#ohh voy

[pnuk-r0ck]

band

[aenslem]

Star Trek: Voyager (1995–2001) || 1.03 "Parallax"

[singeart]

Janeway trying coffee lemonade and going down a rabbit hole of strange beverages!

thank you @dianeames for the suggestion!

[altairring]

I AM SCREAMNG MY HEAD OFF

[elbiotipo]

I was so busy making the sexiest and most perfect salsa of all time that I forgot to boil the pasta

[oreoluvskento]

gojo being dangerously loud

a/n: i know this is supposed to be a nanami focused account but hear me out... whiny gojo. that's it.

cw: cunnilingus, riding, ummm gojo being drunk and loud and his baby girl moans, semi-public sex (they're in a bathroom), i am so horny and i just need him so bad

you love the sounds your boyfriend makes during sex. he's never been shameful about it either, always loud and proud about the way your pussy makes him feel. this time, however, you wish he'd shut up.

you two are currently in your friends bathroom during a drunk movie night. you were both pretty tipsy, gojo more drunk than you and you were having a great time. all of a sudden, he doubled over, making it obvious to everyone that there was something wrong and he needed a bathroom fast.

except, when you follow him in and he locks the door behind you, there is nothing wrong with him at all, besides the raging boner he was currently sporting. your eyes widened when you saw it, but the casamigos in your bloodstream was stopping you from thinking clearly and the next thing you knew, you were getting eaten out on your friends bathroom floor.

"'toru, fuck, i'm close!" you whisper, holding his head harder and he speeds up, his tongue flicking your clit constantly as his two middle fingers are going to work. when you cum, you cover your mouth with your hand as your back arches off the floor and gojo doesn't pull away. you have to manually drag him away from you and he immediately goes for your lips, making your mouth just as messy as his own.

as the two of you kiss, he sits up and pulls you against his body sitting against the bathtub. you make quick work of his pants and without wasting any time you lower yourself on him. the last thing you expected was for him to throw his head back and let out one of the sluttiest moans you had ever heard. "ahhh fuckkk!"

you quickly slap your hand against his mouth and pray to god that no one heard that. he lifts his head and looks at you with furrowed eyebrows and low eyes, whimpering quietly against your hand at your pussy pulsing around him. "satoru, you've got to be quiet, baby, okay?" you ask and he nods, his cheeks red.

you finally lift your hips and before you could even go back down, a deep groan comes from his throat and you stop again. he gets impatient and pulls you down himself, dropping his forehead against yours as he moves you faster.

"mmph feels too good, can't stop," he says breathlessly against your palm, and you have to drop your head on his shoulder at the speed he was going. he truly was trying his best, but as the two of you went on, his whines got louder and louder until they were hoarse moans.

"im close, im close, please, please, please!" he cries against your skin and you take over, pressing your lips against his in the process. he moans into the kiss, his body going weak when you trade the fast movement for slow, deeper movements.

"you like it, 'toru?" you ask, your lips moving against his. he nods quickly, tears beginning to form in his eyes at the sensitivity of his dick but you don't stop.

"baby please- haaa fuckkk!" he begs squeezing your hips and you shake your head.

"promise me you'll be quiet when you cum," you instruct and he nods furiously, just wanting to feel his orgasm. you take his word for it, partly because you were ready to cum too, but you cover his mouth for safe measures.

you go faster now, grinding your hips down on his, and almost as soon as you start, you feel him start to shake and thrust into you himself. "ah, ah ahhhh fuck, fuck, fuck, cummingggg!"

before you could say anything, he holds you down, his head buried in your neck as he moans in your ear and your orgasm hits as well, spurring him on. "ohh shitshitshit too much too much fuuuck!" he cries, holding your body against his as you ride your orgasm out. right when you finish, you hear a knock on the door and your friend's concerned voice.

"hey, is he okay in there, do you guys need help?" her voice rings out and your eyes widen.

"yeah, he's okay, just drank a bit too much!" you shout back and turn back to look at your boyfriend. "cough," you instruct and he does just that. you reach to the side and flush the toilet and pretend to pat his back. "that's okay, get it all out."

"okay, there's some water in the kitchen for him when he's done," she says and leaves. you let out a sigh of relief and drop your head on a slightly sobered up gojo's chest.

"my bad," he whispers and you roll your eyes as you stand up.

"shut up."

[pixiecaps]

(Context: Foolish was playing Deadlock with Ellum and Cellbit and got called by BBH from Twitchcon.)

BBH: Do you want to talk to, uh, I got a fan say that they’re your number one fan. Do you want to talk to them?

Foolish: Yeah no, I would love to talk to my number one fan.

BBH: Alright, I’m going to hand it over, okay?

Foolish: Okay.

Roier: A ver hijo de tu puta.

(Foolish laughs.)

Foolish: Hola!!

Roier: Qué pasó cabrón? Qué andas haciendo, eh?

Foolish: Hola, hola pendejo!

Roier: Qué pasó pendejo-

Foolish: (Speaking over each other) Mi numero, mi numero uno-

Roier: Por qué no- Por qué no viniste a San Diego Twitchcon, eh? Por qué? Por qué?

Foolish: Ohh. Lo siento.

Roier: Por qué pendejo, por qué pendejo?

Foolish: Uhh yo necesito- (Roier keeps talking over him)

Roier: Por qué? Responde. Responde hijo de tu puta madre.

Foolish: Yo necesito- Puta madre? Chinga tu madre, chinga tu madre!

(Roier laughs.)

Roier: Aye, Foolish.

Foolish: Hello.

Roier: Pendejo, pendejo, pendejo, pendejo.

Foolish: Listen I-

BBH: Oh! It’s me again. Sorry.

Foolish: Oh damn.

-

(Foolish then talks to Tina over the phone and it gets handed back to Roier.)

Foolish: That’s a fun meetup going on there.

Tina: Anyways here’s your bestie!

Foolish: Wait, which one’s my bestie?

Roier: (Gets handed phone) Hello?

Foolish: Ah, fuck. Hello.

Roier: Hello, pendejo. Hey, come right now. Come right now, come right now.

Foolish: Right now? You want me to come?

Roier: I’m going to wait you here- What? Cum?

Foolish: That’s- I just said the same thing you said.

Roier: No, no, come here. Come here.

Foolish: Yeah! Exactly. Uh, ahora.

Roier: Ahora, ahora. Right now.

Foolish: Uhh.. espera. Espera para mi.

Roier: Okay, sí, sí, sí. Aqui te espero.

Foolish: Un momento, un momento. Uh. Uhh.

Roier: Sí?

Foolish: Busco, uhh, busco una- un aeropuerta. (Correcting himself) Aeropuerto.

Roier: Un aeropuerto, aeropuerto?

Foolish: Sí, sí, sí.

Roier: O voy a tu casa.

Foolish: Ahh- voy? Oh! Mi casa?

Roier: Sí, tu casa.

Foolish: Ooh. Sí, sí.

Roier: Y te mato, y te mato.

Foolish: Sí- “Mato”?

Roier: Te voy a matar.

Foolish: “Matar”? To kill me?!

Roier: Te voy a matar, te voy a matar. Sí.

Foolish: What? QUÉ?! POR QUÉ?

Roier: Porque- Porque no viniste.

Foolish: (Trying to understand) “No me viste”? Cause I didn’t visit you?

Roier: (Repeating) No viniste. No viniste.

Foolish: No me viste?

Roier: Viniste!

Foolish: No entiendo.

Roier: Okay, fuck you Foolish. Fuck you. Fuck you Foolish!

Foolish: Woah, woah! You can’t just give up! (Laughs)

BBH: (Gets the phone back.) So you had fun talking to your number one fan?

Foolish: Uh, yeah. He was a little aggressive but.

BBH: No, no, he loves you.

-

(Missa gets the phone next.)

Missa: Hey Foolish!

Foolish: Hello? Hello! Missa!!!

Missa: How’s it going?

Foolish: Oh my goodness.

Missa: I just want to tell you that I miss you and love you. And I-

Foolish: I love you too.

Missa: I just bought something because I thought it was going to- I was going to look at you in the eyes today but I didn’t so.

Foolish: Oh. Oh. Uhh.

Missa: But it’s alright. I just want to tell you that I love you and that’s it.

Foolish: Oh. (Laughs) Okay, listen. Maybe tomorrow.

Missa: Really??

Foolish: No. (Laughs)

Missa: Is that- Is that a promise?

Foolish: Uhhh, yes. Yes. A Christmas promise.

Missa: (Excited) I can’t- OoOohh. Okay. Okay. Thank you so much. Thank you so much.

Foolish: Yes, yes no problem. No problem.

Missa: I’ll see you tomorrow.

Foolish: Yeah, see you tomorrow man. See you tomorrow.

Missa: Yeah! See you tomorrow! See ya!

Roier: (Imitating Missa) Foolish, Foolish, Foolish. Fuck you Foolish.

Foolish: Woah?! Woah!

Roier: Fuck you Foolish.

Foolish: Woah!

Roier: Fuck you Foolish.

Foolish: That’s crazy!

Missa: IT’S NOT ME! THAT’S NOT ME!

Foolish: Oh, that was someone else?

Roier: (Still imitating) That’s me, Missa. That’s me, that’s me, Missa.

Foolish: Wait, Missa? Missa, what in the world.

Roier: Missa, yes. This is me, Missa. Fuck you.

Foolish: How could you say that? How could you say that, Missa? You just said you love me.

Roier: (??) and you smell like shit. You smell like shit now. I changed my opinion. I changed my opinion on you.

Foolish: Okay, you’re a bad guy. You’re a bad guy.

