#okay ik a bit abt him and just a bit but i think i'll like him regardless???

[leviscolwill]

sanctuary

pairing: jude bellingham x f1 driver!reader

summary: after an eventful singapore gp, the only thing you can think of is your comfy bed but your body has another plan and your boyfriend isn't happy about that. [wc: 1,6k]

req: Ferrari driver reader x jude where she feels a bit dizzy after a race and kind of faints when they get at the hotel, like just fluff with him taking care of her + CAN YOU WRITE JUDE ANGST THEN FLUFF IDC ABT THE SCENARIO JS JUDE ANGST IN JUDE X DRIVER READER 🙏🙏

contents: established relationship, charles is reader's teammate, ferrari being good au (impossible ik), reader faints, jude is a worried bf, barely has angst ngl 🏃��♀️, nothing else i think

note: i have no idea how to write about fainting and it probably shows. ALSO, i wrote most of this at 1am so i hope it makes sense (probably doesn't but we move😪)

now playing: sanctuary by joji (nectar)

usually you would say you absolutely loved singapore. the track was one of your favourites on the calendar and you practically counted down the days to this race. but this week was probably the most difficult of your entire career in motorsports. of course, marina bay had never been an easy race, and the weather conditions in singapore were only making it harder to handle. but this year, no number of ice bath and cold shower could appease the dizzying headache that plagued your weekend.

and to add to that, everyone at the team has been stressing you out about the championship. obviously, you were grateful that you could finally fight for one, ferrari had built the perfect car this season. but this came with a price, fighting against charles for the title. you were great friends with your teammate but you had to admit your relationship took a toll with the constant tension between the two of you throughout the season. anyone wearing a bright red kit kept reminding you that you needed to be careful on track, that if you crashed with anyone, but especially with charles, you'd be in great trouble.

thankfully your boyfriend joined you after qualifying, and made your weekend instantly better. he noticed something was wrong right away. of course, you told jude about your struggles but he didn't expect to find you in this state.

"maybe you shouldn't race tomorrow..?"

you took a glance at jude, laid down on the hotel room bed, to check if he actually meant what he just uttered only to find a very serious look on his face.

"yeah, i'll just call fred to tell him i'm feeling sick and don't care about the championship anymore, that's definitely the best choice i have." sarcasm dripped out of your words as jude rolled his eyes.

"just because you had a bad day, doesn't mean you have to give me an attitude." it was your turn to roll your eyes. you quietly got under the sheets and muttered a barely audible 'goodnight', clearly not having the energy to argue with him tonight.

as you closed your eyes you felt jude turn around to wrap you in his arms around you.

"i'm just worried for my girl, that's all." he said, softly kissing your hair. you turned around to face him, having to trace his face before finding his lips because of the darkness of the room, and pressed a quick kiss on his lips.

"i appreciate your concern, i really do. but this race is so much more important than a silly headache. i'll be okay." you kissed him again for good measure. "you're gonna have to trust me with this one."

"i always trust you." the two of you talked some more before falling asleep in each other's arms.

—

the only thing you could think of when you stepped out of your car was your bed. as expected the race had been particularly draining and truth be told, you didn't know if you would be able to stand on the podium in your state. you managed to score a satisfying p2, well it would have been more satisfying if charles wasn't standing on the highest step of the podium, with a 4-point difference before catching on you in the driver's standing.

when the whole team congratulated you on your results, it felt like you were in a fever dream, barely making out what was real and what wasn't. you didn't even notice jude talking to you before he snapped his fingers in front of you.

"are you okay ? should i take you to the medics ?" he asked in a worried tone.

"i'm alright... just need to get through the podium." which did not happen. you ran off stage as soon as the italian anthem stopped ringing in your ears. it was all too much, the heat, the noise, the exhaustion, the pressure. all too much to handle for you.

when you joined jude, he was already talking with your pr manager, telling her you wouldn't be able to do any media work right now. it was the truth, not a petty lie to get away with it. you genuinely felt even more lightheaded (if that was possible) at the sole thought of having to go through a dozen interviews.

seeing you barely standing straight must have conceived her, so soon enough you were on your way back to the hotel in a cab jude called.

you quietly laid your head on jude's shoulder. he barely said a word to you since the podium incident, only asking how you felt, if you drank enough water, and how many hours of sleep you had. you watched him as he typed things on his phone in total silence. you wondered if he was mad at you for putting yourself in such a situation or only worried. regardless, you felt a pang of sadness in your heart thinking about it before drifting off.

—

as soon as jude opened your hotel room's door, you felt your legs giving up on you, your hands found the wall to steady yourself. you could hear jude's voice but couldn't make out what he was saying, like you were underwater.

you tried making it to the bed, but you fell down on your knees and just propped your back against it, waiting a minute before getting up, to get your head to stop spinning uncontrollably.

"y/n. are you okay ?" you felt your boyfriend kneeling down next to you and could finally understand his words, but it felt like they were resonating in your brain, only worsening your headache.

"i'm fine, i'm fine... i just need a moment." you didn't want to worry jude more than he already was, although the weak tone of your voice alarmed him more than anything. you felt him shift around you, and caught a glimpse of him coming back from the bathroom before your eyes shut.

when you woke up, you were laid on the bed with a wet cloth on your forehead. and the first thing you saw was a wide-eyed jude handing you a glass of water.

"i thought about making you drink when you were... asleep? but i didn't want to drown you. so i waited for you to wake up." he was talking fast, too fast for you to fully understand his nonsense.

"hello to you too." your voice was still weak but you felt much better than at the race track. you quickly took a few sips of water before jude tried drowning you for good.

"what's that ?" you asked pointing at the cloth still laying on your face.

"some website said that's what you're supposed to do when your irresponsible girlfriend faints." you hid your face in your pillow at his accusatory words.

"no, but seriously y/n. do you have any idea of how worried i was ? imagine if something wrong happened. god, i knew i shouldn't have let you race..." his words had an angry tone to them and you were confused as to why jude was mad at you over hypothetical scenarios.

"but nothing wrong happened, i even got points. are you not proud of me ?"

"are you being serious right now ? you know i'm always proud of you, points or no points. but you think i'm gonna clap for you after putting yourself in danger like that ?" jude's tone got somewhat angrier but he kept going.

"fuck, when you fainted i already saw myself explaining everything to your mum. you can't take those risks, especially when you drive a fast car for a living. you can understand that right ?"

you felt tears well up in your eyes at his words, thinking about how worried he must have been this whole time.

"i'm sorry, it's just... i've been thinking about the championship a lot. i guess that clouded my judgment." you wiped away your tears quickly, before jude could notice them but it was too late.

"hey, hey, hey... you shouldn't be saying sorry to me, you probably spent a worse weekend than i did anyway. i'm not mad at you but at the situation, alright ?" his fingers stroke the wet spots under your eyes, wiping what was left of your tears away. "i'm proud of you, and happy for your points. but you're not winning a championship by making your dangerous job even more dangerous." his voice and his eyes were soft and you felt your chest get significantly warmer.

"you're right..." the room got silent for a couple seconds at your words.

"what was that ? i couldn't hear you babe" jude had a shit-eating grin on his face and you knew exactly what he wanted, and it almost made you physically sick to give him this satisfaction.

"i said... you'reright." you tried getting those terrible words out as fast as you could, but he wasn't happy with that.

"mmh mmh, that won't do... say it nice and loud for me love." you felt your face heat up, both in fluster and embarrassment at his words.

"you're right." your words had a defeated tone to them, but jude decided that would be enough by the way he didn't taunt you anymore.

he moved and got under the covers with you, even though you were gonna have to get up again as you were both still dressed. he just wanted to share this little moment of peace with you.

"you know, it's crazy how you drive the fastest car in the world but can't survive singapore's heat for a weekend." you playfully elbowed jude's ribs at his teasing.

you were grateful to have someone like jude to support you and your intense lifestyle, but also someone to talk about silly little things, legs tangled under the sheets.

[dumplingsfordays]

modern au - roommate hcs !

ft. Kazuha, Scara, Xiao, Zhongli, Diluc, Albedo

I'm backk~

I haven't wrote in a little bit so I'm sorry 😭

Anyways this is a random idea I had, idk how well my thoughts are gonna translate into words but we'll see ig

Also idk if you need a warning for this but Diluc's has a mention of man titties so... do what you want with that ig

Reader's gender not specified, and this is not proofread!! Apologies for any mistakes, feel free to message me and I'll fix them :)

Image credit!

But as always, thank you for reading <3

++++

kazuha

- omg this man 😭😭 he is (imo) the best roommate you could ever have.

- he'd probably be super nice when you two first meet and stay that way!!

- he wakes up at a fairly good time too, and if he knows that you're sleeping, he'll try to be as quiet as possible.

- he does his share (and often a little more, if he has time) of the chores consistently.

- kazuha even follows a schedule on when to do certain stuff - he writes it down in a calendar in the kitchen

- he does like to cook when he has some free time, and they don't always turn out amazing but the smell will have your mouth watering.

- his room is super neat!! It's very aesthetic and a little minimalistic, but not overwhelmingly so.

- and it's always clean!!!!!

- he mostly hangs around either in his room or the living room on a couch. Sometimes he'll come into your room, but he always knocks!

- he respects your privacy too 😍 this man is a treasure, treat him well

- he doesn't mind hanging out with you!! If you're into makeup, he actually likes to go makeup shopping with you and just chill while you pick out some stuff :)

- everyone thinks you're partners when you guys hang out, but kazuha doesn't seem to mind 🤭

scara (sorry it's a bit short, never rlly written anything abt him before 😭😭)

- he's a little turd but you still like him, and he gets confused because why haven't you moved out yet????

- he probably spends like 80% of his time away from the house (apartment? wherever you guys live basically), but he still manages to do his chores on time

- HIS EYELINER SKILLS. IK THIS IS A LITTLE IRRELEVANT BUT THEYRE SO GOOD OMFG

- anyways, he really likes watching movies super late at night, so when you join him 20 minutes in with popcorn, it's sort of a bonding time for you two

- he doesn't cook, so he orders takeout a lot... and what really surprised you is that after a week or so of living together, he started to order for both of you because "you were whiny that I didn't get you anything"

- (he actually does it bc he's trying to say thanks for putting up with him :))

- he goes to bed super late and wakes up super late. You have to deal with this by not making ANY noise when you do stuff in the morning or he will be very grumpy for like 2 days (you learned this the hard way 😭)

- on days when he's friendlier, he'll bring you stuff like plushies when he gets back. He'll say that Yae or Yoimiya asked him to give these to you, but you doubt that those two gave you twelve stuffed animals in the span of a month.

xiao (another short one 😭 just like his height)

- I mean... He's okay?? He just sits in his room a lot and I headcanon that he's kinda sorta a gamer so

- he doesn't mind doing chores for you if you can't, but he'll do them a little late because he's like that

- this man SIMPS for Chinese food, like I'm not joking. He doesn't know how to make it, but before moving in w you he searched up Chinese restaurants and that's one of the reasons he moved in lmao

- you guys don't really see much of each other a lot... but you always, always go on grocery trips together. Why? Because he seems to consistently forget the shopping list that you wrote down for him at home, on the kitchen counter, and if you go shopping for him, he complains that you didnt get the things he asked for (but he doesn't write you lists 👀)

- he does have his sweet moments too. If you play videogames, he'll play with you if it's multiplayer. If it's not - no worries, you'll both play it, sitting side-by-side.

