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anime-grimmy · 5 years ago

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Little Witch Academia and missed opportunities

Sooo, since I seem to go on a tangent every few months, have another one.

I recently watched the series Little Witch Academia. Now, I did see the original OVA and movie, but that was a few years back, so except for the concept and rough understanding of the characters I went into this show kinda blind. Also, knowing that the series started its own story and changed up a few things got me really interested.

I watched the series and you know what, it was real fun. Great animation and quirky characters, as expected of Trigger. What I didn’t expect was that I got really interested in the story as well. From what I knew about LWA (so, it’s memes) I thought it was mostly an episodic anime, which it was in its first half, but they still carried on the aspects of those single episodes.

However.

The biggest problems I have with the show lie with its characters and the missed opportunities. I do like (most) of the characters, but sometimes it felt like Trigger originally had more planned with them or they just outright shanked them. That is why I’m gonna ramble for a while, go over each character (I care about) and talk about what I like about them but was just not explored enough. Do remember, however, that I still really enjoyed the show and I am considering rewatching it again right away, but these were just some points that got on my nerves while watching.

Well, strap in I guess

(Spoiler warning btw)

Akko

Let’s start with the protagonist, shall we? I’m probably going to mention her a lot with the other characters as well, but first I want to look at her by herself.

Akko is Trigger’s typical high energy character with just a bit of sass. What I like about her is that she is loud, obnoxious, selfish and annoying and the other characters think that too. I normally really don’t enjoy these kinds of characters, even more so when I binge a series, because they get so exhausting. What I like in LWA is that even Akko’s close friends often tell her to calm down or straight up to just shut up. Akko’s character is even more enjoyable because of her great VA (actually the reason I finally picked up the anime). Her animations and reactions are super enjoyable too and tbh, even if she is annoying, she is also the funniest part of the whole show.

But, I’m here to rant, so on to the things that bothered me. Like I said, she is annoying. I can kind of see that it’s not that big of a deal on a weekly basis, maybe then it’s even uplifting. But when you sit through episode after episode it gets exhausting.

What bothers me too is that Akko barely changes. I know not to expect that much subtle character progression from Trigger, since they go from 0 to 100 fast, but it’s even stated in the show. Like the whole thing with patience. Akko was never the patient type but the episode it became the focus, they turned it up to eleven. She became unbearably twitchy and whiny, which was basically your indicator that this was going to be focused on. But after the whole lesson of the ep, in the next one Ursula even says ‘didn’t you just learn to be patient?’. I don’t wish for Akko to take big steps after she gets a lesson, but just show subtle moments where the lesson takes effect. I think it only really bothers me so much because after the ep Akko seems even more impatient.

Another thing is her selfishness / self-righteousness. Diana and Andrew even tell that to her face, that she just shoves her believes in other’s faces without considering how they feel and what their situation is. But she never, even once, doesn’t do it. I get it, it’s her character trait, being the dangerous combo of head-strong and stubborn. But it never, not even once, brings consequences. I thought it would finally happen with the whole Diana situation, because Andrew even points out Akko’s faults, but it all ends well anyways and Akko doesn’t learn at all from this.

I know this is a Trigger protagonist but at some point it just got so frustrating. It’s even sadder when you see what they did with Ryuko in Kill la Kill. Yeah, she’s still her abrasive self in the end, but she does have a more gentle and open side to her too after the show. Akko kind of stays the complete same after the whole show, only that she can do magic better and finally fly (which was honestly a cute ending, ngl). The worst parts, however, were her sad moments towards the end. And I’m not talking about her reaction to learning about Chariot, that was totally ok (though I do have some things to complaint about, but on to that later), but the thing before when she climbed that never-ending tree. Her outburst and her frustration came kind of out of nowhere, at least continuing on from the last episode. Her reasons for being so frustrated and angry make perfect sense, but the build-up is just missing, even in the episode itself. It would have been enough to make Akko look desperately at her Chariot poster a few times or just look really desperate in general after being told ‘no’ by Ursula. But she just looks her usual pouty self when that happens, so her outburst and mistrust in Ursula are very surprising. I do like that that ep is right before the Chariot (betrayal) reveal, because they just made up and got closer, but the episode itself felt so out of left field, it really bothered me.

Sucy and Lotte

Before you say anything, I’m only lumping them together because what bothers me is not their characters by themselves, they’re great and very enjoyable, but how Trigger fucking dropped them halfway through the show.

Sucy and Lotte seem very similar to their OVA and movie selves, though Sucy seems just a tad bit less evil and Lotte not that much of a typical nerd. In general, I really liked those two and their friendship with Akko.

That said.

I find it terrible how little focus they get in the second half of the show. I mean, it’s great they are those kind of friends that don’t necessarily have to hang around the MC all the time, like in the Diana-centric episode where they go ‘We know you want to go after her, so here, have your stuff and go. We’re going to support you but not take part in it’. Things like that are great! But Akko, Sucy and Lotte are supposed to be best friends, the main trio, Sucy and Lotte are supposed to be Akko’s mayor pillars of support. And this is beautifully shown in the earlier episodes, but later in the show it just feels like those two lose significance. What pissed me off the most is that in the second OP you see them grasping each other’s arms, a reference to the tapestry about the 7 lights. But in the end, Akko unlocks the staff and the big magic source by herself. I wished they’d gone more for a ‘Luna Lana’ equivalent. That’s just another thing! I watched the OVA and movie yesterday and their friendship is so much better in those! You see them laugh and fight and stick together, it’s so nice. You don’t get a cool moment like ‘Luna Lana’ in the series and I think they really should have. And no, the missile chase doesn’t count, that involved all girls.

Ultimately, I just think it’s sad that those 3 are supposed to represent this close friendship but the later show doesn’t show it at all. I wished other character-centric episodes, like with Constanze or Diana for example, would have happened sooner so that later episodes could push Akko, Sucy and Lotte’s friendship a bit more.

Speaking of Diana, oh boy, here we go.

Diana and Andrew

Yes, I’m lumping them together because both could have had so much more.

First, Diana. I was actually surprised about her character, because from the little I remember about the OVA and movie, I thought her to be more of a bitch. And I was right. In the first two instalments she is a snobbish, stuck-up, rude bitch, so a Tsundere, but fun in her own rights. Her dynamic with Akko is truly amusing. In the series, however, she is still a bit stuck up, but more just a determined, stern and smart rich girl. She does chastise Akko and is shown as a know-it-all, but she respects others way more and mostly just talks because she knows she’s right. Though, I wish she would have turned out to be something right between the two.

Diana is supposed to be Akko’s rival, so why isn’t she? She’s supposed to be the Viral to Kamina/Simon, the Satsuki to Ryuko, but she just isn’t. Before her little arc, she’s kind of that ‘big goal’, the ‘perfect witch’, so the familiar obstacle that is the rival. Diana even gains some respect for Akko but also gets disappointed in her shortly after (tbh, same). But all this progression is kind of one-sided, because Akko’s perception of Diana barely changes. They don’t really have a dynamic going on in the first half, more so their own development. Heck, in the second OP it’s shown that they’re supposed to mirror Chariot and Croix but they honestly don’t. Because Chariot and Croix were two friends that were striving for the same goal but due to how differently they tried to reach it, they grew apart. Diana is striving for the same power that Chariot and Croix did and Akko, well, she doesn’t, she just goes along because she wants to meet Chariot. Which is fine, but it feels like this ‘rivalry’ is being forced onto them. Maybe that’s also intentional, but it feels weird. Diana even once says ‘I never considered us rivals’, which is understandable, but to me it was more of a surprise that Akko saw her as one. To me, it always felt like, even if Diana didn’t realize it, she viewed Akko as her own goal to reach. Akko on the other hand just gets really miffed with Diana, and yeah, she strives to be as good with magic as her, but there’s no real rivalry, not even an implied one.

Then the whole thing with both being Chariot fans and Diana getting Akko out of her slump. I already said it once, but I still think it should have been Lotte and Sucy who ultimately got her to perk up again (I’ll describe how I think this whole thing should have gone. Again, this is only cos I was unsatisfied with the resolution, the original is fine in itself though). What bothers me so much about this is that it feels like they shoe-horned this whole thing in because that’s how it was in the original. I get what they want to do, get a parallel between Akko and Diana, even more so because they both lost their magic to Chariot, and since they’re closer now than at the beginning Diana manages to reach her. But in the end, it feels forced. Both girls had one adventure together and Diana was just starting to open up to Akko, where the hell did all that understanding come from. It’s even harder to believe because it’s shown that Diana is good at relaying facts and choosing the most logical course of action, she’s not known to just openly share her feelings, more so to someone she just learned to consider a friend. And it also feels kind of lazy that a pep talk from a fellow fan and victim would just push Akko out of her slump. Instead of somehow cramming that fact in and making Diana have lost her power too, they could have gone along the route of ‘so what if she stole your magic, you’re too stubborn to let that stop you!’

Like I said, I’ll go into detail about this scene later, but first.

Andrew.

Oh. My sweet boy, they did you so dirty.

I’m going to say it right now, I love Andrew’s introduction episode, it’s probably one of my favourites. And I also like his addition to the series in general, because whereas Diana is Akko’s feud in personality and ability, Andrew is supposed to be her opposite in ideologies. But he isn’t just a male Diana who doesn’t like magic, though at first they make you think that.

