#oh... my fucking god this is a long post im so sorry
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I. I. IM. I. HELLO?????????? HELLO. EXCUSE ME. HOLY SHIT. WHAT THE FUCK. (<- POSITIVE)
oh yeah addendum to my tags in that poll, it makes more sense if i put it this way : he'd run that shit like the navy at FIRST, and be super wound up about keeping everything in check, but as his sanity starts slipping his plans do as well. you know when a deadline gets closer and closer and you start frantically using whatever the first thing you think of is, and then in hindsight youre like "why did i make that decision??" thats what i feel like it is. like... panic/anxiety clouds the mind and makes you do stupid things. same thing with overconfidence. euphoria. lust. desperation. et cetera. decisions made in a short time limit/relying on instinct and feeling are often not the best
#guh. ghouhh. VISCERAL REACTION FROM ME I ACCIDENTALLY CHOKED ON MY SPIT GOD SAVE ME#PACES IN CIRCLES. JUST GIVE ME A SECOND TO PROCESS THE HORRORS I JUST WENT THROUGH#I DONT WANNA SOUND LIKE IM EXAGGERATING OR BEING DRAMATIC BUT HOLY SHIT. HOLY SHIT.#GENUINELY GENUINELY ABSOLUTELY CHILLING (<- PUN UNINTENDED AND FRANKLY SHAMEFULLY MADE)#prev ->#Also sorry if this is grim kjsjjd hopefully it’s not too bad#<- end prev#I MEAN. THATS HOW INTERACTIONS WITH THE DEMON ARE I DONT THINK ITS OVERKILL#AND ANYWAYS GOD. GOD. ITS SO.#okay im trying to contain my excitement right now (despite what it seems) but man. dude. holy fuck.#i WOULD spend my entire time talking about how this is so well written and cool but also i need to restrain myself JSNXJSXN#“im trying to have a conversation with my friends” <- implication that the lion is intruding on chils subconscious there? at least i think#actually that makes a lot of sense considering laios' first meeting with the lion is his dream#also honestly how dare you (positive) include laios trying to touch his shoulder oh my god. lies on the floor.#it doesnt work... not this time... its too late...#bangs my head against a wall. IM SORRY IM JUST GONNA START YAPPING FOR 40 PAGES LIKE I USUALLY DO ON UR POSTS BUT LIKE#“you were never listening to me you were just granting subconcious desires indiscriminately” AGH man. reminds me of how someone pointed out#how the succubi likely take advantage of desires you dont want to confront...#the feeling the lion got rid of... shame? guilt? remorse? absolutely JARRING how empty it leaves him. like... that was the last thing#holding together his sanity. his ability to feel regret#also. yknow. extremely visceral the way the party all reach for the place the demon fed on him from. its well intentioned but god it really#feels like an invasion#NOT TO DODGE AROUND THE ACTUAL EATING SCENE BY THE WAY. ITS JUST SO. SO. THAT I. I HAVE NOTHING TO SAY ABOUT IT THAT WOULDNT BE#WAY TOO PERSONAL IS ALL.#man. MAN#anyways last note. “overindulgence would just cause me more trouble in the long run” AGHHH AGHHHH I LOVE YOU. PARALLELS BETWEEN THE LION AN#THE CHARACTERS. GOD. KEELS OVER. CURLS UP ON THE FLOOR.#except the demon has all the power here it can manipulate most of whatever variables it wants to without consequence#AGAIN I DONT WANNA SOUND OVER-FLATTERING IM JUST GENUINELY. look ok like i said. restraining rn despite what it looks like. this is so cool#guhhh grrrghughurrg eats my hand.
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Bucky Barnes | Rebellion Series | Caution
Part one of the Rebellion Series
Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Reader
Plot: By some miracle, you get saved from the consequences of your own actions. You’re reluctant to join a supposedly good cause. What happens when the good cause is not so legal? And what - or who - is your soft spot?
Warnings: Angst, fluff (?) and mentions of sex.
Words: 34OO
You have started shaking again. With every tremble of your body, the restraints around your legs and arms seem to tighten and you shudder even more at the awful memory of that feeling. It took weeks for the shaking to stop. Weeks of being locked up into this modern dungeon until you were nothing but silence and numbness.
You knew the rebellion could end in death, knew the consequences would be catastrophic, but at least you’d stood for something, fought for something. And you would choose death any day over the endless silence of this prison. You know for a fact that you’re surrounded by an ocean, but no matter how hard you listen, you cannot hear the wild sea crash. Can only hear the low hum of the air being circulated through your metal cell.
And today, approximately three months after the start of your sentence in the most secured prison on the planet, you have started shaking again. It can hardly be because today of all days, your brain has decided to make you go completely insane. That would be too random. Which means–
Your head snaps to the window, spotting the other cells. Empty. This floor is reserved just for you alone. Because apparently you’re too dangerous to interact with anyone. They even got machines bringing you your daily sustenance. An empty floor like every other day, yet something seems different. Something’s off.
A metal door flies through the middle of the circular space connecting all of the cells and you stiffen. You look at the ground again, keeping completely still. Maybe they don’t know that you’re here. Oh God, oh God, oh God. No, they can’t get to you. Not again.
The destruction clangs through your body and you tremble violently, curling up as much as you can and staring hard at the floor. The cold metal ground blurs with images of the rebellion. The things you gave up, the energy your summoned and wasted, the people you lost. The blood, and pain, and screams and– and– and…
“She’s in there. Grab her and then we get out of here.”
“Steve, I–”
“And hurry up, we don’t have much time!”
Two combat boots step into your vision and the stomps echo in your head, booming you back to reality. But not quite. Your eyes vibrate with fear and you swallow the nails in your throat. Then a pair of knees appear in front of you and a black gloved hand reaches forward. It hesitates, then retreats. As if choosing not to touch you. Wise choice.
“Hey.” The voice is low. And smooth as liquor.
But you don’t look up, focusing on trying not to tremble more and taking the firm contraptions wrapped around your shins and forearms as the protection they now are. Maybe this is another nightmare. It’s different from the ones you usually have, but black gloves… They had black gloves, too. And those firm boots. They may have kicked you in the stomach with those boots once. You don’t remember.
“I’m here to get you out,” the voice speaks again and you can only listen to the tone of voice, the way it sends a shockwave through your body and lessens the violent trembles. “Look up for me.”
You ignore him and focus on your breathing.
“Is she coming?” That first voice. Impatient. Panting.
The male before you turns to the centre of the floor and gives a frustrated sigh, “She’s pretty out of it.”
Before waiting for the other man to respond, he turns back to you and studies you. Even though you don’t see him, his stare burns right through the flimsy clothes they put on you. He lets out a soft sigh and flips out a knife from the holster at his waist, still kneeling before you. You stiffen, preparing yourself for the sting at your throat as they finally decide to get rid of you, but he tries his best not to touch any bare skin as he saws through the materials binding you together.
The relief of pressure from your skin make you feel so uneasy, you nearly throw up, but a gentle hand covers your arm and you finally look up. Warm, dark blue eyes connect with yours. Below heavy brows and above the faintest cluster of freckles. His mouth is soft and pillowy and his bone structure is otherworldly symmetrical.
“It’s okay,” he tells you gently and offers you a smile that you can tell doesn’t come to him naturally. “Can you walk?”
He pulls you to a stand with a firm, but comfortable grip and you instantly stumble on your feet at the weight suddenly put on them. One arm flies around your waist and hoists you into his side as he catches your fall.
“Okay, okay,” he grunts with a gentle laugh. “I got you. Let’s get the fuck out of here, alright?”
Your throat feels like sandpaper as you hobble along with the wall of a male dragging you along, “Who are you?”
He spares you a brief glance and smiles once more, following ‘Steve’ out of the building and onto an air craft that is way too loud. “Bucky. We’re here to help you. Or I suppose you’re here to help us, little rebel.”
…
Steve gives Bucky a knowing glare, only breaking it by daring a glance at your bedroom door which you have been effectively hiding behind for weeks now. “You know I can’t go in there, Bucky.”
“You know I won’t let you,” Bucky answers drily with a shrug. As opposed to his best friend, Bucky hasn’t stopped staring at your door.
“You’re not even hiding your possessiveness when it comes to her,” Steve breathes through a laugh. That makes Bucky finally look at his friend.
