#okay i'm still anxious but

[noxtivagus]

i made a new friend who likes ff today hehe

[chalkrub]

ralsei deltarune by request <:^)

[deoidesign]

.

[iraprince]

Hiii, i love your stuff and kinda from a distance really look up at you for, in my perception, being able to express yourself without giving a fuck. Thats sick dude, Im so so afraid, of absolutely everything, its nice to think like i might grow into someone less apologetic of my existence. Nice to see people just being yknow

hey, thank you, this is really really nice. the secret that is probably not a secret is that i am also deeply afraid a lot of the time lmao -- but less than i used to be, and in ways that feel less stifling and self-suffocating, if that makes sense.

like, it used to be "i'm scared that if i express myself the way i want to, everyone will find me obnoxious, so let's just sand those edges down to be safe" -- now my fears are more like "now that i'm expressing myself in a way that feels natural and real, i'm afraid that it's all stupid/vapid/not worthwhile or meaningful" (<- specifically abt my art) or "i'm happy that i talk and act the way i want to now, but what if it makes me impossible to befriend," etc etc etc. which still feels bad and puts me in a funk a lot of the time but at least it's a fear that comes After/in reaction to doing stuff, rather than a fear that STOPS me from doing stuff, you know? like, it's evolved into a kind of fear that's less in my way.

anyway. i believe you'll experience something like this, because wanting to grow is the first step of growing. the fact that u hope or wish for something different means you're already on your way. to fewer fucks!! or at least distributing the fucks u give in a way that serves u better

[icewindandboringhorror]

"We can get through this by working together, reach out to your friends, community is all we have, a social network will be your security in the world, now is the time to lean on others!"

I do agree, and it's scientifically sound (pretty sure there is data about how people with better social networks live longer and etc) but also....augh..... what about the severe social issues, difficulty to leave the house, physical issues which lead to like zero socialization energy a majority of the time, etc. etc. Social support can be a replacement for structural support, but.. I guess I just wish it didn't have to be. Community is extremely difficult to build, even moreso if you're someone who has issues with social cues or group conversations or even just being around others in the first place. And blah, nuance, of course I'm just complaining or maybe being too negative or maybe misunderstanding, but, I hardly have the energy to brush my hair once every 2 months.. how am I supposed to maintain a wide social network and be active in a Community and Join Groups lol... sometimes it kind of feels like "er.. well if thats my only option then...... ruh roh". It's overwhelming

[dilfmobius]

you guys want some abandoned gifs/gif sets?? i started these a few weeks ago for the one year anniversary of loki s2e5 😭

i think my concept for the set was to format all my gifs like the first one but it just wasn't working out, so i switched gears and the other 3 gifs are the result of that.

i was just struggling with what kind of fonts i wanted and how to format the text, and then i wasn't happy with the blending, and it just turned into one of those things where the more i looked at them and the more i edited them, the more i was like. ew. sdfhgsfdf

i don't think they're Bad Gifs, i was very pleased with the idea (i made another 4 base gifs without the text ffs), but i just lost steam. maybe i'll finish the set at some point, but rn i've decided to finally start my loki + primadonna by marina gifset after putting that off for months LOL

anyway just wanted to put these here because i'm still proud of them and i hope you all like them too, even if their full set might never be released 😭💖

[blue-thief]

tearing up over the bridge of on my way? no. shut up

[theloveinc]

i don't really want to bc like. there's many reasons for me to stay but. i don't think this tumblr life is for me anymore

[zipquips]

i rememorized how to solve a rubik's cube!

[politemagic]

To The Surface

Vessel always finds himself plagued by nightmares around the anniversary of his death. Even though he won't ask for comfort, choosing instead to suffer in silence, II takes notice, taking it upon himself to watch over him through the night.

II always has and always will protect Vessel, even if it means breaking one of their sacred rules.

Word Count: 855

a/n: It is implied here that Vessel and II knew each other prior to becoming vessels for Sleep. For a little context here, each member has died and been resurrected by Sleep, meaning Vessel's suicide attempt was successful. This is my first non-silly foray into writing for Sleep Token, it's just a little something I wrote last night, but feedback is greatly appreciated🖤

AO3

He was drowning again.

The water was prying at his lips, taunting his nostrils, begging him to give in, to slip away. He knew it was easier not to fight it, to let his body sink to the bottom and succumb to the darkness.

He began to part his lips, the water clawing its way in when he heard it, so faint he swore he had imagined it. Then he heard it again, louder, clearer.

His name.

He hadn’t heard it in so long, so long he had almost forgotten it entirely. It belonged to the face beneath his mask, the face he tried so desperately to forget. The face he concealed by his mask. 

The familiar voice cut through the water, wrapping itself around his torso and dragging him to the surface, his name echoing through his mind as he broke through to the air above…

Vessel gasped, shooting up in what he could vaguely recognize as his bed, sending someone toppling off the side onto the floor below. His chest heaved as he blinked furiously, trying to gain awareness of his surroundings. Tears spilled down his cheeks as sobs racked his body.

Then he heard it again, the same voice from his dream, whispering his name. A gentle hand came to his shoulder accompanied by another soft utterance of his name as he trembled, a pair of warm arms wrapping around him.

