#okay gonna go back to my book fandom now bai/hj

[supernaturalist1234]

so I’ve seen discussions about the new Sanders Sides updates. and, since I am physically unable to keep thoughts to myself, I’m going to make a post about it.

half the fandom has been really excited, and the other half has been skeptical, and almost afraid. with a varying range between of course. because all these promises have been made before. and it’s been a year with little more than silly updates, some short side content. most of which has been on patreon.

what’s been mentioned a few times in posts I’ll bring here too, is that this year has sucked. I certainly haven’t created much of the content I wanted to. keeping up a sizeable fandom and making regular content would destroy me, no questions asked.

Thomas has been dealing with a lot, and that’s just what we’re aware. I’ve seen some people say “he owes an explanation”, or at least to stop promising, and to that I can say I 100% disagree. content creators are called content creators instead of “businesses” or “shows” or even “influencers” (though some also fall under that umbrella) or anything like that for a reason. we don’t know what’s going on. if there even is anything going on. and that is fine. he deserves that space.

and I think if it were just this year, people might be a bit more lenient, the way I am phrasing it. or at least feel better about staying in a fandom that may very well be dying. but it’s not. there have been plenty of content droughts since the start. this fandom lives almost purely on fanon content, and that is a fact. anyone who says that no one would work if we didn’t pay them has clearly never been in fandom before. and that’s part of why it’s so hard.

anytime I think about the time Thomas takes to make content, to take breaks, I have a thought at the back of my reminding me that I haven’t. and neither have most others. when the new episode came out I drew Sanders Sides fanart almost everyday single day for a week straight. I have made designs and comics and even animations and animatics almost consistently from Nov-July. I took palette requests for free and gave completely finished pieces for it. have I been great the whole time? no, of course not. but I’m not getting paid. not even as a fan content creator. and there are so. many. others. who do twice as much as I do. and i’m exhausted.

and having content dangled like this constantly, having promises made and broken, having a lot of the content we do have put behind a pay wall. it makes you want to quit. and, to avoid sounding like a therapist, it’s important to have space for that too.

but it’s also not really fair. from my point of view. I’m here because I love it. because my thoughts were nothing but the sides and all that can be done with that world. and Thomas might… not. that’s not to say he doesn’t love the content! or Sanders Sides or doing youtube or anything like that. but I’m saying that even when I am absolutely in love with a project, even when it consumed all the rent free brain space it could, even some it couldn’t… I get bored. and I have felt that if I posted a different project, that if I worked on something else, that if I didn’t dedicate everything to this project. then I was betraying someone. myself, namely. some of the followers who like that content. and this has included TS works. forcing myself to work on it goes to burn-out.

maybe it’s also unfair to discuss myself in the context of Thomas. I’m a different person, I’m doing this for free, I haven’t been making content for that long, certainly not original content. I don’t have a fandom waiting on this content. not mine specifically, anyways.

if Thomas chose to move all his projects entirely to patreon, I would be disappointed. I would be sad, because then I really would move on from this fandom. he won’t, of course, but if he did I don’t think I would blame him either. because choosing so you get consistently payed for all of your work, on a regular basis, and having one-on-sort-of-one interactions with fans that you can stress about less, that sounds fantastic.

maybe it’s because I’ve already moved on, in a sense. not fully, of course. but I exist within a space where I will be happy to make content, when I have time again. but I also have other things to do in my life. other fandoms, other things to move on to. that’s pretty rare, in these circumstances.

so, final thoughts? it’s nuanced. Thomas deserves this space, we deserve that space. content is promised, content is deserved. support is asked for, support is. not necessarily deserved. that’s freely given. content possibly unpaid for, not deserved. explanations beyond what’s given, deserved if only in the context of promises broken.

I’m not leaving Sanders Sides fandom quite yet. I might make a little sketch once a year, might like and reblog old content constantly, might write little one-shots every few months. but I’ll still be here. even if I’m also elsewhere. and I can make that promise, because I know not many will be disappointed if I can’t hold to it. if any.