“I’m not possessive,” he says matter-of-factly. He’s not even offended, just practical. “I’m protective. The last thing she needs is all of the nosy people in this tower swirling around her when she doesn’t trust a single soul.”
“Has she started to trust you?”
Bucky has to keep from wincing at Steve’s question, and he clears his throat. “Sure,” he lies.
If Steve caught the lie, he didn’t let on. It was as much of a dismissal as he was going to get. After watching his best friend walk off to do captain things, Bucky braces himself to step into your room. He has no hope that his interaction with you will be any different than the previous ones.
“Another day of convincing me to be your weapon?” you nearly snarl when he walks into your room.
If Bucky is entirely honest, he thought you would have turned into this damaged girl that would morph into a wild animal as you worked through what had been done to you. He didn’t really expect this perseverance and defiance from the woman he saved from that prison. But he supposes he should have seen that question coming. It wasn’t his best work; starting that day he saved you with all of the things you could be doing for them. Why they had saved you. Simply for their own gain. Or that is how you understood it, at least…
He has never been good with words. That has always been Steve’s thing. Bucky was reliable physically and he paid attention. He never had to use many words to make his point. Yet you keep asking these questions – rhetorical, he thinks – and you keep giving him this penetrating stare until he answers. Which is a sure way to make him fuck up, because how do people do that? Bring sensible thoughts into words and make it make sense?
Especially when the woman asking said questions is so damned… pretty.
“It’s time for you to get out of this room,” he tells you plainly. It seems the tactic of ignoring your questions is effective. It only took him six days to figure that one out.
He strides over to cross the room, not sparing you another glance in your chair in the corner, and rips open the curtains. The cat-like hiss coming from you has Bucky nearly biting back a smile. He turns and watches you stand from your chair, stalking over to him with your chin high and a scowl on your face. He raises an eyebrow with amused intrigue.
“And what, exactly, will I be doing outside of my room?” you ask.
He dips down slightly, but you keep the proximity. “Whatever you want. I don’t care.”
“If you don’t care, why hunt me out of my room?”
He shrugs, “Captain’s orders.” He isn’t entirely lying.
“Why isn’t the captain telling me himself?”
Bucky smirks and leans even closer, making you feel his minty breath fan over your face. “Because I’m the only one who isn’t scared of you.”
You snort at that and roll your eyes before breaking away from him. “I’ll get dressed.”
Bucky tries his hardest not to look too stunned as you retreat into the bathroom. A deep sigh leaves his lips as he paces through your room in wait for you to get ready. It takes a whole lot of effort to muster a smirk when it comes to his interactions with you.
“F.R.I.D.A.Y.?” he asks quietly.
Just as quietly, the house responds, “Yes, Sergeant Barnes?”
“Has she asked for anything from you? To contact friends or family, or other information?”
“No, she hasn’t.”
“Does she have anyone left?” he tries, chewing his lip as he dreads the answer.
“Not that we’re aware. Mr. Stark had me run a background check, but she seems alone. No sign of anyone missing or deceased. No sign of a network at all.”
Bucky doesn’t know why that feels worse in his chest and he swallows. “Alright, thank you.”
A few moments later, you step out of the shower and find Bucky lounging in the chair he found you in, leafing through one of your books. Just as you’re about to check whether he has gotten his hands on one of your smuttier books, your eyes snag on the clothes laid out for you on the bed.
You pause long enough to make Bucky look up from the book. “Did you… Did you seriously pick out this underwear for me?”
Bucky eyes the lace panties dangling from your fingers and shrugs with a smirk. A smirk had never looked so enticing, but you sharpen your stare on him. “Do you prefer the grey, cotton ones in the back of the closet?”
You grit your teeth and scowl at him again, before morphing your mouth into a vindictive smile. “Why? Don’t you?”
His eyes dance at that. “Wouldn’t make a difference to me.”
And it’s the way he said it, with so much casual amusement and… promise. Heat rises to your face and you duck your head down. Snatching the clothes from the bed, you retreat back into the bathroom to get dressed.
…
The rest of your conversations had been purely functional as Bucky lead you down into the building where Steve was waiting. Bucky rolled his eyes at his friend’s horrible attempt at hiding his surprise. Steve hadn’t seen you since the day they came to save you, he must have never expected Bucky to be successful in his retrieval.
Bucky also hadn’t missed the meaningful look Steve then gave him that indicated he tucked away some valuable information. The information being that if they ever needed to get you to do something, Bucky is the way to get you to do it. Why? Steve seemed to have his theories and Bucky didn’t like it one bit.
However, for now he doesn’t care. Instead, he sticks by you after you reluctantly agreed to join Steve on a walk.
Strolling down the path through the surrounding woods, Bucky catches himself bracing for a fight every time Steve gets a little too close to you. He doesn’t like it. The last time he was this sensitive to proximity, he had just ran from Hydra. He’s seen other traumatised people before, but this feels different. And instead of listening to your and Steve’s conversation, he tries to figure out what it is. He supposes it’s because you have no survival instinct. In the few videos he’s seen of your rebellion and the encounters he has had with you the past weeks, you see danger or conflict and run straight toward it. Nothing scared or cautious about you. It sets his nerves on edge.
Bucky is well aware of what Steve is telling you and he has to refrain from rolling his eyes at the careful way Steve tries to coax you into their plan, when earlier that week they had not been nearly as careful as they calculated how to get you involved. But even Bucky had to admit that they needed you – specifically, everyone who would follow you into the grave. When Stark had shown him the videos, he was perplexed as to how you got such a huge following when what you fought for was so terribly dangerous. But one look at those sharp eyes and one deep command from you, and Bucky had seen it. That unwavering will and that brilliant brain that was always calculating. Steve could learn a few tricks from you on being a strong leader. And considering Bucky wildly admires his old friend, that is saying something.
They need you. Bucky knows it, too. They need not just someone with great leadership skills and a loyal following, but someone that does it out of empathy for the people mistreated by the system. Because that is who they’re going to be fighting – the system.
Again.
…
“You haven’t said anything about what Steve told you,” Bucky says on your walk back to your room. The offer to escort you back to your room hadn’t been entirely selfless.
“I need to think about it,” you murmur, deep in thought.
Bucky suppresses his sigh of sympathy. They are asking you to join a cause you were so passionate about, and that after failing so miserably last time. He can barely imagine the things you must have witnessed and endured with your last upraise. How you had gotten so influential that the government decided to treat you like you were a super-human and punished you accordingly. You had been put in the same prison as Wanda. Wanda. That is how powerful you were.
“It can’t be easy to revisit everything after all that’s happened,” he resigns and you blink from your thoughts to raise your eyes to his face. You study him and it takes all of Bucky’s might not to shift under your assessing gaze.
Then you speak up, “I’ve always done the right thing. Steve knows I can’t walk away from it…”
Bucky smiles at that. “Just like him.”
Your eyes narrow at that comment, but Bucky finds no venom in the look. You continue, “Sacrificing my life for the cause was never an issue. But to lead others into that same fate again?” The guilt had eaten you alive. All those people that had gotten arrested, split up from loved ones, hurt– worse…
Bucky interrupts your thoughts before they get a hold on you by clearing his throat. “Tonight, we have dinner with everyone. You’re welcome to join if you’d like.” Your heavy stare on him makes him quickly add, “Don’t give me that look. There will be no talk of overthrowing the government. Just dress fancy.”
The snort of a laugh that comes from you feels lighter to Bucky than he’d like to admit. And to ease the tension, he forces another smirk to his face. You narrow your eyes again warily, “What.”
He shrugs, turning to leave you alone at your door. Then he winks. “Let me know if you need me to pick out some underwear for you.” And then he’s gone.
Bucky hangs onto that cockiness all the way until dinner, where the entire group has showed up. Even Thor said he’d show up for a drink. Barton flew in from his family home to join the group as well. He remembers a time when he’d felt more than uncomfortable around this group of people. But so much has changed. They all saw him as a great asset to the team and even relied on him more and more to supervise the missions. He’s at home with them now. Heart swelling with affection, he listens to his friends – his family – laugh in the kitchen while they pour the drinks.
And then all of their faces turn into one direction, some of them pulling taut, few of them giving warm, comforting smiles. Bucky follows their gaze and it is like someone punched him in the gut, air whooshing out of his body. He doesn’t really know why – other than the obvious fact that you look ravishing of course. But he looks at you and clears his throat to welcome you to the group.