Roier: No, you’re a bad guy. You didn’t come to see me.

(Foolish laughs.)

Roier: To see MissaSinfonia.

Foolish: I had no clue you were gonna be there.. Missa!

Roier: No, I’m not going to be here anymore. Goodbye.

Foolish: Okay, goodbye.

(Audio cuts a bunch.)

Missa: (Imitating) Hey, I’m Roier right now. On the phone.

Foolish: Oh! Hello, Roier.

Missa: So, that’s my voice, yeah. I’m from Mexico. I eat tacos and stuff.

(Foolish laughs.)

Missa: I am Roier. I don’t have- I don’t have (Laughs) A piece of my intestine- I don’t even know what is the problem with Roier but yeah I’m Roier.

Foolish: Yeah, his stomach. His stomach is always, you know, always pooping. Always pooping.

Missa: It is, right? I’m so weird, I’m Roier. Yeah.

Foolish: (Laughs) Dude, that’s crazy.

Missa: Or as I say all the time, pendejo!

Foolish: Oh my goodness, Roier! It is you!

Missa: That’s me! That’s me as you can tell.

Foolish: Pendejo, pendejo.

Missa: See you! See you, Foolish.

Foolish: Oh, goodbye Roier!

Missa: I miss you!

Foolish: I miss you too man.

Missa: Have a good oneee!

Foolish: (Laughs) Thank you. Thank you have a good night.

Missa: Bye bye!!!

Foolish: Goodbye, Roier!

(The call ends.)

[sthavoc]

𝐄𝐍𝐆𝐋𝐈𝐒𝐇 𝐋𝐄𝐒𝐒𝐎𝐍𝐒 | ENZO VOGRINCIC

𖥔 ࣪˖ pairing: enzo x fem!reader

𖥔 ࣪˖ summary: with all the events enzo is attending, he thinks it would be a good idea to learn a bit of english, especially with the Oscars coming around. lucky for him he had the perfect person.

𖥔 ࣪˖ warnings: just pure fluff

𖥔 ࣪˖ note: I wouldn’t mind teaching him if he asked 😅 this one is short and I’m sorry if there’s any mistakes.. I didn’t have enough time to proofread.. ohh and btw I will start taking requests for enzito! :))

“Dale nena. Un poquito na’ más.” Enzo’s arm travels around your waist as he brings you closer to him on the couch.

He had been attempting his very best to persuade you by showing him a few basics of English. He wanted to involve himself in additional conversations with other celebrities, and when the idea popped into his head he thought you would be the perfect help.

“Enzo.” You giggle pushing him with your hand on his chest. You noticed how he tried to look serious. “Que quieres aprender.” He smiles at how you give in.

“Lo básico.” He shrugs but then he thinks. “A ver cómo se dice—” he licks his lips, his elbow resting on the couch with his sight on you. “Es un gusto conocerte.”

“It’s a pleasure to meet you.”

“It’s.. a pleasure.. to meet you.” Enzo repeats. His eyes squint as he somewhat tilts his head to the side due to the bit of struggle of pronunciation.

“Nada mal eh.” He smiles at your compliment.

“Gracias, gracias.” He brings his hand to his chest. “A ver cómo se dice… estoy muy contento de estar aquí.”

“I am very happy to be here.”

“I am.. very.. very—” he shakes his head making you giggle. “happy to be.. here!” He drops his hand in a sudden movement making the both of you move.

“Enzo!” your chuckles muffled into his chest. Your head looks up into his eyes as his arm remained wrapped around the back of your neck.

“Ya pero, como se dice-” he whispers with a hint of raspiness in his voice close to your lips. He speaks “Tengo a la novia más hermosa de todo el mundo” before giving your lips a peck as you smiled.

“I have the most beautiful girlfriend in the whole world.” You look into his eyes as he gave you one of his oh so charming smiles.

“I have the most beautiful girlfriend in the whole world.” he managed to say before he kissed your lips again. This time he brought your bottom lip into his own lips as his hand reached for your cheek. His thumb rested on the sculpture of your cheekbone while the rest of his hand rested on the back of your neck.

“sabes a dulce chiquita.” he whispers into your lips. The two of you chuckled at his comment. You pulled away licking your lips not even attempting to hide your growing smile as you stared at him.

Enzo somehow would always find a way to bring a smile to your face. Whether it was with a silly comment or him showing you affection and loading you with compliments.

Your fingers traced the strands of his hair that hung on his face or on the side of it. “que cosas dices En.”

“Te las digo a vos.” You roll your eyes jokingly as he shrugs. “Eres beautiful.” the word exaggerates coming out of his lips making you laugh at his goofiness.

“Pues tú eres handsome.” You give him a quick peck.

The two of you stayed in the couch enjoying each other’s comfortable silence. Enzo’s fingertips traced up and down on your bare arm, almost leaving goosebumps. You rested on his chest next to him as you kept your hand next to you while the other rested beneath you.

“Estás nervioso por los Oscars?” Your mumbled words vibrated on Enzo’s chest as you spoke.

“Un poco, pero entusiasmado.”

You bring your head up to look him in the eye. “No tienes por qué estar nervioso. Ya verás que se lo llevan, ustedes hicieron un gran trabajo.” His eyes had a glint in them as he softly gazed onto you. You seemed so positive. “Traen a todo mundo loco En. Ese Oscar es de ustedes. Y les voy a echar porras cuando digan las nominaciones.” You boop his nose with your finger tip making him blink before a smile appeared on his lips followed by—

“Ay, te amo chiquita.” He kisses you again. Your words eased him.

“Yo te amo más.”

[thew4nder3r]

I don't know why but i just think about Miguel with a latina girlfriend but not just any latina. A mexican girl. And a lil something about us mexican girl is that we only take shit from two men. Our fathers and god. No else. 💁🏽‍♀️

He hates how much of a chokehold you have on him.

i mean, he's the leader of the whole ass spider organization but the second he sees you mumbling in spanish oh god this man's never experienced this much fear.

one day, he had sent you on a mission to another universe and you came back soaked in rain and pissed off.

"How was it- oh shit." He quickly shut up when he saw your angry face.

"oh it went amazing." You yank your mask off and throw it to god knows where.

"Miguel i swear to fucking god the next time you send me on a mission and i come back soaking wet i WILL SNAP YOUR NECK." he knew you didn't mean it but the way you got in his face and on the tips of your toes as you yelled made his body tense.

"Su puta madre me voy a regresar a mi universo y quedarme con mi papá por que con una CHINGADA YA ME HARTE DE ANDAR PERSIGUIENDO PINCHES GENTE POR CIUDADES QUE NI CONOZCO!" You screamed and ranted about how much you hated chasing people around 24/7. "Tiene hambre mi chiquita?" God that nickname it made you melt.

"yea...very hungry." You stand up from the couch, grabbing your hair and pushing it behind you.

"I made soup." "Congrats. You didn't burn the house down." You joke and he playfully pushes your shoulder.

"How was the mission?" He asked, sitting next to you. "You were gone for a while."

you sigh. "It was okay, supongo. We caught who we needed to catch but then the rain started pouring and now i look like a soaked cat."

he grabs your hair, pulling it into a low ponytail. "So it doesn't irritate mi princesa."

How does he do this? Every time you're in a bad mood, he always makes you feel better. "Thanks." You smile. "Am i crazy or is your skin darker than last week?" You laugh. "Don't you like my skin? Or would you prefer a blonde chic who can't go outside without getting a sunburn?" You smirk at him. He comes closer to you, kissing your jawline. "I like your skin like this. Mi morenita~" you giggle. You lean in to kiss his lips but stop only an inch away from him. "I missed you..."

He HATES how everyone makes fun of him.

Lyla always tells him how "he's the boss but she's the mastermind."

One time, Hobby had gotten on his nerves and he had started to go off on him until he felt your hand on his shoulder.

"miguel. No seas grosero." Everyone went silent. Expecting Miguel to start fuming. How DARE anyone tell him what to do?!

"Fine." Everyone was so confused. "Did she?" "Yep."

"what the hell are all of you looking at?! GET OUT!!" Ahh there he is.

Once everyone had left, he pressed his body against yours and hid his face in your neck. "God i hate that kid." You laughed at how exhausted he sounded.

okay. Now we're getting into the smut part of it. So yea. 🧍‍♀️💦

God this man.

he's fucking animalistic.

"Hmm yea you like this don't you? Ohh yea cum for papi. Cum on papi's dick."

woof woof bark 😫💦

he likes when you're a brat but he'll never admit it.

"Maldita niña malcriada. What would your father think, hmm? Seeing your boyfriend fuck the brat outta you?"

He'll wrap his hand around your neck and push you deeper into the pillows of your shared bed.

He looks all high and mighty but he will melt the moment you push him down onto his chair and straddle his lap.

"Ohh yea. Muy bien chiquita." He's got a firm grip on your hips as he stares at the place where your bodies met.

he loved seeing how face contort in please. Your wavy dark hair cascading down your shoulders as you bounced on his dick.

"You like bouncing on my dick, corazón? Yea yea you do, pretty girl. Keep bouncing just like that." His praises made you clench around him causing him to let out a whimper.

this man can eat me for breakfast lunch and dinner 😘

[wosohavemyheart]

LEVANTALA MUY ALTO

Después de más de 20 horas de vuelos junto a dos de mis compañeras inseparables de profesión, Sandra y Mayca, finalmente llegamos a Auckland para reportar el Mundial Femenino

-¿Ahora qué?- Pregunto cuando tenemos nuestras maletas

- Pues hay que ir a buscar el coche- Dice Sandra- Luego iremos al hotel a que nos den las llaves

-Que aburridas sois- Les saco la lengua- Vámonos de fiesta.