- if you're not into videogames though, he does like learning stuff, especially from you. He thinks that you're a good teacher, and even if it's you teaching him how to make coffee (because he doesn't know and wants to learn), he'll keep persevering through it just for you.

- oh boy. Room time.

- his room isn't that bad, if you can look past the giant pile of Monster cans in a trashcan below his desk. It's often dark, with the blinds down, and if you're walking down the hallway, there's a 90% chance that you'll see green led lights shining through the gap beneath his door.

- speaking of his door, it's covered in those signs that say stuff like 'warning! no stupid people beyond this point' or 'dont touch me until I've had my morning Monster'. If you couldn't tell yet, he's obsessed with Monster.

- he streams on twitch, and he's pretty popular, so you'll hear screams of disappointment coming from his room quite often.

- but one sight that you'll never forget is when you went to bring him apple slices (did I mention that he likes apples??), you opened the door to him standing in front of his monitor in a maid dress 😭. According to him, this was a dare that his viewers had him do, and that you better not mention this to anyone!!

- he was so red when he was explaining it though 🤭🤭 you, being the kind soul that you are, swore on your heart to keep it a secret :)

zhongli

- omfg you KNOW this man likes having meals with you. That's such a random thought but hear me out.

- when you eat, he eats with you at the table. Even if you made something only for yourself, he'll whip something up for him and eat with you.

- ANYways he likes to save money so much that his room only consists of a mattress on the floor, a coffee table for a desk, a beanbag in the corner, and a bookshelf that is practically overflowing with books. You take pity on him, of course, and buy him another bookshelf, which he now treasures :)

- probably has a lot of plants around the house/apartment, and he takes care of them as if they were his children. There isn't a day when there isn't a bouquet of flowers sitting on the dinner table.

- if you're allergic to pollen, though, he'll make sure to buy plants, not flowers, like China Dolls or aloe vera or cactuses, whichever you like best 🤭

- he LOVES reading!! Whenever you come downstairs, you'll see him reading, and if you're interested, he'll recommend it or books like it. He does wear reading glasses and he looks really hot in them but don't tell him I said that

- he probably takes forty-minute showers, and the shower is chock-full of hair products. 2-in-1 shampoo?? Zhongli's never heard of it. He may be (nearly) broke, but he takes care of his hair.

- tbh I think he likes to bake bread. Idk if COVID is a thing in the modern au, but if it is, then he was probably one of the people that searched up 'how to make banana/sourdough bread' and fell in love with making it...

- I like to think that he has a nice and neat schedule for each day, and his sleep schedule specifically is so freakin amazing. He goes to sleep at around 9-10, and wakes up at 6am sharp 😭

diluc

- he also likes tea before bed (and any other time of day really). He loves the different scents of the tea and it calms him a lot, so be prepared for a ton of afternoon tea parties with him :D

- ok so we know that Diluc is super rich and stuff but let's just pretend that he roomed w you to save money-

- he works out. A lot. Usually in the morning and around 8pm, and he always goes to this super fancy private gym or whatever.

- and he KNOWS that you go 'ooga booga man titties' mode whenever you see his chest so that bastard is almost always shirtless

- "Diluc why are u shirtless??" "It's hot in here" "...it's like 65 degrees. How tf are you hot"

- no but he's nice though, don't get me wrong. He'll help you do stuff around the house that you can't and he always seems to be there to help. Can't reach something? Diluc's there. Can't open something because it's too heavy? Diluc's got you.

- he'll do chores, just not very well. Can't do the dishes manually at ALL, and if you do have a dishwasher (which he buys on the third day if you don't), he will fall to his knees and thank the gods.

- he has a 10-step skincare routine. His skin is flawless and you are a little jealous, but if you really want to use some of his products, he won't mind :)

- he can cook (but not desserts/pastries lmao). He's super good with the grill, if you want grilled meat or fish or veggies or anything, really. But if you don't want it grilled, he's just as happy to make it using another method!!

- super good at board games, he's especially amazing at monopoly. Nobody can beat him, and he's proud of it >:)

- you've never been in his room for some reason, but you expect that it's very modern and monochrome, with hints of red (obvi).

- he usually has kinda red eyes in the morning, though, and when you asked about it he said that he likes going for night drives, but you were a little suspicious

- you stayed awake one night and you could hear him exit, but no car noises 🤔 you still wonder on what's he's doing so late almost every single night...

- also speaking about cars, the neighbors are always shocked that there's a lamborghini parked outside of your residence (house, apt building, what have you) lmao

- they're always like "do you have a rich bf?? Who is he??" and you're like "nah he's just my roommate :D"

albedo

- this man!!! He's so big brain!!!

- he'll definitely help you with studying for literally anything. Computer science? He got you covered. Bio? Sign him up. Hell, even art? He's super good at it so he won't mind teaching you!

- but when I tell you that he consumes a lot of coffee, it's a LOT. Like 4-5 cups a day. You wonder how, and even if, he sleeps.

- he makes really good coffee too! He bought one of those super cool ones and the coffee he makes is legendary. No wonder he drinks it so often!!

- he barely eats simply because he has so much work, and you essentially have to force him to come downstairs. You make him eat lunch and dinner, and occasionally breakfast if he can. He's super grateful for it, because he sometimes doesn't realize his hunger until he sits down at the table and his stomach growls like a bear-

- he loves classical music, especially Debussy, and it's always playing in his room. You started warming up to it, actually, and now whenever you hear Debussy, you think of Albedo.

- speaking of his room, it's... kinda messy, actually. Think paper and pencils and eraser shavings everywhere. He does clean it up like two times a month, but the papers always reappear within a couple days.

- he really likes art, and he'll hang some of his faves around the house/apartment :) it honestly makes the whole space feel cozier

- does his chores VERY last-minute, but he feels bad about it. You always tell him that it's nothing to worry about, that he still does them, but he insists on trying his best to do them earlier, which you appreciate :D

- he actually uses you as an art reference sometimes, only if you're free for an hour though. He doesn't like paying for models to come in and pose so he saves money by asking you... or at least that's what he says 👀

- your main bonding time is when you go in his room (or vice-versa) and just chill. He likes your company more than he'd like to admit, and you sometimes catch him staring at you from across the room when you're laying on his barely-used bed.

++++

note : sorry if some characters are a little ooc 😭😭 I'm not too good at writing Diluc n Scara so... OH ALSO I would've included Ayato too but I feel like hes not really the type of person to room w someone (well bc he would def flaunt his wealth by buying a private mansion or smth)

[mobblespsycho100]

👍 kabru, heh

thank you so much mwahaha

1. Bottom Line by Dom Fera

I think this song is very Kabru in a this has big "customer service" vibes, lmao.

"Drive me somewhere you've been liking" -> hes a people pleaser, letting someone take the reins while he supports them and hangs back is kind of his thing. Even though he plans stuff out and chooses his words deliberately, sometimes he goes along with ppl's wants and expectations for him a bit too much...

"Order something I don't want, I'll drink it anyway" -> basically Kabru when he had to eat the harpy eggs Laios offered lmao. 'Right, i hate this so much this is Monster. okay. wow i need to kill you' hes literally triggered (in the ptsd term sense and not the. warped internet meaning of it) and he's still like okay ! i will dig in ! to prove a point ! so laios likes and trusts me! (... what point kabru . cmon man. )

"Take a little time, it's funny how you're fine when I'm away -> he needs to be needed. He needs to help others, save them even, to protect them from the tragedy he has experienced. He's used to being dismissed and he does swallow it and take it but ik he was so 🤨😧😠 abt laios ignoring him and all the attempts to get to know him... so its like take a lil tine its funny how ur fine when im away ... Kabru knows Laios is the closest to conquering the dungeon. and hes like. I rlly wanna help u do this but . ik ur probably fine without me (... man he makes me . so 😭)

"It's natural to see a bottom line with me / A bottom line I'll be" -> A bottom line in business is like the final total right. The sum of everything thats written at the bottom. The ultimate outcome... the core. The fate of the dungeon is something he wants to decide and get a say in as well. Even though he knows he isn't the one thats going to conquer it, he chooses to stop Mithrun from beating up Thistle and grabs him and they free fall into that pit. Because he decided, yeah, the fate of this dungeon the one to conquer it has to be us short-lived races/humans. He is such an action oriented character . He makes such decisions. He is so determined to make sure that Utaya doesn't repeat itself. Man.

Anyway that's song 1. moving on to song 2.

2. Smoke and Mirrors by Gotye

This entire song is So Kabru coded its insane to me . but I grabbed these lyrics from Verse 3 Because the last line specifically makes. me go crazy.

"You're a fraud, and you know it" -> the freaking masker . he is such a liar and he knows it... theres not much else to say here. Playing the hero, the saviour, while knowing he doesn't actually have the skills to defeat the dungeon but hes just so desperate . man

"And every night and day you take the stage" -> he should get an acting award fr... always adjusting his personality and carefully planning his steps with each person he interacts with man... also inchtresting to me that he gets to be more #real with Mithrun. thats a whole nother analysis can of worms I won't get into but like they rlly drove each other's character development...

"And it always entertains, you're giving pleasure" -> To quote Holm, Kabru is the typa guy who would do anything to get someone to like him akdjskhf hes so real for that...

"And that's admirable, you tell yourself" -> (kabru voice) im so cool for this ahaha everyone loves me (guy who genuinely fucking loathes himself) /ref

"And so you'd gladly sell yourself to others" -> smile of pain. I just think hes a real business man sometimes . Goodness Kabru stop being a charismatic salesman of your own personality im going to explode .

Right. we're on to the last one I guess...

3. Dear Arkansas Daughter by Lady Lamb

GENUINELY cannot really do this analysis lyric by lyric or I will go ... well. I'll go into the deep end but . like . right. anyway. this set of lyrics above aka the most popular line is very Kabru appearance. (Goodness i need to make an AMV of this. I will one day once the executive dysfunction stops fighting my autistic hyperfixation ass)

THIS WHOLE . SET OF LYRICS IS JUST BIG KABRU VIBES (SOURCE: JUST TRUST ME BRO)... His heart is full of swords... the sword fighter (he is proficient in many weapons)... im not big into tarot (or well i havent researched it much) but the annotations for these lyrics said that its referencing the Three of Swords tarot card, which represents painful sorrow. and like.. man like a fundamental sorrow in Kabru is so oughh its just so . real. and again i need a whole nother analysis post for this since this is already So long

Tie my hands & knock my knees. he is so stressed he is so . nervous all the time and these r like. the freeze . trauma response. to me. he goes freeze and fawn a lot (fawn not specifically with abusers per say but like people pleasing tendencies again) and like kind of visibly looking nervous and stressed out up before saying smth next is smth he does a lot I feel.