Natasha beats him to it though and it has Bucky’s hackles rising. She shoots him a knowing smile and then he backs off. His pride wounded like a cat booped on the nose. Natasha is good at it, charming people until they feel comfortable. Or take their pants off. But there’s an easy smile on your face – one Bucky knows is at least slightly forced – and you blend in with the crowd easily.
Suddenly, Sam’s at his side. “I know what you’re thinking,” he grumbles with his eyes on you and Natasha, followed by a swig of his beer bottle. “Those two together can only mean trouble.”
Bucky can only grunt in agreement.
…
“What on Earth are you talking about?” Natasha drawls with a guilty smile.
Barton shakes his head. “The poor schmuck didn’t stand a chance. There is no way you could have taken him if you hadn’t slept with him the night before.”
Natasha shrugs. “Look, a girl has her needs. He met them and the next day he met his fate.”
“Really, Nat?” Steve nearly cringes and Bucky reins in his laugh. “The guy’s moral compass was straight from hell and you decided to sleep with him?”
Natasha barely manages to open her mouth before you decide to pitch in, raising a glass to her. “I get it. Terrible morals do add a little spice in the bedroom.”
Nat clinks her glass with yours and mutters a ‘she gets it’, but Bucky’s eyes are searing through your skin. He doesn’t know why he’s surprised at such outrageous claims coming out of your mouth. There is nothing innocent about you. Good, yes. Innocent? No. Yet perhaps it isn’t ‘surprise’ that is warming his body from the inside out.
Conversation flows easily between the Avengers and the food Tony had made easily beats the Brooklyn comfort food Bucky usually seeks out. Cheeks turn rosy from the drinks, voices get louder, lights get dimmer. Bucky has to really look to be sure what he’s seeing. You, relaxed and happy. Such a stark contrast to the woman he found in the prison. No wonder you’re so good with people. People make you good.
He can barely manage his smirk however, when he notices the strain in your body to keep from looking at him. Why you are so adamant to avoid him, he can’t really tell. But this is now your weak spot, so he cannot help but tuck the info away for later.
The night carries on and everyone switches places, catching up on endless memories and adventures and being surprisingly considerate to include you in most conversations. Bucky ends up at the head of the table, you on the seat closest to him, both listening to Sam. You listen closely and Bucky can only assume you have some relief from being actively distracted from him. And being the arrogant bastard he knows he can be, he ‘accidentally’ brushes a knuckle over the back of your hand that’s resting on the table. He watches you stiffen and swallow, but like a true rebel, you show no other sign that it affected you.
A few more stunts like that had Bucky pressing his knee to your thigh under the table and it takes everything not to pull away from it. So you gaslight yourself to let the touch ground you. To absorb his warmth and relax even more into the touch. And if you guess it correctly, the way you respond to Bucky’s touch is not what he expected… So you find yourself having the upper hand again.
And if you’re going to join these people in their cause, what’s a little game with your menace of a saviour?
#oh my fucking god#im doing it#im posting a slow burn#with buckys pov for crying out loud#i am terribly sorry for being gone for so goddamn long im a busy woman#BUT quality over quantity amirite?#enjoy my lovelies and please let me know what you think#feedback does genuinely make me post quicker (i cant help it)#rebellion series#bucky barnes smut#bucky barnes x reader#writing#bucky barnes#bucky barnes x you#bucky barnes oneshot#series
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i need them to explode btw
#GODDDDDDDDDDDDDDD.#sorry. long post is long i didnt want to group these#despicable me#dm4#gruxime#guys. i know ur out there#OHHHHHH theyre so silly. oh my god#i rlly rlly love the idea of gru staying in contact w maxime after 4. they r friendssssssss#stopppp the one where maxime slowly reaches for the wig again is so funny#I FEEL FUCKING SICKKKKKKKKK.#THE MICCCCCCCC. PLEASE#also i have to say this. idk why i thought the other day maxime ws wearing purple here. its so obviously blue#ill blame the older cam copy idgaf#ok now ive done this i can start working on my amv. TSKKKKKKK#oh actually also getting these clips i noticed maxime grew his hair out a bit hereeeee. SO CYUTE#sorry to any gif snobs out there bttw im so lazy. i will never ever do that photoshop bullshit sorry.#i cld have put a nice pinkish overlay on these like i normally do but i forgor. and the colours r nice anyways BEAUTIFUL ILLUMINATION
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he’s literally so beautiful and handsome
#HOW MANY TIMES DO I HAVE TO SAY THAT IM SO FUCKING WEAK EVERY TIME BEOMGYU AND GUITAR LIKE LITERALLY MY HEART MELTS#I LOVE EVERY TIME HE PERFORMS W GUITAR I THINK THIS ONE IS MY FAVE SO FAR#his outfit as well omfg he looks so fucking good they styled him well g#the guitar is so pretty as well and I love the strap the bird design on the fretboard is so cool#I heard there’s only 200 of them as well I don’t even play guitar but I want to buy it just bc it’s so beautiful#BEOMGYU RAPPING !!! OH MY GOD 😭😭😭#HE DID SO WELL#HIS SINGING AS WELL#and his guitar parts were really good in this one like he’s improved sm I’m so proud of him 😭#like he’d never performed w guitar on stage before until recently and doing lots of lives and practicing a lot more#like I remember him saying he got a few guitar lessons for wonder and him saying he was shocked bc he realised he’s not that good at guitar#and is starting to learn the basics again and practicing more consistently#and he really has improved you can hear it ! I was actually shocked like it sounded so good#beomgyu<3!#also the when he posted on Instagram literally squealed THEYRE SO FUCKING PRETTY#honestly one of my favourite pictures of him#what can I say I love pretty sunsets and pretty boys#yo why are the tags so long 😭😭 wtf#I’m sorry I can talk about beomgyu for days
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it is beyond infuriating how anne rice seems to insist on marius being a positive force in anyone's life ever. like she can't fully commit to exploring the fact he groomed armand and has repeatedly taken away his consent for what marius thinks is best (take the end of TVA as an example) and just kind of flatly puts it in the narrative. there's not really much interest in how these horrific events make marius come across as the worst because EVERYONE loves him. for gods sake, lestat learns from armand exactly what marius did to him in TVL and then proceeds to go find marius and be super friendly to him in the same fucking book. even armand and pandora, two of the people who have MORE than enough right to hate him, do not. it doesnt feel like shes trying to explore the toxicity of the abusive dynamic he traps them in, it just is there. and like yeah ofc the toxic vampire romance series but i think that this should be handled with more care. and it is not ever really framed in a way that she is interested in exploring how marius should easily be one of the most horrific characters in this series because it kind of feels like sa/rape/grooming/other things of that sort are just put there to further plot and not to really get the respect that they deserve in a medium.
