#okbay

[inventedfangirling]

My friends i watched love for love's sake and I swear i don't have a fckin clue where even to start.

I know a lot has been said about the show already and i know a LOT more would be said about in the future, but i just can't help adding my own two cents to one of the most thought-provoking, moving and brilliantly executed pieces of art i have ever seen.

I'm not gonna go on about just how much I loved Tae Myungha's character and how he is one of the most interesting people I've seen on screen in a long time. I'm not gonna talk about how unbelievably squishable Yeowoon is and how his duality totally ruined me that I need him to get into my pocket and NEVER leave. And oh I need him to put Myungha in his pocket while at it. I'm also not gonna talk about precious 'of course i'm gay, i've always liked girls, you don't know how to be loved' Sangwon is to me, cos if i start I can promise you I will most certainly never stop.

So for the sake of the rest of this post, I'm moving on. (NOT REALLY THO)

I just LOVE LOVE LOVE all the interpretations that people are coming up with, LOVE LOVE LOVE the show for filling in the gaps but LOVE it more for still leaving room for pretty thought-flowers to bloom around.

You know those artworks or puzzles that have something obvious hidden in a maze of confusion and haze until somebody points out the pattern, you zoom out and realize wow it was this clear all along?? That's a LOT of what watching the show felt like to me. The pattern being how inexplicably inter-connected Myungha and Yeowoon are. Not because they are each other's blorbos, but because why they are eo's blorbos. Why they don't care for each other from a sense of sympathy, but from empathy, despite not knowing the depth of their connections explicitly.

Eventhough we do see glimpses of it from the start, it only gets more clear later how Myungha and Yeowoon really are mirror versions of eo. How the first time Myungha sees Yeowoon he's stopping him from killing himself, and then we later find out that Myungha ends up killing himself. How both of it was triggered by a series of disappointments in life, starting with a troubling family and ending with a grandmother who passes away. Of how both of them seem to really have no one else to call their own in the world. Of leading very lonely depressing lives, that seem to never have a glimpse of hope. How both of them seem closed off, but inside they really are so fragile it hurts to perceive the depth of their feelings. It all comes and hits you once you've taken the whole show in and have gotten a few 1000 seconds to think about it.

We start off with myungha's character wanting to make his blorbo's character happy, and he's in it cos he cares about him, he doesn't have to think about himself. A 'pathetic' character experiencing a lot of pain, what's not to love, Myungha thinks, not realizing that it's his own mirror self that he is feeling so much for. Myungha sees Yeowoon's problems as someone from outside and is therefore able to objectively look at it, and approach it proactively, taking so many steps to help him, my favourite (and arguably most important) of which is the effort he puts in to help form yeowoon a friend circle. Something that he couldn't do for himself cos he never even considered a possibility of that. Why would anybody want to be around him? He ruins everything right?

And then to go on despite believing that, to falling in love, to deciding to choose to save both his grandma and yeowoon, finally FINALLY taking control into his hands even if for a bit to say what he wants, to spending the last few days together, to breaking up cos he just thinks the worst of himself, cos he doesn't know better. And then to the eternal darkness, where moments before leaving, just like in his real life, he realizes he wants in, he wants to live, he wants to love, but more importantly this time, he wants to try being loved. Even if it's difficult, he wants to try.

I love how eventhough the show is heavily Myungha focused, we get meaningful dynamics with multiple characters. Round eyed gasp inducing moments dont just belong to the two mains but also to sangwon whose line to myungha post the stalker incident just ruined me and really set the tone for whatever the show was later revealed to be all about.

I love how complicated the narrative got while still telling a more or less coherent story, how in hindsight, a lot of it makes even more sense now. How as Myungha gets closer to yeowoon his self-hating tendencies manifest in the form of debuffs and errors, because of his own brain's inability to perceive himself as somebody deserving love. His childhood trauma and the numerous rejections life has given him, because of the kind of person he turned out to be because of those rejections, all appear to stand in his way of happiness, as if he can't help being a bundle of sadness and a harbinger of problems. Even as he says he doesn't believe in destiny or fate. Or as we initially are made to believe in the game as, yeowoon's happiness, when in reality this was never about yeowoon at all. Yeowoon never existed in the first place and in "real" life, he never does.

