#ok bye i love them
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Cross posted on ao3 <3
Angst, grief/mourning, arguing, resolved argument, emotional hurt/comfort
1.9k words
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Even Ice Melts☁️
third person
“You’re dangerous, Mitchell,”
Maverick exhales, but doesn’t look around to Iceman.
“You may not like the guys flying with you, and they may not like you, but what kind of excuse is that for what you just pulled up there?”
“I knew I could take the shot,”
“And leave Hollywood struggling in your dust like that?”
“Why are you doing this?” Maverick turns around to face him.
“What?”
“Pinning the blame on me?”
“Pinning the blame-?! It was your doing,”
“So why are you defending Hollywood?”
Ice looks incredulously at him. “Because that could have gone so wrong up there,”
“You don’t think I know that?” Maverick steps into Ice’s personal space, closing the gap between them.
“Of course I do,” Ice lifts his head up.
“Then why are you making an argument about this if your so sure it’s my fault?”
“Because I know it’s your fault,” his voice was cold.
Maverick was glad it was just them both in the locker room when Ice says the next thing.
“You don’t know that you’re dangerous. You don’t know how much trouble that could mean for anyone else, and you don’t care about the consequences for any of your actions because you never had anyone to teach you about them,” he says.
Maverick’s frown deepens. “Don’t bring that up,”
“Being dangerous up there only leads to crashing and burning on the way down. You’d know that if your surname wasn’t so infected by tragedy,” Ice had hit a nerve, and he was so full with concern for Hollywood and Wolfman that he didn’t care that he was pressing down on it harder than he should.
“It is not infected by tragedy,”
“It is, that’s why nobody likes you,”
Maverick goes silent, the anger inside him making his blood boil, and he didn’t want to escalate the tension in the room more by rising to Ice’s bait.
“No one will be there to mourn you when you crash and burn,” Ice hisses slowly.
Oh how he hated Iceman.
“Then let us hope I crash and burn tomorrow,” he says harshly, still somehow maintaining eye-contact with him.
Ice’s gaze was cold, freezing in fact, as he watches Maverick turn around and leave without another word.
~~~
Then the next day does come. Hop 31, and it would cast a shadow on Maverick for the rest of his life.
It all happened so fast, almost too fast for Maverick to comprehend. But he’s all too aware of the blood on his hands.
The blood that stains his flightsuit.
The blood that felt so hot compared to the salt of the sea water.
The blood of Goose’s that was all his fault.
He was in the water, holding him up, he doesn’t know how long for, but it was cold. It was so cold it seeped into his bones and felt like it was tainting the edges of his soul. Goose was gone, and it was all his fault. It was exactly how Ice had said.
The day before he was stupid, doing some risky manoeuvre that almost pushed Hollywood and Wolfman into a spin, and even though it didn’t, it gave them all a scare. And then now, today, he was too impatient, like he always is, he went to get the shot but at the cost of a flat-spin and the sickening noise of Goose’s head meeting the canopy roof as it failed to come off.
Maverick called for him to pull the handle because he couldn’t reach it, the gravity that shouldn’t have been there pushing him forward, his hands trapped under him.
And now he really didn’t have anyone to mourn him, since he’d murdered the only person who was his family.
He didn’t know if he was still in the water or in the stuffy helicopter. It didn’t make a difference.
Maverick felt sick, so sick, so numb and cold yet so hyper-aware of everything. The whir of the rotors, the blood on his hands that was still there, despite having his hands cleaned of it, the way his feet were soaked in his boots, the way the cupboard attached to the wall was ever so slightly open. The way a paramedic was trying to talk to him. The way the door was closed between him and Goose’s body. The way he could see his cracked red and white striped helmet through the slit of glass in the door.
~~~
That night he was sat on the bed in the hospital, and he didn’t know what he felt. He was cold, colder than he’d ever been in his life, and he regrets taking those two cold showers in a row; the night before and in the morning. The t-shirt he had on was too thin to do anything to his shivers, which were escalating each minute as the temperature outside dropped and as rain lightly pattered on the window.
It was July, late July at that, why was he so cold?
But he knows. It’s because the sea seeped into him. It’s because he killed Goose. It’s because he was alone.
