#ohhhh nooooo i have made a bunch of HEADCANONS about ee

[jcmorrigan]

Well got any headcanons for the soupy prince GIOVANNI?

DO I EVER!

-I personally love the trans headcanon. But also...biromantic asexual. And polyamorous. How many pride flags can I fit on one man?

-Polyamorous because I realized that he’s one of the few characters I really and truly love to multiship - my “OTP” for him is Giovanni x me x Crusher x Spike x Car Crash x Flamethrower x Darkstar x Ben

-He canonically has posters in his room of Jason Voorhees and Sailor Moon (or the EE equivalents thereof - I think that Sailor Moon might actually be a Phoenica), so it’s outright text that he likes slasher films and magical girl anime both

-Like...he finds the methods of most slashers disturbing but he loves to watch a good old-fashioned gorefest

-Though he’s really pretty lax when it comes to preferred fiction. If Molly wants to do a Disney movie night (because I bribed her with $50 to suggest it), then by God, Giovanni is going to GET INTO IT

-Plays a lot of video games as well

-This is incredibly specific, but I’m playing Tales of Berseria right now and I like to imagine him playing it with me and the one thing I know is that he very definitely has a crush on Rokurou Rangetsu that he’s only about 50% willing to admit

-Likes to experiment with cooking of all sorts because it slowly increases his Epithet proficiency (and also it’s fun)

-Swears a lot more than we necessarily see in canon

-I actually think his age makes more sense as in his mid-20s than 19 because of all the jokes about not knowing what tax returns are, but jury’s out on if I can call that a “headcanon” or just a straight-up AU I like

-Will minion-name ANYONE he befriends (except Ben)

-Pretends to hate Ben but it’s a weird “I love to hate him” kind of thing

-Unironically likes My Chemical Romance

-Voice is actually really suited to doing MCR songs at karaoke...and not much else

-Likes to spice up hangout/evil-planning sessions with the Blasters by starting such team-bonding activities as prank wars or water balloon fights

-Has an abandoned library in the middle of Sweet Jazz City where he likes to take his squad to work on schemes out from under the prying eyes of the upper-level Blasters. (I am ready to drop this at a moment’s notice if canon disproves.) Called it the “Lairbrary” once and now wants to pretend he never said that word

-If you’re his friend and not in his Blaster squad, and he’s given you a minion name (which is a given), he’ll also immediately design your villain outfit and would LOVE to work on it with you (also, he’s actually really good at drawing - he just doesn’t like to actually put in the time or effort unless it’s costume design)

-Halloween? BEST HOLIDAY. CAN MAKE MORE ELABORATE VILLAIN COSTUMES

-Loves to wear skirts! Just doesn’t think they should be gendered, because pants aren’t, so why are skirts? Will very aggressively remind you, though, if you’re rude about it, that this does not make him any less of a man. He never  wants to fully present female, just wear swishy skirts that spin when he twirls because they are fun.

-Doesn’t do his fucking laundry. It’s all over the house at any given moment. This is the source of 40% of his fights with his mom.

-You know how I said he will give you a minion name immediately if you’re his friend? Well, if you get on his BAD side, you get an insulting nickname that sticks with you unless you make it up to him (e.g. “Stupidhead” or “Idiotface” but he thrives best if he can make one based on your name - like, he wouldn’t insult you, but if he were to insult you, you’d be “April-Showers-Half-Baked-Brownies”)

-Is not good at dancing but loves to dance nonetheless

-Pajamas are pink tie-dye tee and shorts

-ASMR receptive

-Owns a pair of red Converse high-tops. THIS IS A PERSONAL THING DON’T ASK

-You know those lists that correct commonly-misused idioms to the correct phrase? Like how if you’re saying “for all intensive purposes,” the right one is “for all intents and purposes”? When I think of how he talks, I have to look at one of those backwards. He’s the kind of guy who will pledge his loyalty by saying “I am at your beckon call!” no matter how many times you correct him.

-Oh, and remember how I said he likes gore-fest horror films? That’s all fine and good, when it’s your standard murder and blood and guts. But if he decides to test his fortitude by reading CreepyPastas that get a little more creative and reality-warping with their horror, he is getting no sleep that night.

-Has never actually killed a person, but if someone were threatening a person he loves, he would not hesitate. (Though I wouldn’t be surprised if this issue comes up in canon, so it’s subject to change, of course)

I feel like I have a thousand more I’m not remembering but this is enough textwall already