Albedo ranted on and on, what Albedo was trying to say was basically, staring out the window was "normal". But of course, he couldn't be rude about it so he had to painfully listen to Albedo spitting out nonsense.

Finally, you (along with others) finished your food and washed your dish before walking into your room, leaving everybody else who was still not done (Heizou, Kaveh and surprisingly, Tighnari, are slow eaters).

"You're done eating? What do you want to do now?" Pierro asked, his voice rumbling deeply that it gave Cyno a spook, it gave him the hibbie jibbies. Humming, you thought about your answer but concluded that you wanted to do nothing but sleep.

"Eh, not really. I do want to get a nap in though, I'm sort of tired." You yawned, flopping down onto your bed between Cyno and Albedo. "Would you want us to leave and let you sleep in peace or..?" Pierro asked once again, his face scanning yours.

You shake your head, covering your body in your sheets and curling into a ball. "I'm okay with you guys here don't worry. Pierro could you close the blinds please?"

Pierro nods and closes the blinds at your command, the room now dimly lit. Soon your heavy eyelids take over, but not before the sound of the door clicking open and then followed by Childe complaining about you leaving him.

The obvious sounds of groaning and complaints about Childe could be heard too (Itto was complaining REALLY loudly.), Cyno shushes everybody entering your room, pointing at your trying-to-fall-asleep figure.

"Ooooh, whoops! Sorry Y/n!" Childe apologizes, cringing at the thought of his loud voice waking you up. You could barely hear him though, drowsiness taking over your body and thoughts, nothing was left in your brain except for one thing—sleep.

Kaeya rolls his eyes at Childe before slowing and carefully closing the door shut. "It's only 2:30 pm, isn't sleeping in the afternoon bad or something?" Gorou asked, peeking his head from behind Itto to look at you.

Albedo hums. "Well, yes, but considering that they have been tiring themselves out since we've arrived, I think they deserve this well-deserved rest. Don't you agree?"

The surrounding men agreed, nodding their heads. "I agree, we should let Y/n sleep, I think I should too, without Y/n I'll be bored..." Kazuha yawns, already getting ready to take an afternoon nap with you.

After Kazuha laid down on the mattress, a few others started to mirror his actions. Itto, Ayato, Capitano, Thoma and Kaveh began to settle down on the mattresses while the others went to the other room to take a nap as well (some didn't want to so they stayed out of the rooms and watched the TV or played board games).

Normally when you sleep during the afternoon, you would wake up in the middle of the night, and oftentimes you fail to fall back asleep. And that is exactly what happened to you.

In the dimly lit room, darkness envelops every corner. The only source of light is the faint glow seeping through the curtains, painting the room in a hazy ambiance. You lie on your bed peacefully, your chest rising and falling rhythmically with each gentle breath you take in your sleep, the softness of the pillows cradling your head.

The darkness of the room seems to cocoon you and everybody, it is as if the night itself has woven a protective blanket around you all, the silence is broken only by the distant hum of the city, a lullaby that lulls you deeper into your peaceful slumber.

But soon, your eyelids flutter gently, and in the dark room, you can hazily make out the scene before you. Outside, the moon casted its soft glow through the window, casting delicate patterns on the bodies of the men and on the wall. It illuminates your face.

It was so comforting to you, the soft glow of the moonlight completing everything.

As you take in your surroundings you begin to understand that you were cuddling Kazuha while Ayato had his arms wrapped around you. Smiling softly, you snuggled in closer to Kazuha's chest—pressing your cheek against his warm and slowly rising chest.

And in this dimly lit room, you slumber on, oblivious to the world outside. The darkness embraced you like a mother's embrace, offering comfort, it is a place where dreams are born and nurtured, where the imagination takes flight and as the night deepens and silence engulfs the room, you continued to sleep peacefully, unaware of the outside world.

But then before you could fall asleep your eyes shot open, I have to work tomorrow. Groaning, you nuzzled your face more into Kazuha's chest, knowing the next day would be tiring.

note: IM SO SORRY FOR PROCRASTINATINGGGG i just got home a couple days ago and my jet lag is pretty bad and i have to work and all of that jazz!! thankfully i got myself together and finished it :)

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[jeongheart]

super shy

summary: he's been receiving these letters for the past year but, he doesn't know your name, does he?

w.c: 7.1k.

tags: friends to lovers, fluff, slice of life.

a.n: this is the longest fic i ever written omg, i've been playing new jeans latest comeback for a few days and this is the result lol. as always, english is not my first language so sorry in advance for any mistakes. leave your thoughts if you liked it, means a lot!

It was there again.

Sitting immaculately on top of his messy folders, the envelope was white without any type of decoration, the owner of the cursive handwriting wouldn't even risk placing a sticker since it could give a clue, even minimal, about who was behind it.

The classroom was almost empty, since recess ended a few minutes ago and the students were still lazily getting up from the grass where they were lying, not wanting to lock themselves in a room again for hours while the day was shining beautifully outside the building.

However, Chan looked around him, narrowing his eyes as he scanned his classmates for the smallest trace of uneasiness as he took the envelope in his hands. But he didn't find any, unless the author had a master's degree in poker face no one around him seemed interested in what he was doing.

After the failed scrutiny, he sat down again with no care on the wooden bench, eager to read what that person had to say today. This excited feeling was new for him, the letters had been arriving about a year ago, right at the beginning of the new semester and at first, Chan found it funny. Surely one of his friends (he bet his life on either Seungmin or Minho, those two were always up to something no matter how much they said they weren't) found it fun to piss him off this year, after all, it has been a long time since his last relationship and sometimes he felt the need of affection, so the "joke" made perfect sense in his head.

He didn't read them the first few months, he just crumpled them up and kept them in a hidden place in his backpack, to let whoever was behind them know that he wasn't interested. But they kept coming even after that vile act against someone's real feelings; and that was when Chan began to question if there really was a person genuinely interested in him, interested enough to send him handwritten letters as if they were living in a classic romance novel. The person had a beautiful vocabulary, and it was clear that they paid attention to details that he didn't even noticed about himself.

The notes weren't very long since they didn't exceed ten lines, but each word was full of admiration and affection. They always reminded him to eat and take care of his health, in addition to telling him day by day one of the qualities why his mysterious person had fallen in love with him. Chan blushed every time he read those reasons, it was no secret (to himself, since he didn't like others to know) that he didn't think very highly of himself; from his point of view there was nothing nice or admirable about his existence. But this person believed just the opposite, and they had made their life's mission to let him know that every day.

Today was no exception, the lined sheets were a pastel color (pink? orange?) and had small animal decorations at the bottom and top (he noticed that these came in "groups", the representative animal of these last ten notes was a smiling giraffe). It was incredibly adorable, and Chan found himself laughing softly every time he took out the contents of the envelope.

'Mondays are always hard! Especially this time of year (can't the professors trust in me and my knowledge of things? I don't see the need for them to take a test).

Anyway, Channie, this weekend I found myself thinking a lot about you, every time I start writing my reasons I feel like I'm going to be left speechless but then I remember that it's not difficult at all to love you. So here is another one:

Your resilience, I greatly admire your ability to always get up no matter how many blows life throws at you. The vast majority of us feel discouraged by the slightest inconvenience, but not you. And that is something incredible.

I hope you have a beautiful start to the week, remember to eat your meals and feel the sun.

Fondly,'

And that's how all the letters ended, the author seemed to hesitate every time they traced the last line, he could feel the uncertainty even on the paper. Chan knew that they were shy and always wondered when they were going to stop being to finally sign with their name and be able to meet that person who stole his heart with every word.

⋆｡ﾟ☁︎｡⋆｡

He was reading the note, hunched over his things, almost shielding the contents of the paper from the prying eyes of anyone who passed by him. You knew he was going to do it (he always did) but you couldn't stop your heart from racing like it was the first time it happened. You watched him from the hallway, hiding behind one of your textbooks while a silly smile appeared on your face, nothing made you happier than making him happy with your words, it's true what people say about "butterflies in the stomach" because that was what you were feeling right now.

His eyes crinkled in the most adorable way possible every time he smiled and from your spot in the hallway you could almost hear the sigh he let out after finishing reading the letter. After scanning his surroundings one last time, Chan placed the paper back into the envelope, and carefully placed it inside his notebook.

"You and your Shakespeare complex again" The sudden voice of your best friend so close made you jump in your place and drop the book you had in your hands. It hit the ground with a dull sound due to the thickness of its contents, and when you picked up the book again you turned around to face the figure of the perpetrator. He just laughed at you and your reaction, which earned him a closed-fist blow directly to his shoulder.

"You deserve it" You didn't even bother to return his reproachful gaze since he clearly felt like fighting, and instead, you returned your focus to Chan's classroom and his figure. He was no longer in his seat and you didn't want to look weird by leaning out the window door to look for him. So you sighed heavily and leaned your body against the wall while closing your eyes.

Until you felt Jeongin's presence come to your side "Are you going to tell him sometime?"

You didn't answer him.

Well, actually you did, with a growl that could mean either 'I'll do it today, stop bothering' or 'not even dead'. However, the blonde wasn't satisfied with your interpretation of an animal as a response and he began poking your ribs with his long fingers, drawing high-pitched sounds of protest from your lips.

"Stop it, Innie" You moved his hands away from your figure and stood firmly looking him in the eyes like a mother who is trying to discipline her misbehaving son. He crossed his arms with a satisfied smile crossing his face with foxlike features and, with a movement of his head, he invited you to speak.

"What do you want me to say? 'Hello Chan! It's me, the person who has been sending you letters like a fifteen-year-old for a year now. I've been in love with you since the moment I saw you at my best friend's house. Do you want to be my boyfriend?" You rolled your eyes tiredly and didn't wait for Jeongin to tell you what he thought, and so you started walking towards your classroom, with an exasperated five foot seven boy following closely behind you.

⋆｡ﾟ☁︎｡⋆｡

You still remembered the first time you'd seen him, and how couldn't you. His presence could illuminate even the darkest corner, and his personality attracted anyone around him.

It was the summer, and you'd gone to Jeongin's house to spend an afternoon together. The air conditioning in your apartment had broken two days ago, and you couldn't stand being in your room for another second, which was already beginning to feel like an industrial oven. When you arrived at your best friend's residence, you weren't surprised by the fact that there were more people than just the two of you. Jeongin was taking singing lessons at a nearby academy and had hit it off with some of his classmates; so while you didn't know them as well as he did, you had the chance to hang out with some of them a couple of times and you could say that they were the funniest guys you'd ever come across. Especially Hyunjin, who seemed to be like a glove with your best friend.

Jeongin's house felt cold, as if winter had come only for the Yang family and, although you shivered with every step you took towards the kitchen where voices could be heard, this felt like paradise compared to the hell you lived in your house (and you even thought it was cooler in hell).

Reaching the kitchen, you heard Hyunjin's melodious voice followed by his nasal, boisterous laughter at a comment Jeongin made. You shook your head laughing inwardly as you pushed the wooden door open to enter the space, the boys turning their heads in your direction as they heard the hinges snapping back into place.

Your best friend gave you his characteristic smile as he got up from his seat on one of the stools in front of the kitchen island to give you a small hug "I thought you weren't coming anymore!"

From Jeongin's shoulder you saw how Hyunjin gave you a smile and a wave, you tried to return the gesture as best you could considering that you were trapped in the arms of a boy who flatly stated that he didn't like hugs. It was getting long in your opinion, so you patted Jeongin on the back, letting him know that yes, you loved him very much, but you were still sticky with sweat from the walk in the sun and you didn't want to make him uncomfortable when he was so cool. When Jeongin let go of you, he opened his palm to introduce you to a person you hadn't seen before, "I hope you don't mind, that's Chan over there. He also goes to our academy, and he goes to university with us! Although he is a year ahead"

You smiled at Jeongin as you walked further into the kitchen to greet the new guest and in front of you stood one of the most attractive men you'd ever seen in your entire life. He wasn't very tall (you could tell even if he was sitting) but his broad shoulders gave him an intimidating presence, his hair looked messy in a swirl of brown curls, and although he was dressed from head to toe in black (you were sure his nails were painted that color too) on his face was a dimpled smile that took your breath away.

From one moment to the next you forgot how to articulate words and you felt like a fish opening and closing its mouth trying to find something to say, but your brain didn't seem to want to work.

You felt a small push on your right shoulder that took your body forward, towards the table, and towards Chan.

"How rude you are" Jeongin rolled his eyes, and although deep down you knew he was doing it to tease you, your cheeks turned red. You felt your tongue heavy in your mouth as the seconds passed and you were unable to utter a single word.

"Leave her alone, Innie. It's pretty hot outside, isn't it?" Chan's deep voice brought you out of your trance and forced you to look him in the eyes. He had a sincere smile on his face and was watching you with raised eyebrows, letting you know that he was going to listen to you when you wanted to respond.

Your heart did a complete turn in your chest, you were surprised in the best of ways at how friendly he was, the vast majority of boys with his attractiveness made that their only personality trait but he was attentive and considerate of all the people around him, even with complete strangers who hadn't stopped looking or saying anything to him in three minutes.

"Yes...yes, it's horrible! And the air conditioning in my house is broken and you can't imagine how hot it is! I feel like I'm going to die one of these days" The words came tumbling out of your mouth, since you hadn't had the time to stop and think about what exactly you wanted to say, and your nerves were playing the worst trick of your entire life.

Chan laughed again (even his laugh was pretty) and he nodded his head, not at all scared or surprised with the lexical vomit you just made.

"It must be like torture, really. You must be tired from the walk under the sun, why don't you sit down for a bit? The boys and I were planning to watch a movie" The brunette softly kicked one of the stools that were stored under the table in your direction.

You nodded shyly and took the seat he offered you, right in front of him. You left your phone on the cold marble of the table and looked around the kitchen for your best friend, you'd been surprised by the fact that he hadn't gotten into the conversation for five minutes and to be honest you desperately needed to focus on something other than Chan's penetrating gaze you felt on your face.

"Innie?" You called out to him with a small shout, loud enough for him to hear you even if he'd gone into the garden.

After a few seconds, your friend's blonde head peeked out of the left door that led to the living room, and a mischievous smile appeared on his face. "I'm sorry! Since you two were talking, we decided to go prepare things for the movie."

Jeongin paused and looked at you evilly, a look that you knew very well and that didn't give you a good feeling at all "Chan, why don't you prepare something to eat? I bought some snacks today, come when you have everything ready~" And before you could protest, he disappeared from your sight again while laughing and yelling something at Hyunjin.

You immediately tensed up and cursed Jeongin in your mind, how dare he leave you alone with your newfound crush. If he was getting revenge for the time you tried to play matchmaker and failed then he was being very childish, that'd been years ago!

While the insulting thoughts against your best friend and all his ancestors accumulated in your brain, from the corner of your eye you watched as Chan got up from his seat and went to the counter where the mentioned snacks and bowls of colors were located, apparently the prankster you called your best friend had already prepared the trap before you even arrived.

You didn't want to look weirder than you already felt so with your limbs shaking and making even the slightest of movements difficult; you also got up from your seat and slowly approached where Chan was, you stood next to him (close enough for him to know that you were willing to help but far enough not to invade his personal space).

He looked at you briefly and smiled sideways, and didn't say anything as he gently pushed a bowl towards you. The task wasn't very complicated per se, but it did become extremely difficult when the only thing you could focus on were the large, veiny hands of the boy next to you, you hadn't realized how attractive it was to see a man opening packets of potato chips and arranging them in a small container until now.

"Jeongin said we go to the same university, do you study the same as him?" You were startled by the sudden interruption of silence, you turned to look at Chan after finishing preparing the bowl with the nachos.

"Yes, I mean, no. We share some classes because some subjects are correlative in each one's career but I could never do the same as Innie" You smiled shyly and shook your head.

"I study psychology," You finally said and looked at your companion, who had his eyes open and bright like a puppy's (how could it be possible for a person to be incredibly attractive and adorable at the same time? It would have to be illegal), and you wondered what it was that'd amazed him so much, there were millions of other people studying the same thing as you.

Without meaning to, you raised an eyebrow; studying his reaction. He laughed again (it was something he loved to do, apparently) and turned his entire body towards you, resting his left hip against the counter and crossing his arms over his chest.

"That's incredible, the human mind is fascinating. I understand why you study that, for my part, I wouldn't read everything you have to read even if someone paid me."

You laughed loudly, infecting Chan as well. He was doing so with his whole body, his shoulders were shaking to the rhythm of his giggles and you could notice that, from time to time, a small squeak would appear in the sound of his laughter.

When the laughter died down, you looked at him again as you put the last bag of snacks in the cupboard in front of you.

"Yes, I mean, it's a lot to read but it's like you say. I'm interested in knowing the reason for behavior, and I would like to help people in the future. Mental health is something important" This last part came out in a whisper, you weren't used to revealing the reason for your career choice, most people told you that you should have chosen something that would make you rich in twenty years.

"That's incredible, I admire you a lot" Chan said in a soft voice, and you hadn't realized how close he'd gotten until you noticed the small touch of his fingers on your arm, the color quickly rose to your cheeks again and panic took over you, making you choke up when you spoke.

"Y-yes, thank you... not many think that way" And you moved your body away from his space; maybe a little abruptly but you were sure that if you continued in that position you were going to do or say something ridiculous, you couldn't trust your ability to reason at the moment.

Chan cleared his throat at your reaction and took two bowls in his hands, starting to walk towards the living room. You hadn't realized how loudly the other two boys were talking, were you so immersed in the situation to forget the outside world? Apparently yes.

"Are you done yet? The boys must be waiting" He stopped right in front of the door, waiting for you to take what you'd prepared.

You nodded softly, and after grabbing your preparations, you followed him into the living room.