-Que va, tia. Son las 9 de la noche y mañana hay que levantarse a las 8 para ir al entreno- Dice ahora Mayca- Además, tú no tienes Jetlag?

-Pfff ¿qué es eso?-Me encojo de hombros- Vaya panda de sosas

Me meto con ellas y se ríen haciéndome caras.

-Tenemos muchos días por delante.

-Si tú lo dices

Cogemos el coche y nos dirigimos hacia el hotel.

Al entrar me dirijo a recepción para hacer la entrada.

-Lo sentimos, ha habido un incidente y no podemos hospedarlas en este hotel.

-¿Entonces ahora que pasa?- Pregunto con la ceja alzada.

-Hemos hablado con un hotel de la misma compañia y nos han dejado un par de habitaciones para ustedes.

Bufo pero no me queda más remedio que aceptar. No creo que quieran dormir en la calle.

-¿Qué hotel será?

-El Copthorne en Palmerston North- Dice y la cara de mala ostia se me quita enseguida.

Ahí es donde está la selección española y por ende, mi mujer.

Asiento

-Es un hotel con una estrella más y las habitaciones son más grandes- Informa la chica- Perdón por las molestias, señorita

-No pasa nada- Le doy una sonrisa amigable y me voy hacia las chicas- Vamos

-¿Qué? ¿A dónde? - Pregunta la andaluza.

-Nos vamos al hotel Copthorne. Han tenido unos problemas aquí- Informo una vez en el coche.

-¿Ahí no es donde están...?

No la dejo terminar

-Sí, la selección española- Afirmo y empiezo a conducir.

-Pues mira eh- Levanta las cejas sugerente Sandra- Ni pintado.

Me río con ellas y les saco la lengua.

Por fin en el hotel conseguimos nuestras habitaciones y por un fallo del sistema teníamos cada una una habitación con cama matrimonial.

Después de dejar las maletas bajo y salgo a la entrada del hotel pero me escondo un poco para que no pueda ser vista con facilidad y decido enviarle un mensaje a Alexia

"Bebé"

"¿Estás despierta?"

Con la tonteria ya eran casi las 11 de la noche.

A los 15 minutos responde.

"Por poco tiempo 😴😴"

"¿Pasa algo, amor?"

"¿Puedes salir fuera del hotel?"

"Tengo que hablarte de algo importante"

"¿Qué? ¿Estás bien?"

"Ahora mismo salgo"

"Tú solo sal y llamame"

En ese momento pongo en silencio el móvil para que no me descubra.

A los diez minutos sale con una gorra negra y un chandal de la selección.

Me la quedo mirando mientras se apoyó contra una pared y mueve la pierna nerviosamente con el teléfono en la oreja.

Cuando ve que no contesto se le arruga más la frente y no puedo evitar sonreír enormemente.

Es preciosa.

No puedo creer la suerte que tuve de conocerla y que haya decidido quererme.

Me acerco silenciosamente por detrás y pongo mis manos sobre sus ojos.

-¿Qué hace la Barbie futbolista fuera sola?- Susurro sobre su cuello y noto como se le erizan sus pelitos.

Consigo darle un suave beso ahí antes de que se de la vuelta y me abrace con fuerza.

-¿Qué haces aquí, amor? Me dijiste que vendrías mañana- Dice cuando nos separamos

-Una pequeña mentira- Susurro después de besarla profundamente

-Me habías preocupado idiota- Me da un golpe en el brazo y me rio- Pensaba que te había pasado algo y luego cuando no cogias...

-Solo quería observante unos minutos- Le doy una sonrisa ladeada- Estás preciosa

-Basta- Se sonroja- Estoy con un chándal solo

-Ohh, mi amor, no sabes tu el poder que tienes con los chandals y esa gorra- Me muerdo el labio inferior- Incluso con una bolsa de basura te verías espectacular.

-Idiota- Se ríe dándome un beso que intento alargar.

-¿Con quien duermes?

-Con Jenni

-¿Qué tal si vamos a mi habitación? Te he echado de menos

-No puedo salir del hotel, amor

-Ohhh- Me rio- Eso no va a ser un problema

La arrastro hasta el ascensor

-¿También me has mentido en esto?- Levanta la ceja.

-Mmh no, en el otro hotel tuvieron problemas y nos han mandado a este y como iba yo- Me señalo para dar más énfasis- decir que no?

-Para mi mejor y estoy segura que las chicas se alegrarán de verte- Me sonrie dándome otro beso- Pero a Vilda no le hará mucha gracias- Hace una mueca

Me encojo de hombros

-Yo me lo voy a pasar bomba- Le aseguro

Niega con la cabeza y entramos en el ascensor.

-Pero ahora... Dejemos de hablar

Dicho esto último empezamos a besarnos y terminamos haciendo el amor en el cuarto.

Me despierto cuando escucho un ruido de una alarma y movimiento debajo mio.

-Mmmh quieres apagar eso- Gruño en un susurro mientras me escondo más en el cuello de Alexia

En ese momento se apaga y siento caricias en mi espalda baja y mi culo, si, tiene una obsesión con este último pero yo también con el suyo.

-Es hora de levantarse, amor- Susurra dándome besos

-¿Porque coño sois tan madrugadoras? Si no fuera por vosotras podría quedarme más tiempo durmiendo.

-Venga, no te quejes tanto- Se ríe y me da un apretón en el culo.

-5 minutos más, mami- Digo con los ojos cerrados a punto de dormirme otra vez.

No dice nada más así que sonrío aún sin moverme.

-¿Eres mi cama favorita sabes?- Le digo

-Creo que me había dado cuenta- Bromea aún haciéndome caricias

-Pero no me gusta que la cama se tenga que levantar temprano- Hago un puchero y lo besa.

-Me encantaría estar así más contigo pero tu tienes entrevistas que hacer y yo balones que chutar.

Bufo y hace el intento de levantarse pero no la dejo subiéndome a horcajadas.

-T/n- Se queja divertida y le sonrío.

-Piensas irte de aquí sin darme un beso en condiciones? - Digo indignada y me acerco rozando nuestras narices.

Estamos unos minutos besandonos en condiciones hasta que la dejo salir de la cama. Me tumbo en ella con las manos debajo de la cabeza mirando a mi mujer caminando por la habitación desnuda.

Le silbo y me mira negando la cabeza, yo le sonrío inocentemente.

Estoy por decirle algo pero tocan la puerta

-¿Quién es?- Grito aún en la cama

-Levantate ya T/n- Dice Sandra

-Estoy levantada- Le miento

-Mentirosa, venga, que van a cerrar el comedor y te vas a quedar sin comer- Me dice

Al escuchar eso me levanto enseguida tropezándome con un zapato de Alexia.

-Ya está levantada, Sandra- Grita ahora Alexia divertida mientras termina de ponerse la ropa.

-YA VOY, YA. Con la comida no se juega-Digo con voz normal esto último ya terminada de vestirme.

-Mira que rápido te levantas- Se burla Ale

Me acerco a ella por detrás y pongo mi boca en su oído.

-Si me hubieras dicho de ir al baño, me hubiera levantado más rápido.

Dejó un beso en su cuello y la miro a través del espejo

-Otro día- Promete ella

Le doy un mordisco y luego un beso en esa zona sensible y me separo de ella con mucha fuerza de voluntad.

-Bien, ahora vete, sino no saldremos en todo el día de aquí

Me da un pico y se dirige a la puerta, en ese momento veo algo en el suelo.

-Amor- La llamo y me mira- Espera- Me acerco y le pongo la gorra negra bien- Ahora sí.

-Tienes un serio problema eh

-Y tú con mi culo y no te digo nada

-Touché pero es recíproco- Me besa y antes de irse me da un golpe en este.

A los pocos minutos bajo y me encuentro de camino a Sandra y Mayca.

-Hombreeeee por fin de levantas- Dice Mayca

-¿Me podeis culpar?- Le pregunto.

-No, la verdad que no- Responden

En el comedor saludo a todas las chicas y con más confianza a las del barça ya que estoy mucho tiempo con ellas y aunque nos insisten en que nos quedemos con ellas decidimos no hacerlo para preparar las preguntas y los próximos días.

Cuando entra Vilda al comedor y nos ve y se cambia la cara pero se queda demasiado tiempo mirándome a mí.

Él y yo tenemos una buena relación, notar el sarcasmo.

He sido una de las pocas periodistas que ha ido a muerte a por él y no pienso parar no después de que mis amigas se hayan tenido que perder este mundial por su culpa y la de la federación y otras que lo estén pero en pésimas condiciones.

Los días pasan y con ello las primeras entrevistas a diversas jugadoras, ruedas de prensa y partidos.

Alexia había decidido estar un poco fuera de los medios y ¿quien podía culparla? Ya no era capitana y no tenía la obligación ni la necesidad de contentar a los medios

Habían saltado las alarmas de que había tenido una pequeña recaída y más cuando los primeros días pero había calmado a todo el mundo con un post de Instagram.

Hoy habían jugado contra Zambia y Alexia tuvo unos buenos 45 minutos y una asistencia cosa que no estaba nada mal y tenía a casi todos contentos, menos a uno, Vilda.

Estaba caminando por los pasillos del hotel y me frene cuando escuche gritos conocidos.

Me pare detrás de la puerta a escuchar.