I love his introduction ep so much, because they don’t just introduce an obstacle for Akko, but once again show that the show can play with your expectations. Andrew is first shown as this typical snobby, stuck up rich kid, which he is, but even when faced with someone he disagrees with, he shows a level of respect. Then further in the episode, you see that he is in fact a calm, helpful when a bit teasing individual. It also shows that he actually has fun when in danger, which is a nice change to normally one-note characters. But what I love most about this is, that he is not just this ‘snobby non-believer turned enthusiast through one outing’ cliché. Andrew gets to have a bit of an adventure with Akko and get to see amazing magic at that, but he stays pessimistic. He doesn’t just change his world view in a second, because that’s not what he was raised to do.

Having established all that, every time he shows up, he kind of matters less and less. The whole party episode was fun and all, but with Akko still being stuck in her narcissistic world view, the effect of the ep is small. Because what it really is about, is to show on one hand that Andrew is very subordinate to his father and that his perception of magic isn’t necessarily his own opinion, so there is a possibility to change his mind. On the other hand, it’s to show Akko that some people make decisions not based on their own volition and sometimes their opinion can’t just be changed like that.

But in the end Akko doesn’t learn her lesson and even if they do play a bit with changing Andrew’s mind, there really isn’t much to it. When I heard that originally it was planned for Akko and Andrew to be together at the end, but they scrapped that idea, it made so much sense why Andrew felt so out of place in the last few episode. Because he was. Honestly, it really shows now how they weren’t so sure what to do with him at the end, because he was not supposed to be the one to make that big of an impact, neither on Akko nor on the plot as a whole. He does say something very significant to Akko though, to be her own witch and not try to be Chariot, but that gets kind of brushed under the rug, because again, he isn’t supposed to be the one to make an impact anymore. Same thing with his ‘I believe’. It’s just there to be there, because even if he opened up more to magic and Akko herself, I don’t think he would have been snapped out of his ideology that he got punched into him since he was young and just abandon his father’s decision he had just started to doubt.

I think all of this would have flown better if the whole Diana arc would have been earlier in the series. There would have been more time for Diana and Akko to find a common footing and become believable friends, Andrew would have more reason to be mesmerized by witches and magic, because he didn’t just get to see determination from Akko but from Diana as well (and you kinda have that ‘go against your family’ stuff too) and then, in the later part of the series, there would have been more time for the main trio to develop a bit more.

But even if that hadn’t happened, I just want to get to changing up the scenes after Chariot’s reveal, because I think if they had handled all that a bit better, then the original ending would have felt even more sincere.

Cheering up depressed Akko

Like I said, I find Trigger’s solution to this small arc lazy. Because you start up with Andrew and Akko meeting up to give her hat back, Andrew says stuff that not only gets Akko thinking but himself as well. Then you got the reveal, everybody searching and Diana being the only person needed to cheer her up. I know it can be argued that, only after Lotte comes in crying with the others in tow, Akko cheers up, but I think most of it can be chalked up to Diana, which is such plot convenience. Again, the things that bother me are the whole ‘Chariot fan and victim’ thing and how Lotte, Sucy, Andrew and the others are not really significant in this moment. The biggest thing that bothers me is that they start this mini arc with Andrew telling Akko to be herself and reach her goal with her own strengths in mind, not because she is chasing someone else. But then with Diana, it’s basically a ‘I could do it, so you can do it too’. I know they’re trying to build a parallel between those two and show how Diana opens up to Akko, but I think that just misses the point of what they had sat up.

Before I get to describing my idea, again, you can totally disagree with me, heck, you don’t have to like what I come up with at all. But just know that this is supposed to be a rant and I purposefully highlight the things that bothered me. I still love the show and only rant about it because I know Trigger could have made this already fun show even better.

Anyways, here is how I’d handled this arc:

The start of the arc is still the same. Akko and Andrew meet up, he tells her to believe in her own strength, Akko gets distracted and runs off, Andrew gets thoughtful. You have the whole reveal with Chariot, Akko vanishes and Diana and the others go search for her.

Now, what I want this arc to accomplish is, that Akko learns to believe in her own strengths but also to show how her friends have her back. Because that’s what the whole ending is about, right? Showing how Akko changed people, how they believe in themselves and even more so, believe in her. So, I want all of her friends to play a part in cheering her up, but make Sucy and Lotte the biggest influence of them all.

I’d start the changes from where Diana is nearly at Akko’s location. This time however, she finds Andrew close by. After the whole Parliament meeting stuff, him and his father are still in town and he went out at night, wandering around, deep in thought. He somehow managed to make himself think about his own situation with all that he had told Akko.

Diana, knowing that Andrew had met up with Akko, approaches him and asks if he had seen Akko. Since he is confused and worried after hearing she’s gone, Diana explains the situation and Andrew decides to help them search.

He is also the one that finds Akko first, right on that bench, covered in snow. (this part is a bit inspired by a post I read). He runs over to her, shocked at how cold and unresponsive she is. He gives her his jacket and he brushes the snow from he hair. He sits quietly next to her, worried glances and all. He thinks about what Diana told him and mulls over an answer. In the end, he basically repeats to her what he told her earlier that day and maybe something along the lines ‘and honestly, I wouldn’t believe you don’t have magic, because to me you are truly bewitching’, just so that you have nod back to the party, only now it comes from the heart and not because of a potion. That gets her to perk up and Andrew just gives her a reassuring smile.

Then Diana comes in, finally finding the two. Diana takes Akko to the café, Andrew staying behind. (here Akko could keep his jacket, so that in the end you have the parallel of him bringing her the hat and her returning the jacket). The café scene is kind of similar to the original, but I’d change the reason for Diana’s loss of magic. Instead of her losing her magic abilities all of a sudden, maybe she could have had a tough time manifesting them from the start. But Diana shares with Akko that she was inspired by Chariot too and that kept her going, believing in herself and her magic and finally succeeding. She tells Akko the whole thing with how she got envious of her, but at the same time that, just like Chariot, Akko had kind of become an inspiration as well. Now you don’t have the ‘I could, so you can too.’ but more Diana cementing that Akko has powers of her own and is already influencing people.

Then in come Amanda, Jasminka and Constanze. Amanda goes straight to shaking Akko and ruffling her hair, shouting something about ‘who am I gonna cause trouble with if you go’. Jasminka offers Akko her candies and Constanze shoves plans in her face, trying to show her that she needs her assistant. It’s just small things, but it would allude to the three of them caring about Akko and in Amanda’s and Constanze’s cases, that she had made an impact on them, tying in previous episodes.

Lastly come in Lotte and Sucy. Lotte is still crying and asking her if she was leaving. But they would kind of go into more detail, like a small recap of all that happened and how important she was. They would also talk about how Akko has grown so much already and so what if Chariot had taken her magic, she still inspired Akko and Akko therefore grew into her own witch that now inspires people.

After that, Akko finally snaps out of it totally, maybe grinning full force before sobbing and burying herself in Lotte and Sucy’s arms.

I think in general with a recap of the show so far and showing Akko’s journey, it would be a good set-up for the end. You got Akko back on her feet, her faith rebuilt but also her believe in herself strengthened. You got the bond between the characters established which makes the chase after the missile more impactful and you actually got more reason for Andrew to cement his own believes more. (maybe have him walk in the café too, just so he sees how many people Akko has inspired but also how much people can believe in magic)

But like I said many times already, this is just my take on what could have been handled better a bit. I still really love the show and its characters. I don’t necessarily want a whole new season, since they did wrap up many things already, but I’d love a movie or some OVAs to explore some characters more in depth.

Speaking of which, I’m just going to drop this here at the end, because I do want to talk about it but not that in depth. The thing about Ursula/Chariot and Croix. I kind of enjoyed the OVA-Ursula more, because she was kind of spunky and you could tell that she believed in her own strength. Series-Ursula is a freaking Jedi, but she is just so meek and nervous, and that even as Chariot, which I didn’t really like. Croix is an interesting character and I love me my evil scientists, but she turned generic antagonist at the end. As expected, tbh. The only thing about Croix I want to highlight is that I believed so hard that she and Andrew were somehow linked or related. Because when you binge the series, Croix shows up shortly after Andrew’s introduction. And in a series with so many unique eyes, they have the fucking same. I just thought that Trigger was hinting at something, because not only do they have a very similar shape and the exact same string green colour, the first few episodes with them heavily focus the camera on their eyes. Especially with Croix! It felt like the anime told me ‘look, look close at those eyes, seem familiar, right?’. I waited so long for something to happen but it never did, what a shame. Though, maybe they did have something planned but just like the initial ending, they scrapped that idea but left the designs untouched.

Anyways, I’ve been ranting for over 4000 words now, I think that should be enough for one little analysis. If you have your own thoughts, feel free to share them with me!

