#old man twunk love... amazing

[blee-bleep]

old man yaoi... save me... old man yaoi. save me

[skarkkk]

First, Queer Week.

It's interesting that they brought this representation to the show, both in terms of probably pink money or maybe even for the story.

Which brings me to, Second, The drag queen and Tristan.

I loved their conversation and the fact that Tristan really doesn't know. He's not black or a drag queen, he doesn't know what she went through and I loved the fact that she tried to make him understand that with their conversation, even though it was really a venting about what had happened to her and how it affected her because it was her image, her femininity, not just a wig. I confess, I wanted more of their conversation, but it makes sense that it happened the way it did. And I loved the scene of her coming back at the end being her without a wig and just her. (I'm referring to him with female pronouns, I don't know if I should but it's how I think the character would like to be called, I don't remember the episode or if she referred to herself with him in character, so if I'm wrong and it sounds disrespectful, it wasn't my intention.)

Third, Tristan and his whole vibe. He's not straight.

In the entire episode there was more than one scene of him preening himself under the gaze of the queer men on the cruise, like how he told Avery that "I was going to say amazing" and how the conversation with Avery came after Max admitted he wanted to marry a woman. Speaking of him, I really feel like he has a repressed bisexuality (or pan, or maybe even demi aro, I think it's unlikely, but point made), the way he acted only reinforced that point, as far as being looked at, receiving attention and being liked by both genders as maybe being looked at. Besides him calling himself a Twunk (slang for a young, thin but muscular gay or queer man - according to Google)

Fourth, the Trisal.

Avery tries to get the three of them back together even if it's just for sex and can't. She wants to. Max came up with this thing about being a traditionalist. He runs away to the middle of the sea, gets involved with the employee and then again with two employees (the sex scene was left for the picture, but even if Max and Tristan didn't touch each other it's still considered involvement) and says the thing "I want to marry the woman/person I love, have children" but being so open to another Trisal. A traditionalist wouldn't have gotten involved in a threesome, or would support another, or would be so open to living with queers for a week (or in other situations. I may be following stereotypes regarding traditionalist people, but at least that's the context I see with him saying that in that scene in that way).

Fifth, Avery's conversation with Tristan.

(Being a brazilian with half-assed English, I confess that I didn't understand much of what he was saying in relation to UK potatoes, so I'll go by the context). The issue of sharing Avery's love for her and his saying "it makes me sick" (I loved the acting and the intonation) is already a whole step towards the fact that this could again become a triangle, or simply generate a lot of anguish. In Tristan's view, it would be him and her and Max and Avery, and not all three together (assumptions) and that would be sharing the person he loves.

Sixth, their chemistry as a poly relationship is incredible and it would be such a missed opportunity to turn it into a triangle and end with a couple (2), in addition to missing the opportunity for unusual representation in series like these. It would drive away the homophobes, but as seen with 911 they don't give a damn, so why miss the chance to bring them all together? to put a kiss between Max and Tristan on screen?

Seventh, Captain and his brother + threesome. Even though he's old, "traditionalist?", he's still open-minded and learns community slang and tries to get involved in his brother's relationship. I thought their threesome was cute, and how even though the couple had met before, they seemed connected and how in the end it didn't end with them breaking up because of any movement or with a bad relationship between brothers regarding alcoholism and the sugar thing that caused it.

Eighth, about the next episode (which I haven't seen yet, so I'm anxious to know if I'm right in my thinking).

Avery getting pregnant and how it almost doesn't make sense considering she had sex with a doctor and a nurse who know very well how babies are made (where did you put the condom?). I don't think that if this pregnancy was real and not just a test error or something, she'll keep the baby. She dreams of being a doctor, studying medicine and working in the field and having a baby would only delay that as well as her future, why a child and college? Sure, she has the chance to deliver the baby and put it up for adoption. I think her decision will be the same regardless of who the father is (Max is the obvious choice, so maybe they'll cast Tristan, but probably Max). Of course this will affect the father differently, Max worse because he dreams of having children probably more than Tristan (having had a wife, which was highlighted in the last episode) and because there's a power difference in his relationship with his employee.

Ninth, accident. From what the preview showed, a patient and Max and Avery looking worried, I'm hoping something went wrong with Tristan, because I honestly want more focus on him and him as part of the threesome and the team. The show focuses a lot on Max and Avery, and I love them, but mommy issues would be perfect and fit so well with ABC (Hello, is this Evan Buckley? Maddie Buckley-Han? Eddie Diaz? Athena Grant? Henrietta Wilson?). In this case, it would open up so many opportunities for a conversation between Max and Tristan (not leaving Avery out, but creating development outside of her, you know) about how he was afraid of losing Tristan not only because he was a friend/employee, but as something more romantic. It would probably also affect Avery's decisions regarding the baby if the accident happened after she found out and if it really is Tristan, because the chances of it not being Tristan are 99.99%.

[the-togepi-man]

I'm mentally in the gutter right now so

Some of yall be like "all bodies are great!" Then only reblog fetishized versions of people, whether that be people who are ideally fit or people who might be considered to have some weight on them. And like I get it, porn industries make it hard for us to find people that look real but it's so like... fake to see yall preach about body positivity then only post bodies that reach a standard.

Also, the way gay men treat their bodies and other men's bodies is so fucking wildly unhealthy. It's def a part of our society where we think that in order to be accepted we have to look amazing so people will treat us with respect but like, that's truly not good.

Like sure, care about your body and whatever. I know im guilty of it, but for fucks sake the way that we have actual classifications for body types is probably not healthy. Like twink? Otter? Bear? Cub? That shit is getting old.

