#okay i'm really going to bed now
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I have some Colin headcanons because it's 1am and apparently, this is what I'm thinking about tonight. Headcanons based solely on the show - Book!Colin is just a different animal.
Some time after the whole Marina incident, he and Anthony had a very uncomfortable conversation about how and where he can go get laid. Benedict found out about it, and finds it hilarious
He totally lost his virginity to the Contessa. Like - he DOES NOT shut up about her.
And she seduced him - because I just cannot imagine him ever having that much game. (Colin is not a liar, but he is kinda dumb and rather pretty, and I'm sure this woman knew what she was doing.)
She also is the one who taught him how to properly pleasure a woman (c'mon, he had to learn that from somewhere and I highly doubt /that/ was something Anthony or Benedict was going to go into-though that'd have been a hilarious convo.), plus, while the European Tour was definitely his slut era, I'm guessing 99% of that was at brothels.
(Though, I am amused by the idea of Colin asking so many questions at the brothels and the sex workers being like... okay, my dude, usually sex does not include this much talking.)
Also, slut era isn't as slutty as he lets on when he gets back. I mean, he only keeps telling the ONE story. And sure, discovering sex is fun, but as he writes in his journal, doesn't stop loneliness or provide genuine connection.
How many times did he end up at a brothel after he wrote to Pen and thought about the fact that he's been hearing nothing back from her?
#bridgerton#colin bridgerton#it's now 2am and i should sleep#the whole contessa thing just was a fascinating point#was this a book related easter egg?#or just isn't into slutting it up the way his friends are doing#it's a rhetorical question#the idea of what anthony and benedict could have taught him is kind of a hilarious side tangent#okay i'm really going to bed now
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Swiftli week, day 4
Free theme! (Laser tag)
Summary:
“I’d easily get more hits on you than you on me!” Taylor claims.
Lincoln’s smile turns into a playful smirk. “Oh is that right?”
Taylor leans in, standing on his tiptoes to get a little bit closer to Lincoln’s level. It makes him think of those professional boxing stare-showdowns. “Yea, that’s right, Mr. Li-Wilson.”
“You’re on, Swift.”
“Guys, we literally just finished the first game,” Normal tries to pipe up in between the two, “Maybe it's time for a little break first?”
“No! Someone has to taste true defeat,” Taylor shouts and points to the air, like an anime character ready for the fight, and picks up his laser tag armor again.
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OR:
Lincoln and Taylor get a little too competitive in a game of laser tag and are willing to do everything to win
#I'm so so tired#not going to write and edit a fic again in like 2 days in combination with theater preperation stuff and university stuff#but wooow yeaaa a laser tag fic with swiftli#dndads#dndads s2#dungeons and daddies#swiftli#taylor swift#lincoln li wilson#fanfic#my writing#dndads swiftli week 2024#anyways I'm going to sleep now good night#i might reread the story again tomorrow and make a few more edits because I don't believe that all spelling errors have been taken out now#okay I'm really going to bed now
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SEVERANCE 2x10 | "They give us half a life and think we won't fight for it."
#severance#severance spoilers#severanceedit#myedits#as someone who is still pretty new to gif making i would like to whinge about the red light#it looks fabulous in the show - it is a nightmare to try and edit#that last one nearly fucking broke me i do not know how to noise-reduce any further than i have without making it look shit#because the red reflects off her face and then is actually ON her face and then asdalsdnlasknlaksasdkjk#i've seen gifs that have done it way better than this - someone teach me how to do that plz?#also i've never tried black and white and i'm not sure how i feel about it i 👏 have 👏 no 👏 idea 👏 what 👏 i 👏 am 👏 doing 👏👏#i don't think black and white really works with the flickering fireplace light tbh#but this is where we're at i guess and i'm not changing it now i need to go to bed#but also hi hello i need to yell about this show with somebody#i have no severance fans in my life and it is a PROBLEM because i need to make a lot of noise about it#i'm having a GA next week and i'm pretty concerned that i'm in so deep thinking about this fucking show that i'm going to wake up#and just instantly start talking fucking gibberish about innies and outies and ortbos and goats#apparently i woke up from a GA once and just started reciting a cookie recipe and refused to shut up#anyhow#someone come be my severance buddy because i need to discuss but fyi: i am firmly team#innie-mark/helly (but also outie-mark/helena because it's spicyyyy) and i love gemma but i'm ... okay? ... with how the season ended?#don't @ me - i contain multitudes#and for better or worse i will unapologetically chose helly in every universe#and in closing can i just say what a win this season has been for the hand-porn enthusiasts we are winning my friends#also cobel's hair looks like a bad wig for some reason okay goodnight everybody enjoy the internet
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HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ONE VERY SPECIAL HAJIME HINATA !!!!!! new year's kisses for the birthday boy :)