#little witch academia #rant #review?#akko kagari #sucy manbavaran #lotte jansson #diana cavendish #andrew hanbridge #amanda o'neill #jasminka antonenko #constanze amalie von braunschbank albrechtsberger #ursual #chari #croix

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scoutception · 5 years ago

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Ranking the next 5 animes I’ve recently watched

After many distractions on my part, including playing through Steins;Gate, something that has quickly become something I adore like few others, I’ve continued my descent into the world of anime with 5 more series. The stuff I watched was a lot shorter on average than last time, and my attempts to be “objective” and my personal biases align much more closely compared to last time. With that, I’ll begin. 5. Soni-Ani: Super Sonico the Animation

Number of episodes: 12. Language options: subs only. Streaming availability: Crunchyroll. When it comes to visual novels, nitro+ is one of the biggest developers out there, alongside Key. Whereas Key is mainly out to make you really, really sad, nitro+ prefers a different approach. To my understanding, at best, their works are really, really dark, and at worst, they’re going straight for your nightmares, with stuff like Song of Saya and Sweet Pool. So clearly, the best mascot for them is the pink haired, constantly headphoned, and downright adorable Super Sonico. Even if it’s not outright official, it’s pretty jarring. Anyway, with that little rant out of the way, here’s the only thing on this list I actually wouldn’t recommend. Produced by White Fox back in 2014, this anime apparently got slammed pretty hard, and honestly, I have no idea why I even ended up watching this one. Perhaps this’ll be a reminder to be less impulsive in my choices in the future. Soni-Ani focuses on, who else, Super Sonico herself, an energetic and kind, yet clumsy college student who should reasonably be dead from stress and exhaustion. Along with college, she’s an idol, gravure model, helper at her grandmother’s restaurant and guitarist and main singer in the band First Astronomical Velocity with her friends Suzu Fujimi, the witty and manipulative bassist and official leader of the band, and Fuuri Watanuki, the mysterious drummer single mindedly obsessed with food. The series just explores some of the odd, extremely fanservice filled days of her life. It’s ok idea on paper, but in practice it’s just not really anything special or even entertaining for the most part. While I can usually ignore fanservice, it’s downright distractingly prevalent in the earlier episodes, to the point of several episode premises pretty much only catering themselves to it. Even without that, there’s just not much to be found; aside from Suzu and Sonico’s manager, the honestly hilarious Kitamura, who constantly wears a hannya mask and is willing to attack people for attempting to take advantage of Sonico, the characters aren’t anything memorable or entertaining on their own, leaving a lot of episodes feeling dry. They do improve in the second half, featuring episodes like a fairly charming murder mystery spoof, and an episode focusing on Sonico’s cats, of all things, but they’re still not something going out of your way to watch. The voice acting and animation, while at least ok, don’t stick out much either. Overall, again, this is the one thing I’d say to just avoid. There’s tons of other slice of life animes out there that are way better. If nothing else, though, I’m kinda glad I stuck to it just for the surprise cameo by Kurisu Makise’s outfit, considering I was already playing Steins;Gate.

4. Monthly Girls’ Nozaki-kun

Number of episodes: 12. Language options: dub (video release only, apparently) and subs available. Streaming availability: Crunchyroll, Hulu, Netflix. Moving onto stuff I’d actually recommend, here’s a nice little anime adaptation of a gag manga by Izumi Tsubaki, produced by Dogakobo. Chiyo Sakura, a high school student who stands at an impressive 4′9″, confesses her love to the tall and mysterious Umetaro Nozaki, and gets his autograph, of all things, for her troubles. Trying again, Nozaki instead takes her to his apartment... to assist him with his manga. As it turns out, Nozaki is a popular romance manga author, whose interests in life start an end at manga, rendering him utterly oblivious to Chiyo’s feelings. Thusly, Chiyo officially becomes his assistant in order to grow closer to her crush, meeting his other associates along the way. The main thing that must be said is that this is not a serious anime in the slightest, and it’s all just big parody of romance manga more than anything, especially with the characters, like Mikoshiba, who acts like a playboy, but in reality is cripplingly shy, and Kashima, the “prince” of the school who is both actually a girl and an airhead who’s frequently on the nerves of the drama club’s president, Hori. A lot of the humor thrives on miscommunication, and it’s exaggerated enough that it works well. Every character is an idiot, in their own ways, but endearingly so, and each of them stands out, from Chiyo, who mostly plays the straight man but has her moments of over imagination, or the hilariously abrasive Seo. The plots are the right kind of dumb too, like Nozaki and Mikoshiba becoming obsessed over a helper NPC in a dating sim, or Hori gaining an intense hatred for people standing on boxes due to Nozaki’s attempts to fix perspective problems. The jokes can get a bit predictable after a while, especially with Nozaki, but overall it’s a pretty funny time. The voice acting is good, and the animation is charming. Overall, this is definitely a fun watch. If you want a good laugh, or just something that doesn’t take itself too seriously, this is definitely something to check out. 3. Angel Beats!

Number of episodes: 13 (+ some OVAs not on streaming services). Language options: dub and subs available. Streaming availability: Netflix, Crunchyroll, Funimation. As it turned out, visual novels, or at least visual novel developers, became a theme in the things I watched this time around. As mentioned before, Key is one of the biggest VN developers out there, who specialize in making you really sad. From Kanon, to Clannad, to Planetarian, to Little Busters, Key’s made a lot of great stuff, and had some great anime adaptations made, particularly for Kanon and Clannad. Thus, Jun Maeda, co-founder of Key, conceived Angel Beats to originate as an anime, produced by P.A. Works in 2010. Angel Beats focuses on Otonashi, a teenager who wakes up in a strange high school with amnesia, only able to remember his last name. He soon meets a girl named Yuri Nakamura, who informs him that they’re dead, and stuck in a sort of afterlife, seemingly ruled over by a mysterious girl they only know as Angel. In this purgatory, they’re unable to die, as Otonashi finds out first hand at Angel’s hands, and the school is populated by fabricated teachers and students, but the real people stuck there are at risk of being “obliterated” if they act like normal students, ceasing to exist. Unwilling to accept this, Yuri leads class SSS in opposition of Angel and the assumed God that created this world for the cruel fates that everyone stuck in the afterlife met, Otonashi seemingly included. With seemingly no other path to take, Otonashi joins forces with the SSS. The main strength of Angel Beats is its cast of characters. From the pretty mean yet charming Yuri, to the reliable, yet often abused Hinata, to the crazy and energetic Yui, to even some of the side characters, like Shiina, the ninja girl with a crippling weakness for wind up dog toys, or TK, who speaks in gloriously mangled English and dances constantly. The premise as well is honestly fascinating to me, and makes for some very interesting episodes. It’s got some pretty entertaining action scenes, along with some really funny moments, mostly by playing the “nobody can actually die” tidbit for all its worth, with the second episode devoting a good amount of time to slowly killing off the main group in horrible, yet blase fashions. It delivers emotionally too, with the second half in particular having a good deal of touching episodes, especially episode 10. Unfortunately, there’s one giant problem with this anime that brings it down quite a bit: it’s only 13 episodes long. While I’m not a fan of 12 or 13 episode seasons, I can’t say that’s a problem by itself. What is a problem is that they were planning to have double that amount of episodes, causing the storyline to feel very rushed, and leaving nearly every character in the cast that isn’t part of the main group very underdeveloped. While there’s an entire expanded universe of stuff, good luck tracking it all down, and while Key themselves were making a 6 part visual novel of Angel Beats to expand upon it all, something that’s very promising, only the first volume has been released so far, back in 2015, with no word since, very likely because of Jun Maeda’s health issues. Overall, Angel Beats genuinely is a good watch, but it’s kinda depressing, just because of how much potential was cut short thanks to whatever genius decided to cut the episode amount in half. Unless the VN project really gets going again, it’ll probably just remain a bunch of what could have beens. 2. Puella Magi Madoka Magica

Number of episodes: 12. Language options: dub and subs available. Streaming availability: Netflix, Hulu, Crunchyroll, Funimation. Continuing the theme I unintentionally set up, here’s this famous little thing, from the mind of Gen Urobuchi, who, among other things, has worked on several nitro+ visual novels, mostly notably Song of Saya, wrote the apparently horribly depressing Fate/Zero, and was a scriptwriter for Kamen Rider Gaim, which, to my understanding, is one of the darkest Kamen Rider shows out there. Will all this in mind, there’s no real hiding that this isn’t going to be anywhere near as innocent as it tries to appear. Even if you didn’t know that, its reputation probably far exceeds it by now. Madoka Kaname is an average middle school student whose life is thrown into chaos when a mysterious girl named Homura Akemi transfers into her class, whom Madoka later finds attacking a strange creature called Kyubey. After rescuing it, Madoka and her best friend Sayaka are attacked by a strange creature known as a witch, only to be rescued by Mami Tomoe, a “magical girl” given power by Kyubey. Kyubey sees much potential in Madoka, and offers to grant her any wish of her choosing, in exchange for her becoming a magical girl as well and helping fight the witches. Homura, however, is completely determined to keep that from happening. Thus starts a chain of event in the lives of Madoka and Sayaka that, suffice it to say, don’t go very well. Without getting too specific, what starts as a mostly typical, if slightly odd, magical girl show quickly goes to very dark and twisted places, comparative to Neon Genesis Evangelion, though not quite as in depthly depressing with it. Everyone takes a beating in some way, and even with just 12 episodes, it can get a bit much for some people, even when it doesn’t end quite as awfully as you might expect. Still, it’s actually very well done. The characters are complex and flawed, but ultimately sympathetic, the overall plot is fascinating, and it ends in a very fitting way. It’s emotional, and has surprisingly good action. The dub voice work is solid, and the animation by Studio Shaft is as well, especially helped by the abstract designs of the witches themselves. While I’m not quite as passionate about it all as some are, it’s definitely earned its reputation. It’s a great watch, and definitely a big recommendation. 1. Steins;Gate