And it's such a reminder to log offline and like, talk to people in person, go to the pool and see people, talk with them and get to know them and then realize their body wasn't the thing you were focusing on

I truly truly get we all have preferences but holy shit it's so wild to just watch how fucking much emphasis out community puts on being some dehydrated looking muscle jock or a fetishized hairy man with a belly. Like holy fuck we are more than that. More than Twunks, more than cub gaymers, more than models who tell us how we should look-

Anyways, I'm transitioning off my antidepressants since they're not working so I can get on some new ones so this is all just rambling but hot damn. Sorry fam, I'm just bent way out of shape because like, I get it. I also do these things. But its so important to know that we're real people out here with real feelings and real bodies. Some of work out to feel better, some of us have disabilities that prevent us from looking like GQ models, and some of us don't know what the fuck we should look like so we think we fail at it all.

I dunno man. Just like. Can we start loving everyone?

[ego-meliorem-esse]

A portrait study turned into a portrait of Matt. Can't say I'm too pleased with it or that I'll actually finish the drawing...

(Also yes I added the curl because why not it adds charm don't mind me pls)

Appearance, fashion and demeanour:

What if?? Matt was actually???like veryy handsome and good looking?? But??? Isn't vain at all?????

In my mind, Matt is a sight for sore eyes. He looks nice from every angle. This perfect overgrown French-Canadian twunk (twink/hunk lol)! I love to contrast that with the fact that he doesn't care much about his looks. Unlike his father, Francis of course. While Francis is very prideful about his appearance, Matt just can't be bothered.

I headcacon that Matt ties his blond, shoulder-length hair almost all the time. He likes his hair (It's the one thing he will actually admit to liking about himself the poor bastard baby) and refuses to have it shortened.

Matthew has high cheekbones, fuller lips and a delicate nose. These features would make him look almost androgynous if his physique was smaller. But alas, he is a big boy indeed!

In Arthur's opinion, Matthew looks way too much like Francis when it comes to his face and hair. Just that fact alone made Arthur deeply dislike the boy when he initially took him in after the Treaty of Paris in 1763. Things have changed of course, and finally Arthur sees Matt as his own person after a while of living under his roof. The fact that Matt didn't act anything like Francis also helped a lot.

His eyesight was damaged by poison gas after the Second Battle of Ypres in 1915, so now our boy needs glasses. He doesn't wear them always, though most of the time he will have them on. He has deep blue eyes, but you hardly get to see them in their full glory due to his glasses.

Matt wears whatever is comfortable. He has a very plain style. A white-shirt-and-jeans kind of style. Not to say he doesn't have a sense for fashion. He does know what looks good on him, but rarely goes out of his comfort zone in regard to his clothes. His style is also very Canadian... I'm all for the denim jacket and jeans combo for Matt. Also, of course our boy has a closet full of those plaid flannel shirts in every color.

As for his personality, I don't see Matthew as shy, just reserved. To me he is the perfect type of person to be involved in the medical sciences. In my mind Matt always wanted to help people and was always interested in medicine. In modern times he would be an excellent doctor, and during war he would make an amazing war medic.

Family and Friends:

Buckle in lads, My headcanons for Matt's early life are somewhat different.

Since he was born (and I headcanon that countries are actually born, and they don't just appear), and up until Canada was traded in exchange for some sugar colonies, he was living in France with his papa (though I'm hesitant to call Francis that). His whole life was that of a little French noble. And although he didn't know better, he knew that this was not what he wanted. He liked the outdoors and Europe was always just a tad too warm for him. In his early days he would have visited his own land maybe two times, and would be swiftly returned to France after a short while.

As any colonizer, France liked showing off his overseas colonies. And even though he may not like to admit it, Francis kept Mathieu in France mostly for that reason. Of course he loved the boy, but with his lifestyle, being a parent is not really an option. Not to say that Francis treated Matt badly, in fact, he was very spoiled as a son of a nobleman. Francis loved him in his own distant and very selfish way (he was kind to the boy but rarely actually spent time with him).

After moving to England and having 'Mathieu' changed to 'Matthew', our boy finally met someone whom he grew very close to. Alfred was a ray of sunshine. A spoiled brat with huge ambitions and a need to just absorb information at any given opportunity. On one hand they didn't understand each other for at least 1 to 2 years (until Matt learned English), but on the other hand, they were inseparable.

That changed of course when he was abandoned for the second time in his life, when Alfred left to lead a revolution against his old man. It would be a while before he opened up to another person again.

At least after Alfred left, Arthur finally let Matthew live (at least for a while) in his own land. Québec was a fairly cold place but it was home after all. He was the happiest during those times when he was allowed to return home.

When Australia and New Zealand came along, Matt was still very guarded but opened up a bit later on. Their relationship is another very interesting thing for me. It developed into a bond after the first world war and just strengthened after the second one.

Since Matt is very easy to talk to and is an amazing listener, he has very few nations whom he can argue with or generally be on bad terms with. Throughout Canada's history, he has formed some strong friendships around the world. Be it with The Netherlands, Germany, Slovakia or any number of other nations. Canada is just very well liked, compared to his brother in the south.

I'm sorry that this was more tragic than fun, but I just needed to get my thoughts sorted about this absolutely beautiful boy who deserves some damn peace and quiet. Also sorry If this doesn't make much sense. This character is one of my absolute favourites to draw. Even write about, though I'm still learning English lol

[tagedeszorns]

About fanart and fanfiction

There's this great, super tasty restaurant. They make the most amazing, shall we say, omelettes. Everyone raves about it. And I love the taste of omelette. But I'm vegan. I can eat some things in this restaurant, but I have to give up the omelette. So I study the menu down to the smallest detail, learn all about the spices and how to prepare it.