#martzipan#hajime hinata#chiaki nanami#nagito komaeda#komahinanami#komahina#hinanami#ok that's all the tags. ERMMM TEEHEE !!! i had fun with this one#which kinda surprises me. bc it's been a while since i've drawn#but. kmhnnm reigns supreme in my head always and forever. my little muses#you can tell i had no clue what typa outfit to put kmda in. but it's ok i got to show off the neck so it's fine <3#there's one specific detail in here that i really enjoyed adding. and i'm curious to see if anyone will notice it#if not it's a treat for me but. potential game for the keen viewers out there#OKAY i'm done rambling now. gonna go do some cooldowns and then Go To Bed bc i have just barely managed to evade a headache#happy new year folks <3
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I love ur artstyle they all look so squishy and cute <3
Ahksbjdbkjbdkjbdkj thank you!! ;-; I do want everyone to look kinda round and squishy and plush and I'm really glad you like it ^^
Also, because I actually had time for once and I wanted to do a doodle, attempted squishery:

#UTDR#Ask#toffeebrew#In the end he was indeed squished#Rip in pieces Killer you will be squished- I mean missed#But for realsies thank you!!! That really means a lot <3#Also I love how you draw Cross with his lil fangs showing so so much#Like it just activates something happy in my brain#And the comic of Epic telling how Killer and Color met is so funny I'm still not over it#It's going in my forever memory for this fandom#Okay now I gotta go to bed for realsies goodnight everyone!!!
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this is a drawing please don't come after me
#käärijä#häärijä#khaarija calendar#digital art#is this okay to post? i really don't know#i'll delete it if it isn't#i've overdone it again with the details#(also it looks like jere is making a peace sign lol)#okay i'm going to bed now#i did not plan to spend four hours on this lmao
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Annddd one more silly fucking shitpost before i sleep, it is now 5 am, my ass is going to BED.
Idk its just a silly postt <3 Suggestive??? not really
just me being a fuckin crazy person over coyle <3
guys please don't unfollow me i swear I'll be more tame for yall
#the outlast trials#outlast trials#hyperfixationbrainrot#leland coyle#mentioned#I'm just really gay for him guys#scoutsurgerambles#OKAY IM GOING TO BED NOW GODNIGHT
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#ok finally making a post about meds#I've not ever tried taking medication before. I was sorta raised with that classic 'dont rely on meds you have to learn to manage without'#I mean I was also raised with the idea that therapy is stupid unless you have 'real' trauma. and also like idk.#can't stay home from school unless your temp is over 100 or you're throwing up. etc. very suck it up mindset#so I was just really nervous to start. also of course worried about losing myself or whatever I know that's a silly fear but#it's also a common fear for a reason!!! anyways#so I finally was like 'I need to do something' when I realized I was so anxious I couldnt even get myself to go outside alone#like I just don't want to do ANYTHING alone to a detrimental effect. and it was butting into my ability to do my work...#for various reasons. but then ALSO adhd has been a constant issue with my work as well!#it is SO hard to write and draw on a weekly pace like I am without being able to focus#my whole life I've had these terrible nightmares constantly and I've always woken up constantly in the night#sleep has always been terrible so I've always dreaded going to bed.. ESPECIALLy because it didnt even make me less tired#it was more something that I just did because I had to.#but going to bed was always terrible. there have been times I was too scared to go to sleep for weeks on end...#I've been mitigating this for years of course. and recently I've been taking melatonin which has been helping too.#but I've also always struggled to get up. because I've always been EXTREMELY exhausted#but also anxious of what the day might bring... idk.#anyways it has all hit a point that I was like okay. I am doing as many coping mechanisms as I can. the psych said they were good too#but... it just has never been enough. it's never been enough to make me not tired it's never been enough to make me not scared#so I finally talked to the doc about it. and she was like youve def got smth wrong basically. which yah I know.. but yknow#anyways so I started taking wellbutrin. and I am so frustrated now. because it's WORKING#that constant looming sense of dread is gone. I'm excited to get up. I'm excited to go to bed BECAUSE I'm excited to get up#I feel like for years I've been holding on to the idea that I have to get up because I have to put something good out into the world#and I've been clinging to knowing that if nothing else. I am able to help other people feel better.#but now for the first time in my life I'm like. free of it. I didnt even know it was possible... and I'm so sad how much I've lost out on#and so frustrated how my whole life I've been told to put up with it and push through it. and treated like a failure for it being too much.#and just. It has only been 2 weeks. but the lack of anxiety is SO noticeable I'm so...#I'll never miss it. the adhd is still pretty present but like whatever. I can manage that better.#and I'm just crying because of all this combined.#I just. I hope I get to finally be the best I can be now. for myself but also for you guys!