-Eres una inútil, Putellas. Te lesionaste tontamente y ahora que estas recuperada en teoría no puedes jugar, no sirves para nada, ni para jugar 45 minutos contra un equipo mediocre y encima solo un gol en lo que llevamos de concentración. ¿Y tú eres la mejor jugadora del mundo? - Se ríe despectivamente- Ya no sirves para nada. Esa lesión a sido tu tumba

-¿Cuándo piensas mandar a que miren a Athenea?- Ignora lo que le dice y yo me muerdo las mejillas para no entrar dentro y matarlo.

-Esa niñata no tiene nada, solo se queja para llamar la atención. Es otra inútil que no sabe correr detrás de un balón.

Puedo imaginar a Alexia a punto de estallar pero se que no lo hará.

Escucho como alguien se acerca a la puerta y me escondo detrás de una esquina, la puerta se abre.

-Ah, antes de que se me olvide- Es Alexia -Yo que tu reflexionaría con la almohada quien es el inútil dentro del equipo si tu o nosotras- Suelta una risa nasal- Porque para ti no serviremos como jugadoras pero es que tu no sirves ni para persona.

Con eso dicho se va y deja al estúpido de Vilda dentro.

Voy en busca de Alexia y me la encuentro en la puerta de mi habitación.

-¿Dónde estabas?- Me pregunta enseguida cuando me ve y me abraza demasiado fuerte.

-Buscandote

Entramos en el cuarto sin separarnos y nos tumbamos en la cama.

-¿Qué pasa, mi amor?- Pregunto.

-Vilda- Le doy un beso en el pelo

-Lo sé, escuche una parte de la discusión- Confieso.

-¿Crees que voy a volver a ser la de antes?- Susurra y aunque no la veo puedo sentir que está a punto de llorar.

-No, no lo creo- Le respondo y levanta la cabeza mirándome- Estoy segura de que volverás a la misma condición que estabas antes de la LCA pero confío, creo y sé que serás mejor que antes y será tu mejor punto de tu carrera.

-Dice que soy una inútil y que no hago nada bueno cuando tengo minutos.

-Ohhh por favor, ese gilipollas me va a escuchar- Refunfuño- Mi amor, el gol que metiste contra Panamá con ese sombrerito que te marcaste y hoy con la asistencia de Jenni te veo genial y encima hoy solo has jugado media parte y has estado en todos lados ayudando y defendiendo, tu presencia se nota dentro del campo.

-Pero no es lo que puedo dar, puedo hacerlo mucho mejor-Dice machacandose a ella misma

-Alexia, escuchame muy bien- Diga con tono firme y alzando la ceja- Te has recuperado de esa lesión de mierda en 299 días, marcaste un gol a tu quinto partido después de redebutar que no fuiste consciente ni disfrutaste porque perdiste, pero eso tiene mucho mérito, has estado haciendo la diferencia en el juego tanto dentro como fuera del campo y si, no puedes jugar 90 minutos todavía, pero lo harás- Le aseguro- Más pronto que tarde ya estarás jugando todo el partido y el año que viene volverás a conseguir ese balón de oro otra vez- Pauso- ¿Y sabes porqué, amor?

-¿Porqué?

-Porque lo que no has podido dar esta temporada lo vas a hacer en la siguiente y de manera doble o triple con las ganas que tienes- Le aseguro y me regala una sonrisa.

-Tengo un montón de suerte de tenerte- Dice emocionada y yo niego con la cabeza.

-La afortunada soy yo, eres el ser humano más bueno, gentil, amable y cariñoso que he conocido- Digo mirandola con adoración- Y encima eres una sexy futbolista cañón blaugrana y que tiene un cuerpo de infarto ¿que más puedo pedir?- Le guiño un ojo

-Si no fuera del barça ni me habrias mirado- Bromea ella picandome la costilla.

-Puedes estar segura de ello- Le sigo la broma- ¿Para que querría yo un mujer futbolista que no sea culé?

-Mmmmh no lo sé, no le veo el sentido- Se sienta encima mia y juntamos nuestros labios.

Me separo un momento

-Si te vuelves a sentir así quiero que me lo cuentes y no te machaques tanto, porfavor- Le pido

-Lo sé- Sigue besándome

Estamos acariciándonos por encima de la ropa pero al final terminamos con esta fuera.

Hicimos el amor muy lentamente y sin prisa, sintiendo el cuerpo de la otra con amor y ternura.

Alexia cuando terminamos se durmió enseguida pero yo no pude, estuve varias horas con ella en la cama pero cuando no pude más me levante con cuidado de no despertarla, me vesti con su camiseta y cogí el portátil y me senté afuera en la terraza.

Grabé lo que escuche de discusión entre Alexia y Vilda y he decidido hacer un artículo o por lo menos intentarlo.

No sabía lo que llevaba liada con el artículo hasta que alguien me rodeo con sus brazos por la espalda y medio cerré la pantalla del ordenador

-¿Qué haces despierta, amor?- Me susurra y veo el reloj en su muñeca y son las 6 de la mañana

-Escribir algo, bebé- Le contesto de vuelta y pongo mis manos encima de las suyas acariciándolas.

-¿Has dormido algo?- Pregunta preocupada

-No

-¿Puedo ver lo que estabas escribiendo?

Normalmente le enseñaba mis articulos sin preguntarme o cuando ella lo hacía pero me gire dudosa

-Bebé, te escuché ayer cuando discutiste con Vilda- Empiezo dudosa

-Me lo dijiste- Asiente con la cabeza

-Y grabé lo que escuché- Hago una pausa- Quiero que leas el artículo y me digas que piensas, si no estás de acuerdo también quiero que me lo digas- La miro- Cualquier cosa.

Le paso el ordenador con el artículo recién acabo y se toma su tiempo leyendo y de mientras yo me fijo en su cara. Me muerdo las uñas y muevo un pie nerviosa

Cuando termina levanta la cabeza hacia a mi y me mira fijamente.

-No voy a publicarlo sin tu consentimiento, solo- Me encojo de hombros- Quería escribir...

-Es muy bueno, amor

-¿Si?- Pregunto insegura.

-Si

-Después de todos estos meses, lo mal que lo habéis pasado y ahora encima lo de ayer quería hacer algo para ayudar en algo o por lo menos que sepan la verdad de todo.

Me hace levantarme y me abraza dándome un beso en el pelo

-Sí, si eso sale podría hacer daño

-Lo sé, les comenté a Mayca y Sandra lo que iba a escribir y me dijeron lo mismo pero que me lo pensara.

-Hay gente que se pondrá en tu contra como periodista- Dice ella

-Joder, lo sé pero es surrealista, yo soy la mala por publicar la verdad pero él... - Me muerdo el labio de la impotencia- Solo quiero ayudaros a vosotras, que salgais ganando por una vez. Me importa una mierda la fama, el dinero, los comentarios o si sale mal el desprestigio.

-Publicalo- Suelta después de unos minutos en silencio- Después de lo de "las 15" y lo de Mapi, Patri y Pina puede ayudar mucho.

-¿Estás segura? Puedes recibir mierda tu también y no quiero eso bajo ningún concepto.

-¿Qué más da eso? Estoy acostumbrada a las críticas y yo ya he intentado mediar en toda esta situación. Es hora de atacar y no de defender.

-Te amo, lo sabes ¿no?- Digo orgullosa de ella.

-Yo más- Me besa.

Le cojo la mano para mirar la hora y son las 6:30 de la mañana

-Es una buena hora para ver el mundo arder ¿no cres?

-Dale caña- Dice y en 3 minutos esta publicado- Ahora volvamos a la cama que quedan 2 horas para levantarse.

Suelto un bostezo

-Por favor

Me tumbo encima suya y me acaricia la espalda por debajo de la camiseta

En los 10 minutos que estamos así escuchamos ambos móviles arder

-Apaga eso porfa- Le pido con los ojos medio cerrados

Me quedo dormida en cuestión de segundos.

-Nena, despierta- Me susurran en el oído.-Hay que levantarse

-Nooo, ¿porqué en el cielo también hay que madrugar?- Pregunto- Se supone que el mundo a ardido y estoy muerta.

Balbuceo agarrándome más a ella y su pecho sube y baja de la risa.

-Venga, mi amor, hay que ir a desayunar- Levanto la cabeza y gimo

-Aguafiestas- Hago un puchero y me besa- ¿Has dormido más?

-No, prefería ver a mi preciosa mujer dormir y ver cómo se le caía la baba

La fulmino con la mirada

-Yo no babeo

-Lo que tu digas, mi amor- Besa mi frente y se levanta de la cama, antes de que pueda alejarse le doy una palmada en el culo.

Cojo el móvil y veo cuentos de notificaciones

-¿A ti también te ha estallado el móvil? - Pregunto mirándola

-Si

-¿Has visto algo?

-No, quería hacerlo contigo- Responde ya vestida y se echa otra vez en la cama pero esta vez a mi lado.

Enciendo el móvil y me meto primero en Twitter.

"Wow, como puede ese espécimen decirle eso a la mejor jugadora del mundo?"

"Menuda periodista... ¿Cómo puede grabar una conversación privada y luego encima publicarlo?"

"#VildaOut"

"Enamorada de esta periodista. Necesitamos más periodistas reales que se involucren y no que miren su propio beneficio"

"Hay que hacerle una estatua a T/n en Barcelona"

"#VildaOut ojalá y te pudras cabrón"

Y así miles de comentarios positivos y negativos.

-Hay muchos comentarios positivos y defendiéndonos- Comenta Ale también mirando con su móvil

-Es que como se pongan a defender a ese...

"T/n es la ostia, me encanta como periodista y persona. Tiene valores y los defiende y encima está con Alexia y hacen una pareja súper bonita 😍. #VildaOut"

-Estoy totalmente de acuerdo con esta chica- Dice Ale después de leer el comentario.