You don't really remember what happened after that, you assume you watched the movies that the boys had already chosen before you arrived. You also don't remember if you had even paid attention, probably not, because you were very focused on keeping your breathing as normal as you could since unfortunately Hyunjin and Jeongin decided to each sit in an individual chair and by coincidence the only place left to sit was in the two-seat chair that your best friend's grandmother had given to his mother at her wedding, and conveniently Chan sat there too. So as the movie played on the screen, your heart raced with every accidental brush of your arms or legs against Chan's.

The only thing you remember clearly from that moment is that you couldn't help but look at his profile, trying to memorize every detail and every peculiarity of his expressions.

The rest of the summer felt like a haze, every time you made plans with Jeongin you knew Chan was going to be there. And that did nothing to dispel the feelings that were beginning to become more present with every minute you spent in his presence.

You liked him a little too much.

His kind nature and the way he treated everyone made you dizzy every time, but you were too shy to act on your feelings and unfortunately you weren't the only one who thought Chan was a good catch. Every now and then different girls approached him to ask him out, and although he always rejected them; you couldn't help but feel a little insecure about the situation. And there was also the small problem that he confessed to you one night in Hyunjin's garden: his last relationship had been somewhat toxic, and although it ended years ago, he was deeply hurt and didn't feel ready yet to fall for someone again.

That confession left a sour taste in your mouth, so you decided not to actively act on your feelings, you really didn't want to make Chan uncomfortable or force him into something he didn't want to do, let alone ruin the friendship you were building. But something as strong as love cannot be contained, and one sleepless night you found yourself scribbling in your notebook the things you wanted to say to him, the things you liked about him, and how he made you feel when you looked at him.

You weren't thinking when you left the first envelope on his desk, it was a completely impulsive decision that you regretted the moment you left his classroom. But when you turned around to go back and throw the letter into the trash, he already found it.

At first he didn't read them, you knew because you'd overheard when he mentioned it to Hyunjin during an outing the three of you made, Chan believed that one of his friends was playing a prank on him.

And that was the last straw that broke the camel's back, although you told yourself that you weren't going to write anymore letters for the sake of your friendship and your own feelings you had to let him know (even if anonymously) that he was someone worthy of love and that he wasn't what the people in his past made him believe he was.

⋆｡ﾟ☁︎｡⋆｡

Once you arrived at the classroom (miraculously before the professor, you didn't think you could endure another lecture and there were still three more hours before leaving the university) you sat down in your respective seat by the window. The day was really beautiful, and from your place you could see the large patio where the entire student body went to relax between classes, it was your favorite place in the entire building and at this moment you wanted nothing more than to be leaning against a tree feeling the warm sunlight on your face.

"I'm not saying you have to tell him that but don't you think it's been too long already?" Jeongin didn't seem to want to drop the topic for today, he'd gotten up from his seat taking advantage of the fact that there was still no sign of the teacher and sat at your table, almost knocking all the things that were on top of it to the floor. You rested your head on the bench and waved a hand in the air, brushing it off in an attempt to say 'leave me alone already'.

Your best friend snorted exasperatedly, "You really are a special case, you've been in love with him for a year, for God's sake."

At the boy's aggressive tone of voice, you took your head off the table and looked at him with a frown. He looked back at you like he always did: challenging and forcing you to speak for yourself.

"It's not as easy as you say, Jeongin" You spat angrily.

"For all I know, if he finds out, he could throw my stupid letters in the trash and confessing would not only make me look weird but it would also ruin the friendship we have" You lowered your face, feeling a little sad "And the last thing I would like to do is lose him"

Jeongin’s expression softened as he realized the depth of your anxiety, and he reached out to place a reassuring hand on your shoulder. "I get it, I really do. You don't want to jeopardize what you have but you deserve happiness too, you know? Maybe it's time to take a risk."

“I don’t even think I have a chance” You sighed, feeling defeated.

Jeongin moved closer and lowered his voice conspiratorially, "You may have more possibilities than you think, but sometimes you have to give destiny a little push."

You raised an eyebrow at his choice of words and just as you were about to question him further, the professor made an appearance in the classroom ordering everyone to take their respective seats and apologizing for the delay. Your best friend flashed you a bright smile with his trademark dimples and snuck over to his table, effectively ending the conversation and leaving you wondering what he meant for the rest of the day.

⋆｡ﾟ☁︎｡⋆｡

If Jeongin's plan was for you to not sleep for a week, then he'd achieved it. His words had been spinning through your head like a whirlpool that seemed to have no end. You knew that he'd been friends with the brunette for a longer time than you, but were they close enough that the youngest knew the secrets inside Chan's heart?

Or was he giving you the advice that all friends gave to their other friends desperate to believe in the illusion that the person they like reciprocates their feelings? No, Jeongin wouldn't do that, he was too honest for his own good and besides you'd known each other longer (your mothers said you were born to be friends). So did that mean there really was a chance?

No, of course not, that was ridiculous.

You shook your head in an attempt to get rid of those thoughts as you rang the doorbell at Hyunjin's house. Your group had agreed to meet to study and you needed to have a clear mind, the exams were around the corner and you couldn't afford to keep your brain preoccupied thinking about something that would never happen.

The minutes passed slowly as you waited for the homeowner, and while you were thinking about ringing the doorbell again fearing that the boys inside hadn't heard you, the door suddenly opened, and nothing could have prepared you to see the person who has been living rent free in your mind, you knew he would be there, but you didn't expect to face him so quickly.

"Hey, you arrived just in time, Hyunjin's mom just brought us some drinks" Chan was his usual self, with his beautiful smile plastered on his face and his relaxed attitude.

You blinked once, twice, three times before you managed a small forced smile and responded, "Oh, great, thanks," and you stood there in silence, unable to look him in the eyes.

Chan tilted his head in silent question at your attitude, "Is everything okay?"

His concern for your well-being was evident in his voice and he struck a chord in your heart. You looked at him briefly, meeting his gaze for a fleeting moment and nodded, still struggling to find your voice.

“Yeah, I’m fine,” You finally responded, trying to sound casual despite the jumble of emotions inside you.

Chan's friendly demeanor never wavered as he led you into the house, you followed him with a notable distance between your bodies and so when you arrived at the living room where the boys were already seated with open textbooks and a monstrous amount of things to eat you almost ran to sit next to Jeongin, an attitude that didn't go unnoticed by the blonde, who looked at you with his eyebrows raised in a telepathic question.

Meanwhile, Chan didn't take his eyes off you as he sat next to Hyunjin on the couch in front of where you and your best friend were.

The afternoon went by slowly, too slowly for your liking, you'd gone with all the desire to study and get your mind out of the anxiety that was consuming you, but that attempt had been futile.

Although your gaze remained glued to your notes and your blue highlighter (which hadn't highlighted anything in the last hour, you'd read the same paragraph five times without getting a clue of what it was trying to say) you felt how two eyes were burning holes in your figure. The room was suffocatingly silent, and you were sure that your irregular breathing was evident to the entire group; your nerves were so on edge that when your best friend's voice filled the void you almost jumped in your place.

"I'm tired, how about we take a break?"Jeongin raised his arms towards the ceiling, stretching his back and then collapsing gracelessly against the soft cushions of the sofa.

Hyunjin nodded while massaging his neck, stiff after so many hours of looking down at his notes and reading "I thought no one was going to say it, I was going crazy."

Chan didn't say anything, he just closed his notebooks and imitated Jeongin in his relaxed pose against the couch. You felt out of place when the boys started chatting about meaningless things to lighten the atmosphere.

You only nodded when you felt your input was necessary, or laughed when you thought that was the reaction you should have but you didn't speak, because in fact, you weren't sure you were going to say anything coherent or at least make your voice louder than a whisper, so you decided that the best course of action was to stay quiet.

If the boys noticed it, they didn't say anything, and you couldn't be more grateful for it.

"You know" Chan interrupted the laughter of the other two boys after a not-so-funny story told by Hyunjin.

Everyone focused their attention on him, the tone of voice he'd used was more serious than his usual; so serious that it forced you to look up for the first time since the recess began and you found Chan's brown eyes looking directly at you, doing it so intensely that you thought he was staring right into your soul.

You held your breath, but you weren't prepared for what he said next.

"My secret admirer hasn't written to me in a few days" He was still looking at you, but there was something strange hidden in his irises, something you couldn't decipher.

Silence once again took over Hyunjin's living room, and the tension could be cut with a knife, it almost seemed like time had stopped when the brunette pronounced the last syllable. Your mouth felt dry, and your palms began to sweat. The weight of his words floated in the air and a thousand thoughts passed through your mind, each one more disconcerting than the last.

Hyunjin snorted, and looked maliciously at Chan "Maybe they are tired of you."

His mocking comment broke the heavy silence like thunder. Jeongin joined in with a playful smile, taking the opportunity to tease Chan mercilessly. “Maybe your secret admirer found someone else,” he joked, his tone light and teasing, “Or maybe they are just playing hard to get.”

Your heart was pounding in your chest, wanting to burst while the boys laughed at Chan's expense while he, in response, rolled his eyes and smiled sarcastically at the jokes that his friends kept saying, he also looked at you from time to time making your discomfort even more evident.

You desperately searched for words to contribute to the conversation, your voice choked by the rising anxiety. But as Jeongin and Hyunjin's playful teasing continued, you remained silent, feeling like a bystander in a conversation that was becoming more cryptic by the second. Chan's gaze never left you, and despite the teasing, there was something in his eyes that betrayed a deeper understanding. His comment felt like a puzzle piece falling into place, yet you couldn't put your finger on what he truly knew.

As the laughter subsided, the room descended into an awkward silence once more, and then Chan finally spoke up, his tone more subdued than before. "Well, whoever it is," he began, his eyes still locked on yours, "I hope they know they've brightened my days with their letters."

The comment hung in the air, carrying a weight that seemed to pull everyone into its gravity. Jeongin and Hyunjin exchanged glances, their playful demeanor suddenly giving way to something more conspiracy.

You, on the other hand, felt an overwhelming mix of emotions. The anxiety that'd been building throughout the day reached a crescendo. You wanted to say something, to respond in some way, but the words caught in your throat.

Hyunjin broke the silence once more, this time with a touch of sincerity in his voice. "Whoever they are," he said, "they must really care about you, man." Jeongin nodded in agreement, and the room seemed to shift, it was a subtle transformation, but one that you couldn't help but notice.

Chan smiled, a genuine one that reached his eyes. "Yeah," he admitted, "They do mean a lot to me."

You desperately needed a moment to collect your thoughts and emotions after that serious conversation, so you mumbled something about getting a drink from the kitchen, excusing yourself with a weak smile and slowly, you retreated from the living room, the voices of the boys fading as you put some distance between you and the group.

In the dimly lit kitchen, you leaned against the countertop, your heart still racing from the tension in the room. The realization that Chan cherished those anonymous letters hit you like a ton of bricks. You'd never imagined how much they meant to him.

Just as you were lost in thought, the sound of footsteps behind you made you jump. You turned to find Chan standing there, a serious yet gentle expression on his face. His presence seemed to fill the room with warmth, and your anxiety ratcheted up another notch.

"Hey," he said softly, "You okay?"

You nodded, unable to form words an he took a step closer, his gaze never left yours.

Chan's brown eyes bore into yours, and for a moment, it felt like the world had frozen around you. You couldn't contain the thoughts racing through your mind any longer. With a trembling voice, you finally asked the question that'd been gnawing at you.

"Do you know who's been sending those letters?"

Chan's expression remained calm, but you could see a glimmer of something in his eyes, a hint of knowing. He didn't answer immediately, instead, he stepped closer, narrowing the distance between you.

His voice was soft as he replied, "I have a feeling I might have a clue."

Your heart pounded in your chest as you searched his face for more hints. What did he mean by 'a clue'? It was clear he was being deliberately vague, and it only added to your curiosity.

"But," he continued, "I'd like to hear it from you. Tell me, do you know who it is?"

You hesitated, the weight of the truth pressing down on you. The walls between you and Chan seemed to dissolve, and the vulnerability in his eyes was mirrored in your own. With a shaky breath, you summoned the courage to speak, your voice quivering with fear and anticipation.

"It's me."

The admission hung in the air, heavy and uncertain. You couldn't bring yourself to meet his gaze, your eyes locked on the floor as you waited for his reaction. The seconds felt like hours as you replayed all the letters, and the emotions you'd poured into them.

Chan's silence stretched, and the tension in the room became palpable. Your heart raced, and you feared the worst — rejection, awkwardness, or even laughter.

Then, he reached out, gently lifting your chin with his fingers, forcing you to look into his eyes. The warmth and kindness in his gaze melted away your fears.

"Thank you," he whispered, his voice soft and sincere. "I've cherished every single one."

As tears welled up in your eyes, Chan reached out to gently wipe them away with his thumb. He pulled you into a comforting embrace, holding you close as your emotions overwhelmed you. You couldn't hold back the tears any longer, and they flowed freely as you nestled into his embrace. He whispered soothing words, his voice a balm to your soul, reassuring you that everything would be okay.

After a moment of shared comfort, you pulled away slightly, looking up at him with curiosity. "But how did you know it was me?" you finally asked, your voice still trembling.

Chan smiled softly, brushing a strand of hair from your face, a knowing twinkle in his eye, and replied, "I had my suspicions, especially after some of the things you wrote. But what really gave it away was your handwriting."

You blinked in surprise.

Handwriting? You hadn't considered that, no, haven't even thought about it when you started this a year ago, and to be honest you felt a little dumb.

Chan continued, "I recognized your handwriting from a birthday card you gave me a while back. It was similar to the writing in the letters. And then, well, I saw you looking at me during our hangouts, and it all just started to make sense."

You blushed, feeling a mix of embarrassment and relief. It seemed like you'd left more clues than you thought. But instead of feeling exposed, you felt a strange sense of comfort knowing that he'd noticed your feelings all along.

With a shy smile, you said, "I guess I'm not very good at hiding my feelings, am I?"

Chan chuckled softly. "No, but that's okay. I'm glad you told me."

As you gazed into Chan's eyes, you noticed something change in his expression. The initial surprise and curiosity gave way to a more tender, understanding look. He cupped your face gently, his touch warm and reassuring.

"You know," he began softly, "I've always appreciated those letters. They made me feel special, like someone out there truly understood me. And I never wanted to pressure you into revealing yourself," Chan continued. "I wanted you to do it when you were ready."

"I was just afraid," you admitted, your voice barely above a whisper. "Afraid of what you might think, of how it might change things between us."

Chan's thumb traced small circles on your cheek as he reassured you, "Don't be. This doesn't change how I feel about what we have. If anything, it makes it even more special."

A tear escaped from the corner of your eye, but this time, it wasn't a tear of anxiety or fear. It was a tear of relief, of happiness. You leaned into Chan's touch, and he leaned closer, his eyes locked on yours, and before you knew it, his lips met yours in a soft, gentle kiss. The world seemed to melt away as your lips met his, you felt the warmth of his body against yours, and the sensation sent shivers down your spine. His hands cradled your face, holding you gently but firmly, as if he never wanted to let you go.

The taste of his lips was sweet and comforting, like a warm embrace on a cold winter's day, you could feel the steady beat of Chan's heart, matching the rhythm of your own. The world around you disappeared, and there was only the two of you.

And just as you were lost in that sweet moment, the kitchen door burst open, and in walked your friends, their playful banter filling the room while wearing grins so wide they threatened to split their faces. Jeongin couldn't help but tease you, waggling his eyebrows playfully. "Well, well, looks like someone finally got the courage to make a move!"

Hyunjin joined in with a mock-sympathetic tone. "And here we thought we'd have to wait another century for this to happen!"

You blushed furiously, pulling away from Chan who chuckled in amusement, still holding you close. "You guys have impeccable timing," he remarked, his voice laced with sarcasm.

Jeongin winked at you, "Hey! We're just glad we won't have to hear you two mooning over each other anymore."

[peachhcs]

https://www.tumblr.com/peachhcs/767185748593164288/httpswwwtumblrcompeachhcs766739881092415488

i love this omg! i’m glad they are together maybe they need one more talking seriously to each other and samy is trying to tell him her fears and what she is scared of now it’s a much needed talk

i do love a side plot but this also does feel like it could easily be in the main plot to you know? whatever you want !

part 9!! sorry this took me longer to finish 🥲 let me know what else we want from this side plot!

au masterlist

part 1, part 2, part 3, part 4, part 5, part 6, part 7, part 8

will found samy on the steps of back patio as the day drew into mid afternoon. they were watching a movie together and when the hockey player vaguely remembered dozing off from being somewhat jet lagged still. when he woke back up, samy wasn’t beside him like she was when he fell asleep and the tv that had the movie playing was running through a random tv show.

the girl’s back was to him, so she didn’t will at first and he didn’t didn’t say anything. he took those few seconds to admire her and the way her brown curls fell down her torso into frizzy little ends. to will, she looked so pretty like that. the sun was casting a perfect glow around her figure despite it being early october. god, he adored her so much.

will finally cleared his throat to grab her attention. she spun around, surprised, but happy to see him there.

“hi, didn’t know if you were gonna wake up,” the soccer player teased some as he joined her on the step and immediately reached her fingers up to brush his misplaced curls away.

“yeah, guess the jet lag got to me,” will admitted while returning her soft smile with one of his own.

“guess so. sleep well?” samy hummed, still toying with his hair.

“yeah, i slept fine. maybe i’ll get used to it by the time i leave again,” the couple shared a laugh. she eventually pulled her hand away warning a small grunt in response and will missing the way her fingers felt in his hair and on his skin.