And then I go home and make the omelette with silken tofu instead of eggs. And it tastes great! I and the other vegans are happy. The people who like to eat eggs don't have to have silken tofu. They don't even have to see it. The silken tofu omelette only exists for those who actively want it.

And it's the same with fanart. I draw things the way I want to see them. I know the recipe of the omelette down to the last detail. I am an absolute fluff bunny (years of lore-discussion, on convetions, online and in person with my friends, and dozens of books have me prepared for most topics). I know the rules so I can break them for my own pleasure. Because what I want doesn't exist in the canon. Or doesn't exist in a way that I find aesthetically pleasing.

I am not attacking the canon with this. And if someone pays me for a commission that has to look official, I draw everything so canonically it squeaks. Someone wants gigantic man-meat? No problem! I'll draw the love-child of The Rock and a monster truck! There will be no neck whatsoever! Just meat.

But for me there'll still be graceful twinks and twunks. My aesthetic, my fanart. I respect the canon - but I'm Fabulous Bill and I build what I feel like.

I don't eat everything in the fanart/fanfic restaurant either. Some slash-pairings are just not what I like. Or some themes just don't interest me, even though they're in the fanart/fic restaurant all the time (uuurrrggghh ... Eldar ...). But I will fight tooth and nail for the right of every fanart/fic artist to make the most absurd pairings or draw bootypixies!

Of course, the silken tofu omelette exists in the same virtual space as the official restaurant and its omelette. Which is why you'll notice each other every now and then. You share tags and no doubt you'll see things you don't find appealing. Just like in real life!

The best thing to do then is to look at everything (if you feel like it, there's no obligation) and maybe you'll understand what the artist meant. Eldar artists - you are great. Thousand Sons fans ... I have no idea what you've been smoking, but me and the Wolf Bois are cheering you on!

Second best thing is to just keep scrolling. The menu is big, there's something for everyone.

Absolutely not a good idea to open a discussion about realism and whether something is canonical. Most universes are so consistent that small trucks drive through the plotholes practically all the time. We open this barrel when, in the Star Wars universe, travel times have been equalised and the pronunciation of Twi'lek has been agreed upon, in Star Trek the timeline has been unravelled and in Warhammer the origin stories from thirty years ago have been disposed of. Ah ... and realism. Hmmmm. Well. I hate to say it, but basically it's not a good idea to hurl gothic cathedrals through a hard vacuum. Not even if there are people inside who can spit acid, get the memories of a corpse by eating it and metabolise old shoes.

TLDR: I love you all, you great fanart/fanfic-producing disasters, you make all the beautiful fictional worlds even more colourful. You are the salt of the earth.

[callsignbaphomet]

So I’m just gonna get right to the point. I love playing Skyrim, I love playing as my OCs in Skyrim. I especially love modding the living heck out of this game while playing as my OCs and pretty much living vicariously through them.

However, as much as I love this game IT IS SEVERELY LACKING IN LGBTQ+ CONTENT AND THE OPTION TO MARRY SOME CHARACTERS OF THE SAME GENDER AND ONE INSTANCE OF AN MLM COUPLE THROUGH A LETTER BECAUSE THEY’RE BOTH DEAD AF IN THE DRAGONBORN DLC IS NOT ENOUGH FOR MY QUEER ASS!

So what to do? Mods! It’s 2020 and a lot more people are openly accepting and open-minded, right? So finding LGBTQ+ mods should be a lot easier, right? Eh.........no. I’ve spent several days trying to find mods to make my Skyrim playthrough as queer as I possibly can make it, specifically for my High Elf OC who is trans (FtM), very effeminate, has a none muscular body and build and very gay. I think now, after several days of research, tutorials, testing and an endless amount of headaches I think I have the mods to make my play through true to how I imagine and have written this character as.

Bare with me for a few seconds, I promise I’ll get to the point and this is worth reading. I’m trying to get as much information in this as possible.

Disclaimer:

This mod list is only for the PC version of the game. Look, I’m super, super sorry but basically over 95% of all these mods are exclusively found online and even if they ARE on beth.net they aren’t used at full capacity from what I understand. Believe me, as a mainly console player, it breaks my heart that I can’t include the consoles for this list.

I won’t be linking to just Nexus. I’ve found a bunch of mods outside of the Nexus that are reliable.

I’ll only be working with the Special Edition version of the game. It’s the one I have and am playing on.

I will NOT be covering female body replacers. At freakin’ all. There are literal dozens of mods covering this. There will only be ONE and it is for very specific reasons only.

In my little venture into finding these mods I came across a lot of homophobic, transphobic and downright disgusting comments within the Nexus. I also found out a lot of queer mod authors were driven out of the Nexus because of said homophobic people. This is what happened to Vector and also why SavrenX refuses to upload anything other than weapon, item retextures to the Nexus. Nexus users and community overall is very homophobic and toxic so I’m very sorry if you see or read something upsetting. I advice you avoid the comments (known as posts on Nexus) tab as to avoid seeing some vile shit. Ignore them and don’t engage them ffs, they just want a reaction out of you. There’s no correcting these assholes much less educating them. They ain’t worth your time. Just report and move on.

The majority of the mods linked in this post have been tried by me, if I haven’t tried them out I’ll say so. Again, I’m learning as I go along and believe me this hasn’t been an easy task to find all of these working mods.