"La FIFA ha abierto un expediente contra el seleccionador español Jorge Vilda por los insultos y menosprecios hacia sus jugadoras"

Leo en voz alta el comunicado oficial de la FIFA y miro a mi mujer con esperanza.

-Hemos conseguido algo- Dice sonriendo

-Llegaremos a más- Le aseguro y me levanto de la cama para empezar a prepararme.

-Ojalá tengas razón

-¿Cuándo no la tengo?- Le guiño un ojo

Los próximos días fueron un caos, las malas miradas, malas palabras, la agresividad que tenía el técnico hacia las jugadoras en los entrenos y las entrevistas.

Alexia por fin dió su primera entrevista en el Mundial y me quedé con 2 frases.

"Quisimos hacerlo por las buenas, dialogando y negociando, pero no nos hicieron caso y nos tacharon de niñatas inmaduras, ha salido a la luz la verdad, que van a hacer ahora ¿seguir ignorandonos? ¿Seguir diciendo que somos unas niñatas inmaduras?"

"Siempre hemos estado solas, luchamos solas y nos caemos solas y si ganamos lo haremos solas de momento si las cosas no cambian"

Lo único bueno que ha salido de todo esto de momento es que las jugadoras se unieron más que nunca, todas "las 15" que no estaban viajaron a Nueva Zelanda para apoyar la causa

El partido contra Japón fue la gota que colmó el vaso. La contundente derrota contra una selección importante y competitiva fue lo que terminó con Jorge Vilda

Horas después estaba fuera y a las 2 días la nueva entrenadora llegó al país, Natalia Arroyo.

"Las 15" que no fueron convocadas ahora lo estaban y ya se podía decir que España jugaba con sus mejores jugadoras, que tenía un nuevo líder y que ya estaban los cambios esperados. No podían fallar ahora o quedarían realmente mal.

Natalia solo tuvo 3 días para preparar el partido contra Suiza con un equipo totalmente nuevo y desconocido pero lo hizo estupendamente y eso se reflejó en el resultado 4-0 doblete de Alexia, uno de Jenni y otro de Mapi.

-Alexia- Estamos en zona mixta- ¿Cuáles son tus sensaciones de este partido?

-Pues estoy muy contenta, individualmente tengo muy buenas sensaciones con la pierna y creo que ha sido mi mejor partido hasta el momento y espero seguir sumando más y más minutos- Sonrie sinceramente y yo no puedo evitar hacerlo orgullosa de ella y eso se capta en la cámara, si no estuviera esta última encendida ya me hubiera abalanzado encima de ella- Y colectivamente creo que hemos estado bien defensivamente y ofensivamente, obviamente hay cosas que mejorar pero aún trabajando con una nueva entrenadora nos estamos entendiendo muy bien y estamos muy satisfechas con eso.

-Cuéntame Alexia, ¿cómo es trabajar con una entrenadora nueva? Y no sólo eso, adaptarse rápido porque estais en un mundial y cada fallo se nota.- Le pongo el micrófono en la boca y doy un pasito disimuladamente hacia ella, rozandonos levemente.

-Bueno, es una muy buena entrenadora, algo a lo que no estábamos acostumbradas en España. He tenido el placer de jugar contra su equipo con el Barça y realmente sabe lo que hace- Mientras dice esto disimuladamente acaricia la parte baja de un lateral de ni cintura.

Sabe lo que anhelo el contacto fisico ahora mismo.

-Y ha puesto muy fácil el que nos adaptemos. Creo que hablo en nombre de todo el equipo que estamos muy contentas con ella- Finaliza ella

-Ahora la última-Vuelvo a ponerme el micrófono en la boca- Todos hemos visto esa asistencia de Patri con el primer gol, como habeis jugado de memoria y te la a colocado a la perfección para ti- Antes de que pueda formular la pregunta empieza a hablar así que rápido le doy el micro.

-¿Qué te puedo decir de Patri? MVP de la final de la Champions, marcando esos dos goles que nos volvían a meter dentro del partido, llevamos muchos años, demasiados- Se rie- jugando juntas, nos conocemos a la perfección y jugar con ella es un regalo. He extrañado mucho este año jugar con ella y con las demas- Admite- Es una buena amiga, una buena compañera y una muy buena jugadora, solo que está infravalorada.

-Muchas gracias, Alexia- La despido

-Gracias a ti, T/n

Cuando se que han cortado el directo me abalanzo sobre ella y agarra mis piernas para que no me caiga.

-Estoy tan orgullosa de ti, bebé- Le doy besos por toda la cara.

La sonrisa de la capitana desde que ha terminado el partido no se le ha ido pero ahora la tiene más grande

-Gracias, amor- Me besa lentamente- El primero es para tí

-A sido wowww- Me pongo fan loca- Esa conexión que teneis y ese pasecito... Me enamorado 100 veces más como fan y como mujer- Estoy fuera de si.

Suelta una risa nasal y me da un beso en la nariz.

-Relájate, nena, te va a dar un paro cardíaco

-Pues lo que me causais cada vez que os veo jugar

Niega divertida.

Lo que no sabíamos es que Sandra estaba grabando ese momento y horas después estaba en redes. A ninguna le importó, no era que escondieramos nuestra relación y había quedado demasiado bonito conmigo como mujer fan loca.

Y eso se vio en los miles de comentarios que tenía aunque siempre tiene que haber comentarios feos.

España jugó contra Holanda en cuartos y contra Inglaterra en semis quedando 1-0 y 2-1 respectivamente.

Vencer a las inglesas fue un golpe sobre la mesa con respecto al Europeo pasado y haciendo historia, era la primera vez que España llevaba tan lejos en un mundial con la absoluta.

Todos estabamos eufóricos fanáticos, jugadoras, prensa, familiares... Y no era para menos, habían cambiado la historia de España y les estaban dando un futuro a las próximas generaciones para que sólo se tengan que preocupar por jugar.

Y aquí estaba, peleándome con otros periodistas de otras editoriales para poder entrevistar a Alexia la primera

Todos estaban como locos por entrevistar a la mejor jugadora del mundo y la que dió la victoria 2-0 a España contra Estados Unidos.

-Ahora con nosotros tenemos a Alexia Putellas, la mejor jugadora del mundo, la MVP de este partido y la que ha dado la victoria a España en esta final contra Estados Unidos- Presento mientras la veo caminando hacia mi ignorando a todos los otros periodistas, casi casi corriendo.

Cuando llega y entra en el plano de la camara se puede captar su mirada cristalina, su sonrisa enorme y su respiración un poco agitada.

Vino justo después de finalizar el partido asi que todavía no había levantado la Copa.

-Alexia, dime como s... - No me deja seguir.

Se abalanza besándome con las manos en mi cintura, sorprendida la correspondo pero enseguida enredo mis manos en su cuello acercandola más.

Se separa y su sonrisa increíblemente es más grande que con la que ha llegado y me da otro beso antes de hablar a la cámara.

-Estoy eufórica, como ya se podrá ver- Se rie y me mira fijamente- Estoy muy muy feliz, después de un año tan complicado para mi y para mí familia con la lesión, todos los momentos malos que hemos tenido... - Para al ver cómo se me cae una lágrima y me la quita suavemente- Todo esto es para ellas, para mi, para mis compañeras, para el equipo y por supuesto para la afición y sobre todo para esa gente que nunca a dejado de apoyarnos

-Has dado los dos goles de la victoria, ¿que tienes que decir?

-Yo he metido esos goles si, pero esto es en equipo. Todas hemos echo nuestro trabajo y hemos recogido el fruto

-Muchas gracias, Alexia- Digo- Ahora ves a recoger esa medalla y esa copa y a celebrar la victoria.

-Gracias a vosotras, T/n- Dice- Ahora si me lo permitis me voy a llevar a mi mujer.

Coge mi mano y despidiéndose con la mano de la cámara me lleva con ella.

-Te amo- Le digo besandola

-Yo más

-Ahora ves a recoger esa copa y levantala muy alto- Le ordeno y le doy una palmada en el culo- Campeona del mundo

Me guiña un ojo antes de irse corriendo con las chicas.