“what are you doing out here?” he finally asked, his gaze following hers that diverted towards the hughes’ nearly five acre yard in front of them. in every space and corner, will could picture a memory that occurred there and the thoughts earned a bright smile on his features.

everything in michigan felt so nostalgic to him nowadays after finishing the ntdp. will spent primitive teenage years in this backyard and to think he was in the nhl now and they weren’t fifteen anymore.

“just thinking,” the brunette shrugged with her good shoulder.

“anything in particular?” will smiled, poking just a bit.

“not really, no.”

they exchanged a glance and maybe will was just in his head again, but he didn’t quite believe her. he knew when samy had something on her mind and didn’t say it and this was one of those times. she was being way to quiet for his liking because she’d always have 100 things to talk about no matter how stupid it was.

“you’re gonna say you don’t believe me, right?” samy beat him to it, a tiny smile on her lips because she also knew what her boyfriend was thinking. that was just how well they knew one another. will’s cheeks flushed a bit.

“uh, no. i wasn’t, but if there is something on your mind, you know you can talk to me right?” will offered because he wasn’t gonna over push it if samy really didn’t want to talk about anything.

“what if i said it’s about us?” her tone dropped and will could feel the seriousness washing over them.

he sucked in a breath, suddenly feeling the need to straighten himself up. “okay,” he waited for her to go on.

“i guess i’ve just been thinking more about..about why i didn’t call you..” the brunette began just as will shook his head.

“no, no you know you don’t have to keep apologizing about that. i get it. i do. i—“

“no, no, will, i should’ve called you. i don’t know why i didn’t. i..i guess i’ve just been..scared?” the girl’s voice became small and timid which wasn’t something will heard a lot from samy.

“scared? of what? me?” his heart twisted at that idea.

“no, no, god, no. i’d never be scared of you, don’t worry,” samy quickly clarified.

“then what is it? is it something i’m doing? not doing?” will was really determined to not fuck this all up again, so he’d literally do anything to make samy comfortable and meet her needs.

“no, it’s nothing you’re doing. i think it’s just my own insecurities,” she shook her head, but will wasn’t really following.

“what do you mean?”

“i think..i think i’m still a little bit affected from our breakup this summer. it might sound stupid but my insecurities have made me feel like i’m a burden to people and i’ll just be too much again. or not enough? i don’t really know,” samy dodged his glance by staring at the ground.

her words felt like an arrow straight into the hockey player’s heart that he didn’t even know how to respond. a pang of guilt washed over him and suddenly, he felt horrible that he fucked their entire relationship in the first place all because he thought he couldn’t do it.

a painful silence washed over them mixed with a bit of tension when will didn’t answer right away. samy bit at her lip, knowing she shouldn’t have brought it up in the first place.

“shit, i’m sorry. i shouldn’t have said anything. it’s stupid—“

“wait, no, no it’s not stupid. it’s not. don’t invalidate your feelings,” will finally found his words.

“i-i’m really sorry i’ve made you feel this way. i was being dumb and..fuck. you’re not a burden, samy. god, you could never be too much or a burden to me. i’d literally drop everything for you i mean, i did drop everything for you,” the boy continued, trying his best to reassure samy of any doubt in her mind.

he searched for her gaze and when she finally looked at him, will saw all of it in that single gaze. the hurt, the pain, the mistrust and it broke his heart into a million pieces that she still felt all of this.

will reached out slowly, a hesitation and a silent request that he could touch her face. when she didn’t refuse, will’s hands cupped her cheeks, bringing her so close that their noses were inches apart.

“i love you, samy. nothing will ever change that for me, i promise. you mean so much to me. i’m really sorry you felt like you couldn’t tell me you were hurt and i’m trying to do better. i wanna be better for you,” will admitted everything. he watched the girl’s gaze slowly soften out which he took as a good sign, especially when her forehead laid against his own.

“i love you, will. you mean a lot to me too. it’s just been a long journey to getting back together that i’m still working on. i’m really glad you’re here,” the two exchanged loving smiles and that’s when samy opened her mouth to kiss him. he took the hint fairly quickly, their lips connecting and closing the little space left.

“tell me what needs to happen to gain your full trust back and i’ll make it happen. i promise,” will said when they pulled apart.

samy smiled, “how about just spending all our time together until you have to leave again?”

“i like the sound of that,” will kissed the side of her head.

the couple stayed outside until it got too cold to be out there in just a sweatshirt. they cuddled back up on the couch together and for once, there was no anxiety about anything—just what they were eating for dinner and what movie they were gonna watch next.

[echoflowerwhispers]

Hiii you’re really cool and stufff uhhh I didn’t actually play this ask out….take this as a free rant about why character(s) to us card…-?

OMG VINNY HIIIII!!! You get this very special discord screenshot because you're my fav asker :3

Ranting below the cut!! (Its about Error btw)

I don't really have a lot of headcanons for him so instead I'll just explain stuff from my version of the utmv!!

Error has amnesia and doesn't remember how he came to be. He woke up in the Antivoid one day with nothing but a hatred for AUs.

He slowly learned to use his powers, and after he deemed himself strong enough, he began destroying AUs. Eventually, he met Blue that way, and Blue was the first to show him sympathy, so of course, he had to kidnap him. Blue tried his best to stay calm and not annoy Error, but eventually, he began to close in on himself and lose the hope of ever being able to go back home. He was depressed and his mental state made Error worry for him. Error, never having felt such an emotion for someone before, returned Blue back to his AU and denied the fact he actually cared about Blue.

He met Ink a while after that. His distruction brought Ink's attention, and now Ink wanted to see what the fuss was about. Ink was nothing like Blue, but he still tried to understand Error. Unfortunately, Ink is annoying as fuck so Error became his sworn enemy. They always fought over petty things even while they were having an actual battle. That never changes lol.

One day, while spying on random AUs, Error saw Nightmare talking to Sci. From what he heard, Nightmare was a powerful and dangerous monster who crushed all who stood before him. Error, thinking he was better than him, decided to pay Nightmare a visit. They had a small fight in Nightmare's kitchen, and Error somehow came out victorious. Unfortunately for Error, he started to feel bad for hitting the guy over the head with a kettle, so he took him to Sci and left him there. When Nightmare came back to the castle, he found Error binging UnderNovela on his sofa (I wrote a fic about the bad guys, and this stuff is also part of it if you wanna read more about it lol).

Error eventually made an 'alliance' with Nightmare, refusing to call it what it is (a friendship). He likes to visit the castle and hangs out with Nightmare in OuterTale sometimes.

What will happen in the future:

Error and Ink will form a truce, and for the first time in forever, Error will stop avoiding Blue and actually talk to him.

Error will catch feelings for Ink and break their truce to avoid having to see Ink (he'll still see Ink but only when they fight). Eventually, Ink will find Error in OuterTale, and they will talk about it.

The truce is back again, but the idiots still avoid each other because awkward lol.

Dream and Nightmare have their truce prompting Ink to ask Error to live with him since it's gonna be boring, not fighting and stuff. Error agrees after a few days of thinking it over.

The two start dating (much to Nightmare's annoyance), and Ink starts working on getting rid of Error's phobia through exposure therapy.

Headcanons:

Error likes knitting but hates crochet because "it's too complicated"

He likes looking at the stars but can't remember why. Therefore, OuterTale was the first AU he didn't instantly want to destroy.

He needs glasses to see short distances, but he hates wearing them.

He likes cute things, but he'll never admit it (this is mostly about the dolls).

He can't actually speak Spanish, but he pretends he can.

He has back problems from sleeping on a bean bag.

He worries the people who care about him will see him the same way the others see him.

He only eats junk food because he doesn't actually need to eat, so why bother eating healthy.

I probably have more headcanons, but I'm really tired rn and need to sleep so uhh yeah. OKAY BYE!!!!

[iamfujoshiwe]

VegasPete Rambling

I usually only read Japanese Manga. I even filtered my search to strictly show only Japanese Manga. And out of nowhere I have this urge to try watching Live Action BL Drama I filtered them to Japanese too. But to be honest I'm not fond of Japanese BL Drama. Well maybe my taste is just different from others (I only watched a few of them so who knows). Sometimes the acting is weird. I guess a good comedy/gag in manga is just not translated well enough in live action.

Aaannndd in the middle of searching BL Drama I discovered the fckn "KINNPORSCHE THE SERIES". I saw them a few times on tumblr. Some gifs. Some fangirling posts. I was sceptic about Thai BL. I didn't even know Thai BL exist until now. But I decided to give it a try anyway. And boy do I fell hard. HARD!!! It altered the chemistry in my brain!! KPTS had aired two years ago and I just found it now???? Have I live in the cave all my life????

From ep 1 I immediately fell in love. The acting, the character's chemistry, and everything is so amazing. I didn't sense any awkward acting/dialogue I usually saw in Japanese BL Drama (No offense really, it was just me). I literally stopped reading all my followed BL/Non BL Manga and and even stopped reading the new ones too.

All the time my mind just screaming "WHAT A FINE MAN" everytime Porsche appeared. But for real Apo is soooooo good looking.

And when Kinn appeared I just got distracted by his chest. Sir, buttons exist for a reason you know. What grudge do you have with them? (Not that I mind of course). Mile is born to play Kinn.

Then I met VegasPete couple. Let me tell you, when I have obsesssion I really do obsess them to oblivion. Having tunnel vision about them. VegasPete takes the cake.

At first I have this thought: Every actor in KPTS is so good looking so why this vegas character is… not as good looking as them? (Yeah I want to kill my past self for that).

I have this funny feeling about thai actor's voice. Maybe because Thai language is a foreign language to me. I don't hear them often, as opposed to english and japanese (and my main language of course). That's one of the reason why I filtered my search to just Japanese BL Drama. But Vegas' voice OMG. I adore his voice so much. And Bible speaking english is just * CHEF'S KISS * I melted everytime I listen to his voice. BIBLE SPEAKING ENGLISH IS A GIFT TO HUMANITY!! AND THAT HUMANITY IS ME!!!

When VegasPete plot took off, my focus immediately shift to them (I am sorry Kinn and Porsche). I can't count how many times I rewatched their scenes.

I definitely have to include Pete's cry in Yok's bar (when he met vegas after he had ran away from safehouse) and swimming pool (after Vegas got shot). Such a raw emotion. 100 point for Build! I come to love him because his crying voice lol.

Vegas and Pete easily become my favorites. So naturally I have to search for their actor right? And thus began my search for Bible and Build…..

ONLY FOR MY HEART TO BE CRUSHED! MY SHIP HAD SUNK ALREADY!

Build's scandal on his old socmed post? His scandal with Poi? I don't really mind. But Build talking bad about Bible? Yeah my heart couldn't take it. It's in pieces (In a way I'm glad because when all the chaos took place I haven't entered the fandom yet so I never encounter their fan's toxicity). But I respect their decision to go their own way. I know it's not healthy for them to continue working together. So yeah I am sad but their mental health is more important.

Soooooo now I'm still deep in VegasPete swamp (with occasional breaking down when I remember BibleBuild). I choose to sink in VegasPete fanfictions on ao3. And woah there are soooo many amazing author there. Their fics are spectacular! I can't thank them enough for doing God's work creating those holy VegasPete fics.

Oh and anyway I read VegasPete novel too. But I don't like it…. their character are too different from the show. Honestly fanfictions are waaay better…. KinnPorsche novel too. One chapter and I was like nope, I couldn't bring myself to read further. End of story.

And that's why as of now I still can't read manga or watch any other BL Drama. Damn VegasPete! (Affectionate). My waiting list are Not Me The Series and Last Twilight. I hope I'll collect enough braincell soon so I can start watching them. There are so many BL and Non BL manga I haven't continue reading.

[pinchofhoney]

HIII

First off: YAAAYYY we hit the same milestones together omg!

You're practically my tumblr soulmate now!!

Secondly, my request:

Ben Barnes with angst prompt 1 and fluff prompt 9.

Maybe like best friends in love but they see each other fall in love with other people before they accept their feelings and get together??

a tale of chance and destiny # 200 follower special event

» prompt event » special events masterlist

angst prompt one: “i guess i wasn’t enough, was i?”

fluff prompt nine: “how much longer are you going to hide your feelings for me, dummy?”

gif is not mine, credit to the owner

ben barnes x fem!reader

word count: 1.4k

warning: a little angst with a fluff touch, friends to lovers

summary: Life can be a whirlwind of surprises, especially when it comes to matters of the heart.

a/n: oh, who do we have here?? my sweetest tumblr dot com user<33 hello!! let's shine together and continue to be delusional by writing things that will never happen lmao

pages that may interest you: masterlist ♡ taglist ♡ who i write for

taglist: @myladydarkling @alexxavicry

The torment of unrequited love had been with you for as long as you could remember. Your heart ached every time you looked at Ben, your best friend, and realized that he would probably never feel the same way about you again. Yet, you couldn't help but hold onto hope that maybe, just maybe, he would see you in a different light.

As you both grew up together, spending countless hours playing in the park, building forts in the woods, and dreaming about your future, your bond grew stronger. You shared everything with each other, including your passion for acting. You made a promise to pursue it together, and you did just that.

But fate had a cruel way of teasing you. Your friendship took an unexpected turn when you were cast as love interests in a movie. You both tried to resist the chemistry between you, but it was too strong to ignore. You dove headfirst into a romantic relationship, believing that it was meant to be. However, the harsh reality of the entertainment industry set in, and the demands of your busy schedules made it almost impossible to find time for each other. The once-strong bond began to fray, and you both realized that you were better off as friends.

The aftermath was a painful and bittersweet journey. Years went by, and both you and Ben tried to move on with your lives, dating other people and pursuing your careers. But the feelings you had for each other never completely vanished. You could still feel the intense longing, the deep yearning for something you couldn't have. The memories of what could have been haunted you, and you found yourself daydreaming about Ben, wondering if things could have been different.

One particularly rough day on set, you returned home exhausted and defeated. You collapsed onto your bed and let out a deep sigh. Your mind was filled with images of Ben with his new girlfriend, laughing and smiling together on social media. You couldn't help but feel a twinge of jealousy and sadness.

You dragged yourself to the bathroom and stood in front of the mirror. You stared at your reflection, feeling completely drained. “I guess I wasn't enough, was I?” you said to yourself, your voice barely above a whisper.

The tears fell freely down your face, and you tried to wipe them away with shaking hands. But they kept coming, a never-ending reminder of the pain you felt deep inside. You didn't know how to move on, how to forget about Ben and the feelings you had for him for all these years.

You tried to push away the feeling of sadness and jealousy that crept up inside you. You knew you shouldn't feel this way, that Ben was free to be with whoever he wanted. But the thought of him with someone else just made your heart ache.

You leaned against the bathroom sink and closed your eyes, trying to calm your racing thoughts. Suddenly, your phone buzzed on the counter, interrupting your thoughts. It was a text from Ben.

“Hey, are you okay? You seemed pretty down today,” the message read.

Your heart skipped a beat as you read his words. You hesitated for a moment before typing out a response.

“Not really. Just feeling a bit overwhelmed,” you replied.

A few seconds later, your phone buzzed again.

The pain was becoming unbearable. The thought of Ben with another woman was a constant thorn in your side, a reminder of everything you couldn't have. And now, with him asking if you wanted to talk, the temptation to spill your heart out was almost too much to bear.

You wanted nothing more than to tell him everything. To let him know how much you loved him and how much it hurt to see him with someone else. But you knew that it would only make things worse. So, you swallowed your pain and replied with a simple “No, I'm fine.”

The silence that followed was deafening. You sighed deeply and cast a quick glance at your reflection. Your smudged makeup made you look even more pathetic, as if crying for a man you couldn't have wasn't enough.

The realization hit you hard – you were in love with someone who would never love you back. You tried to push the thought away, but it clung to you like a disease. Every moment you spent with Ben was filled with the unspoken tension of unrequited love.

You had to pull yourself together, especially since tomorrow you were going to have to visit the set where you were supposed to meet Ben. You took a quick shower, where you thoroughly cleaned your face of any leftover makeup and changed into comfortable pajamas, then went straight to bed, trying not to think about your friend and the girl who made him smile widely.

But sleep was elusive, and your mind raced with thoughts of Ben. You couldn't escape the pain, no matter how hard you tried. You tossed and turned, wishing for the sweet release of unconsciousness, but it never came.

The morning came too soon, and you dragged yourself out of bed, feeling more exhausted than ever. As you got dressed, the thought of seeing Ben again filled you with both dread and excitement. You knew that you had to be strong, to put on a brave face and act like everything was okay.

But as soon as you saw him, all your resolve crumbled. The way he smiled at you, the sound of his voice, the way he moved – it all reminded you of what you couldn't have.

Despite trying to keep your feelings under control, you found it increasingly difficult to hide your emotions for Ben. Every time you saw him with someone else, your heart ached. You tried to convince yourself that his happiness was all that mattered, but deep down, you knew you were lying to yourself.

Days turned into weeks and weeks into months, and you both continued living your lives as best as you could. But little did you know, Ben was also struggling with his feelings for you. You had always assumed he was happy in his relationships, but that wasn't the case.

One day, after a long day of work, Ben asked you to come over to his apartment for a drink. You happily accepted, excited to spend some time with him. As you walked in, you couldn't help but feel nostalgic. Nothing had changed since your last visit a few months ago.

After catching up on each other's lives, you and Ben had a few drinks and began to feel more relaxed in each other's company. As the night wore on, Ben turned to you and with a twinkle in his eye, asked, “How much longer are you going to hide your feelings for me, dummy?” You felt your heart skip a beat, unsure of how to respond. You had always been afraid of confessing your feelings to Ben, afraid that it might ruin your friendship, especially since it didn't work out for you once. But Ben had something else to say, “We broke up with Lena a few days ago, and I couldn't keep it up any longer. To hide what I really feel and I know you feel the same.”