#twist rambles#vc posting#grooming mention#for blocklist sorry im on my im really mad about this fucking series soapbox again#to be fucking honest she treats slavery similar. like its just THERE and the characters doing it dont really feel bad about it (much like m#rius doesnt seem to.. feel much if any remorse for arm.and) and it is just like... ok heres another bad thing with no examination. this isn#a super coherent post but i went a bit forward to see how b&g was handling the arm.and stuff and oh my god. oh im so mad. like i just... i#wish so badly that arma.nds abuse was taken seriously other than haha its sooo quirky that mari.us is in a position of power over him and#provides housing money sex comfort etc for him and is abusing him but hes sooo happy with himmmm. like he fucking sold him into sex slavery#and we are supposed to root for him#ask to tag#sorry this is just. its a very triggering part of the books but its something that i kind of keep returning to to mull over because it is#handled really badly. like i think she was trying to go for a lo.lita vibe (iirc she did actually mention nabok.ov as an inspiration) but#didnt really care enough to examine WHY that is an interesting take on the subject matter. not even to get into pan.doras stuff bc its just#really bad but at least he waited until she was an adult i suppose. like i will give anne one thing that she has characters and (poorly han#led) writing that makes you really think and analyze. which i think is where i enjoy media that is like... this kind of sucks at points but#u can tell the authors viewpoints soo transparently. and u can examine it thru this. like i think thats why i find the gr.ell run of GA int#resting too bc u can telll that man is a libertarian and doesnt respect women. and then claims to do so. its interesting to me. anyways#did u guys know she defended bill clin.ton when the monica stuff came out and victim blamed her. just a funny coincidence.#sorry for the really long tag rant but i am sooo fed up with how she treats this topic forever and ever. bc its been this way forever.#anyways back to reading had to get that out. lmk if u need me to tag this bc its a lot of tws :)
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the moment people stop being comically against courtney is the day i stop making fun of them for being weird and wrong. stop being weird about a fictional character in ways that are hilariously stupid and ill stop calling you hilariously stupid
#people see my posts and vauge post about it saying UM WELL I DONT HATE COURTNEY SO WHY DID YOU SAY THAT#im not fucking talking about you oh my gOD IM SO TIRED OF SEEING IT. sorry i try to be normal but why have discussions around her regressed#like its gotten so much worse WHYYY OH MY GODDD. “omfg courtney fans always jump to courtney haters being misogynists”#no i jump to you being a fucking weirdo for caring so much which makes me raise my eyebrows#i literally enjoy other people having different opinions about characters i like and dislike bc everyone echoing me would be so boring#but people never like her for the valid reasons there are to dislike her and jump on her in crazy fucking ways. BEEE NORMALLL BE FUCKING N#ps talks#jesus fuck i try not to say shit like this over and over and over again because; again; i dont like seeing my own opinions everywhere#i dont want people to see my opinions and repeat it every 5 seconds even though i dont think i have that much influence#its just when i see people posting about my posts saying that im weird for defending a character so hard it drives me nuts bc#it feels like people lost the damn plot so hard. you have to reach so far to think i fucking care if people dislike courtney BECAUSE I DONT#IVE SAOID THIS 5 BILLION TIMES I ENJOY SEEING CHARACTERS IN DIFFERENT LIGHT. AS LONG AS YOUR OPINION ISNT FUCKING WEIRD#sorry im getting so annoyed i need to go to sleep i havent eaten anything in like 20 hours
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🦴
#blackened bones au just got so wild y'all#mr 'whats a king to a god whats a god to a nonbeliever' jaehaerys targaryen over there who is not king btw#and is instead like a 12 year old hand of the king (sorry tywin) because his oldest brother has a huge case of 'weird flex but okay'#and his extra early elopement and subsequent earlt creation of the doctrine for Reasons#made aegon go you have been promoted u are now one of my elite employees!! took him from cupbearer to hand. as one does#but anyway aegon mr black maegor black magic baby electric boogaloo was unable to produce more than one pregnancy in his wife lol#because the black magic is FUCKED for REASONS (maegor skewed it gay. also for reasons. namely fucking aenys reasons)#and now he has no (male) heir and HE wants to make aerea his heir bc aegon is the chad of this family. also visenya got to him young#rhaena the lesbian is on board for obvious reasons but alyssa is decidedly Not & either is the council bc like. the targs have been wilding#in one decade they balerioned the starry sept and vhagared the sept of remembrance killing like. most of the high ranking sevenists lmao.#lol even. plus jae and aly also eloped cause ofc they did the council was trying to marry her to a hightower. oh and also the doctrine#been a bit of a decade and all that happened in just 9 years. also viserys and lysarra (oc first maegor/aenys daughter) got married#which was the first post doctrine marriage. they're the two crazies. she has a mini balerion. went wonderfully as im sure you can imagine#anyway the targs need to CHILL. give the realm a breather. NOT CHANGE THOUSANDS OF YEARS OF INHERITANCE PRECEDENT.#aegon the chad is not helping them do that. so alyssa uses her big brain. & she's like well aegon is a black magic baby (thnx maegor)#and he's king. so why not get him a Surrogate and make him an heir. for Reasons it can't be any of his fellow maegor black magic babies#(black magic babies can't have kids with each other bc they're barely fertile on their own lol) and his remaining options are aly & vaella#both of whom are out bc they're a) 14 and 11 respectively and also b) married and a future nun. shit happens.#viserys is a no cuz lysarra is Crazy and aegon knows it and respects it. that leaves jaehaerys 😁 the good dutiful fourth son 😁#the og machiavellian propaganda maker 😁 who will do Anything to get what he wants 😁 esp for the good of his house and the Realm 😁#long story short jaehaerys the nonbeliever to hardcore sevenist loser gets valyrian magic gender fuckery & gives birth to the heir <3#a delight to negotiate with alysanne as im sure you understand. truly didn't almost end the marriage he rewrote the law and religion for#shit happens <3 long live the third prince of dragonstone aerys targaryen who is the second shipname baby future king#(the first was aenys. aegon = ae rhaenys = nys. now aegon the uncrowned that WAS crowned named his heir aegon = ae and jaehaerys = rys)#(bc naming his first daughter after aerea and his second after rhaena wasn't enough evidently. he is a crazy person)#(he names the twin [they're twins it is the worst year of jaehaerys's LIFE think renesmee & bella] alystair. for alysanne.)#(he is a crazy person x2.)#and that's on today's episode of:#blackened bones au
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tohruest adachiest manager's choice experience as compiled by the tumblr branch moel gas station 2023
helloooo my dearest okyakusan my most wonderful customers whether you have a membership card or just passing by. Here is the manager's choice of how to have the most tohru adachi experience ever 📣📣📣
this post will have a breakdown of the whole diagram with highlights, and my own opinions of each medium stated. Otherwise, here's a summary as a list!!
YES!!
Persona 4 (PS2 2008)
Standalone Drama CD Vol. 3 (scattered cameos)
Manga Adaptation (Sogabe)
adachi jumpscare table
Vol. 10; Chapter 54
Vol. 12
Arena Ultimax; Episode Adachi
Arena Ultimax Manga Adaptation (Rokuro Saito special mention!??)
this is a bit cool too
The Golden Animation
Blu-ray/DVD Vol. 2; Bonus Drama CD: A Sense of Gratitude
Blu-ray/DVD Vol. 4; Bonus Drama CD: Boo ~ I bear a grudge on you ~
The Animation
Standalone Drama CD Vol. 2: You'll understand when you get older
The Golden (PS VITA 2013) (Social Link, new events, etc.)
um
The Golden Animation
Episode 6: See? I told you Yu.
Episode 7: It’s cliché, so what?
Unaired Bonus Episode “Another End Episode”: Thank you Mr. Accomplice
other opinions
I’ll be linking all available online resources for everything I’ve stated!! If a link is broken or the media is inaccessible, hit me up!! I have my own personal archive.
YES!! segment !! wahoo !!!!! this is where i constantly stuff my nose in whenever i want a good reference on adachis character. AND THEY'RE ALL PERFECT TO ME!! <- about the media
Persona 4 (PS2 2008)
Back to basics everybody!!! Let’s remember who this goofball is from the start. Forget he has a social link and see him be the bumbling fool for plot exposition and the real murderer !!!! Just like how I tell you not to reference the attendant during 3/20, we can put Shadow Adachi’s mannerisms and his influence under literal god aside and try and focus on what that means as symbolism and extra information on Adachi himself!!
Standalone Drama CD Vol. 3
THIS IS A FUN ONE he has scattered cameos throughout the drama and was essentially being dragged around by Dojima.
Basic premise of this volume that it’s sports festival season!! Yasogami’s at it and the IT are participating, as well as Nanako—although she worries that her dad won’t even come to see her and that she wouldn’t even be able to do the family three-legged race.
Adachi’s appearances here are so stupid, he says he was an “elite” then flops trying to help high-schoolers with homework because Naoto’s there. He does his usual begging and whining with Dojima etc etc he also drove Dojima to compete with Nanako after saying the man finished all his reports as fast as possible.
I like this one because it reinforces who Adachi is based mostly from the main game. With the context that fans listening are aware he’s the culprit (or not), they do sprinkle in his “emptiness” (<- no i'm exaggerating it sorry) and bring it to the front of the picture a bit.
Translated Transcript: https://docs.google.com/spreadsheets/d/14uOTyzic9Ij9DjN4ZRNBLFTcGe0UF-PvX4qMnqcs2Fk/edit#gid=283104639
Available video link: https://youtu.be/p3yDNbczEqg?t=228 (timestamped to 3:49)
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Manga Adaptation (Sogabe)
SOUJI SETA TRUTHER COMING IN STRONG also i just adore Sogabe’s adaptation on the game as a whole. While I am Marie lover#1, this manga did begin in 2008, and I like to think it’s the hypothetical that Marie really was expunged completely OKAY WHERE WAS I
As mentioned, this whole adaptation focuses on the game before Golden was ever a thing. No scooters, no extra events, no nothing. Although, Sogabe did write in a bit of Adachi’s Social Link in a context best suited for Souji.