[inspiredwriter]

Stefany 2018, Anastasia 2018 and April 2018 :*entra a la habitación*

Stefany 2018 : Raph, ya llegamos recibimos tu mensaje de emergencias😕📱⛑️ ¿Qué sucedió los chicos ? 😟🤨

Raph 2018 :*acostado en la pared* bueno lo llamé para que cuidan mis hermanos están enfermos 🙄🤒Gracias a mi papá Qué es contagió y tiene siete etapas de la gripe😔🤧

Anastasia 2018 : enserio Raph no creemos que esa fiebre sea muy grave de contagiarnos 😟🤨(pensamientos💭) Oh espero que Mikey no estoy demasiado enfermo tendré que cuidado bien Con cariño para que sane😤🥺💓💞💗🩷

Raph 2018 :*abre la cortina* no realmente Ellos están protegidos en su cuarto de cuarentena para que no se contagien 😁😉🚪 Oh y también hay que echar le desinfectante para que se recupere😏😊🧴⛑️

Leo 2018, Mikey 2018 and Donnie 2018 :*rociando el desinfectante* Raph ya nos echaste mucho Nos hace demasiado calor 🤒🤧🥵💦

April 2018 : Oh dios se ven completamente enfermos😲😟🤒 ¿desde cuándo van a recuperarse? 🤔🤨

Raph 2018 : no lose, Donnie dijo que la enfermedad de la grité se debe quitarse sola🤔😌 Solo quiero que ustedes no lo saquen de sus habitacion de cuarentena si no las contagiarnos 😬🤒💦*sale de la habitación * si me disculpas tengo que ir a mi papá y encontrarlo para que no enferme a nadie😤😒🚫🤒

Stefany 2018 :*se acerca a Leo* Oh mi pobre tortuguita está muy enfermita 🥺😚💗💖💞💘¿cómo te siente Lee? 😟💗💕🩷

Leo 2018 :*se limpia la nariz con el pañuelo* Hola mi amor No te preocupes por mí Estoy bien 🤧😁💓💕❣️¿Por qué no me sacas de ahí para que puedas darte un lindo abrazo? 😙🤗🩷💞💗💝

Stefany 2018 :*se sonroja* Me encantaría mucho pero Raph dijo que no te puedo sacar sino me enfermaras 🥰😅🚫🤒💞💗💖💕

Mikey 2018 :*se acerca a Anastasia* Achu~😫🤧💦Anastasia, por favor quiero que me saques de aquí para estar contigo y dame tus Besos para que me sienta mejor 🥺😚💖💘💓💕

Anastasia :*pone su mano en la puerta protectora* mi querido príncipe sí estás tan enfermo como lo pensé😟😱💖💞💝❣️ No te preocupes yo te voy a cuidar de bien 🥰😉💗💝💘💞

April 2018 :*revisa su teléfono* bueno, Raph nos mandó la información del efecto de la gripe🫤😕📱 que ya los chicos superon una etapa 1 etapa 2 y están en la etapa 3 capitán abracitos 🤔🤒

Donnie 2018 :*golpea la puerta Proctera* Así es cielo y tú sabes que los abrazos podrían curarme y sentirme mejor con tu gran amor 😏😍💗💘💖¡¡Achu!! 😩🤧💦

April 2018: I'm terribly sorry, Don Bon, but I can't go into your protective room and hug you now🥺💓💘🩷💞 Just wait until you get better and I will hug you as much as you want😉🥰💗💖💝💕

Mikey 2018: *Knocks hands on security door* But we need hugs right now!😫💓❣️💖💕 We've never asked you for anything, girls, but we really really need you!!🥺😩💘💗💞

Leo 2018: Stefany, if you don’t want to come to me to hug me, then I’ll get to you myself😞😤🗡💓💞💘💝 *Takes out a sword, cuts the security door and runs outside*

Stefany 2018: Leo, what are you doing?!😨😱 You are still very weak, you cannot leave the room😰🚫🏃‍♂️😷🤒💝💗❤💕

April 2018: *Steps back* Ohh, this is the beginning of the fourth stage of the flu, it is called “Ninja Supreme”, when the patient begins to track down his partner and hunt him like a ninja😰💦🥷✨

Anastasia 2018: Seriously?!😱 In that case, there must be a stage where a poor turtle with a sore throat starts singing karaoke?!😠😤👨‍🎤🎶

April 2018: How did you guess about this, sis?😲🤨 This is the fifth stage of the flu...🤔😐😷🦠

Stefany 2018: Ehh, girls, it seems to me that we will soon need gauze masks...😥😷

Mikey 2018 and Donnie 2018: *Cuts the security doors with their weapons and goes outside* Let's start the hunt~😈😈💓💘💖💞

@swagreecrow

[kaicheri]

mirror, mirror.

sub!beomgyu x softdom afab!reader

warnings: trainee au, implied masturbation (m), oral (f), exhib./voy. themes, degradation, praise, handjob (w/ mirror)

wc: 3.8k

a/n: repost 1! 

>>>>

8:27 AM

There he is.

Beomgyu said he’d be in the dance practice room to get some extra practice early in the morning, so you decided to head over and join him. You could use the extra practice yourself before the other trainees show up later on.

You know that he’s a punctual boy who’s working hard to debut, so seeing his blurry figure through the door’s little window tugs at the corners of your lips. 

You couldn’t be more proud.

But you did expect to see him, you know, dancing. Right now, he’s just sitting on the ground with his legs spread apart, facing the mirror? Is he resting, perhaps? And with his stupid black hoodie hanging on the other side of the door and covering the glass, you can’t really make out much of the view inside.

For real, what is he doing? 

When you squint and use what’s best given to you from this dumb angle, you can at least peep a black mini tripod set up with his phone attached, seemingly sitting between his legs.

Ohh, maybe he’s monitoring his dance progress. The fans he’s accumulated through trainee vlogs and reality shows would be so proud of how much he’s grown.

But enough of your little mind tangent. You’re curious and excited of what he’s gotten down so far.

“Beomgyu!” 

At your unexpected—and unwanted—surprise entry, Beomgyu’s shoulders shoot up as if he’s been struck by lightning. And within microseconds, he’s curled up in this awkward ass siting position where his legs are retracted into his chest. Even weirder when you notice one of his arms hastily slip in between them at the last second. 

“Don’t get any closer!” he yells hoarsely, throwing a hand up to stop you as he hides his flushed self. You immediately freeze in place at the sudden outburst. 

The timid boy doesn’t even turn around to throw you a simple glance, or greet you brightly like he always does when you two see each other. Maybe you came in a bit too hard. 

“Woah, woah, you—y’good?” You slowly approach him with your hands and eyebrows up, signaling that it’s going to be okay, and Beomgyu clears his throat, probably realizing that he’ll give himself away if he doesn’t choose the right cards. Damn, he was so close too. 

With a quick gulp, he keeps his eyes down as he throws a tight smile over his shoulder in your direction. 

“Y-yeah...I-I’m fine…” he mumbles, obviously lying straight through his pearly whites. For a moment that feels like eternity, you want to figure out what’s wrong, but some dumb, invisible-like force is preventing you from…whatever it is you’re supposed to be doing. This whole thing is just weird—he is weird, and not the good kind of weird, which he normally is.

You can’t blame him for being so on his toes, though, not when debut’s just around the corner.

So, you brush it off and resume your walk towards his area with an anticipant gleam in your eyes and a small smile, which you may or may not be forcing yourself. “Sooo...what’re you up to?”

“I’m, uh, f-filming!” Beomgyu huffs out exaggeratedly, as if to overcompensate for his missing extroversion. “Y-yeah, filming something for the fans…” 

Just when you think he can’t be more tense, his voice goes a bit higher in pitch every step you take towards him. 

And why are his eyes darting around like a sinner? God, what is he so nervous for? 

But then again, he does have the camera all set up and it seems to be on, so that could be why. He’s probably filming a short talking clip to post and is nervous to do it.

Except when you get close enough, he just looks all defensive and weird, chewing on his bottom lip as he watches you intently from under his locks.

He looks a bit freaky, like he’s about to pounce on you or something, or vice versa—but just then, your eyes meet his in the mirror, before trailing down just enough for you realize what he was in the middle of.

You had just interrupted his little session.

Keeping your face as natural as possible, as if you don’t have an ounce of suspicion, you figure it might be time to claim your Oscar—y’know, in case this idol thing doesn’t work out.

“Shit!” Maybe your gasp was more dramatic than you’d intended, but it does the trick. “I totally forgot—did they call my number?” You pull out a piece of crumpled paper from your pocket, so conveniently set up for this very moment. “Hurry and finish, I’ll be in the cafeteria!”

And with that daring performance, you quickly turn on your feet and dash out of the dance practice room, holding in your fist a piece of paper with nothing scribbled on it, and a mental image of Beomgyu’s pitiful cock in his.

————————————————————————

8:43 AM - Cafeteria

How long does it take for that boy to finish? Well, clearly long enough to flood your brain with questions that may never be answered—crazy enough to trigger voices as well, debating on whether it was worth training this hard for this long, just to catch a fellow trainee touching himself.

And in a setting so risky, so public—for anyone to walk in—has he gone mad? Debut’s doing a lot more than just fuck with his mind, that’s for sure.

You nearly choke on some boba when your eyes land on a certain someone’s ridiculously tall figure. Fucking finally. 

Closing it behind him cautiously, Beomgyu walks down the corridor in your direction, pretending to be scrolling on his phone. And all of a sudden, every question you were sure to have forgotten, comes punching right in. Can you even still look at him in the eyes? How could you see him the same after this? Did he even wash his fucking hands before he touched that handle-

Beomgyu timidly nods at you to acknowledge your simple existence and takes a seat on the opposite side of your small table, eyes immediately darting to the bubble tea in your hands before pointing at it. 

“Yah, give me a sip.”

He doesn’t give you a chance to respond, already extending his hand out to reach for it.

Scoffing, you tuck the drink towards your chest and away from his dirty hand. Can you believe the gall of this boy? The nerve?

Your eyes travel from his hand to his confused face, nose twitching up in disgust.

“Gyu, I can’t believe you…” You lean towards him enough to whisper, “You sly ass fox...” 

But then again, his amazing ability to act innocent when he’s not has always been a mystery to you. You’ve seen his pranks on the others. 

“What? I forgot to bring my wallet, okay?” He tries to explain, shamelessly reaching for the bubble tea in your grasp yet again. “But if you give me some now, I promise I’ll buy you whatever you want next time. Deal?”

He...he’s really trying to negotiate with you right now? Like nothing had just happened? Like you totally weren’t gonna walk in on him with his cock in hand, cum about to spurt everywhere?

“Since when do you have a wallet-“ You roll your eyes with a sigh, “Anyway, that’s not what I’m talking about.” 

You give the cafeteria a quick scan to make sure no one’s in hearing proximity. 

“I know…” you pause for a second, preparing for the wave of awkwardness to wash over the both of you, “…look, I know you were…touching yourself.”