No, I won’t be searching or uploading any ports, texture, mesh or mod edits I myself have done. I ain’t confident in how well I may have or not have edited the mods and more importantly that’s as bad as uploading art that wasn’t done by you. Sadly, you’ll have to do these changes yourself. I’ll try my best to link tutorials. Also don’t go and harass the authors for a port or an update ffs.

I’ll most likely be editing this list as I learn more.

Yes, I will leave links from adult sites. A lot of these sites pretty much force you to sign up in order for you to download their content. It’s fine, just make some random account and you’ll instantly gain access to the mods. Just know there’ll be nsfw images, gifs and videos everywhere in these sites.

While I will be referring to male characters a lot of these if not all can also cater to non-binary characters too!

No, I will not be covering sex mods. I have no intention of adding them to any of my load orders and I really don’t care to. You’re on your own for that category. Try Lover’s Lab.

*Body Mods/Replacers/Races:

Schlongs of Skyrim (aka SOS). Not the only choice out there but the most current and fully working one. Pretty much mandatory for a bunch of mods so might as well have it, ya know?

Tempered Skins for Males. Was known as Better Males; pairs up beautifully with SOS. Super amazing work if you ask me.

Shape Atlas for Men (aka SAM). This is literally the god king of all male body replacers. Want a twunk? This mod will do it. Want a regular Joe? This can do it. Want a bear of a man running around in Skyrim? Yeah, girl, this can do it. Ever since I discovered it I have been obsessed with it! HOWEVER, the full working mod is only available for Old Skyrim, maybe for Legendary Edition but I’m not sure. Vector said he had plans to port the full working mod to Special Edition but confessed he was having issues with the scripts. Also afaik Vector’s last updates on working on the mod were back in late 2016 so I think it’s safe to say this beautiful mod will never be seen running on SSE. Sadly Vector just up and left the modding scene somewhere in 2018. It none of our business but from what I read he faced a lot of homophobic harassment from people not liking his body mod or giving him shit because he didn’t want to make a female body mod. He even faced harassment from our very own community.

Not all’s lost though. Some of the amazing modders in Vector’s site have made a working version for SSE.

SAM Light, SAM Morphs for RaceMenu, SAM SE Vanilla Armor Refit, SAM High Poly Conversion, SAM Light Texture Add-on, High Poly Head

The Ultra Femme. Title should be super self-explanatory. Super good if your character is really femme or non-binary or trans. I haven’t tried out this body myself and I’m not entirely sure whether this is compatible with SE or not. RefurbMadness has a lot of mods hosted in her site and still has some in Nexus that are being hosted by the site’s Care Taker. I’m actually gonna link a few later. I honestly suggest going through her site and reading up everything. She’s pretty clear when it comes to instructions, the only problem is she’s not exactly clear on whether her mods are compatible with SE or not. Maybe it’s written somewhere in there, I’m still new to modding and need very clear descriptions (you kinda gotta talk to me like I’m 5 when it comes to mods). I need to check more of her content and test a bunch of things. She also has armor and clothing mods.

Milkdrinker Male Texture and Slim Male Body for SoS (<3<3<3). Both by the same mod author. Sadly only available for Old Skyrim but the only reason why I linked it is because both mods are super easy to convert to use for SSE. Sweetie, if I managed to do it, you can do it too. Watch this, or this or this or try to Google it and see what comes up. Personally I tried the Slim Male Body and it was pretty good. Unfortunately you’d have to refit all the armors to fit either body yourself.

Transgender Race and NPCS SSE. Like I said before I wasn’t going to link or talk about any female body replacers except for one. This one! Look, there are a few out there but they’re extremely transmisogynistic and fetishistic and use a lot of outdated and transphobic language plus they’re mostly sex mods so I will abso-freaking-lutely NOT be linking them. Anyway, the people behind this port are back to working on this mod and have plans for adding transgender men. As of now the mod only has transgender women. They can’t add more genders due to the engine limitations and FYI they used “race” in the title because this isn’t a body mod, it’s actually a race. This is one of the few mods that won’t play well with SoS.

There IS one more body or better said, race, I tried but I really didn’t like it. Mod worked as it was advertised but--well, whatever, it’s for personal reasons that I didn’t like it and it depended way too much on a lot of more mods and it bloated up my LO something fierce so for that reason I ain’t gonna link it. Mod’s called Femboy if you wanna give it a try yourself.

*Extras (edits, armors, clothes and more):

Enhanced Character Edit SE. Tl;dr this is like RaceMenu but on steroids. It offers way more sliders and because of this it has fantastic potential to mold your character’s body to your personal liking. I used this instead of RM for my High Elf I mentioned earlier. He has a more “delicate” frame and is much thinner than my other OCs and this mod did exactly what I’ve been trying to achieve for a very long time now. Works like a charm.

SSE Luscious Locks for All - Unisex KS Hair. Makes it so that male characters can use all the hair options that comes with KS Hairdos SSE. Guys with long hair! Yummy! <3

Oooooooorrrrrrr you can just install ApachiiSkyHair SSE which has a bunch of long hair options for men to look fabulously yummy! This is the one I’m using.

Femfeet Redesigned SSE Port For Everyone. Look, it’s a foot texture mod, that’s it. Works with Better Males aka Tempered Skins and SoS, so yes, your guys will have pretty feet. Load this AFTER you body mod of choice.