Number of episodes: 24 (+ 1 OVA). Language options: dub and subs available. Streaming availability: Funimation, Hulu, Crunchyroll. Finishing off my unintentional theme with an actual adaptation of a visual novel, there was no way I wasn’t checking this one out with how utterly passionate the VN made me. This is at least partially a bias placement, but this anime is a very, very good adaptation, and a great way to experience the story without the VN, and a great watch even having gone through it. Rintaro Okabe is a college student on break living in his “laboratory” in Akihabara. A self proclaimed mad scientist, he whittles his days away hanging out with his friends Mayuri Shiina and Itaru Hashida, inventing useless gadgets in a supposed fight against an evil organization. One day, Rintaro and Mayuri go to attend a press conference by Doctor Nakabachi in Radi-Kan, who claims to have invented a time machine, only for it to end horribly for all involved when Rintaro discovers Kurisu Makise, a young neuroscientist who had recently had her thesis published in a major science magazine, murdered by an unknown assailant. Sending an email to Itaru about the incident, Rintaro suddenly finds the world to have changed. According to everyone else, the press conference had been canceled due to a mysterious satellite that crashed into Radi-Kan, and Rintaro later runs into Kurisu, alive and well. Investigating, Rintaro finds that, by complete accident, his modified microwave has become a device capable of sending emails to the past- and that SERN, a French research organization, has been conducting time travel experiments of their own. In his attempts to understand the capabilities of what he’s invented, and his curiosity as to why his memories appear to be out of sync with everyone else’s, Rintaro rushes into a series of experiments that change his life, and those of friends old and new. This is something I could rant about all day, but putting it as succinctly as I can, I’ve never been as fascinated by time travel as Steins;Gate has made me. As fantastic as it, it’s also shown to be unpredictable, limited, and downright unsettling, especially when nobody knows just how time even works. It’s a story about the concept of time travel as much as a story about using it. The story definitely starts a bit slowly, but it’s well worth pushing past. As an adaptation, it doesn’t even need to sacrifice much, with the most that’s lost being some details in a few later arcs that aren’t worth much in the long run anyway. Beyond that, the main strength of the story is the cast of characters. Rintaro, with his rather severe case of chuunibyou, is a unique protagonist to begin with, but the events of the story turn him into an honestly fascinating and downright tragic character, and easily one of my favorite protagonists in a long time. The rest of the cast is just as good, with Kurisu being a great mix of intelligence, ravenous curiosity, and flusterability, with her and Rintaro’s interactions always being entertaining. As well, there’s the always kind, yet ditzy Mayuri, the outgoing, but odd Suzuha Amane, the endearingly gentle Luka Urushibara, and the energetic and wily Faris, just for some examples. The cast is downright loveable and very easy to get attached to. While I prefer the Japanese voice cast overall, the dub isn’t to be overlooked, with Trina Nishimura as Kurisu, Tyson Rinehart as Itaru, Cherami Leigh as Suzuha, Lindsay Seidel as Luka, and especially J. Michael Tatum as Rintaro giving great performances. Visually, White Fox did a great job giving it a distinct look. While the VN had a gorgeous and unique artstyle, it’s not really something that can be translated into animation. Instead, they used a whole lot of washed out colors and saturated lights that, combined with the sparse use of flashy effects and even music, gives a very subtle atmosphere to it all. Even beyond the style, it looks very good on its own, and it’s especially nice not having Rintaro look like a ghoul half the time, like he does in the VN.

Overall, this is very much something worth checking out. I’m beating a dead horse here since Steins;Gate is already wildly popular, but it’s that way for a very good reason. There’s also an extra OVA episode, along with a sequel movie, though both are only available via Funimation. They aren’t quite the best, but they make for entertaining watches worth checking out. And with that, that’s the end to my rambling. With the exception of, again, Super Sonico, everything here is very much worth a watch. I’m sure, once I emerge from the hell of Steins;Gate spinoffs, I’ll get to watching even more stuff. Till then, though. -Scout

#anime #steins;gate #monthly girls' nozaki kun #angel beats #puella magi madoka magica

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noidsome · 7 years ago

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The big issue with the digimon tri movies, and why you should be pissed too.

I just finished watching the 5th digimon movie, and to put it short, i excpected nothing and im still let down. This is a big negative critique on what ive seen so far from the tri movies, but its also more of a vent for me, because theres something about these movies that really fucking grinds my gears and i feel i finally need to let that out somewhere. Look at this as a sort of....badly written analyctic rant. So far this movie, in short, was as i dreaded, 70% meiko bullshit and 20% kari...which is so fucking insulting i dont even know...but thats why im here.

Now before you assblast me with your stupid crap, please try to understand that as harsh as im writing this, im trying to look at this movie from a critical standpoint, and no im not going to put in the effort to be “nice” about it because if digimon tri can get away with half assing everything about itself, then wont bother. If you cant handle that, move on. If your interested, click the read more and we can begin this shit fest, because i think its about god damn time someone put these mediocre movies in their place.

The pacing.

I dont know about you guys, but to me it feels like these movies, or episodes, are either dragging on forever, or they rush really fast. This movie especially took its sweet ass time to give us 2 whole half an hour scenes of meiko being depressed about her shitty OC digimon, to leave the actual interesting fights and plot to 1 and a half episode, out of 4. Im sorry but i feel like ive been following this fucking story for 6 years, its so fucking slow and it drags on for fucking ever sometimes.

I do understand that its important to establish character interactions, and god damn does this fucking series need some, but sometimes it really stops the action dead in its tracks, and as much as i appriciate the movies giving each character some focus, it goes on for too long. the ending to movie 5 was....well rushed as shit.

But despite all this, its just really frustrating that half the entire series is just them standing around and TALKING...talking talking talking, exposition exposition exposition. It also feels really slow and stagnated sometimes, and the cheesy music in the background of the sad scenes dont really help much. And other times things are glossed over so fast that im standing there wondering if i missed out on something because i accedently blinked. Like how they entered the digital world, only to just suddently fall out of it immediatly after from a big digital gate just like that. Or how meiko just...SUDDENTLY appeared in the digital world with no warning or real reason. huh?? shes here now?? what?? meicoomon is still infected? what?? gennai is back with the dark masters? what where did they come from? why are they following him!? WHAT?? HUH??? HELLO???

im just….frustrated. im frustrated that i have to wait for 6+ months every a new movie comes out, only for the movie to stall for fucking ever and leave the actual OH SHIT moments to the last part, AND END ON A CLIFFHANGER. Its such fucking god damn bait to get us to watch the other movies, its almost INSULTING how incredibly obvious it is. Last movie ended with gennai fucking around and choking meiko. Then, as i saw my fat ass down in the chair, waiting for the big battle, no meicoo just...opened portals and then left with her copy paste army. Oh well so much for that.

Then the digidestined actually FALL OUT OF THE DIGITAL WORLD, and they are right back to standing around and getting chased by the cops...and then they spend THE REST OF THE EPISODES on meikos useless crying and baiting for meichi shipping material. im sorry but was that neccecary? was it neccecary to stop the entire god damn movie just so we could have tai standing there with spaghetti falling out of his pockets? and the mega evolutions for the other digimons felt really rushed too, i had hoped for more build up...but guess i get fuck alll.

The filler.

Now i do enjoy myself a little “filler” once in a while, i wont lie. and i will also not lie when i say that i really enjoyed seeing my boi tais hot nipple-less body. But, again…. DID WE NEED THE FIRST HALF BEING JUST THAT?! i swear to fucking god if you cut out all the filler content from these movies your going to get the entire series down to 5 episodes. Movie 2 was just...filler. fucking filler. i didnt have much issue with movie 3 but they just NEEDED to shove more meiko in..

movie 4 was kind of a bitch to sit trough because the whole damn “plot” made no sense. why was soras digimon the only one who was mad and while the others were just like before? why JUST her? why couldnt the others be like that too? Its just plot convenience at this point. and then it was pretty much just watching tai and matt spew spaghetti out of their pockets and be awkward because sora cant communicate with her friends like a normal person. Honestly it was a little charming at first but it got old pretty quickly…and then dark masters out of nowhere that died as fast as they came on. what a rushed little cameo for that extra nostalgia bait.

Honestly i found myself first liking the character interactions a little once the movies took a break from the action and fighting...but i much more often found myself angrily tapping my foot and going “REEEE MOVE ON.”

The god damn meiko.

Alright you all saw this one coming probably. Now let me just start by saying, i originally didnt mind meiko, or the idea of a new digitestined in the first place. Its welcoming to try and add something new to your otherwise soulless nostalgia cash grab. However we need to look at her from a critical stand point. im not trying to start a hate train, im just going to analyze her for how shes written as a character.

Im sorry to say this guys, but no matter how you look at her, shes a mary sue. Im sorry but all the tropes are there!! but why do i feel this way? heres why:

Her digimon is the sole reason for everything going to shit.

her digimon is in adult stage like gatomon just because.

essentially her digimon is “special”

all the other kids befriended her really fast just because.

everyone likes meiko and nobody seems to have a problem with her

shes the typical “uguu” shy type of girl.

her digimon OF COURSE won the costume contest in movie 2 or 3

leomon finds HER DIGIMON adorable enough to make the others run off... of course….

she cries constantly and does nothing but wine as the others hold her.

She takes up MAJORITY of the screentime for almost all movies. Almost.

POSSIBLY a relationship with the main character, if they actually are baiting us with those scenes in movie 5.

acts and feels like a self-insert OC in a canon universe.