How did you get here again?

“But don’t be alarmed-“ you start, but his eyes widen immediately and he almost chokes on spit.

“I- I don’t know what you’re talking about-”

“Don’t lie to me, Gyu- I can literally see the white stains on your fucking pants!” You whisper-yell, sharply pointing to the pitiful markings of his dried up dick milk for proof. Is he oblivious, or just stupid?

At the point, his eyes are practically bulging out of his brain and that speaks for itself.

“You’re not fooling me,” you lean back with crossed arms.

Given that he could freeze time and think about it, he could’ve played those stains out to be anything. But anxiety’s already pouring into his brain about his future, and what would become of it if you went around telling everybody.

Beomgyu quickly blocks his crotch area from your view with his hands and mutters a curse under his breath. He’s so childish, it’s amusing. Being this dramatic won’t get him anywhere.

“Explain yourself, hm? Explain why I almost walked in on you and your alone time—in the practice room, no less.”

All of a sudden, the boy slips off his seat and presents himself on his knees, hanging his head in shame and clamping his hands together. You’d tell him to quit it, but this is getting…pretty interesting. It’s kind of a shame more people aren’t here to witness him like this, though. He’s a total wreck. 

“Y/n, please don’t tell anyone,” he desperately begs, boring into your eyes with his big brown ones until you can see the glossiness thicken. “Please, please don’t…”

Poor guy sounds like he’s about to cry at any second, and your pussy weirdly pulses at the sight.

“Relax, it’s perfectly normal. You don’t have to be ashamed.”

You pause to sigh in annoyance, “But did you have to do it there? In our practice room? Come on, isn’t that too much?”

Beomgyu darts his tongue out to wet his dry lips,“I- I know I shouldn’t have….but I just…I just couldn’t help it…you know, we haven’t had enough time between monthly evaluations and stuff…” he trails off, but you can’t help but notice the pretty pout that forms on his lips.

But you understand him. Horny and stressed? The worst duo.

Especially during these busy days, his roomies are in and out all the time, their schedules becoming more hectic and unpredictable—there’s no way he can find peace. And it’s not like he could spend too much time in the shower either. Too little time to spare, and too many things to do.

“No, yeah, I get it,” You nod, showing a bit of empathy for the poor boy. “Is this a normal thing for you?”

“No, it’s my first time- doing it in the practice room, I mean…” He mumbles and fidgets with his fingers.

“Yah, you- seriously…” you sigh, latching your lips back on the straw and he watches patiently, gulping. You could really use a nap right now, but not when he’s on his knees like this.

“You’re seriously lucky it was only me. What if it had been Kai? Or Soobin?” You gasp loudly as an even worse thought hits you, “Yeonjun…”

His hands cover both ears theatrically, shaking his head. “Don’t even-“

“Gyu, what were you thinking?”

“I…I just wanted to film myself…” he admits quietly with a bit of shame laced to it, and picks at his pretty fingers. “…s-see how it was like-”

“Film yourself? You mean like the ones on porn websites?” You have to laugh at him, so you let out a little snicker. How pathetic can he get? Surely, not more than this? “What are you, some kind of camgirl?”

Beomgyu looks dumb and miserable, pouting and pretty much begging for you to torture him. At this point, you could very well get him to do whatever you want. Besides, what do you get out of staying quiet?

“You know I’m not gonna keep my mouth shut.”

The instant shock on his face is priceless. He probably thought you were gonna let him off the hook or something. Now, isn’t that stupid?

“Please don’t tell anyone, Y/n- please, please, please…” he begs, clammy hands rubbing together so pitifully as he scoots closer on his knees. “I- I’ll buy you boba every day!”

His eyes are just so, so pretty. How could you take him even a pinch seriously when he’s pleading for your mercy? At this point, you might even develop some sort of God complex if you haven’t already.

Because never in a million years would you ever think to have Beomgyu wrapped around your finger, so desperate in front of your eyes. Your very own slave. The thought alone sounds too good to back out now.

“And why shouldn’t I?” You coo, pouting in the feign of innocence.

He reaches out to take your free hand in his (cum-colored ones), but you let him, already consumed by the power you have over the boy. He rubs over it gently, looking up at you with tears forming at the corners.

“Y/n, please…the others—they won’t let me breathe…it’ll be so embarrassing…”

He’s not wrong. But that’s why it’ll be fucking hilarious. The whole company would be throwing around “mirror fucker” or “camboy.”

And what, he gets off on people watching him, too? Tsk, this is all too easy.

You simply shrug, still not getting the reaction you want. “Hm, not sure if it’s my problem-”

“Don’t tease me right now, Y/n, please!” He whines, “I’ll do anything- anything you want!”

Right into your trap.

“Oh? Anything?”

————

This really was all too easy. With some time left over before the rest come in, you have a kneeling Beomgyu settled obediently between your legs in the same practice room, but this time, you’ve decided to play a bit smarter—actually locking the door and dimming the lights, fully covering the window with his same black hoodie.

You glance at the camera sitting in the corner once more to see if it’s running, just as he’d requested. You could grant him this one thing, right?

Honestly, it makes you laugh, but if this could get him off until the next year, why not?

Leaning back on the chair, you teasingly move your panties to the side and his hungry eyes follow. “Let’s hurry before the others show up…but you’d probably like that, wouldn’t you? Having them watch me fuck your sweet, sweet mouth, yeah?”

With a hefty gulp, his tears start cornering his eyes again, cheeks reddening with the shock of arousal shooting down to his cock. Your words are so vulgar and dirty, and it affects him so much. Who knew he’d get off on being used?

But Beomgyu is a good boy, and has manners, keeping his hands stationed on his thighs. He’d rather wait for your permission than act on his lusty impulses.

“Okay, baby. Stick your tongue out for me and make me cum.”

He scoots closer cutely, and it’s already killing you. The boy constantly chews on his lip and gives you one last look before he gently spreads your legs apart.

You could melt right now. He’s so fucking cute just resting his hands on your thighs, and the moment he lays his warm tongue on your slit, his pretty, teary eyes shoot up to gauge at your reaction, looking all innocent while he begins kitten licks here and there.

They become longer stripes as he drags the tip of his tongue gently up and down your neediness, but you’re starting to feel a bit impatient. “Gyu, we don’t have time to play games right n-“

Your own gasp cuts you off when he presses his lips against your dainty bud, sucking so lightly, so eagerly, you can’t help but grab a handful of his hair. “O-oh god…that’s it, just like that…”

Beomgyu gives your clit a break and goes back to dragging his tongue up and down your folds. It’s a simple motion, but this time he’s applying a bit more pressure with his tongue to show how needy he is for your sweet taste.

His lips are slobbered with all sorts—you’re starting to wonder if he’d just wanted this all along.

“Holy sh-shit…you’re s-so good at this,” you breathe out, and the praise makes him whimper, “Maybe you should be my very own personal slut, Gyu…I’d fuck your pretty mouth every day…”

Beomgyu can’t do much about his poor, leaking cock, just throbbing in the tight of his pants. To keep himself from touching it, he squeezes your thighs to hold back, and because it’s not his time yet. Pitiful, but his purpose now is to make you feel good.

Just as you’re getting lost in how pretty he looks between your legs, he angles his head in attempt to press his tongue in deeper, digging out the source of your sweet essence.

“I mean…if this what it feels like to have you eat me out…imagine what riding your face must be like…” Beomgyu’s eyes flutter at the idea and doesn’t even care about all the drool running down his chin.

“Stick out your tongue so I can fuck myself with it.” He obeys and sticks it out for you. It’s convenient, because he can watch your pretty face contort as you guide his head back and forth, letting his tongue dip into you as you please.

His teary eyes are so angelic and innocent in nature, you could pass out. Everything about him is so puppy-like, obedient and vulnerable—so easy to corrupt.

You feel the rapid tightening in your abdomen as you get closer to the edge, so you move his head a bit faster, gripping a little harder that he whimpers.

“Let me cum in your p-pretty little mouth, yeah?”

It’s when he whimpers one more time that you fall apart. At this point, your legs are locking his head in and you’re pushing his face into your cunt to keep him there. You might be suffocating him with your convulsing thighs, but like a good boy, he waits on his knees patiently and lets you fuck his face until you’ve calmed down from your ecstasy.

It’s a comforting sight, really, to see your good boy, with his teary eyes ever so pretty and hair all fluffy and disheveled the moment your legs loosen up around him. Even when he’s catching his breath, he looks adorable.

You reach out to run your hand through his hair and he takes it with love. “You’re such a boy for me.”

Beomgyu can’t help but yelp when you abruptly pull him up to slam his chest against the mirror. He’s so lightweight, you could throw him around like some pretty doll.

A cute cry slips out as soon as you ram your leg up against his ass to keep him against his own reflection.

With your arm snaking around his pretty, dainty waist, all tight and secure, you shoot him a warning grin just before you give him what he wants.

“Oh, is this where you came earlier?” You scoff at his pathetic attempt at cleaning up the stains on the mirror. “How fucking dirty of you.”

You hand slips down past his waistline without warning and his body jolts at the sudden intrusion, taking in his delicious sobs when you pull his pretty, throbbing cock out.

“Filming for the fans, huh? Maybe next time you go live, I’ll make you take out your dirty cock in front of everyone and make you touch yourself…so that everyone can see what a stupid little whore you really are, yeah?”

His eyes flutter back and lips part against the mirror as you spread his precum all over his bulbous tip, whimpering because he wants to hear more of your sin.

“You’d like that, wouldn’t you?”

Stupidly, Beomgyu nods with breath hitting the mirror. He just wants you so bad, he’s starting to lose it.

