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detective-piplup · 27 days ago

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KFC WHAT WHAT WHAT WHAT WHAT WHAT WHAT WHAT I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS . THE GUYS THAT YOU WERE WRITING. I probably should have. I really should have in retrospect actually. but still WHATTT. peer pressure at its finest

NAVY DIALOGUE WOOOOO I know it’s two lines total but shhh shut up she’s amazing and I get to be a silly about my own girlie okay I’m just glad she’s here WOOOOOO

now for the actual stars of the show and not just me really liking navy anyway BRYANT…. OHHH BRYANT….. his constant description of the sensation like it’s thorns pressing into him is so good and visceral godddddd . He’s still reeling from the everything and the way you describe him dealing with that is great. And also!!! Eeee!!! The silvery light and vibe Elias has!!! Bc he is the moon, of course he shines like it!!! And pffft I know you said you struggled with the dialouge here but trust me it comes off fine. And I am cackling at the accuracy but complete contrast in their reactions to realising they’re crushing. Bryant keeps the conversation going and brushes over it, meanwhile Elias has to run so far he fears the distance is going to kill him.

speaking of which. ELIAS. ELIAS. ELIAS. you are earning your number 1 Elias fan award consistently man, he’s pitch perfect here. I can sense the snufkin influence in how you’re writing him and by god you use it well. Not only in his gentle calmness, bc you’ve shown you can get that right very consistently, but in his brief paragraph abt Sam at the start of his bit!! He and his little son that he initially just wanted to take with him but that’s called Kidnapping and a bad idea bc Elias’ occasional desperate need to be alone does not pair well with a child.

and . the. moment. ohhhh my good oh my god ohh my GOD.

The thought of slashing through this tie, of abandoning Sam especially, was a voice of desperation. Was the cowardice in him resurfacing where he'd thought he'd been completely rid of it.

It was childish, this automatic reaction to chuck out something not going his way.

No matter how he ran, these traitorous thoughts followed him. Some nights, he would dream of tangling his fingers into Bryant's hair, of staring into the man's eyes despite the picturesque sunset around them. Some days, he would have to force himself to keep moving forward, to not follow his feet back to his heart in the castle.

It was his heart. His own heart. He shouldn't have had to wrestle control over his own heart!

Attachment, he decided, especially that of the romantic kind, he was very much better off without. Were it not for his obligations to Sam, he would never return to that castle.

Not returning was just as painful as this snare squeezing his chest. He could rip his heart in half and it would be less agonising than this.

Only when he was certain that the distance would kill him, he wound his way back.

okay yeah ignore the shitty format there do you know how hard it is to add quotes when commenting on TUMBLR . anyway I was seconds from including the first bit of this, where Elias realises and immediately he has to leave bc not only is it a punch to the gut but also seeing Bryant’s love and affection there even if Elias hasn’t realises that’s what is being given so easily, but this bit. was like being kicked in the chest so many times ELIASSASSSSSA AUUUGHGHGHHHH. he’s fully aware that the decision to leave and get as far away as possible is something he’s doing on impulse, out of fear, but also goddd as that second bit goes. it’s the childish need to throw out what’s not going right, something Elias did a lot as a child due to the stress of being seen as so gifted.

but also his thoughts. gay as fuck man, you cannot run from these I fear they will haunt you forever. him forcing himself to not go back despite that being what his heart longs to do?? killling me. you’re killing me. you are using MY OWN CHARACTERS to kill me!!!

and then those entire third and second to last bits of the part I quoted. im going to be genuinely ill how were you worried about getting stuff wrong that was like you crawled into my head and ripped part of Elias out of it and made it into writing ow ow ow ow ow ow OW. Elias is fighting his own heart meanwhile I feel like someone might have just stabbed me in mine. And him believing the distance might kill him?!? therapy bills. right now. riiight now.

back to Bryant….. oh that last bit is so painfully soft. so good and relaxed and they love each other so much even if neither of them can bear to break the comfort of deniability yet. but it flows out of their actions and it cannot be stopped because that love is so intense it drowns them both and all of what they do with each other. and Bryant coming to the realisation that the pining is mutual???? I need to scream GODDDDDDDD. they’re so silly they’re sooo stupid (they have so much else going on that the comfort of not confronting what’s there is needed, neither of them can bear to step outside of that easier solution yet). also you cannot tell me that when Elias said “Beautiful” in regards to the surrounding scenery he wasn’t looking directly at Bryant I know what they are.

anyway. holy shir. still. holy shit. holy shit. I guess I know what I’m doing today (SIGHS AND OPENS UP MY BOOK DOCUMENT). peer pressure at its finest

@detective-piplup WRITE YOUR DAMN BOOK IDK HOW TO DIALOGUE WITH THESE TWO XD

Anyway. I know you were writing these scenes but. I forgor. And also kept thinking about them. Wolf man and Moon sage make me absolutely insane.

Write gets posted here because write your damn book. XD

[This high love that you give to me]

Bryant was not a subtle man. Hard to be such when his emotions were now displayed for full by this new set of ears and the bushy tail behind him.

Navy shrugged him off as he complained. "You've always worn your thoughts on your face. It was kind cute seeing you think you were doing a better job of hiding it."

He growled at her in a playful upset, using that new throat of his to its full advantage. Longer snout, better sounds. More smells to take in as well. As misshapen and marked as he was now, it was kind of a miracle that he could be read so easily even still.

Some part of him had to stay the same, he supposed. Some part of him that certainly wasn't his attraction to others.

It was definitely awkward at first, having to be in such close proximity to the man who had opposed him while he was possessed. Elias was a powerful sage, a worldly traveller, and a decent guy all around. Navy may not have seemed to trust him, but for Bryant, it was mostly guilt which kept him subdued.

"This was all my fault and I'm sorry." He said in admittance as they sat in their shared room.

Elias would be moving on soon enough. He had new places to see, more knowledge to pack into his mind. Elias smiled at him, kind as ever, and said, "You've been making amends. I can't fault you for actions that weren't your own, and neither should you."

His kindness, the way the moon's silvery light seemed to make him glow in the dark of the night, made Bryant forget to breathe for a minute. Made him grip his claws into the bedspread, made him mumble his next words in an attempt to bury his voice. "I'm sorry it got to you, as well. Maybe it wasn't me who performed as the Dark Lord, but I let the curse out."

"It was always going to find its way out." Elias said with such confidence that it seemed easier to believe. "The fact that it fell into your lap was just coincidence, nothing more."

It laid just below his tone; he trusted in the merit of Bryant's character.

If there was one thing Bryant wanted more than anything in that moment, it was to pull that subtlety out from beneath Elias' tongue and lay it as bare as the emotions on Bryant's face.

An odd impulse. One out of completely nowhere. Bryant shook it off, his tail puffing up at the imagined motion, and said in as soft a tone he could manage, "Thank you. I suppose, offering you grace and myself none would be a bit contradictory."

Elias smiled in agreement. "It would be quite unfair."

He smiled, glasses catching the light for a moment. He hid his left eye from view at all times. Lucky, then, that the curse chose that side to carve its mark into. Bryant's was on display the same as his ears and tail, the same as his claws and what fur couldn't be hidden beneath his clothes. It was one thing they were matched in where they were incompatible otherwise.

Had Bryant not had this moment of weakness, desperate to help his sister and himself out of their dead ends, he may never have crossed paths with this silver light of a man. He wouldn't have met Sam, either, and develop this strange attachment to the plush child.

Mostly, though, he was caught by this oddly thorny sensation in his chest. He owed this man a great deal, from helping pull that curse out of him to continuing to treat him as an equal. Bryant should have been shunned for releasing such mayhem into their strange corner of the cosmos, yet he was only met with open hands and a willingness for him to prove himself worthy of them. At its centre was this sage whom he couldn't quite get a read on.

Elias was beautiful, though. Bryant had no qualms in that observation.

It continued to compound, these small moments. Despite the snarl of needles twisting around his heart, poking into it at inopportune moments, Bryant never once let these sharper instincts show. He was polite to Elias, perhaps a touch too open, and Elias was kind in turn. That kindness continued to make Navy unwilling to trust him.

("He has to want something." She argued.