But soon, way too soon, his thoughts switch on to that blue-eyed blond-haired pilot who he had that argument with yesterday. Iceman Kazansky. But despite the argument, despite the hard stares he’d give him, despite his frozen personality, he was the only person Maverick wanted to see. He knew that was going to be impossible unless he left the hospital and went to his house. Which he didn’t really want to do. Just by looking at the drizzle outside the window, Maverick knew it would only cool him down more.
But then again, he felt like a slave to the heart-wrenching feeling inside of him. He knew it would come for him like it came for him after his mother’s death, but he didn’t realise it would hit him this badly.
The grief felt like chest-ache and heartburn and seasickness all at the same time. It felt like his chest had been crushed. It felt like he couldn’t breathe.
He wanted to go to Ice. He didn’t know why, or even what he’d do if he did go to see him, he just knew he needed somebody. Somebody to hold him, somebody to sit next to, and somebody was better than nobody.
He didn’t care if they were frozen.
He was colder.
Iceman stands at his door, staring at the handle of it.
Go. Don’t go. Go.
Don’t go, he hates you.
Go, he needs you.
Don’t go. Go.
He doesn’t know what to do.
Ice sighs heavily, frowning at the door, wishing for his mind to say one thought to him. Wishing he could make a decision on whether to go and see Maverick at the hospital or stay at his house. Maverick hated him, he knows that.
Ice wishes he didn’t say what he did to him. He wants to turn back the clock and never even start to talk to him, never even have had the thought that said ‘tell him what he’s done’.
But Maverick is in the hospital, in a room, all by himself. He can’t even begin to imagine what was going through his head, what he was thinking; but Ice wanted to go and see him. To at least try to mend his mistake, to try to alleviate some of the pain Maverick must be feeling.
But Maverick hated him. He’d made sure of that when he’d said he would have no one to mourn him. When he’d said he had no one to teach him how dangerously he was behaving. When he had said all of the things he had.
He just wanted to fix what he’d said.
And suddenly they were face to face, the orange light from a lamppost above them illuminating the rain coming down on them.
Iceman stands there in front of him, and Maverick can hardly see his facial expression in the dark and through the rain, but most of all he doesn’t know why he’s stood there.
“I know what you said,” Maverick says quietly, clenching his jaw, trying to forget about the void inside of him and the rain dripping off his chin.
Iceman just looks at him, the rain making his hair shiny and dull at the same time in the light from the streetlamp.
“And now its true but- I just don’t know what to do,” Maverick stops himself there, if he let the words he wanted to say flow there’d be no stopping them.
Then Ice does something he wouldn’t have ever expected him to do; he steps closer to him and slides his arms around him.
Maverick was suddenly encased in the taller pilot’s embrace, and he suddenly felt like he couldn’t breathe, or move, or do anything.
“Breathe,” Ice says quietly.
It wasn’t an order, but Maverick does so anyway, releasing the breath he’d been holding and sucking one in again, squeezing shut his eyes.
It’s only when his head meets Ice’s shoulder that the last lock on his barely-held-together floodgates breaks.
And he doesn’t care. He doesn’t care about his reputation as the fearless pilot. He doesn’t care about the tears streaming down his cheeks and his sobs that he tries to muffle in Ice’s shoulder.
“Mav I’m so sorry,” Ice whispers against his head. The grief was choking him, so all Ice can do is hold him as tight as he possibly can, and pretend he wasn’t crying himself. The rain helps with that. He didn’t feel at all like his callsign and the personality it came with. He felt like Tom, like the kid who was nerdy and studied too hard and felt too many things until he’d made up Iceman to hide behind.
“Pete, you’re freezing,” He says once Maverick had stopped crying so hard against him. The shorter pilot was shivering, clenching his jaw to stop his teeth from chattering.
He doesn’t say anything.
“Lets go back,”
“D- don’t leave,” he stutters. He’d only sink back into the gaping hole in his chest if Ice left him now.
“I’m not going to, no way, not tonight,” Ice murmurs.
Maverick keeps himself as close as he can to him as they walk slowly back to the hospital and he leads Ice back to the room he was supposed to be in.