You couldn't believe it. The man you had secretly loved for so long had just confessed that he felt the same way about you. Without hesitation, you leaned in and kissed him. It was a sweet, gentle kiss that felt like all the stars in the sky had aligned just for you. It felt like everything finally made sense, and all your fears were put to rest.

You spent the rest of the night talking about your future together, dreaming up all the amazing things you could do and be as a couple. You snuggled up together on the couch, feeling content and happy.

As you left Ben's apartment that night, you couldn't help but feel grateful for all the years of friendship that had brought you to this moment. You had been through so much together, and now you were finally able to take the next step in your journey together.

You knew that the road ahead wouldn't be without its challenges. You had made mistakes in the past, and you were determined not to repeat them. But as you looked up at the starry sky, you knew that destiny had brought you and Ben together for a reason. You placed your trust in the universe and felt a sense of peace knowing that everything would work out as it should.

[jonnyparable]

THROWBACK FIT

Because I'm throwing back a drink and having a fit. My sims in TS4 are doing their dishes in the master bath, while the dishwasher sits there doing f**k all, so I decided to go back all the way to my first posts on Reddit, where my humble online Sims presence began . Friends, I'm so wistful for my ex, why am I in this new relationship??

Anyway I found these really old pictures on my Reddit. I'm glad they are there for posterity, and I can look back at it and see how far things have fallen. This was my renovated Pleasantview, with Sim State University, renamed Willowbrook, and the Downtown subhoods. I remember my Pleasantview had a pet shop, cafe, bakery, grocer and clothing boutiques, along with some owned businesses, like the florist, gift shop, and an Art Gallery, owned by Darren Dreamer, who lived in a Firehouse.

Willowbrook University I don't remember at all. I vaguely remember referencing the college Max Goof went to, but that's all. Honestly this place looks amazing and I think I didn't even complete it, but oh well.

I still remember my thought process for Downtown. The idea is that it's the Old Town area from The Sims 1, and years later, the area is really built up, and the inhabitants of the original town moved further into the suburbs, hence creating Pleasantview. The Old Town lots are kinda still there, like the Diner, the New Orleans lot, and the park.

Playing in Windenburg has made me miss Veronaville. This was what I did with mine. I wish I took more pictures of it. I don't even remember much about it, I don't remember playing in it. But looking at it now, I kinda wish I did :(

And here's the original three Vacation hoods. Guys remember when you got three vacation worlds in one pack and you could also make your own from scratch? Omg ok I need to stop. I'm going to cry.

[nervousgardenerkid]

Request of Steve Harrington kissing readers pouty lips?

A kiss a day makes the pout go away

a/n: this is adorable omg?? as someone with pouty lips i would DIE for this😭i changed this up a little bit so i hope you don't mind! :) happy reading and credit to the gif owner! <3

warnings: none really! steve is head over heels for the reader, someone is mean to reader in the beginning, i don't think i used any pronouns but someone refers to the reader as a girl!

He knows he shouldn't say it, but Steve loves the little pout on your lips whenever things don't go your way. He feels his heart grow three times its size and the urge to kiss your pout away is something he always has to fight off. If he’s being completely honest, he can pinpoint the exact moment he wanted to kiss your pouts away.

The first time was in third grade during recess. He remembers playing on the monkey bars with his friends when you came running over in your overalls with a brightly colored shirt paired with it.

“Can I play with you guys?” You asked with wide and eager eyes. Steve nodded his head ready for you to join, but Joey was quick to answer.

“Eww, no way! You're a girl you have cooties!”

In an instant, your lips formed into a pout as you gently kick around the wood chips that are scattered around the park.

“I don't have cooties...”

Steve didn't know it yet, but his heart broke at the sight. Whenever he would get sad and start to pout his mom would spread kisses all over his cheeks until he began to smile again. The thought of doing that kinda grossed Steve out at such a young age, but he was surprised that that was the first thought to pop into his mind.

Would you want someone to kiss your cheeks until you smiled again? Would you even like someone who wasn't your parent to be that close to you?

“Yes, you do!” Joey shouted while climbing to the top of the monkey bars. “All girls have cooties, and they're dumb!”

Steve never really liked Joey, he just had cool toy cars that his dad would never buy him, so Steve started to be his friend, but at that moment he didn't like Joey at all. He wasn't going to say anything about it obviously, but to this day he still kicks himself for not running after you to comfort you.

-

The second time Steve thought about kissing your pout away was in eighth grade. Although school wasn't his strongest suit, he loved history class. He always thought it was an interesting subject and it just came easy to him. You on the other hand? Not so much. Miss Taylor called Steve up to pass back last week's quiz and when he handed you your paper back, he tried to ignore the big red 65% that was circled at the top left corner of the paper.

He found his way back to his desk, his eyes never leaving your face as you stared at the paper with a pout on your lips. Strands of hair began to fall in your face and Steve wanted to push it back just so he could stare at you a little longer.

“I can help you study,” he said without even realizing it.

You turn to him with surprise on your facial features and smile.

“Really?”

He nods his head, his heart pounding in his chest from how bright your smile was.

“Yeah! We can meet up after school if you want to.”

“You're seriously a lifesaver! Thanks, Steve.”

He never knew how much he loved his name until it came from your mouth. His hands statue to get clammy and his eyes stayed glued to the clock every class period, counting down the hours till he could see you.

-

Now, Steve finds himself wanting to kiss your sadness away all the time now. As you both grew older, his feelings for you grew stronger but for the life of him, he could not read you. He never knew how you felt about him. You'd always hold onto his hand when he walks you home from school, during scary moves you'd cling onto him like a baby koala and hide your face in his side. With all those things and more Steve was positive that you felt the same way about him, that is until he saw you doing those same exact things with Eddie, then Robin, and then Nancy.

Your feelings toward Steve were a mystery and it was a mystery he wanted- no, needed to solve. Now, years later he sits on the stool in front of the computer at Family video listening to your latest rant with Robin.

“It's just weird! Who doesn't like pizza?!”

A chuckle leaves Robin’s mouth as she rewinds tapes that were returned this week.

“Ben doesn't like it apparently.”

You whine and your lips fall into a pout that’s had Steve smitten since the beginning.

“Steve, tell her that pizza is like...the best meal ever.”

He agrees with you, he always does but he decides to side with Robin just so he can see your pout last a little longer.

“I'm afraid I can't. You haven't had the meatloaf my mom makes.”

“Yes, I have, and I still prefer pizza.”

Steve widens his eyes, pretending to be shocked and offended.

“Okay, I'll be sure to let her know then.”

Your mouth opens and streams of protests fly out, but Robin’s beeping watch causes you to stop.

“Well,” she said while pressing a button to make it stop. “That's the end of my shift. You're all good from here?” she asked while looking over at Steve.

“Uh, I should be fine. It's only Wednesday so it shouldn't be too busy.”

Robin nods her head and looks over at you. “You coming or do you wanna ride with Steve?”

Steve misses the way your cheeks get rosy cause he's too busy praying you'll stay and keep him company.

“I'll stay with Steve. Tell your mom I said hi!”

Robin bids you both goodbye and leaves the store in a flash, ready to head home. You turn to Steve with a smile and give him a small wave.

“Hi.”

God, you're so fucking cute. Too cute for your own good Steve thinks.

“Hi, there lovely.”

You're not sure why, but you feel yourself pout as you look at Steve. You lean forward and rest your chin in the palm of your hand.

“Do you call everyone that?”

“No, just you,” he says while copying your relaxing position, you're both face to face, a mere inch being the only thing between you two.

“Just me?”

“Just you. You're special.”

“Do you like me, Steve?”

Steve feels his mouth go dry and his whole body starts to heat up.

“Uh-”

“It's just, everyone is saying you do. Or, at least they're hinting at it.”

“Who is?”

You giggle at his flustered reaction.

“Our friends, Steve.”

Fuck it. He thinks to himself. It's now or never, and god you're pouting again from his lack of answering the questions you're asking him.

“It's okay if you don't. I just assumed-”

He doesn't even give you a chance to finish your sentence before his lips are on yours and Jesus Christ, they're so soft. He's been dreaming of this moment ever since eighth grade, he doesn't count third grade cause the thought of kissing girls made his stomach churn. His hands are on your cheeks, gently stroking your skin and for a moment he forgets where he is. He forgets he's in the middle of his shift, he forgets that he's in a very public setting, and he forgets that you both need to breathe.

You pull away from each other, and the both of you have flushed cheeks and are panting trying to catch your breaths. Steve thinks you look absolutely stunning like this. Your lips are swollen, cheeks red and warm, and you have a dazed look in your eyes.

“You have no idea how long I've been waiting to do that.” he mutters quietly while looking at you with stars in his eyes.

You don't bother to fight the smile that's making its way onto your face as you you'll him back toward you by the collar of his shirt.

“Yeah, tell me about it.”

taglist <3

@cityofidek @spideyjass @simpingoverfictionalppl

[linorangge]

Lee Know as Your Boyfriend ! <3

(keep in mind this is a head canon !) requested by anon 

how you met: 

- minho still liked to attend and give dance lessons every now and then despite already being well versed in his area of expertise

- your first time at the studio happened to be during one of the few lessons he was giving

- you immediately found him v attractive but tried to be focused during the lesson

- after the lesson was over you got the guts to talk to him and ask him for tips

- he was v professional and completely genuine in the advice he was giving u

- like a month went by where you didn’t see him again

- and when u did you asked him for advice on footwork

- he asked if u were new to dancing since he remembered u from last time

- “yes”

- “oh wow I couldn’t tell haha”

- big ego booster on your end lol

- he taught u a few moves and then u guys attended a lesson that was going on at the time

- over time he started to attend the studio more and more often

- u thought maybe because his passion for dancing had grew

- his passion was never-ending, he mostly went to see you

- he taught you the choreo to maniac within the span of a few weeks

- over that time u rlly started hitting it off

- so much that u began to hang out outside of the studio and dancing

- u got to know his personality which u grew fond of 

- u guys went to lots of street food places

- bro was trying so hard to put u on tteokbokki 

- you were v sure he didn’t feel the same 

- until he popped the question out of the blue

- “we should go on a date”

- “HUH”

- “we don't have to if ur not interested”

- “nono! im interested”

- a day was set

- and after a few more dates

- he asked you to be his girlfriend at a book store in samseong-dong

lee know as your boyfriend:

- lots of playful teasing

- loves to annoy you

- it’s hard to stay mad at him when he annoys u enough

- he loves making you laugh until you cry

- loves seeing you smile

- he’ll do literally ANYTHING to make you happy

- very passionate about your relationship

- he’s not v expressive thru his words

- still v affectionate 

- gives tight hugs especially when he greets u

- kisses ur hair a lot?

- he has the tendency to push ur hair behind ur ears when ur talking

- uses pics of soonie doongie and dori as reaction pics when u text

- such a hard ass emoji user pls

- “im gonna pick up lunch 🍱 do u want anything ? 😘😋”

- “no thx babe enjoy ur meal :)”

- “ok 👍 love u bebi ❤️🫂”

- AUGHHHH minho best bf

- pet names…. baby(or bebi/bb), honey, bun

- the type to pull up to ur place randomly

- if u were to give him a key he’d let himself in and just chill there until u got home

- so unserious jfc

- when u need him to be tho he’ll straighten up

- when u need to sit down and talk he’ll be so attentive

- will give u his full 100% attention if u ask for it

- strokes the back of ur hand when ur feeling nervous

- omg pda…

- not v into it

- most is the reg hand holding and subtle hugging

- in private… back hugs r often his fav excuse to be constantly touching u

- for sure the clingy boyfriend in priv

- ass slaps ofc

- not even subtle either

- literally winds it up and makes a show of it

- at some point u got so used to it you just let him instead of dodging

- skz think ur v much his perfect much

- when u go out with minho and the members it’s like the energy in the room is somehow heightened

- they see the way he’s become slower to anger/irritate

- he’s more tolerant

- skz love him either way but you walking into his life was for sure a plus

the first time i love you was said:

- you said it first

- you went on a week trip to a fishing resort with his parents and him

- in short u left a good impression

- on the last two days of the trip u went back to minho’s childhood home to meet soonie doongie and dori

- minho and u were playing w them

- giving treats, playing with them, showing off tricks

- soonie was half asleep in your lap, and u were stroking his fur

- lino was putting on a show of holding dori and pretending to talk to u thru her

- “ur so pretty y/n”

- and then lino turned dori to face him

- “i totally agree dori ur so right”

- u laughed softly before saying it

- “i love you”

- and he turned to you kinda surprised

- “me or her?” (in reference to dori)

- “you, dummy”

- “oh… i love you too baby :)”

- and then he put dori down and leaned in to give u a long kiss

- this might be extra long

- but it’s bc he’s my bias (like no one could tell)

- almost all the members have been requested :)

- thx for the asks, i’ll get to them when i can :)

- luv u bye

[crankynewt]

Good for a Weekend (Helmut Zemo)

Masterlist

Summary: You were retired, a disgraced Avenger content living the rest of their life out in solitude. But Sam and Bucky's shenanigans dragged you back into the hero life and you found yourself face to face with the man who'd got you into this mess in the first place. The question is, however, is he really who you thought he was? Or are you just as crazy as him?

Pairing: Helmut Zemo x Reader

Warnings: TFAWS Episode 3 Spoilers, Zemo (he's a warning), swearing, mentions of torture and experimenting (past), drinking, Zemo being semi-protective, I think that's it??

Word Count: 3.41k

Author's Note: Biting the bullet and writing this BEFORE Marvel does something to get us to hate him again. Also, ZEMO AND BLANK SPACE WORK SO WELL TOGETHER OMG.

“You’ve got to be shitting me.” You murmured, looking at the message from Sam flashing across your phone. Although you had stopped dead in your tracks, the chaos of the bustling streets of London continued around you. You pushed your sunglasses further up your nose, them having fallen down as you were peering at the screen of your burner cell.

‘Need your help in Madripoor ASAP,’ the text read. You weren’t daft, you knew exactly what kind of lawless entropy happened on that Indonesian island and if Sam was asking for your help, that meant he was in some deep shit.

‘I’m retired,’ you replied, glancing over your shoulder out of habit. Although you’d been pardoned after the Berlin incident by the government, you were still a disgraced Avenger in the eyes of the world. All you wanted was to live the rest of your life out in peace, a future without the world-saving you began when you left HYDRA with the Maximoff twins.

You hadn’t chosen to become a human lab rat, tortured and exposed to the mind stone until you could suddenly hear the thoughts of others in your head. Telepathy and telekinesis were not necessarily the kind of special skills that employers wanted to see on a resume, but alas, here you were. Thankfully, however, you'd learned to block them out until necessary to violate people's privacy. Fighting aliens and other superpowered entities, including the people you’d once considered to be your family, were in the past.

‘Please. It’s Bucky,’ Sam messaged again. Those three words were enough to make your blood run cold and your heart stop. Bucky was the reason you were in this mess in the first place, and you would be damned if the ex-assassin was going to fall back into the clutches of evil.

With a sigh, you typed back ‘fine’ and began the trek towards your apartment. Your phone was vibrating again immediately, Sam explaining that they would be picking you up at a small airstrip on the edge of the city.

Three hours later, you were walking along a long, concrete runway, the harsh England wind attacking your body as you pulled your leather jacket tighter around you. Your brows furrowed in confusion at the sight of a civilian jet rather than the military-esque vessels you’d become accustomed to. The steps were awaiting your ascent with an older man stood adjacent to the entrance.

“Ms.(Y/L/N),” he greeted. A thick accent laced his tone, one you couldn’t quite determine from the crackling of age in his voice. German or Russian, most likely, you deduced. Attempting to be polite despite your skepticism, you gave him a tight-lipped smile and handshake before the elder man gestured towards the stairs for you. Entering the jet, you turned right to be met with the familiar faces of Sam and Bucky.

“(Y/N)!” Bucky exclaimed, rising from his seat and embracing you in a hug. He held you tightly against his body, almost as if he wasn’t sure you were really there. The super soldier had taken a liking to you when the two of you stayed in Wakanda during your exile, both of you having a certain understanding of the other due to your shared experiences with HYDRA. The sergeant had become somewhat of a brother to you in your time away together. “What are you doing here?”

“Sam messaged me.” You replied, Barnes’ arms immediately releasing you as he whipped around to face Sam.

“You tattled on me to (Y/N)?” He scoffed. If looks could kill, Sam would have dropped dead from the darkness in Bucky’s orbs.

“Wait, if he’s okay then what am I here for?” You said, shifting your gaze to Sam as you raised a brow.

“You’re here to make sure that he stays in line.” Sam snapped, crossing his arms over his chest as Bucky let out an exasperated ‘Jesus Christ’ under his breath.

“Bucky’s fine, Sam.” You replied, rubbing your face with your hand in annoyance as you glanced at the super-soldier.

“He’s not talking about James.” A new voice sounded from behind you, one both vaguely familiar but also strange. Whipping around, you were met with a face you’d only ever seen through a screen. Zemo.

“What the fuck is he doing out of prison?!” You exclaimed, looking between Sam and Bucky in utter disbelief.

“Bucky broke him out of jail!” Sam exclaimed, pointing a finger towards the super-soldier.

“Sam’s the one who pulled me into this mess!” Bucky pointed back.

“You two morons have reached a whole new level of dumbassery!” You exclaimed, keeping a cautious gaze on Zemo in the corner of your eye. “You broke out the man who ripped apart the Avengers out of jail and you let him do it?! The same man who killed King T’Chaka! Do neither of you remember what T’Challa and the people of Wakanda just did for us after we became enemies of the state?! I cannot believe that you would betray their trust and help this monster to escape!”

You paused for a moment, breathing heavily as you looked at the ashamed faces of Bucky and Sam in front of you.