Apachii Divine Elegance Store. This store has so much to offer. Really beautiful clothes and armors, exceptional jewelry, wonderful accessories aaaaaand your male character can also use the nails that are offered by the mod. So if you want your male character to have some stunning and colorful manicures done this mod offers it. They also offer actual claws that also comes in different colors so you can have both styles. Look, imo this is a must for femme male and enby characters. Your guys are going to look beautiful!

Immersive Jewelry - Earring for Male Characters. This enables Immersive Jewelry earrings to be wearable and visible on male characters.

Light Elven Armor for Men, Light Glass Armor for Men, Light Daedric Armor for Men. Tired of women being the only ones to get skimpy outfits? Ja, me too! Here’s some of the armor mods RefurbMadness ported to SSE before she left Nexus. There’s more available for Old Skyrim but you’ll need to convert them over to SSE yourself.

Slof’s Lair. Slof has a collection of skimpy armors, some accessories and even modern clothes (if that’s your thing). They have a link to their Nexus profile on their page but instead of adding all the links I just figured to leave the link to their site so you can check everything they have to offer. I haven’t tried any of Slof’s mods myself though I’m super interested in the Just For Men collection of mods and the Goth Shop (chill, it’s mostly Tera armors without the need to download that massive Tera mod).

Tera Armors Collection - Special Edition. And here’s that massive mod I previously mentioned but it’s actually a really good one. I’ve tested this out on both pc and Xbox One and it looks gorgeous on both!

The Well Dressed Mage. Not exactly skimpy but kind of revealing. Idk, these look lovely af and I wanna try them on my Altmer. Maybe someone else will want to try these too.

Modular Bandoliers and Pauldrons for Males. Pretty simple and to the point. Haven’t tried it since it wouldn’t go with my elf’s more refined bitchy tastes.

Bad Dog’s Skimpy Clothes SE. Some skimpy outfits for guys that were converted over to SE apparently not too long ago.

Bodyslide and Outfit Studio. So none of the stuff listed above is to your liking. That’s where this comes in. Thing is you actually CAN convert female armors and clothes for male use. So download the armors and clothes you wanna use and throw them and the body meshes you use into Outfit Studio. I myself am still learning how to go about doing this and the tutorials out there are kinda hard to come by. Try this video. I followed it and managed to convert a female outfit to fit on a male body I was using. Still need a lot of practice though but am working on it.

As far as makeup goes you can edit the colors of your character’s eyeshadow, eyeliner, cheeks and lips but with ECE or RaceMenu you can edit the colors further. May need to do some extra hard tweaking some choices though, not gonna lie. If I find a much better option I’ll post it.

I’m currently trying to find how the heck to get male characters to wear heels or if there’s a mod that has it. Like, that’s the last thing I need to make clothes complete. I’ll get back to this when I find it.

*Animations:

FNIS PCEA2 - Player Exclusive Animations (Dynamic) SE. So you got your character, you’ve dressed them and done up their hair and all that and to this point it’s all come together perfectly...until your femme male/enby character or your butch female/enby character starts walking and standing idly by and the poses and animations are completely and utterly wrong. Why is he walking like an angry gorilla? Why is she walking like a Victoria’s Secret model down the walkway? Can you switch their animations?

YES!!!

PCEA2--and yes, you will need FNIS to get this working--allows you to make animation changes to only your character. You can even add and/or remove which animation packs you want your character to use! I’ve just barely begun testing this mod as well as adding some specific packs for my Altmer and the pretty female idles works like a charm for him. I downloaded FNIS Sexy Move SE to try this out on him and see if it works but according to Fore it should work as long as you installed everything correctly and ticked the appropriate box to activate the animation pack you want. I’m not entirely sure if you can customize the choices given by each animation pack, probably something as simple as deleting the animations you don’t want and leaving the one you do want. I’ll have to test this further.

*Gameplay and Voices:

Simply Gay Letters. Simple and sweet little mod that adds some letters in certain places all over Skyrim tying certain NPCs to other NPCs. The hinted at couples are all the mod author’s headcanons so if that bothers you I suggest moving on.

Queering Skyrim - Blueflower Necklace. Basically it stops female NPCs from showing interest in your male character when wearing an amulet of Mara. Queering Skyrim - Lavender Menace Necklace does the exact same thing but for female characters.

Same Sex Perks - A Lover’s Insight - Agent of Dibella - Allure. Y’all remember Confirmed Bachelor from New Vegas? Remember how no Beth game has put it in their games again but are totally adding some lazy attempts to include us LGBTQ+ folks? The author has a pretty clear and easy to understand description of the mod in the page. There’s also Gay Insight - A Lover’s Insight Tweak which does the same as the other one but much simpler. I guess it’s up to you and your tastes when it comes to which one to use. I myself am using Same Sex Perks since it adds other perks.

Player Voicesets for SSE - Custom Voice Version. I downloaded this but I haven’t installed it yet. If I understood correctly this lets you change your character’s voice to any of the in game voices. My advice? Go into the page and read everything.

PC Head Tracking and Voice Type SE. The reason I haven’t installed the previous mod is because I have THIS one installed because of the head tracking but it also comes with an added voice feature so this might clash with the other one. I still need to test whether they do the same thing or not.

Skyrim - Player Re-Voiced Series. CaseyTheVA was kind enough to make a bunch of voices for your character. Just your character. I’ve tested these on Xbox and they are legit really freakin’ good! They seem to have added a lot more since the last time I checked. Unfortunately these are only available on beth.net or for Old Skyrim on the Nexus. You could just download them from the game’s mod page and remove the files and upload them back into the game using whatever mod manager you use. I did this with Cheat Room. Or you can port them yourself from Nexus. Honestly the quality alone is worth all the trouble.