And he keeps himself there as Ice pulls a grey-blue, slightly scratchy woollen blanket around them both as he sits back on the bed with him. His shivers were diminishing the longer he pressed himself up against Ice, but he still felt cold inside.
“Maverick, I’m sorry,” he says after a few moments. “Yesterday, I.. I wasn’t thinking, I didn’t mean any of it,”
Maverick stares at his hand for a few seconds before he takes it. “I know,” his voice was gravelly as he pushes his fingers through Ice’s.
Ice looks at their hands, then at Maverick, leaning on his shoulder, looking so devoid of his normal aura of bright sunshine. “It’s not your fault,”
Maverick sniffs and keeps his eyes on their hands, half not knowing how to respond and half being too drained to do so.
Ice wasn’t expecting him to reply. He stays there with him the whole night, never once letting go, especially when the drizzle outside brings thunder and distant flashes of lightning. Or maybe Maverick was holding him at that point because he felt him tense up and flinch at the thunder.
Either way, maybe Iceman Kazansky wasn’t as cold as he seemed to be.
#ms tg#ms fanfics#ms art#ok so i wrote this and cried so don’t blame me if u cry too#and i just watched willow and . omg?#ok bye i love them#wet hair is so hard to draw-#icemav#top gun#top gun 1986#pete maverick mitchell#tom iceman kazansky#icemav fanfic
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erm hallo 👋👋
have some doodlez !!
#art#undertale au#fan art#dust sans#killer sans#horror sans#nightmare sans#murder time trio#doodle#i should be studying#help#its 2am#BUT THEYRE SO SILLY I LOVE THEM#theyre all menaces to society#they need therapy and nightmare is NOT helping#ok bye i shall return too my year long hibernation#honk shoo mimimimi#ALSO IT WAS KILLERS BIRTHDAY AND I ALMOST FORGOT EUEEUEU</3
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Long distance besties. This definitely happened after the third movie (source: trust me bro)
Based on this
#anyways time to yap in the tags 😋☝️#but first ummmm lemme just tag some shit#how to train your dragon#httyd#httyd hiccup#hiccup haddock#hiccup horrendous haddock iii#toothless#httyd toothless#ok i think that its done#anyways this definitely happaned after the dragons left like just trust me bro 🙏🙏🙏🙏#omfg i wanted to make this with hijack as well cause lol. do you get it. they're long distance LOLOLOL#maybe i will make it who knows. is it weird to make the same art trend with different characters??#OH WAIT FORGOT ANOTHER TAG#hicctooth#is this the duo name for them#or is it called#hictooth#doesnt matter. what matters is that theyre literally the definition of platonic soulmates bro#like wtf i love them#sorry for making them look miserable i didnt meant for them to look lile that 😭😭😭😭#omg with that being said#BROOOOOO I AM NOT GONNA DRAW DRAGONS ANYMORE IM DONEEEEE HOW DO YOU DRAW DRAGONS 😭😭😭😭😭🙏🙏#anyways first attempt do you like it. SAY YES RIGHT NOW#if you read this much till the end you need to kiss me rn muah muah muah#also say i did a good job at making them look like cookies like#say it rn#okie bye byeeeeee#I FORGOT TO ADD HIS BRAID IM GONNA KMSSSSSS NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO#omg i failed
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lovey dovey (alt ver of the first one under the cut!)
#HEEHEEEEE GINHIJI BIG LOVE#so refreshing that i can mess around and draw them to my hearts content…..#so domestic here……..im sick cough cough splat#i love them so goddamn much you have no idea#all the little moments that are possible are so fun to draw even if i mostly just draw them yelling and arguing most of the time#i’ve read too much fluff fic and now this is what i have fhdnnfjdjfn suffer with me#silly men are silly and in love#sakata gintoki#hijikata toushirou#ginhiji#gintoki x hijikata#hijigin#hijikata x gintoki#gintama#ok bye
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the thing is; this world needs you exactly as you are.