And like the vibe of like sinking to the sea with a heavy heart but also being someone who brings hope in a way to others (ex: Rin and Mithrun, he ends up being their anchor and helping them start like living with their lives after the burden of their traumas and hellish experiences) but Kabrus own traumas are so immense and then the person who rises . who foils him and who brings him hope is Laios. like a ripe red apple like. something bright and tempting and also dangerous (smth smth the forbidden fruit symbolism. theres so much . like Kabru that I can dissect with like Biblical symbolism themes but like anyway he sees Laios as both the key to humanity's victory against the dungeon and as sin / a distraction from his goal because Laios makes him do selfish things and its just AAAAHGHH rahhhh. man. im normal)

ANYWAY YEAH ... that wraps this up. Thank you for sending this ask ❣️💌 I am very normal abt Kabru of Utaya dungeon meshi

[conanssummerchild]

my own ranking of every rick and morty episode, inspired by the lovely @fandomwe1rd0 :3

sorry this is a bit scattered, the random quotes are just lines that i liked/found funny. i had to shorten all my reasonings by a fuck ton bcs i was just going on forever lmao, so if some things feel kinda cut off, that's why.

i binged all of rick and morty in like a week to make this, just to make sure the ranking was fully accurate to me and it took me way to long but i'm finally done !!

btw this isnt a ranking of which episodes are objectively the best, its very biased and just my personal opinions, im aware some epsiodes definitely shouldnt be as high as they are but a lot of them are just my comfort episodes 🤷

f tier: episodes i actively dislike, have little to no redeeming qualities.

71. rickdependance spray: audibly said "oh, fuck no." when i realised this was next. the rest of weird-ish episodes have some redeeming points but this one just has no plot relevance and isnt very funny.

70. raising gazorpazorp: main reason i dislike this episode is the end credit, it reminds me of when i was listening to family line and my dad insinuated conan was making it up and that if i got famous i'd do the same, like, no, if i talk abt what a shitty dad you are its bcs you were a shitty dad, do better. anyway i just thought it was an unfunny joke. due to daddy issues. also its just a boring episode.

69. a rickconvenient mort: summer and rick's storyline was ok but not enough to make up for how much i hate planetina. i liked beth in this episode. rick and summer's dynamic was nice too, but unhealthy.

e tier: episodes i don't dislike, just find boring/have bad elements but more redeeming qualities.

68. m. night shaym-aliens!: the little crystal wrestle was adorable. other than that not a super memorable episode.

67. rise of the numbericons: the movie: i didn't hate it but compared to the rest of s7 it was pretty weak. i think mr goldenfold is funny, but not enough to get his own episode. it would've been more entertaining if rick was in it lets be real, i missed him.

66. interdimensional cable 2: tempting fate: i care very little about jerry's penis. the interdimensional cable was good as usual though.

65. how poopy got his poop back: fine episode, not my fav. i liked seeing bp and squanchy again.

64. edge of tomorty: rick die rickpeat: "Damn, Morty, you're bad at maths, but I'm giving you an a-plus in confidence!" an okay episode.

63. rick: a mort well lived: pretty weak episode to follow solaricks. summer's die hard was good. some cool emotional components.

62. rattlestar ricklactia: "Hey, Morty, listen. I can tell you're pretty upset about the whole snake encounter thing, so I'll tell you what. I'm just gonna go ahead and avoid you for the rest of the day." rnm were kind of cute at the end. yk, until rick punched morty in the face :/.

61. the jerrick trap: sorry ik a lot of ppl love this episode but tho burger & fries were cute characters its not all that for me. memory rick's return, however, was all that. i love him.

60. childrick of mort: "Oh my god, grandpa, you fuck boy." rick being a space nerd <3. loved to see more of beth and rick together but other than that this episode was kinda mid.

59. amortycan grickfitti: honestly made me feel bad for jerry which isnt easy, i sort of liked rick here, he seemed reluctant to let the hell demons make fun of jerry, he still did, but even apologised with only a little prompting. can't say the same for beth. summer and morty were sweet in this episode, i wish we would get more of them.

58. rickmancing the stone: "I don't know why I'm crying." "Well... try crying 15% less?" not bad, i liked the emotional components.

57. mortynight run: again, not super memorable to me. the roy montage was good. You kind of wasted your 30's, though, with that whole birdwatching phase." the animation for the song was great.

d tier: mostly okay to good episodes with minor faults that i can look past in the general scheme of the episode.

56. one crew over the crewcoo's morty: fucked up what rick did to morty. and to mr pb, his life went to shit after this, bcs of rick.

55. night family: had some great moments, but wasnt my fav.

54. anatomy park: loved dr bloom, john oliver voiced him perfectly.

53. lawnmower dog: sweet scenes between rnm. liked the dream inceptor, loved scary terry, snuffles was good too but not as much.

52. claw and hoarder: special ricktims morty: "Are you gonna slay it?" "First off, i always slay it, queen. Secondly, yes." summer being on morty's side was nice. while the soul orgy was a bit weird, the rest of this episode was pretty entertaining which is why its higher up, sorry.

51. bethic twinstinct: jerry saying he would khs, not cool jerry fuck you. "You ladies discuss responsibility while i get stoned and play video games with your kids." the end 💀 i felt bad but it was funny lol.

50. final desmitation: maybe my fav ep of jerry and rick's relationship. i liked seeing rick disapprove of them making fun of jerry, had some funny moments and i even liked jerry here.

49. a rick in king mortur's mort: not the best but i enjoyed rickbot being nice to morty. also this episode sets up for rmrm which i love.

48. promortyus: morty's little yee-haw 😭. and their conversation, so sweet. taking the adderall line as an adhd rick confirmation. "It is my thing. Just like yours is dying alone," get his ass. i feel like the romance couldve been a compelling story if the hosts werent rnm.

47. the whirly dirly conspiracy: rick's take on jerry was accurate. "But no, like father like goddamn daughter! You wanna be like Rick? Congratulations, you're just as arrogant and just as irresponsible!" morty ate. i prefered summer and beths storyline to rick and jerry's.

c tier: solid, episodes, some have a few faults but theyre small

46. mort: ragnarick: it's so high up because i found rick to be likeable and liked his dynamic with morty. ricks clone was cute too.

45. look who's purging now: "Screw you, Rick! I'll purge you too, you old rickety piece of crap!" rnm's storyline was great, i liked arthrisha.

44. the ricks must be crazy: "I dropped out of school. It's not a place for smart people." "Ohhhh, snap!" lmao literally my reaction. "Ooh. Wow. Gaaay!" "That is pretty gay." not much more to say, good ep.

43. never ricking morty: rnm were sweet in this ep. the gay ass song with rick and bp. "Rick are you– do you need to go to the hospital?" the forehead kiss was sweet. (we're ignoring "Lips if you want.")

42. mort dinner rick andre: mr nimbus is a great character. the wine storyline was a bit boring. "I havent been to a full week of school in years! I don't know shit!" love the peek at rick's backstory too.

41. rick potion #9: important lore episode. some funny bits. morty was a little creepy in this one. i love jerry primes character development. first look on down from the bridge moment !!

40. forgetting sarick mortshall: "What are you, eight? Is this macaroni art? You expect me to believe you built this because you don't care?" liked ricks storyline and he actually does seem to be showing minor development. the end song was good. liked garbage goober's lore.

39. morty's mindblowers: rick removing whatever memories he wanted was fucked up. rick saying granite instead of granted will always be funny. also him losing in chackers and skiing into a tree.

38. mortyplicity: entertaining enough if a little convoluted, i liked it though. sweet moment between the decoy family, shame they died.

b tier: good to great episodes.

37. big trouble in little sanchez: actually liked jerry and beths storyline in this one. tiny riiick !! "old rick! ruining everything!" good episode.

36. pilot: good intro, sets the tone. rick is such a dick (affectionate). rnm's dynamic !! the animation is great. overall great episode.

35. pickle rick: ik its a overrated but i think its good. hes pickle riiiick. dr wong's speech to rick was actually really good and accurate.

34. meeseeks and destroy: rick was such a whiny bitch this episode (affectionate), up until the mr jellybean stuff, which i liked bcs it was handled well by the writers and rick was actually very sweet.

33. rick and morty's thanksploitation spectacular: president curtis' alcoholic sci-fi boyfriend is probably my favourite way rick has been refered to in the show LOL. overall i enjoyed this episode.

32. something ricked this way comes: idc now but, the first time watching rick's r slur speech it was obnoxious and offputting. summer and rick were great, i adore their dynamic, love summer and rick episodes, but idrc for jerry's storyline, he bores me so bad.

31. full meta jackrick: "Rick can't change, Morty. Change is what you might call his Kryptonite." there were a lot of things i liked abt this ep.

30. vindicators 3: the return of worldender: very good episode. forever a believer that the ride was for morty and rick just chickened out.

29. a rickle in time: the va for the testicle monster was great. beth and jerry's storyline also wasn't bad. rick jumping into the hole and sacrificing his life for morty, im sobbing. great episode.

28. the vat of acid episode: morty trying to make rick feel better about not being able to make the thing was very sweet. morty's relationship with that girl was adorable, so sad it was erased by jerry's dumb ass /lh. fuck rick in this episode. the end was funny.

27. rixty minutes: while i do love interdimensional cable this episode would've been lower if it wasn't for all the character moments. "You can't leave, you're 17." "Yeah, and I'm not pregnant. I'm gonna have better judgement than you guys had at my age." loved summer getting screentime. beth and jerry's moment was quite sweet.

26. ricksy business: bp and squanchy !!! >:) bp coming through with the deep speech. the montage of rick morty and summer at the end is so adorable i love them sm <3. "I love my grandkids." "Aw :)." "Psych, just kidding, my new catchphrase is i dont give a fuuuck!"

25. get schwifty: first president curtis episode !! i love him. love morty and bp interactions haha. "In bird culture, this is considered a dick move." "It is random debris. I found it in my carpet. I don't know what humans eat." crying i love him sm. one of my personal favs lol :).

24. juricksick mort: tbh i mostly like this ep bcs of "You pompous autistic cadaver!" but there was other good moments and it was entertaining. rick was funny and likeable and very much a disaster of a human being, as i was promised when i started watching rnm.

23. star mort rickturn of the jerri: space beth !! "You cosplay as your shitty father in his 30's." "Its funny. I always wondered who would win if we ever fought." "Then you were always a bad friend." :(. "Holy shit, I'm a terrible father." i forgot how good this episode was, very angsty.

22. total rickall: genuinely love this episode. KEITH DAVID >:D. rick's "weird made-up sounding catchphrases" compilation is one of my fav moments in the show lol, everyone looks so concerned 💀.

21. rest and ricklaxation: "Grandpa's here." SOBBING. "Because you kept drunk-dialing me and crying about it!" "I wasn't crying!" loved jessica and ricks dynamic lol. great episode.