[shikai-the-storyteller]

Cyberverse watch! Episodes 1-10

EPISODE 1

Bee you are ADORABLE

The cartoons always seem to start off in the middle of a desert huh

Lmao this is mean but imagine if bee missed the ju-- OH NO I WAS JUST KIDDING BEE

BUMBLEBEE IM SO SORRY I WAS JUST KIDDING, I SHOULDN”T HAVE MADE THAT JOKE

Gosh I’m so glad Windblade seems like one of the main three, like, she’s one of the main people in the intro and everything

Oh man we’re getting right into the bakstory huh

THERE”S TINY PERCY

“We couldn’t be sure if it’d actually work” Windblade says as she jumps through it without any concern or sense of self-preservation

AW SHE HUGGED BEE Windblade is so cute

IS THAT...SKYWARP

It’s so hard to tell the seekers apart

AW MAN I LOVE WINDBLADE’S SWORD And I love that her wings are retractable that’s so cool

STINGER that’s a new ability for ol’ Bee

OH THAT”S THUNDERCRACKER alrighty, sorry bud, I always think you should be green for some reason

JEEZ LOUISE WINDBLADE THAT CORTICAL PSYCHIC PATCH

I wonder if Windblade is still a Cityspeaker in this show :O

oh ANNNND THAT”S THE END OF THAT EPISODE man I forgot they were only 11 minutes. Alright, what the heck, let’s do some more

EPISODE 2

Alright I’m pretty sure that pretty purple seeker isn’t Skywarp but  idk what her name is yet

Aw grumpy Bee is cute

HER FANS JUST FLEW OFF???? WE’RE JUST PLAYING FAST AND LOOSE WITH THESE DESIGNS HUH I gotta say I’m a fan

“I’m going to create a distraction while you--” *camera zooms out to show Bee’s wandered off* I LOVE THEM

Yeah Windblade may not be a Cityspeaker in this series but she’s definitely a babysitter lmao, poor gal

OH SHE IS A CITYSPEAKER THAT”S AWESOME I wasn’t sure if they’d keep that part of her backstory :’) I’m so glad

Awww they hugged again :’)))) Windblade and Bee’s friendship is so cute!!

AAWW AND AGAIN!!! GOSH I LOVE THEM “We were friends once” “We still are” WEEPS!!!!

EPISODE 3

Windblade: BUMBLEBEE STOP DRIVING SO BADLY IM TRYING TO MONOLOGUE

Windblade: I’m going to plug into your brain with this cortical psychic patch and access your memories Bumblebee: I don’t believe this woman’s ever gone to medical school

Lmao way to sum things up Bee

TRIFORCE CUBE ALLSPARK

I wonder if the Allspark swallowed up / locked away his memories AH and as soon as I started typing that some weird glowing stuff started happening lmao

Ah and there’s Starscream, the dork

Man had Saling not warned me about Peter Cullen not voicing Optimus I would’ve been totally caught off-guard by that. Man, I hope Mr. Cullen is doing ok

I DON”T KNOW WHY BUT MEGATRON SAYING “AHAHA OPTIMUS PRIME” MADE ME LAUGH SO HARD

STARSCREAM TOOK OFF HIS WINGS AND THREW THEM WTF

LMAO SHE JUST TRIPPED HIM OFF A LEDGE #Get rekt Starscream

SCARY LADY WHO THE HECK IS THAT

SOUNDWAVE

MY BOY!!! IT”S HIM THERE HE IS!!! I JUST GASPED

SOUNDWAVE I LOVE YOU SO MUCH!!! YOU”RE DOING SO GOOD

OH MAN AND HE CAN TALK???? SOUNDWAVE BABY BOY!!!!!

OUCH poor Optimus

Optimus: Good thing I was a pitcher in my middle school’s football league *chucks Allspark through the space bridge*

EPISODE 4

That Allspark looks so much like a dice....I wonder what would happen if they rolled a nat 20 on it lmao

GRIMLOCK??????

WHEELJACK?????

lmao wheeljack looks like such a dork I love him

OH MY GOSH IS THAT CHROMIA??? SCREW THESE GUYS, THERE”S MY GIRL!!!!

Lmao I love that Windblade’s essentially “Kingdom Hearts: Chain of Memories”-ing Bee’s memories

Optimus: Meet back here in 20 astrocycles Grimlock: Sure thing! *whispers to bee* What the heck is an astrocycle Bee: *Shrugs*

Bee: I don’t know, but this place is the pits I LOVE HIM?????

It’s so weird hearing “intellectual” Grimlock lmaooo

Bee: *grumbles* Optimus would’ve thought that was a funny joke YOU ARE PRECIOUS

Optimus: Bee, watch your footing, the ground is starting to shake Bee: Thank you for that wonderful observation, Captain Obvious

Those bugs are making such cute sounds as they attack them that’s so cute

Aw Optimus, you’re such a good guy, what a sweetheart

Dang, they have a lot of autobots on that ship

UH THEY SHOULD LEAVE AT LEAST ONE PERSON AWAKE

EPISODE 5

Aw man the snow and mountain background in this episode look so pretty

WHY IS BEE HOLDING A GOAT SO CUTE

Bee: They were very kind. They took me in as one of their own WHY! ARE! YOU! SO! PRECIOUS!!!!!