#haven't posted in a while because i don't have a lot to say#the vast volume of posts in the past were often coming from the version of me that needed to hear them#lately i don't need to hear anything. i guess.#there might be something there#anyway. i hope you're doing well! i'm in the thick of my internship and working every day all day#i did decide that i HAVE to learn blender all of a sudden last weekend so that's going on#and i'm trying to get tickets to skz tomorrow... wish me so much luck#ok. love you. bye again!#positivity#mental health#the healing (starts here)#growth in the self#positive suggestions
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A little 15 min doodle but first post of the year has to be Bingqiu!
#ok its time to get mushy in the tags because I doubt anyone would read them too closely#I’ve had severe art block for YEARS before I got into danmei in 2024#and it wasn’t that my skill was gone it’s just that I thought nothing I did was good enough#I started reading danmei around the summer of last year and I got SO INSPIRED#I dived into the fandom side of things (I haven’t been in a live fandom in years) and was so excited about all the art people were making#and writing! and music! and animatics!#everything was so bright and colorful and beautiful#and everyone had such cool designs for these book characters that I’d grown to love#so I took a chance and doodled a little Luo Binghe and posted him on here#and I was so taken aback by how welcoming and sweet the fandom was#it made me wanna keep taking chances and posting my art— because I think that’s one of the hardest things I’ve come to accept#that even if it’s not good enough for me#someone else may enjoy it#and ain’t it crazy that ive come to enjoy drawing again too#sure the interaction has been fun but it’s been even more fun experimenting with my style and experimenting with colors and rendering#and grayscale and angles#and composition and expressions#ahh!! art is so fun!! I forgot how fun it was!!#I had forgotten how much I loved to draw!!#and the fandom— so many ideas are exchanged and I’ve met some of the loveliest people thru the sv fandom!#tgcf too but they’re a little less chill lmao#anyways#I’ve set up a little spot in the fandom and I plan to keep at it here it’s very nice and cozy and funny and warm#huge thanks to everyone for being so kind and welcoming#and an even bigger thanks to anyone who’s interacted with my art#I still can’t wrap my head around the fact that someone took the time out of their day to like/repost these silly little doodles I post#incredible. ok bye for now :)#svsss#bingqiu#hoot art
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Pokémon Timeskip Series: Battle Legend Lyra 🍒🍂
One of the two Johto-Kanto champions, Lyra is best known for her bright and cheery down to earth attitude both on and off the battle field! She likes to travel ALOT you can find her in coffee shops in Kalos or surfing the waves in Alola or just about anywhere with her Fiancé, Silver by her side and never turns down a challenge to a good battle (even if she accidentally sweeps the other person’s team whoops) Her favorite drink is boba tea, her birthday is March 4th, she has a crippling gatcha AND otome addiction, and is 165 cm tall but that’s all for text no one is gonna read aaaaaa-
Drew out my timeskip Lyra due to me wanting to update a few things in regards to her design (can’t believe it’s been almost two years since my timeskip designs HELP) but I hope you enjoy!
Twitter Link
#pokemon#Trainer Lyra#Pokemon hgss#Lyra pokemon#Art#Her team is actually inspired by my SacredGold run btw! Hence why she has a Glaceon ha ha#(and she has a Farigiraf and Phanpy as well but I forgot to put them sorry)#pokemon timeskip#hgss#-points at her- they don’t know she’s my favorite (next to dawn)#I love her design so much she’s so hello Kitty ok she’s sooooo strawberry shortcake alright#Minnie mouse looking ass I love her so fucking much#she and silver are married cause I said so#it’s actually vague in my verse if she’s the npc role btw cause she DOES have the hgss mom and Ethan has the GSC mom! Also I’m super biased#Kris is the only one who’s truly a npc lol (lab assistant)#My ethan is a blend of npc Ethan and gold so my Lyra is a bit of Pokemas Lyra but also my own hcs if that makes sense#Also she and Kris are sisters!!! V important!!!! They are hello Kitty and Mimi to me if you compare the two I’ll explode you with my mind!!#gotta upload my art on tumblr but I’m lazy as hell lmfao#anyways uhhhhh#Hanamaru kunikida vibes for her btw…. please listen to Akogare Ranraran for full Lyracore vibes for this image thx#ALSO…. LISTEN TO LOVELY LOVELY STRAWBERRY BY KUBO YURIKA FOR MAXIMUM VIBES OF MY LYRA INTERPRETATION THX#Ok bye lol#Ally draws stuff
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my heart forever yours
#sidlink#art#sidon x link#sidon#link#lets go out with a bang#this will be my first and only post#jk lol#hi so this account is exclusively meant for posting ship content#potentially even something spicier but ill burn that bridge when i get there#idk im not expecting much from this but i just wanted to be cringe and free#anyway i went all out on this one can you tell#cuz from now on i will be drawing them half naked#would rather be shot than draw sidon's jewelry ever again#i love you king but your design is the bane of my existence#ok too many tags bye bye