I like Sogabe's take on Adachi in the manner of how he draws him and writes him as a character. It's not as whimsical or lazy like the anime, and the way he took the downhill spiral of the Hospital arc, from November to December, just actually felt like my emotions were ready in the right places. Surprisingly, in every adaptation, I was really enamored to see how Adachi acted differently in each one.
In the manga, he didn't seem as slack jawed as he did in the game at least. He looked like he was trying so hard to act concerned when he he actually feels guilty for everything going down !!! OR MAYBE NOT !!!!!!!
compared to the game, you can really how much he exudes of being so. plastic. ung kaplastikan. and you're mad not because you're stuck with ps2 limitations of three polygons of an arm waving around, but you're mad that he reeks of faking concern. But also unlike the game, you don't understand what's going on anymore because of the things that have transpired in relation to Adachi's character. Which is Sogabe's adaptation of his Social Link with Souji through having dinner with each other.
and Souji doesn’t know him! They share things with one another that one dinner but otherwise, Adachi’s never rambled on about himself as much as he does in a normal Social Link run. There is a different sort of motive with Souji and he wants to some things wrap things up while everything else is falling apart around him. If there’s a chance to help someone, even if he’s only talked thoroughly once or twice and that the other party’s opened up a single time to him, he’s the boy who wants to get through to people either way. What if Souji’s a bit selfish himself and wants to be in control of things when everything in his life and vision are literally blurring as he breathes? (takes place in november when nanako's hospitalized btw)
I love the lack of intimacy between the two, contrary to what majority of the fan base wants or even BELIEVES. Souji is a kid with a year in Inaba, of course he does a million other things with his time than hang out with an adult that’s some kind of darker version of himself and a representation of a possible bleaker future considering how similar they are.
As for the specific chapters, I think it’s fulfilling to go through the whole manga from the start. Like, forget everything you know about P4 for a second and experience it as fresh as possible. Then you get to Chapter 54 to see Adachi’s condensed Social Link and get to Volume 12 to see things come together. Sure, I start getting a bit iffy with Volume 13 but I enjoy the parallels between the two, genuinely.
i have more stuff locked and loaded but uhmmm yeah 👍
Available manga link: https://manhuascan.me/manga/persona-4-official
VISUALIVE (stageplay)
you will never see adachi ever act like a cunt like this ever again. he only does it once because hes gay.
i have made a million essays about this this is the foundation of this gas station itself
Available video links to the only things i’ve subbed ever because they’re the most important ones to this fruit’s development:
https://youtu.be/mWRB1dIgFNE
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https://youtu.be/QRps3M9uXiw
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or you can watch the whole thing because Masami Itou’s portrayal of him is just delightful: https://youtu.be/7oTpjmeD-mk
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Arena Ultimax; Episode Adachi
hahaha. haha. laughs weakly. haha.
I would kindly ask everybody to do this in Japanese dub but otherwise ehmmm yeah ! Episode Adachy. I do enjoy how they try to elaborate how his personalities are coalescing into a single face as he doesnt have to fake around people anymore. Like the fact that his lame humor is still present and he’ll do stupid voices, which makes you wonder if he was always like this or that it’s something he adopted while acting out the last facade he’s done for over a year—or more.
HE IS SO FUCKING OPINIONATED AND THINKS HES SO COOL he has SO MUCH PRIDE but also he doesnt at the same time. you think hes a soldier surviving in the idgaf war but hes still dying in the mines he planted and crossfire for multiple reasons. hes simultaneously a teenage girl and a man in his late twenties.
Adachi is totally giving a fuck, not just in a white girl bully “I’m better than everyone” kind of way but like he’s totally giving a fuck about a lot of things. “Oh I gotta stop whatever this god has going down for this city in bumfuck nowhere because the case is going to go around in circles and i’ll never serve jail time in peace” how many times has he turned corners in an alleyway maze just by saying this.
hes literally trembling in his shoes with everything happening in that hour but hes just so good at bottling up emotions from others and HIMSELF. Theres only so much he’ll admit in his own monologue—in his own thoughts. That hes aware of things but he’ll never say it out loud even in his own head i’ll tear him apart with my bare hands <- i am just genuinely annoyed he can do this and not me but i should be grateful that i can express myself than be an emotionally repressed asshole
He finds kids who are mirrors where he sees himself in. One, a goody two-shoes who has it all, the other an actual brat with a fucked up life from loneliness, isolation, and abuse (a million other things). And he’s not annoyed only because he finds similarities between him and them, but the fact that they’re children and they have at least a decade more than his ass which he spent sulking about with.
He’s mad at Bancho because he has his way from the kindness and generosity of his time he’s spent with others, something Adachi didn’t do; in which he could use his situation with his family and education as an excuse, but he never brings that up because as much as he likes seeing others eat shit and he has his way, Adachi also considers himself a fuckup. can you see this irony. So many chances to get out there and socialize, but he stuck his nose in his studies thinking a good future’s already laid out for him—BUT THE BUBBLE POPPED which is what fucking happens when youre in Japanese economic depression after the bubble economy. and you dont bother to leave your comfort zone either EVEN WHEN YOU DONT NECESSARILY like the things youre doing because it’s the only damn thing you’re used to !!!!
He’s sick of Sho because he’s an oversized 10 year old who’s doing the exact same thing Adachi’s done in the past and Adachi is sick of that. he hates himself. and he’ll hate a kid for acting the same way. He’ll project so much he’ll fix another person’s mistakes not out of pure goodness of his heart, but because he doesnt like himself as a person no matter how much he tries to deflect these thoughts in his own head.
Adachi’ll scoff and nitpick Narukami because he doesn’t want to admit this better version of him is better. That he’s not this other guy, but rather, he’s just himself. He complains and whines about Dojima and even says he “hates him,” but is everyone not aware he’s the second biggest tsundere in this series next to Marie at this point. they are COMPETING for that number one title.
no matter how many times he tries to sever connections for the sake of the other party, those bonds are developed enough for the other party to WANT to tie it back together. he doesnt know how to build bridges, but he doesnt know how to properly burn them either. hes sloppy at everything he does. he is gay.
okay sorry about that im sososo dizzy honestly. where was i. i talked about his issue with his Persona before and how it isnt his Persona a million times on this blog sorry i really everything's spinning right now 'and you're still writing an adachi essay?' hushup
Japanese Bubble Economy: https://www.britannica.com/topic/bubble-economy
Available Video Link: https://youtu.be/0TkRLCGqT3g
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Arena Ultimax Manga Adaptation (Rokuro Saito)
this is a bit funny. i read it mostly for Sho like. while i do adore it as very beautiful adaptation. when it comes to adachi uhh. hmm. looks around. the rokuro saito effect. he did mementos mission too if you're wondering and what I mean by this.
I mean he did reinforce Adachi getting proper police training and essentially being above average to the top of his classes (krav maga, shooting accuracy, detectivisms, etc.). His humor and mannerisms are also delightful i think personally with the way they're illustrated and essentially visualized. Rokusai has his quirk for drawing everybody really pretty which he does really well for Persona characters, but it also caught me really off guard when he works on adachi like okay! sho breaking his ribs can fix everything itsok.
Available manga link: https://m.manganelo.com/manga-cn116859
OH now this is the section where im a bit iffy with the characterization here but i still like to reference it sometimes
The Golden Animation
Blu-ray/DVD Vol. 2; Bonus Drama CD: A Sense of Gratitude
Adachi doesnt have a big part here he’s literally there to help with the Dojima garden and Narukami plants cabbages for him.
Available Video Link: https://youtu.be/1SNKljdyUcY?t=640 (timestamped to 10:40)
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Blu-ray/DVD Vol. 4; Bonus Drama CD: Boo ~ I bear a grudge on you ~
THIS. this, goodness gracious it was so silly. Adachi’s here for a few segments with Dojima in the pub. Detective yaoi if thats what you’re into I guess. He also sounds a bit cheeky here in speaking tone and the scheme he’s pulling to call Naoto to do their job while Dojima’s knocked out on duty.