II kneeled on the bed beside Vessel and pulled him into his chest, letting him bury his face in his neck, rubbing soothing circles on his back as he sobbed. His nightmares had been getting worse recently, and II was starting to seriously worry about him. He knew that Vessel was often too embarrassed to come to any of them for comfort, even after all they’d been through together. So for the past two weeks he’d been setting alarms throughout the night to come check on him and make sure he was safe. Tonight, when he peeked into his bedroom, the sight of Vessel thrashing against the covers had sent him into a panic. He tried waking him, but nothing seemed to be able to snap him out of it. 

II knew he shouldn’t have done it, knew Sleep would likely be angry with him even if Vessel forgave him for using his true name. They were no longer the men they were, only vessels for Sleep, they had no name. But one look at the anguish on Vessel’s face pulled it from his lips involuntarily, a desperate attempt to help him. 

And it worked.

They stayed like that for the better part of an hour wrapped in each other, the room silent except for the heart wrenching sounds coming from deep within Vessel’s chest. Finally, Vessel tugged his face away from II’s neck, blinking away the tears as he sniffled. II brought his hand up to cup Vessel’s face, gently rubbing his thumb against his cheek. 

“You said my name,” Vessel croaked. “You really shouldn’t do that.”

“I tried not to. But you… you wouldn’t wake up.” II whispered, the concern evident in his voice. Vessel sighed, his eyes falling closed as he leaned his forehead against II’s shoulder.

“They’re getting bad again.” He said after a moment of silence.

“Are they all the same?” II asked. Vessel had told him once about the nightmares that plagued him around this time of year. Vessel nodded as he pulled away again, his eyes falling to his trembling hands. 

“But this one was…” Vessel trailed off, swallowing thickly. II gently took his hands, offering a reassuring squeeze. “Normally it’s silent, I’m just alone in this… nothingness. But this time, I could hear something. I could hear you.”

“Me?”

“I could hear you calling my name, and it felt like you were pulling me out of it. Like you were… saving me.” Vessel confessed, bringing his gaze back up to meet II’s eyes.

The vulnerable look in Vessel’s eyes snatched the words from his throat, he was already a man of few words even in less emotionally charged situations. So instead of speaking, he just wrapped his arms around Vessel’s shoulders and pulled him into a hug, clutching him tightly against his body. II felt Vessel’s arms wrap around his middle, the tension in his body slowly melting away as he let himself relish in II’s comforting embrace.

“I’m always going to save you.” II mumbled, holding back tears of his own. Vessel began to pull away, and II reluctantly released him.

“Would you stay with me? Just tonight?” He asked quietly, his lip quivering, and II immediately nodded.

“Of course.”

They laid facing each other, II’s hand running along Vessel’s side as they spoke in hushed whispers about nothing at all until Vessel’s eyes began to flutter closed. II smiled to himself as he watched his face relax as a peaceful slumber overtook him. He lifted his hand to brush the hair from his face, saying a silent prayer to Sleep to protect him from the darkness this time. He still laid awake until the sun rose though, just to make sure.

[caspersickfanfics]

Some very novice fanart of Here for You by @aeryssickfics, which I simply cannot recommend enough!!! I've already lost count of how many times I've read it. There's something about Tighnari's vulnerability in that fic which I absolutely love!!

Took some liberties with his hand and feet anatomy because I couldn't be bothered to figure out if canon has anything to say about that. Also, I just want him to have claws, so that he can use them if he needs to :) And I put him in a comfy shirt because I could not possibly have pulled off his usual outfit because he deserves it =v=

Non-textured version under the cut for those who prefer a smoother look!

[dangerousdan-dan]

So uh, I'm genuinely starting to feel nervous about this hurricane...

[moonchild-in-blue]

Everyone clap, I actually went out with friends instead of being sad alone 👏👏

[pierswife]

Hi everyone! Just as a blanket statement: Happy Holidays and Merry Christmas! I hope everyone who celebrates Christmas has a wonderful day and that you spend the holiday in the way that makes you happy and that you enjoy. And for anyone who doesn't celebrate Christmas or prefers not to, the same sentiment goes to you! I hope you have a wonderful and restful day!

Love you all!!

[altschmerzes]

🌹

thank youuuuu after the encouragement to commit on this scene and others like it in the first place, a bit from The Cuddling Part in the qpr two aces fic -

Then Dani’s hand moves, settling on Jamie’s side. He leaves it there, his thumb moving in slow strokes over the ridge of bone at the bottom of Jamie’s ribcage. There are callouses on his palm that Jamie can feel, slightly rough against his skin. It’s beyond frightening but he doesn’t want it to stop. He thinks he might die if it stopped, actually, if that gentle touch was gone and he was left to lay here, cold enough to shiver without it. It doesn’t leave. It stays, pressing a little harder after a while, like the way that Jamie has relaxed and leaned back into Dani’s chest, not flinching again since that first time, has given him permission to settle in too.

[heartshattering]

Interacted with people outside! Brain is loud right now and I'm remembering my mistakes but trying not to! I still put forth an effort and even if I wasn't a perfect human I'm still glad to have showed up and talked to people!