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Fics rec of the week, and especially if you like well-written Wrecker, is the entire work of @electrikworm on AO3 In order:
The Batch have a terrible day
Human Shield
A peaceful moment
(But go read the others too)
#star wars#star wars the bad batch#the bad batch fanart#tbb fanfiction#tbb wrecker#tbb omega#again luring you all to suffer with me#hurt/comfort my BELOVED#Some of the best Wrecker fics outa there#go comment on them and all#I already ranted in the previous post so you're free#Slowly illustrating all the fics saved on my phone#Next ones are probably gonna be more angsty tho#I love drawing Wrecker tbh#tho I always fk up his proportions#I'm so bad at keeping proportions TAT#that's why I can't draw fast for s 'cause I check and recheck all the time#and it's never righhhhht#shoulder to head ratio who are you#Trying to give a spotlight to all the Batch haha#impossible#ok time to close (again) tumblr for a week#bye
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I love, Ms Paint. CHEERS!
OK real art dump over. Click MORE for Real dumb stuff
something something They faces killing me why nobody gaf. Its a Transparent .PNg! You can put them any where to Not Care About.
#deltarune#spamton#deltarune fanart#big shot spamton#spamton g spamton#spamton neo#swatch deltarune#my art#art#shitpost#sillyposting#deltarune addisons#dont tag as ship#i dont think anyone would tag as ship cause thats kind of the biggest reach on planet earth Butt ok im making sure ok? ok thank you#Ok. real tags over im gonna yap my jaw off now#the sneo drawing had me weeping on my knees in tears i fucking hate drawing im gonna swallow 50 pounds of Hay in the Stabels like a Horse.#in RAGE. swear to frucking Gosh!!!!!!#Im Proud It but its also Not my Favorite... But it is. i dont know. I HATE DRAWING!!!!!!!!! Lie. I love drawing.#can you tell i dont know how to watermark#i dont know how to watermark i dont know how to tag#I dont know how to format a post#But i know one thing...#I am President of Gay America.#Can you believe those 2 swatch drawings were done a day apart!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!#First I lol'd... and then I serioused. Thats what happened with me drawing in mspaint I Guess. does wonders For soceity#In 5 months... Im going To Hate all these and delete this entire post Or something likewise#I am a weak and fragile man. Make sure to Like and re-Blog to keep my Bones from collapsing in the winds of the storm. Much appreciated#By the way the bshot spamton with a red button up instead of a red suit is from a drawing i saw once but i do not remember it.#nor the original artist. ive never seen anyone else do it (Because i dont consume fandom content often) so like Credit to them for te inspo#Ok bye
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Do you think that we’re soulmates in every universe? (Digital)
WHEW… REDID THIS ON MY IPAD BECAUSE I WAS VERY PROUD OF HOW IT CAME OUT
Putting the panels separated for a better quality, but if you want, here are the full images :)
Edit: lmao I'm killing twitter with this one
#murder drones#murder drones n#murder drones v#serial designation n#serial designation v#butler n#maid v#envy#envy murder drones#murder drones envy#n x v#envied#n fanart#v fanart#murder drones fanart#murder drones art#glitch productions#glitch#liam vickers animation#amber's kooky art#this took so long#im dying#yeah#i love them#liam when i catch you liam#ok bye
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slight redesign. love her🩻🩸
#mari's art#ok heres everything that changed:#she now has no ears (for reasons i will not explain)#no more midriff!! or any meat in her torso#shoes😙#skeletal hands#greyer skin (for the deader look)#thats p much it ig#Also yay i decided a name for her!!!#marra ebonyx#it was either that or ulia marraigh#ive lost 90% of my study time bc im so fixated on lore#i didnt cover up the writing very well u can still read it if u try#Also nice to see her other post getting attention again!!!!#ok enough yapping bye#original character#my ocs#WAIT LET ME YAP MORE#sooo i was gonna change her pigtails to be horns instead (u can see the previous designs a little there on the side)#bcuz i thought they were too childish looking#but i love them too much so theyre back#aaand basically shes enemies with the grim reaper bcuz shes a necromancer (basically something like that)#OKAY BYE FR
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some aphmau art from like twt uhhhh O(_
#aphmau#aphmau fanart#laurance zvahl#garroth ro'meave#aphmau shalashaska#garrance#laurmau#garmau#hello aphblr *waves*#actually came from twt yeah...#explodes them with mind they are just the silliest trio i love my three little meow mewos#why is tagging actually hard#hand arting#minecraft diaries#almost forgor to tag mcd 💀#ok i think this all i have to tag bye *evaporates*
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swap! swap! swap!