“I’m sorry to-” You heard Zemo begin, you turned to face him with utter rage shining in your eyes. “No! The grown-ups are talking, you can wait your turn.” You scolded him, almost as you would a child but just a tad harsher. Grown-ups may have also not have been the best choice of words to describe Wilson and Barnes.

“I don’t want any part of this suicide mission!” You snapped at the duo, moving to leave.

Thirty minutes later, however, you were still on the jet, glaring into a pair of brown eyes as the four of you flew through the air. Honestly, you couldn’t believe you were still there, but Sam and Bucky knew you too well and pushed just the right buttons to convince you to stay. Sam needed you to tap into Zemo’s mind if need be to figure out if he was planning on betraying them, and you didn’t want two of the last people you trust getting themselves killed if you could prevent it.

Tweedle-dee and Tweedle-dum were sitting across from each other, meaning that you got stuck sitting across from the Baron in silence. He shifted uncomfortably under your gaze, the darkness in your (Y/E/C) orbs not sitting well with the man.

“So, you read minds.” He began, rubbing his hands together anxiously. You noted the nervous tick and couldn’t help but feel amused at his discomfort, but your expression never faltered.

“You don’t need to make small talk.” You bit, your icy tone growing colder in every syllable.

“I’m genuinely curious, is all.” He began, pausing his fiddling to brush his hair back only to resume it once more. “It just seems like for someone with your abilities, you’re often an overlooked member of the team. You’re the most powerful, even more so than Maximoff or Banner, perhaps, yet you were never truly an Avenger, were you?”

“It doesn’t matter, I’m retired.” You muttered, ending your glaring to gaze out the window. The way Zemo spoke about you was unsettling, especially considering how he felt about the Avengers. He seemed not to think that you were part of the team, similarly to Bucky, and that brought you a feeling of unease.

“And why is that?” Zemo pushed, your avoidance evidence that he’d struck a chord.

“Why do you care?” You scoffed, looking back at the Sokovian man, both annoyance and exhaustion present in your tone.

“Because I think you’re like me.” He answered, his tone becoming quieter. Zemo didn’t look at you with the same rage you’d seen in footage from 2016, nor with the amusement that he gazed at Bucky and Sam with. No, it was something different, softer and analytical, perhaps. You wanted to peer into his mind for something, anything to figure out what he was thinking, but he would likely feel your prodding into his consciousness. As of now, he didn’t seem to have any plans to betray you guys, and you wouldn’t be the one to give him a reason.

“That’s enough from you.” Bucky interrupted, rising from his seat to switch places with you, his brotherly possessiveness clear as day.

The rest of the flight was uneventful, and Zemo provided the three of you with costumes for the roles you were to play in Madripoor. Yours seemed to have been designed specifically to be horribly uncomfortable, both in feel and the amount of skin that was exposed in the cool evening air. The three of you were making your way towards the glowing city shining in the distance, the nerves in your stomach rising with each step.

“Only an American would assume a fashion-forward Black man looks like a pimp.” Zemo explained in response to Sam’s protests over his own outfit. “You look exactly like the man you’re supposed to be playing. The sophisticated, charming African rake named Conrad Mack, aka the Smiling Tiger.”

“He even has a bad nickname.” Sam said, looking at the picture of Conrad on the phone Zemo had just handed him. “Hell, he does look like me though.”

“And who am I supposed to be playing, exactly?” You questioned, still unsure as to what role you would be playing in this scheme.

“My partner,” Zemo said simply, an amused smile working his way onto his lips.

“What?! No! Nu-uh, I’m not doing that!” You protested, Sam chuckling at your denial of what was probably inevitable.

“Would you rather the alternative of all of us getting slaughtered the second we step foot into the city?” Zemo retorted, still humored by your resistance.

“Fine, but if you try anything I’m going to break your nose.” You gave in.

"I wouldn't expect anything less."

Soon, the four of you were making your way into a bar, Helmut’s arm wrapped tightly around your waist since the second you exited the car in a mock possessiveness. It was all part of the charade, you had to remind yourself, as the Baron kept your side pressed against his snugly.

Making your way up to the counter, the bartender didn’t look impressed to see the group of you there as he made his way over to you.

“Hello,” He began. “Wasn’t expecting you, Smiling Tiger.”

“His plans changed. We have a business to do, with Selby.” Zemo interjected before Sam could respond.

“The usual?” The bartender ignored Zemo and turned his attention back to Sam, who simply gave a curt nod in response. The bartender turned, grabbing a snake from a jar and slicing it down the underside with a blade. A part of you wanted to cackle, especially seeing Sam stiffen beside you, and you didn’t doubt that Bucky was having to restrain himself as well. Zemo didn’t seem surprised as the bartender pulled who knows what out from the snake and placed it into a glass.

“Smiling Tiger, your favorite.” The Baron commented, the bartender sliding Sam his beverage only to pour two glasses of a different liquor for Zemo and yourself.

“I love these,” Sam said, raising to clink glasses with yourself and the Sokovian man whose arm was still draped around you.

“Cheers, Conrad,” Zemo replied, smiling back at poor Sam. The three of you downed your burning liquor, Sam struggling the most out of the three of you, clearly appalled by the organ at the bottom of his shot. You could see Bucky give a little nod in the corner of your eye, knowing he must be finding this as amusing as you were.

A man soon approached Helmut from behind, tapping him on the shoulder before he turned to face the stranger, shifting you with him. When Zemo felt the little nudge, he immediately pulled you closer to him. You were even tighter against him now, so much so that you had to wrap an arm around him as well to stabilize yourself. It was almost as if he was trying to shield you from the man despite him knowing full well that you can hold your own.

“I got word from on high; you ain’t welcome here.” He spat, getting too close to the two of you for either of your likings. But Zemo kept his air of indifference while you instinctually moved closer into his side. It’s all an act, remember? You have to play the part of the clingy partner who would get frightened at such a rough man threatening you two. Or at least, that’s what you told yourself.

“I have no business with the Power Broker, but if he insists, he can either come and talk to me…” Zemo began, trailing off as he gestured to Bucky.

“New haircut?” The strange man asked Bucky, who merely glowered in response.

“Or bring Selby for a chat.” Zemo finished, this time him being the one to get into the man’s face. Thankfully that was enough to send him away, most likely to Selby or this Power Broker who seems to be Madripoor’s own version of Big Brother.

You could feel Zemo let out a breath that you don’t think he even knew he was holding, giving a quick glance down at you before placing a peck on your temple. For the facade, of course. But what wasn’t fake were the butterflies rise in your stomach, something that you hadn’t felt in a long time. Were you… Flustered?

No, you reminded yourself internally. This was a very bad man holding you close, the same one who killed the former King of Wakanda and ripped your team to shreds. Not only that, but he hated all the Avengers, so why did he seem to like you? It doesn’t matter whether or not he likes you, he’s Zemo. But the more time you spent with him, the more intoxicated you became. He was starting to look more and more like your next mistake, and love is certainly not a game you wanted to be playing with him. Right?

The next thirty or so minutes were a blur. Bucky having to fake being the Winter Soldier to kick a bunch of men’s asses to finally meeting up with Selby, only for Sam to break your cover through a phone call and Selby quickly being shot. The four of you promptly exited the bar, attempting to remain inconspicuous until bounty hunters from all around started shooting at you. Bucky and Sam jumped forward, meanwhile, Zemo darted to the right, dragging you with him as he moved his hand from your waist to interlock your fingers.

You cut through alleyway after alleyway, hiding in the shadows as gunfire echoed around you. Eventually, you managed to catch up with Bucky and Sam, approaching the pair with your hand still in his.

“Well this is too perfect.” A female voice interrupted your mini-reunion, Sharon Carter emerging from the shadows as she ripped down her hood, gun fixated on Zemo.

“Drop it Zemo,” She started, Zemo raising his gun-holding hand before lowering the weapon to the ground. “You cost me everything.”

“Sharon, wait.” You reasoned, raising your hand as you slowly backed up.

“What, are you his lover now? His sugar baby or some shit?” She badgered you, causing your eyes to widen as you only just remembered that you were still holding his hand. You quickly dropped it, raising it to match your other arm as Zemo sent you a look that you couldn’t decipher. Oh, how desperately you wanted to look into his mind, but the little bit of sanity left in you told you to leave it be.

“Someone recreated the super-soldier serum and Zemo had a lead,” Sam explained.

“That explains why you guys are here. And Selby’s dead.” Sharon replied, gun still pointed at your group.

“So what are you doing here?” Bucky questioned the blonde.

“I stole Steve’s shield, remember? I also took the wings for your ass so that you could save his ass from his ass and became a criminal with their ass.” She explained, pointing the gun at each mention of whoever's ass it was that turn. “Unlike you, I didn’t have the Avengers to back me up, so, I’m off the grid in Madripoor.”

“Hey, don’t blow that smoke. I was on the run, too.” Sam rebutted Sharon’s complaints.

“Was. Is. Big difference. I don’t speak to my family anymore - I can’t. My own father doesn’t know where I am.”

“Listen…” You began. “Sharon, we need your help, the former agent only laughing in response. “Please.”

“This isn’t over.” She conceded, shaking her head at you. “I have a place in High Town, you should be safe there for a while.”

Sharon’s place was definitely nicer than yours is now, and you’re not even on the run anymore. She, thankfully, had a change of clothes for you to slip into, the soft material much a welcome relief from the tortuous item Zemo had you wearing.

While you were waiting for Sharon’s guests to begin arriving for whatever event would soon be taking place downstairs, everybody slowly filtered out of the room until it was only Zemo and yourself remaining.

“Can I ask you a question?” You spoke up, breaking the silence from your spot on the sofa as you glanced towards the Baron seated across the room.

“Ask away.” He smiled, taking a sip from the amber liquid in his glass.

“What did you mean earlier, when you said we were the same.” Your voice was quiet now, so much so that you weren’t sure if he’d even heard you. That is until he got up from his seat and slowly walked towards you.

“I never wanted to tear the Avengers apart, not until they killed my family. Destroyed my city… Sure, I didn’t like them, but I didn’t want to destroy them. It was all about vengeance.” He began, sitting beside you on the yellow fabric. “For you, it was HYDRA who ruined your life. You joined the Avengers because it was where the last people you had left were going and it was the easiest way for you to ensure the organization was destroyed. You never wanted the idolization that came with being a hero, and it was clear when your work was done that you had no desire to keep going. Everything that came after the Sokovia Accords was out of survival.”

“I’m not saying you're right,” you began, “but what would that make me, then? Insane? Cause that seems to be the running theory.”

“You’re not crazy, despite how rumors fly. Neither am I, really.” He began, eliciting a small smile from you at the last bit he added. “You’re a fighter, someone doing whatever it takes to get their agenda done. Whether that means breaking the law or joining the Avengers, nothing will stop you once you put your mind to it - it’s one of the things I admire about you.”

You pursed your lips as you focused on the amber fluid floating in its crystalline home, him taking another sip of the burning liquid. Your gaze shifted back to his face, and oh god, look at that face. Maybe it was the liquor in your system already or maybe your last bit of sanity was finally escaping your mind, but suddenly his past didn’t seem to matter anymore. You had plenty of red on your ledger as well, and the more he spoke the more you began to sympathize with him.

“So you admire me?” You smirked, crossing your arms as you tilted your head slightly to the right playfully.

“Why don’t you look into my mind and tell me?” He replied. Reaching out, you gently placed your fingers against his temple as you gazed into his consciousness. Flashes of magic and madness, ideas of a love that could be forever or go down in flames. You didn’t go searching deeper, because your own mind was racing. Would pursuing this be worth all the pain that could very well follow? No, not could, would. You’d be betraying your former teammates, but what did that matter much anymore.

Rather than pulling your hand away, you placed your lips gently on his, tentatively, even. He tasted of expensive liquor and a hint of peppermint, and you found yourself intoxicated. The kiss ended far too soon for your liking, him pulling away so his brown orbs could gaze into your own.

“So… What do you say?” He asked, cupping your cheek in his hand, you place your own over top of his.

“Why not?” You smiled back, reconnecting your lips to his.

“I can make the bad guys good for a weekend.”

Taglist:

@fanfictionedagain @lam-ila @b0nnyzz @haydieenzzibug @cyanide-mustard @duchess-of-new-shire @the-chocoholic-writer @milenadixon @real-fbi @golddenlioness

[a-jynx]

:0 yall are ACTUALLY insane omg- 1,061 of you guys like my stuff??? im so thankful for you all and i hope my future works get as much love <33

also how should we celebrate 1K?? i genuinely have no thought behind it, so if there's something you guys would want to see lemme know !! without further ado; how the DSMP introduce you on stream; [dream team + others]

~~~~

Dream; - this mf doesn't have a face-cam but he does have a mic, so chat 100% heard you come in laughing about a TikTok - "babe-" - he's never jumped so high or muted himself so quickly, but chat was already flying with questions and you couldn't help but feel relief as you guys had been dating for months and you could keep it a secret for so long... - "do you want to come out about our relationship? i don't want you to be bombarded with questions and shit," "we'd have to tell them sometime, bubs," - after getting your approval, he'd unmute and start to introduce you; "okay, chat, uh... Yes, someone came in, yes they called me babe, and yes i am dating someone - sorry simps - this is Y/N, my partner, and I want you guys to show them love and respect since I love them-" "more than George?" - dream glared at you before rolling his eyes, mumbling "you're an idiot" under his breath - oh, and let's just say you guys were trending for a few days <3

Sapnap; - it was definitely during his shock stream (yes, im holding onto the stream for as long as i live) - he forgot to tell you - which doesn't seem possible, but he was busy trying to get dream to fix up the shock collar - "hey bubs what're you-" - once again he's never jumped that high before but he whipped around and stared at you, as you stared back at him before slowly - trying - to lower your voice - "you're streaming-" "i've been streaming for the past hour - how have you not heard me?!" "i've been gone, dickhead!" his mic definitely picked up all of that and there will be clips all over TikTok, so have fun finding those on your fyp ! - he would pause everything before stepping to the side, holding you and whispering (he remembered to mute) - "do you wanna meet them? i know my chat's already freaking out" "you do have some crazy fans babe.. but what's the harm in getting it done..?" -he brought you over, holding you in his lap, and began to answer all of the questions flying in 'how long have you been dating?' 'did you both move in with dream?' 'do we know them somehow??' a lot of questions that lowkey took over the stream but Sap was thankful - dream was being a dick with the cheap jumpscares - "i think that went well," and would you look at that? trendinggg~

George; - that little door that's always closed?? yeah, you opened it and came from there - you lowkey scared the shit out of him since he just saw it from the corner of his eye - "oh my god, Y/N what the hell-" - ayo this boy would actually yell at you to get out or something, but we both know you won't <3 -"okay, rude, i literally came to ask what you wanted to get for dinner" "yeah, and I'm streaming???" "yeah, i know, i can see that- oh you're streaming..." - you both would just stare at each other and would be so confused on what to do - i mean, they've seen you but like... are you guys ready to put your relationship out there? - George would end the stream, not bothering with a goodbye or anything since this was a big thing for you guys - and after discussing it over some take-out, you guys both posted a couple photos on both of your Twitters :)

Quackity; - o m g; he'd just laugh because you looked terrified but then he'd mute and step aside to hug you - he wouldn't know what to do at first; he obviously comforted you first but he had no real idea of how to approach this since he wanted to keep at least a little bit of his life hidden - would ignore it; donos turned off, any questions in bits he skipped over, and of course any questions in chat he ignored - he wouldn't want to pressure you into showing off your relationship when you both agreed to keep it out of your social media lives - ofc the questions would get a lot and if the fans found your socials, they'd spam you asking - finally, Q posted a photo on his Instagram story with him pressing a long kiss to your cheek with the caption 'mi vida'

Wilbur; - he'd watch you come in from his camera - definitely was too late for him to be streaming </3 - "hello, love bug.. did I wake you?" pls he'd be so sweet about accidentally waking you or something before turning his chair towards you, opening his arms - cradling you close, he'd go back to his stream, ignoring the flying by questions, going back to what the conversation was about until he pressed a few kisses to your hair, rubbing his thumb against your shoulder - "yes, chat, this is my significant other, and you can see they're sleepy, so it's going to be a bit quieter," - would ask for screenshots and clips because a) you'd been wanting a new home screen b) he knew you looked cute c) he wanted to gush about you and now was a perfect time- - "oh, chat, that reminds me of the time Y/N did-" and would tell the story; bragging about you came easy to that simp

Karl; - it 100% would be because you wanted to join </3 - probably during a JackBox game with his friends, and they looked like they were having fun - plus Karl mentioned wanting to come forward with your relationship when he noticed that everyone kept pointing out how all of Mr. Beast crew had significant others - his face would literally go :0 to :D so quickly because he noticed it was you - "baby?? did you need something??" "yeah, i wanna join :((" - his heart would explode because of perfect timing?? - "perfect ! Chat, this is-" he'd paused and pull you into the cameras' view with a giggle and pressing small kisses to your cheek as you laughed as well, slouching into his chest as he tried to read chat "this is my lovely, adorable partner Y/N!! - you'd laugh and wave before he unmuted in-game and announced you were wanting to play, which everyone agreed because you were so sweet?? and your answers were top-notch like omg

~~~~

hello, helloooo~

exciting news, i got a new job !! i went shadowing and paperwork today, so my first official day is Monday, so posts will be a little slower as I am now working full-time! I will try and get more stuff out and I hope it still gets all the love <3

Until tomorrow, I hope you have a beautiful day ~ J

[thereaderinsertlady]

OKAY OKAY OKAY DON'T EVEN GET ME STARTED ON THE VIDEO GAME JESTERS-- DIMENTIO, MARX, JEVIL, AND EEESPECIALLY JOKA ARE ALL EXTREMELY UNDER-FUCKIN-RATED CHARACTERS. DIMENTIO? HAS LIKE 5 READER INSERTS. JEVIL? HAS MAYBE 30. MARX? MAYBE 3. MAYBE. AND THEN JOKA LITERALLY HAS NONE. LIKE, ZERO READER INSERT FANFICS. HE'S THE CUTEST MF OUT OF THE JESTERS, AND THERE IS ABSOLUTELY NO FUCKING READER INSERTS OF HIM. READER INSERT LADY YOU'VE GOOOTTA HELP ME OUT HERE PLSPLSPLS--

Omg I love all the video game jesters sososo much. Joka and Dimentio easily make it on my top 20 most favorite character list. I love Marx and Jevil as well, but not as much as Joka and Dimmy. (Still adore Marx and Jevil tho 💞). I've been starving for content tooooo 🥺 If anyone wanted to get me a Valentine's Day present, a reader insert fic or drawing of Joka or Dimmy would make my world.