20. rickfending your mort: great follow up to unmortricken, i like that rick doesnt just go back to normal and we see it takes a while and even then its only bcs morty steps in. morty making up titles for all their adventures is adorable. great sweet scenes between rnm.

19. the rickchurian mortydate: autistic rick !! also minecraft. the president is such a pathetic loser lol <3. i loved rick and morty being on the same wavelength in this episode. the ending was good.

18. wet kuat amortycan summer: summer-centric episode !! rick was likeable, liked seeing him clumsy getting his grove back. him saying summer reminds him of diane again, he's getting so much more open, im so proud, can you imagine s3 rick being sincere like that?

17. close rickcounters of the rick kind: best s1 episode, love citadel episodes. evil morty !!!!! some funny moments. "You're crying? Over a Morty?" sobbing. "Yeah, but wheres the transmitter?" and the evil morty song oh god, best scene ever fr. i love my evil guy :3.

s tier: outstanding episodes, the 16 best imo.

16. that's amorte: FANTASTIC episode, the end montage is the only part of any rnm episode thats made me cry a little, it would be higher up but i have some personal favs which i put higher. i feel like this episode was very classic rnm after having them separated half of s7.

15. the old man and the seat: jerry and morty's dynamic is pretty funny. tony and rick's storyline was fantastic. some pretty angsty stuff. "The saaaddest piece of garbage in the entire cosmos."

14. the abc's of beth: rick and beth episode !! rick saying that an adventure clearly needs morty in it, aw. i did not care about jerry's storyline at all. beth had no right being so relatable in this ep.

13. ricktional mortpoon's rickmas mortcation: rick relapsing into finding prime !! "I'm not touching that thing. I'll get neurotypical cooties." ok, so ik a lot of ppl don't like the speech rick said to morty, but i do, he was going through a LOT, this clearly took him quite a few steps back in development and healing, i think it was less bad than a lot of other things he's done and way more justified.

12. fear no mort: loved morty getting his time to shine, LOVED diane and rick. morty realising rick wasn't in the hole has to be one of the best moments in the show. rick not going in the hole at the end bcs morty told him not to, hope some day he'll get to the point of doing things for morty in front of him so he can realise how much he cares.

11. analyze piss: look at rick asking dr wong for advice. him relating to piss master :(. also i read a phenomenal fic abt this ep (tw sh) (link).

10. air force wong: UNITY RETURNS! Rick was kinda childish in this episode but i feel like it was justified, he wasn't being a dick just bcs, he was hurting, and he even kinda apologised to summer, hes trying. rick going to drink with the president instead of being alone.

9. the rickshank rickdemption: RICK PRIME. "That, diane, is the last great idea that will ever be had in this garage." :((((. ricks backstory. "he's not a villan, summer, but he shouldn't be ur hero." fantastic ep.

8. rickmurai jack: love two crows rick. rick's full "crybaby" backstory !! "Now you're evil morty, too. sooner or later we all are. on this side of the curve." THE END OH GOD. THE MUSIC. EVIL MORTY LETTING OUT A SIGH OF RELIEF. INSANE finale.

7. gotron jerrysis rickvangelion: rick is so spectacularly autistic in this one. i like how he doesnt silly hyperfixtate, he full on unhealthy hyperfixtates. i practically know this ep off by heart. comfort ep fr.

6. rickternal friendshine of the spotless mort: im not sorry for putting this up so high, i love this ep so fucking much. memory rick is so silly i love him sm. "You were a good friend, Rick. Goodbye." the blood ridge confession makes me FERAL. i can quote it word for word.

5. the wedding squanchers: THIS EPISODE. rick watching bp die in front of him. rick turning himself in :(. "everyone i know goes away in the end." the music was so good. "he's not coming back, is he?"

4. the ricklantis mixup: best citadel ep, fight me. j-22 trying to save simple rick only to suffer the same fate :(. slick jumping into the wishing portal. the ending was phenomenal, every single storyline was amazing and important. and evil morty returns.

3. auto erotic assimilation: love unity and ricks dynamic. blim blam humbling beth and jerry. jerry using the weed whacker right in front of the garage where rick just attempted. and no one notices. bc that's how it is. "do you feel it?" is a great song. maybe this ep is higher than it should be but it's my comfort ep, it means so much to me.

2. solaricks: first time we get to see dimension c-137 out of a flashback !! "I hope Summer knows what happens to the people you love!" "Oh, am I cool enough for you now? Well, that was easy. It only cost me fucking everything." "I don't know him. You're my grandpa, rick." rip jerry prime, my fav jerry. THIS EPISODE IS PHENOMENAL.

1. unmortricken: ok anyone who knows me knows this is my fav ep bcs i never stfu abt it. i mean, evil morty backstory, rick beating prime to death, GOD. ian cardoni was COOKING with the delivery of those lines, and the lines were fantastic. some good rnm moments. the angst is so good. "How's it feel? Better? No? Exactly the same? Yeah, it always does." best look on down from the bridge moment.

i keep going over this a million times just to make sure everything is perfect but idk, some episodes are maybe interchangeable, im just going to post it bcs its been rotting in my drafts for quite a while now, everyone promise you dont hate me for putting an episode 1 slot too high or low /j

and sorry for all the jerry hate in this post, i dont hate him i just find him boring, so eps where he's the centre tend to be lower on the list.

[beware-of-eels]

Rajbow AU where Bowie and Emma go ice skating during free skate hours at the rink Raj and Wayne work part time to help cover hockey costs

except instead of being bad at it, Bowie fully knowing how to skate- instead faking a minor (graceful) fall so that the cute rink employee with the eyebrows comes over to help him up and check on him. And maybe get his number

Got carried away thinking about this in detail so if you want the longer babbly almost-a-fic version it's under the cut lmao

[disclaimer: everything ik abt ice rinks is from going to the one at the mall like. maybe three times in my life bdbsbnxnd. I live in Texas] [i've also literally never written fanfic and so am not much of a writer but this kind of possessed me when i was bored at work so if the dialogue is bad or ooc and the tense is all off.... no its not lmao]

Anyways - Emma's decided she's going to invest in hobbies that she DIDN'T share with chase, something completely separate and away from him -- chase thinks its to impress him bc of course he does. someone send this boy to detention--and drags Bowie along "so she's not alone, obviously"

good friend that he is, Bowie goes with, and especially bc Bowie DOES know how to skate - pretty well actually. he's no figure skater/hockey player/etc, but if Bowies going to do anything in public he's going to do it well. he can make his way around the rink with ease, manage a little fancy footwork when he wants to, enough to pull a minor trick out of his hat. besides, what's the point of doing something if you can't show off a little bit? never hurts to catch someone's eye, or establish yourself to your peers as someone who knows what they're doing -- and really, Bowie's counting on his reputation to ensure those prom votes.

what Bowie didn't count on was the cute hockey boy that was handing off skate rentals to blush and stammer so sweetly when he flirted with him for the hell of it. and he really didn't count on said cute hockey boy having a shift change and heading onto the rink to fill in as ice monitor pretty soon after he and Emma start skating. Even in the flourescent lighting the boy is cute, and it doesn't take a genius to see how hockey has bulked him up - and he really was so endearing when he was flustered- so Bowie figures why not try his hand at a little more fun. And really, what better way to shoot his shot than to fake needing a little extra help from a buff hockey player?

Naturally Wayne and Raj work their stations together - their manager had tried to separate them once and was QUICK to never make that mistake again - so when they've switched out with their coworkers handling skate rentals, they're immediately out on the ice together, as loud and rambunctious as they can get away with without reprimand

if Raj is a little (not-so) secretly excited to maybe see the cute boy that winked at him earlier - Yknow, bc it made him feel excited! ...whatever that meant - then that's between him, Wayne, and the hockey gods. otherwise hes just pumped to be on the ice with his best bud. They're making their rounds, keeping an eye out for anything dangerous or against the rules that they might have to intervene, and otherwise yelling hockey metaphors and mutual encouragement as loudly as they can get away with

and right when Wayne has to slip away to separate a couple of kids trying to trip eachother, Bowie decides to makes his move

He gives emma the heads up that he's gonna slow down and try something, and does his best to fall as gracefully as he can - maintaining the look of competence is still important after all - while still doing so loud enough to garner the cute hockey boy's - Rajie?- attention. He sits on the ice a second longer than he strictly necessary, and by the time he's ready to stand back up Raj is there holding out a steady hand, bushy eyebrows pulled together in concern.

"oh my god are you okay - here I'll help you up" He looks so worried for a moment that Bowie almost feels bad for lying. Almost.

"well i'm much better now" Bowie throws the boy another wink, earning him the exact flustered face Raj had responded with before. Forget subtlety if that's the reaction he was going to get by being forward, "but I do think my ankle could use a little TLC - care to help me get somewhere to sit down?

"Uh yes! Yes of course, thats. thats what I'm here for!" Raj can feel his face heating up as he stammers under the gaze of the boy in front of him "I'm Raj, uh by the way"

And isn't he just too cute "I'm Bowie, it's nice to meet you"

Raj quickly signals to Wayne the general situation, and then solidifies himself into position to help Bowie up without falling himself. after that it doesn't take too much finagling to get bowie back up to his feet and leaning heavily on raj's shoulder and the two of them start to slowly make their way back off of the rink. Bowie can't help but smile a bit- he was absolutely right about Raj being buff, and he couldn't wait to see what else he had in store.

Raj, nervous about having a cute boy so close to him suddenly, does what he does best - fall into Hockey talk - or in this case, hockey adjacent. Hockey could be a dangerous sport - he'd helped teammates with ankle sprains plenty of times! It would probably help Bowie feel better to know that Raj has this handled "We'll have to check which part of your ankle hurts once we sit you down - just to make sure it's not a fracture. You can lean on me more if you need! its uh, you don't want to put too much pressure on it until we can take a look at it. I should have some extra stuff in my bag to wrap it up if its a sprain, and then I can see if we still have ice packs in the first aid kit! Hopefully it's just a sprain, but dont worry if it's worse I'll still make sure you're okay! When me and wayne - that's my buddy - were kids, I fractured my arm pretty bad at practic-"

Bowie had seen already that Raj was a little nervous talking to him, if plenty enthusiastic. But the sweetness of his scramble to comfort Bowie for an injury that hadn't even occured - not that he had to know that - was invigorating none the less. There was a genuineness to the boy that was refreshing, and he was sure if he was actually hurt, he would be feeling calmed and comforted by his babbling. If not for the talk about first aid, then for the earnestness in Raj's telling of his own past injuries on the ice.

Raj doesn't realize he's still talking until he's helping Bowie sit down on a bench outside near the skate rental area. "oh sorry if that was too much - I'm gonna go get the first aid kit then I'll be right back!"

He walked off quickly, glad for the chance to take a breather, and keep his head from being clouded by sharp eyes and quit witted flirting. Not to mention the bold choice of Bowie to wear a crop top to go ice skating. It certainly did look nice on him

Once Raj returns, he leans down and carefully begins checking Bowies ankle for anything serious - slowly pressing on the skin and rotating the foot to gauge maneuverability. Satisfied with Bowie's assessment that the pain wasn't too bad, he got to work wrapping his foot - Raj wasn't going to let shoddy first aid exacerbate the problem.