Windblade: You want a what? What is a food processor? THEY”RE SO CUTE!!! GOSH I LOVE THEM 

oh man the backgrounds on this show are absolutely beautiful

Man, you know what it’s so frickin cool that Windblade’s essentially the main character of the show (plus Bee, but mostly her) :’)

“I thought they left all the useless bots on Cybertron” “Clearly not, if you’re here” OH SNAP

Bee’s just sitting on the ship watching bad human TV while Windblade’s off risking her life lmao, I love him

Slipstream is such a moron, why would you throw a flier off a CLIFF

SHE”S A FLIER

I love how Windblade says “Ugh, I was attacked” as if it’s just an inconvenience and not a huge deal

EPISODE 6

OHHH IS THIS GLADIATOR MEGATRON

YEAHHHH IT IS

AHHHHHH BEE HIGH-FIVED SHOCKWAVE, THAT”S SO CUTE I was wondering what the context was behind that

OH MAN THERE’S ARCEE AND RATCHET

AHHH AND THERE”S SOUNDWAVE They’re all standing beside him!

MEGATRON JUST SAID “TIL ALL ARE ONE” IM CRACKING UP

Optimus: I do not intend to start a fight Bee: What if he doesn’t listen? Optimus: He will listen to me 8′((((( and so it begins </3

Lmao also:  Optimus: I don’t intend to start a fight Optimus two seconds later: *chucks a bot*

OH MAN SHOCKWAVE LOOKS SO INTIMIDATING I LOVE THAT

“The file clerk is here to air his grievances” OHH it’s interesting to see what sort of backstory they’re giving Optimus in this universe

Megatron: You are wasting your time Optimus: It is never a waste of time to speak to an old friend I AM CLUTCHING MY CHEST,  YOU GUYS ARE KILLING ME RN

GOSH THIS IS THE MOST DRAMATIC BREAKUP EVER THIS IS KILLING ME IM SO SAD

That one lady Decepticon: *grabs onto Bee and flips him over her head* Me: *CONFLICTED HEART EYE EMOJI????*

SOUNDWAVE!!! IM LOVE YOU!!!! I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU!

GOSH I AM RENDERED INCAPABLE OF COHERENT THOUGHT OR SPEECH WHEN HE COMES ONSCREEN

Bee: Megatron may have torn out my voicebox, but he can’t keep me from talking. I love to talk! Talk talk talk talk.... Windblade: *laughs* Shut up! *weeps into my hands* This friendship is so wholesome

EPISODE 7

AW Decepticon ships have pong on their ships that’s adorable

What is the deal with this cube...is it a person....

AW IS THIS THEIR FIRST MEETING, THAT”S SO ADORABLE, gosh, what a dorky way for Windblade and Bee to meet

IT”S A SPORT OH MY GOSHHHH that’s amazing, I don’t think I’ve ever seen any sort of Cybertronian sports, that’s so cool! I always wondered what kind of sports / games they’d be into

lmao Starscream is so unimpressed with Windblade for liking the game

Ahh Windblade’s taller than him! That’s so cool!

LMAO Bee: You seem different. You’re not like other jets

GOSH THIS EPISODE IS LITERALLY MEAN GIRLS BUT WITH GIANT ROBOTS THIS IS HILARIOUS

Lmao yeah Starsream, because no one’s going to notice the cube is suddenly red instead of blue

AW NEITHER OF THEM REMEMBER HOW TO PLAY CUBE that’s adorable

EPISODE 8

Ugh, there really aren’t any good places to watch episode 8 so I’m watching it all broken up

YO VELOCITRON EXISTS IN THIS UNIVERSE NICEEEE It’s so cool seeing the colony planets!!

YO VELOCITRON LOOKS SO C

OH MY GOSH THERE’S HOT ROD!!!! I LOVE HIM OH MY GOSH BLURR IS HERE TOO!!!!

HOT ROD!!!! RODDY!!! YOU SOUND SO CUTE I LOVE YOU!!!!

Wait wtf is that evil wheeljack??? WHO IS THAT oh wait Plague of Rust??? that doesn’t sound great

“HOT DOG”

I really like Bee’s voice ahhhh he got such a great voice actor

Hot Rod and Blurr’s banter is so fun, that’s really great, and Bee’s like an excitable little kid!!! I love him!!!!

Blurr you stupid twunk, you gotta get out of there THAT RUST IS SPREADING SO FAST

OH NO HIS WHEEL GOT SOME RUST ON IT

OH SHOOT THEY’RE REALLY GONNA KILL BLURR HUH

DANG DUDE WELL OK THEN

EPISODE 9

Nicccce good friends sparring

WHO IS THIS CREEPY MULTIPLE EYED GIRL oh her name is Shadow Striker

*MEANINGFUL SILENCE AT THE WAY THEY STRUNG OPTIMUS UP*

“Ugh, I don’t even like being alone in the room with him” “I don’t like being left alone with you!” LMAO

Bee is so cute, he’s trying to psych himself up

LMAO THE GUARDS ARE TALKING ABOUT THEIR PREFERENCES AND THEIR BOSS that’s so cute what losers

AW MAN I thought Bumblebee was gonna hug Optimus that would’ve been cute

There’s so many seekers in this series!

Man I wasn’t sure what I’d think of Cyberverse but I’m really enjoying myself! It’s such a cute heartwarming show!

...I say, right as Shadow Striker attempts to do a murder / suicide thing with Bumblebee

“What’s your problem with me?!” I MEAN YOU DID BLOW HER UP BUMBLEBEE, CAN YOU BLAME HER FOR BEING MAD

EPISODE 10

Epic space battle! 