I was blown away by how Myungha is in fact no longer in the mortal world but that fact doesn't hurt as much as that he would have to leave a world where he could finally feel happiness, feel loved, feel cared for, even if he consciously tried avoiding them. They still came to him, they still cared for him, they still fiercely wanted to protect him, (Cos he is just a tiny meow meow, who has been hurt a lot in his life, who wouldn't wanna caress and nurse him back to health HUH) just as much as he wanted to protect them.

And coming to the question of what's the game, where is it happening and who orchestrated it? It's definitely set in the afterlife or the limbo between life and the life after. It could be the author friend doing it, or the author friend has given myungha's brain the power to control the game OR of course the possibility that this has all been happening in myungha's head the whole time.

Whatever it is, the whole point has been to take Myungha from a person not wanting to live his life, feeling so devoid of love and happiness, to a journey of love and friendship, of the importance of fostering connections, of making efforts, of helping others, but equally of letting others help you, of putting your hand out and asking for that help. And in my head I love it most when I think of it as entirely Myungha orchestrated. Of it being a desperate cry of pain to himself, from himself, to save himself. Yeowoon and the game and the missions and all of it was for him to see himself in ways he never allowed himself to be seen as, to take care of himself in ways he never has, to love himself like he has never known to. To finally run towards himself, even if pathetic and sad, the Cha Yeowoon of the game, the person waiting at the end of the finishing line was the Tae Myungha in him all along.

You know that tumblr quote 'do it for her' but its about your future self, right? Myungha rooting for Yeowoon is sort of like that? When he's protecing him, he's protecting himself? When he's cheering for him, he's actually cheering and rooting for himself? When he's loving him, he makes space and place to love himself?

I just love the idea of a (self) love story.

Eitherway Yeowoon x Myungha supremacy.

Extreme(ly accurate?) Interpretations apart, Love for Love's Sake is truly one of the, if not THE finest (self) love story I might have ever seen.

As a person who avoids fics/books with mcd or shows with tragic endings, it felt absolutely revolutionary to me that my biggest joy and relief came from the fact that the main character is dead (the thought of myungha having to leave the game was too much to handle) and he gets to live in this game where he has a cute boyfriend, a supportive, caring friend group and his grandma back. it wasn't the game that was temporary or non-existent, it was actually his life outside. And that's not bad? Cos this is a story and Myungha isn't real, but as real as he is, he got his happy ending.

The show taught us to love, to see love, to be loved and to share that love. It told us that maybe the afterlife is a videogame simulation where we all get to live in friendship and love forever, with our blorbo and our friends. There are a lot worse lives to live. And I'm glad he found it in himself, enough love, courage and hope to write himself a better one :')

[madmaryholiday]

doctor visit went well.

i got a referral to physical therapy for both my knees and my neck, and the doctor didn't even pester me about losing weight.

still trying to figure out how to break it to my mother that i don't plan to go on a diet.

anyway, things are moving along, and i have a good baseline for future bloodwork to be compared against, which was my initial goal anyway.

also got to tell my mother that my cholesterol IS high, yes, but it's not Concerning. it's something to monitor over the years and, if it's still this high when i'm 50, i'll probably need to start medication THEN.

i'm gonna go do something mindless for the next few hours while i decompress.

[zinzimmerzee]

drew my friends sona for him to draw tsumugi.. IM STILL WAITING!!!!! HEJEDAD (first pc art bythaway!!)

[hypnagogics]

LOSER!ELLIE COLLECTION

[LEGEND]: ✄ = nsfw | ♤ = requests

"PINING" MINI-SERIES

ONE ✄

TWO ✄

PENDING...?

MISCELLANEOUS

NO, TELL ME MORE ♤

BEACH DAY

WHINY (wtf do i call this) ✄

☆: not reallyyy a series, but collection of all works featuring my version of loser!ellie!! i like to call her "pathetic" or "ultra" loser, think loser!ellie x100. wanted them all in one place, it's all one au i suppose. (to those who say "loser!ellie isn't an au, she's just like that fr" this is in a modern setting, that's why i am calling it an au okay!) this'll be a mix of requests, blurbs, drabbles, series, oneshots, basically whatever stars her! gonna update it whenever something new is out, happy reading! :D LOSER!ELLIE SUPREMACY. ITS CANON. okbai have fun.