“Or maybe I’ll suck you off in front of everyone, show them how pretty you look when you cum in my mouth…” your devilish coo causes him to buck forward, needing your fingers now more than ever. It feels like he’s in heaven—or hell, because of your teasing—with the way your hand slides up and down his cock with ease.

It’s no doubt that your touch is different from his own, clearly slower and more calculated, whereas his is sloppy and desperate. If he had known you were this good with his cock, he would’ve gotten caught earlier.

Already, his cock twitches over the insane amount of pleasure you’re giving him. Drool starts bubbling at his mouth and shamelessly seeps past his lips, dripping down his chin and smearing the mirror.

“Look at yourself, baby. Don’t you like watching yourself get fucked?” Beomgyu nods profusely, and pries his eyes open to take a look at himself, cheeks all pink and face all fucked out because of you.

He whines and bites down on his lip immediately when you pick up the pace, careful to keep his volume under control. It appears he’s become so stupid that he’s forgotten the walls are soundproof. And by the way he claws at the mirror and throbs between your fingers, you can tell he’s dangerously close.

“And you were filming yourself, pfft,” You scoff, “I’d be ashamed too. How disgusting.”

Your words hurt, but has his cock leaking regardless. It just feels so good, along with how his sensitive, puffy tip presses against the mirror as you rub him off.

“Please, p-please let me c-cum, Y/n…” he quietly cries against the mirror, voice bending at your pumps, “oh, please…”

“Mm, you’ve been such a good boy. Look at yourself when you cum for me,” you coo, going at a vigorous pace and he whimpers in obedience, prying open his big teary eyes.

But right when he’s about to lose it, he mindlessly locks eyes with you once more in the mirror, letting you witness the last of his innocence flow out of his eyes.

“F-fuck…please-” He whimpers and squishes his lips against the mirror, “I-I…m’cumming-“

You hold his trembling body close to yours, right around his waist as his hot, milky cum shoots out from its pocket, splattering onto the mirror in almost the same place.

“God, you look so cute like this…getting ruined all for some stupid video…” you pant against his shoulder as you squeeze him out completely.

With stained fingers of white, he watches you suck them off from under his heavy eyelids. A little taste of his saltiness shouldn’t hurt.

You help the poor boy slump down against a clean part of the mirror. He looks close to passing out, or needing sleep—anything that would help him recover from…all of this.

“You did so well, Gyu,” you coo sweetly, hoping something else might bloom out of this little episode.

But when you turn to walk over to the camera, you realize the usual orange light isn’t blinking anymore.

“Oh my god…” The screen’s gone completely black.

“It died.”

[peachyyy1234]

esumen: tomas la virginidad de Coriolanus Nota del autor: espero que les guste esta publicación, es la primera vez que escribo, no juzgues, también lo siento si me pierdo el deletreo, el inglés no es mi primer idioma, amo a tu autora, olivia, espero que te guste Advertencia de contenido seaxual en el sexo del coño comiéndose a alguien

Eran alrededor de las 11 de la noche, ¿dónde está tu mejor amigo, Coriolanus Snow?, en la casa para estudiarlos, ustedes dos han sido cercanos durante años "No entiendo esta pregunta estúpida", dices frustrado, "no es tan difícil", dice Coriolanus " para ti no lo es" dices mirándolo mientras él suspira y cierras tu libro "¿Qué tal si hacemos algo divertido?" dices. "Como qué", dice. Te levantas y caminas hacia él "um, se me ocurren algunas cosas" dices coqueto, lo agarras por el color y lo acercas a ti "¿qué estás haciendo?" dice coriolano confundido lo besas

Coriolanus mientras se corre dentro de tu coño, "ahhh, me estoy acabando, ahhahh, joder, ahhh", dices, te corres mientras tus paredes se cierran sobre la polla de Coriolanus. te golpea el trasero apenas cuando llegas al clímax, te sales de él y te acuestas a su lado "joder, eso estuvo bien corio" dices que no dice nada y comienza a jugar con tu coño hinchado "ahh corio, no puedo" dices gimiendo "sí, puedes, bebé", dice que comienza a mover sus dedos más rápido en un círculo o Clint "ahh", tú gimes, grita, él inserta un jengibre dentro de tu coño hinchado mientras tú gimes fuerte, él quita su dedo e inserta su lengua, tú gimes como Él, él, cierra el interior de tu coño, inserta un dedo "ahh Dios mío, joder", se quita la lengua e inserta otro dedo mientras mueve su dedo rápido en tu coño "más rápido, más rápido, bebé ahhh", dices gimiendo "Me voy a correr". Me voy a correr, joder "dices lloriqueando" Me estoy acabando ahhhh "uph dices mientras gimes mientras

Él se retira sorprendido y avergonzado, pero luego te devuelve el beso. Lo empujas sobre su cama y te pones encima de él "Nunca he-" estaba diciendo Coriolanus hasta que lo interrumpiste "no te preocupes" dices que lo besas, te retiras y te quitas la camisa dejándote en tu encaje. sujetador negro los ojos de coriolano se abren mucho, te comió. Me sorprende que nunca te haya visto tan hermosa antes de quitarle los pantalones, dejándolo en ropa interior, también te quitas los pantalones, dejándote en las bragas y el sujetador, vuelves a ponerte encima. él y mueve lentamente tus caderas alrededor de coriolanus, soltemos un fuerte látigo mientras gimes "más rápido", dice coriolanus así que haz lo que te dice y te mueves rápido dejando escapar un látigo muy fuerte de él y un gemido tuyo, él te agarra espera para hacerte para "qué" dices confundido "quítate las bragas y mete mi polla en tu coño" dice exigente para que hagas lo que te dice le arrancas la ropa interior y le quitas las bragas le acaricias lentamente la polla él azota suavemente "Yo "Voy a poner tu polla en mi coño ahora, está bien", él asiente lentamente, pones su polla dentro de tu coño gimiendo fuerte, él susurra "eso se siente tan lindo, ahora monta mi polla, bebé", comienzas a mover tus caderas gimiendo, él desliza su mano por tu espalda. para quitarte el sostén del culo, montas la polla, él te mira mientras montas su polla "oh joderkkkk ahhh" eres un látigo montando la polla de corios "ese es el lugar bebé, ohh sí, eso es todo" coriolano dice gimiendo, empiezas a acelerar ese ritmo ahora tu coño saltando arriba y abajo su polla sobre la suya espera el otro apretando tus tetas le encanta la forma en que rebotan "Estoy cerca", dice "Dios mío, dice que va a besarte y se acuesta a tu lado

[chifourmi]

Maintenant quand je vois un couple je me surprends à me dire "ohh ils sont adorables" et plus "beurk trop cucul ça me dégoûte", marrant

(25/04/2024)

[marshmallow--shark]

For the character ask game

Chakotay

Oh thank you for the ask and thank you for choosing my lovely Chakotay as the subject!

How I feel about this character

If anyone can't already tell, I love Chakotay, I love him so much! Chakotay is a sweet guy who wants to help people which leads to him getting betrayed and used constantly. He's not afraid to stand up and fight when he needs to. Very susceptible to suggestion/mind control, which is what caused me to fall for him in the first place.

All the people I ship romantically with this character

A- All? Ohh boy. I'll do my best to remember it all but Chakotay is like creamer to everyone's tea, he goes great with everyone. Not including crossover ships:

Janeway, Seska, Paris, Kim, Torres, Doctor, Neelix, Tuvok, Kes, Seven, Annorax, Teero, Suder, Starling, Carey, Kashyk, Moset, Tabor, Rudolph Ransom, Burke, Penk, Iden, Warship Chakotay, Mirror Chakotay, hologram Chakotay from Voy 3.25 & Dal.

My non-romantic OTP for this character

I err.. don't ship unromantically so I've got nothing here.

My unpopular opinion about this character

Chakotay is unfairly hated. His writing and acting is good in Voyager, it's just subtle! Or the fact that it took for Prodigy to make people like him. In my humble opinion, If you didn't like him in Voyager, you don't deserve him at all.

One thing I wish would happen / had happened with this character in canon.

Well I could say something obvious like I wish he got together with Janeway but I'm gonna go for something different like, I wish he dated Torres. I'm aware that none of my slash ships could happen because of the times but Chakorres had so much fuel with her crush on him and she had a dirty dream where she tops him! I'd even have been fine if they broke up in the end but they should have happened, Chakorres had so much potential!

M- My, you got me so passionate there. But I could just talk about my sweet Chakotay forever.

[stellarred]

Something that just baffled me about the handful of scenes I did see--unfortunately, (much to my profound regret and near irreversible brain damage )--of those ridiculous, crude, and rude VOY episodes, was the matter of whether or not Q even considered that an annoyed and disgusted Janeway could tell Picard about his dumb attempts to flirt with her.

Did it ever occur to Q that she could eventually spill the beans to Jean-Luc?

Did he ever stop to think for a second that Picard could've been hurt by that?

Despite his stoic, ever serious image, we know Picard cared, and even loved Q (JDL said so).

Imagine the conversation Q would have with Picard if his capitaine had confronted him with what Janeway had told him.

THE DREADED MOMENT:

Picard: Is...Is this true?

Q: Uh. Well...

Picard: What happened, Q?

Q: Psychological block. I went insane one summer it seems, so I don't remember.

Picard:

Q: So, what's for dinner, mon mari?

Picard: Ohh, Q. Why?

Q:

Picard: Answer me.

Q: Why do I get the feeling I'm going to be sleeping on the sofa for the next decade or so?

SCREW YOU, VOYAGER.