Bryant would argue right back, "What would we be able to give him he can't just find from his travels?"

It never satisfied her, but she wouldn't keep pressing the issue. And Bryant wondered why he would continually defend this sage's intentions when he had no idea of them himself.)

The man's unnatural though faint glow of silver bolstered hers and Bryant's own hesitance around him. It never made him wish to speak barbs to him, however. Snark, yes. A flippant roll of his eyes here, a wave of his hand in dismissal there, but never anything to pierce that shield of softness Elias seemed to radiate.

"I don't envy you that amount of responsibility." Elias said in response to all of Bryant's complaints.

They sat together at their current inn's table in the middle of the night. Elias was restless and Bryant couldn't settle his grumbling enough to sleep, so here they were, running into one another yet again. Like magnets fated to slam together no matter what. Like the universe itself was pushing them towards one another. Bryant sighed, clawing a hand through his hair and flattening his ears. At least not knocking against them this time. "Someone has to maintain that castle, I guess. No one else wants to, so I'm the best bet. Somehow."

"You'll be a fine King." Elias smiled at him, a sight which continually punched the air out of Bryant and made him aware of just how ensnared in thorns his chest was. "You have a kind hand with those like Sam and a fair hand when it comes to those like your sister. That's better than most, so I'm certain you've nothing to worry about."

"Besides the responsibility." Bryant reminded him.

"Yes, besides that."

Elias giggled into his hand and those thorns squeezed against Bryant's chest. Their piercing into his heart finally helped this unfamiliar sensation click right into place, as he stared at Elias and could think of nothing but how beautiful the man was, how this silver light about him dragged Bryant further away from the surface and air he needed to breathe.

There was a reason these things were called crushes.

There was a reason Bryant wished to dig those new claws into his chest and unfurl the many thorns pressing uncomfortably at his heart.

It wasn't so much a booming realisation as it was a gentle click. A final piece fitted into place to reveal the whole puzzle's picture. Bryant was taken by the sight of Elias smiling, of the man having fun in their conversation, and the quietness surrounding them never once faltered.

He hadn't known he could be attracted to another man.

He hadn't known he could be attracted to anyone, if he was being honest.

"Did you have any plans on when you'll be heading out again on your travels?" Bryant asked, stepping over that moment as lightly as he could. No need to jostle anything further. "Thank you again for accompanying us for now, by the way."

"I owe it to Sam to make sure he's taken care of." Elias said, voice smooth as he glanced towards the stairs leading up to the rooms. Dropping off each of Sam's friends in their respective homes was exhausting, but it had its own sort of charm. The little plush child had his own way of worming himself into the hearts of all he came across. "As for plans, I've nothing set in stone. Perhaps I'll stick around just long enough to watch your coronation."

"Ugh, please don't." Bryant grimaced at the thought, ears flattening on his head.

Laughter sparkles behind Elias' eye, though he was too polite to let it slip through. "That bad of a thought, is it?"

"Kinda, yeah." Bryant shook out his head, forcing his ears to stand upright once more. "You're right about the responsibility. But better to maintain the space than let it get occupied by something dark like that again."

"Yes, that is indeed for the best."

Elias smiled at him once more, this one a bit less gentle. This man has power, was a great sage, after all. They shared a scar from how badly things had gone when darkness lorded over that castle. They both knew far too intimately how helpless they could be when forced to watch their hands bring ruin to the worlds.

There was no reason for a travelled, worldly man with silver all but glowing out of him to find Bryant as anything else besides someone to pity.

Just another person to meet on his travels. Another soul assisted, another name to forget as the years passed and his travels continued.

Which was fine. It was surprising how well Bryant took that thought. The same sort of quiet realisation which led him to these thorns eased their pressure on his heart.

They called them crushes for a reason, he supposed.

He didn't hide it away, though. How could he when he was mostly incapable of any form of subtlety? He never admitted it outright, never let himself confess even in confidence, but he never stayed his hand or words when it hit him.

He wanted to pull laughter from this man, and so he did his best to make Elias laugh. He wished to spend time in the man's orbit, so he offered a place to stay whenever Elias came to check on Sam. To provide became its own act of expressing this blood which spilled from him with no intention of stoppering it.

It took time for him to start calling it love. Thorns curled around his heart, pressing against it with every breath he took, of course that couldn't be love. Not right away.

But it was.

It very much was.

There was nothing else to do about it than hope Elias could forgive him once more.

Attachment was not a thing Elias usually cared for. He could grow attached to others, was used to others growing attached to him, but severing those ties was inevitable, always. He liked to travel, after all. It was hard to keep in contact when he was always moving, when he lost those he did care for more often than not simply to distance and time.

Sam was very much not that. Sam was special and Elias desired nothing more than to take this plush child along with him so that they wouldn't have to part.

This was, however, an insane impulse. And could be considered kidnapping in the wrong light. So Elias simply made sure to continue visiting the child whenever his feet grew too weary of the distance and wound him back towards his friend.

Sam's choice of residence was the fully refurbished castle. The one where Bryant also made his home.

Bryant, whom Elias wasn't so sure he was as free from as he would have liked.

The man was, in a word, charming. Around him, Elias found himself lowering his walls, letting the man make him smile and laugh as they shared conversation. The added ears and tail which marked his transgression made his expressions rather open, hard to miss, and it was endlessly endearing. Despite all his claws and teeth which might ward many off, this sharpness drew Elias towards him.

It helped that Sam adored the man as much as he was attached to Elias. Often, Elias would see the child doodling the three of them together, an understanding of his circumstances Elias couldn't fault him for. He and Bryant did technically share custody of him, strange as it was to think of in that way.

Friendship seemed an incorrect label by this point. It was the best Elias had, however, and so he'd continue holding onto it.

Navy had asked him what he wanted with Bryant when they first met. Elias hadn't understood her meaning then. Now, it was a nagging which grew in the back of his mind the more he spent time with the man.

Bryant always welcomed him with a smile, with a generosity that seemed unbefitting of his nature. It was infectious, that smile of his. Elias couldn't help smiling in return, couldn't help smiling even now despite only thinking about it.

Sometimes it came unbidden, this desire to run his hands through Bryant's hair or brush the fur of his tail. More than once, he caught himself wishing to grab Bryant's arm as they walked alongside each other down the halls, talking about anything and everything. Allowing himself some tactile teasing, while fun, would be a step too far, however. Would drop that pretense of friendship and launch him into something he wasn't sure he was ready to confront.

Unfortunately, once something became too obvious to ignore, it was hard to shove it back into its corner.

All it took was one time, just once, as he stared at Bryant beside him, sitting on one of the castle's balconies. Just once, letting his mind slip and imagining what it would be like to kiss this man.

Kiss him. Elias wanted to kiss him.

Elias couldn't just call this friendship anymore.

He stood from the bench, mind screaming, but managed to keep his tone calm. "I think it's time I get back to my travels."

Bryant stood as well, confused. "Right now?"

He was cute like this, tilting his head just enough to get his ears angled. Elias said in confirmation, "Yes. Right now."

He pivoted quickly and strode back inside, heading directly for his room. Bryant scrambled to catch up with him, his ears drooping atop his head. "Well. Do you need any more supplies before you do? Can I help get you anything?"

"I have what I need, thank you."

Being terse with the man wasn't ideal, but Elias needed to get out. He had to run until he could scream. Bryant didn't follow him inside his room, waiting just outside as he packed his things as neatly as he could. "Safe travels, then. Sam should be in the dining hall, since it's nearly time to eat."

Sam. Right. Elias couldn't leave without wishing the child well. When Elias turned to thank him once more, he was startled by the expression on Bryant's face.

Mourning. Wistful. The man would truly miss him.

As if Elias ever had any doubts of that.

It was like seeing him in brand new light, a completely new context helping him pick up on every detail. His beauty, his softness, his claws and sharp nature; everything about him was suddenly too much.

He wasn't even trying to dissuade Elias from leaving. He understood Elias better than most, another point ringing alongside this awful, awful realisation.

"Take care, Bryant." He said, unwilling to leave it unsaid.

Bryant smiled at him, gentle and kind and wonderful, and Elias hurried on his way. The only stop he made was to wish Sam well, then he was out of this castle, out of this place, free to grapple with this sudden shift throwing him off balance.