BEE YOU DON”T HAVE A SPACE-FARING ALT MODE WHAT ARE YOU DOING

MACCADAMS

THAT”S...DEFINITELY NOT HOW I THOUGHT THAT WAS PRONOUNCED

RIP buff Rung theory, you will be sorely missed

RATCHET!!! GOSH HE DOES SOUND LIKE A WEIRD NEW YORKER that’s an interesting take on his voice! I wonder how they decided on that

SOUNDWAVE!!! SOUNDWAVE I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I WOULD DIE FOR YOU!!! AND HE EVEN HAS BACKUP DANCERS!!! Of course the crowd is going wild for him

AW MEGATRON AND OPTIMUS *whispers* datenight

WHEELJACK AND SHOCKWAVE AW THAT”S SO CUTE They’re both dorky science nerds / proud papas to the shocklets and OH MY GOSH DID SHOCKWAVE JUST LAUGH THAT”S SO CUTE

Gosh I love seeing the bots talking about sports that’s adorable

MACCADAM IS TALKING ABOUT THE FUTURE goshhh. I still see buff Rung but actually getting to meet Maccadam is pretty neat

DEADLOCK AHHH aw he’s so timid!! I love him :’) 

CHROMIA!!! I LOVE HER!!! And aww she’s making the same argument she does in the comic

OH NO DEADLOCK POOR GUY what a sweetheart, he’s just out here doing his best 

YOOOO MACCADAM THAT”S SICK AS HELL, IM SCREAMING

THIS DUDE DEFINITELY TAKES AFTER HIS PAPA RUNG

I need to draw Mac and Rung together, I NEED to see them hanging out

“To friendship” AW THAT”S SO PRECIOUS GOSHHHH

I CAN”T WAIT TO SEE MORE OF THIS SHOW I LOVE IT

[thewritingsofjustinroy]

July 30, 2018

Dear Janis, I have a very comforting weakness. Pizza, soft drinks, ice cream, pancakes, fried pickles, chocolate, cookies, processed meats, fig bars, bread, sugar substitutes, fruit-flavored candy, processed cheese, booooooooooze, fast food, “diet” anything, and sugar-sugar-sugar. Those are just  a few of my favorite things. 

I always envy people who make comments like, “Man, I just ate a bowl of ice cream, and I feel like complete shit.” 

Do you know what happens to me when I eat a bowl of ice cream? I feel AMAZING! In fact, I feel so amazing, I’ll consume another bowl of ice cream. And then you know what happens next? Suddenly, I’m in the mood for “something else sweet,” and I’m soon foraging through my pantry for any kind of candy, cookie, or pastry in sight.  

Something else happens to me after I gorge on junk food that doesn’t seem to happen to others: I feel happy. Not just happy; I feel comforted, and warm, and so magically satisfied. It’s so wonderful, and effortlessly attainable, and I absolutely love it. Then, after a while, the feeling fades and my hunger grows, and then I’m back to my kitchen, or to the nearest window of a fast food restaurant.

For the longest time, this was perfectly reasonable for me. I mean, I tell myself I’m not morbidly obese, and my health isn’t in any kind of clear and present danger. Plus, why would I ruin one of the few constant sources of happiness I have in my life? For years, I have been telling myself that this isn’t a problem. Yeah, I see my weight fluctuating from ‘twunk’ to ‘chub,’ and bitch about my weight constantly, and yet I still do nothing. And, yeah, I’ll exercise for a few weeks, and switch to a sugar-free creamer, but I know full-well that I’ll be back in the butter in no time, and convincing myself it’s perfectly fine. 

Mind you, I don’t hate healthy foods at all, but I also don’t crave broccoli like I do bread; I don’t hanker for hummus like I do for chips and salsa; and I certainly don’t desire water like I do an ice cold glass of Diet Pepsi.  I  don’t even go out of my way to thump melons, or smell a head of lettuce before tossing them in my shopping cart. “I’m busy,” I tell myself, “I don’t have time for that.” Eight times out of ten, if the food I’m shopping for it’s frozen and quick to make, I won’t glance twice at it.  

Something has changed recently for me, though. Food still makes me happy, yet this sense of dread about the way I’ve been eating has been increasingly growing inside of me (along with the fat). Guilt, even. (Gut, too) Regret, definitely. And, no, it wasn’t the scale that triggered it. It was the calendar.

I am almost 30 years old, and I’m eating like a thirteen-year-old. It’s time for me to publicly admit that I have a problem. 

My name is Jack Roy, and I am addicted to junk food.

I don’t know how to get excited for healthy foods; I don’t know how to stay motivated to frequent a gym. To be honest, when I’m eating a healthy dinner, I almost always think of how that “healthy choice” will allow me to devour a box of fudge pops shortly thereafter, and “be okay.” And, to be even more honest, I  really freakin’ hate exercising, because it is difficult, I can never see results fast enough, and it makes me feel like a constant failure.  

I need help; I need to know how you stay motivated and manage a healthy lifestyle. How do you say no to a bucket of fried chicken and not feel un-American? How do you find a workout routine without blowing money on a fitness trainer and a gym membership I never utilize? How do you go day- by-day planning the right meals, fighting those bad cravings, and powering through your workout routine? 

I do not want to spend my 30s in and out of a doctor’s office, or watching my waistline grow any wider; I don’t want my happiness coming from a bag of candy; and I especially don’t want to continue making excuses for my weaknesses and terrible choices.

I know I want my 30s to be about growing in my career, experiencing college, settling down with the person I love, saving for our future, and truly enjoying a completely healthy and active lifestyle. I just don’t know where to start. 

End of rant, Janis.