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sometimes i get a note on my <redacted> sideblog and i'm like oh yeah that was a thing
#lol i was obsessed with something so cringe in 2021-22#i am free now <3#sidenote: i am soo annoyed right now and i don't know why? like i'm overstimulated i guess but i am turning into the most massive bitch eve#jess asked me to help them buy some things on ebay and the seller is a Moron. so i am having to message this foolish cunt.#that damn sink is Still running :)))))))))))) <- this is my 'i am about to lose it silverback gorilla style' face#it's slightly warm in here. my uterus is still rearranging itself. i haven't washed my hair in a While. and i'm kind of tired.#also i need a giant to ring my spine out like a washcloth.#ALSO charlie's appointment was today and the vet found nothing wrong with her. gave jess some like... squirty gel for hairballs???#and also said we could give her zyrtec??? which is a human allergy medication. i don't know why the fuck that would help but okay???#so yeah. cat mystery unsolved. house intolerable. live =/= worth living#??? goddd i just wanna read my book and go to bed but i also need to message my besties back bc i have been a shit about that lately.#and also i have asks. and i wanted to post some wipw stuff (bc i wrote a massive amount last time and saved some bc i knew the uterus#was about to Act Up and i wouldn't feel good for writing)#so like i have some done and ready to goooo but UGHHH posting things TWT#also sigh. i just i really need to be medicated and/or given a padded room to go insane in lol#diaerie
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Thank you♡
To all the new followers and everyone who's down with me drawing their MCs and OCs♡ (๑>◡<๑)
Everyone has been soo sweet♡ and i'm just really happy to finally find my fire to draw again☆!
I dunno what else to say i'm just happy and i wanted to say thank you♡(>ᴗ•)
#mewsmuse#mewsyaps#obey me mc#i dunno just feeling happy and giddy over doing art#☆♡☆#also work on the wedding pics is coming along good#i have several sketches rn and should probably decide which ones to fully render rn or i'll be busy for the next month lol#asdfghjkl wedding dresses are soo pretty♡#still going bahooties over the thought of marrying mamms♡♡♡♡#also def gonna make an angel oc at some point#eeee im just so giddy about so many fun things too draw☆♡☆!#OMG I FORGOT TO GET BACK TO ACTUALLY PLAYING OBEY ME FUCK GOTTA CATCH UP WHOOPS#welp i'll get to that tonight before bed♡#also i forgot to mention i just finished painting my nails again☆ this time i'm matching with asmo♡#eeeee his colorway always makes me feel so cute♡!#everytime i got with his nail colors i keep hoping someone will recognize the colors while im out#dunno if that's me being to extra but it'd make me happy♡#someday!#okay im gonna stop yapping now i'm just really cozy and happy rn♡#which is nice cuz yesterday i went through a L O T of big emotions so having a cozy day is really nice♡♡#okay fr gonna stop yapping now#thank you if anyone read all this i hope you have a lovely weekend♡♡♡! take care xoxo
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Thoughts on the new DMC trailer?
Going to be honest I haven't watched any trailers since the trailer at the Game Awards (or whichever one I have those 2 breakdown posts for) 😅 I keep seeing the trailer announcements when I don't have my headphones on me, and I've been behind on watching them once I have the time... maybe tomorrow I'll finally get to watching them! Tonight I'm dead tired so I don't think I'd be in much of a good mood and I don't want to start off on the wrong foot, so to speak. When I watch them I can make a write up on it though! Would probably be fun.