He wasn't ready to love.

He wasn't ready to settle, to place roots, to anchor himself more than he was all ready.

He wasn't ready to bare himself, to pry open his chest and allow anyone else inside such an uncompromising place.

Oh, how he wished he could take this thought and send it careening far past the stars. How he wished he could quash this new bloom, could strangle it before it could wrap its thorns around his heart.

But it was too late for that. It was far too late to tear himself away from these desires. It may have made its presence known in a pouncing realisation, but it was a wave which had been growing this whole while. The full weight of it crashing down on him all at once was enough to drive him to flee far past his usual straying. It was enough to make him tear himself away from all that warmth and pretend like he could be fine on his own.

Being alone wasn't foreign to him. He'd had friends, mentors who helped him carve out his identity, his own life. He was well aware of the many hands he'd held as he worked to stand proudly on his own feet. Being called a Great Sage didn't come from nothing, after all.

The thought of slashing through this tie, of abandoning Sam especially, was a voice of desperation. Was the cowardice in him resurfacing where he'd thought he'd been completely rid of it.

It was childish, this automatic reaction to chuck out something not going his way.

It was his heart. His own heart. He shouldn't have had to wrestle control over his own heart!

Attachment, he decided, especially that of the romantic kind, he was very much better off without. Were it not for his obligations to Sam, he would never return to that castle.

Not returning was just as painful as this snare squeezing his chest. He could rip his heart in half and it would be less agonising than this.

Only when he was certain that the distance would kill him, he wound his way back. He was nervous, of course. How could he manage now that this truth was raw in his breast? Still, he couldn't shy away any longer. He returned to Bryant's castle, returned to his Sam. Nothing else pulled his feet to this place besides the sackling. Nothing else made him run from it, either.

Bryant opened the door for him, grinning as usual with an exuberant, "Hey, come on in. Sam'll be happy to see you."

His teeth were sharp. Elias was losing this battle. "You're happy to see me, too, aren't you?" He asked in a tease. In a flirt.

Bryant laughed, good natured and willing to side step Elias' cue. "I'm always happy to see you. Come in, we're about to eat."

He motioned for Elias to follow with a nod, tail wagging behind him. Displaying how pleased he was without compromise. Elias thought it would be easier, going off and telling himself that this was just a lapse in his judgement. Being back, however, thrust him right back into that drowning sensation.

There was no treading these waters. There was no surfacing after sinking to the depths he had.

It was embarrassing, but he couldn't lie to himself about this. He had to take in a gulp of air, the only breath he was going to get, and then swim towards the darkness and depths. He followed Bryant inside, knocking against his shoulder in an admission of his desire for this man's touch.

Bryant grinned at him, radiating so much light that it was near blinding to look at. There was no way Elias could turn away from him again.

Perhaps he could learn to live with this pressure in his chest.

He said it as easily as breathing.

"Take care on your travels."

He loved him.

"Is it that late all ready? Sorry, seems we got carried away again."

He loved him.

"Don't be shy about eating well while you're here. I know it's hard to get a decent meal while you're travelling sometimes, so. We're here to provide whatever comfort we can while you're here."

He loved him, he loved him, he loved him.

Bryant didn't mean for it to drip so honey thick from his words like that. He simply wanted to care for Elias while the man was here, wanted to spend time with him and offer him a warm place to lay. Though much less travelled than the sage, Bryant knew how difficult it was to scrape resources together. Knew what it took to look after more than just himself. He did his best not to overstep, not to treat Elias as if he couldn't care for himself. The fact that Elias would accept all his acts of gentleness, he supposed, was proof enough that he had to be doing a good enough job at it.

The fact that Elias, in turn, would reciprocate some of this softness, only heightened that elation dancing in his heart.

A gentle touch on his shoulder. "Bryant, did you get enough rest?"

A light brush against his back. "You should go eat. I'll handle things here."

A tug on his arm. "Let's find somewhere quieter, okay?"

He loved him, he loved him, he loved him.

As easily as breathing. As mesmerising as the churning of a waterfall.

Bryant didn't want to read too much into it, didn't want to simply assume. Elias simply was his friend. His dear friend whom he shared their little Sam with, but a friend nonetheless.

This swirling melody of affection tangled around them long before Bryant had recognised it. Was comfortably the only thing he could hear too often as he spent time with his friend.

It made for the perfect accompaniment as Bryant suggested one mild evening, "The view of the sky must be dazzling right now."

He offered his hand towards his friend, who accepted without any hesitation. "I know just where we should view it, then."

Push and pull. Catch and reel in.

Bryant could think of no better dance to partake in.

They slipped out of the castle together and walked into the wilderness surrounding it. Elias never let go of Bryant's hand and Bryant walked at his side, navigating the undergrowth with ease. He inhaled the deep and rich scent of the trees, the night, and the chill in the air. "Yeah. Much better out here all ready."

"Less overwhelming things, for sure." Elias agreed.

Bryant relaxed his shoulders, tail loose behind him. It was a full moon in the sky, shining its silvery light down on them, and gave Elias a brighter glow than he normally held. The moonlight suited him. He was radiant under its light. Bryant couldn't shy away from the sight even if he wanted to.

This was part of their dance, however. Never stepping too close, always leaving the nature of this tie ambiguous.

He didn't take any other action besides giving Elias' hand a gentle squeeze.

Elias reciprocated, as he had been doing more and more.

They reached a break in the trees, arriving at the shores of the lake. Bryant settled instantly into a spot on the dirt, pulling Elias down beside him. They sat a little too close, pressing into one another's side, and stared out into the gentle ripples across the lake's dark surface. The reflection of the moon splayed across the waters wasn't bright enough to sting and warbled with every ripple, a hypnotising display.

Resting his head on Elias's shoulder, Bryant said in a low murmur, "It's beautiful, huh?"

"Absolutely."

The smile was evident in Elias' equally soft tone. He rested his head against Bryant's, continuing to hold onto Bryant's hand as well.

He loved him.

"Let me know if you get too cold."

He loved him.

"Would've been nice if we brought a blanket, but. I guess, I have my cape."

He loved him.

Elias laughed, an absolutely breathtaking noise in the relative quiet of the night.

"You're keeping me warm as it is, but I'll let you know."

He loved him.

The message being repeated back to him was startling. He'd been coating it in every word, every action, not really meaning to be overbearing but needing some sort of outlet to that honey pouring from his mouth. He hadn't wanted to read into it on Elias' part, yet the echo was difficult to miss when it was repeated so blatantly right back at him.

He loved him.

They were in agreement.

He loved him.

It wasn't just in Bryant's head.

He loved him.

… But confirming it was a bit too terrifying a thought for the moment, so Bryant closed his eyes and relaxed in his friend's presence.

It was an added step to their dance around one another. They could spin around this truth they both recognised, could pepper their mutual affections against each other with reckless abandon, but always separated in the end. Never spoken outright, never confirmed for the fear that it would shatter this comfortable deniability between them.

He knew Elias loved him. Elias knew he loved him.

They said it as easy as breathing in every other way besides those words.

For a traveller as steady as the moon and a wolf made reluctant king, that was enough for now.