[4kiraa]

fave genre of boys are the ones that are so delulu for their crushes it’s actually concerning.

CUZ IM TIRED OF SEEING FICS WITH IT BEING THE GIRLS THAT ARE DELULU!! I OBJECT!!!!

warnings: just fluff :3

Delulu boys that cause their friends to have full in brain aneurisms whenever he talks about you .

“Bro did you see the way she looked at me during class today? istg she wants me”

“that’s cuz you were starring at her like a perve-”

“SHE WANTS ME IM TELLING YOU”

delulu boys who spend a concerning amount of time harassing you and any boy that comes into contact with you.

*insert picture of guy that was taking to you

“bea you cheating on me? with this fool?”

“bea? i’m not your bea😭”

“how are you gonna say that when we’re e literally married with 3 kids🤨”

“i- gtfo. you wanna get blocked again?”

“i’m sorry ma’mm”

delulu boys that literally cry their eyes out to you and his friends when he heard a rumour that you were dating someone.

“i can’t believe it, after everything we’ve been through-“

“stfu you a grown ass man crying about a girl who don’t even want you” his friends would rudely say.

delulu boys who decide to call you confronting you about said rumour, only for you to shut it down quickly and tell him it wasn’t true

“so i still got a chance?” he would ask in a desperate tone.

“hmm, maybe” tease

he grinned with excitement. already knowing he would think about this all day.

delulu boys who FINALLY work up the courage to ask you out after the constant harassment from his friends and was shocked when you said yes

“wait, can you repeat that? i wasn’t thinking just know, i frl thought you said yes”

you rolled you eyes smiling you yourself at his silliness. “i did”

his eyes widened with shock. sure he was dreaming of this day for over what…8 months, but he never knew it would actually happen

“”but…you’ve always seemed uninterested!”

“that’s because you’ve never actually asked me out you’ve always just flirted. i was waiting for you to make a move already”

his face flushed red. embarrassed that a simple “pleasegooutwithmeprettyplease” would’ve made you his a while ago.

you smiled at his red face placing a kiss on his bright red cheek “i would’ve been yours a while ago if you had just asked” it took all his composure to look you in the eyes after the kiss but nonetheless he worked up the courage to say these simple words “then will you be mine?”

delulu boys who worship the very ground their girlfriend walks on with full on heart eyes. spoiling her rotten. he doesn’t care if friends constantly remind him about how he had negative rizz before dating you and how down bad he was. He was just happy to have you even if you tease him about how he was before.

bro this ending was actually ass bruh. i was writing ts in class and the mfing fire alarm went off so i was too lazy to make a decent ending😭😭 okbai

[peachsukii]

I’ve been thinking about Umemiya this past week. The leaves are changing here, but the weather isn’t quite cold enough yet. I look forward to the days where it starts to get cold and I can start wearing a coat. I know that on days that I’ll forget my coat, he’ll offer me his jacket so I can stay warm.

We’ll take a short hike on a trail to observe the trees and their changing colours. During our walks we’ll hold our hands and swing them. I’ll likely make an attempt to walk on a trail of rocks and nearly fall, but he’ll catch me. Despite the weather, Ume would be excited to go home to check his garden and see if there’s anything that I can use for dinner tonight.

Okbai.

Awwww!! I could see him taking walking in the fall and being so excited about the leaves. He strikes me as someone who would be able to tell you all about why and how they change, too! All while holding your hand and smiling away. :)

[escapetheslaughters]

That’s ok, I’ll just get another one. *peaces out*

Okbai

[soundsofastar]

places a bunny on2 ur hand.. give one 2 netzie too okbai ill sleep now (its maimaimelle btw.. just on main/sim blog)

OH MY GOSH !!!! A LITTLE BUDDY??+?!? FOR ME!!!?

[the-scandalorian]

Hi hi hello there, I’ve been lurking for a while as I’ve been consuming as much of your writing as I can but I had to finally message on 2 things:

1) not only is all of your writing DIVINELY EXQUISITE (your Din makes me swoon) but

B) something about the way your write Joel Miller just….makes me stare blankly at a wall and wanna cry cuz it’s so DELICIOUS.

“you realize just how utterly and completely he has you. That he’d burn the world for you if you asked. And you’d do the same for him.”

“It’s easy to surrender to someone who never lets you down—to someone who protects you with bared teeth, white knuckles, and no quarter.”