I definitely would have written something for all the jesters for you, anon, but I've been working so hard on all the Valentine's Day gifts, I just don't have time for it. So, nothing for you... is what I WOULD say, if I didn’t care about each and every one of you suckers! So have some headcanons ya turkey, and happy early Valentine's Day!

Marx x Reader Headcanons

Marx absolutely adored you when he first met you. It was something about your personality that made him so incredibly attracted. The way you talked to others— even the way you walked around just made his little heart flutter.

He wasn't nervous to talk to you, not at all. He was able to easily have a long conversation with you, and he was able to play a few games as well! He really liked playing games and having fun with you.

He often has dreams about you as well. Very detailed dreams, and he managed to remember every single last one of them. Even just thinking about one of the dreams makes his heart pound!

When he confessed his affection towards you, he was very... cheesy about it. However, you didn’t seem to mind. You didn’t mind at all... That only made him even more attracted to you.

Maybe a year after you two got together, he began to spill some of his... more darker and secretive thoughts. He honestly believed that you'd think of him to be some psychopath, but surprisingly, you still didn’t seem to care! You even seem to encourage his 'naughty' behavior!

"Mhm, and how would you kill these people? Would you kill them quickly, like... slice open their throat? Or would you rather torture them first?"

Marx knew he liked you when he first met you.

Jevil x Reader Headcanons

Oh you were just so cute, cute! As you talked with Jevil more and more, he thought you looked more and more cuter. It was an endless cycle, but this is one that he didn’t mind!

Jevil wasn't obvious about the fact that he liked you (or so he thought), but one day you came up to him and boldly asked;

"Do you love me, Jevil?"

In that moment, he was extremely tempted to say no just so he could see your reaction, but he managed to answer honestly.

"Of course, of course! Why wouldn't I love a cute face like yours?"

Ever since that day happened, you and him have been on several dates. Jevil's most favorite date was when you two headed to the famous milkshake shop in the city. In typical romantic fashion, you two shared a milkshake. However, that wasn't his favorite part about the date, oh, most certainly not! His most favorite part was when he gave a... 'polite' smile to a person that was staring straight at you two, and they ran away! You asked him what was so funny, but he couldn't stop laughing!

Now, whenever you two hang out in public, he keeps his tail wrapped around either your wrist or your thigh, just to let everyone know that you belonged— err, that you were with him!

Dimentio x Reader Headcanons

Like a bee to a spring flower, Dimentio liked hanging around you. He hasn't felt this way towards anyone else, so needless to say, he didn’t know what the feeling was at first. Oh, but soon enough, he found out what it was. And certainly not because he read Mimi's diary, oh most certainly not because of that!

...Anyways, he had to learn more about you. So, with that in mind, he decided to snoop around a little, and kept a good eye on you. However, while he was... keeping a good eye on you, you ended up catching him.

"Why are you stalking me?" You said with a pout, walking up to him.

Dimentio gave a sly chuckle. "I am not stalking you! Rather, I am simply... observing you."

"Mhm. Well, while you're doing that, can you do me a favor and change the light bulb in the fridge?"

"Why of course!" He grinned, and went over to the fridge... only to find that the light bulb didn't need to be changed. Instead, there was a note, aaand that note revealed your true feelings for him. Hm. Is this what embarrassment feels like? Oh, but it was sweeter than embarrassment, like the frosting on a cupcake... Ah, he was blushing.

After that... ahem, delightful event, you and him went on a dinner date of sorts, which went swimmingly. That date led to another date, and then another, and then another, and... You grew incredibly comfortable with him as time went on, and now a date would be considered as a movie night on the couch at your place with you in nothing but a pair of underwear... not that he minded, of course.

Joka x Reader Headcan... wait a minute, this isn't a headcanon!

That's right, this isn't a headcanon at all! Despite being balls deep in Valentine's Day asks, the Reader Insert Lady manages to create what is (probably) the first ever Joka x Reader oneshot! Here's the link for it on ao3. It may not be the best piece of fiction, nor the longest, but damn it, it's something! Us Joka lovers shall go hungry no longer! And now, we can finally say that yes, there is a reader insert fanfic of Joka! So, without further ado:

Joka x Reader - Red Teeth

“Hey, um... I like your red teeth.”

Joka blinked once, twice, before slowly squinting at you. “Wh... What?”

A few months have passed since the death of Ghadius, as well as Joka’s own near-death experience. He received a multitude of grievous wounds from a... certain battle, and he really didn’t expect to make it out alive. However, he didn’t escape death without a small price, unfortunately. He received a few more than uncanny scars, and his face had several ‘cracks’ that were unsightly to the eyes. Right now, though, he was heading into town to go to the grocery store. He wore a long thick cloak that covered most of his body, and he hadn’t expected to come across anyone on his way there. It was... oddly domestic of him, in all honesty. He never thought he’d be here, getting groceries of all things, but... here he was, despite losing to those meddling brats—

“I like your, uh, your red teeth,” you repeated, likely figuring that he didn’t hear you the first time. After another short pause, you gave a weak smile. “I think they look nice.”

Joka stared at you for a moment longer before what you said fully registered to him. “You... You WHAT?! But... you know who I am, right?” He said, starting to get a bit anxious.  

When Ghadius was still alive, Joka would be beaming with confidence, but... as of right now?  

Joka took a step back as he pulled the hood of his cloak more over his face, readying himself for... for whatever you had planned. Nobody would ever say anything like that to him, especially after what happened. And, since you saw his red teeth, you must have recognized who he was. Was this some... some ploy to distract him, perhaps? Because if it was, he wasn’t gonna fall for—

“Yeah, I... know who you are.”

His tail flicked against the ground nervously, and he took another step back. “Oh yeah?” He said, swallowing hard. “Well... go on! Whatchu gonna do about it? Are... Are ya gonna pull out a-a-a knife, and dice me up like some freshly picked tomatoes?!”

You frowned, and immediately shook your head. “No, of course not!”

Joka... scoffed as he crossed his arms. “Well, what are ya gonna do?” A brief moment of silence passed, and he tapped his foot against the ground, trying to keep up his semi-confident charade up. “C’mon, get on with it! Don’t keep me waiting— I haven’t got all day!”

Your frown deepened. “I’m not going to hurt you...”

Joka gave you a wary look. “Oh yeah? Prove it!”

...Slowly, you pursed your lips while furrowing your brow. “How can I prove to you that I won’t hurt you?”

…

...Joka shrugged.  

You lightly huffed. “That’s not very helpful.”

He grunted loudly. “You’re not helpin’ your case here, brat!”

“I just don’t know what to do! Should I... get you some flowers, or something? Do you like flowers?”

He scoffed. “You think I would like some flowers?!”

“Would you?!”  

...Joka paused, rubbing his chin as he thought about it. “Actually, I guess I wouldn’t mind gettin' some flowers. Especially the ones that are more expensive.”

You softly pouted, folding your arms across your chest. “Well... too bad! I’m not getting you any flowers, you... you meanie.”

“Ya just said you would, brat!”

“I-I never said that I would, I just asked if I should!”

Joka lightly growled as a surge of anger pulsed through him, before stomping up to you. He stopped maybe a few inches away from you, and jabbed your chest with his index finger as he spoke. “Why, you little brat! First, you come up to me completely out of the blue, then you try to prove your innocence, and nooow you do this?! Why I outta, outta...”

Joka noticed the tears building in the corner of your eyes, and to him, that felt like a punch to the gut. Guilt immediately engulfed him, and he thought about the conversation that occurred so far... Okay, so maaaybe you weren’t trying to kill him... Whoops.

With a wince, he looked off to the side. “I... sorry, I... I didn’t mean to... to...”

“I-It’s okay,” you mumbled, rubbing at your wet eyes. “I just get upset easily when people yell... It’s not your fault.” Somehow, that only made him feel worse about his response. He... sighed, and handed a handkerchief over to you. “Thanks,” you said quietly, before drying your eyes.

“Look, brat— err, kid. I really didn’t mean ta make you upset like that. So, how about ya accept my apology, and we part ways, alright?”

You frowned. “Part ways?”

“Well, after what I said... I assume you don’t wanna be around me anymore.”

...Slowly, you looked off to the side, chewing your bottom lip.

Joka stared at you in disbelief. “You... You still want to be around me, even after what I said?” He whispered, watching as you nodded in agreement... “Why?”

“...Do I need a reason?” You said quietly, looking back over to him. Your eyes were a little red, but you’ve mostly calmed down by now.

“Everything has a reason! Just why in the world would ya wanna hang around someone who has yelled at ya?!”

A few seconds ticked by, and... a soft smile gradually appeared on your face. “Because I like your red teeth.”

Joka continued to stare at you in disbelief. “But... But why?! Do you not see my face good enough? Well here— look at me!” He hissed, before yanking his hood off, revealing the several ‘cracks’ running along his face. “I... I’m hideous!”

A frown once again appeared on your face, and you leaned forwards to wipe his... tears? With the handkerchief he gave you earlier. “You’re not hideous,” you said softly. “Sure, you may not look the way you want to, but... you can’t help that. I used to think the same way about myself, but... I learned to like myself the way I am.”

Joka stayed silent for a long moment, looking at you with uncertainty in his gaze. However, he eventually took your wrist into his gloved hand, and gave a somewhat somber chuckle. “Well, it seems like we both have our demons, eh, kid?”

You let him hold your wrist, and with a sigh, you nodded along. “Yeah, I... I suppose so...” You didn’t feel uncomfortable as he continued to hold your wrist, but you still felt the need to change topics before the conversation turned even more sour. “So, um... Where were you heading before I... before I met you?”

Joka blinked a few times, like he wasn’t expecting the question. “Where I was going? Uh, well... I was going to the grocery store.”

...You bit your bottom lip. “The grocery store?”

“Yeah, and— and I see you tryin’ to smile!”

As soon as he said that, a wide grin broke out across your face. “I’m sorry, I just didn’t expect that’s where you were going. It’s so...”

“Domestic?” Joka finished with a huff. “I’ve gotta get somethin’ to eat somehow, kid!”

You covered your mouth with your free hand, trying to hide your giggles. This whole conversation was just... absurd. With a calming exhale, you talked slowly. “And so, you were going to carry all your groceries by yourself, with no help?”

“Well... yes! How else do you expect me to carry everything?”

“Let me help you.”

...Joka slowly squinted at you, furrowing his brow at the sudden offer. “You want to... help me...?”

You nodded. “Yeah, I’d love to help.”

He... really wanted to ask you why you wanted to help, why you wanted to do this for him of all people, but he merely sighed, and pulled up the hood of his cloak back over his head. “Fine, but don’t get mad if you have to carry some heavy stuff!”

Still holding your wrist, Joka led you towards the grocery store, and you followed right behind him, smiling every single step of the way.

[smolweeblets]

Rainy days

Luisa Madrigal x GN reader

A/n: here is fic i promised i actually didnt abandon it omg 😍😍. Okay but seriously im proud off this fic it turned out way better than expected, endings a lil eh but better than nothing hahshsah anyways ill shut up so you can enjoy.

-You first met Luisa when she was getting her door, she was about to get herself a snack when she saw you stuffing yourself with all kinds of food.

-She approached you carefully and tried to start a conversation, something about you made you approachable to her.

”Hey there-”

”Huh-?... O-oh hiya” you greeted sheepishly while wiping sk e crumbs off your face.

“Are you enjoying the party?”

“Yea, I am! You're Luisa right? The one who just got your power?”

“Yep, that's me” She beamed.

“Wow, I'd love to have your powers, I'd beat up all of the bad guys” you said enthusiastically.

“Woah, that's a cool idea, but i have the powers… so maybe you'll be my sidekick and we'll defeat all the bad guys together.”

You let out a gasp and nodded you head excitedly. “That would be so amazing, wanna do that now?” You had stars in your eyes from how excited you were, and you looked at Luisa expectantly.

“Hell yea! follow me we can go play in my room”

-After running over and practically begging your parents for permission, you went on your way and played the night away. This was the start of your blooming friendship.

-You both more or less grew up and did everything together. You frequently helping her with tasks, and her keeping you safe from whatever situation you found yourself in again.

-Luisa was the first one to catch feelings, she noticed them when you were around 13 and she was 12.

-It was a day where you wouldnt really expect rain, where the sun was out and shining one second and the next there's rain that seems to have materialized out of nowhere. So, early on that day Luisa was tasked with doing her jobs, as she usually is.

-The weather was nice and sunny when she went out, a perfect day to work. After a few hours it began to darken, Luisa just brushed it off, not keeping track of time and continued on with her work.

-A light drizzle started and she wasn't very near much shelter, a moment of scanning her environment and she bolts off to the nearest tree.

-It wasn't until she got to the tree that she saw you, also seeking shelter from the sudden drizzle.

-You were previously attempting to climb the tree, and you would have been successful if it weren't for the rain.

“Y/n?”

“Oh! Luisa hi!”

“What are you doing here?”

-You were slightly embarrassed to answer but Luisa was your best friend so you quickly brushed the thought off.

“Eheh, i was trying to climb this tree”

“Huh? Why? I never thought you liked doing stuff like these”

“Well… some boys were being mean and said I couldn't even climb a tree so i went to prove them wrong”

“That wasn't very nice of them, who were they? I'll be sure to teach them a lesson when I see them next time” Luisa was frowning and not happy at all that people were making fun of you.

“Eh it doesn't matter, i dont remember anyways, all that matters is that theyre wrong.” You let out a little “hmph” at the end.

“I would've been successful if it weren't for this rain too”

“Hehe you're right, but man i sure hope this rain doesn't last long, i have stuff to do”

-You look at Luisa, surprised shes still thinking about working in a condition like this. Rain pouring and the skies gray. You decide to ask her why she does all this for no kind of reward in return.

“Hey Luisa, why do you have to work so much-?”

-A moment of silence, or rather a moment of hearing nothing but the rain pattering on the ground.

“Well, I guess I do it for my family and for the town…”

“Don't you ever get tired of helping everyone?” You glance at her, a serious look on your face. “Like, most times i see you now you're doing some form of work, before it was just small tasks but now doesent it get tiring?”

“I-” “well, i suppose i does but if i dont then people will get mad at me”

“Oh man well, try to get them to understand because you get tired too and they need to understand that”

“It- AHH” A large boom of thunder interrupted her answer making her jump and cling on to you.

“Oh my god- Luisa are you okay?” You ask with worry in your voice. The poor girl tries to calm down for a moment, her heart still beating quickly but your voice soothens her temporarily.

-A few seconds of her just clinging to you and trying to gather herself.

“I-im good now, i think” She breathes out as she slowly loosens her grip.

“You scared me there,” You chuckle. “I never would've thought the big and strong Luisa would be scared of some thunder, especially considering your aunts gift”

-She blushes at your teasing, eyes furrowing but her mouth in a crooked smile.

“To be honest ive never really experienced her thunder up close, and when she does its no where as loud as this”

“Huh, I didn't know that '' You shrugged. “Also im not done with the our conversation earlier, you really should take a break someday”

-She sighs defeatedly and her shoulders drop slightly.

“Alright alright, ill ask abuela if i can take a break tomorrow”

-Your mouth curls into a smile, your cheeks lifting up and your eyes twinkle. “hehe good, lets use all that time to have fun” “i say lets go search for bugs, what do you think?”

-No response, but Luisa stares at you for a moment.

-Maybe it was the rain, maybe it was because sitting under a tree huddled together is romantic, or maybe for no reason at all, Luisa stops to think for a moment. To think about you, how much you care for her and all the little things that show it. Frequntly asking her to take breaks, always worrying and always looking out for her even though she was at least ten times stronger than you. It made her heart swell.

-She didn't know why, but she felt like if she was with you she could do anything. She felt like she was even more powerful when you werer by her side.

-Luisa notices only now the extent of your beauty, how your face effortlessly looks so bright and happy, your smile that never fails to make her feel better, the stunning way you wear your hair, the little actions you do when you're feeling a certain emotion. Her gaze on you right now was one of pure love, shes never experienced this feeling before and yet it feels so right, its like from the moment she was born, she was supposed to be doing this, right now with you.

-It hit her like a truck. She was in love, and madly at that. Oh lord she thought.

I'm not ready for this. I dont know how to confess- what is I mess up? what if they only see me as a friend??? what if-

“Hey Luisa, you good? I think you've been zoned out for like 3 minutes now” You checked in as you snapped your fingers at her face.

“O-oh, yeah i'm good i've just been… thinking.”

“Yea, you've been staring at me the entire time” “you got a crush on me or something?”

“Heh as if, only crush i know is me crushing you at racing”

“I'd totally win if you didn't have your gift” Your eyes rolled playfully and you had a grin on your face.