Looking down at the hockey player in front of him, Bowie gets to work on his own interests. "Thank you for all your help - usually I consider myself a pretty good skater, but oh well. I guess one person can't be fantastic at everything all the time," he punctuated with a large sigh, wiggling his toes when Raj motions for him to.

"Oh I'm sure you're always fantastic! I've been skating since I could walk and even I still take a tumble from time to time - that doesn't mean you aren't great! I guess mine usually come from bad checks though eh? Oh because I play hockey! I don't remember if I told you that-- A-anyways, I didn't really get to see you skate before you fell but I'm sure you're incredible. I mean you seem incredible. At skating! I mean"

Raj finally cuts himself off, hoping to end the awkardness of his own rambling. All he had to do was finish wrapping up Bowie's ankle and exit the interaction with minimal blushing - he could do that! He could hear Wayne's voice hyping him up in his head - was a snow owl, he'd faced goons bent on injuring and cross checks more than even made sense for a highschool league - he could handle getting through a conversation with a cute boy. Even if said cute boy had long eyelashes and a knowing smile and a pearl necklace expertly framing his neck.

Bowie of course could not be more pleased - it seems Raj was more than just fun to fluster. He was sweet and earnest and clearly passionate about hockey - enough that Bowie found himself actually looking forward to hearing more of Raj's confusing hockey lingo, if it meant seeing that focused look in his eyes when he started getting carried away.

"Well if you really think so, maybe you'd like to see how incredible I am some other time - when you're not working, of course"

"For sure dude! That sounds like loads of fun!" Raj's agreement comes out enthusiastic, until he look down at Bowies ankle in his hands, freshly wrapped and now with an ice pack to match "But not until your ankle's healed up - skating's great but you won't be able to if you hurt your ankle worse by pushing it." The sudden intensity of his expression betraying how seriously the boy takes his sport.

Bowie stifles a laugh "It really doesn't hurt that much, but deal. Maybe you can show me some of your fancy hockey moves while we're at it" he said liltingly. and theres that blush again, hard to see on his skin but clear as day to the boy who triggered it "in the meantime though -can I get your number?"

Raj answers without even taking a beat "Oh I'm number 8! On the snow owls, I'm actually alternate capt-" he's cut off by a gentle hand on his own where it's still holding the ice pack.

"I actually meant your phone number" bowie's ecpression is nothing but kind, so Raj doesn't feel quite so clueless when he manages out a

"Right! yes, right - here let me see your phone"

the two boys quickly exchange numbers, as Bowie continues his previous thought "But I'd love to hear all about your hockey team on our date"

"Yeah! ha, that sounds good."

The two of them stay a moment just to smile at one another, before the moment is broken-

"RAJIE! Are you doin okay there bud? Do you need some help?" "Don't worry Wayners! I'll be over in a sec!"

Raj turns back to Bowie, sheepish "I uh, gotta get back to work, do you have somebody that can take you home safe?"

Bowie presses a quick peck to his cheek, "I've got a friend here with me, no need to worry about little ole me. I'll see you soon though, handsome"

And again that blush. Raj manages to stammer through a goodbye before trudging back to the ice - doing a quick lap around at full speed to release some of his energy before returning to his best friends side. He'd tell Wayne all about it later, for now he was just doing his best not to smile too hard.

Eventually Emma finds her way to Bowie sat on a bench, carefully tying his shoes back over a newly bandaged ankle.

"sooo how'd it go? you didn't really hurt your ankle did you? because you know I'd feel awful for bringing you here if you got hurt and didn't even get a cute boy's number out of it"

"No on the injury, Yes on getting his number - let's head back to your house, I'll catch you up on the ride home"

"Yes! well I'm glad one of us had a good time - after you left Chase walked by - how did he even know we were here? He's so -"

Bowie tunes out the rest of his friends rant, he'd heard this before, and he was sure she'd forgive him for not listening if he told her he was thinking about his upcoming date with Raj. The boy really was too good, and Bowie hadn't even really had to work very hard to find that out. He found himself throwing in an occasional remark to keep Emma going as they walked, thinking about the intensity with which Raj clearly loved sports, about the simple sincerity in the way that he talked. This really could be the start of something special

Yep, the trip to the ice rink had gone better than imagined. He just needed to admit to Raj that he had fallen on purpose and all would be well.

After they were on their date, of course.

[ubike-official]

hello everynyan, date update for those who care abt my silly little dating life lol:

Sooo uhh it was interesting, the day leading up to this my friend was having a bad time at home and asked to stay the night. i was like ofc sure, he's met her before and they were cool and also she will probably be gone before he gets there anyways. i was scared abt my dog bc he doesn't like new people and sometimes growls at ppl if they pet him weird or approach him wrong. i try to warn everyone of this but i don't know how best to explain what to do and not do. and my dog is half pitbull half lab so he's big and a bit intimidating for ppl that don't have bigger dogs.

also he growled at my friend the night before. so i was like. im going to give him sooo much dog cbd, patchy plsss dont ruin this for me. He was fine but i was anxious when i woke up at like 7am to walk him. i get a text at 7:30 from tresspassing dude that he's on his way. and I'm like WYM ON YOUR WAY... THATS SO EARLY. i then wake up my friend to let her know whats going on. she was there with us for like 2.5 before leaving and i was scared it'd be awkward but tbh it was good. she helps cut the initial anxiety bc she's a yapper (lovingly) and i can yap with ppl i know well but I'm more of a listener. trespassing dude (his names andrew) is also more of a listener. so we both are just quiet a lot. so she helped getting both of us talking bc sometimes that is an issue.

We started baking, doing prep stuff. we leave the bread to rise, go on a little walk around my neighborhood to see this house with a chicken coop. We then see some squirrels and im like "oh two of em, cute" and andrew was like, "oh no theres three, one behind that car." and he points but I can't see over it. im 5'0/153cm hes 5'9/175 then is like "wait.. no you can't see that" and I'm like, "ah yea thats ok! i believe you theres one there" and then he offer to pick me up so i can see it. and I'm mentally like.... OH and i agree ofc and at that point my friend is like.. wow this corner is so interesting, imma look over here. and he picks me up. tbh i was not looking at the squirrel i was just thinking "wow, this is not a thing this guy would offer platonically" like idk how to describe him but he's quiet and withdrawn and not the type to just be like "i will pick u up" to friends. i have friends and know ppl like that, this guy is Not One Of them. So that ends and I'm like, cool thanks! and then my friend is like, okay its about time to take my leave and parts ways.

Then we finish baking and grill some meat for sandwiches. This entire time we're in the kitchen he is washing like every single dish. i did not have to ask once, he just kinda did it. And i was impressed. bare minimum ik, but i was daydreaming beforehand like "aww this will be so cute. I'll be washing dishes and then handing them to him to dry c: so domestic" but nope, he beat me to it, roles reversed. which was such a nice surprise as he like rarely takes the initiative for stuff. its gotten better but idk the way he was when we first met is still etched in my brain.

So we do that, finish up and chill for a bit. i showed him my sketchbooks and there was this one hand study i showed him and he's like. "oh my pinkys are fucked up" and they are. they're like bend in, i noticed this before but didn't say anything bc it felt odd to comment on. and then before long hes like it feels odd so I'm like.. can i feel it? and yea. then i had him feel what mine are like and ... gay ppl and their hands. there was a lot of little like casual touching and brush of hands. like normally if i like handed him something or like sat by him we would like not touch, it was so sterile. it drove all my friends insaneeeee. but finally it was different this time which was so nice.

Afterwards we go bouldering at this park by my house and I've been there before but I'm a bit out of shape since the last time i went. It happens, but I didn't realize it til we start climbing and I'm like. oh fuck this may have been a mistake. We also took a harder route to the top by accident. There was this one little mini cave he found and i couldn't make it up bc i just didnt have the flexibility to get my leg on the foot hold to get up. nor do i have the upper body strength to pull myself up as my arms are weak as hell. And he called like "where are you!?" and i was like "oh you go on and explore and then meet me back down here, i can't get up, my legs won't reach the foot hold" and he got down and was like "nah I'll pull you up" and i was like... No You Will Not. bc i have issues and I haaaaate asking for help. Also he's like strong I'm sure. i know he does work out a lot but he has a pretty small frame and i was like... worried. Last thing i wanted was for both of us to get hurt bc of me. Like I'd kms.

But he insisted so i took his help and it was cool. I'm very glad he did that. there was another instance where i was going down a rock and slipped and he went down first and like, i would not have gotten hurt. it was just mentally scary but if i landed hard it still would have been fine. but as i sloped i yelled like "SHIT" and next thing i know he's on top of me bear hug so i dont fall which was soooooo embarrassing omg but also very nice. i apologized profusely bc... as i mentioned. i got problems with taking help. hyper independence is real. There were a few more instances where he offered to help me and i declined and i hope it did not come across harshly, it honestly might have. and he was just being kind however i just HATE accepting help. I know... its bad. i will continue to work on it.

We look around, saw some really cool stuff. Had a few more little close moments which i will skip for brevity bc this is already Sooo long.

i debriefed with the friend who was at my house and say the first 2 hrs and she was like.... oh yea he definitely likes you. And as soon as he got home he told everyone on our discord that we made bread together. To me it looked like the nerd equivalent of a ig soft launch story. So... yea :D

Finally we get back home and its like 5pm. i fully expected him to like stay for 10 min, get some water and be like, lol its late i gotta dip. Which i would Not have been mad abt. he was at my place since 8am. this was the longest we've hung out before. But nope he lingered for an hour more. like we really did not have any reason to stay. We were just talking abt nothing rlly on my couch and like slowly getting closer, like i remember it now and it was the Perfect chance to be like "hey i like you" or do Something. but there was already soooo much progress and i was like, sage lets not get greedy. final win though was he asked me to go to a concert with him of a band we both like and its so funny.

bc i saw they announced their tour like 2 weeks ago and thought, aww it'd be nice if we went to together but i really didn't want to have to ask. I'm always scared of being too much and being a "clingy desperate woman" to a guy who doesn't like her. this has happened before. its been years, i should be over it but I'm not. that wound isnt healed but I'm working on it. And thankfully he brought it up and asked me to go. And that concerts like next year so like... thats a really nice sign. and yea. it was just rlly good. I'm happy. still kicking myself for not doing a little more but it was A Lot of Progress for me regardless and I do think our chemistry will only continue to deepen so I'm optimistic.