#Bryant Willis #Elias Palm #Birdsong #Long post #FAVE #ultra fave #I am totally normal about friend ocs I promise #<- yeah totally. tooootally. this is the behaviour of a normal man #anyway this was a treat to wake up to. tysm. this has made my day and also ow ky HEART

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heavenpierceher · 3 years ago

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esoteric friendships that i’m certain exist in mtmte but we just don’t see them:

rodimus and tailgate have a big brother/little brother style relationship. like in the “rodimus is a rowdy jackass” way but also he allows himself to express like 0.004% more genuine affection towards tg than other people because i mean cmon look at the little guy. the symbiotic return that tailgate receives in this relationship is being carried places like a purse dogy

swerve and cyclonus rewatching 80s slasher films “why does tailgate call you babygirl” “how about we stop talking for a little while”

cyclonus and ratchet’s mean old crotchety bastard solidarity. in the back of the club arms folded cuz i don’t agree with the music selection

tailgate and first aid will occasionally meet up just to sort of go “ohhhh my gooooddddd oh my fucking GOOOODDDDDD OHHH my GODDDDDD FUUUUUCKKK oh my gooodddddddddd” at each other. they both know exactly what they mean but it’s impenetrable to anyone else

drift is operating under the delusion that he can fix whirl (platonic). whirl is having a GREAT time fucking with his head by pretending to have spectralist visions that entail him getting free drinks

skids is surprisingly very open to being climbed on physically. another free ride for tailgate

chromedome and ratchet’s “oh my god my husband is so fucking exhausting oh my god” solidarity

speaking of which, rewind and tailgate bond over their mutual struggle to unravel their husband’s 27 million emotional firewalls and also watch early 90′s anime reruns

swerve and whirl argue with each other like letterboxd users on twitter. there’s a lot of screaming but trust them it’s a bonding exercise

chromedome and skids have occasional “i have done unspeakable things. we are not going to acknowledge this and instead i will watch you play fallout 4 in total silence” meetings. they both benefit from this experience somehow

magnus and ratchet’s mean old crotchety bastard “oh my god all of you people are fucking insane oh my god” solidarity

putting rodimus and swerve in the same room is an occupational hazard (positive connotation). they are known to escalate games as minor as uno into ship-spanning wagers, usually involving other people’s stuff. rodimus once punched a hole through a wall over wii sports

fortmax and the minibots are bestieeeesssss :3 (they help her forget about The Everything and she lets them be like 50 feet tall)

once drift and cyclonus get over the whole “sorry i played bad cop with you in a misguided attempt to impress the guy crushing on me” thing they like to practice swords with each other. drift always offers to get him a drink afterwards and cyclonus is always like “no” and then shows up an hour later and doesn’t talk to anyone but he’s still there so that counts

tailgate and drift rewatching jidaigeki movies “why does ratchet call you babygirl” “how about we stop talking for a little while”

tailgate and nautica, in a moment of drunken unfiltered weakness, discover that they both have the same sort of “i feel like no one takes me seriously and my emotional openness is offputting to people when all i want is to make genuine emotional connections with others and also when left alone i have a tendency to spiral from feeling useless and like people are only tolerating my presence and don’t actually care about me as a person and my self doubt is tearing me apart internally” thing going on

she also likes carrying him around

everyone likes carrying tailgate around

#mtmte #maccadam #i CANNOT tag all these characters #cygate #dratchet #meta #f #tf #op

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godlyakechi · 3 years ago

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listening to the new set it off album im freaking outtttttt oh my goddddddddddddd ohhhh my godddddd ohhhhh ohhh ohohohohoho!!!! anyways pictures of the gowrl you know everything about and passing all questionable behaviors as just a joke!...ebang...

idk i just wanted to sketch her really quick...it turned out cute. honestly i love the Y/N in SDS she's so cute!!! im in love. idk if i ever mentioned this but i based her design off of what maskcover said she imagined y/n looked like like! brown hair blue eyes long skirt it's definitely not what she probably had in mind but this is what i interpreted from it.

#MC #y/n #sds #maskcover

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fnaf3 · 3 years ago

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ohhhh my godddddd nothing will ever be okay until i can have vast amounts of plastic surgery and i'm unable to feel any emotion ohhhh to be pumped full of silicone and blonde and white and skinny instead of being this disgusting mass of flesh ohhh to be surrounded by people who love me for me for my looks and nothing else so i don't have to worry about my personality being the problem ever ohhh to just shed all of this and be perfect and an idol and 987rwe0989tsdf78gyukwe8f7hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh i'm gonna literally kill my self

#negative #minors dni #t

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tfw-no-tennis · 4 years ago

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mtmte liveblog issue 22

oooh man, its time to feel some EMOTIONS!

I'm BACK after a hiatus, which was due in part to me getting my 1st dose of the covid vaccine! woohoo!

anyways, starting here w/issue 22....we have a great cover w/thunderclash, the legend himself

oof. the covers made me forget how much I don't like the art this issue...I hate to be mean to the artists but this art style just isn't doin it for me chief

god I love this issue though. the framing device of rewind’s movie is so so fantastic

tailgate listing off all his fake awards/accomplishments....ily

rodimus my boy, you're a prime in my heart

the ‘not a decepticon’ label for cyclonus is so much hvbhkjfbskjf

I literally wanna comment on every single panel bc I love all the characters so much but then id be here forever...that being said whirl ily sm

hvbjdfbhsfjhdfshja BRAINSTORM ‘according to perceptor - ships genius’ hvhdkjhbfhjs ily dumb gay idiot

and then the cut to perceptor after brainstorm like, blew up his lab vjbkdsfnbksjf dude

GODDDDDD drift ‘your name...defines you. it’s your soul expressed in syllables. hm? oh, yes, sorry. it’s drift.’ GOD he’s so fucking funny. I love early story hippy drift

god I cant stop thinking about how good this whole issue would be as an animated show...like, specifically rewinds film, it would be SO FUCKING GOOOOOOD mtmte show WHEN

rewiiiiind ;_; I fuckgin love rewind god. fellow video editing enthusiast....

ohhhh rodimus being embarrassed about his big speech at the beginning of mtmte....my boy I love u so much

gjhnbgehjsrkfbjksf magnus being suspicious of rewind oh my god. magnus ily but please, look at the lil guy, he’s a good boy, most of the time

the fuckgin footage that magnus removed hbvhakjbfhskf god. wasn't that intended to be footage of magnus dancing? I love him

minibot squad.....

and here it begins, the mystery stick rung question...

poor rung oh my god he’s just trying to polish his lil spaceship and people r throwing shit at him. taking Ls as per usual it seems

hand grenade tag hvbfjksdnfbkjdf love that callback

noooo rungs ship :(

magnus’s censorship vhbhadkjfhdbhjsakjhfn

oh man I forgot about how they met that race of Transformers But More

the one-upsmanship hbvkajsbehfjks

whirrrrrl lmao I love whirl sm

goddddd whirl just killing that other alien and ending the 16 million yr long civil war bvkjsdbfhjjkafs so fucking much

oh god oh god the ‘are you happy’ page, I'm not emotionally equipped to handle this like, ever

but I will say I feel like it would be EVEN MORE oof if it were milne or someone drawing it bc I feel like this art style takes away from some of the impact bc the expressions aren't really that...expressive? idk how to put it

anyways. every single answer destroys me!!! like even the happy ones, like chromedome and rewind and tailgate - well, in present time, none of those three are doing so hot, so that makes this just hurt

and rung....that is so fucking depressing. jesus. this guy is so fuckng sad, somebody get him a friend stat

and swerve...ouch. this readthru I've really noticed how much early-mtmte swerve is not-so-subtly like, crying out for help bc he’s so alone and shit. jesus

also brainstorms response is just plain ole sad w/context, but at this point in the story without context, it just seems very foreboding lmao. I'm realizing this readthru that brainstorm is very sketchy and ominous in a particular ‘is he evil?’ mad scientist sorta way in early mtmte

and then everyone else is also just so OOF in their own unique sad ways, but I think the worst out of everyone is drift....GODDDDDD. especially considering that at this point in the story, drift is this kinda goofy hippy guy, so seeing him just sit there with his face in his hand, not even answering the question...AND knowing that shortly after this he’ll end up banished...IT FUCKING HURTS M8!

meanwhile, the more upbeat ‘quest to see rungs alt mode’ continues...with an ‘alt mode party’ vhbadkjsdfnabskjf it looks so silly with a bunch of cars just sitting around a table lmao

I cant even tell who everyone is bc they so rarely turn into cars n shit lmaoooooo

rodimus with the bucket on his head hbvhakjbfskjf I CANT

everyone’s reactions to thunderclash...i fucking love it

the fact that TAILGATE doesn't hate him, even though we’ve seen that tailgate tends to dislike people who are universally liked/who have achieved a lot of impressive things

rodimus you petty thot vbdkjbfdjhsakjdf ily

RODIMUS IS SO FUNNYYYYYY ‘I'm not making all these sacrifices and leading these guys into battle and being inspirational - I'm not doing that because it makes me look good’ RODIMUS VBHSKJDFNBKSJF

thunderclash talking about magnus’s article on typefaces....hdbksjfsdbkjgfb bro

AND THEN MAGNUS HUGS HIM....HGBSKJFDSHFKD I CANT

POOR DRIFT bvhajkdfbhjkjsfd rodimus saying he ‘rehabilitated him’ oh my god

the whole spectralism thing...im sorry I cant get over how funny all this is vbakdjfbksjf thunderclash rlly b out here charming rodimus’s entire crew

and then ratchet comes in, calling tc ‘thunders,’ and tc immediately notices ratchets new hands (somehow) hvbkjfhbskjf truly amazing

it cracks me up that rodimus is all 😒😒 at thunderclash, even though as we come to find out, tc really IS That Perfect, and him complimenting rodimus isn't sarcasm at all lmao