The reason i dont like her is just because im SICK OF HER!! im sick of seeing her fucking face every god damn movie. im sick of the others shoving a friendship speech or talking about her belonging to them for the 700th GOD DAMN TIME, im sick of constantly hearing ME-MEI and MEIKOOOOOO, and im so fucking sick of seeing her sit down and cry or act sad and do NOTHING! shes just THERE TO BE THERE! her “cute little sneezing quirk” wasnt even something they bothered keeping any more. Shes so god damn obnoxious and shallow, and the ENTIRE HALF OF THE 5TH MOVIE WAS SPENT SHOVING MORE FRIENDSHIP SPEECHES IN HER FUCKING HEAD UNTIL SHE NUTTED UP AND STRAIGHT UP TOLD THE OTHERS TO AXE OFF MEICOOMON, while kari got 5 fucking minutes and got posessed or some shit i dont fucking know, does anyone care at this point?!

shes such a god damn self insert its PAINFUL! and ive read plenty of crappy OC digimon fanfiction in my days to be able to tell when someone props their crappy OC in a canon story. IVE DONE IT MYSELF!! its INSULTING that im watching a canon produced digimon FANFICTION more then an actual OVA. If you like her, FINE, but you CANT ignore how incredibly shallow and flawed shes written. This isnt someone “hating female characters” this is someone whos frustrated a shittly written character who is just causing repetitive sob scenes over and over and over. im sorry but have we not gotten enough flashbacks from meiko and her digimon? do we need 4 more in the fifth movie??? WE GET IT! ITS SAD! SHES SAD!! THEY ARE FRIENDS! MOVE ON ALREADY!!

i dont feel bad for her anymore, its just getting repetitive now. She ate up the entire 5th movie and left nothing to kari but the sloppy leftovers at the end, and because she ran off like an idiot to meicoomon she got tai axed off too……………...but i will get to that.

The lack of animation.

The biggest insult, and this is….dare i say…….something coming from an animation student, is the insufferable animation. The first movie is fine, but from thereon, i feel like the quality dropped significantly. and oh boy, dont get me started on the amount of time they just pan a fucking picture instead of animating them doing shit.

im sorry but did i wait 4-6 months for a fucking clipshow? I know that animating is hard, and the animation industry in japan is absolute fucking shit, but come the fuck on guys. i think movie 5 had so many times where they just panned pictures of the digimon fighting, and the kids running. I guess when you put all your budget into overanimating the short action scenes you got, you dont have much left for them to trow a punch outside of that. and i wouldnt mind if they had just bothered not doing it so much. they do it WAY TOO OFTEN!

in the 4th move they didnt even fucking bother drawing the kids wet while they were in the water. no wet droopy hair, no indication the clothing was soaked, nothing. not a god damn fucking detail or anything.

The nostalgia bait

Hey kids, remember the bus in the digital world??? remember the gear desert? remember the house mimi was a princess in?? remember the pink forest? remember seadramon? remember the dark masters???? remember any of that shit!? remember primary village?! YEAH??? REMEMBER ALL THOSE COOL 01 THINGS??? ok cool, anyway moving on.

The lack of personality/soul

one thing im really passionate about is expressions. expressive characters and facial expressions i something i enjoy drawing a lot. in the original digimon, every character was spesifically designed to be its own thing. sure they stank of the 90s, but they wer UNIQUE. Digimon tri has trown all that shit out the window. Now they all look boring as hell. the only unique thing about them now is their hair. take that away, and you get a bunch of similar looking, boring samefaced characters.

the digimon movies are just so fucking SOULLESS! everyone looks so god damn watered down and tame compared to their former selves. everyone wears a school uniform even when they got summer vacation. they even wear school uniforms as they get to the digital world, and they have NO facial expressions. NONE! the way they talk and show emotions is almost nonexistant. even once they are seriously screaming at someone or focusing on something serious, they still have that stale, boring as shit facial expression. stone faced and COLD! its like you dont even care!! seriously its so frustrating to watch sometimes because they are so god damn bland and barely deviate at all from their typical “idle” face.

^count how many fucking times tai makes this face troughout the entire series.

^am i the only one who thinks they looks very..bland and dull here? and this happens way too often.

seriously, watch the movies again and notice just how little the animators bothered giving them any fucking emotions. the screenshots here are just from a few minutes in the new movie.

And dont get me started on how everyone seemed so.........accepting of tais “death” i mean sure they might still be in shock,.....but......why did none of pic under appear????

WHy was everyone so.....noble??? except kari...who got....fucking owned.

and the digimon....most of them are just....comic relief now. i feel like most of them have little personality, but fucking agumon. what the FUCK have they done to agumon!? hes just a walking talking “i like to eat” joke. hes fucking nothinng. an empty boring sack of shit who just talks about food and NOTHING ELSE!! oh and maybe fights sometimes...but seriously.

The BAIT.

The trailers for these movies have made me fall into the bait they put out. But its getting infuriating now. All the trailer bait for movie 5 was just taken form the last 5 minutes of the film. that little teaser we all thought were going to show the dark ocean? yeah that was what….5 seconds at the very last minute of the movie? Hime was the one who went there, and they even rushed that part.

remember when we all tought that tai was the kaiser because the animators thought they copy the excact same hairstyle? remember how they all baited us with the kaiser thinking we were gonna get some 02 action? i sure as FUCK do.

i LOVED the last minutes of the movies. i loved the last half of episode 3 and the entire episode 4… but im so fucking angry that i have to wait 4-6 months for the conclusion to when the movie was JUST GETTING INTERESTING! i fucking hate it!!

The 02 kids, or lack thereof.

Ok honestly ive completely forgotten about them, and i dont understand why they bothered putting them in this movie. and they give us absolutly nothing to go on for ALL of the movies! WHY? WHATS THE POINT?! with this series endless stalling, how can they possibly explain their absence or death or whatever in what little time we have left?! how will they half ass this?! i seriously dont get how they can begin with something so intense, only to give us absolutly nothing till the last movie, IF AT ALL!

Taichis “””””””””””””””””death.”””””””””””””””””

So the fuckers had the BALLS to kill off my boi tai. They actually went there. they fucking killed him off. AND LEFT IT ON A CLIFFHANGER! wow fucking good job guys, you sure got me there. i cant believe tai is fucking dead.

except wait a second here…..tai isnt dead. of course he fucking isnt. i mean come the fuck on, are you really expecting them to kill off their marketig king? the face of all their merc? PLEASE! we all fucking know that hes going to come back. THEY BASICALLY SPOILED THE MOVIES FOR US ALREADY, didnt they say in an interview far back that these movies were whats going to lead everyone up to their careers? so why the fuck would tai die when we know hes going to be an ambassador?

i dont fucking understand why they even bothered with this fake ass death. WE KNOW HES GOING TO COME BACK! im not mad that tai “died,” im mad that they actually bothered making it a cliffhanger, as if we arent going to fucking figure out hes coming back in the next movie. WHATS THE POINT?! Are they going to just shove him off till the last 5 minutes of the last movie? is that it? are they going to do what they did to kari? or are we FINALLY going to see tai resolving his persional issues that have been shoved away to make room for everything else? who knows, who cares at this point?!

The conclusion

Digimon tri was something enjoyable for me to look forward to..but now, its just a bunch of frustrating, medicore, nostalgia cash-grabbing shitfests of movies, and i need to get it out of my system.

Im angry because i have to wait 4-6 months between each movie only to get nothing. im angry that i have to wait 4-6 months for an hour long movie that has actual content thats 20 minutes long. im sick of having my excpectations set to low, only for them to be lowered even more. im sick of seeing meiko basically becoming the main characters as the others are somewhat side characters at this point. im sick of the shit-tier animation quality and the stone-bored dull surprise faces. im sick of wanting this to be good, only to see that the fucking directors and animators arent even fucking trying anymore. Im sad, that the sequel was put in the hands of incompetent fucks who only know digimon trough their most basic character traits, and nothing more.

i do like tri...and im sad to see it go so soon….but part of me wants to get this over with, because if you like it or not, tri isnt a passionate fan sequel. tri is a boring, mediocre cash grab, and im sad it cantt be more then that, and im sad its over soon...

#Digimon tri #digimon adventure tri #rant #digimon #digimon tri spoilers

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tango-uniformed · 6 years ago

Text

Tango first 5000 words

August, 2018

5:00 PM

Amtrak en route from Baltimore MD to Greenville SC

Vivienne Bastian considered himself a fan of public transportation. He knew how to drive, but rarely did so, preferring to walk when he could or take the metro or the bus when he couldn't. He disliked riding bicycles; he had tried to get into it in college but after nearly swerving into traffic and getting hit by a dump truck, he'd given up on all that. The best kind of public transportation was riding the train. Especially long train rides. He liked to sit by the window and watch the landscape change. He liked talking to the strangers who he would never see again. It was all so terribly romantic. He fancied himself a character from one of those black and white noir movies, one of those reporters who talked like Humphrey Bogart and got into trouble and solved the mystery and saved the day.

Those guys always carried around old fashioned recording equipment and talked into it as they moved the story from act to act. It would be interesting if he started to do that, to move his own story along as he moved through it. Or, he thought, he could be like Dale Cooper and treat his recording equipment like a friend or co-worker and act like he was bouncing ideas off of it. Was that strange? It wasn't strange, was it?

To do something like that, of course, he would have to have access to the recording equipment on his phone. And the ability to speak without his uptight, insane brother ranting at him on the phone from hundreds of miles away.

"I think you've really lost it," his brother was saying in his nasally faux-New Englander voice which was an affectation he had picked up to get him further along in his career. "You pick up and leave in the middle of the night and get on a train to Tennessee of all places? I mean, I know you don't have a job to worry about, but you're an adult, you can't just abandon all your responsibilities like that. Are you having a nervous breakdown?"

"I have a job, Will," Viv said, for the thousandth time. He was sitting comfortably by himself on the train. There weren’t many passengers at, despite the fact that it was early summer and the schools were still out. "I make things and people pay me for it."

"On the internet," Will said derisively.

Viv smiled and imagined how much better life would be if he had been smart enough to not call this prissy sad sack of a man in the first place. Once Will knew where he was, it was only a matter of time before he bypassed his self-imposed oath to never talk to their parents again, and then go snitch.

"I think you're having a nervous breakdown because the theater fired you."