[grntaire]

oversharing on the internet again lol

i kinda think i should break up w my partner and im super sad and confused abt it bc like. i love him very much and he is an incredibly kind person and is rly funny and attractive and all of these things and yet. i still feel like something is missing. like i never felt a magnetism to him or butterflies or anything like that? i would get excited when he'd text me and i would look forward to seeing him but i think i just need someone who matches my energy more? i'm definitely more outgoing than he is which is ironic bc i'm really not extroverted in the traditional sense. like i can talk to ppl plenty once i'm comfortable but it takes me a bit to get there. and truthfully being the more outgoing one in a relationship is not really a pressure i can handle. i'm also like, the only one who ever suggests we go out and do stuff. i genuinely can't remember the last time or if he's ever suggested we go out on a date, ever, and ik he doesn't mostly because of money which i get, and also bc he's very much the type of person who any quality time is good quality time and doesn't need to go out on dates to know that but it's really important to me and i've told him that and he's never done anything abt it. also when we do go out i usually end up paying for the both of us bc he's a full time student rn and i was working full time for a while and could kind of afford it but also like, no i couldn't lol. that's not to say he doesn't do anything for me ever, quite the opposite, really. like i don't drive bc Trauma so he has to drive an hour just to see me and he does it gladly, he's also given me so many rides to work before too. not to say we've been too transactional bc for the most part we've been okay about it but at the end of the day i think i just feel love on like, a bigger scale than he does, or i want a love that feels bigger than this. i am definitely more of a romantic than i let myself admit and idk i am so scared that i would be settling if i stayed with him.

but also generally i'm in an odd place w my life. i'm living at home again and i'm putting off my student teaching again so i can save up money and get my breast reduction and all that and i went through a whole career crisis bc graduating college in 2020 and starting grad school immediately that fall fucking sucked and i had wicked bad burn out that i'm still recovering from and i really struggled with whether or not with my love for music and if i still wanted to teach it. im finally in a place where i know its what i love and it's what i want to do, though, which is nice. i also need to restart therapy (doing so at the end of the month) and work thru my trauma so i can get my license bc oh man is it catching up to me and dealing w the guilt of ppl having to drive me places is slowly driving me nuts. so part of me is like idk maybe its not him maybe its everything else. or maybe its all of it. but it just feel like my life right now is so crowded and i just cant handle it all and my gut is saying i need space from him. but i'll miss him so much, too. fuck this fucking sucks lmao

[todayisawthewhxlewxrld]

So!! I'm going insane!! Basically I have this boyfriend, and oml I love him so MUUUCCHHHh. But it's and stop because this has me so dead.

We met thru mutual friends ON A SERVER IN DISCORD man frick it sounds so bad when it's said but wtv, I'm not one to date online. Like I did it 2 other times and one was when I was 12 and in the pandemic 😔 THATS NOT WHERE THE PROBLEM LIES. I love him regardless and we call frequently, play games a lot together and ofc we text ALL THE TIIME. THE PROBLEM IS I KEEP DREAMING OF HIIIMMM.

I went to bed this morning and had a dream that he and I were living together, like in my grandmas house (she's been saying that she wants to pass it down to me and my family) and we were just super touchy and lovey dovey with each other. The long intimate hugs where we swayed a little bit felt so real, TOO real. Now ofc my mind had to get a lil freaky near the end but even then it wasn't anything extreme, it was just omfg. The atmosphere was filled with love rather than lust, we held hands, cuddled, ate together.... Yall I just want him so bad, lord if you hear me bless me with a hug from this beautiful amazing flawless perfect sweetest funniest man, I CANT.

ITS SO BAD!!! I literally have his initial EVERYWHERE. My dresser drawer has his name, interests and favorite things on there 😖 I bought a thing of stickers for this single full metal alchemist sticker just so I could put it there, he's all I think about AND WHEN I PLAY SOMETHING WITH MY FRIENDS ALL I CAN THINK ABOUT IS IF HE WOULD WANT TO PLAY IT WITH ME ASWELL!!! Istg I have never been this like idk way with another person, I genuinely feel like I'm dying everyday because WHHHHYYYY IS THE LOML SO FAR AWAY FROM MEEEEEEE.

It's an OBSESSION at this point, and I NEED TO GET OVER IT BUT LORDDDDDDD...... THE HEAVENS BLESSED ME WITH SOMETHING AMAZING 😭😭

Anyways lemme stop, I just can't say THIS TO ANYONE ELSE BECAUSE IK ALL MY FRIENDS ARE TIRED OF HEARING ABT HIM BUT HES ALL THAT OCCUPIES MY MIND. DAMN IT I MELT EVERYTIME HE SAYS MY NICKNAMMEEEE. 😪😪

OKOO FR LEMME STOP BEFKRE I POP A BLOOD VESSEL or start writing notes abt him 🤭 I'm gonna eat play fortnite and SLEEP hopefully, if he doesn't text me soon 🙄 (he has school in a few hours and is currently sleeping, so it's likely that I won't be texted until 8 am, WHICH IDM.... I'll stay up if I HAVE to, OR I'll just sleep and set an alarm) (I fell asleep around 9 am tdy and missed his text after he was home cause I was sleeping, I woke up disappointed in myself)

Holy shit maybe I'm a lovergirl 😧 got me saying and admitting things I PROMISED ID NEVER DO!

Okay I gotta go before I flip out BYEEYE

THIS IS SOOOOO CUTE STOPPP ugh i need all of u to stop having love lives :///

ur literally just like making fanfic of him in ur own dreams i’m crurogngn

LOVE THIS FOR U THO BAE THIS IS ADORABLE

[takasgf]

thought just came into my mind after sending that last ask. ik I mentioned swap Morket but that was just swapping their circumstances. I kinda also wanna hear more abt a species swap 💭 where r.ocket is the silly porcelain-like alien and morgan is the... well.!!!! She doesn't have to be a raccoon cause I vaguely remember you drawing her as a deer but yk what I mean. Idk !!! I'm just curious about what you've got going on in ur noggin :3c

HI WISHI!!!! im answering this one first because I've got more ideas for it ;^; I've been thinking about your questions for weeks and I've been trying to get some actual lore bit by bit.

I present to you!!! Morgen Deer :3 (reindeer actually but i like how just deer sounds) in all honesty i've got more ideas for her than humanoid!Rocky, but I'll be sure to do a follow up post for him when I get some ideas. Until then, let's talk about her!! Her story makes more sense in a universe in which they are both animal-like people.

If the outfit isnt too obvious already, she used to be a professional wrestler in this universe! A genetically modified reindeer with amplified strength - she isnt from the same lab as R.ocket's, so I suppose there were multiple space scientists experimenting on animals at the time😭 okay, hers were a bit more caring towards her but they still specifically made her for the entertainment industry. She is pretty feared by others, but not treated with enough respect due to her species. She first meets Rocky when he randomly attends one of her matches, out of curiosity - she was honestly pretty excited to see "someone like her" in the crowd of spectators, so she definitely tried to meet up with him after. Can't say they immediately formed a connection because Morgen was very socially awkward and Rocky's not exactly the most friendliest person either, but they had respect for one another and knew they could count on eachother if there was any need for that.

After some time, Morgen started to get really sick of being a wrestler and not being treated properly and she wanted to find an opportunity to run away!! There was one incident in which she stopped a fight between Rocky and some other person, getting her antler ripped apart in the process. That was her call to start a new life and she ran away with her raccoon friend, who promised he'll fix her antler as thanks for standing up for him. He wasn't very keen on the idea on having a companion (this was before he meet G.root) but he warmed up to her and they stuck together, as they met all of their other friends !! Once again, it took them until after IW to admit their feelings for eachother because they are dumb and scared. It's not like everyone already thought they were together because "hmm if this guy is a furry and this girl is also a furry then they must be a couple!!1!"

ok thats all i have because im burnt out on ideas. humanoid/zteamer person r.ocket is just an emo catboy(raccoon boy?) to be honest. and i think he's super silly and a cutie pie and he still bites people's arms and steps on their feet because he's a short king full of anger

here's an albino raccoon Morgen just for fun though :3 for a silly AU in which they are both raccoons (who kiss) (eachother)

[bookwyrminspiration]

hi dira im abt to propaganda SO hard. okay so aftg!!! full series name is all for the game and its a teilogy the first book is named the foxhole court. its such a silly silly series you go into it expecting ??? and you come out of it Forever Changed this is not just me being dramatic ask ANY fan and they will agree. its the kinda series you finish and you feel like youre fucking high like you imagined everything like it was all a fucking pipe dream (thats a reference. which you would get. if you read the books. that sounds mildly threatening im sorry but anyways yes read the books!!) no but seriously it may not be the BEST literature ever published but the characters latch onto you the brainworms never cease!! somewhat similar to kotlc!! sure every character is a bit of an asshole but you love them anyways esp as the books go on and you learn a little bit more abt them and get a little bit more attached <3 some of the plot twists hit like a TRUCK you read it and you think no way would this actually happen which!! yeah!! it would not actually happen!! its so crazy and fun and if you like the first book then youll never escape the trap. also yes ik i havent said anything abt like the actual BOOK yet but in my defense a lot of this is just pure FEELING and if nothing else my enthusiasm better convince SOMEONE to read aftg. but anyways the actual book ohhh idk how to describe it its like mafia/sports/found family??? i dont know i think i described it somewhat better in my pinned post (more propaganda. everyone go read my pinned post and then read aftg) okay i think im done now!!!!

hi averyy I am not immune to propaganda, I've actually casually looked for the series before just because you've put it on my dash enough I was like right wots all this then? In order to read it I'll have to check out the ebook from my library (not my preferred way to read but its okay), but it's on my list don't you worry. I have other things to read through first but it is, in fact, on my tbr. Because of you.

You're right this really has told me like nothing about what the book is actually about, just that you really love it and lose your mind over it, but that's okay because that's enough <3. I think it's about a fake sport, and one of the main characters smokes a lot (but in a hot way that makes him sexier...?), but that's about as much as I could tell you. Oh they're the foxes. Are there lesbians? I feel like there's been mention of a mean lesbian, or maybe just a sapphic in general but I'm not at all confident in that.

Anyway, thanks for the propaganda I'll read it :) eventually

[starglitterz]

Quill!!! if it's not too intrusive, pls give us your top 10 y/n moments lol!!!!