AND THEYRE LOOKING FOR THE KNIGHTS OF CYBERTRON TOO HVSDHFJBSHKHDFJS OF COURSE

the vis vitalis being a life support machine spaceship is a really cool concept tho

‘rescuing some orphans from an exploding sun’ I fucking cant

evil guy: [holds a gun to thunderclash’s head]

rodimus: :D finally something doesn't go his way!

he’s so petty I’m..........dkdjhfdabhduifadijgl

and its the aliens from earlier! oooh

GODDD I forgot that swerve used rung in mystery stick mode to SCHWACK the guy

rung casually dropping the fact that the functionists like, experimented on him...there's a lot of implications there, and that'll certainly be explored more later...

the fact that his ID card says ‘rong’ hvbhjakhdsbfakhsjfn

oughufadkfujbsfk the circle of light throwing wrenches n shit at skids...guys cmon vbhsdjkfnslfd

the circle of light is like ‘wtf you all have trauma and a bunch of weird unhealthy coping mechanisms this is wack byeeeee’ lmao

skids calling the lost light his home is rlly sweet tho

cant believe the religious space hippy cult is being so rude about a film made by a guy who died like a week ago. unreal

cd finally figured out how to make the pffft sound, good for him

AUGHHHHH the fact that rewind used ‘little victories’ as the title of the film and that's something that chromedome said in the video ;_; I'm fucking inconsolable

rodimus, despite his obvious posturing for the camera during the whole issue, comes off as surprisingly genuine when he says that he hasn't thought about his own future much, but wants the crew to have a happy ending....im gonna cry

‘who knows what's around the corner?’ tailgate, PLEASE don't say that, oh my god,

OUGHHHH GROUP SHOT

OHHH mannnnNNNNN i love this issue SO MUCH. what a good fun emotional rollercoaster wrap-up to mtmte s1. god.

like, this issue has it all - humor, drama, crippling sadness, intrigue, worldbuilding...it’s so excellent

and getting to see rewind again hurts so bad but also I love him

ok quick mtmte s1 retrospective...god s1 is so fucking good. I'm gonna have to read more to say which chunk of mtmte I liked best but s1 is so fucking excellent that it might be my favorite. though its hard to pick bc there's so much good stuff later on too...whatever, the point is s1 is so so good

the plotlines and characters are fucking stellar. like I cant even believe how well Everything works, its very impressive. I cant really think of anything major that made me go ‘yeah could've done without that plotline/character’

I love how dedicated jro is to connecting everything. I've mentioned it before but basically every single moment in the series has payoff - what you initially think is just a funny moment, or a fluffy character establishment bit, ends up ALSO being an important plot point later, in some way

an example would be here w/rung and his alt mode - it just seems like a fun little B-plot for this issue, and seems to pretty neatly conclude with the reveal that rung was eventually classified as an ‘ornament’ (lmao)...but we later on get to see a lot more about this, both here and in the functionist universe

and like, stuff like tailgate’s autobot lessons w/magnus - at first that can be seen as purely character establishment stuff, showing that magnus is a strict rule-lover and tg is a loveable try-hard good boy - but that becomes plot relevant in remain in light, with tailgate saving the day due to his knowledge of the autobot code (and its also character relevant, with magnus’s arc in remain in light).

and I know this is like. a normal regular thing in writing, but I'm just very impressed about how cleanly jro pulls it off, and how many things he’s juggling at once, especially in early mtmte - it’s very ambitious!

and we gotta remember, this is a comic book. I've read a lot of comic books, and the quality is all over the place. a lot of writers bite off more than they can chew, and the story ends up kinda scattered as a result.

another thing I see a lot in franchise writing like this is a lack of strong early character establishing due to the author assuming the readers are at least somewhat familiar with the characters already - which can be totally fair depending on where it is in the continuity, but other times it can come off as lazy

in mtmte, the cast is extremely well fleshed out, and not only that, the cast itself is unique in that there are a lot of relative unknowns (franchise-wise) - which I think was an absolutely brilliant move, because then jro was able to essentially create The Definitive Version of these characters - characters like swerve, brainstorm, chromedome, rewind, tailgate...mtmte is their baseline characterization, because they haven't really appeared in much else

this also allows for deviation from the franchise norms - again, a comic book classic is good writing being stifled by a need to stick to a certain status quo regard the characters, the world, the powers, relationships, etc

(I've mostly read DC comics, and some marvel, so I'm thinking superheroes w/all these comic comparisons)

so mtmte had a good recipe for genuine creativity in that the characters were relative unknowns, the plot was basically ‘space road trip,’ the status quo of ‘autobot vs decepticon war’ had been demolished throughout the entire franchise...so jro was able to take all that and run, and it turned out so fantastic

and luckily it isn't over yet! so many comics suffer from premature cancellation...and sadly mtmte/ll isn't exempt from this, as we’ll see later, but I've seen some awful ones, where comics are forced to wrap up in like 2 issues while in the middle of an arc. yikes.

but another comic staple...one of my least favorite things about comics books in general...something that was basically responsible for driving me away from comics after reading a bunch...the dreaded crossover event

yep, even mtmte isn't immune to this unfortunate plague on the comic industry. crossover events are the absolute worst, and I'm saying this as somebody who adores crossovers (in concept more than execution usually). they SHOULD be my favorite, but unfortunately they p much always completely suck

they're essentially a ploy to get you to read the other ongoing titles, but they usually only serve to bog down whatever story you're reading to the point where you don't even wanna read that one anymore, let alone read all the other ongoings. at least, that’s been my experience

it doesn't help that reading orders tend to be hard to find/keep track of, and that you need to go read the other series to know what's going on. I just hate it, like, I came here to read THIS series, I don't want a bunch of other series showing up too - even if I was reading two series, I wouldn't want them crossed over, because they're separate stories! augh!

I'm totally losing my focus here but my point is...crossover events suck, and mtmte unfortunately is involved in one. I have not read dark cybertron, and I'm not about to. I've heard nothing but bad things so I have no desire to inflict that upon myself

soooo ill be reading through the tfwiki articles for those issues to give myself a better understanding of what went on - which is more than I've ever done in the past - and maybe ill even make a single post summarizing my thoughts on what I read in the wiki, lmao

but yea ill be skipping to the mtmte s2 stuff next

phew ok I'm super tired, my vision keeps blurring out and stuff lmao. its time for bed, I probably have more thoughts but ill save them for later. for now...peace out!

#lj rereads mtmte

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renee-writer · 6 years ago

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Secrets We Keep Chapter 48 Discovery

Quite Explicit

.She falls asleep as relaxed as she has ever been and wakes up, sometime in the dark of the night, to the feel of her kissing the back of her shoulder as her hands explore her breasts.

"Ohh!" She groans out as her nipples tighten under her ministrations.

"I canna keep my hands off of ye. I woke up wanting." And she remembers. She had release but Rue didn't. She turns and lets her lips roam down Rue's body. She finds her nipples as erect as her own. She draws one deeply in.

"Ohhhh holy hell. Just like that!" She holds her head in place as Lamb suckles hard. She groans out as Lamb's hand travel down her body. She gasps when it finds her sex. She starts to stroke, striving to mimic what Rue had did for her.

"Yes, yes, yes!" She cries out as Lamb finds her clit and starts to work it. Her hungry mouth switches to the other nipple. "Oh my god! I am going to cum!" She cries and then does, arching her body up and her vagina contracts around Lamb's finger.

"Better?" Lamb asks, lifting from her breast after on final lick.