"That was a year ago and I am not having a nervous breakdown, you're totally projecting." Would a person who was having a nervous breakdown bother to pack a week's worth of clothes that were all planned out, outfit by outfit? Viv had even researched the weather in Chattanooga and packed accordingly. Supposedly it was pretty humid there. Would a person who was having a nervous breakdown call a friend to take care of their plants for a week? Would a person who was having a nervous breakdown even call their brother to let him know they were ok? No, no, and no. If anyone was on the verge of a nervous breakdown, it was his recently divorced brother. "I told you that I'm just trying to find Christian, I'm following the clues he left me and--"

"--You're living in an insane fantasy world--"

"--since it's clear he's tracking his old buddies down, the closest one was Virgil Osborn, who went back to his hometown in Tennessee after the service." Talking to Will was like talking to a sea-urchin. Every little thing made him spiky and defensive. Impossible. He was worse than Dad.

He was only an hour away from Greenville. Once he got there, he planned on renting a hotel for the night. He'd put the final touches on the episode-- the first episode of a series, he hoped-- and then upload it. That would really set the whole thing into motion. It was what would make it real. Once he put his intentions out there, into the universe and into the public, there was no going back. He'd have to follow through.

The only thing Viv knew about Greenville was that they had a big theater that Hamilton would be coming to later in the year. He hoped that meant they were ok with gay black people. He anticipated it being more accepting than Jeptha, the Eastern Tennessee town of 2000 he was on his way towards the next day.

Will was still ranting at him. Viv tuned back in. "Christian isn't missing. Christian is never missing, or hurt, or in trouble, or what have you. He's just him. He ran away. Again. He'll turn up when he wants to turn up. He's the only one of us who gets away with everything, and you're a fool for falling for his bullshit again. It's like you're the youngest brother or something, instead of us all being born at the same time."

"If you read the Google Docs he left--"

"--You mean his obviously PTSD fueled manifestos--"

"--There's all this shit about what happened in Kandahar, with him and Blue and the others before they all got discharged. And I think-- I mean, I'm guessing-- there was some kind of cover up that goes back to the OVA. Or the OVA found out about it through a military leak, I don't know. Christian must have thought it was a big deal, so when Osborn and Jankowski turn up dead a few months ago, he freaked out and thought this big conspiracy was behind it. And yeah, after reading it, I'm inclined to think so too." Viv took a big gulp of the canned Starbucks Frappuccino he had bought at the last stop. He needed the caffeine. He wondered if he could vape on the train. He hadn't seen any signs saying that he couldn't. Would it set off the fire alarms or something? He took his Juul out of his pants pocket and looked around for any attendants or other passengers who looked like they would complain.

"Yeah, PTSD fueled manifestos," Will said dryly. "The OVA only deals with magic. Why would he think they care about some idiots who got drunk in Afghanistan one night and only narrowly avoided getting court-martialed?"

The only passenger nearby was a middle aged white lady who looked like she had taken about a hundred valium. Viv surreptitiously took a drag on his electronic cigarette. The pod he was using was green apple flavored. He felt his nerves immediately calm and hoped that he wasn't addicted to nicotine. That couldn't happen with vapes, right? He exhaled and fanned the air a little bit as he kept talking, in a more lowered voice. "Did he tell you what happened in Kandahar?"

"He told me what he thought happened."

"With the, the black slime that started moving up from his fingernails and the way he couldn't remember any of it?" Viv thought about his own fingernails and felt the need to take another drag from his vape.

Will was silent.

"You still there?"

"Why didn't you go to Boston to see Blue if you think Christian's army buddies are showing up dead?" Will asked, staunchly changing the subject away from dissociative periods and black slime. He never liked to talk about it. Not even when it was right there in front of him affecting him. "If there really was a pattern and Osborn and Jankowski's deaths are connected, wouldn't he be next? Or wouldn't Christian have gone to him first since he's so close?"

The few times that Viv met Blue had been deeply uncomfortable since he had introduced himself under the assumption that Christian was dating him. Which was ridiculous in retrospect, since Christian had never dated anybody. But Blue had a variance that allowed him to control his own heart rate, so at least it had been fun to trick his mother into thinking the guy had fallen over dead at her table.

"There wasn't as much on him," Viv said lamely. "Just some articles from 2015 when that girl tried to rob the place he was working at and put him in the ICU for 3 days."

"I forgot about that."

"Yeah." The vapor around Viv looked a little thick. He kept waving it away and glancing around for employees. "Anyway. I don't know. It'll be interesting, an interesting story. I think people will like it."

"Don't you mean 'I think I'll find my missing brother'?" Will asked, and laughed cruelly. He laughed through his nose for some reason. Nobody else in the family laughed through their nose.

Viv wanted to put a knife into this particular brother and then twist it. "How's Emmy?" he asked.

That took all the pompousness right out of him. "Good. Almost walking," Will said, deflated. "I had her this weekend. I have to see Jennifer's attorney to finalize custody next Friday."

Hopefully that meant Jennifer would be getting more custody of Emily than Will was. His brother's ex wife was fun, attentive, and thoughtful in a corn-fed Midwesterner kind of way. She didn't need to be subjected to the dysfunctions of the Bastian family any more than she needed to be. And the baby definitely didn't need to be around any of them.

"That sucks," Viv said, as fakely as possible. "I guess I'll have to go over to your-- I mean to Jennifer's house the next time I want to babysit my niece. I'll send you pictures of her."

Without so much as a 'fuck you', Will hung up.

Viv shook his head. So dramatic. It was sad that he had to punch below the belt like that, but sometimes Will forced his hand. At least Christian never mocked him.

The last time he had seen Christian was almost a month previously. He had shown up at Viv's apartment in the middle of the night without warning, soaked with sweat and ranting about how they-- the Bastian triplets-- were not safe. That was when he had shared the Google documents with Vivienne. It was nearly 3 gigabytes of information, most of it incomprehensible. It was not the first time he had shown up out of nowhere like that, but it was the first time that he had proof to back up his claims. Most of Christian's collection of documents were information accessible from the public-- articles, screenshots from twitter, videoclips, even basic information from Wikipedia. But some of it was from the Office of Variant Affairs, as well as from the military and looked...official. He wouldn't answer any of his brother's questions, he was too amped up, just repeating that they weren't safe. By the time Viv had gotten him to de-escalate, Christian had determined that he had to go. He said that he was off to Tennessee, where Osborn had died 4 months ago, and left.

Still, Viv had not reported his brother missing. Nor had Will. Nor had their parents-- not that Christian had any contact with them recently. But surely they knew. There was no way that they were going about their lives unaware that nobody had seen one of their sons for an entire month, could they?

He had heard that if someone was missing over 30 days, they weren’t really missing any more. That was when you were supposed to send the authorities their dental records. Viv had no intention of doing that either. He knew his brother wasn’t dead, Christian was too….Christian for that. He had just Gone Girl-ed himself for whatever reason and was probably in trouble.

So he hadn’t filed a missing persons report. And he wouldn’t.

It wasn't because he didn't trust the cops to find Christian. It was because he wanted to find him himself. It was a better story that way.

Contemplating this, Viv took another long drag from his vape and exhaled.

And just like that, the smoke alarm went off.

********

ETN.ORG

APRIL 15 2018

JEPTHA MAN FOUND DEAD AT STILLWATER MOTEL DIED OF DRUG OVERDOSE

Shelly Asburn

JEPTHA- A 32 year old man who died earlier this week at the Stillwater Motel overdosed on drugs, says county medical examiner.

Virgil Alexander Osborn, of Jeptha, Tenn. was found the morning of April 13 in a car in the motel's parking lot, according to county medical examiner, Jerry Xi, who conducted the man's April 14 autopsy. The car, parked in the westward lot, was running, Xi wrote in his report, and the heat was on high.

The toxicology report has not been released. Autopsy reports show Osborn's manner of death was accidental.

County Sheriff's Office deputies found Osborn dead inside the vehicle just after 8:00 am after responding to the motel for a medical call.

Sheriff Brian Craddock had previously said foul play was not suspected in the death.

Reach Shelly Asburn at Shasburn(at)ETN.com and follow her on twitter (at)ShellyAsburnETN

*******

August, 2018

7:45 PM

Greenville, SC

The hotel Viv checked into after disembarking the train (thoroughly humiliated and publicly shamed by an attendant for vaping) was actually pretty nice. Greenville wasn't the pit of despair he had imagined it to be. It was located on a river, which he had walked next to while scoping out the big theater, the Peace Center. The place wasn't like Baltimore, but it was pretty good for the South.

Well, for what he imagined the South to be like. He had never been down there, unless you counted trips to Miami to visit his father's sister. The rest of his extended family all lived in Cuba (his father's family) or Haiti (his mother's). Between that and Viv's own dismissal of every part of the United States that wasn't California, Florida, or located above Maryland and below Maine, he didn't have much room in his heart for travel.

But Greenville was very nice. If he had more time there, he could see himself maybe going to a play and checking out some of the local restaurants. He did not have time. The bus that would drive him to Chattanooga was leaving at 8:00 in the morning, so all he could do was wind down in his hotel room.

He reclined on the bed, wearing the terrycloth robe that came with the room. The bed was comfortable, more comfortable than the one he had at home. Hotel beds always were. Viv had his headphones on and his laptop perched on top of his round stomach, carefully finalizing his edits of episode 50 of his podcast, "Slack". It was a...variety show. Most of the time he just talked about music and invited guest speakers to discuss politics or pop culture with him. Sometimes he did some investigative journalism-- mostly having to do with the arts scene or true crime. He really hadn't found his niche, but had enough listeners to scrape together barely enough to live by on Patreon. Sure, it wasn't the same as when he had been in charge of sound design at the Owensby, but it was enough.