#work is exploding and also i'm trying to read more and study latin#and i'm also doing ultimate raising in ffxiv and have been making guides for my static bc most of them haven't cleared yet#raiding not raising*#then yesterday i had a game (sports) so i really just had no time for anything....#i've been trying to get through my backlog of ao3 comments too#so with all that taken into account....i have barely had any time for absorbing new fandom material or contributing#i haven't written any fic in a week or two#actually. have i written anything since the dmc3 anniversary nearly a month ago...?#i think i opened a fic once but i doubt i added much#most of my time in my docs has been devoted to analyzing moby dick#...which i'm doing for fun#but yeah. so many obligations. i've been pulling unofficial overtime for work. and i'm kind of over my head right now#so i haven't had nearly as much time for dmc stuff as i would like...#i spent part of my drive home today thinking about something i'd like to do with one of my wips#(when i wasn't panicking about that one person who tried to ram into me for about 10-12 minutes in bumper to bumper-#-traffic in the rain. that was 'fun'. and by fun i mean terrifying. i got the heat inducing anxiety and if that person didn't let off-#-soon i was genuinely considering calling 911 because it was. bad. they nearly hit me so many times and kept honking....#even though there was nowhere to go..mand almost rammed me into the barrier on the bridge...#today has been a very long day. it's 9:14pm and everything i've done today has been work or raid besides like 20min of tumblr)#okay enough rambling for now i've gotta get ready for bed#i didn't even get home from my basketball game until after 10 last night and i had to be awake at 5:30 and barely slept last week#so i'm running on many days of sub 7hours of sleep and i am not good at that. i get so exhausted.#so yeah!!!#ty for question i really do mean to watch it i just haven't found the time#i want to give it the proper attention when i watch it. and by it i mean them. all the trailers#erurandomness#erudmc
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no longer tiny joys tuesday but it's been a pretty rocky week so far so some things from today that have given me some encouragement:
washed my hair (<- always makes me feel less gross)
was productive (and it wasn't as much of a mental battle to focus/be productive like it was yesterday)! particularly in writing a lot of my journal spreads (something i've been behind on and takes a lot of effort for me to do), i did it while listening through a new playlist & drinking coffee & i enjoyed the whole process & am way more caught up
finished a drawing i started last night
read two more chapters of my book; i'm nearing the end and it's still so good ;;
spent some time (being productive) at a cafe with my brother :)
^ he & i watched another episode of hilda once we got home, while i ate a pb&j sandwich, and he's enjoying it and i'd forgotten how much of a comfort show it is for me :))
drove to/from the cafe And to/from the grocery store and! felt considerably less stressed about it than i have my previous driving trips!! also my brother is a very patient & great driving teacher & i am very grateful for him
spent the evening writing/editing poetry & making Processing journal spreads (which i haven't done in a Very Long Time [since...july??] it is. so so good for my brain.) & listening to new truth-music (anchor hymns <3) & feeling a bit more of God's comfort/compassion/grace than i have in awhile <3
#the driving! i noticed once we got back home that i think it was the least stressful trip yet :) and my brother commented 'you're getting#better and better! you're way smoother with the clutch now and you've made tons of progress :)'#whoooooo okay. yeah. this was nice to list#lots lots of emotions in my head & heart. helpful to recenter it all on some gratitude <3#i just finished eating dinner (really late but i got stuck in hyperfocus earlier sdlkjg) and now i'm gonna go back to art journaling#for the next few hours until i'm done/go to bed#love you all <3#elle rambles#also re my last point i know God's grace/compassion/presence is there even if i don't feel it. but.. it is nice to sense it a bit more some#times yknow ;;
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eepy author
the author is very tired, she is eepy. the author has had a very long day of writing and wants to take just a smol sleeb. She eeby and neebies to sleeby.
#okay i'm really going to bed this time 😂#needed to answer this#goodnight everyone#the author is going to sleeby now#answered
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hi!!i shouldve asked this already considering how long I've been here,can I join the fam? :3
OH ABSOLUTELY TEM! :D
Tho idk if I'm able to let people join???? Idk
There's a big discord server with everyone (or mostly everyone, idk if a few people may or may not be in it since some people may not be a fan of discord servers)
I can send you a link for it if you want? I'll probably do that in the morning tho cuz I'm getting ready to go to bed rn
Plus I also wanna let everyone know you may be joining (cuz again- idk if I'm able to let people join 😅)
#sol full of asks#plus I haven't really been active on that discord server in a while so idk what's really happening on there#but again- WOULD FRICKIN LOVE IF YOU JOINED :D#just don't know if I'm actually able to invite people to join :P#and now I feel like I'm just repeating myself a bunch anfjsjgksjgksjg#okay good night y'all!! going to bed now
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There's so much I want to write and so much I want to read, but I can't fully engage with much of anything right now and it's killing me😭
#so many fic ideas! i thought about a zuri x farah one with zuri doing her hair#and them talking about their experiences regarding their hair and how its perceived#i wrote my general thoughts down on it and it would be !!!#so interesting!!#(especially since things concerning race aren't really... there in game ig - and idk if i want it to be for a variety of reasons)#(but exploring it with them could be !!!!!!!)#i thought of a mini series of zuri and adam going on drives together as their relationship progresses#i also wanna write something with zuri and bobby after the events of book 3#with bobby seeking her out with more genuine intentions than he does in book 2 and contrasting the two#i wanna write a few scene rewrites just for just#and there are so many fics i wanna read! i've missed so many of them and they all seem so interesting and fun#but i am suffering💀#i'm in a different country for an extended period of time (for me at least) when i really didn't want to be#(travelling in general isn't really for me - not when my parents 'plan' it)#i'm struggling to sleep because it's not my bed and i am constantly aware that its not my bed#all my energy is going into being as okay as i can be while counting the days until i can go home#(and i know as soon as i'm on the plane i'm gonna feel like this wasn't so bad so i dislike that it still mostly feels like it is)#and i forgot to take the pill for days now so my period just started for the second time this month💀💀#make it stop PLEASE#this ended up being a more personal rant but like UAUSGSH#i just need it to be over#chichi.txt
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