"Oh yah. Now for ye. I want to try something." She kisses her first and then works her way down, suckling her breasts and then kissing and licking on her lower chest and belly. "I want to taste ye. I want to put my tongue in your vag and thrust, to feel yer clit bud under my mouth."

"Pleass," a completely turned on Lamb begs,"pleass!" Rue smiles as she works her way down. She kisses her thighs open, and then opens her outer lips with her hands. She is tentative, at first. Not wanting to do something that would hurt her or make her uncomfortable. But, her groans, moans, and gasping hands, spur her own. Her name, whispered and then shouted, keep her tongue stroking. And her taste, growing sweeter as she probed deeper, keeps her exploring.

"Yes! Yes! Ohhh Bloody! I....oh godddddd!' It is earthshaking, her orgasm. It turns her legs to jello, causes every blood vessel in her body to open and suck in the dopemin filled blood, hardens her nipples to an almost painful degree, and losens her hips and vagina. She can't breath and her heart feels like it is leaving her chest. It is glorious.

"I will," deep breath," get you next."

#my writing #jamie and claire #outlander fanfic #cannon divergence #secrets we keep #the sub and dom one #rue and lamb #discovery #quite explict

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harryfeatgaga · 6 years ago

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I feel like he'd start phone sex off all loving 'miss you so much baby. miss the sound of your voice and your laugh' and it'd slowly change to 'miss you playing with my hair and you giggling when i kiss that spot under your left ear' then morph to 'miss the feel of you sat in my lap' and then to 'miss feeling the way your thighs shake when i fuck you just right' and 'miss the way you moan my name' and you moan it the way he likes and he goes 'yea' jus' like tha'"

OHHHH MY FUCKING GOD YES YES YESSSSSS like okay maybe he was calling to have phone sex but was gonna see if you were in the mood like feel it out cause maybe its late for you so he starts saying miss you so much baby cant wait to see you and saying all those things and then when hes like miss feeling you baby and your like ohhh so its that kind of call huh styles and hes like only if you want too baby just miss you so much miss being with you and loving on you AND OHHHHHHHH GODDDDDD

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theabominableblogger · 6 years ago

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Rewatching “Gotham” S3E14

On this blog, we stan one kickass butler. And how much he loves his boy

As said before, the rest of these reaction posts I’ll be uploading are not chronological order. They’re like that because A) college and B) more college.

My sister watched it with me (as well as the other episodes left in my epic “Gotham” reaction series) so my comments will be in bold, and hers will be in regular font. Author’s notes courtesy of me will be bolded and italicized.

AN: I managed to record our reactions to this episode and hopefully I can transcribe what I said into this post.

*gasps as a grenade gets thrown into the precinct*

Jesus God!

Ohhhhh my gosh!

*both freak out over the opening titles*

Molotov cocktails- bet you can’t have just one.

Meanwhile Jeremiah’s like “Eh. Bazooka.” *chuckles*

You are walking straight into a trap, Oswald.

*Ed walks in* I bet you’re wondering why I’ve brought you all here today...

Oswald has like freaking umbrella cufflinks, did you notice that?

*chuckles*

“Oh, you [Ed] escaped.” Nooo....

*jaw drops as Ed shoots Oswald’s men*

*shook*

“Just wondering if I [Ed] was gonna have to reload.” Jesus God.

“...what’s happening...” ‘What’s happening?’ He’s been playing you for a sap!

...Like the cheap kazoo you are.

*starts pretending to play “Amazing Grace” on the kazoo*

*claps hands for each word* JUSTICE FOR ISABELLA, I swear!

*claps hands* Yes!

“Isabella was my everything, and you [Oswald] took her from me.” [Ed] YOU MET HER [Isabella] LIKE A DAY AGO!

*laughs* You met her in like a span of a day!

*claps hands* She still deserves better!

I know! I still think she’s a useless character though.

I don’t care! She deserved better!

“You [Oswald] still have your life. But that ends tonight!” *starts singing “Tonight” from “West Side Story” without trying to giggle*

*chuckles* You weren’t kidding about the random songs.

Seriously, I do it all the time!

Court of Owls!

The only thing I will never find plausible about the Court of Owls is this idea of “Oh, they’ve been ruling over Gotham from the shadows this whole time,” bullshit.

*both do rising spooky hands*

OK though, I don’t know her name, they don’t give her a name, but she’s like the best. You see her in previous episodes, she’s like the secretary. Girl, you rule!

*puts hands together* Well, I’m gonna give her a name. Because in the 66 series, Gordon’s secretary is named Bonnie.

Bonnie! Ooh, I like that name.

You never actually see Bonnie, you just hear her on the intercom.

“Meanwhile, Cobblepot’s MIA. You call down to City Hall, and literally no one’s in charge. Although that might actually be good news.” *both laugh*

*giggles* They capitalized “dumpster” on the [close captioning on Netflix]

*waves hands in air in imaginary rainbow* DUMPster!

“He’s [Jerome] not one to miss out on the fun, so what does he want?” “A puppy?!?” *laughs*

“[Oswald] You saw a man that I [Ed] met in Indian Hill that does killer impersonations [Clayface].” *both end up nodding in agreement*

That’s one way to put it.

I mean, yeah...

“GHOSTS AREN’T REAL!” Pfft!

“But my father’s remains... you stole them from his grave?” WHAT NAH WHAT?!?

When did that happen?

I don’t know....

“I [Ed] gently placed his [Elijahs’] remains inside a dumpster behind a Chinese restaurant.” Oh that’s just mean!

That’s awfuuulll!

That’s meeeaannn!

“You were angry. I [Oswald] understand. I even forgive you.” I love how Ed’s like “Son of a bitch...” and he adjusts his glasses before he turns back.

“So you [Oswald] admit you killed Isabella?” “Fine. Is that what you want?” “Yes.” *groans in frustration*

“You [Ed] should thank me [Oswald] because we both know what would have happened if I hadn’t!” *bug eyes in alarm*

WHAAAATTT?!?

“I [Ed] could have lived a life with the woman I loved!” *both clap hands and aggressively point fingers at screen in agreement*

See see see see?!? Yes! God! Thank you!

“No, Ed. You would have killed her!” *leans back* NOOOOOOOOO!!!

“Just like you did the other one!” NOOOOOO!!!

Justice for Kristen Kringle too because I’m still pissed about that.

Yeah, I know, I know! Yeah, I hated what happened to her.

“I did it for love.” “What?!?” What?

“I did it because I love you.” *laughs in frustration*

“Love is about sacrifice! It’s about putting someone else’s needs before your own!” *splays hand towards screen in agreement*

“'Cause the truth is, Oswald, you would sacrifice anyone to save your own neck.” *silently nods in agreement*

“Even me.” Uh Ed, you’d do it too. *laughs*

I was gonna say, how does the guy who literally strangled his last girlfriend to death know more about love than [Oswald]?!?

“Now, if you'll look above us, you will see a cauldron of highly corrosive acid, which is currently being held in place by this chain. When the ice melts, the chain comes loose, the vat of acid tips... you get the idea.” This is such a Batman 66 trap.

I was gonna say Professor Ratigan but that works too.

*in unison* Snap! Boom! Twang! Thunk! Splat!

I mean, if you look really closely at the 66 Riddler, dude was like freaking Jigsaw.

He wasn’t in a wheelchair though.

*in best Jigsaw voice* Hello, Oswald.

Suck a dick, Oswald, Though not his dick- you might get mange.

*buries face in elbow* OH MY GODDDDDD!!

I’m surprised too.

OH MY GOODDDDDDD!!

“I mentioned that you [Jim] killed my husband on our wedding night,and he [Jerome] thought that was hilarious, so that’s something the two of you can bond over when you find him.” Lee’s just amazing.

LEEEEEEE!!!

Lee deserves better.

Though later, Lee’s like “Mmm, I’m still like extremely angry about this. Tetch Virus!” and I’m like “WHY?!?!?!?”

Tetch Virus AKA Dumb Plot Device.

Dull!

“I’ll’’ [Alfred] nip downstairs and see if there’s any life left in that old generator.” Does he have like no other- did the Waynes have any other staff besides Alfred?

I don’t know...

I’ve always wondered that.

I don’t know. They never really bring it up.