…..FUUUUUUUCK. I can’t quite describe how deeply this vibe has embedded into my brain. Call me Angelia Schuyler cuz I feel like I will never be satisfied until I have THAT. thank you for sharing your amazing talent with us and I can’t wait to read whatever else you’ve got. XOXOXO OKBAI

this ask is so kind, i am beaming

tbh i was pretty uncertain going into writing joel. he's such a complex character who changes so much over the course of the show. pre-outbreak joel, QZ joel, and post-Ellie joel are three very different manifestations of the same man, which makes him so intimidating (but also fun) to write. so the fact that you love my take on joel enough to send me this ask makes me endlessly happy

so, truly, THANK YOU

and as someone who started out as a lurker, i love that you came into my askbox! so happy to have you here 💜

also: i love this gif so much. that's exactly how i feel about joel

[satorhime]

lolly hey I need to tell you this. I hope I’m not weird 🫂, I hope you know that you’re canonically Gojo’s girlfriend in my head. Out of all the Gojo’s writers and blogs, the way you talk about him is so warm and sweet i know that he would be loved with you. you never badmouth him for clout or write him in a way that doesn’t do him justice. I know he’s not a real person, but you really make me forget that he is when I’m on your blog! Thank you for being you. Okbai

THIS JUST MADE ME UGLY BAWL WHAT IN THE WORLD <3333333 i’m really smiling ear to ear because this is quite literally the nicest thing anyone has ever said to me. thank u so much bbie u are sugary sweet and i hope u know uve made my week with this ask !!!!!!!!! pls have the loveliest day n the best year bc u deserve it OMGGGG my heart is beating so fast and my eyes are blurry as fuck PLSSSSS 😭😭😭

[prozac-shaped-urn]

*desperately fighting the urge to down half the bottle of my sleep gummies because of my triggered response of avoidance*

got a job offer(ish) today. they called and left a voicemail that they're interested in my credentials and want to know if i'm interested in an english writing tutor position. i am, but i only want part-time. so i called my dad.

for all intents and purposes, I AM 25 YEARS OLD when it comes to finances. i haven't had a real job in a decade and i know nothing of how all of that works. he gave me some pointers etc and i asked some stupid questions that really should've been intuited but alas i am a dumbass when it comes to this shit since i haven't had to do it........ ever.

imma call this guy back but basically

i feel like an absolute idiot

i feel so incredibly far behind in life that i can't even see my peers' backsides

i want to get my shit together - and i am, however slowly - but i don't want to over-promise things and i don't want to jump directly into a position that i don't know i'll be able to sustain long-term

i'm frustrated that my life didn't turn out the way my parents thought it would or that i thought it would

i wanna sleep, which is why i know i've been triggered (over what, idk. i'll have to dissect this later when i don't have a phone call to make and a meeting to attend in the next 15 minutes)

i'm embarrassed that i had to call my father to ask questions that i should've known the answer to years ago

i need to gtfo of here and do my work okbai

[nytloq]

hello yes i have once again found myself buried so deep in 35mm fandom that i dont know which way is up but i dont know anyone else who even knows what it is and im pretty sure my work bestie is sick of hearing me talk about it so like if you are also suffering as well pls lmk so we can cry hysterically over "cut you a piece" together okbai

[undergroundisstillpunk]

okbay :) headbnan. headban. henband. ill eat the hendband. -🐏

Good job kid!

[kydtyk]

Andit Okbay - 'Ti Gudeye ['ቲ ጉደየ] - New Eritrean Music Video 2018

I like how this thoroughly modern song keeps those traditional grooves.

[nanlanmoarchived]

//It's OOC because technically our characters haven't met yet. I don't know you all too well because we literally just started talking but I like what I see so far. You're kind and super easy to talk to and you put up with me with my sads and I appreciate that. You've earned my loyalty. AND I CAN'T WAIT TILL OUR CHARACTERS MEET. THANK YOU OKBAI.

I'm gonna kiss you on the forehead and there's nothin' that's gonna stop me tbh. 😘 You're the sweetest!! 💖💖

[prozac-shaped-urn]

Ahem. Guys.

They’re moving southward in their physical contact.

I’m out. Okbai

THEY'RE COMING BACK TO ME!!!!!!!!!!