HAHAHSKDJKJSD omfg who sent this in 😭😭😭 this is so funny tho i'll def do it (shameless plug btw, i have a whole series based on my irl experiences w romance called to all the boys i've loved before [totally original, ik] u should check it out!!)

these aren't in any particular order btw it's just the ones i rmb HAHA also i think these are pretty recent i tried not to include any of the ones i alrdy have in the series 👍

10. when i went for an anime con and i had just arrived, and after taking a pic w this one cosplayer his friend (in a kirito cosplay) came up to me and asked if he could princess carry me for a pic HSKJDK

9. when i visited my highschool for a festival thing and found out that one of my juniors had a crush on me (and still did??) and had told all his friends abt how cute and pretty he thinks i am HAHAHA (a total ego boost tbh someone should have told him that i am actually not all that)

8. being in a love triangle except it wasn't really a triangle it was like my two guy best friends had crushes on me at the same time and had a falling out over me (not to be amy dunne from gone girl but i did always want 2 guys to fight over me GOODBYE)

7. this one guy that was texting me and asking me on a date kept flirting w me and it was so stupidly lame that it was cute

6. going for my college orientation party and having a few guys ask me for my insta (honestly i had never expected this would happen I WAS SO KJASKJDKSJD ABT IT)

5. at the same orientation party some random older guy tried to hit on me so i ran away and this other guy i had met earlier was rlly nice and waited w me until my transport arrived and texted later to ask if i had gotten home safely 🥺 (the bar for men is like 700 feet under the ground)

4. at the anime con (same as earlier) i got kabedoned by this girl cosplaying gojo and she said i looked rlly cute and i nearly collapsed

3. HAHA I CANT BELIEVE I ALMOST FORGOT THIS BUT on my birthday i went on the bus to get home and the guy behind me was in my course, and he recognised me so we were talking for a bit until he realised it was my bday, and he literally asked the guy next to him to please switch places so we could sit tgt and he could wish me properly 😭it was so cute he had like golden retriever vibes HAHA and we were talking the entire time it was vv fun

2. yk that thing where u compare hand sizes but then they hold your hand HAHAHA that actually happened to me w one of my new friends 💀 he has rlly nice hands tho so no complaints here PLSKJWDKJS

1, ok guys now this one is some real life kdrama bs istg i felt like it was a movie while it was happening 😭 so basically the bus was pretty much full and i ended up sitting next to this rlly cute guy. and my brain was going 'damn i wanna talk to him', but i had to put my purse away first. so i was trying to put it in my bag, but it slipped and fell onto the floor and he was like 'oh!', and then i had to bend down and pick it up while thinking 'NOO this is so embarrassing he probably thinks im a dumbass'. and then i managaed to embarrass myself further 👍 guess what? while trying to sit back up again i literally hit my head against the chair in front of me and went 'ow!' out loud and the guy was like 'oh no are you okay 😭⁉' and i was like 'yeah... just super embarrassed HAHA' and we started talking from there KJSDKSJD i could talk abt this forever bc so much cute stuff happened but tldr he was like the total package but then i got ghosted BYE

ok thanks for coming to my ted talk as u can see i love talking abt myself pls feel free to ask more but i don't think i have any more romantic experiences atm 😭😭😭 i'm currently trying to manic pixie dream girl one of my guy friends in college so we can see how that goes ig LMAO,,, anyways thanks 4 reading ! interact w this post and give me validation please and thanks <3 (/hj)

[usersasaki]

hello tumblr user usersasaki 🫵 you will never know who i am! (or who knows lol hi karma <3) this anon has been looking into getting into orv but keeps procrastinating like they do on many other things and so asks you, one of their resident orv likers they know, to uh. idk. but feel free to ramble on about why you like orv so much & why someone should get into it (like me!) so maybe i can finally be convinced to read it Now instead of putting it off for later again and again !! ... or something like that 🥺✨

OK GUYS THIS IS NOT A DRILL. THIS IS NOT A DRILLLLL AAAAA HELLO U BEAUTIFUL PERSON I THINK IK WHO U ARE BUT RN I'M SO READY TO CRUSH U IN A BIG HUG REGARDLESS OF THAT

ahem. yes. anyways. i'm totally normal abt this, i totally didn't go feral for a few moments before i started typing this. OK BUT I'M SO READY TO TRY TO CONVINCE U TO READ THIS CUZ WHEN I SAY THIS WEBTOON + WEBNOVEL HAS CHANGED ME ENTIRELY. pls bear with me, giving me a chance to word vomit was not a good idea /hj. i'll put everything under the cut :] and i'll try to keep everything as spoilerless as possible so that u can safely enjoy the story when u get to it

i will apologise in advance for the person i've become, this might end up becoming a HUGE post (edit: i think it did, this is apparently at a lil more than 2k words rn cuz i typed this in google docs for fear of tumblr nuking my entire draft and me having to start all over again)

tldr for those who don't want to go through a 2k essay; orv is for you if you enjoy clean art, stories that will break down your initial expectations and surpass them, and things like found family, love (all kinds), and just an emotional rollercoaster in general. prepare snacks and tissues.

i'll start with the webtoon because that's where it started for me! honestly one of the things i look for most when i start a webtoon is the art. and there are times when even if i like the story, if the art ain't it for me, i'll drop the story 😭💀 but orv has such beautiful and crisp art, very edible art HAHAHA (both webtoon and novel by the way but i'll get to the novel in a bit) it makes me go so O.O sometimes. here's an example of the art, you might've seen it somewhere but i'm still adding it here for the pure beauty of these men named kim dokja and yoo joonghyuk AND ALSO han sooyoung and jung heewon (yes i'm gay, no it's not obvious /j). every character in this webtoon is so well drawn and just. chef's kiss okay, so if you like pretty art, you've got that right here folks.

moving on, the story seems, at first, like a very generic action fantasy webtoon where the world of a novel becomes reality and our mc aka kim dokja is the one who knows how to get to the end and he gets to meet his favourite novel’s protagonist yoo joonghyuk and decides to save the world. but as the story progresses on and on, it becomes so much more than that. the storytelling skills have to be applauded because webtoons can't use lots of words and have to convey things more concisely than their novel counterparts but they've done an amazing job of using the right dialogues in the right places with the right amount of impact. AND as of right now, the story is starting to head towards what i'd like to say is the actual beginning of this webtoon >:) that’s all i can say without spoiling some major things from the novel so,, yeah!

another beautiful part is the portrayal of each of the characters, especially kdj, and their different dynamics with kdj. now kim dokja is our mc and the main narrator of this entire thing so we’re quite limited in that sense because all we see and know is what kim dokja tells us through his narration. a lot of posts have accurately pinned him down as an unreliable narrator because he really only ever shows his companions (and us readers) one part of things and we’re all left to speculate about things. each companion holds a different opinion of kdj but all of them are united in the fact that they trust him to help them get through everything. while the webtoon hasn’t had a chance to explore that yet, i’m looking forward to how they will show it to us :] i’d say that this webtoon is worth a read also because kim dokja is the most mind boggling, intriguing and frustrating character you will ever meet. that’s a fact that’ll get clearer as you get closer to the recent chapters of the webtoon, but i love how he’s relatable in the sense that he both makes me screech in awe but also makes me want to wring his neck with how he is sometimes. i love him *holds him by the neck* (affectionately). oh and when i say every character is just a beautiful piece of art, i mean both their literal art and also the way they’ve been written, though it is more clear in the novel as of right now.

NOW i’m gonna move onto the webnovel because i honestly fell deeper into the rabbit hole purely because of the novel. and sing shong (the author of the webnovel) is an absolute genius for the way they have both intricately and simply pushed a single message throughout the length of the novel. i constantly joke about how reading the orv novel has changed my brain chemistry but i’m not joking most of the time because it really did. in many ways, i’m sure this is a novel i will remember for a very long time to come.

the same points i spoke about for the webtoon stand for the novel as well BUT of course the novel is just immaculately written and it deserves a chance of its own. it’s not that the writing of the novel is extraordinarily fancy or anything, it’s actually quite simple reading without too many complicated words but i think that has a beauty of its own. it’s able to convey what it needs to without having 10 pages of description and that’s awesome to me. there are issues with some things written in the novel but as it isn’t a focus or the point of orv (i got this point from this tumblr post, feel free to read through it if you want to because they have written some great points that can’t be said better by me!), it’s still a novel that entertains you to the fullest.

the characters are admittedly more fleshed out in the novel than the webtoon but that’s because the webtoon is still catching up while the novel is complete (it ended with epilogue chapters but recently the author came out with side stories). the relationships are just very detailed and it gives you a look into not only kim dokja’s head, but also yoo joonghyuk and other characters’ heads as well, though they’re not as common because the majority of the story is in kdj’s point of view. i’ve neglected mentioning other character names so far but kim dokja has a set of the most loyal and sweet and sometimes feral companions besides yoo joonghyuk like yoo sangah, who is someone kdj knew before the novel became their world, jung heewon and lee hyunsung, kdj’s trusty sword and shield, lee gilyoung and shin yoosung, his children (not biological but yes). there’s also lee jihye, an avid yoo joonghyuk follower who insults kdj at every turn but cares for him, and han sooyoung, who is portrayed as a bit of an antagonist or an anti-hero (as far as the webtoon goes anyway wink wink). and a lot of other characters you’ll grow to either love a lot or hate with a passion oR even have your opinion take a whole 180 about as you read on and on, that’s just the kinda novel this is.

don’t even get me started on the underlying themes of this novel. this is me being an english major (and psychology major unintentionally, double major woohoo) through and through but i love analysing characters and figuring out themes that come out through the writing. i won’t go too into the details so that i won’t spoil it for anyone who happens upon this post. but there’s the overarching theme of love; not just romantic love but also platonic love, familial love and the most important one of this novel, self-love. another theme i think is quite relevant and important to this story is more easily relatable to people who read often because it goes into how books can change you BUT you can also change books by reading them over and over again and understanding it better. also how stories can save you but you, as a reader, have the power to save stories by reading them. because in the end, a story continues because you read it. OH I CAN’T FORGET THIS, found family <3 if you’re a fan of found family, this is for you, it’s present throughout the story as a small but encompassing theme.

now this could be just me but i get extremely emotional when it comes to my favourite media, so i squeal with joy at happy parts, sob uncontrollably when sad scenes come up, punch my pillows when something makes me mad⏤ you get my point. and this novel gave me an entire rollercoaster of emotions and made me so URGH in good, bad and ugly ways. it kinda brings me back to my point about kdj being an unreliable narrator since the reason why it gets so hard and sad is because this man never tells anyone anything. he takes it upon himself to do everything, much to the annoyance and despair of his companions and us the readers. we know nothing other than what kdj is willing to tell us, not about his plans, not about him, not about his own feelings. and we’re left to guess and guess until everything is laid bare and then we’re still trying to. process everything. yeah i don’t know if this part is making any sense but i can’t really go into detail without majorly spoiling the story. so you’re gonna have to come back to my post once you’re done to be like “ohhh, right this is what they meant.” /j

To move to a lighter and probably my last point, the novel illustrations are gold i tell you. it’s done by a person named blackbox or bb-nim for short and i love just going through their art for fun. of course, if you’re reading it on a website like i did, then you’re not going to see the illustrations side by side so you should definitely check out blackbox’s twitter which i’ve linked here :] you’ll probably also find their art on pinterest. gorgeous art i tell you, BUT BUT BUT there are spoilers here and there so beware if you go digging through their media tab on their twt. I’ll put some of my favourite pieces that are as non-spoiler as possible under this

so. yeah. these are my reasons for why you should read both the orv webtoon and novel. In the end, all i can say is that if you give them a chance, you’ll probably get hooked just as i did. i knew to a certain extent about how the novel was but nothing prepared me enough but i’m not complaining because it is genuinely so good. i’ll add a list of content warnings here that i got from the wiki page because i don’t want anyone to be ambushed by anything they’re not comfortable with reading: graphic violence, death and murder, depression, anxiety, suicidal ideation, suicide, body horror, dissociation, transphobia (this might be a deal breaker and it would be for me too as a nonbinary person but it’s not a major focus and happens a couple times throughout the story), cephalopods, tentacles (yes these are real content warnings on the wiki HAHAHA), and finally hospitals.

to all of you who actually read this far, thank you! you are a great person for reading through a random person on the internet go on and on about a webtoon and novel, hope you have an awesome day/night ahead of you! if you have any questions about things in the webtoon or novel, feel free to hit me up, i’m always down to have conversations about orv (none of my irls have read it but i will use this essay to convince one of them to give it a chance so wish me luck). anyway, peace out folks! :]

[jaassmmmiinne0420]

Sorry

GraysonDolan and others liked

👤 - @Itz_Rosa @Megster @GraysonDolan

@EthanDolan

EmiCore : We had a time last night 😆

Itz_Rosa - We sure tf did🤭

Megster - How did I even get home

GraysonDolan - Em you know how to throw a party

EthanDolan - That's not the only thing she knows how to throw 😏

EmiCore - @EthanDolan ayo🤨

Grayson 🥸 - Hey Emi ..