Available Video Link: https://youtu.be/PasKTZtKx_c?t=720 (timestamped at 12:00)
youtube
The Animation
i dont have much to say about the actual anime i dont really watch it, but i respect the Narukami truthers out there. It’s just not for me, nor do I reference it for Adachi at all. why does he look like this
i dont have that much judgement to say if it's good enough to use as reference for Adachi besides it visualizing how much of a goofball he is, I guess I could mention that. I have issues of it depicting lore but otherwise i dont think it's that much different than what the base game pulls besides it different pacing to better fit the animation medium.
Standalone Drama CD Vol. 2: You'll understand when you get older
Not particularly partial with this one because the anime gave Narukami a face, like he’s his own character here. Dojima makes Adachi go to Okina and deliver something because his clown ass forgot to hand it over to the other prefect police who visited within the day. Narukami’s off to go help Ebi stand in line for a makeup promo and Dojima says they can go together. There’s a subplot with the IT where they think Narukami’s being arrested lol so they go follow him throughout the rest of the drama.
Adachi just hangs out with the silly billy that is his boss’ nephew who has so much kindness and generosity that it could get the kid killed one day.
Available Video Playlist Link: https://youtube.com/playlist?list=PL2Wysh6PBhe_jyqxxIcyt_XrW6GcKHRn0
The Golden (PS VITA 2013)
I scratch my head and wonder what they were going for with Adachi’s Social Link besides the fanservice. I mean thats what they did with akc in royal i guess. <- has my own opinions about this but im closing my mouth.
It feels a bit too… intimate for me? What’s the deal with WANTING to invite him for dinner… without Dojima around either. Like they’re a two in one package for me, you can’t see one without the other most of the time. Like Adachi’s slacking off work while Dojima’s slaving away by himself? I’ve always believed they get off at the same time or something because of the subordinate status.
I did enjoy the Junes segments though, it kind of felt like it was a good placement—if you move things around a bit. Him hiding behind your back while you’re doing groceries so it looks like he’s busy was a bit funny, and him chatting you up while you’re supposed to be busy yourself is also silly if you consider that Bancho himself wants to bail and was just caught into his chismosa and whining. He has enough of a degree of association with you as you’re putting your nose into the murder case and that you’re his boss’ nephew, so that’s kind of why you’re the only few people he can talk to.
(pauses yes or yes ) i also ate ice cream where was I going with this
dont make me talk about the accomplice ending that thing’s pretty corny to me but also unnerving i dont want to think about it alot.
With the way things have gone for Adachi’s new characterization with the added Social Link and the new events for Golden, it personally made me think twice about it all, especially when his TV studio and Shadow self ended up the same. There’s a lot to go about this? (<- deranged) and I will admit that I myself got sucked into the idea that he’s an antagonist and couldn’t truly experience everything right at that point. whoopsie. Then again, looking at it at this point in time after a few years makes me realize yeah maybe this does make a bit of sense! The nature of the fog has changed, which can explain the drastic change in character between Namatame and Adachi. which is an essay for another day I really feel a bit out of it.
The “um” segment. Stuff I dont really like to reference nor put in the pot that makes adachi soup because im really iffy with it and how the writing was taken liberally for the sake of the audience rather than the reinforcement of source material itself.
The Golden Animation
The Adachi centric episodes 6, 7, and the accomplice ending bonus episode lol, as the whole Golden anime was really for Marie and other new Golden add-ons like Okina and scooters and ski trip and etc.
how do I put this. im really opinionated on this segment it’s okay if you dont take my word for it. I dont like the production quality. The animation is honestly really bad and the artstyle itsnt tasteful with how it’s executed. There’s enough frames of Marie that people looking over my shoulder while I watch would call her Adachi. It really is a boatload of a cashgrab and fanservice that kind of adds new insightful things to the lore but honestly? I don;t trust it. Like the writers forgot what they were writing about and started writing fanfiction of what they originally made.
It did give some insight with Adachi, but I hate how they just made Narukami the way he is for this adaptation. Like the boy does have all the time in world and hes not an overworked high-schooler with so many commitments now he can… make a man dinner and deliver it to him…? I would definitely say “> Adachi doesn't seem to lead a nutritionally balanced life...” and leave it at that, i am not making him dinner i dont have time for that. can someone get this guy a girlfriend please. Don’t get me started how they treated his character development and lore surrounding him overall im sick of it. At least Sogabe made it all look pretty.
anyway here’s the part where i can add my closing thoughts as someone who fills a niche solely because they think and enjoy things so differently than the present majority. I don’t think im mature enough to enjoy things peacefully in a community full of different people but also because im losing the idgaf war myself. I’m glad I can enjoy a media in general and I’m so happy when people can enjoy it with me. (had to stop the cat from clawing on the vacuum he likes the texture apparently) where was I
hold my hand as i go through a hundred coming of age arcs in my life and that one day i wont be as embarrassed as i am now to admit i like tohru adachi as a character and talk about him with a restraint so childish because I dislike how a majority depict him. he’s part of my journey as i learn things about myself as much as mimi but in a more human way because. hes human. or something. one day i can forget his reputation in the community and create all the things i make with pure love that is not fueled by spite to be right and correct. I already know i am right and correct because everyone can enjoy things their own way and find things that they like in one thing that are different from things others like. for now, i will still treat him like an insufferable uncle older brother thing whose arm i periodically chew on until i reach bone and let him carry me back to bed when im tired of being annoyed of him.
#long post#persona 4 spoilers#persona 4 arena spoilers#kommento#sulululat#pagsususuri#tohru adachi#p4#// SCREAAAMS SO FUCKING LOUDDDD IM FREEE IM FREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE THIS SHULDNT HAVE TAKEN THE WHOLE DAY BUT IT DIDDDD IT FUCKING DIDDDDD#// sorry for code switching in the middle of writing i was trying to translate this word and it didnt feel right as a direct tl#// friend cameo shes the one who read the manga and watched vl with me and proved my theories thatnks to friendship#// MEME BY ANOTHER BESTIE TOO THIS IS TEAMWORK#// sorry for what happened at the ultimax segment im normal now i prommy#// revising this on laptop MY BACK HUURTTSSS FUCKKK#// the rokusai part is another thing though these tags are like an hour apart#// i think im done oh my god im so tired i couldnt put rokusai's manga in the diagram IM SORRY ROKUROSAITOOOO#// i dont want to say this is a dissertation of sorts but all of the things i write are incomprehensible mishmashes of information put toge#// ANYWAY IM DONE FOR ! IM TIRED ! this is the biggest adachi centric thing ive done right next to the tierlist explanation i dont think iv#// ever posted here IM SORRY OKYAKUSAN !!!!!!! anyway heres the . fuckingg. thing. highlighting manager's choice because thats MEEEE :33333
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every time i rewatch the chapel scene i feel like im losing my mind like that's real it's in there in the show it was written and filmed it's canon we didn't make it up it's not a dream or a collective hallucination. speirs just decided lip was due for some high praise and warm smiles in the candlelight and i just have to sit here and take it
#oh guys im so fucking normal about speirton rn#not zooming in my room or crawling up the walls or anything#just a normal regular guy with a normal regular interest#watching it is like ohh so thats why im still writing for the guys with a 2 minute long interaction. makes sense when its THIS#like Dear God.#posting a lot today sorry#rewatch shenanigans
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fun fact! this was both the last thing i made in 2022 and the first thing i made in 2023!
inspired by the video ever :3 rendog miku drop pop candy post frfr
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#that hello chat gif leaves me in tears im going insane#hatsune miku#miku fanart#miku hatsune#rendog#renthedog#rendog fanart#renthedog fanart#im so lost someone pick me up im scared theres too many new tags#do i tag this with the hermos? ehhhhhhhhhhhhhhh ill say no. bc its. its not. ? yeah ok i wont#idk why it took me so long to - oh my god hold on a moment rens glasses shines are completely fucked-#sorry ok its been like 12 minutes for me. you dont ever need to see how bad that was#i literally dont understand how i never noticed that before 😭😭-#idk why it took me so long to actually go about posting this.#those last 4 tags were initially in a bigass blurb paragraph but. no one needs to see that on their miku rendog post.