Plus, he was his boss and could do whatever he wanted now. He had total creative control. That's what counted.

If Viv thought too hard about what Will said about him finally having a nervous breakdown over being fired, he actually would have a nervous breakdown, so he focused on work. The sound of his own voice was already starting to irritate him. He sounded very Maryland and very gay, neither of which were affectations.

"I'll keep you guys updated on this story as it unfolds," his recorded voice from 3 days ago was saying. "And for Patrons of a $10 level or more, I'll be uploading some of the documents my brother left for me-- the ones I feel safe doing so with that is." Viv rolled his own eyes at himself and tugged off his headphones.

For a few minutes he blindly surfed the internet until he found himself watching a video of a squirrel getting stuck in a bagpipe for no reason. He exited Google Chrome.

He used the remote to turn on the tv. Whoever had stayed in the room before him had left the channel on Fox News, which was like kryptonite for Viv. He stared at it for a moment, transfixed in horror. A Republican Representative from Indiana was talking, clearly begging for her seat as mid-terms approached.

"I'm just saying," she told the camera, all big teeth and dead black eyes. "There are people out there who have the inherent ability to kill others using nothing but their minds, and the OVA does nothing to regulate this. Sure, these school shootings get a ton of press, but what about the guy who goes postal and snaps his wife's neck telekinetically? What about the people who can create fires just by blinking? Shouldn't everyone else have the right to protect themselves using firearms?"

An image of his father, who had walked with a cane since the age of 35 after his left leg was irreparably mangled by gunfire during his service came to Viv's mind. He shook himself from his trance and flipped the channel to Real Housewives of Orange County.

He exited out of the sound editing software on his laptop and pulled up Christian's Google docs, scanning through them to see if anything new caught his eye. So far, he had only organized them into sections. One section pertained only to Tennessee and Virgil Osborn. Another contained information about Monty Jankowski's death in California. One section was about Blue. One was just for Christian-- for some reason, his discharge papers and medical records were all scanned in there, although there was nothing out of the ordinary there. But Christian had also included his report cards from Elementary school, as well as notes from 2008 when he had been forced to see a therapist. Then there were miscellaneous bits and bobs of information. There were emails Christian had exchanged with thauma-slurry distilling factories from some big company, Proverge. There were old scanned paper documents in Russian that Viv couldn't make heads or tails of. Academic studies from the OVA's disease prevention branch coupled with Wikipedia pages on biological warfare. Every single episode of his podcast. A video of their mother playing the piano at a concert in Germany during the 1980's. A photograph of their father when he was young, surrounded by smiling people. Will's medical records. A copy of Jennifer's sonogram when she was pregnant with Emily. A copy of the pink slip Viv had received when he got fired.

How did an ex-military chump turned security consultant like Christian get his hands on all this?

He clicked on Osborn's files and rapidly began going through them again, preparing himself for the next day. The toxicology report had not been released yet, but Christian's notes emphasized that he had died overdosing a methamphetamine-fentanyl speedball. Since Christian seemed to know everything these days, Viv believed him. His brother had even narrowed down Osborn's dealer from blurry convenience store camera footage; a tall young woman called Arlene Kennelly who was involved in the local criminal organization.

The puzzle pieces were all there but it was up to him to put them together. He was less good at detective work than he had once assumed, and it frustrated him. He clicked out of Osborn's files.

Viv watched the video of his mother playing the piano, hoping that it would calm him down. It was from before she had triplets, and she was beautiful and happy. She was a better pianist than anyone he had ever paid to see, it was no wonder that she had gone all over the world when she was in her 20's. In the video, Maya Bastian (for some strange reason, Viv's father had taken her name and let go of his name, Perez) played the solo piano part of Rhapsody in Blue in front of a crowd of people in uniform. Her hair hid her face from the camera.

Hearing her play made him feel a little bit better. It reminded him of being a kid, when she was teaching him and his brothers. It made him think of the way she would guide his hands on the keyboard, and the way that everything seemed right in those moments.

It made him feel better but not better enough to forget that at one point Christian had rooted through his garbage like a psychotic raccoon in order to retrieve his pink slip.

Thinking about that made him feel itchy. He snapped his laptop shut and grabbed the room service menu, eyeing the mac and cheese. Food was good. Food would make him feel better, along with a hot shower. He had another long drive in the morning, to a probably terrible little town that nobody had heard of. Viv needed his rest.

I AM NOT TORTURING MYSELF BY WRITING VIV BEING ANNOYING FOREVER JUST PRETEND IM WRITING THINGS THAT ARE SIGNIFICANT AND I'LL FILL IT IN LATER I GUESS. I’M JUST GOING TO SKIP AROUND.

********

ROBERT RAPHAEL KENNELLY

Booking Number: ########

Booking on: 05/26/2010

County: Hamilton

Date Of Birth: 01/15/1989

Charges 1. Violation Description: FELONY POSSESSION SCH II CS

Bond Amount: $50,000

********

In his dream, Viv looked at himself in the mirror in the bathroom of his childhood home and saw that he was 7 again. The child version of him was fatter than he was at 32, and wore his hair in a little afro because his mother thought it was cute. He wore a t shirt with a dinosaur on it and red sneakers. But Viv was only looking at his face. His child-self's face. He was unable to look away, or even break the gaze from his own big brown eyes.

And in his dream his nose and mouth were covered with thick black slime.

*********

US ARMY DD214 PARTIAL TRANSCRIPT

BASTIAN, CHRISTIAN MATEO ######### ########

ARMY RA ######### 02 SEPT 2007

######### MARYLAND 30 MAY 1986

OTH ########## ##########

######### ########## ##########

######### ########## #########

AFGHANISTAN 02 SEPT 07-- 13 JAN 08

#############

*******

August, 2018

8:00 AM

Stillwater Motel, Jeptha, TN

There was no free continental breakfast at the Stillwater, but the woman at the front desk noticed how dead on his feet Viv looked, and made him a fresh pot of coffee. She even poured it for him and seemed to want to sit and chat as he drank it. Her name tag read "Beth". She was exactly what Viv imagined when he thought of someone who would work at a crappy motel in Appalachia. A white woman in her 50's with a weathered face, badly bleached hair, and a big smile that he couldn't quite let himself trust. Her features were slightly abnormal in the way that people who were exposed to certain kinds of magic became. Sharp teeth, big ears. Her sandpapery skin was mottled green on her neck and hands, as if she was permanently bruised. As if she was rotting.

"What you here for?" she asked him as he took his first sip of coffee. It was surprisingly good. She had added two creams and two sugars just like he had asked. Underneath her accent was the distinct lisp that anyone whose mouth and teeth were affected by magic got. "The only thing 'round here for visitors to do is hunt, and the season don't start for months."

Did he look like the kind of guy who went blowing holes in defenseless animals? He was wearing dark wash jeans, sneakers, a black t shirt and a light grey hoodie over it; his 'dressed down' look. He was trying to keep any hint at flamboyancy out of his voice. Was he that good at acting or was this lady making fun of him?

“Well,” said Viv, thinking wildly as he drank his excellent coffee. He might as well try to find the girl who sold Osborn the drugs that killed him. Waving a picture of Christian and asking if anyone had seen him seemed less effective, more disastrous. He would save that for further along in this particular excursion, when he had some solid ground to base his assumptions on. “Well. I’m looking up my friend who I met on the internet.”

“Ah,” said the desk woman, Beth. She smelled like tobacco. “How millenial.”

He decided to just go for it. This was a town of 2000, after all. The chance that any given person he talked to knew someone who he actually needed to talk to was phenomenal. “Do you know an Arlene Kennelly?”

“I know some Kennellys. Not sure about an Arlene,” said Beth. She unfolded a local newspaper, appearing uninterested. “There’s a whole hive of Kennellys around here.” For a second she looked up and made eye contact with Viv, just long enough to be meaningful. “Not sure ‘bout your friend, but my mama wouldn’t let me play with nobody from that family when I was coming up.”

What the fuck did that mean.

Viv backtracked. “My friend is very nice,” he said, knowing for a fact that that was not true. Well, he was guessing it was true. The woman he was looking for didn’t have anything in Christian’s collection, as far as he knew, and cursory google search of her name had brought up no arrest records. On the other hand, it was clear that she was a drug dealer partially responsible for the death of Virgil Osborn, and, according to Christian, involved with the whole plot. “Thanks for the information, though. And the coffee.”

“Anytime, sugar.”

He retreated to his room to get ready for the day and to make sense of what the desk woman had meant. Since he planned on staying in the area for more than a few nights, he didn’t want to piss any service employees off. Hopefully she would make him coffee again tomorrow, and maybe they would talk again and he would bounce some things off of her local knowledge.

In Viv’s room was the following: all he had packed since he got on the train to come south. 7 outfits. His pajamas. 2 pairs of shoes. Toiletries. His laptop, his headphones, and the cords for both of those objects. Nothing else. It made him feel like he was a foreign journalist in Malaysia or something. Living rough.

As he paused to grab his phone charger, he caught a glimpse of himself in the old mirror that hung above the room’s dresser. It was something that had been bought in the 80’s or 90’s, with a yellowing trim and warped face. Viv usually avoided looking at himself in mirrors, for a myriad of reasons, but he decided to right then. He looked tired. There were bags under his eyes like he had not slept. His skin looked dry. He was not smiling, not excited.

There was nothing to be done about it.