“Alfred....” Don’t do it!

*both freak out when Alfred gets jumped by cult followers*

Ohhhh shit!

*Jerome walks in, pretending to be a ghost* Pfffttt...

Seriously like, where did he get that outfit?

It’s a straitjacket! He nicked it out of Arkham, I’m sure.

Or it’s like “Oh I’m sorry, gotta find my old friend Bruce. Oh SYKE! Outfit change!”

He’s extra enough to do that.

The Valeska twins are just extra to the core. They’re from the circus, they’re judgy.

*chuckles* It comes with the territory.

“Teenagers, am I [Jerome] right?” You are one!

If I recall, he’s like a couple years older than Bruce.

*shakes head*

I would say he’s about [my sister’s] age.

Ohhh OK.

*The owl statue doesn’t break when Jerome drops it* It stuck!

*groans in frustration when Jerome ends up breaking the owl statue*

“Right. Sorry. The old noodle’s still a little al dente post-thaw.” *laughs* Al dente? Is that a pasta?

Don’t know.... I mean, I imagine, waking up from the dead, your brain would feel a little bit like spaghetti.

AN: Yeah, al dente describes pasta or rice that’s supposed to firm when you eat it.

“It’s been nagging at me since I [Jerome] woke up. The idea of slitting that pretty, pink throat of yours...” Don’t ever refer to Bruce as pretty pink anything.

*imitates the way Jerome twirls his knife in the air before pointing it at Bruce*

“And you’re [Jerome] just going to kill me here? That’s kinda disappointing.” You have got balls of steel, Bruce.

*mouths along with Jerome as he says “Flair? Hmmm? Style? Panache?!?”*

He’s like Alex from “A Clockwork Orange”

“I’m Bruce Wayne.” “I’m aware.” *both wheeze in laughter*

“My [Bruce’s] company is the machine that keeps the cogs of Gotham running.” OH MY GOD, you badass!

“You’re saying I [Jerome] need an audience?” Took you long enough to get it!

*tries not to laugh when Jerome suddenly dips into a British accent in front of Alfred*

“I [Bruce] will see you [Alfred] again.” *pats chest* God, I love their relationship in this shoooow!

That was like straight out of “Arkham Origins,” I swear...

I know....

*Oswald still tries to get out of Ed’s trap* Couldn’t you just like slide up though? Just shimmy up?

He can’t go far...

“I happen to be the mayor of Gotham...” *ends up cracking up at the delivery of that line*

“What did you do?” *scoffs in hilarity*

*Oswald gets out of the trap just in time* SHIIIT!!

OH IT ATE STRAIGHT THROUGH THE CAR.

*Jerome’s followers trash the manor in front of Alfred* Damn!

“And how ‘bout you, Mr. Machete? Come on in, sunshine. Don’t be shy. Your mother wasn’t. Chop-chop.” *BOTH JAWS DROP IN SHOCK*

*ends up wheezing*

DAAAAAMMMNNNN!!

GOOOO ALFRED!!!

YEESSSSSS!!!

WHERE THE HELL DID YOU [Jim] COME FROM?!?

He snuck in! That’s why Alfred was saying all that stuff. He was letting Jim know where everybody was.

Ohhhhhhh.... OK.

*on verge of losing voice* HE [Alfred] JUST STABBED HIM [the follower] WITH A MACHETE!

HOLY SHIT!

*reels back* OH ALFRED, YOU BADASS!

Holy shit!

OH MY GOD!

That was awesome!

Oh my God!

*Bruce arrives at the cult circus* Amusement Mile... I swear this is Amusement Mile..

I think so. It’s one of the few permanent landmarks Gotham has across incarnations.

*ends up wincing at half of the games the cult plays*

This is like a mix between “The Purge” and “Hell Fest”

Oh God.

That’s literally what this is.

“What do you say, Bruce? Wanna have some fun before the main event?” That’s a cool shot [of Jerome].

Hooo hooo...

*dives across room to put on hat for rest of episode*

Alfred’s like “I don’t care, I’m not police, I’m goin’ in!”

Oh my God...

Yess! Like the badass you are, Alfred!

*winces when Jerome stabs a follower beside him*

*both groan in horror when Jerome uses the blood to paint a frown on Bruce’s face*

*freezes when Tabitha snags her whip around Oswald’s neck*

Oh shit!

“Now, where’s Nygma?” “I [Oswald] don’t know.” If he’d knew, he’d murder his ass.

“[Butch] Stop pretending that you are anything but muscle! Yes, you used to be someone in Gotham, but those days are in the past!” You stop pretending that you have any pull in this situation, Oswald. You’re the one who has a whip around your neck!

“Remember when I [Tabitha] put a knife in your mom’s back?” Oh yeah, she’s the one that killed the mom. And it SUCKED!

“You [Oswald] never did anything about it.” *cups hands with mouth* S4 finale!

*proceeds to smack laptop with hat*

*bug eyes when Butch knocks out Oswald*

“You [Butch] realize you have to carry him now.” *both chuckle*

C’mon, he weighs like 120 pounds tops.

Soaking wet.

“A few dozen brainwashed maniacs can’t keep the city hostage forever.” “Well, duh...” Pffttt...

“The point is that all these people out here, looting, robbing, killing, they're the people who wash your car, who pour your coffee, who take out your trash. And what happened the moment the lights went out? They showed their true faces. They showed how quickly they want to open up your rich boy veins and bathe in your blue blood.” *very softly* Oooh, that’s a good line.

“There are good people in Gotham.” This is the Killing Joke. ‘All it takes is one bad day.’

“Face it, kid: Gotham has no heroes.” Yeah, but the people who crawl under their beds and lock their doors are the ones that are biding their time.

*Bruce pushes Jerome so that he messes up his shot* Ooohhh!

“Foul! He pushed me! Did you see that?!?” Genesis of Batman and Joker’s relationship: a shove!

*softly* Jesus Christ....

*The “punk” ends up being dropped anyway* Oh my God...

*both yell in disgust when Jerome has to re-staple part of his face*

“Did that hurt?” *z-snaps in shock*

*Jerome puts a staple in Bruce’s arm* Did he [Bruce] just No-Sell-

Ohhh! Ohhh! YES! YES HE DID! Yes he did!

*both yell when Jerome does it again*

Aaahhh! Aahh, that was on the wrist too!

“Stop!” He took two! He took two of those!

Over the wrist too! God, that’s a major vein!

Did you see Jerome there?!? He’s like “Well, wait a minute...”

*imitates the dramatic way Jerome puts his hat back on*

“Where the hell is our back up?” Still two minutes out.” Alfred is your back up!

*chuckles* All you need is Alfred!

“All right, so we [Jim, Harvey, and Alfred] go in, find Bruce, get him to safety, then we go after Jerome. Ready?” “Not really.” *chuckles*

*Jerome comes out in his ringmaster costume* AAAAHHHH THE SUIT!!

Oh, that’s so cool.

YESS!!

*Jerome slaps his butt* Did he-

Yes he did.

“The show is about toooo...begin!” He [Jerome] was doing a Mark Hamill voice there for a second!

I know! He does the Mark Hamill laugh sometimes.

Ohhh that’s badass!

Yeah.

*both try to laugh at the stock crowd gasp when Jerome shoots a rowdy audience member*

Y’know what, he [Jerome] would be the guy that would carry around canned sound effects like that.

“So, how to thank the best darn cult of fanatics a messiah like myself [Jerome] could ask for?” *chuckles* Oh my God...

“I give you-” *does small verbal keyboard smash when the ta-da fanfare stock sound goes off*

“QUEUE!” *laughs*

*Bruce gets carted out* Oh my God.

*mouths along with Jerome saying “Or better yet.... a boom?,” dramatic hand gesture included*

*The cannon gets rolled out* They’re gonna shoot his ass out of a cannon?!?

*laughs* Yeah, like Jerome’s gonna fly out of a cannon!

NO, Y’KNOW WHAT?!? I would pay good money to see that though!

*legitimately trying not to cry laughing* I can just see Cameron Monaghan going *makes flying sound effect*

No, like they’re gonna bada bing bada boom [shoot Bruce with the cannon]

Oh OK.

*laughs*

OK, y’know what, I would have bought it either way!