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i have been Considering. watching sgt frog again. bc i stopped at around 119 . and it is a very fun show. but The Horrors
#sgt frog#keroro gunso#i cannot explain to you the amount of mental shit i have to brace myself for when watching this show#its good! dont fucking watch it. please god#its like home//stuck . like im dead serious it has the same effect#everyone who ive asked about hs to. has told me Never to read it#and im going to repeat that same sentiment for sgt frog. Never fucking watch this show /lh#they GET YOU with the first episode it's CAPTIVATING it's UNIQUE its like CANDY#and the rest of the show is one Long#Long#terrible horrible no good Very Bad trip . that IS GOOD. in some parts#but sometimes it leaves you wondering what the FUCK they were smoking in the writer's office#this isnt accounting for how unwelcome in the fandom i feel being a keroro fictive btw. which is its whole OTHER POST that nobody'll read#my point is . fucking . sgt frog sucks (affectionately derogatory)#it aged like the finest Milk left out on a Hot summer day in arizona#and by god we are all consuming the absolutely rotten curds#sorry for that analogy it was trhe best i got#btw i put this in the main tags . bc everyone Knows sgt frog sucks. we;ve all agreed this show sucks Butt and Ass and Balls#i should hope so anyways#because it does. its GOOD dont get me wrong. but Oh My God is it Bad
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oc wants meme
I'm just gonna do this for Sora and Sam, my main guys. Listen, it's a bad pain day and talking about my OCs cheers me up
Sora Yumura
His faceclaim is Miura Haruma, when he had longer hair. The first pic is The Sora pic. My Photoshop skills aren't that good but that's as good as they're going to get, and I think it gets the idea of what he looks like across. But the second one is an extremely Sora facial expression.
Description: Tall, a little too skinny, but well-dressed and strikingly attractive, with wavy green hair and observant grey eyes in a clever face. A lot of poise, a lot of charisma, witty but respectful. All of that is a mask and he is really hoping you're taken in by his facade of functionality, but it is convincing as hell. Even dazzling, at times, if he needs to really turn on the bright lights. So almost everyone falls for it, in the end. His (rich) parents died when he was young and he was raised by his (incredibly rich) aunt and uncle, who were emotionally abusive, although he would say that that's an exaggeration. His little cousin is like a brother to him, and he protected him from his aunt and uncle as best he could, but that didn't stop him from getting the fuck out of Japan entirely as soon as he could leave for university. (There were other reasons and other traumas behind that too, but this isn't Sora's entire life story lol.)
What do they say they want? (i.e., what are the desires they put out into the world and have no trouble admitting)
Sora wants the top job. He won't be crass enough to actually say that to you, but his ambition is clear enough if you're in a position to look at his education and employment choices. He wants what's best for his loved ones, of course, which will always include his little cousin Ibushi, and depending on time period may also include Sam and his children, if he has any in the AU in question. He is likely to downplay how serious he is about that, however, and he won't mention his small circle of close friends, whose safety and well-being he is just as intense about. (But if their well-being is actually at issue, you may find yourself surprised by his complete 180 from charming and diplomatic to grim and uncompromising and ruthless.)
In all honesty, Sora isn't very open with most people about how he feels or what he wants. Aside from really surface-level stuff ("I'd kill for a coffee"), this is about all you're going to get.
What do they think they want? (i.e., what are the desires they keep hidden and only admit to their closest loved ones)
He wants to keep his loved ones safe and happy, and to them he'll admit that he'll do a whole lot to make that happen. He wants to believe his parents would be proud of him. He wants to be able to use his power to make a positive difference, but also to advance his personal interests, and he doesn't feel particularly bad about the second one. He wants to crush all his competition and see the looks on their pathetic faces when they realize he's beaten them, but he wants no one else to even notice anything has happened, because it's more satisfying that way. He wants to raise his children differently from how he was raised.
What do they actually want? (i.e., what is something they subconsciously need, but either do not realize or cannot admit)
Sora wants to feel safe. He hasn't felt safe since his parents died and he went to live with his aunt and uncle, which means in most AUs he doesn't remember ever feeling that way, and in the others it's a faint, hazy memory and he kind of suspects he made it up. He doesn't think in those terms, though, which is a shame because it's behind a lot of his decision-making. As time passes, he will start to experience transient moments of safety with Sam, and as he gets older, the omnipresent sense of danger will decrease some. That's about the best he's gonna get, but he'll still be grateful for it, without being able to name what it is.
Sam Quinn
He doesn't have a picture. :C I'm sorry, Sam. He is also @vashtijoy's OC as much as he is mine but I am writing about him nonetheless.
Description: Very tall giant man, with fluffy golden hair and hazel eyes that are quick to brighten with amusement. Otherwise, they're calm and thoughtful. Sensual lips, either a skinny nerd frame or an intimidatingly muscled frame depending on which AU he comes from. He's the middle child of a normal and loving middle-class family in London (unless the AU dictates that he is a medieval peasant instead, but he remains the middle child of a loving family). His curiosity and cleverness have often gotten him into Oxford, but also often gotten him into trouble. I wish you could be less interested in explosions, Sam.
What do they say they want? (i.e., what are the desires they put out into the world and have no trouble admitting)
Sam wants to learn things! He wants to study, read books, go to interesting places, and build his professional life around learning and discovery. He often ends up as an academic, and sometimes a teacher. He is often grabbed by a new interest and gets sucked into it for a bit, and he will definitely tell you everything he hopes to find out about it. He wants to be able to help his siblings take care of his parents when they get old. He wants to do good and help the less fortunate, especially once he marries into Soras $100mil+ family (which is only a family once he marries into it; it was just Sora until that point, alone with his parents' inheritance).
What do they think they want? (i.e., what are the desires they keep hidden and only admit to their closest loved ones)
He wants a family. He's always the reason they have kids. Sora loves their children and is a devoted father once they have them, but he only agrees to adopt (or find a surrogate, or use whatever magical gay-parent baby method is available) because having children means so much to Sam.
He also wants to be open about their relationship, when being closeted is often important to Sora's career, and so Sora has to make a decision about what to prioritize. (The answer is Sam. He chooses Sam. But it's genuinely difficult for him.) Sam doesn't ever ask him to make that choice, but when Sora pushes, he will admit that being closeted makes him sad.
You might be getting the impression that Sam is less of a complicated tangle of needs and wants and impulses than Sora. You're right! Sora is *gestures* like he is, and Sam is not like that.
What do they actually want? (i.e., what is something they subconsciously need, but either do not realize or cannot admit)
He wants a community. A family with Sora and children is probably the best way to make this happen, but in other AUs it's been Sora and a few friends they often see and trade with. He just needs a little group of people around him. Like Sora, he isn't really aware of this innermost need. He just thinks he wants kids because he wants to be a dad, which is also true.
Sam just doesnt thrive when he's alone, even if he's in the middle of a city. That's not a community; he needs something tight-knit, where he's respected for who he is as a person and what he can contribute. (In some AUs, that's another answer to this question. He wants someone to see him and think he's not broken just because he's curious and asks questions.) ...Gotta say, though, all of this causes a lot fewer problems than Sora's constant the-alarm-is-broken sense of being in danger does.
Sora does poorly when he's alone as well, although he doesn't need a community in the same way. He needs people who are his, and who he belongs to in turn. The best way to make him feel safe is to make him feel protected. So although their wants are different, they harmonize, inasmuch as Sora's desperate, clawing, wailing sense of danger can harmonize with anything.