********

Cedars-Sinai Medical Center

8700 Beverly Blvd

Los Angeles, CA

90048

###-###-####

######@##########

March 17, 2005

Levi Monday

############

Los Angeles, California, 661

Dear Mr. Monday,

Our repeated attempts to collect the balance due on your mother's account which you cosigned for have been ignored. Your account has been referred to an outside collection agency, ####### Collection Agency Services. In order to prevent negative marks on your credit history, we suggest you contact us immediately to make a payment. We accept MasterCard, VISA, and Discover.

If your payment is already on its way, we thank you and ask that you please disregard this notice. If not, we would appreciate receipt of your payment as soon as possible. If you are unable to make payment in full due to financial difficulties, a reasonable payment plan is available so you can satisfy your obligation and keep your account in good standing. If you would like to further discuss the details of your account, please do not hesitate to call patient billing at ###-###-####.

Sincerely,

Patient Billing

Cedars-Sinai Medical Center

**********

August, 2018

11:30 AM

Main Street, Jeptha, TN

At least the weather was nice.

That was the only good thing Viv could say about this small town, after wandering around it all morning. It was balmy outside. Not too hot, not too windy, barely humid at all. A moderate summer day. Pleasant. He had been expecting more heat, but really, it was not much different than it was back home.

“Ok,” he said, speaking into the recorder on his phone and hoping that he came off as more of a ‘Dale Cooper’ than an insane man who was talking to himself. He thought about naming his imaginary audience. Who could be his Diane? He liked the name ‘Francis’ but was leaning towards the more classic ‘Dear Listeners’. “It’s been hours now and I haven’t learned anything apart from everyone in this town knows a Kennelly or two. I just haven’t found the one I’m looking for. Getting frustrated. I feel like I did when I was canvassing in college.”

He was sitting on a bench in the downtown area of Jeptha. If you could call it a downtown area. There were a few little stores lining Main Street-- a hardware store, a diner, a pawn shop and the like-- but nothing of any real interest and nothing that would lure in tourists. The whole place was run down. From what he could tell, most of the town’s jobs came from a nearby factory, the boiled cabbage like fumes of which he could smell and were making him ill. It was a place that would have made him sad, if he had sat down and thought about it. But Viv only had room in his mind for his purpose there and shoved any contemplative thoughts to the back of his mind for later, when he would need them for adding flavor to his story.

“Thinking about getting lunch,” he said into his phone. A stretched-out looking teenage boy wearing a Black Sabbath shirt walked by him and made eye contact. Viv didn’t look away from him. He wasn’t scared of any redneck high schooler, variant or not. “There’s a Bojangles near the motel. And there’s a diner. I don’t know, it looks like some local flavor. Maybe I can ask around in there. And there’s probably pie, that’s always a plus.”

#writing

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kidsviral-blog · 7 years ago

Text

LeSean McCoy deletes Twitter account after rant at mother of his child

New Post has been published on https://kidsviral.info/lesean-mccoy-deletes-twitter-account-after-rant-at-mother-of-his-child/

LeSean McCoy deletes Twitter account after rant at mother of his child

http://twitter.com/#!/hollyrpeete/status/295417712711188480

Indeed. This time, we agree with Holly Robinson Peete.

Many Twitter users were disgusted overnight when Philadelphia Eagles running back LeSean McCoy went after the mother of his child on Twitter. His nickname is “Shady” and, boy, does it fit.

Lost a lot of respect for LeSean McCoy, some conflicts should be taken care of in private…don’t drag your fanbase into it. #GrowTheHellUp

— Sean Kopitsky (@SeanKopitsky) January 27, 2013

In other news, LeSean McCoy and his ex are not sharing in today’s jubilation over Philly sports….#babymammadrama

— Corrado (@corrado_19) January 27, 2013

We will return to our regular programming after this LeSean McCoy Twitter meltdown…

— Sarah Spain(@SarahSpain) January 27, 2013

@tlouden3 he was still tweeting at 3 am from a club somewhere hot, so if they did, it was quick and urgent

— Kyle Scott (@CrossingBroad) January 27, 2013

The mother of his child issued some accusations, claiming he neglects his son. She also tweeted a little too much information.

@cutondime25 but you didn’t one this blessing you wanted me to get an abortion right ok wanna act like a dad now but you left for 4 months

— Steph (@Angelface0330) January 27, 2013

Wow. Taking a page from Toure’s repugnant book?

@cutondime25 for your bitch but where the glad ones at without the herpes yeah ok… Ok shut up now with your herpes having ass

— Steph (@Angelface0330) January 27, 2013

@cutondime25 And talking about worthless … Pussy your worthless dont forget you step out of my sons life for 4 months !

— Steph (@Angelface0330) January 27, 2013

@cutondime25 Small dick herpes having nigga ! and i heard you went to the dick doctor to get a bigger dick Sydney told Nye …smh

— Steph (@Angelface0330) January 27, 2013

@cutondime25 oh and you cant get up ? she said yall went and got that fix to ! Hows that working out ?

— Steph (@Angelface0330) January 27, 2013

@cutondime25 here so you can see how your girl Sydney be putting ur business out there lol facts she talks bout you twitter.com/Angelface0330/…

— Steph (@Angelface0330) January 27, 2013

@cutondime25 lol your girl be dogging you big time n here is prove lol twitter.com/Angelface0330/…

— Steph (@Angelface0330) January 27, 2013

@bree_lovesbey I had to put the truth out there so he can stop acting like a great dad when last summer he left his son from may till sept

— Steph (@Angelface0330) January 27, 2013

LeSean responds: All class. And by class, we mean the exact opposite.

RT @cutondime25: @angelface0330 ya family live off me I don’t even know uu a somebody now cuz of me????U dumb dirty n broke … U n ya…

— Despicable Meech (@beard_god) January 27, 2013

Uh ohRT @cutondime25: Hahaha all my followers. N friends tell @angelface0330 to get a job n stop (cont) tl.gd/kr9jup

— We want Easy (@DatDudeEasy) January 27, 2013

That’s right. He oh-so-bravely calls upon his fans to go after … the mother of his child. But, guess what? Brave LeSean has deleted his entire Twitter account, not just the tweets. Alas, LeSean, the internet is forever.

Screenshots via Tweetwood.com:

Oh, well. As long as he is having fun at a club! The mother of his child responds further.

@loqik that’s the point I don’t care about his personal but when he picks bitches ova his son yeah I’m gonna get mad bc he just came back

— Steph (@Angelface0330) January 27, 2013

@bosseduplala I don’t care who he’s fucking ya care about my baby now but when I was pregnant your cuzn not ones did he call to ask

— Steph (@Angelface0330) January 27, 2013

@bosseduplala about his son he wasn’t even there when he was born he left my son 2 after he was born for the next bitch yeah care so much

— Steph (@Angelface0330) January 27, 2013

@bosseduplala about his son he wasn’t even there when he was born he left my son 2 after he was born for the next bitch yeah care so much

— Steph (@Angelface0330) January 27, 2013

@bosseduplala about my son but what everybody is failing to realize is lesean just came back to his son life jr is 9 month where was lesean

— Steph (@Angelface0330) January 27, 2013

@angelface0330 I appreciate ya caring about my son but what I am not gonna appreciate is lesean acting like this great dad when we all know

— Steph (@Angelface0330) January 27, 2013

@angelface0330 that’s far from the truth

— Steph (@Angelface0330) January 27, 2013

LeSean then tweeted “hacked.” Convenient! Oh, and he tweeted that right before deleting his entire Twitter account.

Most are not buying it.

“@danlevythinks:wow, Shady McCoy nuked his Twitter. Or his agent did. Totally gone. See you, @cutondime25”U can still read all mentions

— Duane (@AppTrailHiker) January 27, 2013

Did @cutondime25 close his account after the ratchet buffoonery of last night? I bet PR went OFF.

— Cristin (@CristinMcGrath) January 27, 2013

“@cutondime25: Hacked” I’ll take what happens after going nuts on ur baby momma in public for 500 Alex

— LostandFound (@blue_todd) January 27, 2013

While some fans answered his despicable call to attack the mother of his child (which LeSean then oh-so-classily retweeted), most fans are disgusted by LeSean’s (if not “hacked”) actions.

. @cutondime25 you’re embarrassing your fans. Not only because of publicizing your drama, but your pathetic grammar.

— Fake Kara°(ッ)/° (@TimonenPumba) January 27, 2013

.@cutondime25 I approve of your attitude concerning your bastards. Would that I had twitter in my day to mock the women I had impregnated.

— Old Hoss Radbourn (@OldHossRadbourn) January 27, 2013

.@cutondime25 I appreciate the adult manner in which you handled an intensely personal issue with the mother of your child

— TrebLaw (@treblaw) January 27, 2013

On behalf of the city of Philadelphia, can you guys stop now? We’re getting embarrassed. Thanks. @angelface0330 @cutondime25

— Lauren (@labelle_19) January 27, 2013

@cutondime25 You didn’t know she was a bum when you ejaculated inside her? Or did she just become a bum?

— On The Inside Sports (@BadGirlsSports) January 27, 2013

And a protip for LeSean:

Maaaaaan, if only there was a way for @cutondime25 to prevent unwanted pregnancies with women whose name he didn’t know #getonthatinventors

— Sarah Spain(@SarahSpain) January 27, 2013

Another Twitter user hopes for something that seems to be near impossible, unless that whole “hacked” thing proves true.

May Lesean McCoy respect women.

— NFL Jesus (@NFLJesus) January 27, 2013

Indeed. Based on LeSean’s Twitter feed last night, we won’t hold our breath.

Read more: http://twitchy.com/2013/01/27/classless-nfls-lesean-mccoy-deletes-twitter-account-after-disgusting-rant-at-mother-of-his-child/

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