#i. LOVE them in each other’s clothes#they’re everything to meeeee#also ww with pushed back hair? amen amiright#AND VASH WITH HIS HAIR DOWN. AMEN AMIRIGHT#GOD. they are so ideal#vash the stampede#vash#nicholas d. wolfwood#wolfwood#vashwood#trigun#trigun maximum#ok bye
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Thinking about vampires, death, life, and the space they occupy in between
#to be or not to be. that is the question#ty adam for being my model for dramatic vampire moment#musings on the thinkings about:#when to live you are required to hurt others. you must repeatedly ask yourself what the value of your life is#To sleep... perchance to dream...#ah. THERES THE RUB.#ok I actually couldnt come up with too many thoughts. I had a lot more while I was drawing this but I guess I put them in the painting LOL#reading that soliloquy and being like damn this is just like vampires#the reality of course is that the soliloquy is a debate over suicide and ultimately making the choice to live#even if just out of fear of the unknown#and vampires are about dying and then in undeath choosing to continue to live#despite the fear of eternity and loneliness and hurting others#theyre not the same. but like let me thiiink come onnnn I'm allowed to thiiink and have incomplete thoughts#I would have to write like a proper essay about this to organize my thoughts. this is the tags on a tumblr post.#anyways finished episode 79#working on patreon stickers for this month (and next month soon)#and working on book 4. taking a pause from episodes cause I've got 3 weeks of buffer now... UGH#I'm so mad that they changed it. it would have been 5 weeks before but it's fine it's whatever#anyways yeah taking a break from episodes to make my book now!#its good stuff.#and this painting is good stuff#banger after banger from me tbh#this was a little relaxing giving myself a couple hours to muse#it's necessary for my health and I always forget that til I do a painting...#I loved doing the little landscape in the background too I should do that more! I love how plants are just like whatever shape you want#like you can make up any plant you want and not only does that plant PROBABLY exist somewhere#a weirder plant exists somewhere too. so. literally whatever you want#ok bye again for a few days while I get back to work
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and dean winchester thought he was unlovable and didnt deserve happiness he hated himself and thought eveyone would eventually leave him and then a literal fucking angel fell in love with him. like loved him more than anything else in the world.
#and yes people have pointed out that cas has always been fascinated with the world and humans and all of gods creation#but he started Caring about the world and everyone BECAUSE OF DEAN#dont u love it when two people only fall in love with each other in One universe they get no other chances#these r the only version of themselves that said No im gonna do my own thing and they didnt play by the rules they Rebelled#THEY REBELLED FOR EACH OTHERRRRRR ONLY ONCE JUST ONCE#cas literally put everything hed ever believed in on the line for dean#he questioned everything for the first time. he began to doubt#a warrior angel and a son raised as a weapon going against everything theyve ever known for each other#they r so similar theyre both weapons for the man in charge theyve always only followed orders until they mer each other#im aware all of this has been said a billion times by literally everyone i just love them and cant stop thinking or talking about them ever#ok bye <3#supernatural#dean winchester#destiel#spn#castiel#deancas
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