#oh my god my head hurts so god damn fucking much its been like this for so long#im losing my fucking mind#this was a nice distraction and thinking abt their secret innermost wants was instructive actually#but now the distraction is DONE. fuck#sorry ik this has nothing to do with the post im just not very good at the equanimity some ppl have abt their chronic pain#might be time to think abt trying to sleep again...#anyway! i love sora and sam so so much. have u ever like. made something. and then been like yes thats it thats the Thing#the thing i was meant to make. everything else i ever made was just practice for this thing#idk how to put it into words rly but sora is the Thing#(lmao)#my post#sora yumura#sam quinn#sosam
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MAC I HAVE A QUESTION. VERY IMPORTANT. what on EARTH is the suckening. i have seen posts on ur blog with blood and such tagged jrwi suckening and i am so so intrigued i love blood and gore and fucked up homoeroticism <3 pls pls pls tell me what the suckening is i am on my knees begging rn
oh dude holy fucking shit . so. u know i have been posting about jrwi it has been my main thing since like november. well. in case u do not know. its a dnd podcast run by charlie slimecicle, grizzlyplays, condifiction and bizly. their main campaign is called Riptide and its the one with the fish guy and all the pirates. WELL. they have a patreon and on their patreon they sometimes do mini campaigns! let me preface this by saying i have never even REMOTELY had an interest in paying for ANYTHING on patreon only because i fuckinf hate subscription payments and also im usually hesitant about paying money for fandom things especially in the content creator sphere etc etc you know how it is . HOWEVER. god their pther campaigns are so fucking worth it dude. the long running secondary main campaign thats been going along around the same time as riptide is called Prime Defenders and its a superhero themed one! i am just at the beginning of season 2 rn its so good william wisp my absolute beloved. (something else rlly cool is that they rotate being the dm for each of the campaigns and i think that makes each of them really fresh and unique bc everyone has a different dm style and a different way of telling a story. god i fucking love dnd and collaborative storytellint its incredible)
ANYWAY IM GRTTING SIDETRACKED. so during hiatuses from riptide and pd they sometimes run limited campaigns that only go for a handful of epsiodes. one of this is. regrettably. called the Suckening. its run using the vampires: masquerade ttrpg setup and ruleset which is. obviously. centered around vampires. CHARLIE SLIMECICLE is the dm and i fucking love it because god that man has a mind for horror. (he also ran blood in the bayou which was a 4-epispde mini campaign using call of cthulu and ive listened to it like 3 times now bc its got nasty bug body horror in it hooooly shit its so good) ANYWAY. um . its not *as* homoerotic as the fanart makes it out to be. just a warning. but there is a scene where two homies drink each others blood (one is a human one is a vampire. theres this think in the masquerade called blood bonding and its like. if you get a human to drink your blood on three separate occasions they become your servant basically. really homoerotic stuff in theory) and when the vampire is scolded for it he goes "well he already loves me. hes my boy" and they generally have that dynamic going on. fizzfangs i lvoe you.
ANYWAY UHHHHH. the first ... four? five? episodes are up for free on YouTube and theyve got a fun little visual novel style to them with the official character art :] heres a link 2 the first ep!!
youtube
the rest (there are 8 episodes as of rn!) are totally on patreon but if u end up listening and liking them enough to want the rest hit me up because ive got those download links i can share with u bc ur my beloved mutual and i love sharing things with my friends so they dont have to pay for them <3
#whiskey PLEASE if u end up listening. plead efor the love of god talk to me about jrwi#its been in my brain for so fucking long dude i love them so much. obsessed. unhealthily#gillion tidestrider has taken up permanent residence in my mind. hello gillion i love you.#if u want a breakdown of the player characters (and also soda) i would be happy 2 give them to u. but this ask was already so long#this is my can of worms you cannot open it ill be so annoying.#i was feeling a specific type of way last night which is why you suddenly saw an influx of fizzfangs posts im not sorry it will happen again#oh also grefgor is there hes my angel the light of my life. i fucking love everything about grefgor forever#from the top rope my prince!#hes like. u know when theres a prince and a knight and theyre a little gay about it. yeah.#i looooove grefgor.... i love shilo i love emizel i ESPECIALLY love soda#....arthur is there too i guess#hehe#friends!!!#asks#hi whsikey. im going to be so annoying to you
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GOD. Epilogue of "A Dream a Kirin Dreamed" pisses me off. This is not to say it's bad by any stretch. It just pisses me off because WHY DIDN'T KIRYU BOTHER TO TELL DAIGO ANYTHING. Why did he just say "He didn't betray you" without backing up his point at all and then fuck off entirely without checking back in.
The man just woke up and he's awake for a week before he's discharged from the hospital??? Maybe catch him up to speed on something that's clearly weighing on him??? Or on anything else that's happened in the time he was unconscious ??? Hello???????
Like. Dude. Is it not enough that you're just dead weight for the entire fucking ending. Knowing this is your son's best friend. And no way he doesn't know because even aside from Mine's monologue which (obviously) focused on his perspective, Kiryu says himself when he encounters a journalist who can't find any friends or family to interview about Mine that Daigo would know him best.
KNOWING this is your son's best friend. You LET him kill himself in front of you both because for you, sitting on your ass and going "Mine!" was good enough. You didn't think to reason with him. You didn't think to grab onto his leg or something when he was three feet away. You weren't injured. You weren't THAT exhausted. You just didn't think to do it. Even though A SUBSTORY IN Y3 ENDS THE WAY THE MAIN STORY SHOULD HAVE AND IT'S ONE OF THE LAST THINGS YOU CAN DO BEFORE HEADING TO THE HOSPITAL.
Y3 ending is literally my Y7 ending in terms of how much anger rises up within me whenever I think about it because it just Somehow, To This Day, piles more and more on top that makes it worse than it already was. Like its ONLY saving grace is that Mine didn't actually die. Allegedly. At least you can argue Ichiban and Aoki didn't have time to react, but Kiryu had all the time in the world and did nothing.
Ok I need to stop I need to stop I know I should be mad at Yokoyama and Takeuchi and not Kiryu and I literally had to run this post through an all-caps -> sentence caps converter But Anyway Point Is If Ichi Had Been The Protagonist Of Y3 Mine Would Be Alive
i cant even really blame something like kiryu's emotional ineptitude to explain why he couldnt just be open about What Mine's Business Was because the guy can CLEARLY speak from the heart and say good and honest things. like he knows how to communicate For The Most Part so its truly just. The Fuck Happened Here you dont think it wouldve been a good idea to get daigo up to speed on the past week or 👁️👁️ just saying Mine Didn't Betray You is like. a FAIR start i GUESS but ELABORATE a bit ??
not at all a 'rare' L moment just a typical kiryu L honestly (;´д`)
#long post#snap chats#mizuki goated fr fr. highkey those two's substories are my fave theyre so fuckin bizarre.....#BUT REAL LIKE KIRYU. ILY I DO IM SORRY but i KNOW your ass can get up#mine DID just beat your ass but youre not THAT banged up and its not like you have any reason to relax after knowin richardsons alive#like there was PLENTY of time to react this some yakuza 'let him finish speaking its honorable' bullshit i PROMISE (;´༎ຶД༎ຶ`)(;´༎ຶД༎ຶ`)#dont look down here im ranting about y7 related stuff#OK BUT NO THIS JUST REMINDED ME OF ONE OF THE MOST INFURIATING TAKES I READ ONCE#AND IT WAS BASICALLY PEOPLE BLAMING ICHI FOR AOKI DYING LIKE EXCUSE ME#how on gods green earth was ichi supposed to react in time- when its KUME of all people#what the fuck was he supposed to assume was going to happen its KUME he's a wet rag of a bitch boy#especially when all he did was praise aoki like how the fuck was he supposed to think he would stab him oh my godddd#like its not just kume showing up either ichi and aoki JUST had an intense emotional moment and they finally got a chance to breathe#like they thought they were good and in the clear and they were in a steadily-getting-better mood why would they be on guard (;´༎ຶД༎ຶ`)#FORGIVE ME thats been bothering me for months. i needed it off my chest#anyway im going for a walk. we got ice cream today and idk why i eat ice cream when it always makes me sad/lethargic#so heres to hoping a lil nature walk and heavy metal improves my mood a bit
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I'm about to talk about PISS so if you're not into that LOOK AWAY NOW
on my hands and knees on the bed with Tony fucking me from behind and Steve laying underneath me licking my clit when I squirt all over his face 💘💓💝💗💖
#It took me SO LONG to type this#i as kicking and screaming the whole time#shaking my head over and over again saying oh my god oh my god#this is probably the most obscene thing ive written as of yet#im SORRY this is GROSS#i dont know how people write smut im fucking sweating over here#i dont think i can post this oh my god#NO i SHALL!!!!!!#AAAAAAAAUVH
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when you're short
#humanstuck#theyre not twins theyre a system thank uuuuu [shoots into the sun]#my sister pointed out that i draw my eyes rlly far apart n i was like 'huh nooo i think its jus my cal'#i checked the rest of my art and. oh my god. i cant fucking unsee it. half the time their eyes are touching the edges of their face.#AUGRH#(that was a while ago but im mentioning it now shh)#scheduled frm post limit#frm like. 3pm. when u see this. its 12a. ok.#tbh i think cherubs are naturally skinny (as prepubescents) but like. i dont care i draw em w chub if i want.#also theyre vietnamese american texans in my mind. sorry. ik they should be british but theyre so fake british theyre american in my mind.#they watch a bunch of british shows growing up and get a faux british combined texan accent. its horrible.#currently debating if callie calls herself a teaboo or not#REMEMBER TEABOOOSSS AAAAAAAAAA#its 4 now yall i take so long on these tags........
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