Me - Hey bailey

Grayson🥸 - I didn't tell you that so you could call me that 🙄

Me - Mm but you kind of did tho 🙂

Grayson 🥸 - Anyways ... soo about saturday

Me - I know it was so fun I did that 😌

Grayson 🥸 - Well yeah but I'm talking about what happened in the bathroom

Me - ??

Grayson - You don't remember?

Fuck yeah I remember but I'm just embarrassed that i tried kissing that man, ugh i'll just admit to it there's no point of pretending that it didn't happen

Me - Yeah I do .. 🤦🏻‍♀️

Me - I'm sorry, I shouldn't have done that grayson can you forgive me?

Grayson 🥸 - Ofc Em (:

Me - Good I don't want it to be awkward between us (:

Grayson 🥸 - Me either Em

Grayson 🥸 - Just one question tho

Me - Wassup ?

Grayson 🥸 - What made you want to kiss me ?

Fuck. How do I answer this ? Should I just be honest and tell him how it felt like it was only us, and how I felt like i was floating when I felt his touch. Or should I just lie and say it was the drinks in me because if I'm being honest it was a little bit of both I just don't know if I should even pursue this UGH! I need to get out of my fucking head and be straight up!

Me - Come over let's talk

Grayson 🥸 - okay 🫡

Fuck I really just sent that ... oh well there's no going back now, what the fuck am I even going to say to him.

Authors Note : Sorry about another short chapter, I had another book idea and ik idk why i'm thinking abt another book when i'm not even no where near finished with this one anyway as always lmk what you guys think xoxo J🩷

[imnotreal-png]

:T -- Entri 3

Liking people is becoming a hassle tbh. I'm definitely part of the issue but not in the way you think.

Im not hung up on anyone or anything, i'm just broke. My style is nonexistent, my confidence has depleted,,,,nothings stable rn.

I canceled a date i had tomorrow. Super sweet guy, super attractive but idk if he's not for me or what because i was dreading it. So i texted him and told him the honest truth. Literally what i just told you basically.

im tired of not having an income. i only have so much stashed away specifically for clothes and i never have the chance to go shopping. I should probably go this wednesday

I keep eating fruits with nutella every chance i get. tbh i been eating a lot lately (aloooot of boiled eggs) and im happy abt it. hopefully this goes on for a while til i gain at least something.

my sex drive been high tho. pleasing myself as always. wish sex wasnt viewed the way it is.....sigh

muzik stuff been goin very smoothly. i have little panic moments where im like "omygosh i cant make anymore music, i've milked all the talent ive got, its so over" and then 3 weeks later on a random tuesday; i'll get locked into fl studio for 7-10 hours and come out w a whole new beat and song lol. i shud hate on myself less probably.

I have a few songs that still havent even been scheduled for release lol, maybe i shud relax a bit. im still waiting for good weather 2 record this mv with my friend 4 our song ahhhghghghgh hopefully it works out

i wonder if im going to stay in the city. like where will i be living in 10 years? i hope i'll be okay. i have no idea what im doing rn. i love what im studying and working for but ik deep down its mostly just so i can have a degree and stable outcome bc otherwise i'd continue being an entrepreneur somehow...maybe? idk im just talking shit rn. scared i guess.

trying to reject the idea that im "falling behind" on life bc it makes me feel super shitty even tho its technically true but no point in making myself feel overly miserable abt it.

i wish i was pretty like them

nite nite

[sugar-omi]

okay first of all dw i get you, like ive had intentions to talk to ppl but then im like ",,,nah" LIKE I DONT WANNA TALK ABT FINDING A JOB OR SMTH LIKE IM JUST CHECKING YOU'RE ALIVE GO AWAY<////3

its times like that ik why i got 99-100% introvert on my mbti test

also YES LISTEN I'LL TELL YOU HOW I DID IT BC THIS IS HOW I DO EVEYRTHING, I JUST IMAGINE EVERYTHING A SLIKE A FUCKING COMING OF AGE MOVIE BC THATS THE LIFE IM LIVING IN MY HEAD RIGHT LMAO

i also use a lotta metaphors n say very poetic shit i just,,, the writer is deep and it is a little demon controlling me

MOVING ON OMG WHY AM I ALL OVER THE PLACE

i'm getting so many ideas... maybe lee asking if aloma is, well aloma, and crying bc she missed her so much and it was so scary, so hard for her to just be gone

i imagine its not too long before aloma comes out, seeing the pained expression of her family when they think people aren't looking isn't hard to miss, especially when you keep watching everyone because you've missed them.

ALSO I HAD A FEELING ABT THE SCAR OMG IM GLAD I WAS RIGHT

the family and cove would be so upset, they'd cry harder knowing they weren't there to protect or help aloma. everyone hates they didn't notice sooner, didn't do something sooner so aloma never ran away in the first place.

oh i also imagine the only reason the moms haven't noticed sooner is because they're just going through the motions most days, they all are actually

when i'm upset i kinda have like tunnel vision the whole day/week, even someone i was talking to a moment ago i won't remember exactly what we talked about. or their face/features.

i purposefully avoid making eye contact anyway, but more so during this time bc its hard. so aloma looks so much like their aloma, its hard to look sometimes. always glancing away, or not looking in the first place.

or everything is moving so fast, they're trying to escape thee conversation or situation as fast as possible and they don't take the time to study aloma's face, don't notice even the obvious things because today was too rough.

cove probably wouldn't think too much of the way aloma reacts to the shop either. mm unless aloma went smth like, "it'd be nice if there was a magician around here. those are fun, dont you think cove?"

he'd be a bit curious, but he'd be so hurt at the memory from shopping w her during step 1 he might not think about it until he's trying to sleep at night.

!!! another thought, cove probably thinks that baxter is aloma's boyfriend

never says anything bc, she's just a tourist, that's inappropriate.

but after crying in each others arms, having a heart to heart and breaking through the layer of hurt and regret, cove would ask either then or later on in the morning bc "wait, aren't you dating baxter?"

and aloma is like "ew what're you talking about? we're like siblings"

aloma and baxter would be so close, like maybe holding hands or hugging a lot, just very affectionate and joking a lot. cove isn't use to seeing sibling dynamics like that, or friends like that. ofc terry and randy are silly in their own right, but i think seeing how close aloma is with baxter makes cove yearn.

he wants to know everything about her, and when baxter and arden catch him outside, having just came back from their own lunch date and they invite cove in.

small talk and awkward silence later, cove mumbles, so soft it wouldn't be heard if it wasn't for the silence of baxter's condo.

"please, tell me everything i missed..."

wants to know all the things aloma won't tell him. of course not the sad or personal stories, but the embarrassing ones. or the little habits she adapted. the things that made her laugh, her favorite flower or food.

some things, arden and baxter tell him to ask her himself, but they do say "be careful, please take care of her. she's yearned for sunset bird and it's people for a long time."

of course they don't say anything she wouldn't like, they'll say some classic protective and teasing (big) sibling things, but otherwise usher cove out the door where he runs into aloma who is surprised, but laughs it off and says "what a coincidence, i was just uh.. i was just going to see you." aloma laughs, rubbing her cheek or some other nervous tick cove takes notice of. "wanna.. go see something cool?"

and takes cove to that field of poppies in "happiness" where they smile and laugh and cry.

cove, tucking hair behind aloma's ear. "i wanna know everything about you" "... it's not all pretty." "maybe, but its you."

and she tells him about the beginning, how opal took her in and tried to convince her things aren't as bad as they seem, that now is better than never but of course it didn't work, and she would never push a child out of her home.

and she tells him the in betweens, the funny and the stupid, the chaotic and the hurt/comfort stories. tells him the little things in between those, down to her 2 neighbors favorite colors and how arden toppled everyone over, her and tama trying to follow qiu's moves

told him about the hushed conversations she had under the stars, about the secrets shared in the dark between her and arden as children. not the personal ones, but the ones where they had a crush on some kid with red hair or called a teacher mom, the little ones but big enough to make a 13+ year old crumble in embarrassment

and they laugh, they laugh until they cry and choke and then they cry. well, cove cries mostly.

aloma looks up at the stars, white poppies framing her head and she's laughing, smiling and waving her hands to animate the story and cove flips over, trying to wipe away the tears slowly slipping down.

"cove? what's wrong...?" aloma touches his back, hesitant. cove reaches around, holding her hand.

"i just.. wanna experience those things with you too." cove cries, shaking "im jealous. i know i shouldnt be but..."

aloma is silent, and cove almost apologies but silently, brought to him by the breeze. "we're doing that now aren't we?"

and cove turns around, shocked, but he searches aloma's glassy eyes and then he cries, nodding. and he holds her hand tighter, tangling their fingers together for comfort

imagine the 'indifference route' was a bad dream crush/love Mc was having one night and when they tell Cove about it he is equally crept out and unsettled by the idea that there could've been a reality where they weren't as close as they are now. Where they didn't even *try* to be closer.

and when he learns that the indifferent version of him never even came over the day Mc learned about their biological parents, and weren't there to listen and comfort them, I think that would shock him the most. That this version of him wasn't there for the love of his life in moments like this.

one of the things that keep me up at night ever since I played and regretted the indifferent route. Never again.

omg he'd cry

he'd even apologize

he can't imagine not being apart of your life, he loves you so much. if you're dating he's ruined but if you're still crushing he'd even more ruined

which you'd think it'd be the other way but it's not, although you prbly couldn't tell the difference much but trust me, his heart hurts double. the idea of not being interest in you hurts more especially when he hasn't told you how he feels.

if there's a world, even in a dream, where you aren't interest in each others lives in any way, then there could be a world where he pines after you while you have no interest in him at all

cove can't imagine not loving you at all, so the idea of your disinterested, especially if it's direct and he can see the visible distance-or worst, annoyance- in your gaze

would end up confessing bc he can't let smth like that happen. if it's in step 3 before the end of summer/ happiness moment. he's even more upset bc he's alrdy worried abt the future n you losing touch

if you're dating he'd prbly cry m ask you to marry him bc he can't live like that, is joking abt it when he says it but does want it (if you want it too ofc)

either way what's you to know he wants you, loves you, and at this point Needs to be in your life bc he needs you like water

[astrxealis]

dion :]