“Know what, i'll race you tomorrow if you've asked your abuela for a break and when the ground is dry”

“Oh you're on, prepare to be beat by the amazing Luisa Madrigal!” Luisa didnt care if you didn't reciprocate her feelings, for now she only cares about being your best friend, and that's more than enough for her. One day she might think of confessing but currently, the only thing she's worrying about is whether or not she'll go easy on you in your race.

A/n .2: if u enjoyed that my reqs are still open give some please 😭🤞

[songbirdsingingthings]

Acceptance - Jean Kirstien x Reader

❀ Back to Navigation ❀ 

DISCLAIMER: I do not own any of these characters, they belong to Hajime Isayama

AOT Masterlist - Main Masterlist

Warnings: Angst, Weapons, Season 4 spoilers

Requested by: Anonymous

Hi! Could you do a one-shot of Jean/Girlfriend. His lover drank the wine and turned into a Titan after Zeke screamed. Then could you show everyone’s reaction and what they decide to do. :D

A/N: Sorry this took a little bit, but I’m really happy with how this turned out! Also had to catch up on the last two episodes that came out (including the one today omg it was so good). I did take some liberties with the second part of your request, as I focused more on Jean’s reaction.  I hope you enjoy and thank you so much for your request!

Word Count: 1.2K

You weren’t one to enjoy alcohol. Usually, you would avoid having even a single glass of wine because you didn’t want to risk the possibility of you being drunk. The thought of being out of your own control in a world that was already so messed up plagued your mind enough to the point that when you and your buddies were passing around a bottle, you’d pass on the opportunity. Plus, the taste of it wasn’t fantastic enough to warrant you actively seeking a sip of the purpley-red liquid.

However, that one night where you wanted to just forget about the fact that your comrades, your family, and your closest friends were six feet under - and you were only nineteen yourself - you found yourself with a flush on your cheeks and a giggle in your throat. It felt so good at the moment, like you were flying in the sky. It was that same adrenaline and completely pleasant feeling that you remembered experiencing when you first mastered using ODM gear; playing hide and seek in the training forests with Connie, Jean, and Sasha. It made you feel like a fifteen year old again. You felt like your old self. Now, it just made you miserable.

The little armband that was affixed to your overcoat did nothing to weigh you down, but you felt like it was constricting your arm. It was hard to process what Commander Pyxis had told you - that the wine you had sipped from was contaminated with Zeke Yeager’s spinal fluid. That the one time, the one instance in which you had let yourself have a drink, it would be the biggest mistake of your life.

At the moment, you were stuck in a cell, swinging your feet on a little stool and trying not to think too hard about what was almost certainly to come within the next few days, maybe in the next few moments. The second that Zeke would yell, it would be over for you. You would transform into the very monster that you had been slaying for the last several years. But, could you really still call them monsters? They were people with lives who had been at the beck and call of Marley. They could have been someone’s Connie, someone’s Sasha. Someone’s Jean… oh god Jean. What would he say when he finds out? Would it be too late, would you have already transformed before you got the chance to say goodbye? And if that did happen, would he even be able to tell if you were a titan? You’d seen it happen before with Armin. A strange, mutated version of the human they once were is projected onto the titan’s face. You almost began to tear up at that possibility - that a gangly titan version of you had your Y/H/C hair, your Y/E/C eyes. A ‘you’ that was so deformed, but still held the characteristics that would prompt someone to say, ‘that’s Y/N’s titan.’

You felt sick. You leant to reach for a bucket, but the locked door that imprisoned you and several others swung open.

“Let’s go, come on. We need you all.” You didn’t bother to look up at the speaker. You were a soldier, and you knew how to follow orders, so you immediately fell into line. A gun was shoved into your hand and there was a pat to your back as you were ushered out of the building and into the usually busy cobblestone streets. A gasp fell from your lips as you looked around you. All over, Marlyeans and Eldians were battling, and in the center of it all, Eren’s titan. That short boy with the raven colored hair that you used to share jokes with and poke fun at, held a stance and stature that felt so wrong. But you didn’t have time to linger or hold onto that thought. Instead, the Beast titan made you freeze in your movements. You couldn’t move, you couldn’t breathe. And yes, while that was part of the titan’s power, this was purely your own body’s actions. An overwhelming fear struck through every one of your nerves that you didn’t notice a Marleyean take aim at you. However, someone else did. In a flurry of movements, Jean killed the man instantly and turned towards you, running as fast as he could. All you could do was watch him. Immediately, Jean gathered you into his arms, clutching and grasping at your arms, your clothes, your hair - like you were water slipping from his hands and he was doing everything he could to keep you there with him.

“Y/N, where the hell have you been, Armin and I have been trying to get everyone of our group back together and you have been the one person to be missing.” He says into your hair, breathing you in and tucking your face into his chest. Again, you find yourself not being able to do anything, so he pulls back to look at you from an arm’s length. “Y/N?”

Your gaze flickers down to your armband and then back to him, which he mimics. You find it truly impressive how many emotions his face shuffles through in one second. Confusion, denial, anger, sadness. He was just missing one to have gone through the whole cycle of grief. Instead, he shook his head.

“No, no. Tell me you didn’t, this has to be a mistake. You hate wine, you hate alcohol in general. It’s probably because you were just with them that they made you wear it.”

“Jean…” you finally croak out, giving him a sad smile and locking your eyes with his. “You… you should go. You need to get away from me. Please.” Pushing him away and backpedaling slowly, you don’t let him out of your sight. He takes a step forward, but your hand goes up. “I don’t want you to be here when this happens, and I don’t think you do either.” His head turns towards the floor, and you know you’ve won. “Hey Jean? Close your eyes for me?” You say, your voice quivering just a bit. He complies. “I love you.” You say, pressing a soft kiss to his lips. And with that, you’re gone, down the road and around the corner. And Zeke let's forth one hell of a scream.

He lets his feet carry him until he’s into a spring, finally moving to use his ODM gear. Jean finds himself on a rooftop with Armin, Mikasa, and Connie. The light explodes all over the crumbling city, and Jean clamps his hands over his ears. He doesn’t want this, he never wanted this. He wanted a life with you in a little cottage. He wanted to be reading a newspaper while your baby was asleep on his chest, their little hand gripping onto the cloth of his shirt. He won’t get that. He will never get that.

“Is that?” Connie exclaims, shock and sadness taking hold of his tone.

“O-oh my god.” Armin says, his hand moving to cover his dropped jaw.

“No…” Mikasa whispered, her eyes wide. Finally, Jean looks to what they had set their eyes on. A tall, strong looking titan. Y/H/C hair was whipping fiercely in the wind. Y/E/C eyes were buried deep in its face. And quickly, just like that kiss you had given him, a soldier had sliced its nape and it collapsed on the broken, cobble street. Jean let forth a breath. Acceptance.

Regular Taglist:

@luluwiie ~ All-Flora Florist

@maiacroson ~ All-Flora Florist

@nerdypuppytimemachine ~ All-Flora Florist

@voilawind ~ All-Flora Florist

@catguinsstuff ~ All-Flora Florist

@smallxbunny ~ All-Flora Florist

[adorerdraco]

Healing Heart ✧ Draco x Reader Mini-Series PART 1

Summary: Draco meets and accidentally falls in love with reader during his sixth year (HBP). Part 1 of a upcoming series.

Warnings: angst, some fluff, mentions of blood, crying, panic attacks

Words: 6.4K words (I made this so longgg)

A/N: my first Draco writing !!! i am sorry ahead of time if there are any misspellings, typing with long acrylics is hard omg. ALSO PLEASE FEEL FREE TO SEND ME REQUESTS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! also i do not own this gif.

It was almost satirical how Draco managed to fall in love with someone at what might be, is, the lowest point in his life. It was his sixth year at Hogwarts, the dark mark burned into his left forearm, the restless mending of the vanishing cabinet, the impossible task of killing his Headmaster, the Dark Lord looming over him and his family with promises of torture and death if he didn’t follow through with the orders he was given.

Draco was an empty shell of what he used to be. The playful and mean remarks that would leave his mouth to anyone that stood in his path were gone. The devious twinkle in his eye and the smug smirk that used to grace his face almost 24/7 was reduced to a permanent scowl and red-rimmed eyes. He looked as if he had aged a rough 10 years since the last year he was at school. Everyone noticed it.

Everyone noticed the skipped meals, the lack of sleep, the empty look in his eyes, the falling behind in class. But no one dared say a thing to him. It almost seems as though people were afraid of him now more than ever. The sneer on his face and the reckless and impulsive attitude he held now was like a repellent for anyone that tried to come near. He was completely alone, whether he liked it or not and he decided to keep it that way.

That all changed a few months into the year, however, when you were rushing to DADA, your long house colored scarf getting tangled underneath your feet causing you to trip and lurch forward, dropping all your books, your wand, and crashing into, you guessed it, Draco Malfoy himself. There was a loud cracking sound as you both tumbled onto the ground, a yelp slipping past Draco’s lips as he held his hand in pain.

"Oh, Merlin,” you gasped, Draco shooting you the dirtiest glare. “Draco, I’m so sorry.”

Before he could open his mouth to tell you off and incessantly insult you into oblivion, you reached forward and took his wounded hand in yours, the softness of your hands and tender touch throwing him off guard. He watched you as you examined the damage on one of his fingers.

“It’s just a sprain,” you finalized after inspecting it for a couple seconds. Draco recoiled his hand from yours as if he had touched a hot surface. He moved to get up and you huffed out a “wait, hold on,” as you scrambled around the ground for your wand. When you felt the wood underneath your fingertips, you clutched it and jumped to your feet, gently grabbing onto the sleeve of Draco’s robe who was already trying to retreat.

“Get away,” he snarled, snatching his arm out of your grasp.

“Let me help,” you pleaded softly, “it’ll be quick, I promise.”

Draco looked down at you with annoyance. He was about to leave again until he felt that same tender touch from just a few moments ago. The feeling stunning him again as he looked down at his hand that was now lying palm up in yours.

“Episkey,” you drawled the wand over his injured finger, the both of you watching the swollen and purple bruise beginning to form suddenly fade away.

Draco gave you one last scowl before he snatched his hand out of yours and turned around to leave the corridor, leaving you standing there dumbfounded as he quickly walked away, his cloak floating behind him like the professor, who’s class you now realized you were very late for.

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* 

That night, Draco lied awake staring at his ceiling he had charmed to resemble a starry night sky. His mind wandered off to think about spells he could try to help fix the vanishing cabinet and different ways he could kill Dumbledore without actually having to face him. He thought of his parents, mostly his mom, and how much he wishes he could save her and himself from this life. He thought of this school and how much he missed being an unknowing child who just did his schoolwork, played quidditch and bully the Golden Trio. He missed the two-dimensional life he used to live. Even if he used to be a complete ignorant and snobby arse, he was a happy one at that. Only now he knows that life isn’t what mummy or daddy say it is, in fact, it is so much worse.

He found his mind wandering to his uneventful day of dragging himself through his classes and failed attempts on the cabinet in the room of requirement. He then all of a sudden remembered the klutzy y/h/c girl that tripped into him and sprained his finger. He remembered how soft her touch was and how gentle she was in fixing said finger. That feeling was hard to forget. He hasn’t felt such tenderness since he doesn’t know how long. He recalled his mother’s hug before he boarded the train to Hogwarts, but that was ages ago.

In his ever growing turmoil, there wasn’t an ounce of warmth in Draco’s life since he’s returned to school. The coldness he was feeling on the inside was just as apparent as it was in his surroundings. He catches himself wishing he could feel that touch again, something about you radiated warmth, and just as quick as that thought appeared, he pushed it away. 

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*

The next day, as Draco was leaving the room of requirement and into the empty corridor, he felt the familiar ache in his chest that began to flow through his body. He had made little to no progress today on the cabinet. He felt a panic attack on the horizon, his breathing becoming staggered and tears pricking his eyes. He hated it. He hated feeling so weak.

He began rushing towards Moaning Myrtle’s bathroom, his tears blurring his vision and just like the day before, he crashed right into someone. Instinctively, he held the other person in place by their biceps so neither of them would fall. But that still didn’t stop how upon impact, the other person’s head had collided with his bottom lip. He squeezed his eyes in pain as he felt the skin break and blood quickly escaping it. When he pulled back, he focused on the figure in front of him and realized it was you. The same klutzy girl he bumped into yesterday. 

“Oh no, not again,” you frown, placing your hand on the part of your head that met Draco’s lip.

“You ought to watch where you’re going, you twit,” he snarls, stepping away from you in anger.

“It was an accident,” you responded just as harshly. You take a deep breath and throw the attitude aside. He was bleeding for Merlin’s sake and you felt bad that it was because of you. “I’m sorry, please let me heal you again,” you offer, taking a step towards him, closing up the space he had made.

“I think you’ve done enough,” he backs up, eyeing you down.

“Draco, please, just let me heal your lip and i’ll be out of your way,” you ask again, your soft and guilt ridden e/c eyes peering up at him through your lashes. Draco’s heart flutters, his anger subsiding for a second and he nods.

You step towards him once more and unexpectedly place a warm hand on his face while the other brings your wand up to his lip where it hovers. It was a non-verbal spell you used this time and he felt the pulsating pain in his lip subside to nothing. 

Even though he was healed, you both stayed in that position, your hand still on his cheek and his eyes gazing into yours. He didn’t realize it at that moment, but the pain in chest had also subsided, just a little. The tears had gone. His breathing was drastically slower.

“What’s your name?” the question tumbled from his lips before he could stop it. You gave him a small smile, your hand falling from his face and he frowns when he feels the cold on his skin from the loss of contact.

“It’s Y/N, Y/N Y/L/N” you answer. “We have potions together this year, actually.”

Draco thought back to that class, now that Slughorn was teaching it he hardly paid attention, especially since he felt he was skilled in it anyways so he would let himself slip into his thoughts and let the whole period pass by in a haze. He feels as though he might have heard your name here and there, but he wasn’t so sure.

“Hm, funny, I’ve never noticed you,” he says, not intending it to sound rude but it did. He watches your face fall and he feels a slight guilt poke at him.

“Well, like I said, I’ll be out of your way now,” you mumble to him, brushing past him softly as you continued your path out of the corridor and out of his sight.

He didn’t know why, but he felt a little sad to see you go. He shook his head, shaking the thought from his mind and instead of the bathroom, he decided to go to his room, no longer feeling like he did before your little encounter.

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*

As days went on, Draco ended up paying more attention in Slughorn’s class. Not to the chubby old professor, but to you, who he shared subtle glances with throughout classes and half-hearted smiles.

You wanted nothing more than to continue talking to him. To be in his presence. He was like a magnet to you, while everyone else thought the opposite of him. Even Pansy, who usually was up his ass, distanced herself from the ghost of the boy she once obsessed over. You couldn’t lie, the small crush you harbored on Draco had only grown more and more each day. It started about three years ago, during your third year when you had seen him in the hospital wing after his run-in with Buckbeak.

You remember the sheer shock you felt when you had seen him for the first time that year. The slicked back hair was gone, he had grown several inches taller, maybe even a foot taller now that you thought about it. His voice had deepened into that haughty tone you somehow couldn’t get enough of. But just like you, many other girls noticed these changes too and began pursuing him. Something you’d never had the guts to do.

Until now.

The feelings you had been suppressing for the past 3 years had come back in overflow the second you bumped into him the other day. Even worse this time since you’ve actually had a conversation with him now and the fact that he won’t stop looking at you.

Slughorn pulled you out of your thoughts when he announced to everyone to partner up to brew the potion he had been lecturing us on all week. Draught of Peace.

“This is your chance,” your friend besides you sings to you as you looked longingly in Draco’s direction who hasn’t moved from his spot.

“No, he usually works by himself, I don’t want to bother him anymore than I have,” you sigh, slumping down in your seat.

“Y/N, you’ve been in love with him since third year,” she huffs, “besides, maybe he only works alone because no one can stand being near him.”

“Shhh, someone might hear you,” you hiss, slumping even lower into your seat. “I am not in love with him, it’s just a stupid crush,” you whisper angrily to her while she only rolls her eyes.

“Okay, well, have fun working alone,” she smirks, getting up from her seat and scurrying across the room to join another classmate. You gape at her in distress, she returns the same gesture, mocking you. She then points over to Draco and smiles, giving you an encouraging thumbs up.

You rest your head in your hand for a second, feeling the hot blush that had made its way onto your face and focused your gaze onto the table in front of you. You mentally hexed your friend, who thought it’d be a good idea if she were ditch you so you would be forced to look for another partner. Jokes on her, you’re not getting up from this seat.

‘I can’t go up to him,” you thought, ‘he probably thinks I’m some annoying creep who won’t leave him alone. I’ll just work by myself.”

Draco looks over at you, noticing the empty space beside you and the frown on your face as you pushed your Potions book to the side and sat up to get your cauldron ready. You were alone, and so was he. He fought himself on whether or not he should join you. It was a bold move, especially for him. He was used to working alone, but the longer he looked at you, the more he found himself missing the sound of your honey sweet voice and soft eyes. Before he had any more time to argue with himself about it, he gathered up all his things and walked over to the empty spot next to you.

“Do you want help?” Draco asked awkwardly, immediately regretting his decision to move. Your eyes shot up from the potion book, not expecting to see the blond next to you with a faint blush on his cheeks.

“Um, yes, actually, that’d be nice,” you mutter out to him, moving some stuff around on the table so that he would have space for his. You could hardly contain the deep red blush that was already on your face from intensifying at his presence. You swallowed thickly as the realization set in that your longtime crush was right beside you and even offering a helping hand. Which in Draco’s case was extremely rare, almost unheard of. Matter of fact, this is something the Slytherin Prince has never done.

He sets his bag down and his supplies and takes a seat, rolling up his sleeves so that he could get started on crushing the porcupine quills into the moonstone powder. The amount of times he has made this potion by now for himself was sad, but good in this case since he would be able to impress you with his skill.