*keels over laughing* I’m just imagining Cameron Monaghan.... WHHHEEEEEUUUU!!!

AN: Please God someone draw this, I’m begging you.

“NAILED IT” AS HE [Jerome] POURS IN NAILS!

*both yell in horror at Jerome pouring various kitchen knifes into the cannon*

“Whatever you do, please, definitely try this at home. Preferably on a family member.” *wheezes*

“WHOOO! DOGGIE!” Somebody saw “Dr. Strangelove.”

Cameron’s like “Yes, I’m getting PAID!”

“Ready, partner?” *hits desk with hat*

*Alfred starts beating up cult members* Go Alfred!

Go Alfred!

*mutters* You magnificent boss, you...

*both laugh when Jerome’s hat gets shot off*

*Jerome sets off the cannon fuse* Oooooooooohhhhhhh!!

*yells*

*Bruce starts to pick the handcuffs off* C’mon, Bruuuuuuucceee.... c’mon, Bruuuuucccceee...

C’mon, last handcuff. You got this.

*Bruce loses one of the staples* Oooohhhhhhh!!!

Knock the thing [the stand that Bruce is on] over! Knock the thing over! Knock it over so at least you’re out of range!

Well he has one more [staple] though in his wrist. Or does he? Yeah, he has one more!

*in unison* C’mon, c’mon c’mon c’mon c’mon c’mon c’mon!

*jaws drop when Jim and Alfred discover the remnants of the staff that Bruce barely escaped from*

HOLY CRAP!

He broke it?!?

I guess...

Oh no, we gotta back to this [Ed and Oswald drama]! *hits leg with hat* Nooooo!!

“I [Oswald] I underestimated you, Barbara.” *sarcastically* NAAAHHH, really?!?

I hate that dress [the striped one Barbara wears]. I hate that dress so much.

Holy crap, ooooohhhh... that’s from Tabitha’s whip [the mark on Oswald’s neck]!

Ooooohhhh... euugghhh...

“So I [Oswald] help you [Barbara] find Ed... things go better for me... I don’t know, you kill me? That about it?” That’s just about the sound of it.

“Yeah.” Yeah.

*Bruce runs into the Mirror Maze* Oohhhhhhhhh...

Oooohhhhh here we go.

“Bruce, darling.” *points excitedly at screen*

This is the scene!

This is the one “Dark Knight Returns” homage I will ever accept.

*Jerome in front of the mirrors* OH MY GOOOOSSSHHH! Look at that!

That’s awesome.

That is amazing!

That is the coolest damn thing.

Ooooooooooooohhhhh!!

*Bruce comes into the frame* Whooooo hoo hooo hooooo!!

*shocked* Oh shit!

“You’re [Jerome] going to pay for what you’ve done.” *snaps fingers excitedly*

Daaamn, son!

“What’s going on? [Oswald] You have a weird look on your face. Like, weirder than normal.” *scoffs in hilarity*

“Oswald, you loved him, and he [Ed] betrayed you.” Kill him! Kill the love you feel! Prove that death is stronger than love! And you can have your own life again!

Yes, I quoted “Once on This Island,“ what of it?

“But I killed Isabella... because I wouldn’t share him.” Yeah, no shit, eh?

“Ed said love is sacrifice.” *buries face in hat*

“I shoudl have been able to sacrifice my happiness for his.” It took you this long?!?

*both shook when Ed walks in*

[Oswald] You are so dead now...

“You’re [Ed and Barbara] in this together.” Yeah, no shit, eh?

“I [Ed] wanted you [Oswald] to die knowing that you were incapable of loving another person.” “But I can. I just proved that, right?!?” No, you didn’t.

You notice that Bruce is like right beside him [Jerome]!

Yep.

“Let’s do this mano y mano.... my little conquistador [Bruce].” Ahhhhh, don’t call him that.

*gasps when Bruce tackles Jerome from behind*

Shit!

“What kind of hero tackles someone from behind?!?” *chuckles in shock*

*gasps when Bruce beats Jerome to the ground and starts the beatdown*

Keep going!

*Bruce picks up a piece of glass to stab Jerome with* Oh shit!

*both too much in the moment to say anything when Bruce decides not to kill Jerome*

*out of breath* Go Alfred...

C’mon, Alfred!

*both raise our hands and cheer when Bruce runs to hug Alfred*

*Jerome stumbles out toward Bruce and Alfred* OoOOhhhhh!! Ohhhh boy...

Take his ass out! He’s not gonna last much longer!

*yells in shock when Jim runs up and punches Jerome*

*both yell and reel back in horror/disgust when Jerome’s face gets punched off*

*trying not to laugh* His face is back off!

His face...

*in unison, with fancy hand gesture* Off!

*giggles* Had to lighten the mood somehow.

HE [Jim] JUST PUNCHED A DUDE’S FACE OFF!

*laughs* How often can you literally say that?

I KNOW!

“[Harvey] You wish I [Jim] would’ve shot him [Jerome]?” “Eh, he’d probably just come back from the dead again.” “Probably.” *both stifle a laugh*

“At least you [Jim] get to say you punched a man’s face off.” Exactly!

EEeeyyyyyyyy!

*grumbles and hits desk with hat* But Jeremiah dies in the next season.

Jeremiah?

*keels over* SON OF A-

*evil laugh*

There’s twins! Shut up!

“Well, got to say the clown makeup was way more terrifying than the damage underneath, Master Bruce.” Pfft.

“Did I [Alfred] ever tell you that I don’t like clowns?” *bug eyes in horror*

*whispers* You’re not gonna like Jeremiah then.

He’s less clownish than [Jerome]

True.

I love this orange lighting

“Shall I [Alfred] tell you [Bruce] what I thought? I thought how proud I was of you.” *puts hands to chest*

“Of the man you’ve become.” *smiles*

“I almost killed him, Alfred.” But you didn’t.

“But if you [Bruce] keep going, you’re gonna need rules.” Vengeance blackens the soul, Master Bruce. You walk the edge of that abyss every night, but you haven’t fallen over, and I thank heaven for that.

*softly* This is that scene!

“I will not kill.” *both raise our hands in anticipation*

SAY IT!

“Say it again.” Say it, c’mon...

C’mon!

“I will not kill.” *both clap hands toward screen*

YAAAASSSSS!!

My sweet badass bab!

*in dramatic Batman voice* Sad Boy... is now... Vengeful Boy!

*laughs*

*about falls out of chair reeling back* OH SNAP THE CLONE!

*bug eyes*

*throws hat at screen*

“I [Five] still don’t understand how I can help save Gotham.” His voice is different!

Yeah.

That’s the doppleganger theme!

Oh shit, son!

OOOOO-OOOOHHHH!!

*Someone knocks on Jim’s door.” Have a drink first. No wait, you’re gonna need that.

*softly* God damn, this freaking pier...

“Ed...I love you.” *both so done*

“I... don’t... love you.” *snaps fingers in agreement*

“You need me, Edward Nygma!” No he doesn’t!

“When I [Oswald] met you [Ed], you were a nervous, jittery, loser!” :[

“I created Edward Nygma!” You’re full of shit

AN: Oswald kinda has a point though. Just sayin’...

You see him [Oswald] spitting up foam?!?

“You can’t do this...” Yes he damn well can.

“Ed, are you listening to me?” “...I’m listening...“ NO! Don’t listen to him!

*both raise our eyebrows in shock when Ed shoots Oswald*

*laughs* AND WE NEVER SEE HIM AGAIN!

Push him in! Push him in!

*Ed pushes Oswald into the river* YEEEEEEESSSS...

*sings* IF YOU LOVE ME, LET ME GOOOO-OOOO-OOOOO!!

*slow jams to Penguin’s theme playing as Oswald sinks to the bottom*

Go to hell, Oswald. I know he lives but let me have this.

*jams the crap out to the ending theme*

#Gotham #FOX #the blogger reacts #looked at the stars and considered a reaction #the gentle art of making enemies #oswald copplepot #edward nygma #isabella gotham #bruce wayne #lee tompkins #jim gordon #jerome valeska #alfred pennyworth #cameron monaghan #jeremiah valeska #barbara kean #tabitha galavan #butch gilzean #court of owls

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