He worked diligently and quietly and you watched as his long slender fingers worked everything with attention and precision. You were looking up at him every now and then which you now realized was a terrible idea considering you were in the middle of cutting ginger root and you weren’t exactly coordinated to begin with. You felt the sharp blade slide across your finger and a small gasp left your mouth when the pain instantly began once the first drop of blood fell.

Draco looked at you in confusion, his eyes widening slightly when he saw the blood dripping from your hand and your face contorted in pain. You ignored the looks Draco was giving you, afraid that he might be looking at you with contempt for being sloppy.

“Y/L/N, perhaps you should go to Madam Pomfrey,” Draco suggests, now seeing that the cut was very deep as you inspected it. In fact, it was so deep he swore he could’ve seen bone.

“No, it’s fine, I can heal it,” you ignored the sharp pain and placed your hand on the table and pointed your wand at the cut with your uninjured hand. You focused on the cut and closed your eyes, letting your wand do its magic with your unspoken spell. When you opened your eyes, the cut was gone, just a small scar in its place and drying blood around it. “You see,” you smile, turning towards Draco and waving your finger, “brand new.”

“You don’t want dittany for the scarring?” Draco asked with an eyebrow raised.

“No, I don’t mind them and this one is small anyways. They’re like memories to me. Some come from good experiences, some bad. I don’t know if you’ve noticed, but I’m a little clumsy,” you explain, a small smile on your lips.

“Trust me, I’ve noticed,” he sighs, “so you’ve managed to become your own healer because of that?”

“Exactly that,” you hummed. “That’s actually what I’m studying to be. I plan on being at St. Mungo’s once we graduate. I’ve been studying for it my whole life.”

Draco was silent for a moment. He watched as you carefully threw ingredients into the cauldron and stirred them with caution. He noticed that despite your clumsiness, you handled everything you touched with a care and gentleness. It was a calming sight to him for some reason and he faintly smiled.

“I think you’d be a great healer,” he complimented quietly. You looked at him with one of the brightest smiles he’s ever seen and his heart swells at the thought of it being because of him. He feels a smile mirroring yours that tries to break through, but he fights it.

“You know, you’re a lot nicer than you let on,” you say quietly, waiting for his reaction from the corner of his eye. Draco wants to give you a snarky remark, just to uphold his cold reputation he’s given himself since his first day back at Hogwarts, but he doesn’t.

Instead of saying anything, he just shrugged and gave you a small smile, turning his attention back to the task at hand. You do the same, choosing to enjoy the comfortable silence that had settled.

When Slughorn came by to check when you finished, he eyed you and Draco and smiled.

"Ahh, Mr. Malfoy, I’m glad you’ve finally decided to partner up with someone,” he gleamed. “Miss Y/L/N here is an excellent potions student such as yourself.”

“Yes, she is,” Draco responded, keeping his eyes trained on the professor. He didn’t want to look at you, feeling embarrassed that he has now complimented you twice in the last 20 minutes. You smiled to yourself, something you’ve been doing a lot of since the slytherin boy sat next to you.

“Well, I suppose you’ll be pleased to know the two of you have brewed an outstanding potion,” Slughorn grins, “both of you will receive perfect marks on this. You can be excused from today’s class now.”

“Thank you, Professor,” you begin gathering your things and turn towards Draco. “I’ll see you next class? Or maybe somewhere around the castle when I accidentally bump into you.”

Draco chuckles and shakes his head, “perhaps. I’ll see you soon, Y/L/N.”

With that, he strides out of the class, you staring at the back of his platinum blond head with a stupid smile on your face.

“You’re welcome,” your friend suddenly appeared next to you, playfully slapping your arm. “I don’t remember the last time I’ve seen Draco look so... calm.”

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*

Weeks had gone by, and several Potions classes. The seat beside you now belonged to Draco and the two of you had in a sense, become friends. Or acquaintances. You couldn’t quite say. 

He was still brooding and mostly kept to himself, but he would converse with you here and there about things, almost always school. The two of you continuously getting outstanding marks on everything you produced much to Slughorn’s delight.

Sometimes he would come to class looking disheveled or angry and those were the days where no matter how much you tried to talk to him to at least maybe get his mind off things, he would ignore you. Wouldn’t even look at you. You couldn’t deny how it had hurt your feelings, but you would brush off the hurt and remind yourself that it wasn’t personal. He was obviously going through something, you didn’t know what, but you had to respect that sometimes he just didn’t want to talk. That was hard. Especially because you just wanted to hear his voice or see him give you that rare smile when you would say something he found amusing or you would accidentally drop something off the table with your elbows or knocked over with your hands. 

You were rounding a corridor when you saw the flash of blond zoom past you. He didn’t see you, but you saw the pointed look in his eyes and the tears that were pooling in the stormy gray eyes that you adored. You mentally fought yourself on whether or not you should follow him, he looked so upset and all you wanted to do was give him a peace of mind. So you followed him, all through two corridors until he disappeared into Moaning Myrtle’s bathroom.

Your heart broke at the sobs that filled the bathroom. They were full of pain and despair. The sound of his rapid breathing mixed in with his cries was more than enough to let you know that he was having a panic attack. You pushed open the door slightly to see him hunched over a sink, his robe discarded on the ground along with his vest and tie leaving him in only a white long sleeved dress shirt. 

You wanted to run in and help, but stayed back, realizing that this was something that was extremely personal. You knew he would be livid if you or anyone saw him like this, so broken and emotional. You were about to leave, all of a sudden feeling very ashamed for even following him in here. You watched as he looked up into the mirror, an anger flashing in his eyes as he stared at the reflection looking back at him. Not yours, but his. All he could see was a monster staring back at him. A failure. A weak man. He was disgusted and angry with what he saw and before he knew what he was doing, he had pulled his fist back and you watched it collide with the middle of the mirror where he had been. The glass shattered upon impact, the shards now flying in all different directions and embedding into his knuckles. He fell to the ground on his knees, in pain and clutching his fist as his cries only got louder. 

That was when you threw open the door, rushing in to help him, not caring that you were going to have to put up a fight in order to even get near him. Draco’s eyes shot up to meet yours, and just like you thought, he was beyond pissed to see you. 

Draco has never felt such humiliation in his life. The beautiful and kind y/h girl he had acquainted himself with, was now looking at him with pity. He grabbed his wand from his pocket, pointing it at you with such quickness that you faltered in your steps.

“Get. Out!” He yelled, his wand shaking violently in his uninjured hand. He would never hex you, but he figured you would fall for his bluff and leave. But you didn’t. You only sat yourself down a few feet away from him and felt your own tears begin to fall. “Y/L/N, I swear to Merlin, if you don’t leave, I’ll-”

“You’ll what?” you challenged. “I just want to help.”

“I don’t need your help,” he sneered, his wand still pointed at you.

“You’re bleeding, a lot, Draco,” you point to his bloodied hand that curled to his chest. “You know I can save you a trip to the hospital wing and Madam Pomfrey’s interrogation.”

After a few moments of silence and a wand still pointed at you, you slowly scoot towards him. Your hand encloses around the one holding his wand and you lower it for him while he watches you. He was still crying and breathing heavily. His panic attack somehow getting worse now and no longer having the energy to fight you. You finally reach him, now knee to knee with him and you place a hand on his shoulder.

“Draco, just breath with me,” you say calmly. “In,” you took a long exaggerated inhale, and after a few seconds, “out,” and let out an equally exaggerated exhale. You did that with him for a while, his pained gray eyes focused on yours the whole time, never breaking eye contact. Once he was calmed down enough and was just left with the post crying hiccoughs, you took his injured hand in yours. There was shards and particles of glass stuck in his reddened and bloody skin.

You reached into your robe pocket and pulled out a set of tweezers you kept with you. You often found yourself getting splinters or tiny rocks stuck in your skin when your hands hit the pavement when you’d fall you try and catch yourself.

“This might hurt,” you warn, starting to remove one of the biggest pieces. He sharply inhales as you try your best to do take it out carefully.

It was quiet the rest of the process, just sniffles and gasps from Draco when you had removed a piece that especially hurt. When you were done, you waved your wand over the gashes and watched as they faded into faint pink scars. You got up, pulling him with you and took him to the sink where you rinsed off the blood from both your hands and his. 

He couldn’t say anything. He didn’t know what. He just stared at you, dumbfounded and confused. You turned your body to face his and he did the same, eyeing you carefully and still very cautious to any move you made.

“I can leave now, if you’d like me to,” you offer quietly. He stayed silent, wondering if he should just send you off. But he didn’t want to. You had already seen him at his worst, and he was terribly alone, so he just shook his head ‘no.’ You looked up at him and decided to risk it all. “Can I give you a hug?”

Draco was stunned at the question, his heart pounding against his chest. “I suppose,” he managed to let out in a strained voice.

You slowly stepped closer to him and slid your arms up his biceps until your hands met behind his neck. You stood on your tippy toes and pulled him into you, his chin now resting on your shoulder as your hand smoothed the back of his head. You felt him stiff under your touch and as he got comfortable in your embrace, his arms raised from his sides and snaked around your waist, pushing you flush against him. You stayed like that for what felt like forever, and he held you tightly, not wanting to let go.

This was the first time in a long time that he had felt any type of relief. It had been such a constant uphill battle for him, day after day. He took a deep inhale accidentally, but the smell of your perfume and shampoo filling his nose and his mind made him feel at ease. The warmth of your body from underneath his fingertips brought him peace and succor.

“Thank you,” he whispered into your hair so quietly that if you weren’t so focused on him, you would’ve missed it.

“Anytime.”

That was the day Draco Malfoy became your friend.

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*

Potions class was no longer the only place you would see Draco. Now that the two of you were comfortable with one another and he trusted you more than anyone else, he found himself hanging out with you every day during his free time when he would be done messing with the cabinet.

It would be taking walks around the castle. Sneaking out at night and meeting behind statues to talk. Sitting together at a bench in the courtyard. Skipping stones along the Black Lake. It’s been months of this. Months of friendship he so desperately needed. You had helped him through several more panic attacks and meltdowns, each time coming closer together. He never told you about what caused them. The worst ones were when he found he had almost killed Katie Bell and Ron Weasley, and as much as you begged him to tell you, he kept his mouth shut. 

He had spent so much time with you that it was affecting him. But for the better. He found himself eating again at the Slytherin table and his friends were more than excited to have him back. He still wasn’t too buddy-buddy with everyone as he once was, but he joined conversations and shared a couple jokes. He was even sleeping a little more. He was still beyond stressed, but it wasn’t as gut-wrenching. He enjoyed Potions again and even started paying a little more attention in his other classes. His new found energy even helped him greatly progress in mending the vanishing cabinet, finally making a breakthrough in fixing it.

He would lie awake at night sometimes and thank Merlin you crashed into his life, literally. You were like an angel to him, healing his heart with every word and smile and touch you sent his way. It was easy with you. He tried his best to keep his emotions at bay, reminding himself that when he would have to follow through with his task, he would lose you and that thought pained him to no end. But he was selfish, and he adored you with every fiber of his being so he couldn’t leave you alone. And especially not when he needed you most.

Today, you lied in the grass, shoulder to shoulder and staring up at the sky and watching the clouds. You were a little ways from the castle, away from all your other classmates and teachers and it was nice. Finally being able to enjoy time with the Slytherin Prince without people gawking at the two of you.

“My mother used to do this with me when I was a small,” Draco trailed off, his eyes following a particular funny shaped cloud. “She would take me out to the garden behind the Manor, usually when father was doing some work at the ministry. But we would sit against this tall oak tree and I’d be on her lap and she’d have her arms wrapped around me and she would point out the funniest shaped clouds and try to pinpoint what they resemble. Sometimes she’d even joke around and say the weirdest shaped cloud looked like father.”

You giggled at that last part, your heart swelling at the story. He rarely talked about his family, but when he did, it would always be of his mother and a happy memory he had with her, never his father.

“Draco, can I ask you something?” you turn onto your side, your elbow holding you up as you gazed down at him.

“What do you wanna know, darling?” you blushed at the nickname but brushed it aside, knowing he only meant it in a friendly way.

“Forgive me if it’s rude, you don’t have to answer,” you begin, “but do you miss your father? I know it’s none of my business and I’m so sorry the Daily Prophet put your family business on blast like that. I can’t imagine how that must have felt.”

Draco frowned and followed you in turning onto his side and propping himself up with his elbow to face you. You remembered the image of Draco and his mother on the newspaper, bright lights flashing across their faces as all the press tried to get picture of them after the sentencing of Lucius Malfoy to Azkaban. You remembered seeing Draco look so sad, yet strong beside his mother as he looked from her and then into the camera with disdain. 

“Sometimes, I do,” he answers, eyebrows furrowed as he thought of his father. “My whole life, he’s expected nothing short of perfection from me. There were no room for mistakes, and if I made any, I would be punished for them. I remember coming to Hogwarts was like an escape, a place where I could finally sort of relax and be a child. I don’t miss his scolding or his coldness. But I miss having a father, I miss going home on that first day of summer and seeing both my parents even if he was going to reprimand me for something later on in the day. He’s been with me my whole life, and now he’s gone, stuck in a cell in Azkaban. He’s never going to be the same. Home is never going to be the same.”

You felt tears prick your eyes as you listened to the boy beside you, a distant look in his eyes as he turned back over on his back to look at the sky in the middle of his explanation. You sat up and he did the same, looking at you with a frown when he noticed you were about to cry. You took your hand in his and held it tightly.

“I’m sorry, Draco,” you mumble. “You don’t deserve any of the bad things you’ve been through.”

“I do,” he shrugs. “I’ve been a real git since I’ve been at Hogwarts, you know.”

“You’re different now,” you say. “Sure, you still haven’t lost a little bit of the Malfoy snobbishness and you’re still a bit of a git, but you’re kinder and more gentle. You’re a lot more empathetic and perceptive. I mean, I’ve never spoken to you prior to this year, but your reputation follows and the Draco in front of me doesn’t seem anything like the Draco you were.”

“How you’ve managed to insult me while complimenting me is something I’ve never seen anyone be able to do successfully is astonishing,” he laughs, a smile growing on his face as you laughed with him.

“I’m serious, Dray,” you giggle, “I think you’re a good person.”

“I’m not good,” he thinks to himself. The compliment leaving your lips made him feel foul. He didn’t deserve to have such a kind soul complimenting him to be something he’d never amount to. He frowned and harshly stood up, and you quickly followed. Suddenly afraid that you might have overstepped your boundaries.

“Where are you going?” You ask, fear trembling in your voice. He begins to hurriedly walk off and you chase after him, stopping in front of him so you could place your hands on his chest to stop him. 

“Y/N, let me go,” he pleads. “I’m not who you think I am.”

“I think I’ve been around you long enough to know who you are.”

“Not long enough.”

You stare up at him, but he refuses to look at you. His body feels rigid under your touch and it pains you to see him beginning to shut down again.

“I know something has been bothering you this year, and I know it’s not just because of what happened with your father,” you start. “I don’t know what is hurting you so deeply enough to make you hate yourself, but I’m here to tell you that whatever that thing is, it doesn’t define you.”

Draco swallows thickly, the tears already falling down his cheeks. “It does, it does.”

“No, it doesn’t,” you cry with him. “Even if you don’t see your goodness, I do.”

Both you and Draco are crying, the tree you were now standing under was swaying violently in the wind, as if it was picking up on your guys’ emotions. You placed a hand on his cheek, and he leaned down, pressing his forehead against yours.

“I’m not good,” he whispers to you, “and once you see that, you’re going to hate me.”

“I could never hate you, Draco Malfoy,” you promise, a complete sincerity in your voice that it makes his heart jump.

Draco lifts his head up and sniffles, he watched you do the same, peering up at him through your wet lashes. He brought his thumb up to smooth the crease in between your eyebrows, letting it fall down to your cheeks where he wiped away the stray tears that had stilled. His hand then landed on your mouth that was pulled down in a grimace that matched his own. His thumb grazed over your lips, the softness of them nearly driving him mad. He wanted nothing more than to feel them against his own, but he couldn’t bring himself to kiss you. He didn’t want to drag you into the darkness of his life more than he already has.

“Kiss me,” you said to him, so softly but it rang loud in his ears. You had seen the way he looked at you and how he seemed so focused on your lips. You knew what he was thinking because it was exactly what you were thinking. You wanted this just as badly as he did. “Kiss me.”

Every argument he had in his head vanished and suddenly he closed the small space between the two of you and gently placed his lips onto yours. It was a fluid movement, like two puzzle pieces fitting together.

Your hands found their way in his hair, holding him closer to you and he did the same by gripping onto your hips. His lips were soft against yours, filled with fervor and desire. He was gentle with you, but you could still feel the deepness of his kiss and how it intensified with each second. He had put all his emotions into it, his care, his appreciation, his want, his sadness, his grief, his love.

When he pulled away and the two of you stood there staring at each other with love stricken eyes, he realized he had made a grave mistake.

He realized he was in love with you. He realized that he would never be able to let you go, and you would never let him go. And he knew that with the direction his life was going in, one way or another, you would get hurt and he would lose you, maybe even to death itself.

So in that moment he knew. As much as he loved you and wanted more than anything to be with you, he couldn’t put you in that position where you would be staring evil and death in the face. He wouldn’t tarnish your beautiful soul like that.

“I have to go,” he breathed out. “Please, leave me alone. For good.”

And with that he turned away, leaving you standing under the tree with tears falling down your face, a sob escaping your throat and the sound of your knees hitting the grass below you. He held back his own cries and walked faster away from you, knowing you had finally done damage to yourself that you couldn’t heal, and it was all his fault.

PART 2